#oh edit but the best part is im a year older than her

[egberts]

i was mistaken for a child again today. specifically my girlfriend's child. again.

[ellies-little-thing]

Life goes on (e.w.) part 1

*not my images, but i edited it

My masterlist <3

pairing: young!ellie/young!reader

Warnings: fluf; reader is referred to as she/her; mentions of trauma; mentions of death and killing; just cute best friend stuff really; Kind of proofread, English is not my first language.

Author's notes: Hi! This was a request but im having a blast writing it! I hope you like it, I really liked writing it! Feedback is always welcome and likes and reblogs are always encouraged! Thank you! Enjoy!  More parts to come!

word count 1.5k

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

14 years old - Part 1

Ellie and you became instantly friends when she arrived at Jackson with Joel. Like 2 peas in a pod, you were inseparable, you were her sun and she was your moon, she always liked you a little more than friends but  she could never really explain it. Nothing could separate you, not even the apocalypse. Not even the end of the world.

You had met when she got to town, you were both 14. She was a shy girl and she seemed like she'd seen a lot of stuff. One day she was in the park alone on the swings and you saw her while you were walking home from school. The school was an old building that used to be a nursery before the outbreak , but they had made a makeover so it felt more appropriate for all ages. There weren't a lot of kids in Jackson so a new face was always welcome. There were four groups of classes at school. One for the babies, one for the toddlers, one for the kids, and one for the teens. Next year you were going  to move on up to the oldest class. You didn't really have friends at school. You talked to the other kids but they never liked you very much. When you saw Ellie, you hoped this would be an opportunity to finally make a real friend.

“Hey! I've never seen you around, you new here?” You asked her, smiling as you sat next to her and started to swing a bit.

“Hi! Yes, I'm new. Name’s Ellie.” She said shyly. “Well, nice to meet you Ellie, I'm Y/N.” You look back at her with a smile on your face.. She had very beautiful green eyes, that was the first thing you noticed about her. But they were sad ones too. You felt a bit bad for her, she must have been through a lot to get here. She had her auburn hair in a low ponytail with some hair framing her round face and freckles all over it and she also had a scar on her left eyebrow. She was pale which only made her freckles look more angelic. When she looked at you she gave you a shy smile, she wasn't used to people being nice to her.

“So, are you okay? You're all alone out here?” You ask her, trying to be as nice as possible. It was a sunny October day and the leaves were starting to fall from the trees. There was a slight breeze and the day was beautiful. The light hit her eyes perfectly, making them look even more gorgeous than they already were.

“Hum, yeah, I'm fine. Just not used to so many people.” She said fidgeting with her hands. She was wearing a purple, pink and white striped jacket with some worn out jeans and some old red converse.

“Oh, I get it. I can leave if I'm making you uncomfortable.” You say with empathy in your voice. She looked back at you with a small smile. “No, it's okay. It's nice actually, no one else has had the courage to come talk to me yet.” She smiles shyly at you. She felt a bit alone only knowing Joel, Tommy and Maria, so you were a nice change of pace. You two continued to talk and get to know each other more. 

“So where are you from?” You asked, looking forward as you swung. 

“Hum… Boston actually…” She said quietly. You made a shocked face. “That's really far away from here. The journey must have been really hard.” You say to her in a bit of a worried tone.

“It was okay. Joel was with me the whole way. He’s Tommy’s older brother actually.” She said with a slight smirk. “He wasn't the greatest company through all of it but we got along eventually. He was coming here anyway to be with his brother and brought me along.” She said this with a slight nostalgic tone and a bit sadder at the end. She didn't want to tell you she was immune and that they were actually going to meet the Fireflies down in Colorado. 

She was very sad when she woke up in the car with Joel and he told her that they had other immune people, so they didn't actually need her. She thought that maybe she was special. That she was going to save the world, but it turned out to not be the case. She didn't know what Joel had actually done. Ellie had gotten bit when she was hanging out with her friend Riley one day. They both got infected and Riley turned quickly but Ellie didn't. She saw her first love, slowly turning into a monster, it never left her thoughts. Weeks went by and she never turned. The Fireflies found her and wanted to travel her across the country to the only surgeon they knew that could maybe be able to make a cure. Joel took her there, but after that, they came to live here. She had just gotten here a few days ago.

“Really? Tommy’s brother? Didn't know he had one. But I'm glad he does and that he brought you here too.” You smile warmly at her.

She felt a bit of joy after hearing your words. Her only friend was dead and she was somewhere she didn't know but at least it seemed like you were actually being nice to her. She had gone through a lot. They took almost a year to get here. She was happy to be somewhere where people were actually nice for once.

After that day you never went another without seeing each other. You enjoyed being in each other's presence and became best friends very quickly. You had a lot in common. You both liked drawing, you liked singing while she was learning how to play guitar, You both loved comics, and as much as she was obsessed with dinosaurs and space, you were with music and books. Your bond only grew bigger every time you were together. Ellie finally felt like she wasn't alone.

You walked to school everyday together, you did your homework together, played together, felt like you could actually be kids together. It was a cruel and scary world, but now you had each other.

You got to know each other better and she told you she didn't have parents. Her mother had died giving birth to her and her father never really was in the picture so she grew up in the Boston Q.Z. as an orphan, until she came here with Joel. They started to form a father-daughter relationship and she was happy to finally have a family, even if it was a small one. Before the outbreak, Joel used to have a daughter named Sarah, but she had died and he didn't like to talk about her. He taught her how to shoot a gun, how to hunt and how to protect herself from threats.

You spent that Christmas together and Ellie loved to finally have a real Christmas with people she cared about and that loved her. You gave her an old dino plushie you had and she almost cried, no one really ever gave her a present. The only thing she had from her real family was her mother's switchblade, she went nowhere without it. She had never been so happy. Your mother didn't like Ellie very much though. She thought she was a bad influence on you but you didn't care. You hung out with her anyway. You finally had a real friend, and no one would take her away from you.

Tommy and Maria were the unofficial leaders of town, they were the ones who had founded it. It was a beautiful community where everyone contributed in some way. You were able to have electricity by using the dam in the river nearby. You considered yourself really lucky for where you lived. Older people were always telling stories about before the outbreak and right  after and how they lost so many people. How they had to survive, hide, use violence even, until they found Jackson. 

You were born here and this was normal to you, but some of the stories about before were actually cool. Like people had phones and could call eachother even across the country, shopping malls, supermarkets, museums, cars that actually worked. You had a dvd player and a cassette one too, you had found some old movies that you used to watch with your family on the weekends on an old gray TV. You liked when the teacher talked about how the world worked before, you used to dream about it almost every night.

Ellie was still haunted by the idea that her immunity meant nothing. She used to have a lot of nightmares from all the stuff that she had gone through to get here. All the people that hurt her and that she had to hurt herself. She hated herself for killing people, but they were all in self defense. But still, those ghosts followed her everywhere she went. Except for when she was with you. You made everything better. She was able to be herself with you.

[wrongcaitlyn]

OMG, I KEEP THINKING ABOUT NICO AND EVERYONE'S TIKTOK ACCOUNTS AND I JUST REALIZED- There are probably so many edits of Nico floating around tiktok 😭😭

Like I just imagine that a popular genre of edit is like the sappy type with clips of Nico, Will, and Leo from like instagram livestreams and just general appearances with Ribs by Lorde playing in the back and AHHHHH

Ppl also totally do the same with Percy, Annabeth, Jason or Piper, Leo, and Jason 😭😭

Also, with the resurgence of Apollo and his music, people are probably making so many thirst trap edits of this man like it's ridiculous just how many edits ppl are willing to make of him and Apollo's kids hate it (especially with how FOUL tiktok comments are 😭😭) Apollo himself probably thinks it's hilarious

Austin is the only one who (thankfully) has never been scarred by such things (bro is so glad he never got tiktok)

There are probably similar edits of Nico floating around, but I can't imagine Nico being comfortable with that, so I'd like to think that his fans are nice enough not to post those kinds of edits 😭😭

Also with how famous Kayla and Will (Will doesn't know how but also he appears in like EVERYONE'S tiktoks) there are probably edits of them too, but Will's consist mostly of him and Nico while Kayla's are like badass edits of her archery competitions (and you best believe Apollo reposts them with sappy comments like "my daughter 🥹🥹")

THIS WAS WAY LONGER THAN I MEANT FOR IT TO BE OMG IM SO SORRY 😭😭 HAVE A GOOD DAY 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶

HDKSHDJS NICO EDITORS GO HARD (i say as an editor)HDKSJF

dude the edits would be CRAZY partly bc it’s so hard to find good content of him so you KNOW itd be impossible to get scene packs. goodbye to the artists that you have interviews of and tour movies, it’s nearly impossible to get a good quality video for an edit of nico

which makes everyone use that one interview he did at 16 over and over and over and over againHDKDN

i DEFINITELY think the majority of edits are him with his friends or fan interactions bc those are like the only videos that are out there (but also the angels fandom treats leo and will as their own little niche celebs)

the part about the foul comments on thirst trap edits of apollo is SO SO SO REAL. you just KNOW that there are a thousand people calling him a dilf in the comments, and a blend of current clips of him with his older content in movies and shows… tiktok revives the apollo craze in a new generationJDKD

i just know that kayla would go through those comment sections, comment “i need to bleach my eyes” and then go through every single one and block everyone who says a remotely dirty thing abt her dad she is TRYING to live in peace (but there’s no escaping it)

there’d be people being like WHAT WHERE DID KAYLAS ACCOUNT GO??? and then be like oh shit… i commented on that one apollo edit…HDKDJ

i do think there are definitely some thirst trap edits of nico but the hard thing is that there’s like. zero clips that would be good for that. like they go off this 2 second video from a fan and a blurry vid of a concert from the nosebleeds and the editors do their VERY BEST to make it look hot

and yet the comments go insane anyway

will saves them but that’s not important

more people make thirst trap edits of leo just because it’s very common for him to interact with them and commentHEKFJS i just feel like he absolutely would

and also will just bc. i mean. it’s will.

also there’d be a lot of content of him from lou ellen’s vids… there’s be a random viral vid including him and he becomes white boy of the month bc of one incredibly viral velocity. but then he just. it’s like every year he’s white boy of the month for at least one month. and he’s like wtf how does this keep happening

nico saves all those edits as well but that’s not important

and kayla’s are def more of her in archery like there’s a very very niche section of tiktok that are such fans of her (also probably velocities of her dancing tiktoks) and since she has so much content online it’s much easier to edit her

anyway the variety between those fan bases i could go on for AGESDJDK i LOVE to imagine these types of things and your hc’s are spot on!!

[driedupeyeballs]

OH MY GOD???? I already love them sm

I literally edited a new profile for them for this cuz the old one was outdated BUT YEAH IDK IF THIS WAS AN INVITE TO INFODUMP ABT MY JAMIAZU FANKID BUT IM USING IT AS ONE

Btw I can only wish to achieve your level of snake knowledge I thought my reptile hyperfixation went deep but yours is deeper I wanna know your ways

But that isn’t relavent YEAH HERES MY JAMIAZU FANKID HI TUMBLR *lets them out like you would a spider under a cup*

So I have a shit ton of Twst fankids btw! They kinda swim around in my brain but only a few ppl I know have gotten the info dumps lmao

Skye was the first one I made I think (actually it might’ve been Rico (florid) but eh oh well who’s counting)

But yes this is Skye Ashengrotto!

They’re my older Jamiazu kid, I do have two. The younger one is my octo boy Akram :) he’s funny I wanna pinch his cheeks but he’s not the point here

So Skye! It feels weird publically infodumping abt my OCs like wtf am I even supposed to put here

They’re a half mer, which do work a lil different than normal mers in my lore. Half mers can transform without a potion but it’s still a long and generally painful process, esp going from mer to human. I kind of switch between calling them a snake mer and a naga but there’s lore there- Nagas exist in my lore outside of sea snake mers, there are also fully terrestrial Nagas. So the terrestrial nagas wouldn’t be considered snake mers but the sea snake nagas would be a type of mer while also still being a naga ITS CONFUSING DONT ASK (actually do. Ask everything so I can roll more of my fankids out like marbles)

Skye was created by a spell, I haven’t quite worked the details out 😔 but Jamil is part gorgon in my lore which is why they have the hair snakes which isn’t a typical naga trait. And to elaborate on the hair snakes: they are alive, the one w the bigger stripes is Flora and the smaller stripes is Jett. Skye can communicate w them telepathically and their eyes glow which is kinda neat. They’re kind of Skye’s version of floatsam and jetsam (unless u count Rico (florid) and Lilac (treyjade) which is like their ver of the twins- IDK ITS COMPLICATED)

idk what else to put here so LETS THROW SOME FHARACTER DYNAMICS YEAH and also mentioning some of my other fankids! They all have profiles (except my Malleus kid I’m sorry Aihan I can’t think of a design for you) but I’m probably gonna save those for another post-

So jamiazu in my lore live in the Shaftlands in a beachfront place and also live pretty close to Treyjade, however Florid live in the Queendom. The octatrio and their spouses is a close group so they’re essentially a big family. My treyjade kids are Maren (older) and Lilac, then my Florid kids are Rico (older) and the twins Mary and Eliza.

Skye saw Lilac more as a kid cuz they lived so close together but also saw Rico a lot when flrd would visit or they’d go to visit them. Rico is an agent of chaos and Lilac is Skye’s 2nd in command so their dynamic on a surface level is pretty similar to the octatrio, but there’s still a lot of differences once u get into the meat of it. Tho Lilac and Rico are Skye’s best friends and basically like siblings to them.

Outside of jamiazu Skye is particularly close with Jade, they share a love of tea :) he’s their cool but also slightly unsettling uncle

THEN THERES SHENZI- Shenzi is my younger kaliruggie kid and I am not gonna get into her here bcuz she rlly needs her own post w all her trauma but good lord these two do not like each other. Shenzi’s really nice but she’s not quite as nice as Kalim so after about 5 months of trying and failing to befriend Skye in their freshman year she just gave up and now their relationship is nothing but hostile (which was not helped when Shenzi and lilac started dating)

Speaking of that tho- so my idikei kids :) Ember (named after the pokemon attack) is the older one and he’s basically that “Jock idia can’t hurt you he’s not real Jock idia:” thing as a person he has the Fire hair n shit but he plays basketball and is heavily extroverted but no one gives a shit abt Ember this is NOT ABT HIM this is abt his sister! Her name is Zelda because you know Idia would name his daughter Zelda- she got all of Idia’s social anxiety lmao. She’s extremely shy and there’s a total of like 4 people in the school she can actually talk to without melting into a small stain on the floor. She’s an Skye are both in board games club and sometime in early freshman year she falls on her ass and knocks over a bunch of stuff which Skye happens to witness and cue the most awkward interaction known to man bcuz Skye can’t talk to pretty girls and Zelda can’t talk to ANYONE but they end up walking to the mirror hall together afterwards which becomes a routine. Except they’re both awkward as fuck take like almost two fucking years to get together bcuz neither of them are gonna do anything abt it BUT THEYRE VERY CUTE!! I love them

Also my ashengrotto siblings are very wholesome I need to write some stuff w them- Akram is a little shit and he loves pissing Skye off but at the end of the day he admires them and Skye loves their brother a lot :)

Anyway good lord I’ve yapped too much okay OH YEAH Skye has a Russian blue cat named Mariana who they just fucking found on the side of the road and thought it was a mouse so for like 2 years Azul thought Skye was gonna eat the cat

OK HERES RHE ACTUAL PROFILE these aren’t as chaotic as the other ones all the other ones are more meme than profile ALSO RHEIR UNIQUE MAGIC DOESNR HAVE A NAME AT THE MOMENT IF ANHONE HAS AN IDEA FOR ONE PLS SHARE I HABE NO THOUGHTS

(If you recognize my art style from instagram no you don’t also THEY DO HABE EYES I JUST DONT DRAW THEM CUZ MY STYLES WEIRD)

But yeah I love them I hope they explode (affectionate)

[you-misunderstood-the-beatles]

this definitely isnt a cry for help....but i lie sometimes

also beware bc its a short story so theres many many details in a lil bit of time...im not sorry

NOT EDITED I JUST THREW THIS TOGETHER...ITS 12:30 AM (no names are real, especially mine lmao)

Hi, I'm Georgie and I'm not sure why the universe decided to do this to me…let me explain. I have spent my whole life trying to figure out where i can be myself naturally and fully but when i finally thought i found that space, i was so insanely wrong that i felt stupid. I found Maeve and Grace at different times. I met Maeve about a month after I found this "special place" and i found Grace around a year into doing it. My special place was a stage. I found love for acting and singing and dancing in front of countless people. Theater was my home, and I cherished it the best I could.

It was a mentally stimulating hobby. I got to focus one one specific thing for months on end and it was amazing…until I met Camille, that is. Camille was the epitome of textbook basic bitch. She had long brown hair, big brown eyes and she had a lot of money, courtesy of being related to the mayor, of all people. She went to a private catholic school and was pretty popular there too, from what I had heard from Maeve, who had also gone to the same school for a really long time.

Maeve and Camille were attached at the hip. And sure, I could be projecting my own insecurities into this but to be honest, Camille has never liked me, and I've known that. For almost a year I was a threat to her only lasting friendship she had ever experienced. Especially since she's a toxic bitch and one of the reasons she hates me beyond reasonable doubt is because at that point I had been the only person ever brave enough to call her out on it.

Camille was absolutely, positively a bad person.

Sure I wasn't as talented or experienced as them but at least I tried…Camille, Maeve and Grace started getting closer after about 4 months of me being friends with Grace. Grace had been one of my main confidants. She listened when I told her about my family problems or friendly problems, and I did the same for her. We trusted each other…or so I thought. After we finished with our spring show for the year we had a party where the entire cast was invited. A 'cast party' dare I say…

At this cast party we had nearly the whole cast of the show there, including Maeve, Grace and the one Bitch to rule all Bitches, Camille. I avoided them, for the most part, I had other friends i was allowed to hang out with. One of them being a girl named Livvy. She was sweet and she was good at singing and acting and being a friend. She was good. She was younger than me but so were Maeve, Grace and Camille so what's new?

Livvy was quiet unless with friends, which made me glad to be considered one of hers because I got to know the true Livvy… Sure she could let her slightly chaotic nature show in dramatic bursts but i enjoyed that about her. Livvy reminded me of Camille if she was a good friend or person. Livvy listened but we weren't super close, not like how I was with Maeve or Grace but we were good together, we contrated perfectly and our naturally polite personalities didn't ever clash which was relieveing.

Another girl I'm friends with who was there is Lilly. Her and Livvy had been friends since they were 3. They talk about it a lot, I don't mind it though. It's fun getting to hear about things they've enjoyed doing together for years! It just sometimes makes me sad that I never get close enough to people for them to enjoy my presence or if we do get close enough something, or someone, happens and they don't care anymore. Here's where the story comes in more.

There's another girl to introduce though…her name is Jaqueline. She's small and young and blonde and talented but, just like Camille, she's an asshole.And just like Camille, she hides her bitchyness with talent and sweet talking the older people in her life to get what she wants. Oh and I forgot to add…both Camille and Jaqueline got leads…

I got to the cast party so so so excited to finally get to hang out with Maeve without Camille watching like a hawk but sadly Camille was there, fortunately she was hanging around Jaqueline and a girl named Laila who follows her around everywhere anyway. I finally was able to chill with Maeve and Grace they started walking away or acting like I wasn't even there…shitty thing to do, I know. But it isn't like I need their attention…they are just some of my best friends I have so of course i wanted to hang out with them.

When everyone left the party me and my family were the last ones to leave, like always, and when we had gotten home i got a call from Maeve and it went something like this: "Hey, Georgie! Me and Grace just found out we're cousins!!!" "Uhm, what?" "Me and Grace are fourth cousins!!" "Look, that sounds great but I have a question for you…" "yeah sure, what is it?" "I heard you and grace talking about having a sleepover earlier, is she staying at your house tonight?" "Yeah! why?" "oh, no reason…congratulations on finding out you guys are cousins i guess but i just got home and im exhausted…im gonna go." "ok byeeee"

They met because of me. I created this mess. I've been telling Maeve we should hang out here and there and she's always "busy" but as soon as her and Grace click they're having sleepovers? Bullshit. Absolute bullshit.

Maeve is the one who has said over and over for more than a year that if she didn't have me she wouldn't know what she would do…and then she ignores me on purpose and treats me like I'm nothing but gum on the bottom of her shoe….

Why me? Why make me go through so much just for me to regret every last desicion I've ever made…? Why?

I don't even know how to recover from this stab straight to the heart…what do I do? I've only ever turned to Maeve and Grace for my problems…what do I do now?

[alluringjae]

au cours de l’été - jjh

⤑ translation: over the summer

⤑ summary: this is a story of an exhausted painter who needed a breather from the hectic city life. so aside from moving to the countryside, the needed air in your lungs also came in the form of a person. this summer meant for pure relaxation, perhaps your heart may dive into him too.

⤑ pairing: jaehyun x female reader

⤑ word count: 15.2k (so much for saying that i’ll be writing shorter stories)

⤑ genre: fluff, romance, smut | author!jaehyun, painter!reader, strangers to lovers!au, 50s-60s!au, summer love in france!au

⤑ warnings: me inserting some french phrases because I want to practice (feel free to correct me if I made mistakes, i’ll appreciate them), fictional interpretations of real-life people, explicit language, jaehyun being such a romantic pls im in tears, mentions and scenes of burnout (the worst)

⤑ playlist: everybody loves somebody by dean martin | c’est si bon by eartha kitt | it’s always you by chet baker | les yeux ouverts by emilie-claire barlow | a sunday kind of love by etta james | the most beautiful thing by bruno major | try again by jaehyun and d.ear (duh) | free love (dream edit) by honne | petite fleur by jill barber | plus je t’embrasse by blossom dearie | so this is love by ilene woods and mike douglas

⤑ author’s note: this was an idea that just came to me after pinterest kept recommending me poetic beauty/try again jaehyun, so here we are! i intended to write less than 5k words but sometimes plans don’t go as planned once you really invest in the story yet i’m really happy how this turned out!

the romantic exhilaration in my bones are off the charts because this is jaehyun we’re talking about lol enjoy!

⤑ masterlist

⤑ leave me some feedback, constructive criticism, or hellos!

3 juin 1957

The city life overstimulated your entire system, losing your brainpower and inspiration. Another exhibition that’ll feature your works with other influential painters was happening at the end of the year, and you had nothing prepared so far. You’ve crashed to the deep end of creative fatigue.

So you needed to get away again; somewhere quieter and surrounded by nature.

That’s why you ended up in the countryside down south, somewhere within Provence. It’s purely just for the summer, but extensions were okay as long you get back at least a month before the show. Filing that leave of absence at the studio you worked at was worth it.

You rented an apartment overlooking the marketplace, where the heart of the village was. After arranging things from your boxes and luggage the entire day, you found out that you lacked in the food department.  

So the succeeding day, the entire morning was spent on grocery shopping downstairs then stocking them inside your refrigerator, freezer, and pantry. Right after changing out of your pajamas into a flowy floral dress and sandals, you decided to bike to the bakery that locals suggested. A must-go place for newcomers, they all raved.

“Café des Étoiles Perdues.” (Café of Lost Stars.)

The clear chimes of the bell resounded through the small, cottage-like lobby as you entered inside. An old woman, whom you assumed was the owner, welcomed you openly.

“Oh la la, vous êtes belle! Vous vous appelez (Y/N), la nouvelle venue, n'est-ce pas?” (Oh la la, you’re beautiful. Your name is (Y/N), the newcomer, right?)

She complimented, making you shyly mutter your answer. Wiping off the flour from her apron, she introduced herself kindly.

“Je m’appelle Camille. Mes spécialités sont les macarons pisctaches et des croissants avec des amandes. Autre chose que tu aimes?” (I’m Camille. My specialties are the pistachio macarons and croissants with almonds. Is there anything else you like?)

“J'aime tout ce que vous suggères, Madame.” (I’d like anything that you suggest, Madame.)

A younger man, who went by Jaemin, was a part-timer barista who asked for your coffee order. As he directed you to the best seat of the café, which was outside overlooking the garden of blooming sunflowers, you pulled out your sketch pad so you could capture this dreamy view. It was nothing like you’ve ever seen in your life.

You’ve decided on a theme already for your exhibit thanks to your conversations with locals yesterday, which was related to freedom. After being chained to cities for so-called better living and financial standards, it’s actually how your inspiration to create squeezed the life out of you like a lemon. Although it was fun at first to see those tourist spots, it eventually got tiring.

Another matchstick to graze intensity through your bones was what you prayed for.

While you’re engaged in a rough sketch of the scenery, the dandy presence of a young man entered the café with his books. White shirt, red trousers with a matching beret, he sported freckles on his pale face. Despite visiting his favorite café numerously, Camille was overjoyed to see him and his serene smiles.

“Jaehyun! What brings you here?”

“Bonjour, Madame! I’m starving for your croissants because I ran out back home.”

“Not to worry! I’ll pack up some so you’re on your way.” She lightened him up like one of her kids, taking one of the bigger paper bags.

“No rush though, Madame. I’ll be reading and working here for a bit here.” Jaehyun affirmed, bringing it out his wallet and called out for Jaemin.

“Un café crème, s’il vous plait.” (One cup of cappuccino, please.)

Jaehyun’s usual chair was by the large window, overseeing the wide garden planted by the citizens of the village way before he was born. It was places like this he missed after moving to the city for his education and work’s sake. 

That’s the thing when you’re coming from a rich family; you don’t have much of say with what your parents order you to do. However, his recent request to stay in his childhood home (or mansion) again was fulfilled because he couldn’t search for what he needed in the cities anymore.

Jaehyun was a sucker for romance; an old romantic others would say. A lot of women mistook his kindness as flirting on many occasions, but ironically he just wasn’t looking for anyone yet. 

Starting as a novelist in the said genre based on real-life stories of people he met in Paris, Barcelona, London, and more, his stories were popular hits especially to young adults who aspire to find love one day.

However, traveling to the known places no longer felt fun as he got older. The stories he gathered were very similar, just in different languages. It took an enthusiastic dinner with his family, specifically his only older sister Krystal retelling fond stories from their younger years to get the idea of moving back for a bit. So consumed with the city life, he wanted to see things from another perspective.

What was the difference between a love story formed in the countryside than in the city?

It’s been a month since he arrived, but he didn’t hurry himself to do his research. He’s been reading books in his family library, revisiting monumental places, exploring around the village, and reconnecting with old friends as if he never left. 

Readjusting to his former life would make writing easier when he’s motivated enough to do it again. Besides, his books were profiting well enough to his taste; good enough for the next 10 years according to his personal accountant, Kim Jungwoo.

Jaehyun resumed reading this book his mother recommended him before he left. Entitled “Réessaye”, which was about a young man who reunites with his childhood sweetheart after his arranged marriage failed. After what she put her through, he’s hesitant whether to try again or let her go.

Jaehyun enjoyed reading books with realistic outlooks on love because he found them more meaningful, enlightening how exactly it makes you feel and do. Even if he enjoyed reading sappy, fairytale-like stories from time to time, he always returned to the real ones as they only displayed the truth.

That love isn’t always rainbows and sunshine, but something that can also break you especially if you go after the wrong person. This kind of mindset was how he toiled on his stories, which gained him a status outside of his unavoidable labels such as “the only striking son of the Jeong family” or “Valentine Boy”.

He diligently browsed through the climax, where the main male character confessed all his constrained emotions to his sweetheart. But it was until Jaemin pressed the bag of croissants in front of his face after placing down his childhood friend’s drink to disturb his peace.

“Reading again?” He taunted, snatching his book away and throwing the bag on Jaehyun’s lap. “When are you writing that book already? Everyone is practically dying for you to release something new again!”

Jaehyun flatly shook his head, drinking his coffee quietly. It’s not the first time anyone asked (or pressured) him about his next release, and it’s the last thing he wanted to think about. “Not in the mood right now, Jaemin. Now off to work before Madame Camille scolds you again.”

“You’re just stalling because you have nothing to write, don’t you?” Jaemin cunningly expressed, raising a brow. He’s known to catch onto the people’s bs easily; the last person you’d want to say your secrets too and Jaehyun realized too late. Though lucky for him, Jaemin shut the topic down right away so he wouldn’t pop a vein.

“Sais-tu de la nouvelle venue dans le village, d'ailleurs?” (Do you know about the newcomer in the village, by the way?)

“Une nouvelle venue?” (A newcomer?)

Being stuck at his mansion recently, news about village affairs were now late to him. Jaemin’s finger discreetly pointed outside the window, pertaining to a young woman sat outside painting her view in front of her.

That would be you, shading all the flowers in bright colors.

Seeing a new face amazed Jaehyun, especially when she was almost someone right out of a book. In a neat bun with white daisies printed in her dress, she crossed her legs whilst continuing her movements. She bit her lower lip, frustrated over an accidental smudge she made and trying to fix it by blending it with another color. When she accomplished it, she swapped brushes. A thinner one, to outline the shapes of the flower. Her lips curved to a smile after finishing another one perfectly with the rest.

“Jaehyun?”

Jaemin snapped his fingers to his distracted friend, zoning out the window. Still something he hasn’t stop doing, he pondered. With a final snap, Jaehyun broke away from falling hard from his abstract. Jaemin calculated the problem so quickly, analyzing his friend breezily like his medical school requirements.

“Elle est splendide, n'est-ce pas?” (She’s gorgeous, right?)

“Elle ressemble à une personne décente.” (She looks like a decent person.)

Jaehyun pushed it aside, flipping back to the page where he stopped reading. Before Jaemin responded, the door chimed open again to alarm him that a new customer came in. He excused himself to his friend, warning him that this wasn’t the last time he’ll talk about the newcomer too.

Jaehyun nodded along, not taking his friend’s cheeky words so seriously. However, the final result you attempted to create tickled his curiosity, so he slyly peeked from his book to the window.

You’ve freed your hair down, victorious to have started your collection this early in your break. A fantastic start, you let the paint dry first and munch on the croissant that served as your reward. However, you ‘re quick to notice a manly figure glancing through the window. From the side, his brown eyes appeared lively even if his entire face was hidden by the book.

Réessaye by Mark Lee; he must be a romantic. Every person in your studio read it, excluding yourself. Painfully beautiful, they’d summarize it.

Daring to meet more people, you locked eye contact with him. He didn’t expect it, almost flipping from his chair. Bashfully, you waved him a hello to somewhat break the ice. However, it broke his composure, and suddenly, he scurried off with his things from the café.

Now, you got quite worried. You checked your tiny mirror if he saw anything unpleasant with you, but you’d say you look relatively fine. Oh, maybe you could redeem yourself the next time you saw him. After bidding goodbye to Camille and Jaemin, the latter chased after you when you prepared yourself on your bike.

“By any chance, did you say hi to a guy with brown eyes and a red beret?”

“Well, more like I waved at him, then he zoomed out. Did I do something wrong?” You questioned with concern, putting your hands on the handles.

“That’s my friend, who’s quite reserved with strangers. I’m sorry on his behalf.”

“Nah, it’s fine.” You brushed it off politely. “See you again soon, Jaemin!”

Peddling away, letting the cool breeze fan you, your mind reverted its thoughts to that strange man. Maybe you’ll give it some time; you had a lot of it.

“Shucks, he was pretty cute.”

12 juin 1957

The world must really be on your side with these good decisions because you crossed paths with the strange man again in the café a week later. But instead of running away, he asked nicely if he could sit across your free chair in front of your table outside. It was a Saturday, and the place was packed.

“Joignez-moi, s’il vous plait.” (Join me, please.)

You insisted, giving yourself time to subtly observe his physique a lot more. Freckles dotted under his eyes like a constellation, bushy eyebrows, pink cheeks to match his pale complexion, and wearing a fuzzy knit sweater that meshed well with his green beret. He had some sort of necklace too; there was a heart pendant.

“Vous êtes une artiste.” (You’re an artist.) The small wooden palette of paint beside your small sketch pad was exposed, finding it as a great icebreaker.

“Une peintre, spécifiquement. Franchement, les visuels ici sont trés captivants qu'à Paris.” (A painter, to be specific. Frankly, the visuals here are more captivating than in Paris.)

“Je suis d’accord,” (I agree,) Jaehyun leaned against his chair, taking a better look at you with the remaining light from the descending sun.

“Oh, vous êtes comme moi. J’habite à Paris aussi.” (Oh, you’re like me. I live in Paris too.)

“Bon, je suis née à Londres. Puis, j’ai déménagé où je voulais en Europe depuis j'avais 18 ans. Mais oui, j’habite définitivement à Paris maintenant.” (Well, I was born in London then moved wherever I wanted in Europe for inspiration since I was 18. But yes, I live permanently in Paris now.)

You clarified, beginning to enjoy his comforting company. Initiating conversations with people you’re not acquainted with wasn’t in your range of skills, though he didn’t have an intimidating vibe. He looked too youthful to act like that.

“Je m’appelle (Y/N), d'ailleurs.” (I’m (Y/N), by the way.) You stuck out your hand as a sign of respect, which he enthusiastically obliged.

“Salut, (Y/N). Je m’appelle Jaehyun.” [Hi, (Y/N). I’m Jaehyun.]

