#oh to be bobby hastings palming his shoulder

[3416]

"All 5 guys?"

Matthews gets a 10-minute misconduct (along with everyone else on the ice) vs the Sabres | 03.30.24

[indigomasquerade97]

Brothers Abducted

Chapter 9 – Reunited

 Sam blinked up at the human across the table. The man was absolutely huge, even by the big people’s standards. He was easily taller than Jason. Though, that wasn’t particularly hard.

This can’t be him, he thought. The man looked so gruff, and angry. Sam recalled the boy he had looked up to as a child. Even at that young age, Dean had had a world-weary look about him. Too grown-up for his age. But what he saw before him was far beyond what he had ever thought to have seen in his brother. This was a man full of repressed anger, trained to be deadly and efficient.

But those intense green eyes had widened when they had seen him. As if he recognized Sam. And deep down, those eyes were familiar to Sam, too.

Sam briefly glanced at the other hunter. He was much older, with a scruffy beard and an old, tattered truckers’ hat. Bobby? Sam barely had to glance around the familiar kitchen. He had spent so much of his childhood in a house exactly like this, between his fathers’ hunts. From what he could see from Jason’s hand, almost nothing had changed since his childhood.

He looked back at the hunter, hope rising in his gut. He’d done this at several other worlds before, only to find they were not his home. But he’d been around shifters long enough to know there was no such thing as coincidences. There was no way that there was a house so like this, with a withered old man like Bobby, who still took care of a young idiot hunter he, at one stage, was willing to adopt.

‘Dean?’ He said, leaning forward in the hand.

Dean blinked at the little guy. He was absolutely tiny. He looked completely at home, suspended in the air on a hand that easily outsized him.  He blinked again when he realized he had reached out in his stupor. He snatched his hand back as if he had been burned.

‘How…?’

‘Dean, I never died. After the witch did… whatever she did, I woke up somewhere else.’ Sam said, glancing back at Takota and Jason. Takota was half hiding behind Sam’s larger form, but he kept his eyes solely on the two giants across the table. Jason hadn’t looked away either, one eye tinged white as he regarded both humans. Sam gave them a reassuring smile before looking back at Dean.

‘But…’ Dean leaned back, tearing his eyes away from the small form that so closely resembled his lost brother. ‘But if this… that means I just abandoned you!’

‘No! You didn’t-’ Sam grimaced. He slammed his hand on Jason’s palm, not even looking back as he pointed down. Jason hesitated for barely a second before he lowered the hand to the table. He hadn’t even touched the wood before Sam leapt off, rushing forward to get closer to Dean. It was a dangerous move, if the hunter in Dean were to lash out, but he knew he would be safe. Takota reached out to try and grab Sam’s jacket, to keep the kid close, but Jason’s fingers curled in to keep him on his palm. His unoccupied hand, hidden under the table, began to glow purple as he readied himself for the worst.

When Dean realized the tiny guy – who just couldn’t be his Sam – had rushed closer, he rocketed to his feet to get back. His chair ended up falling in his haste. Bobby jumped back at the sudden motion, sure that the whole, amazing encounter would suddenly end in disaster for a brief moment. The little guy flinched at the fast movements, but bravely stood his ground.

At almost the exact moment, a shimmering purple bubble surrounded him, ready for anything. Sam frowned, turning back to Jason. The shifter still hadn’t taken his eyes off of Dean.

‘Jason! Get rid of it!’ He ordered. He was determined to show that he trusted his brother. He didn’t need one of Jason’s shields. Jason grimaced, and the shield fell away.

Dean stared down at the small man as he barked an order at the monster. For a brief moment, the memory a small kid giving him a scathing bitchface as Dean teased him resurfaced. Slowly, he reached out again. This time he didn’t retreat. A finger grazed against a tan jacket, and the tiny guy looked back at him. Dean wound his fingers around the small man, feeling the most fragile spine under the clothes. He was so thin compared to even his fingers.

Then Sam was rising.

Jason gulped, sharing a quick glance at the older hunter. This was it. Dean was teetering dangerously on the edge of acceptance and rejection. Jason began praying.

Sam shifted in the human’s grip, staring up at his older brother’s face. Emotions as strong as his previous anger and suspicion – awe, sorrow, disbelief, longing – fought for dominance. Dean gulped, holding Sam up to his eyes as he looked him over.

‘… Sammy?’ Sam almost choked on a sob, smiling up at the human. He reached into his jacket, pulling out the silver knife. He held it out for Dean to see.

And like that, any hint of suspicion was washed away. Dean smiled, just a little, and reached up to his neck to show off the necklace around his neck. Sam smiled at the familiar pendant he had given to his brother years before. Once it would have fit in his palm, but now it was a long as his forearm.

‘It’s me, Dean.’ He said.

Dean didn’t know when it started, but he suddenly realised he was crying. He held the hand with Sam – his Sam – close to his chest in his best imitation of a hug.

‘Oh god, Sam,’ He said, shaking his head, ‘I’m so sorry. We all thought you were dead.’

‘It’s alright,’ Sam called out, smiling as he leaned close to his brother, ‘It wasn’t your fault.’

Bobby watched the two boys with a fond smile. He had watched the two grow up, and had been with Dean when Sam had been lost. To see them reunited after all this time warmed his old heart.

He tensed when a hand gripped his shoulder. He looked up to see the boy, Jason, had moved to be behind him.

‘Maybe we should give them a few minutes?’ He asked, looking down at him, ‘I’m sure you got some questions, yeah?’ Bobby hesitated, then saw the small figure that sat on the boy’s shoulder. He was watching the brothers with his own smile, in tears at the display. He was completely comfortable with the monster, with no fears for his safety. He may not have been a little like Bobby had experience with, but if the small guy could be so calm with Jason, so could he.

The three silently left the room, leaving the brothers to their reunion.

 ***

At a nearby Mandimal post, alarms began to sound. The guard looked through the data, skimming through reports and camera feeds. He frowned at what he saw.

‘Got something?’ His superior asked from the door. He grunted in reply.

'Yeah, but I can’t get a proper read on it,’ he answered, flipping back to the camera feed. The image was sketchy - primitive cameras and surveillance being at fault - and only showed the potential threat’s glowing eyes before they disappeared off the radar altogether. 'It’s something, but I haven’t got a lot of facts to figure out what it is yet.’

'Then send a message to the closest available team. They can check it out.’ The superior ordered. The guard brought up a map to do as he asked, but paused when he recognized the name closest to the potential threat.

'The closest Oak is Quintuple,’ He called out before his superior was out of earshot, 'Isn’t he supposed to not be bothered? He’s on personal business, isn’t h-’

'Call him anyway. Whatever he’s doing can’t be more important than this.’

With a shrug, the guard sent the memo out. He caught sight of the screen in his peripheral vision and repressed a shiver. He wasn’t quite sure what the creature was, but he doubted it was good.

[damnedcrybaby]

The Interview; The Gentleman; The Lion’s Den.

Elijah had done up her hair- even pinned it himself, only stabbed her scalp a couple times. He'd chosen her dress, too, promised it'd be comfortable. Caroline's inclined to think they had very different understandings of the word...

"You'll just cheese like you do, you know, be charming, be a Darling--" the advice was whispered, near enough for any passersby to mistake the pep talk as any other sort of secret conversation, after lacing an arm through hers and happily leading them up the steps; he even pretended not to mind their slowed stroll due to the heels she's so unfamiliar with. 

