#ok now i am pretty sure they both indeed have something against me

[jaywritesrps]

[hauntedfoxhut]

Muzan and werewolf! reader? reader is scared of what he thinks of them when muzan first sees the form, especially since when reader is in said form, they go hunting humans like it's their last day alive-

...cuddles & comfort after the fiasco happens pls.

Muzan x werewolf!F!reader

Warnings: Blood, dead bodies 💀

It will have a bit of angst and cry but the rest will be pure fluff just as you wished

You meet Muzan a couple weeks ago, your relationship started slow, probably because of your second identity, you’re a werewolf and he’s an Oni, But the truth always show up.

But you never imagined that I would be so bad

You were walking, on a cloudy night, near the woods, because you just love the nature, until the clouds flew away showing your worst enemy, the moonlight of the full moon. You felt your blood getting hotter, your fangs started to appear, your back arched and you knew that you were hungry, very very hungry, but now there’s no turning back, your eyes got darker and you can smell the people from far, but you can’t fight against your instincts.

And then blackout, you can’t control your body, the feral instinct dominated all your brain…

Where??

Where am I?

This is??… BLOOD?🩸

Indeed it was blood, all over your body, the moon above you was the only witness, well that what you thought…

Those red eyes, black hair and charming white suite, between the trees, he witnessed the whole chainsaw, in total there were 5 bodies laying on the floor covered by their own blood.

You heard footsteps near you, and you froze, getting closer second by second, you couldn’t move, and then you felt something touching you… a hand?? Those nails, you saw them before, they’re just like Muzan’s. And even smell like Muzan, that mean he knows the truth.

“So you’re a werewolf? That’s pretty impressive, I didn’t even noticed” he said, but he sounded proud? Of what? Of me??

You fell down on your knees, when you saw him in front of you, you opened your mouth but you didn’t said a word… but instead you cried… your eyes got full of water and you started to hyperventilate, you closed your eyes to stop staring at him, but he hold your cheeks, cleaning your tears away, and we you calmed down he hugged you.

“ Don’t worry sweetheart, I am here… and I’ll always be so you don’t have to worry, I’m just like you, I understand what you’re passing through, and I can help”

When your opened your eyes he was so near to your face, making eye contact, just like he was reading your soul…

“Is that a promise?” And he answered right after,“ Yes it is ”

And he smiled showing his fangs? How could I never noticed it, but he doesn’t have a tail or fur, and tonight was a full moon, so if he’s not exactly like me… then what is he?

“ I am a demon, I also eat humans to live ” Wait he just read my mind? “ you seemed curious to know what I am and I didn’t read your mind, I swear” that phrase was followed by a smile which looks honest and calm.

“Can we leave here? I don’t want to stay in these bloody clothes anymore, I want to go home, can you go with me and spend the night?” “Surely we can my dear, and I’m pleasured that you invited me”

When you both arrived at your house, he closed to curtains to protect you from the moonlight, he prepared Hōjicha, and sat on the “couch” waiting for you.

You wore a simple yukata, the tails was gone, just like the fur and the fangs, you sat near him and he hold your hands, “no more secrets, ok?” “Ok”

After a couple hours of talk and hugs, you started to feel sleepy and yawned, and when you least realized your head was on his shoulder, and then your eyes closed.

Muzan watched you sleep for a couple of hours until he took you in his arms and took you to the futon, covering you and kissing your forehead, when he opened the door to leave your bedroom you murmured his name, as if you were calling him, and he stopped and decided to lay down with you, and when he least expected you hugged him, keeping your head near to his chest, he fell asleep with you, hearing your heartbeat 💗

I hope you liked it, i tried my best, hope you appreciate it ❤️❤️

My inbox is open for more requests❤️

[psychewritesbs]

I sent in a precious ask whining about megumi, and asking about how the characters would be spread to fight against sukuna and kenjaku, so I wanted to clarify I wasn't two anons T_T I'm just continuing from before ~

I believe yuji will play a big role in defeating kenjaku. What about you? Gojo's presence (I love you I do okay) makes thinking the how difficult given his title as strongest, but I'm wondering when yuji and kenjaku will interact with each other again and in a meaningful way. I'm not expecting immediate love family stuff and all that, but it's wild how small their interactions and dynamic is made of so little despite kenjaku being yuji's parent. As a result, I'm more excited to know how he'll handle sukuna than kenjaku 😭

Like, kenjaku's nefarious ways to birthing yuji is admirable in a loose way and I love what it means about yuji, but can we actually have them interact again please. As of right now, I don't mind who defeats kenjaku lol which is a shame for me. I know others would be upset (I understand) if his defeat was by someone other than yuji.

I wouldn't be surprised if gojo does too because though kenjaku isn't just about geto, but for gojo's motivation/pov, that's still something that has inhabited his best friends body, and then there's yuta, and I'm sure he'll fight kenjaku, but I'm unsure if that'll be his own defeat, and with that in mind, I'm curious to see how this can get done with the literal strongest who they had to seal being back in the game.

As for megumi, like I mentioned last ask about his sense of self overpowering sukuna's, but I can see yuji playing that big role with megumi playing a more active role to defeat sukuna.

Maki is a beast too, so I wonder what's going to happen with her. Also, miwa looked so ominous during her walk after the sendai colony, but I saw her standing with the group too?? I thought she would do something, but these next few chapters will tell something hopefully. Kashimo is in an interesting position as well since he wants to fight sukuna, so that's another thing. I could really see him leaving early and fighting sukuna already 🤣

Another question, but now that sukuna has megumi's ct, do you think him using it against gojo later would put him in a different light than if he didn't have it? Sukuna is pretty arrogant and confident in his strength and we still don't have 20 finger sukuna, but I always felt like him obtaining the ten shadows to add to his arsenal would make him seem like he knows he needs it to defeat gojo if he uses both his cts and that would mean he thinks hes not strong enough on his own and that doesn't seem to fit. If he fights gojo, I'm not sure gege would go the same route again with sukuna using only the 10S against gojo to make it seem like defeat by one of his students is his ending, so perhaps he may just use Shrine and if he believes he can win, then later he would use the 10S to create his world. I ask this because gojo vs sukuna is also the fated gojo vs zenin fight and what would it be without the six eyes plus 10S, so it's a mystery of how it'll all be handled.

I do think giving the antagonists, especially kenjaku prepping time will bite them in the ass.

Looool, this is how far behind I am on returning mail. HOLA! Welcome back anon 🥲.

Thanks for the Megumi love. The Megumi love is always indeed precious. There's seriously something about Megumi fans.

I believe yuji will play a big role in defeating kenjaku.

Ok but everything you wrote on this topic... yes.

let's keep nerding out under the cut.

Ehem... I actually totally forgot Kenny is Yuji's momdad.

This is a super weird tangent, but lately I saw a sign advertising 60k in exchange for becoming a surrogate mother and I considered it for a whole minute. My biggest concern with this would be getting attached to the child and then feeling a gaping hole about the kid for the rest of my life.

So I 300% agree about how significant it is that Kenny went through pregnancy for the sake of hishertheir plans. That's commitment.

I've seen what babies do to the body, now imagine Kenny having to fight sorcerers with morning sickness.

That's commitment.

As of right now, I don't mind who defeats kenjaku lol which is a shame for me. I know others would be upset (I understand) if his defeat was by someone other than yuji.

Anyways, I don't personally have any thoughts on who'd kill Kenny but there's defo a theme of patricide/matricide with Choso and Yuji. So, I wonder whether someone here is going to kill their mother/father, whether metaphorically or figuratively.

On the topic of Kenny, I love how much thought you've put into it lol. You're so right, there's several characters out for Kenny's neck rn and anyone could literally be the one to kill Kenny. My best guess is that Gege will milk this for angst purposes lol.

Ok, what about Tengen?! Tengen is sus, but not like when I used to think Hana was sus lol. Like... there's something going on there between Kenny and Tengen that we are being kept in the dark about.

miwa looked so ominous during her walk after the sendai colony

MAN. I really wanted to see Miwa not be useless. But I guess she's another victim of side character syndrome. Such a shame, really, but I guess I can't expect for every character to get the same amount of air time.

Kashimo is in an interesting position as well since he wants to fight sukuna, so that's another thing

You know what this feels like? It feels like Gege is playing chess with us. あの猫！

I had also forgotten about Kashi omg. I just wonder whether Kashi stands a chance against Sukuna. Anyways, as you say, here's another contender for killing Sukuna too.

but now that sukuna has megumi's ct, do you think him using it against gojo later would put him in a different light than if he didn't have it? Sukuna is pretty arrogant and confident in his strength and we still don't have 20 finger sukuna, but I always felt like him obtaining the ten shadows to add to his arsenal would make him seem like he knows he needs it to defeat gojo if he uses both his cts and that would mean he thinks hes not strong enough on his own and that doesn't seem to fit.

You know, this whole time I've been thinking Gojo might be the one to loose (his clothing choices aside) because he's arrogant about his abilities. But you're so right about Sukuna being arrogant af too.

That's why I loved seeing him struggle in ch 223.

Like he's realizing he has to take Gojo seriously.

Anyways, these two crazies are about to go at it and I'm looking forward to it.

But also... I don't know if I'm understanding you right, but it seems as though you're wondering whether Sukuna's interest in Megumi was because he needed 10 shadows to defeat Gojo/become the strongest?

I see what you mean.

I was also wondering whether Sukuna is a ct hoarder since he opens and closes something when he deploys ct that is different to his usual domain expansion.

I ask this because gojo vs sukuna is also the fated gojo vs zenin fight and what would it be without the six eyes plus 10S, so it's a mystery of how it'll all be handled.

This. I mean... so far Sukuna has shown us he has an uncanny ability to manipulate 10 shadows in a way that Megumi had not begun to comprehend yet. Argh... I just hope that if it comes down to it, if Gojo has to die, let it be at Megumi's hands, not Sukuna's.

I need to see Megumi save himself.

I do think giving the antagonists, especially kenjaku prepping time will bite them in the ass.

This was honestly a bit of a cop out for me with how Gege handled Gojo. Like Gojo literally just said "oh ok, sure, let's not fight rn". I hope he has a plan lol.

Thanks for the Megumi love 🥺.

[lunaticsandidiots]

ok we all know adrian is the jealous type right? like he sees someone flirting with you and he's instantly pulling you away to obliterate you right? but what would happen if he sees CHRIS flirting with you? like that's his BESTFRIEND flirting with HIS lover? how do you think he'd react? would he be even more jealous because it's chris?

man oh man do i have thoughts on this one

how adrian would react if chris flirted with you…

so its very much established that adrian is the jealous type.

when others flirt with you, he’ll whisk you away in the blink of an eye so he can remind you of why you’re with him.

(i dont think adrian would ever blame you if others tried to hit on you, he knows you cant help that. but that doesn’t stop him from using it as an excuse to fuck your brains out in the nearest semi-secluded closet or alcove he can find).

however, if it was chris who was coming onto you, it could go one of two ways.

(and for both of the outcomes, i think there’d be jealousy involved. adrian looks up to chris, and probably sees him as superior in one way or an other, so if chris tried to flirt with you, insecurities would definitely come into play.)

if their friendship was already going through a period of tension, i think adrian would have the potential to go ballistic on chris for trying it, mostly by lashing out verbally.

if he was feeling particularly hateful about it, he’d probably do tiny little extremely things to drive chris insane, like moving everything in his house 2 inches to the left, gluing all of his belongings to his desk or replacing his conditioner with mayonnaise.

and now we get to the other potential outcome.

adrian would watch as chris looked down at you, face burning bright red as he watched chris effortlessly leaning against the wall beside him, hand resting almost directly above your head to show off a massive, toned bicep.

again, half of the nausea bubbling up in adrian’s throat would be jealousy and rage.

but the other half? pure arousal.

he’d feel so conflicted, but he’d push through nonetheless, the mental image of chris pounding into you brought him too much pleasure to deny himself of the thought.

i don’t think cuckolding would be at the top of his fetish list, but due to the circumstances, it would be something that would cross his mind often until he ripped the bandaid off and asked you.

if all parties agreed, i’d think it would be wise to talk to chris beforehand for everyone’s benefit. make it clear that you love adrian, and that even though you also want this, you belong to him, not chris. (i cant help but be protective of my blorbo rn okay) .

(you could also totally use this chat to loop chris in too, telling him what adrian likes, what turns him on, so when the time came, the both of you would be able to make it the most pleasurable experience possible for adrian.)

i don’t think is nearly as kinky as he is rough, but i think once he saw you getting adrian worked up by teasing and taunting him, calming him a good boy and degrading him

‘you wanna watch me get fucked real good by someone else, baby? you’d like that, wouldn’t you? sitting there all tied up and pretty, watching me take it, not able to touch yourself, not able to do anything but squirm? i bet you’ll make a mess of yourself before i’m halfway there, won’t you sweetheart?’

chris would probably get turned on by that too i am not gonna lie to you.

and just like you’d predicted, you’d watch on from your hazy, teary, lust-hooded eyes, as best you could while chris did indeed fuck you mercilessly.

and adrian would be squirming and writhing and panting and sweating as he came ropes all over himself as the vulgar display in front of him, and he’d sit there glistening in sweat and cum as he watched you come undone around chris.

afterwards, it’d be best for everyones sake if you took extra time for aftercare, making sure that you and chris were all good of course, but then doting on adrian, showering him in love and affection, telling him how good he did for you.

and maybe later on when it was just the two of you laying in bed, you’d take a moment just to check in and make sure he knew where you were at (reassurance and clarification is the #1 way to his heart)

‘you know i’m all yours though, right dude?’

maybe he’d nod halfheartedly, or mutter out a ‘yeah’ if the big green monster had yet to fade away.

‘today was hot, but i only want to fuck you.’

‘really?’ he’d ask, eyes widened with surprise.

‘really. plus you’re way better at it than chris.’

and adrian’s not a particularly subtle or deep person, but i think he’d keep that little comment to himself, thinking of it whenever he’d begin to doubt himself in chris’ presence and just kinda puff his chest up and smirk to himself, knowing who you belong to.

[arkhamsrevenge]

You took my book.

Batman stole your favorite book and Jason helps you get it back.

“I came here for my book.” I spoke. “Not so you can introduce me to another son.” Bruce blinked, showing no emotion. Jason, the son I was now getting introduced to was leaning against one of the marble walls in a black T-shirt and jeans. His eyes were burning right through me. The weather was muggy and gross as always in Gotham. I was on my way to Starr City when I was alerted that someone had entered my home. One look at the security camera confirmed it. But it was not what I expected. Batman had broken in and stolen my copy of Mary Shelly’s Frankenstein. Why? Who knows?

“I thought since you both liked classics you could get to talking.” My eyes flickered to Jason who is just as confused as I am.

“Are you having some kind of mental breakdown?” I asked genuinely concerned.

Bruce let a small smile peak through his scowl. “No. My mental health is not in jeopardy, I sure you.” Jason finally stood up and started to walk away. I thought he was going to leave until,

“I know where he put your book. Come on.” With that he continues walking. I looked back at Bruce who had an odd look on his face. I didn’t push further and followed Jason. He took me into the BIGGEST library I’d ever seen, a house host. The shelves were almost to the ceiling. With paintings and tapestries all over, covering the walls. Golden, GOLDEN, pillars were holding this part of the manor up. Apparently, I stood in the massive wooden polished doorway, with my jaw on the floor a little too long.

“Do you want to get your book back or...?” My eyes fell on Jason, who had a peaceful look on his face. The library must do that for him.

“Yeah...is this place organized by the author's last name?” Jason nodded. “Cool. That makes this a lot easier.” I walked by Jason a little cautiously as he hadn’t taken his eyes off me since I got here. He seemed so guarded. Like I’d attack him at any minute. “Are...you, OK?” I asked. Jason’s eyes lit up in surprise at my question.

“Yeah. Just...get your book so you can go.” I opened my mouth to make a snarky remark but didn’t. I held out my hand as if calling my book and waited. The skin on my hand broke open, showing a glowing red underneath.

“Magic won’t work here.” I retracted my hand, turning it normal, turning to Jason waiting further explanation. “Zatanna's doing. Bruce asked her to. Lots of important documents are in here. Didn’t want...”

I inhaled, “Me to be able to take something. In case we had a falling out again I assume.” Jason nodded.

“Yeah. He didn’t tell me what happened though.” I nodded.

“Wouldn’t have cared if he did.” I said walking to the ‘S’ section. Jason followed a little way behind. Like he purposefully was keeping his distance. “Is there a reason you’re acting like I’m going to burn this place down? Is it because I’m a witch or a bitch?” I tried to ease the tension. At this Jason breathed out a laugh.

“Sorry. Just a little annoyed. Didn’t mean to I was take it out on you.” I waved him off.

“You aren’t just, felt the tension. ‘S’ finally, ‘Sh’ is the next bit...he put it at the very top didn’t he.” I said seeing a book resting on top the giant shelf.

“That he did. I didn’t have the heart to tell you. I can get it if you’d like. You can’t fly up there anyway.” I chuckled. “If only. I’m pretty sure he keeps a tall latter somewhere...there.” I pushed the big silver latter over to the shelf.

“Not to offend you but I still don’t think you’re 4’11 ass is going to be able to reach even with the latter.” Jason joked. At least he’s getting a little more comfortable around me.

“5’2 actually.” I shot back starting to climb. “And stop looking at my ass.” I flashed him a cheeky smile as he rolled his eyes.

“No chance you’re 5’2.” He snickered.

“Wanna consult my medical records?” I said looking down at him. Jason didn’t say anything back, just watched me continue up. Finally, I reached the top of the bookshelf. My book was indeed there. I reached for it, able to grab the corner and inch it over to me. “Screw you. I got it.” I called down to Jason showing him my book now in my hands. He stood there shaking his head. I flipped through it to make sure it was indeed my copy. The notes I’d written on the mergers were all there and the bullet points I wrote on the pathological narcissism of the doctor were still in the back of the book. They were. I was satisfied that this was my copy. I held onto the railing and started to make my way back down, when I heard a metal squeak. The bad kind. I stayed still trying to assess where the damage was. Another squeak rang out, a screw had come loose, the left side of the latter had gone tumbling down and me along with it. Before I knew it, I was falling, fast. Gravity’s a bitch. I finally started to process what was happening about halfway down. This will break my neck...shit and Alfred is gonna be pissed about cleaning up the blood. I waited to hit the ground then. I landed in someone's arms. Jason’s arms. He had a panicked look on his face. My heart pounded in my ears as the adrenaline continued to run through me. My left arm rested around his neck while his right arm supported my back, the other under my legs. Every inch of me felt like it was electrified. After at least 10 minutes of heavy breathing and us just looking at each other I spoke.

“Nice catch.” It came out as a whisper. Jason opened his mouth to respond when Bruce, Tim and Dick came running in.

“Is everyone....” Bruce started before seeing his son holding me. Bridal style. Oh boy.

Dick, always the sarcastic started to snicker with Tim.

