#or the uh… cat being derpy

[dracomeir]

omg thank you everyone <3

[ancient-cats-unite]

Slime Class 101

Dockor Heaven teaches a bunch of toddlers how slimes work.

"Hehe! Funny teacher!"

Prof. Cat Jobs was being tormented by kittens. Lil Lion ran around him at high speeds, Lil Dragon Cat was muching in his ear, and Lil Flying Cat smacked his coffee off his desk. He was in hell. Cute kitten daycare hell.

The other kits were doing their own thing. Lil Tank Cat drew him and Cameraman together and ate a biscuit. Lil Macho Legs was getting pummeled by Lil Jamiera over apple juice. Lil Mohawk Cat and Lil Dark Cat were ripping the shit out of a plushie, giving out little war cries. Lil Island was chilling in his tank, drinking the water and pet fish.

"Oh golly, where is the doctor? I'm going around the bend!"

Prof. Cat Jobs looked at his watch, losing his mind. Docktor Heaven was supposed to be paying the kids a surprise visit with Slime Cat. Where were they?

Almost on cue, Docktor Heaven appeared right behind the professor. Prof. Cat Jobs yelped, falling out of his chair with the tiny tormentors.

"Thank god! I was on my wits end! How did you get in?"

"No matter! Where are the children?"

"Dobbor! They here!"

Slime Cat was in some sort of humanized form. It was quite unstable, considering how much it stained their clothing. He looked 6 years old, in a cute sailor outfit. A little sailor slime child with metal prostetics.

The mini menaces came off of Prof. Cat Jobs. Lil Dragon Cat was scooped up into Slime Cats hand. Dragon roared, while the others stared in curiosity.

"It tiney! The dragon tiney!"

"Yes, yes, everyone here is miniscule, Slime Cat. Now, can you get the rest of the kittens? Put them on the rug."

"Yes!"

Slime Cat scooped all the Lils up, one by one, and brought them to the middle of the room. Lil Flying Cat was a bit tricky to get, and so was Lil Island. Lil Lion went wild when he saw Slime, roaring affectionately. Slime Cat put everyone on the rug.

"All so tiney! Hi Lion!"

"Wonderful job, Slime Cat. Now go set up my projector. Professor Cat Jobs will start the class."

Prof. Cat Jobs was still recovering from the little attack. Though, when the tiny kits settled down, he got to indroducing the visitors.

"Uh, everyone, this is Docktor Heaven and their assistant. They're here to teach us about science! Take it away, Doctor."

Prof. Cat Jobs backed up, before full on sprinting out the childcare door. The tiny terrors looked at Heaven and their slimy accquaintance.

"Hello children, ever seen a human being crafted from chemicals? Well our tremendous Slime Cat is!"

"CHEMICALS!"

Slime Cat pulled out two empty glass beakers.

"Today, we'll show you how to create sentient slime creatures made from mixtures. But what exactly consists of a slime? This type of slime is 75% serotonin, 5% natural additives, and 15% water!"

Lil Island Cat raised his fin.

"Yes?"

"What the other 5%?"

"I'll get to that soon. Thanks to their high serotonin, Silme's happiness is contagious. Try looking at them with a straight face. They make wonderful emotional support. Make sure to take good care of slimes, as they are delicate creatures."

Slime Cat shone a derpy smile, causing Docktor Heaven to pat him on the head. The class gazed in awe. Slime Cat pulled up a diagram.

"Now, slimes are made from thick sap, moss, or unknown ressources. Our Slime is made out of sap and unknown origin. Usually sap ones have trouble coming out of their shell, but this enigmatic substance must have given them some confidence. Moss ones are crankier, and a slime purely out of unclassified liquid is incredibly happy, but defenseless."

Slime Cat showed a very disgruntled mossy green slime, a shy glossy yellow slime, and a beaming opaque white slime. Before they could go into more detail, the bell rang.

"Ah, I'm guessing your parents are picking you up now. Orders from your teacher say to prepare for dismissal. We'll resume tommorow."

The kittens mewled in anger. However, they obeyed. Once everyone left, Prof. Cat Jobs came back.

"They left! You did a terrific job. Are you coming back tomorrow?"

"Yes, we still haven't finished our lesson. I wish you a good day, Professor."

Prof. Cat Jobs packed up and went home. A poorly drawn "KICK ME" sign was taped on his coat. Docktor Heaven carried Slime Cat in their arms, making the kid babble.

"We go home?"

"In a bit Slime Cat. Gabriel is almost done his outbreak. I'll take care of cleanup later, go back to base, alright? Saki should be done school."

"Yay!! Bib sis Saki! Bye bye!"

Slime Cat went home, small droplets of slime trailing behind.

-------------------------------

//HUMAN SLIME CAT TIME WOOOOOOOOOOO//

//Also sorry for being dead, enjoy some Docktor Heaven teaching literal babies about how their kid works.//

[umbry-fic]

A Palette Full of You (6)

Summary: Glimpses into Colette and Lloyd’s lives as they grow up together, learn who they are, and fall in love with each other.

(Written for Colloyd Week 2021)

Fandom: Tales of Symphonia Characters: Lloyd Irving, Colette Brunel, Zelos Wilder Relationships: Colette Brunel & Lloyd Irving Rating: G Chapter: 6 of 6 Word Count: 3442 Mirror Link: AO3 Original Post Date: 15/06/2021

Chapter Title: Ace Up Your Sleeve

Chapter Summary: Colette finally comes to the end of a long journey and finds the answer she didn't know she was seeking all along.

(Colloyd Week Day 7: Free Day)

Notes+Warnings: Last chapter of my multi chapter Colloyd week fic! Zelos is also... Demisexual! Warning for mentions of acephobia.

Thank you to anyone who's read all the way through and big thank you to everyone for a great Colloyd week!!!

Chapter list Full fic Previous chapter

~~~

17-years-old

“You haven’t been listening at all, have you?”

"What? Uh, no! You - you were talking about denominators?" Colette snapped to attention, scrambling for an excuse as she was met with Zelos' searching stare. Her friend was sitting across from her, their fingers drumming impatiently against the long table they were seated at in the common area by the bookstore, a dozen other students seated at the other long tables and quietly murmuring amongst themselves.

"You haven't written anything down," Zelos muttered, tapping the open exam paper in front of Colette. What they said was true - there were no new markings in green ink on the paper, only the blue ink that had been scribbled down during the exam and the red crosses left behind by the teacher. "It is a bit annoying to have been talking to a brick wall for the past five minutes, you know."

"Sorry for wasting your time." Colette bowed her head, feeling rather horrible. She was the one who had asked Zelos to help her explain some of the midterm questions that her teacher had skipped over. Zelos was a surprisingly good math teacher when they felt like it, giving calm and comprehensive explanations that seemed distanced from the usual flirty and boisterous Zelos. Not that Colette could tell they were being flirty - it all just came off as normal conversation to her, even though Sheena often complained they were.

Yet she'd gotten distracted.

"It's alright; no hard feelings or anything. What's got your attention so badly, though?" Zelos enquired, raising one eyebrow and beginning to play with the ends of their ponytail.

“Um... That…?” Colette stuttered, waving her arms in the vague direction of Zelos’ school bag. Oh, this was so awkward.

“That…?” Zelos echoed, staring at their school bag with their brow furrowed, before seemingly coming to a realisation as their face cleared. “Oh! What? The frog pin?”

Yes, that was what she'd been staring at for the past ten minutes: the new pin. Next to the familiar enamel pin of a grumpy kitten playing with a ball of yarn that was purple and yellow in colour, was one of a derpy frog sitting on a lilypad. It was cute. (Add frogs to anything and it would be cute. That was a principle she strongly believed in.) But what was confounding her was the peculiar colouration of the lilypad: purple, white and grey.

“Uh… Yeah…” Colette averted her gaze as her fingers jumped from place to place, trying to expel all of her nervous energy - picking at the folded sleeve of her white blouse, fiddling with the school badge pinned over her breast, smoothing out the wrinkles in her green skirt. She hadn't brought up the curiosity eating away at her because she hadn't wanted to force Zelos into a spot where they felt like they had to answer.

Silence reigned for a few seconds as she began to panic. As she’d feared, Zelos didn’t want to talk about it. Oh, what to do? She didn't want to offend them or anything.

“It’s a cute pin! That’s all!” she blurted out, hoping that would give them both an out from this situation.

Zelos let out a loud exhale, placing a hand on their forehead in exasperation. "You could have just asked, you know? I wouldn't have pinned it there if I didn't expect questions. For anyone else, I would just answer that I like the colours. But for you, my trusted friend, I'll tell you the truth. It's the asexual flag colours. I got it from the same place as the cat one; they released a new frog line just last month. Cute, right?”

“Very,” she chirped, relieved that Zelos wasn’t mad. “Frogs are always cute, no matter what they’re doing. But, uh... If you don’t mind me asking another question, what do you mean by asexual?”

She'd heard that word once or twice from Sheena when she was working on her bio homework, but never in the context of people. Surely it was something relating to gender or sexuality, considering the yarn tangled in the kitten's paws was in the non-binary flag colours. She knew that much, even if she wasn't on social media a whole lot.

If she knew more, then she’d better understand her friend! That had always been one of her greatest desires - to learn more about her friends, all of whom were their own unique persons, holding diverse qualities and each facing their own set of challenges. If she didn’t have the necessary information, she couldn’t support them to her best capabilities.

“I can't explain the whole thing right now, but it's basically a spectrum," Zelos replied flippantly, raising a finger. "It means feeling little to no sexual attraction. You know, never looking at anyone and thinking you want to… do it with them.” Zelos cocked their head, gaze slipping towards the ceiling. “Is that a good way to describe it? Hm...”

But their words were washing uselessly over Colette, who had frozen into a statue. Her heart sat unmoving in her chest, her mind both running on overdrive and feeling incredibly sluggish as she struggled to process what she'd just heard. It felt like she was pushing through water, the pressure pressing against her.

"There's a word for that?" she couldn't help but blurt out, eyes wide in shock as her fingers opened and closed uselessly. Time itself seemed to have ground to a halt, her heart unable to decide how she wanted to feel. She was stuck in limbo.

"Well, yes? It's an entire identity - Woah, Angel, you all right?"

Zelos laid a worried hand on her shoulder, just now noticing the wild look on her face.

"There - there's a word for how I feel?" she whispered as she placed her shaking hands in her lap.

Ever since she'd fallen in love, she had lived each day with the question of why she was broken buried in the back of her mind, casting a constant miserable cloud over her. She didn't want to keep waiting for the day where she would want what everyone else did, for she had no hope that day would ever come. But she had thought she had no other choice, her heart shrivelling in her chest every time she was told that everyone was supposed to be attracted to someone.

This was an answer she hadn't known had existed, and had just somehow fallen from the heavens in answer to the prayers she had hesitantly made for something or someone to fix her. But if there was a word that belonged to her, an identity that meant she wasn't broken, she would gladly accept it. She couldn't describe the immense relief she felt, like the invisible shackles chaining her down had finally been unlocked with the key of knowledge.

"Oh. I... I had my suspicions, but I didn't want to assume," Zelos muttered, their expression equally as shocked as hers as they removed their hand. "So... You..."

All along, she'd thought she was alone, the only one in the whole wide world who felt this way. But there were others. Even someone right across from her, a friend who had experienced the same thing the entire time.

She wasn't alone.

It was liberating to know that.

"I... I think so?" The relief had been replaced with an almost dizzying excitement, one that made it hard to speak. Or focus. "Can you tell me more?" she asked eagerly, leaning closer. The fires of curiosity had now reached an all-time high, her need to know overtaking all else. She wanted to know everything.

"Calm down, calm down! I can talk to you about it after school," Zelos replied with a happy chuckle. "Right now, though, you should go back to class. The bell's going to ring soon."

Her gaze snapped to the wall clock, which showed there were only 8 minutes left till her GP period. "Oh, you're right!" Springing to her feet, Colette stuffed her math paper into her school bag, frantic energy unable to leave her body. "But promise you'll tell me more? Please?"

"It's a promise, Angel. I'd be happy to."

Giving Zelos one final wave goodbye, Colette started running up the stairs, a huge grin on her face. She couldn't explain why she was so happy, fireworks exploding in her chest.

Only that the world that had always been against her had finally started to make a tiny bit of sense.

