#ok thats a lie theres still characters i dont trust but i cant tell u WHY i dont trust them so like. THERES SOME INTERNAL SHIT FOR ME PROLLY

[splendidshinobi]

FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST 2003 LIVE REACT: EPISODES 21-25

almost halfway done lads how we feelin'

episode 21: the red glow

ah yes barry

"i'm alphonse elric!!!!!" yes u r baby!!!

who just popped over the wall

scar im assuming

"i kill therefore i am".....barry spouting descartes rn

it was scar haha

um

hi greed

thought i saw you earlier

WHY DID THEY DRAW HIS ARMS THAT LONG

ope he found the chimera crew...

jerry jewell's evil laugh gets me every time lmao he's so great

ed has deep philosophical talks bro

also ed is chaotic but his personal morals are unshakeable

who are these prison guards gonna release

oh hey kimblee

oh hey squad

ed take out ur pokeball

um wth is that

OH MY GOD TUCKER WHAT

EW

I THOUGHT IT WAS A GIANT YODA OR A SWAMP MONSTER

he looks FUCKKEDDDD

bro of all the things i was not expecting him

oof ishval flashbacks

young scar why is your hair brown

why is it white now

WHY IS HE NAKED

whos her

lust 1.0 im assuming

ew omg tucker is literally so fuckin nasty lookin idk

idk why but he's worse than rod reiss titan for me

wait a damn minute

wait a damn fucking minute

goddamnit

what is GOIN ON

i need tucker to stop whispering he sounds like fucking voldemort on the back of quirrells head

jesus

episode 22: created human

hughes' pajamas look like armin's futon from aot junior high

the bad place???? was that greed's prison gluttony was lookin at?

im still shook af over tucker and tbh its been like 24 hours since i watched episode 21

STOP WHISPERING TUCKER

driving me up a wall

my poor son looks so tired :(

those moral principles at it again

bradley.......

ewww the way tucker walks STOP

hi envy!!!!!

so all of those prisoner guys gonna get flattened by some alchemy

hey kimblee!!!

so did greed escape with the homies???? cause i feel like he would have made his presence known already....

i feel like im missing a lot because im a ding dong

musty prison kimblee is kinda...hot....physically speaking..oops..personality wise obviously there's MUCH to work on

so envy knows hohenheim

ED BABY

he won't do it

oh no alphonse

oh god memory implants

al's identity crisis CONTINUES

they wanna become humans??? huh....doesnt really make sense for their characters...(maybe envy but more on that at 11)

is ed gonna kill these guys for al

some1!!!!!! hold!!!!! me!!!! im so stressed

is he pretending to do it and he's got another plan up his sleeve!!!!????

honestly he's so depressed i cant even tell

those unshakable moral principles at work again i see

the red water can turn ed into a god???? wtf ed doesnt want to be a god he wants to punch god

oh theres the greed squad! i found them!!! is kimblee joining up with them

maria girly!!!!!!!

THE HOMUNCULI IN THEIR STUPID UNIFORMS I--

who's the lady. i need 2 know.

episode 23: fullmetal heart

alphonse is destroyed again

poor kid

"edward sir" brosh pls!!!

oh excuse me--- ***Bloch

The Ross Slap™

winry <3

pinako takes no prisoners

ed didnt you JUST tell brosh and ross they might be right that you needed to trust adults with more shit and now youre blowing off hughes

ed's DRAWINGS im-

hi sig hi izumi!!!

al is so sad over there in that corner

poor baby son

sometimes i feel like hughes and mustang are ed and al's divorced dads

the little arakawa avatar cows in the back im CRYING!!!!!!!

“bean”

snappy al

ooffffffff

omg hughes plz

elicia is precious though we love her

"dad's friend the bookworm" omg sheska

awwww gracia made edward a cake!!!!!!!

god catch me cryin in the club

CONGRATULATIONS

"whatever" al im crying he's so sad

AL MADE BROSH OR WHOEVER CARRY HIS DESTROYED ARMOR TO THE ROOF IM ACTUALLY YELLING

"you goof"

yes winry you are correct boy is a goof

sir you are being so dramatic

give that baby a hug

"so called brother"

so we all know that was a knife through the heart for ed

al just jumped off a FUCKING ROOF and ED TRIED TO FOLLOW

so im crying

i liked this better when they HAD A CONVERSATION ABOUT AL'S FEARS AND MADE THE FUCK UP

episode 24: bonding memories

guess we're gonna play w my emotions again

sometimes like....one bit characters talk...like villager b ya know? and im like who are you i know that voice

so the nasty military has come to ruin some lives again

and barry for some reason

aww poor al

youre real you are!!!!!!

