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blakescoven · 5 years ago

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You Decided That I Was Worth Saving | 1 |

Pairing: Sojourn!Michael Langdon x fem!Reader

Chapter One (1): “As I Lay Dying”

Summary: You were driving home from work, when something – or rather someone – literally got in the way. Against any reason, you let him into your life. Michael would make you question your entire worldview. Were your paths meant to cross? Did you two meet by accident? By fate? Or there’s an evil force behind it, scheming and plotting with a devilish purpose?

Warnings: car crash(!), mention of injuries, different POVs, some swearing

Word count: 4.7K

A/N: Hey lovely friends! Here’s a sort of Sojourn AU-ish, since the plot starts in that particular moment of Michael’s life. Still don’t know if I’ll include witches and satanists…we’ll see. It’s gonna be a series so I guess I’ll divide it into a few chapters. I loooove angst and slow burn, so I’m sorry but there’s no smut. Yet. Also, for this chapter, I took inspiration from: the scene of Elena’s car crash from 1x11 of TVD and a song, my fav of all times, that I listened to while I was writing this chapter and that is also the song playing in Y/N’s car; Apocalypse by Cigarettes After Sex. Okay, that’s it. Enjoy and thank you so much for reading it, despite the grammar mistakes (my apologies) and the fact that probably it really sucks. (‘WHAT AM I DOING?’ was the mood while I was writing it tho.) Anyway, love you and please, let me know what do you think and what I can improve!! I’d really appreciate any FEEDBACK!! I kinda need it, because I’m not sure I’m doing this right. THANK YOU xxx ♥

You've always thought you could describe your whole existence with a wide range of adjectives, but 'adventurous' wasn't one of them for sure. At least, that's what you thought 30 minutes before the event that would have changed your life forever. Nothing would ever be the same again; just like a hurricane comes and goes, so that day, and the following ones, would have drastically rocked your world. And mostly your beliefs.

It was late. But you were used to it. You had recently got a new job, which allowed you to move out and finally get your own place, the smallest rentable apartment on Earth. Or in Los Angeles, no doubt. This was the most stressful moment since you were born, it was up to you taking care of your own now. Mommy and daddy no more.

Shifts were endless and you often found yourself staying late at the office, to finish what you've started. This new routine was already messing with your biological clock. Every single night, you looked forward to going back home, eat and fall apart on your bed. Even today, you were already savoring the anticipation of your sadly-glorious homecoming; you were dying for a relaxing hot bath and a slice of pizza. But who are we kidding, right? A whole pizza. Then, sleepiness permitting, you would have watched your favorite TV show petting your cat. A real party girl, uh? Well, that was your life now.

You have just finished college and this was the first experience as an independent person. At the very beginning, it has been hard leaving your parents' house, but soon you realized it was time for you to go on your own way. You were so full of dreams and expectations. You hoped to achieve great goals. Of course, what you haven't taken into account was that your future weekends wouldn't have been under the banner of fun, alcohol, and friends. But instead, your crazy Saturday nights consisted of you kneeled in front of the washing machine, hands in your head and a YouTube DIY video for dummies playing on your phone, which explained all the ways to get the laundry started and what products must have been used. All your life has become a huge dumb Netflix comedy. More like a parody, perhaps. You hung out with your friends less and less; you felt deeply guilty about that, but you were way too tired to make up for it.

As mentioned before, it was a late Friday night. It was raining, pretty hard. You were driving your beloved brand-new car (THE much-demanded graduation gift) and 'surprisingly' you hit traffic. At 9 fucking p.m. TGIF, they said. Sure. Your friends were definitely having fun and drinking in some random club by then.

You, on the contrary, were running out of patience; your shiny Lexus had not moved an inch in 10 minutes, so as soon as you could, you took a highway exit. That was supposed to be a kind of shortcut, according to the navigator. The pouring rain and the cadenced motion of the windscreen wipers sounded like a lullaby. A slow-core song started playing in the background. It was quite soothing and maybe, on second thought, you should have to turn it off…or had coffee before leaving.

You could feel your eyelids getting heavier and heavier, the exhaustion slowly prevailing. Trying so hard to keep your eyes open, that they've started burning; and not to miss anything, you got a bit of a headache accompanied by a soon-to-be-wrinkle frown.

Meanwhile, you were driving down a deserted one-lane road, going a little over the speed limit in your rush, in order to make it home as soon as possible. The wheels were slipping a little on the wet pavement, but you kept the car steady. You peered through the front window trying to see what was ahead of you; it was pitch black outside, with not even one dammit lamppost; only the moon's pale light absorbed by the dark green leaves of the forest beside the road. You had no idea where you actually were.

Suddenly, the annoying metallic voice of the GPS started bullshitting about recalculating a new route. "Wait what? Fuck NO NO NO…come on! You stupid thing, why are you changing direction???" you maddeningly screamed, looking at the display and trying to change the settings with your right hand. You weren't exactly paying particular attention to the road ahead. Huge mistake.

Outside the windshield, the rain was coming down in torrents, blurring your vision even more. The wipers went back and forth, attempting to clear away the large droplets clinging to the glass, but it seemed they weren't moving fast enough.

As if the universe had something big in store for you, right at that moment, something – or rather someone – came out of the dense vegetation, slowly limping while crossing the street, no concern for surroundings.

Your eyes were still glued to the GPS tracking your position; but all of a sudden, your distraction was abruptly erased when you caught a glimpse of a human shape in the middle of the road, illuminated by the car's headlights.

A goddamn person.

You had perhaps three-quarters of a second to register this.

You didn't realize it until it was too late. You couldn't have stopped all this now. The blood drained from your face. It all happened in a few seconds, but the moment seemed to last forever. The shock made you tense your muscles; your heart skipped a beat and your eyes suddenly widened. There was a scream coming from within that forced its way from your mouth as if your terrified soul has set a demon free. It was the kind of scream that makes the blood run cold.

With adrenaline flowing through your system, you slammed on the brakes. Your fists clenched with white knuckles around the steering wheel, immediately swerving to avoid the crash. Somehow you managed to not run over him, but you were going too fast to stop.

Your car rolled over and over, while clips of your life flashing like a slideshow. The vehicle has flipped so many times that you started drifting in and out of consciousness. The noise of the metal being bashed over the asphalt was deafening. When it finally stopped, you were stuck in your seat upside-down, coughing up pieces of the broken glass coming from the shattered windshield.

Then everything became still.

You could only hear the sound of rain on metal. Aware of the bloody taste in your mouth, you still weren't able to figure out if you were injured, because the seatbelt tugged on your chest was too painful. Heart pounding in your ears, you tried to scream for help, but it came out more like a gasp.

Meanwhile, the young man was still paralyzed to the spot in the middle of the road, like an unfamiliar force was holding him in a tightening grip, keeping him from leaving. For a moment he believed that that must have been another hallucinated vision. Then he slowly turned his head toward the wrecked car. An odd thought came across his mind: the driver crashed in order to not run over him. But why? Humanity had failed him so many times. He had lost the only one that truly cared about him. His Father had abandoned him and he wasn't able to understand what was his purpose, not anymore. He actually knew that a car was coming that way, but now he honestly didn't give a damn about his life. He had failed. He was utterly lost. This was the best coincidence possible to put an end to his suffering. But now, he felt something he couldn't explain, almost a need, the need to go and check if the driver was okay. Still confused about this new foreign impulse, he started to walk towards your car.

Once there, he kneeled and took a look inside, from the broken side window.

"You look stuck." he commented with an apparent childish but plain voice.

If you weren't, like literally, in that position, you'd have certainly sassed back to that dumb obvious statement. But your conditions weren't the best at all, you might have some broken bones, actually.

What, instead, came out from your mouth was stammering confused words.

"I-I-It… m-my… my s-s-sea..b-be..t" you tried to speak, holding and shaking the restraining belt tightly in your hands, while tears gathering in your eyes.

He hummed and shushed you. "Let me get you out of here." he whispered, thinking again about why he was actually doing this, it was none of his business. And yet, he stayed on.

"I want you to put your hands on the roof." You were about to obey his calming demand, but in that moment, you realized your left arm had to be broken and it hurt like hell. So somehow you managed to raise only the other one and take also your phone.