“Are we interrupting?” I felt my cheeks turning red, suddenly becoming hyper aware of where Jason’s arms were and how close he was to me. Jason, clearly feeling the same, lowered me down and looked away, trying to hide the pink tint his cheeks were starting to get.

“We’re fine...the latter broke when I was trying to get my book. Jason...caught me.” I explained going to pick up my book. “Bonus points, books not damaged.” I brushed off the dust that accumulated on it from the fall. “I’ll uh...be going now. I gotta meet Barry in Starr City...like two hours ago.” Dick and Tim gestured as if to say, “right this way m’lady” I gave them the middle finger. Looking up Dick burst out laughing at something behind me and Tim held him up from falling to his feet. I turned to see Jason, red as a tomato now. Trying to hide his embarrassment.

“Shut up Dick before I make you.” Jason said trying to sound threatening but ended up making Dick laugh harder.

“I’m-I’m sorry Little Wing bu-but you’re BRIGHT RED! YOU MATCH YOUR HELMET!” Tim then started to laugh along with Dick. I on the other hand had to get going. I rolled my eyes at the laughing Batboys and turned to Bruce.

“Don’t take my shit again...please.” I smiled lightly. Bruce nodded, looking at his sons all wrestling each other now in a big pile. Acting like kids, for once. I saw a ghost of a smile on his face. “Have a nice day, Bruce. And Jason?” I said a bit louder. The boys stopped wrestling for a second. “Thanks.” I smiled genuinely and started to walk away. I turned the corner, seeing Steph propped up against the wall.

“So are you just not going to tell them that Zatanna’s spell doesn’t work on you or did you just want to get closer to the Prince of Gotham?” She said smirking. I smiled not saying a word before rising my hand opening a portal and walking through to Starr City.

[sugrbugz]

𝙰𝚐𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚘𝚗 ~ 𝙺𝚞𝚛𝚘𝚘 𝚃𝚎𝚝𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚘𝚞 ♥︎

a business man kuroo x femboy!male reader concept!

TYSM FOR 100 FOLLOWERS <3

ok females calm down i know everyone’s horny for kuroo, which is why i’ll be posting a female version of this too! i’m just a male who is indeed horny for kuroo soooo….i see u men

CW: heavy degradation..like HEAVY, oral, anal, pet play, bdsm, a little bit of somno (literally just touches your ass while ur sleeping that’s it), face fucking, dycraphilia, lotsa swearing hehe, hate fucking essentially.

was it his fault? not entirely. kuroo had been at the end of his rope before he even walked in the front door. having to deal with corporate executives who thought they were actually useful all day was a chore in itself.

kuroo loved his job, loved his company, loved the money even, but most importantly he loved you. he loved everything about you. he loved how you’d come running down the large staircase when he came home, ready to receive a plethora of hugs and kisses from you. you were the only part of today he was looking forward to.

so when he came home to an empty house, not one with the sounds of your music or your feet rushing down the hall to greet him. he was honestly disappointed. “baby?” he called out loud enough, looking around the main floor a bit before going upstairs. now the sight before him made his heart squeeze, you curled up in the blankets of the bed with your head buried into his pillow? he wanted to cry.

that’s when he noticed it, your clothes. kuroo is as bisexual as it gets, he’s quite literally the poster child. however, in your mlm relationship it was very apparent the type of boys he was into, femboys. with a slight gulp he pulled the blanket back just a bit, careful not to wake you. the large pink night shirt that cling to your body with the literal pair of panties nearly made him pass out.

“even when you’re sleeping you aim to please me..” he mumbled running his fingers down your back before cupping your ass cheek with one hand. no movement from you yet. you two had talks about kinks before, it wasn’t uncharted territory and sure enough he remembered what he was doing right now was okay, you’d given him consent multiple times to do it but even then he still wanted fresh consent. maybe you fell asleep because you weren’t feeling good or were having a bad day and needed to sleep it off.

he lightly shook you, “hun..” he whispered leaning down to kiss your cheek softly. smiling when you whined softly. “you okay babe..? anything wrong?” he asked softly. you opened one eye, making him smile wide. “mhm…’m okay” you mumbled sitting up slightly, your shirt falling off your shoulder slightly. “that’s good..now…i have a favour to ask, kitten”

after the petname you knew what that favour was going to be. “anything for you.” you smiled softly, shifting your position so you were sitting on your knees in front of him. you knew what came next and so did he.

“sucha good boy” he praised softly, hands finding the collar around your throat. “you didn’t take it off since last night? that’s cute..maybe i’ll get you something similar that you can wear in public?” he hummed.

you knew better than to speak unless he was genuinely asking you a question but you still gave him a gently nod to show your interest.

“what a good pet…to be completely honest with you, i’ve had a terrible fucking day. you know how i get when i’m not having a good day don’t you angel?” he asked, a hint of cockiness to his tone.

“i’ll be back. by the time i am you know what i expect to see.” with that he kissed your forehead and left the room. you didn’t want to test him today, sometimes you’d be a brat but today was not that day.

you quickly stripped down, clothes folded neatly placed on the side table so they were accessible for aftercare. your hands found your lap, pressing your hands in between your legs to hide the inevitable boned that came with him using you like he wanted to. surely he wouldn’t know if you gave yourself a little attention right? it was just so hard to stop yourself..it would feel too good.

snaking one hand down you grab onto your own length, gently stroking it. you shiver a bit at the feeling, both your cold hand and the sexiness of know that if you’re caught kuroo would make your life a living hell for a couple of hours, was thrilling.

when you and kuroo started getting into bdsm he put rules in place, ones that you needed to follow in the bed and even in regular life. one of the big ones? always ask your master permission to play. it was almost like you could hear him saying it back in your head, the guilt was starting to set in but it was just too late. right as you went to stop your movements, the door opened again, leaving you and kuroo in a very long intense gaze.

“well..what do we have here love? is my good boy breaking the rules?” he simply walked over, tossing the lube among other things he brought to the side chair near the bed. “n-no i didn’t do anything!” you whined in protest.

kuroo slowly leaned down, hand gently cupping your face, “i don’t fucking believe you.” he whispered before bringing the hand on your cheek back a bit to give it a smack then quickly taking the stinging skin back in his hand. “one thing i hate more than a whore who doesn’t fucking listen is a liar.” he spits.

he could quite literally get off on the shocked expression on your face currently, “now let’s try this again. did you break a rule?” he asked, eyes literally begging you to try and lie again. “yes master..” you sighed in defeat, you knew the punishment would be bad.

“do you know what happens to naughty boys that don’t listen and lie? do you kitten?” he let go of your face now, walking over to some of the things he brought up to the room. “they get punished” you replied quickly, not wanting to give him any other reason to punish you harder. “they do…you’re so smart baby..” he came back over, shoving you flat down on your back before using a flogger over your pretty pink tip.

“if only you weren’t a needy dumb slut.” he laughed striking again. you were left there to just wiggle and take it, whines and gasps leaving your mouth like a gospel. “i just wanted to come home and have a good time with my pretty kitty..and of course your stupid cock had to ruin it.” he sighed, peering down at you slightly just to see if you were still okay but judging by your face you loved it.

“i can’t wait any fucking more. get on your hands and knees, and you better arch that fucking back” he grumbled leaning over to grab the lube. this is how you knew kuroo was stressed or upset. even if he was punishing you he always took his time giving you what you wanted but now it was straight to the point.

“god look at that beautiful ass..too bad it’s attached to a cumdump like you, it’s going to be fucking tortured today i promise you that much boy.” he hissed giving it a rough slap. you flinch forward from the sting, a loud whine leaving your mouth. that only makes him do it again, harder this time. so hard it’s already formed a raised little imprint of his hand.

with every smack you jolt forward causing your cock to rut against the blankets, there was just so many sensations at once that you couldn’t help it when you came untouched, load seeping out onto the bed.

you’re fucked.

“did you just fucking cum?” he laughs loudly, one more extremely hard slap coming down, basking in the way you scream and whine about being sensitive. “you’re fucking pathetic. is that all you need? the bare fucking minimum?” he cussed at you. “you better fucking apologize” he grunts out.

“i-i’m so sorry! ‘m sorry master i-i didn’t mean too! it just feels soo good!” you practically sobbed, babbling like an idiot about how much you love him and that you’ll do better. he loved breaking you like this but he knew it was also emotionally taxing. “what do i always tell you baby?” his voice was a bit softer now, wiping a stray tear that did slip from your eye.

“t-this is just for fun..you don’t mean anything you say” you sniffled looking up at him with those cute little eyes of yours. “that’s right. good boy” he praised, “colour??” he asked immediately after. “green” you smile giving him a little thumbs up.

with your confirmation kuroo quickly grabbed you by the small amount of hair you had, pressing your face against the tent in his pants. “good..then it’s only fair i get to cum too yeah?” he smirked, stroking your hair gently.

“yes sir you do..i promise i’ll do good for you!” you ramble quickly, tiny hands working on his dress pants buttons. he watched you with hooded lids, just admiring how quickly you were trying to please him. “maybe your punishment will end if you’re good enough, but remember kitty it won’t be easy” he smirked knowing exactly what he was going to do.

you didn’t reply, just gave him a tiny nod. if you had to work for it then you would. you pull his cock out of his pants, kitten licking at the top a few times before licking a long strip from his balls all the way back up to the tip. to say you had a oral fixation, especially when it came to kuroos cock, was an understatement.

“that’s it…g-good boy-fuck” he praised, hands roughly gripping at your hair. holding you in place when you tried to take most of his length into your mouth, what didn’t fit your hands fumbled with. however kuroo was determined to make it fit.

kuroo roughly pulled your head down onto him, basking in the sound of you choking and gagging on his cock, “awh what’s the matter? bit off more than you can chew??” he smirked fucking your face with aggression, hips snapping up flush against your cheeks.

the tears that rolled down your cheeks made him unbelievably horny that he couldn’t stop himself, grunts and moans leaving him mouth while he used yours as a person fuck toy. you knew he was close when his perfect rhythm faltered a little and his grip on you was even tighter. to show him just how bad you wanted it, your hands found his balls, rolling and playing with them.

“goddd~you want this l-load so bad huh? hm? nggh! fuckk! you want it? yeah? fucking taking it stupid slut.” he sounded so unbelievably hot you can’t even help the bit of precum now leaking from your sensitive tip. soon after his statements you felt a warm sensation flooding down your throat, almost choking and coughing slightly since there was so much.

kuroo was still letting out loud moans of exctasy, ending with a soft hum he pulled his cock out of your mouth. the second you were freed you let out a gasp for air and a little bit of a cough but kuroo didn’t care. he grabbed your chin, opening your mouth with his other hand to make sure not even a drop of his cum went to waste. “good kitty..you took my cock so well…maybe you do need a reward?” he hummed, laughing deeply when you nodded quickly.

“face down ass up pretty boy.” he stated, having no problem jerking his still sensitive cock back up into a full erection. you did exactly as he asked before feeling a cold piece of metal against your back, you knew it well. the lead that attached to your collar. after it was clicked into place there were a few kisses up your back before you heard his raspy breath in your ear, “if you cum again without my permission this ass is going to be so fucking bruised and sore you won’t be sitting for months.” he whispered softly before biting the tip of your ear.

your breath caught in your throat but you nodded quickly, “yes sir..i’ll be so good i just really need to feel you..” you whine out, having to force your hips not to rut against the bed. “it’s cute when you’re so unbelievably pathetic for me” he smirked before gently rubbing the tip of his cock against your hole. “you’re clenching around nothing..so pretty..”

you choked out a tiny sob from just how needy you were, he always did this. he liked to break you down before even touching you, you loved it. “a stupid whore” he laughed loudly before giving you another harsh smack. with that he lubed his cock up, groaning a bit from how it felt.

with that he pushed inside, moaning when he bottomed out. he had this plan where he was going to make you cockwarm him for a bit just to tease you but the second he thought about all the stupid shit he had to deal with today? his hips snapped up and aggressively into you making you scream out but he wasn’t listening.

he was stuck in his own head, mentally cussing out everyone he worked with as he fucked all his anger out into his pretty kitty. “a-ah! da-mm! daaddyy!” you whine out nearly snapping him back to reality fully. “what? can’t handle it? is it too much for you?” he spat quickly, his pace not letting up. “everyone’s-nn-fuckin’ disappointing me today! i’m not taking it from you kitten.” he seethed, basking in the sound the bed made as it smacked off the wall.

“daddy! fuckk! ‘s soo goodd” he listened to the way you moaned out, his cock twitching so hard inside you that you could feel it. “yeah? you like it when i fuck your stupid boy pussy” he grinned knowing the way that made your heart skip a beat. “come on then, prove it. show me how much you love this fucking cock, stupid bitch” he smirked smacking your seriously irritated ass cheeks.

that sparked something inside of you, your hips throwing themselves back onto his cock. your moans so loud for him it sounded like screams. “p-please!” you managed to scream out between the loud babbling that left your mouth. “please what kitty?” he grunted, doing his best to focus on you and the squeezing your ass that was practically trying to milk him.

“plea-hhng! please c-cum daddy please!” you screamed, thank fuck he didn’t have neighbours. he smirked and shoved you down so your head was pressed again the mattress, holding your head there he let out a loud fucking moan before completely stilling. you could feel it shooting out in ropes, it felt so good that you came instantly and once again untouched.

“hmm that was cute~” he hummed almost immediately back to his normal self. “colour my love?” he asked gently rubbing your back, wondering if there was possibility to go again. “red” you murmur making him nod before slowly slipping out of you. “are you hurt? was it too much?” he pouted softly, gently rolling you onto your back to keep eye contact with you.

when you couldn’t reply he gently scooped you up and carried you into the bathroom, “it’s okay baby..kuroos got ya’”

[delicrieux]

—MAKE YOU SAY “OH” EXTRAS: TINDER

extra meaning non-canonical occurrence; can be placed anywhere in the “make you say oh” timeline after couple (cha. 14) and before the final “oh”. 

pairing—corpse husband x f!reader warnings—tinder profiles, tw: men, swearing.  word count—2.6k. format— written. ─── ❥ req by nonnie​:  y/n makes a youtube vid/live stream where she's just swiping through her tinder acc and corpse literally blocks her lmao

author’s note—akldsljfs this was such a funny idea i could not not write it lmao

ultimate masterlist. myso masterlist

You have pulled the biggest brain move by setting up both a facecam and a screen recorder on your phone. All is beautifully displayed and visible during the stream. Your fanbase is particularly intrigued on what exactly are you planning on doing today, seeing as your tweet of “strea” had been a bit vague, if not downright ominous. No emojis. No elaboration. You couldn’t even be bothered to finish the word. Truly, a mystery. Everyone tuned in and are currently waiting with bated breath.

A few of your fans must sense upcoming doom because the overall mood in the chat turns from optimistically intrigued to...evil. It’s an entity all on it’s own now, clawing at you through the screen with various renditions of laughter and devil emojis. A few eggplants thrown in there for good measure, accompanied, naturally, by the scandalous water drops. At first the common consensus is that you’re biting the bullet and going through your camera roll on stream. Definitely an idea worth considering, though you frankly don’t know what lies at the start of the 11k photograph journey, and you are afraid to check in public. Could be a harmless meme, could be a salacious pic you had saved of an OF star. It’s really a gamble. Either way, you would definitely get banned. You might still get banned. Why do you insist on doing shit like this?

Because it’s funny. Because you’re kinda stupid. Because it’s just so absolutely laughably easy to do.

A smile quirks your lips, and while it is not explicitly smug, the look in your eyes sure is, “Greetings,” You utter lowly, dimming the lights--the budget for this stream! Ugh, you went all out, “my children.”

mother i crave violence

sensing evil energy rn!!

i do not claim the energy in this video for myself or anyone else watching this 💖💖

^with peace and love shut the fuck up

“I know y’all lowkey hoes-” Upon your words the chat splits into two: one side eagerly agrees (even shares a few OF accounts! How helpful, supporting small businesses!), whilst the other feverishly insists on innocence. You make a face stuck somewhere between offended and bewildered, “Now c'mon now-I know you. I know you all. We’re the same, don’t-what was that?”

You try to scroll back to the comment but it’s loss in the sea of incoming messages, “I swear to God I just saw-”

Corpse_Husband: i love late night streams it’s not like i have anything better to do.

“COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORPSE!!!!” 

rip headphone users

i cant feel my face when im with you by the weeknd but instead of face its my fucking ears

yall think full vol on pc is better?my parents woke up 😭😭😭😭

To think he’s spending his last waking moments for today with watching you (he probably still would have anyway, because you do not posses an ounce of shame or self-control and pester him relentlessly)! It makes your heart sing, and suddenly, a traitorous, fun hating idea barges it’s way through the crowd of incoherent buzzing and states: don’t do this. For some reason it also has the voice of Rae. As if that would work in guilt-tripping you- Rae never succeed, and her fictitious rendition in mind won’t fare much better either.

Still, you thought about it. That must count for something. Corpse will understand, won’t he? Why don’t you want to upset it in the first place? Men look so funny when they lose their shit, like hello, don’t you have anything better to do? But the image of Corpse just sitting there, hurt, distraught, leaving you on seen because he’s in his sad boy hours leaves a sour taste in your mouth. 

queen rly went from  🥺😊 to 😕 u ok bbgirl?

Corpse_Husband: no pouts cutie

akjdjoeijdfse cUTIE??? deadass boutta r.i.p.

Well that succeeded in eliminating everything from mind, doubts included. If this was an anime, the scenery would shift into something roseate, with flowers and bubbles and sparkles all around you along with a halo or two. Alas, not an anime, rather reality. The led-lights, however, seemingly possessing a will of their own, slowly turn from deep violet to pink. You smile brightly, like the absolute dumbass you are, and you are met with a ray of heart and blushing emojis. You are just so cute, a real cutie! Still in your disguise adorable state, you swipe your finger on your phone screen, the grin never leaving your lips.

There, among the plethora of apps, nestled sits a red square with a white fire plastered on it. The delicate calligraphy on the bottom reads: TINDER.

The mood changes once again- you’re giving the roaches emotional instability by how quickly everything flips over- and the chat spams eggplants vigorously; some, of course, bravely fight against the thirst.

nooooooo i thought y/n is gonna stream in a god honoring way!!!

^pack it up girl defined

“So, Charlie and I-” You note a few awfully curious comments and squint, “-yes, we talk a lot. Charlie is a really good friend of mine. We’re best friends. Brothers. Sisters. Cousins. The whole fucking family tree-no, that sounds weird. Delete. Anyway, Charlie, being the absolute fucker he is, said, hey, you know what would be funny? And I was like, nooo, what would be funny, Charlie? And he says to me, he says, says, making fun of men on Tinder. And if y’all need any more proof that Charlie and I are platonic soulmates, then dunno, my children, my roaches, I dunno-I dunno what more to give you.”

You can’t be bothered reading the comments, there’s too damn many. You also need to save your reading comprehension for the actual bios. It has a time limit, that darn thing. 

