#one of which I will never go back to (Apple)

[boypied]

Reed was your professor, and you knew you shouldn't have feelings for him. Truth be told, you only actually signed up to his class because you saw him and thought that he was one of the sexiest men that you'd ever been blessed enough to come across. “Morning, Mr Richards.” You say in a soft yet sultry tone as you gently place an apple on his desk, which is possibly the most cliche thing you've ever done.

“Oh! You're quite early.” Reed chuckles out in a low tone as he turns away from the chalkboard that he is writing on. Reed looks down at his watch to check the time, “You're far more than quite early. Class doesn't start for another hour and a half.” Reed says in a shocked tone that someone would even show up to class that early. “I just wanted to come and see my favourite teacher.” You say in a soft yet seductive tone as you rest your hands against his desk.

Reed's eyes soften slightly as he watches you lean forward against his desk. “Favourite teacher, really?” he says in a confused tone as he leans against his desk, both of your faces now inches from one another. Reed maintains eye contact as his hand grips the apple, and he brings it up to his mouth, slowly biting into the apple that you had brought for him just moments prior. “I've never would've thought someone eating an apple could look so sexy.” You confess.

A small smirk starts to grow on his face as he slowly swallows the piece of apple that he'd just bitten off. Reed pulls the apple away from his mouth and brings it against yours “Take a bite.” he says in a commanding tone. A dark hunger grows behind his eyes as he watches you lean forward and take a big bite out of the apple, the same area that he'd just bitten. “Good boy.” he grunts out as he watches you slowly and seductively eat that apple.

“I need to go collect some things for the class...” Reed begins talking, making sure to look around just in case someone else has just come in. “Why don't we finish this a bit later on, come by my place.” Reed says with a smirk on his face and a dark lustfulness buried behind his eyes as he stares at your lips until Reed's eyes flick back up to your eyes. “Sounds perfect.” You mumble out as you walk away from his desk and over to your seat where you watch him from afar, and he continues to set up his desk and notes for the lesson ahead.

[oikarma]

terrible things

pairing: max verstappen x reader

summary: people like to say love is a static thing-it sparks at first sight and never fizzes out. but maybe it just takes on a different feeling, quite like the ever-changing colors of a flame.

a/n: new month new ending! this is the last part to the number one girl series. hope you enjoy <3

part one / part two / part three

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liked by 703,924 others

f1gossipofficial: Max Verstappen was spotted walking Y/N L/N to dinner from electric lady studios! Two things are on our mind: new music and an old flame.

tagged: yourinstagram, maxverstappen

view all 53,681 comments

user1: i feel like this is going to get messy real quick..

user2: MY YNMAX HEART 🥺 ARE THEY FINALLY TOGETHER

user3: hello? what about lewis FREAKING hamilton?

user4: not y/n in her homewrecker era

user5: woah woah she was there WAY before kelly user6: kelly and max announced their split months ago user7: ikr how are people defending her

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@/charmschoolgirl She is definitely releasing new music. So happy! I hope the Grammy's don't snub her this year.

@/its2ayem freak bro 😭 she just said that her and lewis have never agreed to anything beyond friends & he is one of her closest friends

@/genericuser5 who is this diva 💜

@/bananas I lowk felt bad when the interviewer asked about Max. You could like...see it on her face. How she didn't want to talk about it.

@/charlesdannate but!! she said they were on talking terms again!! and they'd reconciled and also that photo of them leaving els!!!!!!! YN LOVE SONG ABOUT MAX?

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liked by lando, jennierubyjane and 3,910,514 others

yourinstagram: TOO MUCH TO LOSE / FEB 2

view all 702,193 comments

francolapinto: mother 🛐

user1: oh next year is going to be HELL for him user2: @/lewishamilton @/maxverstappen idek which one of you she's dating but DO SOMETHING yourinstagram: oh franco...don't you think i'm a bit too old for you? user3: @/yourinstagram y/n bae he dated a mother of like 3 kids or something age is nothing LMAOAOAO user4: franco's mommy kink allegations r never going away

user5: red is SO your color!!

user6: i love how even her looks r maturing? like on burnout it was all schoolgirl, teen, naive and this album is SERVING.

luxurylaw: pleasure to style you !!

yourinstagram: nono it was MY honor

user7: time to wager. is this a baddie (i eat men) album or a breakup (???) album

user8: well she's all cozy w max now so maybe something happened with lewis? user9: @/user8 WHYYY I LOVED THEM TOGETHER

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r/popheads · 1 wk. ago jammies_on_all_night

Y/N L/N - TOO MUCH TO LOSE [MEGATHREAD]

This megathread is to be used for discussion regarding Y/N L/N's second album, as well as articles and reviews of the album. The album, Too Much to Lose, comes out at midnight in PST.

Please keep all reviews to the megathread - I will attempt to keep the post updated with reviews, please feel free to DM me if I've missed any.

Links to any leaks, as well as asking for any, will not be allowed in this megathread.

Album Links:

Spotify

Apple Music

TIDAL

Amazon Music

Tracklist:

we can't be friends (wait for your love)

prelude in e minor

cornerstone

tis the damn season

i love you, i'm sorry

heavenly

terrible things

don't look back in anger

This thread will be updated with important links for release day events, reviews of the album, etc.

ynsgirlfriend: I was expecting another pop-y album but this was so much more heartfelt. WCBF eats so hard. SO HARD.

↳ dannyric03: Love her growth. Also, the way the album goes from distancing herself (we can't be friends, duh) until the time is right and finding so much beauty in what time you have (terrible things). I don't even want to speculate who the album is about. It's...beautiful. ↳ User5: calling it rn. wcbf (wfyl) is going to be a smash hit on the radio

CharliesPrelude2: literally came up w my user after charlie's prelude (based off of chopin's prelude in e minor) SO Y/N ACKNOWLEDGED ME

↳ SalsaBird: LOL. Loved her on that track. Didn't expect them but they were haunting. Honestly, I'm surprised at how insane her vocals are.

Sharks1039: Trying to decode this. bear with me. [1/2] 1. we can't be friends (wait for your love) - i feel like this is pretty obviously about max. not exactly, bcs i think we've garnered it was y/n who left him first after THAT night (thanks burnout!!) but the fact that she's learning to live without him. even though she still wishes they could be friends. just my interpretation. 2. prelude in e minor - i don't know. it's beautiful. it's chopin. it's y/n. it's just there and a good transition into the rest of the album? it really cleared up my mind and helped me appreciate the other songs. 3. cornerstone - seeing that person in every place. "thought i saw you at the X, but it was only a lookalike." idk who's perspective this is supposed to be from. the message is imo such longing you look for it everywhere. 4. tis the damn season - i feel like the lyrics point toward max (hometown, etc.) but i also feel like we've never really seen anything in the last 4 years indicating a reunion like that. after we stopped seeing her and lewis (we saw them SM last year) i thought something might've gone wrong? i'm p sure they're still on friendly terms, they comment on each other's posts, etc. but less close. maybe some regret from her side?

