#one day i will go through my thousands of songs and actually make them playlists

[omniblades-and-stars]

📻 peas peas peas for korak and crash ily

Korak:

Darkness shatters Rhythms changing Breathe new life If we come together When life's broken It can be remade

So now it's time to admit that I actually do not have playlists built up for Korak or Crash yet. But regardless, I've been going through my library, picking through songs and this one, despite being a very gentle song, reached out and hit me in the face with Korak feelings.

I really should probably post the story I wrote for Korak since I talk about it all the time, but his story is about losing everything he knows and loves during the Reaper invasion. His story is about building a new life with his daughter. For those that don't know, Korak is an RP character, and we've been exploring him learning to stop hiding his grief away, unsealing it and relearning how to do more than simply survive to the next day.

I also think it's fitting in name. Korak is a quietly spiritual guy. He prays to his own gods when things are quiet, when he's alone. But he also tries to keep Aumellio's beliefs close to his heart. Aumellio being his turian husband (well, they weren't married but for all intents and purposes they might as well have been), who died on Menae, defending his home planet in it's time of need. Korak finds himself asking the turian Spirits, as he understands them, to keep and guide Aumellio's Spirit.

Korak didn't get a funeral. All he has left of Aumellio are his memories, a picture, and what amounts to a scrap of cloth with the insignia from Aumellio's military company. So he does cling to the idea of spirits as one of the few connections he can keep in the aftermath of losing everything.

Crash:

I'm not a fucking third class citizen You can try all you want but you'll never have a grip on me

Bully all you want I'm building a foundation I respect where I am But also where I came from I adapt my ways But never my integrity You think I am afraid But I keep growing my dignity Respect motherfucker

I know often times when I talk about Crash, it's about how she's kind of a jovial jackoff who loves making sus food, drinking and gossiping with her friends. I usually mention how she takes care of her community, helping to arrange mutual aid, and she has definitely turned to violence to solve some of her community's issues (gang bullshit, slavers, that sort of thing.)

The thing about Crash though is that she has VERY strong feelings about authority figures (Aria, gang bosses, etc.) pushing little guys around just because they don't have the power to fight back. Crash makes herself a very loud nuisance against injustice.

Back in her younger days, she had a hair trigger when people talked down to her, or otherwise tried to tell her how she should be living her life. She's in a place now where she largely just doesn't give a shit what anyone thinks about what she's doing. But she will stand up to people who think someone else is lesser for any host of bullshit reasons assholes hang onto to justify what they do.

Anyways, I love Crash and I'm glad you do to.

||Send me a 📻 and the name of one of my OCs and make me scramble to find a song to share that I identify with them!||

[beeing1alive]

Cute headcanons with Tokyo Revengers boys Pt.3

f.t.: Mikey (Manjirō Sanō); Draken (Ken Ryūgūji); Mitsuya (Takashi Mitsuya); Chifuyu (Chifuyu Matsuno); Baji (Keisuke Baji); Takemichi (Takemichi Hanagaki); Angry (Souya Kawata), Smiley (Nahoya Kawata); Hakkai (Hakkai Shiba); Kazutora (Kazutora Hanemija)

Mikey's hands are always warm. No matter how warm or cold it is outside, his hands are always the same pleasant temperature. In winter you can always warm your hands on his. However, his hands are also warm in summer, which means that in summer you can just intertwine your little fingers.

Darken usually has to leave the house very early, which means he never really has time to talk to you in the morning. That's why he always sticks a note on the mirror in your bathroom. Every day it says something different, but usually something like: "Have a great day, be safe, I love you -Ken"

Mitsuya organises a photo shoot for the two of you every few months. One of these couple photo shoots, and it's always super fun, especially because he already knows all the photographers. The pictures that come out are always so cute, and he prints out the best of them and puts it in his wallet.

Chifuyu insists on showing and introducing you to every animal in the pet shop. After closing time, he walks through the shop with you hand in hand and enthusiastically shows you all the animals. After a few months, you know every animal by name and its characteristics. He just loves animals, but he loves you more, he just can't help it.

Baji has got it into his head that he wants to learn how to cook. That's why he suggested that you cook something together at least once a week. He would like to pursue this habit but sometimes he just can't make it, but at least one evening is always reserved (if he can't make it, he feels bad and brings you something from out of town)

Takemichi regularly puzzles with you. He just finds it super relaxing, he already enjoys doing puzzles on his own, but it's a thousand times better with you. You usually watch a film or listen to your favourite music on the side. He could spend hours doing it. Just not having to think about anything, with you close to him.

Angry has a playlist with you, which is full of your favourite songs. He always pays attention to what music you listen to and when he sees how much you enjoy a song, he will immediately add it to this playlist. When you listen to music together, he always puts this playlist on and seeing you enjoy every song makes his heart melt.

Smiley introduced you to his brother first. He just cares what Souya thinks of you because he knows that his brother has a much better sense for healthy relationships. His heart skips a beat when he sees Souya talking to you enthusiastically, his face relaxes a little and he nods to him, and even if Souya didn't like you, he would have loved you.

Hakkai always left one thing in your house when he was with you at the beginning of the meeting phase. Whether it was a hoodie or a packet of chewing gum, just to make sure you'd see each other again. He always made it look like it was accidental, but it never was. He just always wanted to see you again sometime.

Kazutora writes you poems. When he goes to class for you, he usually gets so bored that he starts scribbling sweet words for you on a random piece of paper. Sometimes his texts stretch over several sheets of paper, it's just so easy for him to write how he feels about you. Much easier than telling you, he prefers to show it.

Note: I hope you like it and my requests are open. If you want to read the other parts, here is P.t.1 and here is P.t.2 :3

Attention: The characters and the gif do not belong to me. All credits go to the actual owners. If you want anything to be changed or removed, please write to me.

[ladyiristheenchantress]

Techno Magic Crash Course

Hello World! (hehe)

Ive noticed a lack of information on techno-magic and what being a tech witch might entail! Tech magic is the use of modern-day technology in our magical practices! This can be a secular practice OR someone may pair other aspects of theology into it! There is also 'Technopaganism' which is the merge of neopaganism and digital magic. Some people may worship tech and its energy or some people simply use it as a tool for ritual magic!

In this post I wanted to showcase a few ideas to get you started in the tech practice! The first section being common tools, the second is common tech practices, and the last is about how to take steps into your new tech practice and advance forward!

First: The tools To get started here are some amazing apps people might get on their phones to carry magic anywhere

The Moon is an iphone based calander with a bunch of free information about the phases of the moon and even crystals and intentions related to the phase!

Rune reading on the Google Play Store this is a divination app in relation to runes!

Citrine Circle is a great crystal data base to keep track of crystal you either have or want to get

Time Passages is a free chart reader that will read your whole astrological chart!

Labrynthos is a free tarot app that not only gives you access to free tarot, oracle, and lenormand decks, but it teaches you how to read them

Next are physical or digital items you can use in your craft, I will go in more detail in the sections to follow!

Computers, phones, tablets

Mouse

Keyboards

Applications and websites

coding platforms

Second: The Practice

This section is all about creating ideas to use for your craft! This section is all about how to integrate common witchy things into your craft! There are thousands of ways to do this so it would be impossible for me to share every idea but hopefully, these get your creative juices flowing

Cleanse using music or beats you enjoy over a speaker

Use mechanical processes in your spells (for example your cars computer could be a green light charm if you hate waiting in red lights)

Create digital grimoires on places like notation or google docs

Create altars on places like Pinterest or sandbox games

Play video games with intentions, like tycoon games for prosperity and FPS for warding

Use autotune during chants to add more power to your voice

Use screens for scrying or intuition practices

Shufflemancy is when you shuffle through a playlist and get a song as a form of divination

Use the energy of a crystal on your screen if you don't physically have one

create digital sigils and hide them around your electronics

Learn a coding language and mess around with enchanting code

Third: How to move forward

So now that you have a few recommendations how can you advance? first research, check out some of these sources for even more information

Tech Magick for Digital Witches

Other Community tech posts

Wiki on technopaganism

Cyber Spell books (Note this was written in 2002 so it is very outdated, however it is actually one of the more recent ones I see online)

Now, Research is going to be the backbone of any practice, however, tech magic doesn't have definite rules so experimentation is going to be your best friend so here are my top tips

If you learn about a new practice ask yourself how you can make it digital (like crystals and the crystals in your phone)

Look deeper into the practice, as you explore how your computer works ask yourself 'why' frequently and question how things work

look into superstitions coders and virtual friends have in relation to computers, are they rooted in anything?

I think that is all for today friends! I hope you all enjoy and if you have any questions feel free to post them in the comments!

Tip Jar

[gayalanwake]

hey guys so I’m crazy

I KNOW NOBODY GAF i am hyperfixated with literally have no other outlet to unleash my Demons

okay so basically this isn’t like a “normal” playlist (i have one but it’s private as of rn)- it’s basically like. 2 songs per chapter. In order. like the first two songs are about chapter one, the next two songs are about chapter two, etc etc etc. HOWEVERRR I’m not adding songs for chapters that aren’t released, because they can give vague spoilers. HOWEVERRR (again) I went ahead and added the Chapter 10’s songs anyways for fun :3

im not done lol here is an analysis of every song so far bc again im hyperfixated to high hell and this took 15 hours to organize. HEART EMOJI

(Chapter One)

Welcome to Paradise:

WTP is obviously an ironic song.

Pay attention to the cracked streets

And the broken homes

Some call it slums, some call it nice

I want to take you through

A wasteland I like to call my home

Welcome to paradise

This doesn’t need explaining as to why it’s relevant to B&BH lmao. But if you view these lyrics through their perspectives, the song loses its ironic tone. This wasteland of theirs probably GENUINELY IS paradise for them. It’s kinda comedic.

However, in this song, the narrator is speaking to his mother, asking if she can hear him “whining” as well as “laughing.” And viewing that through B&BH’s perspectives adds the slightest bit of tension- a tension that is very relevant and that will be harder to hide as the story progresses.

Another thing- this song being the first on this playlist is also part of the irony, with “paradise” referencing the plot that’s about to unfold, which takes place nowhere near any kind of paradise.

Come Out and Play:

This song is supposed to initially come off as a nothing more than a reference to B&BH being deranged teenagers. And for the most part, it is. It’s placed in Chapter 1 for a reason: Nothing’s happened yet, this is just B&BH as we know them. AKA, deranged teenagers.

However! Some of the lyrics do hint at what’s to come.

It goes down the same as the thousand before

No one's getting smarter, no one's learning the score

Your never-ending spree of death and violence and hate

Is gonna tie your own rope, tie your own rope, tie your own...

Hey, man, you disrespecting me?

Take him out (you gotta keep 'em separated)

Hey, man, you talkin' back to me?!

