#one of the biggest reasons I don't buy women's shoes

[naomitours]

Tromsø, Norway: The North Above the North

I am not a "cold-weather" person, both in personality and in personal inclination. So you might wonder why someone like me would go to Norway in December. And if you asked me this after I actually got there, it would've been a damn good question! But I had a single reason, and a good one:

That's right, I went to see the northern lights. The green lady. "A-AURORA BOREALIS??", in the words of Superintendent Chalmers. People much smarter than me say this is caused by the sun's upper atmosphere emanating a solar wind that reaches *our* upper atmosphere. While not the most consistent place in the world to see it, Tromsø is one of the easiest and largest to try your luck.

Disclaimers from the Top of the World

The first thing you should know about Tromsø is that the sun doesn't come up for most of winter. You'll have light for a few hours, sure, but it's not the same. The meaning of darkness is different when it's ever-present, and those brief few hours of light mean everything. I found myself wanting to shed my coat and soak the light in through every pore of my body.¹ Depression is a real problem here, so is alcoholism. (I was even told by a local that they track alcohol purchases via card, to make sure nobody is drinking too much in the dark months!)²

The "sunset" over the Tromsø harbor, 1:35 PM.

The second thing you should know is that you need traction on your footwear. Pack your snow boots, or buy some shoe spikes because otherwise you'll be spending a good chunk of your time here on the ground, cursing the ice. My dumb-ass had decided to come to Norway on a whim, without thinking or preparing, so I showed up in my Doc Martens slipping and sliding. I almost couldn't make it to my Airbnb, my host having to come down and help me up the hills!! Thankfully I was able to borrow boots from my, again, incredibly lovely host³, but my god you've never appreciated gravel so much!

The Tromsø Troll Museum

That's right, the main attraction in the city, the reason you flew hundreds, perhaps even thousands of miles! This tiny museum with a bunch of trolls scattered all around!

It's a cozy space, and if you're as fascinated as mythology as I am, it's really a must-see if you're in town. Also, there's a replica of a hulder. According to local lore, these were beautiful women who would often try to lure men away from their human homes, to live in otherworldly pleasure with them⁴, or they would marry human men and join our world, retaining their otherworldly strength⁵!

Aurora Borealis

The biggest disclaimer I'd offer for the northern lights is this, you are never guaranteed to see them, even if you do everything "right". This was such a huge source of anxiety for me until I finally had a good sighting, then I was able to relax. I recommend doing some guided tours, these are not necessary (I saw them once right outside my Airbnb!) but it's going to maximize your chances by getting you away from the city's light pollution. There's many different modes of transportation for this, I myself took a bus and a boat, but I saw advertisements for planes, helicopters and even dog sleds*. The first time I ever witnessed the northern lights was on a sleepy little boat tour, New Year's Eve 2023.⁶

The interior was very cozy, more importantly it was warm, essential on a night with subzero wind chill. I enjoyed cookies and coffee and hot chocolate with marshmallows!

The lights don't look like the pictures, that should be stressed. The vast majority of aurora borealis photos are taken via long-exposure, and our eyes just don't work the same way. But on a good night you can see a faint green distortion in the sky, as if a riff into another dimension. It's like you expect an alien spaceship, or the giant hand of a monster to come ripping out of it, changing our world forever.⁷ But for the natives of Tromsø, it's just a day like any other.

View of the Aurora Borealis, from my Airbnb the next day.

I also recommend booking a few different tours, if you're like me and only really need to see it once, many will let you cancel on 24hrs notice if you pay extra. I recommend this as a good way to save money, but I'm kinda a cheapskate, so what do I know?

Also, please don't be discouraged if you don't see the lights on any given tour, you still do get some really beautiful photographs. It's important to keep a sense of relativity about you, you are standing at the top of the world, in the freezing cold. And in this moment you are having a novel human experience, regardless of whether or not you see some pretty lights on top of it.

What I Ate

Now, you might think the food is very bare-necessities in this sleepy arctic city, but you'd be surprised! One of the first things I had was something I had actually failed to find in Oslo, a delicious Norwegian donut called a skolebolle:

With a custard center and coconut flakes trimming the top, it's a deliciously sweet treat that I found in a Eurospar for the equivalent of a dollar. I recommend enjoying it with black coffee! Not pictured are the other things I got from the store, including paprika-flavored potato chips (highly recommended) and a large bar of Freia milk chocolate, which you'll not be disappointed by.