He kissed it in a gentleman fashion, applying the manners he’s been taught since he was a child. Should you have been flustered, but no.  It’s been a long time since anyone greeted you like that, specifically back home.

Throughout your talk, you learned more about who he was, his job, and what his life in the countryside is like. He was an author of romance novels, yet you’ve never heard about him prior. Heavily prioritizing your work, you don’t keep up with the new releases or trends at all. Though after mentioning his last name, it piqued your interest.

“Jeong? As in the business, Jeong Tea Inc.?”

“Correct.”

His family was one of the most affluent families in Parisian society. Old money immigrants from South Korea, they brought their tea business to France and it boomed successfully. You’re quite sure you’ve seen his parents in past exhibits, but never did you approach them because you were a rookie then. But he reassured you that it was fine, and to just treat him like you’d treat your friends. Plus, it came to your knowledge that he was the same age as you too.

He opened up how this village was where he lived his childhood, so he asked his parents if he could hand over their mansion for a while for rest. It then shocked both of you at how identical your reasons were for staying in the countryside.

“I’m burnt out from the city, so I’m trying to regain my spirit here hopefully. Besides, I needed a change of scenery after living there for 3 years. My longest stay yet outside of London!”

“I need new ideas for my books. The cities don’t charm me anymore, so I returned here for peace and quiet. Maybe let these ideas come to me rather than me going after them.”

From a bigger lens, people would conclude your interaction as a sight of two artists who passionately talk about their art. But to you, you’d interpret it as two relaxed, young adults in their twenties who simply wanted to run away from the pressures of their art and enjoy the summer as every young adult should.

Not cooped up in the studio or office, but innocently waltzing around with your youth while it’s still there.

début de juillet 1957

“Dépêche-toi, (Y/N)!” [Hurry up, (Y/N)!]

Jaehyun yelled at your open balcony from downstairs, parking his mini car beside your bike. He planned on taking you somewhere a little farther this time; to absolutely feel like one of the locals.

The countryside urged you to wear more dresses and flat shoes, so you took out a turquoise dress with a white scarf to wrap on top of your head. Like your relaxed fit, your mindset too was calm. Upon meeting him, he wore his round spectacles with a red knit sweater over a white turtleneck long-sleeved top. His fingers were adorned with silver rings, then around his neck was a thin black ribbon. He curled some of his hair again, a style you really liked of his.

You can’t lie, but this man could pull any trend or style and still look extra pretty.

Out of all the locals you’ve befriended in your stay, Jaehyun was always your companion. He took you to varying places that those locals don’t visit nor tourists acknowledge in their reviews for the past few weeks. For someone who hasn’t been in the village for a long time, his memory didn’t disappoint. His childhood was only filled with cheerful moments.

Today, he was taking you to a peaceful district of shops in the farther part of the village. It’s where he’d buy sweets, journals, and accessories with his mother, Krystal, and one of his housemaids every other weekend.

All the stores there were currently bombarded with blooming flowers along their alley, bringing more enticement to those who were roaming around. There was so much life here; the head waiter of one restaurant smiling at every passing customer, one florist handing a free flower to anyone who asks, and a young lady showcasing her jewelry collection to a bunch of women who looked like tourists.

“Cette librairie vendent des livres enveloppés dans du papier. Ma mère m'a offerte l'un d'eux pour mon anniversaire tous les ans comme une surprise.” (This bookstore sells books wrapped in paper. My mother gifted me one of them on my birthday every year as a surprise.)

He trained his attention at a rustic shop with open wooden windows giving a glimpse of their shelves.

“Avez-vous fini les lisant?” (Have you finished reading them?)

“Du début à la fin.” (From cover to cover.)

He took you to this rooftop restaurant overlooking the entire plaza. Since he didn’t arrange a reservation yet didn’t get rejected, he must know the owner. Especially how a lot of the staff gave casual hellos and high fives.

Speaking of the owner, he walked out of his kitchen to introduce himself to you. He went by the name Moon Taeil, another one of Jaehyun’s childhood friends whom he used to play at his house whenever his parents came along.

Gobbling up in the appetizing food Taeil prepared beforehand, Jaehyun brought up your painting exhibition again. He loved hearing artists talk about their works, wanting to know more about their driven mindset and what their imagination is like. After all, it does vary for everyone.

“So far,” You poked your fork through the chicken, taking a bite of it. “I’ve produced 3 paintings. The garden of flowers outside Café des Étoiles Perdues, the kids playing hopscotch in the alley, and the peach tree outside your house.”

“Woah, you’re on a roll.” Jaehyun clapped across you, pouring you another glass of water. He recalled the nights you ranted not having any clue what to do for the exhibit. Then after taking you to more places, he’s rewarded to see you be creatively active again. “How many artworks do you left to make?”

“Around 3-4 left. I have ideas already, but I’m still brainstorming.” You internally rejoiced, loving how much progress you’ve made. “How about you, Jaehyun? How’s your progress?”

Unlike you, Jaehyun still felt stuck. Although he did find couples around the village, none of them intrigued him as much as his past stories. But he won’t give up easily; that’s not in his work ethic.

“Still searching, but I’ll get there.”

Recently, you got ahold of some of Jaehyun’s books from him personally since they weren’t sold in the village. You wanted to understand how he became so well known outside the labels people put him under. Reading his first novel entitled “Des Papillons” (Butterflies), it was about a couple separated during World War II without contact or knowledge about their well-being. Yet whenever they saw butterflies on the day they parted, they took it as a sign that the other was alive wherever they were.

You’re always hanging on the cliff when the scenes revert back and forth to the main male lead getting stuck in intense war scenarios, rooting for him to get out alive each time. In the end, it took 7 years before they were reunited and wed.

Jaehyun had a wonderful way with his words and descriptions, managing to enwrap you in as if you’re also a character in the book. Like how you rooted for that male lead, you’re rooting for him to find his spark again.

Following this uplifting conversation, Jaehyun finally took to your greatly anticipated spot. It was the main viewpoint of Gordes, one of the most beautiful hilltop villages in the country. The sunset was about to hit, and the lights from the city across you slowly turned on like a bunch of dominos.

As you marveled at its aesthetics, Jaehyun leaned against the hood of his car. He sensed how in awe you were, more than you ever were in the city he assumed. So used to the city that being surrounded with nature became foreign to you.

He took out his polaroid camera from his trunk and captured a photo of you from behind. The shutter sounds were obvious, turning your back at the commotion. Jaehyun fanned the freshly printed photo to dry, giving a mischievous smile.

“What can I say? While you’re fawning over the view, mine was more enamoring.”

Although Jaehyun felt overwhelmed the first time he locked eyes with you, he can’t resist the power of his developing feelings for you. The more time he took you around, the more his heart found different details about you to admire. After listening to all those love stories in the past, the people he spoke to shared how there will be some distinct moment where your heart decides who they’re longing for.

That exact view of you by the cliff, he already knew.

He’s infatuated by you.

“Tu es très ringard, Jaehyun.” (You’re so cheesy, Jaehyun.) You scoffed sassily, with a hand on your waist.

“Un gentleman ne ment jamais, (Y/N). Allez, il fait nuit maintenant.” [A gentleman never lies, (Y/N). Come on, it’s night already.]

He cleverly responded, grabbing his car keys from his pocket. The trip back to the village was energizing, putting down the roof of his car to relish the chill breeze of the night weather. You even raised your arms in the air, losing your scarf even from the speed Jaehyun went at!

The two of you belted along to the songs on the radio when the fields were the only ones surrounding you, no neighbors to shout at your rambunctiousness.

The late-night hours drew by so quickly almost like dinner with more of Jaehyun’s friends didn’t happen. Arriving at the front doors of your apartment complex, Jaehyun raced over to your side to open your door. Always maintained proper observation of manners, you appreciated that side of him. Rarely anyone in Paris that you’ve encountered treated you that way because you were a foreigner.

“Bonsoir, (Y/N).” [Goodnight, (Y/N).]

“Bonsoir, Jaehyun. Quand est-ce que je te revois?” (Goodnight, Jaehyun. When can I see you again?)

“Demain et après-demain. Appelle-moi quand tu es libre.” (Tomorrow, and the day after that. Just give me a call when you’re free.)

With a short wave, you entered your building and marched up to the stairs. A good day only meant being tired to the core, ready to crash and fall in your soft bed. Opening your wide windows to let more of the cool breeze in, your eyes easily caught Jaehyun’s classy car still there. As for the owner, he didn’t move an inch from his leaning position.

“Rentre à la maison, Jaehyun! C’est tard!” (Go home, Jaehyun! It’s late!) You shrieked, peeking side to side to make sure none of the neighbors scold you.

Jaehyun laughed wholeheartedly, not budging at all. “La nuit ne fait que commencer, ma chérie.” (The night has just begun, my darling.)

“Comment tu m'as appelé?” (What did you call me?)

Either your ears were fooling you or he addressed you by a divine pet name. The gasp you swallowed, as your entire body tingled with exhilaration. Your mind would simply disregard it like his former teasing words, but your heart begged to differ.

Rather than responding with words, Jaehyun’s voice serenaded you with a wondrous song, C’est Si Bon by Eartha Kitt, that played on the radio earlier. Out of the blue, a random guitar accompaniment followed his baritone vocals.

“En voyant notre mine ravie,”

Against the railing of your wired balcony, your body shifted forward to watch him better.

“Les passants dans la rue, nous envient,”

Your hand perched on your cheek, admiring his talent.

“C'est si bon de guetter dans ses yeux,”

It was like a lullaby, and here you were drowning in its peacefulness. Sensing the passion he gives off in his singing, your heart couldn’t refrain the strings inside from being swayed and tugged.

This was your moment of realization: that you too were smitten.

“Un espoir merveilleux, qui donne le frisson…”

À la mi-juillet de 1957

“Hello, nature!” You greeted brightly as your legs raced the huge garden in his manor. It was the first time he invited you over, too lazy to go out of the city. His social battery needed a recharge for the weekend, so a picnic within his home would do the trick. Additionally, it was an excuse to bring you over after the numerous times you’ve begged him to.

Jaehyun merely shook his head, enjoying the rush of childlike fun in your veins while you squealed and grazed your hands through the flowers.

He carried a wooden basket full of treats his family maids cooked, taking his time to venture through the rows of flowers. They were growing healthily and phenomenally these days, sometimes riding his bike to personally water them since he became busy with writing again. Lately, he found inspiration again, and so he wrote day and night to set them free.

“Voila!” You yanked out a sunflower, sniffing it a little. “Come on, Jaehyun! Pick up a few for our lunch!”

He followed your order, picking out some he found ideal. But just for fun, he put down the basket and carried you from behind out of the blue. You tried kicking him away, but his muscular arms can’t compete with your soft ones.

“What are you doing?”

“You said to pick up a flower, so I did. The prettiest of them all.”

His flirtatious words were never serious, yet you took it as a compliment. That’s how high your confidence is. Only we define our own worth, not others. The two of you chatted more about your lives until the first rain of the season poured down, chilling down from the raging heat. None of you had an umbrella; the weather was too unpredictable.

Deciding to just run for it, he gave you the wooden basket to protect yourself whilst he used the blanket you’ve sat on. Running with laughter to return to his mansion in the muddy dirt, the cool drops shivered your figure yet felt fantastic.

If you were in the city, you’d panic because it’d mess your appearance and your boss would be infuriated by your unprofessionalism. But in the countryside, it didn’t matter at all. The condition of the rain wasn’t budging to improve, getting stronger by the minute. His entire house even lost power, his housemaids having to bring candles to his bedroom and your assigned one once night dawned.

It was hopeless to return home for you, plus it’s dangerous to drive in in the dark, narrow streets too. Jaehyun handed you some of his fresh clothes so you’d be free from flinching from cold dress sticking to your body.

“Get dressed and some sleep, (Y/N).”

Nodding, you excused yourself to find the bathroom. You’d assume it’d be easy, but this was your first time in his house; a mansion even. Doors from left to right, long corridors that seemed never-ending, no maids were within the vicinity whom you can ask for guidance.

Resorting to return to Jaehyun’s chamber for help, you were taken aback by what your eyes laid on. In front of his full mirror, he discarded his now-dried shirt. Even with the dim lighting, you could make out that he was fit by the transparent view of his abdomen. Peeping like this was wrong, yet you couldn’t turn away just yet. The heat in your cheeks was inevitable, finding composure in such an unholy sight.

Though a gear in you suddenly twisted; a gear that straightened your nerves. You’re taking a bold move on the chessboard of your feelings. Wholly opening his bedroom door again, you leisurely sauntered inside without warning.

“Oh, (Y/N)! Ne peux pas trouver la salle de bain?” (Oh, (Y/N)! Can’t find the bathroom?)

Unbothered as he stood shirtless, you on the other hand silently dropped his clothes on the floor. Holding intense eye contact, your fingers graciously unzipped the side of your dress. Inch by inch, the tension built up like the strong tiny flames lit on the candles around you two. Joining the pile of clothes, all that remained were your white lace undergarments. Unplanned for the get-go, it’s the ideal set for your earlier outfit at the picnic.

“Je me suis perdue, mais je pense avoir trouvé quelque chose de mieux.” (I got lost, but I think I found something better.)

Your fingers grazed your arm up to your collarbones, faking your naivety. From your lust-filled stare, the glint in Jaehyun’s eyes darkened. He gulped at the revealing sight of you, brushing his hair back to restrain himself.

None of you could utter a single word, only the vivacious rain being the only sounds ringing around you. Thus, you allowed your actions to pursue precisely what you desired to do.

Taking baby steps towards him to test the waters, he met you right in the center and closed the leftover space. His hands cradled your face, whilst yours clung to his chest. His lips tasted like red wine, watching him pour in a glass for himself earlier. He did offer, yet you declined.

Your tongue darted his lower lip, gaining access after. Sensing the edge of his bed, you plopped yourself down the cushion. His knee urged your legs to widen, letting his body slide in. From your face, his fingers lowered to the back of your bra, snapping the clasps open.

“It takes skill to accomplish that in one try, Jaehyun.”

“I lived in Paris too, ma chérie. You out of all people would understand and have the experience.”

His palms massaged your freed breasts, throwing your head back even more to his pillows as his lips ravaged down from your stomach until the fabric of your not-so pure panties.

“Call me that again, please.”

“Ma chérie, seras-tu mienne?” (My darling, will you be mine?) He kissed and licked the tiny ribbon in front repeatedly, where your now-swollen clit laid. It electrified your bones, pulling on to his ruffled hair.

“Tu peux m'avoir.” (You can have me.)

Sex in the form of one-night stands were all you’ve invested; upcoming artists like you weren’t capable to maintain long-term relationships. Les plans à trois even if you’re extra freaky or drunk from the afterparties of your events. All that these occurrences had in common were not seeing those men ever again after sneaking out of their apartments in the morning.

This time, it’s different.

When they said that doing the deed with someone you’re romantically entangled with was more special, they didn’t bluff. You could plan bits of your life, but it can sometimes change aspects of it when you least expect it. Sometimes for the best or the worst, but right now, it went beyond your expectations.

It’s rewarding that the man you’ve slowly fallen for within your stay returned your affections.

Around late 3 am that night, your brain jolted with artistic ideas that awoken your sonorous rest. There are no hopes of sleeping them off because they tend to bother you for hours until you do something about it. But you’re already so cozy having Jaehyun’s arms around you, skin to skin under the duvet. His lips daunted right above your forehead, recalling his endless kisses there that helped you fall asleep.

Well, these ideas don’t work themselves unless you do. Untangling him tactfully, you stepped out of the blanket and wore one of his long white shirts he gave you earlier before pulling out your sketchpad and palette of oil paints.

Luckily, there was still one available candle to use as the rest have melted indefinitely. You slid the matchstick again to the sand surface, boring a flame from the friction which you placed on top of the wick.

All your ideas that night leaned towards one thing, or person rather: Jaehyun.

You spent a few minutes retracing how he vividly looked at the picnic, leaning back from the chair of his work desk. His outfit of a turquoise turtleneck underneath a white button-top with trousers matching the said turtleneck looked good together, how his ears tingled red after you complimented his newfound inspiration for his book, and the prominent veins in his arms when he rolled his sleeves due to the heat.

The thin brush you held defined the shape of his face, then paying attention to the messy strands of his hair. Stroking in a circular way to outline his eyelids, a hoarse grunt disturbed the peaceful silence.

“Get back in bed, ma chérie.” His eyes drowsily opened, lying on his side. The moment he no longer felt your warmth, he worried something happened. Instead, you’re working late at night after quite a rough yet romantic night.

“Shush,” You shunned him down with your index finger. “Give me a few more minutes.”

“Perhaps, are you painting me?” He hunched from the covers. “Your eyes looking back and forth would never lie to me, would they?”

“Maybe…” You teased, batting your eyes at him without any risky intentions. Or not?

He deeply chuckled, sluggishly removing himself under the covers. In his pure nudity, he advanced himself towards you. You shrieked, covering yourself with your free hand.

“Jaehyun, stay back! I told you I’ll be there soon!”

Not listening, he carried your bridal style, making you drop your precious palette to the fur rug. Laying you carefully, he popped each button open. By the sight of his cock hardening again, you knew you were in for another round with him.

“Wet again, ma chérie? Oh, this will be fun.”

Fin de juillet 1957

So this kind of summer romance concept that everyone fantasized about… it became your present.

Together you’d stroll in the smaller streets and immerse yourselves in the unique culture of the village. Whenever anyone saw you together, holding hands, biking, or what-not, they’d praise in the name of love for bringing you both together. A romance like yours in the countryside was a lively sight.

Remember how extensions were a possibility if your search for inspiration wasn’t found? Well, it’s not a question that you’d make one, except inspiration found you instead. And he had one arm around you as he slow danced with you in the open grounds of the village, listening to the live band covering song classics.

In particular, Chet Baker. He was Jaehyun’s favorite artist at the moment.

There was an ongoing week-long festival dedicated to summer, giving more plants their bloom and spreading gratitude to the hardworking people. Especially the students, off on their break.

The faint radiance from the post lights as Jaehyun swayed you around, making you laugh as he tried to mumble the lyrics of the song. All those glasses of wine he tried earlier with you from the bartender offering it for free had its effects, and you weren’t off the hook from them either.

Blisters started to form from your ankles, adjusting to the new pair of heels Jaehyun gave (or insisted to buy) you a while ago after staring at them like lasers. You’ve always provided things for yourself that being spoiled by someone else felt weird to you.

“If there’s anything you want me to buy for you, just tell me.”

“How can I buy you if you’re already mine?”

His smooth talk often made you punch his shoulder, but it’s just a mechanism to hide the exhilaration.

Under each other’s spells in your dance, you laid your head on Jaehyun’s chest. Feeling the strong beat of his heart, you were reminded of how much life he’s filled with. And you became a part of it, in the same way he crossed yours.

Jaehyun’s lips sank to the top of your head, pecking it affectionately. The first-ever summer where he wasn’t stuck at his desk working or drinking his life away with his rich friends in their Parisian homes, it couldn’t get better than this.

“Oiii! Flirtez ailleurs!” (Oiii! Flirt somewhere else!) The distinct voice of Jaemin, handing out pastries to passersby, shouted at the both of you, making you flip your middle finger at him.

“Trouve une copine d’abord, d’accord?!” (Find a girlfriend first, alright?!) You shouted back jokingly, almost falling due to the ache of your feet. Your immodest behavior was censored by Jaehyun’s large palms, not wanting the kids around to see it. Whispering closely to your ear,

“Tu es ivre. Laisse-moi te ramener chez toi.” (You’re drunk. Let me take you home.)

You changed back into your sandals as Jaehyun led you through the different alleys. Your vision was too hazy to navigate, so he had one arm wrapped around your shoulders. The weather grew cold too, shivering your bones so he draped you in his blazer.

“Wait,” You stopped, making him do the same. But before he could ask for your reason, your hands yanked him by his suspenders and your legs walked backward to reach the brick wall. Standing in his 5’11 glory, you were overpowered.

Yet your lips captured his effortlessly, raising to your toes to press yourself closer to him. He moved fast, one arm hugging your waist while the other hoisted your leg up. Tangling around his waist, the urge to move your hips against his crotch couldn’t be contained any longer.

Everyone was probably still out at this time or sleeping. The sloppy sounds you’ve produced were beyond suitable for any audience. Not to mention, the nasty words Jaehyun’s pretty mouth spoke in your ears desired you to fall to your knees.

“Not afraid of getting caught, ma chérie? You want me to ruin you right here, right now?”

“God, Jaehyun,” Your hands tugged his belt forward, the friction it gave to your core twitched the naughty side out of you. “Do it, please.”

The idea of public sex thrilled your mind into overdrive, yet you’ve never done it. In Paris, a city where several people started to know your name, you didn’t need a scandal to be plastered in your resume yet.

Jaehyun himself included, and still opted not to give it to you.

“Another time, ma chérie. Your apartment, now.”

The moment you unlocked your apartment door, Jaehyun was far from gentle like in the mansion. Ripping you out of your frilly dress didn’t take long, so was unbuttoning his trousers down to the floor.

On your knees, his hand gave you a makeshift ponytail as your tongue flicked the slit of his cock. Then slowly taking him inch by inch on your mouth, you’d let out a loud pop when you needed to breathe. Your hands fondling his balls, he groaned from the edge of your bed and tightened his hold on you. Tears formulated in your eyes as you got to swallow him whole, uncontrollably bobbing your head.

He felt like putty when he released, your throat taking the salty base. You hastily unhooked your bra in front of him when suddenly, his hand flicked on the fabric of your panties, cueing you to stop your motion.

“Keep them on when you ride me.”

Straddling on his lap, his head laid against the headboard of his bed. His arms roaming around your back to stabilize you, your fingers pushed your panties to the side as you pushed yourself down his protected length. Your moans became shaky. Up and down, you bounced while bracing on his shoulders.

Against his ear, your moans were harmonious. His hips moved against your beat, hitting your g-spot like the sexual ace he is. His thumb rubbing your clit, you shuttered your eyes at the impending high approaching you like a bus.

“I’m close.” You choked out, the overstimulation overwhelming your nerves.

“Fuck, me too.” He grunted, slapping your butt that made you shriek.

Soon enough, everything hit you both all at once. The knot snapped, and so did your body falling on his chest after a single scream. Panting, Jaehyun pecked on your temple as his cock softened up. Once you returned to your senses, you lifted yourself from his length, laying bare beside him.

His eyes started to fall, but before they did, he muttered huskily. “Je t’aime, (Y/N).”

It was the first time he’s said those words in the way they meant, and he’s more than certain that it’s what he felt with you. Sure, it started as mutual infatuation, but now, it can’t leave. Not on his watch.

Love was a concept unfamiliar to you, but Jaehyun slowly taught you what it was and how it felt like. Books and films may give sneak peeks, but to personally give and receive it back was made possible by him.

From this moment on, you could conclude that yes, you reciprocated it.

“Je t’aime aussi, Jaehyun.”

16 octobre 1957

Autumn made its way to the countryside.

The leaves switched into red-brown shades, the weather in the south was warmer, and the wine harvest was highly anticipated. Jaehyun’s camera was a common item in your outings, taking as many photos as he could so the two of you had something to look back on.

Planned and candid, his range was wide. These were moments that proved that your youth was as happy as you wished it to be. You wouldn’t trade it for anything else.

Painting in his mansion was a regular thing, having new canvases prepared at his patio. There were so many items that amused you there like you could base your entire collection on his home. It’s not like Jaehyun could argue; it meant more time with you whenever you came over.

“Jaehyun, if you smudge paint on me, so help me Go-” He refused to listen to your “threats”, smearing black paint on your cheek.

“You were saying?” He cockily pestered, showcasing his paint-filled fingers. You dipped one of your brushes into the new paint and chased after him without hesitation. The entire evening became a paint war, a laugh fit even after seeing your reflections in the mirror. But before you could clean yourself, Jaehyun’s camera was by your face and he pressed the button.

“Still breathtaking.”

But the middle of the season arrived, that’s where your planned extension you’ve reached its end. The exhibit was next month, getting calls from your boss regarding your return and the paintings you’ll present. You informed her that you already had them mailed to your studio way back, so there’s nothing much to worry about.

All your bags were packed in the private car Jaehyun rented. Here, you’re bidding your goodbyes to every friend you’ve made outside the doors of your apartment complex, saving your last words with Jaehyun.

The night before, he stayed over and helped you pack your last items in luggage bags. He even brought extra clothes for you so you wouldn’t work extra. You’ve talked it out the whole evening through what happens next to ease your worries. In your bed, he opened the wide windows and pulled you under the sheets.

“Write to me.”

“Call me when you’re free, or whenever you feel like it.”

Leaning against the railing of the stairs, watched the sorrow in your face over this parting. He sensed how bittersweet everything was, but he wouldn’t change anything about it. He’s positive that your story won’t end here, not right now.

Sauntering to him, you sighed whilst taking your bag he held the whole time from him. His touch was tighter as the two of you hugged tenderly, nuzzling his head on your shoulder. The scent of his citrus cologne that implanted in your brain felt comforting, despite the uncertainty of everything between you.

You hinted a minty taste from the menthol candies from his home as his lips brushed yours, colliding it timely. He waited when everyone left, relishing these last seconds.

Stepping inside the vehicle, you waved your summer love farewell one more time before the driver hit the pedal. Your eyes couldn’t stray away from looking back, the distance between him and your former apartment widening. Only when he was no longer in the frame, you shifted your focus back in front.

Your fingers fiddled with the charm bracelet he gifted you from the market. It was custom-made by a jeweler who was great friends with his mother in his younger years. There were two pendants chained on it: a paintbrush and the sun.

“A paintbrush to remind you of your passion, and the sun to remind you of the summer we first met.”

The man was like one of his romance books, in human form. He knew how to catch your breath effortlessly.

Your stay, for now, may have concluded, but there was always next summer. And the ones after that. The village felt like a second home, one you can’t neglect like the other places you’ve lived. Then having Jaehyun here, the more reasons to return.

Undoubtedly the best vacation you’ve ever been in your adult years, one that didn’t sacrifice for your art so you could compete with other artists. The weight on your chest poofed into thin air, and you felt ready for what the next steps as a painter were.

Appreciating the greenery you passed by, you peeked over the side mirror of the car only to find Jaehyun quickly biking in your direction.

Now, what was he up to?

You instantly requested the driver to slow down his pace, rolling down the window of the car. Not caring about the strong winds, “You fool, what are you doing?!”

Although he trusted your last words, he had the greed to see your face again. It would be a long time until he’ll see you in person again. So he pedaled as fast he could to still reach you. Oh, the things you do when you’re in love.

“Mon cœur bat la chamade pour toi, (Y/N)!” [My heart beats loudly for you, (Y/N)!]

You giggled at his silliness, throwing out flying kisses.

“Je reviendrai bientôt, Jaehyun!” (I’ll come back soon, Jaehyun!)

21 octobre 1957

Only your friends at the studio gave you a warm welcome back, receiving comments like “get back to work” from your first encounter with your boss. Popping a champagne glass open after work hours on the rooftop of your studio, they interrogated you with all the questions they could think of.

“So this village in Provence…. was it beautiful as the tourists said?” Ten, who moved from his home in Thailand to Paris at a young age, expressed his curiosity whilst leaning against the railing overlooking the Eiffel Tower.

“Beautiful is an understatement, Ten. I miss it dearly!” You heaved a sigh, twirling your glass.

“So this inspiration you were looking for…” Amélie, your dear friend since your university days, created some tension as she prolonged her last word. Playfulness twinkled in her eyes, crossing her legs. “Was a person involved by any chance?”

For a moment, your throat almost gagged on the sizzling alcohol going down.

“What do you mean?” You acted clueless, pouring your now empty glass with more booze. But the moment Ten gave you the troublesome look coordinating with Amélie, you already knew you wouldn’t hear the end of it. These two were such gossips in and out of the studio.

Ten took the seat across you on the table and leaked all his pent-up information.

“So you know Seo Youngho, the only son of the Seo family. Rich, socialite, a total hotshot… yeah, all that jazz.” He dived in, seeing you nod over knowing that man. Someone in the past you’ve slept with, but that’s another story. “Well, Amelie and I attended one of his parties at his large penthouse. He had his usual crowd there; Kim Doyoung, Lee Taeyong, Nakamoto Yuta, and Lee Minhyung. But fun fact: there’s another member in that friend group who doesn’t go to these kinds of events.”

“Here’s where it gets interesting,” Amélie excitedly took off like the pipelette (chatterbox) she is. “Youngho, who was talking to us for a bit, asked where you’ve run off. Poor him, he must’ve missed you in his bed but anyway! We told him that you went down south somewhere in Provence for a break. Oddly enough, he mentioned how the mentioned member moved back there for the same reason.”

Ten and Amélie gave each other another frisky look, merely to piss you off. So predictable of them.

“Get to the point please!” You screeched.

“Jeong Jaehyun, ever heard of him?” Amélie imitated your tone of voice. “I mean, you should since you made a whole painting of him.”

“H-How,” Speechless, that’s what you were. Ten went on a fit of giggles, signaling the build-up of his intoxication.

“Youngho visited the studio to find a specific painting for his home, and we helped him in choosing. Then when your deliveries of paintings arrived that day and were unwrapped, the look on his face when he saw Jaehyun’s painting was priceless. Things started to add up, especially when he told us that he called up Jaehyun prior, he said that Jaehyun was seeing a girl during his stay there.”

“A young, burnt-out painter from Paris, to be specific.”

They’ve put you on the edge of the cliff, and it was too close to call it a coincidence. Of all things to be revealed, this had to be the first.

“Well, I was waiting for another time to tell you guys about him though.”

Their gasps of joy could give you guys a noise complaint by the neighbors, telling all about your escapades of him and you. During it, the more you missed seeing him daily either on his bike or his car. It was stuck in your routine, but now it’s reverted to your old one.

Could the next summer come any faster?

14 février 1958

Perhaps your newest collection at the Louvre was your most successful one yet.

Entitled “Inspirez, Expirez” (Breathe In, Breathe Out), your sceneries during your stay in the village varied. An old couple slow dancing under the night sky, and the quiet district of shops Jaehyun took you, those were some of your last additions.

A multitude of positive reviews on the newspapers and art magazines came in, commending on taking on a fresher, brighter outlook for a change whilst finding your spark again. As fulfilling it was, what you longed the most was the one responsible for it.

Lately, it’s been tough to contact him. His maids always answered the calls, informing you that he was busy with work or family matters. It’s so rare for him to act like this. Whatever it was, it wasn’t grand or serious hopefully.

Back to your collection, tonight was the last night of it. Just in time for Valentine’s day, where numerous socialite lovers embarked on this event, but you’re more fixated that it was also Jaehyun’s birthday. A boy full of love born on the day dedicated for it, things made more sense. In case, you’ve sent your birthday wishes to him through letter and passing the message to one of his maids. Even on his special day, he hasn’t reached out to you.

But to momentarily forget about that, there was a closing ceremony held for this exhibit with the other artists involved, and it was your turn to give your final remarks. More esteemed socialites and journalists were present, which didn’t halt your nerves the slightest. You were a professional after all, holding pride in your craft as you stood in front of the microphone wearing your new favorite custom-made gown.

There are perks when you have close friends in the fashion industry, specifically Kim “Key” Kibum from the House of Key. After defending him from a disrespectful client when you were picking up a dress for your boss during your internship years, not only did you earn his respect, but an invite to his shows and first claiming of new items from his collections. Dining in expensive restaurants in the metro was a plus, catching up on your lives. Sometimes calling each other out for your sexcapades too.

Speaking of him, he was in the crowd that night, ordering every photographer to take photos of your gorgeous self in one of his dresses. Or in your opinion, bribing some by how he stuffed a few thick stacks of Euro bills down their pockets.

Only one of it ever made. A dark green satin v-neck off-the-shoulder gown, where diamonds adorned your neck and ears and white stilettos kept your perfect balance. Also courtesy of Key.

Because it’s the winter season, he gifted you a limited edition white fur coat every socialite tried getting their hands on. Your hair was styled in a bun, emphasizing your dark tinted lips from this new lipstick Amelie insisted you buy.

Most people would get the first impression that you were one of the socialites, a child from one of the affluent families even. But you were a lot more remarkable than that, having inborn talent in the arts that you specialized over your youth and rising to the top without any parental help.

“Thank you to everyone for their endless support towards the magnificent collections of each artist present. As for mine, I am grateful to rechannel my creative side by taking a break. Rather than romanticizing overworking our bones to the core, there’s nothing wrong with taking a step back from the pressure. Being alive is a blessing, realizing further how our youth won’t stay with us forever. Being away from the boisterous cities, I found relaxation in the countryside of Provence.”

Your lips quirked into a grin as every single memory during that time reeled in your head like a movie. “The beauty of Provence cannot be simply put in words. The muses I’ve encountered were more than lovely, especially the man behind the Poetic Rose. With that, I sincerely thank everyone from my bottom of my heart and I hope to continue to support me in the years to come.”

The applause roared once you stepped down the platform, shaking hands with every esteemed guest with more gratitude as they praised you. These days, socializing with them was a lot easier. You’ve even taken more initiative to greet people first before they do, conversing with them easily about anything.

Key definitely noticed that as you toured him around your section, holding his nth glass of wine for the night.