~~~

18-years-old

“Lloyd?” Colette said quietly, setting the plate in her hands down on the study table. She smoothed his wet hair out of his eyes, only for it to fall right back into place.

It was quite late, the digital clock on the study table displaying 07:30 in red, blinking digits. Sheena and Zelos had already quit revising and left at six, saying they were going to get dinner together, but Lloyd had insisted on staying to continue. “Only a month left to As,” he’d muttered, head buried in his A4 notebook full of econs notes and eyes frantic with worry.

“Lloyd?” she said, a little louder this time. But he showed no signs of stirring, eyes still firmly closed, breaths steadily trickling in and out of his nose. They’d migrated to her room after Sheena and Zelos had left, Lloyd using the study table while she took residence on the bay window, having shifted all of her soft toys to the bed. She’d returned from making a sandwich in the kitchen (without tomatoes, of course), to find him slumped over on the desk, his pen on the floor.

Colette sighed. She didn’t have the heart to wake him up now, not when he looked so peaceful, lit by the warm light of the table lamp. He could stay.

She opened the drawer of the study table, gaze landing immediately on the folded up letter that had Lloyd’s name written on the cover. Reaching out to touch the smooth paper, she wondered if today was the day she would finally have the courage to give it to Lloyd.

Over a year had passed since Zelos had introduced the word asexual to her. As promised, they'd gone over the entire concept with her, an activity that had taken hours, until she was utterly certain the identity fit her. Scarily so. It explained all the little moments throughout her life that she'd had no explanation for until now. She'd spent a whole day afterwards just being stupidly euphoric, unable to wipe the large smile off her face, overjoyed that that were so many others like her all around the world, a loving community who shared her experiences and would accept her with open arms.

The euphoria she had felt at that moment had dimmed, of course. But she was still much happier than she ever used to be, now armed with the knowledge that she didn't need to change. She wasn't broken, for there was nothing to fix. This was just who she was, and she no longer had to force herself to act in how society deemed right or feel awful for not being able to do so.

But there was still fear involved. Keeping secrets from Lloyd was just... not in her nature. Every second that she was alone with him was a moment where she wanted to inform him of her life-changing realisation, for while telling him would not change much, it would be authentically living her truth. Even if she never confessed her feelings, she wanted to tell him as a friend, a companion. The words she wanted to say burned on her tongue, but every time she opened her mouth nothing came out, the jitters in her stomach overpowering her will. Zelos was the one who had suggested writing a letter. Easier to express in text everything she wanted to in one go without all the stutters and awkward pauses that would no doubt come from a face-to-face encounter.

Picking the letter up, she slowly slid it under Lloyd’s open right hand, praying that he didn’t wake up right at this moment and heaving a sigh of relief when he didn’t. She was staking everything on him heeding the first line she’d written, almost a month ago, pouring her heart out onto paper with shaking hands. Please, read this to the end. And at the end of it, she prayed that he’d still be willing to talk to her.

She had read countless horror stories. People who refused to believe asexuality existed. People who argued that no one could know they were asexual until they’d had a sexual experience, who then turned around and argued in the same breath that those who’d had sexual experiences couldn’t possibly be asexual. People who continued to claim that asexuals just hadn’t met the right person because sex was what made us human and people who didn’t feel sexual attraction must be cold, unfeeling monsters with standards that were way too high. People who stared at you with pity and tried to comfort you for “missing out”. People who told you they could "fix" you.

Lloyd was the most accepting person she knew, and she didn't believe he could ever be that way. Still, there was no guarantee how this would end. At least she had the advantage of being in the safety of her own home. She could kick him out if she needed to, even if cutting him out of her life would be akin to ripping her own heart out. But better to rip the bandaid off now than let the secret lurk in her heart.

Straightening up, she shut off the table lamp to give Lloyd some peace. She made her quick retreat out of the room, heading to the kitchen and placing the sandwich into the fridge. Lloyd did so love his sandwiches cold.

The only thing left to do was wait.

There was no sound filling the living room but the ticking coming from the analogue clock hanging on the wall that Dad still refused to replace, even after twenty years. It was always in need of a change of batteries or a tuning.

Adjusting her position so her head was pillowed on one of the many cushions, her eyelids unwittingly shut. She hadn’t noticed how heavy they’d felt until now, when she had nothing to do. After a whole day spent splitting her head over chemistry mechanisms, sinking into the soft leather without any chemical equations to squint at felt like heaven. Maybe she deserved a little rest.