↳ ApplestoApples: I KNEW I wasn't the only one who thought "tis the damn season" gave Lewis. They hinted at a sort of romance. Especially when Lewis visited Y/N in her hometown (they took a few pictures with fans who'd spotted them). "It always leads to you, in my hometown" is probably about her thinking a lot about that. Sad they didn't work out. Loved how well he treated her and how happy they seemed. ↳ Sharks1039: @/ApplestoApples how did i not know that. omfg it's so about lewis. ↳ Shakes1039: anyway part two of my yap. [2/2] 5. i love you i'm sorry - "you were the best but you were the worst, as sick as it sounds i loved you first" ??? i don't even know what this means but damn girl i hope you're ok now. 6. heavenly - this is such a love song. lowkey found it a TINY bit jarring when we went from ilyis to heavenly but it's more like. i love you (im sorry) to i love you (i'm not)? that's the only explanation i can think of. banger, though. 7. terrible things - MY FAVORITE SONG. ALSO SHOULD BE YOURS. "i can tell by your eyes that you're in love with me" hello. i bawled hearing this. i'm so glad she's found love because it seemed like the max thing shook her up so bad. "don't fall in love, there's just too much to lose ... i beg you to choose to walk away" oh my god. she still sounds pretty worried about how strong love is and how losing a loved one will hurt... 8. don't look back in anger - oasis cover. live. i feel like given the previous song (terrible things) it's like when you walk away to protect yourself from love, don't look back in anger. and at the end of the day, i think this is an album about max. some people talk about how she has growth through the album but honestly idrk about that. it's just her coming to terms with her actions. it's an album about being in love and all the bad things that happen when you're in love. it's an album about deciding to walk away to not hurt yourself. but at the end of the day, people are overcoming that desire to protect themselves. they want to love, even if it hurts.

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liked by lewishamilton and 1,203,864 others

yourinstagram: hello everyone! happy valentine's ♡ i just wanted to take a moment to thank all of you for the support you have shown my music. everyone says this, but the songs i put out are pieces of my heart. they are lessons i have learned and stories i want to tell. some of you have already figured this out, but a little piece of advice:

don't be afraid to love. there are much more terrible things to experience.

view all 291,473 comments

yourinstagram: i mean don't be afraid to love in reasonable circumstances!! 😭 don't be afraid to love if people discourage it, if your heart truly wants it. pls be afraid to love if you're being forced against your will. love you all so much, take care and make good decisions!

user1: she's so real for freaking out over misinterpretation user2: sorry ma'am reading fics of your man as a mafia boss has stopped me from mafia reasonable decisions

lewishamilton: happy valentine's, y/n

yourinstagram: hope the grapes did something for you user3: roman empire unlocked. user4: omfg 😭 not the grapes

user5: hold up. why is no one talking about that photo. it's not in any of her music videos?? she's in that dress in the dlbia live performance but WHEN WAS IT TAKEN

user6: i bet it's max. user7: it's totally max. user8: RELATIONSHIP UPDATE PLS @/yourinstagram

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liked by yourinstagram and 5,019,432 others

maxverstappen: Home is where the heart is.

tagged: yourinstagram

view all 715,893 comments

user1: HARD LAUNCH HARD LAUNCH

user2: it's real omg!!

user3: haven't seen y/n in ages THANK U FOR THE CRUMBS MAX

user4: the way he looks at her...

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liked by 732,891 others

f1gossipofficial: Max Verstappen spotted crying after last Dutch GP. All our hearts are equally as heavy.

view all 13,405 comments

user1: poor man. last year of zandvoort. i'll miss it too

user2: i'm sure y/n will cheer him up! missed seeing her at the last few races

user3: omg what if she's pregnant... user4: girl 😭 i like to think max would've learned from kelly and put a ring on her BEFORE the baby user5: @/user3 yea the last photo we saw of her was like months ago and she was wearing a fur around her waist so we couldn't see much

user5: rip dutch gp.

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maxverstappen: Life can do terrible things. But you are the greatest thing that has ever happened to me.

tagged: yourinstagram

Comments on this post have been limited.

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BREAKING: Max Verstappen has retired from racing. He has reportedly moved back to the Netherlands with remaining family.

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INTERVIEW WITH HUGH L/N-VERSTAPPEN

...

INTERVIEWER: Moving on, congratulations on the Best Actor award!

HUGH gives the interviewer a shy smile. He takes a sip of the coffee in his hands: Thanks. I was so surprised. I didn't think people enjoyed my performance that much.

INTERVIEWER: Well I guess you were proven wrong. How do you feel about following in your mother's footsteps, instead of racing like your father?

HUGH pauses before speaking: I suppose...I sometimes wonder if I would be suited for it. If I could've done more. At the end of the day, acting feels like keeping my mother's legacy. Many people remember her as my dad's wife, or just a songwriter. She went into acting because she loved it. I just wish she was more recognized for it.

[ There is a moment of silence as Hugh plays with the cup in his hands. ]

INTERVIEWER: I know your acceptance speech brought quite a few people to tears. It was very moving.

HUGH nods: I didn't mean to. I just wanted to thank my mom one more time. And my dad, too.

INTERVIEWER: It was a good kind of tears, I'm sure.

HUGH laughs.

INTERVIEWER: Which of your mother's songs is your favorite?

HUGH: Well, my dad used to try singing "terrible things" to me. He's not a great singer, so emphasis on the try.

INTERVIEWER: If I'm not wrong, the song does say "now son, I'm only telling you this because life does terrible things." Is it like a message to you?

HUGH: Yeah. I know the song is about how hard love is and how painful it is. But she did it anyway. What's my excuse? Life is short and there's so much to experience.

INTERVIEWER is handed a note. THEIR eyebrows furrow, looking at HUGH: Sorry, would you be comfortable answering a question about your dad? I know you only agreed to talking about Y/N. We can cut this part out if you mind.

HUGH shakes his head: No, it's quite alright. What was the question?

INTERVIEWER: Well, your father hasn't made any public appearances save for your Academy Award win. It's been many years...would he like to pass on a message?

HUGH: Oh, my dad loves to talk. Let me think. He's old, you know that. I think he enjoys the quiet life. He wouldn't survive in an F1 car nowadays, but he still enjoys driving.

[ HUGH thinks. The INTERVIEWER doesn't prompt him. ]

HUGH smiles to himself: I don't think he'll be showing up at any of my future premieres. Don't expect that. It's been a while, yeah. But he's happy with his years. He said he's close to seeing her again.

INTERVIEWER only nods. There are tears in both their eyes.

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a/n: it's over! lowk felt bad for the ending. but i think i like it this way. sorry ynlewis stans. i just think. at the end of the day they would find their way back to each other.

[nakidoriii]

Speechless (Part 1)

Nerdjo x Reader

Warning: sexual tension, mild smut descriptions|| MDNI

“Ooo, that’s not good.” Gojo says looking at your test grade as you wallow in disappointment at the table.

This is the second math test in a row that you’ve scored a 70/100 on. If you don’t ace the next one, your parents aren’t going to pay for you to go to Osaka this summer.

“Gojo, I don’t know what to do. I literally have perfect grades in every other subject. Why does math have to be so hard?” You whine into the table.

“You shouldn’t be so hard on yourself, prez.” He says as he rolls up your test and hits you on the back of the head with it. You lift your head off the table and sit up, looking up at Gojo’s blue eyes as he stands next to you.

You grab your test from him and say, “I need to start studying for the next test TONIGHT.”

Gojo places his hand on the back of his neck and takes a breath. He wanted to ask you if you wanted him to tutor you, but he was too nervous you’d say no. You are the president of the student council and Gojo is your vice president. You’re pretty popular due to you being so heavily involved with extracurricular activities at your university. Gojo is the smartest in the school but not as popular as you since he kept to himself most of the time. Most people were intimidated by him. When you both got elected, he knew that was the only way he’d get to talk to you. You two often saw each other throughout the week and had lunch together regularly but you’ve never had a conversation outside of student council.

“I….I can help you study. If you want me to. I’m not busy tonight.” He says quietly.

“Would you? You can stay over for dinner and everything!” You exclaimed.

“Yea, sure.” Gojo says trying to be normal about the fact that he’s going over to his crushes house.