“You, Madame (Y/N), transformed into a social butterfly.” He nudged your shoulder, smirking once he got a better view of his favorite painting from you. “I guess that’s the thing when you’re in love.”

“I beg your pardon?”

With this free hand, he motioned it up and down at the painting in front of you. “The Poetic Rose is none other than the youngest son of the Jeong family, whom I’ve met through his older sister, Krystal.”

“Am I really the only one who doesn’t know him?!” You stressed, jokingly. Key was elated to capture you in his trap, the changes of your personality too evident in his eyes. Figuring it out that it was love took a while, but being acquainted with Krystal, she’s the one who told him that her younger brother was in love with a painter in Provence. Do the math.

“I’ve met him through his older sister, one of my highly favored clients. He’s not much of a socialite like her, so I don’t really blame you for that.”

Searching for a waiter to refill your wine glasses, a surprise emerged the both of you.

“Madame Krystal, you’re absolutely stunning.”  Key complimented her, giving the engaged heiress of Jeong Tea Inc. kisses on the cheek as respect. Her recent engagement to Kim Donghyun, her childhood sweetheart and also the heir of Kim Couture, was the talk of the town.

They arrived at the event together, drawing the attention of everyone in the room earlier. Now, he was speaking to a few influential socialites he made a deal with this week about the art collections present.

“Key, you never fail to look fantastic,” She remarked positively, poking his necktie before placing her undivided attention on you. “So you must be (Y/N) (Y/L/N). You’re beyond bewildering in that gown.”

“Flattered to hear that, Madame Krystal. Such a pleasure to meet you.”

The three of you chatted as if you were the only people there. From art, passion, and love, pride filled in your chest when you toured your collection. It was like walking down memory lane for her, adding out how she used to climb the peach tree with her younger brother during their childhood. Once her eyes laid on Poetic Rose, she took her time admiring it.

“My younger brother grew up well. That’s all I could ever hope for as his only older sister.” She paused, noticing how silent you became when you stared at the painting along with her. She observed the passion lit in your eyes, yet there was longing behind it by the way your lips pouted briefly. “You must really love him, do you?”

“I do, truly. After meeting him, not only was I boosted with so much ideas, but my heart embraced him for what and who he is in this universe.” You professed confidently, earning an approving smile from Krystal.

“If that’s how you feel, why not tell him that yourself?”

Her fingers gestured you to turn around. Stood in a grey suit with his brown hair slicked back, it was like seeing a completely new person. A handsome one though. His fashion in the countryside heavily differed from his fashion in the cities. So sophisticated and refined, he looked like a prince straight out of a fairytale.

Your fairytale.

“Jaehyun.”

It’s like everything stopped once he sprinted towards you, pulling you off your feet for a snug hug. Your arms threw themselves on his neck by instinct, not wasting a single second in his grasp. Your nose inhaled the woody scent of his cologne, something more formal than his usual fruity scent.

The smell of aftershave in his jaw couldn’t go ignored either, assuming that he must have had plans to go out tonight. Nonetheless, you squealed as if you were back in Provence, giggling at his boldness. Once he put you down, neither of you could get your hands off each other.

“What are you doing here? You didn’t tell me you’d be in Paris!” Clutching your waist, you gazed at him with doe-like eyes, instilling confusion.

“J’ai voulu te surprendre, my chérie.” (I wanted to surprise you, my darling.)

He chuckled, pushing some straying strands of your hair behind your ear. His eyes evoked so much endearment towards this elegant look you prepared, making his heart race as if he were in the gardens of his manor again.

Hearing his petname for you again attacked your heart every time no matter how much time passed, he lifted your chin high. Jaehyun urged himself to kiss you senseless right there, leaning lower. And yes, you anticipated it by how your eyes instantly closed.

Only if it weren’t for Krystal to clear her throat, obviously ruining the mood. Flinching away from your sensual lover, you rubbed the nape of your neck. Towards an heiress like her, it must’ve been unprofessional.

“Couldn’t you at least wait until I left, younger brother?” Her fingers flicked Jaehyun’s forehead, a teasing trick they used to do as kids. Even if she was a lot shorter now, it didn’t mean the impact was weak. He cursed under his breath, covering his forehead.

Stifling your laughter was a failure, crinkling your eyes to unleash your emotions. So this is what their sibling dynamic was like?

“Now excuse me, older sister. You didn’t tell me you were visiting the exhibit after my birthday dinner with our parents?” He crossed his arms, exchanging a judgmental look. For his sake, he wanted to maintain his pride. “All you said after dinner was that you were going straight home with your fiancé after all the alcohol mother gave you because it made you lightheaded.”

“Well, you know Key and his persuasiveness. He insisted I attend this event last minute because all the collections were amazing.” She explained, shedding a subtle glance at you. “Plus, it’s an excuse to finally meet this lovely girl you raved so much through your letters.”

Jaehyun kept his family life private, so this piece of information was new to you. The unpredicted way the fluttering feeling drew in your stomach, all you could do was smile from the flattery.

“He spoke about me to you?”

“More than speak, my dear. He practically professed his love for you, asking me advice on how to court a girl, make them smile, etcetera. You’re the first girl he’s been this affectionate with, and I completely understand now.” She patted your shoulder, hopeful. She had such a strong older sister vibe, reminding you of your older siblings back home. “You’re a clever, talented woman. I look forward to seeing you more often.”

As you nodded in approval, she turned towards her brother with her recurring teasing look. “Yah, Jaehyun. You better take care of her. If she ever sheds a tear because of you, I’m hunting you down in the gardens.”

“Harsh of you, Krystal.” He planted his hand on his chest, feigning pain. “But no worries. Having you and mother around me kept me well-mannered towards women growing up.”

Playfulness aside, Krystal felt honored towards her younger brother. Men these days maintained their sexist beliefs and rudeness, especially those who doubted her high position in the family business once her father stepped down. Nowadays, it’s men like Jaehyun who could really challenge the patriarchy and make women pursue a lot more than being limited as a housewife.

“I’ll keep that in mind. Now please excuse me, I’ll be on my way.”

Krystal waltzed her way out without tripping from her slight intoxication, which Jaehyun worried about earlier. But anyway, that left him alone with you. Filled with so many questions, you didn’t know where to start.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming to Paris? Why didn’t you acknowledge my birthday wishes to you? Why aren’t you answering my calls and letters?” You blurted without wasting a breath, weren’t trying to come off as needy, but it became peculiar when he was contacting you like usual.

You pushed off thinking of the worst scenarios, not wanting it to ruin your drive and your emotions either. Yet you trusted Jaehyun enough to know he wasn’t the type of person either.

“Okay slow down, ma chérie.” His hands maneuvered for you to stop for a bit. “Ask me one by one and I’ll give you a solid answer for each while we roam around.”

He arrived in Paris last week, which was initially for work. Then his birthday clashing was a coincidence. It would be too lonely to go home and celebrate his special day alone, so he extended. But again, it’s his work that caused his abrupt contact.

When you were too busy delving into the success of recovering your inspiration, he also found his spur to write again too. Day and night, his mind kept him tedious with an endless trail of thoughts and words. Overall, he finalized it then brought the end product to the same publishing house where his books in the past went through.

In fact, he decided to publish them specifically today on his birthday. The only day in his itinerary he planned, where after publishing, he’d hang out with his friends, have dinner with his family then run off to reunite with you.

“I didn’t intend to make you feel like a second choice, so please forgive me for that, ma chérie.”

“All is forgiven, Jaehyun.” You held both his hands, kissing them tenderly out of habit. “I’m overjoyed that you rekindled your creative side again.”

You were so understanding and empathetic, and Jaehyun aimed to act that way too. He learned so much from you as his friend before being his lover. Quickly enough, you’re both back to his portrait in the center. Like a critic, he narrowed his eyes and scrunched his nose. Tapping his chin with his finger,

“This man in Poetic Rose, he’s quite dashing.” He commented with conceit, walking closer to it to view it better. “His freckles are on point, his dimples and dazzling eyes too. Why exactly is he described as a Poetic Rose?”

“Well sir,” You stood beside him, imitating his actions. “This man here always spoke so eloquently, like he had a very poetic approach on life. He reminded me also of a rose by his rosy tinted cheeks and his beauty. He was alluring inside and out.”

“Is he your favorite muse?”

“I never quoted him as a muse because he’s more than that. Muses can be replaced once they no longer serve purpose towards the artist. Though with him, he’s the never-ending flame that I want to keep for the rest of time."

You held on to his hand, interlocking your fingers with his. The apparent reddening of his ears proved that he was flustered, yet you spoke no lies.

“Joyeux anniversaire, ma flamme.” (Happy birthday, my flame.)

“Merci beaucoup, ma chérie.” (Thank you, my darling.)

Something about his new release piqued your attention so you brought it up again.

“So tell me about your new book.”

“Let me show you instead.” Inside the blazer, there was an inner pocket that sealed a small hardbound book. Taking it out, he handed it over to you. “This is your copy.”

The cover of the book had an illustration of two young adults running down the fields under the bright sun, with the title written in cursive and placed in the center.

“L’Été de 1957.” (The Summer of 1957.)

Like a child who received a new gift in the mail, you flipped the book open. Seeing the table of contents and credits to other important people involved in the process, there was a detailed dedication right before the starting chapter. It’s an unexpected page, noticing that he never put anything like this in his last works.

“Pour ma chérie, qui a peint les couleurs manquantes de ma vie.” (For my darling, who painted the missing colors of my life.)

Although Jaehyun planned to write about the couples he met in the countryside, he chose to change his perspective. Instead, he based this new book on your summer romance, installing more original characters who made your romance blossom more.

“I was once so engaged in listening to people’s love stories, hung up on what they felt.” He expounded, pacing around the floor whilst you skimmed through the pages. There were black and white photos from your adventures too to wrap the reader further in the story.

“While I was struggling to find the next story, I realized late that my story with you was a perfect choice. When I fell in love with you, it’s like I didn’t have to fret anymore about anything. Everything slowly yet surely aligned into place for me. Like how we found inspiration in each other.”

A poetic speaker meant having a poetic, wise mind. You kept an open mind whenever Jaehyun shared his thoughts on life with you, an intimate time that didn’t require using your bodies. Whether you were stargazing or drinking wine by his patio, his soulful personality never changed.

“So I recapped every single memory we had and compiled them,” He resumed, taking a closer step towards yours. His warm hands grasped your waist again, catching a glimpse of your astonished face. Mostly, towards your lips that he missed feeling against his.

“This book expressed my own take on love this time, the one I want to grow in.”

You’d care less if you dropped the book and your coat right there, your major desire to kiss him again was driving your senses to the edge of a cliff. Nothing could’ve braced yourself the second you fervently collided your lips with his. It didn’t feel like you were in this exhibit, but somewhere back in his mansion engulfed in each other’s presence.

Your legs almost melted by your daring move, if it weren’t for Jaehyun’s arm moving upwards to your back to stabilize you more. Your body tingled with goosebumps due to his relaxing fingers all over your body. His tongue caved in your lips, and you couldn’t ban its access.

Such an explicit sight, it felt forbidden as you were inches away from the public crowd. Yet it was the least of your worries if they made a big fuss over it. Jaehyun was here again with you, and that was more valuable to you. He savored every trace of your touches, taking his delicate time with you. No past birthday could defeat this, especially when it’s the first one to celebrate with you. The first of many.

As much you wanted to keep this up for hours, your lungs started feeling constricted of air so your lips timidly let go. Though your hands couldn’t, your overwhelmed eyes couldn’t shift away from the heart-stopping view of your lover. Wherein even after such a fearless session, his eyes fused with love and need with his plumper lips.

“Everything about Provence, especially you, that’s the life I want.” You confessed this concealed secret that’s revolved your head for a while now. Yet its certainty was true.

“Are you sure, ma chérie? What about work?” As an artist, he believed you should stay where everything is accessible. Yet as his woman, he wanted you to follow your heart. Jaehyun didn’t want you to choose or struggle.

“I’ve grown out from the idea that the city life was the only life meant of an artist like me.” You replied, confident enough to discuss it after deep thought. “Cities like Paris hold exciting, vigorous flames that will have you clinging on to them. But then, they’ll eventually die the longer you stay. You get burned in the process too. However, I stand by what I said earlier. I found an endless flame when I met and began loving you, Jaehyun. It doesn’t sting at all; it illuminates strongly every living day.”

Urging him to lower his stance with your fingers, you stated one last phrase. “Wherever you are, that’s where I want to be.”

“If that’s the case,” Jaehyun acknowledged, sticking his arm out for you. “Let’s get out of here.”

Astounded expressions crowded the socialites in the event as they watched the both of you exit together. If the news of Krystal and Donghyun weren’t crazy enough, some journalists figured the mysterious man behind The Poetic Rose and spread it like wildfire.

How was the youngest son of the Jeong family turned renowned romance novel author connected to the impressive, up-and-coming painter from London?

What really went down in Provence?

“How can you miss out on the signs? Did you not see them share a kiss earlier?” Key protested to those who weren’t approving whatever relationship you guys had. He loved his tea but hated those who simply were money hungry. Wanting a chance to be a part of the rich family, only to fish them out of their riches sooner or later.

Meanwhile, the winter season didn’t stop any of you from roaming the streets of Paris. Moments like these were a preview of the future you’ve envisioned with Jaehyun. Youthful, free, and fiery, a love between two artists created more magic not just in their crafts but to those around them.

Promenading a street overlooking the Seine River, Jaehyun took out a smaller instant camera from his pocket and took a candid shot of you. Stunned, you slapped his chest with your bag.

“Hey! Just how many more things are hidden in your blazer?”

“Just my wallet and a few condoms. Why’d you ask?” He raised a suggestive brow, feigning good intentions.

You hummed, faking your deep thought mindset. “At this rate, I don’t think we’ll make it back to my apartment alive.”

Jaehyun tugged you by your coat, his lips hovering your ear to whisper. “If we call a cab right now, I can finger you in the backseat.”

You chuckled at his vulgar idea, but it seemed ideal. You loved the thrill of getting caught or having someone overhearing you two, just like him. Besides, his fingers don’t match up to yours when you touch yourself alone in your apartment. You bat your eyelashes, giving in.

“Deal.”

6 ans plus tard (1964)

Summer returned, the sun strongly smiling down to the plentiful flowers at your family garden. By the patio of your home, your canvas was already laid by the easel stand. Shades of yellow were applied first to symbolize the brightness of the day, following the outline of your desired scenery for this piece.

Dipping the brush in water to change colors, you took another glance at the breezy sky. Light blue with clouds resembling soft pillows, you inhaled gently as your brush faintly stroked the canvas again.

Your hair was tied in a bun, meaning that you’re in for a busy session. But a more soothing one as the jazz music flowed from the vinyl player inside. Stress was the last thing you needed right now.

“What’s madame artiste up to right now?” Your husband piped in from behind, placing down a tray of tea and crackers. With some top buttons of his white top left unattended, you glimpsed on his toned chest when he leaned down. But you mustn’t pry whilst working, even when temptation was calling your name repeatedly.

“The summer sunshine healed me of my discomfort, so I think it’s about time I painted again.” You chewed on the snack, looking back and forth to the view. As enchanting as all the flowers you and him planted over the years grew, you’re more amused by a little boy strolling around it with his magnifying glass and tiny wooden basket with his furry puppy by his side.

His tiny legs often troubled the two of you because he enjoyed spending time with nature. Only God knows what he found in the garden this time.

“Adrien est explorer encore. Devrais-je lui dire qu’il change de place, ma chérie?” (Adrien is exploring again. Should I tell him to change places, my darling?) Jaehyun cautiously asked, not wanting his 3 year old son to impair your perspective.

“Non,” (No,) You held on to his hand, kissing it sweetly. Although you peeved any unnecessary details found in your scenery in the past, Adrien was an exception. As his mother, it’s hard to say no to him unless necessary.

“Il est un garçon curieux, alors il devrait explorer et flâner où il veut.” (He’s a curious boy, so he should explore and wander wherever he wants.)

Life ever since you returned to the countryside shifted into something more precious than you imagined. From moving places constantly, you found a home to settle in for good. A home with overflowing love and inspiration. A home within Jeong Jaehyun.

Recently, you halted your work-related activities in Paris and came home because you were heavily homesick. It even affected your health as a whole. So you made adjustments with your schedules, postponing appearances to events to next year.

On the plus side, you could be more active as a mother to Adrien. It felt like you burdened Jaehyun to take care of Adrien most of the time because he mainly worked from home, wherein important people who wanted to meet him would have to fly out to the countryside.

Back and forth to Paris, your presence towards Adrien often lacked. Here came your biggest fear, which was Adrien forgetting you. But Jaehyun told you over and over again that it wasn’t the case. As he listened to every wrenching thought you had, but he’d combat it with heartfelt words of reassurance so you wouldn’t overanalyze things.

He vowed to love and take care of you when times get hard, and he will continue doing so.

Remember when you said how his mansion felt too big?

It no longer did after getting married.

It gave more room to grow and breathe more life into it. When Adrien was born, he was the prime reflection of your and Jaehyun’s love. He mirrored his father’s physical traits but with a daring personality like yours. A perfect mixture, the world worked amazingly to bring a boy like him into your life.

“Maman! Papa!” Adrien bolted to where you and Jaehyun stood. From the clothes he wore, it’s very much clear that his father was in charge of it whilst you slept in the entire morning. Suspenders, capri shorts, a white shirt, and a red beret, he deserved his title as Jaehyun’s mini-me.

Jaehyun swelled with pride and love for his only son, peeking over what he brought to show and tell you both. “Oh Adrien, what do you have for us today?”

In his basket, there were 3 sunflowers stuck out from the edge. It’s been a while since you’ve seen some in full bloom, lowering your stance to get a more vivid view. He took them out to hand them to you and your husband.

One flower for Jaehyun and two for you. You let out a gasp, scrunching your brows to the center. He always gave one of each item to you and Jaehyun, never more or less.

“Ooh, deux fleurs pour Maman. Pourquoi, Rien?” (Ooh, two flowers for Mama. Why, Rien?) Jaehyun let his nickname out for his lips while you grasped his small hand.

“Well, I heard from Olivier next door that on his birthday, he gave extra flowers to his mother so he could have another sibling. And it worked!” He spoke so innocently, yet it hitched a choke from Jaehyun’s chest. Your eyes widened from disbelief. The information he collected due to his curiosity, no boundaries truly.

“Le mois prochain, c’est mon anniversaire. Je me demandais si je peux avoir un frère ou sœur comme Olivier? Tu es toujours occupée, comme Papa. Je ne veux plus être seul, alors je veux une amie aussi.” (It’s my birthday next month, and I was wondering if I can have a sibling like Olivier? You are always busy, like Papa. I don’t want to be alone anymore, so I want a friend too.)

You exchanged looks with Jaehyun, not knowing how exactly to respond. Although you and Jaehyun did agree that you wanted more than one child when you were younger, neither of you brought it up again since your careers were always loaded with plans.

Adrien was a surprise child actually, conceived on the night where you and Jaehyun celebrated after L’Été de 1957 was announced to be the best-selling romance novel of the decade in the country.

In Paris at his family home, where his parents brought out all their prized liquor, the two of you drank the entire night away to the point Krystal and Donghyun had to push you away from each other from your public affections because their children were present.

But it didn’t stop you two once you reached his bedroom, far away from everything and everyone. And you’ll never change it.

“Oh, Rien,” You eased in, consoling him. “Je suis désolé. Mais c’est franchement une grande demande, n'est-ce pas?” (I am sorry. But that’s quite a big request, right?)

“Mom and I will think about it first, okay? Another kid is a big responsibility, and you’ll be their older brother. That’s another important job, can you do it well?”

“Yes, I can, Papa!” He beamed with glee, his covered head patted by his father after. As you placed the sunflowers beside your palette, Adrien then proceeded to ask you if he could paint with you like old times.

Never you refuse especially with his sparkling round eyes and chubby face that makes you want to squish every time.

As you lifted his light body to sit on your lap, you placed your brush between his stubby fingers and carefully aimed in whatever angle seemed fit so the painting process would run smoothly and perfectly. He let out sounds of amazement when the strokes get bigger, jumping slightly too because the picture became more vivid. You’d smile and coo at him, commending whenever he followed instructions well. As his mother, you only encouraged your child in whatever they want to excel in.

Adrien was the child of two artists, so it was only natural that he had an artistic side in his veins.

Too caught up in your fun, hearing the automatic shutter of the camera from your side was delayed. The source was none other than Jaehyun hiding behind his camera. Jaehyun’s heart soared at the heavenly view of the most important people in his life, wanting to treasure the moment as a lovely memory.

“Hey!” You shouted, placing down the messy brush by the palette. “Je suis très laid!” (I am very ugly!)

“Shh! Tu est rayonnant, ma chérie. Papa est juste, Rien?” (Shh! You are glowing, my darling. Papa is right, Rien?)

Jaehyun politely quizzed the peppy boy, nodding excitedly. His dimples deeply showed up, the main trait he claimed from his father.

“Oui, papa! Maman est toujours belle!” (Yes, papa! Mama is always beautiful!)

He exclaimed, pecking your cheek numerously. You squealed, attacking him with tickles and kisses back. His shouts of delight, then he was suddenly carried by your tall husband in the air like he was flying in the sky. Adrien enjoyed that motion highly, ending up on Jaehyun’s shoulders shortly after to play by the garden again.

“Go paint. I’ll take care of him now.” Jaehyun persuaded, roaming through the long rows of flowers in full bloom. Though seconds after adding some strokes to your piece, you let down your hair, put a hat and sandals on, and ran to the cute duo to join them.

And that’s how your family spent the entire afternoon. By the garden, running around and taking photos and short videos from Jaehyun’s camera. Freezing these valuable memories, this was truly the life you loved so much.

After your break, you could convince the company you worked at that you’d prefer fewer trips to Paris and stay in the countryside longer. How badly you’ve wanted to hold your exhibits here instead. Plus like Jaehyun, let influential people visit you. You’ve already made a big name for yourself now, so that should be valid enough.

Dinner time passed by quickly too, eventually putting Adrien to a smooth slumber as you massaged the roots of his soft hair while Jaehyun sang him a lullaby. This was your joint parenting technique with him since he was a newborn, and it worked quickly as lightning.

You redressed into your silk nightgown after bringing your canvas to the master bedroom, opening the balcony doors to invite the cool breeze in. You tweaked some bits of your painting, including a silhouette of your small family. Regarding where to place it, probably by the living room as it matched the theme.

“What a spectacular day, don’t you think, ma chérie?” Jaehyun conversed, admiring the calm movements of your brush. He noticed a quirky smile grace your lips.

“It’s been a long time since we had quality time like that with Rien. He’s a feisty ball of energy these days.” You replied with a nostalgic daze. “It’s so crazy how one day, he was still crawling to us. Now, he could outrun the both of us.”

“Comme le temps passe vite, hmm?” (How time flies fast, hmm?) Nodding, nothing braced for what your husband had in mind. You almost dropped your brush mid-way. Jaehyun’s lips impatiently devoured your neck, his huge hands fondling your breasts. Violently throwing your head back against his chest, a needy moan parted your lips.

“Jae-” His touches reaching south to where you desired him highly, dampening hastily as your legs naturally spread apart. Rushed exhales, “À quoi tu penses maintenant?” (What are you thinking about right now?)

“Rien se sent seul,” (Rien feels alone,) His hot breath whispered against your ear, his fingers dangerously trailing your thin panties up and down. With your hands tightly clutching on his bicep,

“Alors, donnons-lui une amie.” (We should give him a friend.)

Ever since Adrien mentioned such a daring topic, it hasn’t left Jaehyun’s mind the whole day. After seeing you in utter bliss with your son earlier, he found you so majestic and radiant. It’s a different kind of happiness, especially for parents.

Now you went on hiatus, he thought that it was the right time to have another. He enjoyed his younger years with Krystal, and he wanted Adrien to experience it too. 3 years was quite a wait, and it seemed ideal to try again.

From his nude chest, you flipped around to intensely clash his lips with yours. Draping your arms behind his neck, Jaehyun lifted your entire figure from the chair. His hands gripping on your butt, he delicately lowered you down your bed.

Drowning into his sensual kisses with his hands all over you, this could prolong for hours. Reddening love marks started to resurface whilst your fingers tugged on the drawstring of his pajama pants. Jaehyun’s fingers dove under the fabric of your panties, his index finger rubbing figure 8s the sensitive bundle of nerves.

You struggled to swallow your moans, not wanting Rien to hear it. You wouldn’t want to repeat history, covering it as Jaehyun massaging you after a hard day.

“I know you want one too, ma chérie.” His fingers began to drape down the straps of your gown, presenting your breasts in its full, perky view. But before his lips could suck on your erect nipples, you parted momentarily from him and got up on your feet. Pulling up your straps again, Jaehyun simply laid down but he wasn’t pleased from how you left him hanging.

“Où vas-tu, ma chérie?” (Where are you going, sweetheart?)

He was growing impatient. You were never to interrupt such a sexy atmosphere ever.

From one of your drawers in your vanity table, an important, half-opened envelope was hidden. You were supposed to give it tomorrow but now seemed like a perfect time. Reading it as soon one of the maids handed it to you gave you the jitters, but in a positive way. Sitting back down on the edge of your bed, you exhilaratingly passed it to your husband.

“Qu’est-ce que c’est?” (What is this?)

“Ouvre-le.” (Open it.)

Jaehyun slowly opened the edges and once he took out the contents. Reading it thoroughly, he couldn’t believe it as his jaw dropped, pacing from the letter and you back and forth.

“Vraiment, ma chérie?” (Really, my darling?)

It was from a doctor you visited in Paris a few days before you left, who confirmed just exactly what caused your health to go feeble suddenly. You already had one certain suspicion, which you addressed in your leave of absence letter. Amelié, who finally got the position as the head, couldn’t believe her ears and insisted you take all the time off you needed.

“On dirait que Adrien a reçu son cadeau d'anniversaire en avance.” (It looks like Adrien received his birthday gift early.)

Overall, it turned out the headaches and repeated vomiting you mistook as motion sickness from traveling was a surprise hello to your second child.

A girl specifically, thanks to the blood test she recommended.

“Je t’aime, (Y/N).”

“Montre moi combien tu m’aimes, Jaehyun.” (Show me how much you love me, Jaehyun.)

The whole night through, the two of you vigorously celebrated with the moonlight from the windows and a few scented candles set in the room. Wet kisses left on your collarbone, words of devotion exchanged, holding his hand as he groaned from heartily thrusting in you, the number of moans from your lips overlapped with the vinyl playing in the room. The intimacy between you two increased, almost as if you made love for the first time again all those years ago.

Excluding being drenched from the rain.

Once the two of you grew tired, Jaehyun lied down beside you. Wrapping one arm around, one hand trailed down your naked skin again. His wedding band flashed your eyes, reminding you of the commitment you promised each other. For better, and for worse.

Jaehyun promised to love you endlessly as a woman and his wife, and it didn’t cease when you became the mother of his children. He respected how strong you are, physically and mentally. He helped you in any way he could as you endured the struggling process.

At the end of the day, his family was his biggest priority. More than ever now, you needed him as you go through the pregnancy phases again. Specifically, his index finger lingered on your stomach. There was no bump or other signs of showing, except for that glow he complimented you earlier on.

“We met and fell in love over the summer, got married in summer, had Adrien mid-summer, and now found out about our daughter at the start of summer.” He smiled, blessed at all the good he’s received during this time.

“The summer gods must adore us.” Your vacant hand with your wedding band topped his. To love and to cherish. “Ils m'ont amené à toi.” (They brought me to you.)

His power on you was simply addicting, as if your early twenties revisited you. You straddled himself once again, your fingers caressing his face sweetly. When it reached his lips, he placed longing kisses there and pulled you closer again for another kiss on your lips. In between, you mumbled in a silvery tone,

“Then they led us to say I do. Pour toujours et à jamais.”

copyright © 2021 by alluringjae.

[reidgraygubler]

sounds like sweet talk to my ears (spencer reid/fem!reader)

Title: Sounds Like Sweet Talk to My Ears

Request: kinda, it was already written but someone asked for it to be posted

Couple: Spencer Reid/Fem!Reader

Category: smut, fluff (18+ CONTENT!)

Content Warning:  age gap between two consenting adults (Reader is 22. So it’s 15 years), swearing, sexual content (fingering, bathtub sex (?), groping, penetrative sex/creampie, hand kink), falling in love with a sugar daddy, mildly ooc spencer, light drinking, Sugar daddy!Spencer, sugar daddy relationship, mentions of under-aged drinking (in the past)

Word Count: 4,507

Summary: Reader and Spencer go on vacation where their relationship develops.

A/N: few things, this authors note might be a little long. And im sorry for that. This was written for a full length fic with mgg as the person. But i have heavily edited it to be for spencer instead. So if there are any weird things, or spencer being way out of character, that is why. Like i said this was originally going to be a full length fic (this was previously written!!), but i have since stopped writing it, i think i have one other part that is right after this, so if this part goes good, i’ll probably post the next part. secondly, this was also written for a friend of mine, who is 22, that is why the age gap is so big between reader and spencer. It was also written an original character, but i tried my best to make it be reader insert friendly (lots of petnames and nicknames)...  someone on my nsfw blog (@reidsprincess​ ) asked about this, bc i found this gif that reminded me of this particular fic. Anyways… thanks for the love! Check out my masterlist! 

~*~* THIS DOES CONTAIN 18+ CONTENT!! *~*~

{***}{***}{***}

“This place is beautiful,” I gasped once we were both in the small beach bungalow room. It was more grandiose than the last place we stayed in. The whole place was cozy and comfortable. This was a place I was never expected to be in...

 The front door was connected to the living room, it was a comfortable room, two loveseats, and two armchairs. A flat-screen TV was mounted on the wall across from the furniture. And the kitchen was attached to the living room, separating the two with a breakfast bar and stools. The kitchen itself was better than the kitchen in my apartment. I was jealous of the owner of this home. Flowers and lit candles sat on every open surface.

The kitchen had a set of sliding glass doors, which opened up onto a patio. And that held outdoor furniture, and table and chairs set. Something told me it also housed a jacuzzi, and I was more than excited to utilize that later. The bedroom and bathroom were tuck elsewhere, but I had a feeling that it was as beautiful as the rest of the home.

The house sat on the beach. The sand was pure white and the water was perfectly blue. I couldn’t wait to run and play in the sand. As childish as that sounds… I’ve never been to the beach, so this is all new to me.

“Spencer,” I looked behind my shoulder and at him. He looked down at me with a smile as he set the luggage down on the ground beside him.

“How about,” Spencer pressed his lips to my ear and whispered. His fingers danced across my bare arm, leaving goosebumps in their wake. I shuddered and smiled softly. “I go run us a bath, while you order food? Dinner with dessert? Champagne?” he offered, dropping his hand to the hem of my shirt. I chuckled lightly and pushed his hand off me. 

“That’s your idea of a perfect evening?” I asked, turning around to face him. “Dinner and a bath?” I chuckled lightly. He was looking down at me; the smile on his lips told me everything I needed to know. That he needed me right now more than I needed him. Although, I don’t think it’s possible for him to need me more than I needed him.

“Any evening with you is a perfect evening,” he whispered, lifting his hand to rest on my cheek. His hand fell down the side of my cheek and rested under my jaw, his thumb rested on the apple of my chin. I grinned as the familiar feeling of butterflies grew in my tummy. 

“Oh you be quiet,” I whispered as I lifted my arms to wrap around his neck. He hummed before pressing a kiss to my lips. I hummed, pulling him down more so we were more so eye level. He wrapped his free arm around my waist and pulled me so I was close to his body. I breathed out a laugh through my nose. After a second, he pulled away from me and kept his eyes on me. “I guess you’re in luck then,” I smiled, placing my hands on his cheeks.

“How so?” he whispered, pressing his face into my hands. I smiled and went onto my toes.

“Because our perfect evenings sound very similar,” I whispered and pecked his lips, “Every evening with you is perfect,” I smiled before walking away from him.

“What… What are you doing, Sunshine?” Spencer asked in a complaining tone as I walked towards the kitchen. I looked over my shoulder at him as I pulled my phone out of my pocket.

“Dinner?” I waved my phone in the air, “What do you want?” I looked back at my phone and smiled.

“Whatever you want will be fine,” he came back up to me and kissed me again before going towards the bathroom, “Bubbles?” he called before stepping into the bathroom. I laughed as I pressed my phone to my ear.

“You know me so well, Spence!” I smiled and sat on one of the stools at the breakfast bar. I looked around the kitchen and living room, taking in the beautiful decor. I wonder how he knew about this place...

I quickly ordered food before finding my way to the bathroom. And, the bathroom was just as impressive as the rest of the house. One wall was just a window that faced the beach. And a large white bathtub sat in front of the window. A shower was tucked in the wall, just so it was out of the way, but even that was beautiful. And of course, it had a toilet and sink. 

“Do you… Live here?” I asked, watching as Spencer was filling the tub. “Or like… Do you own this house? I mean… This is just. This is a beautiful house,” I leaned against the counter and looked at him. He stood up from the tub and looked at me. 