Just a little…

~~~

“Colette.”

She groaned, rolling onto her side away from the voice’s origin and throwing her arm over her face.

Who…? Where…?

“Colette!”

The voice was a little more insistent this time, a hand gently shaking her by the shoulders.

Knowing she had to wake up now, Colette opened her eyes, staring with blurred vision at the cream couch cushions. Craning her neck, she spotted a blob of peach and brown hovering over her that eventually solidified into Lloyd’s face.

“Lloyd…?”

“Hey.” Lloyd moved his hand to her back to steady her as she slowly sat up, rubbing at her eyes. He took a seat next to her, their shoulders pressed together. “Sorry to wake you up, but I need to tell you I’m going home soon.”

“Oh! That’s good...” Colette mumbled groggily, having still not fully come to her senses. She couldn’t quite recall what had occurred between studying and falling asleep here. She could remember that Lloyd was supposed to go home.

There was something else, wasn’t there…?

“I guess we’re both tired. If you were going to sleep you should have just done it on the bed, silly,” Lloyd admonished her, poking her arm. “Too late for that. At least you had the good sense to sleep on your back. Mine hurts.” He threw his arms over the back of the sofa, stretching his back, joints popping.

“Ah, right. Sorry for not waking you up sooner… It’s just… You looked like you were having a nice nap.”

“No, it’s alright,” Lloyd placed his hand over hers, interlocking their fingers and squeezing. “I did enjoy it. I needed the break. And thank you for the sandwich. It was delicious"

"No problem." She yawned, giving her own long stretch.

“Anyway… The other reason I woke you up was to tell you I read your letter.”

Lloyd held up a familiar sheet of paper, the crease where it had once been folded in half clearly visible. Her stomach sank immediately into a pit of dread as she bowed her head, her free hand curling into a fist.

There it was. That was what she was forgetting. But she’d made the choice to go forward, and there was no backing down now.

However, now that the moment of reckoning was here, only the worst-case scenarios were running through her head. She was ready to pull away and run, pulse skyrocketing.

“Hey! Hey. Don’t panic.” Lloyd’s thumb started drawing tiny circles on her palm, a motion so familiar to her that she instinctively started taking deep breaths to calm herself down. It was like he'd predicted she was going to bolt like a frightened rabbit. “The first thing I wanted to say was thank you for telling me something so important to you. I know how scary it is. Remember when it was my turn?”

“You…? You weren’t scared at all!” Colette protested, raising her head and meeting Lloyd’s gaze. The light tone to his voice was reassuring, as was the smile on his face. No condemnation to be found there, just a sweet happiness that warmed her own heart. “You figured it out so quickly and just blurted it right out!”

“I was petrified, trust me, even if it I didn't show. I don’t even know what possessed me to say it in the first place! But remember what you said to me, back then?”

“I like... boys too. Both girls and boys, you know?”

The whisper rang out in the silence, Lloyd facing away from her as she looked up from the comic she’d been reading, the two of them curled up together in the safe darkness of the tiny pillow fort they’d constructed in the living room.

“Okay,” she answered after a pause. “Uh… Well…”

She didn’t quite know how to put her thoughts into words.

“Who you like doesn’t change who you are!” she declared with gusto. That sounded cool. Right? But it was true. Lloyd would always be Lloyd. Silly, awkward, kind Lloyd.

In her eyes, there was no other possibility.

Colette still strongly believed that. She always would. But she had never thought those words would apply to her, a girl who stood by the sidelines looking in on a world she couldn’t understand.

“Those words meant the world to me, you know. And it's the same for you; I’d be a hypocrite for saying otherwise. You’re still the same person, Colette. Nothing’s changed. And although I can never see the world through your eyes, what I can do is listen to you. And that’s exactly what I plan to do.”

Colette sniffled, shoulders shaking as tears pooled in her eyes. She had thought she could get through this without breaking into tears, that she could sit and calmly accept whatever news she would receive. Clearly, that was not the case.

But it wasn't weak to cry.

Lloyd’s arms wrapped around her, a comforting embrace that she never wanted to leave.

“There’s nothing wrong with you,” Lloyd whispered into her ear, pulling her closer. “You’re just you.”

With shaking arms, she returned the embrace, burying her face in his shoulder as the tears overflowed. This time not out of overwhelming fear like she had on the rooftop, but out of incredible, crushing relief, the last of the weight leaving her shoulders, leaving her so free it was terrifying.

“And I’ll keep telling you that, as many times as you need to hear it. Just like you did for me.”

She already knew that all of the things he said were true - they were sentiments Zelos had already expressed, that she had already read on internet forums. But she'd underestimated how it would feel to find acceptance in someone who she loved with all her heart, and who viewed the world through a completely different lens.

To know that one was accepted, for every part of them… Wasn’t that the most beautiful thing?

“Thank you,” she choked out amid all the tears.

And for the first time in a truly long while, Colette thought that everything would be alright.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #371

“some of those that work forces are the same that burn crosses”

What is one song you feel as though you sing particularly well, if any? Probably none, lol. What was the last lengthy task you completed? I love these unique questions I've had lately, but damn, are a lot of my answers "I don't know," lol. What type of photography do you enjoy looking at? Do you take any photos yourself, and if so, what types of things do you prefer to photograph? I love floral and wildlife photography. Landscapes, too, and I have a great fondness for boudoir for reasons I've mentioned in previous surveys. I like taking nature pictures, mainly. Have you ever gone out for the Black Friday shopping rush? Did you enjoy it, or not so much? Or, what’s the busiest shopping day you’ve ever experienced? Hell no, that's a hard pass. I'm sure the busiest shopping experience I've had was like at the mall or something around Christmas, idk. Do you enjoy reading diaries or stories you wrote from when you were younger, or does it embarrass you? If you’ve kept them, was there a particular reason for hanging on to them so long? NO. I DON'T. BECAUSE I CRINGE INTO ANOTHER DIMENSION. I keep a lot of it for memory's sake, but goddamn, is it always embarrassing. What would you say was your first true hobby? What about your most recently developed one? Um... the first thing I really remember is video games. I played Spyro like, a LOT, along with other childhood games. I was just really into gaming at a young age. Is there one thing that throws off your mood more than others, whether it be lack of sleep, lack of food, heat/cold, etc., and when was the last time you felt especially cranky? THE HEAT. I become so irritable. I was needlessly cranky a few days ago for whatever reason. What kinds of things are you likely to complain about? My legs hurting, more than anything. Also being hot. Do you like to put any extra effort into your food in terms of presentation, or do you prefer to just put it on a plate and eat it as it is, no frills? Ha, no. It's not gonna look fancy in my stomach, so whatever. Have you ever dated someone who had kids? No, and I very much doubt I ever would. Are there any candles in the room with you? No. Does the last person you kissed have tattoos? No, but I tell her all the time that dainty nature tattoos would be THE most beautiful on her. When was the last time someone called you pretty? I think when I last updated my Facebook profile picture. Do you like the color pink? It's my favorite! Does your cell phone have a case on it? What color? It came with this thin purple one. What was the last song you had on repeat? "Moon Baby" by Godsmack. Ever kissed someone your parents hated? No. Your most recent ex says he/she hates you, you say? I wouldn't *say* anything, I'd break down sobbing. Would you feel hurt if your last ex was in a relationship? No. Have you ever had to choose between two people? Yes: Jason and Juan. Juan and I dated for less than a day not all that long before Jason and I got together, and Juan was pretty upset. He was nooot a fan of Jason due to a shared ex-girlfriend. Jason, meanwhile, just didn't care. What is the saddest thing that has happened to you? What about the happiest? I think the saddest thing has to be my breakup, especially when you know just how madly in love I was with him and had endless trust that he would never leave, and then he was gone in a flash one night. The happiest is, in turn, my recovery from said split. I found strength in myself and felt hope for once as I learned coping mechanics and got a psychiatrist that was worth a shit in my partial hospitalization program. What was the last new drink you discovered that was delicious? *shrug* Do you have a YouTube channel? Yes. I don't make videos anymore, though. Were you happy as a teenager? God no, my depression was awful. What do you do for your mom on Mother’s Day? Sigh. Not enough. I just tell her happy Mother's Day, give her a hug, and try to be an extra good daughter. Do you know anyone who follows a raw vegan diet and lifestyle? No. Can you go see a doctor alone or do you like to take someone with you? I can do it alone (but only have once), but I like to bring my mom with me still. Would you have sex with someone of the same gender as you? I'm bi, so. Have you ever had a concussion? One or two, I can't remember. How many dresses do you own? Zero. Do you know anyone who has a pet gecko? Yeah, my friend Summer has a darling leopard gecko. I want oneeeeee. They look so damn derpy and adorable, and their chill demeanor is something I really like in pets. Would you ever go bear hunting? No. Absolutely never. Do you prefer drawing or painting? Any particular reason why? Drawing, for sure. At least you can erase stuff, and paint is just so messy. Do you like raisins? NO THANKS MAN. Do you remember your locker combinations from high school? Nope. Do you forget to flip the page of your