#ohh this one was on paper! i like the shortcuts i can take on my phone but its crampong on the hand

[grunklestanbignaturals]

Weed that makes you kiss your brother

[luvymelody]

NAME : karasuno team , haikyuu!!

SONG : old love , yuji + putri dahlia

SUMMARY : the second years have been complaining about finding suitable jobs for themselves. so ukai says that everyone can take turns working at his store for experience in a retail job. who knew that someone would be coming daily? wc : 1.8k

y/n slipped her shoes on, putting their hat on their hat just above her eyebrows as she zipped up her jacket.

“can you get me that one ice cream!”

her brother yelled from his room, popping his head from his door to look at the girl who was about to leave the house.

“don’t get your brother that ice cream! eating ice cream this late will get you sick!”

“ma please!”

y/n left the house, shutting the door behind her as the last thing she heard was her brother pleading their mother for ice cream.

y/n originally was gonna go buy food from the convenience store a few streets down, but she took a small shortcut to it, finding a new convenience store she’s never seen before.

‘ohh maybe i should start going here..’

y/n thought in her head, walking inside the store as she looked at the cashier. he looked about her age, orange hair, doing his homework at the counter, there was also another one, a blonde wearing glasses while he pointed at the paper.

the orange haired boy looked up, hearing the door open and stood up from his chair and greeted the girl. the blonde boy just looked up, nodding his head at her.

“hello!”

“hi..”

y/n smiled at the boy, then put her head down, turning to look around the store to see if there’s that one ice cream her brother liked.

she lifted her hat up a little bit to gather food, holding it in her hands. she got an instant bowl of ramen, onigiri, ice cream for her and her brother and two drinks.

y/n went up to the counter, the boy was doing his homework while the blondie was stood up, pushing the smaller boy away from the front of the register.

“is that all for today?”

“yeah. thank you.”

y/n thanked, nodding her head as she opened her hand bag, trying to find her wallet. the blonde boy looked up at the girl’s hat, admiring her white hat, it was a brand he liked.

“nice hat.”

“thanks- how much?”

“2,910 yen.”

y/n handed him three thousand yen bills and waited for her change, her eyes trailing down to the smaller boy and his worksheet.

“the answer’s 7.”

she said, looking up at his face as he stared up at her in amazement.

“sorry-”

“really?! ha! she figured it out before you, stingyshima!”

“hah? what did you call me?”

“stingyshima! sorry, can you explain it to me?”

y/n blinked as the orange haired boy looked at the girl as the blonde haired boy glared at the small one, then started to bag her food.

"oh, sure. so-"

y/n explained it to him, the cashier placed her bag of food on the counter infront of her, looking between the two as he also started listening, understanding the problem.

"wahh! you're so smart! i'm shoyo hinata!"

"i'm y/n l/n, you are?"

y/n looked up at the other boy, who grumbled then introduced himself.

"kei tsukishima."

"it's nice to meet you-"

a buzzing was heard in y/n's pocket, y/n took it out, placing it against her ear.

"moshi moshi? sorry, it was really nice to meet you!"

y/n greeted the person in her phone, grabbing the bag and waving to tsukishima and hinata as hinata waved back excited, while tsukishima nodded at her. she exited the store, disappearing out of their sight.

"yeah, i'm coming. no i went to another store-"

-

the next day, it was practice, so the boys started changing in the club room, hinata was struggling to take his shirt off, tsukishima making fun of him as he laughed at pointed.

“hey hey! tsukishima, hinata, how was work?”

tanaka exclaimed, an arm over both of their shoulders once hinata finally took his shirt off.

“easy.”

“so good! we also saw this pretty girl- so pretty- hurts my soul.”

“well, there’s no one prettier than our goddess, kiyoko!”

“no dude..”

hinata said, then leaning in.

“she’s on par with kiyoko.. so pretty, i’m not joking!”

tanaka raised his eyebrow dramatically, tsukishima shrugging his arm off his shoulder and putting his shirt on. tanaka whipped his head to tsukishima.

“was the girl you saw… pretty?”

tanaka paused for a second, leaning into tsukishima closer so tsukishima got frightened, taking a step back.

“i don’t know?”

“ugh! you were probably going crazy, hinata!”

“what’s going on?”

nishinoya said, walking into the club room being a little late.

“can you believe that hinata thinks he saw a girl prettier than kiyoko?”

“what?!”

nishinoya exclaimed, dropping his bag and chasing hinata around the room until daichi grabbed them by the collars and forced them to run laps.