“Okay, so I made a profile earlier, but I hadn’t swiped on anyone yet-” Despite the fact, Tinder helpfully informs you that already 99+ people have swiped right on you, “So, this is me,” You show the pictures you have of yourself, and damn, not to be a conceited narcissist, but you look really good. Like if you saw yourself on Tinder, you’d super like instantly. “Uhm, so, my bio-my bio says: let’s sauce in the tub together, ya dig? splishy splashy, giggle giggle.” 

i cant believe we are witnessing y/n trying to form a coherent sentence live 

shes trying give her time

ya dig??? y not capeesh

what scene from the godfather is this lol?

“My anthem, is,” You laugh, covering your lips with your hand, “Corpsie, this is form you-” Proudly, you show that indeed, Corpse’s E-GIRLS ARE RUINING MY FUCKING LIFE is listed as your anthem on Spotify, “Hehe.” Yes, you say that aloud.

Corpse_Husband: you’re killing me Corpse_Husband: thanks baby Corpse_Husband: now delete tinder ❤︎

You ignore his last quip, deciding it’s finally time to get this show on the road, “Right, let’s do this shit. I’m not actually going to swipe on any guys that look, uh, decent? Yuck, can’t believe I just said that, uhm, because I-because I feel like some actually deserve a chance with someone? I don’t wanna get anyone’s hopes up, as I am currently in a long distance relationship with Chrollo. So I’m just gonna swipe on, like, frat boy assholes. Because I don’t care if I hurt their feelings. Quite frankly I don’t think they possess them in the first place.”

The chat voices their agreements. With the ground rules set, you, giddy, click on the first profile.

Does Tinder know what you’re doing, your plan? The FBI agent watching you through your phone must be working overtime, bless his heart. They must, because the the first guy to meet you is named Jason, and there he is, blond hair and blue eyes, holding up a fish the size of his torso. Marginally adequate in looks, pretty good muscles. A solid 7 bordering on 8. He’s the same age as you, 15 miles away, and he studies at some college you don’t care enough to look up. Bio reads:

I like to drive fast. Fishing is my passion, but if you can’t catch me by the ocean, you’ll catch me catching waves, bro! Love a good gym date. You do squats, and I’ll keep a close eye to make sure you’re doing it correctly ;) You probably saw me at a party. Leader of the The Phi Kappa Psi. I’m a Gemini, if that matters lol.

You, of course, read it aloud, dramatically; provide some constructive criticism-he seems nice, but he’s a Gemini, so naturally, you can’t trust him at all! Also, that gym date session leaves little to be desired. With your rant done, you swipe right, and shocker! (not), it’s an instant match.

“Okie, I still wanna swipe of some profiles, so I’ll see what he’ll text later-” For a second you wonder the legalities of this stream, but you’re having too much fun to think of it further, “guys, I won't get sued, right?”

NOW she considers it

well....

if you do, we’ll kickstart your lawyer dw <3

Onto the next profile. Kevin, 25, is seen fixing his car- or, you assume he’s mid-fixing it, you don’t really know why else he’d hold a wrench and be covered in oil. He’s shirtless, and the caveman part of your brain echoes something closely resembling AWOOOGA!, but...but!...blonde hair, blue eyes. You pout again, “I don’t...I don’t really like blond boys, ya know? With the blue eyes and all, it’s just not my thing, uhm, unless it’s like-like...Armin from Attack on Titan. Else I don’t care.”

Onto the bio:

You have to treat a car like you treat a woman: go on long rides, take the lead, but most importantly, keep her oiled up 😜 

“What the fuck did I just read?”

The chat is equally confused. You swipe right anyway- another match. Too easy.

The stream continues without incident for a solid thirty minutes- all of your matches, expect a few that genuinely looked like normal dudes that really couldn’t write a decent bio to save their lives, had been blond hair blue eyed gym rats with ranging forms of misogyny. Some opened with asking for nudes out right, some asked about your day first before asking for nudes. You prefer the former. Straight to the point! You admire the gall. 

But then, down the forty-five minute mark a profile popped up that made you still by your phone, your smile dying as your eyes bulged. Dear God. Lord in heaven. Who is this demonspiit lookalike and why is he so fucking hot? The neck tats, the skateboard, the clothes- holy shit, you gotta close your mouth before some drool dribbles out.

No bio, just his name, Tyler, and that he’s 23.

“He boutta be 23 in me.” You mutter, swiping right with lightning speed.

WHAT DID SHE SAYYYYY?????????

tyler is y/ns karma for relentlessly mocking that one guy that had a whole ass list on what his “female” partner should be

^he deserved it and also tyler seems like a typical fuckboi y/n grow a braincell

look at mom 🥺 her eyes are sparkling

It wasn’t a match right away. You somehow expected as much, but it still upset you. Simp behavior, pathetic. The stream continued bravely, and when Tyler messaged you a simple “yo” you totally didn’t sequel. You didn’t manage to text him back on stream: texting all those guys that you didn’t really find all that attractive was easy, but this...You’re a sucker for a man who radiates red flag energy. His whole profile is a red flag. He might just be a red flag himself.

What can you do? Suddenly becoming color blind is not easy. Once the stream ends, you unmatch with everyone expect Tyler. He you chat with for a bit, but a sudden craving for different company makes you abandon him, too. You don’t feel too heartbroken for him- you’re certain there’s already too many girls in his dms. You wish them luck.

Happily, you delete Tinder. You go to Twitter, notice you’re trending again- look at you go! Queen shit- and as you compose a thank you tweet, something strange happens. You go to text Corpse, but when you click on his profile you grow cold.

YOU’RE BLOCKED. You can’t follow or see @/Corpse_Husband ‘s Tweets. 

...Pardon? You hop onto Instragram and-also blocked. Seriously? And you thought you’re one petty bitch. Corpse is seriously prissy about everything. Damn, if he didn’t like your stream, he could’ve just said so. Didn’t need to, like, block you from his internet existence. So not cool.

You try texting him but no text go through. Well how will you let him know you deleted Tinder just like he asked? You relieve your frustrations by punching your pillow a few times. Later, you apologize to her, you didn’t mean to hurt her, it’s not her, it’s you. Fuck, 5 minutes of exile and you’re already loosing your mind.

“Raeeeeeeeeeeee!” You whine loudly. It’s roughly 2am now, but you don’t care. You’re too heartbroken to care. There’s a thump from her room, but nothing else, “Raeeeeeeeee!!!” You wail, wallowing in self-pity on your bed. You hear a very loud, very annoyed sigh from her room, followed by angry marching. Your door is abruptly thrown open, and in the dim, colorful light you see her scowl.

“What?” She grits.

“Can you please tell Corpse to unblock me from everything?”

“What did you do now?”

“I made fun of men on Tinder.”

She pauses, “...That doesn’t sound so bad.” She surmises, voice laced with suspicion, “What else?”

“...There was one really hot guy that I kinda sorta talked to after--”

“Y/n.”

“-But I totally deleted Tinder and honestly he was pretty boring, so, like, uhm, please?”

She sighs, the servery of which implies she is holding the weight of the world on her shoulders, and instantly you know that you won. She taps away at her phone, “You owe me one.” She states, and before you can reply, she exits your room and slams the door behind her.

Grinning, you text his phone again. The message goes through, oh gosh, you’re so relieved you feel like crying. This has been, officially, the worst five minutes of your life.

You Y DID U BLOCK ME LOSER!!! MAJOR LOSER ALERT!! I DELETED EVERYTHING IT WAS A JOKE r u still mad at me? y u always mad at me i never do anything:(

my husband You’re my baby, how do you think I’ll react when I see you publicly simping for some asshole on Tinder?

Oh no, he used the words, he delivered the killing blow. You’re finished. Your heart can’t take such a workout. 

Not that you would ever admit it to him, though!

You hehe ur jellyyyy u always dis jealous hehe?

my husband Not jealous.

Yeah, you might not be the brightest tool in the shed, but even you know that’s a lie. You send him an array of kissy emojis that he doesn’t have the decency to reply to. Then, completely unprompted and dead serious, you send him a simple voice memo, saying: “You really have nothing to worry about, you know? You’re my favorite, Corpsie.”

He responds via text, reiterating that he’s not fucking jealous and that he just doesn’t like when you show such outward interest in anyone but it’s not like he cares or anything. It’s just really, like, weeeeird to see his baby simping for another man like that totally ruins the whole dynamic!!! It was only natural that he should block you on every social media platform, including his personal number (which, like, was completely necessary! Doesn’t matter that his viewers can’t see it, it’s gotta be super believable!), and inform his followers of that, because it’s all a joke, like, for the dynamic, that Youtube grind, you know? Ya dig? No personal feelings were involved at all. He totally wasn’t upset that you found someone else cute, no way!

my husband I’m not jealous. Lol.

You ik u repeated tht like 50 times  u trynna convince me or??? lmao

my husband No comment. ...You don’t actually talk to anyone else like we’re talking, right?

You no one else calls me their baby if thts wat ur wondering at least not to my knowledge lol im all urs

my husband That makes me very happy to hear:)

Yeah, it makes you very happy, too.

hope you liked it!! xx

[korasonata]

I had someone last time ask me about time stamps, so all of these from this point out will have the time stamp at the top of each set of quotes. I am currently in the process of retrieving the time stamps for the previous 5 posts, and will link an updated version when I have retrieved them all.

Link to the video is here: https://m.twitch.tv/videos/1149389841

Favourite moments of Joe and Cleo model streams part 6!

(I am very sorry I tried very hard to make this not as long as it is. There will probably be another extended cut post because there was just SO much happening in this stream)

—

00:00:57

Cleo: Welcome to the stream. Mine and/or Joes. Or, both.

Joe: Yay!

Cleo: I suppose that’s what the “and” means. In that statement. That would make sense. Glue pot’s ready—

Joe: It makes sense to me.

Cleo: …that makes me even more nervous that it makes sense to you, Joe. Not gonna lie.

—

00:16:34

Joe: So, anyway, last night at dinner, uh, like I— I had put this interview on while I was cooking and I kinda left it on as my daughter sat down for dinner and I was like “hey, this is an interview with this very famous journalist from about 50 years ago. Uh, he’s got a really interesting voice and a really interesting cadence, and I wanna kind of listen to it so I can— maybe copy it as like a joke in one of my videos.” And my daughter listens to it for about a— a minute—

Cleo: And then says “now that’s— is that you?”

Joe: *laughing* She just turns to me and she’s like “my friend…her parents got her…did you know they make crayon applesauce now? It says crayola. It tastes. Like they’ve blended a brown crayon. And sprinkled it on top.”

Cleo: That sounds grim.

Joe (prideful laughing): And it just kind of matches the cadence while also talking about something terrible to ingest?*laughing* And I just start cracking up because like— *laughing continues* she gets it! And she’s just like “why are you laughing?” Because you just— you nailed it! You nailed the pauses, you— you nailed the subject matter, like this is— this is just great!! And she’s like “no! This is a real thing! This crayon applesauce is terrible!” And I’m just laughing and laughing and she’s like trying to explain why it’s not good, and I’m like “I understand why it’s not good, but—“

Cleo (reading chat): “Joe’s daughter is awesome.” I think you’re probably correct. Joe’s daughter is indeed awesome.

Joe: Yeah, I’m very very happy with my daughter. (Reading chat) What was for dinner? Well not crayola applesauce!

—

Cleo (in response to someone complimenting her 3rd Life videos): Awe! Thank you joytobake, that’s really nice! I am…always pleased when people like my personality. Because I’m never sure that people should, you know?

Joe: Yeah, that’s— that’s what we were talking about— I think before we started streaming, was like, Cleo really gets me, and that’s a huge red flag.

Cleo: That’s a— yeah. As a human being. Understanding Joe - massive red flag. Huge. This is a danger. To everybody. And particularly Joe.

Joe: It’s the terror of being truly known.

—

00:47:08

Joe: Up until this point I didn’t show the instructions, but now I feel like I have to.

Cleo: Because otherwise people are going to judge your competency?

Joe: Yeah! They’re gonna go “ok. Any idiot can figure out how these pieces go together” but if you look at these instructions, that’s not true. I’m a spectacular idiot, and I have no idea what I’m doing with these.

Cleo: I mean. I want— I want to confirm. Yes. Spectacular.

Joe: Yes. Thank you Cleo.

Cleo: *snicker* You’re welcome Joe. I always like to insult the people I care about the most.

Joe (quietly): I know…I appreciate it.

Cleo (Watching chat): I’m waiting for Cam to confirm that.

(Cam in chat: She insults me SO MUCH, she called me a gibbon last night…)

—

00:59:42

Joe: *reading tips*

Cleo (reading chat): “you can’t stop Joe when he’s on a role.” This is true.

Joe (not paying attention): *still reading tips*

Cleo: I mean you can, you just have to go: Joe. Joe. JOE. And then he stops sometimes.

Joe (quietly, but with emphasis): WHAAAAAAAAAAT??!?

Cleo: I’M DOING A THING!

—

01:00:46

Joe (reading tips): “This is an encouragement donation for more of you singing in the future.” Ooo, I think Cleo would like that because the future is not now.

—

01:02:23

Cleo (genuine singing): Ground control to major Tom…

Joe: *listening in awe*

Cleo: …That’s…pretty much all I know…

Joe: Oh, I was gonna let you keep going, I— I wanted to hear more.

Cleo: Oh no. That’s pretty much all I know.

Joe: But yeah. Hypothermic haddoc writes (singing) “tell my wife I love her very much!” …I was waiting for you to jump in with the (singing) “she knoooooows!”

Cleo: Again. Again, I don’t know the song very well.

Joe: Oh. And here I am sitting in my tin can—

—

01:47:54

Cleo: *leaves to get a drink*

Joe: While you’re getting your drink I guess I’ll provide some musical entertainment.

SILENCE

Joe: …I don’t have anything prepared. So, let’s see…do we have any birthdays? *laughing* if it’s anybody’s birthday I’ll sing to you while Cleo’s gone.

Cleo: I’m back.

Joe: Oh ok. Well, sorry birthday boys. And girls.

Cleo: feel free to sing to people. I’m sure people want that.

Joe: no…well, I was gonna do it while you were away cause I need to get up and get my drink as soon as you’re back.

Cleo: Oh, go and get a drink and I will sing happy birthday—

Joe: So I’m gonna go get my drink, I’ll be right back.

Cleo: —to people who have chosen to spend their birthday…here…I’m not judging, uh, but— (upbeat singing) Happy Birthday to you! You smell like a zoo! (Talking) …uh, etcetera etcetera… (Singing) I forgot how this song goes! Nevermind it sucks to be you! *blows a raspberry*

—

01:49:09

Cleo: I mean it’s Cams birthday on Saturday, and I will sing to Cam on his birthday. His birthday is not today. I mean he probably wants me to not sing to him on his birthday, to be fair—

[Cam: Please don’t sing to me]

Cleo: —but you know, I might do it anyway. Cause it’s obnoxious. And I will laugh. (Reading chat) “Happy Birthday! Here’s some genocide! Please don’t sing to me…” *laughing* I won’t sing to you if you don’t want me to, Honey.

[Cam: Not happy birthday at least lol]

Cleo: I might torture you in other ways though.

—

01:50:55

Cleo: Hiiiiii Jooooooe.

Joe: Hello! Joe Hiws hewe! I am back fwom my dwink bweak!

Cleo: …what is that voice?

Joe (in a Kermit the Frog/Swedish Chef/Yoda hybrid of an accent): I feewl wike it’s fwom home star wunner or something, I don’t know! It’s almost Kermit THe Fwog Hewe, but not quITe!

*Cleo laughing*

It’s a little— (Normal voice) I dunno. I still had some of my drink in my throat, so I was like— I didn’t wanna like accidentally cough it out on the microphone as soon as I started talking. So I was just like (weird voice continues) I’ll do thIS vOIce

*Squealing giggling from Cleo*

(Same iteration of previous accent now blended somehow with the voice of Goofy from Micky Mouse) It’ll keep my mOUth in a shape that if I start— me coughing up a dwink it’ll just go into the chEEks on EIther sIde. It’s a natuwal, uh bARRier against, uh, hydration escapism! Uh yuh!!

Cleo: *giggles* Ok Joe. Ok.

Joe: *high pitched laughing* I don’t know Cleo! I’m just gonna keep making noises until people give me money! It’s jus— it’s how I pay rent.

Cleo: *laughing* Making noises until people give you— ahhhh…..

Joe: Yeah

Cleo: — actually…..yeah. Yeah. Yeah…Um (reading chat) “it’s drunk Kermit” *wheezing*

Joe (drunk Kermit The Frog voice): It’s 5:00 somewhere!

Cleo: *laughing* thanks for this. I needed— I needed this moment of— of— whatever this was.

—

01:53:54

Joe: So my daughter said the most Wednesday Adams thing to me the other day—

Cleo: Oh no

Joe: Except she didn’t do the deadpan delivery. She was very upbeat about this. So apparently “UP” has, on Dinsey+ a series of shorts about the old man and the dog. Right? And they’re called something like “a Dougs Life” cause Doug is the name of the dog

Cleo: yeah.

Joe: and she goes “oh! And it’s short! Like a dogs lifespan!”

SILENCE

Cleo: …Your…kid is very much your kid, you know that right?

Joe (proud dad): I know right?!

—

01:58:20

Cleo: I mean…you’d kill it at the Met Galla. Not gonna lie.

Joe (excited): Oh my god— I wanna get one of those Manuel suits that has like all the rhinestones and the flowers on it? Um, but, you know, like, those are very expensive.

Cleo: We live with what we can afford. Maybe someone can make you a Diamond encrusted suit that you can wear on camera. And have all the sparkles as green.

Joe (very excited): Oh my gosh— actually— so—

02:20:45

Joe: Meanwhile in my Discord everyone’s posting what they describe as “eye searingly beautiful” lime green wedding dresses. For my next wedding. Um—

Cleo: *snicker* is that what you’re wearing for your next wedding?

Joe: you know, honestly at this point I don’t wanna make any assumptions about anything.

Cleo: *cackling*

—

02:31:07

(This is context for the next one)

Cleo (reading chat): “some people have too much time on their hands” I mean, I personally would not drive 8 hours to see— um…

Joe: …me?

Cleo: I dunno, I might drive 8 hours to see you.

Joe: I offered to drive 8 hours to see you when you were coming to Disney and you said no, so I’m gonna assume that you would not drive 8 hours to see me.

Cleo: I mean, I— li— the key word there was “might”. I wou— I would have to have my mini frea— well I was freaked out at that point. When you offered, and and I was just like “oh god no.” Because, you know, social anxiety is a thing.

Joe: Mhm. I’ve heard of that.

Cleo: Yeah. And I do not do well particularly meeting people for the first time, even people I’ve known for a while. I go very very quiet and umm…I think it’s worse actually with people that I’ve known for a while? Um, online, um…because— cause my brain goes “well you’re gonna make a s—your, your— your going to do something and say something stupid. You going— they’re gonna hate you in real life” um…so, yeah. My brain absolutely freaked out at that moment.