“YES! I’m gonna pass for sure this time.” You wrap your arms around his tall frame and frantically say, “thankyouthankyouthankyou.”

The apples of Gojo’s cheeks turn pink at the sudden physical contact with you. You look up at him realizing he was startled by you hugging him and let go.

“Sorry, I should’ve asked first.” You say backing from him.

You didn’t realize his body was so…solid. From that hug alone, you felt how toned his stomach was. Knowing that made you pretty curious.

“N-no, it’s okay.” He says trying to compose himself.

“Cool, do you have any more classes today? If not, we can head over to mine now. I’d hate to just have you over to study.”

“I don’t have anything else today. It'd be fun to finally hang outside of school.” He says as he packs his bag.

“Great! I think this is the beginning of a wonderful friendship, Gojo. Don’t you?” You say knowing damn well it’ll make him blush.

“That is, if we have anything in common.” He teases back to your surprise. You both start walking out of the board room, walking side by side, heading to the train station.

“Of course we do! We’re in the student council together, which means we should have something in common. Do you read manga?”

“Nooope.” He sings.

“Anime?”

“Eh, I used to watch but not since I started college.”

“….music? You have to listen to music…” you say flashing him a face of disgust as you reach the station. You get in front of him to lead him to your train.

“Of course, I listen to music, Y/N. But It wouldn’t be anything you’d like…. I like sweets though.” He says getting out his card to swipe through the gates.

“Eating sweets isn’t a hobby…” you swipe your card to get through the gates. It’s crowded as usual. You grab his hand, making sure you don’t lose him in the sea of people. His hands were big and soft, the tips of his fingers a bit calloused. You rushed on the train holding Gojo’s hand as the doors opened. The crowd of people push you both toward the window.

“Ugh, I can’t believe how cramped this is.” You say trying to adjust yourself not realizing your butt is brushing up against Gojo’s crotch. He couldn’t begin to fathom how this was happening in broad daylight. His face turned bright red.

“Y/N, pl-please turn around. I can’t…” he mumbles in your ear.

You look down, realizing just how close you were to him. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t like how flustered you made him. You never notice him get like this over you but yet again you guys had never hung out. He places his hand against the wall of the train, creating the smallest space for you.

“Ahhh, I’m sorry Gojo.” You say turning to face him.

“It’s fine, not your fault.” He says trying his hardest to play it off.

You two didn’t talk much on the train ride to your place. It was filled with sexual tension though. You two were so close that whenever Gojo looked down, he got a great view of your breasts. When you looked up, you were met with a view of his sharp jawline and collarbones. You hoped the train would make a hard stop so that he would move closer.

“This is my stop, let’s go.” You say leading him off the train.

Once you get off the train and leave the station, you propose that you stop at the convenience store near your place. Gojo agrees and you both head in.

“Get anything you want, I got you.” You say as you look at the shelves.

He nods and starts to look around. You grab a few snacks and drinks and walk up to the counter to check out. Gojo comes up behind you and places his hand full of things on the counter. It was all sweets… damn he was not kidding. You pay for everything and he grabs the bag from the clerk.

“Thanks.” He says as you two start walking to your apartment.

“You're welcome. Thank you for asking to tutor me. My apartment is right up here. I’m on the 4th floor.” You say as you walk up the stairs with him following you.

Once you get to your place, you both take your shoes off at the door and get comfortable in the living room. He spread out all the snacks on the table as if they were all on display.

“Can I get you something to drink? Tea?” You ask.

“Yea, oolong is good. Do you live alone?” He asks, sitting on the ground.

“Yea, I do. My family lives out of the country while I go to school here. I��m sure you know I’m a foreigner by my appearance, that’s not much of a shock.”

“That’s cool. Your place is really cozy. I wouldn’t have imagined it to look like this.” He says as he takes a bite out of whatever snack he chose.

“You’ve imagined what my apartment looks like?” You say.

“You’re the prettiest girl in our graduating class, Y/N. Every guy has thought about what the inside of your apartment looks like.” He says nonchalantly.

You look up from the tea that you’re preparing, shocked that he said that to you. Was this the same guy that was blushing from you giving him a hug earlier? He gets up from the floor and smirks at you.

“Speechless? I don’t know why… you are on every guy's mind right now.” He says as he walks over to the kitchen.

He gets directly behind you, pressing the bulge in his pants on your ass. You couldn’t even pretend to understand where this confidence came from. You bite your lip in anticipation, waiting to see what his next move is.

“I fear that you’ve been on my mind the most.”

Masterlist

Part two coming soon <3

Please don’t alter or steal my writing ©️

[foolsjudge]

Waiter! Waiter! More hcs please! /ref

sprints over to you with a plate full of hcs DINNER IS SERVED!

(I am baaaack, so sorry for my long absence, had loads of shit to do, but never mind that now!)

MORE SHADOWSPICE HEADCANONS:

Before battle Shadow Milk kisses Burning Spice for good luck (Burning Spice does not want to admit he enjoys the gesture, since he does not want to show weakness in front of his soldiers)

They loved each other before they were corrupted Then they lost touch as they were too focused on their own struggles and because their rage and corrupted minds blinded them to focus on anything else When they were trapped all together, they found back together and got closer again as they realized even after everything that happened, they still care and love each other in their own twisted way

Shadow Milk likes pulling tricks and pranks on others, Burning Spice finds it entertaining and sometimes helps him pull off the pranks (they both thrive off of the demise of others)

Burning Spice often gets lost when visiting Shadow Milk's castle (One time he was lost in the hallways and Candy Apple found him. Eventually she led him to Shadow Milk's room, but under the condition that he would carry her on his shoulders and she'd just tell him where to go... he agreed since he didn't have any other option)

Burning Spice is really bad at giving compliments (best ones he can give is when he isn't sober), Shadow Milk on the other hand has his way with words and delivers peak compliments, which make Burning Spice flustered every time without a doubt (he denies it tho and pretends he doesn't care... he cares very much)

Burning Spice gives out really tight hugs Shadow Milk once pretended that he broke his spine during a hug...let's just say Burning Spice was more than pissed (he full on panicked and after he heard Shadow Milk's mischievous laughter he dropped him and furiously chased him across the halls)

They both still remember the day they first kissed (before corruption)

THAT'S IT FOR NOW! ENJOY! (will be posting nsfw hcs later too)

[runawaymarbles]

For the Unpopular Opinion ask game:

Some types of onions can and should be bitten into like an apple.

strongly agree | agree | neutral | disagree | strongly disagree

Here's why: there's this story from the Monache about a group of six women who were out foraging and discovered wild onions, which completely blew their socks off. They ate onions raw all day and then brought the rest home, and their husbands complained that they reeked. And the women said, ok, but have you tried these onions? And the husbands said "I do not like it Sam I Am," and refused to eat them, but just being around their wives made the husbands smell like onions too. So the next day when they went hunting, all the animals avoided them. And so the husbands told their wives they had to stop eating onions, and the women said, sorry, if it's a choice between you and the onions, we will choose the onions every time. So one of the woman grabbed her baby and then they all went back to the onion field and sang themselves into the sky on a ladder made of feathers, because this was before Big Lawyer decided to make divorce more complicated than singing yourself into a sky on a ladder made of feathers. And then their husbands experienced regret and tried to go after them on their own ladders, but the women said, fuck you, you don't like onions, and stopped the men midair, where they became the Hyades, and the women and baby went higher and became the Pleiades, where they lived happily in the sky with their onions and without their husbands

And the moral of the story presumably is that you should never tell anyone that they can't eat an onion in any way they please.