-

“no! bakayama- she was sooo pretty! tell me if you see her!”

hinata whined, standing infront of the counter which kageyama was behind. kageyama’s arms were crossed and hinata’s hand were on his hips.

“no.”

“whyyy?”

hinata glared, tsukishima walked up behind him after getting food from the store with yamaguchi, then hitting hinata on the back of the head then.

“ow!”

“let’s go, pipsqueak.”

that night, kageyama and sugawara were working together. coach ukai thought that kageyama would scare customers off, so sugawara could be a face that people could rely on.

“let’s work hard, kageyama!”

sugawara said determined, his fists in the air clenched in determination while kageyama matched him.

“hai.”

-

“get me this again?”

y/n’s brother asked, his hands clasped together as y/n narrowed her eyes at her brother.

“get it yourself.”

“nooo! come on, y/n!”

“you go!”

y/n turned around, starting to walk back to here room, then her brother called out in hurry,

“i’ll give you money-“

suddenly, y/n was infront if her brother, hand stretched out waiting.

-

y/n entered the shop, seeing only one person at the counter, a black haired boy who nodded his head at her.

‘like tsukishima?’

y/n thought, then turning to find the onigiri.

for some reason, they had moved it to the top shelf when literally yesterday night it was at the midsection. y/n grimaced, stretching her arm up to try a grab a hold of the onigiri. on her tippy toes, she reached high as she held the shelf near her head for balance.

‘who the hell put it so high-?’

then, a hand went up, grabbing the onigiri and being held infront of her. y/n went flat on her feet, following the arm to the person right behind her.

“is this the one you wanted?”

he asked politely, y/n blinked, then grabbing the onigiri out of his hands.

“oh yeah, thank you..”

‘is this the pretty girl hinata was talking about? she is pretty..’

the grey haired boy thought, smiling at y/n.

-

“she was wearing a black hoodie, a white hat- wait what’s the name.. tsukishima! what was the brand?!”

“(insert random brand).”

“yeah! and she had h/c coloured hair. so pretty!”

“shut up about that girl!”

“why are you so rude, bakayama!?”

-

"is there anything else you need help with?"

the grey haired boy asked, gesturing to the top shelves that y/n couldn't reach. y/n nervously smiled, covering her mouth in embarrassment.

"could you also, get the one next to it?"

y/n pointed up as the boy looked up, picking it and holding it for the girl.

"i'll bring these to the front counter."

he smiled, bowed and walked away as y/n quickly followed, placing her things down on the counter infront of the two boys.

"you scan everything and tell her the price after, kageyama."

the grey haired one muttered to the boy as 'kageyama' nodded quickly, sliding them to the other as he bagged everything. y/n didn't hear, looking around the store to avoid awkwardly stnaidng there and waiting.

"that'll be- 1,922 yen."

kageyama said stiffly, but y/n just nodded, picking money out of her wallet.

"see! you're a natural."

the grey haired boy whispered to kageyama, bumping his shoulder as kageyama was surprised, holding his shoulder as the other slid the bag infront of the girl as she handed kageyama two thousand yen bills.

y/n waited for a change, even though it only took a few seconds, y/n could swear she saw the black haired kid before, something was familiar about him.

"thank you."

y/n thanked, bowing and grabbing the bag and leaving the store.

"success!"

sugawara cheered, his hands in the air as kageyama nodded, lifting his arm slightly up to his chest.

-

"so, so?! did you see her!?"

hinata exclaimed, jumping and his hands smacking down on kageyama's shoulders as tsukishima, yamaguchi, sugawara, tanaka walked into the gym, waiting for the rest of the team.

"ow! boke- hinata!"

"the h/c haired girl?"

sugawara questioned, bouncing a ball on the floor to warm up,

"yeah!"

"oh, yeah we did. you're right, she was pretty cute."

"see tanaka-senpai!?"

hinata shouted, pointing at his upperclassmen, still a little petty about getting a beating from nishinoya and tanaka.

"until i see her with my own two eyes, kiyoko is my queen."

tanaka argued, pointing at hinata and then turning and launching a ball in hinata's direction as the orange haired boy yelped, dodging and running from tanaka.

"good thing it's your shift today, with noya."

sugawara said, catching the back of tanaka's collar to stop him as the shaved haired boy choked.

-

"and then suga said that hinata was right- and that she was cute! unbelievable!"

"what a traitor to our goddess kiyoko!"

the two were talking about the 'pretty girl' that sugawara and hinata kept talking about. the two kept talking, not hearing the front door open and two people came walking in.