“Sometimes…” he paused as he looked around the bathroom. Sometimes? How do you sometimes live somewhere? “On the very rare occasion, when I have time off… I take my mother down here for a week. She loves the beach and the ocean and the sand in her toes,” he smiled as he rolled the sleeves of his shirt down. Okay, I guess that makes sense. “You order dinner?” he asked, resting his hands on the counter beside me. I looked up at him and nodded.

“Yeah, yeah, dinner’s ordered and on its way here,” I nodded and rested a hand on his chest. He quirked an eyebrow and smiled softly.

“What’d you order?” he rested his hands on my waist. I smiled and cocked my head to the side, allowing his hands to wander up my sides.  

“I’m sorry, it’s a surprise. I don’t want to tell you,” I smiled at him. Spencer wrinkled his nose before kissing my forehead. I let out a breath of air and shrugged. “You’ll find out in 20 minutes. You should save some space in the bath for hot water,” I poked his nose before sneaking away from his arms. He grasped my wrists and pulled me back so I was in front of him.

“Where are you going?” he asked, looking down at me. I flashed my brightest smile and shrugged.

“Champagne,” I batted my eyelashes. Spencer laughed and nodded. “You still want a glass or do you want to get in the bath now?” I offered as I walked back towards the kitchen. 

“As always,” Spencer followed behind me. “I’ll grab a bottle, you get the glasses?” he asked, going towards a mini wine cooler. I nodded and opened a cabinet. I opened a few before finally pulling out two glasses.

“If this is your mother’s place, why aren’t there any photos of your family?” I asked, leaning on the counter as I sipped my beverage. Spencer turned and looked at me, leaning across from me on the counter.

“We rent it out on season.” He replied, looking down at his glass. I nodded.

“What does that mean?” I asked, feeling mildly stupid. He looked at me with a smile. “Sorry. But you gotta remember that I’m an elementary school teacher’s assistant… Who's poor. I have an apartment that I can barely afford… Not two houses, one of which I rent out.” I pointed out. Spencer laughed and nodded. “Or did you think I was just sleeping with you for fun,” I leaned over the counter to kiss his lips. 

“Hurt,” he placed his hand on his chest in a mockery of hurt. I smiled at him and cocked my head. He looked back at me with a small smile on his lips. “Basically, when we’re not here, we rent it out… But we don’t have too many people staying here,” he chuckled before sipping his drink. “As for sleeping with me just for fun? I didn’t know it was just for fun,” he pouted. I smiled and shrugged. 

“Can’t forget about that paycheck too,” I smiled at him and winked. Spencer looked at me with raised eyebrows, causing me to laugh. “And, I think the fun is just an added bonus feature…” I laughed, throwing my head back. “I thought what we were was just money and sex? Nothing more,” I whispered, leaning on the counter. Spencer looked at me and shrugged.

“It could be more than that,” he smiled. I lowered my glass to the countertop and stared at him.  I could feel my lips trying to pull into a smile, but the longer I stared at him, the more I wished this wasn’t a dream. Because that’s all it felt like when I was with him. A dream.

“Surely… You can’t be serious, Spencer,” I whispered, finally looking away from him. Spencer lifted his hand and rested it on my cheek, carefully turning my head back to look at him.

“I’ve never been serious like this before, Sunshine. And, please, don’t call me Shirley,” he whispered, poking my nose. I smiled and leaned over the counter again, kissing his lips. 

“Only if you’re serious, Spencer. I understand you’re a busy man yourself, with all that saving people with the FBI,” I whispered. He nodded, keeping his hand on my face. I wasn’t exactly sure if he was being serious, mostly because he’s a bit older than me and most people my age (and his age) don’t take such a big age gap.

A knock on the door caused us both to look that direction. I looked back at him and smiled. “Oh no. What’d you order?” He asked, watching me bounce towards the front door. I pulled the door open and met the delivery man with a smile.

“Thank you very much,” I smiled and took the food and pressed the door shut. “I got pizza because I really wanted pepperoni pizza,” I looked at him as I held the box up. Spencer laughed and nodded as he grabbed the two champagne glasses and bottle.

“I’m okay with having pizza,” he smiled before taking the lead back to the bathroom. I held the box in a tight grip as I followed behind him. “Although, I never pictured pizza to be a fancy dinner before a bath,” he looked over at me with a quirked eyebrow. I laughed before I sat on the ground.

“I mean, you are the one who put me in charge of ordering dinner,” I looked at him, watching as he sat on the ground across from me. He sat against the cabinets of the sink counter. I shoved his food towards him and smiled. “It just shows we have two different tastes. I mean, remember the first night we met. You ordered room service for steak and chicken alfredo,” I pointed out as I pulled my food out of the bag. “I’m a simple woman. I like pepperoni pizza,” I smiled at him.

“I think I’ll put you in charge of ordering food more often,” Spencer smiled at me as he went for a slice of pizza. 

“I think that’s a good idea,” I grinned. “I’ll be sure to eat quick. I’ve never been so ready for a bath in my entire life,” I spoke as I moved to sit closer to him. 

“Take your time. We have all the time in the world, Princess,” he smiled as he sipped his champagne. I felt my face warm up a bit as I looked away from him. Something about the petname he has for me just gets me going, and I love it. He definitely knew that too, that I loved the petname of Princess. 

“Glad to know that,” I giggled as I looked at my mostly-empty glass. 

{***}{***}{***}

“More champagne, Princess?” Spencer’s voice was low as he held up the bottle that was now mostly empty. I lolled my head back onto his shoulder and rested my elbows on his knees (I was sitting between his legs in the bath) and held up my glass. 

“I would love more,” I whispered, watching him pour too much into my glass. I hummed happily, telling him it was enough. He placed the bottle back on the stool and wrapped both arms back around my body. The bathwater was warm and matched with how much booze I was drinking, I knew I was beyond intoxicated. I’m sure Spencer’s presence only fueled that feeling. No, it 100% added to that feeling. I knew that. And, he knew that. He knew he had a way with me that no other man would have, or ever have even.

“You should pace yourself, Princess,” Spencer whispered, pressing his lips to my shoulder. I giggled before sipping my drink, telling him I shouldn’t. His breath of air fanned over my skin as he began pressing kisses to my neck. 

“You, Spencer, should stop giving me alcohol,” I looked up at him as best I could. He smiled and kissed me again. “Besides... you’ve had just as much... as me,” I spoke through tiny hiccups. Spencer chuckled and rubbed my shoulders before pressing his lips back to them. My eyes rolled into the back of my head as the unknown tension slipped away. Damn his touch.

“Okay, that’s fair,” he murmured into my skin. "However, I've been drinking for sixteen years. You, Sunshine, are only 22 and have only been drinking a year,” he stated like I would follow the rules. I held back the cackle that so desperately wanted to escape my lips. Me? Follow the rules?? Never ever… This should be a fun thing to tell him.

"True… But I have been drinking since I was 18," I smiled and nodded. I sipped my champagne as I rested my head back on his chest. Spencer made a sound of disapproval which only made me laugh. Oh yeah, that’s right… Under aged drinking is illegal… and he is an FBI agent...  “Okay, since when have you known me to follow the rules? I’m dating a man 15 years older than me,” I pointed out. 

"Oh, you naughty girl." Spencer playfully scolded me. I pouted before humming again.

“Yes, but I’m your naughty girl,” I laughed, arching my back a little bit. I felt his hand travel from my stomach and to my thighs. I hummed as I got a little more comfortable for what he was about to do. “Starting early,” I teased. Spencer let out a breathy laugh. He gently pressed his lips to my throat, right on my pulse point. I gasped lightly as he parted his lips and sucked a spot on my neck. I held my glass just outside of the tub. 

“I’d rather have champagne in the bath than champagne and glass on the floor,” he kept his voice low as he pulled my hand back over the bath. I laughed and shook my head. “Is this okay,” he asked as his other hand traveled a bit more upwards, towards me.

“It’s always okay,” I whispered, taking a deep breath of air. I could feel my heart beating in my chest, I wouldn’t be surprised if Spencer could feel and hear it. 

“Let me take this,” he spoke, taking my glass from my hands. I let out a sound of protest as he took my glass and pressed my head into his chest. He chuckled as he placed the glass on the stool beside the empty bottle. “You can have it back,” he spoke in a mocking tone. I pouted and dropped my head to my shoulder. “In a minute,” he added, his tone becoming a little bit more smug. I rolled my eyes and let out a huff of air.

“Fine,” I whispered. Spencer chuckled again and placed his hand back on my thigh. I hummed happily and looked up at him. “Do you have to be such a tease all the time?” I pouted at him. He smiled and shrugged before dragging his hand closer to my center. 

“Could be more than a tease,” he replied in a whisper. I rolled my eyes and let out a deep breath of air. I carefully lifted my foot out of the water and rested it on the ledge of the tub. “Oh no, you’re gonna get water all over the floor,” he scolded.

“Oh no,” It was my turn to mock him. I smiled as I waved my foot in the air. Spencer hummed before pressing his lips to the side of my head. “A little bit of wet never killed anyone,” I snickered. Except, that snicker became a gasp when he pushed a finger past my folds. My eyes fluttered shut as my jaw stayed slack open. I pressed my back into his chest, feeling his arousal on my lower back. I nearly slipped under the water if Spencer hadn’t had his other arm around my waist, holding me safely against his body.

“Calm down there, Princess,” Spencer laughed as he held me up. I glared over my shoulder at him. “Don’t need you slipping under the water. I think you’re wet enough,” he added as his finger slowly circled my clit. My hands gripped the side of the tub and then moved to rest on his knees. 

“I fucking hate you,” I muttered but moaned towards the end of my statement. Spencer laughed as he pressed his lips to the side of my head. His other arm was pressed against my chest, keeping me still as I wiggled and writhed under his touch. A breathy moan fell from my lips as he picked up his pace.  

“No, I don’t think you do,” he whispered, keeping his lips close to my ear. My eyes fluttered shut as I dropped my head to the side. Spencer took this as his chance to press kisses across the space behind my ear, causing me to gasp lightly. Spencer hummed, pleased with how I was reacting to any sort of his touches. 

I lifted both my hands and gripped his arm as he slowly eased a finger into my center. I pressed my nails so hard into his arm, I wouldn’t be surprised if come morning he’d have crescent-shaped bruises there.

A man like Spencer who has hands as beautiful as his, he clearly knows what he’s doing. It’d be a sin if he didn’t. A loss for all of womankind. I guess that’s why I’m so pleased that it’s me under his hands right now and not a different girl. I quite literally love his hands, and the way he can just work his magic with his fingers, getting me going in a matter of minutes. He wasn’t lying when he said he was a magician. 

“You alright, Princess,” he asked, keeping his tone low as he continued thrusting his fingers in and out of me, curling them just right. I hope the gasp I gave was a good response because I don’t think I knew words right now. My brain was getting fuzzy, and my belly was starting to grow tense. Like a coil deep within me was about to break. 

“S’close,” I mustered out. I swallowed roughly as he began rubbing my clit with the heel of his palm. My whimpers, gasps, and moans weren’t evenly timid as he picked up the pace, finally pushing me over the edge. 

I was a mess. There’s no other way of putting it. But, I’m always a mess when I’m with him. 

Spencer slowly withdrew his hand from between my legs and placed it over top of his other arm, embracing me like his life depended on it. I took a deep breath, trying to steady my breathing. A giggle fell from my lips as I threw my head back against his chest. Spencer hummed as he looked down at me.

“I love your fucking hands,” I turned my head and looked at him. Spencer smiled at me and laughed before pulling his hands off me to look at them. I took one of them in my own and looked at it, entranced by his veins and freckles peppered over the backside. It felt right for his hand to be in mine.

“Thank you… I guess. I think that’s a compliment,” he mused as he placed his arms back over my chest and kissed my cheek. “You good?” he asked, his thumbs rubbing my shoulders.

“Yeah, I’m gonna go dry off and get water. Better see you in the bedroom.” I smiled at him. He pressed another kiss to my face before allowing me to get out. 

“As you wish, Princess,” he smiled at me as I grabbed a towel. His eyes lingered on me for a moment as I wrapped the towel around my body. “I’ll be right behind you,” he added as I grabbed our glasses and empty champagne bottle. 

I smiled at him as I left the bathroom, making my way across towards the kitchen. True to my word, I got a glass of water and drank half of it in one sip. I grabbed a second glass and retreated back towards the bedroom. 

Spencer wasn’t finished in the bathroom, I could still hear him splashing around in the water. I grinned and shook my head as I stepped into the bedroom. I placed the two glasses on the nightstand. I sat on the edge of the bed, waiting for him to finish. 

Not even two minutes later, Spencer entered the room, towel around his waist. I stared at him, my eyes lingering on his shoulders, down his arms to his hands, before flicking to gaze upon his belly and torso. I felt my lips twitch as I stood, leaving my towel behind. He smiled as I basically sprinted up to him.

I placed an open mouth kiss over his lips, putting my arms around his neck to pull him down to my height. I could feel his grin against my lips as our noses smooshed together. His arms wrapped around my waist as he brought us to the bed. 

“You’re so eager, Princess,” he muttered against my lips. I hummed as I threaded my fingers through his hair. That action elicited a moan from his lips, making me smile. He gently pushed me against the bed, standing at the foot as I got myself to lie at the pillows. The way he looked at me told me he was pleased with how the night was going to end. And honestly, I understood. 

He dropped his towel from his hips, letting it fall to the floor, before kneeling on the bed. I took a deep breath as I stared at him, keeping my eyes on my face. I knew if they wandered any further, I’d become a puddle right there. Well, more of a puddle than I already was.

Spencer smiled at me as his fingers ghosted my legs. He gently placed a kiss on different parts of my body as he made his way up to my face. The bliss I felt was unexplainable as he grasped one of my hands and kissed my lips. 

He looked down at me, a small smile on his lips. My chest heaved as my breathing picked up once again. The kisses he pressed to the swells of my breasts made me feel like I was floating. That, or it was the softness of the mattress and bedding beneath us. 

“You ready for me, Princess?” he asked, pressing a knee between my legs, separating them so he could fit comfortably between them. I licked my lips and nodded, keeping my eyes on his. His nose twitched as a smile grew on his lips. He brought a hand to rest on my cheek. “I need to hear you say it,” he leaned close to my ear and whispered. 

“Yeah, yes… I’m always ready,” I swallowed roughly and nodded. Spencer pulled his hand from my face and moved it to my hip. I lifted my legs and wrapped them around his waist, pulling him close to me. He smiled and kissed my lips, a simple distraction as he pressed his cock into me. The breath in my lungs was knocked from me, causing me to loud gasp. Spencer smiled against my lips. 

“You feel so good, Princess,” he groaned, dropping his head to my shoulder. It took a minute for either of us to move, adjusting to the feeling of each other. “Ready,” he asked, moving to place his forehead on mine. I swallowed and nodded, bringing my hands to rest on his cheeks. 

A smile twitched on his lips as he slowly started to move his hips. At first, it was an unsure rhythm but slowly grew in a slow and meaningful pace. His hands roamed my body before wrapping around my torso and holding me close. 

“Faster,” I panted, pulling my hands from his face and knotting them in his hair, again. He nodded, picking his pace. A familiar feeling in my belly, the coil winding, returned. The groans that fell from Spencer’s lips pushed me closer. 

“You’re doing so good, Princess,” his voice was low and rough as he spoke. 

I pulled a hand away from his head and brought it between our bodies. I began rubbing my clit, pushing me closer to the edge. Spencer’s thrusting grew more erratic.

“Come with me, please,” I whimpered, keeping my arm around him. He nodded and groaned as I clenched around him.  After a moment, we both became a mess. Moans and gasps of each other’s names filled the silent bedroom. 

Spencer stayed put above me for a minute, his arms around my body and holding me close. We took our time coming down from our shared high. A whimper escaped my lips as he pulled out from me and collapsed on the bed beside me.

“I got you water,” I panted, vaguely gesturing towards the two glasses of water on the nightstand. Spencer chuckled as he reached for a glass. I watched as he drank the water, his adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed. I smiled at him, keeping my eyes on him. I knew I should look away, but I couldn’t. “You’re right, I don’t hate you,” I swallowed roughly and shook my head.

“I know I’m right,” he looked down at me with a smile. I rolled my eyes and watched him get off the bed. I furrowed my eyebrows and sat up. “I’m always right, Princess,” he looked over his shoulder and at me. I smiled and nodded as I got off the bed. 

“So much for taking a bath,” I rolled my eyes as I felt our mixture roll down my legs. “I’m gonna shower,” I smiled at him as I walked towards him. He pecked my lips and nodded. 

“Don’t have too much fun without me,” he poked my sides as I grabbed for my towel. I squealed and shook my head. 

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” I smiled at him.

taglist: @itsmyblogandillreblogifiwantto​, @thebluetint​

[organic-guacamole]

episode 209 spoilers below

I'm so late today but here it is

I love EJ, he's finally learning to be happy. I'm so proud.

Ms Jenn = every boomer during zoom calls, like jeez yes we can hear you stop shouting at me.

LOVE THE SUBTLE JOKE ABOUT QUARANTINE "these dark times" "you mean spring break?"

ah yes, remember when we thought covid was just gonna give us a longer spring break? good times

SEBLOS

damn the passive aggressiveness from Carlos and the absolutely over it tone from seb✋

CASWELL COUSINS!!!!! THEY'RE THE BEST!!!!

we needed more if this kind of goofiness for the first part of season 2 that only such an iconic duo can provide.

old old movies-

is it even that old, or is Nini being a gen alpha rn-

i choose to imagine EJ being scared of the movie and hiding in Ashlyn's shoulder while she keeps a straight face and then EJ pretending to be tough afterwards

aww redlyn are soulmates.... yknow, if gingers had souls

(please ignore me)

y'all saw how EJ's face *lit up* when Gina logged on? how dare you tell me he doesn't like her

ofc she's no damsel in distress, she's Gina porter, she's amazing.

so do we think she'd be the type to just glare at suspicious people? or bark at them

do they not know that Rini broke up? or is Ms Jenn just wanting Nini to suffer through her heartbreak to make her a better actress....

speaking of, why is Nini in the call? she's not in the show anymore. Unless she is, even after the rose and the song got cut, which would be so unfair to all those that auditioned properly before she even came back but whatever, she's the main character I get it 🙄

big red is a hero honestly, Nini better thank him for changing the subject like that

I can't-

i won't work you over the break-

this woman would 100% work her kids 24/7 if it was legal and idk how to feel about it.

YES GINA USE THAT CHARM

QUEEN

FRENCH QUEEN

SHE LEARNT FROM THE BEST (antoine obvi)

smh the airport lady, eavesdropping on Gina's call.

The way she was so happy to answer EJ's call, "eej"

I love them your honour.

EJ WITH PAINTED NAILS YES PLEASE

great now we need to see Gina, Ashlyn and EJ having a complete spa day and EJ getting really into it and Gina and Ashlyn take pictures of him when he's laying down in a robe with a mask and cucumbers on his eyes.

finally we get to see Gina's side of portwell

the way she considered it as flirting, this is the sign she asked for in episode 6 come onnnnn

no is Asher/jack really doing tiktok dances in an airport-

Ricky is me. I am burrito.

oh Lynne, sweetie, I'm sorry but the blonde hair is not it

is that even the same lady or-

THE BEAN

THE CHICAGO BEAN

THE BIG OLD METAL BEAN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CITY 😭

jetlag is my go to excuse for anything... I haven't travelled in 2 years.

"welcome to the Lynne and Mike gossip show. where we talk about our depressed son that we both neglect in certain ways! And now a word from our sponsor, Nord VPN..."

SO MANY CANDLES

WHAT DEMON IS LYNNE TRYING TO SUMMON IN HIS ROOM-

is Nina becoming social media obsessed EJ from season 1? AND SHE LIED ABOUT HAVING SONGS TOO PLEASE WHY ARW THEY RECYCLING THE SAME PLOT-

Gina smiling at the picture of her family on Instagram makes me so happy, idek why.

EJ's nails are so pretty, we needed to see it more (unless he had it on for the rest of the episode and I just.... didn't notice🧍🏽‍♀️)

oh not the tiktok kid✋

yes ma'am end this strange mans whole tiktok career

sir take a hint and leave

GINA NO DONT SAY YOUR LAST NAME HE COULD BE A HUMAN TRAFFICKER

Ricky, walking in style✨

weird kid, ok then Lynne, can't you see he's this close to the edge?

not all your fault baby Ricky, Nini sucks a bit more

RICKY YOU DIDN'T COME DOWN HARD ON THE SONG-

YOU ASKED WHAT IT WAS ABOUT AND SHE SHUT YOU DOWN-

PLEASE DO NOT BLAME YOURSELF

ok but the deleting comment thing was very bad

still don't know if I like Jack honestly

hmmm so Nini's calling herself Nini instead of Nina in her little egg seat, while trying to write a song without inspiration.... Nini, honey, Ricky was your muse, he inspired you to write all those songs, even if it wasn't good for the relationship.

that doesn't mean you gotta get back with him, or that you can't write a song that not about him butttt it'll take some time

the rainbow sticker in her box and her rainbow shirt-

anyways wbk she's not totally straight

Jack are you a criminal?

quick, Gina, check his ankle for a tracker

THE YES AND PRACTICE STRIKES AGAIN

the way Gina wasn't into it in episode 6 but she's used the technique twice now

stole her grandma's Pomeranian-

Jack where the hell did you pull that out from-

the fake crying killed me, that looks like so much fun though

anyone wanna raid a first class lounge with me?

wait so is jack not gonna go in with her?

wouldn't he go in too? help look for the credit card? SO CONFUSED

the first class lounge guy was so into the drama though, watch his face when they start arguing 😭

sorry to break this to you Kourtney, but you haven't even blocked the second act yet soooo...

take that as you will

I love how all of them are totally dissing the dance off

that's the most realistic part of this show tbh

shouldn't Nini have asked how she knew....since the start? why is the fact that her best friend has knowledge of a North high secret now dawning on her...

Howie is sweet honestly, at least he's trying to help. but I stand with Kourtney, don't take him back just because he sang an amazing song, and is giving you a heads up on what's gonna happen...

KOURTNEY IS ME TRYING TO LEAVE AN ONLINE CLASS

I hate school

ooo Nini's writing a song about bad internet connection 🤩🤩🤩

I never lie, except when I do-

son that is the creepiest thing you could say to a stranger that you've been "helping"

2 truths and a lie👀

he's an Ariana fan 100%

called it.

OLDER BROTHER-

WHAT-

free spirit? damn so brother porter was in that horse movie

so has she been kissed or not?????????

I feel like she's moved more than 15 times though so possibly

but then if she's moved so much, and before east high she never opened up to anyone, she's never been kissed then?? damn

same though Gina so let's be besties please

heartbreak president is a great song title idea, give Nini a call rn

but wait

is the no strings attached feeling thing about her telling Ricky she liked him? she thought she was moving away so she thought it'd be no strings attached???

guys I think I figured it out insert the "I've connected two dots" meme

THE DUKE SWEATSHIRT

IS THAT YOUR BOYFRIEND'S

OMG I LOVE I LOVE

NOT THAT I KNOW OF???

ma'am did you just kill me

yes you did

Lynne and Ricky have such a weird relationship

YES IT DID SUCK

TODD SUCKS

LYNNE SUCKS

yeah I get that you wanted Ricky to like Todd BUT THAT WASN'T THE TIME

right so we already know that Ricky was so desperate to keep Nini cuz he didn't want to be like his parents, and now Lynne's talking about this-

Richard needs a long hug

yes Lynne, it is your fault. thank you for finally admitting it.

YES DYE YOUR HAIR

BLOND HIGHLIGHTS RICKY WILL RISE AGAIN

"sometimes the best, last thing you can do for someone you love, is let them go."

gotta admit I teared up at that point

not me thinking big red was calling ms Jenn cupcake for a hot second-

Carlos please omg, you're at the "beach" and they're leaving for the pool?

also, why not just do the call from the hotel room please omg

"don't ask me"

"Carlos"

OMG WHAT HAPPENED

big red wants the tea

O M G

SEB IS JEALOUS

JEALOUS SEBBY IS MY FAVOURITE THING IDC

I'm surprised ms Jenn knew how to give Nini permission to screenshare tbh

So lily's been stalking the East high kids and spending time editing this video while she's supposedly in an immersion trip.... right

EJ and Ashlyn's picture is so chaotic, what even is happening there

"slacking off" bestie its spring break, obviously they're confident enough that they'll get it done in time so why not focus on your own musical.

jealous seb = sassy seb

please what if those guys Carlos is posing with are his cousins or something and that's why he's so confused about Seb

6 YEAR OLD EJ I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM

Nini saying she's obsessed with her ex, that's not weird at all 👍

I can just tell Matt had a blast harassing Julia with those puppets.

Jack please dont be like that, "yet"

chances are you'll never see eachother again 🥰

(honestly sometimes I really miss those friends I made on trips and stuff when we'd spend the day or week together, only to never see them again....those were the good days though)

Ashlyn and Nini should write more songs..... something better than this one at least

Nini: "im good"

cue the Tia Mowry (please I can't spell) crying gif

oh I forgot Ricky was in the show for a hot second

1. where did Gina get to film this without people being around

2. did she just... randomly change her clothes???

ok but the transition between Carlos and EJ

*chefs kiss*

now everyone shut up, EJ's singing

oh i think I'm pregnant

HIS MUSCLES

YES KOURTNEY

I love how big red and Kourtney went from being "the best friends™" to the couple in season 1, to kinda close themselves and having their own plots

sebby makes me so happy

props to biggies editing skills honestly

PORTWELL BEING SIDE TO SIDE I CANT

AND SEBLOS OMG

big red lives for the drama

"wow" so true Ricky

no he is not cute, stop it

"holding" ok that's kinda cute

yeah EJ's a lucky guy😌

jokes aside, it's not that hard to exchange numbers-

keep in touch if you want

ok I really like Jack now

if he comes back in season 3, maybe have him be LGBTQ+ ?

like the only out characters they have rn are Seb and Carlos and they're like the sterotypes, yk?

I'd love to see jack kinda break the mold

Ricky's breaking my heart

that song just hurts

the only thing

now I don't hate Lynne????????

HOW DARE THEY WRITE IN A PROPER REDEMPTION ARC FOR HER

UGH IM SUPPOSED TO HATE HER FOREVER

I mean I don't live her now but she's good

but honestly

"mom can I show you something"

IT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL

THE PICTURE AND EVERYTHING OMG

I'm sobbing please help

Gina saying she's just waiting for the right guy and then EJ coming to the airport to pick her up late at night without her asking, offering to bring her back in the morning so she won't have to Uber, bringing her a granola bar (WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT SHE FORGOT TO PACK) and without expecting anything in return???

ms ma'am you've got a keeper right there

her smile at the end was so heartwarming I really can't.

this episode was great.

it felt really short but I liked it, great character development for Ricky, Lynne and Gina.

Cant wait for next episode to see more of EJ being the ideal boyfriend /hj

[atalana]

[copied over from my cr blog, also this is gonna get long, i’d apologise but im not sorry]

okay, so

this is a rant probably about 7 years in the making, bc when i first watched lok i had not done any music study, i had not done any composing of my own, my knowledge of music theory was at a primary school level and i still thought tv soundtracks were just made by one person composing a whole cache of music and then the audio editors pick and choose what track to place where

(spoiler alert that’s not how film and tv scoring works, i have now done a music composition course where we had to score a short film, among other things, and i have so much more respect for tv composers jesus christ)

but this one stuck out to me even way back then, bc me barely knowing what a leitmotif was was like “hey this one little refrain keeps popping up whenever bolin does lavabending, and i like it, i’m gonna see if it’s on the soundtrack”

it was not, and that’s sort of where i left it back in 2014, but i actually did a rewatch of lok pretty recently out of nostalgia, and then noticed it even more

and to explain why (and this is also a little bit why five’s stuck out to me in tua, i’ll get to that in another ask), let’s cover, leitmotifs, and tv scoring in general

so a leitmotif is basically just a short musical idea that represents something in a piece of music. when i studied motivic development we were encouraged to make that motif four notes or less, and then develop it into something longer (aka a theme), because if you can constantly come back to a really short idea while keeping the piece moving, that’s what makes a piece of music memorable

(you can ignore those rules on purpose but that’s a different essay)

so the most common way that a leitmotif shows up in soundtracks is to represent a character or a location - you play the motif when that character shows up or when you’re in that location and boom, the audience associates that motif with that person place or thing, and you can then use this to tell the audience things without actually telling them. for example, star wars playing the imperial march whenever someone does something darth vader related - darth vader isn’t on screen, but you can feel his presence, because his music is playing

and if we were a film score, where we have two hours to show one particular character’s development, great! we give them a simple motif, and then as they grow as a person we change their motif to reflect what is happening to them, until we end up with something that communicates on a subconscious level how much they’ve grown. we toss in as much symbolism as we can, and we have a really great soundtrack that’s instantly memorable

tv scoring, is harder. partially because of time constraints (have you ever composed half an hour of original music a week, and had to make sure it fits perfectly with every beat of what’s happening on screen? these guys have), partially because there’s a much larger focus on ensemble casts

so what atla and lok do, for the most part, is not score individual character motifs for everyone. this is fairly common in tv soundtracks, instead we score ideas, concepts, and feelings - these’ll come up a lot more and give you more information than just “oh hey this character’s on screen”

the avatar state, for example, has the strongest and most recognisable theme across both shows. i’m linking an atla track in here because it has the best example but you’ll know this shows up with korra too - and with particularly important moments for wan, for kyoshi, etc. they also appear in the opening of both shows, four strong notes that start and end on the same note (in the case of what i’m linking, it’s an F#)

the first part of this track is the more uncertain, pensive theme that comes up when both avatars are feeling doubt/worry/sadness, but then it transitions into the more recognisable four. worth noting though, those are both basically the same motif. if i write them out back to back, you’ll notice they both have four notes and start and end on F#. if i had to guess, four notes four elements, and it comes back to the start because the avatar is a cycle.

korra has a theme for when she’s fighting, but not an individual character theme. the airbenders as a concept have a theme, republic city has thematic instruments, as do some big name characters, like iroh and his tsungi horn (this is also a cross-series thing, he’s always playing it in atla, it shows up when zuko has to make big moral decisions, and when we first meet iroh in the spirit world in lok, it shows up there too, to let the audience know who this is before we properly see him)

so, if korra doesn’t get a single theme and instead has several for different aspects of her life, and mako and asami follow along with the mood of the story like all the other characters, the fact that bolin has a personal leitmotif at all, let alone a solid, developing one, is pretty remarkable!

now, granted, it mostly starts with book 3, before then he was like every other character, but it has clear symbolism through those last two books! and, initially i thought it was related only to his lavabending, since that’s most of when it shows up, but since my rewatch, i’ve started calling it his hero theme

see, when people wanna criticise mako and bolin, usually the comments they get are that bolin’s too immature and mako’s too serious/uptight. but like, that’s how they work, you can’t analyse either of them without the context of the other. since they were little kids on the streets, bolin chases his heart and mako makes sure they don’t die from it, that is their entire childhood. and neither would have got here on their own because mako wouldn’t take the necessary risks and bolin wouldn’t take the necessary precautions. (like. remove either one from the equation and they’d still be working for the triple threats bc s1 and their flashback miniseries make pretty clear that bolin got them out and mako kept them out)

and then book 2 proves it! because it splits team avatar up, and what happens? bolin is totally taken advantage of by varrick and used as a pawn in his evil plan and mako ends up in jail

so what’s book 3, to them? it’s, being able to find themselves without having that codependency. mako no longer has someone to protect, which is what he’s based his whole life around so far - bolin’s doing fine and he’s no longer dating either korra or asami. and bolin’s trying his hand at some of that responsibility (look at how he immediately adopts kai who is explicitly them but younger because he wants to be the older brother for once). most importantly, they find the rest of their family, and stop being defined by being orphans. they don’t have to be that singular piece of a puzzle, they can just be themselves. and that’s where bolin’s character really starts to shine, because that’s when they bring in the bending plot, and bending, perhaps more than any other character, really gets to the heart of who bolin is

if you want more of my thoughts on that i have an essay here, but tl;dr: bolin’s an extremely powerful earthbender, but he’s not a metalbender because metalbending requires you to double down on the earth characteristics and think like an earthbender, and bolin doesn’t, he’s too fluid for that, which is one of his major strengths, so of course he can lavabend

and finally - to his motif itself! (as a note, i’ve put all of these in the same key to show where it repeats, but there’s a variety of keys used in the show)

as far as i can find, it first shows up in s3e8, when bolin stuns p’li with this well placed shot

[Edit: it first showed up in the s2 finale, but again in a simplified version and again with him doing something heroic with earthbending, so we can still start the analysis here]

mako volunteers bolin for that job, because he knew bolin was capable of it. why? because bolin landed an identical shot earlier in the episode, after trying to metalbend, getting frustrated he can’t, and cheating with some extremely well aimed earthbending. it’s just a short refrain and you barely notice it, but it’s the first connection of this motif with the theme of bolin’s bending

it looks like this, and it’s always played on a trumpet, which is part of why i call it the hero theme, because, if you’re looking at music from a western perspective, trumpets were used to herald kings, and then used to represent military glory, and then when superhero themes started happening, they used trumpets too - it’s basically western music shorthand for hero these days

(it’s also symmetrical so that helps with the good vibes)

and he’s saving everyone here, so it’s linked to his bending, but it’s also linked to his heroism

it ties the two together, and they are tied together.

when’s the next time it shows up? episode 10, when the brothers are in prison in ba sing se, and bolin tries to metalbend them out. again, he’s doing this to save people, and this motif gets a few notes added on to the end in a raising pattern - they’re inspiring, but they don’t go anywhere. which is exactly what happens in the scene, because he’s trying to go about this in the wrong way. mako believes in him, but it won’t (and doesn’t) work

it appears in episode 12 when bolin saves everyone from ghazan destroying the temple, in a more fancy orchestral remake of the first version - it’s impressive, but it hasn’t actually developed yet, it’s just his discovery of it

the book 3 finale already has its own fucking amazing soundtrack, i love that entire episode’s score, but it gets its own moment there too, and the first real development!

because what we hear is not what we’ve heard before. we know it’s the same theme, because it’s using those signature trumpets, but it’s the second part of this phrase, the answer to the question supplied by the first one. why? because bolin’s figured out who he is and he’s starting to use it. it still hasn’t settled yet though, it’s early days and he’s still just turning ghazan’s lava back on him, so again, it raises, leaving it on a question mark

it doesn’t appear in s4e7 when he lavabends as a warning against the escaped prisoners, because he’s using it as a threat, not to help people. but it does later in the episode when he uses lavabending to save them from kuvira. and that’s when we get the first full phrase, question and answer

it keeps the first motif identical, takes out the first note of the second, and ties them together - except now it’s not open ended, now it knows where it’s going - it’s been three years, at this point bolin is confident in both himself and his bending

and then that phrase appears all over the place in the finale, because all bolin does is save people - everyone from the exploding building, he slows the giant mecha with lavabending, he saves opal, he slows the giant mecha again by collapsing a building on it, and most importantly, he’s the one rescuing his brother this time, instead of the other way around (though that one doesn’t get a motif appearance bc admittedly a fuck ton of other things are happening in the soundtrack at the time)

so to that question asked in book three - who is bolin when not next to someone else? well, funnily enough, we saw it in book two as well, just in a warped way, playing nuktuk. it just wasn’t truly him because it was created by varrick, and he needed to get away from varrick too. the question put forward by the narrative is who is bolin, and the answer given by the music is, he is a hero. and i don’t know why bolin is the only one to get a theme like this, but i think it may have something to do with the fact that, while everyone in team avatar has been a hero and saved people, he is the only one who has, from the start, solely been motivated by wanting to help people. he follows his heart, and his heart cares, about everyone. it’s been the driving force behind almost everything he’s ever done. and i love him so much

[gamerwoo]

[The Pack Next Door] Wooyoung: Sorry Not Sorry (Part One)

(photo edit courtesy of @songmingki​)

Characters: Wooyoung x female reader

Genre/warnings: werewolf au, brother’s best friend au, not really fluffy but there’s no angst until the very end

Word count: 1,788

Summary: Everyone knows that werewolves can’t control who they imprint on, no matter what they think their preferences might be. But despite that, Jongho can’t help but absolutely loathe Wooyoung because the older boy went and imprinted on his older sister.

a/n: reader is obviously written to be older than jongho so if you dont like that bc it doesn’t apply to you, im sorry but oh well. also i don’t have any sort of update schedule so updates are gonna be way slower than they were for mingi’s lmao

Next | Sorry Not Sorry Masterlist

For a long time, Wooyoung was just your younger brother’s annoying friend. You were three years older than Jongho, so while you weren’t too far apart in age, you were just far enough that while growing up, you found your younger brother and his best friend absolutely annoying and obnoxious. And it seemed to be one of Wooyoung’s favorite activities was annoying you or pranking you with your brother.

