#okay imma go do something right quick... so just send a message if u want it

[nickmuch]

c.z.k. - high school (Part 2)

PART 1 / PART 3

Note: I was asked to turn this into a longer story, so here’s part 2! I don’t know in what direction to necessary go with this and how to end/wrap it up, so if you have any ideas message me pls! I’ll try to make this a 5-part-imagine.

Also: Edwin crackhead hours have arrived. Again

“So, you’re cool with that?!” Edwin shouted in disbelief.

Nearly four months had passed since my little moment with Zion and a lot had happened during this time. After the party, everything seemed to go smoothly between us. Probably way too smoothly. We spent most of our free-time together, doing god knows what. However, at the end we decided we would be better off as just friends. He reasoned that it was unfair to the boys and only made the whole group dynamic odd. I was okay with that. Okay, scratch that, I wasn’t okay with that. But I wasn’t going to throw a fit or anything and honestly it ended up working out better than I would have thought.

“Sure, why shouldn’t I?” I asked. This only made me earn a scoff from him. “Are you okay? Do you have a fever or something? Did you catch a cold?” Edwin pressed the back of his hand against my forehead, trying to see if I was indeed getting sick. “Stop that” Nick mumbled, swatting his hand away from me. “Bro, she’s okay with that, though!”. The neighboring table turned around giving us glares for being so loud. “Excuse my little idiotic friend over there” Austin apologized in behalf of Ed. He was just about to protest when he got interrupted by Brandon. “She’s okay with what …?”.

He had spent half of the lunch-time in the art room, trying to compose a beat he couldn’t get out of his head and for which he might have earned himself detention from our English teacher for “making too much noise during class”.

“She’s okay with Z and Asya hanging out” ��Hanging out? Since when is that a problem? They are friends I thought?”. Edwin slapped him across the back of his head. “Are y’all dumb or are y’all stupid?! They are dating or something, Ion even know. But I for sure saw ‘em swap spit earlier this morning and thinking about it now: B, you can have my lunch. I lost my appetite.” He shoved his tray in Brandon’s direction, who didn’t even notice judging from his perplex expression towards me. “So, you’re trying to tell me that Z is with Asya – the girl who he said was like a cousin –“ “Correction, he said little sister” Nick chimed in. The boy with glasses shook his head. “Alright, who he said was like a little sister. And you’re cool with that? Even though that’s low key incest-y If I might add. Besides, do I have to remind you that not even a month ago he broke things off out of nowhere with the shittiest of the shittiest excuses? You cried for the whole weekend!”.

He was right. I had cried about it for three days straight. I really didn’t mean to, but somehow, I guess I liked him more than I wanted to admit. The first night the boys had made it their mission to cheer me up, but once they realized it wasn’t working, they just joined me and my pity party with some Ben & Jerry’s. At some point, Edwin even shed a tear or two. “I just don’t know if I should be sad that my favorite ship just sank or if I should beat his lanky ass for breaking my twin’s heart!” he exclaimed.

“I know, but I’m over it now” I poked in my salad. “And frankly, he is too by the looks of it”. I really didn’t mean to look over to her table. It just happened for a split second. Of course, it was right in the moment he was leaning in, giving her a kiss on the lips. She was blushing like mad. “This is so disgusting. Here, you can have my lunch” Brandon slid the tray - that originally was Edwin’s - into Austin’s direction. “I just don’t get it, man. Zion really liked you. Why did he pull that move on you?” Nick asked. No one could answer him. All of our gazes were pointed in their direction. After what felt like years, I decided that enough was enough and got up. “Yo, where you goin’? We still need to talk about this” Edwin stopped me to pull me down again. Though, I ended up sitting on his lap instead of my original spot, he seemed to not care. He was determined to get the truth out of me. If there was one thing you needed to know about Edwin, it was that he cared about his family dearly. Whenever one of his siblings was sad, he automatically was sad, too. Ever since I moved in, that same rule applied to me.