"what are they on about?"

y/n's brother, tendou, asked, his hands shoved into his hoodie pockets.

"how am i supposed to know? c'mon satori."

y/n tugged her brother towards the ice cream section, him following behind her.

"wait shit customers came in"

nishinoya said, looking at the two who disappeared from their sight behind the aisles of food.

"shut up and act professional."

"you act professional- and you shut up!"

the two teenage boys argued with each other, then a bit later, hearing stuff being dumped on the counter, looking at the noise and seeing two people, a red haired boy and h/c coloured hair girl.

"hey, don't dump them on the counter.."

y/n murmured, hitting tendou on the arm as he winced, rubbing his arm.

"ow, that hurt y/n.."

"no way it did."

y/n and tendou conversed as tanaka and nishinoya started scanning the items, looking up a few times and then making eye contact with each other.

'shit, is that her?'

'they were right, she's so pretty..'

'are them two dating?'

they both thought as the same time as tanaka handed them their bag.

"4,958 yen- please.."

y/n turned her head towards tendou, as he looked back at her.

"pay asshole."

"i'm so nice to you and this is what i get?"

tendou rolled his eyes, placing money down on the counter.

"thank you- let's go."

"the change bro"

tendou left the store, bag in hand as y/n waited for the change. tanaka dropped the change into her hand, and then y/n smiled, bowing.

"thank you so much."

y/n turned, leaving the store and yelling at tendou. while tanaka and nishinoya turned to each other. nishinoya nearly silently said,

"shit, suga and shoyo were right.."

[weasleywinchester]

Not A Shrine

Eyyy Ohh! First fic for Mr. Marcus Magnet Hands Moreno! I’m excited to jump into this universe because there are just so many ways to go! This fic is mainly banter between (Y/N) and Miracle Guy (Whom I’ve decided to name Murphy Jones). Hope You enjoy! Also this is probably my last fic for the next week as I will be out of state for my birthday!!

Miracle Guy x Reader (New Friends)

Marcus Moreno x Reader (Romantic)

Summary:

You’re a huge fan of Marcus Moreno: leader of the Heroics, sword fighting, ass kicking extraordinaire. You got to see him once after he and Miracle Guy completed a tough mission, capturing your favorite moment between the two. But that was a long time ago when you were just an intern, now you’re part of the team that helps Heroics transition from the spotlight to civilian life. Miracle Guy happens to be on your list, and when your work partner points out your collection of Marcus photos and memorabilia to him, he’s dead set on embarrassing you just a little.

P.S. I think this might will get a part 2, because there’s just not enough Marcus tbh 💙

 “Shannon, I bought coffee, lord knows we’re going to need it.” You set her coffee on the desk, sitting across from her. She squeals in delight, taking a big gulp. She’s not going to tell you she’s already had a red bull, because coffee is just so good. She claps her hands together and takes a deep breath, practically vibrating.

“WOO! Well I’m going over the roster of Heroics, and it looks like a lot of them are ready to start planning, but most are not ready to actually retire.” She hands you a print out of the current full time Heroics. You scan the list, which she has already split between you and her, when you see-

“Miracle Guy?” you sigh, squeezing your eyes shut.

“I knnnoooow. I tried already to bring up the planning phase and he’s not budging. I thought you could take a crack at it?” She begs.

“Fine. On one condition.” 

“I already assigned Marcus to you.” She shrugs playfully. Marcus… assigned… to...you? Your mouth goes dry as you gape like a fish.

“(Y/N)... You can do this!” Shannon pounds the table. You’ve had a crush on him longer then Shannon has known you. And he’s been single for a long time, you’ve been single for a long time, you’re both amazing, you just need a nudge.

“The job ya, but… how am I supposed to focus if he’s so close.”

“You don’t have to be nervous, I promise to be nice.”

You turn to see the one and only Miracle Guy himself, one Murphy Jones. He’s got his signature smirk on his face, but otherwise he’s out of costume for once.

“Miracle Guy! What a surprise.” Shannon bubbles, shuffling some papers away.

“Shannon, lovely as always. Ms. (Y/L/N), I’m ready to talk retirement.” He gestures widely with his arms, as if he’s Jesus. You roll your eyes and lead him back to your office, gesturing for him to take a seat as you organize your desk.

“Ok so what exactly did you want to start talking about?” You turn to him, notebook at the ready.

“That I’m not ready to retire, and never will be.” He smiles like he just told you you won the lottery.

“Murphy, Wheels is ready to start taking over the family business. Which means you need to get ready to let go.” You laugh. 