—

02:34:12

Cleo: But, you know, like I say, I get hate mail on the regular, it’s fine. I mean part of that is daring to be a woman on the Internet, but only part. The other part is the fact that I’m also an awful human being. So, you know.

SILENCE

Cleo: …the silence isn’t doing— the silence doesn’t do you— do me any favours Joe.

Joe: Well, you know, I didn’t wanna talk over you when you’re sharing your insecurities.

Cleo: yeah….

Joe: That seems rude.

Cleo: I mean—

Joe: So I wanted to make sure you were done.

Cleo: no no no no, that’s fine. I’m always done Joe.

Joe: And nOW I can actually tell you how I really feel.

Cleo: No, please don’t. Not onl— no. That will— that will make me even more uncomfortable.

Joe (upbeat singing): The praise train is on its way!! Choo choo!!

Cleo: Noooooooooooooooooo!! Nooo!!

Joe: For Cleo it’s her day!! Choo choo!!

Cleo: *noises of distress*

Joe: Cleo is really great!! Choo choo!! Choo choo!!

Cleo: *distressful crying*

Joe: She’s not merely ok!! She doesn’t have to be the best at talking to people for the first time!! Cause they’ll love her anyway!! And sometimes they’ll even rhyyyme!! Yay for Cleo!!

Cleo: *physically going through a full body cringe* noooo

Joe: See, it would have been rude if I did that in the middle of your thing.

Cleo: *sob laughing*

Joe: That would not have been socially acceptable.

Cleo (through tears): I’m not even sure it was socially acceptable now.

Joe: WHY NOT?!

Cleo: (sobbing and laughing simultaneously) I hate you so much.

—

02:38:05

Cleo (reading chat): “We all need a Joe in our life, who sings a theme song for us when we’re talking ourselves down” I’m not sure you do.

Joe: Yeah, that wasn’t really a theme song? Like, if I was gonna do a theme song for Cleo—

Cleo (with immense dread): Oh no…no…no…

—

02:43:07

Joe: I’d just like to point out (very obnoxiously high pitched voice) That this is Cleo’s average person voice, which means that 50% of people have an even higher pitched voice!

Cleo: …You know, I can’t actually stab Joe through the Internet. And I’ve always been upset about that.

—

02:53:36

Joe (with all the enthusiasm of a 16 year old girl gossiping at a slumber party): Ooo I wanna ask Cleo about giiiiiirls!!!

Cleo: Ask me about girls! I’m— I’m happy for you to ask me about girls.

Joe: Ok, so, do you— do you feel comfortable saying what your specific, uh, type of woman is? I’m— I’m curious about that.

Cleo: Um, it’s— it’s nerdy girls? Specifically. Umm…not too, um…you know, the kind of running, climbing, you know— sort of— person. You know, it’s— it’s the sort of— it’s the sort of— action girl kinda thing. I kinda like that type. That’s sort of my type.

Joe: Mhm. Yeah, like—

Cleo: Why, what’s your type of girl?

Joe: Well, uh, usually it’s somebody that is— very anti authority— un— un— dissatisfied with the status quo. So usually more punk, or that sort of thing.

Cleo: Yeah. That’s— that’s— that sort of plays into the action girl sort of thing as well. Yeah I get that. So yeah.

Joe: yeah, umm, you— yeah so I don’t know. Um— so not necessarily, uh, as focused on the athleticism element there, but I know like—

Cleo: Well it’s not really athleticism, it’s— it’s more— it’s more—

Joe: —in terms of like, um, hiking, cause like, uh, you know in college there’s like a climbing and camping club or whatever—

Cleo: Oh yeah, it’s not that sort of person. It’s— it’s more, um…getting out and having a go at things. Like, you know, not— not being afraid to—

Joe: Adventurous

Cleo: Yeah! Adventurous! That’s the word!

—

Cleo (whispering): I don’t know where this bit goes! *gasp* it goes over there!

Joe (whispering): You can do it!

Cleo: I can do it! I believe in me!

Joe: You’ll find a place to glue it! It doesn’t necessarily have to be the right place!

Cleo: I know!

Joe: You’re equally valid regardless!

Cleo: Thanks Joe!

Joe: You’re welcome!

Cleo: It’s appreciated!

[wrenhyperfixates]

We Make a Pretty Good Team

Pairing: Loki x reader Summary: It’s game night at the Avengers Tower, and you find the perfect partner in Loki. Warnings: ‘tis but fluff A/N: Just another self-indulgent, fluffy story. Hope you enjoy :)

Tag List: @lucywrites02​​ @frostedgiant​​ @lunarmoon8​​ @twhiddlestonsstuff​​ @lokistan​​ @lowkeyorlokificrecs​​ @gaitwae​​ @whatafuckingdumbass​​ @castiels-majestic-wings​​ @kozkaboi​​ @cozy-the-overlord​​ @birdgirl90​​ @myraiswack​​

Disclaimer: Gif not mine 

“First Saturday of the month. You know what that means,” Tony hollered to the Avengers scattered about the Tower.

“Yes!” Thor boomed. “Be prepared to lose.”

“Funny,” Clint laughed with a roll of his eyes. “I was just about to say the same thing to you.”

“What is happening?” you asked, somewhat bewildered, as the heroes came into the room. “What’s significant about Saturday?”

“Oh my gosh, that’s right. You just missed the last one. Every first Saturday of the month we have a game night,” Nat explained.

You’d been part of the team for just under a month, having officially joined on a Sunday. So, it was true that you’d yet to experience their apparently traditional game night. It sounded like a great deal of fun, though, especially because the Avengers had become your second family in the short time you’d known them. Well, you’d actually known Nat and Clint for years, since you all worked for SHIELD. In fact, they were a huge part of the reason you were an Avenger now. A few months ago there was a particularly dangerous crime ring, and they’d specifically requested you as backup. You’d clicked with everyone immediately and, numerous transfer papers later, here you were.

“Sounds exciting!” you told them. “What are we playing first?”

“Well actually,” Bruce said kind of sheepishly, “it’s not that I want you to sit out, but they’re all team games, and we don’t have an even number of people.”

“So we have a team of three,” Nat said, as if it were obvious.

“No way. That’s unfair,” Tony argued.

You bit your lip, feeling like maybe you were intruding on something you shouldn’t be a part of. It was their thing, after all, and perhaps there was simply no room for a newcomer. As they continued to bicker about whether one larger team mattered or not, you considered just slipping away. That’s when you noticed that there was someone missing.

“What about Loki?” you said. “He would make the numbers even.”

Much to your surprise, everyone burst out laughing. You nervously ran your sweaty palms on the legs of your pants and let out a small laugh, though you weren’t quite sure at what. Once their cackling died down, you dared to ask what was so funny.

“My brother never attends these games nights,” Thor informed you. “He isn’t one for group activities, as I’m sure you’ve noticed.”

“Well, have you ever invited him?”

“Once or twice,” Tony said. “Listen, if you want to try to make a social butterfly out of Reindeer Games, be my guest. In the meantime, we’ll work out a feasible way for us all to play.”

You rolled your eyes and scoffed a little, standing up to go find Loki. It was honestly ridiculous that they still treated him the way they did. Sure, he likes to be alone sometimes, but that doesn’t mean he likes being lonely. Not that he’d ever actually admitted to you that he was, but you knew. It was blatantly obvious in the way he sent longing glances toward the rest of the team when you gathered together. You always made sure to ask him over, an invitation he usually accepted. Everyone else had laughed the first time you’d done that, too. They’d only ever asked him a few times, and it was right when he was new and still so lost, so alone, so afraid. Why they took that to just be his permanent disposition, you didn’t know. Regardless of how insensitive they were to his situation, your inclusivity had brought Loki out of his shell a bit, and a friendship had blossomed between you.

A short walk later, you reached his door. You stretched out a hand, but hesitated to knock. Doubt gnawed at the back of your mind. Maybe he truly was not a fan of board games, and then you’d be interrupting his night. After all, he must have a tradition of his own if this happens every first Saturday. Still, you knew that was usually not the case, and steeled yourself against the uncertainty.

“Hello, my little mortal,” he greeted you, opening the door. “Is everything alright?”

“No.”

“What is it? Are you ill? Hurt?” he questioned, jumping into action and shepherding you to his couch.

“No, nothing like that,” you laughed, though you were touched by his concern. “It’s just that it’s game night, and we don’t have an even number of people.”

“Oh? And I suppose that you are asking me to join,” he mused as you nodded. “I am not usually invited, and I am notorious spoiled sport, just ask Thor.”

“Well, people say a lot of things about you, and they’re usually not true.” He shrugged his shoulders. “You don’t have to play if you really don’t want to, but will you? Please. For me?”

“For you, my little mortal, anything. After all, how can I resist those puppy dog eyes?”

You giggled and led the way out of his room, ignoring the thumping of your heart when his hand accidentally brushed yours. Nat and Tony were still bickering about the teams when you arrived, but were quickly stunned into silence when they saw Loki.

“Brother! Good to see you’ve decided to join,” Thor greeted, breaking the somewhat awkward silence. “Shall we begin then?”

First up was Cranium, and you could tell that everyone else was divided into their usual teams: Tony and Bruce, Clint and Nat, Thor and Steve. You rubbed your hands in excitement, ready for some friendly competition.

“Yes!” you shouted a while later, after you and Loki answered the final question right. “We win!”

Everyone else’s jaw hung open, shocked by how serious of a competitor you were. Not to say you were mean-spirited or gloated or anything, but it was obvious you took game night very seriously. Loki was a little surprised too, but he relished in the infectious energy of your feisty spirit. Not to mention he absolutely loved to be on the winning team.

“Congratulations, guys,” Steve said. “Don’t expect to get as lucky in the next game, though.”

The next game, apparently, was charades, which you and Loki absolutely dominated again. The two of you worked as a well-oiled machine, guessing the simple ones like sewing and the more obscure ones like whale watching with ease. Loki was also surprisingly knowledgeable about Midgardian movies and literature. The two of you high fived, having just edged out the competition.

“Wow, good job guys,” Nat congratulated. “Tony and Bruce usually win that one.”

“Way to rub it in,” Tony groaned, flopping back on the couch.

You could tell a part of him wanted to accuse Loki of cheating but, having no real evidence and not wanting to start a fight, restrained himself. Instead, he contented himself with just mumbling how much of an outrage it was. You, however, were on cloud nine.

As the next game was set up, Loki pulled you onto his lap, instilled with confidence after his latest wins. Of course, if anyone were to ask, he would just say he was saving room on the couch. It would have, though, been a lie.

“Ready for a clean sweep, my little mortal?” he whispered, his breath surprising cold on your ear.

“Bring it on!” you whispered back with a wink.

The last game of the night was Pictionary, and by now everyone knew you and Loki were the team to beat. Unfortunately for them, you got this win, too. The Avengers let out a collective sigh as you shouted a victorious whoop and hugged Loki.

“Good game everyone,” you said, starting to help clean up.

“What are you doing, my little mortal?” Loki questioned, half joking. “Do you not know the losers have to clean up?”

“Not sure that’s actually a rule, Rock of Ages,” Tony grumbled.

“Fine, I’ll help,” he replied, placing a singular piece back in the box. “There. Now it is time for our victory lap.”

Then he scooped you up bridal style using his superhuman strength and began running you around the Tower in his arms, both laughing the whole time. He finally brought you to a stop on the balcony of his room.

“You’re ridiculous, you know that right?” you said, still chuckling.

“Perhaps. But we deserved that after an excellent showing.”

“I guess so. As much as it pains me to admit it, we should probably go easy on them next time. We’ll just win one a night, ok?”

“That’s my little mortal,” he happily sighed, wrapping his arms around you. “Always looking out for others. Always looking out for me. Thank you for inviting me along tonight.”

“No problem. It was a lot of fun. We make a pretty good team.”

“Indeed.”

A comfortable silence settled between you, and you rested against Loki, whose arms were still wrapped around you. He felt more relaxed and happy than he had in a while. He knew he’d ask you out someday, but right now he was still too shy, this friendship still too new. One day he would, though, and he couldn’t wait to get there and to every day after.

[hercleverboy]

the waiting room

spencer reid x fem!reader

summary ↠ the three times Y/N waited for spencer, and the one time he waited for her. (based off of this blurb)

category ↠ angst

warnings/includes ↠ mentions of death as a result of potential illness, spencer’s headaches, mri scans, swearing,  indefinite ending. 

word count ↠ 2.9k

dedicating this one to two of the literal loves of my life, @voidsfilm + @ellesgreenaway ♡

“What is stronger than the human heart, which shatters over and over and still lives.” — Rupi Kaur

Spencer had always hated hospitals.

He found it so conflicting, how a place could hold so much hope for life and promise for the future, and yet also hold so much heartbreak and despair and agony.

The strong disinfectant smell wasn’t his favourite thing, either. He hated how the bright lights always irritated his eyes, and how the hallways all just looked the same, so bleak and lifeless.

Most of all, he hated the waiting room. 

The navy-blue carpet that lined the floors, wooden chairs that were always, without fail, extremely uncomfortable to sit in. The way that nurses and doctors would walk past the room, eyes full of pity and sorrow. With his job, he’d seen more waiting rooms than he would’ve liked. He spent more time than he wanted to in hospitals, talking to victims’ families, and even sometimes having to witness them receive such heartbreaking news. On one or two occasions, he’d even had to be the bearer of bad news himself, the one who had to tell expectant family that their loved one was gone. It only added to the list of reasons why he despised hospitals.

Then there was the other side of the coin. He took frequent trips to the hospital, but unfortunately more oftenly as a patient than an FBI agent. He wouldn’t say he was reckless, but he didn’t exactly put much value on his life. Or at least, he never used to. He figured it was because he was the only one on the team without a family to come home to, without people who were dependent on him. And so, if it came down to it, he would willing take off his Kevlar vest and put down his weapon while talking down a gun-wielding unsub. Of course, he’d get the third degree from Hotch later, but he could live with that. And then he met Y/N, and he realised that now he had someone counting on him, someone waiting for him to come back home to them, he couldn’t afford to be so careless in the field.

Though sometimes, despite Spencer’s best attempts, things still went wrong. Y/N had seen the inside of the hospital waiting room more than most, often because she’d get called by one of his team mates to alert her that he’d been injured in the field. And without him ever asking, she’d drop everything to be there for him, even if it was his own stupidity that had landed him in those situations. 

The first time was after he’d been shot in the knee. Y/N had been midway through her workday when she’d received a call from JJ telling her that Spencer had been injured. She knew that it was only a leg wound, that he would be absolutely fine, but that didn’t stop her from being worried. She’d been sat in the waiting room, waiting anxiously for a nurse to come by and update her. 

As soon as she got the all clear to see him, she’d breathed out a sigh of relief and made her way to his room,  catching his attention as soon as she entered.

He gave her a tight-lipped smile, grimacing slightly at the pain shooting through his leg. “Hi.” 

She chuckled at that, moving to stand at his bedside. “Hi baby, how are you feeling?” 

“I’m ok.” He smiled, reaching up to tightly grasp one of her hands in his. “You didn’t have to come all the way down here, you know.” 

“Oh, stop.” She mumbled with a smile. “You know how much I worry about you.” 

He grinned at that, the warm feeling that he always got when he was with her spreading through him. He used the grip he had on her hand to pull her down to him, so his lips could meet hers in a sweet kiss. “Hotch has demanded I take some time off to rest, or whatever.” He murmured against her lips. “So, I’m all yours.” 

“Hmm, and what you mean by that is that you need someone to take care of you at home for a few days?” 

“Well, I did get shot in the leg, you know. Taking down the bad guy...” He gestured to his bandaged-up knee, a pout on his pretty pink lips. 

She let out a laugh at that, amused. “Alright, Superman. Let’s get you home, shall we?” 

The next time Y/N found herself in the hospital waiting room was a year later, when Spencer had been suffering from painful, unexplainable headaches. 

Initially, Spencer hadn’t wanted her to attend his MRI scan appointment, but it didn’t take much convincing for her to assure him that she wanted to be there for him. He’d held her hand in a vice-like grip on the drive to the hospital, only letting go when the nurse called his name to tell him they were ready for him. She’d kissed the back of his hand before he’d left, a whispered promise leaving her lips before he went, “I’ll be right here waiting.”

She looked around the empty waiting room, took note of its greying walls and stained carpet, and how awfully uncomfortable the chairs were. She thought of anything and everything that could distract her from the way she was feeling at that moment- knowing how scared her boyfriend was that there was something was wrong with him. 

Spencer came back to the waiting room an hour later, both relieved to see that his girl was indeed still waiting for him but frustrated with what little the doctor had told him. 

“Hey!” Y/N sat up straighter, putting on a smile for the sake of her boyfriend. “How’d it go?” 

Spencer just shook his head. “He says there’s nothing physically wrong with me. He suggested I should consider that it’s something more mental, but he’s wrong- he’s wrong, Y/N.” He sat down in the chair next to her, seeking comfort in her arms as he whimpered into the crook of her neck. “I’m not- I’m not crazy, am I?” 

And the truth was, she didn’t know. She was so afraid for him, worried that he was sick, dying, perhaps of something that the doctors hadn’t detected yet. It terrified her. Her hands ran up and down the expanse of his back, attempting to soothe his weeps the best that she could. Spencer grabbed fistfuls of the back of her shirt and breathed in the scent of her hair as deeply as he could to try and ground himself.

“I’m scared, Y/N.” 

That broke her heart to hear, but all she could do was nod in understanding, hoping her words would offer him some form of comfort. “I know, I know. We’ll figure this out, ok? Everything is going to be alright.” 

The next time Y/N inside of a waiting room was on what she could only refer to as the worst night of her life.

There were no words that could encompass the plethora of emotions she went through when she’d received a phone call from JJ, “Spencer has been shot. It’s- It’s pretty bad, Y/N. You need to come quickly.” 

When she got to the waiting room, she saw JJ and Alex sat opposite one another, a worry that made Y/N’s stomach sink on both their faces. She hurried towards them, tears blurring her vision. “Have you had any updates? Is he ok?” 

JJ looked up, shaking her head sadly. 

“What happened?” Y/N asked, her voice wavering. 

“He got shot in the neck. He pushed me out of the way.” Alex sighed, as though she was still in disbelief that he’d done that to save her. 

Y/N stared ahead in shock, dropping down into the seat beside Alex. Of course, of course, Spencer would risk his life to protect Alex. Y/N knew how fond he was of his colleague, how he idolised her, saw her as a sort of mother figure, even. 

Eventually JJ got called back to work, with Alex insisting that she’d stay with Y/N and wait for Spencer to wake. 

Y/N was so sick and fucking tired of the waiting room. Before, she hadn’t minded it, it had even bought a sense of comfort to her- because she was in a hospital, where they saved lives. But now? The familiar walls and dull navy-blue carpet made her feel nauseous. Not knowing whether her boyfriend was going to live or die was incomparable to any other time she’d found herself waiting in the same four walls. She was feeling everything and nothing all at once, she wanted to cry and scream, curse the universe for once again hurting a man that had done nothing in his life but protect others. Hell, part of her even wanted to laugh- laugh at the absurdity of the situation. If he died, - god, if he died - the world would’ve robbed him of a lifetime with her, the chance to live the life that he deserved.