“You want the truth?” I said annoyed. All I wanted was to get out of here, in all honesty. The feeling of humiliation was getting stronger by the second. He just nodded cautiously, as if he didn’t know whether or not to answer me. “I feel like shit” I said, feeling a little bit relieved to finally speak my mind. “He’s annoying me. Just last month he was all into me and suddenly he’s with her?! Plus, what type of shitty excuse is that?” my voice was starting to tremble at this point.“It’s unfair to the boys and makes the whole group dynamic odd” I mocked him. “I am really starting to think that I was just pass-time to him and that makes me mad. It’s really unfair, okay?! If you like someone else, why in the flying fuck would you even get involved with me? Ugh, fuck this shit. I don’t even wanna be his friend anymore. Seeing his face makes me wanna beat his ass and I ain’t about that life. My momma raised me better than beating the ass of a bean stick!”.

Once I was finished with my rant, I finally dared to look at the boys. All of them had shock written all over their faces. “Aye, Ma” Nick spoke first. “You should’ve told us earlier. We would’ve checked him and at least made sure he wouldn’t be all lovey-dovey with her in your presence”. All I did was sigh.

“I don’t know what to say. Or feel” Austin looked so helpless. He was struggling to find the right comforting words and suddenly I felt horrible for dragging them into my stupid problems. “It’s alright. You don’t have to say anything. I will get over it at some point. It’s not like he’s the only cute boy in New York”. “That’s right, I’m cuter” Edwin tried to lighten the mood and it actually worked. We were all laughing before the bell rang, signaling that class was starting soon.

After school, Edwin immediately drove us both home, so I could take a nap before the boys came over. As soon as I was in my bed, I of course was struggling to fall asleep. “Can you come over? I can’t sleep” I spoke into the phone. Not even ten seconds later, Edwin barged into my room, getting under the covers with me. The fact we got so close over the last few months was making me happy, to say the least. It wasn’t weird to share a bed with each other, we were siblings after all. “We shared a womb, we might as well be able to share a bed” he had said jokingly one day. The silence was comforting me in a way I couldn’t explain in words.

“Fuck Z”. Him suddenly speaking shook me out of my thoughts. “I mean, don’t fuck him. But fuck him. You know?”. Sometimes, it was hard for Edwin to find the right words. It wasn’t because he didn’t know what to say, but rather the fact he had so many things to say that it just ended up blocking his mind ultimately. “I know”.

“This is some sweet home alabama shit” “Shut up, Austin. They just fell asleep together, no big deal” “Okay guys, but I’m getting hungry. Should we wake ‘em up now?”. His body started to shift beneath me, both of us fully waking up by the noise the others were making. “Good morning, honey bubbas!” all three of them were towering over us. The sight was rather scary, with their creepy grins plastered on their faces. “What time is it?” Edwin asked sleepily. He seemed a bit disoriented. “Time for you to get up and make us some food! Mama Honoret went out with the niñitos, so we’re all by ourselves”.

Slowly, we got out of bed to go find something to eat in the kitchen. Ding Dong. The doorbell rang. “Do you guys expect someone?” I asked confused. None of them were able to meet my eyes, looking slightly uncomfortable and at a loss for words. Instead of waiting for a reply, I went straight to the door to open it. “Wait!” “Hold up!” “Don’t” “No!”. Too late. There he stood, three boxes of pizza in his hands. “Uhm, hey”. My first instinct was to slam the door shut in his face and cuss the others out for not telling me sooner. However, on second thought, I decided against it. “Hi. Come in, I guess”. Awkwardly, he greeted his friends and made his way towards the kitchen to put the food on the counter. “So, uhm how about we watch some Netflix while we eat? On My Block sounds good?” Edwin tried to distract from the obvious thick tension in the air. I wasn’t going to ruin what should’ve been a chill night with my favorite people (minus Caleb) and just said “Sure, sounds good”.