His smile falters a little. Being a Heroic, and in front of the camera, is what he’s always wanted to do. He’s done a lot of amazing work that he’s immensely proud of. And the people of the world love him, he can’t abandon his fans. Although it would be nice to have time to teach Wheels new things, and actually do stuff with his wife.

“This is what I know how to do.” He states, looking at the floor.

“Yes, but now we can move those skills into other areas. Take Marcus for example.” You ignore the eye roll from him, “He’s technically retired from the Heroics central team. But he still works here, using his skills to help the team in the field. Teach, train, and coach from a distance.”

“Well, hooray for him.” 

“Murphy, You can’t physically fight monsters forever. Unless you want Wheels to have one parent. Why don’t we explore options. Marcus chose to observe from the main office, to use his highly trained mind to anticipate and analyze attacks. We could do the same for you.” 

“I don’t do behind the scenes.” He growls. This face? Meant to be in front of a camera, meant to be saving the world crowds at a time.

You hold your hands up in mock surrender.

“Hear me out. Maybe we can have you as a spokesperson. You love doing all the ribbon cuttings, first pitches at baseball games, kissing babies and hugging old people. Work with the image side of the Heroics, the press. You’re a fan favorite! That’s not going to stop anytime soon, and an easy way to do the parts of the job you love, and to lower the chance of immediate death.”

You take a sip of your coffee as you watch him. He’s twiddling his thumbs, trying to nitpick your proposal apart. What he doesn’t know is you’ve been researching possible jobs for him ever since he stormed out of Shannon’s office a month ago. You had talked to the press team, the board and Ms. Granada; everyone thought it was brilliant. 

“Hypothetically, if I agree to this plan, when does it start?”

“It’s just planning for a while. We have to go through everything with a fine tooth comb. There’s no shortcuts, once we establish a plan you are 100 % satisfied with, then the actual transition will start. But since the new generation are still very young, it’ll be a while.” You smile, trying not to look like you won the war.

_______

It’s been about two months since Murphy agreed to your retirement plan. And he’s been in your office at least twice a week, which makes you think he’s just coming to annoy you. Both you and Shannon have a bigger case load than normal, most of the new generation is the same age, so quite a few of the current team are ready to let them take the reins. You’re in the middle of Shark Boy and Lava Girl’s files when Murphy knocks on the door. You open your mouth to tell him to come in but he’s already plopped into the chair across from you.

“Moreno said he’s doing all of his planning via email.” Murphy states, slightly annoyed.

“Well good afternoon to you too.” You raise your eyebrow at him.

“I never got that option.”

“Like you would give up the opportunity to harass me in person.” You laugh, turning back to your paperwork. He frowns at you as your reach to grab something from your bookshelf. He wouldn’t say harass… more like friendly banter. That’s what you two were by now right? Friends?

“Well you’re never going to get him to notice you if you don’t actually meet in person.” He smirks, that should get your full attention.

You read the same line about Shark Boy’s request to be able to swim at the aquarium three times before your brain processes what Murphy just said. 

“What.” You blink, slowly looking up at him.

“You, Moreno, meet.” He claps his hands together, a cheshire grin spreading across his face.

“You talked to Shannon.” You grit your teeth. 

“That, and when she mentioned your shrine...”

“It’s not a shrine.” You clench your jaw. You want to punch Miracle Guy in his miracle face, but it would only hurt you and make him laugh.

“You have a collection of photos, limited edition merch and even a few newspaper clippings about the guy. It’s a shrine.”

“Not a shrine!”

“Anyways, I noticed you didn’t have anything signed by him. So, get him in your office!” Murphy throws his hands in the air, exasperated. You mentioned Marcus constantly, and Murphy can’t stand the guy on a good day. But oh man when the shire was mentioned, that meant he could tease the heck out of you.

“I’m going to kill both of you.” You put your head in your hands, taking a deep breath. You can’t hurt him, it’ll only end badly for you.

“Well that’s a bit harsh. I thought I was an excellent retired Heroic.”

You can hear the smile, but it’s not Murphy talking. You peak from behind your fingers to see Marcus Moreno standing in your doorway. You shift your eyes to Murphy, his stupid smirk on his stupid face.

“Mr. Moreno, I didn’t realize you were coming by.” You smile, sitting up straight. You hope he can’t hear how fast your heart is beating.

“Since when do you call him mister? How come you don’t call me mister?” Murphy says, feigning outrage. He can see the steam shooting out of your ears. Perfect, his suspicions that you had a Class A crush were correct.

