#oh i do so love tumblr's asinine rules about tags (not really)

[sheps-shepherd]

@caffeinatedpoltergeist requested: “Asch and Natalia, flowers, secrets, midsummer” 

Look the moment I realized this wasn’t going to be a nice little 1k fic like I originally planned I just said screw it and went with it. So I hope you don’t mind a 4k prompt fill :’) 

Title: the soundtrack of my summer (you’ll always be my thunder) 

Pairing: AschNatalia, with obligatory background twin!AschLuke sibling fluff 

Rating: T 

Tags: Canon Divergent Modern AU, Love At First Sight shenanigans, Luke being a little shit to show he cares

A/N: First off, “Thunder” by Boys Like Girls is the song that inspired both the prompt fill and the title. I highly recommend giving it a listen! It’s a good song. I can’t link it because Tumblr hates links now so just YouTube it. It’s there. 

Second off, we all know Tumblr is absolutely asinine these days and lately has enjoyed eating any kind of formatting I try to put in a story. So 1) if that happens I’m really sorry and 2) I manually put in page breaks to try and avoid unreadable formatting in that scenario. I know it looks ugly. I’m calling myself out so no one else has to. You are all welcome. 

Enjoy the story! 

----

“I don’t want to leave yet.”

“We have to. It’s getting dark. We should’ve already been back by now.”

“I know. But… We’ll come back here, right?”

“Sure, we can come back tomorrow. Every day until I leave, if you want.”

“And after that?”

“It’ll still be here when I’m gone, Natalia.”

“But it won’t be the same without you.”

“...Then next summer. When I’m back.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

---

It was another traditional summer in Malkuth. Even so far south of the capital, the air was still hot and sticky against Asch’s face as he gave the trunk of the car a definitive slam shut. He normally didn’t mind the heat - not as much as Luke did, anyway - but even he was starting to feel uncomfortable with the way his shirt clung to his sweaty skin and his hair stuck down to the back of his neck. He’d put his hair up the second he’d clambered out of the car, but it had only helped for the first haul of luggage. Finishing the third, Asch had caught himself eyeing his brother’s short hair enviously a time or two and wondering if it was finally time the two of them looked alike again.

“I still don’t understand why you felt the need to bring half your bedroom. We’re staying for a week, not moving in.”

Luke’s cheeks were flushed pink from the heat and exertion as he puffed them in response to Asch’s quip. “I came prepared, that’s all! I don’t remember there being any rule about only having one bag.”

“Whatever, just go bring it inside.” Asch dug the car keys of out his pocket. “And I get the shower first, so don’t even try anything.”

“What? Why do you get it first?!”

“Because I’m older, so what I say goes.” The car beeped as it locked, and Asch stuffed the keys back into place as he hefted the bag he was carrying higher up on his shoulder and started the walk back across the parking lot. He heard the rustling of fabric as Luke scrambled to grab the last of the bags he was in charge of before scurrying after.

“By ten minutes, Asch! That hardly gives you rights to boss me around!”

“And yet, that’s never stopped me, has it?”

Luke muttered something under his breath that they both knew would appall their mother to hear, and Asch was readying himself to say as much as he reached out to pull open the door to the lobby, when said door swung open, narrowly missing his nose. He reared back in surprise.

“Hey, be careful-!”

“Oh, pardon me-!”

Asch froze. So did the blonde-haired, green-eyed woman in front of him. He blinked, thinking maybe some sweat had dripped into his eyes and was messing with his vision, because there was absolutely no way that could be-

Something slammed into him from behind, sending Asch teetering forward a step. “Ow! What the hell, Asch, you’re taking up the whole sidewalk here!” When Asch didn’t shoot back a witty reply or even so much as send a glare over his shoulder, Luke must have realized something was going on, and poked his head into Asch’s peripheral. “What are you-?”

The way Luke went just as still beside him all but confirmed what Asch was thinking. And ever the little shit, he blurted out, “Hey, don’t we know you?”

