#ok lowkey tho jae how tf U drop me when we’re hugging…. loose ass grip 😒

[lionhanie]

OK HELLO…. WHY DID I GET CHILLS

One Winter Night (Myung Jaehyun)

pairing: nonidol!jaehyun x genderneutral!reader

genre: angst, strangers to friends(?)

warnings: attempted suicide, accidental suicide, implications of abuse.

✦ Why? that was the one question you couldn't get out of your head as you stand on a bridge staring off into the distance.

𐙚 bookshelf • wc: 801 | @onedoornet

please ignore grammatical errors!

listen to this song to have a better reading experience! ⤵

It’s a random winter night, it’s snowing. To others, this night had been something special to them. To some, they’re either out with their significant other or with their friends. Some are with their family. And to some, this was just another regular night. But there are also people like you. People who just can’t take it anymore, who won’t take it anymore.

And there you were, standing in the middle of a bridge staring off into the distance. You couldn’t handle the difficulties life had given you. Why? That question lingers in your mind. Why did it have to happen to you? Why is it always you? Why? Why? Why? If you decided to keep on living would things change? Or would it stay the same? Leaving you to keep experiencing the horrors you had to face every day. All these thoughts scatter throughout your mind, consuming you. You couldn’t take it anymore, you had to escape.

Your body trembles as you walk nearer to the edge. Finally, you can rest. But why do you still feel so reluctant? You were having second thoughts, but then you realized what would await you if you went back. No, you can’t go through all of that. Not again. As you try and climb up the railing, you suddenly feel someone grab your arm.

“Stop, don’t do it.” a boy had pleaded. He looked at you, you stared at his eyes. Was he crying? Why? You didn’t know this boy so why is he crying? Did he pity you? “Don’t touch me!” you yelled at him trying to push off his arm. “Please. Please keep trying to live. I know it’s hard, but there’s still so much the world has to offer.” You didn’t know why, but hearing those words made your heart shatter. You started crying uncontrollably. “I want to live I really do.” You finally confessed. “Shh I know, I know.” The boy comforts you as he hugs you from behind trying to not let you fall as you hold on to the railing. He was comforting you. You’d never felt this before, it feels warm. It makes you cry even more. This unfamiliar feeling was overwhelming, you didn’t know why but that made you want to say more, as if you were begging the universe to give you a second chance at life. A life where you could be a normal person, with their friends, their family, maybe even a pet.

“I just want to live a normal life, just like everybody else.” You cried.

As you realized you wanted to keep living, someone bumped into the boy. Causing him to accidentally let go of you. He let you go. It’s as if the world went into slow motion, as you saw him from the bridge with his arm out. You realize that you’re not on the bridge anymore. You’re falling. You suddenly feel cold, It’s so cold. You’re sinking. You realize that maybe the world would’ve been better if you were gone anyway. You would’ve died either way. So why? Why do you feel so sad? You try to swim up but it feels as if something is pulling you down. You didn’t want to die. As you close your eyes taking your last breath, you see his face. You didn’t even know his name. But you wish that you could’ve had more time with him. Maybe in another life, you guys could’ve been friends and not strangers who happened to meet on a random winter night.

ᯓ★

And there he was, sitting against the rail. He failed, again. The same thing had happened yet again, he couldn’t save someone. again. Finally, the police came with an ambulance. “Kid, where are they?” The police officer had questioned him. “They fell.” those words could barely escape his mouth. The police officer paged his squad to check the river that was underneath the river. “What’s your name again kid?” The police officer had asked as he kneeled to get on the same level as the boy. “Myung Jaehyun.” the boy had said with tears falling. He didn’t even get to know your name, you deserved someone who would at least remember your name. “Myung Jaehyun? That’s a nice name kid.” the boy looks down wiping his tears. “It’s gonna be alright, you tried your best.” The police officer hugs him. “Come on, it’s cold.”

ᯓ★

It’s been 10 years since that happened, and Jaehyun still tries his best to comfort people. And guess what? He finally saved someone, a young boy who had the same situation as you. The boy had reminded Jaehyun of you. Although it’s been 10 years, Jaehyun couldn’t help but wonder how you were doing up there. He hoped that you finally found peace. And you did.

authors note: oops! i accidentally dropped jaehyun angst ૮ ․ ․ ྀིა do you guys like it ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡ it's my first time writing angst so i hope you guys enjoyed it!! love you ᯓᡣ𐭩

taglist: @loserlvrss, @serejae, @lionhanie

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