#once again this is an analysis of MY protayal of judas

[lcngdays]

judas was in love with jesus and i can prove it. analysis under the cut.

Now, if you've never seen JCSS, this may come across as confusing. As I have gone back and read the Gospels in the actual Bible, but hear me out. We don't see anything of Judas's side in the Gospels in the Bible. He is only reported on my people who hated him for betraying their cause. Jesus Christ Superstar is actually a fascinating tale, and I would attribute that to the fact that, in a lot of ways, it is Judas's Gospel. It explains why he did what he did, how he came to be who he was, and how his life ended in such a sour way. 

But what I'd like to mainly focus on is the queer undertones the story in JCSS has. First we must look at the song I Don't Know How to Love Him, which is sung by Mary Magdalene about Jesus. 

"I don't know how to love him/ What to do, how to move him."

She sings these as the opening lines to the song, but as the song ends, we see just how deep her devotion and love for Jesus is. 

"He scares me so, I want him so/ I love him so."

This clearly represents heteronormative love, between a man (Jesus) and a woman, (Mary Magdalene). So where does this idea that this musical actually represents queer ideals come up? While we can clearly see Judas being jealous of Mary in the song Strange Thing, Mystifying, when he sings, 

"It seems to me a strange thing, mystifying, that a man like you, can waste his time... On women of her kind." 

And while this can just be seen as his dislike for her formerly being a prostitute, when you actually watch the scene play out, in which Judas seems to take pleasure in the fact that everyone is mad at him it just screams jealous ex-boyfriend to me. 

Then, in Everything's Alright, we see Judas stalking and sulking around in the background while Mary anoints Jesus and helps calm him down. Judas is unable to let this go, because of his jealousy in regards to how Jesus favors Mary over him. He hides in a guise of wanting to save money for the poor, to which Jesus rebukes him, upsetting Judas further, as he assumed Jesus would have taken his side in such an argument. 

But perhaps the most damning evidence that this is a queer piece of media comes from the song Judas's Death, (tw for suicide in the latter half of this song) in which Judas reprises the song, I Don't Know How to Love Him (remember, this is Mary's love confession to Jesus!).

Does he love... Does he love me too?/ Does he care for me? 

This is what Judas sings. And when coming to the reality that Jesus may not love him, at least not in the way Judas loves him, and that he, in his selfishness, has caused Jesus untold pain... Judas chooses to end his life. Additionally, he turns his anger towards God, accusing God of using him for his plot to force Jesus into martyrdom. He doesn't forgive God, and he doesn't forgive himself.