“Luke!” Now Asch whipped around to glare at his brother, not realizing just how close Luke had crowded himself against his shoulder. The movement jostled the bag nestled carefully in Luke’s elbow, sending it to their feet and scattering its contents out on the sidewalk.

“Oh, shit-!”

“You idiot-!”

“Here, let me-!”

All three of them knelt down, gathering everything up before anything had a chance to roll or get swept away by the wind. At some point, Asch was reaching for a stray tube of his mother’s lipstick, and pale fingers brushed against his, too slender to be Luke’s. He looked up only to find those olive green eyes already staring back at him, and that unsettling feeling of deja vu washed over him again.

“Um. Thank you.” He snatched his hand back, lipstick tucked against his palm, and quickly stood up. He heard Luke gasp out as the bag still on his shoulder loosened enough to knock into his cheek on the way up, but the woman standing with him kept his attention on her.

“Oh, no, it was my fault you dropped your bag. I’m very sorry.” Her cheeks flushed. “Um, excuse me, but I need to...” She motioned awkwardly with her hand, ducking her head as she side-stepped around him and hurried off down the sidewalk.

Asch turned his head to watch her go. He did nothing but stand there, even after he saw her climb into a car, until Luke popped back up next to him.

“Wasn’t that-?”

“Shut up, Luke.” Asch turned quickly, yanking open the door and storming his way inside, not bothering to hold it for his brother, hoping to give himself a few minutes of reprieve before the inevitable bombardment of questions.

No such luck.

“But that was her, wasn’t it?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Bullshit, you don’t,” Luke demanded. “That girl from the last time we were here? Natasha?”

“Natalia.” Even Asch cringed at how quick he made the correction.

“So it was her! And you couldn’t think of anything better to say to her?”

“Luke, it’s been seven years. She probably doesn’t even remember us.”

“I don’t know about that one, Asch. At least I’m pretty unforgettable.” Asch hiked up the bag he was carrying again, hearing Luke squeak in surprise as he tried to avoid both getting hit and falling down the stairs they were walking up. “Besides, I barely saw her back then. You’re the one that she-”

At the top of the stairs, Asch rounded on his brother, forcing him to stay on the top step to have those few inches of height over him.

“Just drop it, would you? Before we get back to the room. You’re going to get Mother worked up over nothing.”

“Are you going to talk to her?”

“No! That’s not why we’re here!”

“Right, we’re here on another dumb summer vacation to try and convince Mom that our family isn’t broken beyond repair! Asch, I swear, that summer was the last time I saw you that happy, and we both know why!”

“Don’t be ridiculous. We were ten, Luke. Nothing happened. So shut the hell up about it, or so help me Lorelei I will knock your ass back down these stairs!”

It was an empty threat - mostly, anyway - but it did the job. Luke sent a glare identical to his own up at him, but kept his mouth closed. When Asch decided he was sure to keep it that way, he turned back around and headed down the hall to their room. A grumpy Luke trudged after him, but his brother’s mood was the least of Asch’s worries.

He was going to take a shower, unpack, and forget the whole ordeal ever happened. And then he was going to try and make himself have a good time on this dumb vacation until he could go back to Belkend and put this whole mess behind him.

---

Their mother had already settled down in one of the beds and was fast asleep when the knocking started on their door. Asch looked up from his phone.

“Who’s that?”

“Dunno,” Luke said, distracted by his own phone’s screen. “Maybe it’s complimentary dessert or something.” Asch shoved at him on his way up from the couch, not bothering to start the argument about which one of them should get up to answer it.

Whatever he’d been expecting when he pulled open the door, Natalia had not been it. She stood out in the hallway, wringing her hands together at her chest, staring at him wide-eyed as they came face to face for the third time that day - three times more than Asch ever expected he’d get.

“Um. Hello.”