i just feel like people would know people that wear sunglasses in the rain would be ishvalan

but what do i know

obviously they dont have the white hair thing in this version

poor ed is so sad

these boys need a hug 

let me just *pulls out adoption papers*

well if scar doesnt have queen mei to adopt in 03, he’s got this little toothless boy

dont lie al you do care

ew i dont like her

the drama of this boy

so the nasty military has come to ruin some lives again part 2

apparently they are *mercenaries??? excuse me

i have some questions regarding this kid’s mom

well you know i can see why this kid feels this way about his mom

it does look like she ran off...

al and scar dream team up

HEY ED!!! HEY WINRY!!!

bout time

yall gonna have this talk now????

barry STOPPPPPP

brotherhood barry is the true king there i said it

damn scar you baddie

barry like....you already knew him

anyway

WHAT THE HELL

NO RICKKK!!!!!!

someone save this boy!!!!

oh good his mom “saved” him

ah damn thats pretty tragic

she didnt know they were right in front of her

ow

well my questions were answered

so she attacks with grape fanta. thats one way to do it

ed looks like such an angry gremlin right now this is a heartwarming moment sir please

why are ed and scar being so civil right now this is so weird

bye scar

we’ll see him again

see you later scar

episode 25: words of farewell

maes who let you buy that awful pink suit 

gracia please it better not have been you

mustang ew please

dont open the door lookin like that

what the hell are you doing in here 

so hughes WASNT in ishval here?

i think that takes a lot away from his character but anyway

bradley hangs around like a creep at every possible instant

why would bradley care about ishvalan refugees like hughes cmon

“unspeakable crimes” BRADLEY YOU LITERALLY CANNOT TALK

juliet douglas is this lady’s name

only took me 1000 episodes to figure that out

ED AND AL??? NOT DEALING WITH DANGEROUS THINGS??????? dont make me laugh assholes theyre lying thru their teeth

izumi time lets go

wow we’re still going to rush valley? wasnt really expecting that tbh

elicia i LOVE you!!!!!

ew kimblee “hi”

how did he lightning himself like that

if i were ishvalan i would not go to the south....yet ANOTHER war torn region of amestris but ok

okay

an amestrian desert biker gang rolled up to wreak havoc

HUGHES AHAHAHA 

tbh i wouldnt want to tell roy anything either stupid bitch

anyway

um why do i feel like its hughes’ death episode

he would not be shown tucking elicia in to bed otherwise 

please im not ready to be hurt again

oh no

yeah he just learned something about our girl juliet

ive been waiting for this information 

he’s gonna die before we learn anything helpful

yupppppp

hey lust figured you’d show up sooner or later

i too wish i could look that sexy pulling a kunai out of my forehead

SLOTH????????

did girly just say SLOTH

i- nothing about her seems particularly slothy but ok

u know what!!!!!!!!!!!!

ENVY HEYYY

DUMBASS ROY JUST HAAAAAD TO LEAVE

haha famous last words

oof it hurts every time

not the FUNERAL scene no!

time for me to go 

peace out homies im dead inside

yes my brigadier general 

NOT THE RAIN

COME ONNNNNN

hughes is sneezing six feet under

was ed supposed to be looking at hughes’ ghost

um....right

[daffydo]

Feast For A King by @kosmicdream has captured my heart; here are some of my favorite horrible boys

[artificialcats]

1 - 150

omg thanks answers under the cut bc this is going to b long

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

tbh dont even remember but ive never like, held hands w anyone ~romantically~ or w/e

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

SHY but i have my more outgoing moments every once in a while

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

Quinn!!! and my other friends and my sister back home :-) and my cat

4. Are you easy to get along with?

uhh idk? i guess?

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

tbh dont know 

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

nice ones. cute ones. ones interested in the same stuff as me ?

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

my friend did a tarot reading for me a week ago and when i asked if id have a gf this year the answer was not good lmao so doubtful

8. Who from another gender is on your mind?

idk?

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

im p indifferent

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

tbh my memory is garbage idk

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“signing tomorrow at 3:30″ cryptic out of context

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

the traveller- beach house (just walked to it in a fashion show! its good), boyfriend--best coast, sleepover--hayley kiyoko, forever (pt II)--snakehips, and a variety of tennis songs i cant choose from 

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

ya

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

not particularly

15. What good thing happened this summer?

last summer i got to do a bunch of fun stuff w different friends! 