[milkymora]

left ✧ tsukishima kei x fem!reader ✧ smut ending

note: beware of the ending, it sucks. i wrote this at 4am and realized i was making it way longer than intended so i tried to give it a decent end (failing). it’s also not really proofread so beware of terrible writing & hideous grammar too lmao. mdni.

tw: drunk sex. oral (both r! & tsukki! giving and receiving). fingering (r!receiving).

“so,” tsukishima spoke next to you in a low voice, so that only you could hear it, stopping your zoning out.

you turned your head to him, the voice of the others fading into background noise. “mh?” you hummed, with your cheeks still full of food, inviting him to go ahead.

“how did you sleep?” he smiled, perhaps trying to sound somewhat innocent, although you understood immediately what he was hinting at.

playing it cool, you swallowed your bolus.

“pretty good. what about you?” you held the fork in your hand, partly covering your lips; something you had the habit of doing when eating in company of others.

for a moment, you left your eyes wander on his lips as he spoke.

“amazingly.” he responded, shoving a forkful of the pasta on his plate in his mouth. you watch the way his adam apple moves when he takes a swallow, thinking, for a moment, that that’s how it might’ve looked like yesterday, when he had his tongue inside your mouth. your eyes ajar slightly at the memory of how it felt.

though that wasn’t the place, nor the moment, to think about such things. you weren’t alone.

of course he didn’t really give a shit about it.

“everything alright?” he asked you, seemingly amused.

he knew what you were thinking about. it was written all over your face. or perhaps you were like an open book to him.

or, perhaps, he knew it because he was thinking about it too.

you cleared your throat, fixing your position on your chair, that was suddenly so uncomfortable. “yes.” you murmured, unable to hide your shame in being so goddamn obvious.

“huh? couldn’t hear you.” he leaned in to you, a grin from ear to ear that you wanted to smack away like never before.

“yes.”

“y/n, you look a little red.” shimizu pointed out, almost making you jump. you hadn’t notice her looking at you. was she listening to what you’ve been saying?

“ah, am i?” you nervously laugh it off, low key cursing your friend in your head for saying something like that out loud so carelessly.

“totally. here,” she chuckled, opening a bottle of water and pouring some into your glass, “have this.”

“should’ve given me some wine instead.” you laughed, drinking the fresh water in your glass. you weren’t one to drink, but it could’ve helped to ease up a little.

“hah,” tsukishima scoffed, “you? drinking?”

you turned your head to him again. “yeah,” looking right into his eyes, you grabbed the bottle of red wine the waiter brought on the table a couple moments prior, opened it, poured some into your glass and slowly consuming it, never detaching your eyes from his. “drinking, like this. what about it?” you deadpan.

and he didn’t as well. he kept eye contact all the way, until you put the glass back on the table, which made it way harder for you not to turn red. “nothing. can i have some too, miss?” he asked, that arrogant smile never leaving his lips.

“sure.” filling his glass to the brim, you mimicked his tone of phrase. “as much as you want, sir.”

“get a room, you two!”

the both of you whipped your heads towards the voice it came from, finding a little yachi looking at you with a raised eyebrow. “seriously.” she added after seeing your shocked faces, a smirk you’ve never seen on her doll face.

heavy silence fell between you two as you noticed that also daichi, sugawara and shimizu were peering at you with what looked like amusement on their visages.

kei cleared his throat with a cough that sounded vaguely forced and went back to eat, before attempting to change the subject.

you still noticed the subtle blush on his cheeks, though.

apparently, you weren’t the only one who wasn’t expecting the others to have heard your interaction.

“any, uh..” he drank another glass of wine, licking his lower lip, where a drop was starting to slide down his chin, “any new about the team we’ll play against after winter break?” he inquired, a question thrown in the air to be answered by anyone, but he specifically looked at daichi for a response.

“nope, nothing. they’ll let us know on monday or close.” daichi spoke with his typical fatherly voice. “m’kay.” dryly replied the tallest, pouring himself yet another glass of wine.

“woah, slow down, tsukki. leave us some.” yamaguchi chuckled, teasing his friend. “he’s right. at least ask us if we want some as well.” you joined in.

tsukishima huffed. “anyone who wants a sip?”

everyone shook their heads. everyone except you.

“me.” holding the glass between your index and middle fingers, you slid it towards his direction.

he looked at you, and wordlessly filled it halfly. as he was placing down the bottle, you grabbed its neck.

“don’t be stingy.”

an inquisitive stare began showing on his traits, looking at you in such way you didn’t know how to interpretate.

you wanted to ease up. and it was doing the job amazingly. so much, that you didn’t even realize you were slowly getting light headed.

seeing he wasn’t budging, you sighed. “c’mon, just one more glass. i know what i’m doing.”

“do you?” he pried, that tint of concern that made those butterflies dance in your stomach every time.

“mhm.” you pointed your half filled glass with your chin. “don’t be boring. you’re not my dad.”

he kept still a couple more seconds, but, in the end, he gave in, adding another two inches of the fruity liquid, which you wasted no time bringing to your lips to relish it fully.

your throat burned, but it wasn’t an unpleasant feeling.

the others had returned to each minding their business, when shimizu offered to go outside to smoke a cigarette. it wasn’t her habit at all, nobody’s habit in your group, however, just like it wasn’t your habit to drink, she wanted to do that in that social situation.

after all, a cigarette wasn’t gonna kill anyone.

just like another glass for you, you thought.

most of the members got up from the table, basically everyone. shimizu was the only one who wanted to smoke, along with yachi and asahi, but they hall felt the urge to go outside to take a break of fresh air and stretch their numb limbs, that had been sat down for a good hour now.

which left you, tsukishima and other members who were too far from you to be minded at all, alone in that big table.

a sigh flied out of your lips, the afterstate of the alcohol lingering in the walls of your mouth. without thinking twice, you grabbed the bottle once more.

“you shouldn’t do that.” his tone reverberated in your ear, like a warning.

“i’m still doing it–” you began, “then fill mine too.” he interjected before you could finish.

you rolled your tongue on your teeth within your closed mouth to hide the grin that threaten to betray your pokerface you’ve managed to hold for quite awhile.

you filled his glass, after you did with your own.

“cheers.” you lift your glass. he meets it, then a ‘clack’, and you’re both shoving the booze down your throat once again.

“you know,” you start, your inhibitions fading away every seconds that goes by. “i’ve bought you something.”

“me too.” he stated, unfazed, placing down his glass. he shifted his position on his seat to face you, moving his right elbow over the chair and his left one on the table.

“oh?” your heart fastened. “what is it?” you question.

he fidgeted with his black tie. “i’ll show you later.” he murmured.

“what? no, you can’t tell me this after you’ve made me curious!”

“oh, i can.” his foot gets between your legs the moment you move to face him as well. your breath cut short at the gesture, without really opposing to it.

“why?” instead, you ask.

“because. don’t insist.” he slides up his foot, reaching your knees.

instinctively, you close them, squeezing the tip of his shoe between them.

his gaze falls down. “what are you doing?” you question, tightening your squeeze as you feel his shoe trying to move forward. “we’re not alone.” you alert.

your statement makes him go quiet, getting lost in his own thoughts briefly.

“would you let me do it if we were alone then?” his tone cuts short too, his ears turning peach.

“do what?”

it was useless to lie or play stupid anymore. you knew what he wanted to do, god, everyone noticed the sexual tension since the beginning of that dinner.

and you wanted too. still, you needed to hear him say those dirty words. you wanted to see for how long he could keep going, before giving in. because, as much as you wanted, you were not gonna give in first.