Asch knew it was rude not to return the sentiment, but he thought maybe he could have a pass this time, because his brain was too busy thinking up all the ways he could murder his brother right here in the hotel room without waking their mother to bother considering what an appropriate response might be.

As it was, his grand gesture boiled down to a simple, “Hi.”

Natalia cleared her throat. “I… I’m sure you don’t remember me, so I apologize if this seems strange-”

“No,” Asch said quickly. “No, I remember you.” He swallowed. “Natalia.”

Her eyes lit up, and her shoulders slackened with relief. Natalia smiled up at him.

“Well, then it’s nice to see you again, Asch.”

“You too.” Before the oncoming awkward silence could make its appearance, he continued on, “Can I ask what you’re doing here? It’s getting pretty late.”

“Yes, well,” Natalia reached up and tucked a slip of blonde hair behind her ear, “I came up here to ask if you would take a walk with me. The hotel gardens are still just as beautiful, and I thought since you haven’t been in a while…” She gazed up at him so hopefully, Asch felt something twist in his chest at the sight.

“Oh. Ah, actually, I-”

“You should go, Asch,” came an infuriatingly sweet voice from behind him. “I can always stay in case Mother wakes up and needs something. Plus, you did bring in most of our stuff. You deserve a little break, you know?”

Asch’s shoulders got a little stiffer with every word out of his brother’s mouth, and he looked over his shoulder to give Luke the most acidic glare he could manage - Luke, the cheeky bastard, just grinned back at him, knowing full well he’d stolen the excuse right out of Asch’s mouth, and used his own complaints from earlier that day against him to boot.

Natalia, no doubt sensing the rising tension between the twins, cleared her throat once more. “If now isn’t a good time…” She failed to mask the disappointment in her voice, and Asch knew he wasn’t being very courteous by making her feel so awkward in the midst of his and his brother’s silent feud.

“No,” he said, turning back to her. “No, now is fine. A walk through the gardens sounds nice.” Her face began to glow again, and she gave him another smile, and Asch knew he’d made the right choice. She stepped back as he came out of the room, and with one last look at his idiot twin’s smirking face, Asch shut the door.

That was how he found himself back outside, the air a little less stifling with the sun setting overhead. The sky was orange, but the quaint lampposts lined throughout the gardens were already shining, and Asch had to admit, it really was nice. He found he really didn’t remember much of what he saw as he and Natalia made their way around, but he did recall the green-painted bench that Luke had jumped off the back of and almost cracked his head open on, and the large map of the garden’s layout in the very center where he distantly remembered meeting the very girl beside him. If he noticed that Natalia lingered there when they came to it, he didn’t say anything about it.

They made small talk, only slightly awkward, mostly just asking about each other’s lives. They were both finishing their last year of high school - she was older than him, Asch had forgotten - and had both been on student council. He played the piano, she was learning flute. He liked to cook, she could barely make a passable grilled cheese. He had his mother and younger brother to take care of, she was planning on moving into her own apartment after graduation.

“But aren’t you and Luke still the same age? Surely he can take care of himself?”

“Please never say that in front of him. He’ll do something stupid, like believe you.”

He’d thought maybe that had been a bit offending, but it made her laugh - a rich and warm sound that carried away on the breeze and made the twist in Asch’s chest pull a little tighter.

He was in the middle of a story about some stupid thing Luke had done a few weeks ago when he realized that they weren’t on Choral Castle’s grounds anymore. They had apparently long since passed through the hotel’s gates, and not only that, but Natalia had gone strangely quiet, no longer making soft noises of affirmation to assure him she was listening. In fact, she seemed to be looking around dazedly, like she was waiting for something to jump out at her-

Asch stopped walking, voice catching in his throat. Natalia continued a few steps without him before realizing he’d broken their synchronization and stopped herself.

“Asch?”

“This isn’t what I think it is, is it?”

Natalia didn’t seem surprised by his outburst at all. She seemed more relieved by it, if anything.

“So you remember it, too.”

