#op your mind is just š¤š¾š¤š¾š¤š¾
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ā what's going on down there?: a dick analysis
į„«į” featuring :: jake sully, miles quaritch & norm spellman
į„«į” includes :: their human forms + avatar forms
į„«į” genre :: mature
į„«į” content warnings :: talking about dicks obviously, explicit sexual content (?), humor lol
į„«į” note :: if you know anything about arachine, you know i love a good dick analysis. these posts are intended for comedic purposes only, which means theyāre not to be taken seriously.
ā jake āima slut you outā sully
. . . human form .*+!
ā³Ā length: as we all know, jakeās life on earth was very unfulfilling. he was a man who sacrificed his legs for the fate of the country, only to be disposed of into the unforgiving hands of society, with no way to reap the benefits (or lack thereof) that veterans were promised to receive. and after losing the privilege of mobility, his body changed drastically. he got smaller, his body got weaker, and yet, one thing remainedāthat dick! jake is a survivor, through and throughāhis personal motto is: if it aināt broken, then itās still workingāand boy, he does not disappoint when it comes to the downstairs department. standing tall at 7 inches, is little jake (maybe not so little). when flaccid, his length measures at a solid 5.7 inches. definitely a grower.Ā
ā³Ā width: a little bit on the skinnier side, but he knows how to use it and thatās all that matters!
ā³Ā color: i think for the most part, his shaft definitely matches the rest of his body; though, i can see it maybe being slightly a little more darker at the base, like a very light beige. when heās flaccid, his tip is a pretty pink, almost like a ballet slipper (aka the best pink). turns into an angry red when fully erect!
ā³Ā extra:
01. groomed?: jake pegs me as the kinda guy who doesnāt really care? i mean, trimming isnāt foreign to him, because he has trimmed it before, and does so when he notices itās gotten to be too longā¦but, i donāt think itās something that he does often. to him, itās just hair. heās on his grown man shit, you know?Ā
02. curved?: uhm, yes! you know that one beyoncĆ© lyric? yeah.Ā
03. any veins?: absolutely covered in āem
04. how he fucks with it: iād like to think before his accident, he was a doggy style connoisseurācome on, itās jake weāre talking about here. canāt nobody tell me otherwise! i just know he had bitches bent over, weaves sweated out, makeup all over the pillowsā¦mans was f-u-c-k-i-n-g okay? fuckingggg.Ā
. . . avatar form .*+!
ā³Ā length: the masses may attack me, but itās time i spoke up. the man has a monster schlong. a cooter cat killer, if you will. if you thought his human form was big, shit, you aināt seen nothing yet! completely flaccid, his cock measures to about 10 inches. when fully hard, he grows an additional three! talk about impressiveā¦
ā³Ā width: so thick that it basically slaps his thighs when he walks. the man could create a beat with it, get em into the soundcloud business now!
ā³Ā color: self explanatory tbh, itās fucking blue. as blue as papa smurfās ass.Ā
ā³Ā extra:Ā
01. groomed?: iām gonna go out on a limb here and say that because heās an avatar, he grows hair there. even if iām wrong, iām right. i donāt give a damn what james cameron says. heās basically my character at this point, and i will him to have hair damnit! justā¦the idea of him having a full bush down there, in the wild, all primitive and shitā¦does something to me. idk. donāt ask me why iām so nasty, blame my deadbeat father.Ā
02. curved?: is a banana yellow? thereās your answer.Ā
03. any veins?: i might have a brain aneurysm just thinking about it, but yes! god, yes. so manyā¦so, so, so many. ribbed for her pleasure or whatever trojan said.Ā
04. how he fucks with it: is he still the doggy style connoisseur? yes. but now thatās got the strength of 20 men, backshots sound a whole lot like gunshots now. they say every time the mighty toruk makto thrusts into a cunt, a tree falls down or something. so, yes. fucks hard, fucks rough, fucks like heās on a mission. whatās that one tik tok audio? ārest in peace to all the soldiers that died in the service, i dive in her cervix.ā yeah, he lives by that.Ā
ā miles āon your knees, cadet!ā quaritch
. . . human form .*+!
ā³Ā length: just gonna cut right to the chase. heās huge. like pussy splitting huge. i donāt care what anyone says, you can argue with ya friend, you can argue with ya mother, but you cannot argue with me! coming in at a solid 6 when flaccid, quaritch takes the cake for the biggest cock on this list (at least, human form wise). at full length, he measures to about 7.8 inches!Ā
āboooooā you say, well, guess what? itās the truth, and iām just the messenger. whether you hate him or love him, heās just that guy.Ā
ā³Ā width: surprisingly average. but itās okay, sometimes you canāt have the best of both worlds.Ā
ā³Ā color: if my memory serves me right, he was pretty tan in the first movie. so, iām gonna stick with that and say that itās a pretty tan that transitions into a pale pink. i donāt know if some of you have seen old dick, but their tips get less saturated with age. itās a phenomenon (not really, the blood flow to the groin is just a lot slower, which can make it appear kind of greāanyway, i digress!)