What a GOOD big brother, he is!

"He's a real Gentleman, Caroline, and he'll adore you: they just want a face at the front desk, it's cake, you’re a right shoe-in."

"Cake's sweet," she hushed him right back, through clenched teeth, posed to shoot a smile up at the man dressed for a black tie affair-- took her a step or three to realize he was ‘only’ a door man. "None'a this seems very sweet at all..."

"That's why you'll be perfect, the perfect fit:" A tip of his hat, before guiding her right along to the stair case. "This'll be great for you, Caroline, you'll be able to make real money and I'll be just down the street, you know, I can drive you."

She’d prefer to be anywhere, really. Anywhere other than here. But: Caroline couldn’t bare the thought of disappointing him, so she faked confidence with a smirk: “I’ll try, Elijah, I will, I just--”

Outside the door, a slight pause, and Elijah took on a tone he couldn't possibly have known would have such a strong effect on her sensibilities: Sincere, Stern, a mirror image of her Papa-- "Just be your best. Do your best. Be polite, be good, be lovely, you hear me?"

She heard him, so she nodded. He squeezed her hands before knocking on the Gentleman’s door...

The men had been talking; discussing bourbon, scotch, cigars-- in fact, it had been at least five minutes before either took the time to acknowledge Caroline’s general presence: and even then, it was only because the Gentleman noticed her gazing about his office; “I suppose, from what I’ve heard, this sort of firm would be new to you. What could possibly be on your mind, Dear?”

And since he asked, he readily received: "What's lion taste like?"

Elijah tried not to turn his head to look at her, instead glanced knowingly up at the animal’s head, mounted to the wall... shit...

Unfortunately, their host bit enthusiastically onto the bait: "Excuse me, Darling?"

Her smile twitched, just barely, but stare was stuck knowingly on the King of The Jungle put up for display! TERRIFYING, he was, with those big marble eyes and sharpened teeth, set up as if he could bolt right out of the woodwork at any time; "The lion, did you... get it?"

"I did indeed!"

GOOD; she assumed her question should make plenty of sense then: "So, what's lion taste like?"

But, apparently not; "What a daft question--" oh, and he ROARED! with laughter in recognition, even swatting at his knee to imbibe in the apparent humor. "I do like her, Elijah, I think you were correct, indeed!"

The poor man was barely willing to accept the praise, still partially hiding behind his own fingertips: "I assumed you would, Sir, she's quite... a character, and she’s good at-"

"I shot him on a Safari, my Darling, he was right MASSIVE;" already, the Gentleman is digging through a drawer, motioning towards a seat near his own-- Caroline sauntered that way until she was just far enough to steal a curious peek at the desk. "A brute, I tell you, thank God I took him down, no telling WHAT sort of damage he could have done..."

The more his tall tale went on, the more Caroline seemed unable to piece together the puzzle: "Wait, he was in a VILLAGE? Oh no, had he eaten up anyone...!?"

"Caroline-" Elijah begged from his spot on the chaise, patting at the cushion alongside him, DESPERATE: "Caroline, c'mere, please, I think--"

Sound reasoning was interrupted by our Gentleman: "Oh, not yet my dear, was still very far from the village-- I saved them ALL from such a fate!"

"You did!" Cooed, as if she were an awaiting victim herself, admiring this apparent HERO! "Oh how did you know where he was- or what he'd had planned for dinner!"

"The guide, here," a photo album was laid out before her, and a fat finger pointed out a thin man without a smile to share- "he showed me where the lion was, AND even showed me where the elephants stay with their families!"

Confusion knit her brow, "E... Elephants?"

"Yes, Darling, their ivory is exquisite, worth a fortune, truly."

"Ivory? You mean their--" 

The word evaded her, so she pointed two fingertips and set them at either side of her nose to indicate her intent; which sent the Gentleman into another peal of laughter: "Tusks, Dear, they are called tusks: and yes!"

"Well how do ya get 'em off the elephant? Don't they need 'em?"

"You're a riot, you are!" And on in, he leaned, elbows atop his glossy pictures: "Just a true Darling, aren't you?"

Despite the convivial conversation, Elijah knew. He could see where this was heading from a mile away, had his face hidden, STILL!, only muttered a feeble plea once more: "Caroline, Sir, couldn’t we discuss the resume-"

Unfortunately for his attempts at guiding this meeting; the compliments had emboldened her, and Caroline finally took the seat alongside their Gentleman-- LOOK, SHE’S BEING DARLING, HE’D EVEN SAID SO-- the same chair he'd tried to convince her to claim earlier: "But, I mean it! How do you get the tusks?"

He rocked himself in so much nearer-- too near, she had to hold her breath to keep from gagging on his wafting cologne-- a smile that could be in the dictionary alongside the phrase: LEWD, printed across apple cheeks. "The same way I got the lion's head, you silly girl! Come now, you’re too lovely to be dumb, don’t play ignorance...”

Oh, but she hadn’t been playing, not at all: and it had been blissful: until now.

Caroline’s bottom lip quivered upon initial dawning; devastating realization poured over her. She stole a better look at the pictures he had laid out, particularly one with him standing alongside a fallen pachyderm...

Our Safari Gentleman wore white. Impeccable white: clean as could be, hardly a speck of dirt visible. Still wore white, in the next photograph, as he SMILED and held up a giant paw in two of his own hands... She could just picture the whole ordeal now, a scene from her nightmares; FAT, NOT-SO-GENTLE-AT-ALL MEN, SITTING UNDER THE SHADE AS SOMEONE PROBABLY BROUGHT THEM LEMON WATER, waiting in the shield of shadows: as a lion went about... lion-ing, as she guesses... or as a family of elephants basked in the African sunshine... but he’d be waiting with a shotgun, bullets to claim the KING OF THE JUNGLE; ammo to take down A FAMILY FOR THEIR BONES...

Caroline thought she’d be sick, playing voyeur to the death photos, sitting amongst a tomb of a poorly preserved innocent: "You killed them.”

Still quite proud of himself, the observation was avidly confirmed: “Well yes, of course.”

“And you didn’t even... what happened to the... the rest of them...”

“Well no, Darling, I haven’t the slightest idea, don’t be daft-”

... Caroline didn't even have time, or the capacity, to consider how indecent their proximity had become. Further: she hardly even noticed when his heavy palm fell on her knee, couldn't comprehend the bit of a squeeze he gave while apparently awaiting a reply...

But she'd never been so thankful for the thin barrier of nylons. And she'd never loathed a soul so entirely until this moment. Surely, though- she’d never seen Elijah move so fast before...

Watching her heart break before his eyes was too much-- "She's not anyone's Darling, Sir, she just has more heart than roar--" He practically tore across the room, feigning nonchalance, and used his own hand to swipe off that Gentleman's from her knee. "That's why we call her Caroline," tugs at his jacket, then her wrists, concreted the next course of action: and how he placed a palm on the small of her back to guide her towards the door successfully ended their very unsuccessful meeting; "speaking of, Caroline: I believe we've been here long enough..."

Elijah led her out with a tight grasp of her elbow, practically dragging the traumatized girl along.

He didn't say a word as they left that office. Caroline couldn't even bring herself to smile at the penguin-suited door man when she was glided right by.