Take him out (you gotta keep 'em separated)

Over and over and over again are B&BH going to fight each other because of- unbeknownst to them- their suppressed romantic feelings. and it’s frustrating to watch because their self-destruction is so clear and yet they remain blinded by and to their own dysfunction. This is symbolized in the song, where the narrator has called out the teenagers’ destructive behavior more than once but is continuously interrupted mid-sentence by the cycle of needless violence that never seems to end (is gonna tie your own rope, tie your own rope, tie your ownHEY!!!! MAN YOU TALKING BACK TO ME???). Nothing is getting through. Nobody’s learning.

But you probably shouldn’t separate them.

(Chapter Two)

Fat Lip:

Okay this one is not that deep LMAOOO. Unlike Come Out and Play, this one is purely about them being deranged teenagers, bc this chapter focuses more heavily on their antics.

All The Small Things:

This chapter plays out like any normal day for these characters, and because of that, it may seem like pointless. But what it’s meant to do is serve as a reference point (all of the first three chapters are, actually). What that means is that the more the plot and B&BH will spiral, these first 3 chapters are a reminder of what once was, and they go from funny to bittersweet.

ATST is about how while this chapter is more so slice of life, the “small things” are nevertheless really important to these two. AKA, this is their ten-thousandth uneventful day together, but they’re together, and that’s what they care about. I am making no sense . Fuck it we ball

(Chapter Three)

My Hero:

Reminder that Chapter 3 is the chapter when Beavis falls down the stairs and Butt-Head starts tweaking. This song is meant to be taken through Beavis’ perspective.

There goes my hero

Watch him as he goes

There goes my hero

He's ordinary

This song in the context of the fic appears to be nothing more than a sarcastic jab. Like wow Butt-Head what a great fucking hero you are. However, we know that as much as Beavis talks shit to Butt-Head, there is a very strong love within him. He will never admit it, but this guy IS his hero. This song is genuine, and Beavis doesn’t know it. We have genuine love that is being sarcastically sung. Have you guys caught on that im bad at explaining things. This is a lot better in my head

Where Are You Going:

Meanwhile! This song is through Butt-Head’s perspective!

I am no Superman

I have no reasons for you

I am no hero

Oh, that's for sure

But I do know one thing

Is where you are is where I belong

I do know where you go

That's where I want to be

see why i bolded those lines LMAO

He’s Beavis’s hero… but Butt-Head is no hero. He loves Beavis, but he is also an unhealed, traumatized victim of Joanna. He is terrifyingly emotionally stunted, violence is always his answer, and much, much more. I mean goddamn he was this close to KILLING Beavis in this chapter- not that it’s the first time either of them have tried to or have indirectly nearly caused each other’s demise and not given one singular fuck (except for the episodes Take A Bow and The Day Butt-Head Went Too Far). And in the song, the lyrics just straight up state this (again, I am no hero).

And like Beavis in the last song, these meaning of these lyrics are also something Butt-Head “doesn’t know.” At least, not consciously. He is no hero. He is cruel, borderline barbaric, oh, that’s for sure. But the love he has for Beavis is literally life-defining. Where you are is where I belong, no matter where that is, even if it’s in hell. This song represents Butt-Head’s constant psychological battle between the love he feels and the person he was abused into becoming. (Note: this symbolism can also be applied to Beavis).

(Chapter Four)

Highway to Hell:

haha look it’s the guy named butthole’s song

I’ll try to keep this one short. This song is referencing their antics at the beginning of the chapter (aka, robbery LMAO). But… also… they are literally on a highway to hell, since at the end of the chapter is the cuddling scene that sets everything off.

I’m So Into You:

not a lot to say here either! I actually already talked about this song before (on a post I cannot find! eye twitching). The lyrics are self-explanatory.

I'm so into you

I don't know what I'm gonna do

Boy, you got me so confused

I don't know what I'm gonna do

The song is also about pining for a man who is already in a relationship, which is fitting, since this is the chapter where Butt-Head meets Hannah.

(Chapter Five)

So Much To Say:

I have also spoken about this song before! And while it’s mentioned in Chapter Seven, it’s referencing the events in Chapter Five, which is why I made it Ch. 5’s song. Okay anyways

I say my hell is the closet, I'm stuck inside

haha get it. gay. okay anyways

Can't see the light

Keep it locked up inside

Don't talk about it

T-T-Talk about the weather

Yeah, yeah, yeah

What were they doing in Chapter Five again??? Ohh yeahhh keeping their feelings abt the prior night locked up inside and talking about the weather instead. It’s simple and straight-forward but fits so perfectly i love it so much lmao

Take On Me:

okay so I will be completely honest here. I stole the idea of using this song for emo reasons from The Last of Us 2 LMAOOOOO

Youtuber TLOU Explained did a beautiful analysis video on the relationship between Ellie and Dina, the game’s main characters. In one scene, Ellie sings an acoustic version of “Take On Me” to Dina, and TLOU Explained describes the song’s meaning as this,

“I also think the lyrics of this song are especially poignant, summarizing Ellie and Dina’s relationship in just one line. Ellie sings, ‘Take me on,’ including all of her grief and baggage, everything that she is now, which Dina has already shown that she’s willing to do and will do for as long as she can. Ellie sings, ‘I’ll be gone in a day or two,’ and tragically, in two days from now, the Ellie that Dina knows and loves will be gone.”

I’m only mentioning this because that video is what made me realize what the writers of The Last of Us 2 were doing- what these lyrics, sung in an upbeat tone, can symbolize in a more tragic way. And I don’t want people to think I came up with the idea of using “Take On Me” in a serious way because i absolutely did not LMAO (Note: I wouldn’t do this if this story was an original project. This is just a fanfiction, so I don’t mind taking inspiration from The Last of Us 2 so directly).

Anyways, this song is meant to represent the end of Chapter Five, when Beavis finally recalls what happened the night before and is wrestling with the weight of it all. Using such a fun song seems ironic, but 1) I am a sucker for upbeat songs playing during dramatic moments (i.e., the song “Our Love” in Episode 2 of Arcane). 2) Like I already explained, the lyrics mean more than they appear.

In the context of the fic, the verse, “Take me on,” is a dare. It’s a dare to both characters. Take on what happened between us. I dare you. I dare you to take on what it means to be in love with someone like me. Take me on.

I'll be gone

In a day or two

(Chapter Six)

Bullet With Butterfly Wings:

While both characters can work with this song, this chapter is about Butt-Head being more awful than usual to Beavis, who is trying his best to get back to normal. So, this song is about Beavis.

The world is a vampire

Sent to drain

And Butt-Head is Beavis’ world.

(I feel like the rest of the lyrics don’t really need explaining lmao)

Smile Like You Mean It:

Not too much to say here! The title of the song alone pretty much sums it up. These two (Beavis, especially) are trying to act like everything is okay, but it’s not. They’re “smiling,” but they’re not meaning it.

(Chapter Seven)

In The End:

Once again, this song was mentioned in Chapter Eight, but it’s about Chapter Seven, so that’s why it’s here.

This one is basically Beavis’ breaking point. He’s tried and tried and tried to get things back to normal, and Butt-Head is being everything but cooperative. The last song, “Smile Like You Mean It” is like his final Hail Mary, he’s demanding himself to “smile” like he means it. But in “In The End,” he’s completely given up on trying to fix things. Well, not really. We know that Beavis would never actually give up on Butt-Head. But emotions are high, he’s pissed, and Butt-Head is continuously making everything worse.

How long will he last

Before he's a creep in the past

And you're alone once again?

Will you pop up again

And be my special friend

'Til the end?

And when will that be?

I figured out what you're all about

And I don't think I like what I see

So I hope I won't be there in the end

If you come around

No More Like That:

This song is through Butt-Head’s perspective, and it’s almost a whiplash. The song is a slow, depressing ballad, which is 1) in stark contrast to the prior song, and 2) doesn’t match Butt-Head at all. But it’s representing how Butt-Head put himself aside at the end of this chapter to try to fix things with Beavis. The song is different, and so is Butt-Head’s behavior.

You know you're breaking my heart

And I'm coming apart

Calling in sick

(Chapter Eight)

Hook:

oooo one of my favorites lmao

Okay, so if you’re unaware of this song, its point is that it’s pointless. These are literally the lyrics:

It doesn't matter what I say

So long as I sing with inflection

That makes you feel I'll convey

Some inner truth or vast reflection

But I've said nothing so far

And I can keep it up for as long as it takes

And it don't matter who you are

If I'm doing my job then it's your resolve that breaks

Because the Hook brings you back

I ain't tellin' you no lie

The Hook brings you back

On that you can rely

In the context of this fic, it’s meant to call attention to how this is pretty much the state Beavis and Butt-Head are in right now. Sure, they’re no longer fighting, but have they… actually resolved anything? They didn’t directly confront the issue, and more so swept everything under the rug in an attempt to get things back to how they were. They’ve said nothing so far, but the hook brings them back, the hook being the somewhat familiarity that has returned. It doesn’t matter how shaky or unstable it is, it’s familiar, it’s the hook, and it keeps bringing them back. It doesn’t matter what they say, as long as they sing with inflection. You get it lmao. This is a banger song btw i highly recommend it

Mt. Washington:

This one is about the end of the chapter, where Beavis has a breakdown over his mother.

Face stained in the ceiling

Why does it keep saying?

I don't have to see you right now

I don't have to see you right now

This part is literal. Beavis literally stares at the ceiling the entire night instead of sleeping.

Digging like you can bury

Something that cannot die

We could wash the dirt off our hands now

Keep it from living underground

This is a call to how Beavis has suppressed everything about his mother. What she has done, what she has not done, Shirley herself. Shirley cannot die, yet Beavis keeps digging.

Lazy summer goddess

You can tell our whole empire

I don't have to see you right now

I don't have to see you right now

“Goddess” being Shirley, for she is weirdly like a divine figure to him. She has hurt him over and over again, telling him, “I don’t have to see you right now,” and yet he clings onto her.

The rest of the song repeats the verse, I don’t have to see you right now. The instruments get louder, the singer starts shouting, everything starts getting faster. It’s like a spiral. Beavis is spiraling.

(Chapter Nine)

Here Before:

This one is Van Driessen’s relationship to Beavis and Butt-Head and how he sees their mothers in everything they do, how they have been here before.

Once I had a child

He was wilder than moonlight

He could do it all

Like he'd been here before

This is about Beavis and Shirley. Wilder than moonlight (Interesting… moonlight isn’t that wild). He could do it all. She could do it all.

Then I had a child

Took his while like northern summer

And he knows it all

Like he's been here before

This is about Butt-Head and Joanna. Took his while like northern summer. He knows it all. Joanna knew it all (We see this trait in the way she talks to Van Driessen in the Chapter 8 flashback) (And of course, in reality, Butt-Head and Joanna do not know it all. It’s the exact opposite. But in their minds, it’s very true).