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

ive never kissed anyone before LMAO (last “person” ive ever kissed was my cat on the head and ya id do that again)

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

I MEAN like the universe is so expansive theres no way theres NOT some other form of life out there 

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

lmao no 

19. Do you like bubble baths?

nah i dont like baths 

20. Do you like your neighbors?

at home yes (QUINN!!) and no (dont talk to anyone else) 

21. What are you bad habits?

nail picking, a lot of other stuff im too tired to list rn

22. Where would you like to travel?

would love to road trip it across the west

23. Do you have trust issues?

maybe? idk

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

moisturizing 

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

tbh feeling p good abt my body rn.. maybe my shoulders.. ive always disliked how square they r..

26. What do you do when you wake up?

p much immediately get in the shower

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

never thought abt it

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

my close friends

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

i dont have any exes

30. Do you ever want to get married?

maybe someday but not for a loooong long time

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?

no

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

im ace so like,, none of them 

33. Spell your name with your chin.

losauirtfsa

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

nope. used to play tennis tho

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

probably tv. love music too much

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

HA ofc living that life rn

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

uh probably nothing

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

nice, supportive, is willing to dance around to/sing along w 70s/80s/2000s music w me 

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

thrift stores probably.. never know what youre going to find

40. What do you want to do after high school?

well rn im in college and thats p much what i was going for in high school so 

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

nah

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

probably just that i dont feel like talking? or im tired

43. Do you smile at strangers?

usually

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

outer space theres some whack stuff in the ocean

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

idk

46. What are you paranoid about?

a looot of things LMAO

47. Have you ever been high?

nope

48. Have you ever been drunk?

nope

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

no

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

grey

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

sometimes but usually just in like a ‘they look rlly cool’ or ‘i rlly like their style’ kind of way like just kind of envious

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

probably like, throwing my depression out the window

53. Favourite makeup brand?

dont wear makeup enough lmao

54. Favourite store?

tbh dont rlly have one also this is rlly similar to  previous question?

55. Favourite blog?

i love the househunting blog but idk if i rlly have a favorite

56. Favourite colour?

PINK

57. Favourite food? 

chicken bc theres so much good stuff u can do w it

58. Last thing you ate?

mini twix bar 

59. First thing you ate this morning?

eggs on toast

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

yea won a couple different ones for art related stuff

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

nope

62. Been arrested? For what?

nope

63. Ever been in love? 

platonically ya romantically no i dont think so

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

a short one: never happened

65. Are you hungry right now?

no ive been snacking all night lol

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

my tumblr friends p much are my rl friends so,, no

67. Facebook or Twitter?

twitter

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now?

no

70. Names of your bestfriends? 

quinn

71. Craving something? What?

the sweet warm embrace of my bed

72. What colour are your towels?

one is pastel blue one is black/white/grey stripe

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

two

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

yea. i have a big pusheen plush and at home a mini dino pillow pet n a cat plush

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

like.. 3 i think? i used to have a L O T 

75. Favourite animal?

cats

76. What colour is your underwear?

black

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

vanilla

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

once i had cardamom n it was rlly rlly good 

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

white w blue stripes

80. What colour pants?

jean overalls

81. Favourite tv show?

OOGH rn the getdown, stranger things, parks n rec, x files, downton abbey, charmed, a lot, 

82. Favourite movie?

jurassic park

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

neither

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

neither

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

dont have one

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

idk maybe nemo? never rlyl though abt it

87. First person you talked to today?

my mom

88. Last person you talked to today?

my sister

89. Name a person you hate?

idk

90. Name a person you love?

all my friends

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

not anyone i kno personally

92. In a fight with someone?

idk

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

like one pair and i never wear them lmao

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

a couple

95. Last movie you watched?

ella enchanted

96. Favourite actress?

no one comes to mind ?

97. Favourite actor?

idk jeff goldblum? 

