#ooc: he still has the bean sneaker he just doesn’t know what to do with it

[askchilchuck]

Skibiti toilet? Yes or no

Back again already, huh? I still have no idea what that means. Also, why did you give me a shoe with beans in it…?

[dolokhcv-blog]

TITLE: I Think I Loaf You  PAIRING: Connor Murphy/Evan Hansen (with some side Alana Beck/Zoe Murphy) WORD COUNT: 2527 SUMMARY: Connor tags along to his sister’s wedding cake tasting and happens upon the most awkward, adorable baker in existence. NOTES: I just really love The Great British Baking Show, and this is what happened. Also, a pretty soft Connor/a little ooc, but he’s also gone through some positive change, so yay? Sorry about the title. You can also read this on Ao3 here.

Connor wasn’t at all sure how he got roped into this shit, but there he was, being dragged along by his sister for a wedding cake tasting. He knew that if this was six years ago she could have held a gun to his head and he still wouldn’t have agreed to come along, but, well, they’d come a long way. Such a long way that he was apparently willing to suffer through all this pre-wedding decision making, and that she actually asked him to in the first place.

Whatever. At least he’d get to eat.

“This place is great, Connor. And Marie is so nice! You’ll love her.” Zoe paused, as if she immediately remembered that this was her brother she was talking to, and amended. “You’ll love the cake.”

“Not a high bar to reach,” Connor replied with a snort as he reached for the door, letting his sister in first. The gesture was less out of politeness and more out of lack of desire to be greeted by whatever customer service smile was waiting for them on the other side of the door.

But when they stepped inside, they were surprised to find that no one was there. He knew Zoe had made an appointment – with a fiancée like Alana, being organized as fuck was in the job description – so the two of them looked at each other, uncertain.

“Um, Marie?” Zoe finally called out. There was the sound of something clanging and a crash, then a stuttered curse, before someone emerged from the back of the building.

And fuck, if he wasn’t the cutest goddamn loser Connor had ever laid eyes on.

First of all, he was covered in flour. And not even in the way that bakers sometimes are after working with it, like patches and light dustings over everything they were wearing. No, he was covered, like he’d just laid face-down in it and proceeded to snow-angel. His face, though, was free of the stuff for the most part, just a dusting over his nose and left cheek. He wore a dumb blue striped polo under a black apron, jeans, and some nerdy-ass sneakers.

Connor wondered if it was too forward to ask for his number before they even tasted any cakes and was about to decide that he didn’t care when the man finally spoke.

“Uh, hi! Hi, welcome, hello. Greetings.” He laughed nervously, awkwardly. “Sorry. That was weird. Um, you must be here for the cake tasting. You’re early? I mean, not that it’s a problem, it’s totally fine, early bird gets the worm and everything, I just wasn’t expecting you for another three and a half minutes so I thought I still had time to make sure that everything was perfect but you’re here! That’s great? Really…” He paused and sucked in a breath, like he’d forgotten he’d needed oxygen until that moment. “Great.”

Connor and Zoe exchanged a look, but while Zoe’s read much more as what the fuck is going on, Connor’s said, If this boy is straight, I will stare sullenly out the window the whole car ride back to my apartment.

“Hi,” Zoe said, finally shooting a (slightly unsure) smile at the man. “We are here for the cake tasting, yes. Um, we were kind of expecting Marie?”

“Right! Yeah, right, of course you were. Well she’s at some convention for bakers or something and left me here? To deal with customers? Well not deal with, but like, you know, talk to, but I’m not that good at it, as you can probably tell.” He suddenly turned very red and tugged on the hem of his t-shirt. “Oh, God, I haven’t even introduced myself yet, oh my god, I’m really bad at this, I don’t usually work with, uh, people. Clearly. Anyway, I’m Evan? Evan Hansen?”

The poor guy didn’t even sound sure of his own name, voice going higher at the end like he was asking a question. Connor didn’t just think he was cute anymore; now he was getting weird feelings in the pit of his stomach, like he wanted to shield this guy – Evan Hansen – from the world. Keep him safe in a cocoon of blankets with a mug of tea or some shit. It was unsettling.

“Nice to meet you, Evan. I’m Zoe, and this is Connor,” Zoe replied gently, as if too harsh a tone was going to break the other man. Judging by the way he was acting, it just might’ve. “Sorry if us being... a little early threw you off. We just wanted to be punctual.”