ā³Ā extra:Ā
01. groomed?: this man is a colonel, so heās all about discipline and keeping things nice and tidy. so, obviously, his hygiene reflects that. i donāt think he goes completely bald, but he does give it a good trim. kind of like a fadeā¦just imagine a patch of grey, prickly hair. yeah.Ā
02. curved?: yes, and since heās older, itās probably curved a lot. you could probably hang something on it. maybe a towel, or a lanyard. itās definitely useful for something!
03. any veins?: god, i donāt know why, but i have it in my head that heās on steroids. heās just so buff and strong, and i mean, yeah, he could just be really fitā¦but he could also be a self-image obsessed freak who takes drugs to be the perfect soldier. the correlation, you ask? well, i just feel like people who take steroids are really veiny, and i feel like his dick would be really, really veiny. so, thus the rant about steroids. steroid dick.Ā
04. how he fucks with it: donāt let his age fool you. he may very well be pushing his late fifties, but heās still a young man at heartāand heās definitely got the sex drive to prove it! i can see his favorite position being something like missionary. not so much because he enjoys the intimacy of it (like being face to face), but more so because heās got a size kinkāand definitely a dacryphilia kink. he enjoys seeing his partners cry, whether in pain, or in pleasure, or both! so, when youāre fucking him, donāt expect anything romantic. he just wants to see your pretty little face all teary eyed and pathetic.Ā
. . . avatar form .*+!
ā³Ā length: so big you can see it from space; thatās how the RDA mfs know theyāre close, because they can see the tip protruding from pandora. no, but seriously, itās still really huge. like maybe 12-14 inchesāmaximum.Ā
ā³Ā width: probably twice as thick as a humanās forearm. and god, itās sooooo heavy. big breeding balls to match.Ā
ā³Ā color: blue blue blueā¦like wet fun dip. with just as many stripes as the american flag or whatever.Ā
ā³Ā extra:Ā
01. groomed?: yes, but the hair is black instead of grey and itās probably really straight because naāvi hair is straight as fuck.Ā
02. curved?: sir, yes sir.Ā
03. any veins?: whatād i say? steroid dick. but even worse (better) now bc heās so damn tall, he needs all the blood he can get down there.
04. how he fucks with it: has you in all types of positions. his favorites are anything that shows off his new found strength, so iām betting on full nelsons and mating presses. just fast, powerful strokes. lives by the motto: canāt stop, wonāt stop.
ā norm āwhatās the sq root of 69?ā spellman
. . . human form .*+!
ā³Ā length: iām sorry to disappoint the norm fuckers (if there are any), but heās not that big. when heās soft, his cock measures to about 4.8 inches, and at most, 6.2 inches when hard.Ā
ā³Ā width: skinny dick.Ā
ā³Ā color: dawg heās so white, itās like hella pale and the tip is so pink that when heās aroused, it looks like thereās something wrong.
ā³Ā extra:
01. groomed?: like jake, i donāt think he really cares.
02. curved?: straight like a pencil
03. any veins?: like two, and theyāre really prominent because heās so fucking pale.
04. how he fucks with it: i donāt think human norm is getting puss, letās be real.Ā
. . . avatar form .*+!
ā³Ā length: i am a firm believer in N.W.B.Cānerds with big cocks. itās just the universeās way of saying thank you, they justā¦they just do so much for us, you know? norm may not have been packing down there in his human form, but this was his second chance at redemption. heās now a proud member of N.W.B.C, sporting an impressive 15 inches. you know that one scene in the first spider-man when peteās looking at himself in the mirror and he looks inside his briefs? yeah, that was norm when he found out. the man got so excited, he accidentally catapulted a scientist out of pandoraās atmosphere with the weight of his cock. joking.Ā
ā³Ā width: on the skinnier side but still toe curling, nonetheless.
ā³Ā color: laffy taffy blue, with little (big) blueberry balls.
ā³Ā extra:
01. groomed?: no, heās too busy in the lab and getting naāvi puss.
02. curved?: unfortunately no
03. any veins?: more than before, which he was pleasantly surprised to see.
04. how he fucks with it: normās got a big dick, but he acts so shy, like heās scared of it or something. like stop playing boy and drop them drawls, the fuck? anyway, i think normās a sub. he pegs me as the type of guy who likes strong women, women whoāll tell him to shut the fuck up (because he talks so much) and eat their pussies. i guess this makes him a munch. yeah, heās a munch. ice spice actually wrote that song with him in mind!
Ā© arachine 2023
#i'm cryinggg#this was hilarious š#op your mind is just š¤š¾š¤š¾š¤š¾#let's run a tra- š#jake sully headcanons#miles quaritch headcanons#norm spellman headcanons#jake sully x reader#miles quaritch x reader#norm spellman x reader#dick analysis
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this is kind of a spoiler?? i hope you donāt mind this and you completely donāt have to answer it!!! i got into one piece because your drawings and fics about op men are just š¤š¾ *chefās kiss* BUTTTTT i stopped because you knowwwww ace and i just havenāt been able to watch it because it broke my little heart but going back and re-reading your fics has given me the strength again! just thank you for being so patient and passionate with your work! and thank you for taking the time out to read this! i hope you enjoy your day or night! love you! š©·
BROOOO whenever people tell me they started OP/started liking geto because of my art or writings I CRY UR AMAZING WWOOWWOWW
thank u so much for telling me this my love!:)))
made my night love u more babe thank u!!!!š©·š©·š©·š©·š«š«š«
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