Then he closed his eyes for a couple of seconds and all of a sudden, the seatbelt mysteriously unhooked, as if by magic or an invisible force. But you were too rattled to think about it.

You fell and he gently grabbed and lifted you from the car.

"I got you." he smiled, holding you in his arms while standing up. "Are you okay? Can you stand? Is anything broken?" he questioned with a caring honeyed tone.

You nodded pointing your arm and moaning, still dizzy from the car flipping over. The stranger carefully set you on your feet, yet not letting you completely. Good, because immediately after you slipped, too weak to stand, but he caught you by the waist. Your head was spinning so fast.

"Hey hey, easy, don't force yourself, you're clearly not okay." he observed "Look at me." and he placed his thumb on your lower lip and chin to hold your head steady as he spoke. What was he feeling right now? Pity? Concern maybe? He thought he had already turned off those pointless human emotions.

You tiredly opened your eyes to meet the most beautiful pair of ocean eyes you've ever seen. Unfortunately, you couldn't focus on him any longer, neither when he run his hand down your water-stained cheek.

"Hey stay with me, don't close your eyes." he urged, just as your vision went fuzzy and your eyes rolled back. Within seconds everything went black.

You passed out into complete and utter darkness.

He caught you before you hit the concrete, gathering your limp body into his arms and walking away from the car. He abruptly stopped. What he was supposed to do now? He had literally come from the woods, after days of fasting and sleeplessness. He was covered in damn dirt. Not to mention that he had no place to go. He was too exhausted to reason. So he chose to gently lower you to the ground, kneeling, so half of your body was on his lap. He stroked your wet hair, wondering what to do with you. Just right now, looking at your face, he noticed how beautiful you were, how innocent and angelic. He swallowed and smiled. A soft side? In his evil and corrupted soul? Impossible.

It was still raining. You were both soaked and there was no shelter in the proximities. He thought he couldn't do anything more. That's when he remembered about your broken arm. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, placing his hands above your head. Nothing. Maybe he wasn't focused enough. He took your hands in his own and tried again. This time his eyes rolled black until they showed only a white surface; then he started to mutter Latin words. He lifted his head up speaking louder, but his nose began to bleed, until his vision blurred and the car suddenly exploded. He lost consciousness right next to you, nevertheless his hand still on yours.

The next thing you knew, you were on your back on the ground and very disoriented. Also completely drenched. Making indistinguishable noises because of the pain, you turned your head resting on the asphalt. The rain in your eyes didn't let you have a clear view of the surroundings, but you immediately felt an extremely warm presence at your side. You blinked twice and finally saw the boy that had helped you, laying there unconscious. Hell, maybe you had hit him with your car after all. The plot thickens.

Saying that you were confused about the whole situation was an euphemism. There was nothing for it but to try to reach your phone, almost five feet apart from your leg, hoping that it didn't break in the crash. Despite the acute ache in your arm and the burning cuts and wounds, you were able to crawl back to it, so you dialed the number and called 911. You explained everything and asked for help with a wisp of voice. You probably had a concussion.

The rain eventually stopped. You were starting to feel cold, so you found your way back to the stranger. Little droplets of water drenched his hair, covering his features, and you couldn't help yourself, you brushed a few strands from his face, caressing his sharp cheekbone. Right after your head started spinning and your vision filled with white spots, until you fainted again, against the stranger's chest.

You woke up in a hospital bed. It was early in the morning; the sunlight was peeking through the blinds, the constant beeping of monitors echoing throughout the room. You sighed loudly and squinted with a grimace. Luckily you were just a little sore, nothing too serious. You took a look at your arm: you had a pretty unaesthetic cast. The universe's way of telling you, "Here, take this you little bitch." Amazing.

You got up very slowly and entered the bathroom, looking for a mirror to better check out your wounds.

"Wow, nice Halloween make-up though." you muttered rolling your eyes. You had a stitched cut on your left upper forehead, a split lip and dark circles under your puffy eyes. A Miss Universe at her peak. Not to mention a great number of bruises all over your body.

You called your parents shortly afterward. Downplaying the details of the accident wasn't enough, they completely lost their minds at the phone. They were shocked and worried about your conditions, so they insisted to get on the first flight to LA, to help you. You reassured them you were fine and ready to go home. It wasn't necessary for them to come. They even offered to pay for a new car, since yours was, sadly, destroyed. You refused though; you would have dealt with the car-issue later. Even though you couldn't still get over the fact that your precious SUV has gone for good.

A truly kind doctor got to your room and, after having checked out vitals and injuries, refreshed your memory about what happened last night. Shoot! In that moment you realized you had totally forgot about the boy. You immediately asked the doc if you could go visit him. He nodded but not without first warning you. John Doe here had to be sedated because, when he regained consciousness in the ambulance, he had refused to go to the hospital and started thrashing around. Luckily, he was too weak to harm anyone.

The doctor kept saying that they had found no ID, nothing that could tell them where he came from. He was completely dehydrated in addition to previous wounds. He probably hadn't eaten for days either. For these reasons, the cheap version of Derek Shepherd wasn't sure whether he should call the police.

You were listening to his words with much more concern you thought you could feel. Well, maybe because you had almost run over him. But you felt you had to go check on him. He helped you out of the car after all. He…saved you someway? What you couldn't understand was why he had stopped in the middle of the road; he hadn't even tried to get out of the way…Oh shit. Was there any chance he wanted to, like, get killed? No, c'mon, there are way too many other – and less-painful – "methods" to do it…It couldn't be.

When you arrived in his room, you immediately noticed he was tied to the bed and carefully, you set his wrists free. After a few seconds, he woke up. You tried not to pay attention, but he was undoubtedly attractive. To be honest he was much more than that. Handsome to say the least. He seemed almost angelic. Baby blue eyes piercing your soul with a magnetic gaze, golden messy curls spread around his head on the pillow like a halo and God-given sharp features. Despite that, he was still covered in filth and wounds. But even in such a miserable state, he was hypnotizing. You wondered why no nurse took care of him yet.

"Hi!" you whispered, sitting down on the nearest chair.

"Hi." he said back, almost imperceptibly. "Thank you" he added, pointing at his bruised wrists.

"I should be the one saying 'thank you'..." you stated; he gave you a half-smile, "…you literally saved my life."

"No need to thank me, I caused your crash so.." he stopped for a second "…we can say you saved me instead." he admitted heavy-heartedly, with his eyes down. He seemed so sad and so lost, and you really felt for him.

"Well, thank God we're both still alive!" you didn't know what to say anymore. And this cringy comment wasn't helping.

" Sure " he scoffed.

What were those, tear-stains? Has he been crying?

Then an awkward silence filled the room. You were starting to feel a bit uneasy, and the continuous biting your lower lip – despite the cut on the upper one – made it absolutely obvious. You could feel something was off about him. The sadness and despair in his eyes were pretty noticeable, and you were the kind of person that can't look away.

"Uhm, are you okay?"

"Yes" he was still staring at the void. No emotion showed.

"Sorry, I don't want to be pushy…but it's clear you're not."

"Why do you care? What do you want from me?" he snapped turning his head, but his face softened instantly, as if he regretted the outburst.

You honestly didn't know why you cared that much either. It was an odd sensation coming from your guts, it was pulling you so deeply into him. He needed help, and you wanted to give it to him.

"You got anybody I could call? Your relatives or a friend?" was the only answer you could articulate.

" No.. " he mumbled, "..I have no one."

Suddenly, you felt the urge to ask him if he wanted to go home with you, to recover. You would have never done – or even thought – anything like that before. This was against all the good bits of advice your mum ever gave you. Like, don't invite in strangers that could easily kill you in your sleep?! But it was as if, deep down, you knew you could trust him. You took the risk.

"Listen.. ahem.. y-you could come home with me. I have enough space in my apartment and we could help each other until you'll feel better" you paused.

He was staring at you now, with glistening eyes. He was speechless. No one has ever shown him selfless kindness. He was in disbelief.

"I don't want your pity."

"No, wait. This isn't pity. In case you haven't notice, I have this lil problem here" you chuckled, swaying your cast in the air "I wouldn't mind a hand" you said to release the tension.