Connor snorted at the ‘we’, earning a look from his sister and a slight expression of surprise from Evan.

“Oh, no, it’s fine! I mean, it did throw me off, but everything’s done, so it’s not too bad. I’ve got it all plated and everything so if you want to just take a seat over at that table?” He gestured to the cozy table in the corner. “I can bring all the flavors out to you! I made a lot of different ones so you’d have choices, but y’know, if you know you don’t like a flavor, you obviously don’t have to try it. I’d never force cake down your throat or anything. Ha ha!” The laugh came out more as him actually saying ha-ha rather than laughing, and Evan turned a deeper shade of red. “Wow, that sounded creepy, I promise I’m not a cake-murderer, I’m not going to poison you or anything. I -- God, okay, I’m just gonna get the cakes, I’m so sorry.”

He hurried off into the back again as Connor and Zoe took their seats.

Zoe kept her voice low as she spoke, and Connor dipped his head closer to hear her. “Well, he’s an... interesting guy. Seems sweet, though.”

“Cute,” Connor said instantly, making his sister roll her eyes but then brighten.

“Y’know, it’d be nice if you had a date to the wedding. I know stuff with the family tends to freak you out, so it’d be good to have someone to distract you.”

It was Connor’s turn to roll his eyes. Normally, he’d shut her down when she tried to set him up, but... well. It would be nice to have a date to the wedding so he could ignore Larry and Cynthia. Or, at the very least, prove that he wasn’t a total fuck up anymore to them and extended family. “One step at a time, Zoe.”

Zoe looked incredibly pleased, but before she could respond, Evan reappeared with two trays. He set them very carefully on the table, and Connor had to guess that there was at least one instance where cakes he was holding ended up on the floor. “Okay, so, like I said, lots of flavors. Fifteen, to be exact. The most popular is the red velvet with the cream cheese icing and the white with the raspberry filling. I love the dark chocolate with the champagne filling. Marble cake is pretty basic, and so is the white with vanilla bean frosting, but there’s nothing wrong with a classic! If you want to go more out of the box, I make this Victoria sponge with blackberry compote. And it’s pretty good, not to brag. But, yeah! Go ahead and try it!”

Connor couldn’t help noticing there was minimal stuttering and an assuredness in his tone that wasn’t there before when he talked about his baking, and it was... nice. It was nice when people got to talk about the stuff they loved with confidence, and Evan clearly loved baking.

So, yeah, Connor and Zoe did eat, with Evan nervously watching and commenting as they went through the different flavors. Eventually, they settled on a top five that Alana would come back and try the next week.

“I think we’re going to narrow it down to the blackberry, tiramisu, dark chocolate champagne, and white chocolate raspberry,” Zoe announced, resting a hand over her full stomach. “My fiancée will be in next week to try them so we can make a final decision.”

Evan suddenly looked perplexed, eyes shifting between the two of them. “Wait, I thought... So you’re not... going to get married?”

Connor barked out a laugh out at that, though immediately regretted it when he saw Evan jump in surprise. “Ah, no,” he replied, realizing that this was the first time he’d spoken directly to Evan since they’d arrived. Maybe he was more nervous than he thought. “Illegal in most places, and pretty fucking gross. She’s my sister.”

Evan turned bright red and looked at Connor for a moment too long before staring at his feet. “Oh, God, I’m so sorry, that was definitely presumptuous of me especially now that I can definitely see the resemblance. Oh my god, that’s mortifying, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Connor said quickly, smiling in a way he hoped was non-threatening. “I can see how you’d get there.”

Zoe looked between them and apparently decided that this was the perfect moment to give them alone time, after Evan thought they were getting married and proceeded to feel mortified. “Um, I’m going to go call Alana and make sure she doesn’t absolutely hate any of the flavors we picked. I’ll be right back.”

She disappeared out of the shop, and Connor took the opportunity to stand up and look into the display case at the front. “Did you bake all of these? They look... impressive,” he said, eyes resting on a perfect-looking tarte au citron.

“Uh, yeah. Thank you? I do most of the baking now. Marie has arthritis so it’s harder for her, which is kinda why I took over.”

“Wow,” Connor said, a little lamely. “Uh, that was really nice of you.”

