#on the one hand: ''do I honor death by letting him rest'' yeah my rook is pro that

[cityandking]

literally sitting here at the emmlich choice trying to make a decision

[opalmaplehibiscus]

Jamil’s Guide to Get the Okay From Your S/O’s Parents HC

HC on how Jamil Dealt w/ Everyone when trying to get Permission to Date Reader

*Continue ver. Of Jamil and His Adventure with Romance HC

·       So, you would think that since the 1st year crew witnessed the confession, you and Jamil would be dating right? Haha, wrong

·       Deuce and Epel would be giving Jamil death glares every time he says hi to you when meeting each other in the hallways, giving light kisses on the cheek or forehead, or even approaching you in general

·       The two would pick a fight with Jamil, making delinquent-like facial expressions and cracking their knuckles going as far as to even growl when Jamil doesn’t stop walking up towards you

·       They felt like dads that were about to give up their kid to some evil maniac, tainting their once innocent child to a “I hate you Dad” delinquent – and they weren’t having that. Excuse you, I raised that kid and you’re about to ruin all my hardwork? F*** you, like hell I’m letting you do that

·       Jamil would get annoyed by it. But, he would hold back his sneer since he knew that you treasure your friends, and he literally just started dating you (although Deuce and Epel would like to say otherwise). Yeah, no, he’s not willing to get dumped when their relationship hasn’t even lasted a day

·       He would let his tongue use its magic, not his unique magic, but its flattering magic in hopes to convince Deuce and Epel to let him at least get a foot closer to you

·       And to the horrors of Dad #1 and #2, they nearly fell for it. Nearly. That is until Ace comes in to save the day

·       Ace would make it seem like he approved of you and Jamil at first. At first

·       Out of all 5 of them though, he was  #2 most overprotective dad 

·       He’s seen your ups and your downs. And he was freaking saved by you not once, but twice. Not only that, but you tolerate his jerky-side and continued to support him nonstop. He cares about you and wants you to be in good hands, not get hurt

·       After witnessing Jamil’s true side and how much of a jerk he was to Kalim, yeah, Jamil was added to Ace’s black list. Now that he’s dating you though? He’s on the hit list now

·       And to emphasize that Jamil would never get his approval, Ace would take you somewhere else whenever Jamil ends up arguing with Deuce and Epel

·       Jamil would notice it right away, and try to get through or at least stop it, but Deuce and Epel, following the plan the 1st year squad created, would continue to block his way, even going as far as to insult how ugly he looked when he was OB. Which was taboo.

·       The duo would then be facing a pissed Jamil, who gets angrier when he sees Ace sticking his tongue or giving a knowing-smirk behind his shoulder as he takes you far, far away from him

·       And every. time. it. happens. Jamil would be tempted to use his unique magic. The only reasons he wouldn’t were because of 1. You, 2. He just got over OBing and wasn’t dumb enough to use it when he wasn’t done recovering, and 3. You

·       If Ace was bad, Jamil had it worse with Sebek

·       Surprisingly, the half-demon/half-human was #1 most overprotective dad

·       When Sebek watched how Jamil betray Kalim, he felt betrayed and angered

·       He thought him and Jamil were similar, with the want of wanting to protect their master while feeling honored to stay by their sides

·       After watching the magicam, he was already ready to take down Jamil. But boy oh boy did he had the guts to date you

·       Sebek: PREPARE TO DIE SNAKE Jamil: WHAT THE ACTUALLY F- Kalim: NO CURSING JAMIL! Well, at least not in front of your s/o Jamil: … F-Duck

·       Sebek wouldn’t hold back and literally tries to kill Jamil while Jamil runs away, screaming profanities left and right. Sebek wouldn’t admit it even in his death, but he holds you close to his heart

·       Jack, being the nicest of the five, would interview Jamil, interrogating him to T. He’s also the one that gives the okay sign to attack Jamil once he sees that the coast is clear

·       When Jamil talks with Jack, it goes more or less smoothly except for some bumps along the way

·       Jack: You better watch your back, if you ever hurt [Y/N]… Jamil: Do you expect me to actually take you seriously? I bet I can beat you even when you’re using your unique magic Jack: Even in front of [Y/N]? Jamil: You’re becoming more like your dorm leader Jack: You do realize that I’m the easiest one to get permission right? Jamil: Did I ever mention that your unique magic makes you look majestic. Honestly, I admire it

·       In the end Jamil does get Jack’s permission to date you. And thanks to that, he was able to get Deuce and Epel’s permission more or less. If you take out the threats and insults and him nearly getting caught by you when he was about to roast them

·       Just when he finally, and miraculously, finished getting all the first years’ permission, someone taps him on the shoulder. When he turns around and sees the rest of the dorms, his face turns pale

·       Are you kidding him? Why the actual crap are they involved? Just let him date you for gosh sake!