“say it.” you loose your squeeze a little, just to make him come closer your crotch. after a couple more inches, you tighten the squeeze again.

his chest rises and falls at the view, unable to unlock his gaze from your thighs, his cheeks now visibly red, a mixture of the alcohol and excitement. “hey, now,” his whisper closer to a whine. a beg.

the sound of a door being opened and voices chatting in the distance made you snap away, pushing his leg away from your body. “uh—” he jumped backwards, gripping the chair’s backrest as to not fall down.

without being given time to realize, your friends had returned to their little outside break. kyoko, daichi, tadashi, sugawara and yachi all went back to their respective seats around you and kei, along with the other guys at the other end of the table.

“my god, you actually finished the whole bottle?” tadashi lifted the empty bottle with his hand, shocked to see not even a drop was left at its bottom.

you raise your face to him, taken aback by his sentence. “i’m so sorry– i’m gonna buy another one for you only, guys.” you looked at the bottle, noticing just then that you seriously finished a whole bottle with him in less than an hour.

“no! no, it’s fine.” yamaguchi laughed, ashamed. “i didn’t mean to actually make you feel bad, sorry.” he scratched the back of his neck, flashing you a sweet, displeased smile.

“i don’t care, i’m buying it anyway... i genuinely didn’t realize.” you got up from your seat, your purse in your hands. “be right back.”

quickly, you pulled your coat over your shoulders, heading towards the bar at the other part of the restaurant, crossing the hall hastily.

you walked up to the bartender, ordering two more bottles, each with a different flavor as to accommodate to your friends’ personal tastes.

as you wait for the barman, who has went to grab the bottles in another nearby room, you feel a pair of hands go to lay on your shoulders.

“sly, smart girl.” tsukishima whispers in your ear.

heath spreads all over your body as his warm breath tickles your ear. you grab his hands and place them on your hips.

“finally noticed, huh.” you whisper back, leaning the back of your head on his shoulder. “took you long enough.”

his thumbs draw circles on your hips, pulling them against his groin, his head buried in the crook of your neck.

your eyes widen when you sense his erection on your ass.

“give it to me.”

and that was all you needed to hear to let go of that last drop of dignity that the alcohol hadn’t taken away from you still.

“there you go!” the bartender returns to the bar, the two bottles you’ve ordered in his hands. but the girl who had come to take the order is not there anymore.

your back hits the cold tiles of the restroom aggressively, legs hooked around his waist as he holds them up in place with his hands, fingers digging into the naked flesh of your thighs.

“hey-” you gasp, out of breath, as his tongue slides up your neck, sucking on its sensitive skin to leave red hickeys all over it, making your eyes roll back in ecstasy. “take those off,” you ask, no, beg, tugging pathetically at his boxers with pure need.

his pants are scattered on the floor, his boner throbbing into his now too tight underwear, rubbing against your covered clit, soaking those poor panties to the point of wetting his underwear too.

his head moves away from your neck in hearing your request, strings of saliva rolling his chin from both corners of his mouth, to watch your face.

“no, you take them off.” is his only reply, dropping you down from his hold and taking a step back, standing still in front of your hyperventilating, messy frame.

your eyes fall down on his bulge, staring at it for so long he begins to chuckle. “first time seeing one?” he asks.

you don’t respond. instead, you take a step closer, kneeling down, so that your face was right in front of it. your hands are shaking mildly, but his legs are as well, so you’re not too bashful about it.

“first time seeing yours.” you murmur, feeling your chin being lifted of a couple inches, his thumb on your lower lip.

“suck it.” he moves his finger upwards, into your mouth. you suck on it for only a moment, feeling it leave your mouth almost immediately.

“no,” he laughs under your confused face, “not this one.”

your fingerstips curl on the fabric of his underwear, as your lips start printing slow and wet kisses on his pube, slipping them down. your hand goes to grab the shaft, while your tongue slides down, beginning to suck on his balls.

you stroke his dick up and down multiple times at a slow pace, before sliding your tongue from his shaft to the tip, finally taking it into your mouth with a hum.

your hands caress his tense abdomen, his thighs, his hips, as your tongue runs all over his veins, your head moving back and forth in smooth movements.

his hand goes on your head, guiding your movements, hissing pleased sighs with clenched jaw, fighting the urge to pull his dick down your throat further.

you take it out your mouth to slap your tongue with it, whilst continuing to stroke it with your hand. when you’re about to start sucking it again, he moves backwards, his back hitting the door.

“i wanna do that to you,” he pants, going to grab your triceps to pick you up from the floor.

you place your hand on his nape, jerking his face towards yours to kiss him avidly, tongue seeking his. he doesn’t pull away for a hot minute, until pushing you on the toilet, spreading your legs and kneeling down between them so rapidly you can’t even think straight anymore.

you watch as he removes the remaining cover up of your pulsating pussy, wasting no time and burying his head between your legs, lifting them over his shoulders and beginning to lick your entrance with such energy you find yourself struggling to stay put.

“fuck,” you throw your head back, your clit swelling up as his tongue stimulates your good orgasms, making you forget everything else, even the public place you’re having sex at.

“feeling good?” he questions, hot breath against your cunt causing shivers to roll down your spine. “yes,” you cry, pushing his head against you, “keep going,” you hiss.

soft moans fill the room as his middle and ring fingers penetrate you, curling into your morbid walls, sloppy sounds so awfully good to hear growing as he fastens his speed, making you go nuts, moaning and whimpering like the slut you were for him.

tsukishima knew you were nearing your climax when your breathing began so fast you sounded like you were crying, begging to go faster, and faster, and faster—

two knocks on the door. then a phrase.

“guys, are you done fucking in there? we’re about to go.”

spoke a voice you haven’t heard well enough to recognize who it belonged to from far behind the door.

you were a total mess, dripping liquids from your freshly fucked hole, with your shaking legs still around his neck.

and he wasn’t any better, being completely naked, crouched in that filthy bathroom floor with the taste of sex in his mouth and his sticky fingers and upright, sore dick.

you looked at the door, then at each other, a mixture of fear and frustration on both your messed up faces.

another voice laughed from behind the door, “y’all did get a room in the end.”

this time, there were no doubts whose voice that was.

✧ previous

[esamastation]

Gamer girl gets transmigrated into a farm boy Chapter 5 [<<Prologue | <Chapter 4 || Chapter 6>>] Ao3 link

-

The rest of the day goes by much the same way it did in the game. They make their way back to the farm, where Van helps Mr. Gylcross unload his purchases and carry some of them to the barn and the rest into the house. Janelle welcomes them with a warm meal and freshly made batch of apple juice, made from, "Apples I picked myself just this afternoon!" as she says. It's delicious.

"What did you buy in town?" Josel asks as they eat.

"Nothing much," Van answers, and ain't that the truth. "Mostly I just looked around, took in the sights."

Josel hums. "Yeah, you haven't been to the town a lot, have you?"

"I guess not," Van agrees, thinking back to the player character's messy background as a hand on the Gylcross farm, and how it might be revealed here - if it even was.

"How did you like it? Did you see anything interesting in town?" Janelle asks curiously.

"It was fine. It was all pretty interesting," Van admits and takes a bite of bread, wondering if she made it herself.

The System journal had updated while he'd been in town, and going by its writing, it was the most amazing thing ever to happen to Katie. Most of the journal entry was her detailing every event that happened, but there were some interesting titbits in between, which Van had noticed but not really thought about at the time.

… Oh my god, the town looks exactly like it did in the game! Only now I'm seeing it all in first person! It's so wild. There's so much more people here than there were in the game, too - probably since the limits of rendering capacity have been thrown out of the window. Real world isn't held back by RAM. Hah.