There's also an abundance of little convenience stores that will get you hot meals for relatively cheap (Northern Europe is expensive!) On the right you'll see a pepperoni calzone that was pretty good, along with a Norwegian soda that was less so. But if you're looking for a finer taste of Tromsø, stay with me:

This is a sampling I did of Aquavit, the signature liquor of Scandinavia. All of it was made right here in Tromsø, and I had a lovely guide for this tasting. To name a few, lingonberries and reindeer meat, not to mention a small slice of grapefruit.⁸ It's a little skimpy, however the point isn't to eat, but to taste!⁹

Conclusion/Takeaways

It can be a very scary thing, to be so far away from home. In all my years of travel, though that uncertainty has diminished, it never truly goes away. Maybe travel is just like any other experience, your tolerance to it builds until you only feel the original high when you get even further out of the world as you've known it. In this way, travel is much like a drug. But what moves me most about travel is its capacity to help us understand not just the planet we live on, but our own place within it. And if you ever feel lost for purpose, I might recommend standing on top of the world, hunting for otherworldly apparitions in the sky //

Footnotes:

¹ Of course, if you actually try to walk around in Tromsø without a coat, you will a)freeze to death and b)look stupid

² LITERALLY 1984

³ Of course, I had to return the boots when I left for the airport, meaning I fell not once, not twice, but THREE times trying to get down the hills to the bus stop. Seriously, you can't wear your Docs, no matter how fashionable and punk rock they are!

⁴ But why would you want to do that, when society is sooooooo good?? Like, who wants to live in a fantasy world where there is no suffering or want when we have Pizza Hut here, right now?

⁵ A hulder also features prominently on the cover of that one metal album by the murderous Nazi that your friend still listens to, despite knowing he's, you know, a MURDEROUS NAZI.

⁶ I would later go on to watch a man in lederhosen play The Weeknd, Cher, and at midnight ABBA's "Happy New Year", all on a keyboard. Dude was a one-man entertainment MACHINE, the vibe was immaculate.

⁷ As seen in Avengers 17: We Saved the World Again, in theaters this summer! Go watch it. Right now. The corporations demand it. DO IT. CONSUME.

⁸ Make sure your meds don't interact with grapefruit. Grapefruit may cause side effects including sour taste. Ask your doctor if grapefruit is right for you.

⁹ You know, like, a tasting menu or something!!

[ladyartichokie]

0-44 on the ask game. I'm nosy and even though I know the answer to several of those questions I'm not going to type out every single number individually.

(plz feel free to ignore this ask lol I don't seriously expect you to type all that out even tho I'd read it)

killing you killing you killing you

0: Height? 5'0"

1: Virgin? You know the answer to this

2: Shoe size? Anywhere from Womens 5 to 9

3: Do you smoke? Nope

4: Do you drink? Occasionally

5: Do you take drugs? Nope. But fun fact, I had to take painkillers when I was little and they altered my taste buds

6: Age you get mistaken for? Well when I was like 11-12 I would get mistaken for 16. Now I think most people assume I'm around 18 just because I'm in advanced classes? IDK though

7: Have tattoos? Nay, my liege

8: Want any tattoos? I have mixed feelings on the morality of tattoos, but I know what I would get if I were to get some

9: Got any piercings? Just basic lobe piercings. I'm currently trying to convince my parents to let me get a second lobe piercing

10: Want any piercings? Yes

11: Best friend? Arnold Schwarzenegger

12: Relationship status? Single/married to more people than I can count

13: Biggest turn ons? I'm not answering this. (voice.)

14: Biggest turn offs? I'm not answering this

15: Favorite movie? 10 Things I Hate About You, Much Ado About Nothing, The Princess Bride, The Italian Job

16: I’ll love you if... you don't make fun of me for being excited for something. Or if you tell me something reminded you of me.

17: Someone you miss? My fake grandfather

18: Most traumatic experience? I'm not answering this, bestie

19: A fact about your personality... I'm actually really good at giving advice. I wasn't even aware of this until I accurately predicted exactly what would happen to multiple of my friends/their relationships

20: What I hate most about myself... my pride. I have a massive ego because I'm really smart and I know it.

21: What I love most about myself... IDK man.

22: What I want to be when I get older... A Dominican Sister

23: My relationship with my sibling(s)... They're good! It hasn't always been like this, but we're getting better

24: My relationship with my parent(s)... Always good with my dad, iffy with my mom

25: My idea of a perfect date... Truthfully I don't know. My parents didn't date before they got engaged, so dating has always seemed kind of odd to me.

26: My biggest pet peeves... People who buy crocheted stuff from fast fashion stores. I hate fast fashion in general, but crochet can ONLY be done by a human, so it's basically guaranteed that you're buying the product of slave-labor.