Eventually, the three of you were grown-up enough that Jongho and Wooyoung didn’t bother you as often. You both were still in school -- you in high school while the pair was just starting middle since Wooyoung ended up staying back a year in grade school -- and while you did often see Wooyoung around your house during afternoons and weekends, his presence didn’t annoying you nearly as much as it used to. 

It wasn’t until Jongho was 15 and Wooyoung was 16 that you realized just how accustomed you’d gotten to having Wooyoung around, because you stopped seeing him. He was no longer on the couch with your brother, yelling at the video games they’d play on the TV after school. You no longer walked into the kitchen to see him rummaging through your fridge like he was in his own house. Wooyoung just...stopped coming around.

And Jongho was noticeably sadder, too.

“What happened to Jung Wooyoung?” you had asked him after about a week of no sign of your brother’s best friend.

Jongho sighed, looking more depressed than ever after hearing you mention his best friend since childhood, “He was sent away.”

“Sent away?” you repeated with furrowed brows. “Where? Why?”

“His parents said they sent him away to an all-boys school because he was acting out,” he explained.

Maybe Wooyoung acted differently at his own home than he did at your house, but you didn’t think the younger boy acted out at all. Maybe when he was a child, but he’d been fine the last 5-ish years. It didn’t make sense to you, but then again, you didn’t know Wooyoung very well.

However, you didn’t know it, but you were right. Wooyoung hadn’t been acting out at all. His parents wouldn’t tell anybody, but they’d actually kicked Wooyoung out of their home and sent him away to live with his uncle whom they’d disowned from their family because he was a werewolf.

And so was Wooyoung.

Wooyoung had gone missing for about three of those days that he wasn’t around your house. It was something most teenagers who first shifted would do, unsure what else to do after becoming a giant wolf. His parents had a feeling what had happened since his father had seen it happen with his brother. When Wooyoung had eventually returned, his parents confronted him about what happened, and the poor boy was immediately shunned and sent away. But when Jongho went to ask, they lied and said he went to a different school far away now.

Jongho was sure without any type of contact with his best friend, he’d never see Wooyoung again.

But you never thought much of him again. Jongho did eventually make new friends, and while he didn’t talk about him often anymore, he did think of Wooyoung every now and then, recalling the good times they had and wondering what he was doing with his new life. But you carried on with your life, eventually going off to college and only seeing Jongho when you went back home to visit. 

There was one instance where Jongho had come to you at your apartment, though. He was sweaty and out of breath, seeming panicked. His eyes were a scary crimson that had you gasping and stepping back from him, unsure why they looked like that. But he kept saying he didn’t know where to go or what to do.

That was when you found out Jongho was a werewolf. You weren’t sure what to do with that information, either, but you helped him go to your parents with the information. Your mother had said her great grandfather was one, but they weren’t sure if anyone else in their family would get what they expected to be the werewolf gene. But thankfully, they were accepting and went to your grandmother for some help and advice.

During his time in college, Jongho had found some new friends that he started living off campus with. They seemed to make him happy, and he spoke about them like they were family. He had confirmed they were his pack, and you were happy that he managed to find them. You thought it was sweet that your brother had new friends in college that he cared about and who seemed to care about him, as well.

“Oh, and hey, do you remember Jung Wooyoung?” Jongho asked while he was first gushing about his friends.

“That little twerp you were friends with since forever?” you chuckled. 

“Yeah,” he laughed. “Well, he's in it too! He lives with them!”

Your eyebrows raised in surprised, “Wow. It’s been years since you’ve seen him.”

“I know!”

“It’s like you two were meant to be brothers this whole time,” you told him with a laugh. “That’s kind of crazy. Fate’s really amazing, huh...”

“You should come visit sometime. I think you’ll really like the guys. Hongjoong’s really cool, and Yunho’s pretty goofy but he’s sweet. San’s kinda flirty but he’s really nice and stuff when you get to know him. I think you’ll get along well with Seonghwa and Yeosang, honestly.”

“Oh yeah? Why’s that?”

“Because you were always no fun growing up,” he teased.

But you did eventually go visit your brother. It had been a little while since you’d seen him anyway, so you figured why not. Besides, he seemed really excited about his pack and especially getting to reconnect with his childhood best friend. Honestly, you were a little bit curious to see how Wooyoung grew up.

What you didn’t expect when you arrived was to see Jung Wooyoung for the first time since you were in high school, and see him as so much more than just your little brother’s annoying friend.

Jung Wooyoung had grown up to be more handsome than you could’ve even imagined if you’d ever bothered to remember him. As soon as your eyes landed on him as he walked out the door to catch up with the pack while your brother excitedly greeted you from the driveway, you felt a massive crush on him hit you. And if this was what your grandmother had told you, Jongho, and your parents about, this was something more serious than just a human crush.

For Wooyoung, his entire world stopped. All he saw was you in his vision, everyone and everything else falling away. His heart was beating out of his chest, his palms suddenly felt clammy, and he had the strong urge to run right up to you and just wrap you up in his arms.

He had imprinted on his childhood best friend’s sister.

Thankfully, with Jongho’s excitement to introduce you to the pack, he hadn’t picked up on that. However, the same couldn’t be said for the pack. Seonghwa easily noticed, Hongjoong had a very strong suspicion, and Yeosang thought it was so painfully obvious that he couldn’t believe that Jongho didn’t realize when he had re-introduced the two of you and you finally had to properly acknowledge each other.

Yunho was the only one who didn’t notice, thinking that was just how Wooyoung was. He was very flirty with, well, just about anybody. So the older boy didn’t have reason to think anything of it.

But it was silently decided that nobody would tell Jongho about it. Neither you nor Wooyoung knew how to tell him. Jongho had become very protective of you ever since becoming a werewolf, so not only were you afraid of possibly upsetting him, but Wooyoung definitely was. Not only was Jongho his brother now, but they had been best friends since they could remember, and they had finally reuinted. He didn’t want to ruin their relationship, and neither did you. And since neither of you ever said anything, the rest of the pack knew it wasn’t their place.

Eventually, another werewolf came into the picture: Song Mingi. He was tall, a little awkward, but very sweet and funny. He had imprinted on his best friend, Aera, who he hadn’t told yet and insisted everyone associated with the pack never speak of it to her -- that included you. You weren’t at the pack house often -- Wooyoung would simply sneak out to visit you at your apartment because that was way easier -- but you were glad that Mingi’s situation overshadowed your own. The less attention on you and Wooyoung, the better.

Until Mingi ended up telling Aera, and then someone had to go and open their big, stupid mouth and ruin everything for you.

Jongho had invited you over for dinner to sort of ‘celebrate’ Mingi finally telling Aera after however many years that she was his mate. They, like Jongho and Wooyoung, had grown up together and were best friends throughout their whole lives. You were shocked Mingi managed to keep his secret for so long, but you were happy for him that he finally told her. Besides, Aera was always so laid back and relaxed. You figured she’d be fine with the whole situation.

“I still can’t believe you made a mistake that stupid,” you chuckled as the pack launched joke after joke toward Mingi’s lapse of thought which caused Aera to find out. “Even I know to be more careful than that.”

“Yeah, but you have family that’ve been telling you about werewolves since Jongho was in high school,” Mingi pouted. “My parents still don’t even know.”

“Guess they’re next on the list of people to tell,” Yeosang joked lightly, knowing Mingi was getting a little grumpy from all the teasing.

Yunho snorted before laughing, “Where are Wooyoung and _____ on that list?”

However, the joke that was meant to lighten the mood only made it worse. The air seemed to thicken almost immediately as everyone but the oblivious werewolf froze, eyes unsure if they wanted to look at you, Wooyoung, Jongho, or just continue staring at the table. It was so silent after Yunho’s laughter turned awkward and then quickly died down that even you could’ve heard a pin drop from outside. But after what felt like an eternity of just dead silence, something finally broke it that made you wish you’d continued to just sit in the quiet.

“What?” Jongho asked sharply.

From the end of the table, you heard Mingi mumble, “What was that about stupid mistakes?”

[juststrugglingwithstress]

Siblings in Writing

(edit: this was not supposed to be as mean/angry as it sounded! this is really just one type of sibling relationship, albeit a type of relationship i often see underrepresented in writing. my experiences are not everybody’s experiences, and i’m sorry for the parts of this post that make it sound that way. use whatever kind of sibling relationship you’d like--just make sure your siblings have fought (small or big disagreements) at least once!)

ANGRY INTRO

yall. PLEASE. NOT ALL SIBLINGS CALL EACH OTHER “sissy”, “sis”, OR “bro”.

I DON’T CARE HOW CLOSE THEY ARE. ANY AND EVER SIBLING PAIR HAS FOUGHT. and TWINS?? a lot of twins aren’t as close as you think they are. i know like 3 pairs of twins and usually they are TEARING EACH OTHER’S THROATS OUT.

me and my brother???? we have our nice moments where hes like “hey adele look at this thing i drew, do you like it? i don’t think i did a good job but--”

“i think it’s really cool”

but most of the time???????? he calls me bitch and i insult him TO THE MAX.

PLEASE EVEN IF THE SIBLING PAIR YOU ARE WRITING ABOUT IS CLOSE, THERE IS NO POSSIBLE WAY THEY ARE AS CLOSE AS YOU THINK THEY ARE.

younger siblings do things they would never, ever do with anybody else solely for the purpose of annoying their older sibling. older siblings, at times, will go into homicidal rage.

ALTERNATE GREETINGS:

“what’s up?” “go away” “no”

*silence*

“hey” “hi” *separate ways*

“hey full name other doesn’t usually use” “I literally hate you so much”

older: “NAMEEEEEEE! mom/dad/other wants you!” younger: “fuck off” older: “i’m going to break your nose” younger: “with mom/dad/other standing right there? yeah sure”

younger: “why are you here” older: “cause it’s my room, fuck nugget, get out”

older: “WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU IN MY ROOM” younger: “oof someone had a bad day” older: “IM GOING TO KILL YOU”

“i hate your face” “cool, i have food” “give me some”

“NAMMMMMMEEEEEEE! dinner’s ready!” “yeah yeah okay give me a second i’ll be right down”

“why did you have to come here?” “this is,,,, our house,,,,, that i too live in” “yeah but i was hoping you’d get run over by a bus” “why thank you, i was too”

MORE ABOUT TWINS

i dont care if you want your siblings to be close or whatever, do you know how INFURIATING it is to have a twin????? especially an IDENTICAL ONE???

if you have identical twins, they are going to hate each other’s guts for 3/4s (or more) of the time. having somebody who looks just like you, living in the same house as you, probably going to the same school as you, who has the same birthday as you, and most likely sleeps in/super close to the room you sleep in? actual hell. especially if they have a lot of the same interests/friends as you do. this experience is horror in it’s rawest form. nobody wants this. they want the “close, happy twins who do EVERYTHING together and have since they were born!!!”

IMAGINE A SIBLING RELATIONSHIP, BUT THEY LOOK J U S T  L I K E  Y O U AND ARE A L W A Y S  W I T H  Y O U.

remember what i said about hell?

(possibility: if the one identical twin is better at something or more liked than the other, it fuckin sucks. imagine this experience in the school halls: “eva???? what are you wearing???? oh my god, did your mom mix up your clothes with jasmine’s again? i feel sooo bad for you!!”

“actually this is... jasmine. eva has spanish right now.”

“oh. whatever.”

sucks, right?)

forcing that kind of relationship on your fictional twins is both unrealistic and tbh kind of scary.

now, twins who don’t look the same. everything i just said, but minus the appearance. yeah. i can see the shitshow now!

THE YOUNGER SIBLING DILEMMA

coming from an older sibling, younger siblings are satan.

they will:

annoy the older sibling at all costs

never do anything the older sibling says

“why does SHE/HE/THEY get to be in charge!!!!” whines the sibling who is literally four years younger and still can’t spell phone without replacing the “ph” with “f”

snitchin little bitches

older sibling: *flicks younger lightly on arm* younger sibling, tears of lies and deceit running down their face while they grin, knowing they will be believed: MOOOOOOOM NAME PUNCHED MEEEEEEEEEE

eat all the sweets

then they will blame it on the older sibling

literally, they will blame anything on the older sibling

watches an r-rated move -> name said it was alright!!!! (i most certainly DID NOT)

“MOOOOOOOOOOM NAME ISNT LETTING ME HANG OUT WITH HER FRIEEEEEENDDDDDDSSS” “YOU HAVE COME WITH US 16 TIMES THIS WEEK”

admittedly, they can be cool 1/324532 of the time. make sure to include these cool moments once in a blue moon bc sadly they do happen

POSSIBLY will feel like older gets more attention sometimes

DEFFINETLY feels like the older gets more freedom

OLDER SIBLINGS

i, as an older sibling, am biased. ill do my best tho

insults the younger sibling (SOMETIMES unfairly actually a lot unfairly)

ill add this to younger in a moment but on the flipside the younger sibling probably feels like the OLDER sibling gets more attention instead

takes out problems on sibling/family (to be fair when younger grows up they do this too)

“pshhhhhhhh, TRUST me, you do NOT want a sibling”

*to friend* “i literally hate him/her/them/other so much. i would kill him/her/them/other if i had the chance” “no you wouldn’t” “are you sure”

“nah man, you can’t talk shit about him/her/them/other, only I can talk shit about my sibling” *immediate fist fight/verbal decimation*

if a younger child is talking shit, they will be BLACKLISTED AND DESTROYED. probably more than is fair.

probably has hurt the younger sibling pretty badly at some point, most likely by accident but if it doesnt fit you storyline,,,, i have done despicable things

underestimates their strength when dealing with younger sibling

“WHY WONT YOU JUST FUCKING LISTEN TO ME” “YOURE NOT MOM” “YEAH BUT MOM PUT ME IN CHARGE DIPSHIT”

“i am not his/her/their/other parent, why do i have to do this”

younger sibling, to older: “son of a bitch” “we literally have the same mother”

“I SWEAR TO GOD CAN YOU EVEN DRESS YOURSELF???? CAN YOU???? CAN YOU????????????”

“haha ur scared of the daaaaaarrrrrrrk” older says, as their brain is in a panic about whether or not there’s a serial killer in the dark room waiting to kill them

so yeah. i have so many metas i need to write about so many things

[vinceaddams]

obvs feel free to keep this private, but I got recommended the UFH channel by a friend of mine, haven't gotten around to watching anything from it. I trust your judgement on the content, but my friend considers it her main resource 🙃 of course, since you only watched a few videos you might not be able to answer this, but was there any specific really bad/unacademic approaches I should keep my eye out for that my friend might have adopted? we work on a historical festival together so im concern

(I was going to answer this privately but then it got really long and turned into a post I want to post.)

Oh dear! Well, It appears that the lady behind that channel only cares about the 20th century, so maaybe she’s got good stuff on the 20th century at least? I don’t know, but the 2 videos that I saw were so incredibly awful that I’m highly suspicious of all her stuff. 

The first bad thing about her channel is that her videos all have a one or two sentence caption and nothing else. (I clicked on a few more just to check) No sources listed, no links of any kind except to her merch store. I don’t recall her mentioning any particular sources for any of the things she said in the videos either, she just declared them very matter of factly. 

Good historians cite sources! Bernadette Banners’ video on the history of PPE has so many source links she ran out of room in the description box and had to put the rest of them on a page on her website.  (Oh poo, now I feel a bit bad because I love Karolina Zebrowska but she really needs to do better with leaving source links. But she does talk about doing research, talk in a more nuanced way, and doesn’t present herself as an expert or academic, unlike the UFH lady.)

Good historians also embrace nuance, and aren’t afraid to say “I don’t know” or “I was wrong”. Presenting things in a “this person did this one big thing, and then this happened, and that caused this” kind of way isn’t good because history is more like “all these things happened and as far as we can tell it appears to have influenced this, which was also connected to this other stuff that we don’t know all that much about”. History is foggy and complicated, no matter how much the general public wants it to be simple.

Her description of herself also seems a bit... misleading? In her about page on youtube it says “Amanda Hallay, a college professor specializing in fashion, costume, and cultural history.” but if you look at the CV linked on her website the only degrees she has are in creative writing and art history. I’m not saying a person can’t be really knowledgable about something without a degree, but her whole online presence is about being a “professor” who teaches this stuff so I find it weird.

And if the 1850′s-60s video is anything to go by, she presents things in a shockingly unprofessional way. She starts off by saying she thinks these fashions are ugly and ridiculous and that she has some “theories of her own” on them. @marzipanandminutiae has a post with a lot more about what was wrong with that video, and a few others I haven’t seen. She claims that hoop skirts were oppressive cages when in reality they were a liberating garment that allowed women to achieve full skirts without the heavy layered petticoats they wore previously. 

She posts a photo of a naked lady and says “Now lets start with a beautiful naked lady and cover her up with ugly and unflattering clothes. Now this sexy naked lady isn’t so sexy” I wish I was making this up but that’s almost word for word what she said. Along with a whole lot of untrue or exaggerated stuff about Victorian modesty. She says dresses with layered flounces were called “pagoda dresses”, which isn’t a term that anyone has ever used for those dresses. She says this is cut down from a longer video she uses for teaching class, and I find the thought of this being presented in a classroom quite appalling.

After spending about 95% of the video talking about womens fashion in an extremely condescending and disdainful tone of voice, she posts what appear to be the 5 biggest and most extreme examples of 19th century moustaches she could find, presenting them as if they were what every man looked like.

This part really grinds my gears, because she says “I haven’t said anything about menswear because there’s really not much to say.” She posts photos of suits from 5 different decades and says they’re basically all the same, and also basically the same as a modern suit. Excuse you, there is A LOT of difference between menswear of the 1850′s and the 1890′s. Yes the changes over the decades are more subtle, and the colours are often more subdued than in centuries past, but it is absolutely not (as she claims) “the century when men stopped doing fashion”.   I personally am not hugely interested in 19th century mens fashion, and can tentatively date things in the first few decades but after the middle of the century I can’t. But people who are interested and who study that era can tell the decades apart. Because they’re different. And there is SO MUCH to talk about! Suits for different levels of formality, accessories, waistcoats, sportswear, sleepwear, knitwear, swimsuits, loungewear, underwear, etc. are all extremely different from their modern equivalents. 

It’s perfectly fine to only study womens fashion if that’s what you’re interested in, but it is not okay to then declare that the history of mens fashion is worthless and nonexistent. Simply not being interested in a thing is no excuse for publicly shitting all over it. (I’ve seen people do this more than once. We already have so few men who do historical fashion stuff! Stop putting off newcomers who might be interested!!)

The fact that her online presence is so closed off is also highly unusual. Comments are turned off for her videos, and the only social media link she has is to a private facebook group. (There is also a link to a fb page, but it appears to have been deleted.) Turning off comments is of course the personal choice of the one posting the videos, but the fashion history side of youtube usually tends towards pretty decent comment threads, and people often have nice little discussions and learn stuff in them. Here it looks like she doesn’t want discussion, doesn’t want to be contradicted or asked for sources, doesn’t want to learn new things.

I had never even heard of this channel until I saw @marzipanandminutiae mention it, nor have I ever heard any of the many historical costumers/youtubers I follow mention it, yet somehow it has 55k followers? I don’t know the demographics that watch it (especially not with the comments turned off!) but I’d wager that videos like the 1850′s-60′s one I suffered through are mainly watched by people who like hearing things trash talked, rather than people who actually want to learn about fashion history. The same sort of people who loved that Beau Brummell twitter thread, which was also full of lies and unsourced garbage. People like to believe the past was way worse and grosser than it was because it makes them feel like we’re smarter and better now.

Lastly, the whole premise of the channel is just bad. Calling any one thing “The Ultimate Fashion History” is a bad idea. Her channel trailer says “Youtube’s number one channel for original fashion history content” “we’ve got it all, fifty thousand years of fashion history”. You can’t have one channel that’s the ultimate resource for ALL of fashion history! It’s a huge, HUGE subject, and even if she did do actual good research she’d barely be able to scratch the surface of fifty thousand years. That’s like saying one channel is the ultimate source for all of science, or all of music, or all of cooking. No one thing can come close to covering all of it. I will deign to admit that she’s at least right to call it “original”, because she has some very original lies I haven’t found anywhere else. 

Most people who study fashion history/historical sewing have one or several eras they like best and find most interesting, perhaps with occasional jaunts into other eras. This way we can focus and get a much better understanding of the eras that we find most interesting, rather than just a vague notion of everything. 

For example: I’m most interested in 18th century menswear, and so far have mainly researched and sewn 1785-95 stuff, and more recently some 1730′s. I usually focus on fashionable civilian clothing, so I don’t know as much about working class clothes, and next to nothing about military and other occupational dress. Even with this narrow area of interest, which I’ve been obsessed with for many years, I still have so much to learn! I could never make anything claiming to be the ultimate source for 18th century menswear, because I’m just one person focusing on some aspects, and there are other people out there who research other aspects of it and their work is just as important. It’s all so big and so much, even if you narrow it down to one era.

Amanda Hallay is basically holding up a bucket of saltwater and calling it the ocean.

I haven’t watched any of her 20th century videos, so maybe they’re better than the older ones I watched. I don’t know. (But even if they’re actually good they still don’t have source links.) Edit: okay, nope, turns out they’re just as bad! They appear to make up the vast majority of her videos, so if she’s most interested in the 20th century then maybe she should just... make her channel more clearly 20th century focused instead of trying to paint it as a channel for all eras?

TL;DR, the main bad things about that channel are:

Lying and making ridiculous claims, not citing ANY sources. Spouting easily debunked myths.

Stating things matter of factly without any nuance, even though history is foggy and complicated.

Being extremely judgemental about historical fashions and talking about how much she hates them and thinks they’re ugly, which really isn’t appropriate for a fashion history teacher. You can hear the disgust in her voice and it’s awful and I hate it.

Comments turned off on all her videos, leaving no way to communicate or have public discussions. Unknowing viewers are left to accept her statements as fact without any outside opinions.

Claiming one channel is the ultimate channel for an incalculably enormous subject. Says it covers 50,000 years of fashion history when it’s mostly just the 20th century.

I would like to add that I am not what I would consider an expert either, and have no formal education in fashion history beyond the one college class that was part of my 2 year sewing course. I have learned mainly from books and the internet, and as I said earlier I still have a huge amount to learn. I’m sure a more knowledgable historian could put things better than I have. 

But I’m confident in stating that primary sources are needed to back up a claim! Sometimes even widely accepted beliefs turn out to be entirely unfounded myths, like that one about doctors using vibrators to treat “hysteria”. Total nonsense someone made up in 1999.

Wow this post got way longer than intended. Anyways, yes, I do not like condescending slideshow lady.

[peggyrose19]

Everything is Falling Apart - Part 3

I’m trying to not make this as angsty and give it a maybe happy ending? but as mentioned I have no control over these characters, I let them do what they want. Also straight up don’t realize how painful my writing is until people tell me, so. There’s that. Moving on. This whole thing ended up a lot longer than I ever intended it to be, but I’m not mad about it. Writing angst is fun. All of your wails and cursings of my name have been quite amusing to me. Am I a horrible person for that? It’s possible. Whatever. Hopefully this will be the last part, at least I’m intending it to be. If it’s not I’m mildly afraid @im-oknutzy-trash will kill me. She says I need to go back to writing fluff instead. I guess she doesn’t enjoy having her heart destroyed. *shrug* love you Hannah! 

Also, can you tell I’m not from New York? I’ve been a handful of times, so I did my best. No, I did absolutely no research since most of this was written in bed when I was supposed to be sleeping or during class when I was supposed to be paying attention. 

Characters belong to the amazing amazing @lumosinlove, AU is Clandestine by my fav @heyitssmiller, and shout out to @awanderingdeal for the cactus name! Thank you for that. Hope you all enjoy and don’t cry too hard. As always, leave a comment and I’ll love you forever. 

“Logan?”

The voice shook him from his thoughts.  

“Yes,” he blurted out. Finn frowned. “I mean no. Yeah, no. Wait, fuck- argh.” He stopped, taking a deep breath. “I mean, I won’t run away from you, not this time. You’re right, that was… that was not good of me to do.” He ran a hand through his hair, searching for what to say. “Merde, I didn’t think it’d be this hard.”

“Lo.” Finn reached across the table and laid a hand over Logan’s. “It’s okay, really.”

He sighed. “No, it’s not. I hurt you. Badly. And I’m really sorry for that. You- you didn’t deserve that.” 

“It’s alright. I hurt you too, I know I did.”

“Finn, no you didn’t.” Logan shook his head. “You were nothing but good to me, and I just left. I left you in that apartment with all of Leo’s things still there and all those memories of us, of him. I left. And you might have forgiven me, but I haven’t forgiven myself for that.” 

Finn bit his lip, unsure how to respond. 

“It was really hard,” he admitted finally. 

“What did you do with all his stuff?”

“It’s in a storage locker. I couldn’t bear to go through it all.”

“D’you-” Logan stopped himself. 

“What?”

“Do you think we could go through it together? I just… I don’t have anything of Leo’s anymore. And I don’t want to forget him. Please?”

Finn took a shaky breath. “Yeah. Yeah, we can do that.” 

“Okay. Thank you.”

“You really mean it? That you’ll stay this time? Because I really want that.”

“Yeah. I mean it.” 

It was a few days before Logan saw Finn again. He spent his time wandering New York City, exploring the place Finn had grown up. It was fascinating to imagine him as a little boy with his bright hair, scurrying about the city with his older brother, causing mischief and giving his parents brain aneurysms. 

When Finn called him, it was Wednesday afternoon and he was in his hotel room, staring aimlessly at the television.

“Hey.” 

Logan swallowed. “Hey.” 

“So, uh, I’ve got some time tomorrow, if you wanna, you know… “

“For the storage locker?”

“Yeah, that. Um, I can meet you there or we can head over together. Best way to get there is by train.”

“I-” Logan thought for a moment of all the things he hadn’t gotten to say yet. “I’ll go with you, if that’s alright with you.”

“Yeah. Yeah, that’s fine. Okay. Good. I’ll uh, I’ll send you the details tonight.”

“Okay. I’ll uh, I’ll see you then, I guess.” 

“See you.” 

After Finn had ended the call, Logan sat for a long time. It had been like this every time they talked, a strange feeling of the past, present, and future all colliding together into one. He wasn’t quite sure what to do with it. 

When Logan reached the train station the next day, Finn was there waiting for him, glasses perched on his nose. He stopped for a moment as images flashed through his mind. Finn peering over his shoulder at the mission outline, glasses slipping down his nose. Logan reaching up and pushing them back on. Finn taking his contacts out at the end of each long day, blinking away the dryness in his eyes. Late nights with the three of them sprawled on the couch, all tangled limbs and soft kisses as they relaxed into each other, knowing they were home. 

Logan blinked back to reality. That was the past, he told himself firmly. It would do no good to dwell over something that couldn’t happen again. Shaking his head at himself, Logan crossed to Finn, coming to a halt at his side.

“Hi.” 

Finn jumped a bit. “Hey. You snuck up on me.”

“What kind of spy are you, if you’re that easy to scare?”

“Excuse you, I am an excellent spy. I’ll have you know I won Brad three years in a row.” 

Logan laughed. “How could I forget. You still have it?”

Finn looked affronted. “Of course I do! What kind of question is that?”

“Oh, sorry. Of course you do, why did I think otherwise?”

Fin was saved from having to respond by the loud horn of a train as it approached the station. It came to a stop with a hiss and the doors opened. 

“This is us,” Finn said, and they boarded, finding seats together near the back. It was quieter there, with fewer people.

They didn’t talk the whole way there. Logan sat in silence, searching for something to say, but he came up with nothing. What does one say to the boy they used to love? 

When they reached their stop, nerves suddenly bloomed in Logan’s chest. He hadn’t really thought too hard about what they were doing, more focused on Finn sitting beside him. But as they walked the few short blocks to the storage facility, his stomach began to churn. The building loomed before them, making Logan’s heart race.

“I-” He froze. Finn glanced back at him.

“Hey, Lo,” he said gently, walking back and grabbing his hand. “The moment you want to leave, we will. It’ll be okay. I’m right here with you.” 

Logan took a deep breath. Finn always seemed to know what to say. He looked up at Finn’s worried eyes and gave him a small nod. Still holding hands, the two entered the building. 

“I can’t believe we’re actually doing this,” Finn said quietly as they stood before the opened door of the storage unit. Logan clung to his hand. 

As one, they stepped inside. 

Finn grabbed the first box and tugged it open, Logan still at his side. 

“This should have his clothing,” he said, reading the label on the inside flap. He was right; inside were piles of Leo’s old shirts and sweatpants, a few pairs of jeans, some hoodies. Logan pulled out a sweatshirt, soft and faded, one from Leo’s high school, his favorite. He pressed it to his face.

“It doesn’t smell like him anymore,” he murmured. Finn didn’t say anything. He moved onto another box. Logan pulled Leo’s sweatshirt over his head. It went down to his knees. 

“Look at this,” Finn said, looking into the box he’d just opened. Inside were stacks of pictures. 

“You didn’t keep these?” Logan asked, pulling one out. It was the three of them in the park by their apartment, bundled against the cold and leaning into each other, taken by a kind passer-by. The picture had sat on the mantel. Logan had looked at it every day and thought about how lucky he was. 

“No. They just made me sad.” Finn pulled out an envelope, full of unframed photographs. He laughed a little as he began sorting through them. “Remember this?”

In his hand was a series of mugshots of the two of them, nearly unrecognizable in their disguises, both fighting a grin.

Logan snorted. “Do I ever. I kissed you for the first time that night.”

Finn smirked. “I nearly lost my mind when you did that.” 