“It can’t still be here. It’s been years, Natalia, someone else probably found it and-”

“No, it’s still there. I check every time I come here, just to be sure.” Asch didn’t have time to press her for details before she was suddenly stepping off the path they’d been walking, climbing into the brush. “The entrance is right over here.”

“Hey, wait, you shouldn’t-” But Natalia ducked beneath some overhanging branches and disappeared into the greenery. Asch saw a few flashes of her blonde hair, and then she was gone, ignoring his calls for her to come back.

He looked up at the sky; it had morphed from orange to a smokey purple. It would be dark soon, and they still had to make the walk back, and he’d be damned if he let her get far enough away from him and make her go back alone. He poked through the mess of greenery, trying to find the path Natalia had made for herself, and followed her into the brush.

He came out the other side into an open clearing, remembering at the last moment the dip in the ground that he used to always trip on, and widely stepping over it. Natalia was waiting for him by the stone wall that ran along the far side of the area, visibly pleased to see him coming.

“Natalia, we shouldn’t be out here-”

“But we already are, so we might as well have a little visit, shouldn’t we?”

Asch glanced down at the crumbled section of the wall, the debris from whatever had wrecked it long since cleared away, leaving an opening between the stone. An opening he remembered being ten and climbing through, every day for a week that one fateful summer.

“You can’t be serious. We won’t be able to fit through there.”

“Excuse you. I fit through just fine, thank you.”

Asch deadpanned. “Last time I checked, I’m a bit bigger than you are. There’s no way.”

“You won’t know unless you try.”

“Natalia, it’s late. We’re already going to have to walk back in the dark. We shouldn’t waste anymore time.”

“Fine, then you can go back to the hotel if you’d like. I’d like to visit this place again.” Asch moved to get to her, but she was quicker, crouching down and sliding into the opening feet-first, pushing herself through - she was too far in by the time he reached the wall to try and pull her out.

“Natalia!” he called out, but there was no response. She was really going to make him go in after her. Perfect.

Sighing, Asch crouched down to get a look at the opening. It would be a tight squeeze for sure, but if he wiggled enough, he could probably manage to make it. At least, he hoped he would. Exhaling a curse, Asch ducked beneath the stone and began to climb through.

It was definitely a tight squeeze - it was just barely wide enough to fit his shoulders, and he had to catch himself on his hands to pull his legs through once he’d wormed his top half out. But once he was fully through and back on his feet, he looked up and-

Oh.

Oh, he’d forgotten how beautiful this place was. Not because he didn’t remember, but because his memories didn’t do it justice.

Their secret garden, they’d called it. A vast open field completely covered in flowers and plants wherever there was soil to be found. There were a few boulders to break up the floral monotony, and at the very end of it all was the cliff that overlooked the sea they used to hang their feet off of. The sound of rushing water and crashing waves filled his ears, and while the smell of pollen and flower petals was overwhelming, it sparked more memories in Asch’s head, reminding him of how everything had been the last time he was here.

Natalia had made herself comfortable in a certain patch of flowers, gently running her hands along the plants that surrounded her. She was watching him quietly, letting him have his moment before softly saying, “Welcome back.”

Asch stared at her for a long while before making his way over to her. “You’ve been back here, then,” he murmured, sitting himself down beside her. “Before now.”

She hummed softly, looking down at the blossoms around her knees. “Every summer since you left,” she admitted. “Though I gave up on waiting for you quite a while ago.”

Asch had known the topic would be brought up eventually. He hadn’t expected it to feel like such a blow to the chest to hear it, though.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I suppose it was silly to place such a heavy burden onto you when we were children. There were many things we had no control over, back then.” Her gaze flicked up, and she reached for him. “You have leaves stuck in your hair.”

Her fingers gently slipped through the long red strands of his hair, pulling the bits of foliage stuck there free with crinkling sounds that echoed loudly in his ears. Asch let her fuss over him, finding a blooming white flower nestled in the field in front of him to rest his eyes on.