The whole night was spent with Zion staring me down from his seat and Edwin exaggeratedly laughing at the funny moments to avoid the awkward atmosphere. Brandon was busy shoving his face with pizza – probably so that he didn’t have to speak. Nick and Austin were arguing about the gang situation in Freeridge. “If he wants his little brother to live a better life, then why is he dragging him into it? Isn’t he the gang leader or something? Just let your brother go to school and boom, problem solved” “It’s not that easy, bro! You want Oscar to lose his street credibility? Might as well put his clown suit on already”.

When I shifted to find a better position, his eyes were still on me. So, I decided to send him a quick text in hopes of making him stop.

< Dude, stop staring. Ur making me mad >

< I’m not staring, u must be trippin shawty >

< first of all, you’ve been staring since season 1 chapter 2. We’re on season 2 now. Second of all, if you call me shawty one more time imma rip ur ass open >

He visibly gulped at my last sentence, contemplating what to reply but ultimately deciding against it and sliding his phone back into his back pocket. Quietly, he stood up exclaiming to the group that he had to leave. A loud sigh of relief left Brandon’s lips, as if he had been waiting for this moment the whole night. “Thank god” he mumbled lowly, yet everyone could hear him clearly but decided to ignore it. “I’ll see you guys on Monday”. With that, he immediately left.

“I think I’ll call it a night. Haven’t really slept well recently”. It was true, I could barely fall asleep nowadays. Tired or not, the night wasn’t my best friend anymore. Everything was keeping me up. The drama with Caleb, the new life I yet had to adjust to – the boys made it easier, though -, and the passing of my parents. It was all too much at once. How was I supposed to comprehend all of this in just a matter of three months? Exactly, there was no waysomeone could deal with that in such a short period of time. The first couple of weeks I was as good as could be expected under the circumstances, but now it all seemed to slowly catch up on me.

“What! No! This was supposed to be a chill night, followed by the best sleepover of all time!”Edwin stood up, trying to make me stay by hugging my body tightly. “Yeah, you can’t leave! Not when Edwin is acting like a crackhead again” Brandon said, his arms securely wrapped around my shoulders. “Aight, I guess it’s group hug hours”. Soon, I found myself squished between not only Ed and B, but also Nick and later even Austin. “Okay, you guys won. I’ll stay”. They cheered at their victory, all pulling away at once. “But” This made everyone look at me suspiciously. “We’re gonna do a beauty-night!” I exclaimed happily with the biggest smile on my face. “Oh hell nah, I’m out!” Edwin crossed his arms, slightly turning away with his nose all scrunched up and brows furrowed. To be honest, he looked like a baby right now. “… unless this means I’m allowed to use that weird blue face mask from Lush?” he asked full of hope. “Yeah, why not”.

In a matter of minutes, we were all piled up on my bed, discussing what face mask would be the best for whom. “Your skin’s whack! Go put that charcoal one on, do something nice for your pores for once” Ed threw the bottle with the black liquid at Nick who grumpily obliged and started to apply it all over his face. “This feels nice. What exactly is that?” Brandon was looking curiously at the big tube in his hands, examining it in hopes of understanding what he just put on his skin. “It’s clay” I told him. “Clay” he repeated quietly and slowly, to no one in particular. Shaking my head with a content smile on my lips, I turned to Austin to see how he was holding up. We decided to let him try a bubble mask but looking at it now we might have made the wrong decision. Every inch of his face was covered in bubbles, and when I say every inch, I mean Every. Inch. Of. His. Precious. Face. “My eyes are burning, is this normal?”. “… Yes” I lied. Grabbing a wet cloth, I softly started rubbing the mask off of him before he ended up blind.

“Okay, what’s next? Do we paint each other’s nails? Do we play pillow fight? Do we talk about our menstrual cycle?”.

“What the fuck, Edwin?!”.

“Hey! Nothing wrong with talking about periods. It’s a natural thing and frankly, it’s actually good to talk about it with your friends to see, if – “

“Of course it’s a normal thing to talk about, but I think you might’ve forgotten something”.

Edwin looked at Brandon quizzingly. “We don’t have a uterus”.

“… Oh”.