·       Out of all the dorms he had the easiest time to get approval, it was Heartslabyul

·       Riddle was similar to Jack, where he interrogated Jamil, probing around to see what were his true intentions of dating you

·       After the whole, intense event, Jamil was able to prove that he wanted to date you out of love and adoration he held for you. To be completely fair, he had no choice but to give honest answers since Riddle had used his unique magic on him, while Cater was filming him with his phone and Trey, who he thought would be the softest one of the three, was giving him a glare that could potentially put the devil to shame

·       The talk with Octavinelle was just a shaming session. They would continue saying “shame on you for so and so” or “you really think you could date [Y/N], when you’re only going to do this and this”, listing everything he had done in chapter 4. When they mentioned you not liking guys that would scream “DOKAN! NICE SHOT!”, he wanted to just dig a hole

·       Pomefiore though made Octavinelle seem like a baby. Until then, Jamil thought he had the sharpest tongue in the school. But that obviously wasn’t the case

·       He found it strange that Vil had politely asked him to stop by his dorm so they could talk, and thought that if he used his flattery again, he’ll at least easily get approval

·       The blows Jamil faced was too much though. Vil and Rook, when they want to roast someone – they don’t hold back

·       Jamil’s pride was completely trampled to the point he wasn’t able to get up. From judging his taste in fashion to criticizing how he looked when he Obed - and what do you mean he looked like Juju?! He looks nothing like that dumb snake! His looks, at the least, is decent compared to the rest of the school! WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE’S JUJU?!?!?!?

·       Vil: Honestly you just remind me of that one snake that always sticks its tongue out on the side of its tongue from that one voodoo movie Jamil: What? I’m not that dumb snake! Vil: You’re right. That’s just an insult to the poor thing. You look like Jafar

·       We don’t talk about Savanaclaw. Don’t mention it to him, don’t try to ask about it to him, don’t bring it up to him

·       Jamil: Why the hell do I need to get approval from you? Leona: Is that how you’re going to talk to their parents when you ask for their permission to date [Y/N]? Jamil: At least they’ll like me unless a pathetic cat who’s only liked by a kid Leona: … “I am hunger. I am thirst. I am which steals your tomorrow –”

·       Honestly, Jamil didn’t know why you didn’t mention that you were friends with Malleus Draconia? That guy isn’t your “cute, kind and shy Tsunataro”!!!! He’s THE Malleus Draconia!!!!!

·       Jamil has felt fear before. He’s familiar with it. He felt it when Kalim was about to die from poisoning, when Kalim fell his magic carpet, when he found an assassin disguised as a servant, waiting to kill Kalim in his sleep. But the fear he had for the Diasomnia dorm tops all that.

·       He never would’ve thought that out Silver, Malleus, and Lilia, he would be most scared of Lilia

·       What baby face? What about him talking like a grandpa? All Jamil sees is Satan in a body of a dark fae 

·       When he was able to finally leave their dorm, he nearly fainted from the sheer pressure they emitted. They do not hold back on their blood lust. Whoever gets on their bad side, his condolences. You aren’t going to survive

·       When you greet him from the dorm’s entrance, he demands you to spoil him for a week while resting his head on your shoulder and hugging you tightly

·       When you hug him back just as tight, and patted his head while saying he did good, it reminds him why he still did it and that everything was worth it. Your mere presence was enough for him, yet when you comfort him? It was the best thing ever

·       After resting and spending a whole day with you (it ended up becoming more of a therapy session for his newly formed PTSD from Diasomnia), he prepares himself to face the final boss: Kalim

·       Despite Kalim already telling him that he supported their relationship, Jamil knew better than to just leave things at that

·       Jamil was aware how precious you were to Kalim especially when he heard Kalim saying you were his bffl right after Jamil