98. Do you tan a lot?

no

99. Have any pets?

yes!! two cats

100. How are you feeling?

tired but ok

101. Do you type fast?

i think so yea

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

idk

103. Can you spell well?

im ok

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

kind of but i know we’re so different now we probably wouldnt even get along.. its not a miss i feel all the time tho more of a ‘we knew each other for so long its kind of sad we grew apart’

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

i want to say yes but it wasnt like a party party

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

not that i know

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

yes

108. What should you be doing?

my homework 

109. Is something irritating you right now?

school. im ready to get out of here

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

i dont think so

111. Do you have trust issues?

wasnt this question already asked

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

my friend steph i think (over the final fantasy ending LMAO)

113. What was your childhood nickname?

i dont think i had one

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yea

115. Do you play the Wii?

not a lot no

116. Are you listening to music right now?

yep (rn its 0 to 100 by drake on shuffle)

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

not really. i like the broth tho

118. Do you like Chinese food?

ya

119. Favourite book?

aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

depends

121. Are you mean?

i try not to be

122. Is cheating ever okay?

nah

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

NO LMAO i have a bad habit of standing on my own feet my white shoes r so gross

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

idk

125. Do you believe in true love?

idk

126. Are you currently bored?

not rlly

127. What makes you happy?

my friends, cats, pink, good food, nature, making my own art, old houses n rooms, lots of stuff

128. Would you change your name?

never thought about it

129. What your zodiac sign?

aries

130. Do you like subway?

not rlly

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

what

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

im p sure this ? was already asked

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

134. Can you count to one million?

y

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

dont remember but lots of em

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

closed. i cant sleep w them open 

137. How tall are you?

5′10″

138. Curly or Straight hair?

i have straight hair

139. Brunette or Blonde?

im blonde? i dont kno if theses r refering to me or what i prefer on other people?

140. Summer or Winter? 

summer

141. Night or Day?

tbh a tie

142. Favourite month?

dont have one!

143. Are you a vegetarian?

no

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

milk

145. Tea or Coffee?

neither

146. Was today a good day?

it was ok

147. Mars or Snickers?

no preference

148. What’s your favourite quote?

dont have one

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

i mean i dont not believe in ghosts

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? 

“Grant said “what did you think?”” -Jurassic Park

[frop]

do all of them you mother fucker

not Once but Twice u have done this to m 

Star Platinum – Your thoughts on the stars? i always did like then when i was younger but now they just make me think of jojo so now i especially like them 

Magician’s Red – Do you know any magic tricks? no but im gonna say what u said and i can bend my fingers waay way farther than most people

Hermit Purple – Show a photo of yourself! I HAVENT taken a selfie in forever i’ll do one later 

Silver Chariot (Requiem) – How much sleep do you need on average? i would love a good 10+ but i only get that much on saturday now boo but on average its like 6-7 

The Fool – Tell us a joke! Is your refrigerator running? Because i’m gonna suck your dick

The World -  A place you want to visit? canada like you would not believe 

Crazy Diamond – What do you treasure the most? hmmmmmmm my friendships with my friends 

The Hand – Do you like your hands? nnnot particularly bc i spent a good portion of my life and still do sometimes where i bit my nails til they bleed so they dont look as nice as i’d like them to be when they grow out 

Echoes – Your favourite sound? The world’s time stop sound, but not jotaro’s version, dio’s specifically

Heaven’s Door – Share a secret! my parents’ divorce has made me scared for the future of my own relationships to the point where i can see myself not ever wanting to be in a relationship ever again bc it would be easier than my partner getting tired of me or hating me. on top of the fact that i’m almost exactly like my father and my mom’s ex fiance in every single emotional department which is what caused their divorce/breakup respectively in the first place and that leads me to believe that in the long run i am Romantically  Unlovable 

Killer Queen – How would you like to die? preferably quick and painless 

Bad Company – What kind of character trades do you dislike? any character that is like ‘waahh wah no one understands me bc i enjoy [’highly advanced’ niche series/book/etc] and they all read [popular series/book/etc] like whatever the fuck his name was in aku no hana, it got so obnoxious i had to drop it lmao 

Red Hot Chili Pepper – Can you handle spicy food? cat’s out of the bag guys im actually a Fake Mexican bc i only like mild stuff and hot chips 

The Lock – Anything you feel guilty about right now? ya but thats for another day 

Love Deluxe – Are you secretly in love with someone right now? its absolutely no secret that i am in love with jonathan joestar 

Pearl Jam – Your signature dish? i can make some mean ass rice apparently 

Achtung Baby – Do you want kids? nnnope no thanks never ever i have my cat and thats enough for me 

Harvest – Do you pick up coins in from the street? no bc u dont know where thats been and money is super dirty already 

Cinderella – Which part of your body do you like the most? dang, i guess my thighs? but lately i’ve been a lot easier on myself abt my stomach and how soft it is 

Atom Heart Father – How is your relationship with your father? pretty good bc we’re really alike in temperament too but sometimes it gets pretty awkward bc he can never see me as anything but his little baby daughter who Never Grows Up