"I-I can't. Please, go. Just leave me alone." he shook his head. The fear of being abandoned or rejected again was too overwhelming for him to open up and accept some help.

"Oh," you whispered, a bit down in the dumps, "got it."

You headed for the door, but before leaving, you turned one more time "I'll leave my number to the receptionist in the hallway, in case you change your mind." you winked and smiled, leaving him alone.

He sighed and slammed his head against the pillow; he didn't even have a phone, also because, come on, what good it would do? But above all, what kind of paradox was that? Him, the motherfucking Devil's spawn, needing help? From an innocent little soul like you? No kidding. He had performed a human sacrifice and eaten raw hearts for fuck's sake. Yes, he may not know what to do, and probably he had made mistakes, but it wasn't over yet; his satanic plan needed to be adjusted. This way, he would eventually recreate the world in his Father's image and earn his trust again.

He needed to leave as soon as possible, before some stupid human being started asking him though questions.

You were finally home. The entire Uber ride had been silent and for that you mentally thanked the driver, because you weren't in the mood to talk at all.

As soon as you turned the doorknob, your little friend immediately greeted you purring, making you jump. He really missed you…or at least that's what he wanted you to believe. You locked the door behind you.

"His Majesty is hungry, uh?!" you said mocking your furball "Yeah, me too dude...but hold on a little longer, I need to take a shower I smell like hospital, jeez."

Only now you noticed. There was a rather unusual atmosphere when you walked in, an unsettling silence sending shivers down your spine. An inexplicable heat radiating from the house itself. It was too hot in there and you're positive it wasn't normal in the middle of November. The room seemed saturated with unfamiliar vibes.

You went to your bedroom and started to undress. Then you entered the bathroom, ready to finally wash the last night events off you.

Odd. It was like you could feel eyes on you, all the time.

Whatever. You were too worn-out to indulge your paranoid thoughts.

But the same feelings still followed you, even later when you were eating your delivered dinner, half-dead on the couch with the fluffy monster curled up on your lap.

"Maybe it's a sort of twisted PTSD." you told yourself. Yet your heart wouldn't settle. Something wasn't right there.

Anyway, you chose to ignore your instinct; it was time to get ready for bed. You reached your closet as you slowly took off hoodie and sweatpants, changing into even more comfortable clothes, just a t-shirt actually. Since it was that hot, no pants. The loose garment barely covered your bare thighs though.

You were half asleep when your cat jumped up and suddenly rushed out of your bedroom like he was possessed. You stretched and changed position, that enormous cast wouldn't let you fall fully asleep. After 5 minutes of turning and tossing you heard what sounded like footsteps. Your pulse started racing.

"It's nothing," you told yourself, "I'm imagining things."

But then the typical creaking of your fridge being opened reached up to your room. Twice.

You froze, heart in your throat. You were most definitely not alone. Someone was in the house.

But right after you shook your head, "Ugh, probably it's just that furry devil."

Being as quiet as possible, you got up and made your way to the door, straining to hear, but your heart pounded too loudly and your breathing was harsh. Moving towards the switch, but on second thought you decided against it.

Nothing. Complete silence.

It was when you were finding your way back to the mattress that you heard a white noise, a loud thud and the clear scraping of a chair against the floor. You froze again with wide eyes. You swallowed breaking out in cold sweat.

The squeaking of the cupboard followed by the tinkling and banging of glasses and dishes. You almost had a stroke.

You internally cursed yourself. You had left your phone on the couch. Fuck fuck fuck. The only option left was trying to reach the door and ask for help from the next-door neighbor. But you couldn't do it, the kitchen had a space divider, but it wasn't long enough to avoid being seen.

Weapon, your mind screamed. You needed a weapon.

A relieved smile appeared unexpectedly on your features. You recalled about keeping a knife hidden in the drawer. 'Never say never' when you live alone. Well, it seemed it had been a good idea after all.

You slid your fingers around the rubber grip, dismayed by how much your hand was shaking.

Heading down the hallway barefoot, you hold your breath and slowly approached the living room. With one motion you sneaked into the kitchen, with the blade facing the intruder, and screaming,

"I'm calling the police!"

But what you saw made your jaw drop in shock.

It was Him, the guy from the car crash.

In your kitchen.

Eating your motherfucking chocolate chip cookies.

At 01:00 am.

"Uh, sorry..." he spoke while chewing the leftovers and then swallowing loudly, "..you wanted some?". As if he felt guilty for real, with that childish expression.

You couldn't keep quiet any longer. The situation was too far-fetched.

"WHAT THE HELL?" you snapped. He chuckled at the reference.

"I can't cook. I was starving and I found these. I didn't want to wake you, but this monster here won't get off me..."

"What are you doing in my apartment?"

He tilted his head, pretty confused. "You invited me to stay here..." he remarked, with a hint of displeasure in his voice.

"Yes, I did. But it doesn't mean you can break in without me knowing." You were still a bit scared; he could be dangerous as far as you knew, and his actions had already proved it.

He didn't say anything. He stood up from the island counter, making his way to you. You were slack-jawed in astonishment, still holding and pointing the sharp surface toward him.

"Put that knife down."

"No."

"Why?" he frowned.

"I don't trust you. Don't come any closer!" you ordered.

"I can't take you seriously looking like this" he smirked pointing at your 'night attire'.

He took another step and you run to reach the handle; it turned but the door wouldn't budge.

"It's locked." you turned to look at him "Don't you remember? You did that yourself." he observed, like it was obvious.

"Then how did you get in here?"

"Transmutation."

"Tra-what?" you supposed he must have been out of his mind.

The circumstances themselves were unbelievable. But he was right, you offered him help.

Now he was leaning against the wall a few feet apart from you, locking his eyes with yours, his beautiful features veiled by a shade of dejection and misery. Suddenly, the feeling you had at the hospital came back. Trust.

"I know I'll regret this, but yes, you can stay."

A thankful smile crept across his face and if it weren't for the dark, you could swear that he was also crying.

"But if you don't behave I'll kill you." you threatened in a playful tone, but you needed to scare him a little.

In that moment he understood that he had done the right thing, deciding to take your offer. He had to pick up the pieces and get back on his feet. He couldn't have done it alone.

And mostly, he liked you. You were a warrior. There was something special in you, he could feel it. He could trust you.

"You scared the hell out of me by the way…do not do that again." you spoke as your eyes narrowed.

"I promise" he whispered.

He was kind of a weirdo, but you imagined he'd been through a lot. For this reason, you decided to place the knife on the table and get closer to him.

"But anyway, sooner or later you're going to tell me how you did it." you chuckled showing him the door. You were standing right in front of him now. He was taller than you thought.

"We haven't officially met, I'm Y/N."

In that moment – a moment you'll never forget – he vanished right before your eyes.

Then a sudden voice – that didn't hide insecurity and expectancy – coming from behind, made you turn around and left you in absolute shock.

"I'm Michael. Michael Langdon."

___________________________________________

Tagging (hope you don’t mind, in any case just tell me!) @michael-langdon-appreciation @hecohansen31 @so-langdon @emmyrosee @ladynuwanda @sammythankyou @sojournmichael @hplotrfan

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echodrops · 6 years ago

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The Promises I Made (2018)

For the past twelve years, I’ve spent every New Year’s Eve compiling a list of fifty promises I intend to keep or fulfill over the next twelve months. The results have been truly amazing, and I have kept some promises I never thought I could. Although this year was really, really bad, oh lord... This year, for New Year’s, there will be a new set of promises for to me keep, but here are the old ones, for review!

The Promises I Made (2018 edition)

1) I will be less anxious at work and not let passing comments from students or passive rudeness get under my skin as much. Status: Somewhat kept; I feel like I wasn’t as upset by students being rude this year as last year, but then again that might just be because I had better students. XD

2) I will be more proactive about my responsibilities for the college newspaper committee so we can make a great product. Status: Uhh… Can I count this as kept if the newspaper committee was put on hold due to decisions from the higher administration, so I didn’t have to be proactive about these responsibilities?