THE TIDES CHANGED, SUDDENLY, ONCE IN THE SUNLIGHT: with enough haste and insistence to cause her to flinch, Elijah's hands came for her-- she wasn't quite certain what to expect; perhaps a swat for her behavior, a finger wag for her distractions... instead: he went to plucking out those awful little bobby-pins he'd so precisely placed earlier, even unwound the ties keeping her curls in place, until those unruly tresses fell as they have every other time he's seen her, in those loose tangles about her shoulders. Even further, he kicked at her heels with the tip of his shoe to indicate she take them off...

Better, now that she looked more like she had when he'd first arrived at her door step, instead of the ladies he remembers from back home... MUCH Better...

"It wasn't a good fit," Elijah insisted, as she EAGERLY discarded those damned shoes, with no room for discussion. Once standing on flat feet, a curled fingertip came beneath her chin, forcing their eyes to catch. "It wasn't a good fit: and it's not you, Caroline, it's him. You hear me?"

She heard him, so she nodded. She couldn't decide if she believed or not, so she sighed.

“And for the record-” Elijah tucked her up under his arm, “you’re not daft at all,” leaving those bobby pins and the classy high heels at the foot of the steps leading up to that high rise. 

GOOD RIDDANCE!

[the-body-eclectic]

strike another match, start anew (dean/cas, baby!jack 1.8k words)

inspired by nanny!cas running off with baby!jack. thanks to @lobotomycastiel for the idea and credit to @casgirl for blue eyes/baby blue.

If not home yet, please pick Jack up.

Cas reads Kelly’s message and sighs.

OK. he texts back even though he’s already 3 blocks from Kelly’s apartment.

He shoots Sam a text and, as always, Sam responds promptly.

Cas smiles to himself. He appreciates having thoughtful and efficient colleagues. Jack’s whereabouts firmly established, he gets back on his bike and cuts through the park, thankful that he doesn’t have to get on public transit at the height of rush hour.

He makes it to Singer’s Garage and Salvage in under half an hour, a little sweaty and wishing he’d forgone the chinos and worn shorts instead. Though the last time he’d worn seersucker shorts, he’d had an earful from the elder Mrs Kline about propriety and dressing appropriately, so he doesn’t dare.

He waves hello to Rufus at reception. Rufus is busy staring down an irate customer but he acknowledges Cas with a nod and indicates that Cas should head on back to Bobby’s office with a tilt of his head.

Bobby’s office door is open but Cas still raps softly on the frame out of politeness. Bobby’s sat behind his desk, frowning at something on his comically ancient desktop computer, pecking away at the keyboard with one finger. He’s got his other arm wrapped securely around Jack who’s babbling into the receiver of Bobby’s equally archaic rotary phone.

Jack looks up and breaks out into a wide smile. “Cas!” He holds out his arms and makes grabby hands.

Cas can’t help but smile back. “Hello, Jack,” he says, taking him from Bobby, kissing the top of his head and breathing in his sweet baby smell. Jack curls in close and snuffs into Cas’s neck. Bobby leaves them to it, having gotten used to this little ritual. Cas gets Tuesdays and Wednesdays off and also every third weekend - thanks to the custody agreement Kelly’s lawyers worked out - but being without Jack for those few days feels more like punishment instead of a respite.

Cas cards his fingers through Jack’s hair. “Did you have a good day with Bobby?”

“Poppie!” Jack bounces in Cas’s hold. “Daisy!” Jack points.

Cas looks at Bobby and has to bite back a smile. Bobby’s beard is threaded through with daisies - Cas hadn’t really noticed it in his initial haste to see Jack again. Bobby grimaces and rubs a hand over his jaw, dislodging some of the flowers from his beard.

“Thank you for watching him,” Cas graciously says instead.

“Ain’t nothing,” Bobby waves him off. “The rugrat’s growing on me. Dean’s out back - I’ll let him know you got Jack.”

“Oh, it’s alright,” Cas demurs. “We’ll stop by and say goodbye on out way out.”

Bobby gives him a knowing look. “Uh huh.”

Cas ducks his head. “Say goodbye to Bobby, Jack.”

“Mwah!” Jack smacks a kiss to his open palm and waves. “Bye!”

Bobby grunts. “See ya next time, kid.”

Cas smiles, hefts Jack’s diaper bag over his other shoulder. “Goodbye, Bobby.”

They make their way through the garage proper, Jack waving an enthusiastic hello at everyone they meet.

“Hey, Cas!” Jo pops up from behind an old F150 and waves.

“Jo,” he nods in acknowledgement.

“Come to take our little duckie home?” She winks and pokes at the bright yellow duck embroidered on the bib of Jack’s overalls.

Jack squeals, ticklish, and Cas resettles him on his hip. “Yes. I hope he’s been behaving himself.”

“Ain’t no thing,” Jo says, and walks with them to the far end of the garage, where most of the specialty work is done. “Yo, Dean!” she yells over the sound of Blue Oyster Cult blaring from the old boombox in the corner.

“What!” Dean rolls out from underneath a vintage Porsche, frown slowly melting into a smile when he spots them. “Hey, blue eyes.” He wipes his hands on a grease-stained rag as he gets up. “And baby blue.”

Cas bites his lip. “Hello, Dean.”

Jo snorts and rolls her eyes. “See you next week, Jack.”

“Bye!” Jack yells, bouncing.

Dean smiles softly down at Jack. “Come to take him away?”

“Yes. I’m sorry you had to watch him again.”

Dean makes a dismissive noise. “Ain’t your fault Morningstar’s a dick.”

Cas sighs, exasperated. “Dean.”

“Yeah, yeah, language, I got it.”

“Dee,” Jack echoes, stern and serious.

It shocks them both into laughter.

“Geez,” Dean says, “that’s me told.” He turns the music down low. “You guys heading out?”

“Yes,” Cas answers. “It’s very nearly time for this little boy to go down for his nap.”

“You pedal all the way here?”

Cas sighs, knowing where this is headed. “Yes, I did.”

“I’ll drive you guys back.”

“Dean - ”

“Nope, I’m not hearing it.”

“It’s a perfectly safe mode of transportation,” Cas argues anyway.

“Not listening,” Dean says, headed for the employee lockers. “Jo! Make sure they stay put!”

“I ain’t your secretary!” she yells back but comes over and takes Cas by the elbow anyway. “You want a Coke?”

“No, but thank you,” he says, resigning himself to the fact that he is unable to say no to Dean Winchester.

Jo shrugs. “Suit yourself.” She nudges them towards the break room and rifles around the fridge while Cas tries to prevent Jack from putting a straw he’d somehow appropriated from who-knows-where up his nose.

“Word of advice,” Jo says, popping open a can of Coke and blatantly ignoring the green painter’s tape with PROPERTY OF ASH stuck to its side. “You gotta put him in his place early else he’ll think he’s the boss of you when you get married.”

Cas splutters. “Excuse me?”

“Just saying,” she shrugs.

“Just saying what?” Dean cuts in from where’s he’s leant against the door to the break room, having divested himself of his work coveralls.

“How much of an asshole you are,” Jo says with a sweet smile.

“Takes one to know one.”

Jo smirks and toasts him with her soda.

Dean grunts and turns to Cas. “You ready to get outta here?”

“Yes,” Cas responds absently, busy with trying to pry the straw from Jack’s mouth. “I still don’t see why cycling bothers you - it’s a perfectly eco-friendly and economical mode of - ”

“Yeah, no,” Dean cuts him off. “You’re supposed to be the egghead here. Statistics alone will tell you you’re safer in Baby than in that deathtrap you call a bicycle.”