He glanced over to see Evan flushed and focusing hard on cleaning up the table where they’d been sitting. “Oh, no, it’s not a big deal, really. I really like doing the baking, and I don’t mind getting up early. Besides, it usually means I can stay in the back and just go, y’know, be with my dough. Which, god, sounds so lame when I say it like that, it even rhymed, I’m sorry, I just usually don’t interact with customers, for obvious reasons. Which I said already, God, I’m like a broken record, I’m sorry.”

It looked as if it took a concentrated effort for him to quiet himself, and by the time he had, Connor was looking at him with a raised eyebrow and a fond smile. When the fuck had he started smiling fondly? The thing was, Connor kind of got this guy. It wasn’t like he was free from mental health problems himself, even though he’d made a significant amount of progress in the last five years. Though where Evan seemed to deal with his fears and overthinking by retreating into himself and rambling, Connor tended to deal with it by lashing out at anything he perceived as the slightest poke. It was a miracle that he’d ever been able to reassemble his relationship with Zoe and his parents (though that was still a mess) after everything, but he had. Even still, though, he could understand where this painfully awkward boy was coming from.

“Listen, Evan,” Connor began, taking a step towards the man in question. He seemed to tense up when Connor got closer, so Connor stopped where he stood. He didn’t want to encroach on Evan’s space. “Sorry, I don’t mean to -- Sorry. It’s just, I was wondering if I could get your number?”

Evan looked a little terrified, and Connor wondered if he was trying to think of the best way to let him down in that undoubtedly overworked brain of his. “It’s okay if the answer is no. I won’t, like, throw a chair or yell or force my sister to take her business elsewhere or anything. Just thought I’d ask, while we’ve got a minute alone.”

“Nonono, that’s not, no...” Evan said immediately, though he seemed a little unsure of where to go from there. He hesitated. “I’d love to give you my number. I just, uh, don’t know why you’d want it? I don’t mean to question your motives or anything, I just want to know why you’d want it. I mean, if you have any questions about the cakes you can call the bakery’s number, you don’t need my personal cell, but I guess if you have questions in the middle of the night we’ll definitely be closed but --”

“I think you’re cute,” Connor said, cutting Evan off. He knew it was rude, but this kid was working himself up over nothing, and Connor wanted to save him from it. “Very, very cute. And if you’re interested, I would really like to see you again.” His sister would be proud of him for expressing himself, he knew, so he was really fucking glad she wasn’t there to see it.

Evan fiddled with his apron, but he looked a little less nervous. A smile seemed to tug at the corner of his lips, and Connor felt a little relieved. Evan’s anxiety was louder, but it didn’t mean Connor didn’t have some of his own. “Um, okay. Yeah, that sounds... Great. Yeah. Also, you’re... I think you’re c-cute, too.” He looked like he wanted to say more, but he seemed to clamp his mouth shut before he could.

Connor grinned as he fished out his phone, and Evan quietly rattled off his number. He’d just finished saying the last digit when Zoe came back in. Not wanting to see an overly pleased grin from his sister, Connor quickly put his phone back in his pocket. Evan noticed this and glanced at Connor’s face before looking back at the ground.

“Alana’s going to come in next Thursday to try everything,” Zoe announced, one hand gripping the strap of her purse. “Anyway, we should get going. Thanks so much for all the delicious cake, Evan.”

She smiled and turned, giving Connor the chance to smirk at Evan and give a little two-fingered salute. Evan grinned shyly back.

Once they were back in the car, Zoe pulled out of the parking lot and glanced over at him. “So?”

“So what?” Connor asked, pulling his phone out of his pocket.

“Are you going to see him again? Did you flirt? Did you get his number?”

Connor rolled his eyes. “I’m not as smooth as you seem to think, Zoe,” he replied, which wasn’t a total lie, but also didn’t quite answer the question.

Either his sister didn’t catch this, she didn’t care enough to interrogate him further, or she knew he didn’t want to talk about it, because she dropped the subject. It didn’t really matter; Connor was busy typing out a text message.

Rye can’t I stop thinking about you? Sincerely, Connor Murphy

Evan didn’t text back until later that night, either because he was working or because he didn’t know what to say. But when he did finally text back, it was three blushing, smiling emojis, proving to Connor that Evan Hansen really was the most charming goddamn mess that ever existed.