“Luke got sick,” he said quietly. Natalia’s fingers faltered, pulled a little too hard on his hair and sent a tiny spark of pain down his neck. “My mother, she wanted to move to Belkend, so we’d be closer to his doctors in case something happened. My father refused to leave Baticul, because of his job and whatever the hell other excuses he made. So Mother packed Luke and I up herself and we left. And then, when the divorce went through…” He shrugged. “We just stayed there.”

“I remember trying to find you in Baticul for a while. You’d told me you lived there. Though I’m sure I would have ended up empty-handed, even if you had still been in the city.” Asch nodded dazedly. “...Is Luke okay now?”

“He’s fine. He’ll be on medication for the rest of his life, but at least it’ll be a long one.”

“I had no idea he’d ever been so sick. You truly can’t tell, he seemed perfectly normal when we spoke today-” One of Natalia’s hands flew from his hair to her mouth. “Ah, I mean-!”

Asch gave her a small smile. “Don’t worry about it. Luke’s not half as sneaky as he likes to think he is. I knew he had something to do with this the moment I saw you outside my door.”

Even in the fading light, he could see the blush that painted Natalia’s cheeks. “I-I’m sorry about this morning. My father and I come back here every summer, I wasn’t expecting to suddenly see you here… I wasn’t even sure I really had seen you, until Luke came and talked to me.”

“Trust me, the feeling was mutual. I think a part of me still thinks I’m dreaming this right now.”

“Well, if this is a dream, I’m not sure I ever want to wake up.” She smiled bashfully at him. “I didn’t think I’d ever see you again. I’d thought you’d forgotten about me after a while.”

Asch didn’t know what possessed him to bring his hand to her cheek, but he did, smoothing his thumb along her pinkened skin. Natalia barely flinched at the contact, and more so out of surprise than discomfort - the space between them was darkening fast. “No,” he said softly. “Never.”

Natalia reached up to rest her hand over his, her fingers slipping easily into the spaces left between his. “I’m glad,” she whispered. “This place never did feel the same without you.”

It felt natural to pull her close, like there was absolutely nothing else he could do besides kiss her. Her lips were warm against his in the cooling night air, chasing away the damp chill of the earth beneath them that had sank into his skin, untwisting the mess of denial and uncertainty that had knotted itself into his chest.

“Sorry,” he mumbled when he pulled back, only as much as he had to, “I didn’t-”

“Please don’t be.” She shifted closer to him, slid her arms around his neck. “If you hadn’t done it soon, I would have done it myself.” He had to chuckle at that, and she beamed, and her lips tasted so much better when she was smiling.

---

They stayed in the garden for a while longer, enjoying the privacy and making up for lost time. But when Asch’s phone told them it was well past midnight not counting the walk back they still had ahead of them, he finally convinced Natalia it was time to go. Back through the stone opening they went, Natalia giggling as she watched Asch worm his way through again, and that led to the first of many detours - detours that made the ten minute walk back to Choral Castle another ten minutes longer, but Asch found he really didn’t mind. Considering it was Natalia starting most of them, he figured she didn’t either.

He walked her to her room when they finally arrived back at the hotel, standing in the hallway outside her door with their fingers still laced together.

“Would you like to have breakfast with me tomorrow?” she asked him. “I’d love to meet your mother, and catch up with Luke.”

“Tomorrow.” He gave her hands a squeeze. “Sounds like a good place to start.”

Natalia’s smile was bright in the dimmed light of the hallway as Asch kissed her goodnight.

When he climbed up the stairs to head back to his own room, he found Luke sitting outside the door waiting for him. His brother scrambled to his feet when he saw him coming.

“I didn’t wanna call and interrupt anything,” he explained, “but I also didn’t expect you to stay out so long and I was getting kinda worried and…” Luke shrugged helplessly. “How did it go?”