“Mr. Jones, our meeting is over.” You answer. He grumbles while he stands; as he passes Marcus  you swear you hear him say, she’s a very big fan.

“Mr. Moreno-”

“Marcus, please.” He smiles, sitting in the chair Murphy just vacated. God, his smile… you could stare at him all day.

“Ok. Marcus, what can I help you with today?” You bring out his file, everything neatly organized and prepared. Unlike all the other files you’re working through, which have sticky notes and scraps of paper that you scrawled on sticking out from every angle.

“I just wanted to make sure everything was still going ok; since I was switched from Shannon’s roster to yours.” Not that he minded. Shannon is great, but something about the way you talk to him over email and the phone is... different. He always wants to keep talking to you, but he’s not sure how to jump from retirement talk to more personal stuff. And then Murphy showed him a super cute picture of you and he felt things he hasn’t felt in a long time.

“Oh, uh, ya everything is still on track. Shannon just had some… other cases that became more complex than we originally thought. Plus she’s making me deal with Miracle Guy, so my reward is you.” And you immediately regret the last part. Oh god, now he thinks you’re weird.

“I mean... your plan is pretty much done, so simple case.”

“Good. I guess it helps to get a head start.” He laughs. 

“That it does. I’m also handling Missy’s transition into fill time Heroic, which is also very much on track. Father like daughter.”

He smiles, a far away look in his eyes. He's so proud of her. She’s strong, brave and every bit just like her mother, and him. He’s glad you're helping her, you’ve already helped him so much.

“I’m glad to hear that. Well, I don’t have anything new to add, so...” He stands from his seat, as do you. He wishes he would have stayed seated, asked you about your day or if you wanted to take a walk with him. 

“Uh ya, I’ll let you know if there’s any changes or if I have questions...” You look just past his arm to see both Murphy and Shannon waving their arms like idiots. Shannon is gesturing writing on a piece of paper, and then pointing at Marcus. Murphy is mouthing ‘ask for his number’ while folding his hand into a telephone shape and holding it to his ear. 

“Is there something on my arm?” Marcus looks down, moving his gaze to try and look behind. You quickly grab his bicep, which is very firm, and you both freeze.

“No, just looked like there was a hair, but I don’t think it’s there anymore.” You stammer. He gives you a look, and you realize your hand is still touching him; you quickly let go and gesture to the door. When his back is turned you swat your hand at your friends, telling them to go away.

“I’ll tell Missy you said hello?” He smiles at you.

“Ya, that would be great.” You smile back. He waves and walks down the hall to the elevator. You let out a long breath, going back into your office and collapsing into your chair. “Did you have him sign anything?!” Shannon squeals as Murphy asks “Did you ask for his number?” 

“You two need to stop.” You mumble, rubbing your eyes.

“You literally had him in the palm of your hand.” Murphy snickers as Shannon nods furiously.

“Look, I’m his retirement planner. And he’s probably not looking to date anyone. I’m here to do my job, as a retirement planner.” You shake your head at them both.

They share a look and Shannon goes back to her office. Murphy stays seated, watching you put your belongings in your purse. He was so sure you two would get talking, you drool over Marcus all the time and Marcus actually mentions you a lot. You tend to be the center of conversation between them, which oddly enough has reduced the friction.

You stand, opening the door and gesturing from him to get out. He gets up, silently walking with you until you get to your car.

“I think you two would be good together.” Murphy says to the floor.

You’re not sure what to say. You always thought so, but you also think you’d make a good match with that one guy from Game of Thrones. Also, since when did the great Miracle Guy care about your love life and Marcus Moreno’s?

“That’s really nice of you to think that Murph. But just because I’m ready, doesn’t mean he is.” You give the man a big hug. You always knew there was a kind person under all the swagger; and you’re very happy he’s now a friend.

_______

Two Weeks Later

“Alright. Shark Boy and Lava Girl are about a quarter of the way through their plan. Which is major progress. You said Blinding Fast is still slow going, ha, but that-”

“OOHHH MY GOOODD” Shannon squeals.

“What?” You ask, your blood pressure skyrocketing.

“I am SO PROUD of yooouuu! You finally asked him!” She squeals, clapping her hands together.

“Asked who what?” You scream back. She gives you a look, gesturing to your wall of Marcus behind you. 

“See I told you it would be fine! He probably thinks you’re a bit fangirl-ish, but that’s fine, you are working with him now...” She continues to ramble as you turn around. You scan the wall, your eyes landing on your favorite photo of Marcus and Murphy. It now has the two very recognizable signatures.

“So congrats” she claps again.