3) I will actually visit Mexico, not just accidentally take a wrong turn and end up there... Status: Broken. You know how some people like live next door to a restaurant for years but somehow never get around to trying it? Yeah that’s me, with the entire country of Mexico. Like, I literally live less than a mile from the border… I really should just go get lunch one day or something…

4) I will actually decorate my office with all the stuff I have had sitting around at my house for months. Status: Actually kept. I don’t feel like the decorating is really done in the office, but the decorations are no longer cluttering up my actual home instead of the office!

5) I will be better about focusing so that I can grade quickly and feel less overwhelmed throughout the course of the semester. Status: You know, it’s hard to say whether or not I did grade more quickly because spring semester I took on a really annoying class schedule and it screwed me over hard. I feel like I was a little faster this year, but I felt more overwhelmed than ever.

6) I will get the scratch on my Camaro buffed a bit to clear up the parts that can be cleared. Status: I just… didn’t do this. Broken.

7) I will repair the mortar on the fence outside the Utah house and seal the bricks on the window sills. Status: Somewhat kept/broken. I fixed the mortar on the fence outside but did not seal the windowsill bricks.

8) I will finish at least 26 books over the course of this year. Status: Look man. If my promise had been “Finish 26 fanfics longer than 100,000 words,” I would have blown this promise out of the water. But as it stands, I think I only made it to 10-ish printed books. I’m naughty. 9) I will retrim the grape vine at the Utah house and also spray/get someone to spray to kill the wasps. Status: Broken. I don’t know why I thought it would be smart to make a promise about trimming the grape vine, since that’s something you do in fall… when I’m not even in Utah… Hrmmmm… 10) I will get the mail man to stop delivering the wrong mail to my box because I’m getting ten times more mail for other people than for myself. Status: I had so many opportunities to do this, and I just didn’t. RIP.

11) I will have the fire escape window installed on the Utah house to make it legal to rent. Status: Broken. That’s a lotta money fam.

12) I will update Home and a Half at least four times (and no more double posts, just be chill Yehn, be chill for once…) Status: WOW. I was so, so optimistic, wasn’t I? 13) I will actually build all the furniture I bought for the Texas house and never assembled. Status: Mostly kept? I think there’s like one more thing I haven’t assembled (the spare futon), but up to this point I haven’t needed it, so...

14) I will actually watch Stranger Things since everyone keeps nagging me about it. Status: Broken. I just didn’t do this at all.

15) I will go to a dentist and get this annoying wisdom tooth removed and also see what can be done for my front tooth that got pushed out of alignment by said wisdom tooth. This really needs to happen ‘cause the partially erupted tooth is killing me. D; Status: Wisdom tooth is still hurting me… I am the worst at taking care of myself… 2019… the year of self-care?

16) I will take a road trip with my friend Karen like we’ve been talking about for a while. Status: Actually did this! Finally something completely kept. It was a great trip too.

17) I will continue to serve as the video game club’s faculty sponsor. Status: I was too busy… T_T Broken.

18) I will lower my credit card debt by at least $2000. Moving is so expensive. T_T Status: I ended up having major set-backs this year in the form of having to pay out of pocket for a new windshield in my car and also my Playstation flat out dying on me, so this goal did not get satisfied. But now that my car is completely paid off (hell yeah!), I’ll finally be able to start making big payments on this sucker.

19) I will have ALL my lesson plans planned out in advance for Fall 2018 so that I can just chill next fall. Status: YO THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED. There were still some instances of needing to fix things, but overall I did actually have all the lessons done in advance, and that was probably the only reason I survived fall at all lol.

20) I will finish painting the living room in the Utah house, finally. Status: I… forgot I even made this promise. Yikes.

21) I will be better about walking my dog because I have been slacking lately. Status: I wanted to be better, but every fucking time I go to walk my dog, the neighbor’s Chihuahua runs through their fence and tries to attack my dog, so literally every walk becomes a nightmare and there were a lot of days when I just didn’t want to deal with that stress… :/

22) I will finish a game other than FFXIV this year. Man, so many games have been piling up… Status: I couldn’t even find time to play FFXIV this year, let alone another game… 23) I will write a new, original short story. Status: I… did not write like at all this year. 2018 was just really hard for me. T_T

24) I will get my black glasses fixed this year, finally. Status: Uh… Kept… I think? At least I think this promise was referring to the damage to the frames of my black glasses, which I did get fixed. But now the lens has a scratch… V_V

25) I will attend more professional development/on-campus events and trainings to bolster my evaluation. Status: Eh, kept? I’m signed up for a conference and did some extra training thing that I can throw on the sheet, so I’m calling it good.

26) I will ink and color at least the one drawing of Yehn’zi that I finished sketching a while ago and did absolutely nothing with. Status: A whole lot of nope on this one.

27) I will really finish moving in to my Texas house, no more “I’ll fish out the clothes from the Space Bag when I need them but never actually hang them up.” Status: I’m counting this as kept, since the only thing that didn’t happen is that I never took the plastic wrap off the top of my nightstand, but like… hey that’s a really convenient way to avoid water spots so…

28) I will volunteer at a non-profit organization to fulfill my “service to the community” work requirement. I mean, I will volunteer from the goodness of my heart… yeah… Status: Shitttt this didn’t happen and it really needed to… Oh dear…

29) I will level ALL my classes to 70 in Stormblood. Status: This also did not happen. No time to play.

30) I will reach 1000 followers on tumblr. You should follow me. I’m only marginally a waste of time and space. Status: Kept and exceeded! I’m at like… 1540-ish right now I believe.

31) I will find a salon so I can get my hair dyed consistently instead of looking like a shabby blob half way through each semester. Status: Well, the good news is that my hair color fades so nicely that one of my students actually asked if the strawberry blonde was my natural color. But uh… no… it’s not… so…

32) I will find some way to pay back my coworker for all the incredibly nice things she has done for me already. Status: I mean, I took her out to lunch a lot but I don’t know if I really managed to feel “equal” on the debts I owe her for helping me out.

33) I will see an Anhinga (it’s a kind of bird!) in Texas. Status: Kept! The very first time I went looking for it, I found it, so score.

34) I will win Camp NaNoWriMo this year (because November might never be a possibility for me again, given how much grading I seem to end up doing during that month). T_T Status: Broken. Again, I wrote almost nothing this year. Too much stress. T_T

35) I will scout for new neighborhoods to move to with better internet access and closer to my work. Status: Kept. It’s still a bit too early for me to be looking for specific places, but I have a better sense of where I’ll be aiming for when I do go to buy something.

36) I will try to get better at Spanish, possibly by using my DuoLingo app more. Status: …Broken.

37) I will buy sod for the front part of the Utah house so that my house actually looks decent from the curb. Status: I COULD HAVE… But I didn’t.

38) I will be more proactive about commenting, reccing, and reblogging content I appreciate online because I find so many wonderful things but I rarely say as much about them as I should. Status: I think I was worse about this than last year. I miss the days when I didn’t feel like every five minutes taken to myself was stealing from my work responsibilities…

39) I will actually use my Instagram account to upload my photography somewhere public. Status: I forgot I made this promise too. Oops…

40) I will go dolphin-watching in the Gulf. Status: Somewhat kept? I mean… I stood on the pier… And saw dolphins in the Gulf. That counts, right???

41) I will clear all the photos and videos off my phone and camera SD cards because they are overflowing. Status: Kept but now they’re just sitting on the hard drive unsorted and in a confusing jumble of unnamed folders...

42) I will update my calendar with important dates—holidays, birthdays, etc.—and be productive about sending cards and well-wishes. Status: Broken, just totally broken.

43) I will complete my series of posts about Yato/Hiyori. Really. Status: >___> One day…

44) I will not work later than 10pm on any given work night. I can’t keep running myself ragged. I need to brake sometimes. Status: HA. I was really hopeful. More broken promises…

45) I will explore some new places/cities in Texas that I have not been before. Status: I… did not do this. I had a chance to do this and I didn’t. D;

46) I will get a gardener for the Texas house because the lawn is basically unmanageable by myself. Status: Kept. Because… the lawn really was unmanageable by myself so…

47) I will clean out the fridge more often. No expired milk or ancient leftovers this year please… Status: >_____> Ooopppssss.

48) I will get some sort of watering system set up so that the lawn at the Texas house isn’t a total disaster anymore. Status: Somewhat kept. I did buy hoses and sprinklers to water the lawn but mostly it’s just been raining a lot and that made the grass greener on its own.