Cas rolls his eyes but allows Dean to herd him out of the garage. “Goodbye, Jo.” She mimes cracking a whip at him. He ignores her. “And how many of those cycling accidents were through the fault of automobiles?”

“My point exactly,” Dean says, smug, as he nods goodbye to his coworkers.

“That is a nonsensical argument.”

“Your <i>face</i> is nonsensical,” Dean says as he opens the Impala’s back door so Cas can slide Jack into his car seat.

“My point exactly,” Cas deadpans.

Jack makes a burbling noise of agreement. Cas spots the Bullwinkle plush that Dean gifted him as a joke at Sam’s expense and tucks that into the crook of Jack’s arm. Jack squeals in joy and clutches the toy tight, cooing sleepily at it.

He can feel Dean making a face behind him.

“Just get in the car.”

Cas smiles conspiratorially down at Jack.

*

Embarrassingly enough, Cas has been in love with Dean since he’d walked in on him singing Jack to sleep, his voice a low hum of Bob Dylan lyrics, Jack only barely past being a newborn staring rapt in his arms.

He wasn’t expecting Dean - and he doesn’t mean it in the corny romantic sense of not expecting to fall in love at first sight.

He’d worked out a system with Sam, Jack’s biological father’s long-suffering intern/PA/gofer, in the short months since Jack’s birth and Luke Morningstar quietly threatening to sue Kelly for custody. They used to text each other a time and place on handoff days - never in their employer’s places of residence, mind - and sometimes Sam even had time to share a cup of coffee and bitch about his employer.

Those were in the early weeks of Jack’s birth. In the succeeding months, Morningstar seemed to have forgotten that he’d paid his lawyers hundreds of thousands of dollars to work out this tenuous arrangement with Kelly’s lawyers. Unofficially, Sam was Jack’s nanny because Morningstar had just plain forgotten to hire one. Officially, he’s a young and promising intern who’s been told off enough times by the senior partners for bringing a baby to work, regardless of the baby’s biological father being a name partner of the firm.

Cas understands that Sam hadn’t meant to shirk his (unofficial) duty to Jack but, that first time, he’d been given the honor of sitting in on one of Morningstar’s cases at the last minute, so he’d left the baby with his brother.

For sure, Cas totally understands, standing there staring dumbstruck at the handsome man singing his baby to sleep.

It’s the start of a pattern.

From then on, Cas has mostly done handoff with Dean and has only seen Sam a few times since. It does not help his crush abate one bit.

Dean being amazing with Jack is just the final nail fixing him to the cross of unrequited pining.

Just like being a nanny wasn’t something he’d ever even in his wildest imaginings thought he’d end up doing when he’d run away from home, being in love with Dean is just one of those things he’s had to deal with.

Just like being painfully perpetually single, in his 30s yet still free-loading in his jet-setting aunt’s brownstone with his flighty yet pragmatic sister, being embarrassingly ABD for close to 4 years - he just has to deal with it.

And while he’ll admit the closest thing he’s had to a date in the last half decade has been Dean pureeing carrots and apples for Jack in the kitchen of the Winchesters’ shared apartment, there are some things he keeps just for himself. Like the idle daydreams of absconding with Jack and hiding away in aunt Amara’s villa on the Amalfi coast.

Neither Kelly nor Morningstar would notice, to be fair to his nascent baby napping tendencies. He’d shoot of his daily report and photo of Jack at the end of the day and no one else would be the wiser. Dean, of course, would cotton on but as this is Cas’s fantasy, he’s be able to convince Dean to stay with them.

But Jack isn’t his and Dean’s made it clear that he’s painfully heterosexual - so Cas is content to just tuck all that longing deep inside and only take it out in the dark of night when he’s alone in bed, trying too hard not to think about how it hews too close to his lonely teenage years, dreaming of happy families and making it out whole.

Mamma Mia-like au but it’s Kelly Kline meticulously vetting potential republican fathers to co parent her son but it ends with cas and dean stealing her baby

oh my god. oh my god someone write this PLEASE. kelly republican girlboss kline wanting to have a kid to appease her family so she goes through a list of potential dads, and THEN she goes through a list of potential nannies because there’s no way she’s abandoning her career for an obligation baby. this somehow leads to dean and cas stealing jack and her not giving a single fuck because again - obligation baby. everyone in this AU is insane but like that’s par for the course for spn

[wskent]

What about Bob? (pt. 4)

Mueller enters the club. It appears he has time traveled to the 1920s, the roaringly sinful 1920s. Women dance in beaded dresses with bobbed haircuts, men in their baggy suits. No one seems to see Mueller who did not notice the sign outside explaining that the club is hosting a themed fundraiser for Michigan Senator Debbie Stabenow, a true party-animal.

Mueller is offered a coupe of champagne which he takes but doesn’t drink. Everyone knows that if you eat or drink anything in the past you’ll be stuck there forever. Mueller is approached by Orrin Hatch who is wearing his usual off-duty senator ensemble - a red tracksuit with Adidas sandals and black trouser stockings. Hatch hurries over to Mueller, “You party crashing too?”

“What?” Mueller asks.

“Oh, I know this is supposed to be some kind of liberal themed party, but I love the gin gimlets they serve at this place.”

None of this information has made any sense to the sleep-deprived Mueller who believes he is either time traveling or still in a coma. He stares blankly at Hatch who doesn’t seem to notice.

“And I do love jazz,” Hatch adds. He begins to move his body in a way that could be described as dancing, but to Mueller it looks like lurid writhing. He begins to feel nauseous. He turns away from Hatch and begins to make his way toward a soft reddish light he sees in the distance.

He walks toward the red light. Mueller weaves by a gaggle of raucous treasury members, led by nosy-Jack Lew. Lew snaps his fingers arrogantly as Mueller tries to avoid eye contact, but fails. Lew waves, flashing his renowned three-dollar smile. Mueller scowls, stunned by Dianne Feinstein, who, everyone agrees, can really dance.

The red light grows in intensity. All-too-suddenly Muller catches a strong whiff of asparagus and glue on a hot day. It’s like a slap in the face. He grimaces, stopping dead in his tracks, knowing full-well it’s too late. “Oh hell,” he stammers.

“BOB MUELLER. IN THE FLESH,” a deep voice with a syrupy southern-drawl announces.

“Hi Rex,” Mueller says, moving his blazer, adjusting his cuffs. “Are those pigs in a blanket?” Mueller inquires.

“There aren’t many sure things in this world, Bobby, but those are pigs in a blanket,” he declares, gesturing with his whole arm at a platter bathed in red light. “Help yourself.”

“I’d rather not,” Mueller says, remembering the slippery rules around time travel. He looks at Tillerson and his group of oil weasels, fawning over the recently-freed Tillerson. “What are you doing here, Rex? I thought you would be getting out of this dirty, old burg.”

“I’m a big fan of chaos, Bobby. I want this race to be interesting. Stabenow is scrappier than my pet goat, Ramona.” Ramona, Rex Tillerson’s pet goat is a well-known figure in DC and Texas. It is impossible to know how far beyond these spheres Ramona’s story reaches. Bob Mueller met Ramona on several occasions and finds himself nodding in agreement. “Plus, I love a good show,” Tillerson adds, running a toothpick from one side of his mouth to the other, smiling menacingly. Helping himself to a pig in a blanket, Tillerson dangles it over his maw to impress Mueller. Mueller is unmoved, even as Tillerson releases it, gnashing his jowls and craning his neck at the same time, like a bear chomping down on a river salmon. The weasels approve. Mueller feels a tap on his shoulder and swivels around.