Also? Kids. There are children here - and not just one-age-fits-all like in some games, no, there's older teenagers and younger teenagers, and I also saw a toddler in the marketplace - and I think one woman had a baby in a sling? A baby! Definitely didn't have any of those in the base game - not a single kid to be had in all of Age of Tales, except in pre-rendered cutscenes. I wonder if it's just for humans, or will we get to see dwarf or elf babies - I've never seen a dwarf baby, ever, in anything I've ever seen or played. Probably not elf either, unless it was like a half-human-half-elf situation brought forth by an illicit cross-species love story.

I wonder if Van can have babies - like, conceive them? I mean, there's romance in Age of Tales, such as it is. There's sex scenes and stuff. Can those now have, like, consequences? Does this world have contraceptives? Is that something that I have to now think about?

Van with a baby would be pretty cute, though. I wonder if I can somehow get him to hold a baby…

And that's where Van had to stop reading in order to preserve the delicate equilibrium of his mental stability.

"There were a lot of people in town," he concludes with a cough to clear his throat, and takes another sip of the apple juice.

Janelle gives him a sympathetic look. "Yeah, it's a bit different from how it's around here, huh?" she says and pats him on the shoulder. "I'm glad you had fun."

"Yeah," Van agrees.

By now he's kind of starting to feel the limits of Katie's social meter, though. She'd never been a particularly extroverted person, and while it's different inside a videogame… this isn't a game, not really. It's been a whole day of interacting with people and trying to figure things out, and Van is feeling mentally kind of worn down.

Plus, he's got an existential crisis scheduled up, and it's starting to feel kind of urgent.

"You mind if I turn in for the day, sir?" Van asks once he's done eating, turning to Mr. Gylcross. "I'm kind of tired."

"Of course, my boy. Just get Bell settled in for the night and get the cart in the barn," Mr. Gylcross says.

Thankfully, Josel has apparently done all other farm-related duties off screen. All Van has left to do is get the cart inside and Bell brushed up, fed, and settled in a stall, all of which happens by automation. Josel, who's got a more permanent berth in a little hutch next to the farmhouse, bids Van good night, and with some relief Van heads up to the hayloft.

There he lays down in the hay, mentally preparing to Think About Things and Handle Them… only to find his mind full of static. He needs to deal with the Realisation and he needs to come up with a plan for tomorrow, because there's a lot coming his way tomorrow.

And yet, even though he lies there for a while, staring at the ceiling, not a single coherent plan comes to mind.

Finally, Van gets up again and goes back down to get a bucket of water. It's not quite as good as a real mirror, but in a pinch…

His reflection is very faint on the water's surface, but he can just about see himself and make out his features. The caramel ice-cream hair is really not looking its best. It's curly in the game, kind of fabulous in a way that doesn't fit Van's body type at all - here it sticks every which way, unkempt and not exactly flattering.

No permanent magical hairstyling in real life, huh.

Combing his fingers through his hair to push it away from his face, Van turns his head this way and that, taking in his features again. The jaw, the cheekbones, the forehead - he really looks like he was drawn by a comic book artist. Except made real. 

He's really - Katie is really in Van's body. This is Van, made flesh and blood. Well, he doesn't actually know if the body can bleed, but it probably does. It gets hungry and thirsty. And, judging by the feel of things right now, it also needs to relieve itself. Which is… another thing he hadn't been thinking about.

Sitting on his knees for a moment, Van weighs the oncoming mental health crisis against probably mortifying body function weirdness and chooses the latter, standing up. Time for a true fantasy adventure - figuring out how men piss.

Delightful.

Though as a man he should be able to go wherever - so long as he wasn't flashing someone, anyway - seeing as this is the first time and Katie only sort of knows what she's doing… yeah, some privacy is called for. There's a wooden outhouse behind the farmhouse, which Van slinks his way to like he's doing something wrong and illicit. The outhouse is pretty small and forces him to bend over, and it's overall very awkward. It stinks. The seat is tiny and looks kind of uncomfortable to actually sit on.

Katie has a feeling she's going to miss Earth's modern day plumbing before long.

Right now she has other concerns, though.

Van takes a deep breath - and then regrets it, because of the outhouse smell - before looking down. The trousers are easy enough to figure out, they're basically normal trousers except fastened with a string instead of zipper. The underwear, not so much. While Katie has seen it before and actually spent quite a bit of time trying to figure it out, seeing it on Van now…

It's a kind of cloth wrap thing, like the whole thing is one long stretch of fabric wrapped around the waist and down. The final effect is not unlike briefs, and it's actually kind of comfortable and it definitely keeps everything contained… but if Van takes it off, he will definitely not be able to put it back on again.

Hm, maybe he can, sort of… move it aside…?

Touching it is a bit weird. Katie does a little gibbering flailing thing in the back of his mind while Van tugs at the fabric, feeling all the stuff beneath shift - feeling all the stuff feel the movement. It's weird - having sensations in bits Katie never had before. 

Kind of cool though, too. In a sort of unreal way.

Van gets his fingers beneath to pull his penis out and then… there it is, sticking out past the cloth, with its two buddies still nestled in the wrapping.

It would probably be inappropriate to call it a tool. It kind of fits, though. It's very… proportional. 

And Katie is suddenly very aware of her long stint as a single woman, because damn. Like, she's never been that into the look or size of a guy's dick - a penis is a penis, they're all kind of the same in the end - but damn. Van has one hell of a dick. Like, Katie probably wouldn't want to have sex with Van, because ouch… but damn.

"Okay, don't play with it, just do your business," Van mutters, thinking back to Katie's stint in the kindergarten and wincing at the memory of potty training. As extremely unsexy thought as there ever was, he thinks with a grimace and then attempts to… manoeuvre himself into position. "Just point and aim."

It's weird, and very… fleshy. But at least the rest of the operation is roughly the same for a man as it is for a woman - bladder is a bladder, apparently. It's still weird - as is not needing to wipe afterwards. It doesn't feel like it's enough, to just shake it. Not that there's anything to wipe with in the outhouse.

"Weird, weird, this is so weird," Van mutters, shaking himself and then quickly tucking the weapon away.

There's nowhere to wash his hands afterwards.

"Great," he mutters and then slinks back to the barn where he sleeps at night. His mirror water turns into hand washing water, and he still feels a bit dirty afterwards. He's hyperaware of what's going down below the belt, all of a sudden. Also, maybe getting a bit hard? Is it really that damn easy to get riled up as a man? Van's not even thinking of anything sexy, and apparently it's going up on its own. What the hell?

Climbing up to the hayloft, Van lies down and tries to not think about his dick. He's got an existential crisis on his hands. Woman stuck in a man's body here. This is no time for any kind of self-inflicted fun times. He needs to experience the horrors of being not in a body of his own. Her own. Whatever. Body dysmorphia, here we go!

Yeah, no, apparently not. His mind keeps slipping downwards along with the blood pooling there, as though the damn thing has a gravity of its own. He can feel his penis straining his underwear - taking it out, putting his hand around it, it would feel… probably pretty good right now. And it's not like Katie doesn't want to - like she hasn't been curious what it was like, how it would work. Porn and smut painted a pretty vivid image, of course, but nothing beats hands on experience.

Mmm, hands on…

Van stares at the ceiling for a long moment, biting his lip. There's no one in this end of the barn but him. The Gylcrosses are in their house, Josel is off in his little hutch… there's no one here. No one but him.

… Right, okay. Fine.

With a grunt Van gets up to find a rag or something.

It would clear his head too, probably, if all the post nut clarity memes are to be believed. He would have his existential crisis with a clear mind afterwards.

-

Katie wakes up the next morning to the cock crowing somewhere outside and has a moment of flailing confusion at the feel of all the hay around her and sight of the wooden ceiling and beams above her head… before everything comes back.