49) I will help make one of the super complicated cookies from the new cookie cookbook I bought for Karen. Status: Actually kept! We learned much about the workings of cookie guns.

50) I will keep these promises. Status: Ouch, this one hurts a little.

Totals Kept promises: 12 Broken promises: 29 Somewhat kept/broken promises: 9

Y I K E S ™. I thought last year was crazy and was so hopeful for this year… I had NO IDEA how hard this last year was going to be. So many broken promises; I feel so guiltyyyyy. DDDD; Although I’m still at the same job and not planning on dramatically swapping entire career fields again, things are still in the process of settling and there’s still SO much more I feel like I need to work on. 2018 was the year of being constantly overwhelmed. Unfortunately, 2019 doesn’t seem like it’s going to be much calmer because I’m still working on designing classes and getting my lessons ironed out, but I at least no longer feel like I’m at rock bottom… So, I’m cautiously, very cautiously, feeling the tiniest bit optimistic?

Let’s do this, 2019! The new set of promises will be up by tomorrow.

#50 promises #new year's resolutions #2018 feels like a thousand pound weight on my shoulders #time to shake it off #new year #IRL stuff #welcome 2019!!

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flynnraider-blog · 8 years ago

Text

angst bros 4 lyfe

who: Leonardo Flynn, Damian Briggs tagged: @brigadierbriggs what: Leo and Damian attempt to bond where: Tavern when: 02/08- 02/14 word count: 4211 ish warnings: no formatting and time stamps because what is effort