27: A description of the girl/boy I like

28: A description of the person I dislike the most... I actually am really bad at disliking people. Every single person who I've met and started out disliking I eventually came to like for one reason or another.

29: A reason I’ve lied to a friend... uhhh. Boredom? IDK. I used to be a bit of a pathological liar, but I can't think of a recent lie I've told a friend

30: What I hate the most about work/school... bad seminars

31: What your last text message says... The most recent thing I sent someone (you) was "I did read 1.5 books from HTTYD"

32: What words upset me the most... huh, IDK. I can't think of any off the top of my head

33: What words make me feel the best about myself... This one is hard because I'm in this weird phase where I don't want my accomplishments recognized, and compliments in general frustrate me. I don't know why this is.

34: What I find attractive in women... Kindness that isn't wet-blanketness

35: What I find attractive in men... Warmness. Which, granted, sound like kindness but it isn't. (for legal reasons my answers to both this question and the previous one are purely platonic and subject to change)

36: Where I would like to live... a convent

37: One of my insecurities... My weight. I am going to the gym 2-4 times a week now, though, so I'm working on it.

38: My childhood career choice... a nun

39: My favorite ice cream flavor... Cookie Dough

40: Who wish I could be... a better person

41: Where I want to be right now... right where I am (that is, my bed)

42: The last thing I ate... a brownie

43: Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately... Dobby

44: A random fact about anything... I'm currently trying to figure out how to make a cross-stitch that captures the vibe of No Longer You from Epic the Musical

For the record, you already knew at least half of these so I truly don't know why I bothered doing this.

[horrorslashergirl]

I need any headcanons for Asa and/or Jesse, you can also add others if you want. Like stuff like their scent they're usual mood, how you can tell if they like you, stuff that people usually don't care about ya know?

I have to admit I wrote more than I intended too, but I think it came out pretty good. Some headcanons I debated from watching their movies I think over 20 times? Feeling like a detective. 

Random Headcanons

The Collector/Asa Emory

If I have to picture his scent I think he would have a combination of citrus, disinfectant, and dust; do you know how an old book smells, that rich smell of knowledge that is rather calming? That's how I picture him like. Why citrus/lemon/disinfectant? I headcanon Asa as a neat-freak so I think that would be a common scent for him, plus I don't think the flowery scents are his favorite when it comes to room air freshener.

Surprisingly, Asa knows how to dress, but doesn't care. He dresses according to where he goes; working at the university, working on his human collection. He is a more practical type. He never finds the need to dress to impress.

Asa is an introvert. His usual mood when he is his civilian self is one of pure calmness, maintaining a stoic facade, mostly so that people won't bother him. Now, he isn't a shy guy, more like socially awkward, and doesn't have the abilities of a social butterfly. He can learn to be but chooses not to. If someone tries to get under his skin, he will use his intellect to make said people feel like they're the dumbest and make them walk away in shame. As his Collector persona, he lets his inner demons free; the rage, the blood-thirst, he doesn't feel like he needs to maintain a facade anymore, because as the Collector, he is the master, the one who calls the shots.

If Asa likes someone he will never flat-out tell them or try to impress the said person. If you're a very observant person, you can catch him observing you from the distance, but as soon as you look at him, his gaze will move away from you. Asa likes to observe from the distance and there are many ways his liking to you can go; taking an interest in someone means the person will most likely end up being part of his collection like he sees a beautiful specimen and he knows they need to own them.

I picture Asa as having some sort of PTSD; nightmares, flashbacks can come when you trigger his past. That's probably one of the reasons he isn't so opened up to having someone care for him and trust them. The person who was supposed to love him unconditionally and be the guide in his life took everything away from him; his father we are talking about here. How can he trust someone who they admit that they love him when his father created him the monster that he is today?

He has some sleep problems, mostly because of how big of a workaholic he is. Working from morning to afternoon at the university then working all night on his collection can suck the life out of him. God bless the dark liquid called coffee.

The biggest characteristic of Asa is probably his intelligence and by all means, this man is a walking encyclopedia, not only on Entomology but also on other topics like history, art, and geography. Despite him being strong and intimidating with his stature, his intellect is the biggest weapon; a very good strategist and a master trap. You have to get the brains to make such things.

When it comes to relationships and you managed to somehow get into one with Asa, you need to understand that you have to take this man how he is, he will never change for the sake of someone. Don't question him, especially about his gruesome hobby. I picture a traditional housewife type would be the perfect shot for him, considering he isn't that much at home, someone has to clean the house and cook. I think everything in Asa's life is cold, metaphorically speaking, so coming home to finding his house immaculate and a warm home-cooked meal is a big treat, makes him feel loved and without you being a too push-over and annoy him. Give him his space and be there when he needs it.