“Well, thank god you walked in,” Dianne Feinstein says. She’s bathed in sweat, no doubt from singlehandedly setting the tone on the dancefloor. Her tone is flirtatious. “Tammy Baldwin was supposed to play piano for this gig. I guess she’s double-booked tonight. I know it’s a big ask,” she says, wiping her brow with a palm tree-patterned kerchief, “but would you mind covering for her tonight?”

Mueller feels time stand still. He had sworn off the piano years ago, or had he given it up minutes ago? The MK-timeline makes dates hazy. If only he had a paper cup right now. As a man of discipline, Bob Mueller was able to systematically swear off all distractions in his life -- except jazz. He remembers reading an article in The Hilltop, Howard University’s best newspaper, that said Jazz music was not to be trusted because of its jagged beats. In an alarming turn of events, he rebelled against this editorial, embracing the unpredictable rhythms of jazz as a guiding light - a truth that would ground him.

As he thinks more about this, Mueller looks down and realizes he is halfway through Monk’s Nutty, confidently seated at a jet-black piano. Debbie Stabenow is suspended ten feet above the piano in a sparkling hula-hoop, spinning gracefully as red and silver confetti fall around him. There’s Gillibrand on sax and he swears he can see Sherrod Brown on drums. He leans in close to the keys and his fingers dance. Is he wearing sunglasses? He hears Tillerson’s booming voice “My god Bobby, you’re gonna set the place on fire.”

His eyes scan the room. He wants to see the man in the pink umbrella, but all he sees is Orrin Hatch and Chuck Schumer dip each other awkwardly bumping into other attendees. He dives hard and fast into the middle eight and the crowd cheers approvingly. It’s a helluva fundraiser he concedes to himself, pulling back on the piano as she begins her speech.

“HEY YOU, MACHINES,” everyone knows that Stabenow loves trying out new accents and referring to people who aren’t from Michigan as machines. “Time to explode your wallets into my bank account,” she remarks grotesquely in a pitch-perfect Australian brogue. The crowd is delighted and Mueller hears audible squeals of delight. He glares at Schumer and purses his lips.

Stabenow continues about the importance of keeping Michigan out of the great lakes, how small things should be smaller, and launches into her usual stump speech, complete with talking points from the blimp lobby. Mueller chuckles to himself as the shape of blimps are very funny. He shakes his head because it’s really funny.

“BOB,” Stabenow says suddenly, forcefully, emphasizing the curves of the letter Bs, “We are running out of time.” She’s staring directly at him. The whole crowd is staring too. The spotlight is on him and him alone. The crowd encircles him. He blinks vacantly. He tries to stay present, banishing the nagging thought that he will wind up in front of another unlikely district locale with a half-eaten sandwich in hand. He is tired of the tangled timeline and John Kerry run-ins. He misses the din of his office. He yearns for the field from his dream, far away from the district. He wishes---

“Are you even listening, Bob?” Feinstein is shaking him. He smiles, nodding. “We need you more than ever.” Even the oil weasels are nodding their heads. Orrin Hatch gyrates with needless gusto and the scent of asparagus and hot glue permeates everything as Rex Tillerson claps like Duffy, the beloved seal at the national zoo.

“I...I..I’m happy to help,” Mueller muses. “I...I just need to answer some questions first.” The room grows quiet. He feels it is suddenly very late. The crowd fades into the dark corners of the club. He gazes down at the checkerboard floor. It stretches infinitely in all directions. He feels heat behind his knees. He licks his lips and tastes vinegar. He reaches down into a bowl full of nuts and takes a handful. The world spins around its axis and feels a premonition, the future coming. He opens his mouth, absent-mindedly, taking in a handful of nuts. His large jaw makes quick work of them.

In the far-reaches of his mind he starts to hear music. A piano looping. A swell of a string ensemble. He closes his eyes. A cascade of color. All colors. Beautiful hues. A palette of deep, vivid colors comes into focus. The music grows louder. He begins singing along. It’s Over the Rainbow. Warm tones and a soft crackle. An old recording. The one from the movie. A familiar warble. Is that Judy Garland? He’s tearing up, looking at himself staring into the infinite abyss of Washington, DC. He sees light blue gingham everywhere. She appears in the middle of it, wearing, ruby slippers. She hands him a lei of flowers. He accepts them and locks eyes with her. In slow motion she says “Bob, this is wrong. I am the wrong one. The other one. Find the other one. Make haste. We need you, Bob. The wizard. THE WIZARD!” She screams. He’s confused, but nods. He reaches out to her and she disintegrates into a powerful gingham wind. Rex Tillerson laughs somewhere and the world shudders while Orrin Hatch tries out his new dance moves. Ugh. The room swirls around him and all goes dark.

Silence.

[theartofbeinganerd]

OMG!! I just finished reading your one night stand fic. If you’re still taking requests, would you like to write one for that fic? AU where they get to go on that first date as planned.

Thank you for the prompt! This is officially the first in my series of one shots, set in my one night stand AU, 1 Night (+9 Months), which will appropriately by called 1 Night (+The Rest of Our Lives)! Hope you’re all as excited as I am to be back in this universe so soon!!

*Set during the end of Part Thirteen, going AU before Jemma receives Charlotte's phone call

(Ao3)

-

Jemma was the perfect picture of calm, carefully subduedexcitement as she put the finishing touches on her makeup and outfit for herdate with Fitz –

At least, she was,until the sound of the doorbell ringing echoed through her flat, and suddenly,her heart was racing and her palms were clammy and she couldn’t quite seem tocatch her breath.

Which was ridiculous, of course, given that she and Fitz hadspent the better part of two years as close friends and almost-flat mates. Notto mention, either, that they had a daughtertogether. But, one little reminder that Fitzwas on the other side of her front door, waiting to take her on their firstdate, was enough to have Jemma forgetting completely about keeping her calm orthe fact that she had no reason to be nervous.

Nearly stumbling in her haste to get to the door, Jemmapulled it open to find Fitz standing there in the hall. As soon as his eyesfell upon her, they rounded with clear awe, his lips parting to let out anaudible breath. “Jemma…you…um, wow, I…”

Heat crawled across her cheeks in a pleased blush atstriking Fitz speechless, and she indulged in a little onceover of her own,biting her lip to hold back the appreciative grin that she could feel forming.She very much liked his whole outfit, but it was the tie around his neck thatcaught and held Jemma’s attention; it was the first time that she’d seen him inone since the wedding, and the last time she’d seen that tie was when she’d been using it to tug him along behind herdown the hotel hallway, and –

Okay, thatdefinitely wasn’t what she needed to be thinking about just now.

“Hi Fitz,” she greeted him warmly, as though they hadn’tjust seen each other a couple of hours ago. With a little laugh, she added, “Wouldyou like to come in?”

Seeming to be over his momentary loss of words, Fitzchuckled and followed her inside the flat, making a show of glancing around. “Niceplace,” he commented teasingly, throwing a little grin at her when she rolledher eyes fondly.

“Oh, don’t you twolook cute!”