[2017-02-08 11:57:09 PM] Ro (is trash): Leo sat at a table in the back of the tavern, running his finger over the rim of his glass idly. He’d invited Damian here on a whim, wanting to get to know him more if he was going to be hanging around Sophia as much as he was. But Leo had forgotten to factor in his lack of conversational skills into the mix and now he was quietly panicking, part of him hoping that Damian would never show. It would be easier on his heart, at least. [2017-02-09 12:01:12 AM] Di: The tavern. It was a joke. Had to be. His whole life was a fucking phenomenal laugh. A recovering alcoholic at the tavern. Then again, he'd been there every day that week without so much as a second thought. He couldn't put his finger on what about today made him all that more desperate for a drink, only that no amount of cigarettes could kill the longing. He breathed in as he stepped into the tavern, ignoring the sting of the scent of liquor before locating Leo and sitting across from him. "Hey." [2017-02-09 12:09:48 AM] Ro (is trash): Looking up abruptly, Leo tried for a smile. “Uh – hey,” he gave awkwardly, cursing himself inwardly. Should he give his hand to shake? Would that be weird? What did you even do in this kind of situation? In the end Leo just wrapped his hands tightly around his glass to prevent any weird movements. [2017-02-09 12:10:44 AM] Di: Sitting, Damian raised brow at the weirdness of his body language then smiled. "What'd you need, Leo?" He asked with a pleasant if sterile smile. [2017-02-09 12:20:36 AM] Ro (is trash): Shifting in his seat, Leo smiled back. “I just thought we could try to get to know each other a little?” It ended up coming out more like a question than he had originally intended. [2017-02-09 12:21:39 AM] Di: "Because of Sophia? Or your deep burning curiosity in me?" Damian grinned. [2017-02-09 12:56:14 AM] Ro (is trash): Leo simply shrugged. “A bit of both I guess. Can you really say you aren’t the slightest bit curious about me?” [2017-02-09 12:56:42 AM] Di: Damian shrugged and breathed out, hunching over a little. "You're your own business, Leo." [2017-02-09 12:59:03 AM] Ro (is trash): Finally, somebody who had some sense in them. “”I couldn’t agree more. But for the sake of Sophia, we should learn to get along. She has some idea in her head about us questing together as one big happy family.” [2017-02-09 12:59:42 AM] Di: He snorted, "I'm sure she'll drag Daphne along as well." Damian leaned back, "IT's not a bad idea. Start a party. Form a guild once we get there." [2017-02-09 1:01:07 AM] Ro (is trash): He raised a single eyebrow. “Daphne?” Clearly Sophia had been busy. “The more the merrier, I guess,” he grumbled, not really meaning it. “Having a larger variety of classes should be useful.” [2017-02-09 1:02:32 AM] Di: "She is a druid," Damian tapped his fingers against the table. "Eventually we'll probably bond. I can be her dog in a more literal sense after that." [2017-02-09 1:03:36 AM] Ro (is trash): Leo choked on the sip he was taking. “I – you’re a werewolf then, I assume?” he asked, regaining his footing. [2017-02-09 1:04:27 AM] Di: He laughed and nodded, shrugging a little. "Liked the idea of being changeable to the moon. Might bite me in the ass in a few days... Could you do me a favor Leo?" [2017-02-09 1:05:41 AM] Ro (is trash): The sudden change of pace took him off-guard. “A favor? What kind of favor?” he countered suspiciously. [2017-02-09 1:06:48 AM] Di: "The full moon is coming up, you and Sophie should high-tail it out of here... and the favor is can you take Daph with you? Watch out for the mouthy little brat?" [2017-02-09 1:08:11 AM] Ro (is trash): Leo observed the other man through narrowed eyes. “And go where? Surely the main town is going to be safer than some random forest where the wolves are gallivanting about?” [2017-02-09 1:09:46 AM] Di: "Somewhere where the NPCs would be more in your favor. Like the Mage's palace shit or the Elves homeland BS." Damian murmured, "IF you left within the day, you should be okay." [2017-02-09 1:11:36 AM] Ro (is trash): “You really think the elves want anything to do with me? Unless this is a thinly veiled way to get the two others there while I just rot outside,” Leo snorted. He didn’t appreciate being told what to do with his own sister. [2017-02-09 1:14:24 AM] Di: "Well, you- Sophie's an elf." He pointed out then rubbed at his face. "Most players haven't left this area, Leo and not everyone will be as careful as me." [2017-02-09 1:16:24 AM] Ro (is trash): Leo regarded him coolly. “I suppose I could take the onboard a ship with me. On the water we’d be away from everything.” [2017-02-09 1:16:47 AM] Di: "That would be the most reasonable... Are you a pirate?" He asked after an awkward beat. [2017-02-09 1:18:13 AM] Ro (is trash): “Yup. Figured it made sense, growing up on the coast.” He explained with a shrug. Figuring he should at least put some effort in, he turned it on Damian. “You?” [2017-02-09 1:20:04 AM] Di: "Fighter." He cracked his knuckles then laughed, "Starting to regret it though. All I want is a damn bow." [2017-02-09 1:21:42 AM] Ro (is trash): “Good luck with that. I can’t imagine a fighter is going to have much success with a bow,” Leo said lightly. “But I can’t help but agree. Close range is not turning out to be something I enjoy." [2017-02-09 1:23:39 AM] Di: "I don't mind the close range, I just... I was real good with a bow. Well I haven't grabbed one since my twenties." Damian huffed. "Fuck I'm old." [2017-02-09 1:44:04 AM] Ro (is trash): Leo’s interest was piqued. That was the first personal thing Damian had shared. “You were an archer back home?” Hesitating, he couldn’t help but add “How old are you anyway?” [2017-02-09 1:47:40 AM] Di: "I did say all I want is a goddamn bow, didn't I?" He laughed a little, "Ironically Archer was my mother's maiden name." He hummed a little, "And yeah, I was back in the day. Before I hit my thirties." [2017-02-09 6:30:39 PM] Ro (is trash): Leo whistled lowly. “I can barely imagine surviving my twenties let alone hitting my thirties.” [2017-02-09 6:32:54 PM] Di: Damian laughed and rubbed his face, "I guess I felt that way once. Angsting on the fire escape while avoiding Tony." [2017-02-09 6:34:45 PM] Ro (is trash): “I can’t imagine you hiding to avoid anyone. Who’s Tony?” [2017-02-09 6:35:35 PM] Di: "My ex." He breathed, "From a long ass time ago." [2017-02-09 6:37:15 PM] Ro (is trash): Leo paused. The tone of voice he’d used hasn’t been a friendly one. “Seems not even big bad veterans are free from relationship regrets. Pity.” [2017-02-09 6:42:31 PM] Di: "I mean," Damian rolled his shoulders, "At the time I was neither a veteran nor a big anything. Bit of a twink honestly." [2017-02-09 6:43:56 PM] Ro (is trash): Leo bit his lip to try to contain his laughter. “Now that I’d pay to see. You kind of own the large and scruffy thing like you were born into it.” [2017-02-09 6:45:12 PM] Di: His laughter bellowed through him and he shook his head. [2017-02-09 6:48:16 PM] Ro (is trash): “Alright, alright,” Leo threw up his hands, trying to scowl. But he couldn’t help his small smile. “What ever happened with this… Tony?” He said the words like they were bitter in his mouth. [2017-02-09 6:50:47 PM] Di: Damian raised his brows up high and looked at him. "Have a problem with my ex?" He teased and leaned back, "I went home. It seemed as good as an excuse as any to break it off." [2017-02-09 6:52:34 PM] Ro (is trash): Leo simply grumbled in response. This is why he didn’t get friendly with other people. “Went home? As this conversation drags on I become increasingly aware of how little I really know about you.” [2017-02-09 7:02:05 PM] Di: "I'm from Michigan. I grew up in a little tourist trap till my dad died then moved to Ann Arbor with my mom and her wife." Damian leaned in. "I have... a step-brother who rightfully hates my guts and like one friend. Two with Sophie I guess." [2017-02-09 7:05:55 PM] Ro (is trash): That was a lot to take in. “Michigan…” Leo rolled around the name in his mouth. “Sounds… exciting. I’m sorry about your dad, though.” It came out stilted and awkward, unsure about how familiar he should be. “I’m sure the situation with your step-brother isn’t as dire as you’re making it sound, though. I have like, one friend. And that’s if Sophia counts.” [2017-02-09 7:07:17 PM] Di: "Oh, but it is." He breathed out and shook his head. "I'm sure you have more than one friend. What about the mage?" [2017-02-09 7:09:01 PM] Ro (is trash): Leo sucked in a sharp breath. “Yeah, no. No. That’s…. just no.” No was a understatement. Bei took off like a bat out of hell, there was no way they were anything remotely close to friendly. [2017-02-09 7:11:47 PM] Di: His eyebrows shot up and he leaned in, sniffing him. "Weird." [2017-02-09 7:12:30 PM] Ro (is trash): Leo leaned back quickly in response, expression middy offended. “Did you just…. sniff me?" [2017-02-09 7:14:54 PM] Di: "I guess wolves can sniff emotions now or something." [2017-02-09 7:15:15 PM] Ro (is trash): "...do I even want to know what you just smelled on me." [2017-02-09 7:18:31 PM] Di: "Regret." Damian shrugged and wrinkled his nose. "Also lots of booze here." [2017-02-09 7:19:57 PM] Ro (is trash): “Regret is… an accurate way to put it.” Leo left it at that. “But one would expect that, it is a tavern. I’m used to it I guess, worked at a bar back home.” [2017-02-09 7:24:42 PM] Di: "I mean I'm no stranger to lots of booze but it's different." Damian breathed out, "When you're trying to stop I guess." [2017-02-09 7:26:12 PM] Ro (is trash): Leo caught his meaning. “I… apologize. I didn’t know. We could go somewhere else?” [2017-02-09 7:26:41 PM] Di: He snorted, "Nah. I might as well, ya know." [2017-02-09 7:27:18 PM] Ro (is trash): He raised a single eyebrow. "You really think Sophia is gonna like that answer?" [2017-02-09 7:28:11 PM] Di: "Like what answer?" Damian asked. [2017-02-09 7:45:25 PM] Ro (is trash): "She'll get all righteous and Oh Damian please, you can't go," he tried to mimic her voice best he could. "I worry about you." [2017-02-09 7:45:51 PM] Di: "I am so confused right now man." [2017-02-09 7:46:24 PM] Ro (is trash): Leo just shook his head. "Forget it. What were we talking about again?" [2017-02-09 7:46:53 PM] Di: "Bei." He laughed. [2017-02-09 7:47:45 PM] Ro (is trash): Leo grimaced. “This isn’t anything to say.” [2017-02-09 7:48:17 PM] Di: "He thinks poorly of himself." Damian breathed after a moment. [2017-02-09 7:48:52 PM] Ro (is trash): “Yeah, well he clearly doesn’t think too highly of anybody else either,” he couldn’t help but snort. [2017-02-09 7:51:00 PM] Di: "Leo... when you're fucked up, your entire view of the world is twisted." [2017-02-09 7:51:52 PM] Ro (is trash): Fuck. This wasn’t what he had planned on talking about. “Yeah, well, he isn’t the only one with issues. It’s not an excuse.” [2017-02-09 7:52:34 PM] Di: "No, but excuse isn't the same as an explanation." Damian shrugged."Fucked up people are bad at communication." [2017-02-09 7:53:43 PM] Ro (is trash): “He must be really fucked up then. Because his communication is nonexistent. And that’s saying something, coming from me.” Leo himself was bad at the whole feelings thing but this was a whole new level. [2017-02-09 7:54:25 PM] Di: "He's a vet. We're all real fucked." He huffed. [2017-02-09 7:56:28 PM] Ro (is trash): Leo just scowled and glared at the wall. “I can’t be blamed for something I didn’t even know.” It wasn’t fair for him to be expected to keep that in consideration when no one ever even told him. [2017-02-09 8:03:33 PM] Di: "No. You're right. You can't and I'm not blaming you." Damian replied, "I'm just... saying have a little consideration. Not a lot. Just... maybe ease up on the stink of disappointment." [2017-02-09 8:05:36 