·       When he heard how you helped Kalim become more honest with his feelings and spent time hanging out with him when he was lonely, the feeling of guilt crashed into Jamil

·       It was times like this that he’s reminded how much of a jerk he was towards Kalim and that he should do a better job giving Kalim the respect he deserves

·       So, when he approached Kalim and asked Kalim’s approval, the conversation between Kalim and Jamil ended up being another heart-to-heart conversation with Jamil wanting to actually gain approval as someone Kalim would honestly support, not because he was his best friend

·       In the beginning, their talk resembled that of a person consulting a relationship counselor when Jamil was talking about his honest opinion of him dating you, his feelings for you and how he honestly felt nervous around you. Despite his calm and chill demeanor, Jamil talked about how he was scared of hurting you. Even if it wasn’t his intention, he was scared that he might screw up

·       Kalim, being someone who knew him the best, would point out everything good about Jamil, and Jamil would forever hold it a secret in his heart, but when Kalim mention how Jamil was someone he would trust despite everything that happened

·       The conversation shifts  towards them telling each other how much the other changed and developed after the whole Chapter 4 incident

·       When Kalim brought up how he learned to be more observant and considerate towards him, Jamil felt his heart beat faster from the nervousness and guilt. Jamil wanted to tell him that Kalim did more than enough, that he was, other than you, the only person in the world who would ever give him honest praises. That Kalim would forever be his irreplaceable friend

·       Yet, Jamil could only hold back seeing how this was going to a rare moment that Kalim actually opens up and spills everything that was piling inside of him. And if he interrupted, he knew that Kalim would end up stop talking about it, and how was he going to know that Kalim is actually okay with him dating you when it hasn’t even been a few days since the two of them went back becoming buddies?

·       When Kalim starts talking about how closely he holds Jamil and you to his heart, and that he wants to see the two of you becoming happy, Jamil would deny the fact that he was tearing up. Nope you’re just seeing things, Kalim, I’m not about to cry. I said I’m fine, Kalim no seriously I’m okay Kalim-

·       When he sees you coming out of your hiding spot from Kalim’s room, he surprised

·       You confess to Jamil that you came to also gain Kalim’s approval just a few hours before he had arrived, but stayed back out of your concern for him

·       When you noticed how Jamil started to look offended and thought you were suspicious of him using his unique magic on Kalim like he did before, you clarified and mentioned how Jamil looked nervous, heck more nervous then the time he had to talk to Diasomnia which led you to stay back and morally support him

·       Jamil would try to hide his blush, embarrassed and touched that you stayed back for him

·       He pulls up his hood, press it down firmly on to his head, pulls the strings until his face wasn’t visible, and he lied there in ball position

·       It took you and Kalim a good hour to coax Jamil to get him off the ground, and another hour to get him to take off his hood

[gayoperatorgunclub]

ULTIMATE SHIP MEME: MontaDoc Edition? Pretty please? Or any MontaDoc content. I crave it. Much 💕

of course!!!!!!! sorry this has taken so long, but i sincerely hope you enjoy it!!! 💝💝💝

General:

Rate the Ship -   Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs

How long will they last? - for fucking EVER!!!!!! 

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - two words: mutual. pining. this period, often referred to as the “Beginning of Operation: T.E.A.M. D.A.D.S. (Temporary Employment As Masters of Dad And Dad Sweethearts)” however, unbeknownst to anybody else in rainbow, by the time Operation: T.E.A.M. D.A.D.S. had begun, gustave and gilles had already been together for a couple of years. how did they actually get together? about six months after the GIGN joined rainbow, gustave was in the middle of a mountain of paperwork when he heard someone clear their throat. he spun around to scold whoever it was for coming to medbay when they were sick (despite the fact that he was coming down with a nasty cold), only to be greeted with gilles leaning nonchalantly against the doorframe. “gustave. you look as though you’re about to meet death for dinner. how can you expect to take care of others when you’re not taking care of yourself?” gustave just sighed and shook his head, muttering something about leaving him be for another couple hours so he could finish his paperwork, but gilles has other ideas. in mere moments, gustave goes from standing over his desk, organizing some files, to being held in gilles’ big strong arms. “wh- gilles! i-” he was cut off by his own yawn, and gilles smiled at him fondly. gustave felt himself blush, and he squirmed a little, but let gilles carry him to the GIGN quarters. as soon as it seemed like gilles was going to leave, gustave pulled him down for a kiss, then pushed their foreheads together and whispered “you’re going to carry me all this way and not even stay to make sure i don’t go back to my office?” gilles just grinned at him, climbing into bed beside him and wrapping his arms around him. 