calendar at the start of each month? I don't have a calendar. Are you racist to any race? Nope. Have you ever intentionally hurt an animal? I've given cats and dogs a small pop on the rear, but nothing more than that. I hate doing even that, but with the language barrier and all, sometimes it's the only way to get your point across. Do you own any autographed memorabilia? No. Have you ever dated a twin? No. Oreos or Chips Ahoy? Oreos. Have you ever considered being a cop? Yeah, no thank you. What’s your favorite superhero movie? Maybe Logan. I thought it was very emotional and just overall a good movie. Name somebody you know who deserves a better life than they have: MY MOM. Name something that you’re good at but don’t like: uhhhhhhhh Name something that you’re bad at but DO like: Dancing, maybe. Which is worse: Stale chips or flat soda? Stale chips, for sure. It's certainly not my preference, but I can drink flat soda. Who’s the hottest guy and hottest girl out there? M-Mark Fischbach. :') Girl... let's seeeeee... maybe Alissa White-Gluz from Arch Enemy. GodDAMN what a WOMAN. ❤_❤ Do you ever trip over your pets? Yes, because he just looooves to follow me at my feet. What’s your relationship like with your exes? Aaron, Juan, Jason, and Tyler: nonexistent. Sara and Girt: great. What was the last thing you turned down doing? Going to my nephew's t-ball game. I always feel bad when I say no when Mom asks if I wanna go... but at least the kids know I just don't handle the heat well. Are you a party animal? Faaaaar from it, my friend. Who are you the biggest fan of? m-m-m-mMARKIPLIER You’re DJ for the night - first track to get everyone going? Uhhhh maybe "Party Hard" by Andrew W.K.? Have you ever been hit on by a pushy person? I think Juan was kinda pushy, but not to an uncomfortable degree. He respected what I felt. What accent do you find attractive? Most attractive, British. But I also really like Scottish and Irish. Also French accents in women I tend to find very beautiful-sounding. Have you ever had feelings for a friend's partner? Yes. What’s your favorite thing to do that doesn’t cost much? Drive around take pictures, maybe? Let's, uh, ignore the whole gas crisis in this answer. When in danger are you more fight or flight? Flight. Do you feel self conscious about a certain body part? *gestures to entire body* Have you been accused of being manipulative? Yes. Have you ever considered violence to solve your problem? No. Are you romantic? I personally think so. If you are a smoker, how long does a pack typically last you? If you aren’t a smoker, does anybody you are close to smoke, & if so, are you against the fact that they’re a smoker? I don't smoke. To answer the next part, yes, like my dad and stepmom. I wish they would stop so badly, like it's literally going to kill them both. Do you have more subscribers or more people that you are subscribed to? On YouTube? I'm definitely subscribed to waaay more people. Is there anything that has been drilled into your brain since you were young & you finally decided to stop listening to? How did it feel once you decided to listen to yourself over what you were told? Yes: "finish your plate." Teaching your kid to eat beyond their comfort can be very destructive, and I'm glad I never stuck to that once Mom stopped enforcing it. If you are currently in a relationship, what is one thing that seems to be unique or different about your relationship with this person, compared to other relationships in general? If you are currently single, is this more of a choice or is it more just the way things are going, not really something you chose? If you are neither “single” or officially in a relationship, what are your feelings on your current situation? I'm single, and it's just how it is. I know realistically I wouldn't tell what felt like the right person no, but it really is probably better that I stay single and keep figuring my shit out. Think of somebody famous that you have a lot of respect for. What is something that you really admire them for? To name just one thing I admire in Mark, his relentless "I'm going to do this no matter what" attitude is very inspirational to me. He lets like... n-o-t-h-i-n-g get in his way. If somebody were to leave a harsh comment on a survey you took, judging you on one of your opinions, how would you react? I'd get pretty self-conscious, just because I in general take judgment quite poorly. I obsess over "what if they're right, and you're just an idiot?". Are there any other sites you use to find surveys to take? What sites do you use? I mainly use Tumblr and LiveJournal, but in times of great desperation, I'll use Bzoink and just google surveys as well, haha. Have you sent or received any friend requests on Facebook lately? Not sent, but I got one from someone I had no mutual friends with the other day. Safe to say I declined it. Can you recall the last time you turned down an offer, of any kind? Uhhhhh no. Which fruit would you say you eat the most often? Apples. What was your pet’s last vet visit concerning? Roman has been to the vet once to get neutered (and I think shots?). I took Venus many years ago because I thought she had a respiratory infection. Thank god, she didn't. Which animals do you tend to go check out first at pet stores? The reptiles, snakes in particular. Have you ever been a victim of a house fire? No. What’s the longest you’ve ever had to wait before being seated at a restaurant? Like, over an hour. Have you ever had a cavity before? How about a root canal? A tooth pulled? Braces? Cavities and braces, yes. What is your favorite zoo animal that you would like to set free? Probably polar bears. Like especially here, it gets so hot in the summer, and the poor things sometimes only have a bit of snow in the shade. Like... they can't be very happy. Especially when you see those videos of them playing in snow, and then you think about situations like our zoo here... ugh. What kinds of artifacts fascinate you? I really think old figurines built with like clay and stuff are cool. But all artifacts I find to be very intriguing. It's so interesting to see that the desire to create has always been with us as a species. Is there anyone that you’ve visited in jail? No.

[bapydemonprincess]

Who your favorite oc? What inspires you to create the amazing characters that you do? What's your favorite au?all time Favorite fic?sorry if that's too much 👉👈

Oh my 😍 Thank you for asking these things!!!

1. I don’t really have an exact favorite, I love them all! >w< I may start focusing a lot on one over the others, but that doesn’t mean I love the others less! 

2. yrtujrytfkuyg amazing?? please I’ve seen BETTER 🙈🙈🙈 But most inspiration so far came after the ships I started shipping like Sebagni leading to the babies Aarushi and Ambrose, and Sebawolf - a VERY RARE SHIP I HOPE GETS NOTICED MORE - leading to Ulva, and Aidan coming from me and @grelleswife ‘s Sebagrellerin universe! I just LOVE these what if’s of my favorite characters possibly becoming parents and how they’d work it out! >w< THEN, with characters like Eddie and Amy, different things had to come up, like Eddie was invented thanks to a game I played called Hustle Cat, a dating sim kinda thing where the main character who kinda naturally looked like Ambrose, got to get a job at a cat cafe of all places, and got to romance one of the fellow employers! (You can find my posts on it here.) It ended up being a soft nerdy shy boi he romanced, and one thing lead to another and EDDIE was born! :3 (seriously I couldn’t take that poor boi from the dating game so I had no choice! XP ) AND WITH AMY... uh, I was just inspired for some reason by two crows squawking at each other adorably and being derpy together...🙈🙈🙈🙈 SO UM INSPIRATION FOR OCS CAN JUST... COME FROM ANYWHERE MY FRIEND! *shrugs* fuck if I know where my next oc (HOPEFULLY NOT TOO SOON DEAR GOD) will come from. XDDD

3. UM I think my most favorite au of all so far... is the sebagrellerin one... because it just combines ALL my favorite characters and they all get to be in a big ol’ polycule >w< as Grelleswife calls it. Oh and then Hannah joined them too and that added even MORE possibilities and hhhhhh 😍😍😍😍

4. Favorite fic currently is Metanoia. uwu It really gives this fandom the Sebagni we deserved all along. 🥰🥰🥰

And your questions are never too much dear! ;3

[thebulletinhamilton-quotes]

Could you do uh maybe a headcanon dump on Samuel Sea Bury x Alexander? If not then maybe one on Hamlaf? If you can thank you so much.

You’ve been so patient anon so how does both sound??? (They’re a little short so I do apologize!) thank you so much for the wait, I hope you enjoy:

Samuel Seabury x Alexander Hamilton, modern au:

Originally, they met in a classroom.

Said classroom resulted in them getting detention but you know...shamantics.

Samuel enjoys a cup of tea and a good book while Alexander enjoys an empty notebook and a cup of joe.

They do both love rainy days.

They also love cats! Oh speaking of....

Samuel (as a cat) is like that serious but derpy cat who will bop you. He (as a cat) doesn’t mind being smothered in kisses. He’s also a little naive, but just a little.

Alexander (as a cat) is a bit (no huge) of a dickish cat who will sit beside you while you cry but if you try to love him like Sammy he will 100% bitch (cat) slap you. He will also stamp his butthole on any service (your forehead included). He is very intelligent and while bore of cat activities whenever he feels like it.

Moving on....

Samuel liked to wear heavy clothes in the winter (albeit stylish).

Alexander likes to put on as many layers as possible.

He’s always stealing his ;) friend ;) scarf

Alexander and Samuel get into debates on public and on the internet.

For the longest time everyone thought they were enemies that were secretly in love.

Yet, little did they realize that ship had long left the dock.

Samuel will just hand Hamilton a sandwich whenever they have study dates. It’s mainly cause Hamilton is too busy to eat.

They currently have two cats (similar to the ones described above). Ones name is George, the other Philip.

Their one bedroom apartment is perfect cause it’s right next to the library. YES.

Alright now for hamlaf:

Met on student council in college

Hamilton yelled at everyone (especially A-Ron) during a heated debate

Lafayette literally came in and got Hamilton to not only win his proposal but agreed to not yell with the mic on.

For Alex, it was love at first sight.

Like

Help

He’s so helpless

Lafayette introduced the University President (Washington) to Hamilton