PM] Ro (is trash): Leo bristled. “I’m not disappointed. I’m angry. Upset. Hurt. Any or all of the above. I told myself I’d never let myself be treated like that again.” He crossed his arms defiantly. “If he wasn’t interested he could have just said so. I’m a big boy. I can handle it.” [2017-02-09 8:06:43 PM] Di: "You're right, he could have said so." Damian looked at him. "Did he?" [2017-02-09 8:07:16 PM] Ro (is trash): “Did he what? Say so? I think it was pretty damn obvious.” [2017-02-09 8:08:32 PM] Di: "How so?" [2017-02-09 8:11:01 PM] Ro (is trash): Leo went silent. He didn’t want to get into the details with somebody he barely knew. “Trust me. I know. He was terrified at the damn sight of me. I think I said something, I dunno.” [2017-02-09 8:12:49 PM] Di: He nodded and leaned forward, hand on his chin as he leaned on his elbow. [2017-02-09 8:14:39 PM] Ro (is trash): “It’s just… whatever. He’s clearly not interested and I did something wrong, let’s just drop it.” [2017-02-10 1:04:24 AM] Di: "Or he is interested and you both fucked up." Damian said softly. "which is allowed by the way. I guess you just have to decide if you want to live with that." [2017-02-10 1:11:53 AM] Ro (is trash): Leo regarded him evenly. “Last time I thought someone was interested regardless of the signals I got it very wrong.” [2017-02-10 1:14:56 AM] Di: "Last time I fell in love with someone it was so inappropriate that you'd have shat your pants if I told you," He replied without skipping a beat, "But that's not going to keep me from hopefully falling in love again some day." He didn't mention that first he'd have to go through the trouble of falling out of love. Of getting rid of the tight chested problem that burrowed in his core. "Sometimes, you fuck up Leo. Now you're over sensitive to reading things. It's easer to ask." [2017-02-10 2:06:29 AM] Ro (is trash): “A story for another time then,” Leo replied with eyebrows raised. “I know how that feels.” Sighing, he played with his glass. “I don’t even know how to contact the damn guy. Lord knows he doesn’t want to hear from me.” [2017-02-10 2:09:30 AM] Di: "Don't stress." He chuckled, "This place has a way of bringing people together. Just... be open to it. To talking it through even if it doesn't feel easy or good or comfortable." Damian licked his lips. "I wish that someone had told me that running didn't solve shit. That it hurt more people than it helped." He looked at him, "So now it's my job to tell you." [2017-02-10 2:17:16 AM] Ro (is trash): “You sound like the dad I never had,” he said with a small smirk. “Or at least, the one that wasn’t a pezzo di merda.” Leo corrected as an afterthought. “I make no promises, but I’ll keep it in mind. Tone down the general grump and all that.” [2017-02-10 2:19:12 AM] Di: He laughed and shook his head. "Sophie insisted on calling me papa orzo? So I guess it's a fad. Dad Damian." [2017-02-10 2:22:22 AM] Ro (is trash): “Papa bear? Jesus, sounds like her. I got saddled with Da Vinci so consider yourself lucky I guess.” Leo looked at Damian with a wicked glint in his eye. “Hey, got any dad jokes?” [2017-02-10 2:23:30 AM] Di: He snorted, "No. But I told your sister that while Twinks are not snack foods, they are full of cream on occasion." He sipped his water after delivering that line with a straight face. [2017-02-10 2:25:00 AM] Ro (is trash): Leo choked, thankful he hadn’t been drinking anything. “Wow okay that is not something she needs to hear. Please tell me you're fucking with me.” [2017-02-10 2:25:31 AM] Di: "Nope." He popped the p, eyes glittering with amusement. "She called me papa bear, Leo." [2017-02-10 2:26:58 AM] Ro (is trash): Leo gave him a once over with a critical eye. “…Well is she wrong?” [2017-02-10 2:28:07 AM] Di: "Probably?" Damian shrugged as he thought back, "Honestly I can't remember the last time I had sex." [2017-02-10 2:30:14 AM] Ro (is trash): “Ugh, this is so not something I want to talk about with you. And it just makes me think about my nonexistent sex life too,” Leo grumbled. [2017-02-10 2:32:51 AM] Di: He snorted and shook his head. "Fix things with Bei and i'm sure you'll get some action." [2017-02-12 1:58:16 AM] Ro (is trash): “Fixing things with Bei is not all about getting myself laid,” Leo rolled his eyes. “It’s about not having some guy hating my guts wandering around. That can only go poorly.” [2017-02-12 1:59:32 AM] Di: "I doubt he hates your guts." Damian laughed, "He's more the hates his own guts type." [2017-02-12 2:03:24 AM] Ro (is trash): “Ah, finally something we share in common,” Leo grumbled while he fiddled with his drink. [2017-02-12 2:03:45 AM] Di: He stared at him for a long moment. "Leo?" [2017-02-12 2:06:14 AM] Ro (is trash): Leo looked up at him, eyebrows raised slightly. “Damian?” [2017-02-12 2:07:37 AM] Di: "If you like the guy?" Damian said leaning forward, "Really liked the guy then you should make an effort. Because I've met Bei. Down to his core, he's something good. If you don't, then apologize and move on. But leave the man alone if ain't something." [2017-02-12 2:09:13 AM] Ro (is trash): Leo frowned, hands tightening and knuckles going white. ”I should apologize? I should leave him alone? That’s rich considering he came onto me.” [2017-02-12 2:10:10 AM] Di: He held up his hands. "I'm not saying he didn't. I'm saying that whatever happened, both parties had a hand in fucking it up. Miscommunication takes two buddy.' [2017-02-12 2:15:20 AM] Ro (is trash): His scowl only deepened. Leo wasn’t interested in sitting around to be told he’d done wrong when he didn’t even know what the fuck was going on. “I think I should go,” he stated blandly, reaching for his inventory to pay Jonathan. [2017-02-12 2:17:00 AM] Di: "Hey," Damian grabbed his hand, "I'm not trying to be an ass." He whispered, "I just think... Maybe it doesn't matter what I think." He released him with a thin smile. "I should stop putting my face in other people's business. I'm sorry." [2017-02-12 2:21:59 AM] Ro (is trash): “I’m just not so keen on everyone telling me to fix shit when he bailed on me,” Leo said bluntly. Yeah he felt like he’d done wrong, but ultimately Bei was the one who took off. That sent a very clear message. [2017-02-12 2:23:12 AM] Di: "Do you want me to talk to him?" Damian asked. "Cause I'll probably see him again when he runs out of death sticks." [2017-02-12 2:24:31 AM] Ro (is trash): Leo laughed incredulously. “And say what, exactly?” [2017-02-12 2:24:58 AM] Di: "Hey Bei, I don't know what happened with Leo but he's upset you bailed out of no where and doesn't understand what went wrong?" [2017-02-12 2:26:07 AM] Ro (is trash): "Well if you say I'm upset then I just sound like a pansy." he grumbled. [2017-02-12 2:26:38 AM] Di: Damian rolled his eyes at him and punched him in the arm. "Stop being such a fuck boi." [2017-02-12 2:28:17 AM] Ro (is trash): Leo yelped at the hit. "A fuck boi? That implies I'm getting a lot more ass than I am. And not my sad record of one boyfriend - kind of." [2017-02-12 2:29:15 AM] Di: "Kind of?" He asked, brows shooting up. [2017-02-12 2:30:26 AM] Ro (is trash): “It was like 4 months. He wasn’t gay. And had a girlfriend.” [2017-02-12 2:31:44 AM] Di: He patted his back, "Could have been worse." [2017-02-12 2:32:56 AM] Ro (is trash): Leo hunched over and scowled. “Yeah, thanks. I’ll keep that in mind while I’m dealing with my trust issues and emotional wounds from the trauma. I’m sure it’ll help.” [2017-02-12 2:38:17 AM] Di: He fell quiet for a long moment, watching him before sniffling. Holding out his arm, Damian pulled up his sleeve and tapped against the ink on his arm. "If you look closely enough, you can make out some of the cigarettes burns. Not many. He didn't have to do it often to make his point." [2017-02-12 2:41:52 AM] Ro (is trash): Leo peered over, observing quietly. Staring down at the table he ran his fingertips over the grain of the wood. After a while, he opened his mouth hesitantly. “He didn’t need to do anything physically to make his point. He just liked to keep me waiting, prove he was in control. Throw me out of his apartment at random times, leave me waiting for hours at a coffee shop…” Leo trailed off. [2017-02-12 2:43:19 AM | Edited 2:43:24 AM] Di: He nodded quietly before reaching out to squeeze his hands. "Sorry I assumed..." Damian fell quiet. "That he led you on, not that. Not gas lighting." [2017-02-12 2:47:45 AM] Ro (is trash): “I mean, I probably should have done something about it, like left maybe, before… before his girlfriend showed up one day.” Leo winced. That was not a pleasant memory. [2017-02-12 2:48:22 AM] Di: "Leo," Damian whispered, "My mom died and I didn't leave." He shook his head. "It's never that easy." [2017-02-12 2:51:58 AM] Ro (is trash): “…yeah, yeah it’s not.” He admitted eventually. It all seemed so obvious when he wasn’t in the situation, but Leo knew it was different at the time. “Don’t tell Sophia. She doesn’t really know that much about it.” [2017-02-12 2:59:49 AM] Di: "I won't." He shook his head, "I know... something like that, it's private." [2017-02-12 3:00:40 AM] Ro (is trash): Trying to lighten the mood, Leo attempted a small laugh. “She’d probably hunt him down and tear his eyes out anyway. Can’t have her going to prison.” [2017-02-12 3:01:13 AM | Edited 3:06:28 AM] Di: "Are you kidding me? I'll do it for her. Or just send him giant dildos at work." [2017-02-12 3:04:12 AM] Ro (is trash): “Giant dildos- “ he sputtered with a laugh. “That would do the trick. Too much of an attack on his violently masculine heterosexual persona. He’d probably combust.” [2017-02-12 3:06:12 AM] Di: "Or anal beads?" He laughed loudly, "A gag or something? Get into the real freaky shit as you go along." [2017-02-13 12:04:55 AM] Ro (is trash): “Okay, now I’m going to combust. Jesus, you don’t do anything halfway.” [2017-02-13 12:06:56 AM] Di: Damian waggled his brows. "I'm a real sexual fiend." [2017-02-13 12:07:46 AM] Ro (is trash): "Yeah, I really get that from 'honestly I can't remember the last time I had sex'" Leo said with a roll of his eyes. [2017-02-13 12:08:22 AM] Di: "I can't. Part of it having to do with a missing limb, but ya know." [2017-02-13 12:09:16 AM] Ro (is trash): He immediately sobered up. "I'm sorry. You doin' okay?" [2017-02-13 12:11:30 AM] Di: He snorted, "Yeah I'm fine. But when you're an amputee, people are either grossed out or way to into it." [2017-02-13 12:19:35 AM] Ro (is trash): "Way too into it?" Leo repeated in disbelief. "Jesus.... there are some weird people out there." [2017-02-13 12:19:57 AM] Di: "Waaaay," Damian replied as he shook his head. [2017-02-13 12:25:58 AM] Ro (is trash): "Sorry you have to deal with that man. I assume you just tell them to fuck off?" [2017-02-13 12:27:00 AM] Di: "Pretty much." He huffed. [2017-02-13 1:05:11 AM] Ro (is trash): "Hey, at least you have it back in game?" he tried, going for optimistic. [2017-02-13 1:06:11 AM] Di: "For now." Damian laughed, "It's fine. I'm okay." [2017-02-13 10:31:47 PM] Ro (is trash): "For now? You planning to do anything that's going to result in loss of limbs?" [2017-02-13 10:32:59 PM] Di: "Getting out of this game for one." [2017-02-13 10:33:44 PM] Ro (is trash): "Ah. Well, take Sophia with you on the way out, will ya?" [2017-02-13 10:34:17 PM] Di: "You too," He nudged him with his shoulder. [2017-02-13 10:36:37 PM] Ro (is trash): "Yeah, me too," he agreed with a small smile. Honestly, he put Sophia's well being over his own. [2017-02-13 10:36:59 PM] Di: He stared at him a long moment and patted his back. [3:14:29 AM] Ro (is trash): Sighing, Leo flagged down a waiter. "I should probably go. Sophia will be wondering where I am by now." [3:16:38 AM] Di: "Good night, Leo." [3:18:39 AM] Ro (is trash): "Night, Damian." [3:19:16 AM] Di: "Good night."