“Next time I tell you to drop something, drop it, you hear me?” Luke’s face fell, and because Asch was in a particularly good mood, he decided he’d let his little twin off the hook this time around. “She wants to have breakfast with you and Mother tomorrow morning.”

Luke’s expression did a complete one-eighty as Asch stepped around him to get to the door. “So it went well then?”

“It was fine, no thanks to you.”

“Well tell me what happened!”

“No way. Mind your own business.”

“Asch! You know I’ll just use our twin telepathy on you if you don’t tell me!”

“Luke, how many times do I have to tell you, we aren’t psychic just because we’re twins.”

And as Luke went off on his latest tangent, Asch walked into their room with his phone nestled in his pocket - and Natalia’s number tucked safely away inside.

---

“You know, we could take Luke here one day before you leave, if you’d like.”

“I share everything with Luke. This can be our little secret, okay?”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

[cryptid-crusader]

My Tumblr History (feat. a LOT of rambling, I apologize)

I’ve been on Tumblr 9 years. I came to Tumblr from Xanga (which IDK if that’s even still a thing or not) after being thoroughly obsessed with latter for about 4 or so years. Xanga was much more of a typical blog blog, and though I interacted with far less people on it, those few I did became honest to god friends that I still think about to this day. Though, as years past, my few friends began to drop off one by one from the site and I found myself enjoying it much less once they were gone. Eventually, I left too.

A few months later, I decided to join Tumblr. It was still a fairly new site in 2010 when I had joined, and I had only heard a few things here and there around the internet before I decided to check it out myself. When I first started, I used this site a lot like I used Xanga and basically had it exclusively as an internet journal to talk about life and nerdy shit and the like (I remember even thinking the reblog option was dumb because why not just make your own content? Why reblog other peoples stuff? loooool) and also did a lot of those writing daily challenges. Do you guys remember those? I loved them. Anyway...

Needless to say as time went on and I got older and followed more people and gained more followers (some of you have been here from very early on and for that I am incredibly thankful) as dweeby as this may sound, I really grew as a person. God, I remember 9 years ago I would sometimes post uncredited art or really insensitive, not funny at all, “jokes” because I honestly didn’t see a problem with them (and the only reason I really remember these awful things is occasionally once in a blue moon random people would find them in the bowels of my blog and like them and I would shudder and delete them). I kinda started Tumblr as this young social media doofus that, again as cheesy as it sounds, learned a lot and grew from my experience here. I would never dream of posting uncredited art now, and those “jokes” make me want to vomit. I learned a lot about social issues through this blog and it also helped me open up and learn about my sexuality. I got to see a broader world view from all different walks of life here (which was incredibly refreshing after growing up in a very close knit predominately white republican community) , and met some fantastic humans I’m blessed to have interacted with and become their friend. I never would have met them without this site!

Not to mention just like... all the cool shit. There are SO many talented people on Tumblr. So much beautiful art, fantastic writing, and just all round hilarious and interesting humans that I loved to get even a small peak into their lives and learn about them and what they like and do for fun. I’ve picked up hobbies through this site, joined fandoms through this site, made friends, laughed endlessly, become inspired, found some of my favorite anime/books/movies, and have had so much fun in these nine years on Tumblr.

... Not to say that it hasn’t been without it’s bad. I’ve been here long enough to remember when Tumblr users proudly boasted about how open and inviting to any and all people they were, how they would never point fingers, be mean, or turn others away. Boy, how that has changed looool. I’ve been through the annoying but innocent enough superwholocks and the scandals of older users who used to be Tumblr royalty that fucked up in some way and fell from grace, to the disgrace of people who are totally fine humans that didn’t completely cater to exactly what certain people wanted or made a few wrong steps that people felt like they had to attack them viciously for the littlest asinine shit. The good the bad and the ugly, all the way through to now.