Sometimes, he was just too much, but that’s why we loved him. “I think it’s time for bed, boys”. Reluctantly, they got up and lied on their designated air mattresses. “But Edwin can sleep in your bed? That’s so rude, Ma”. “Shut up, shark boy. I’m her twin, that’s just how we roll” he laughed evilly before turning the lights off and saying our good nights to each other.

“If it bothers you so much, why don’t you just tell him?” B looked at the direction my eyes were trained on. Zion would whisper something into Asya’s ear, making her giggle, then he would whisper something else, making her giggle again and so on. I was getting aggravated. “Can’t. That’s super awkward. I wish he’d just use one of his last functioning three brain cells to consider my feelings and not do all that while we share the same class”. Cleaning his glasses with his cotton shirt, he took his time to say something. “Tell him just that”. Turning around, I rolled my eyes at him. “Caleb, stooop!” she giggled for what felt like the millionth time. Before I knew what was happening, I was right in front of Zion dragging him out of the class and into the empty hallway. “What’s your problem?!” I shouted into his face. “My problem? No, what’s your problem?!”. I was this close to just going back in and ignoring him for the rest of my life, but something inside of me told me to keep going. It was now or never. “My problem is” I began. “You’re so fucking annoying and mean and selfish as fuck, only caring about yourself and never considering other people’s feelings! As if it wasn’t shitty enough how you broke things off, no you also have to flaunt your fling-”I knew it wasn’t just a fling, but honestly? I didn’t give a damn. He was rude, so I was being rude. “- into my face! Be secretive! Or at least just stop when I’m around. That’s all I’m asking from you”.

He didn’t say a single word. Not one. Instead he was searching my eyes, trying to see if I really meant what I just said. Seconds passed, turning into minutes. “Aren’t you going to say something? Defend yourself or whatever?”. Him staying silent made my blood boil because I felt ignored and just really stupid for straight up having an outburst without it affecting him. “There’s nothing to defend because you’re right. About everything. And I’m sorry for not realizing sooner how shitty I was behaving”. To say I was taken aback was an understatement. “That’s all?”. The silence was killing me and all I wanted was to go back to class. “No”. Grabbing my hand, he pulled me towards his chest. “What are you do-“ “Shut up”.

Next thing I knew, (I was pregnant) I felt his lips grazing mine and before I could stop him, he had already fully kissed me. I wanted to feel repulsed, I wanted to feel disgusted, I wanted to feel mad. But I couldn’t. I had missed him and I couldn’t deny it. When I pulled away, he tried to make me stay in place. That’s when my senses came back to me and reality hit me. “Dude, what’s wrong with you?! You have a new girl, remember?”. I pushed his chest, freeing myself. Once I was about to open the door again, I noticed that Zion still hadn’t moved an inch. Turning around, I wanted to tell him to move his ass back to class before both of us would get in trouble. But he never gave me a chance at that.

“I know, but I can’t get my real girl outta my head”.

Also2: I don’t know if I like this part, it’s more of a filler. I tried to put the focus on the relationship between her and Edwin, but also tried to give glimpses of the friendship between her and the rest of the boys. Zion isn’t included much because he’s always hanging out with that other chick. This part is set during the time where both of them try to avoid each other, so I wanted to make it as realistic as possible.

Let me know what your favorite part or line was! Hope you liked it xx

- Cami

[strydcr]

hellooo babes, i’m blair waldorf acacia (◠‿◠✿) nineteen, she/her, and the main admin here. lol sooo sorry you guys are all trapped in this rp with me. but wtver~ you guys will learn to adore my 3am messages comin’ up with plot that’ll hurt us and what not. also meet the beauty that is stryder estrellas. anyways, i’ll try to keep this as short as possible. since i always get lazy halfway thru writin’ intros. :~)) )) ) &&. of course this got way longer than expected so just find the ☪  at the end to read the summary // aim: alohacacia && skype: alohacacia

****psa you clicked on this so you’re obligated to plot with me srry but i don’t make the rules.

░   * . ╰ ✯ ›  ⊰ SELENA GOMEZ, CIS-FEMALE, TWENTY-THREE ⊱ is that STRYDER ESTRELLAS ? the BARISTA & FLORAL SHOP ASSISTANT MANAGER. they’re known to be INTELLIGENT & INDEPENDENT. but also BLUNT & CYNICAL. unknown to them, they are the reincarnation of PERSEPHONE.