Enigma – What is puzzling you currently? when is davidpro gonna drop the part 5 teaser 

Earth Wind and Fire – What’s the best classical element? i personally have always liked fire 

Stray Cat – Cats or dogs? i love both but man im more suited for cats 

Gold Experience – A precious experience you have not shared with your followers? oh man over this summer my dad his gf and me and my sis when on a trip to her dad’s place in this really small town that was like 3 hours away from our city and it was so nice and quiet and peaceful and i felt so clean and happy there, we were only there for a couple days but ever since i’ve really been wanting to go back

Sticky Fingers – Zippers or buttons? zippers are so much faster but they get caught sometimes so Really, pros and cons of each 

Moody Blues – A song that makes you sad? OOO man i was gonna say epitaph bc Of Course but as i was writing this down melancholy man by moody blues came up on this playlist and now im thinkin abt abba and crying 

Sex Pistols – Have you ever shot a gun or riffle? no im tiny and a weenie and i would probably die from the recoil

Aerosmith – Are you afraid of flights? ive never been on one but i am scared of heights so i cant imagine thats any better 

Purple Haze – What makes you really angry? it used to be not being listened to but now i just let it happen bc Why bother but now its more whenever my mom makes a big deal out of simple mistakes of waiters/waitresses or when shes being obviously racist 

Spice Girl – Your favourite spice? idk what its called but theres this one i like to put on fruit before i eat it to make it Spicy 

King Crimson – Is it possible to predict the future? man idk my mom says yea but who knows 

Black Sabbath – How easily do you trust people? like stupidly easy 

Man in the Mirror – Do you like looking into the mirror? nope lol im ugl. ALSO bc i have a bigger than average fear of reflective stuff in general bc what if i see somethign behind me u kno,,,, 

Beach Boy – Have you ever been fishing? nope! the one time my dad went that i knew abt i was in mexico 

The Grateful Dead – What do you want to be remembered for? honestly, anything else that being the ‘way too nice one’ or the doormat 

White Album – Your favourite CD? aaaaa i dont have one i dont really listen to albums 

Talking Head – Are you a good liar? i guess ? i can keep a pretty straight face but its harder to lie to someone i actually know really well bc they can probably tell what my tics are 

Baby Face – Your thought on babies? theyre cute but i would greatly prefer to never have any 

Metallica – Do you like listening to metal? yea

Green Day – Ideal way to spend a day off? sleep, Sleep, stream with friends and lay in bed

Oasis – Best place for a holiday? hhhhh anyplace that relaxes u tbh 

Stone Free – Are you a indoor or outdoor person? i n d o o r i dont like bugs 

Kiss – Who would you like to kiss or get a kiss from? jonathan joest

Burning Down the House – Ever destroyed something and then regretted it? nah, once again im a weenie and im too worried abt consequences to ever do smth like that

Foo Fighters – Your favourite drink? god damn i fucking love raspberry iced tea 

Diverdown – Your thoughts on diving? the ocean fills me with the fear of god. no thanks 

C-Moon – What would you do for your friend’s sake? put myself in bodly harm 

MadeinHeaven – What do you believe happens after you died? nothing tbh you just end up in a grave or urn or wherever u wanted to be put 

Weather Report – Your favourite weather? man i looove love stormy weather 

Whitesnake – Your thoughts on snakes/reptiles? i love them theyre all gorgeous and beautiful

Tusk – Tea or coffee? coffee

Ball Breaker – Your favourite ball game? to play? its basket ball but to watch baseball 

Oh! Lonesome Me – Do you feel lonely right now? no not right now but im sure it’ll happen soon 

Scary Monsters – Your favourite dinosaur? i love velociraptors and also triceratops !!

Cream Starter – Do you usually wear make up? nope and if i do its only ever lipstick

Catch the Rainbow – Your favourite colour in the rainbow? blue and green!! 