Right. She's still here. She's transmigrated into Van and to the very start of Age of Tales. And it's now day two.

"Shit," Van murmurs, running a hand down his face. His chin feels bristly - apparently that's a yes on the needing to shave going forward, if he wants to keep Van's chiselled chin in view. Which is probably not all that important, considering that, well…

Tonight, the plot would finally kick off in earnest.

Breathing in and out for a moment, Van lets his arm drop to his side. He hadn't even thought of what he would do, beyond the usual. Even with all the dramatic consequences, the Rift opening was still part of the tutorial, and so all the enemies were pretty low level. The character was meant to run, of course - at this point there was not much they were supposed to be able to do against them.

Emphasis on the supposed. This is, however, Age of Tales.

The whole tutorial section is a bit… Well, overall, Katie gets it - the whole point of the tutorial section is to paint the illusion of peaceful normalcy and introduce the player to the base mechanics and the NPC shops before the plot can kick off and burn the whole idyllic place to the ground for shock value. The first time Katie went through it, it was pretty epic, overall.

But giving the players the chance to shop before the fight was kind of dumb.

Because, while the game didn't get that popular, it had some players, and just about everyone who did play it went about the tutorial the same way. They gambled for cash and kitted themselves out as best they could as soon as they could… and in so doing, turned the whole Rift thing into a bit of a joke by actually standing up against the invasion, something they plot-wise weren't supposed to be able to do. And most of them didn't even realise it, breaking the game completely by accident.

And when you went about it perfectly intentionally, well… the Rift stopped being a threat at all and became the perfect spawn kill camp.

That was what Van had been planning to do - until reality nerfed Katie's money-making tricks.

"System, open inventory," Van calls.

[Inventory] [Simple Knife, lvl. 1] [Shepherd's Slingshot, lvl. 1] [14 x Basic Stone Ammunition ] [3 x Spearhead] [1 x Apple] [Empty Jug] [Dirty Rag]

Yeah, not exactly winning starter gear, especially considering that he still doesn't have a single shred of proper armour. He hasn't been this poorly prepared for the Rift since the very first playthrough - and even then he at least had some armour and a sword! Reality is really kicking his ass this time.

He can't figure out if it's frustrating or exciting. Probably the first one.

"Guess I'm making some spears," Van muses and then sits up with a grunt. Finger-combing the hay out of his hair, Van eyes the dirty rag and then winces. He would need to get rid of it, and maybe he could wash up somewhere before getting started. Unfortunately, he doesn't think there's a washroom or anything around here…

[Farm Chores, Lvl. 1.] [It's a new day on Gylcross farm, and it's time to get to work!]

[Farm Chores 1, Lvl. 1.] [Let the chickens out.] [Let the goats out.] [Let the cows out.] [Let Bell out.] [Quest reward:  10 exp, 3 Apples.] [Farm Chores 2, Lvl. 1.] [Muck the pens and stalls.] [Quest reward:  10 exp, 5 Fresh Eggs.] [Farm Chores 3, Lvl. 1.] [Take a look at the garden and weed Ms. Janelle's vegetable beds.] [Quest reward:  10 exp, 4 x Mixed Herbs] [Farm Chores 4, Lvl. 1.] [Milk the goats and the cows.] [Quest reward:  2 exp, 1 Bottle of Milk.] [Accept?] [Yes.] [No.]

Van winces a little at the sudden bombardment of pop-ups. Looks like he has some work to do. How much it all will matter when this time tomorrow the farm will be in ruins aside… exp is exp. And if he could squeeze in another level up before the Rift, it definitely wouldn't hurt.

Standing up - and bending over to duck below the ceiling beams - Van shuffles to the ladder to start the day with a quick rinse in a bucket of cold water.

By the time he heads out of the barn, Janelle has breakfast ready and set in front of the farmhouse. "Good morning, Van!" she calls, waving. "Come have some eggs and pancakes!"

Josel is already there and already stuffing his face with eggs. "Good morning," Van greets them both and then asks, interestedly, "Pancakes?"

"Yeah - Daddy bought flour and sugar yesterday!" Janelle says excitedly. "We've got some honey too - come here and try it."

Van does, sitting down beside Josel, accepting his share with a, "Thank you, miss." It looks great, and it smells even better.

"It's Janelle," the farmer's daughter says firmly and sits down across from him.

The breakfast is great, as are the pancakes. Mr. Gylcross doesn't make an appearance, but no one comments on it, and so Van doesn't either - maybe the man sleeps in when it's not a market day, or something. After they're done eating, Josel helps Janelle clear out the table, while Van considers his quests.

"Are you going to let the animals out?" Janelle asks, wiping her hands in her apron. "I'll come with you - I'll collect the eggs while I'm at it."

"Sure," Van agrees and offers Josel an apologetic nod before following Janelle towards the chicken coops.

It's a perfectly pleasant day, with only a few fluffy clouds in the sky and just the barest hint of a breeze in the air. The sort of day when nothing bad is supposed to happen, of course. Perfectly normal day.

"Daddy says you visited the tailor yesterday," Janelle comments. "That you ordered some kind of armour."

Van blinks and looks at her. "Uh, I didn't realise he knew about that," he says. The man hadn't mentioned it. How did he find out, anyway? "I did, yeah."

"Why?"

Well, there's going to be a battle in Westbrook the day after tomorrow, and then the place is going to be set on fire, and Valthor's most annoying minion is going to make a grand appearance. Van is really hoping to curbstomp that guy's smug little face to the ground, and armour would make that much, much easier. "Well," he says, because clearly he can't say any of that. "I don't know. Just felt like it, I guess?"

Janelle looks at him carefully, and asks, "Have you… remembered something?" she asks. "About your past?"

Van hesitates, because in the game the player character never remembers time before the farm - but he does learn about it from others. "No, not really," he says finally. "I just… have a feeling I'm going to need something. Actually," he adds and takes a spearhead out of the satchel. "I also got a few of these."

Janelle accepts the dull spearhead, tilting her head with confusion. "Is that a weapon?"

"Head of a spear - I'm going to find some pole to stick it on," Van says and shrugs. "And then I'll have a spear."

Janelle shakes her head, looking a little upset. "But what do you need a spear for?" she asks.

Van shrugs again. "I don't know. It just feels like something I should have."

Janelle hums unhappily, turning the spearhead in her hand. "So, I was right," she murmurs and looks at him sadly. "You are a soldier."

In the game you learn the main character's background in flashbacks and  hints from the designated Mentor character at Ulgor's Camp, but it's a pretty cliché dealio overall. The player character has amnesia - of course - and was left at the Gylcross farm by a Mysterious Hooded Person - of course - while the Mysterious Hooded Person ran away all suspicious-like. Janelle Gylcross eventually found the player character hiding in the barn hayloft, all confused and out of it and bleeding from the head. Through some interrogation and arguing with her father, Janelle got him settled in as a new farm hand.

It's all shown to the player in this grainy sepia cut scene, a collage of moments as the player character learns how to swing a hoe and milk the cows and stuff. It's pretty wholesome. And the fact that it's shown to you only after the farm has been burned down and everyone there was killed, well… Katie has some issues with the arrangement of narrative there, but it was kind of a punch to the gut, the first time she played the game.

Also absolutely hilarious, watching this brick shithouse of a man do these cute farm chores, like carrying baby lambs around, delicately harvesting berries from the bushes and weeding garden beds.

"I'm not a soldier," Van says and accepts the spearhead back. "I just feel like it'll be better to be prepared than not."