Hamilton was so nervous he kept switching up their names.

It was a little cute to watch the usual hothead be so nervous.

In terms of who kissed who first? Hmmmmm. I would say Lafayette

But Hamilton was the one who asked him out on a date..

It was kinda cute....though now to Angelica it’s annoying.

Lafayette is an awful dancer while Hamilton is an okay dancer. Alex’s toes are always bruised.

Alex and Gilbert will slip in and out of speaking English and French just to mess with people. (Mostly to mess with Lee)

When Laf’s cousin comes back from France, it causes a real rift between Ham and Gil cause Gil has to go back to finish up his studies there despite ⅔ finished with his masters.

They actually fight over it.

Do they make up?

Hmmmm...until next time I suppose.

Thank so much for the ask! I hope you enjoyed anon!

[stevewiththeweather]

caution for longass post ahead. it’s my (summer of) 6th grade sketchbook

thank you, past me, very cool

theres a fuckton of deh in here and most of it makes me want to dump a bucket of cold water on my past self’s head, so be warned

chibi harry potter. this one’s not awful

this was also back when i liked mlp. i was a derpy stan

harry potter again. this one actually looks worse in the photo because i took it at a bad angle. i liked it at the time but noted the hand was a bit small. lmao

this was also the same year i rediscovered avpm! so many things happened in that year in terms of fandoms

lauren’s draco. the one on the bottom right (the actual screenshot, not the drawing) was my profile picture for the longest time

quirrelmort. the one ship i don’t hate now because it was like. canon

this was from like. a year later also @ past me you absolutely did not

i remember angrily drawing the line across her neck because it was a “good drawing” but the neck was too long. lol

i sort of wanted to be one of those kids that drew cats. as you might be able to tell, that didn’t happen

ah yes, the precious baby bean modern!john laurens

i don’t know. something to do with pride

some elf girl

attempted redesign of elf girl from a year later. i cut it out but it says “oh god no come back in 10 months” and i think it’s been about that so challenge accepted

hmaliton

lmao very cool. on the side it says “idkkk lol”

tfw you were chosen for the constitutional convention

john laurens stacking turtles. haha turtle boi

redraw from 2019 probably. iactuallykindoflikethisjgkfjbhsdvs

you will Literally never guess who this is

ham chart. 

the top ones were drawn by a good friend.

we stan a problematic king. or something

HAMILSHARKS

expressions practice. fun fun fun

this one’s kind of good. there’s nothing too cringeworthy here so that’s a plus

foh doh doh dee doh

this is probably the best one. i used to think jared was funny hahahaaahahah g

dear evon handsin

masterpiece

sjskdfavf,,, i remember being super embarrassed of this at the time but i didn’t want to throw it away because i spent ages on it anyways rip eliza

uh.

thanks, i hate it

thanks, i really hate it. this used to be inside the plastic on the outside of the binder, which makes it even worse

ew ew ew but the backstory behind this is that my friends shipped me with jared kleinman. i drew this in response being like “nope i’m just a lesbian that fetishizes mlm relationships for some reason and also jared is gay”

haha seabury gay

haha modern!seabury gay

hahahah whatre you reading there pal

modern au kingsbury antics. what a couple

hahahahahahah more lams i drew myself and a friend poking our heads out on the side saying kinky kill me please

tried to draw a japanese schoolgirl and failed. i didn’t know references existed back then apparently

leggy best hamilton ship

modern kingsbury ref sheet

modern kingsbury ref sheet

modern kingsbury ref sheet

my friend’s old oc

vent. i shrunk it so you can’t really read it but it was all worries in the form of questions. i went back in 2019 (i guess) and highlighted the things that happened. a few more have also happened since then. i really hate the “LMAO OK Drama bitch” i wrote in 2019 though

this is from 2019 i guess. wow what a master comedian

ebon honschen

alana but shes blue daba dee daba die daba dee daba die

genderswapped gared gleinman

“nope” first of all, mood

this one was ok. modern teabury again

tried to do those aesthetic-looking doodles but ran out of Things 

piss

haha cause it’s dEER EVAN HANDSEN GEDDIT D EER HAHAGAHGSDAHJ

deer evan hansen: good edition

anxiety is so adorable amirite

angel connor. in terms of drawing alone this one’s actually not bad. also WE’RE ALMOST AT THE END

some cool badass knight princess or something

im pretty sure i stole that phrase. also look at that hair haha

i thought i was a fucking genius for coming up with this

GEORGEFAYETTE OTP ALSO WE HAVE REACHED THE END!!! PRETTY SURE ABSOLUTELY NO ONE IS GOING TO READ THROUGH THIS WHOLE THING BUT CONGRATS IF YOU DID I GUESS

[immovable-force-archive]

Twooth time bitch >=D For Kisama uhhhhhhhhh (kisamuuh) if he didn't HAVE to be doing his cop boy routine, what kind of life would he wanna live? reach for the gd stars hope you enjoy these questions being in awkward ass third person bitch AND for Kew what's his biggest regret that DOESN'T involve other people (ie killing someone, past relationships, etc)

My muse has to tell nothing but the truth for 10 asks. (1/10)

Kisama: If he didn't HAVE to be doing his cop boy routine, what kind of life would he wanna live?

“Probably livin’ in the woods somewhere,” Kisama scoffs, already hating that he had to be fully honest. “I mean, like-- if my host was a different host that didn’t give me rules to follow, y’think I’d know what to do with myself in the human world? I’d just do the same shit I did in the Realm of the Dead. Probably get on those Bigfoot shows. Probably kill a few more people, I dunno. I was stupid back then, who knows what I would’a done if somethin’ didn’t force me in line?”

Kew: What's his biggest regret that DOESN'T involve other people? (I.E. killing someone, past relationships, etc.)

“...” He stares blankly for awhile, like a fish in a fishtank or a certain derpy cat. “That doesn’t...? Uh... I don’t... think I have any?” Blink blink. “Why would I regret shit if no one was around to see it? Or, like-- I didn’t lose anyone ‘cause of it? Is this a human thing?” Guess humans have more shit to lose than devils did. Not like Kew had a house, or pets, or whatever. 

“I don’t think this counts, but I kinda had a mental breakdown when I was little. Like, I don’t remember a lot of it, I just went on this killing spree, ‘cause that’s all I knew how to do without my parents. Lasted, uh... I dunno. A long time. I don’t really regret it ‘cause I killed a lot of devils, it’s just because I let myself get that weak, y’know?” Although, it’s not like he chose to go crazy, so there’s not much to regret...

[izumi-mikki]

10 Husbandos Tag

I was tagged by @captdrobvious​

RULES : Post your top 10 husbandos in no particular order, fictional or real. Tag ten friends to do the same.

I tried to kinda put them in order? Under a cut cuz they’re big images lol

Izumi Mitsuki (iDOLiSH7) I mean idk what anybody was expecting. I love this boy with all my heart. He’s my reminder to work hard and never give up. I love the manly shotas apparently. I love him being the straight man and also when he dotes on Iori. Plus he’s versatile. Most of the time he’s cute, but sometimes--especially when Tanemura draws him he gets to look really hot and handsome?? He’s super emotional and I adore him for that. 

Tenn Kujo (iDOLiSH7) I realized that I went from one boy who feels imperfect/inferior to one who is known for perfection. So uh. Idk what that says about me. Ugh I love Tenn and that’s all I can say about him. I mean look at him. Does anybody remember that pic I posted of him from his photobook with the cats and glasses? Really, that’s all you gotta do to get me. Wear glasses and love cats. BUT TENN IS ALSO SUPER HOT AND COOL SO. I love his little princely devil character. 

Natsuki Hanae (seiyuu) If you’ve been around for awhile you know that I love this man. I probs heard him somewhere before, but I know I really started getting into him when I got into B-project (He’s Yuuta). But like...I adore his voice. He can be cute, but also soothing and sexy? Also pervy? Or pervy jokes? Plus he’s a huge dork. He spams his twitter with pics of his derpy cat all the time??? HE PLAYS MONSTER HUNTER. He and his wife are so sweet and she’s potentially as dorky as he is?? Ugh she’s so lucky. 

Souma Saito (seiyuu) Well, part of the reason why I love Tenn is because of his voice. So deep and smooth. HOT. He’s cute and fluffy. His hairstyle seems very unique to me?? Idk like you could pick him out of a crowd by his hair. Lmao. I also aspire to be as comfy-looking in my fashion as he does. He’s almost always wearing an oversized sweater it seems like. Also, he’s said that his only exercise is walking from bookstore to bookstore cause he reads so much. Boy is a bookworm and general intellectual and I find that extremely attractive. Do you wanna fall for him too? Read this article: [CLICK]

Akane Fudo (B-Project) TBH I don’t know a whole lot about him since KiLLER KiNG wasn’t featured in the anime and I didn’t stick around for too long to learn much about them in the game. But I love his voice and he’s cute like a monkey. Plus I love guys who clip their hair back. Idk if it’s an actual hobby of his or something he did for a feature but I think he does judo or some sort of martial arts? He’s also apparently a bit of a perv despite his face too. Lmao what’s up with me. 

Yuuta Ashu (B-Project) Well...Hanae Natsuki. He’s excitable and tall and is the peacekeeper between Goushi and Kento. There’s also something I really love about the fact that even though he doesn’t seem particularly interested and is cutesy he understands “adult” topics. I mean especially since he’s dealing with Kento. 

Goushi Kaneshiro (B-Project) I’m still hella surprised that Kento got away with taking this picture. But uh. I guess outside of the cutesy characters Goushi is my fave. The tsundere. And I love the fact that he’s so serious about his music. Also, he puts up with Kento and Yuuta’s antics. Just THRIVE. I love THRIVE. 

Syo Kurusu (UtaPri) Like I said earlier, manly shotas. Hiro Shimono’s voice is one of my faves. Plus Syo is blond, fashionable, and wears a lot of pink. All faves. I would really like to play the UtaPri games and learn his story at some point. 