Somethin’ Stupid:

And of course, the love ballad between a man and a woman is about Butt-Head and Hannah. orrrrrrr is it LOL

The time is right, your perfume fills my head

The stars get red, and, oh, the night's so blue

And then I go and spoil it all

By saying somethin' stupid like, "I love you"

Something interesting here, is why would saying, “I love you,” spoil anything? The narrators are clearly in love. They are on a date, singing fondly of the experience and of one another. But in the context of the fic, as we know, Hannah saying, “I love you,” does. spoil. everything.

And the sentence repeats itself, over and over again. It’s a sweet, genuine echo in Hannah’s head. But for Butt-Head, the echo is a slow, suffocating realization.

"I love you"

"I love you"

"I love you"

"I love you"

aaaaaaand unless I’ve been executed by the state i will go off about the rest of the songs when the chapters are released. BUH BYEEEEEEEEEE

[rimouskis]

omg now all i want to know is everything about your music taste. what do u like. how do u curate playlists or do u listen only straight thru albums? if you had to pick your five favorite genres and one song from each genre, what songs and genres would u pick? what genre do you feel like u listen to the least? the most ? what's the three most fascinating albums you've ever listened to. i need to know 🫧🎶

I sincerely believe the question is more “what DON’T I like”!

Alright this is a fun way to spend my Friday night in after walking 8 miles today and then doing dinner with friends ahahah so 1. Thank you for this and 2. Let’s go through this point by point:

1. What do I like? Man… I like a lot of music. I’ve gone through phases in my life: I was raised on my dad’s love of 80s/90s rock (think INXS, U2, Melissa Etheridge, Peter Gabriel), I discovered KISS FM in middle school and was a fiend for Top 50 pop then (the pussycat dolls were my everything back then lol isn’t it hilarious that I didn’t figure out I was gay until my 20s. also timbaland was consistently on my favorite songs.)

then in seventh grade I did a heel turn and got really into metal after my older cousin lent me his iPod at thanksgiving (I really liked Disturbed’s album Ten Thousand Fists)... then within the same year I did an even MORE hilarious, second heel turn and discovered K-pop, which I lived & breathed for like two years (my favorite band was SHINee; I still sometimes pop into the K-pop world to sample what’s coming out these days, though I don’t know the new generation of bands well).

THEN in high school the indie alt pop phenomenon hit and I was all in on the bands of the time… bastille, alt j, the 1975 (before they really blew up, #hipster), glass animals, lorde, walk the moon, chvrches, x ambassadors, the naked and the famous, halsey, grouplove, milky chance… like, if it was on tumblr, I was listening to it, hahaha.

Then in college I got really into alternative music, like chelsea wolfe and susanne sundfør and son lux and ms mr.

In adulthood I find that all this musical influence has meant that I like all kinds of music. I like trashy pop country. I like heavy rock. I like top 50 pop. I like rap. I like hyperpop. I like 80s synth pop. I like indie folk. I like it all, man. I have been in a pretty heavy rock era for the last, like… four, five years, though, so I think I probably primarily register as a rock listener, and if we were to get even more granular, I really love guitar-forward rock.

2. I’m a HUGE user of playlists. Spotify is the only streaming service I pay for, and I’ll pay for it for many many years, I imagine, haha.

I have over 100 playlists on there and really enjoy curating them as a little art form for myself. I rarely listen to albums, which I kind of think is too bad, because I DO think the album ~as a cohesive piece of art~ is kind of becoming a lost art in the age of streaming, and I’m not helping the cause at all.

But, on the flip side, playlist curation is a really enjoyable form of curatorial art, imo, and I deeply love and appreciate it. I love making playlists for anything and everything. One of my favorite playlist I’ve ever made is actually a reylo playlist, lol. I also made a killer Batman playlist after seeing rpattz’s batman, and I have some good old check please playlists as well. Fun fun stuff.

3. This is HARD but okay, I can do this…

Alt/indie rock: “Change For You” by Friday Pilots Club

Pop punk: “Why Do I?” By Set It Off

Electronic: “Fake” by Mystery Skulls (BUT A VERY VERY VERY CLOSE SECOND IS “DANCEFLOOR” by NOISY and Charlotte Plank)

Folk: “Leaf Off/The Cave” by José González

Rock: “Thrown Away” by VAST

Since three of those are rock/rockish offshoots (I am who I am, sorry), I’ll give you a few more divergent others:

rap would be “Boss Bitch” by Doja Cat OR “Von den fernen Bergen” by Ali As

house would be “Derezzed” by Daft Punk

disco would be “You Win Again” by The Bee Gees [my dad loves disco lol so… so do I]

country would be any and all Orville Peck [though normally my country tastes veer WAY WAY WAY trashy country pop lol sorry but it’s catchy]

and my pop pick is obviously Most Perfect Pop Song Of All Time, “Lonely Dancers” by Conan Gray

4. The genre I listen the least to is R&B, probably. I wasn’t raised listening to it and I’ve never really gained a taste for it, even though other genres I wasn’t raised listening to (country and rap, for example) DID grow on me. That being said, I really enjoy THEY., who is technically categorized as R&B.

Like I said earlier, I was really raised on rock music and I think that foundationally I am just a Rock Music Kinda Gal. I love guitars so much, man. But a close second is probably pop. Just as I was created to love guitars, so too was I created to love synths.

5. What makes an album “fascinating”? 🤔 I think this is hard, because first and foremost I am not an album listener, but also I don’t think I examine my music through a critical lens of fascination. I usually operate on a pure “how-much-straight-up-dopamine-is-being-poured-into-my-system?” scale when it comes to music, haha. Like, I’m not even primarily a listener of lyrics. I pay attention to the music first.

That being said…

Album 01 is going to be “Strange Trails” by Lord Huron. To be very, very annoying: I was into Lord Huron since their first album, and when they blew up due to a song from "Strange Trails" getting included in the TV show 13 Reasons Why, I was very annoyed because I think their sonic output shifted, and for the worse.

Anyways, I maintain that their first two albums are as close to perfect as albums get, and “Strange Trails” is what I find to be their strongest narrative album. There’s a whole storyline through the album that follows a fictional character Ben, the frontman, created. There was a comic book to accompany the album too, and I think the storyline is very lovely and I love some tragic love and magic wrapped into my music:) My favorite song off of “Strange Trails” is “Fool for Love.”

Album 02 is going to be “Bad Blood” by Bastille, which I also find to be Bastille’s finest work. Dan Smith wrote all these songs by himself in his den and—I really believe—perfectly embodied and channeled the sound of the 2010s indie moment. The entire album is so strong, and not only is it so strong that it doesn’t have any skips… even the EXTENDED version, “All This Bad Blood,” has no skips. Whatever Dan was fermenting in the lead up to “Bad Blood”’s release, it was pure gold. Nothing else quite captures the feeling of it being 2012 as much as this album. My favorite song off off “Bad Blood” is “Icarus” <3

Album 03 is going to be “Dream Machine” by Des Rocs. Des is on a one-man cocaine-fueled mission from God to bring back hard glam rock and I sincerely could not support his mission more. He constantly churns out bangers (his EPs “Martyr Parade” and “Let the Vultures In” are also worth checking out) but I found his songwriting to be simply ~exceptional~ on “Dream Machine.” I think he’s wonderful at writing evocative, classic-rock inspired lyrics that read as poetry to me:) From “Natural Born Thriller”:

Roll, thunder, roll / Riding like a freight train down on the tip of your tongue

Rattle in your bones / Shockwave ripping through the sky, in and out of your lungs

Love, lock and load / Fire in your eyes and you’re ready when the fever gonna come

Way down the road / Big wheels turning to the rhythm of the blood-red sun

Half a man and half apocalypse / The chase, the thrill, that you cannot resist

Day and night, every time / That one there is a natural-born thriller

Like MAN... that’s poetry in action to me. That’s just good writing. I also find the lyrics and storytelling of “In the Night” fantastic, and “Dream Machine” is such a perfect tone-setting, atmosphere-building track for that album to open on. It’s just one of the best constructed albums I’ve heard, full of bangers. My favorite song off it is probably “Natural Born Thriller.”

Damn that took me like two hours to get through, mostly because I got to experience the joy of scrolling through all my music and painfully selecting a few. This was delightful. Thank you, anon!

[lixxen]

can you tell us more about Grayer and their relationship with JD?

Of course!! I love talking about my boys :)

I'm gonna do this in bullet points so I can easily edit it as I go lol. These details pertain to both my Feral Branch AU, mentions of my my troll reproduction PowerPoint world building, and it's just his character in general :)

My playlist for them

Rest of the post is UTC to save everyone from chunky TL

To start off, some background about Grayer: he is alt rock/pop rock. His father is a rock troll and his mother is a pop troll who is one of many to escape the troll tree about ten years before the beginning of Trolls 1 (I can do a whole thing on them). The two fell in love, got married, and ran off to the Never Glade Trail to have Grayer. His dad carried him, so he's more like his dad (Granite and Flora are their names)

Grayer is the same age as Bruce, so a few years younger than JD. He grew up on the trail and takes care of the family's garden (which is basically a mini farm). He and his parents are big survivalists, so he knows how to survive pretty much on his own with just a backpack on his back full of a few items. He's rather quiet with patience, but with a quick ignition to fight at things he's passionate about; being raised by a very passive rock troll who is peace and love then pretty much the most metal head pop troll you'll ever meet. His mom's a spitfire with the heat of a thousand suns. But she's very sweet <3

Back then, he actually dressed in alt style; wearing a ton of baggy ripped black cargo pants, t-shirts of rock groups his dad gave him, some crop tops with fistnet tops underneath, the whole works. Eyeliner. Black stuffed bracelets and a choker. Troll's version of Docs (but the older, better quality ones y'know?). Now days, he's just plain Jane because he's older and doesn't have as much energy to keep up with it

Within John Dory's first few years, he struggled a lot. He traveled through Trolltopia and met a ton of people. They weren't the kindest, but understood the situation with Pop. So they would help and send him on his way towards Never Glade.

When he finally got there, he basically fell face first down. He lost half of his equipment and got horribly lost. He was optimistic and trying to act brave about being lost with not as many supplies. He realized he was way in over his head; he was some boy band dude who had a dream without much training. Dude is doomed by the narrative

Grayer, while out, found John Dory. He saw JD's fire in the distance and went to investigate it. He saw JD, who was different than the other trolls who would stop by his family's home. Normally he saw various Rock, Country, or random sub genre trolls come through either for the underground cross genre clubs or for hiking.

He actually watched JD for a bit. He was nervous to approach him at first. But after watching JD fail miserably to do a ton of very basic survival things, he decided to step in. He faked them running into each other and was like "you don't look too good! Let me help you :)"

JD automatically accepted it. This dude was doing BAD. The dude was debating on finding his way back to the Troll Tree. It was that bad. He'd rather be eaten by a Bergen than die out there where nobody would know what happened to him.

He also was amazed by some random troll about his age living out here.