“So did I.” 

They fell silent again as Finn kept looking at the pictures and Logan moved further into the room. He wasn’t really looking for much, just skimming the labels on the boxes and things left out. But one gave him pause. It was smaller, labelled “Leo Trinkets” in Finn’s neat handwriting. Curious, Logan opened it. 

Inside were, in fact, trinkets. As Logan began sorting through them, he started to recognize them. A small rock he’d found on an op, the same color as Leo’s eyes. Cooking stickers he’d found on a bike ride, the ones Leo said were too precious to ever use. The rainbow mug he’d bought for pride month, Leo’s name in cursive on the side. 

He dug deeper and deeper into the box, a new memory surfacing with each item. Every small trinket or bobble he’d ever gotten for Leo, placed lovingly in this small box. Logan didn’t notice he was crying until his tears fell onto the novel he was holding, the first-edition copy of Leo’s favorite book he’d found for his birthday. 

“You okay?” Finn asked quietly, setting a hand on his shoulder.

Logan sobbed, “I can’t believe he kept all this. I can’t believe you kept it.”

“Of course I kept it,” Finn sniffed. “We kept everything you ever gave us.” 

“Really?”

“Yes. Everything you gave me is in a box in my apartment. Some of it is still out. Like that funny little cactus you got me. I named it Sir Prick-a-Lot.“

Logan gave him a little smile. “Of course you named it something stupid.”

“Ah! Rude.”  When Logan didn’t answer, Finn’s smile faded. He was still staring down at the book in his hands.“Do you wanna bring that stuff back with you?” he asked. Logan just nodded.

Carefully, they packed everything back up, adding a few other things to the box; a few pictures, some of his old clothes. A little while later, they shut the lights off, leaving everything else for another day. 

On the train ride home, Logan held his box close to his chest. Finn sat beside him, their shoulders and knees pressed together. They didn’t say anything.

Logan thought of all the things he’d wanted to say. But maybe not all of them needed to be said. He looked over at Finn, then down at the box in his arms. He didn’t want to forget, to move on. He missed them. And he knew he couldn’t get Leo back. But maybe he could get Finn back, even just as a friend. He was tired of being alone. 

“Finn?”

“Yeah.”

“I still love you, too.”

[ramuoto]

TOP 10 MANHWAs

if anything good came out of 2020, it’s my discovery of manhwas. 

well, it’s not like i’ve never read a single manhwa in the past 15+ years but tbh, the ratio of manhwa:manga i consume on a weekly basis has jumped exponentially this year. previously it was like 1:99 and now it’s like 90:10 LMAO. 

so, just to remind myself that the world is still full of good things, i had to make this list. which i will probably edit in the future, if i can be bothered to. :) 

anyhow, this list was not made in any particular order, just whichever came into mind. it’s loooong so be prepared! (I’ve read way more titles than mentioned but just included the ones worth checking out)

for whoever stumbles across this list, i hope some of these resonate with you and i hope they make you as happy as they made me. 

pic credits: https://geekculture.co/geeks-guide-to-transmigration-novels-avoid-death-at-all-costs/

1. Ebony

https://mangadex.org/title/41838/ebony

Bahahah omg he looks evil there! But our dearest archduke is hardly that aww. Soz, I just ripped off the covers of the manhwa cos I can’t find a panel I liked more than another. I mean, this manhwa is a GEM. I can’t even begin to describe this because everything about it blew me away. This is not something you read when you are craving for fluff, or just wanna have something brainless after a hard day at work or if you just wanna have some eye candy lol. This is something you pick up on a weekend, when you have time, because you need those hours to digest, appreciate, clutch your chest, tear a little because you find yourself falling in love with these characters. It doesn’t have any of that cliche isekai, romance, revenge themes going on. It has a solid plot, backed by incredible characters, beautifully woven by the authors and artist with incredible pacing that keeps you on your toes and keeps you looking forward to the next chapter. Maybe I would have been happier if I found it after it was completed lol. HAVE I CONVINCED YOU ENOUGH TO MAKE YOU WANNA READ IT?! like, idk, just go. JUST GO READ IT GDI. 

p.s. it says there romance but naaaaaaah, dont go in with that expectation. :) this story is so much more than that. 

2. Bring the love

https://mangadex.org/title/44472/bring-the-love

This...this!!! THIS MANHWA NEEDS MORE LOVE. If you need a lot of fluff, a little, ok maybe quite a bit of sadness and tragedy, sweet sweet romance, cutie pies, please, look no further!!! Again, pacing, character development are so important to me and this manhwa aces it. I love the 2 MCs very much. And the side characters too. :)

3.  A Stepmother's Märchen

https://mangadex.org/title/39474/a-stepmother-s-m-rchen

When I first read this, i fucking cried. like please don’t ask me why. it’s not like its an absolute tragedy but I was just rooting for the MC so much and I really want for everything to go her way. That’s how much I adore this MC!!! I LOVE HER. I LOVE HER MORE THAN YOU DO NORA! HAHAHHA. okay soz. I need to keep this spoiler-free.

Anyhoo, there is nothing typical about this time travel plot. Sure, she goes back to try to undo the stuff that went wrong but phew, she certainly changed things so much everything that comes her way have made it so her previous experiences can hardly help aaaaaaand that’s what makes it fun! I sometimes wish the pacing could be a little more consistent, and there could be more characters I could love a little more wholeheartedly (so i wont have to be in so much despair when i read this sometimes lol) but omg the art, isn’t it pretty?! I’ve re-read this soooooo many times but the art blows me away all the time. And have I already mentioned how much I love her?! I LOVE YOU SHULI! AND I WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY!

4.  Lady Baby

https://mangadex.org/title/34691/lady-baby

I literally LOL-ed when I saw this cover. WHO THE HELL ARE THEY. WHAT LADY BABY?! ehehehe. okay anyway, uhm, this is already incredibly popular. im not sure if i need to elaborate but yes, it’s adorbs!!! i dont think i like the MC as much as i love her family lol. and everyone else who adores her. im looking forward to when they get older. :) actually not really. please stay cute for as long as yall can! but yeah, i do wish the plot can move a lil faster. i want to see more character development in the other kids too COME ON! 

5.  Death Is the Only Ending for the Villainess

https://mangadex.org/title/47754/death-is-the-only-ending-for-the-villainess

am i allowed to reveal how shallow i am rn? like the previous choices were all like ‘wow-deep-plot’, ‘wow-character-development’ and this one i just included cos of AESTHETICS ALONE?! the novel covers are breathtaking!!! the manhwa art is amazing as well. and the harem is great! LOL. as for plot... uhm... it’s alright. it’s pretty engaging and i quite like the MC, she’s smart and independent and i love how she views them all antagonistically at all times HAHAHHA. her past is kinda... weird though and i do wish they’d stop referencing it. cos... girl why do you wanna go back to reality!!! stay here! it’s way more exciting! 

i love the whole isekai/reincarnate/transmigration theme and this is honestly one of the better, not-so-cliche or cheesy ones HA.

6.  Beware of the Villainess!

https://mangadex.org/title/47286/beware-of-the-villainess

do you already see the whole villainess theme?! am i suppose to start feeling embarrassed about my choices?! NO! cos this one is AWESOME!

again, another wildly popular title. for good reasons. it’s hilarious, our MC is as real and candid as it gets and LOOK AT THAT BLUE HAIRED BEAUTY. DO YOU SEE HIM?! IMPLANT HIM INTO YOUR MEMORY NOW!

it’s highly entertaining and breaks all isekai-reincarnation-villainess plot stereotypes. definitely one of the titles i look forward to every week.

7.  Who Made Me a Princess

https://mangadex.org/title/32506/who-made-me-a-princess

what? why did i choose this?

BECAUSE OF CLAUDE OF COURSE. ahahaha. okay aside from the amaaaaaaazing art and the beautiful people, the plot is not too bad. a little extreme at times but it’s interesting enough to keep me going. it’s currently on hiatus though and i was highly annoyed by how the first season ended. (YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT HAPPENED? NOTHING.)

i hope the plot can move faster in the next season! and that our dearest MC athanasia can you know, finally be a little more useful... like omg just tell lucas already!!! and tbh girl, no matter which guy you choose, i approve. :D 

8.  The Flower That Was Bloomed by a Cloud

https://mangadex.org/title/37648/the-flower-that-was-bloomed-by-a-cloud

i featured this before, mostly out of frustration HAHAHA. do you see why i chose this cover?! yeah, i support this (unpopular) pairing okay! the other one is doomed!!! no matter what the author is trying to do now!! I DONT SUPPORT IT!!! lol.

anyway, i had to feature this cos the art is unique! and the story is great. :) and i looooooove listening to the ost while i read it. it starts out kinda slow but as the pace picks up, you won’t be able to stop. and you find yourself conflicted at various points. it did win an award for a reason. 

no matter what, i still think dowun is best for her okay. it’s dowun or nothing. he’s devoted to her, we all know that! he just needs to ditch that annoying female guard!!! ok yknw what, maybe nothing is better. :/ *cries*

9.  Solo Leveling

https://mangadex.org/title/31477/solo-leveling

why do i even bother? this manhwa is popular enough. 

the art is great. the MC is great. i use him and his gang as my wallpaper. 

im just not sure i like how this season’s plot is progressing. :/ but i guess it brings us nearer to solving the mystery in the first leg of the manhwa. i just enjoyed the whole part of him leveling up and now that he isn’t really leveling up anymore... idk. am i hoping for more plot shit like bleach (oh wow now u quincy?)... idk man. anywho, no regrets starting on this series and marathon-ing it to death. 

cross fingers the plot picks up and doesnt get too complicated for its own good.

10.  The Reason Why Raeliana Ended Up at the Duke's Mansion

https://mangadex.org/title/31606/the-reason-why-raeliana-ended-up-at-the-duke-s-mansion

okay, tbh, by the time i reached 10, i still have like 15 other series i was considering LMAO. i even considered lengthening this top 10 to top 15. but that would just be more of me and my nonsense. so... why did i choose this?

COS I LOVE THE 2 MCs!!! they’re adorable. the plot is again, kinda far-fetched at times (i literally laugh my head off at some parts) but it’s isekai-reincarnation okay! anything is possible in whatever magical crap country you end up in! lol. and i like how straightforward it is... in the sense there’s no 2nd lead. like okay i mean they are there but we all know they have no chance. oops. sorry!

and cos i can’t give up on the other titles i have, imma just list them down, without pictures... cos im tired. HA. 

11. Doctor Elise 

https://mangadex.org/title/29474/doctor-elise 

Kudos to the huge improvement in art style lmao. The good... lovable MCs, engaging plot. The bad... sometimes lengthy, incredulous medical moments (i work in the medical field so i... idk. sometimes this borders on iryu LMAO and i need to remind myself this is romance) otherwise, this is a highly highly entertaining read.

12.  Seduce the Villain's Father

https://mangadex.org/title/46775/seduce-the-villain-s-father

This is another of my ‘father-love’ whims. MC is adorable and ML is handsome. enough said.

13.  The Villainess Lives Twice

https://mangadex.org/title/49644/the-villainess-lives-twice

This is like a lesser version of Ebony and Bring the Love combined HAHAHA. The plot and premise is great and it’s awesome to marathon! I don’t find myself loving the MC as much as I should but the ML is a darling! I just find her a little toooooooo gloomy. Like come on girl, be more spunky! 

14.  The Stereotypical Life of a Reincarnated Lady

https://mangadex.org/title/46790/the-stereotypical-life-of-a-reincarnated-lady

I dont know why I like this so much HAHAHAHA. It hardly has a plot. I just find the MC and ML amusing i guess lol. 

15.  I'm Stanning the Prince

https://mangadex.org/title/45586/i-m-stanning-the-prince

Sometimes I wonder if I should be ranking this higher but I kinda feel this manhwa is trying to achieve too much with an underpowered MC. I love her... but I just don’t like how she’s just a pawn of everyone else and I dont know how she can change this situation of hers. It’s cute though. the MC and ML.  and the ML reminds me so much of american/jap Mackenyu. 

16.  The Villainess Reverses the Hourglass

I HAD TO. the art is so pretty! but girl, dont use the hour glass so much! you look a little too old! i would appreciate it if MC stops basing too much of her moves on the “past” tho like idk you are gonna sound unoriginal soooooon like develop your own thoughts soon okay? <3

17. Inso's Law

ANOTHER ONE. omg. im a lil on the fence regarding this but i like MC too much. and her harem LOL. i dont see where the plot is going either but i just hope for a happy end... ):

18.  Why Are You Doing This, Duke?

HAHAHA. this is sooooo sooooooo cute, i would have ranked it top 15 if it wasnt licensed by tapas tho cos they are a joke. WHY NOT TAPPY GDI. 

19.  Miss Not-So Sidekick

Uh-oh. Is this a top-20 list now? anyway, the MC for this series is GOLD. im not liking where it’s currently heading tho thus the lower ranking.

20.  IRIS - Lady with a Smartphone

omg IVE NEGLECTED THIS FOR TOO LONG. lemme go buy more chapters hahahaha. it’s a tad too lengthy... otherwise i like the MC and yummy ML!

still not enough?

Special Mentions - Okay, these will be unranked cos I don’t think these are that good but probably still worth a read.

I've Become the Villainous Empress of a Novel - this is new, im looking forward to how it progresses wheeeee.

Lady to Queen - It’s a ruthless manhwa. There was a point i started reading all sorts of sadistic content (i was running out of content i swear) and this was one of the better ones. I appreciate the MC very much. the plot now is a little weird and im a bit wary of the MC’s sister... hopefully the ML can be more useful. he’s pitiful though. but dude come on, dont rely on the wrong gal.

Goodbye, In-law - I’m not sure if i like the current progress buuuuuuut MC and ML are cute so who cares.

The Duchess' 50 Tea Recipes - plot is still engaging. MC and ML are cute. i dont know where the plot is heading towards though. 

A Falling Cohabitation - this is interesting and fun but a lil lengthy.

Light and Shadow - the sequel is out!!! i highly enjoyed this entire series!!! i would have probably ranked it a lil higher if i did this post earlier but too many series have overtaken this in my heart lol.

This Girl Is a Little Wild - is the hiatus ending yet? i would add it back to top 20 if it came back LOL. it’s highly entertaining tho. ML is adorable.

The Duchess With an Empty Soul  - pretty nice. MC and ML are a little boring. i think it can end soon. LMAO.

A Capable Maid - it’s amusing how she gets her powers for all sorts of situations lol. the prince is creepy tbh. and im secretly rooting for the other king hehe.

Beware of the Brothers! - it’s cute and heart-wrenching at the same time! not too sure im digging the latest plot development but okay... i’ll take it. they’re all cuties.

Living as the Tyrant's Older Sister - hehehe. it’s cute. duke is kinda silly but the latest chapter made me squeal!!!

The Evil Lady's Hero  - idk where the plot is going but MC and ML are adorable!!!

The Dragon Next Door - HAHAHA. it’s hilarious.

The Youngest Princess - she’s growing uppppp noooooooooooo

Virtues of the Villainess - ginger is hilarious. i dont see where the plot is going tho... and cant say i like the ML yet. i dont even get to see him much, hello?!

The Justice of Villainous Woman - pretty wholesome... i like the MC! (the ML is fine. no one else to contend with so...) can u end already?! lol.

Amina of the Lamp - hey, what happened to this? it’s pretty inconsistent but i do like the MC and ML... and the art...

The Villain's Savior - this is some sadistic shit. i reserve it for when i feel sadistic. i pretty much wanna see MC happy but idk if she’s making the right choices. :/

I Don't Want to Be Empress! - HAHAHAHA uhm it’s getting interesting. i just want ML to step up more... 

La dolce vita di Adelaide - I FINISHED THIS! and it’s wholesome, feel-good and cute. some parts felt a lil extra but ah whatever.

The Black Haired Princess - plot. move. faster!!! otherwise the MC and ML are pretty cute.

The Abandoned Empress - im a lil on the fence but i know how popular this series is. it started out HORRIBLE. i hated the ML so much. and then i found the green hair boy creepy. like MC, you need better taste in boys. it’s certainly getting more interesting now though. so please, continue to make my money’s worth!!!

Lucia - i. am. not. guilty. of. anything. *smut warning* anyway go read the novel. it’s better. hehehe.

What's Wrong with Secretary Kim - i do not need to elaborate any further. 

Past loves 

I created this section just to remind myself, that what i could like one day, i could hate the next LOL.

The Monster Duchess and Contract Princess - I know this is wildly popular. but i lost interest in it once she grew up. i dont think she’s particularly lovable. soz.

Survive as the Hero's Wife - another popular choice. I find the plot kinda boring now. MC and ML are cute though. 

Sincerely: I Became a Duke's Maid - another popular one. again, boring plot. like cant it end yet? oh you mean we need to wait for the real female lead to show up? dont need luh.

I Am a Child of This House - wow. the plot is shit now. and i do not support the MC and her guard. soz. she’s OVERPOWERED tbh. 

This Is an Obvious Fraudulent Marriage - idk what happened but my enthusiasm for this died.

Charlotte and Her 5 Disciples - i don’t get it. i dont get their obsession for her. 

[tmnt-mags]

Raphael x Fem!Reader

Reader is April's little sister and meets the turtles through her. I changed the ages and timeline a bit just because I don't feel entirely comfortable writing the turtles as 15 year old kids. SO the turtles are 18 the reader is 17 nearing 18 and april is 27.

Warnings: some mention of parent death, but nothing else!

Part 1/ ??

Im still pretty new at writing fanfic and have only done a few and this is my very first tmnt one. Constructive criticism and nice things only please!

I didn't remember my dad. My mother gave birth to me a month before his death. I didn’t remember him but my big sister April did. She told me everything she could about him, all kinds of stories and old home videos. It's almost like I know him but I don’t. Sometimes it's sad and I wish for nothing more than to have some memories with him, but I’ve had a good life and have a great family. I’ve lived with my sister since our mom passed 2 years ago from cancer. I miss her a lot, but I like living with April and I love our apartment.

We both have a deep love for media. She is a reporter with Channel 6 and I started making youtube videos right around the time mom died. It was like a video diary back then and has since turned into something completely different, though there are the occasional personal diary type videos.

I was wearing my favorite oversized sweater. It was a deep forest green and nearly reached my knees. It was worn and a bit tattered in some places, but it was the coziest thing ever.. I was barefoot in the kitchen listening to April talking about the latest Foot Clan activity and thinking about the questions she was planning for some guy who worked on the docks. She had convinced her camera guy Vern to take her over there before they shot her morning segment.

“You’re gonna be late!” I called into the living room while putting some breakfastt in a container for her to take on the road.

“Thank you shorty,” She rushed in and gave me a kiss on the cheek as she grabbed her breakfast and rushed out of the kitchen again to grab her bag “I’ll either be back for dinner or late!”

“That's really specific April,” I mutter as a lean in the kitchen doorway and watch her check her purse. “Do you have your touchup bag and your toothbrush?”

April let out a small gasp and rushed back to the bathroom. She came back out with a bag, gathered her things and blew a kiss as she ran out the door. I let out a laugh and went to eat my own food.

I spent the day editing a new video. I just hit 700k last week so I was making a special video to celebrate. It had some songs that I had covered laid over a video of me painting a portrait of my mother and father. It was taken a year before he had died and they had gone on a weekend getaway in the Appalachian mountains.

I didn't look up until April burst through the door. It was already dark out and I hadn’t even noticed.

“I just witnessed a Foot Clan attack!” she called as she walked through the apartment.

“What? Oh my god! Are you okay?” I practically jumped up and followed her as she began pacing around the living room. “April? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine! There I was at the docks trying to get some answers and then BAM! They were there!” She went on about the attack and then started about some kind of vigilante that fought them off.

“Vigilante? Are you serious?” She didn't answer, she just went into her room. I sat back down on the couch and tried to process what she had said. In the end I shook it off and went get some dinner ready.

Over the next few days April was hard to find. She seemed to be constantly on the move and didn't answer her phone. She came home talking about dad's old experiments and giant turtles, and over the next 2 days seemed to just be gone. The spire on the Sacks building fell and The Shredder, who was the leader of the Foot Clan, was arrested and Eric Sacks was revealed to have been working alongside him the whole time. It was a wild time for New York, and April was suddenly quiet about the vigilantes.

Time began to move on and April started talking about these 4 new friends she had that were brothers. They seemed like a fun nice group, and the stories she shared were great.

“So,” I started as we sat together on the couch, “when do I get to meet the brothers?”

April choked on her glass of white wine. “What? Meet them?”

“Yeah, You talk about them all the time! I would like to meet them. They’re all you’ve been talking about for like 3 weeks.” I said as I pushed her with my foot.

“Ummm,” April stopped to think and had a vague look of concern on her face, “I'm not sure actually. They’re pretty busy guys.”

I narrowed my eyes at her. “Uh-huh. If you don't want me to meet them just say so. I was just curious.” I turn my face away from her.

“No it's not that, It's just they’re kinda shy. They don’t really like meeting people.” April's face said that she was telling a lie.

“Okay.” I left it at that clearly something is bugging her about me meeting her friends.

April-

April went to spend some time with the boys, but couldn’t stop thinking about them meeting her little sister. How would she react? She thought to herself, ‘I fainted when I met them, and there are still times when it kinda freaks me out a bit. I don’t want my baby sister to get scared and I don’t want the boys to get hurt because of it.’ They had tried to act like April’s reaction didn’t hurt them, but she knew it did. ‘I just want everyone to be happy.’ She was sitting in the lair watching the boys fight and Mikey brought up their Christmas pop album again. She smiled, (y/n) loved music and often performed covers on YouTube. She was really good at it. She had even written her own songs but at this point refused to release or talk about them on her channel.

“April, is something troubling you?” The brunette turned, surprised to see Master Splinter.

“Oh it’s nothing really.” She paused, “Actually could we talk? I am having some trouble.” Splinter nodded and gestured for her to follow. Not answering the questioning looks of the brothers, they went into Hashi.

“The boys avoid this room as much as possible,” Splinter said with a chuckle, “they will not listen in in here.”

“Makes sense,” April laughed and sat down on a mat with Splinter while looking at the odd structures in the room, “I’m having some trouble with my sister.”

“Oh yes, little (y/n) she had only just been born. I believe your father brought her down to the lab twice in those last weeks.” He thought back fondly on the small soft baby that looked so tiny in the arms of her father but so big compared to him then. “ what is it that is wrong?”

“She wants to meet the brothers. She doesn’t know that they are turtles, but she knows I have new friends.” April said looking down, “ we are very open. We’re the only family we have left so we always know each other's friends. It’s a safety thing I guess.”

Master Splinter hummed and looked at April, who continued.

“She wants to meet them and honestly I want her to too! I think they would all get along so well and I think the boys would adore her. It would also be nice to know that there are 4 ninjas who would look out for her.” April sighed and looked up at the ceiling.

“I just don’t want the boys to get hurt. What if she is afraid of them? What if she screams and calls them monsters or freaks? What if she passes out or cries. It would hurt them so much, and I don’t want to see my sister frightened anyway.” April’s shoulders slumped and she lowered her face to look across at Splinter.

“You know your sister well? Do you think she will react this way?” The rat questioned.

“I don’t know. This isn’t exactly a situation that has ever come up before or one I ever thought I would be in.” She played with her fingers in her lap and she watched him stroke his beard.

“I think you know your sister well and know what would be the best course of action.” He smiled, “I think the trouble now will be convincing the boys to risk meeting her. I have no doubt that it will be a split crowd.”

April nodded and gave a kind of exasperated smile. She knew exactly what he was talking about. Mikey and Ralph would agree, Donnie was iffy, but Leo would say no.

“Thank you Splinter. That does actually help. Do you mind if I stay in here a bit longer?” She asked.

“Go ahead child. Take your time.” Splinter got up and left the Hashi.

April sat and thought about what he had said. She thought back to everything she knew about her sister and what she knew of the boys. If her sister could be accepting she knew that they could have a great friendship. The boys were half a year older than her and they didn't know anyone their age. It would be nice for them to have that she thought. She knew Mikey would be super friendly right away, maybe even too friendly. Donnie would be polite but wary at first and a bit excited. Raph would be happy just to meet another person, but Leo would be cold. She feared that he would be distant and unapproachable and she knew her sister well enough to know she wouldn't be able to handle that.

She took her time and eventually rejoined the brothers. She brushed off their questions with a simple: “I needed advice.” She sat down with them as they all talked and joked around. Finally Donnie brought up the perfect opportunity.

“April you're lucky you don't have brothers.” He said as Mikey bombarded him with insane ideas for gadgets.

“Well I don't have any brothers but I do have a baby sister.” The turtles all turned towards her clearly shocked by this news. “She's actually about 4 months from turning 18.”

“Woah Angelcakes, We didn't know you had a lil’ sis. Is she as beautiful as you?” Mikey said while batting his eyes at her.

“I think she is absolutely gorgeous, and she sings and does art. She’s about to be a senior in high school.” April said while leaning closer to mikey. “Shes shorter than me and has curves for days. She used to be on the dance team actually.” April laughed and Mikey threw himself back and fanned himself with his hand.

“Why haven't you mentioned her?” Leo asked.

“You never asked if I had any siblings. She was born a few weeks before my dad died.” April smiled sadly at that “She actually asked if she could meet you.”

The boys seemed to freeze at that, and suddenly all eyes were on her.

“You told about us?”. Raph asked.

“Kinda. I might have left out the part about being ninja turtles, but I told her about my new friends and she wants to meet you guys.” Raph scoffed at her answer.

“So you didn't actually tell her about us.” He almost snapped at her.

“Cool it Raph.” leo warned.

“I don't wanna be looked at like a freak. She won't want to meet us when she sees us.” he stood up and walked off. April looked at the others who all looked like they wanted to disagree and agree with Raph at the same time.

“Sorry angelcakes, I'm sure baby angelcakes is great though.” Mikey shrugged.

April sat in disbelief that they all basically said no. The lair was quiet after that and she left after they ate some dinner.

She got home only to remember her sister was spending the night at her friends house. So she had the place all to herself. She let out a sigh and poured herself a tall glass of wine and sat on the couch thinking about the events of the day. She came up with a plan as she finished her cup and decided that by the end of the week they boys will have met her baby sister. She grabbed her phone and invited the boys to come hang out at her place for once this upcoming weekend. They didn't even ask if her sister would be there.

(Y/N)-

April had gone out to pick up some pizza for a late night dinner. I had school, homework, and some video editing to do and forgot to cook. April came home late and said not to worry about it and would grab some pizza. Her new favorite place didn’t offer delivery so she went to go get it. I decided that a nice hot shower sounded good and went in. I got out as I heard the front door open and close. I made my way to my room about to throw on my favorite green sweater only to remember that It had been washed and was in the dryer. So, I wrapped my towel back around me and opened my door to head out into the living room. I walked out and looked up only to meet with 4 pairs of eyes.

“Oh my bad,” I said, turning to go back to my room only to stop and turn right back around. “Ummmm…” I trailed off not sure what to say as I stared at 4 very large, very green, oddly human like turtles, all while in a bath towel that left most of my left hip exposed.

“Oh hi (y/n). I forgot to mention I had friends coming over.” April said walking into the room. “You might wanna put some clothes on though.”

“Yeah…” I said not able to look away from the very large turtle creatures sitting in the living room.

[taelme]

Little taste of heaven (pt 1/3)

genre: single parent taeyong!au, kindergarten teacher!y/n (fluff, angst, hurt/comfort elements?) 

pairing/s: Taeyong / Reader, side MarkHyuck 

word count: 23k (I'm so sorry I got carried away) 

tw: touching on topics of like abandonment esp in Taeyong’s previous relationship?? oh and they drink in this, slight age gap (like 5 years) 

a/n: edited version of Taeyong’s single parent fic! its a 2 part series and the first part is loosely based on na tae joo’s poem ‘the heart is drawn to you’! so feel free to check that out too~ and im currently working on part 2 so if u want a ‘refresher’ of sorts (also bc I added some stuff) feel free to read this while waiting read this on ao3 part 2, part 3

"I expect no less than these minimal requirements in your assignment or you'll be looking at a fail grade," Taeyong's voice was stern, his gaze more-so as he stared at the wide eyed faces of his students sitting in the lecture theatre, well, most of them with the exception of the two boys sat in the back row of the auditorium who enjoyed making his life...difficult.

“I think I've grown pretty accustomed to looking at my fail grades, as a matter of fact. He’s gotta try a little harder if he’s trying to scare me.” 

Donghyuck, the more outspoken of the two boys had shrugged, leaning back in his seat with a resigned sigh. His older friend Mark had giggled at the statement but dropped his smile immediately when Taeyong had glared at him, casting his gaze quickly onto his books, nudging Donghyuck urgently.

“Lee Donghyuck! Any problem with what I just said?” Taeyong leaned back against his desk at the front of the room, an expectant look on his face.

Mark shook his head quickly on behalf of his friend, trying to stifle his giggle as Donghyuck leaned forward, shaking his head at their professor with a sweet smile on his face.

“Not at all, Mr Lee,” he chirped, earning an eye roll from Taeyong, who dismissed the class promptly, eager to end his day.

Taeyong couldn’t stop looking at his watch when a group of students had bombarded him after his lecture, asking questions that Taeyong felt would never end. What bugged him the most was that a large majority of the questions were already covered during the lecture.

He glanced at the clock. 6:00pm.

She was going to be very annoyed at him. He was already almost half an hour late. Only in times like this did he wish his students were like Donghyuck and Mark, leaving as soon as they were dismissed.

“Is that all?” he’d asked the group of students, confused frowns on all their faces, but Taeyong knew he would have to hurry up if he didn’t want to get an earful for not being punctual… again.

“Uh...yeah, I guess,” one of the students spoke nervously, refusing to make eye contact with Taeyong all the while.

Taeyong took that as his queue to leave, massaging his temples with one hand as he slung his briefcase on his forearm, his blazer draped on top of it. His other hand held his almost empty cup of coffee with a death grip, walking briskly and doing his best to avoid being stopped by any of the other teachers as he headed in the direction of the college’s in-house preschool.

Upon reaching there, he spotted none other than his favourite little girl, Byul. Her baby blue dress (courtesy of Johnny) covering her legs as she sat at her desk playing with her toys. 

After Taeyong had rang the doorbell to the preschool, waving at her through your classroom window, you saw Byul straighten up in her seat.

“Finally,” she cried, practically running over to where you were, tugging on your pants. “Teacher Y/N! My papa’s here,” she bounced in place excitedly, her gaze never leaving the figure of the man standing outside the glass doors even as she rushed to keep her toys, waving at him with what anyone could only describe as stars in her eyes.  

Nodding at her, you ignored the soreness in your shoulders as you carried the toddler you were currently trying to soothe, walking with Byul over to the door of the centre.

Pressing the button to unlock the door and pushing it open with one hand, you’d withheld your shock at the sight of a very very good-looking (and young-looking) man dressed in formal wear, expression stoic until he’d seen Byul.

“Sorry i’m late, I was held back,” Taeyong pouted at his daughter, immediately blurting out his reason before she could scold him, squatting down and holding her still by the shoulders, empty coffee cup grasped between his other fingers as she continued to nag at him even while their photo was being taken to sign-out.

“You went to buy coffee before you came here!” she scolded him, her tone only managing to elicit those same ‘stars’ in the man’s gaze.

“The cup is empty, Byul, I bought it before my lesson just now,” he pleaded, “C’mon, do you want me to lose my job, huh? Then I can’t buy ice cream for you anymore,” he told her with a teasing lilt to his tone, and you were surprised to see Byul cease her nagging so quickly.

The girl was rather persistent, from what you heard in your time here, not one to back down when she’s questioned. Endless questions of ‘but why?’ or explaining her opinions to the teachers. Seeing her yield so quickly to what this man said was definitely a first for you.

Mental note to remember the tactic he used.

“Oh,” was all she could muster, looking at you and breaking out into a grin again, “okay, let’s go. Let’s go! Bye bye, Teacher Y/N!” she waved.

Taeyong cast a quick glance at you before nodding in greeting and letting Byul practically drag him out of the preschool, Byul yapping away about how she thought the way you were wearing your hair today was ‘like a princess!’, requesting that he did her hair like that for school the next day.

Still in a daze from the knowledge that Byul had a very handsome father, you hummed softly, patting the toddler you were holding in your arms soothingly on their back, staring at the direction Byul and her father had just walked off in.

“He really spoils her, doesn’t he?” your head whipped around in the direction of the sound, coming face-to-face with your co-teacher who had a knowing smirk on her face.

“Huh?” your eyes widened, unsure why you felt as though you were caught checking him out.

“Wait, was that really Byul’s father?” you asked gently, smoothing your hand over the toddler’s head soothingly, the little boy giggling at the little affectionate gesture.

She nodded eagerly, grabbing your hand and dragging you aside so the children wouldn’t hear you.

“What?” you laughed, “spit it out already.”

Your co-teacher feigned innocence, giving you a shrug, pursing her lips and just barely containing her excitement.

“Handsome, isn’t he?”

You gasped, reaching out a hand to swat at her arm. “He’s a parent!”

“Yeah, and your point is?” she shot back defensively, taking the child from your hands and dismissing your nod of thanks.

