#okay i didmt use all your tags bc i need enpugh space to rant

[inspiricons]

@lilithpooped hey there! Thanks a lot for writing this from the deepest of your heart sincerely, i can feel it. I hope tumblr didnt eat the asks i sent you (i sent 2 of them after you answered two yesterday i think). Even if it did, i can tell you again: I would love it if you tag me in anything you write! (I will cry from softness if/whenever you do)

I ranted A LOT in the tags so until i find a better way to gush over your writing, we will be here! Ellerine, düşüncelerine ve duygularına sağlık!

Lullaby - Song Mingi

Genre: I don’t know, it probably counts as fluff but its kinda sad and fluff

A/N: I actually wanted to write a real fluff for Mingi but this one reflects my own thoughts and feelings at the moment and it kinda helped me. So if anyone cares, I will also write a real fluff for Mingi after finishing all of Ateez. Please let me know if you like it or not, I’m always open to criticism and I appreciate your comments. Thank you for reading my fics. And I’m sorry this one is a little shorter than the others but I really pushed myself to write it so i could feel better. Wow that’s a long a/n.

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“It’s okay Mingi. Don’t worry, I’m not sad anymore. I just wanna be alone” 

 “You sure? Cuz I can prepare you food and we can watch movies together? And maybe we can go to arcade-“

“I’m sure. I just don’t wanna be around anyone. It’s not about you, please don’t get me wrong. I’m just tired.”

“Okay, but you can call me anytime okay? If you need anything, just call me okay??”

“Yes, thank you.”

Like that, Mingi left your house. You were glad you had a boyfriend like him. He was always so understanding and cute, he always hyped you up, he was everything someone like you could want in life.

He knew you were having hard times. You shared everything with each other. He was just not sure about how he could help you. He wanted to make you happy, to help you. But you were pulling yourself back. So he had nothing he could do other than to wait for you to open up again. He turned back to his place but he couldn’t get you out of his mind. So he decided to play games. An hour passed.. Then another… Then five more.. He was worried about you but he didn’t want to bother so he just stayed quiet. Until his phone rang. It was you.

“Hey babe”

“Mingi can you come over?..”

He knew you were crying.

“Okay baby, do you want anything? Ice cream? Jellies? Chocolate?”

“No, can you please be quick..”

“Okay I’m on my way baby, we can stay on the phone if you want?”

“No, be careful. I love you”

“I love you too, y/n.”

You were so overwhelmed and sad, you couldn’t even think about something else than to hug Mingi. You got up and out of bed to wash your face but seeing yourself in the mirror caused you to sob even more. You gave up trying to look okay and just buried yourself in bed again.

Mingi had the keys to your apartment so he just opened the door and walked to your room with an orchid pot in his hands. Orchids were your favourite flowers and he of course knew it. He also knew that you liked planted flowers, not the plucked ones. He again knew you would be crying under your blanket. He just stood at your door and waited for a while. He hated seeing you like this. It was not a first but you definitely weren’t like this most of the times, you were a sunshine. His sunshine.. That was why when he heard your cries, his eyes also got teary. He took a deep breath and stepped inside your room.

“Y/n, I’m here.”

He put the flower on your desk and sat on the bed, took the blanket on your head and looked at your red eyes.

“Baby, I’m here. You wanna hug? Come on, let’s stay in bed and cuddle for a while. Come here baby.”

He opened his arms for you to cuddle. He sat a little back,leaning the headboard of your bed. You hugged him and put your head on his chest. He started caressing your hair slowly.

“How do you feel baby? Do you feel a bit better now?”

“Yes,” you whispered and then sniffed, “yes, thank you Mingi.”

“Don’t worry, y/n. I’ll always be here. You can always trust me. Do you wanna talk about your feelings? Or maybe you would want to just cuddle and stay silent?”

“I don’t know what to say. I don’t know the reason why I’m sad. I just want someone to be with me but I also don’t want anyone to be with me. I’m so tired of myself, you have no idea. I just want my head to blow up. I don’t wanna think anymore. The thoughts keep coming and they are loud and I just… I just can’t stop thinking. I don’t want to hear my thoughts anymore. I just want a peaceful sleep but I can’t even sleep while thinking about everything. I’m so tired.”

“It’s okay to be tired, y/n. Don’t push yourself to not be tired. I wish I could help you with your thoughts but I just don’t know what can I do. Just know that I’m always here and ready to help. And I swear it’s normal and okay to be tired. You should stop pushing yourself to be okay and happy every time. You should just accept what you’re feeling and know that these feelings are temporary. If you feel them fully now, you’ll soon feel better. I love you and I will always be there for you.”

“Thank you.. Can you.. Can you sing me a song?”

“Y/n, baby okay I’m gonna sing but don’t mock me, okay?”

He said these in a teasing tone and that made you smile. You loved this man, he always knew how to make you smile.

“I can’t promise, Song Mingi. Just try your best.”

You teased him this time. He laughed a little and started to sing a lullaby. You took a deep breath and let your mind ease. His singing voice was not the best but it definitely was the best for you. You closed your eyes and whispered:

“Keep singing, I love your voice.”

He smiled while still singing and caressing your hair.

Soon your breath slowed down, you fell asleep.

“I hope you feel better when you wake up, y/n. I love you so much.” he whispered while kissing your hair.