So Grayer taught JD how to survive out there. JD learned how to properly get drinking water, patch wounds, make basic things, garden and gather food. The works! Literally he gave him survival classes-

JD was welcomed into the home by the parents. Grayer's mom was shocked to see another pop troll and she let him stay. She couldn't let the poor kid die out there or go back. She knew what that meant

Grayer and JD slowly grew close; bonding over music. JD would perform BroZone songs for him, to which Grayer would watch with the biggest dopey grin on his face

During this time, Grayer got into a nasty fight with one of the spider things. His hair got caught and he had to cut it off. He spends nights crying about his hair, but then styles it down. That's why it's short and looks like that. He keeps it short due to him living like that for so long.

Eventually, Grayer started to bring JD to the underground clubs that existed on the Trail. They were ran by outcasts and trolls who basically got ran out of their respected kingdoms for different reasons. Some where rebellious trolls looking for fun; or they just liked the scene. The two became prominent on the scene as "the love birds". Everyone knew them and some recognized JD from BroZone

Grayer's parents actually helped establish these clubs and underground community. They make clubs out of old hollow dead trees and then undergrown tunnel systems. They helped make the first few, since Grayer's dad was in construction. He doesn't run any of them. He just did the manual labor and helped perform multiple times. Grayer's family is just respected in the scene. There's about five families they're in kahoots with (I can expand on this if anyone wants).

Plus, they help trolls in need on the trail so people tend to know about the random trolls who help save people from death in the wild

Eventually, they ran into Floyd. Floyd was running with the alt/emo/grunge trolls. Some metalheads also. He was also running with a young Riff, who was only two years younger than Floyd. Floyd also has an underground career by now and has a mini indie grunge rock band suprisingly. (Riff's parents run one of the clubs and Riff lives with his grandad and little sister in the Rock Kingdom. Riff is Floyd's drummer and companion. They met in a grunge club in the Rock Kingdom. Floyd was gray for a while and passed as Rock). Floyd is excited to see his brother and he bonds with Grayer automatically

Floyd and Grayer have a heart to heart; talking about how Grayer is in love with JD. Floyd said that if Spruce and Grandma was there, they'd give their blessing. But since they're not and he is, he gave him his blessing.

Floyd 🤝 Grayer: being in love with their companion (past Riff/Floyd moment. They're just besties now y'know??)

JD and Grayer party a LOT during these years

Queue up JD punching some jerk for trying to come onto Grayer and then getting into a brawl outside of a club with the dude. Riff pulls strings to get them not banned from every club on the trail. Part of it is Grayer's parents being staples for making a safe underground scene on the Trail, but Grayer gives Riff the credit.

Around the eight year mark, Grayer finds baby Rhonda. She was abandoned by her mom so Grayer took her in. He gave her to JD as a birthday gift! That's how they know Rhonda so well. She's basically their baby :)

Grayer, at the ten year mark, confesses his love to JD. JD looks flabbergasted before saying he wanted to ask Grayer that. He was waiting for the right moment to ask Grayer if they could commit to one another. They were practically dating

So, they get married :)

JD braids Grayer's hair into the back of his hair, just in case one day he goes back to BroZone; so from the front you can't see it but the back you can. Grayer braids JD's hair more visibly in the front and wears it with pride.

The two are a grumpy old couple. They're very sarcastic but loving to each other, especially after marriage.

Did I mention that earlier? The two are a sarcastic and sassy power couple. They don't take shit and behind the scenes are very loving.

As the years go on, they don't have any eggs surprisingly. Everyone is shocked, but the two are perfectly fine with it. It happens sometimes; not every troll produces the viable eggs.

Grayer's parents die by the fifteen year mark, and they leave everything to Grayer and JD. They are pretty much set for life. So they're pretty much domestic besides when JD wants to go on adventures.

Speaking of which; JD goes on adventures sometimes, which leaves Grayer alone for a few weeks at most. The two are fine with it as long as JD tells Grayer about it. Normally it'll be in the form of the little bat dudes, like Queen Barb's bat Debbie. They have a flock of them that live around them. They feed them, so three or four will follow John Dory sometimes when he goes on adventures. They will basically bring communication back and forth

So, to the Trolls 3 plot

Riff comes back after World Tour to tell them about Branch!! He's alive and saved everyone!! Plus the pop trolls are free :)

JD sends a letter out to Floyd, who doesn't respond. He gets worried and decides to go try the Troll Tree, thinking that's where Floyd went. He tells Grayer he'll be back in a week and Grayer kisses him bye

That week turns into a month.

Grayer is worried sick and he can tell a ton of things are happening (because of the marriage stuff. If you don't read the PowerPoint then ignore this detail). JD doesn't respond to any of his messages, as they never get to him

Like, he's convinced JD is either dying or something bad has happened. He's hoping that JD isn't abandoning him.

He goes from being worried sick to being pissed because what the fuck his husband up and left and is clearly okay and alive!!! HE CAN TELL! JD CAN FEEL HIS DISTRESS!!

Grayer gets pissed, especially when Riff comes back to tell him about BroZone. He was happy for JD, but SEND YOUR HUSBAND A LETTER TO TELL HIM YOURE ALIVE!!!

So what does he do?

He throws JD's clothing out of the window in a fit of rage. Like. The dude is PISSED. He is what, in his 30's and his husband disappeared and could have been dead! He's having a moment. Let him be angry for the first time towards his husband

JD comes home during this.

JD stares in horror at the sight of his clothing being tossed out the window and he starts to scramble to grab them and get into the pod

Grayer sobs his little heart out to JD, who holds him and apologizes. JD explains everything. Grayer feels kinda dumb but vocalizes his feelings. The two come to an understanding

And eventually, he would meet BroZone and they'd enjoy him :)

[tactidoll]

Dollypop, got any rap recs?

so ive been planning on doing a series of playlists as a kinda introduction to rap, especially so after the dot vs drake beef has put rap back in the spotlight and made more people than ever actually aware of the lyrical content of these songs, its mostly been an issue of executive function beating my ass 5 ways to sunday lately, but suffice to say rap recommendations has been on my mind a lot lately

i could probably go on for a few hrs about hip hop and its place as the culmination of all music prior, but rap is a genre that more so than others rewards album listening so i will more often than not recommend albums over singles/tracks but ill try my best to isolate what i consider to be a well rounded list (no links cus i dont use spotify lmao)

theres a lotta ways to split up rap and hip hop as a whole into a thousand micro genres, especially when you take regions into consideration but i think im gonna go with just 15 tracks that cover as many bases as i can and give a little explanation for each track starting with

NY State of Mind - Nas: ny state of mind is THE classic in my books, dj premier provides the perfect boom bap beat for nas to make the final push to usher in a new generation of rap, literally sampling eric b and rakim in the chorus, the previous pair to bring the genre from the 80’s into the 90’s, furthering that push with more complex rhyme schemes and blending the street/gangsta rap of nwa and wu-tang with the jazzy introspection and philosophy of de la and tribe, a perfect set piece for the album of a desperate kid rapping and telling his stories like its his last day on earth because it just might be

Doomsday – MF DOOM: the manifesto of a super villain, a rulebook on rap, a re-emergence of a forgotten rapper, after the death of his brother and issues with the record label dropping KMD Zev Love X disappeared in ‘94 and then in ‘99 MF DOOM dropped operation: doomsday, the dizzying rhyme schemes and word play, the casual humor and pop culture and sampling referencing lends to a true statement of a song, that DOOM was here and was gonna change the world

4th Chamber – GZA: a dozen wu-tang tracks could’ve appeared on this list and all would be justified but 4th chamber is my favourite by far, starting with the now iconic samurai or kung fu film sample and then kicking into a crazy intro beat that calms slightly in time for ghostface killah to come in and pick it right back up with the first verse of this slick posse cut

Mathematics – Mos Def: Yasiin Bey Is a genius plain and simple, another track produced by preemo another masterpiece of a beat, Bey raps about the sociological statistics that work to keep the black population down in this mathematically driven guide through the politics of the late 90’s

You Got Me – The Roots: this track really shows just how good live instrumentation can be, black thought is one of the greatest of all time, simple as frankly I don’t have too much more to say its just a brilliant song

Wesley’s Theory – Kendrick Lamar: the opening to the greatest album of all time, opening with the mission statement of the album, the sample at the start before the james brown esque hit me pulls the tone back down to earth, part one of the track being a young kdots reactions to the money hes been looking for and part two kendrick plays the role of uncle sam the mascot of white supremacy looking to exploit over eager black artists and talents and lump them with a bill and lock them up when they cant pay it, the deep seeped politics, the groove of thundercat and george clinton of the parliments and funkadelic collectives and the dr dre break really helps sets the tone of the album

Jazz (We’ve Got) – A Tribe called Quest: the perfect jazz rap song, the beat was original made by pete rock before being remade by q-tip, a quintessential classic of the genre simple as

Shook Ones pt 2 – Mobb Deep: the greatest gangsta rap song of all time and frankly its not close its something spectacular, the hardest two 19 year olds ever sounded, over a dark almost evil beat produced by havoc this track is an absolute landmark for not just queensbridge but the entirety of the east coast

Introvert – Little Simz: this track is nothing short of spectacular, a powerful, cinematic, orchestral masterpiece, deep diving into her inner turmoil and her roots, the corruption of the british government, this song shook me to my core when I first listened to simbi, a rallying cry that calls for a war against the oppressing forces further tightening the chains if we ever are to be freed from the oppression

Don’t Cry – J Dilla: this song is gorgeous, chopping up I cant stand (to see you cry) by the escorts into a wonderful beat, made by jay dee in the final throws of his life, half worked on while hospital bound, frequent collaborator and fellow soulquarian questlove stated that this was a message to his mother as J dilla knew the end was near

Nuthin’ But A G Thang – Dr Dre ft Snoop Dogg: the quintessential G-funk banger the genre doesn’t get better than this

SORRY NOT SORRY – Tyler, The Creator: a weird choice for this list, I wasnt sure if I wanted to include it because its so tied to tylers discography but its honestly one of the best rap songs ever when you have the context, especially when you take into account the music video where tyler and all the various versions of himself stand before an audience of ex’s and other notable judgemental presences in his life, as he kills almost every version of himself barring the ‘ugliest’ sides of himself in igor and goblin era tyler potentially insinuating those parts of him still reside inside him

I Used to Love H.E.R – Common: this song is so very important, maybe the best use of metaphor in the whole genre, a fallen out of love story for that very same genre, fantastic storytelling and a great beat by no I.D. one of the most important producers and figures in hip hop out of chicago

Aquemini – Outkast: the title track from one the duos third album and really the record that put the dirty south on the radar on a nationwide level, a sign of their decision to stick together for as long as possible, andres verses really shows hes one of the all time greats and that big boi is not far behind at all

Hazard Duty Pay – JPEGMAFIA: this song was all I listened to for a few weeks after it release, an aggressive single verse track over a soulful beat what more could you want

[chameleonspell]

HTDC commentary - 0: intro

Recently, I made some unwise threats to write commentary on my almost-10-year-old Morrowind fic, and enough people encouraged me that I started going through my old notes, and re-reading the fic, something I hadn't done in more than five years. It's an interesting experience, looking at it with more emotional distance. I know I had none, at the time, riding a chaotic wave of complicated feelings and ideas that my brain had, for whatever reason, decided to force through the medium of Morrowind fanfiction, like trifle through a straw.