Now. :(

To be frank, this entire site has been a disaster for a loooooooooong time with a staff that seems to be equal mix of not knowing at all how to run a functioning site and not giving a shit at all about it’s user base and their feelings (which reeeeeeeally sucks for all the fantastic content creators and people who have been here forever who have essentially made this site what it is). Little things like ‘oh we made an update that ‘everyone’ will love but is actually dumb as hell and just pisses people off’ to their have been porn bots, pedos, and nazis on this site for YEARS terrorizing people and being awful but guess that is just how it will be... Until they got banned from the app store and THEN it’s an issue (because they lost money ofc)!

Suddenly, Tumblr staff cares, but only for themselves. Instead of actually resolving the issue THAT HAS BEEN GOING ON FOR YEARS AND IS AN EXTREMELY WELL KNOW AND COMPLAINED ABOUT ISSUE they just decide fuck it, punish everyone. No “porn” at all, but I use that term lightly because they say some nudity is allowed (don’t get me started on female presenting nipples it also makes me laugh to hard and then I won’t be able to type) and for some reason apparently written erotica is allowed (which makes absolutely zero sense if you are truly trying to make this a ‘family friendly’ site, why is visual porn not allowed but written OK?) but... Is it really? Posts that are completely innocent are getting tagged left and right as not suitable content. Like, thousands of posts are getting tagged by whatever stupid algorithm they are using that are completely void of anything remotely sexual and you expect me to believe your incompetent asses are going to go through them and deem which are OK and which aren’t based on you shoddy stupid ass new rules? Fuck that. 

And all the sex workers and people and run side blogs and NSFW art blogs and the like are just completely screwed (no pun intended). It upsets me because like... Porn blogs have never been the issue. There are definitely some horrible ones, no denying that, but for the most part they just stayed in their lane and interacted with other porn blogs. They weren’t the issue (And, if Tumblr knew at all how to create a damn site, they wouldn’t have been an issue at all if the damn safe mode toggle actually worked like it was supposed to). The ungodly amount of bots is the fucking issue. I can tell you right now, I have over a thousand followers and I am in no way kidding when I say half of those are porn bots that I just gave up reporting because I get like, 3 of them following me a week on average. It’s ridiculous! Also, ACTUAL FUCKING CHILD PORN? THAT IS EASILY ACCESSIBLE EVEN WHEN NOT LOOKING UP ANYTHING NSFW (which I very unfortunately know through experience)? And to top it all off, fucking NAZIS who for some reason are still allowed to spew their bullshit on this site??? Is this a nightmare?

So with all this happening, I believe it’s pretty safe to say Tumblr’s days are numbered. It makes me laugh and cry, it’s something you could see coming a mile away and yet something that you didn’t think would actually happen. I don’t want to leave Tumblr. I love you guys (the users not the staff). You have all brought joy and enrichment to my life and I am so grateful I got to be here with you. I also just like a lot of nuances of tumblr, like the fact I can read an entry so powerful and moving it brings me to tears and then just one post underneath is an over baked nonsensical cat meme which has me wheezing for reasons I can’t quite explain. I can be anonymous and as weird as I want to here without having to really worry about family, coworkers, or older friends seeing it and being like WTF is wrong with you, what does all this mean??? I like how my blog looks and how I can bitch in the tags and chat with my friends and message people and talk about my oc’s and randoms interests and get pointers and learn new things and AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I love Tumblr. I don’t want to leave and don’t necessarily plan to. But then again, I said they same thing about Xanga, and if Tumblr keeps going in the way it is going... I’m not sure I really truly  want to be lumped in with that. :/

Now this has already been entirely too long (and honestly I’m kind of feeling how I did when I started this blog in 2010 lul) but lemme say this: Thanks guys, I had a whole lot of fun. And if I do end up leaving sometime in the maybe not to distant future know that I will always be lurking around somewhere on the internet, and I had the best time while I was here. I wish nothing but the best for all of you, and may we all be able to remain a happy and dysfunctional little group, if not here, somewhere much better.