“It’s… inappropriate,” you glanced around, “isn’t it?”

She could only laugh, “My dear, the teacher’s here talk. And he’s a pretty popular topic.”

“He’s… he looks intimidating as he-h-e-c-k” you spelled out the last word, slowly getting unnerved by the way she was giggling.

“He’s a very lovely father… very single too—”

You let out a strangled sound of protest.

“No way, you’re not getting me involved in this,” you laughed, making as if to leave her, hearing her call out a ‘you won’t regret trying’ as you were walking away.

The next time you’d seen Byul’s father was when you’d found yourself in the crowded campus cafeteria during your lunch break, not being able to decide what to eat (or where to sit for that matter), seeing as almost all the tables were occupied by students and teachers.

You were still fairly new to your workplace, and most of the teachers were busy in the preschool trying to get their work done, which left you to navigate the intimidating cafeteria on your own. You almost felt like you were in college again.

After a painful period of trying to decide what to eat, there you stood, desperately trying to avoid the groups of students clamoring to get seats or enter the queues as you’d gripped your tray tightly. Looking around for any empty seats, your gaze finally landed on a familiar head of styled hair, recognizing the suit-clad man to be Byul’s father, wondering why his table was the only one that was empty.

Glancing at the three empty seats around him, he’d looked up from his food, eyes widening when he noticed you were having trouble finding somewhere to sit, contemplating whether it would be a good idea to invite you to sit with him but you seemed to have beat him to it. 

He couldn’t help the giggle that left him when he saw the way you winced as you just barely avoided bumping into one of the students and the giant canoe paddle sticking out of their backpack.

“Hey,” your attention was directed to Byul’s father, who looked at you curiously, “you’re Byul’s teacher, right?”

You hadn’t noticed the shocked stares you were receiving from the students seated at the tables near yours, wondering who you were and why Mr Lee would be deemed as good lunch company.

You nodded with a smile, gesturing to the empty seats around him, “Are these seats uh...?”

He shook his head, using a tissue to wipe his mouth, suddenly caring about looking presentable in front of you for some reason. 

“No, it’s fine. Please, have a seat, quick,” he gestured to the seat in front of him.

Gladly accepting the seat, you let out a nervous laugh, “Thank God, your table was empty. Would’ve been really awkward sharing with a stranger,” your eyebrows raised, grabbing your utensils and starting to eat.

Taeyong let out a small huff of laughter, knowing fully well why his table was empty but choosing not to dwell on that.

You sighed, “I was just hoping I could make it to a seat without spilling my food.”

Taeyong gave you a small close-lipped smile, training his gaze onto his food, “Would’ve been a shame to ruin such a nice dress.”

He had to stop himself from wincing when he saw the way your eyes had widened. Was that weird?

“I uh...never really got to know your name the other day, I’m Taeyong,” he changed the subject quickly, pursing his lips before taking another sip of his soup.

Swallowing your food quickly to speak, you smiled, “I’m Y/N.”

You looked even younger when you smiled, he thought. If Taeyong didn’t know better, he would’ve mistaken you to be a student here.

“Oh, you’re Teacher Y/N,” recognition was written in his features, “I think I've heard Byul talk about you quite a bit recently.” 

Meanwhile, the students at the table near you were staring at you as if you’d grown another head, finding it strange to see someone behaving so happily while talking to their professor that was notorious for being a massive pain in the ass.

“I’m guessing you’re new here? I mean, I know all of Byul’s teachers, but I’ve never really seen you before,” he raised an eyebrow in question, earning an nod from you, wincing as you swallowed your too-big mouthful of food.

“Yep, I just got transferred here, I would still say I’m pretty new, I’ve only been here for a few weeks at most,” you explained, shovelling another spoonful of food into your mouth.

Taeyong nodded thoughtfully, “How are you finding it? Does Byul give you any trouble?”

You laughed at how genuinely concerned he seemed, shaking your head.

“No, not at all! I mean, I take a younger age group but she’s a very smart girl. She really enjoys taking care of the younger kids, so I never have a problem when I have to bring my kids over to her class. I have to admit, I was really fascinated by how much obscure knowledge she has on animals,” you laughed, a part of you softening at the way Taeyong had such a proud fatherly smile on his face.

Leaning forward as if to divulge a secret, he held a hand up next to his mouth, his spoon tucked in his last few fingers, “Don’t tell her I told you this, but she watches a lot of animal planet in her free time.”

You scrunch your nose up in amusement, “I fi—”

“Mr Lee!” your head snapped around at the higher-than-average pitched voice that had called for Taeyong.

The said man lowered his head with a wince, internally cursing that his (least) favourite students would choose now to show up.

“Oh, you guys know Mr Lee too?” you smiled, intrigued by the two boys, the boy that had called Mr Lee flashing you a bright smile, strangely matching his light coloured hair and his outfit, a bright yellow shirt with a black denim jacket over it.

The boy next to him seemed a little on the shyer side, giving you a warm smile, his short black hair and glasses accentuating his welcoming demeanour.

Taeyong shot a look at Donghyuck as if daring him to sit at the table, which the said boy promptly ignored once you gestured a hand for them to take a seat. Donghyuck took the liberty to sit next to you, leaving Mark to awkwardly perch himself on the chair next to Taeyong.

“Yeah, he’s our teacher,” the black haired boy told you with a polite smile.

Your eyes widened, casting an intrigued look at Taeyong, who was busy glaring at Donghyuck before he looked at you with a small smile, nodding in affirmation.

“Didn’t know you taught here,” you hummed, turning to Donghyuck, somehow feeling as though he would be more willing to divulge secrets to you.

“What are your names, by the way?” you asked, both of them chiming in one-by-one with their respective names, “I’m Y/N.”

“That’s Miss Y/N, to you two,” Taeyong cut in, his tone more stern than you’ve heard before.

You almost laughed, you didn’t think you were that far in age from them.

“No, really it’s fine,” you murmured softly to Taeyong but he shook his head.

“Don’t let them take advantage of you,” he whispered.

“So, how do you know our teacher? Are you a student here too?” Mark asked, and you were about to reply when Taeyong cut in.

Teacher, huh.

“She’s a friend of mine, nothing you two should be too concerned about,” he shot them a pointed look as Mark nodded quickly, trying to stifle his smile whereas Donghyuck merely waved him off.

“Yeah, yeah, sure whatever. So, Professor, I’ll take it that Miss Y/N doesn’t know you’re basically a legend among the students?”

Taeyong raised an eyebrow, directing a look of confusion to Donghyuck, before realizing what the boy was talking about.

“Really? Wow, you must be a really good teacher, then,” you laughed, not knowing what the two boys were having some sort of telepathic conversation about.

“Don’t you two have a class you’re late for?” Taeyong glared at Mark while you were busy fishing in your bag for your tissues.

“Huh? No we do—” Donghyuck cut himself short when he saw Taeyong gesture with his thumb across his throat, Mark’s eyes widening.

Standing up quickly, Mark grabbed Donghyuck by the arm, “You know what? You’re right! We are totally late for our class, bye,” his words came out a mile a minute, the both of them leaving promptly after that.

You gave Taeyong a grin.

“They seem nice,” you nodded at Taeyong, earning a shake of the head from him.

“Yeah, until you have to teach them,” he laughed, a refreshing change from his usual broody expression, and you had to stop yourself from swooning—after all, he was a parent, and rule number one of being a teacher is ‘no swooning over parents!’

Glancing absently at your watch, your eyes widened.

“Oh shit—I mean, sorry, oh man, I didn’t realise so much time passed, I have to go,” you stood up, fumbling around for your bag and your phone, embarrassed by the amused look Taeyong was giving you.

Taeyong nodded, casting you a small smile, “See you later, Y/N,” he waved calmly before you left.

Maybe… company during lunch wasn’t so bad, even if it was just a little while, Taeyong figured.

You’d found yourself anticipating seeing Taeyong when he would come later on to pick Byul up, and conveniently, he’d done so just as you were about to leave the centre.

It was almost embarrassing how you couldn’t help the smile from your face when you heard your co-teacher shouting for Byul to get her bags because her father had arrived.

“You can do the honours,” your co-teacher winked at you, letting you usher Byul to the door with warmth spreading over your neck and face, the girl practically bouncing with excitement as she spotted her father.

“Hi,” you greeted, laughing when you heard Byul yell a loud ‘hello!’ to her father.

Taeyong’s jacket was draped over his arm, wobbling slightly when Byul had practically jumped onto his back while he was squatting, to get her shoes from her cubby hole.

“Did you have a good day today?” he asked, his voice taking a higher tone as he spoke to her.

She nodded vigorously at him, you had to remind yourself not to coo at how gentle and soft he was with his daughter.

“Yes, I did! I got to feed the fish today and I played with Janet and—” 

“Did you give teacher Y/N any trouble?” Byul looked at you with a suddenly shy smile, the tip of her tongue peeking out from her lips as she shook her head at her father, a smile appearing on Taeyongs face as he patted his daughter’s head gently.

“Make sure she gets some rest tonight, they had quite an active day today,” you smiled, receiving a nod from Taeyong.

“Will do,” he smiled up at you.

You picked up the ipad sitting on the small chair near the door, holding it up to take a picture of Taeyong and Byul, bidding them goodbye after doing so, Taeyong giving you a smile before letting Byul lead him out of the school.

You’d almost felt giddy. Byul definitely got her eyes from her father.

===

“Well you look like death,” Taeyong looked up from his phone as he paid for his morning cup of coffee, coming face to face with his long-time friend and colleague, Johnny, who took a sip from his iced coffee, a look of amusement on his face.

“Do I?” Taeyong yawned, thanking the vendor with a nod before taking his cup of coffee, urging Byul to come along with him.

“Good morning, Byul!” he greeted the small girl who was currently occupied with counting the amount of coins Taeyong received as change.

“Good morning, Uncle Johnny!” she chirped, swinging her interlocked hands with Taeyong as they walked in the direction of Byul’s preschool.

“Were you up late marking papers?” Johnny asked, earning a shake of the head from Taeyong.

“I got quite a bit of sleep last night,” Taeyong yawned, “don’t know why I’m even more tired than usual,” he shrugged, taking a sip of his coffee.

“Anyway, why are you here?” Taeyong glanced up at his friend with a confused look on his face, apparently still in his tired daze.

Johnny’s eyebrows furrowed, a scoff leaving his lips, “To get coffee, duh, what does it look like? Also, care to tell me more about Byul’s new teacher?” 

Johnny wiggled his eyebrows, making Taeyong’s head whip around to look at Byul before turning back to give Johnny a harsh glare.

“Not now, oh my God. And I’m not letting you meet her, it’s too dangerous.”

“What?” Johnny taunted, teasing smile on his face, “afraid I open my big mouth and expose all the exciting episodes of your college promiscuity?”

Taeyong shoved his friend away with a grunt.

Johnny whined, “C’mon, dude. You’re really not gonna tell me even after you left me hanging with those texts last night?”

Taeyong rolled his eyes, letting out a deep sigh, it was a wonder how Johnny was just as old as him but could pass off as one of his students.

“Meet me for lunch, I’ll tell you then,” Taeyong couldn’t help but feel almost anxious as he neared the in-house preschool, a part of him hoping he’d get to see you even if it was just for a minute.  

Johnny pumped his fist in the air triumphantly, bending down to wave goodbye to Byul, who giggled uncontrollably when Johnny pretended to pass out after she’d hugged him goodbye.

“See you later, bro,” he waved at Taeyong, leaving promptly after that. Taeyong let Byul run in first to take off her shoes, hoping he would see you walk out to do the temperature check. Maybe his loitering at the door made his intentions a little too obvious since he was approached by a teacher after a while.

“Temperature check’s all done… Anything else you need us to help with?”

Taeyong’s eyes widened, shaking his head firmly, making it a point to get out of there before he could embarrass himself further.

You on the other hand, were also disappointed upon showing up to work and realizing Byul had already been sent to the preschool way before you arrived, blaming it on your poor ability to wake up on time. However, you hadn’t let yourself get too dejected since, after all, Taeyong was a parent, and it wasn’t right for you to be crushing on him, especially not when you were teaching his daughter.

So you involved yourself in your work more, keeping yourself busy enough that you actually managed to forget about Taeyong for a while, and luck seemed to be on your side today when you’d been approached by your mentor teacher, who from the looks of it seemed as though she were about to leave work.

“Y/N, dear, do you mind doing me a favour?” her face was red as though she’d just run a mile before talking to you.

You straightened up from your squat on the floor, dusting off your dress before tilting your head at her, “Yeah sure, what is it?”

“We’re having this meeting later for the school to brief us on the upcoming renovations and which faculties it’ll affect, and the preschool is supposed to send a representative, which is supposed to be me, but something urgent came up at home, so is it alright if you could go in my place?” she asked, her tone and eyes pleading, making it even harder for you to refuse (not that you were going to anyway).

“Oh, are you sure, though? Are you sure you don’t want to ask a more experienced teacher?” you asked, hesitance evident in your tone.

However, your mentor teacher had dismissed your doubts quickly with a firm shake of her head. “Don’t worry, dear, you’ll be fine, you don’t have to ask or answer any questions. Plus, it’ll be good for you to experience these things while you’re getting acquainted with the school,” she gave you a reassuring pat on the shoulder, “but you might want to start heading to the auditorium now, the briefing will start in half an hour.”

Eyes widening, you nodded, letting your mentor teacher leave before informing your co-teacher that you would be attending the briefing, leaving once you had her acknowledgement. You figured you wouldn’t be too late, having arrived 10 minutes before the briefing was supposed to start, but what you didn’t realize was that all the other teachers and staff had arrived way earlier, leaving you with no choice but to sit at the seats nearer to the front.

Trying not to make your embarrassment too obvious, you walked down the stairs of the auditorium, sitting at an empty seat next to a man that looked like he belonged to the younger group of teachers, dressed in a plain white t-shirt and black jeans, the small shiny studs on his earlobe standing out to you.

The briefing started shortly after, with somebody you’d never seen before doing a role call to see if all representatives of the different faculties were present.

“Representative for the Department of Early Childhood?” you were shocked to see the boy next to you raise his hand calmly, as though he’d done this a thousand times already.

“Representative for the in-house preschool?” you raised your hand hesitantly, the boy next to you turning to you with a confused look on his face.

“Strange, I’ve never seen you before. Nice to meet you, I’m Johnny,” his confused expression faded quickly, replaced with a warm smile as he extended a hand for you to shake.

Didn’t know the people here still did handshakes, you thought, stretching out your hand to shake his anyway.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Y/N,” you told him, seeing his eyes widen, as if he recognized you from your name.

“Anything wrong?” you asked, seeing him let out a small giggle, shaking his head.

“As in like... Lee Byul’s teacher, Y/N?” you let out a nervous laugh at the specificity of his statement but nodding nonetheless.

“You know Byul?” You asked.

Johnny nodded confidently.

“Yeah, I’m her uncle,” your eyes widened, “well, not biologically, of course, but I’ve known her since she was born,” he smiled at you.

“Wow, you’re friends with her parents?” Johnny shot you a look of surprise, narrowing his eyes at you.

“Parent,” he corrected, “hey, aren’t teachers supposed to know about the child’s family background?”

Your eyes widened, “I’m new! And plus, I don’t teach Byul’s class, so i’m not quite sure,” you defended, ignoring the way Johnny seemed to be getting some amusement out of your panic.

“Okay, I’m guessing the other teachers haven’t told you yet, then.” Johnny knew the teachers loved to gossip, and especially about Taeyong.

You raised an eyebrow, tilting your head at him in confusion.

You noticed the briefing was starting to carry on, but you let yourself sink down in your seat more after Johnny had done so in order to continue your conversation, “told me what?” you whispered, earning a breathy laugh from Johnny.

“Uh...I guess, you could say...Byul’s mother hasn’t been in the picture for a long while now,” he made a face, making your eyes widen at the implication of that.

“Wait as in like… they’re… divorced?” you whispered, earning a shrug from Johnny.

“Something like that, all you have to know is that he is a hundred percent single,” Johnny smirked, nodding enthusiastically at you.

Your lips parted in shock, not knowing how to react to that other than to stare straight ahead, stressed beyond belief.

“I don’t know why you think that’s relevant information for me,” you scoffed, folding your arms over your chest, ignoring the way he was looking at you with a knowing gaze.

“Oh....no reason,” he giggled, “just thought you’d like to know,” he shrugged nonchalantly, making you let out a disgruntled sound.

The briefing ended after what seemed like ages, but you would say you were fairly entertained, making light conversation and joking with Johnny on the various presenters.

Once the briefing was over, you were about to leave when Johnny pulled you by the arm, holding his phone out to take a picture with the both of you in it, not bothering for you to be ready before he’d taken the photo, eliciting a gasp from you, watching him quickly typing away on his phone which only served to fuel your nervousness.

“Careful what you do with that photo, Johnny,” you glared at him, only earning a loud burst of laughter from him, the tall man clutching his stomach  with how hard he was laughing.

Finally straightening up, he let out a sigh of relief, “Cute,” he commented.

That reminded you, glancing at your watch, you saw that it was almost time for the parents to start picking the children up, surprised that the briefing had gone on for so long.

“See you when I see you, Johnny,” you shot him a look, seeing him nod patronisingly at you, waving you off with a smile.

Taeyong hadn’t seen the texts Johnny had sent him, only focused on getting to the preschool after his lessons ended, but strangely not seeing you when he’d arrived to pick Byul up from school, wondering if he had gotten there late or if you simply left early.

Not to be dramatic, but he’d almost thought the universe was working against him.

Driving past the drop-off point of the school, he’d been going to ask his daughter what she did in school when she suddenly yelled.

“Look, it’s teacher Y/N!” she squealed, pointing wildly at her teacher that was walking past the drop off point, a laptop and a thick stack of papers in their hands, phone and water bottle balanced dangerously on top of that as you glanced around, making sure there were no cars before you would start to walk across the little pedestrian crossing at the campus pick-up point.

Okay, I’ll take back what I said about the universe.

Stopping the car next to the pedestrian crossing (much to Byul’s delight), he rolled down the window.

“Miss Y/N!” he called, successfully getting your attention when your head had shot around to the direction of the noise, spotting him in the driver’s seat of the car, with little Byul buckled in the passenger seat of the car.

“Teacher Y/N! Where did you go, I didn’t see you just now,” Byul frowned, swinging her feet that were dangling from the car seat.

“Sorry, honey, I was busy doing work,” you pouted at her, turning your gaze back to Taeyong, reaching out your hand and letting Byul grab it, the girl swinging your hands excitedly.

“Hey, uh, where are you headed to? Do you need a ride?” Taeyong cleared his throat, looking at you expectantly.

You shook your head rapidly.

“Oh, no, no. It’s fine, it’s pretty far. I can just take a bus,” you pointed in the direction of the bus stop, seeing his eyebrows knit as he frowned.

“Where do you stay?” he asked, and you had to desperately suppress the thought of the information Johnny had told you less than a few hours ago about Taeyong’s relationship status.

Why was that important now? He was just offering you a ride home!

You told him the name of your neighbourhood, seeing Taeyong nod casually, “It’s fine, we can just give you a ride, it’s on the way, anyway,” he told you simply, pretending he didn’t see the look Byul was giving him, the four year old knowing for a fact that where you lived definitely was not ‘on the way’.

“Isn’t that where grandma lives?” Byul narrowed her eyes at her father, who she remembered always whined about how far it was, but this time Taeyong simply shrugged nonchalantly, hoping his too-smart four year old would kindly ignore that little detail this once.

"Oh, really? That's great, then," you smiled, Taeyong gesturing for you to get in the car, sliding into the backseat, setting your things on the car seat beside you. You noticed Taeyong's car was absolutely spotless, save for the few files he had shoved into the pockets behind the car seats, labelled in a chicken scrawl you couldn't read for the life of you.

"Daddy, what's that thing?" Byul would point every now and then at the different buildings or structures she would spot, to which Taeyong would tell her exactly what it is, only to have her counter what he said and tell him what she thinks the building should be used for.

Taeyong didn't seem to mind, though, seeing as Byul was happy and it let her use her imagination.

"So, uh, Y/N, long do you usually take to travel to school?" Taeyong asked, laughing when Byul had corrected him quickly.

"You have to call her teacher!" she whispered loudly at her father.

Taeyong made a face, "Oh, right sorry, teacher Y/N," he corrected himself with a small giggle, glancing at you through the rear-view mirror.

"Oh, it usually takes me about an hour?" 

Taeyong's eyes widened in surprise, "Wow, that's long. You don't have a car?"

You shook your head, "Unfortunately, no. Haven't had the time to apply for a license yet," you shrugged.

"Daddy, what's a license?"

"It's a little card that lets everybody know that I can drive this car," he explained, her head nodding slowly in understanding.

“Are you helping me keep mine?”

Taeyong let out a huff of laughter, “You don’t have a license yet, Byul. When you’re older you have to take a test first and learn how to drive the car.”

Byul let out a long drawn hum of understanding.

“Okay. But next time when I take the test and get the card, then will you help me keep it? I don’t want to lose it.”

Taeyong nodded, “Uh-huh.” 

He cast a glance at you through the rearview mirror as Byul had asked you if you had the ‘special card’ as well.  

"Sorry to interrupt your conversation but do I make a turn here?" Taeyong asked, seeing as turning in would mean he would have to enter the estate.

You observed your surroundings, realising you were somewhere in front of your apartment complex.

"Oh, no, no it's fine you can just drop me off outside the eatery there," you pointed at the eatery that had many different stalls selling an assortment of different things, the only one still open being a shop selling drinks and small buns along with another shop selling Korean food.

"Daddy!" Byul yelled suddenly.

"Yeah, baby?" Taeyong's expression read concern at her sudden outburst.

"I want to eat that!" she pointed, gesturing wildly in the direction of the casing full of different steamed buns.

"For dinner? But I thought you said you wanted to eat spaghetti?" he frowned.

Byul didn't seem to be having any of it, "No, I don't want spaghetti anymore, I want to eat that," you couldn't help but laugh at the way Byul was pouting, looking like the absolute epitome of a sad face emoticon.

"Actually, if you guys haven't had dinner yet, I was planning on just buying something from here and heading up to eat. You guys wanna just grab dinner with me here?" you suggested, adjusting your cardigan on your shoulder as you awaited their reply.

Taeyong couldn't deny that your suggestion didn't sound bad at all. And plus, with the way Byul was nodding as if her life mission was to become a bobblehead, settling a quick tantrum-less dinner was one of Taeyong’s top priorities at the moment.

Already driving the car into the open carpark beside the eatery, Taeyong nodded.

"That... honestly sounds great."

Finally settling down with Byul happily eating her steamed bun, Taeyong felt one worry lift from his shoulders.

"Daddy, can we watch tv when we go home?" Byul muffled over her cheeks full of food.

"Finish chewing your food before you speak, baby. But to answer your question, no, you gotta rest up tonight, you have a field trip tomorrow don't you?" Taeyong glanced at you for confirmation, earning a nod from you, an idea lighting up in your head.

"Actually, uh, about that, we're a bit short handed now, and we were sort of hoping we could get enough parent volunteers by tomorrow but that's not turning out as well as we planned," you huffed sheepishly, looking into your soup so you had an excuse not to look at Taeyong’s reaction.

Taeyong had also looked away shyly, knowing he'd received the email from the preschool looking for parent volunteers but figured it was an extra kind of thing.

Somehow feeling an unforeseen burst of motivation, as though he were getting pushed from behind and had no choice but to let his words spill from his mouth, he spoke up.

"I can help actually… if you need. I don't actually have lessons tomorrow," he lied, he knew that he had a morning lecture and at least two meetings tomorrow but hey, he could always skip, it wouldn't make a difference if he was there anyway.

Your eyes widened, "Really? That's great!"

You grinned, looking away in your panic when Taeyong returned your smile, his attentive gaze suddenly a little too intense for you.

"How's that sound Byul? Daddy'll come with you and your friends to the aquarium tomorrow!"

Byul, previously uninterested in the conversation, had raised both her hands, cheering as she looked at you.

"Thank you, Teacher Y/N!"

You shook your head, "You’re welcome, but thank your dad, honey." But Byul refused anyway, munching down the rest of her bun.

“How was work today?” Taeyong had asked you, earning a wrinkle of your nose in response.

Almost done with your food, you’d scooped and stirred your soup absently before deciding to let go of your spoon.

“It was fine, actually. I went for a briefing in the later part of the day and I think the guy I sat next to was your friend?”

Taeyong’s eyes widened, eyebrows raising as panic crept up on him. He didn’t have many friends in the faculty, only Johnny… and that was definitely not how he’d wanted your first meeting with him to go.

“Really? What’s his name?”

“Johnny,” you supplied, amused at the way his eyes had widened and he’d almost choked on his food, beating at his chest.

He didn’t know why he was so shocked, he should’ve seen it coming.

“Oh,” Taeyong reached over for his drink, Byul staring at her father in shock.

“Eat slower, daddy!” she scolded, frowning at him.

Nodding at her, he’d mustered a small huff of laughter, “Did he uh… say… anything?”

You thought back to what Johnny had told you about Byul’s mom, deciding that it wouldn’t be the best time to talk about it now.

“Nothing bad, don’t worry.”

Taeyong had scoffed (albeit a nervous one), “Worry? I’m not worried.”

You couldn’t help your smile.

“You looked very worried,” you teased, “I’m guessing you guys have been friends for a while?”

Taeyong gave you a nod, taking out a packet of tissues from his bag and leaning over to wipe Byul’s mouth, the girl taking another tissue from the packet to wipe her mouth a second time on her own.

“Since high school, actually.”

An impressed hum left you, “Wow, that is quite a while… that’s nice, that you guys sort of still work in the same place. You’re a teacher too, right?”

He nodded, “The Psychology department.”

Taeyong didn’t miss the way you pursed your lips, eyebrows raising as he couldn’t help but find himself feeling almost… infatuated.

“Not a fan of psychology?”

Your eyes widened, shaking your head quickly.

“No, no. Don’t get me wrong. The subject was really interesting, back when I had to learn it in college, but… I don’t remember it very fondly,” you admitted, “kind of had a shit—”

Your eyes widened, catching yourself in time before Byul had realised.

“A not-so-great professor,” you corrected, eliciting a laugh from Taeyong.

Byul, having seen her father laugh, had begun to erupt into giggles of her own.

Taeyong looked thoughtful for a moment, cheeks tinted slightly red from laughing, “I’m not so bad, I hope.”

You grinned, “I mean, you can’t be that bad if the students call you a ‘legend’.”

Taeyong sighed at that, though the smile lingered at his lips, nodding at you with a shrug.

“I guess you could say that.”

After dinner, Byul had started getting restless, so you took that as your cue to suggest heading back now. The three of you probably looked crazy, with you and Taeyong giggling about your conversations and Byul laughing along for the fun of it.

You were busy telling Taeyong a story about something a kid from your class had done, spelling out the words you didn’t want Byul to understand and losing your minds when you’d spelt the word incorrectly.

Letting a short silence fall between you (well, except Byul who was still giggling at her dad), Taeyong (and Byul) had offered to walk you to your apartment complex. You’d tried to refuse, but he’d insisted on helping you to carry your laptop and your stack of papers, Byul wanting to copy her dad and offering to help you carry your water bottle as well.

You let out a small sigh, “You guys better get some rest before tomorrow. Bringing this group of kids out is… not easy.”

Taeyong laughed, nodding, slowly handing you your things, almost reluctant to do so.

“I’ll… see you tomorrow, then?”

You nodded.

“Rest well, Y/N—”

“Teacher Y/N!” Byul reminded again, smacking her palm to her forehead with a laugh at her ‘silly’ father.

“Right,” Taeyong pressed his lips into a firm line, feeling as though Byul’s reminders were good for him as well. He couldn’t get his expectations too high just because of how comfortable he felt talking to you. It’d been too long for him to know whether what he was feeling now was normal or just in his head.

“Bye bye, Teacher Y/N!” Taeyong had let Byul get on his back before they’d walked off, the girl waving at you until you were out of sight.

After they’d gone home, Taeyong took out his phone that night once he was snuggled into bed, ready to settle his unread messages after Byul had gone to sleep, the unread messages from Johnny reminding him of what you’d said.

Johnny 5:27pm -look who I met at the briefing today;) -

Attached with the message was a selfie of johnny and you when you weren’t even looking at the camera.

9:54pm -what did you tell her!!! 🤯 –

Johnny’s reply came almost instantly:

Johnny 9:54pm -what makes you think i told her anything??-

Taeyong rolled his eyes, typing down a ‘I don’t expect anything less when it comes to you’.

Johnny 9:56pm -don’t worry, nothing working against u :)- 9:56pm -anyway she seems rly sincere, go for it bro u need it-

I’m too old for this.

Sighing, Taeyong flopped back down onto his bed, feeling as though he were in college again, anticipating tomorrow with a giddy kind of excitement in him that almost made him feel sick.

===

“Yo, yo, isn’t that Mr Lee?” Mark tapped Donghyuck’s arm, directing the boy’s attention to the man that was currently helping you give out the children’s water bottles to them, his smiling demeanour a big contrast to how they usually saw him in school.

Donghyuck gasped, “I haven’t handed my assignment in yet,” he winced, but his worried expression faded quickly, gasping again only this time more dramatically.

“He’s capable of being nice?” Donghyuck held a hand to his chest, bringing the other up to pretend to wipe away tears.

“Character development at its finest,” Mark giggled, meaning to turn away and continue checking with Donghyuck if there were any consent forms they were missing when they heard you call their names.

Taeyong’s gaze hardened as it landed on the two boys in question, looking at you as if to ask if this was a joke.

“Isn’t this a fun coincidence,” you laughed, “Donghyuck’s little sister is here so he brought Mark to volunteer with him,” you explained to Taeyong, resting one of your hands on Donghyuck’s shoulder, “Hey, I gotta go grab something, can I leave the three of you to handle the kids in the meantime? I’ll be really quick.”

The boys nodded sweetly at you, expressions going back to either annoyed or scared once you were out of earshot.

“What the hell are you two doing here?”

“... Volunteering?” Mark offered with a sheepish smile.

“Trust me, Professor. If I knew you were gonna be here I would’ve told my sister I’m not coming,” Donghyuck reasoned with a shrug.

Taeyong directed his glare at Donghyuck, “Lee Donghyuck if your assignment isn’t in my office by five thirty in the evening tomorrow it’s a fail grade, alright?”

Turning back to Mark, his expression remained stern.

“Mark, I’ll be out for meetings so can you make sure the assignments are filed and the stickers are on each of them by the deadline this week?” Mark nodded, his head already spinning at the thought of having to do all of that alone, something in him feeling a little better when Donghyuck leaned over to whisper a small, “I can help you.”

Once you’d returned with name tags for the volunteers, you’d ushered the kids onto the bus.

You took care of the headcount as they got onto the bus as Taeyong, Donghyuck and Mark helped them get seated. Your co-teacher had called in sick that day, so you were all the more thankful for the fact that Donghyuck and Mark were here.

“Byul-ie do you want daddy to sit with you?” Taeyong leaned down to ask his daughter as he helped her with her seatbelt, earning a firm shake of the head from her, her hand darting out to point at Mark.

“I want to sit with him!” Taeyong’s eyebrows raised in intrigue, shrugging.

Better him than Donghyuck, I guess.

“Me?” Mark’s eyes lit up, a finger pointing at himself.

Byul narrowed her eyes at him with a nod. Donghyuck was sitting with his little sister, leaving Taeyong to sit in the front seats.

“All in?” He asked as you got onto the bus, earning a nod from you, surprising you when he’d taken a seat at the front of the bus where you were about to sit.

“You’re... not sitting with Byul?” you asked, naturally taking your seat next to him, fastening your seatbelt as he replied.

Shaking his head, Taeyong sighed dramatically, “Little monkey doesn’t wanna sit with me,” you laughed, making a face.

“I mean, she seems pretty entertained with Mark,” you gestured to the pair who seemed to be in a very serious conversation, Byul fiddling with one of her pigtails, folding and pressing them against her head as she spoke.

Taeyong made a face, turning back to face the front of the bus.

You felt the need to start a conversation with Taeyong before you could let things get awkward.

“How’s work been recently?” you asked him, seeing him let out a tired sigh.

“The calm part of it’s coming to an end soon, that’s for sure. I’m absolutely packed with meetings and consults these few weeks, not to mention the fact that their tests are starting tomorrow, so marking is another headache because all the other professors are gonna take unreasonably long to benchmark.” Taeyong shook his head.

“You do look tired,” you murmured.

Taeyong groaned, leaning his head against his seat and closing his eyes,  “I’m so fu—” he’d almost jolted in his seat, eyes darting open and huffing.

“Tired. I’m so tired.”

You raised an eyebrow at him, seeing the smile grow on his lips, shaking his head at you.

“You’re dangerous, Y/N.”

You scoffed, “Me? You’re the one that almost dropped the f bomb in a bus full of children.”

“F bomb?” Taeyong giggled at your choice of words, “Yes, you. That only happened because you make me way too comfortable for my own good.”

Though it was a passing comment, you couldn’t help but read into his words, your silence making Taeyong realise what he said, shaking his head and quickly changing the subject.

“But work is fine, I guess. Nothing I haven’t experienced before,” he shrugged, glancing at you, “What about you? Have you been getting used to working here?”