Why did I start doing that, again? 

"A combination of worsening social anxiety, rereading Pratchett novels, listening to the Magnetic Fields, and then starting a new Morrowind game" - Origins of the fic, according to me in May 2015.

It is true that by 2015, my social anxiety was becoming increasingly unmanageable. I used to wake up seized with immediate terror, if I knew I had to leave the house, that day. When I did leave it, the feeling of moving through the world under the eyes of strangers was enough to send me into deep dissociation, barely feeling like my surroundings were real, forgetting words, reduced to speechlessly stumbling around like an automaton.

Or like a video game character. I started a new game of Morrowind that spring. I'd already played it for thousands of hours, but I wanted to try a pure mage, and had a few mods to make it a bit more viable. An illusion mage, maybe, like a thief build, but using magic.

I'd been thinking a lot about invisibility, you see. Well... fantasising about it, but I'd done that since I was tiny. Thinking about it as an adult, surely there would be drawbacks, if you lived in a world where that was actually possible? Or, like... psychological complications?

On March 12th, 2015, Terry Pratchett died. Despite not having touched a book of his since my teens, it hit me like a tonne of bricks. I cried for a week, feeling like I'd lost my dad, talking with other grieving fans about how his books had shaped us, growing up, realising just how true that was.

I started re-reading the Discworld series again, immersing myself in that slightly arch but very warm and human narrative style. It felt so familiar, so natural, so easy to start narrating my Morrowind game like that.

And I already had a voice in my head, for a character, emerging from all the Magnetic Fields albums I'd been listening to. Intelligent, queer, bitter, disillusioned, depressive, detatched, self-aware - but not in any way that seems to, y'know, help. The Stephin Merritt Protagonist, basically. I'll probably mention more specific song inspirations from the big HTDC playlist as we go, but for now, Iriel's opening theme: Smoke and Mirrors. Anti-love songs for jilted illusion mages.

The culmination of all this was, that instead of seeking professional advice about my mental problems, I gave them to a fictional elf, instead. Thereby delaying me addressing my brain problems by several years, but bringing me several (I hope) lifelong friends, and, well. This fucking thing. No regrets!

I posted the first HTDC chapter on 5 April 2015 and the next dozen chapters very quickly thereafter, so I must have had quite a few already written before I decided to shove them all onto a hastily-created tumblr account.

I found a title just as quickly: How to Disappear Completely. Named less for the Radiohead song of the same name (though it does describe the experience of dissociation and has a line about walking through walls!), and more from my dim memory of reading a Radiohead interview, where Thom Yorke mentioned the book he'd stolen the song title from: How to Disappear Completely and Never Be Found, which has always stuck in my head, as a phrase. It fitted with my dim concept of the fic: what if invisibility, but too much? Later, I realised it fitted with the Dwemer as well, and felt extremely smug.

A song reference for a title is such a fanfic cliché, not to mention the lowercase one-word chapter titles. I was fine with all that. I was always committed to HTDC as a very self-indulgent project, thus the new pseudonym, separate from the rest of my online life, never mind my offline one. No audience, no embarrassment, no holding back.

A comfort project, no need to make much effort, just something silly and easy and fun.

lol.

lmao.

It started that way, I swear.

It devoured nearly 3 years of my life, ended up 40 times longer than my university dissertation, and, honestly, was 40 times the work, too.

It's far from perfect, but it's as good as I could make it at the time. It was a ride and a half to write, I learned a lot, and pushed myself to write in ways that were new to me. Over the years since, I've had people say it's meant a lot to them. Thank you, it means a lot to me, too.

next: 1: numb

[mariyekos]

I'm finally in the home stretch of my DMC1 fic (as in, the core idea of this fic, where everything was leading up to) and suddenly my inspiration has gone kaput. Maybe it's because I have ups and downs when it comes to my ability to write description, and the past several thousand words have been description heavy, exhaustion my description ability before I got to the place it's most important. I sort of want to just move along with the plot, but at this point I have the rest pretty thoroughly outlined so it kind of feels pointless to skip it? Idk. Maybe it's just that I'm not in the right mindset now. Need to get more into the vibe.

Along those lines, I really need to make actual writing playlists one day. I tend to just open like 10 different YouTube tabs and swap through them, but I don't even have those songs saved so now it's just my memory trying to get back to them and right now I don't feel like tracking down and hopping between the songs I used the last time I wrote this fic. The atmosphere and vibes have changed. Time to do something different.

I'm 65k words in at this point so I'm pretty deep. This isn't going to be as long as the Time Travel fic because it has way fewer plot events, but I do go into description more often across the fic since that's something I wanted to work on with this fic. I absolutely adore fics with a ton of description, so I wanted to try it with this one. It might be a little bogged down with it though, as both a writer and a reader, so I'll probably end up adding some and cutting some in revisions once I finish but before I post.

[sarah-dipitous]

Hellsite Nostalgia Tour 2023 Day 148

The Reichenbach Fall

“The Reichenbach Fall”

Plot Description: Moriarty hatches a mad scheme to turn the whole city against Sherlock.

Oh, Jawnnnnnnnn. Glad you went back to therapy over it though

Ok yes. He’s been ungrateful with his other tokens of gratitude, but to humiliate the man by making him wear the deer stalker cap after he’s just brought you interpol’s most wanted? Come on…

It’s an EAR hat, Jawn

The “confirmed bachelor” lines were no accident and just blatant queer baiting.

Jimmmmm!! Jim my love

I…made this scene a VERY large part of my personality for TOO LONG. Now I’m just gonna sit back and enjoy watching this man bring a country to its knees (this part of The Thieving Magpie was my alarm for years, and I maintain that I was correct to have it. It’s way better than what I have now)

Who’s doing it like him, I ask you

Wiggling, squirming. Oh man. I had THIS on playlists too (the song right before Jim’s trial…when I say my WHOLE PERSONALITY…stayin alive was also my ringtone. Would you believe I’m divulging this lore SOBER?? Because I am)

Do not be yourself in this trial, Sherls, omg…

There’s a weird nostalgic pang of “god I wish that was me” when he asks the one courtroom worker (truly, I don’t know her job title) to slip her hand into his pocket. Maybe it’s just the Irish accent. It’s just for gum but he’s so slutty about it

I can’t look at this actress without thinking of her as Jen from the IT Crowd. She can’t be anything else in my mind. She’s forever Jen doing a bit in a costume in different places (this is going to take forever to watch if i keep pausing like this)

The Sheriarty is jumping out right now. You don’t describe someone you know is definitely listening and watching you as “a spider, a spider at the center of a web. A criminal web with a thousand threads, and he knows precisely how each and every single one of them dances.” YOU ARE LOOKING INTO HIS EYES AT HIS TRIAL AS YOU SAY THAT ABOUT HIM. Were I a consulting criminal, I would be so flattered by that description

Oh god…don’t make the jury hate you. Yeah. Of course he finds it impossible to not show off

This tea scene omgggg when he…is it really breaking into 221b if Sherlock is expecting him??

Every once in a while, I do get the glimpses of how these three shows got lumped together. Jim telling Sherlock he’s boring because he’s on the side of the angels is definitely one of those things

He’s got the best little speeches “no such thing as a private bank account now, they’re all mine. No such thing as secrecy, I OWN secrecy. Nuclear codes? I could blow up nato in alphabetical order. In a world of locked rooms, the man with the key is king, and honey, you should seeee meeee in a crown” (did I do an embarrassing amount of that from memory? maybe so)

Oh shit…i forgot the fairy tale stuff Moriarty puts them through…I mean, you gotta fill 90 minutes somehow (I want to sleep so badly…but I’m not even half way done)

I fucking hate how he treats Molly. She deserves better than him and this show. God…she thinks she doesn’t count…fuck. I hate it

Riiiight. He made it seem like the kidnapping was Sherlock’s doing so he could then solve it and he the hero. Just planting the seeds of doubt

Oh the Tale of Sir Boast-a-lot

When villains hijack the airwaves>>>>>> (my taste has not changed a bit in 10 years lmaooooo) I know in this case, he’s actually the cab driver, but he’ll do it later in the series. For now, we’ll just enjoy this nice little story Jim’s telling

You can’t outrun………oh, that was one of the assassins that moved onto baker street

It’s so weird that he’s doing exactly what Jim wants him to do…..

He’s unbelievably precious as Richard Brook. Insisting he’s a children’s storyteller, he’s on tv. It’s on dvd. You do almost forget that he’s a criminal mastermind for a second, except for that one moment when Kitty can’t see him and he has that look on his face as he glances at Sherlock

John and Mycroft have such a good dynamic. No matter if they’re on the same side, on opposing sides…it’s always a good scene when it’s just them

Uuuuggggghhhhhhhh, we’re starting with the roof of St Bart’s scene…will it be as good and heartbreaking as I remember?

Reader, it is. Jim’s lament about how easy it was to beat Sherlock, his best distraction for the monotony of staying alive. Oh, bby. Andrew Scott is such a good actor.

The fact that there was no code, that it was always a few of those threads that Jim made dance to send the world crashing down around them.

(I’m currently living in a world where his character didn’t get absolutely fucked over by the last episode of the series…………….so far(?))

I do like that Jim underestimates the importance of Molly. She still deserves better from everyone around her, but it’s nice that she’ll get SOME recognition in season 3

Pausing because I know what comes next and I don’t want it to…

Can we not just stay like this??? (Not if I want to make it a true full rewatch…)

I STAY a “here’s how [villain] can still live/be alive” girlie. I DO NOT CHANGE LMAO

Oh the phone call… “nobody could be that clever” “you could” I hate everything

Mycroffffffffft. Jawwwwwwwwn.

John at Sherlock’s grave is just…heart wrenching. Always and forever.