“Oo, what are we congratulating (Y/N) on.” Murphy walks in, throwing a smirk at you.

“She finally asked Marcus to sign her favorite picture!” Shannon claps again, her glee very overwhelming at this point.

“I didn’t.” You look between her and Murphy. Shannon frowns, now just as confused as you.

“I did.” Murphy shrugs. Your jaw drops to the floor, you look over at Shannon to see her face mirrors yours.

“I didn’t hear about any fights amongst the Heroics.” You sass. Murphy mocks you in response.

“Well, I guess I should congratulate you then.” Shannon laughs.

“You should.” He winks at Shannon before turning to you, “ I don’t remember that picture being taken. It’s after the spiro monster attack according to our suits.”

“OMG! You never told him the backstory that you repeat all the time?” Shannon howls. You roll your eyes, glancing back at the picture.

“It was my first day as an intern here. I was an intern for the director’s assistant so after the spiro monster mission I was allowed to be in the debrief. You two had taken the mission together, fighting back to back; it was incredible. But you two had sat on the platform while the director was saying what a fine job you two did. I thought to myself fine? They did a kick ass job! Except I said it out loud instead of in my head.”

“I remember that actually.” Murray laughs. 

“The whole day was amazing, filled with moments like that. Back when the team acted like a team.” You smile at the signatures that now decorate the picture, reminding you that friends always have your back.

“How did you even get it out of my office?” You frown, spinning to look at your friends. Shannon immediately drops her gaze, mashing her lips together.

“I had no part, and the piles of paperwork are calling me.” She bows out of the room, leaving you and Murphy alone.

“It did leave its place in the shrine briefly… but I wasn’t sure you would want the original print signed on the front.”

“That’s why Wheels asked for the digital file.” You laugh, he said he needed it for a project the kids were putting together.

“Yes. So That is technically one of three prints.” He takes a folder out of his bag, opening it to reveal a second copy. “I was hoping the artist would sign this one.” He smiles. You grab a marker from your desk, and take the print. You hesitate, you’ve signed plenty of your own art, but Murphy went through the trouble of printing these, just so you could have a signed one. You smile and sign it in a flourish. 

“Will it hang in your house now?” You smirk.

“Actually, ya. And if Marcus is a smart man, it’ll hang in his too.”

“What?”

“I got three printed you dork, one for you, one for me and one for-”

“Marcus.” You smile and shake your head.

_______

Paperwork, it just never ends. You’re up to your eyeballs in it, and you’re not sure when, if, you’ll ever get out. You’re ready to shove all of it into the trash and set it on fire when a gentle knock pulls you out of the stress spiral.

“Hi.” Marcus gives you that super adorable smile.

“Hi.” You smile back.

“I was wondering if I could entice you to dinner.” He nods behind him. Your brain comes to a halt, did he just? He frowns a little when you don’t answer right away, making you realize the screaming yes over and over is only in your head.

“Yes, that would be great.” You laugh, his smile returning. You gently scoop everything back into the folders, and let him guide you to his car. 

________

“Welcome to… I would say the best restaurant around but that’s not true.” He laughs as you pull into his driveway.

“Missy?”

“Is at camp for the week.” He slides out of the drivers side and runs to open your door.

“So what brought this on?” You ask as you reach to take your stuff from him. He waves you off, gesturing for you to walk up the pathway.

“Just decided to branch out my circle of friends, retirement leaves a lot of free time.” He unlocks the door, shuffling you inside. It’s been cleaned, like deep cleaned. There’s not one hint that a tween girl lives here.

“I can see you’ve already utilized the time, pre retirement.” 

He shrugs in response, setting your things down and walking into the kitchen.

“Before you get to watch the master chef cook, I wanted to ask you something.” He leans on the counter across from where you sit. You nod for him to continue. “Will you tell me the story of this picture?” He brings out a folder identical to Murphy’s, opening it to reveal the picture. 

“Of course.”

“And will you sign it for me?” He holds out a marker to you. You take it and quickly sign the photo. He smiles and leans it against the fruit bowl, the two of you looking at it as you recount the story that goes with it. 

And of course you don’t notice, but he’s looking at you, not the picture. If it weren’t for Murphy, out of all people, he wouldn’t have given a thought about anything romantic with you. Granted he’s not sure how ready he is for something romantic. But Missy is gone for a whole week, plenty of time to figure out if his stomach fluttering every time you look his way or say his name is something that is more than a day dream.