She barely registered that Alex had left her side to bring her a coffee until she sat back down beside her. Y/N looked over at her, giving her a small smile as she gratefully accepted the coffee. 

Y/N brought the cup to her lips, relishing in how the hot liquid brought her a sense of warmth, and she wondered if she’d ever feel Spencer’s warmth again. She sucked in a shaky breath, speaking the first words she’d said in all the hours they’d been waiting. “You know he wants kids?” 

Alex looked over at her, sad smile tugging at her lips. “I do.” 

Y/N nodded, sniffing. “He’d be a phenomenal father.” 

“He would.” 

Y/N let out a small cry, trying desperately to hold herself together. “What if I never get the chance to give him that, Alex?” She cried, body finally giving in to the painful ache that consumed her entire being. 

Alex placed an arm around her, allowing the younger woman to lean on her shoulder for support. “You’ll get the chance. Spencer is strong, he’ll pull through.”

And sure enough, Alex had been right. When Y/N had been told he was awake, she couldn’t describe the relief that flooded her. After meeting Penelope in the hallway and being given a much-needed hug, she took a few deep breaths before walking into Spencer’s room. When her eyes landed on him, she felt the tears start to well again. She had to remind herself that despite the bandage on his neck and the numerous machines hooked up to him, he was there, and he was alive. 

She came towards him with the best smile she could muster, and he looked up at her with a drowsy smile.

“Hi.” She whispered, standing beside his bed. 

He grinned up at her, reaching out for her hand just like he always did. “Hi.” 

She squeezed his hand gently, reminding herself again that he was ok, though she couldn’t prevent the tears that began to tremble down her cheeks. 

Spencer’s heart throbbed at the sight, and he allowed himself to imagine the pain she must’ve been through, having to wait for hours to see if he was alive. He wouldn’t wish that on anyone, especially not the woman he loved more than anything else. “It’s alright, sweet girl. I’m alright.” He promised, wishing more than anything that he could pull her into his arms and soothe her, though the pain in his neck prevented him from doing so. 

“I could’ve lost you.” She whimpered, her other hand coming out to delicately trace the side of his face. 

“I’m right here.” He gave her hand three squeezes just to emphasise his point. 

She leaned forward, pressing a light kiss to his forehead. “You can’t ever scare me like that again.” 

Spencer chuckled lowly, nodding. “Yes ma’am.” 

“Promise me?” 

And though it was a promise they both knew he couldn’t keep, he granted her the reassurance that she craved. 

“I promise.” 

Y/N knew that wasn’t the last time she’d be sat in the waiting room, scared and anxious and hoping that the love of her life was ok. She knew there would always be a ‘next time’, no matter how many self-serving promises she asked Spencer to make. What she didn’t plan for, was that the next time she saw the inside of a hospital, it would be her fighting for her life. 

It had been a slow day at work for Spencer, with him managing to complete a majority of his withstanding paperwork. He sat at his desk, focused on how he twirled his pen between his fingertips, willing the clock to move faster so he could go back home when his phone rang, Y/N’s name flashing across the screen. 

He answered eagerly, though all eagerness was wiped away when it wasn’t her voice on the other end of the line. 

“Hi there, I’m looking for a Dr Spencer Reid?” 

Spencer’s mind raced, and he swallowed thickly before squeaking out an answer. “That’s me.” 

“I’m calling on behalf of Y/N Y/L/N, you’re registered as her emergency contact.” 

“Is she ok?” He croaked out, begging and pleading internally that all the worst-case scenario’s running through his head wouldn’t come to fruition. 

“She was involved in a severe road collision. You’re going to want to come down here-”

Everything past that was drowned out by the sound of Spencer’s heart beating quicker, so loudly he could hear it. He hung up, gathering his things together as quickly as he could and rushing toward the doors of the bullpen- running directly into one Derek Morgan. 

“Woah, easy there, kid. You got somewhere to be?” He joked at first, but erased all hints of a smile from his face when he saw the tears filling the younger man’s eyes. “What’s going on? Talk to me.” 

Spencer couldn’t form a sentence, only managing to splutter out a few barely strung together words. “It’s Y/N, she’s- she’s been in an a-accident and I need, I have to get to her.” 

Morgan’s eyes widened, nodding in understanding. “Alright, ok. You’re in no condition to be driving, let me take you.” 

Spencer wasn’t about to argue, already making his way toward the elevator. 

*

Spencer had always hated hospitals. 

But he’d also decided that he really fucking hated the waiting room. 

The doctors didn’t have any updates for him, no matter how many times he asked. So, he’d been forced to sit in that damned room and wait. 

He thought of how cruel the concept of the waiting room was. Waiting for either good or bad news, waiting to hear the words that would either fill him with relief or dread, signify the start of his life or the end. How cruel was it that people had to sit and wait, with the weight of the world on their shoulders and just hope their loved one was ok? 

With the first hour brought Spencer’s upset, tears trembling down rosy cheeks and whimpered words of disbelief that he could lose the woman he loved. He’d sat in the uncomfortable blue chair with his head in his hands as sobs wrecked through his body, with Morgan sat next to him, a comforting hand on his shoulder. 

The second hour brought with it a slither of hope, as a doctor came out to update them. Though it wasn’t good nor bad news, just that Y/N was still in surgery and was expected to be so for the next few hours. Spencer had again buried his head in his hands, his thoughts racing. The rest of the team arrived, joining the sombre atmosphere of the waiting room. 

The third hour saw Spencer grow agitated, angry with himself for not being with her, for not protecting her, despite how many times the team attempted to reassure him that there was nothing he could’ve done differently. They brought him cups of coffee with gentle reassurances, empty promises that Y/N would be fine, that she would pull through, but how could they possibly know that? 

In the fourth hour, Spencer sat staring blankly at the wall. He reminded himself of the future he’d dreamt of time and time again, and how he couldn’t imagine himself having that life with anyone else but her. He recalled the location of the velvet purple box he’d bought just a few months prior, hidden amongst pairs of his mismatched socks in the second drawer of his nightstand. What if he never got the chance to propose? To give her the life that he’d promised her time and time again when it was 3am and he was holding the love his life as close to his chest as he could get her. After all he’d done, the years of his life he’d given to helping to protect those who couldn’t protect themselves, this was the thanks he got? What a sick twist of fate that was. 

By the fifth hour, he was exhausted. His eyes drooped but he fought to keep them open, choosing to ignore the pitiful looks JJ shot him when she saw him fighting sleep. He would wait for her, just like all the times she had waited for him. He recognised how the way that he felt must’ve been how Y/N had felt after he’d been shot the year before, and the thought almost made him sick. He ran over all the possible outcomes in his head, allowing his eyes to close for a single moment as he mentally calculated the statistical probabilities of each outcome. He despised how helpless he felt. For a man whose job was to help others in need, he’d never been a position before where he didn’t have the answer, where he couldn’t come up with a solution. His heart ached as the realisation that he could very well lose her settled over him, the statistic he’d calculated of her survival being a number that was way too low for Spencer’s liking. 

For the moment, he had no choice but to wait. 

It was all he could do. 

*

permanent taglist: @beyonces-breastmilk​ @pinkdiamond1016​ @itsmyblogandillreblogifiwantto​ @thelovelyrose​ @averyhotchner​ @cynbx​ @calm-and-doctor​ @reidyoulikeabook​ @katexrichardson​ @jemimah-b99​ @muffin-cup​ @shadyladyperfection​ @rigatonireid​ @amoeebaa​ @mggsprettygirl​  @alltooreid​ @s1utformgg @awritingtree

spencer reid taglist: @reidtome

[sirisuorionblack]

Hiya! I love your writing so much 💜 May I pretty please request a sirius x reader imagine where they have passed the honeymoon phase of their relationship and now struggles with opening up to each other emotionally. Happy fluffy ending where they promise to love, protect and comfort each other?

I hope you have a lovely time wherever you are! Much love 💜

Until the very end

Sirius Black x Fem!Reader

Warning - Cursing.

Summary - Realising you are in love is tough and expressing it is quite difficult. But for Sirius Black, it happened in a short period of time and in the place where he would have never expected to confess his undying love yet he promises.

A/N Ahhhh THANK YOU SOO MUCH! I had fun writing this although I cried a bit in the end, curse my emotional personality. I had to take some time to understand how you struggle with expressing all the emotions in being in a relationship cause I have never done that so this is practically very much based on imagination and theory. Hope you like it!

Sirius Black. Your boyfriend of two months and within the short span of time he proved you what an amazing gentleman he could be all the while make you feel loved and cherished. It was beautiful being in his arms, kissing or not. Or just stand next to him, his arm wrapped around your shoulder, pulling you to his side as he casually chatted made you feel things that you couldn’t describe in words. All you knew was you wanted to be with him till the end of your life, all the worries and hurt long forgotten with just simple grins on your face.

And Sirius was in no good condition. He was over the moon after the first month of your relationship, he knew the moment you tightly held him in your arms while a tear rolled down his eyes that you were the one. The one who would make him feel loved, safe, happy, like the luckiest human alive. The one who acted as his best friend, a sibling, a parent and…a partner for the rest of his life. He craved to just simply old you in his arms after a tiring day rather than kissing feverishly. He wanted to mutter that it would all be alright and he is right there but gulped all the words of comfort in fear.

Sirius desperately hoped he could gather the courage to at least blurt those three words. How stupid of him to think he would get the courage in two months while he had waited two years to ask you out. He always heaved a huge sigh when he thought of it and today was no different.

“Look at that,” James said, staring at Sirius who had occupied the couch in front of the fire in the comfort of his common room. Sirius sat up straight from his hunched position, rubbing his hand and pried his eyes away from the dancing fires to his best friend’s warm brown eyes, “No one is attached to your hips. What a surprise!”

Sirius resorted to a small chuckle and stared at the fireplace again. James scrunched his eyebrows, the Sirius he knew, never, no matter what could remain silent for this long…unless he was asleep.

“You alright?” He asked, taking a seat next to him, “Are you guys fighting or something?”

The fright in his eyes scared James as Sirius hurriedly said, “No, no. Merlin, no,”

“Then what's wrong?” James asked, getting comfortable so that he was looking at Sirius with his full attention. The fire danced maliciously in his grey eyes. James would never not admire how striking they look but he never would admit it to Sirius.

“I…I want to tell her,” he said, and gulped, “I wanna tell her that, but, I just dunno how!”

“Tell her what?” James asked, confused.

Sirius looked at him weirdly and shook his head, “No wonder how Lily had accepted your date offers yet,”

“Hey!” James whacked him over the head. The two boys laughed later falling into a comfortable silence.

“Do you love her?” James asked, this time both of their eyes on the shimmering fire.

“I-I don’t think so,” Sirius sighed lightly, “It's not exactly love, you know. That would be an understatement,”

James whipped his head to look at him. “Not like the usual definition of love. That “I would die for you” and all that shit. It's more like I would live with you, hold you, protect you kinda…thing. It's like, I want to be with her for every second of my life and…do things, have things I never knew I needed or wanted for me,”

“Oh, Merlin,” James breathed, “Is this how I talk?”

Sirius looked at him for a second before laughing and pushing him jokingly, “Piss off,”

James chuckled, “I say you tell her. I am sure she would think the same way,”

Sirius looked at him, “You think so?”

“Nope. I know so,” he said, with that little smirk that Sirius had grown to find mild comfort in.

“How do I tell her then?” Sirius asked.

“Are you seriously asking me? And look what I did there? Sirius-ly,” He said.

“James,” Sirius looked at him warningly.

“Look, if it is anyone, I should be the last person for you to ask advice on how to tell a girl you love her,” James said, “I have been struggling on my own for years, mate!”

“Then should I ask Remus?”

“He would ask you to get a book for her and say “I fucking love you”,” James said.

“Right, then Peter?”

“Nope!”

”Uh, Marlene?”

“She herself is hanging on thin ice,”

“Alright then who!?”

James thought of it for a second before he said, “Think of it yourself you know, come up with a nice, new amazing idea!”

Sirius rolled his eyes.

“Where is Sirius?” you asked Remus the next morning in the Gryffindor common room.

“That shit is asleep like a log upstairs,” He mumbled.

You blinked, “Mr Potter, you gotta do something about your ward’s extensive cursing,”

James laughed as Remus rolled his eyes, “Of course, Mrs Black, I will ground him until he stops cursing.”

Your eyes widened at the name he called you. Mrs Black. You knew he wasn’t talking about Walburga Black but the feel of being Sirius Black’s was something new and exciting and beautiful. Something you loved and feared at the same time.

“Shut up, Mr Evans,” You said, wiping the smirk off his face and making him blush.

“Good Godric,” Remus shook his head looking at the two of you, “Just please for Merlin’s sake get going,”

You chuckled and walked upstairs, the sound of James saying Mrs Black echoed in your head. What would happen next? In a few days would he find you boring and leave? Will you confess…the actual feelings? What would happen then? When will it happen? The questions in your head were overwhelming and now you just needed to see Sirius.

When you reached the boys’ dormitory, you gently pushed the doors open and slowly stepped in trying to not make much noise.

Sirius laid asleep on his four-poster. His hair a wild mess on the pillow, his face turned towards the door, a small smile on his face. You tip-toed to his bed and crouched to your knees to look at him. He looked so peaceful and indeed sleeping like a log.

He looked divine. Relaxed yet gorgeous. You knew how much he impacted your life when you pushed away the hair on his face gently and leaned down to press your lips to his forehead. While you moved to pull the blanket over him properly, you felt him grab your hand with his eyes closed.

Holding your breath, you stood still for a second before realising he was still deeply asleep. He mumbled something strangely similar to “love you, puppy”, before shifting to lay straight on his back, his head inclined to the opposite side but the clutch on your hand never losing its grip. He held your hand as would at any other time.

You didn’t want to disturb him and you had no reason to either. You tried to gently pry his fingers but it was of no use as he woke up with a start. Looking around wildly before spotting you. He laid back on the bed, with his eyes wide open and looking at you accusingly but with a smile nevertheless.

“Sorry,” you muttered.

“It's OK, puppy,” he said, in his hoarse morning voice that you wished to hear for every day of your life, “C’mere,”

You took your place in his arms, snuggling closer to him. Sirius gently kissed your forehead, “Something’s wrong, my darling?”

“No,” you lied, moving closer to him. The warmth radiating off him was extremely comforting, those three words sitting on the tip of your tongue ready to slip out of your mouth any minute.

“Are you sure?” Sirius asked, shifting you in his arms so that the two of you were face to face. You nodded lightly.

With the mere months, Sirius had honestly get to know you rather than hiding behind and taking discreet looks, if he learnt anything it would be to identify every action of yours - he would immediately know if you were hiding something from him and usually Sirius wouldn’t pry the information but today was a different case. The hidden distress in your eyes was somehow blatantly visible to him, and he wanted that to disappear once and for all.

“Love, you know it’s okay to tell me anything, right?” he asked, looking intently into your eyes.

You let out a sigh, you could never hide anything from this boy, he knew every move of yours for your own good. You buried your head into his shoulder, his grey eyes too bright for you to look into.

“What is gonna happen next?” you mumbled. Sirius’ face took a look of confusion as he thought of it. What is gonna happen next?

“I dunno, get ready for breakfast?” He resorted to the more silly answer just to hear your laugh.

You pulled away to look at him, a beautiful smile on your face, “Not that, idiot. I meant like what do we next?”

Sirius leaned up to kiss your forehead, “Whatever my princess wants,”

“I love you,” You blurted without giving it a second thought. With wide eyes, you watched as Sirius' jaw dropped, a look of utter disbelief painting his handsome features.

In a state of panic, you scrambled to get out of the bed. Shaking your head, you muttered, “Forget it, forget I said that,”

“Wait, wait, darling!” Sirius threw the blanket away from him and stumbled to his feet. He rushed to you before you could leave the dorm and took hold of your wrist, pulling you flush against his chest. That’s when you saw it, the inexplicable amount of happiness mixed with disbelief in his eyes that would rival the stars themselves.

“Can you-what-can you say that again?” Sirius said, his eyes watering as he leaned down to place his forehead against yours, gently.

You wiped your own tears, taking his face in your hands as you whispered just for him to hear, “I love you,”

A dry sob escaped Sirius lips as he smashed his lips to yours, his arms around your waist tightening as he kissed you passionately with all the love poured into. He pulled away to look at you in the eyes, his chest blooming with pride and love, engulfing his entire being.

Sirius peppered your face with kisses and pulled away to look into your tear-filled eyes, “I love you too, puppy. I always have and always will, until the very end,”

“Until the very end?” you asked, smiling widely.

Sirius tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, “Until the very end, darling. I still don’t know what we are going to do next but I know whatever it is, it’s going to be with you,”

You leaned up to press your lips to his, letting the two of you drown into the pure mixture of love, bliss and happiness.

And Sirius Black finally understood the feeling of being loved and loving someone.

[anthrofreshtodeath]

So, a little while back, @dirtyrobber70 sent me this song as a rizzles prompt, and I said that if it inspired something in me, I’d write about it. Well, it did LOL. Below is the product of a few dozen spins of this record (still not sure if I prefer this version or the Selena Gomez one, but they’re both pretty good).

The August evening, late, oppressive, muggy, creeps into Maura’s skin not by heat but by emotion. She is in a cabin in Western Massachusetts, and it is air conditioned, but she cannot help but tug at the robe around her neck as if it chokes her - it plunges down her middle, but the way it presses against the back of her neck feels like the pillory.

She is getting married. Tomorrow.

She is getting married to Jack tomorrow. And she chalks all these tumultuous feelings up to the humidity and nervousness, because truly, the venue is beautiful. She had splurged for a forest wedding, and spent even more to hold it on this compound, where each group of guests would have their own cabin, while she and Jack would have separate ones to themselves - for decorum and tradition, of course. She does not want to be seen before the wedding. By him, a niggling part of her brain tells her, she doesn’t really want to be seen at all.

She had accepted his proposal several months ago out of spite, really. To rouse passion in Jane, to shake her out of her complacency and perhaps lead her right into Maura’s bed. Jane, instead, had retreated. Far, far into work, into sport, into anything that had nothing to do with Maura.

And so, the spectacular plan had backfired. At least, Maura muses as she looks at herself in the mirror, full face still on, hair still styled in its usual straight waves, she will be getting a husband out of it.

Jane isn’t even here.

Maura stifles that thought because it makes her want to cry, and she had spent the last few weeks learning not to do so at every thought of Jane somewhere else. When the doorbell of the cabin sounds throughout the rooms, she thanks it, because it gives her another reason not to shed any tears. She cinches her robe tighter around herself, expecting to either have to let in an emotional Angela or send away a lustful Jack, and wanting neither of them to see more of her skin than absolutely necessary.