Ticket to Ride – What was the last ticket you bought for? i didnt buy it but the last one i had was for the rogue one like. 2 weeks ago

Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap – Do you believe in the multiverse? i dont think abt it too often but sure

In a Silent Way – Do you enjoy complete silence? yes!! besides some music, i cant concentrate otherwise 

Soft & Wet – Shower or bath? shower bc its easier but i havent taken a bath in forever 

Paisley Park – How good are you with reading maps/directions? Terrible God Awful

Nut King Call – How good are you at assembling/constructing things like Ikea furniture? hmm it depends if i have the manual for it and if i have time to really think on it and im not in a rush or anything

Paper Moon King – Can you do any origami? nope 

King Nothing – Your favourite smell? i really like the smell of cinnamon 

BornThisWay – A strange habit you have? i crack my fingers all the damn time and i like to take off the little plastic circle off of soda bottles and chew on it 

Les Feulies – Your favourite plant? oh damn hmm i like lavenders 

Fun Fun Fun – Something you really enjoy doing? man. i could watch jojo a million times over and i’d never get bored of it 

California King Bed – What size is your bed? currently i sleep in a queen size bc my mom and sis and i share a bed bc we only had one room in our old apartment but now that we moved im sure i’ll be kicked off into a twin soon enough 

JESUS christ ok its almost midnight i hope ur happy you mother fuckre 

[pinksweatergettingbetter]

MAYA I TRUSTED YOU

WHAT WOULD WILL POWERS SAY

ok he'd probably be like ‘hehe; guess I'm falling further into obscurity thats cool i was never amazing in the first place’

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“theres only one!”

...that is rare

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“i traded my watch to my kooraheenese friend! it plays the steel samurai theme when it goes off!”

I SMELL A CHEKOVS GUN

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“it sounds just like the steel samurai theme”

“no it doesn't!”

mayas right, it doesn't sound like the steel samurai's theme. 

it sounds BAD.

seriously i feel like my soul is physically rejecting it 

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put your arms akimbo at me again young lady and ill push you into your magic soul pool.

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“that whole séance thing makes trials completely different”

meh

speaking of trials, we’re back to trials! ya–– i dont want to deal with nahyuta

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“you have to pitch your terrible crossover!! i won't let you down”

as much as i disapprove of the crossover let it be known that phoenix is a sweetie pie.

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“The sacred murder dagger was used to murder someone?!?!??! BLASPHEMY!!!”

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“The lowest level of hell; the Hell of Tickling” IM KINKSHAMING KOOORAHEENISM

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“They shall not escape on their /redtext/ Freedom Express today!”

she did it yaaaaayy!

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U R DIARHOEA!!! KOORAHEEN!!!

well i

i cant argue....

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oh god no t voice acting again

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LOL YOU CAN SKIP IT AHAHHAHHA

AND THE DANCE TOO HJDSJSFAKJ

guess its not *that* important eh

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the entire court just called phoenix a shithead. 

i mean people say “Polkhunka” when theyre surprised, and the term is “polkhunan”. so yeah. either hellion, or shithead. nice.

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phoenix: this makes no sense 

me: ooh i cant wait for the bullshit excuse!! 

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Well ill be damned to tickle-hell. Rayfa’s a television aerial. 

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oh i see how they did that. i guess spirit visions have steady-cam?

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.........he ran right into it

dude why 

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i just love this. “yes he ran directly at the killer, to fight them! with his arms flailing in terror!! it might look stupid and fake but actually it’s kooraheen’s biggest martial art, RonDeliteFu!”

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every time Rayfa does her hand-flinging-out pose i mistake her sash for a stick and i keep thinking she’s a muppet 

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“we can’t let the special fires go out, so we make sure to remove the glass around them every year on top of a window mountain so that a woman can um...... walk around it i guess.”

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i hate to admit it but these stupid pond vision things are really stumping my blind ass

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i stg pohlkunka is the stupidest sounding made-up expletive ive ever heard

id rather heard cowabunga every time something shocking happens for godssakes

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“wow he really does care about ema”

hey show dont tell lol

“i cant believe he's come to understand their value”

uhhh well

they stated that they still hold investigations despite their magic pool parties, so uhhhhhhh yeah???? forensic investigators are usually pretty helpful??

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since Sadmad’s catchphrase appears to be ‘putrid’, i keep reading ‘purification rite’ as ‘putrification rite’

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i cant believe they did a “what if... (EXTREME CLOSE UP ZOOM) PLOT TWIST?!”

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STOP SAYING PUTRID

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oh hey its dirty hobo man! ...also i guess the ‘sexy pan up shot’ is for every new character :/

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hobo rangers go...

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...Nahyuta named him A’nohn Ihmus. A’nohn Ihmus.

Well that just cements my idea that Kooraheenians are just a bunch of Americans that stole a landmass and made up a phony baloney culture. 

It has been confirmed that they are legitimately just taking english words and ‘kooraheenifying’ them.

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“i used my binoculars to spy on the rite at the inner sanctum”

A’nohn is just as perverted as his namesake from Tuhmbl’r

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“Feh. I knew you were a fool...” 