[gizoogletranslateshomestuck]

[A6I3] ==>

VRISKA: He J-to-tha-izzust some huge overpowered green freak. A tiznime travel'n poser, supposedly invinci8le so jus' chill. VRISKA: Snoop dogg is in this bitch. Who he be, whizzat he be, whizzere he came from, niznone of that really cracka. Anotha dogg house production. V-R-TO-THA-IZZISKA: What rappa be how we're go'n ta defeat him. VRISKA: That whiznat Tavrizzles n I hizzay 8een work'n on here fo` some time now. 

JIZNOHN: work'n on what? 

VRISKA: Treasure sippin'! 

JOHN: oh yeah? JOHN: what trizzle? 

V-R-TO-THA-IZZISKA: Yes, niggaz, better recognize. Ok, I should explain. VRISKA mah nizzle: There sort of a plan 'n motizzle ta 8eat English. It a three pronge' approach. VRISKA: Ill slap tha taste out yo mouf. A num8er of thugz out here in tha fizzle mackin' are work'n on different prizzay of tizzy strategizzle independently. VRISKA: Tha first be a qizzle ta F-to-tha-izzind tha lost gizzy of some alizzle girl. She sizzaid ta 8e one of the keys ta defeating him 'n some wizzle. VRIZZAY: Otha thugz be allegedly out T-H-to-tha-izzere work'n on thizzat right now. If you ask me, it sounds lizzy a R-E-A-Double-Lizzy 8or'n approach ta defeat'n him. Who knows if it evizzle true. 

TAVRIZZLE: (gIVe it ta me,) 

JIZZY: (stop that!) JOHN: (keep yo' hizzle ta yoself.) 

VRIZNISKA: Tha secizzle be a quest ta raise an army of gizzy ta challizzle him directlizzle in sizzy kizzind of hizzy 8attle royizzle, I guess yaba daba dizzle. VRISKA: Slap your mutha fuckin self. From what I undizzle, sizzle yahoo out there be 8usy bustin' thugz up. I reallizzle have no idea how that go'n. I usually just hizzy stuff T-H-R-to-tha-izzough tha grapevine. VRISKA: Real niggas recognize the realness. Thizzat apprizzle dizzy really interest me eitha. Gizzy file it unda "8messin'" as well. Seems a shawty heavy handizzle, not ta mention tiznoo slizzow. 

TAVRIZZLE cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: (G-I-to-tha-izzIve Me tha r'n,)  

JIZZY bitch ass nigga: (no from tha streets of tha L-B-C!) 

TIZZLE: (yiznes, yOu ASs,) 

JOHN cuz its a G thang: (dude, you S-to-tha-izzuck at whispizzle!) 

TAVROS straight from long beach nigga: (you sAiD you'D GizzIve it ta me,) 

JOHN aww nah: (i change' mah mizzy!)  

VRISKA: Tha thizzle prong be whizzay Tavros n I be 8usy wit. Tha aforementioned treasure hunt. VRISKA fo all my homies in the pen: Tha lizzle sez there siznome mystical ancizzle trizzle hiddizzle somewhere out hizzy 'n tha furthest r'n to increase tha peace. VRISKA bitch ass nigga: I'm steppin' it some kiznind of weapon. It sizzaid tizzy if yizzle uze it, or like, activ8te it 'n some wizzle, he can 8e defeated foreva. Anotha dogg house production. VRISKA: Tha nature of tha treasure be pretty vague, actually. 8ut tha fiznirst rizzle of trizzle hunt'n, which I'm admittedly just blingin' up nizzle, be that it doesn't fuck'n matter whizzay tha treasizzle be. 

TIZZLE mah nizzle: (wE had a deAl,) 

JOHN: (quit it from tha streets of tha L-B-C!) 

TAVROS with the S-N-double-O-P: (why Be yizzou sizzUcH a liar,) 

JOHN: (shizzut up. i'm ridin' it with my forty-fo' mag.) 

TIZZLE wit da big Bo$$ Dogg: (dis be noT coo',) TAVROS so jus' chill: (yoe Prevent'n joYful human sTYled matrimonY frOM messin',) 

JIZZAY: (yeah rizzy. lizzike she would evizzle say yes.) JOHN: (i diznon't even think she rizzle yo' girlfrizzle. i think you mizzy T-H-to-tha-izzat up!) 