With a much less amused roll of her eyes, Jemma turned tofind Daisy and Bobbi exiting her bedroom, Evelyn still held within Bobbi’s armsand a smirk playing on Daisy’s lips. Fitz didn’t seem bothered by her littlejoke, however, instead gushing overly dramatically, “Is this your daughter? My goodness, she’s gorgeous!”

He didn’t keep up his little act for much longer, though,not when Evelyn was squealing at the sight of her father, reaching out for himand squirming in Bobbi’s grip. With a laugh and a shake of her head, Bobbihanded her over to Fitz, telling her mock-sternly, “Now, no messing up Daddy’snice clothes, alright?”

“So,” Daisy started, crossing her arms over her chest andarching a curious eyebrow, “where are you two crazy kids going tonight?”

Still quite unsure of the answer to that herself (Fitz hadstubbornly refused to share any details of the night with her no matter howmany times or how nicely she’d asked), Jemma turned to Fitz beside her andgazed at him expectantly. Instead of offering an answer, though, he simply toldBobbi and Daisy, “Jemma will just have to tell you two all about it later.”

In response, they both widened their eyes and made exaggeratednoises of appreciation. Though, embarrassingly enough, Daisy shot a wink atJemma and said pointedly, “We’ll have to talk tomorrow then.”

Blatantly ignoring Daisy’s not-so-subtle innuendo, Jemmagrabbed her purse from where she’d set it on the dining room table and askedher once more, “Are you sure you’re alright with watching Evelyn?”

Daisy let out a groan of exasperation, rolling her eyestoward the ceiling as she repeated yet again, “Yes, I am more than okay with watching Evie.” She held out herhands to take Evelyn from Fitz, but he didn’t release her until he’d kissed thetop of her little head and told her that he loved her.

Once Jemma had given Evelyn a kiss of her own and promisedto be back soon, she and Fitz left the flat together, and she had to admit thatit felt a bit…strange. After all, theynever really spent much time together without Evelyn, and certainly not to goout on dates – but, that didn’t mean that she wouldn’t like to do it moreoften, of course.

As they’d previously discussed, Fitz took her out to dinnerfirst, which ended up being at a restaurant nearby that had opened some monthsbefore Bobbi and Hunter’s wedding. She’d been interested in going for sometime, truthfully, but with everything that she’d had on her plate at the time,and then her pregnancy with Evelyn, she’d just never had the chance.

Despite the short rough patch at the beginning of their meal,where neither of them could seem to figure out quite what to talk about whenthey already saw each other all the time and knew almost everything about theother, it went remarkably well.

When they left the restaurant, however, Fitz began leadingthem away from the parking lot, andinstead began heading down the sidewalk. Jemma was desperately curious as towhere they were going and what they were doing, but she doubted very much thatFitz would tell her, so she didn’t even bother trying. Plus, she didn’t mindthe walk at all; the night air was perfectly tempered, not too cold, not toohot, even in her sleeveless dress.

Something about this particular neighborhood was ticklingsomething at the back of Jemma’s brain, but she couldn’t quite put finger onit. At least, she couldn’t until she’d spotted it – the hotel which housed theballroom where Bobbi and Hunter had gotten married all that time ago.

How could she have forgotten?Of course, she hadn’t been to this particular section of town in some time, butstill…

Pausing as soon as she laid eyes on the hotel, Jemma turnedto gape wordlessly at Fitz. But, he didn’t offer any sort of explanation, justgently grasped her hand and continued leading her toward the building. Onceinside, he guided her through the lobby, then down a short hallway that she rememberedled to the ballroom.

Sure enough, a moment later, they stepped into the familiar,grand room, coming to a stop in the arched entryway. The lights were down low,and there was a string band in the far corner, playing soft romantic music forthe couples dancing underneath the crystal chandeliers on the high-vaultedceiling.

Finally, in a hushed tone, Fitz explained, “I drove by hereonce, and I noticed a sign saying that they had free dancing every Fridaynight, and I’d figured…” He trailed off with a shrug, then finished with ablush that Jemma could just barely see in the dim lighting, “I figured that wedeserved a real first dance to makeup for the one we shared at the wedding.”

With a sharp wince of embarrassment, Jemma easily rememberedthe stumbled, drunken dance (if it could even be called that) that she and Fitzhad shared, practically falling all over each other and giggling like mad thewhole time. “Yes,” she agreed firmly, giving the hand of his she still held a gratefulsqueeze, “we’ll just pretend from now on that tonight was the first.”

A relieved grin stretched across Fitz’s face, and he gaveher hand a gentle tug, leading her out onto the dance floor, amid the othercouples there. As Jemma stepped into his arms, she released a little,involuntary sigh of something almost like relief at being so close to him, atbeing held in his arms and surrounded by his warmth and comfort.

She dropped her cheek to rest on his shoulder, closing hereyes, and as they swayed slowly together, it was just…it was a thousand timesbetter than the one other dance they’d had together.

For a moment, she allowed herself to pretend that this was the dance they’d had all thattime ago, to pretend that Fitz had shyly asked her to dance after they’d caughteach other sneaking shy glances all night long. Knowing Fitz, he would havestruggled for a moment once they were actually on the dance floor, trying to figure out where to place his handswithout seeming presumptuous, and herheart would have beat unevenly with amusement and the beginnings of affection.

Of course, they would’ve fallen into the right rhythmeventually, and maybe they would have even danced more than one song together. Atthe end of the night, she would’ve caught up with him again, and fumbled overher words as she attempted to coolly suggest that they see each other again,and…

And yes, it would have been the more ideal situation – it would’vemeant that they’d done things the “right” way around, but… But, then they might not have Evelyn, and Jemma couldn’t even beginto imagine that any scenario being the “right” one if her daughter wasn’t init.

So, Jemma was quite content to believe that things hadturned out exactly the way that they were supposed to, exactly the way that shewould’ve chosen, if given the chance tochoose.

And, she thought to herself with a wry smile as she pressedjust a bit closer to Fitz and nuzzled against his exposed neck slightly, justto feel the way that he shuddered in response, despite how backwards they’dgone about it, they’d still gotten this dance. It wasn’t as though they’dmissed out on anything, not really.

After dancing a handful of dances together, Jemma’s feetwere aching in her heels and even though she’d resolved to stick it out so thatshe could prolong their date just a bit longer, sweet, observant Fitz was quickto notice and suggest that they head back home. She almost thought to argue,but it was getting a bit late, andshe reminded herself that there would be other dates (or at least, she waspretty confident that there would be).

Daisy was sprawled out on the couch when they returned toJemma’s flat, watching some low-budget horror movie and laughing at the badacting and awful effects. However, when they stepped through the door, shequickly sat up and turned the TV off. “Hey, how’d it go?”

Unable to help the smile tugging at her lips, Jemma glancedat Fitz and found a matching smile on his face. “It went quite well, thank you.”

Standing from her perch on the couch, Daisy brushed pastthem as she headed straight for the door, though Jemma didn’t miss hersuggestive smirk as she informed them, “Evie’s down for the count and shouldn’tbe waking up anytime soon.”

“Thank you,” Jemmatold Daisy, her tone pointed as she arched an eyebrow at her friend.

Daisy gave her a yet another very unsubtle wink as sheopened the front door and stepped out into the hallway, “Have a good night, youtwo.” And then, with that, the door closed behind her.