Alm (Fire Emblem: Echoes) HELLO AGAIN IT’S HANAE NATSUKI. I didn’t know that was his Japanese VA when I decided I love this boy. It just made me love him more. Can’t remember his story too much right now, but I just remember loving how down-to-Earth he was and how he brought all his friends together. Plus I adored the fact that he’s not oblivious. Tho it’s hard to be oblivious with the level of Faye’s thirst orz. Like in most cases when you have an obvious crush like that a lot of male characters just don’t get it, but Alm acknowledges it and knows how to reject her kindly but firmly. 

Zac Efron (actor) I guess there had to be one American on here somewhere. He’s hot. And he has a nice butt. It’s mostly about his butt tbh. 

I’m not gonna tag anybody cause most of the people I would’ve tagged have been tagged already anyways lol. But if you wanna do this, go ahead. And tag me in it so I can check it out. 

Can you tell I was starting to lose interest towards the end? lol I’m surprised I made it. 

[mellowely]

I FOUND A THING

sooo I found this thing and i LOVE filling these thigns out for some reason??? anyway, here ya go! something you peeps didn’t ask for! ~crush~ pffttt, my boyfriend XD

~middle name~ jevon, Josephine. Yes..I got 2

~eye color~ Very dark brown it's basically black

~last time I cried~ er...well fuck..can't remember honestly

.~biggest fear~ spiders ;-; though if If i have to pick something other than that...being stranded in the ocean...fuck the ocean.

~last song I listened to~ Two feet - Feel like i'm drownng..ironically..though since i had to go back in my playlist..Panic room by Au/Ra

~last person I txted~ meh bitch pan.duh, XD

~favorite sports team~ err...I don't like sports? but in football I always go for the giants..cause..New York

~favorite color~ I have alot but honestly its Teal and Blu

e~best friend~ well...I used to have best friends but idk anymore..they kinda just ignore me now. So um..pan.duh, cause they have yet to ignore me to

.~favorite celeb~ EDEN. I mean, techincally he isn't a celebrity..YET! OwO, nah but his music is amazing

!~have any scars?~ er..yeah alot tbh. Mainly cause I used to have 5 cats so well. I mean..cats and flesh? ya gonna get a scar at some point XD

~kissed anyone~ Nope! No one OwO..not in a romantic way atleast.

~someone I hate~ Er...my first ever boyfriend? AND TRUMP! FUCK TRUMP!

~Ever done drugs~ well. yeah tbh. but nothign bad had an edible once..they fuckin suck. don't eat them, tastes like chemicals. And i've drank a bit. I really like vodka, preferably vanilla vodka

~height~ last time I check? which was like a year ago? I was 5'9" but um. im pretty sure i'm about 6' now. I'm a tall bitch -3- XD

~are you currently happy?~ well uh..kinda? It really depends. Im making jokes to make up for feeling pretty shitty..so..idk tbh

~do you drink~

well, yes and no. It depends. If its a special accation and i'm not like.. not allowed?? I'll drink some, but never enough to get drunk.

~the last think I bought/ate~ Homemade from scratch..er...shortbread cookies!..though they tasted like sugar cookies, also last thing I bought? food..like a week or 2 ago?..or 3? can't remember.

~day or night~ day, I hate the dark like...its ok sometimes...when its really pretty..but...generally i start to get hella paranoid at night

~favorite lyric~ oh gosh imma have to go with EDEN song and hmm..."'Cause all I needed was some words to say That all these feelings don't mean shit to me 'Cause it's all just chemicals anyway, anyway, yeah"

Its uh..there's more lines..i love this chunk of the song though XD

~do you give second chances?~ yes actually I do, 2 chances 3 strikes.

~pet peeve~ ooohhh..fuck..um..EMOJI'S! I FUCKING HATE EMOJI'S! start off a conversation with an emoji and i automatically hate you...depends on the emoji tho, there are a select few I actually..don't hate

~random fact~ uuuhh fuck uuum..idk...give me a min. Everything is a taco ...let it sink in

~current mood~ uhhh..derpy? confused? yeah i'm confused. generally with life

~last book I read~ FUCK. I don't reaadd anymoreee..does it have to be like...a book book? oh.oh holy shit..ok so a manga is  abook? but it was online? and it was like...a fucked up one? i'm not gonna say the name cause well i forget but it was a reference steven universe made with the fuckin..like..kindergarded. thats all imma say cause that show CREEPS ME OUT AT THAT ONE EPISODE

~jealous type~ nop-.....ok yeah, i'm not really..jealous? but i can be possesive?? in a way? but i don't be like. "OH YOU CAN'T BE WITH THEM!" i just kinda keep it to myself and let ya do you. though im gettign better at it!!

~birthday~ December 27, 1998

~obsession~ ooooooo....uh...COFFEE. i kinda got out of that obsession but now its come back..tho..i got to stop it again..its fuckin up my stomach....so..BROCCLI! i fuckin love Broccli

~favorite song~ theres...theres alot so lemme think of a song i can't get tired of...ok its between Drugs by EDEN or Ready as i'll ever be...by the show tangled...yeh

~worst mistake~ ooh..um...uh?...idk?...i don- MY FIRST BOYFRIEND. FUCK HIM. He's a dick. thats all i can think of that wont make me start contemplating life.

~someone I trust~ pan.duh. i mean, yeah i trust my boyfriend to..but...panduh.

~do you believe in love?~ erm...idk??..like..i believe that yes you can fall in love but i believe it doesn't last long...i mean..hopefully it does! but..idk..its a bit of a like..i don't believe the person you are with will ALWAYS love you no matter what..adn thats a sad thought but i mean...eh. its confusing.

~are you okay?~ uh...yeah? kinda? not really but i try to be! thats what counts right?

----------- Blank ~crush~

~middle name~

~eye color~

~last time I cried~

~biggest fear~

~last song I listened to~

~last person I txted~

~favorite sports team~

~favorite color~

~best friend~

~favorite celeb~

~have any scars?~

~kissed anyone~

~someone I hate~

~Ever done drugs~

~height~

~are you currently happy?~

~do you drink~

~the last think I bought/ate~

~day or night~

~favorite lyric~

~do you give second chances?~

~pet peeve~

~random fact~

~current mood~

~last book I read~

~jealous type~

~birthday~

~obsession~

~favorite song~

~worst mistake~

~someone I trust~

~do you believe in love?~

~are you okay?~

[catvalium]

“30″ questions tag (aka the holy shit i cant believe someone tagged me for something post) but i did like 25...sorry

answer some questions and tag blogs you’d like to get to know!

1. gender/pronouns (+ sexuality): uhhh i like she or they and bi

2. nickname: namewise im down for anything ill put some ive used in the tags...

3. star sign: taurus

4. height: 5′8

5. time: 5:23 pm but imagine more like 11pm with the amount of darkness

6. birthday: april 28th woohoo

7. fav bands songs: my music taste is all over the place honestly, so ill just give you guys a couple songs (not a music expert or anything i just like these currently haha)

uh rn its rendezvous girl by santigold, E.V.O.L and sex yeah! by marina and the diamonds, tongues by joywave, mess around by cage the elephant, help im alive by metric, little dark age by MGMT, where is my mind? by pixies, 911 by tyler the creator, best friend by foster the people, survive by the moog, mama’s gun by glass animals, and i bet on losing dogs by mitski. 

8. song stuck in my head rn: well im listening to music now but while i was out it was on top by the killers

9. last movie i watched: thor ragnarok!! i saw it with my little brother and it was p fucking good

10. when did i make my blog: 2014ish i think??? way different back then, real character development i think

11. what types of things do i post: random shit that i like. helps pass the time

12. last thing i googled: floating person pose reference

13. do i have other blogs: yeah i have an art blog over at @xlymn (nothing great just stuff in my sketchbook that i post for some fucking reason idk)

14. do i get asks: rarely but those that i do get really do make me happy <3

15. why did i choose my url: its kinda in the name man, i like cats and i have some issues

16. following blogs: around 300ish

17. followers: 207 

18. fav colors: blues and silvers

19. average hours of sleep: 7 or 8 on a good day, 4 or 5 on most bad days

20. lucky number: 10

21. what am i wearing right now: tank top and jeans 

22. how many blankets to sleep with: i have a comforter which is just the fucking best, but on especially cold nights i have a second fleecy blanket i stick in the middle

23. dream job: if im really dreaming something with art if it paid, but if im being more practical i wanna do something in the medical field and maybe work with animals...idk

24. fav food: god i love gooey chocolate chip cookies like that are warm and shit!! 

25. fav drink: water when im really thirsty. and i also love milk, chai, and Thai tea

thanks to @wallowlakemonster for tagging me this was cool to do and i really love ur blog too btw <3 you seem super sweet

here some mutuals id like to tag @derpy-alexia @spookyforthebirds @grasshoppy @ojakue @sourapplesoda @deoxity

@miami-moonrise @matthewmara @voiidtastic  you guys all seem cool and do with this as you will/fill it out if u wanna 

[rantsaboutponies]

My Little Pony: The Movie

Yes, this is the 2017 one I’m talking about. I’m not going to pull a switcheroo and review the 1986 one. Like I said, bad title.

If you want to read along while watching the movie, you may do so as long as you’re not in a theater. DO NOT LOOK AT YOUR PHONE IN THE THEATER. I don’t care if you turned the brightness down or if you hold it in your lap; EVERYONE CAN STILL SEE IT. YOU’RE BEING AN ASSHOLE.

Anyway, on with the review! Spoilers abound, so fair warning!

Oh, and this movie is rated PG for “mild action”. What the hell is wrong with you, MPAA?

Good lord, the absolute grandiosity of the title logo... All right, all right, I’m not going to nitpick something as minor as the logo. Calm down.

My thought process: “Hey, this synth bit sounds kinda like the intro to ‘We Got the Beat’ by The Go-Go’s. I wonder if they realize that.”

Two seconds later: “OH, FUCK, IT IS. IT IS THAT SONG. NO. STOP. STOP RIGHT NOW. RRRRRGGGGGHHHH.”

Well, THAT threw me for a loop! Holy shit, am I glad the show’s budget isn’t large enough to include covers of popular songs.