Chromeskull/Jesse Cromeans

When it comes to Jesse's scent, I think it would go two ways or a combo of the two. The scent of metal, medical solutions plus adding some expensive male cologne, tobacco, and rich alcohol fragrance is what this man smells like. It's quite intoxicating and makes you feel a little dizzy, but that's Jesse's intentions, like a drug you're getting addicted to.

Looks are everything for this man, despite his face being turned into the horrors today, he makes a very good impression with designer clothing, perfectly polished Oxford shoes, and perhaps a Rolex? Cars are like accessories, the flashier the better. Why not a Chrysler, maybe a Jaguar? Perhaps a Rolls Royce? Cars exhume power and by Gods, Jesse loves the power. If you have the money why not buy the finest things life has to offer?

Jesse is an extrovert and when he enters a room is like a panther is stalking the room, looking for the next victim. He is no shy guy and likes to make his thoughts known by all means; signing, electronic reader? He has many ways. His moods wary, depending on the situation at hand and they come in all kinds of forms. Jesse can go from playful and sassy to downright vicious and brutish. He is a big tease and loves to make people flustered; men or women, doesn't matter.

He has a dark sense of humor and that can be shown by just body language; the way that he teased Princess Gemstone with poking her head with his knife 'This piggy went to the market. This one stayed home.' Or when Princess Gemstone tried to save a bounded girl, but she runs away and Jesse waved his hand in a mocking 'bye-bye'.

He has a God-like complex, always the need to be in charge and that is shown when he killed Preston for trying to take the title as Chromeskull. Now, that's his style and Jesse doesn't like cheap copycats. Greedy, Jesse won't accept other people trying to steal his kills and get credit for his work. Just no.

A theory of mine is that Jesse is running a multi-million chroming company. The reasons? Chroming is very expensive and you can get a load of money from it. How do I know? One friend chromed the wheels of his car and the cheapest he found was 400 EURO. The process of chroming is not only expensive but also very dangerous and complicated. So, therefore, CASH! But also when you came tons of money from snuff films you got to have a business facade so people won't brown-nose into your shit. That's what people with illegal businesses do, a facade business to clean your dirty work.

A prime characteristic of Jesse is his ego, his PRIDE. His ego and misunderstanding other made him lose his face and also WIFE. He saw himself as invincible and he didn't even think about his wife when he started all this mafia-like organization. Just shows how selfish he can be in my opinion and like his wife said at the ending of Laid to rest 2 that she hadn't seen him for months and she was pregnant; Jesse thinks only for himself.

Talking about being in a relationship with Jesse? Here goes a nasty truthful headcanon; you will be his trophy wife, just an accessory for him, and having loyal pussy at his beck and call seems like a sweet treat. You will be spoiled rotten, but that will come with the price of being owned and feel like that. Say goodbye to freedom and the option of speaking your opinions. Now, Jesse wouldn't mind you play a feisty spitfire, all the more fun to see you crumble down in obedience into his arms. The only option you have is to be diplomatic and try to best yourself at playing mind games because if you don't at some point you will end up like his ex-wife.

How you can tell if Jesse likes you? Pretty hard considering he has a habit of being a huge flirt and womanizer, buuuuut...You might have a chance to be something more than a piggy or quick-fuck, if you show that you're more than the common-looking piggies. Be smart, be independent, show him that you won't drop on your knees and choke on his cock; don't be an easy catch, if you want to have him want you as his prime trophy.

[decaffeinatedfunbear]

Is Missguided Legit?

What is Missguided? Can they really help you save hundreds of dollars on groceries every month? What is Missguided? Is Missguided legit? These are some of the most common questions that people ask about MissGuided voucher codes and if they can really help you save hundreds of dollars with free next day delivery and other great offers.

Large Quantities

Missguided got started in 2007 as a direct marketing company to help consumers find the best grocery store deals. Today they have grown substantially and now offer many tools to help you save money and locate your favorite picks. Missguided uses an advanced technology to analyze the market and personalize your coupons so you always know where to shop. They also offer a full-size guide with shopping tips to get you started. This includes great tips for finding great deals on popular products like frozen dinners and French fries, and how to save money when you buy them in large quantities.

Best Prices

The biggest feature that sets Missguided apart from similar direct marketers is that they have worked with many popular retailers to create a unique shopping experience including a plus size clothing size locator, a phone coupon directory, a grocery-buying guide, and even an online recipe creator. You can also sign up for their weekly newsletters to get the latest deals on everything from cheap refrigerators to designer name brand apparel and shoes. With so much data at your fingertips, you can be confident that you will always find the best prices on the items you need.