Giving Fitz a slightly awkward smile, Jemma stepped out ofher heels, curling her fingers around the straps as silence fell between them.For a moment, she seriously considered taking the opportunity that had beenpresented to them and extending the night, inviting Fitz back to her bedroomwith her.

But, she was quick to stop that line of thinking – they’dalready rushed things enough, truthfully. Jemma would much rather like to takethis slow and to enjoy the ride, as it were. She had the feeling that doing sowould only serve to make everything that happened between them from then on allthe sweeter.

So, she smiled softly and told him sincerely, “I had awonderful night, Fitz, thank you.”

Fitz gave a little shrug, sliding his hands into his pocketsas he assured her, “It was nothing; it was mypleasure, really.” Then, he smiled warmly and added, “Goodnight, Jemma.”

Jemma had to press her lips together to hide her fond,slightly exasperated grin – she may not have been inviting Fitz into her bedtonight, but that didn’t mean that she was leaving this room without agoodnight kiss.

With that in mind, she wordlessly closed the short distancebetween them, stepping close and leaning up onto the tips of her toes to findhis lips with hers. Finally, shecould kiss him without alcohol or mistletoe or the high of having created ahuman being together. And, just as she’d imagined it would be, it wasincredible and perfect and everything that she could’ve ever asked for in afirst (real) kiss.

She could feel Fitz’s fingers gripping lightly at her waist,bunching slightly in the fabric of her dress as his lips moved shyly over hersat first. But, when she pressed a bit closer and lifted her free hand to cupthe back of his head, sifting her fingers through his closely-cropped curls,the passion of his kiss went up a notch (or two).

However, Jemma forced herself to slow it back down soonenough, planting a few gentle pecks on his lips before breaking awaycompletely. She was determined to do things right, no matter how skewedtimeline of their relationship was, no matter how delectable Fitz’s lips were. “Goodnight Fitz,” she murmured, slidingher hand around to press briefly and lovingly against his cheek.

With one last shared smile, she then turned and headed toher bedroom (though, no without taking a quick peek in to see that Evelyn wasindeed asleep first). Once inside with the door firmly closed behind her, Jemmaleaned back against it and let out a burst of giggly laughter, pressing herhand to her mouth to muffle it.

[a-daydreamers-stories]

~So this is a Kozik origin story, song fic. Trigger warning- Drug abuse and Death.

Here’s the song- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a0NQbKRoUGI&feature=em-share_video_user ~

Merry, merry, merry go round

I don’t want to see you down

I don’t want to see you frown

Merry go round…

Look…

Summer day

Bobby and this girl would wake up every summer day

This boy and girl had nothing, they were runaways

Kozik POV

The sun came pouring in through the window. I groaned and wrapped my arm around you tighter. I buried my head into your hair to block out the sun. I felt and heard you giggle as my breath tickled your neck. I smiled and kissed it softly.

“Mmm you awake, baby?” You asked.

“No,” I shushed you softly. “I’m sleeping…” I felt you try to wiggle out of my arms and I held you tighter. You let out a frustrated sigh after a bit of trying. I chuckled and bit you softly. You let out a moan and smacked my arm.

“Don’t do that! Jackass…”  You grumbled. I put my head on your shoulder and kissed your cheek softly.

“I’m sorry beautiful. You’re just so damn delicious.” I told you and you giggled and playfully glared at me.

“You’re so fucking cheesy.” You told me.

“Yeah but you love it.” I said.

“Yes I do and I love you.” You said.

“I love you too.” I turned your face towards me and gave you a slow, hard kiss. You kissed back with as much love and adoration as I was putting into it. I ended the kiss with a soft bite to your bottom lip. You let out a shaky breath and opened your eyes to look at me.

“I’m going to marry you.” I said in a whisper. I hadn’t meant to say it but that didn’t mean it wasn’t true. I loved you more then anything, I had since our first day of high school, when we met.

“How about we get married when we both have stable jobs and we don’t live in our car anymore?” You suggested. I looked around the trunk of our car that we were currently laying in and nodded.

“Deal, I’m going to get a job and take care of us. I promise, Y/N Kozik.” I kissed you and then started getting ready for the day.

So in love that now all they wanted was pain and so it came

Never had a silver spoon present in the past

Now at last, the spoon is present and so the boy wet it

Told her bring him a slab, a cotton swab, and a match

And told her one day they’ll fly across the world and have a wedding

Like “baby I have a plan, come with me to this place

Baby give me your hand, now flip it give me a vein

Baby take off your belt, we’ll use it as a restraint”

She sees that it starts to melt, he reaches inside a case

Fills the needle with food, flicks the needle with haste

Brings the needle to her, she isn’t right in the face

The boy can tell that she’s scared, he says “I love you, okay?”

Then shoves it into her arm and says “how the fuck does that taste baby?!”

Kozik POV

A couple of days after promising to marry you, I had met some guys who offered me a job. Which wasn’t a bad thing, the downside of it though was it was a job selling heroin. Within the first week of selling I had managed to make enough money to rent us a house. You were so excited when I told you that, I couldn’t bring myself to tell you what I was doing for a job yet.

You were out looking for a job while I was out dealing. After selling, the guys I started dealing for offered me a couple of ounces to go with my payment. Curious about the stuff that I was dealing, I took it. When I got home you weren’t home yet so grabbed one of your belts and loaded some into my arm.

I kept it hidden from you for the next week and a half. You started picking up on the fact that I was hiding something though. You kept pressuring me about it and finally I couldn’t keep it from you anymore.

“Baby please just tell me what’s happening!” You sighed.

“I can’t, okay? Just leave it at that!” I raised my voice slightly.

“Are you cheating on me?” You whispered like you were afraid of your own voice. That made me pause. I never wanted you to think that. I couldn’t even think of anyone else, you were everything to me. I was never going to love anyone else.

“Fuck no! Never, baby.” I sighed and put a hand on your cheek and lifted your face so you were looking in my eyes. “You aren’t going to like what I’m going to tell you.”

“I love you and nothing will change that, Koz.” You said and kissed the palm of my hand softly. I took a deep breath.

“I’m selling heroin…” I told you. “I’ve also been using it.” I waited for your reaction. You looked confused for a second before your mouth opened slightly as it clicked.

“Oh.” You said.

“Oh?” I asked, trying to prompt more out of you.

“Is that why you were able to afford this place so soon?” You asked. I nodded. You bit your lip and thought about everything. “Are you in any danger?”

“Some but it’s worth it. If I can give you everything we’ve ever wanted then it’s all worth it. I’ll make enough money and we can buy a house and I’ll take you to England and we’ll get married. You’ve always wanted to go there.”  I told her.

“Just be safe, we can’t get married if you die on me.” You said. I smiled and kissed you softly.

“You want to try some baby?” I asked.

“Heroin?” You asked.

“Yeah, come on baby it’s a rush! Trust me.” I took your hand softly and lead you to the kitchen. “Take off your belt baby, I’ll use it as a restraint.” You took it off and handed it to me. I flipped your hand and tied the belt to the upper part of your arm. I sat you down in the chair and prepared the needle. When it was ready I flicked it and looked down at you. Nervousness was written clear as day on your face. I kissed you softly and tried to put as much comfort as I could behind it. I pulled back and looked you in the eyes. “I love you, okay?”

“I love you too.” You said and smiled softly at me. I found your vein fast and shoved the needle in. I watched as your eyes started to glaze over and smiled.

“How the fuck does that taste, baby?”