When she opens the door, that niggling part of her brain wishes she had torn the robe off. “Jane,” she breathes out, the name more the biological function of an exhale, the necessary conclusion of breath, than a word. It has transformed beyond simple semantics and now forms Maura’s marrow. She resents how much it feels like oxygen when she says it.

Jane is indeed standing there, in slacks and a baby blue button up shirt, still tucked in from the day’s work. She holds two glasses in one hand, and a bottle of vodka in the other, holding them up. “Hey, you,” she says, smoky and hot. She is three feet away, but the words singe the skin on Maura’s throat, like Jane is already kissing it, already putting hands on her waist, up her back, though Jane has never touched her before. It is the way greetings from Jane have always felt to Maura. Perfunctory hellos performed like sex.

She hates it, and she hates that it draws her in. “Hi,” she says quietly, the tears back. She refuses to let them fall, though. She has some dignity.

“Can I come in for a drink?” Jane asks, raising her tired eyebrows.

Maura wants to disappear into the hairline that they approach. She is frazzled. “Y-you’re… you’re here,” is all she can think to say.

“Yeah, I am. I need to talk to you, Maura,” says Jane. “And I understand if you want to do it with me standin’ outside, but we’ll have more privacy in there.”

Maura looks to where Jane spots the sofa, small and cozy just to the side of the kitchenette. They would be so close, and she cannot resist the prospect. Perhaps there isn’t as much dignity as she once thought. “Ok,” she assents.

Jane nods, humble but victorious, and then steps in. Maura closes the door behind her, checking the outside for eavesdroppers or onlookers one time, and then they both sit on the couch. Jane pours a shot worth of alcohol in each glass. “I know you hate vodka, but it’s the good stuff, at least,” she explains, holding her own up to the light. It is dim, just lamplight on either side, but the clear liquid still catches it. “This is how I think of you, you know,” she says, just before she downs it all in one go, pulling her lips back to grimace at the smooth burn all the way down.

“In a cabin with liquor?” Maura asks, confused. She sips hers, and yes she hates it. Yes, it is still good.

“Like a shot,” Jane says. “Even when I take you in small doses it’s still a shock to the system,” she looks up.

Maura freezes. It is an admission she did not expect. It sounds a lot like desire. She crosses her legs under her, turning sideways on the couch, because she is not wearing underwear and somehow Jane would be able to tell how wet she is becoming. “I… I’m not sure I…”

Jane pours herself another drink, but doesn’t take it. “I haven’t seen you in weeks, not really. One look at you now and I feel like I’m gonna jump outta my skin. And I know… I know this is a shitty thing to do, the night before your wedding.”

“Jane…” oxygen again.

“No, no. Lemme get this out, ok? Before I lose the nerve,” says Jane. With the second shot down, she shakes her head from the burn and hisses. “Shit. Ok. I’ve just… I think we’ve been overthinking this. The whole time we’ve been around each other, we’ve been too much in our own heads, especially me. And I hate it, because what’s the point in hiding? I like to act. I have to act. So, this is me actin’. I know, know that I’ll regret it if I didn’t say that this, you and me, could be so much better than what it is right now.”

“Anything is better than what this is right now,” Maura uses sarcasm to cut and to defend, because none of this seems real. Jane, confessing but not confessing, doesn’t seem real. “We don’t talk. You left.”

“I know,” Jane doesn’t fight, doesn’t blow up or try to deflect the blame, which scares Maura even more. Jane sounds like an adult in love and that is the most terrifying thing. “And that’s on me. You told me you were gettin’ married to Jack and I fucked up. I… let myself get too afraid of fighting for you, so I decided to throw a pity party for myself instead.”

“You want to fight for me?” Maura asks.

She sees the confusion and the horror on Jane’s face, flashing for only the smallest of seconds. “Y-yeah. Unless that’s not what you-”

Oh no, no, no. Maura must course correct before the train flies completely off the tracks. “Do you know why I insisted that Jack and I have separate cabins?”

Jane gulps. “Uh, it’s traditional?”

Maura shrugs. “Because I think of you every time I sleep next to him. And I imagine you holding me and… it makes me feel like a liar. I wanted one last night where I could feel you, want you, unbothered. Because I…” here come the tears, fat and full and streaking, “I’ll never get that chance again, after tomorrow.”

Jane doesn’t cry, but only just barely. Maura watches her suck her teeth and snarl, her tell that she’s holding it together by a thread. “You didn’t say,” she croaks.

Maura cries and rages. “Because every time I tried to get close to you, you’d run in the opposite direction! You did it again! Even when I said yes to him to get you to come to me!”

Jane’s head snaps up. “What?”

“This was supposed to spur you into the action you’re always talking about,” Maura says bitterly. “What an asinine plan.”

Jane puts her glass down and takes Maura’s, setting it aside. “Don’t do it,” she says, bold, feral in the pose that she enters: one leg planted on the ground, one ready to strike on the couch cushion, her arm against the back of it and her face inches from Maura’s.

She smells like vodka and lavender. “Ok,” Maura says. She can barely think of words when Jane is in her nostrils.

“Ok?” Jane asks, to be sure. “I love you. Ok?”

“Ok,” Maura says. She doesn’t wait to be claimed, but does the claiming when she pulls Jane on top of her. She takes to her back, moaning when all of Jane’s weight lands on her front, and Jane is kissing her just like she fantasized about. Jane even puts those long fingers on Maura’s side like Maura envisions when she touches herself. Except, the robe she has on is too slippery and she knows those fingertips would spark wildfire in her if they could just touch her skin.

She is frantic when they kiss, tongues darting against one another, lips sucking and pressing and smacking. She is loath to move her hands from Jane’s face, that handsome, handsome face, but she needs to open her robe. She tugs at the knot until it is loose, and then shoves the sides of it away. “Touch me,” she orders.

Jane obeys.

Maura moans into the cabin air and her body sings when Jane’s hands roam over breasts, down her back, between her legs. She pulls Jane’s shirt out of its tuck and gets to work on its buttons, because everything that is undone between them builds back up into something better in the end.

Her heart will unravel, dress down, be laid bare, and then in the morning, just like the clothes that will trail haphazardly to the bed, will signify something new.

Because Jane found her way back.

[rogue-durin-16]

THE RIGHT MOMENT

Summary: Y/n and George had been crushing on each other for too long, but neither of them said anything. They both were waiting for the right moment to do it, but with a war upon them, was there really such thing as 'the right moment'?

Pairing: George Weasley x Reader

Genre: angst-fluff

Tags:

George Weasley: ———

Permanent taglist: @elia-the-bibliophile @randomparanoid @karlthecat15722 @thebutchersdaughtersblog

Warnings: injuries, blood, implicit beating

A/N: (dis bish long lmao) Idk what is this, I just wanted to do something for George. Bill and Fleur's wedding came to my mind and I was like, ok but what happened after the death eaters arrived? And this came out, so enjoy <3

Rogue-durin-16 masterlist

I wasn't expecting to see her.

I had heard my mother mention her name whilst talking about the Order, and I knew she had befriended Fleur at the Triwizard Tournament, but seeing her apparate in our yard was... Well, surprising.

"Son, snap out of it!" My father called me out and I corrected my wand movement; I had almost messed up the canopy, and I blamed the way her dress and hair flew with the wind as she approached our home's entrance.

Fred walked to me the moment we had secured everything, glancing at the house before questioning, "am I delirious or that was Y/n?" with a knowing grin and an intent eyebrow wiggle.

As if taking a cue, we saw the girl coming out, now with a borrowed jacket on, making a beeline to us. "I'm... Pretty sure it's her." I replied, giving the girl a smile when she waved. "Morning, lady."

"Morning, gentlemen." Fred then turned around and stepped to her in order to give her a hug. "Long time no see, huh?"

"Indeed." I agreed, following my brother's lead and hugging Y/n; her arms were quick to wrap around my neck and shoulders and squeeze me tight; I would have sworn she let out a relieved sigh. "Fleur invited you?"

"Your mom, actually." Her reply left me puzzled. "I heard your night was... Eventful." She pointed at the bandages covering my ear with a worried look. "How are you feeling?"

"Better than last night." I replied, scratching the back of my neck.

"You sure, Georgie?" It was then that I remembered we weren't alone. "Last night he was feeling Saint-like." Y/n frowned in confusion. "Because he's holey." Fred pointed at his ear just like I had done the night before and I could feel my cheeks burning. "Get it?"

"Oh, no! it's sooo bad!" She laughed at the joke and a smile tugged the corners of my lips. "I think that's the lamest joke you've cracked." She pointed out.

"I know! I told him."

"Okay, I was bleeding out." I defended myself. "I think I'm allowed to crack a lame joke."

"Dunno, George, it was really bad." I threw my head back with a groan at Y/n's teasing. She waved at Fred, who said something about having things to do inside, and when my eyes landed on him over Y/n's shoulder, he mouthed a clear 'go for it'. "Tonks told me about Mad-Eye." She spoke again in a more serious note.

"You said it," the smile vanishing from my face. "Last night was eventful."

"When your mother told me you got hurt, I just... I got really scared." Her anxious words took me aback. "I went straight into the house to see you." The wind made her hair flow again, and I had to put my hands in my pockets to stop myself from tucking that bloody strand that kept getting in her face back behind her ear. "I was so happy you were out preparing stuff and not in there, unconscious in a bed."

"Well, I'm very happy to see you." I replied, my eyes digging into hers to make sure she knew how much I meant that. "Missed tons that smile of yours."

"I missed your lame jokes." I rolled my eyes at her response. Right after, she stepped forward and gently pulled me down; one of her hands holding onto my forearm, steadying her, while the other one cupped one of my cheeks so she could press a kiss to the other. "See you." And with that, she was off to greet the rest.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Do it."

"She's talking with Luna."

"Excuses." I puffed tired at Fred's reproach before taking a sip of my drink. "C'mon, you got absolutely nothing to lose."

"My dignity?"

"She fancies you!" I shook my head no. "How many times are you gonna have the opportunity to dance with her, Georgie? Stop being a twit."

"Not yet."

"Oi, have you seen Y/n?" Ron approached us, taking a seat by my side.

"It's the only thing he's seen." I pinched the bridge of my nose, unable to deny what my twin had just said. "Just do it." I groaned. "Okay, I'll do it."

"No!" I jumped up and tugged Fred down in the process. "Alright, I'll go."

READER'S P. O. V.

"Yeah, I was about to—"

I involuntarily let out a squeal when a hand tickled my side. "Hello, ladies." I spun my head to see George behind me. "I'm sorry to interrupt, but may I have this dance?"

Luna replied before I could. "You see, I was wondering how much time it'd take you to ask her." I turned as red as a beetroot; my only comfort was that the towering ginger's face was the colour of his hair. "I think I'm odd man out." She waved us goodbye and headed to see Harry.

"I reckon Luna is way too observant." He spoke, tugging my hand.

"Were you ogling me, Weasley?"

"Maybe." He came to a stop in the middle of the dancefloor and pulled me close. "Couldn't take my eyes off you." He confessed quietly.

As we swayed, I let my forehead land on his chest, savouring what I dreaded would be one of the last precious moments before everything went down.

"George?" He hummed, raising his brows as a prompt for me to talk. I took a deep breath and told myself that what I was going to say mattered little compared to whatever was looming over us. "I've been wanting to tell you this, but I just... Didn't find the right time." Our faces were mere inches away. "But I don't think I'll ever find the right time at this point so—"

I jolted, holding onto George, when a blue volute plunged into the tent; a Patronus.

It was not until Shacklebolt message was ending that I realized George's arms were around me, pulling me flush against his chest.

Both our hearts were hammering violently, and I was sure he could feel mine as clearly as I felt his.

When the Patronus vanished, panic began to spread. I noticed how my own breathing picked up. "Y/n." This time it was George the one calling my name; his whisper sounded so clear compared to everyone else's screams and cries. "If I don't say this out loud, I'll combust—"

"Y/N! GET DOWN!" Tonks's shouts snapped us out of it. We obeyed just in time to see a red hex flying over us, being stopped by Tonks herself.

George and I grabbed our wands and pulled each other back to our feet before joining the Order.

"FREDDIE!"

"LUNA!"

We parted ways, George making his way to reach his twin while I ran to a moderately tipsy Luna, who seemed to be struggling to find her father.

As soon as I made sure she was out of the picture, I jogged to help the twins, casting protection spells against two death eaters.

"STUPEFY!" I managed to take out the one attacking George, and he was quick to stun the one duelling his brother.

"Leave!" George tugged my hand, attempting to get me out of the canopy, his brother quickly rushing to their little sister.

"I'm not leaving!"

"Y/n—" I moved him out of the way to shield us from another hex. "Please— Flipendo!!" I saw another death eater flying away from us. "Shit!" George's hand gripped mine for dear life, making me back off with him to get back in when he realized it was too late for me to leave.

Soon enough it was just the Weasleys, Fleur and her family, Tonks, Lupin and me inside the tent, all back-to-back, surrounded by death eaters.

Corban Yaxley stepped out. "My apologies to disrupt the celebrations." he offered a fake apology to the newlyweds which was equally disgusting and scary. "Let's try by fair means." I knew my knuckles had gone white, given the strength with which I was gripping George's hand. "Where is Harry Potter?" He knew no one would speak. "Aight, by foul it'll be."

I looked around and I saw Molly and Arthur shielding Ginny; Bill and Fleur held onto each other; Lupin and Tonks pulled Fleur's sister and parents behind them; Fred gave a quick look at his twin before moving closer to us.

"Take them inside and register the house."

Soon we were being pushed into the Burrow, a bunch of death eaters before us ready to put all upside down.

We stayed quiet meanwhile, leaving out an occasional 'don't touch that' or a 'there's no need to break that' from Molly and Arthur.

"I reckon you won't find Harry in my grandma's glass cabinet, smart arse." We all turned to Fred, his mother giving him a pleading look.

"Maybe he's between the plates, Freddie," George jumped in, attempting to draw the attention off his brother. "You'll want to check the cutlery too, in case he's now a teaspoon." He suggested to Yaxley with a challenging look.

The death eater tilted his head to the side, as if he had noticed something worth of interest in George. "What happened to you?"

Everyone went livid.

"I fell downstairs." George replied through gritted teeth. His tone was full of what could be easily passed as anger, but by the way his hand was shaking, I reckoned it was fear.

Yaxley seemed to think for a second before turning to two of his mates. "Start with him, then the twin and we'll move on to—"

Before I knew what I was doing, my wand was out and hexing one of the guys that had tried to remove George from us.

"Take their BLOODY WANDS!" Yaxley stalked to me and grabbed my arm, pulling me away. "We'll start with you, miss."

"No! Wait, she doesn't know anything!" George tried in vain to persuade them, pushing through the death eaters in an attempt to get to me. I looked at him and shook my head no, already psyching myself up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

They were rather quick, and not half as bad as I thought they would be. I was thrown back into the living room with only a shiner and the promise of bruised wrists.

It was enough for George to jump up; not to check on me, though, but to do something as stupid as my impulsive hexing.

"Okay, crippled," three death eaters grabbed him before he could do anything and dragged to the bathroom they had gotten me in. "your turn."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

He looked bad.

Molly was about to throw hands when we saw George leaving the bathroom; a cut on the cheek, a bloody nose, a black eye and by the way he flinched while walking, probably an injured rib.

But the worst was the red pooling the bandage around his head, and the way he was struggling to keep his hand off it.

"C'mon, blabber." It wasn't surprising when Fred willingly approached Yaxley and punched him strong enough to throw him down. "You know-” He got up, motioning at his minions so they would get Fred in. “that just made it worse."

I spared Molly an enquiring look, to which she replied with a nod; in an instant, I was gently pulling George to the settee. "Let me see..." I pursed my lips, tilting his head to the side so I could check his wound. A sigh left my lips, suddenly realizing I couldn't really take off the bandage in front of them. "Can you sit it up?" I whispered only for him to hear.

He nodded, his hand travelling up to mine, which rested on his cheek, to give it a reassuring squeeze. I didn't think twice about how wrong the timing was before leaning in and placing a kiss on his lips.

GEORGE'S P. O. V.

My body moved forward by itself when she pulled back, attempting to chase her lips. I managed to stop myself when I remembered we were surrounded by death eaters and my family was right behind Y/n.

She then gave me a small smile and moved to grab a fresh towel from the kitchen. I caught a glimpse of my family's looks before she came back, ready to clean the blood on my face.

She aided Fred along with my mom; he bore the burnt along with me.

The sun was rising when Yaxley decided to leave. My father rushed to send a Patronus to the trio, and everyone felt a bit of relief and finally scattered through the Burrow. Ginny claimed she would take care of Fred, and she took my twin to our room.

"Now, let's check that." Y/n spoke, standing up so she could remove the damp bandage. "What happened?"

"He threw a punch and—" I hissed when the bandage left my ear, earning a concerned ‘sorry’ from Y/n. "The wound opened. It began to bleed, and they decided to stop." She only nodded, grabbing again the towel, now mildly red due to the blood it had cleaned. "That kiss was too short." I didn't even know how I managed to let that out.

She stopped, her eyes going up and down my body before inquiring, "want another one?"

"Please." She didn't need anything else for her soft lips to return to mines. This time it was one hell of a kiss, but my mouth chased them again when Y/n pulled away, only that this time her lips did return to mines for another short kiss. "Should I ask you on a date?"

"I doubt we'll be able to go on a proper date." We both chuckled; as sad as it sounded, it was true. "You can make me a coffee after I fix this, though."

"Gladly." I replied, my thumb caressing her cheek before bringing her to my lips one more time.

"FINALLY!" We both jumped at Fred's yelling. "It was about fucking time, really."

"Do you wanna get beaten up again?" Y/n harmlessly shoved my shoulder, hiding a laugh. "I just realized," I signalled my black eye and then hers. "We're matching."

"What a lovely way to match, is it not?" She replied, shaking her head with a smile on her face. “Come,” she caressed my cheek before carefully pulling me up. “I saw clean bandages over the sink.”

“Yes ma’am.” 

“Y/l/n,” her eyes travelled to my brother. “don’t you snog my brother in the lavatory where we just got beaten up.”

“Piss off, Fred.” She responded indifferent, pulling me with her into the bathroom, leaving the door completely open; she probably feared my mother would burst it open at the possibility of us doing inappropriate things in there.

“Yeah, piss off.” I agreed, siting down on the toilet so she could clean the wound. “She can snog me wherever she wants.” I added, muffling a laugh when Y/n cursed us both under her breath. “I’m sorry, love.”

“No, you’re not.” 

“No, I’m not.” I confessed with an amused grin.

“Why do I even fancy you?” She questioned, faking disappointment in herself.

“I’m very handsome?” I casually suggested, tilting my head for her to wrap the bandage without much difficulty. 

“Must be.” She agreed, leaning on to peck my lips. “Now where’s that coffee, sir?”

I got up, leading Y/n to the kitchen and instantly preparing the coffee pot. “It’s gonna be the best coffee you’ll ever taste.” I stated, as if it was a scientifical fact.

“Confident, are we?” she laughed, sitting on the counter besides me.