Service Features

Unlike other direct marketers who offer "first come, first served" deals, you won't find this type of customer service with Missguided. However, this does not mean that their customer service is bad. In fact, I think their phone customer service is one of the best customer service features they offer.

Traditional or Vintage

One of my favorite features of Missguided is that they offer their members exclusive recipes and shopping guides that allow them to mix and match items for new-to-you shopping experiences. For example, a member who purchases plus size dresses and wears their pants at the same time will be saving money by purchasing two similar dresses instead of one large dress. As a result, Missguided offers its members many delicious recipes for traditional or vintage clothing using classic items like a floral print chemise and a shawl. The recipes are easy to follow and make a great addition to any list of items for new-to-you shopping.

Another reason that I think Missguided is legitimate is that it offers members real sizing charts. Unlike other direct marketers who do not understand that different people have different sizes. Missguided understands that the chart you receive will not be accurate because you are getting a pair of jeans rather than a pair of women's plus size clothing. Because of this, Missguided takes the extra time and effort to make sure the charts are accurate so that you know what size you are in. Because of this, many of their customers who find themselves back at the store trying to figure out what they need and want to find the service helpful.

Secure Shopping

One of the best parts of being a customer at Klarna and ISA is that they both have clearly offers. Clearpay is a payment system that allows you to pay your suppliers directly from your account without having to deal with money exchanges, currency conversions, or worry about check-cashing fees. ISA is no different; they offer customers free and secure shopping with a variety of secure credit cards. If you don't mind waiting a few days for your checks to clear, you can use a credit card and have money automatically deposited into your account. It's a win-win situation!

Conclusion:

Klarna and ISA stand out among other direct marketers because they offer free and easy ways for you to make money online and manage your business. By taking advantage of both free services and convenient payment methods, customers like yourself can eliminate much of the stress that comes with running a business. While many other direct marketers seem to only focus on one or the other, Klarna and ISA combine all of the best features of the two so that you get the most out of your efforts. By managing your orders and making use of free next day delivery, you will be able to manage your business more easily than ever before. Once you start getting more sales, you may even be able to use some of the profits to buy more products and services so that you can grow your business even further!

[simply--hopeful]

0-44, but you don't have to repeat from the last questions

0: Height 5foot nothing 1: Age 17 2: Shoe size 5 3: Do you smoke? Hell fucking no4: Do you drink? Sometimes 5: Do you take drugs? Nope6: Age you get mistaken for twelve all the time 7: Have tattoos? Nope8: Want any tattoos? I sure do and I’ll have some soon9: Got any piercings? Just my ears10: Want any piercings? Not really 11: Best friend? Ana 12: Relationship status single 13: Biggest turn ons biting 14: Biggest turn offs liars and just not being nice to others 15: Favorite movie can’t buy me love and the fast and furious movies 16: I’ll love you if... you listen to music with me 17: Someone you miss Ana and Taylor we are all so far away right now 18: Most traumatic experience ha I have plenty 19: A fact about your personality I’m a huge goof ball and I’m constantly making jokes 20: What I hate most about myself I don’t like the way I look 21: What I love most about myself my personality is pretty great I’m really funny22: What I want to be when I get older content but I’m going to be a surgeon 23: My relationship with my sibling(s) my brother and I are close my my older sisters don’t talk to me 24: My relationship with my parent(s) shit 25: My idea of a perfect date sitting in a parked car jamming 26: My biggest pet peeves ignorance and lying 27: A description of the girl/boy I like28: A description of the person I dislike the most a push over who thinks everything should just be handed to them and never fucking does their job and it pisses me off 29: A reason I’ve lied to a friend I try to always be honest with my friends but I lied about where I was the other day for the sake of Christmas 30: What I hate the most about work/school the old people that come in and are rude aka baby boomers31: What my last text message says “I done fucked up” 32: What words upset me the most you’re dumb 33: What words make me feel the best about myself when people say I’m a good person 34: What I find attractive in women everything women are beautiful 35: What I find attractive in men their sisters 36: Where I would like to live the beach 37: One of my insecurities that I’m not smart enough anymore 38: My childhood career choice doctor 39: My favorite ice cream flavor greentea 40: Who I wish I could be myself and be happy with everything about me 41: Where I want to be right now at the gym 42: The last thing I ate egg whites 43: Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately 44: A random fact about anything well about me is I love cars so much and random fact in general is that the only temperature that’s the same in Fahrenheit and Celsius is 40