This is the best and highest rated episode of this show for GOOD REASON

[oceanwithinsblog]

ok nobody asked for this but let me present you

✨my personal evaluation of each eurovision 2023 entry✨

where should i begin? i've decided to quickly comment this year's participating songs !! these are all personal opinions so don't take them too seriously ! hope you enjoy this sh!tpost of mine and, most importantly, happy eurovision grand finale day to all those who celebrate !! 💙💛

a quick legend: ❌ = song i don't like | ✅ = song i enjoy | ♾️ = song i have on loop (and is therefore among my faves)

as for the order of the songs, i'm using the eurovision 2023 playlist on spotify ^^

tell me more (turalturanx) ✅

this song is very simple and cute imo, still i'm not surprised it didn't make it to the final

aijā (sudden lights) ✅

this song is soooo good once you listen to it a couple times !! they were robbed, i really wished for them to qualify :((

we are one (wild youth) ❌

honestly? no. this doesn't quite do it for me. plus their staging was pretty awful during the 1st semi so yeah ... hopefully ireland will do better next year !

dance (our own party) (the busker) ✅

can i be totally honest ???? I DO NOT UDNERSTAND HOW IN THE EUROVISION THEY DIDN'T GET THROUGH THE FIRST SEMI I WAS AND STILL AM IN AWE WTH i have to admit the song didn't really catch my attention the first time i listened to it on spotify, but the performance they did on tuesday night left me speechless. so much fun ! so much color ! so much dinamicity ! plus those references to michael jackson the king of pop ! not my fave entry but they deserved to take part to the finale imo :(<3

burning daylight (mia nicolai, dion cooper) ✅

this song is actually pretty good to hear on earphones (on spotify), the chorus got stuck into my mind for days lol but after watching their performance i do agree with the televote - the live singing wasn't really nice. unrelated but the netherlands should try singing in their native language more often at eurovision !!!

like an animal (piqued jacks) ❌

i'm sorry fellow italian compatriots but i don't vibe with this song ... you tried and did your best on the thursday night tho !! kudos to you and good luck for your future ^^

d.g.t. (off and on) (theodor andrei) ❌

romania ... what happened to you ... don't tell me that hola mi bebebe was your peak at eurovision .... i don't wanna believe it .... but this whole song and performance really isn't it ... deeply unsettling for me

what they say (victor vernicos) ❌

greece ! i don't really know what to say about this, the guy has a nice voice but the song just doesn't work for me. i'm sad he didn't qualify 'cause he was very excited (and you could easily see it during his performance) but i think it didn't qualify for the best..

breaking my heart (riley) ✅

might come off as a surprise but i do enjoy listening to this song from time to time (on spotify) ! this boy is a personification of tiktok and that scares me ngl but i think the song itself is catchy. surely not suited for eurovision tho. the live version of breaking my heart loses all its catchiness but it's ok he tried

echo (iru) ✅

WHAT ! A ! VOICE ! iru's tone is so powerful and beautiful to listen to !! too bad i can't understand a word she is singing :// i was actually rooting for her to qualify on thursday but apparently european are deaf lol

power (diljá) ✅

i genuinely like the song and i think she has a great voice ! the performance at the second semi wasn't even close to one worth of qualification tho :( she was left alone on the stage and it felt pretty empty imo :( she's the cutest tho <3

mama šč! (let 3) ✅

OH MY LORD !!!!!! THIS IS MADNESS !!! THIS IS EUROVISION !!! HEAVILY POLITICAL LYRICS FIREWORKS COLORFUL CLOTHES THOUSANDS LIGHTS SCREAMING TRACTORS SILLY COSTUMES HIGH HEELS HEAVY MAKE-UP ROCKETS GO CROATIA FEED US

ps. i wrote that i enjoy the song - which i do - but i never listen to it on spotify honestly

blood & glitter (lord of the lost) ✅

germany has finally submitted a good entry !! love the alt rock vibes !! still no idea what the live performance looks like but i feel pretty good knowing these guys have a lot of fun on stage ^^

bridges (alika) ✅ ♾️

she's like a goddess ... vocals are super on point !! i'm kinda rooting for her, the staging is very nice, simple and neat. love the details !! go estonia !!

because of you (gustaph) ✅ ♾️

OMG PLEASE I'M LOVING THIS !! the live performance is even better than the studio version imo; the stage presence, the '90s vibes, the VOGUEING, the back up vocals, the dancer EVERYTHING IS SO ON POINT I LOVE IT I LOVE IT I LOVE IT totally my cup of tea <3 GO BELGIUM !!!

eaea (blanca paloma) ✅

it took me a few listens to really get the vibes and the lyrics, but i have to say i love this entry ! most importantly i love that spain is always doing spain ! vamos blanca ! love the union of traditional and modern elements into this, i hope it does well in the final ^^

break a broken heart (andrew lambrou) ❌

big no for me. any straight man singing about heartbreak is a big no for me. we don't care. ok, yk, you have a nice voice mr. lambrou, i'll give you that, but you shouldn't have gotten to the final imo. no hard feelings. plus wearing a tuxedo and singing on stage shoeless ??? ugh.

promise (voyager) ✅ ♾️

hell yeah !! aussies doing rock'n'roll and showing up on stage in a random car are also my thing !! they understood the assignment and i'm glad they did. can't wait to watch their performance again tonight !! kinda rooting for them ^^

ai coração (mimicat) ✅

again, kudos to portugal for always being portugal and bringing such gems to eurovision. i like this one. i don't listen to it often, but i for sure enjoy it when i do ! wishing her the best for tonight's finale !!

samo mi se spava (luke black) ✅

it took me a while to appreciate this song ngl ... luke gives an incredible performance on stage tbh, i'm happy he qualified for the final. plus singing in your native language and naming yourself after the dead serbian music panorama are big reasons to give you bonus points. slay king !!

due vite (marco mengoni) ✅ ♾️

i might be biased (i'm italian after all) but i love this song. i relate to this song. a lot. marco's voice is sublime imo, i'm so very glad he is representing our country in liverpool. <3 tbh i actually can't wait to see what he prepared for the finale !!!! i have really high expectations but i know he's gonna leave me awestruck <3 vai marchettooooo <3

stay (monika linkyte) ✅ ♾️

my lithuanian queen !!!!!!! love the song ! love the live vocals ! love the lyrics ! love the orange themed performance ! love the interactions with the back up singers ! totally 10/10 for me. sending her a big hug !

duje (albina and kelmendi familja) ❌

i don't know how to feel about this song. i personally don't get the hype. it's very albanian and very traditional and i appreciate it a lot, but i can't quite come to like the final product :(

watergun (remo forrer) ❌

sort of the same scenario 've already described for greece, he's got a nice voice but the song isn't right. plus it's a bit funny to hear a swiss guy saying he doesn't want to be a soldier ....

solo (blanka) ❌

poland is another big no, rigged. rigged. rigged. if anybody asks me, poland didn't participate to eurovision in 2023. shoutout to jann, i hope you're having a wonderful day <3

carpe diem (joker out) ❌

very much appreciating their outfit and vitality and sort of silly joyous queer vibes, but i personally can't come to like the song. still, i'm glad they made it to the final ^^

soarele si luna (pasha parfeni) ✅ ♾️

moldova has me clapping and singing and dancing and trying to learn how to play the flute. 10/10 chef's kiss. constantly on loop. great job pasha and friends, i'm partially rooting for you tonight !!

future lover (brunette) ✅

very interesting song, from the lyrics to the musical structure, from the outfit to the staging. brunette's voice is lovely. i wish she had sung the entire song in armenian, but still - it's good!

unicorn (noa kirel) ❌

a total ... skip for me ! shouldn't have qualified for the final ! and as i keep saying for years, israel shouldn't be allowed to participate to eurovision anymore ! good bye.

my sister's crown (vesna) ✅

the song is great, the message is nice (if i understood it correctly) but the whole pink outfits don't match any element of the performance. still, a nice entry for czechia !

[n-brio]

✨About Me✨

Thanks to @somethingusefulfromflorida for tagging me!

NICKNAME: I've had a few over the years but none of them are current. I've been Lefty, Stan, Tuna, and a secret fourth one I won't tell you all because it's derived from my actual name.

SIGN: I have had a semi-active contempt for astrology ever since I politely sat through an ex whinging about how his friends all secretly hate him and it isn't fair and he doesn't even know what he did wrong etc. etc. nonstop for an hour over Skype way back when. "Why don't you just ask them what's going on?" "I can't do that. Pisces don't talk about their feelings." Take some responsibility for your choices!!

HEIGHT: 5'4"… and a half!

LAST GOOGLE SEARCH: "i hope somebody got fired for that blunder"

SONG STUCK IN YOUR HEAD?: Dusty Dunes Desert, Earthbound

FOLLOWERS: 27, and it is indeed that many and not a bugged/inflated count. I try not to let the fame get to me 😌

LUCKY NUMBER: I also don't believe in lucky numbers.

SLEEP: I shoot for eight hours, but I can survive as long as it's more than seven. Any less and I get real stupid (well, stupider) real fast. I used to fast for days with no problem, but I need sleep and I don't fuck around with that.

DREAM JOB: Writer or voice actor for a Crash Bandicoot cartoon… I know in my heart I have neither the talent nor connections to make it happen, but I can dream! 🥲

WEARING: Black-and-white floral print yoga pants, novelty T-shirt from Mother Bear's pizzeria in Bloomington, Indiana, a city I've never been to. Notable for its mascot which made my high school teachers do double takes and gives Tawna a run for her money:

FAVORITE SONGS: Too many to count, so I'll name just one from each of my playlists: Sloop John B by the Beach Boys Synchronicity I by The Police December, 1963 (Oh, What a Night) by the Four Seasons Animal Impulses by IAMX Useewa (Shut Up) by syudou Ekoroshia (Kill Command) by Masafumi Takada Cliff Town by Stewart Copeland Dive Remix by Mewmore

(Nobody is obligated to listen to these, just if you're curious. I'm not assigning anyone homework hahaha)

FAVORITE INSTRUMENT: Uhh, vocals? I took a couple years of choir and was the "weakest link", but I had fun… (´ᴗ` )

AESTHETIC: I'm not a fan of the "aesthetic"/"[x]core" style of self-expression. I think it's better to keep an open mind and try to find something interesting/appealing in all styles, images, art etc. You may notice patterns in the things I like/share, but I'm not fussed about putting names to them.

FAVORITE AUTHOR: I don't usually search out books by a specific author. I've recently enjoyed books by Khaled Hosseini (The Kite Runner and A Thousand Splendid Suns), Gillian Flynn (Sharp Objects), Douglas Adams (The Long Dark Teatime of the Soul), and Tara Westover (Educated).

FAVORITE COLOR: Individual colors are less important than the color scheme they are a part of. Any color can be beautiful if it is paired with the right complement. That said, any scheme that stars jade or olive green, pastel pink, burgundy, dark brown, or black tends to win me over.

FAVORITE ANIMAL SOUNDS: Cat purrs. Frogs chirping on a summer night. Cicadas buzzing.

LAST SONG: The Night by Aurelio Voltaire. So I (like many others) learned about this song through the animated music video by Daria Cohen, but I just learned now that there's apparently an alternate version with an extra set of lyrics that the original lacks.

LAST SERIES: If you mean like TV, I don't really watch much nowadays. My sister and I are working through Earthbound and Psychonauts right now though (alternating between the two).

RANDOM: Anime Dr. Frankenstein lives in my room. I didn't draw him.

Tagging @frostconebite, @mikey-putrid, @lesserbilboy, @worpworp, @sleuth-hounds, @rhadinesthes and anyone else who wants to do it \o/

[applepi00]

Self Indulgent Explanations of Perfect Disaster’s Playlists

,,So I mentioned doing this list months ago but today I have enough nothing going on to actually do it! So, here’s the youtube version and here’s the spotify version, they’re mostly the same save for a few songs that are exclusive to the youtube version. I’ll do all the common songs in order as they are in the playlist and then do the odd ones out at the end!