BACKGROUND + TRIGGER WARNINGS: cheating 

well to kick things off, stryder is that one night stand baby. let’s call her biological dad “bio father/dad” and her mom’s husband “dad” then of course her mom is “mom”. sorry if this is confusing. but just think about how stryder is gonna feel once she finds out about this.

once upon a time her mom and her dad were happily in love. like they were the high school sweethearts who ended up getting married and blah blah blah. but before she was born, there was a point in time where the two broke up. probably once they were both about to start freshman year of college. that’s when her mom hooked up with stryder’s bio dad. she obviously ended up getting pregnant. but she ended up making up with stryder’s dad. SOOOOOOO…. he thinks he’s stryder’s father. but he ain’t. the one night stand hook up is.

stryder is completely unaware of the fact that he’s not her real father. her mom is still in contact with her biological dad. obviously, keeping that a secret from both her husband and stryder. but it’s only because her bio dad always sends her money to help provide for stryder. so basically this family is a mess. but only on the low. because on the outside this family is absolutely perfect. she grew up in a really nice household. suburban type of wealth in a town outside of los angeles, california. big house, nice cars, a vacation every now and then. but not rich enough to like be bill gates or something you get what i’m saying? just a nice upper middle class.

you might be wondering... how did they end up in seattle? one day her dad told the fam he had to move out to there because of work. (occupation: tbd) so they packed up everything they had and left. this was around the time stryder was starting her senior year of high school. stryder really isn’t the type to throw a fit over dumb shit. but you know this girl started bawling knowing she wasn’t going to graduate with her only two friends. ‘cause she had to start the loner life all over again.

now, stryder works at a small coffee shop as a barista and an assistant manager at a floral shop. (cause persephone, flowers, how cute.....) she does go to school at a community college about 30 minutes away from her house. probably studying to become a botanists. (a literal flowerchild yes.) and to her surprise she is actually enjoying living here. she doesn’t know why, but she feels drawn to the place.

PERSONALITY + RELATIONSHIPS + TRIGGER WARNINGS: anxiety 

PERSONALITY wise, she’s that tumblr post that’s like ——— me: i love myself i’m such a bitch // me: i hate myself i’m such a bitch. because one day she’ll be like “oh my god you’re my best friend!!!!!” then they’ll do her shady and she’ll be like “new phone who dis?” like do her dirty and she’ll get angry real quick. which is bad because it’ll trigger her anxiety. but yayayayayayayayyyyy. she’s the type to be sippin’ tea with her pinky finger up. she is the “is it bad that i secretly want to be hit by a car all the time” but also the “gotta better myself, my body, my skin and my bank account” type in one. she has a very clean exterior. although she outcast herself a lot. she does care about her appearance. (i.e. she has a sense of fashion.) she really likes to read and learn. so, you can always catch her doing something of the sort. talk to her about flowers or coffee and she gotchu. overall, stryder is pretty wishy washy. it all depends on her mood. she’s kind of a wallflower. isn’t exactly the most popular baby. but that’s by choice, not by force.

when it comes to FRIENDS stryder can always use some of 'em. she possess the qualities of a good friend loyal, honest, trustworthy. however, she can be quite obstinate. which might be a reason why she might not have as many friends as she would like. once her mind is set to think a certain way it’s hard to persuade her to believe otherwise. she’s the type of friend to listen to your problems, but be prepared to listen to her opinions – all of them. she’s also the type to put a friend in check when they need it. she thinks of it as trying to convince them to see the bigger picture. first impressions is something she might not be very good at. while she isn’t exactly the definition of rude, she tends to not filter then things she says. overall, i would say that she might just need a handful of friends and just a whole bunch of acquaintances.