Cue Franziska crashing her plane into the court room to yank on Sadmad’s braid to scold him for taking her word.

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“shall be reborn as a witless sea urchin with barbs limited to your posterior”

ok well sadmad, sea urchins asses are next to their mouths... on the bottom of them. completely opposite to the, uh, you know. Spiky part.

So I’m not sure if that serves to strengthen your point or just make you look like a moron

i mean i guess it served to enhance sadmad’s point since phoenix’d be totally smooth and unprotected, but then he wouldn’t even reach adulthood so that sea otter wouldn’t come in too early and...

...he just said phoenix will be reborn as not only mentally slow but also physically deformed.

...uh... nice one, sadmad.

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AND MAYA PULLED A REACHAROUND ON THE PRIEST 

YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST FROM THE HOLY MONK, GUYS

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to be fair, she could have stabbed him with a reverse-grip or not; one doesn’t have to hold their hand at any particular to perform a reach around 

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oh well at least the contradiction is incredibly obvious 

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at least hobo ranger has an excuse to use words like “bucko”

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i hate that,,,, theres a rule against climbing the mountains during the rite. that means that there have been perverts of yore who tried to spy on the lady changing 

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hes gonna see her shad–– (sigh)

yknow, i dont think shadows are detailed enough to know which way someone is holding a knife.

also moonlight isn't that bright 

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DWAAYYYYMMMN

sasquatch’d!!

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ok so... does happiraki mean “hello” or “hooray!” because its been used it both contexts 

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i just realized that the Plumed Punisher theme song sounds like one of those posts where someone takes a recognizable song and fucks with it in a silly way, like pitch shifting it at awkward moments or changing the key

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i cannot believe i have to use a fucking walkthrough for this game. I'm disgusted with myself. I'm better than this.

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“no one was allowed in there and the only way up were the stairs!”

ah yes, the unguarded stairs surrounded by people who had their heads down. in prayer.

totally impenetrable. 

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“What?! This is insane!!” no no, phoenix, youre doing it wrong. you have to say “this”, then sadmad has to say “is” and then the judge has to yell “insaaaaane!!” because its funny when one person says one word of a sentence each!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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‘rah rah sis boom bah, fight, fight, phoenix wright!!”

um excuse me maya who gave you the right to be cute

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why does sadmad only have one hand-guard-glove thingy

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“my bag of bluffs” is an interesting and long way to say “ass”

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they put... a maximum security prison... on top of their holy mountain. they put their criminals... on top of their. holy mountain.

they put a jail. in a church. in fact they put it higher up... closer to... god. 

what the fuck. the fourth one. only accessible by helicopter.

who was smoking what when they decided this???

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(sigh) mmmmm id been waiting to use that patchwork quilt

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“hell of hangnails”

not as fetishy but still pretty–– actually you know what that sounds kinda fucked up. isn't that just kinda G rated torture anyway 

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wow that incredibly obvious lie deserves the terrible pursuit theme??

maybe its the last one (i hope)

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“are you the rebel hunter!!??!?!?!??”

um well no, unless the rebel hunter is a criminal. jackass.

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...cutting dirty deals with criminals, are we, sadmad?

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“haha, the fact that the third person at the scene was a wanted criminal destroys your theory that it was the rebel hunter Keera that killed the high priest!!”

...wow... gosh i was wrong... and the fact that a wanted criminal was actually at the scene... doesn’t help me at all... because once i said that one person didi it, it couldn’t possibly be someone else... oh no... i guess it was Maya who did it... for reals... not the.... wanted criminal....

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...hang on, his little power rangers dance was the defiant dragons dance? how... did nobody notice this?? sadmad really was colluding with criminals wasn’t he. gosh. what a trustworthy guy.

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phoenix: oh no!! his testimony was a lie!!

oh no! the testimony that did nothing but damage your case was a lie!!! 

??????

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sadmad: get him!

hobo ranger: (does a little hop and daintily scurries off)

sadmad: ... (takes a good five leisurely seconds to stop the background music) put everyone on high alert. i want everyone after that guy

that guy who just. skipped out of a courtroom. past hundreds of crazy people and several bailiffs. 

haha... the kooraheenes police. to quote phelous... THEY’RE THE BEST!

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“what was the point of all that, anyway?”

search me, phoenix.

“well, i cant help but feel that entire episode was an enormous waste of time”

hey capcom? hanging a lampshade on it doesn’t make it better. it just amplifies how much it sucks.

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“yes! i recognized that piece of paper because it looks exactly like the piece i have! thats covered in blood and unrecognizable!!!”