1. Ever After by Marianas Trench, this song is the source for the title (I could be your perfect disaster, you could be my ever after) but generally the whole pre-chorus through to the second verse were what put this on the list!

2.  The Bones of You by Elbow, this was poached from another playlist, but was included for the hook (and I’m five years ago and three thousand miles away) as well as the bit about “I love the bones of you that I will never escape” and the bridge!! “I can’t move my arm for fear that you will wake” just hit the vibe exactly!

3. Clair by Have Mercy, also poached from the same playlist Bones of You, but was included for the lines “You’ll always be someone if anyone says you’re not” and the entire repeated chorus of needing love, of still having that hole in your chest, it felt so right for the situation in the fic.

4. I Don’t Like Who I was Then by The Wonder Years, again poached, but this song just fit so well with the ideas when I was starting the fic, in fact a bunch of Dazai’s dialogue lines are actually almost exactly lines from the song! Such as the bit’s about trying put his past self in the ground, or when about being eighteen and afraid and how that wasn’t an excuse, just ugh the chorus and bridge espcially are so good for this fic.

5. I Just Want to Sell Out My Funeral by The Wonder Years, in the playlists for the lines: “I’m scared shitless of failure and I’m staring out at where I wanna be” and “I just wanna be enough for everyone” and “I used to have such steady hands but now I can’t keep them from shaking” and “I was kinda hoping you’d stay/I need you to stay” and “Cuz I’m sick of seeing ghosts and I know how it’s all gonna end”

6. Move Along by The All-American Rejects, mostly here for the chorus, that “keep trying” vibe felt integral considering this is the “fix yourselves” fic compared to the rest of the series.

7. Pressure by Paramore, here for “tell me where our time went and if it was time well spent, just don’t let me fall asleep feeling empty again” and “cuz I fear I might break and I fear I can’t take it”

8. Emergency by Paramore, here for the vibes mostly, not even specific lines really but the chorus fits and the instrumental and vocal style fit the tone I had in mind

9. Say Anything by Marianas Trench, god this song fit so well with some of the self-punishing behaviours that both Chuuya and Dazai indulge in, so: “I could take it if you need to take this out on someone” and the chorus and  “hurts the same when nobody knows guess that’s just how it goes and I won’t say anything at all” and just ugh that whole self-hating vibe ended up influencing how Chuuya’s spiralling out now that there are no immediate crises to jump to.

10. Nobody Puts Baby in the Corner by Fall Out Boy, here for “and if you say this makes you happy then I’m not the only one lying” and “keep quiet nothing comes as easy as you, can I lay in your bed all day?” and “wear me like a locket around your throat, I’ll weigh you down I’ll watch you choke, you look so good in blue”

11. Easier by The Crane Wives, this was the vibe for Dazai through Masterpiece as well and it just kinda expanded to both of them, that whole “if I was someone else, if I weren’t myself would this be easier” thing digs so so well into the insecurities and neuroses in this fic

12. Masterpiece Theatre II by Marianas Trench, another carry over from this masterpiece will (tear you apart), here for “this broken beautiful mess that I've made” and “this is just a part I portray... can I hide in you and stay here?” and just that whole thing about finding comfort from your demons in another.

13. Apple Pie by Lizzy McAlpine, suggested to me by my good friend Bailey ages ago, the soft domestic feel fit right in particularly “I found you under an April sky, and you feel like city-life, apple pie baked just right, home is wherever you are tonight” and “I’ll be fine with that goodbye as long as I don’t have to say goodbye to you as well”

14. How Do I tell You? by Lizzy McAlpine, here for “I’m a little scared you’ll leave, even though you tell me you won’t” and “I’m a little scared to be someone you’re scared to love” and “I’m a little scared to speak, cuz I can’t find the words to say, I don’t want to make this about me I just can’t hold it in today” and “How do I tell you that I don’t know what it means to be happy with somebody, don’t know anything bout that” and “I  feel like I found my place”

15. Love Run (Intro) by The Amazing Devil, here for “run to show that love’s worth running to”

16. Little Miss Why So by The Amazing Devil, the vibe of trying to care for a depressed loved one that won’t take your help was heavily influential for the fic with Chuuya’s parts turning out the way they did, “it’s daylight again and you look like I’ve failed you” and “I don’t know how to reach you when you get like this, I’ve been waiting for you to come home” and “Stop making up death wishes and take my lifeline” and “If I’m good will you come back?” 

17. Wild Blue Yonder by The Amazing Devil, here for the chorus: “so hold me, lover, like you used to, so tight I’d bruise you” and “try please try for me”

18. Farewell Wanderlust by The Amazing Devil, the diaogue with the inner demons personified was interesting to me, but also: “I promise you I’ll be better, I promise you I’ll try, but like rubbing wine stains into rugs it’s my curse to try to make things right but by trying make them worse”

19. That Unwanted Animal by The Amazing Devil, here for “You try so loud to love me, I cannot seem to hear” and just generally most of Madeleine’s sharp passionate lines through the last few verses are just so good, so fitting vibe wise.

20. Dead on Arrival by Fall Out Boy, here for “this conversations been dead on arrival” and “a rivalry goes so deep between me and this loss of sleep over you.” Literally neither of these boys actually fucking sleep even half decently through this fucking fic, why did I do this to them?

21. The Patron Saint of Liars and Fakes by Fall Out Boy, here for “when it all goes to hell will you be able to tell me ‘sorry’ with a straight face?”

22. Our Lady of Sorrows by My Chemical Romance, holy fuck this song gave me so many little lines I bit into in my head, like “we could be perfect one last night and die like star-crossed lovers when we fight” and  “shed your yellow take my hand” and “stand up fucking tall don’t let them see your back and take my fucking hand and never be afraid again” and “I’ll make you understand and you can trade me for an apparition” and “just because my hand’s around your throat (doesn’t mean I don’t love you)”

23. Demolition Lovers by My Chemical Romance, god this song is the vibe for most of my iterations of SKK, just generally speaking, but it’s here for: “I’m trying, I’m trying to let you know how much you mean to me, and after all the things we put each other through” and “I feel like there’s nothing left to do but prove myself to you”

24. To The End by My Chemical Romance, here for “If you marry me, would you bury me? Would you carry me to the end?”

25. It’s Not a Fashion Statement It’s a Deathwish by My Chemical Romance, here for “the damage you’ve inflicted temporary wounds I’m coming back from the dead, I’ll take you home with me, I’m taking back the life you stole” and “just you and I, your starless eyes remain” and “I lost my fear of falling, I will be with you”

26. House of Wolves by My Chemical Romance, here for “well I know a thing about contrition, cuz I got enough to spare” and “tell  me I’m an agenl, take this to my grave, tell me I’m a bad man, kick me like a stray”

27. Bulletproof Heart by My Chemical Romance, absolutely one of my top picks for SKK songs, but it hits right from the first line: “gravity don’t mean too much to me, I’m who I’ve got to be” and “I got a bulletproof heart, you’ve got a hollow-point smile” (tell me that isn’t soukoku, it fits them so well!!) and “so get me out of my head, cuz it’s getting kinda cramped you know” just, the vibes in this song are perfect

28. The Only Hope For Me Is You by My Chemical Romance, again mostly the chorus: “can I be the only hope for you? Cuz you’re the only hope for me”

29. Summertime by My Chemical Romance, here for “when the lights go down will you take me with you?” and “if you stay, I could even wait all night, or until my heart explodes, how long until we find our way in the dark and out of harm? You can run away with me anytime you want” and “turn my headphones up real loud, don’t thinkI need them now, cuz you stop the noise”

30. All I Wanted by Paramore, here for “think of me when you’re out there,I’ll beg you nice from my knees” and “all I wanted was you” and “I could follow you to the beginning just to relive the start, maybe then we’d remember to slow down at all of our favourite parts”

31. Of All the Gin Joints in the World by Fall Out Boy, here for “sometimes I just want to know what it’s like to be you” and “I used to waste my time dreaming of being alive (now I waste it dreaming of you)” and “I’ve got headaches and bad luck but they couldn’t touch you”

32. 7 Minutes in Heaven (Atavan Halen) by Fall Out Boy, here for “I’ll be stuck fixated on one star when the world is crashing down” and “I’m not going home along, cuz I don’t do too well on my own” and “I’m having another episode, I just need a stronger dose”

33. I Slept With Someone In Fall Out Boy and All I Got Was This Stupid Song Written About Me by Fall Out Boy, here for “I found the cure to getting older, and you’re the only place that feels like home” and “some secrets weren’t meant to be told” and “douse yourself in cheap perfume it’s so fitting of the way you are, you can’t cover it up” and “find a safe place, brace yourself, bite your lip” and “brace yourself, they call kids like us vicious and carved out of stone, but for what we’ve become, we just feel more alone” and “Always weigh what I’ve got against what I left, so progress report: I am missing you to death”

34. My Heart by Paramore, here for “I’m finding out that maybe I was wrong, that I’ve fallen down and I can’t do this alone" and “stay with me, this is what I need please” and “I am nothing now and it’s been so long since I’ve heard a sound, the sound of my only hope” and “my heart it beats for only you/my heart is yours”

35. Early Sunsets over Monroeville by My Chemical Romance, another song I keep drawing from, in particular it a good chunk of the inspo for my skk week fic and for the vampire fic I’m muddling on! But it’s here for “running away and hiding with you, I never thought they’d get me here... I fought them all off just to hold you close and tight” and “and in saying you loved me, made things harder at best” but just the whole soft melancholic feel, and the refrain of ending things if necessary, it fits the fic well

36. Old Friends Like Lost Teeth by The Wonder Years, here for “we lost you last week but you walked into the room again” and “I know it’s a bad dream” and that whole chorus, and “a song about death in my head, and I can’t help but hum along”

37. Local Man Ruins Everything by The Wonder Years, here for “I’m trying to hold it together but irony’s found cracks in the foundation” and “I’m not a self-help book I’m just a fucked up kid” and “it’s not about forcing happiness, it’s about not letting sadness win”

38. There,There by The Wonder Years, here for “you’re just trying to read but I’m always standing in your light, you’re just trying to sleep but I’m always waking you up just to apologize” and “I’m lost in my head again”

39. Porcelain by Marianas Trench, here for “it’s alright if you don’t know what you need” and “I’m right here if you need someone to see, it’s speak or forever hold your peace, it’s alright to take time and find where you’ve been”

40. Careful by Paramore, here for “I settled down a twisted up frown disguised as a smile” and “hope for me was a place uncharted” and “the truth never set me free so I did it myself” and “open your eyes like I opened mine, it’s only the real world” and “shifting your weight to throw off the pain, you can ignore it but only for so long” and “it hurts remembering how it felt to shut down”