"Right," Janelle says and hugs herself, looking uncomfortable. "Are you going to leave the farm? I know Daddy only contracted you until the harvest, but… I thought you liked it here."

"Well… it is nice," Van says. And it really is. He looks at the farmstead around them and hums thoughtfully. It's very peaceful and idyllic and wholesome. In the game it's often implied how much the player character wishes he could've stayed there, wishes none of the terrible things that followed wouldn't have happened, and the world could've stayed as it was.

More than another day of it and Katie would be climbing the walls, bored out of his mind.

"I guess we'll see," Van says and smiles at Janelle. "You never know what will happen."

-

[<<Prologue | <Chapter 4 || Chapter 6>>] Proofread by @nimadge, many thanks

-

I call this the Tool Inspection Chapter. And I hope it made at least one person laugh as much as it made me to write it.

[red-moon-at-night]

I find it so SO interesting that as soon as Kazui's breaking their marriage vows and revealing his true feelings (literally tearing apart the dove), the wife is already falling off the balcony

Her hair is fluttering in the wind. The apple fucking splatters on the ground this whole sequence is so visceral I'm spinning it around in my mind. Kazui views his truth telling as a violent act, the killing blow.

[giddlygoat]

i haven’t planked in months and i was worried that i would fall over within seconds so i used the lazytown theme song of all things to time myself. i planked for over a minute straight! maybe not much but i’m proud of it since my personal best is like 2 minutes. then i did 5 pushups and 10 sit-ups [my old daily routine] and was just as pleasantly surprised to see it wasn’t that bad! call me autistic but the lazytown binging is working on me. this is for you, sportacus 🫡

[queerofthedagger]

if windows 11 has one hater etc etc

[transmasc-rose]

One more AU to propose: at the end of Brotherhood, taking ac3's declaration of how the Apple works as fact, Desmond sees the satellite not working, sees Abstergo failing--and rather than kill Lucy, either manages to turn and kill no one (unlikely, given Juno's influence) or ends up stabbing Shaun and/or Rebecca instead, with the idea that maybe, if he talked to the Templars, he could make them understand, that their plan is flawed, that they need to try something else--

Because if the Templars, in all their money and planning and resources are failing, how could the Assassins succeed?

(This would royally piss off Juno.)

I don't think this would go well. I think, even if he and Lucy succeeded, made the Templars change plans, and that worked, the result would be bittersweet at best. A lot of people dead or under their control, with the Assassins being in an even worse state. Power granted to the Templars that make them rise even higher.

There's a good chance they don't succeed at all.

But he'll never know if things would go better if he'd chosen the other path.

(Maybe there's a world where he does convince the Assassins and Templars to work together on this. But that's a much kinder world than the games see fit to give him. So that is out of his grasp.)

[icewindandboringhorror]

Misc. photos from the past year or so ~

[evenmorecrows]

kieran is my little guy. my boy my son. maybe i Am rotating an au in my head where hes the datv protag. maybe he enters into a romance with lucanis. like father like son (his dad being m!amell who romanced zevran.) plus itd be. so fucking funny

[bibleofficial]

if trump actually does put tariffs on fuckin everything that could be very good for america in the long run tbf

[eegasleega-will-change-this-l8r]

Prophecy Rambling

So a while ago I wrote this fic about Giygas and the Apple of Enlightenment, based on this neat bit in one of the japanese guidebooks detailing a conversation between them

Recently I took it down because I've been thinking more about the Apple and the Prophecy and my ideas surrounding both have become wayyyyy more complicated than what I had in mind at the time (it also just needed some rewrites anyway but that's beside the point ><)

Earlier today I rambled at @commandernachos for about half an hour trying to put everything together, so without further ado, here's my current thoughts about the Apple, Buzz Buzz's prophecy, and the confusing time travel shenanigans involved in Ness's adventure!

(note that as per usual, this is firmly personal headcanons, not strict analysis)

Right so, my fic had a pretty simple premise: Giygas asks the Apple of Enlightenment, a super advanced machine able to predict the future, to tell him how his invasion unfolds The Apple informs him that not only does he fail, he'll be totally destroyed by a boy named Ness Outraged, Giygas tries to find some way to alter the course of the future, and lands on corrupting Porky into helping him, against the Apple's advice And so this leads into the end of Earthbound, where Porky is an unexpected wrench in everyone's plans (The Apple of Enlightenment couldn't predict this.)

So that's all neat and orderly, BUT I was neglecting some crucial things For one thing, while I was drawing from that Giygas/Apple conversation thing, I was totally ignoring the legend from the actual game:

When the chosen boy reaches the point, he will find the light. The passing of time will shatter the nightmare rock and will reveal the path of light.

Which was very much on purpose, because it's weird and super confusing. Plus it's radically different from how the Apple gives its predictions in the guidebook convo and my fic, so I didn't wanna bother figuring out how to reconcile it with them. That being said, it's a pretty huge thing to ignore, and it's been nagging at me ever since!! so here we are.

But, that aside, there's another thing I didn't consider! Which is how Giygas wins!!

So, along with the legend, Buzz Buzz tells us that he's from a future (10 years after 199X) in which Giygas succeeded, and everything was destroyed At a glance, this is easy to rationalize:

Apple predicts Ness will destroy Giygas

Giygas snatches up Porky to mess up the Apple's prediction

Porky's presence allows Giygas to win and destroy everything (presumably by turning off the Devil's Machine and unleashing Giygas's full power, like at the end of the game)

But this begs the question: why are Ness and his friends able to defeat Giygas in the game's timeline? What changes???

So what I've landed on all hinges on one thing: the Apple's prophecy and Buzz Buzz's legend are two different things. Both predict Ness's role as the hero and Giygas's death, but they're both separate things. As the Apple states in its conversation with Giygas, "The results of temporal interference cannot be prophecized." It can only predict the outcome of the unaltered timeline, which never came to pass. The legend, meanwhile, is something ancient, predating Giygas, able to transcend his meddling with time.

So basically, we're left with three different timelines. I imagine this is all pretty convoluted, so here's a handy little chart I made which I think simplifies everything pretty nicely:

How I imagine things play out:

Unaltered Timeline: Buzz Buzz never arrives, so neither the sound stone nor the sanctuaries are in play. Ness goes on journey of his own accord, things play out much more smoothly without Porky's interference (Paula is never kidnapped, for instance). Giygas is never released from the Devil's Machine, and is defeated without ever using his full power or destroying his mind. All goes according to the Apple's prophecy.

Porkified Timeline: Giygas, fearing the above outcome, corrupts Porky to his side. Porky gives Ness much more trouble on his journey, but he is able to make it to Giygas as before. Porky disobeys Giygas and disables the Devil's Machine, allowing Giygas to destroy the Chosen Four and begin mindlessly devouring the rest of reality. Buzz Buzz, knowing the ancient legend, travels back in time to bring it about.

Earthbound Timeline: Well, you know how this one goes.

One thing I have difficulty reconciling though, is that despite the changes Buzz Buzz brings with him, it's NOT Ness who destroys Giygas in the end! Why does Ness fulfilling the prophecy, gathering the power of the earth, overcoming the evil parts of himself in Magicant, becoming more powerful than he ever could've been otherwise, ...allow Paula to destroy Giygas? What was different in Giygas's altered timeline that prevented Paula from doing the same thing then? This is something I don't have an answer for :/

So it seems I still need to do some more brainstorming. But in the meantime, those are all my ideas about this! Hope it's not too confusing to wrap your head around ^^ And man that fic is gonna be so much more complicated whenever I get around to rewriting it haha

[grimbeak]

took an Adderall also so I'm not tired tonight bc I don't wanna go to sleep. Which will surely not affect me negatively later