i’m pretty sure stryder doesn’t think she has is ENEMIES. but, i could obviously understand why a girl like her would have any. she tends to be very outspoken and although she doesn’t mean to insult anyone or come off rude, she can’t help it. so, there’s always that. stryder is the type to hold grudges. (this is mostly because of her mother — trust issues man) she thinks once you fuck her over, then inevitably, you’re gonna do it again. basically, if you lose her trust everything you had, despite how far back your past goes, she isn’t going to trust you fully again. so if there was any type of fall out at all, stryder is gonna be pissed 5ever. but if in some point in time where she had to chose between her life and saving another’s, she’d save them before herself. stryder’s a good person guy’s. she has good morals. they’re just messed up in her black hole of thoughts. enemies? *grabby hands*

alright, so stryder and LOVERS. i have a feeling she’s dabbled in the dating world. she’s had a few boyfriends, dates, etc. but most likely nothing LONG TERM. possibly because she doesn’t see the point unless it’s for marriage. just like her mom and dad (lol troll.) she has the independent woman facade going on right now. which makes her seem like she doesn’t want anyone. but deep down she’s a hopeless romantic. this girl would love to be loved. and she truly needs it. most of the time she makes herself the outcast. this girl is completely oblivious to anyone having a crush on her. assuming friendship automatically. she’s probably read tons of books about love and fluffy shit like that. so she has high expectations when it comes to relationships. so someone rlly needs to come here and treat this girl right.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

FRIENDS

best friend — someone who will always be there for her. the person she feels most comfortable with. // m, f, or nb

partner in crime — they may not be the most reliable person like her best friend. but definitely someone she can get turnt tf up with. // m, f, or nb

childhood friend(s) — her first friend(s)! the one(s) she’s known since birth. she will never switch up on the real ones. (or so u think...) // m, f, or nb

ENEMIES

rivals — someone who hates her and some she hates too. maybe they just don’t get along yo. it happens // m, f, or nb

old bully — maybe somebody who bullied her or someone she might have bullied? bc honestly, if she bullied someone it would’ve been a joke. // m, f, or nb

old flame that didn’t end well — this is someone she used to date. maybe they wanted it to go further than just a date. but she ended up cutting ties with them. now it’s just made awk. // m, f, or nb

LOVERS

hate/love — just ‘cause these are my favorites. just little bickering. maybe they’re too much alike or just not a like at all. // m, f, or nb

old flame that ended well — the classic, exes that ended on good terms. they don’t hate each other at all. are actually still on really good terms. and possibly still have lingering feelings.  // m, f, or nb

currently dating — going on dates and what not. having a good time. who knows where this could go.  // m, f, or nb

MISCELLANEOUS

☪ overall, this bitch is flippy floppy. she’s loyal. quiet, but has a lot of opinions. intelligent, but sometimes stand-off-ish. she’s a bit of a feminist. trusts no bitch. but if you’re her friend, she’s chill AF. but really — she just doesn’t know how to process her good thoughts into words. she’s a barista and florist. she’s independent, hardworking, and determined. my muse for her is michelle (spider man homecoming) & margo roth spiegelman (paper towns). she’s a bit sketch when it comes to making new friends. since she’s a bit of a loner. and she’s super family oriented. despite her being absolutely oblivious to the fact that her mom cheated on her “dad” with her bio dad. anyways, give her girl scout cookies and she’ll love you til the end of time. overall, she’s not as lame as she portrays herself to be and is actually a pretty rad chick.

wEW this got waaaaaay longer than i expected it to be. anywho, if you actually read all this i love you and i cherish you hella. if you just skimmed, i would too. i would really love to plot with everyone. so just slide into my dms and we can get things started!! but okay, so, now imma go touch up my other intros. hope u don’t hate me after this long ass essay lmao. luv u *blows a kiss*

[aspirant-writer]

Hint of West: chapter 1

The early sunlight peeked through the curtains illuminating the room. A phone alarm went off and was quickly turned off with sudden movement. Lara stared at the ceiling, she hadn’t slept that night. She got up dragging her feet towards the bathroom, her reflection was what she had expected to be. Her hair was messy, there were dark circles under her eyes and a new pimple was now visible (because puberty was not yet ready to leave her). She tried to make herself look presentable, when she was done she left the room going downstairs towards the kitchen. Lara’s mother was already up making breakfast along with the house maid. A good smell stormed into her nose. The round glass kitchen table was luxuriously set and there seem to be a banquet being prepared.