41. Cosmos (Outer Space) by t.A.T.U., here for “feel no more feel no less” and “stars we don’t wanna reach, scars we don’t wanna stitch” and just, home as space (zero gravity) is a consistent theme in my head for these two

42. Jackie and Wilson by Hozier, here for the fun vibes and “we’ll steal a Lexus be detectives driving ‘round picking up clues” and “no better version of me I could pretend to be tonight” and “with my mid-youth crisis all said and done, I need to be youthfully felt cuz god I’ve never felt young” and just the chorus guys, it tickles at me for this fic

43. Famous Last Words by My Chemical Romance, another song I keep going back to! It was actually the principle song that inspired When the Sun Goes Black! It’s in this list for “but where’s you heart? And I know there’s nothing I can say to change this part” and “a love that’s so demanding I can’t speak” and “I am not afraid to keep on living, I am not afraid to walk this  world alone, honey if you stay you’ll be forgiven, nothing you can say can stop me going home” and “these bright lights have always blinded me” and god the whole bridge has inspired so many fics and chapters for me, it’s so good

44. Clarity by Zedd ft. Foxes, a song I wasn’t expecting but it came on the radio and hit me like a sack of bricks. “Or clocks tick ‘till it breaks your glass and I drown in you again” and “you are the piece of me I wish I didn’t need” and “if our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy? If our love is insanity, why are you my clarity” and “refuse to make amends, it cuts deep through our ground and makes us forget all common sense

BONUS Youtube Only: 1/6 -out of gravity- by Vocaliod-P (translation by SirHamnet/Lily Chen), here for “someday I promise I’ll surely take you with me high up above the satellites and out of this gravity” and “when I finally found you I saw that your eyes were heavy, I asked you what was wrong but ‘I’m okay’ is what you told me” and ahhh most of this song really since it’s all about reducing gravity to make a loved one’s troubles feel lighter and that hits exactly right for this fic and this series and this iteration of my boys, please listen to it

[rianafying]

you know what the thing is? the thing is that i can feel that i am better, so much better, but not done. i’m not there, i haven’t healed, and i don’t know if there is a destination called healed or if it’s an eternal journey. but i feel terribly lonely and incapable today. but still completely full of hope and patience. because i have had the most wonderful time so far this year and i know that it’s just a matter of time before i feel better again. i just have to rest before my strength returns. it’s been a rough life but i’ve been kind and patient and resilient, and i’ve made it out mostly. i’m in the good times now. the worst is in the past. i could be as happy as anyone else. i could be in love, i’m fulfilling my dreams. i’ll fail and i’ll lose and i’ll get back up. i just need to wait this out. this terrible blip in my good life. it is making me want to overeat to drown out my misery but i’m trying to eat the normal amount. trying to eat well, and to take care of myself. i feel kind of unattractive lately. and i can’t find the energy to do my beautifying ritual. i actually haven’t taken a shower in two days, i don’t think this will turn into a depressive episode but honestly if it does i’ll manage. i’ve been through so much worse. this is my journal and i don’t have to worry about how i look or sound in here because i know my intentions are and have always been good. i just want the best for myself and everyone else. if hyping myself is what i need, that is what i will do. i’m ridiculously hot, i’m driven and im talented and im capable, and im creative, thoughtful, kind, resilient, and i deserve to be happy. i love myself. that’s the only love i really need, my own. and my inner child is upset this week and i will handle her with care. everything is going to be okay, i am safe, i healthy, im trying my best. that is the most anyone can do. i dont need anyone else to understand me. i’m going to be okay. my friends love me, my sister loves me, i am appreciated and missed and i love them. this is my place in the world. i deserve to stay alive and eat and sleep and study and to fail and learn from my mistakes. i’ll take care of my health again and as a bonus, im not starting from square one this time. my room is relatively clean. my finances are good. my fridge is stocked. my rent and bills are paid. it’s going to be okay.

and about not feeling like i’m good enough or capable enough, well nobody is born capable, people learn and i can learn and i can get better. it’s just a matter of learning more and practicing more, and it’s all so much easier when my mental health is better.

i’ve been eating through my telstra data like crazy. but what can a girl do you know. gotta use the internet. anyway, i’m trying to get up and do something. i don’t really want to bed rot. and as useless as it might seem to get dressed and go out, i should still do it, even if it doesn’t make me feel better. my heart is sad, i can physically feel it. can’t let a stranger make me this sad. ever. this is not who we are. we’re cool and fun and strong!!!!! everything will be okay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im literally happier than most people i know. and not in an ignorant and oblivious way. i’m happy in a reborn after a thousand painful deaths kind of way. i’ve made my peace with this world kind of way. i have found my place in the family of things kind of way. to love live even when i have no taste for it kind of way. not just despite the misery but because of it.

and besides i can use this sadness to my advantage. really listen to the sad playlists and let the songs hit.

[savventeen]

🎧 for the ask game please? i'd like some song recommendations because my playlist is like 80% kpop help-

but also!!! hihi savv i hope you're having a good day today ily ♡♡♡

OMG HI XANTHE!!!! 💙✨ i hope ur having a good day too!!!!

okay im gonna go ahead and give u a few bc ur the only one to send one in so far and i have So Many songs i want to write fic for sjdjdkkddk (narrowing it down to three was actually really hard lmao)

first up i'm gonna give you i will by mitski

so stay with me / hold my hand / there's no need / to be brave and all the quiet things you bear / seal them up with care / no one needs to know they're there / for i will hold them for you 'cause all i've ever wanted is here / all i ever wanted / all i want is / always you / it's always you and we're not out of the tunnel / i bet you, though, there's an end and while you sleep / i'll be scared / so by the time you wake / i'll be brave

this makes me want to write qpr reader x member emotional hurt/comfort. like, just them being vulnerable with each other and holding each other (both physically and emotionally) and reader knowing that while they worry for member, member worries just as much over them and. idk, being brave for the people you care about and having it not automatically equal romance :')

(also mitski's one of my all-time fav artists so if u like this song u should check out her entire discography, her songs make me Feel Things, in like, the experiencing the human condition kinda way)

[putting the rest under a readmore bc i apparently have a lot to say OOPS]

okay next i'm gonna give you sweet time by porter robinson [cw: death mention]

and i feel so stupid / 'cause i wasn't scared of this before / but since i met you / i don't wanna die no more so take a long time / 'cause, oh, the world is lucky to be your home, i know / i need a next life / 'cause i'm not satisfied to know you just once / so take a long time

this makes me want to write some kind of reincarnation/reality-hopping au So Bad. just like, the idea of meeting someone and wanting to know everything about them, and not just the them of now, but every them that could and would have been. idk what the plot would actually be, but [member of choice] needs to find you in all these different realities for Reasons and in getting to know all these yous, comes to love all these different parts of you. sometimes it's romantic, sometimes it's platonic, but it's always with the same dedication

but yeah. "i need a next life, 'cause i'm not satisfied to know you just once" ughhhh. love this so much

(also another favorite artist of mine, specifically his album 'nurture'. listen to that shit on repeat so often lol)

okay lastly im gonna give you it happened quiet by aurora [cw: blood mention]

feathers falling out of the pillow / as if time is standing still / i can’t remember much more / but i know it happened quiet / so quiet you fell apart / like a stone can be broken into sand / a thousand pieces / spread across a crying land / and you can’t remember that day / but you know it happened quiet / so quiet / words falling out through the window / all that remains is a silent call / is the earth colored red? / as i land like a flower on the meadow are your dreams as dead as they seem? / don’t you speak over my voice / i will return from the shadows / and i’ll bleed in your bed / turn it red / like the ground outside your window / love is wild

i would love love LOVE to write a dark fairytale/fantasy fic for this, like!!! god, the vibe of this song feels like those stories that start off soft and fairytale-esque but by the end you realize it's actually a dark kind of warning and not a happily-ever-after.

so the basic idea i have would be something along the lines of: reader was once like, a forest guardian or something, and at one point a human came along and was like "let me live in ur forest pls" and they were skeptical but eventually let them as long as they didn't hurt the forest at all. so the human builds themself a little cottage in the clearing and doesn't hurt the forest and so reader lets themself start to get to know the human and oops! they end up falling in love (bad idea) and in a moment of vulnerability, the human attacks them, nearly kills them, and curses them so they can't protect their forest anymore. bc lo and behold, little human is actually a greedy bastard from the nearby kingdom wanting to take all the resources here.

fast forward a bit, and [member of choice] who has some magical abilities, starts getting really weird dreams about the forest on the other side of the kingdom. cue member being enlisted to help reader enact their revenge plot to save their forest (and also maybe reach some righteous havoc while they're at it) and they become best 'villain' bros the end :')

(once again, love aurora so much, i highly recommend checking out her discography haha)

send me a “🎧” and i’ll give you a non-kpop song i want to someday use as fic inspiration

[nostalgia-of-music]

Musical Memories in Thousands of Songs

For this post, I was planning on giving you guys some examples of songs that give me some specific, nostalgic memories. I was trying to think of ways to find the right songs to use when I stumbled across the perfect solution: Spotify. Every song I have listened to in the last 5+ years is logged in a database on Spotify.

Every song I have listened to in the last 5+ years is stored in a Spotify database. If I really wanted to, there are ways for me to reach out to Spotify to acquire this database, which would consist of my listening history since the day I first got the app. However, this process would require far too much effort and, for my purposes, there really isn't a reason to do this either.

Spotify has a much more accessible feature that makes much more sense for my situation: Liked Songs. Every song that I've ever "liked" on Spotify is added to an (in my case) extremely long playlist that continues to grow every day. For me, this is a list of 2,383 songs. I enjoyed each of these songs enough for me to "like" them, solidifying their spot in my "Liked Songs".

So, I concluded, what better place to look for songs that evoke memory than a list of songs that I actually like. Rather than just scrolling through this list until something specific caught my eye, I decided to press shuffle and let it find random songs for me. For this post, I shuffled three songs. As it would turn out, I had a small memory for each of these songs.

The first song it gave me was "On My Soul" by Meek Mill. I have a memory from last year of me sitting in my friend's dorm playing Rocket League while listening to "Expensive Pain", the album this song is featured on.

The second song was "That Part" by ScHoolboy Q. For this song I have a memory of my walking to work, as a lifeguard, on an extremely hot summer day while this song played in my AirPods.

The third song that came up was "Something In The Way" by Nirvana. Out of the three, this one evokes the strongest memory. The memory is of going to see "The Batman", in which this song is featured, at the Strand Theatre on Mainstreet. I feel like I can taste the junior mints and rootbeer I enjoyed while watching this movie. I think of the rain outside that night, and how it reminded me of the rain in the film.

All three of these songs evoked very vivid memories for me. After these songs, I did continue going through the songs in my shuffle and found that some songs really didn't have the same effect. The ones that had no effect, however, are songs I really don't know all too well.

I'm curious to know how many other people have memories like this when hearing specific songs.