[Hook:]

Merry, merry, merry go round

I don’t want to see you down

I don’t want to see you frown

Merry go round…

Merry, merry, merry go round

I don’t want to see you down

I don’t want to see you frown

Merry, merry, merry go round

See Bobby had joined the army

Been gone for a couple months

she did anything for that feeling

But then she started that feeling, early morning she’s kneelin’

In front of the toilet look at her belly there’s no concealing

That she’s expecting a child

This woman is living foul

She’s only 20 years old

And hardly can even smile

Reader’s POV

Kozik had joined the marines a couple months ago. Cops were busting down on dealing so Kozik figured it would be a steady paycheck until things calmed down and then he would come back to deal again. When he left so did the free heroin he was bringing into the house.

The little stash that we had only lasted a week and then I started buying from the dealers that he was working for. I started stealing money and selling anything that I could to buy more and more. The more I bought, the more I needed. Everything hurt when I stopped using, especially the pain of Kozik being away.

I was so wrapped up in needing hit after hit that I didn’t even notice that my stomach was growing, not until I went to go load up and had the overwhelming urge to throw up. I rushed to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet just in time before I threw up. Once my stomach was empty I looked down and took in the growing bump.

I stood up slowly and rinsed my mouth off before looking in the mirror. My skin was covered with sweat and my hair was a mess. My eyes were bloodshot and had bags under them. My hands started to shake and my eyes filled with tears. I let out an angry scream and punched the mirror. Glass flew everywhere and blood started pouring down my hand. I barely paid any attention to it as I walked out and loaded up.

Ultrasound shows a baby that’s barely over a pound

Sold everything in her house just trying to score an ounce

News of her baby’s father was that he died in the war

Now that syringe is all that keeps her alive anymore

No mattress, so her and her child dyin’ on the floor

As a letter’s at the door reading:

“I’ll be home tomorrow. love, Bobby”

Reader’s POV

I went to the clinic just to see if I really was pregnant. When the ultrasound showed my baby, I began to cry. Kozik should be here for this, I shouldn’t be using, this whole situation should be different. I left the clinic and went back home even more depressed than before. I tried to stop for my baby, for Kozik. I managed to make some progress even with the withdrawal hitting me so hard I thought that I was dying.

That was until Kozik’s brother came to visit me. I had managed to clean the house up before he came. I made it like it was before I started using. He had knocked on the door and I opened it. I hadn’t seen him since Kozik and I took off when we were 17 so my eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

“What are you doing here?” I asked.

“Can I come in?” He asked. He looked nervous and I nodded. He came in and he took notice of my growing belly. “That’s… are you..?”

“Yeah I am.” I confirmed.

“Is it…?” He started.

“Your brother’s? Yes.” I nodded. He nodded and avoided my eyes.

“Not to be rude but why the hell are you here?” I asked. He took in a deep breath and then looked me in the eyes.

“Herman’s dead, Y/N.” He said. I felt like the wind had been knocked out of me. I looked to the ground, my head swirling.  

“W…What?” I asked. My breathing came faster and I looked at him, desperately hoping that this was a joke.

“Something happened and his ship blew up.” He told me and placed his hand on my shoulder to try and comfort me. I jerked away from him, harshly.

“Get out…” I whispered harshly.

“Look, I know how you feel. I loved my brother.” He said. I didn’t want to hear it though.

“Get out!” I screamed at him. He seemed to take the hint this time and went to the door fast.

“If you or the baby need anything let me know.” He said before leaving the house. Once he was gone, I ran to my room. I found my stash and quickly set up. Just before I stuck the needle in the sobs racked my body. Days went by and I couldn’t get the heroin fast enough. The only time I felt like I could breathe was when I was high. I sold everything that I could to get more money to buy. I couldn’t even keep track of how much I was using just that I kept adding more and more to each hit. The last hit I took three needles at once and passed out on the floor. I didn’t check the mail before that, so I didn’t know about the letter in the mailbox that Kozik had sent saying he’d be back tomorrow.

[Hook:]

Merry, merry, merry go round

I don’t want to see you down

I don’t want to see you frown

Merry go round…

Merry, merry, merry go round

I don’t want to see you down

I don’t want to see you frown

Merry, merry, merry go round

Knockin’ at the door but doesn’t get an answer

Bobby’s nervous, his heart starts to beat faster

He hasn’t talked to his girl in so long

She sold his phone for a hit, damn how he wish that he could hear her laughter

But his drug hit her like a cancer

And he forgot ‘cause he had left and cleaned his act up

Passenger seat in his Acura got a picture of ‘em kissing

Under the words “happily ever after”

Kozik’s POV

I came up to the house that I hadn’t seen in months. I nervously ran a hand through my hair and looked at the picture I kept in my car. It was us sitting in the trunk of it during the time we were staying at the beach. A random tourist had a polaroid camera and asked if we wanted a picture. We had said sure and I kissed you while she was taking it.

Above the picture of us was “happily ever after” written in your handwriting. I smiled and ran a finger over the picture. I set it down in the passenger seat and got out of the car. I walked up to the house and knocked. When you didn’t answer after a couple minutes, I knocked again.

I hadn’t talked to you for a while. The phone I had left with you went out of service a while back. I figured you were still upset with me and started writing letters to you. I looked at the full mailbox and started to panic. I kicked the door in and ran inside.

He walks into the house, it’s a fuckin’ disaster

Every step he takes his shoe crushes a capsule

Holds his breath, he knows what he smells isn’t natural

Looks down, it’s the body of the queen of his castle

“Baby please, baby please!!!”

“Wake up!!!”

He screams on his knees and he sees her hands around her stomach

Inside was a child

And realizes it was his…

Kozik’s POV

The house was bare except for the bottles of alcohol and the capsules that littered the floor. I gagged as the smell hit me, full force. I put my shirt up over my nose and kept walking through the house.

“Baby?” I called for you. I made my way to our room and opened the door. My whole body froze as I saw your hand laying on the floor. I followed it to the rest of your body and my stomach lurched painfully as I noticed how still you were.

“Baby please, baby please!!! Wake up!!!” I rushed to your side and shook you lightly. I kept begging you to wake up as I shook you

“Fuck! Baby! Come on!” I let out a sob as my hands touched your cold cheek and I looked down from your face to see your other hand curled around your stomach. It was a lot bigger then I remembered. I touched it lightly and it suddenly clicked that you were pregnant. I let out a loud and painful scream of anguish that echoed through the empty house.

‘cause a facade made a girl give her love away

But those were Bobby’s consequences that he had to pay

Love is pain

Kozik’s POV

I pulled your cold body close to mine and kissed your forehead softly. I just kept mumbling how sorry I was and how much I loved you as I rocked back and forth slightly.

“It should’ve been me… I started this… I did this to you. I’m sorry baby, forgive me…” I whispered as I pulled the engagement ring I had gotten you out of my pocket and slipped it onto your ring finger. “I love you.” I kissed the knuckle above it lightly and pulled you closer as I sobbed harder than I ever have in my life. I had lost my whole world and it was because of my own stupidity.

[Hook:]

Merry, merry, merry go round

I don’t want to see you down

I don’t want to see you frown

Merry go round…

Merry, merry, merry go round

I don’t want to see you down

I don’t want to see you frown

Merry, merry, merry go round

~Thanks to @juiceboxxortiz for editing! @codenamekaraortiz, @dolphingoddess81~