How was their first kiss? - ROMANTIQUE! and smelling of sickness but what can you do

Wedding:

Who proposed? - monty!! he decided to cook a romantic candlelit dinner at their apartment, and when he sees gustave come home from work, all ragged and exhausted, yet still with a glimmer of determination and subtle joy, he says the first thing that comes to mind: “will you marry me?” gustave froze, his cheeks still rosy and his hair sprinkled with snowflakes. “will i what?” gilles realized his mistake and flushed, stammering a response before gustave was standing in front of him, staring at him scrutinizingly. “gilles.” he started, reaching to intertwine their hands, bring them between their chests, “what did you say?” gilles gulped, then steeled himself and got down on one knee. “gustave kateb. love of my life, light of my days. the man i want to wake up next to every day for the rest of my life. the man who i adore with every fiber of my being. would you do me the honor of being my husband?” 

Who is the best man/men? - for monty: bandit! for doc: lion (everyone but them thought it was a joke until the day of the wedding). dominic and olivier’s dual best man speech is the stuff of legends. there were tears, there was laughter, and there was an almost excessive amount of thinly-veiled sexual innuendos at various people in attendance (including both grooms; the best men were both drunk of their asses) 

Who is the bride’s maid(s)? - they actually fight over who gets to pick twitch! meanwhile rook is in the background like D: (don’t worry, it’s decided that he and twitch will be ring bearer and flower girl respectively) for monty: dokkaebi. for doc: finka 

Who did the most planning? - they both did! though gustave focused on food and flowers, and gilles focused on the guest list and the venue (but they ran things by each other before any final decisions were made)

Who stressed the most? - gilles! he was so worried about their families not getting along that he actually prepared a “leave my husband and his family alone or so help me i will never speak to you again” speech

How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - gilles’ racist, homophobic, french nationalist uncle (no one in the family likes him, so it wasn’t a big loss) (this uncle also made a surprise appearance at the family dinner where gilles introduced gustave to the rest of his family, and started yelling about “godamn immigrants” and other such bigotted statements, before gilles’ sister physically dragged him out of the house and threw him out the door. afterwards, up in the guest bedroom, gilles quietly tells gustave that it’s okay if he wants to leave, or break up, or anything, and gustave just laughs and tells him that if he wasn’t prepared for family members to express their distaste, he wouldn’t be dating a white man. he pressed a kiss to gilles’ temple, before whispering “although, he was right about my being an immigrant; it’s just that i was born in Paris and immigrated with my family to algeria, not the other way around. A for effort, though”)

Sex:

Who is on top? - gilles!!!! although gustave will occassionally ride him 👀👀👀

Who is the one to instigate things? - gustave is lowkey horny 24/7, but if gilles walks in on him bending over to get something from a cabinet, or tilting his head all the way back while drinking from his water bottle, thereby showcasing the way his throat moves as he swallows, he will lose his shit 

How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now

How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head

How long do they normally last? - okay i’m gonna change this one to an explanation of some things from below. i personally think doc lowkey a freak, and gilles is happy to oblige him if that’s what his lapin wants (although he’s not entirely sure how he feels about this “overstimulation” and “post-orgasm torture” and “cock & ball torture” stuff. specifically, he’s not sure he likes hurting gustave, but, while he probably won’t admit it out loud, he secretly adores making gustave cry. when he’s so helpless and powerless and mindless, and he’s begging for something, but for what he doesn’t really know. maybe it’s the knowledge that gilles is in complete control, that gustave trusts him to do this, to make him hurt and cry and just melt, the knowlege that gustave is completely reliant on him for his pleasure, his pain, and everything in between. it’s a heady thing, and gilles isn’t sure how he feels about it, but he’s pretty sure the warmth in his chest and the warmth in his gut are good signs 

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - unless they’re doing some of the things mentioned above, or mayhaps some denial 👀👀👀 then yeah, everyone gets the same. they’re very considerate when they’re just doing vanilla 

How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.