Ah, we’re showcasing the new animation with a flyover/through of Canterlot. I’m not going to be mentioning the animation quality every other paragraph (even though I could), so instead I’ll just say everything up front. I mentioned in an earlier post that it looked like the animators were suddenly unaware of how to use the program, as though they had all traded jobs or something. It turns out that wasn’t far off! According to sources, the animation software being used on this movie is Toon Boom Harmony, not Flash, so the animators working on this movie are either 1. the same animators using an unfamiliar program, or 2. different animators who are used to working with Harmony but are not used to animating this show. And if you look at the stuff they’ve worked on, they’re all either just 2D (The Simpsons, The Congress) or just 3D (The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water), not anything that has attempted to integrate both. The opening shot of the ponies flying through the clouds and through Canterlot looks like 2D assets trying to move through a 3D environment! It doesn’t help that the 3D assets (like the buildings and the landscape) are all really, really cheap-looking, like they were resources saved from a movie from 10-20 years ago and never updated. Also, the 3D assets tend to move fluidly (like 3D assets do), whereas the 2D assets attached to the same figure move with a lower framerate (like 2D assets do), which is a little jarring.

And holy crap, look at those two characters walk towards the screen! That’s some first-year animation student work right there!

Okay, okay, I said I wasn’t going to harp on the animation the whole time. Fine. Instead, here’s a complaint I’m sure will sound familiar to regular readers: Wow, you really like your exposition dumps right out of the gate, don’t you, writers? Except this time, you don’t have the excuse of “Well, we only had 22 minutes, so we had to get all the information out there quickly!” This movie is 99 minutes long! That’s four-and-a-half times the length! At this point, it’s just sloppy!

Random pony: Princess Twilight is great under pressure!

Twilight: Oh, my goodness, I can’t handle this!

Trombone: Wah-wah!

Oh, goddamnit, are we bringing back the wah-wah jokes? Son of a...

GAH! That closeup shot of Twilight is just creepy! Adding more details just because you’re closer to a subject isn’t always the best idea!

“What’chu talkin’ ‘bout?” FUCK STOP FUCK STOP FUCK STOP FUCK

Still creepy! Why do her eyes look like that? This is unsettling! Please stop focusing on her face!

Ha, Pinkie Pie was blowing a balloon into the camera, and then she turned and revealed it’s actually a really long balloon, but we couldn’t see that because of the angle we were watching from! Ha ha ha! ...Was...was that meant to be a joke? Because I really can’t figure out what other reason you would have to show it that way. These new animators are bizarre.

Oh, hey, she was making Discord! He’s not actually in the movie, but, you know, fanservice!

All right, Angel dressed as a parrot made me chuckle, but why the hell would Fluttershy force him to do that?

“Faster if I do my Sonic Rainboom!” How? How would that help you complete this task any faster? What sense does that make? Oh, wait, don’t tell me...fanservice.

“Raised in a barn!” Yes, thank you. You have beaten that joke thoroughly into the ground by now. Please move on.

Ah, good, Pinkie Pie is continuing her trend of being loud, irritating, and making things worse by opening her stupid face. Some things haven’t changed.

Okay, this is two songs in the first eight minutes. Just how many are there?

“Eeyup!” HE SAID IT.

Yeah, you can show me Cheese Sandwich all you want. I know “Weird Al” isn’t in this movie.

Security guard #1: “Do you have visual on the buttercream?”

Security guard #2: “Visual confirmed, go for cleanup.”

...

Audience: *cough*

I mean, they left in a pause for laughter and everything. They were expecting that to get a laugh.

Balloon: *gets squished*

Random background pony: Bryan! Noooooo!

Me: 

I don’t...I’m not...are these...jokes? I’m...I...

You’d think they’d have heard of this villain. He seems like he has a wide sphere of influence.

“There’s one of you! And hundreds of us!” Yes, Luna, I’m sure they brought that giant airship because there’s only one of them. This is why you’re not in charge.

Wow, the, uh...the crystals forming over Cadence are, um...am I allowed to say anything more about the animation?

DURR HURR IT’S FUNNY BECAUSE THEY THOUGHT THEY GOT TWILIGHT BUT IT WAS ACTUALLY DERPY AND ANYTHING INVOLVING DERPY IS FUNNY. FAAAAAAANSERRRRRRVIIIIIIIIIICE.

Every word out of this minion’s mouth makes me want to punch him. It’s Michael Peña’s best role since CHiPs! Apparently he ad-libbed most of his dialogue. It shows.

“Yay.” SHE SAID IT.

“Boingy boingy boingy boingy!” UGH.

Pinkie Pie: “Anypony up for a game of I Spy?”

Everypony else: “UGH.”

See? SEE?! I’m not the only one! She’s even starting to annoy the other main characters by this point! What are you even doing?

So Tempest got...a phone call...except it’s not a phone call, it’s a potion that you pour into a brazier...but it still has a ringtone...and it sounds like a dial-up connection... How do they use it more than once? Also, FUCK YOU WITH YOUR STUPID FUCKING

Why does the Storm King’s emblem look like the Starcraft II logo?

“Sorry, bad spell service.” FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Meanwhile, in the town from Assassin’s Creed...

“Hmm. Interesting.” Well, I know someone who’s getting a lot of furry fetish fanart made of him!

“I’ll take the picture of your sister!” Heh. Okay, movie. That’s two.

Wow, Taye Diggs’s voice does not fit that character design.

“...parts will fall off.” Did the guy immediately grab for his crotch when he said that? Wow, movie! Where’s your PG for “mild rude humor”?

Someone should tell the animators that Spike isn’t pursuing Rarity anymore. Since, like, Season 2.

Oh, god, don’t sing! I was kind of starting to like you, Capper! This doesn’t really seem in-character!

Why does it seem like this character would have been Discord if they hadn’t “redeemed” him like three times by this point?

Yes, Fluttershy is afraid of bats. Great knowledge of the character there, movie.

“Ooh! So many fun breakables!” Fuck you, Pinkie.

Good lord, Emily Blunt really could be intimidating if she weren’t undercut by Michael Peña at every fucking TURN! It’s the slugs from Epic all over again!

Yes, “The Girl from Ipanema”. A common song all throughout Equestria or the Badlands or whatever. The random popular songs interspersed throughout a movie (based on a show that does not HAVE them) that also has its own original songs really do not fit! They really don’t! Just because you can afford it now doesn’t mean you have to do it.

“WAIT!” *random cat noise* That...might have made sense if you didn’t play those two sounds at the same time. I’m not sure how he could talk and yowl simultaneously. Come on, sound editors.

Boy, how convenient that Tempest found them at that exact point, huh?

Y’know, showing Pinkie Pie grinning like an idiot as they’re all running for their lives doesn’t exactly endear me to her, animators.

Oh, no! Pinkie fell! What a tragedy! Maybe if you let her die, she wouldn’t keep fucking up your shit!

GOD, I HATE THIS FUCKING MINION.

Bird Guy: “We scar ‘em...”

Rarity: *gasp*

Bird Guy: “...emotionally!”

Fluttershy: *cries*

Pff... All right, you got me! That one was actually worth an audible laugh! That makes you three for...I don’t know, fifty?

I have a serious question. Was this supposed to be released in 3D, but then they dropped that for some reason? There seems to be a lot of “stuff coming straight toward the camera” action.

Are we seriously still doing the “people trying to kill each other stop when the shift whistle blows” joke? That was old 50 years ago!

I’m not sure I’ve seen a musical with songs this...out of nowhere. I mean, I’m sure worse examples exist, but none that I’m familiar with.

Are these pirates supposed to be...giant parrots (because, y’know, pirates and parrots)? Why does this world have giant parrots? Everything in the entire series is the size it is in the real world. Including the parrots we saw earlier in the movie! Why giant parrots?

Ah, good, Rainbow Dash is still a FUCKING IDIOT. Glad you’re keeping that change from the show, too!

So let me get this straight. Storm King is concerned about projecting an image of fearsomeness and strength...but he sells bobbleheads of himself as merchandise? You know, you don’t have to be this stupid, movie! You don’t! You really don’t!

GOD, they need to stop showing closeups of their faces. THEY’RE. SO. CREEPY.

“Oh, this is inteeeeeense!” WELL, IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN IF YOU HADN’T SAID THAT. LET A MOMENT LAND, MOVIE. LET. A MOMENT. FUCKING. LAND.

Oh, good, here’s where that terrifying shot from the trailer comes in.

And Rarity stopped to look at herself in the mirror while falling to her death. HURR HURR HURR.

Oh, look! Pinkie is about to get them killed again! GET RID OF HER.

“That’s it! I simply cannot even!” Oh, fuck off. Whoever wrote that line, fuck off.

“I hate epic adventures!” I’m sure starting to.

Wow, Twilight, you held your breath for, like, 10 seconds. Good job.

Well, here it is. We knew it was coming. Seaponies. Honestly, even though I should be annoyed (because FANSERVICE), they actually fit this world pretty well (way better than giant anthropomorphic cats or whatever the hell the inhabitants of that Badlands city were).

But then they turn the Mane Six into seaponies.

And I’m reminded of “The Crystal Empire (Part 2)”.

And you only introduced these characters to sell new toys of the Mane Six, didn’t you?

And fuck you.

“Yay.” SHE SAID IT. AGAIN.

Don’t sing. Please don’t sing. I think what makes these songs even more out-of-nowhere is the fact that all the other non-pony characters are immediately in on the song, no matter how they were feeling or what they were doing right before it started.

Um...Twilight’s not wrong, you guys! Everyone you’ve come across so far has tried to fuck you over! Including the seaponies! Why wouldn’t she just try to steal the thing?

But, of course, she wouldn’t get captured if everyone else didn’t leave her all alone to mark the act break. The rest of them are even seen sitting on a gray and dismal seashore afterwards! Jesus Christ, it’s like all the tropes from Scriptwriting for Children’s Movies 101 are in this thing! You are allowed to try harder than this, you know!

Twilight: Why are you doing this? You’re a pony, like me!

Me: I’m nothing like you!

Tempest: I’m nothing like you!

Me: Come on!

Oh, god, don’t sing. I can hear the lead-in. I can see you want to express your emotions and fill in your backstory so badly! Please don’t! Please don’t please don’t please don’t AGGGGGHHHHH