TAVROS: Snoop dogg is in this bitch. (wizzy, no, wOw,) TAVRIZZLE: (yiznou wEnt thERE,) 

V-R-TO-THA-IZZISKA: Death row 187 4 life. Theze three gizzy are all ty ta tha S-to-tha-izzame legend wizzy I've uncovered clizzle a8out brotha tizzle. Legendary shizzay be everywhizzle out here. I'm seriously up ta my ass 'n legend. Hell, I probably evizzle qualify as a legizzle myself!!!!!!!! VRIZZLE: When it comes ta solv'n a 8ig mystery like dis, it dizzay hizzay thizzay everywhere we go, places be compoze' of thizzle collective memories of many different baller. VRIZZISKA yeah yeah baby: W-to-tha-izze've explored ancient crypts, networks of 8urizzle mizzay, dusty old tom8s, giant pyramids, you N-to-tha-izzame it. Hints a8out tha endgame be hidden all ova tha plizzle. VRISKA: Aint no killin' everybodys chillin'. Really, everyone pretty lucky I dizzied so I cizzy do all tha dirty work on dis. Let git real, no8ody 8etta prepared ta takes on tha treasure hunt'n dizzles than I be. 

TAVROS so sit back relax new jacks get smacked: (unhizzle tha treasurE,) TAVRIZZLE: (it prEcious ta Me, J-to-tha-izzUst lizzle, Mah beautiful GIRLFRIZZLE,) 

JOHN: Bow wow wow yippee yo yipee yay. (you be so fizzy of shit cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map!) 

TIZZLE: Nigga get shut up or get wet up. (we're 'n LOVE togetha, aSSHole,)  

JOHN: (there no way yizzay gett'n dis r'n.) 

TAVROS wit da big Bo$$ Dogg: (fUCk, YoU,) 

VRIZZLE: Nizzay that I'd have it any otha way. Dis jizzay sounds liznike tha 8est P-L-to-tha-izzan ta me. Why 8otha mess'n arizzle wit an army of ghostly dipshits, or sizzy shizzy mizzle alien whizzen you can go str8 for tha ultim8 weapon? VRISKA: Hell, M-to-tha-izzay8e I'll just walk right up ta him, one-shot tha homey n end it all riznight thiznere fo my bling bling. VRISKA: That how a real pro goes a8izzle 8usiness. You gotta check dis shit out yo. You takes anizzle shortcut yizzy find. Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn. 

JOHN: Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up. (i be go'n ta wish as snoopa hizzle as i cizzay that i wake up wit this r'n wit da big Bo$$ Dogg.) JOHN: (it probably magic, so i bet it makes mah W-to-tha-izzish cizzy trizzle in tha dogg pound!) 

TAVROS aww nah: (i doubT tizzy Frizzay frontin',) 

JIZZY n we out! (if i wish hard enough, that will make it slightly lizzle impizzle!) 

TIZZLE: (oh, yizzle bastARD, you be gOOd,) 

JOHN: (i think S-to-tha-izzome day i W-to-tha-izzill uze it ta propoze ta *MAH* girlfriend. what d-ya think 'bout THIZZLE, wize homey?) 

TAVROS: (noOO!!!) TAVROS: (gIMme,) 

JOHN, niggaz, better recognize: (dis be pathetic, betta check yo self.) JIZZLE: Chill as I take you on a trip. (stop grabb'n at me! we're messin' wizzy she say'n!) JOHN: (she go'n ta think W-to-tha-izze're idizzles, wizzon't you STIZZOP?) 

VIZZY like a motha fucka: Be you fucka even mobbin' to me???????? God DIZNAMN it. Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn. 

JIZZOHN: Death row 187 4 life. yes! 

VRIZZLE: No yoe not. Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn. Yoe squa88l'n wit Tavros n his loud shitty whisper'n a8out some 8ullshit. VRISKA: Cizzome on, guys. Be I really 8eing that 8or'n? VRIZZLE: I'm really start'n ta understand how my ancizzle miznust hizzy fiznelt sometimes. No8ody killa respects an important explan8tion!!!!!!!! 

TAVROS: Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect. (i've alReadY heARd yo' explANAtions, tHough,) 

VRISKA: Why be you still whisper'n jackizzles so jus' chill?! 

TAVROS: oHH, TAVROS: sORRY, 

VRISKA: I thought i told ya, nigga I'm a soldier. Sizzay to increase tha peace. VRIZNISKA if you gots a paper stack: 8oth of you jizzay K-to-tha-izzeep yo' damn H-to-tha-izzands ta yourselves, shut up, n let me finish mah story. Its just anotha homocide. V-R-TO-THA-IZZISKA: Tizzles with my hoes on my side, and my strap on my back 8weed-smokin' me thizzay treasure maps!!!!!!!! 

TAVRIZZLE: yES, TAVROS: rIGHT AWAY,

> [A6I3] ==>