#c: damian #p: damian001 #skype

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survivorsolomonislands · 8 years ago

Text

Episode 13 “YOU CAN'T TOUCH! THISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!” (Mitchell)

YOU TRY TO ICE MITCHELL AKABANFOVTR THE FORCES OF EVIL AGAINST I, THE ONE LONE LIL EGG IIIIIIIIIIIIIII THE LIL EGG I AM A GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD KNEEL BEFORE ME YOU FCKING DEMONIC HELLFIRE RAINS OF BLOOD I AM SCREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMING YOU DON'T ICE MITCHELL KALABANG MITCHELLV KALABANG IS A FUCKING GOLDEN GOD OF FIREY PASSION AND EUPHORIA YOU CAN'T TOUCH! THISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

THAT VOTE LITERALLY COULD NOT HAVE GONE BETTER WHAT THE FUCK! can someone say final 7?

"but logic and reason isn't a strongsuit for this group" - RTP

Okay, holy crap @ the last tribal. I was not expecting that at all. Luca is starting to come into his own in this game and we gotta be careful about letting him get too deep. Same with Allie. I know Mitchell has that Tyson-ish charm but cmon he has to have burned some jury votes by now. My ideal final 3 would be me-Mitchell-LA, but I cant see any path where that outcome might actually happen :\

I FOUND A SECOND IDOL AND I AM FUCKING SCREAMING 0R3IWDFIOVRCHJEDUOFJNCRIUOEDHNUFIJHRCNUDISHDNFGUIJRKLVEFNDSUGIJNVRIJDSKNFUIJCWNEDUISJFNUIWCJHEDNSAUIROJFNUIWODJNMIUOWEJDNMIFUOHRCNWMD WATCH ME GET BLIDSIDED TOMORROW NIGHT BUT WHAT A WAY TO GO NFUREISDNGFIRVENFDSUIGHFNVKRCJSDNFIJKCDNSKXJFZ

(later)

i really fuckin miss zak

Its kinda embarrassing bc I only got like 35 seconds in the challenge, but thats because I didn't get home until 10 when the challenge was due at 10:30 bc I was seeing a movie with my crush. Anyway I'm really tired but I just wanted to get a confessional in before I go to sleep. So I'll write more tomorrow if I remember.

The saga of L.A thinks she is going home at tribal tonight continues. Luca flipping put me into a shit position, I wanted both Allie and Willow gone and now they want me gone which is fair. There is very little chance Mitchell will side with me, he isn't really talking to me about the vote, and I did try to vote him out last round so there is that too. I still think Willow, Allie and Aro have no chance against Mitchell, but they could be waiting til after I'm gone to take him out but who knows. We don't actually know what the flare is, we think its a vote steal but who tells what their item really is? honestly, this is a gaming of lying, if he has an advantage like that why would he tell people? it makes no sense to me, just like idols. I have learned if you REALLY have an idol you don't tell people. If we can get Aro to vote Willow we might be okay but once again, I haven't heard much from him.

I need to write a longer confessional in like an hour but I'm about to re watch an episode of Pearl Islands. Anyway I know Luca is lying to me, I know they're writing my name down, my perfect record of not getting a vote cast against me is about to be ruined lmao.

Tonight should be pretty easy unless an idol is played. Luca thinks the only people who he can beat are me and LA and wants to get to the end with us. He , La and Ryan wants to blindside Willow tonight. I know my chances of winning are pretty low, but I'd rather lose to Willow than Luca tbh

Oh we're voting LA btw

Okay so this vote will probably go 4-3. I just need to hope it goes in my favor. Ryan really wants me out bc he thinks I'm a threat, and he was talking to Mitchell and Aro about voting me out. Ryan told them that he wants to get rid of me and Allie's duo, and he told Mitchell that he sees me as a bigger threat. I don't really see myself as much of a threat, but I do think there are a few people I could maybe beat at FTC if I make it. I know this sounds selfish but I wish they were voting for Allie over me because one of the only things I've had going for me in this game is that no one has ever voted for me throughout this whole game, oh well, I guess I can't avoid it this round. I just have to hope that LA doesn't play an idol and that I can actually trust my alliance as much as I think I can, bc if one of them flips then I'm fucked.

So it's right before tribal and I'm feeling good. RTP and Luca desperately tried to get Aro and myself to flip against Willow; their desperation makes me think that's their true angle for this vote, and it didn't work out. Luca makes some good points but fails to consider that I've got a F3 with Aro and Willow and that Willow is probably my closest ally in the game. Additionally, he's asking me to boot her over LA, who literally does not benefit my game at all ! Like the girl is nice and I like that she likes Kingdom Hearts but she just doesn't do it for me. We can hardly have conversations and we don't talk game, and I know she's not going to the end with me, so she's gotta go. Provided I'm not about to get royally shanked as I typically do every other round since the merge, I'll be at F6 with an idol, an advantage in the game, and two F3 deals with an obvious target in RTP. If I can just finally best RTP in an immunity challenge at F6, I play the idol at F5 and make it to F4 where I'd like to think that my deals made will carry me to the end where I can finally win. I'm nervous because it's all so clear-cut to me - a legitimate winning path to the end. And if it's so obvious to me, others are gonna pick up on it eventually. I'm hella nervous but I think all the pieces are in place for things to go well tonight. And if not... I'll be seeing Dana and Zak a lot sooner than expected!! Mitchell Kalabang might be your next tumblevivor winner. Just fuckin THINK about THAT !

Holy shit, my confessional game has been WEAK this season. Haven't done one in such a long time, but I have been pretty busy playing the actual game and doing IRL shit a lot. Here we go though. I've been on the right side of a few votes here, Lexi and Zakriah. Then I attempted a failed blindside on Willow and I've realised that I just gave up control of the game to Mitchell!! Silly me! But it was the only way to avoid rocks. I'm likely going out soon despite having Ryan with me as Willow/Allie seem to not want to vote out literally the biggest threat here. My hope resides in getting either the two of them or Aro to vote out Mitchell, his flare will hand him auto F4 I swear to God. That's it for today, until next time!

(Let's pretend I sent this after I was voted out) I am not shocked about the vote, I knew there a slim chance Aro or Mitchell would flip. I have enjoyed playing with everyone. There are things I wish I had done differently but its all things to learn from. As of right now, I hope RTP or Mitchell make it to ftc, and I'm just really glad I made it to jury.

#thequeenstaysqueen

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