- Mom, I told there was no need for this -she weakly protested, knowing there was nothing she could do now.

- Of course there is, you’re going back to Korea! And we have no idea when you’re coming back.

- I told you I’d be back soon - she whined.

- Last time you said that you ended up living there for 3 years - her mother shot her a resentful look. She left out a weak laugh.

When Lara finished high school in Brazil her parents decided to sent her on exchange until classes in her university started. It was supposed to be only a year, but she fell in love with Korea and enrolled a korean university.

- Already up? - Lara’s father asked while entering the kitchen looking surprised.

- Couldn’t sleep - she said with a soft smile.

- Your brother and your sister are coming, they should be here soon - he said taking a seat beside her.

-

When they were all together having a pleasant conversation about something not related to Lara’s departure her brother decided to take the subject back to the spotlight.

- When is the opening again?

- In two weeks - she simply responded hoping they would leave the subject.

- Is your brazilian partner going too? - her sister’s husband asked.

- Yes, he is actually, but he’s going next week.

- Why couldn’t you go next week? - her mother asked and she could sense the feeling of betrayal in those words.

- As I said before, I still have somethings to get settled.

There was a brief silence while everyone continued to eat, and Lara could sense that her mother was thinking about asking something and she knew just what it was about. This made her feeling uneasy and silently praying that her mother would come to her senses and not say anything. By the time she was already feeling safe her mother dropped:

- What about that boy? Are you still seeing him? - the girl froze on her seat and hoped no one was paying attention. Instead, everyone on the table was eagerly staring at her.

- No, there is no boy - she responded coldly trying to hide her annoyance.

- I thought you were all over each other, you looked so…

- Mom…- she said sharply interrupting the other woman - there is no one. - she stated squeezing the glass cup she had in hand so tight she feared it would break. Her mother nodded in agreement.

Now the room was awkwardly silent, taking a few minutes before everyone started chatting again, but this time Lara joined in none of the conversations, just nodding her head once in a while to someone’s question. Her head was now filled with flashbacks of the past that had haunted her for long. Just now, when she thought was finally healing someone decides to take the rug where she swept under all the dirt from the past and shake it up again. As she did so often she shoved the thoughts and feelings away, unwilling to get them settled into place as they should’ve been long before.

Time passed like a slow torture to Lara and she was glad when it was finally over. She said goodbye to her brother and sister along with their wife and husband. She had missed them a lot, but these past years they had been focusing on settling their own lives and so had she, so distance was something she had to accept. Her parents drove her to the airport, her departure was hurting them and she was able to perceive it. Used to having three kids at home they were now feeling lonely. Besides the fact that they never quite accepted that she chose South Korea over her own country.

They never accepted her going to Korea in the first place. Lara remembered when they first told her the exchange idea, they were so excited to provide this opportunity even if it meant being a whole year away from them. They wanted to send her to the United States or France, or some other western country. But unlike her parents she was craving for something different, something new and exciting, something that would completely change her perspective and that would be out of her comfort zone. And she could not resist when the travel agency employee told her a there was a spot in Korea, he parents were quick to politely decline but she told she was interested. She took two full weeks to make them agree with that decision. And all the time she was asked “Why so far away?”, “Why not practice your english?”. But she decided Korea and so it was. And just like then, now she was choosing Korea again.

- Take care, okay? - the older man said with teary eyes just before she took off to the boarding hall.

- I will, dad - she responded hugging him.