Man, I bet when the Ursa Major scratched her face, Tempest bled so! Ha! ...I’m sorry.

Are you kidding me? She has the same character motivation as Starlight Glimmer? Her friends (all two of them) left her in one particular incident, so now she’s sworn off friendship forever (instead of just, I don’t know, finding new friends? You had to have had more than two.)

Hold on, did Tempest...beam that flashback into Twilight’s head? Because otherwise, I don’t know how she would have gathered that information.

“Well, look what the cat dragged in! Himself!” Um...burn?

NO. BULLSHIT. HOW DID THEY ESCAPE? HOW? IT DOESN’T COUNT IF YOU DON’T SHOW IT. WHY WOULD YOU CUT OUT A POTENTIALLY AWESOME ACTION SCENE FOR THIS SHIT? NO. FUCK YOU.

Then again, there are only five pirates left. I guess the rest were slaughtered.

Honestly, the Storm King just looks like Tirek. They might as well have reused him.

Boy, I haven’t seen Liev Schreiber play such an nonthreatening villain since X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Blast from the past! I’m glad he’s been in the movie so much up to this point so that I actually give a shit about him being the main bad guy for the last 20 minutes!

Uh-huh. And where were the other two pirates hiding? Only three jumped out of that cake.

The guard was taken down by...cupcakes. Do you even care anymore?

HOLY FUCK PINKIE’S FACE IS TERRIFYING. NEVER SHOW ANYTHING LIKE THAT AGAIN. YOU ARE SERIOUSLY GOING TO GIVE CHILDREN NIGHTMARES.

And he’s using Spike like a flamethrower. He can’t...oh, whatever.

Why does she even need her horn restored? She seems pretty powerful as she is.

“Why are you saving me?” “Because this is what friends do.” No, this is what decent fucking people do! if you’re about to watch someone die and you can do something to prevent it, you don’t have to be their friend to do so! You just have to be not a sociopath!

Oh, no! Twilight flew off with the main villain! She’s dead for sure! Oh, what? She’s not? What a shock. Nice heavy-handed angelic imagery, by the way.

Couldn’t she have blasted the XBOX rock out of the way or grabbed it or something instead of letting it hit her?

“So...now what?” “Now we rebuild.” No, wait, that’s the ending from San Andreas. A much better movie, I might add.

OH, THE FIRST ONE THEY DECALCIFIED WAS DERPY. EVERYTHING IS DERPY. DERPY DERPY DERPY.

Okay, who the hell was the “Way to go, guys!” pony? That was very obviously supposed to be someone specific, but I am unaware of this behind-the-scenes tidbit.

So they unfroze everypony, but they still didn’t fix Tempest’s horn? What a bunch of dicks!

“You know, your horn is pretty powerful, just like the pony it belongs to.” Didn’t I say that? What the hell was the conflict here?

That’s what you end the movie on, eh? Pinkie Pie’s squealing? Okey dokey then.

AND DERPY’S IN THE CREDITS TOO HERF DERF WERF LERF

And, of course, no kids’ movie would be complete without LUKAS GRAAAAAAAHAM.

Wait, Rachel Platten sang that cover of “We Got the Beat”? The singer who gave us “Fight Song”? Well, no wonder it sucked!

Rating: 1/4 stars.

This movie had a review embargo on it on Rotten Tomatoes until the release date. That’s never a good sign.

I think maybe they thought that, by making the movie darker, it would make it more suitable for theatrical viewing. It doesn’t. It’s just...odd. Especially when they add really stupid jokes to lighten the tone.

I can say that you can probably see the movie without having seen the show, which is a positive. There aren’t any plot details that require outside information to understand, but WOW is there enough fanservice if that’s what you’re looking for. In fact, it might be better if you haven’t seen the show because boy, oh, boy, do they introduce a lot of characters that the ponies on the show would definitely be aware of if this made any sense. On that note, if this is set in the canon Equestria from the show, then holy shit are the ponies the most callous and/or oblivious sociopaths I’ve ever seen in a children’s program. Not only are they all apparently completely unaware of the fact that everything outside of Equestria is complete shit (aside from the fact that everywhere seems to be impoverished, they’re all totally oblivious to the fact that the Storm King has taken over THE REST OF THE WORLD), but they don’t actually fix that by the end! I guess the hippogriffs can come out of hiding now, and the Storm King’s faceless henchmen all seem to be good guys at the end since they’re all at the party, but for all we know, the badlands are still inhabited entirely by goblin monster things and their shady black market shit! We never saw what happened to them! And if the parrots are now all pirates instead of merchants, does that mean they’re going to start robbing everyone? Congratulations, Rainbow Dash! You’ve significantly increased the amount of crime across the entire world! Good job, you fucking idiot!

Twilight is ridiculously selfish, which is really odd considering we know she knows better by this point. Her moral in this movie is that she has to learn to rely on her friends and not just try to do everything based on her own effort and ideas. Y’know, AGAIN. How many fucking times has Twilight had to learn this lesson over and over and over again? And people say that Fluttershy’s episodes are repetitive.

I was hoping that at some point I would become used to the animation. For comparison, Fantastic Mr. Fox has a really ugly animation style, but you don’t really think anything of it after the first 20-30 minutes. That never happened with this movie. Every time I thought I was getting used to the animation style, someone would turn or move or make a face, and it would just look creepy or just plain awful again.

You know what’s kind of sad, though? Emily Blunt is really good in this. She’s really putting in a lot of effort for this character, and the design is pretty good, too! She’s actually kind of awesome, especially compared to Liev Schreiber (who so could not have given less of a shit about his role) and Michael Fucking Peña, who are just terrible. Even if I didn’t entirely understand her nonsensical motivation, Tempest was honestly the best part of the movie.

Boy, between this and Leap!, if an animated movie advertises that it “features an original song by Sia”, run!

[stitchwitchsapprentice]

Fullmetal Alchemist Liveblog Ep. 13

Fullmetal Alchemist Ep. 13: Fullmetal vs. Flame

lol I almost typed Fullmental instead.

Colonel Sarcasm lol

Aww, Ed! You scared Al! Poor baby!

Or was he doing some sort of alchemical trickery?

Daww! There's a puppy! And why is this guy afraid of it? Also, I like this guy who is basically a robot? "It is a dog, canine mammal, scientific name is..."

Can Ed and Al please adopt a puppy? Please, please, please?!?!? I mean c'mon! He needs a famwy! and loot at dat wittle faaace! How could you say no?!?

Dubbing "dogs are tasty, especially these plump ones." Subtitles: "dogs are tasty, especially these red ones." uh... the dog is black?

DAWWW!!! There is a cat!!! Can Ed and Al also adopt a cat?!?!? please please please pretty please?!?!?! It can be like that Grimm's fairytale where the two brothers keep adopting animals until they have a whole menagerie that trails along after them!!

Also, giant suit of armor holding tiny kitten is toooo cute.

lol, giant suit of armor to tiny boy "I hate you! You're not even human!"

Hurm. Could Marcoh secretly be their dad? Their dad is going to show up somewhere, okay?!

That's a lot of alchemists.

OMG! Daddy is back with his pictures to his baby! His obsession is so adorable!! [cue me doing an anime-style flail of emotion]

So... is Ed going to suggest he goes on a mission to track down the deserter Marcoh and bring him back?

Upsides to being a giant suit of armor #35: lots of places to hide a kitten

Oh great. Assessments. That crossed my mind when Tucker mentioned it, but I kinda forgot about it since then. I guess they were banking on that.

Okay, now I want Ed to lose the battle, just so he has to adopt the cat. Because that would be hilarious. Of course, it would be okay if ended up with the dog instead. But why not both? Brothers traveling with a menagerie of animals!!

"come on, there's no way they'll let me fight a teenager!" *cut to* "how interesting! This should definitely happen."

Ah, now I see his endgame. He wants all the power.

Okay, the miniskirt thing was just... a little out of tone or something. Like, really? okay, whatever, moving on

Thank you so much for having Lt. Col. Dad MC this battle. Thank you, Fullmetal Alchemist, thank you.

Did you just say corner? Did you not notice that this is a circle? Circles don't have corners.

AL holding on to Ed while he tries to attack the entire audience for joking about his height. Oh, Ed. Derpy cat is just extra.

lol "what's your strategy?" "punch him in the face!" Ed sounds like a barbarian in D&D

OMG. The sparklies around the colonel during the fight.

"nah nah nah nah nah nah I tore your glove!" *pulls out other glove*

Okay, so this is kind of a military state. That's why people don't like the military and perhaps why the English translation specifically chose the word "fuhrer" (It's used in the subtitle and the dubbing at this point)

Wut?! She just fired a gun at the puppy?! I agree with the guy who wanted to find him a home. What's wrong with all you people?! (Also, poor guy. He just wanted someone to care for the wittle puppy and wuv him)

"That Cornello guy still seems to be there. Do you think you should send Ed in to investigate." No. That sounds like a decidely bad idea.

Okay, actually, Mustang is being kind of nice here and breaking my heart!

Ah, the alchemist killer

Okay, this was a sillier episode than usual, and it loses points for Ed not keeping the cat XD

Predictions:

Ed is going to go looking for Marcoh

Lt. Col. Dad is going to adopt the cat? And have pictures of his daughter playing with her kitty next time Ed sees him (Please please please? Because that would be adorable!)

Lust and her gang are trying to get this civil war started, but not sure why...

Ed and Al will eventually catch up to their dad... the meeting will not be all they'd hoped it to be

Questions:

Ed-transmutation circle-blah blah-etc.

More backstory pls? Like... how did the military state develop? Why does Lust want to start a civil war? (or is she just Evil)

Who is the Alchemist Killer? (Or more accurately, how and why did he get that arm? Lol the arm reminds me of Shadwell's finger in Good Omens)

Did Ed and Al's dad leave because of the all the violence? Did he switch sides and decide that the fuhrer is in the wrong?