...nice

OH AND ITS THE PERFECT FIT TO COVER THE BLOODSTAIN WELL ISNT THAT JUST FUCKIN SERENDIPITOUS 

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“the ignorant lawyer has not bothered to learn out language??”

well A) he's not an international attorney, B) he was on vacation, not studying abroad, and C) fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. you’re all speaking english all the time anyway, you bunch of fuckin phoneys 

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i stg sadmad if you say putrid one more time i’ll cram a rotten egg down your pasty white gullet and show you the meaning of the word 

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“the criminal could have only escaped if the high priest helped him out, so why would he kill him?”

hey sadmad? remember that thing about using your putrid brain? yeah, doesn’t take too big a leap to realize that you might’ve just proved phoenix’s ‘idiot theory’ right. maybe the priest um... was a rebel??? who was going to do just that??? and the rebel killer offed his sorry ass?

perhaps, o foolish prosecutor, you should think before you open your rancid lips... lo, in your ignorance, you will be cast down to the hell of those who are kind of stupid....... the hell of perpetual fart smell. there you shall inhale the decomposing winds of ten thousand and one accursed mihtama, while fart fetishists gaze on in envy... 

oh wow i didnt even need to go on that spiel, he just admitted it straight up. but yeah, apparently when Lady Kee’ra impersonator kills a rebel, it’s A-OK. But when Maya kills a rebel, well, fuck, she’s a foreign bitch, execute her!!

also the way he said it seems to imply that he knew all along so uh

maybe people should start suspecting this guy. he seems to... know a lot of rebel criminals.

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every time sadmad shakes his head i wanna break his neck

man i remember being annoyed at edgeworth in the first game and wanting to hop my desk and rough him up, but never wanting to physically maim or kill him. you suck, sadmad. 

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WE GOT IT, FOLKS!! WE GOT THE ASSAULT!! IT’S UM, IT’S SUPERNATURAL FORCE ASSAULT THIS TIME. 

FUCK BIRDS AND SWORDS, I GUESS? ACTUAL MAGIC IS THE WAY TO GO?

hey sadmad; tickling? bondage? can we... keep that out of the courtroom please?

also “oh no! i can’t point my finger!!” phoenix cries, forgetting that he has two arms. i guess capcom won’t spring for more than one sprite tho haha

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“the keera we saw was the statue draped in the sacred robes!”

with a... knife sticking out, apparently. ok..?

also gosh, maya’s really fast, tiptoeing around the abbot, draping the costume just so, then tiptoeing back around? like lightning she is!!

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he just cut off his own theme song.

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“she used her fiendish tricks to fool the court room”

which didn’t work at all if you remember the beginning of this court so fuck you?

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“she sought to use the divination seance to mislead us!”

good going, pointing out an absolutely massive flaw in your country’s legal system, sadmad.

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i cant believe we had a flashback for absolutely no other reason than Sadmad to gloat. I FILE FOR A MISTRIAL ON GROUNDS OF MISUSE OF FLASHBACKS.

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please oh god just let it end i dont have enough space in my stomach for any more ulcers

i can’t stand hearing him say let it go one more time please I'm begging you

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oh no... phoenix has failed... he’s going to die... it’s really going to happen...

just get to the surprise witness or whatever already

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oh thank god. love you, headband guy

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“the dagger bears the finger prints of maya fey!”

wow. the police suck major ass at catching running people, but their finger print checking speed is second-to-none. ...either that or they waited a while before telling people about a dead body.......

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oh gosh!!! its totally maya!!! she arrived 2 years ago and so did lady keera and 

yeah no. it’s not her. 

but even if it was, kinda awkward there, sadmad? she’s um. kind of a hero to you.

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i dont get it why is everyone freaking out. i thought the keera impersonator was considered some kind of vigilante hero? why is it suddenly bad when they “find out” it’s maya? is it because she isn't kooraheenees?

I'm honestly really confused. everyone was rooting for the masked defender one moment, but now that its maya, it’s murder?? 

seriously what the fuck. like the gallery was legit going “ah!! lady keera has come back to save us from the rebels!”

and then its like “its not divine its some foreign bitch in a cloak” and now its like SERIAL KILLER. also, nice. we’ve never been allowed another day in court because there was a second charge racked up. awesome. (with the possible exception of Ron Delite, tho he was changing his charge)

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sadmad can go choke on his own braid and the gallery can lick their own hypocritical asses. i can’t believe i stayed up till 2 am to finish this section.