- Give us a heads up, alright? - her mother was already crying.

- Yes, ma'am - as she went to hug her.

-

Lara sat on the boarding hall waiting. She was immersed in thoughts when she felt her phone buzz. It was a message from her best friend in Korea.

“r u at the airport already?” woosokie, 12:07

“yeah just waiting for my plane, try not miss me too much, be right there in no time” you, 12:08

“actually i was expecting u would not come at all” woosokie, 12:14

“i not even in korea and u r already hurting my feelings damn!!! ungrateful child” you, 12:15

“kiddin u know i love ya, have a nice flight” woosokie, 12:19

“i know, thanks text u when i get there” you, 12:19

“u know i’d pick you up, but ill be stuck in cube” woosokie, 12:23

“its fine i know, imma a big girl i can do it myself, shouldn’t u be asleep?? its late!” you, 12:25

“i should haha imma get going now, safe trip! bye” woosokie, 12:26

“good night, bye!” you, 12:27

Wooseok was one of Lara’s best friends for three years now, since when she first got to Korea. She remembered the day they met as clear as day. The young girl had just gotten to Seoul, she wasn’t as confident as she was before and wondered if she would regret her choice. Everything was so different and new. She knew exactly four phrases in korean and they for sure were not enough to help her. As she entered the senior class in 2016 she spotted a seat next to this giant (almost scaring looking) guy. The nervous girl sat quietly until people approached her, they were all over her in a matter of minutes.

It was an understatement to say she was different. Her hair was straight bright ginger falling down to her lower back, her accentuated features, sharp nose, strong jaw line and hazel eyes contrasted among the soft and pleasing features of asians.

The students were very welcoming, offering her warm smiles and even communicating to her in english. Her anxiety was relieved. But when the bell rang and it was break time her lack of confidence came striking once more. Where would she go? What would she eat? Would she be alone? She never spent break alone. She was about to have a meltdown when she felt someone poking her shoulder. The brazilian found the giant guy stand next to her (he seemed even taller), it scared her at first, which resulted in him being worried and repeatedly saying the same words that at the time she didn’t understand (later she found out he was apologizing).

When he realized she wasn’t understanding a word he said, the boy tried his best to talk to her in english. They ended up having lunch together that day with his friends and it had sealed the deal between them. She would always seat close to him and try her best not to push it (or at least look like she wasn’t trying), but Wooseok seemed more than happy to allow her in his life.

She never wondered it would’ve made it this far, but his friendship proved everyday he was the one supposed to be friends with her. They were so attached during that year that people would even question if it was just friendship.

Wooseok many times shared his dreams of being in a kpop group and being a rapper, he would tell her about being a trainee and explained how it all worked since she was clearly clueless. The young girl gladly listened to all of it. Even when he tried to hide his excitement she could feel how much passion he had and she supported him every step of the way. Whilst Lara would tell him how she was lost in life, wondering if she was doing the right thing all the time, she had no clue what path to follow and was just going with the flow. As her bestfriend he advised the best he could, but being younger didn’t quite help, even so she appreciated it nonetheless.

That year in Korea opened her eyes, she felt more mature, confident, wiser. But she wasn’t ready to go back to Brazil just yet. So she secretly applied to a korean university, she didn’t put much hope into it, she had definitely been a top student in Brazil, but would it be enough? She didn’t tell anyone, if she wasn’t accepted no one’s feelings would be hurt, if she was she would just have to convince her parents.

During that same time Wooseok was getting serious at Cube and he (along with two other members) went to her school. She finally got to meet the some of the people he was with all the time (and that she had been secretly jealous for stealing his time). She always wondered why he never introduced then to her, she even thought he was embarrassed of her, he would only tell her why several months later.

—

author’s note: oh hey! so this is the first chapter, i hope you liked it (if you did message me or like this post idk). its long i know (do you guys enjoy long chapters? let me know). just to clear somethings out: this is a future fic (2 years in the future to be exact) so the first few chapters will be longer so i can explain the past yada yada. anyways, feed me back!