“Well, my four-year-long crush just kissed me.” I confessed. “So yeah, very.”

“Fred’s right.” I hummed, looking at her with an eyebrow raised as I handed her the coffee. “It was about fucking time.” We smiled at each other, way too widely for two people who had just gotten roughed up. We stayed next to one another in silence, looking through the window; I found the customary landscape particularly beautiful. 

[latte-fairytaekwoon]

𝑀𝑎𝑓𝑖𝑎! 𝐴𝑡𝑒𝑒𝑧: 𝑇ℎ𝑒 𝑂𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑀𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝐹𝑢𝑛 𝑂𝑓 𝐻𝑖𝑚 𝐹𝑜𝑟 𝐵𝑒𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑆𝑜𝑓𝑡

Disclaimer: In no way am I condoning, supporting, justifying or encouraging mafia activities or lifestyle. This is all fictional and not meant to represent real life scenarios.

✿*:･ﾟ𝓚𝓲𝓶 𝓗𝓸𝓷𝓰𝓳𝓸𝓸𝓷𝓰 ﾟ･:*✿

Hongjoong was startled by the sound of the door opening. He watched as you scurried over to his desk, boxes in your hand that you set down on the floor so you could clear off the papers in his desk.

"May I ask what are you doing?" He finally asked when you began placing the boxes on the desk.

"I need your help. It's of utmost importance."

Hongjoong stared in confusion as you began taking out various table decorations in all shades of pink. He pointed at them and looked to you for an explanation.

"It's my cousin's baby shower this weekend and I promised to make the table decorations, but I don't know which one to pick..."

You held up 2 different options for him to look at.

"So I need your opinion."

Hongjoong sighed softly and began pondering over his choices. Sure, they all looked pretty cute already, but he felt like they could be better. He took one of the decorations from your hand and began taking some things off.

"Hey! What are you doing?!" You screeched in horror.

"Relax and give me a moment." He looked inside the boxes and took out the fabric glue and scissors so he could modify it to his liking.

Now you understood what his plan was. You knew he loved to modify clothes, so of course he'd try to modify these ornaments. You decided to just watch him and see what he'd come up with.

You were both so engrossed in his task, you didn't notice Mingi had been standing by the door, trying to get Hongjoong's attention. He cleared his throat loudly, finally catching both of your attentions.

"If you grannies are done with your knitting and sewing, I have some papers for the boss here to see."

Mingi walked over and handed the stack of papers to Hongjoong. He snorted when he took in the sight of Hongjoong holding the glue and pink bows in his hand.

"What? You're telling me that'll cause more damage than a gun and bullets?" Mingi teased him.

Hongjoong threw the glue tube at Mingi, who only feigned to be hurt before walking out of the room, laughing his ass off and planning to tell the others.

You and Hongjoong looked at each other before laughing yourselves.

"Ok. Now back to our task."

✿*:･ﾟ𝓟𝓪𝓻𝓴 𝓢𝓮𝓸𝓷𝓰𝓱𝔀𝓪 ﾟ･:*✿

Seonghwa hated it whenever anyone would even so much as touch him. If one of the other guys merely brushed against him, he'd already be pulling out his mini lint roller to dust away imaginary dirt that got on his suit.

"Seriously? You're acting like I got the black plague or something." Wooyoung told him when Seonghwa took out a disinfecting wipe to wipe his hands after Wooyoung shook them.

"Worse. You got hoe germs."

When they heard rumors he was dating, they brushed them off as lies.

"No way. Man can't stand being around other people too closely." Yunho said.

"People can't stand being around him." Wooyoung never missed an opportunity to take a jab at Seonghwa.

"I feel bad for who ever does date him." Hongjoong shook his head.

But it turns out the rumors were indeed true, and not only did they find out about you, but they were even more shocked to see Seonghwa practically make out with you in his office. There were so many things going on that normal Seonghwa would have frowned upon.

"Well well well. What have we got here?" Hongjoong smirked at the 2 lovebirds.

Wooyoung let out a dramatic gasp.

"Seonghwa?! Letting someone sit on his desk? Whatever happened to 'don't touch my things?! You'll dirty them?' "

"Did he make you wash your hands before touching him?" Yeosang asked you curiously.

You simply blushed and looked to Seonghwa, wondering what was going on. Seonghwa pulled away from you to usher the boys out the room, threatening to throw bleach at them if they didn't stop. Locking the door, he went back to you and cupped your cheeks.

"Now....where were we my little honey bunch?" He leaned in to kiss you again.

"He even uses lovey dovey terms?!" Wooyoung's voice was heard from outside.

✿*:･ﾟ𝓙𝓮𝓸𝓷𝓰 𝓨𝓾𝓷𝓱𝓸 ﾟ･:*✿

Yunho proudly showed off the sonograms to the other guys.

"Look! You can already see her little hands forming."

The other guys had mixed reactions. While some like Seonghwa, San and Mingi were cooing along with him, Hongjoong, Yeosang and Jongho just awkwardly looked at each other, while Wooyoung was simply on his phone, not even paying attention.

"Need I remind you this was supposed to be an important meeting?" Hongjoong spoke up.

"Oh right! Sorry." Yunho quickly put away his phone and they all looked back at Hongjoong.

"Ok. As I was saying, they are to bring our shipment in on-"

He was interrupted once again by Yunho's phone ringing. Upon seeing it was you, Yunho immediately picked up.

"Hi love! How are you? How's my precious baby mama doing? Is our little dove doing ok?" He cooed into the phone.

Jongho and Yeosang began giggling, mimicking Yunho's love struck expressions and high pitched voice. Hongjoong was about to say something but Seonghwa interrupted.

"Say hi to Y/N for me!"

"Oh hold on! The boys wanna say hi!" Yunho put you on speaker.

"We do?" Wooyoung asked, finally looking up from his phone.

"Hi boys! How's it going?" You asked.

"Oh nothing much. Just witnessing how your husband turns into a baby when anything related about you and your bundle of joy is mentioned." Jongho said sarcastically.

Yunho pouted. " I do not."

"Oh really?"

Jongho turned to Yeosang and smiled like an idiot.

"Wanna see my baby's sonogram? Here let me show you!" Jongho made it a point to use his aegyo voice.

"Ooh! Y/N is getting rounder and chubbier and it's the cutest thing ever! She hates it but the pregnancy suits her well! I can't wait when I get her pregnant again." Yeosang played along adding the fakest laugh he could muster.

"Yes he can." Your voice reminded them that you were still there.

Yunho just blushed and giggled.

"You guys wouldn't understand! But one day you will."

✿*:･ﾟ𝓚𝓪𝓷𝓰 𝓨𝓮𝓸𝓼𝓪𝓷𝓰 ﾟ･:*✿

As one of the top snipers in the world, Yeosang had always had an image to uphold. He was rarely seen outside of work related events, he hardly talked and everyone swears he never smiles. His private life is practically classified as well, not even his best friend of 5 years could tell you if he has a family or not. To his friends, Yeosang is just cold and heartless.

"Guys.... is that who I think it is?"

San's voice had everyone looking at what he was pointing at. It took them all a minute to comprehend what they were looking at, but once they did, they were shook.

"It's Yeosang! And he's.....smiling?!" Mingi exclaimed, putting on his glasses to make sure he wasn't seeing things wrong.

"He's not just smiling, he's giggling!" Yunho added.

"And he has.......a girlfriend?!" Wooyoung was offended and hurt that he never knew about this information.

They all stood there, watching as Yeosang and you acted all loving towards each other. They couldn't believe The Kang Yeosang was capable of falling in love. The rest of the boys looked at each other and smirked. This was perfect.

Few days later, they cornered. Yeosang at work.

"What do you dumbasses want now?" He asked, his usual cold gaze on his features.

"We want to meet your girlfriend." San replied.

For a brief second, Yeosang's eyes betrayed him, expressing shock that they knew, but he quickly composed himself.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Yunho quickly took out his phone and presented their evidence in the form of pictures. Yeosang looked at them and gulped, finally realizing his secret was out. He stared at the floor in shock.

Yunho laid his head on Yeosang's shoulder and teased.

"Now unless you want them all over the internet, I suggest you let us meet her."

Yeosang pushed him off and sighed.

"Looks like I have no choice......"

The other guys cheered at the success of their blackmail. But it was a little too early for a celebration as Yeosang finished his sentence with:

"But to take you all out."

They all shut up and looked at him.

"Please say you're joking."

✿*:･ﾟ𝓒𝓱𝓸𝓲 𝓢𝓪𝓷 ﾟ･:*✿

"I told you guys I can't go, I already made plans."

San sighed as his friends wouldn't quit bothering him about going over to Seonghwa's house to get drunk.

"You liar!" Mingi exclaimed through the phone.

"That's rich coming from you. Now bye."

San hung up his phone and decided to turn it off so they wouldn't bother him. He then went back inside the kitchen, where you were already placing the first batch of cupcakes in the oven.

"Baby can you set a timer for 30 minutes?"

San grabbed the stop watch and promptly did as you asked. He then pulled you into a hug and just held you there.

"Don't tell me you're planning on doing this for 30 minutes." You giggled.

"Precisely my plan."

Meanwhile, the other guys were in Seonghwa's car, who was driving well above the speed limit to get to San's house. If he wouldn't come over to them, they'd come over to him.

"We're not letting him ditch us on dude's night." Mingi said.

They quickly went up to his apartment and rang the doorbell. 5 minutes passed though and no answer. They looked at each other for options before Jongho stepped up and kicked the door open.

Hearing the door slam, San and you got scared, thinking it was an intruder. San quickly pulled you behind him, ready to attack whoever came in.

"Surprise! We- AAAAH!" Wooyoung screamed, as he was hit with frosting that San squirted into his eyes.

"What the hell are you guys doing here?" San asked as he helped Wooyoung regain his vision.

"We're doing guy's night out at your place!" Jongho said happily.

"What? No! I told you guys I had plans!" San repeated.

"Well........ here we were thinking you had mission plans.....but instead...it's baking plans." Hongjoong snorted as he looked at the half-decorated cupcakes on the kitchen island.

"I promised my baby we'd make cupcakes for her nephew's birthday party tomorrow." San explained as he went back next to you and wrapped his arm around you, looking at you with fluttering eyes.

"Wow.......you've gone soft Choi San." Seonghwa pointed out.

"What! No I have not!" San defended himself.

"You're softer than this cupcake. Delicious by the way." Yeosang popped up behind him, half a cupcake already in his mouth.

"Hey! That's not for you!"

✿*:･ﾟ𝓢𝓸𝓷𝓰 𝓜𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓲ﾟ･:*✿

It was all tension in the room. A recent mission had gone terribly wrong and what was supposed to be a calm discussion soon turned into a jabbing fest between the men.

"I told you all we shouldn't trust those Stray Kids, but nobody ever listens to me." Mingi huffed.

"Mingi, that's because the last time we listened to you, you cost us 1.5 million dollars!" Hongjoong reminded him.

"Meanwhile you almost costed us our lives today, not to mention about 200 of our best men. What kind of leadership is that?"

Soon Hongjoong and Mingi were up in each other's faces, each waiting for the other to throw the first punch so he can retaliate. The other guys hesitated between telling them to back off or let them blow off some steam.

"Please! We both know you don't have the guts to fight me. I will literally murder you with my bare fists! Don't think I won't hesitate to punch your little face into-"

A knock interrupted Mingi's threat to Hongjoong. He stormed over to the door, ready to shoot whoever dared to interrupt him. He briskly opened the door.

"The fuck you ass- Y/N! Baby, what are you doing here?"

His tone immediately went down once he realized it was only you. You smiled up at him and held out his holster for him.

"You left your gun back home. I was worried you wouldn't be able to defend yourself without it." You answered him.

Mingi blushed and took it from you.

"Awww baby, you really didn't have to. And besides, you know I don't like you carrying things like these. You might accidentally hurt yourself." He whined cutely at you.

The other guys were on the verge of laughing. It was always funny to see how quickly Mingi went soft and sweet for you.

"All right, I promise I won't do it again."

You held out your pinkie to him, which he linked with his own before holding your hand up to kiss it.

"I'll see you later. Love you sweetheart."

With a peck to your lips, he watched as you walked away, letting out a blissful sigh once you were out of sight.

"Ok Romeo, we get it. You're in love and it's gross. Can we get back to what we were saying before I break this table out of anger at this lovey dovey mush?" Jongho complained, groaning at the loving scene that just took place.

✿*:･ﾟ𝓙𝓾𝓷𝓰 𝓦𝓸𝓸𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓰 ﾟ･:*✿

"Hyung? Can you buy this for me?"

Jongho held out a bag of chips to Wooyoung, who just scoffed.

"We're in the middle of stalking someone and you're seriously asking me to buy you snacks?" Wooyoung couldn't believe the younger member.

"Hey. We need to look as normal as possible and it's a store! Come on! Buy them for me."

Jongho actually made puppy eyes at Wooyoung but to no avail, he wasn't budging for nothing.

"I'll pay you back later! I left my wallet in the car." Jongho was begging by now.

"No. I, Jung Wooyoung, don't buy anything for anyone but myself."

Just then his phone rang and he picked up.

"Hi pumpkin! How are you? Hmmm? No I'm not busy! Just here at the store with Jongho." He spoke into the phone.

Jongho rolled his eyes.

"Oh no! My little baby is feeling bad? We can't have that." Wooyoung pouted when he heard you were ailing.

Jongho raised his eyebrow at Wooyoung.

"Don't worry sweetheart. I'll get everything for you. See you soon. Bye love."

Jongho thought he was going to barf when Wooyoung actually made kissing noises into the phone.

"Ok, we need to get pads, tampons, ice cream and chocolate asap." Wooyoung declared as he began walking to the freezer aisle.

"What?! No way! How embarrassing!" Jongho crossed his arms in defiance.

"Come with me. That's an order." Wooyoung practically dragged Jongho, who just groaned and complained the entire time.

"Why are you like this Hyung? You weren't like this before. It's so ewww!" Jongho cringed.

"Because Jongho, this is what love does to you."

✿*:･ﾟ𝓒𝓱𝓸𝓲 𝓙𝓸𝓷𝓰𝓱𝓸 ﾟ･:*✿

You were currently cuddled up to Jongho. He had promised only 25 more minutes and he'd take you home, but it quickly turned into an hour and you were tired. You were sitting on his lap, your face hidden in his neck, arms clutching his shoulders as you drifted off to sleep.

Jongho kept one arm around you, the other busy filling out some paperwork. Sensing you were falling asleep, he began to sing softly to you, he knew you loved falling asleep to the sound of his voice. He continued to sing even after you completely fell asleep, smiling occasionally at how adorable you looked.

The door opened and Yunho came in. He was about to ask something, but Jongho held a finger to his lips, ushering him to stay quiet so he wouldn't wake you up. Yunho looked at you two in shock before smirking.

"Aren't you two the cutest things ever?" Yunho teasingly whispered.

Jongho rolled his eyes at him before handing him the papers he came for. Feeling him move, you slightly shifted. Scared of waking you up, Jongho quickly held you closer and began to sing again, happy that he got you to stay asleep.

Yunho clutched his heart and cooed faintly. He actually took out his phone to take a picture.

"So cute." He showed off the picture to Jongho.

Not amused, Jongho held his fist up to Yunho, silently threatening to break him if he didn't leave.

"Ok ok calm down lover boy. Have a good night." Yunho left you two alone.

After a minute or two, Jongho got up and began carrying you bridal style to the car. He had just gotten you in the passengers seat and he himself got on the driver's side when you whined softly and rubbed your eyes.

"Jongho?" You called out.

"It's all right baby. Go back to sleep." He whispered softly to you as he strapped you into the car, kissing your temple before turning the car on to go back home with you.

Gifs not mine, credit goes to their respective owners.

[zuffer-weird-girl]

Prepare for trouble, and make it double!

My attempt of making a writing colab along with @thotsforvillainrights and her beautiful baby Kaishi! Hope I made justice for your cute little one!

"Boreeeeeeed....." the kid whined, upside down besides his fatger on the couch as he read a book without much caring it in the first place.

With a huff, Kaito raised himself up and kneeled right besides his dad, leaning his hubby cheek against his shoulder.

"Papaaaa?" The boy almost whined as Kai only flipped a page of his book. The five year's old pouted as he stood up and started to make noises with his mouth, knowing how much Kai was bothered by them.

"For crying out loud, what?" The older malr snapped as Kaito stopped making noises and just stared blanky back at him "Well?"

"I'm bored."

"... do I look like an amusement park to you brat?" Kai sighed before driving his attention to his book "Go play with your toys or read something. "

"You are the most boring dad in the world papa." Kaito pointed out with a frown and before Kai could come back with some smart ass reply they heard door's noises and Kaito immediately brighten up.

"Mama!" The boy shouted in goee as he climbed off the sofa as Kai immediately thanked God or whoever was above for you to finally be home.

"Woah hey bub!" You giggled with a few packs on your hands as the child hugged onto your lev with all the strenght he had.

"I missed you! Being with papa alone is boring." You tried to prevent a snort to come before you just giggled and carresed both of your son's checks lovingly.

"Guess what? There is a surprise on the hallway and maybe you womt be just as bored."

"But papa said we cant have a dog." The kid pouted as your heart clenched a little... you were still fighting over Kai to at least get a puppy.

"Is not a puppy sweetie. But is your cousin Kaishi!" You smiled brightly as your son's (e/c) shined a bit even if his face didn't changed at all "Go say hi to him and be nice!"

"Ok." The kid nodded and went pass you as you picked the bags and soon heard shrieks of gless coming from the hallway and a very fearfull looking Chisaki Kai almost drop himself on his way as he found you with wide eyes.

"I heard screaming. From two kids. We have only one. What did you do?!" He almost exclaimed as you arched an eyebrow and giggled.

"You already forgot hon? Our nephew Kaishi is here to spend the day with us. Isn't adorable? Kaito will have a playdate almost!" You stopped giggling when your husband's face went as pale as it could get "oh my god Kai you're okay?!"

"T-Two... brats... Two little demonic pests... in the same house... in my house..." his golden eye twitched as he brought one of his hands to scretch his forearm.

"Aren't you being a little overdramatic?" You tried to coax him to relax until you both froze at the sounds of devilsh giggles, pots falling and surely Rappa and Mimic's screams of anger.

"I am not." If you didn't knew your husband, you surely would've tell by his tone of voice that he was actually terrified.

.

.

.

"This drink will make everyone's who drink it into a rat!" Kaishi exclaimed while adding dead leafs into the pot as kaito nodded with a determined and concentrated face.

"Rats like cheese... I guess maybe a bit of spoiled cheese?" Kaito offered while pointing at to the trash can.

"Yeah! That will work!" Kaishi smiled as Kaito quickly picked with his already dirty hlittle hands the before saftely wrapped spoiped cheese and dropped onto the pot.

"Now what?" The boys looked at each other before Kaishi picked a bit of mud nearby, silently suggesting to put as Kaito smiled and nodded.

The... substance, was indeed something. Not only the appearance of it was terryfing but the smell of it almost made the two young boys puke.