Children: btw, the rest of this is kinda set in a post-retirement au (idrk i just want them to have a farm and be peaceful). give it whatever context u want tho, i was just havin fun

How many children will they have? - they will have four cats and a dog, as well as 2 horses, a donkey, 5 cows, an alpaca, a rabbit, some ducks, a flock of sheep and goats, and the occasional visit from a herd of deer from the forest surrounding their little farm

How many children will they adopt? - since humans CANNOT, i repeat, CANNOT, give birth to the animals listed above, they’re all adopted

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - no one. the animals potty train themselves

Who is the stricter parent? - gilles sneaks them treats while gustave lectures them about dietary habits, so take your pick 

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - whenever gilles leaves to run errands, one of the goats goes into a depression so deep and miserable that they’re utterly inconsolable until he comes back. once they hear the sound of the car in the driveway, this lil goat, lovingly named “Bastard” by gustave, will climb onto the roof of the house and scream his joy over gilles’ return to the heavens 

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - they tag team on things like feeding the animals and cleaning out the barn, but gustave is much more organized about it

Who is the more loved parent? - the cats, dog, one of the horses, donkey, alpaca, rabbit, goats (except for Bastard), and deer all prefer gustave, though gilles is adequate in the event that gustave is busy with something else (although the alpaca and donkey hate his guts, and will escape their pastures to break into the house and be near gustave. gilles maintains that they’re both devil-spawn, but gustave says he’s just being dramatic and that Thamin (alpaca) and Albalatin (donkey) are complete angels who could do no wrong)

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? - animals have NOT unionized. yet. 

Who cried the most at graduation? - idk if this counts, but when Bastard finally figured out how to get himself down from the roof after getting himself onto it, gilles cried for an hour

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - gilles lowkey does whenever thamin and albalatin escape to go out into the world and commit crimes, but only to make sure his husband doesn’t get upset when he finds out his precious creatures are hell beasts. certainly not out of anything resembling tolerance or *shudder* like 

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - gustave, but gilles can make a mean bowl of cereal

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - gustave. gilles will eat something straight from the garden and gustave is like “DID YOU CHECK IF IT WAS RIPE?????? YOU COULD DIE FROM THAT YOU KNOW, THEN WHERE WOULD I BE???” 

Who does the grocery shopping? - gustave. gilles is something of a hermit in their town, and people often remark about the “sweet, kind doctor and his utter brick wall of a husband” 

How often do they bake desserts? - whenever Bastard goes a day without doing something Bastardous 

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - both lowkey prefer salad, since they care for many animals that would often get used for their meat, and they can’t bear to think about hurting any of their babies

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - gilles. the people in town helped him when he burst into the little grocery store all panicked like “I NEED TO MAKE MY HUSBAND A SURPRISE DINNER BUT I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO MAKE” 

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - gustave. gilles like being at home, but city-boy over here thinks that restaurants are a weekly luxury

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - neither. it was thamin and albalatin, attempting to frame gilles for yet another felony

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - gustave. everything is color coded. sex toys included 

Who is really against chores? - gilles. gustave films him whenever he actually does clean and yells things like “go white boy go!!” and sends them to twitch for her T.E.A.M. D.A.D.S. scrapbook 

Who cleans up after the pets? - they both do, but gilles gets stuck with shit duty more often than not

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - gilles, once. gustave walked in, sniffed the air, then glared at him until he actually swept whatever it was up and threw it away 

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - gustave “we can’t have guests over, the house is a mess” kateb

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - Bastard. he then proceeded to eat it

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - gustave and his hour-long skincare routine 

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - gustave, bc sadiqi the dog (not to be confused with sadiqi the kitten), or Big Sadiqi (kitten sadiqi is Little Sadiqi) is his, gilles, and he will not allow his precious boy to be influenced by such creatures as Bastard 

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - they get little sweaters for the animals. that is all

What are their goals for the relationship? - joke: gustave always says “the White Man’s money” despite the fact that his family is richer than gilles’. woke: mutual happiness, comfort, and healing 

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - gustave. after 11 am, thamin and albalatin decide they’ve had enough and break in to lay down on the bed next to him. gilles banishes himself to the couch for a week

Who plays the most pranks? - Bastard, thamin, and albalatin. although gustave did dye the sheep’s wool (while it was still attached to them) different colors and patterns and, for the ones who were perfectly content to sit still and be held, replicas of famous paintings (his favorite artist is monet, in case you forgot that he’s french)