"We will have to drink that?" Kaishi spoked, his little voice all funny due to him covering his nose as Kaito immediately shocked his head in disaproval of the idea "So who will?"

"..."

"..."

"Papaaaa!!!!" "Uncle Kaiii!"

He froze aat the voices of the boys as he was trying to play shogi in peace with Pops as the elder only chuckled when the two energetic boys opened the door's room, Kaito carrying a cup of God's know why.

"What now?" He arched an eyebrow from his place of the couch at Kaito covered in mud and dirt offering him a cup.

"Drink it!" Kaito told simply as Kaishi covered his mouth to prevent a giggle to escape.

"Why on hell I would do something like that?" He stared at the two before he felt his hives appearing on high speed "You both. Bath. Now."

"Drink this first papa!!" Kaito stoomped his foot down, not getting a tad bit scared when Kai just stood up with a glare.

"Kaito Chisaki."

"Drink it!" The boy accidentaly tripped and it sended the mixture right on Kai's necj and some of it on his mask... thankfully.

"Oh geez." Pops chuckled while grabbing his cup of tea as he saw in question of minutes Kaishi grabbing his cousin's hand and yelling to run as Kai ran after them with a pissed offf shout.

.

.

.

You finishedd making the snacks for the kids until you saw your husband on the doorway, eye twitching, sleeves rolled back, from head to waist all dripping wet as the two boys greeted you like little angels... and to notify, they were sparkling almost.

"Uh... I heard some shouting but I thought you three were playing so.." you smiled awkwardly as you picked Kaishi up as he nuzzled on your neck as Kaito pouted as the jelly little mommy's boy he was.

"Those pests..." your husband muttered in a murdeful tone of voice before sighing and going straight to the bathroom.

"What did you two do to your poor uncle and father huh?" You asked as the two boys stared at you back before both replying in the same time.

"We tried to turn him into a rat."

Oh dear...

.

.

.

You soon notice that the boys were handfull even to yourself together so you quickly offered a movie to put on as you saw the look of your husband's face as he tried to just eat his dinner in peace but alas, his son and nephew had other plans on just asking ever type of question possible and if not answered right away they poked him, not caring about his mysophobia anymore.

"You're an angel you know that..." you smiled in sympathy as your Kai rested his head on your shoulder, completely drained from having to deal with two versions of hyperative children of the same gene.

"You deserve to rest my poor baby." You murmured while kissing his temple as he grumbled something.

"Gross." Kaito commented as Kaishi nodded in aproval.

"Disgusting." Kaishi tried to imitate Kai's voice only to end up laughing along with Kaito.

"... tell me is already the time to bed for those..." your husband almost begged until Kaito got up to fist your clothes on his tiny fists and rest his head on your lap.

"Can Kaishi stay the night mama? Pretty please?" He asked with the puppy dog eyes you just couldn't refuse.

"Absolutely no-" "of course honey." Kai got his face up from your neck only to glare daggers at you as the children cheered.

"You traitor..." he spoke in utter disdust as you could only giggle.

.

.

.

"The boy are sleep. The extra cushion did came in handy." You smiled as your husband immediately fell into the bed with a groan.

"They're quite... handfull." You laughed at his mumbling and went to do your night routine... as soon as you finished you got out of the bathroom to met Kai already on his back staring at the ceiling before those amber eyes fell on you.

"They did drain your energy out today huh?" You sit down close to him and softly started to comb your fingers into his hair as he sighed in relief.

"... Lay down.. is getting cold and I dont want you to get sick." He mumbled sleepy as you smiled in utter love for usual anti social germophobic man, giving excuses only for you to lay down and touch him.

"Needy arent we?" You teased, face front to him as he opened one eye lazily before testing the waters and giving you a kiss that soon turned heated.

"I will show you needy."he growled lowly as you felt already heat coming down there and also a tad bit of hardness on his part as he hover over you to attack your neck only for-"

"We can't sleep." Kaito opened the door, carrying his plushie as Kaishi yawned wlazily and opened one eye.

"Auntie? Uncle?"

You just patted your husband's back when he just dropped on you and screamed in frustation on the crook of your neck.

Tough day for daddy Kai.

[lifewithdavefarts]

DaveFarts - Episode 1 “FartsApp” [Episode List] Since he’s a gassy nerd, Dave teases his friend Tim via WhatsApp by sending him a series of short videos of him farting.

FartsApp

Being gay with a fart fetish is really hard sometimes.

For me at least.

While the world is definitely getting more open-minded about homosexuality, I can’t really force it to accept this weird fetish (to be honest, all fetishes are kinda treated like taboos, regardless of the sexuality involved). I had to settle for YouTube videos or websites devoted to this whole fart-sniffing thing; not that I’m complaining: it was good to discover that so many people actually had this fetish.

Cue Dave. Well, sort of, actually. He doesn’t have a fart fetish and he’s not even gay. Dave has been my best friend since forever. Unlike me, however, he’s straight and is currently dating some (lucky) girl.

Around my age, he’s like a brother to me, and we’re actually well-known because of how much time we always spend with each other.

Dave is a great guy, a great friend, very open-minded and, dare to say it, actually quite hot.

Not surprisingly, being the brother I never had, he’s the first friend I came out to, the only one who knows about my homosexuality. Actually, it’s not like I told him… he found out on his own, in the worst possible way (for me).

During one of our nerdy game-nights, being “that one gassy friend”, Dave started to rip -as usual- tons of farts, fueled by some junk food, until he ripped one directly in my face (and boy it was amazing…). Everything went downhill from there… kinda. For some reason or another… he just accepted all at once not only my homosexuality, but also the fact that I found face-farting… hot. He just laughed about it and honestly gave me some encouraging words about my peculiar situation, proving that he’s indeed the best friend ever. Oh… and he also literally farted for me after that, in my face, letting me sniff and enjoy his amazing rips; he can also fart on command apparently: got a taste of his talent that same night.

That one, surreal night.

I still can’t believe it happened.

Felt like a confused dream. Like one of those nights where you drink too much so you don’t clearly remember what happened. But it was all true.

Dave, my best friend, was perfectly fine with me, my fetish, and all this weird stuff.

Yes: I know how lucky I am.

It’s been 4 months since he found out.

And, believe it or not, I’m getting face-farted so often that I’m almost forgetting how beautiful it feels.

Seriously: Dave simply accepted it like I’m living in someone’s crazy fetish dream and, when we’re alone, he just casually farts in my face (without me asking for it). Not always, but very often.

Surprisingly enough, despite the fact that my nose spends a lot of time brushing against his denim-covered butt, our friendship didn’t change at all though: we still hang out with the rest of our friends and generally spend a lot of time together.

Sometimes I’m so in disbelief about how easy-going he’s been with me, that I randomly ask him “You sure you’re OK with… this?” (I say, gesturing all of me), but he just smiles or rolls his eyes annoyed, tired of hearing the same question over and over again. What can I say? He’s perfectly comfortable with his own sexuality I guess, so he doesn’t have any problem with my fetish.

Sometimes though -sorry I say this- I kinda wish he did…

No, I’m definitely not complaining. That’s the best possible scenario for me, but sometimes he can get a bit too… inopportune. Dave is not really a prankster, but he loves teasing his friends, just for fun, including me.

I was in the middle of an important exam once, one of these pop-quiz thingies that make zero sense, and I felt my phone vibrate. I checked my FB private messages and all I saw was this YouTube link sent by Dave. Since I’m a fool apparently, I clicked on it, and one of those popular YouTube fart videos popped up and played, one with really loud farts. The first fart actually echoed in the room and other students glared at me: never felt so embarrassed (not including the night Dave found out about my fetish).

“Dude! Stop sending me this stuff!” I texted him. “I’m in the middle of an exam here!”

I scolded him for this, but the truth is that I couldn’t ask for a friend more open-minded than him.

The fact that he teases him with fart videos like he teases our heterosexual friends with those “shock” porn pics made me feel more… accepted.

But still… I was in the middle of an important exam so he had to stop.

And he obviously didn’t.

He sent me like 10 other links, just to annoy the sh%t out of me.

I mocked him by texting something like “Those videos are quite hard to find. Guess you’re gay too then!” but he would reply with “I had a great teacher!” and send me one of my awkward photos from Facebook.

Other times, since our friendship didn’t change a bit, he even made random references to my homosexuality or even my fart fetish when messaging me to make plans for the night (especially during the weekend). This mostly happens on WhatsApp:

Dave: “Dude, you have to come with us. Stop being a whiny little bi*ch and get up from that couch!”

Tim: “Sorry, man. I don’t think I’ll be joining you tonight…”

Dave: “You know what? If you don’t come with us… you’re gay!”

Dave: “Sorry, I mean… if you don’t come with us, you’re a fuc*ing heterosexual!

Dave: "U ride pussy, don’t you? Fuc*ing straight people!”

He was obviously being sarcastic, but I just loved how he adapted his… uhm… “humor” to my situation.

One time, however, things got a bit… hotter for me…

Dave: “Dude, come over. We have a lot to study…”

Tim: “Sorry, really can’t today. Aren’t you with Dana right now anyway?”

Dave: “I need somebody to focus with, not focus on. You know me and Dana always end up in bed after like 20 minutes.”

Dave: “It’s awesome but this stuff ain’t gonna study itself…”

Yep. Dave and his girlfriend Dana apparently had a very active sex life.

Glad he was getting laid. And Dana was pretty cool to be honest.

Tim: “Dave, sorry. Maybe tomorrow, k?”

Dave: “Dude! Come on! I’m farting like crazy today!”

Did… did he just try to “bribe” me using his farting abilities?

Dave: “Seriously. I just ripped one that was like 10 seconds long. What a waste of farts!”

Tim: “Dave… are you crazy?”

Took a couple of minutes to reply to that one, and then I got two messages at once.

Dave: “Oh yessss, Tim, crazy for youuuuuu!” he wrote, with a heart emoticon at the end (again, he’s a sassy bi*ch as usual).

I then saw that WhatsApp was loading a video sent by him, an actual video, not a link.

It was Dave, a smirk drawn on his face while staring at the camera. He was wearing a simple black shirt. The view soon moved and I saw his slightly sagging-butt in jeans sitting on a wooden chair, and then heard this big fart echoing in his living room (he was alone), rumbling loudly and hard on the wooden surface. He even turned the camera to his face while he was forcing the “classic”-sounding fart out, making funny facial expressions; indeed, the fart lasted almost 10 seconds, and I obviously loved that: biggest farts I’ve ever heard from him in awhile! It was like watching those funny fartvines on… well… Vine, but having my best friend as the funny/hot farter this time.

Dave: “Hope that convinced you…” he then texted.

I was kinda… “offended” by that last message.

I mean, yeah, I seriously wanted to be there, but I always love spending time with Dave, farts or not (that’s why we’ve been friends since… forever).

Tim: “Are you seriously using farts to buy my friendship? It’s not like I don’t want to study with you. I just can’t today!”

Was that too harsh? Should I have added a smiley face at the end?

Only thing I was sure of, is that I never thought that a sentence like that would even make sense someday.

And I was still bewildered by how Dave was so comfortable with the fact that I loved farts.

Tim: “You don’t need farts to convince me, Dave. More like… you’re making me suffer!” I joked, finally breaking the ice myself with a reference to my embarrassing fetish, proving that I indeed wanted to be there with him, enjoying those farts.

Another couple of minutes passed.

Was he making another…?

Dave: “I know you’re suffering, Tim. Don’t worry. That’s why I’m sending you this.”

Oh boy, another video. Should I play it? Was he aware that I was getting a boner from all of this?

I literally pitched a tent in my pants.

There… it’s Dave again, this time sitting on the couch. The video started with his face winking at the camera with a sly smile; the camera then moved between his legs and slowly panned towards his butt in loose jeans (he probably put his legs on the small table in front of his couch, to make his butt more visible). Now I had a rather unique (and hot -for me) view of both his butt (and part of his crotch) in jeans and his face. He grinned wildly and the fart began, ripped right in front of the phone. The sound and the views were perfect; Dave moved the camera towards his butt as the fart kept going strong, sounding like a deep trumpet; I could see the detailed blue fabric of his jeans as the funny sounds continued. What a lucky phone!

It lasted around 8 seconds and it was simply the hotness.

The video ended with Dave laughing at the camera and all went pitch black.

Tim: “You’re insane, Dave!” I joked again, enjoying how crazy he was about this. And for me I guess.

But I had to tell him.

Tim: “Dave, you do know that all of this gave me a… well…”

But as I was halfheartedly writing the second part of the message, Dave wrote more stuff.

Dave: “Then go beat your meat! I can’t do everything for you, Tim.”

Dave: “And please don’t act like this is some kind of big deal…

Dave: "Wow, Tim got a boner! How impressive!”

Dave: “Let’s all bow to Tim, the mighty guy whose penis can turn bigger!”

Dave: “Behold, the Great Tim! The guy who once had a boner and had to tell everyone!”

Further proof that Dave was being the best friend ever.

He was clearly being sarcastic; he was joking. That was his way of telling me “Nah bro, it’s all good”. And I was kinda surprised that he was so… chill about this stuff. I literally had a boner because of him and he just… didn’t care. As I said, he’s very open minded and perfectly comfortable with his own sexuality, so he didn’t have the irrational fear of “turning gay” when doing this stuff with and for me. I also appreciated that he trusted me with those funny, but otherwise embarrassing videos.

After one or two minutes, I’ve received one big audio file and I just knew what I was going to get when I clicked the triangular-shaped button to play them.

I heard Dave singing my name like he was some kind of serial killer trying to find me.

Dave: “Tim… come here…”

I then heard a series of muffled noises, as if the camera was being put under something, and it was clear what: I in fact then heard the loud, audio-glitching sound of one big fart that lasted around four seconds.

Dave: “He’s waiting for you…” he sung again in that creepy tone of voice.

Another fart, just as big as the first one.

He was on fire that day!

Now I was both laughing like an idiot and having the biggest boner.

Tim: “Dude, you’re on fire! But… to be honest, that was kinda gay…” I chuckled.

Dave: “Says the guy who gets a boner when he hears a fart. You fuc*ing hypocrite.”

He then sent yet another audio file, with him singing that meme-song “I’m gay, gay, gay, I love long big c*cks”, but slightly changing the lyrics. He even put a karaoke version of it on his computer while recording the audio file.

Dave: “You are gay, gay gay, you love long big farts. ‘cuz you’re supah-super gay, and you love big…”

Fittingly enough, a huge fart from my best friend took over the last part of the song. Loud as usual, sounding like a deep chainsaw. I could just imagine how beautiful that was. But the best part was probably the fact that he was definitely farting for me. I know, not your usual “hot sexy” scenario… more like a “sweet” one, in a very twisted way of course.

I wasn’t obviously offended by that “gay song”, since I knew that Dave was just being silly as usual and his mocking words were definitely not mean-spirited.

Tim: “Aren’t you supposed to be studying right now?” I asked.

Dave: “I don’t know, aren’t you supposed to be here right now?”

Tim: “Dude, seriously. Thank you! But I’m serious… I really can’t today.”

Dave: “Alright… alright… cya tonight faggot…” he wrote, with a heart-shaped emoticon at the end.

I just rolled my eyes and chuckled a bit, then drove my attention to my own books.

This was going to be a long afternoon. But after only one minute of silence, my phone vibrated wildly: it was Dave and he was calling me. Very unusual in that moment.

“Uhm… Dave? Hello?” I picked up.

I was greeted by a series of “Dude, sorry!” and I was really confused.

“Dave… what?”

It was just Dave being adorkable I guess.

“Dude, sorry about that 'faggot'… that was bit too much, sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

I laughed in disbelief. “Bro, it’s OK. I’m not offended. I know you didn’t want to insult me or anything…”

“No, Tim. That one word is not a joke and I shouldn’t have used it, sorry.”

I was just… wow. Dave went from “dominant friendly farter” to “adorable/awkward confused puppy” in mere seconds. Further proof that I was the luckiest guy alive (fetish or not): Dave cared so much for me that he even apologized for the “f-word”, which admittedly is a very bad word for a guy like me. But this time it was coming from Dave, my best friend, a guy who cares so much about me that he would even “censor” his language just to avoid unfortunate implications.

Ironically enough, the roles were switched, and he was the one saying a rapid-fire series of “sorry!” this time.

“Dave, quit with the apologizing. You’re the best.” I chuckled. “We’re bros, that’s what we do: we insult each other!”

“Alright… you sure? Not going to use that word ever again though.”

“Dave… it’s OK. You’re the best.”

“OK… OK. See you tonight. Take care.”

And he hang up.

He just wanted to make sure that he didn’t accidentally offend me by calling me a “fag”.

I would have been, if it wasn’t coming from Dave.

But then again, he also said that he was going to kick in the face whoever dared to insult me.

And he said that before he found out the truth about me: he’s always been quite protective.

“Oh come on!” I shouted, almost annoyed, merely five minutes later, when I heard the phone vibrate one more time.

It was Dave. Again.

He sent another video.

I tried to scoff at it but I was obviously loving all of this instead.

He was lying on the couch, the camera focusing on his butt in jeans. I could see both his face and butt, at the same time. It was like he filmed the video imagining my POV when he farted in my face, and I absolutely enjoyed that.

“Alright, Tim… Sorry for calling you a faggot.” he spoke in a “comically” serious voice. He truly was “sorry”, but it was clear that he was trying not to laugh. “I’m really, really sorry, believe me.”

Keeping a straight face, he ripped an incredibly loud, deep fart at the camera. He didn’t bat an eye, blink or smile. He eventually lost it towards the end of that 6-seconds long blast. He chuckled a bit and then turned “serious” again.

“That was a sad fart… we’re both sorry.”

He then closed his eyes and made a funny face, signing in relief as he ripped another long fart, the lucky camera slowly panning towards the seams and textures of the blue denim covering his powerful sagging butt. It lasted almost 10 seconds: truly a fart master. And those weren’t even on command!

“Oh my…” I whispered, staring in awe at the amazing video.

“This one was on the house…” he chuckled, right before turning the phone to his butt one last time and ripping a short series of toots, grinning wildly, clearly forcing those smaller farts out just for me. And that was it.

My boner was definitely wet now as bits of that well-known white substance poured from the tip of of my “standing” dick, slightly dampening my boxers and pants. It was like a volcano going to explode. A volcano that, just like me, couldn’t take it anymore. I rushed to the bathroom and furiously beat my meat, almost strangling my rock-hard penis with a firm grip. I didn’t last much: I literally peed sperm, thinking of Dave’s farts. The best part is that I didn’t need to imagine anything: it was all real. I laughed in relief just as I felt my penis deflating like a balloon, after it vomited its white substance. It felt good, not “masturbation good”, like “life is good”. And it was.

My best friend, Dave, was this fantastic guy who, in his own, twisted way, was taking care of me, accepting me, making me comfortable with my fart fetish. A gassy, open-minded, mildly disgusting “bro” who only wanted to preserve our friendship.

And I couldn’t be happier.

End of Episode 1