“Yeah, actually. I’m really glad my teachers have been really welcoming, not to mention the extra help I’ve received from parents… like you,” you smiled.

Taeyong hoped his shyness wasn’t obvious.

“Actually, what made you decide to become a teacher?” he asked, making you laugh, this seemed to be the most common question you were asked since you joined the workforce.

“Didn’t expect myself to at first, but after considering all my different options and actually learning more about teaching children, something about it made me feel like I’d want to do it for as long as I’m working,” you shrugged, seeing Taeyong smile at your answer, nodding along.

“That’s really... nice,” he breathed, your cheery demeanour making Taeyong’s heart warm up  just a little bit more.

“What do you think they’re talking about?” Donghyuck leaned over to nudge Mark, gesturing in Taeyong and your direction.

“Teacher Y/N?” Byul interrupted, the two boys looking at her in intrigue.

Nodding at her, she was prompted to continue, “I had dinner with teacher Y/N yesterday because my daddy sent her home.” Mark frowned.

“Wait, your dad?” Mark asked, pointing at Taeyong, an expression of disbelief on his face.

This earned him a nod from Byul, “Yeah, over there.”

Mark’s eyes widened.

“Wait, the man sitting next to Teacher Y/N is your dad?”

Byul nodded, frowning in annoyance at Mark.

“Yeah, I already said that.”

“Dude. Do you know what this means?” Donghyuck leaned over to Mark to whisper.

“That Miss Y/N is a homewrecker?” he gasped, making Donghyuck roll his eyes.

“No, idiot. My bet is that Mr Lee is totally whipped! Think about it, he’s never not done anything other than work since we knew he existed, he would never go for this type of field trip thing willingly, unless there was something he could get out of it,” Donghyuck nodded his head in your direction.

Mark was still having trouble getting it, however. “To spend time with his daughter? Isn’t he married?”

Byul cut in at that, confidently replying Mark’s question, “I don’t have a mommy, you know,” she told him like it was something he should’ve known.

Donghyuck groaned at Mark’s lack of awareness, “God, you’re lucky you’re cute. He totally likes her!” Donghyuck waved his hands around frantically, feet practically stomping in an attempt to make a point, making Donghyuck’s little sister giggle.

Mark made an ‘o’ shape with his mouth in realization, “Oh....well.”

Donghyuck nodded, mischievous glint in his eyes, “Well, operation get Mr Lee l-a-i-d is a go!”

"You mean operation ‘stalk Mr Lee and come up with theories’ is a go?" Mark raised an eyebrow at his friend.

"Yeah, whatever, same thing!"

===

Once you were in the aquarium, you were suddenly thankful for the multitude of children around you, distracting you from the fact that you were basically surrounded by couples.

After a short tour of the first area, you’d entered a sort of dome area, where you were in something similar to a large tunnel, surrounded by paneled glass standing between you and the blue water, the sharks that swam right over your head putting you in a trance.

You let the children find their own places in the room to do their drawings of the fishes, leaving you to step closer to the tank to observe the fishes, with it being your first time going to the aquarium.

“Were you already aware that this was a prime date spot for couples?” you turned to face Taeyong, who had his hands shoved into his pockets, looking at the fishes with childlike admiration in his gaze.

You let out a small grunt, “Nope, but I’m really starting to see why,” you laughed.

Taeyong shrugged, a small sigh leaving him, “Maybe you can tell your boyfriend to take some notes.”

Just for a second, the tiniest of seconds, Taeyong wondered how it would feel to come to a place so relaxing with someone he loved. Whatever, he loved Byul with all his heart and she was here so… that counts, right?

You made a face, shaking your head quickly.

“I would if I actually had someone to tell,” you laughed.

You weren’t sure what to make of his expression, the way his eyes widened just for a moment, averting his gaze as a soft smile made its way onto his features.

“Oh. Can’t say I’m not happy to hear that,” he murmured, looking back at the children as if he hadn’t just said that.

Your eyes widened at his statement, hoping the blue light cast from the tank would aid in hiding the warmth you felt on your cheeks.

“I’m gonna… go uh… check on the kids,” you blurted quickly, leaving Taeyong grimacing and wondering if what he said was too much or if that was a good reaction he’d gotten from you.

Like he said, he was too old for this.

You figured it was unconscious, the way you’d wandered to where Byul was seated at the long bench meant for kids to do their colouring and drawing.

“What are you drawing?” you’d asked, trying to ignore the presence of her father just metres away talking to the children as well.

But then, it was Byul you were talking to, after all. She was probably the last person to avoid talking about her beloved father.

“Me and daddy next to the shark tank.”

You couldn’t help but sputter, an amused grin on your face, “Shark tank?”

She nodded, “Yeah, because I like sharks and daddy has a fish tank at home, so next time when I grow up i’m gonna have my own shark tank.”

Another child had spoken up, “No,” they whined, “shark tank is a tv show!”

“Okay, okay, a shark tank can be both a tv show and it can also mean a tank that has sharks inside,” you tried to calm the situation down.

Byul’s frown had only deepened, “Daddy! daddy come here!”

You almost winced, feeling a presence behind you not long after that, Taeyong’s gentle and doting tone making an appearance.

“Yes, Byul? What’s wrong?”

“A shark tank is not a tv show, right?”

“It is!” the boy from earlier had insisted.

Taeyong cast you a questioning look, eyebrows raising as his lips curved into a smile.

“Yes, baby, it’s also the name of a television show…”

Byul’s lips parted in shock as her classmate had rejoiced.

“You see? I told you it was real.”

You could almost laugh at the way Byul had grunted, “Whatever, float your boat.”

Taeyong and yourself couldn’t help the laughter from bubbling from your lips.

“Where did you learn that from, baby?”

Byul had simply smiled, a hint of shyness in the way her shoulders had risen, clasped hands pushing down on her lap.

“Uncle Johnny.”

Your giggles had merely doubled, enjoying the situation playing out before you, especially with the way Taeyong had calmed down from his laughter, a smile lingering on his features as he turned to look at you with his hands on his hips.

“So, uh… Teacher Y/N,” Taeyong fiddled with his collar of his dress shirt absently, “shall we head to the next stop now?”

You snapped out of your giddy daze almost immediately, glancing at the time on your phone before giving him a nod, turning to get Mark and Donghyuck’s attention before you’d started to instruct the children to pass their drawings to you, writing their names on their papers with a stray crayon you found on the table, ignoring the way Taeyong was quietly observing you all the while.

You’d tried to occupy yourself with the kids for the rest of the while but that was proving to be more difficult with how stressed you were that you’d kept making eye contact with Taeyong even if he’d happened to be at the other side of the room, or how what he’d said had stayed lingering in your head for the rest of the trip, you were just thankful that during the bus ride back from the aquarium he was so tired he’d fallen asleep, saving you from more blushing and heart palpitations. Though you figured it didn’t help that much, you were still nervous each time his head would turn a little too close to your shoulder.

Once you were back at the school, Taeyong and Byul had left first as the other children left with their parents as well, saying he wasn’t able to send you back because he was meeting a friend, so you’d gone home yourself that day.

Taeyong, on the other hand, wished he wasn’t meeting this friend, forgetting how much of a persistent being Johnny was.

When Johnny showed up at Taeyong’s house looking as though he’d raided the liquor store, Taeyong could already see tomorrow’s hangover awaiting him.

“So, how was your date with teacher Y/N?”

Taeyong rolled his eyes at the boy currently wiggling his eyebrows at him, closing the door softly behind Johnny as he brought the snacks to his coffee table.

“Byul is sleeping,” Taeyong reminded Johnny.

Johnny refrained from slamming the bottles onto the coffee table, placing them gently onto the table with a little dramatic exaggeration to his movements to appease Taeyong.

“Answer my question.”

“It wasn’t a date, it was a field trip,” Taeyong shot his friend a pointed look, earning a knowing look from Johnny.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever, potato, potato. So? What happened? Did you try flirting with her?” Johnny was always one to get straight to the point.

Taeyong recalled the comment about your boyfriend, recounting it to Johnny, whose smile only grew the more Taeyong spoke.

Johnny took a long sip from his beer, a satisfied sigh leaving him as he set his can down on the coffee table.

“Wow, dude. I would’ve thought you’d be a little more rusty considering you haven’t dated since like the stone age—”

“It’s only been four years,” Taeyong grunted, bringing his glass to his lips to take a tiny sip.

“Yeah, and in case you forgot what a year feels like, that’s a long ass time! My poor boy, you haven’t gotten any action since Byul was born,” Johnny shot Taeyong a sympathetic look, making him reach an arm out to swat at Johnny's head.

“I don’t need any action, Byul is a blessing to me, and you know it.” Johnny shrugged, knowing and having witnessed the emotional turmoil Taeyong went through when Byul’s mother left him.

“I know, yes, we all agree that Byul is a blessing, but don’t try to pretend you’re not attracted to Y/N,” Johnny sipped his drink smugly.

Taeyong huffed, bringing his can of beer up to his lips only to set it back down with a huff, “Yeah, whatever, I am. Happy?”

Johnny practically squealed.

“Very happy,” the taller boy leaned back into his seat on the sofa, “So, what’s your plan, big guy? How are you gonna ask her out?”

Taeyong shrugged, and for a moment, it hit Johnny that he was seeing a very different version of Taeyong, one he’d grown used to over the past four years.

The Taeyong he knew in college was someone that didn’t hesitate to go for the things he wanted. But ever since Byul entered his life, if anything, Taeyong’s first priority was always Byul. Everything he did was for her, every choice he made, it was always made with ‘would this be good for Byul?’ in mind.

He wasn’t as impulsive as before, surely. More cautious, perhaps. Less willing to take risks. Always anxious about the future. Barely letting himself enjoy the ‘now-ness’ of things. To Johnny, it made him seem so much older than he actually was.

“I don’t have much time these days, though,” Taeyong told him, the pleading look in his gaze intensifying as he sought advice from his best friend.

Johnny hummed thoughtfully, “Maybe you could like… I don’t know, ask her out for drinks or something? like after school or whatever. Think about it, you’re both adults, and she’s probably open to it if she hasn’t rejected you yet… yeah, do that. You’ll be fine.”

Taeyong let out an uncertain hum.

“Okay… I’m kind of nervous though.”

Johnny snickered, “Nervous? Why? Dude I know it’s been long since you were on a date but—”

“No, like,” Taeyong clucked his tongue, “I don’t know why either. Like, I’m really comfortable talking to her, and obviously I want to be honest with her if I’m gonna be straight about wanting to… you know, pursue a relationship with her and all but like… how am I supposed to just tell her about stuff like Byul’s mom and shit?” Taeyong leaned his head back, groaning.

Johnny dismissed Taeyong’s worries with a scoff, more confident about this than Taeyong was.

“Dude, just let it flow naturally, she may not react how you think she will.”

At Johnny’s words, Taeyong had let out a deep sigh, reaching over for his drink and taking a long sip, unable to get rid of his anxious thoughts.

Johnny knew this, looking at his friend with an indescribable emotion stirring in his heart.

“I know it’s been a while but… you miss it, don’t you?”

Taeyong pressed his lips into a firm line, daring himself to meet Johnny’s gaze as he brought his drink to his lips yet again, ignoring the sting of warmth in his eyes.

“Yeah,” Taeyong murmured softly, “I do.”

===

That simple statement from Johnny ended up lingering at the back of Taeyong’s head for the entirety of one of his toughest days at work.

Of course, Taeyong was thankful that it was the last day of his hell week, he hadn’t gotten the chance to see you the whole week with how early he’d been coming into work, and he was absolutely aching for a break.

Today, however, this break still seemed a little far away.

His schedule for the day had been stretched because he was still in a meeting, watching the clock tick by desperately and also waiting for Mark and Donghyuck to finish compiling the assignments to give to him, said boys sitting outside the staff room.

Located on the top floor of their faculty building, Donghyuck thought the little area outside the staff room was perfect for relaxing and lazing around. It seemed that exact mood had taken over him as he let his leg stretch out on the bench next to him, blindly pasting stickers on the front page of each assignment while he told Mark about his conspiracy theories on Mr Lee.

“I saw Y/N just now when I was picking my little sister up from school, she was having lunch at the same time as she was working but I saw her for a little while when she checked my sister out. She looked horrible, like, she was really stressed.” Donghyuck divulged.

Mark nodded with a little pout on his lips, silently removing the sticker on the file Donghyuck had just given him and placing it on the correct file.

“So does Mr Lee, actually, he’s been extra hard-ass lately, in case you haven’t noticed,” Donghyuck said matter-of-factly,”I can’t wait for them to get together so he can become less of a hard-ass,” he added.

“Does it work that way?” Mark let out an amused huff, sliding the file into the large binder Taeyong had given them, giggling at the way Donghyuck nodded profusely.

“Of course, it does! Ever heard of the ‘girlfriend effect’ before?” Donghyuck continued, fired up after seeing the skeptical look on Mark’s face, pressing down the sticker he was sticking particularly roughly.

“You see, Mark, it kind of works both ways but my theory is that when guys get girlfriends or boyfriends or whatever, they start being nicer, start dressing better, it’s like they get the rose coloured glasses thing,” Donghyuck shrugged.

“Rose coloured glasses thing,” Mark echoed, giggling at how cute he found Donghyuck when he would get in these moods.

The sound of the staff room doors being flung open had diverted their attention, seeing Taeyong walk out, and after spotting the both of them, walking over briskly.

Mark placed the last of the files into the binder, holding it out for Taeyong to take.

Yawning, Taeyong brought one hand to scratch at his forearm, pushing his sleeves further up his elbows, thanking the boys for helping.

“Are they all in?” he asked, shooting a pointed look at Donghyuck, who pointed at the name list defensively.

“I submitted it! Look, it says I did right here, don’t give me that look,” Donghyuck gasped, earning a tired nod from Taeyong, who left promptly after that.

===

Today would be a good day for drinks.

As Mark had observed, you really weren’t having the best of days, you were closing the centre today, and you were almost done with all the extra work you’d been asked to do.

Your co-teacher was having a training class today, leaving you to manage your class on your own, so with all that being said, you were just really really tired.

You understood that you were still fairly new, but you had a class of your own to take care of, the same amount of work assigned to a teacher with your position. But somehow, some of the other teachers had been calling you back and forth, asking you to do things that they should’ve been doing, reprimanding you for things just for the sake of it, expecting you to just drop and leave your class of eighteen kids while you were in the middle of a lesson just because they ‘needed you to watch their kids’.

You were desperate to get home, take a shower and have some drinks to wind down. Which was why when Taeyong’s message had come in, it was as if an angel had heard your inner ranting and decided to bless you for the evening.

Taeyong 7:27pm -wanna come over for drinks? Tryna clear whatever Johnny leftover from the other time he came over-

You sighed. In that moment, the thought of whether it would be appropriate had barely crossed your mind. It had been a while since you’d started to think of Taeyong more as a friend than as a parent.

You knew you should’ve given more thought to it, but the proposition sounded more than welcome to you right now, and before you knew it you were typing out a reply saying you would head to his house now.

You’d ended up in front of an apartment (that was definitely not ‘on the way’ to your apartment) with a bunny sticker placed near the doorknob that you figured was courtesy of Byul, knocking lightly on the door, getting a shock when you saw Taeyong open the door, however, looking unlike you’d ever seen him before.

Dressed in a baggy white sleeveless shirt and a pair of plaid lounge shorts with a pair of thin-rimmed glasses perched on the bridge of his nose, you tried not to stare at his damp hair, curlier than it was while styled, not to mention the multiple studs you saw on his ears.

Taeyong gave you a soft smile, welcoming you into his house with an unexpected hug, hoping the way you’d tensed up in shock wasn’t obvious.

“Have you had your dinner?” you shook your head but realized he couldn’t see you, mustering a small negative grunt.

Letting go of you with a small smile, you ignored the way he’d let go of you quickly, making to walk towards the fridge.

You took that as your cue to enter the living room, seating yourself in front of his sofa on the cushioned mat in his living room. Only once you were settled down did you notice that he was playing soft music in the background, assuming Byul must not be affected by it.

“I have some leftover grilled meat that Byul didn’t finish, we can just snack on that if you don’t mind. I was also planning on just making some instant noodles, do you want some?” you nodded gratefully.

“Yeah, that’d be great,” you tugged at your skirt when you sat on the floor, wanting nothing more than to spread your legs out but finding the material not the best to relax in, grabbing a pillow to cover your knees, finding different positions to sit in while Taeyong was busy cooking.

You’d even gone to the extent of almost removing your cardigan so you could cover yourself with it. You didn’t have much of a problem wearing this at school today since you were mostly walking about, but now that you were seated you realised it may not have been the best outfit choice.

Taeyong was done quicker than you’d expected, bringing a couple of cans of beer for the both of you.

“Tough day at work?” He laughed at your tired expression, receiving a groan in reply, before your hands flew up to your mouth.

“Sorry, Byul is sleeping, isn’t she?” you whispered.

Taeyong nodded in reply, a tiny giggle escaping his lips as he bent down to arrange the things on the coffee table.

“Might have to be a little quieter,” he told you.

“Are you comfortable?” Taeyong voiced out, quickly noticing the way you would keep one hand on the pillow, careful with your movements.

“Uh...I guess?” you whispered.

Taeyong shot you a skeptical look, amused at your behaviour, “I have some clothes you could change into if you want, wouldn’t want you to be uncomfortable when you’re supposed to be relaxing. You can just return them to me another day.” he offered, standing up to go get them before you could even reply, coming back out with a pair of soft shorts and one of his old college shirts, giving you time to go change.

“Thanks so much,” you whispered when you’d come back from the washroom, flopping back down onto the rug with a satisfied sigh, very appreciative of the way you could be comfortable without worrying about what you were wearing now.

“Was it hard finding this place?” he asked, trying to divert his thoughts away from how he felt seeing you wearing his clothes, and you shook your head in reply, letting him scoop some noodles into your bowl, something you noticed was a habit of his after seeing how he took care of Byul.

“Also, you know you don’t have to whisper. I know I said we had to be quiet but not that quiet,” he chuckled.

You ignored your feelings of embarrassment, “It’s fine, it was easier than finding mine anyway,” you joked, his expression changing to a more shocked one as if already anticipating what you would say next.

“You lied to me, by the way. Your place was definitely not ‘on the way’ to mine,” you laughed, “it was a completely opposite direction.”

Choosing to ignore the statement (though the shy smile on his face gave it away), Taeyong simply brought his drink to his lips, diverting the topic quickly.

“Oh, right, I was meaning to ask you this the other time but I didn’t get the chance to, how come you got posted here if you live so far away?”

You narrowed your eyes at him with a smile, choosing to give in this time.

“Actually, it’s cause I took a scholarship in college and now I have to serve a bond, so they sort of just posted me there so I didn’t think I had much of a choice,” you admitted, seeing him tilt his head at you, chewing his noodles.

“You know you can apply for a change in school, right?” he swallowed, picking up his can of beer to sip on it.

Your eyes widened, “I can?”

He nodded, “Yeah, I can show you how, I’ve helped some of my students do it before.”

“Well, you’re pretty keen on getting me posted somewhere else,” you laughed, finished with your food, leaning back against the seat of the sofa.

Taeyong looked like a deer in the headlights, “Oh, no! that’s not what I meant at all, I mean like, I don’t want you to leave or anything...”

You couldn’t help but laugh.

“It’s fine,” you cast him a glance, your smile growing at the way he’d let his smile grow, “I wasn’t planning on leaving, anyway.”

You almost swore you heard him say ‘good’, but for now, you chose not to read into it.

Shaking your head with a sigh, you took another sip of your beer, relishing in the mood of the place, the music serving to calm you down more.

Glancing around the house, you admired the little paintings hung up on the wall (including some of Byul’s artwork that were hanging by a single artistically positioned piece of blutack), to the little bookshelf below the window, children’s books and baskets of toys indicating that that was probably Byul’s stash of play things.

You couldn’t help but notice just how much of the living room was for Byul, traces of her everywhere. From the child-proofed everything to the warm atmosphere of the place, you had no words for the amount of care you could tell Taeyong put into making sure everything was perfect for her.

“Hope I didn’t interrupt any of your plans by inviting you over…” Taeyong cleared his throat softly, his voice lowering as he allowed himself to grow more relaxed, “just, suddenly felt like it.”

“No, not at all. This is nice, I honestly really appreciate it. You know, if you hadn’t asked me to drink I would’ve probably  just spent the night watching the news and drinking alone,” you confessed, an embarrassed laugh punctuating your sentence.

Taeyong smiled, dismissing your embarrassment with a shake of his head, “figured this season was taking a toll on the both of us…” he trailed off, his gaze darting between you and the grilled meat on the table, each second daring him to just spit it out already.

“It’s... nice to have somebody to be tired with for a change.”

The warmth that flooded your face and neck had only made you soften as you met his gaze. Sincere, starry eyes looking at you with an emotion you were almost hesitant to label.

You nodded, “I feel the same way.”

Taeyong could almost laugh at the pace with which his heart was beating, choosing to divert the topic before his heart could explode.

“You uh… you live alone?” he furrowed his eyebrows in question, unconsciously picking up a piece of meat to place it on your little dish.

You nodded, acknowledging the little gesture with a smile as you chewed on your food.

Swallowing your food quickly with a wince (not wanting to prolong the tense silence between the both of you), you pursed your lips.

“Yeah, my parents live pretty far from here, and since I graduated already and I just hit the legal age to apply for an apartment on my own they figured ‘why not’, you know?” You shrugged, noticing Taeyong freezing while in the midst of grabbing his beer.

“Wait....you just hit the legal age to apply for a solo apartment...” he said, his gaze flickering as if he was in the midst of calculating how old you were in his head.

You frowned, nodding, not sure why he seemed so shocked.

“Yeah, just turned 21 this year, what about it?” Your eyebrows raised in question, watching as Taeyong slowly reached over, one hand delicately grasping yours as the other had peeled the can of beer out of your hands, eliciting a small scoff of protest from you.

“Hey, why’d you take it away? I’m fine!” you defended, seeing him, eyes wide and still shocked, not knowing how to tell you that it was weird for him to imagine that he was your age 5 years ago.

“You’re like...basically a baby!” he gasped, shaking his head.

You scoffed, “You’re the one that invited me over for drinks, and I’ll have you know, it’s not my first time drinking,” you tilted your chin up in defiance.

“No, no, you don’t get it- okay, no, I’m sorry, i’m just a little shocked.”

Your stare prompted him to elaborate.

“Nah, like… ‘cause I was… your age when Byul was born.” Taeyong winced, as if afraid of how you would react.

Now it was your turn to be shocked.

“You’re twenty-six?”

Taeyong gave you an affirmative nod,finally daring himself to open his eyes, though he wasn’t expecting to see you nodding slowly, an impressed look on your face.

“Wow, I… I mean you look young but I didn’t know you were that young,” you admitted, reaching over and taking your beer back, taking a long sip of it.

“How old did you think I was?” Taeyong laughed, an incredulous look in his eyes.

You flushed again, shaking your head, “Not important-”

“Important! C’mon, it’s okay. I just wanna know,” he insisted, seeming to have gained his confidence back from the way he had leant back, hand supporting his weight as he smirked at you.

“Okay, I mean, I heard from the teachers that you had Byul when you were young but I thought you would’ve had to be like twenty-nine at least.”

Taeyong’s lips parted, leaning forward after taking another sip of his beer. Up close, the pink flush on his cheeks was much more obvious to you, and much more adorable.

Bringing your drink up to your lips in an attempt to ease your nerves, you looked on in anticipation for Taeyong to voice out just why he was looking at you like that.  

“You like older men?” he blurted, making you sputter over your drink.

“God, no,” you coughed, beating at your chest as you tried to calm down, “I mean like… it’s not like I talk to you because you’re old.”

“Why do you talk to me, then?”

Taeyong when he was tipsy was a lot more straightforward than you were used to. And you were already used to him being very straightforward.

“I… I talk to you because i’m comfortable around you… and- Taeyong are you really gonna make me explain?”

Deciding to spare you, Taeyong had laughed, the giddy smile on his face slowly turning to an expression that was slightly more serious, chewing at his lip as he frowned, straightening up in his seat as his hands fell limp on his lap.

“Y/N. I know that under normal circumstances it’s kind of weird and like… I guess inappropriate too, for a parent to be asking a teacher out for drinks,” Taeyong cast you a cautionary glance, “and if you’re uncomfortable with that I completely understand and… you know, yeah, I won’t do it again if you don’t want me to. But considering you’re here now I just… uh…”

“I just want to be kind of straightforward, you know, if we’re both gonna carry on with this-”

“Johnny told me, by the way,” you blurted, Taeyong raising his eyebrows in confusion, “that Byul’s mom isn’t like... in the picture.”

Taeyong made a face close to a grimace.

“Ahh, that. So that was what Johnny told you,” he stared at his outstretched legs, fiddling with the bottle cap on the little coffee table.

“Sorry, you don’t have to tell me anything more about it, if you’re not comfortable-“

“No, no, really, it’s fine,” he shook his head, “That’s actually what I wanted to tell you. Like, I feel like you sort of have a right to know before anything else can happen…”

Taeyong took in a sharp breath, more nervous than he was letting on as he fiddled with his fingers, “I just don’t really know how to start—”

“It’s fine, take your time,” your tone was gentle and reassuring, something Taeyong felt was good to hear.

He wasn't sure what he was expecting. Byul’s mother was certainly different from you, but in ways Taeyong didn’t know how to describe.

Maybe it was the warmth you exuded. At this point, he couldn’t be sure.

There were many times Taeyong recalled the memories he’d spent with Byul’s mother in college, how they could have fun, spend hours just wandering the city and doing things he supposed people in love did (even if they didn’t make sense half the time and were just excuses to spend more time together). They were inseparable, craving each other at every possible moment.

“I dated her for a pretty long time in college, we like...we thought we were in love?” he shrugged again, a huff of laughter leaving his lips, “we had so many plans to like...find jobs elsewhere and just like...you know, ‘run away together’,” he made air quotations around the last part.

You nodded slowly, “like… elope?”

Taeyong let out a small huff of laughter, nodding.

“Yeah, pretty much.”

Your nodding urged him to continue, trying not to distract him as you opened another bottle of whatever drink he had there.

“But then...as the story goes, you know, she got pregnant with Byul and you know, we had to change our entire plan, I got a job teaching at the school to make money for us and save up so we could get married, and she went along with it until well… Byul was born, and she just left.” Taeyong let out a shaky sigh.

You couldn’t help the thought that popped into your mind. How scared his girlfriend must have been to have made that choice. How shocked he must have been.

You frowned, unable to help yourself from looking sympathetic, making him shake his head at you, “you don’t have to feel sorry for me, Byul is the best thing that ever happened to me, going through all of that just… made me grow up, I guess,” he shrugged.

“So you never dated anyone after that?” you asked, your curiosity getting the better of you.

Taeyong shook his head. “No, what the heck,” he laughed, before realizing this was you he was talking to and not Johnny.

“I mean, I never felt like I wanted to,” he cleared his throat, glancing up at you to gauge your reaction, “but, you know, that was...in the past and all.”

You made a face, noticing that Taeyong’s cheeks were starting to tint pink from drinking, but you couldn’t help but find it absolutely adorable.

“Props to you, though, for making it through all of that,” you tilted your bottle in his direction, seeing him shoot you a tired smile.

Was this what people meant when they said boys when they’re tired are absolutely lethal? Because from the way he looked at you, you were sure it wasn’t the alcohol that was making your cheeks heat up.

You reached a hand over the table to try and grab one of the dried snacks Taeyong prepared, getting a shock when you suddenly felt him grab your wrist before you could knock over his can of beer, reacting pretty fast for someone who was already buzzed.

“Sorry, habit. Byul tends to be clumsy,” he let go of your hand quickly, giving you a sheepish smile.

“It’s fine,” you said quickly, grabbing the snacks and leaning back in your seat, putting some distance between the both of you before either of you could do anything stupid.

After a while more of talking and laughing for a solid 5 minutes when you almost woke Byul up when you opened a can of beer, you figured it was about time you started going home.

Perhaps it was your frequent glances at the time on your phone that let Taeyong know you were starting to grow tired.

He’d stared at you for a moment, forgetting for just a split second that you weren’t Johnny so it wouldn’t be alright for you to crash at his place.

“Uh… do you need a ride back?”

“No, no, it’s fine. You shouldn’t leave Byul alone here, anyway.”

Taeyong pressed his lips into a firm line, nodding. It was almost as if he forgot about that in his tipsy headspace.

“Right,” he pulled his phone out, swiping and typing quickly, “I called you a cab, I’ll send you the details.”

Your eyes widened, nodding.

You didn’t have to, you almost said, but settled for a polite ‘thanks’ instead.

“Thanks for inviting me over… Taeyong,” you murmured, watching awkwardly as he’d found a bag and helped you put your clothes inside neatly.

Walking you over to the door, he’d handed the bag to you, his other hand coming up to run through his now-dry hair before moving to fiddle with one of his earrings. It was as if he didn’t know what to do with himself, the way his hands would wander from his ears to his face to scratching at his neck to moving under his shirt.

“Text me when you’re home safe.”

A small sigh left your lips, giving him a small smile, “Goodnight.”

Returning your smile, Taeyong nodded.

“Goodnight,Y/N. See you around.”

===

“So, you took my suggestion?”

Looking up from the laminated paper you were cutting with a frown in the midst of your dark classroom, only the small torchlight from your phone there to aid you.

“Huh?” your frown deepened, trying to remember what suggestion she could possibly be referring to.

“The scissors?”

Your co-teacher grabbed a small chair from the table nearest to her, careful to avoid hitting the sleeping children as she set it down next to you, a small giggle leaving her.

“No, the professor,” she prompted, enjoying the way your eyes widened and your cutting halted, “saw you two talking this morning, looking very comfortable around each other.”

You shook your head, “We’re just friends.”

“I’m old enough to know that’s always how it starts,” she told you with a matter-of-fact tone, not believing you in the slightest, “be careful, though. Children talk… and soon enough, their parents will too.”

You sighed, “Is it such a bad thing for us to be friends?”

She seemed to share your sentiments, sighing deeply as well as she leant back in her chair, her head resting against the cupboard behind her.

“I think it’s where the relationship goes that’s the problem. I mean, I’d love nothing more than for a lovely relationship to come out of this, but I guess other people don’t think so… you know, conflict of interest and all.”

You grunted, “So, what do you think I should do, then?”

Her smile grew, “Before that. You haven’t kissed him yet, have you?”

You’d almost choked on your breath.

“I don’t know where you got that idea from.”

She had simply rolled her eyes at you, “Well, you like him, right?”

You hoped your co-teacher could see the scandalized tone in your expression as you scoffed, reaching over for your drink in your attempt to tame the heat in your chest.

“Of cou—” you stopped yourself quickly, taking another sip of your drink to extend your buffer time (it wasn’t that your drink tasted good. Maybe it would have, if it wasn’t as diluted by the ice as it was now), “just because I enjoy his company doesn’t mean I have to kiss him.”

She shot you a skeptical look, the smirk on her face making you cower.

“Very nice wording, huh? You enjoy his company?”

You waved her off, though you would have been lying if you said you didn’t have some worries about how your relationship with Taeyong could progress, the temptation to confide in her as a motherly figure getting the better of you.

“Don’t you think it might be bad for Byul? You know, if she starts getting confused about my… role in her life?”

The look that your co-teacher had given you was enough to answer your question.

Staring at you for a while, she’d let out a sigh after a dreadfully long silence, the rate at which you made the cut-outs for your lesson speeding up in your attempt to distract yourself.

“I can’t give you a cookie-cutter answer for that, since every child is different. And I know Byul is very vocal about her emotions and thoughts so I think it will be easy for you to tell if that happens but… I think this is something you have to talk about with… him. You know, being a mother isn’t easy-” as if sensing your discomfort in the way you’d averted your gaze, she’d stopped instantly.

“I’ll… I’ll just cross that bridge when it comes,” you told her, and yourself in fact.

“Do you need help cutting your materials?”

===

“What do you mean you didn’t kiss her?!” Johnny whined, stomping in frustration after Taeyong had filled him in on what happened at his house.

Taeyong wondered if Byul had learnt that from him as well.

Taeyong let out a deep sigh, “Means I didn’t kiss her, dumbass.”

Taeyong pressed the button for the lift, going up to his office to meet Donghyuck and Mark for their consultation session.

He knew he needed to mentally prepare himself too because it definitely wasn’t going to be a simple consultation judging from Mark’s text message.

Maybe he should implement office hours again just for Donghyuck.

“Why’d you give up such a good chance?” Johnny frowned, looking at Taeyong in pure exasperation.

“Too early,” Taeyong shrugged, “wanna be sure about how I feel, and I guess… how she feels, before I decided to do anything,” he explained.

Johnny scrunched his eyes shut in a pained expression, another whine leaving him.

“God, I miss impulsive Taeyong, when will he come out of hiding.”

Taeyong rolled his eyes. "Why are you so bent on it, anyway?"

Johnny looked offended, though he tried to maintain his ‘professional’ expression as the two walked into the lift, pressing the buttons to both his and Taeyong's levels, having to make their conversation more vague due to the students in the lift.

"Just looking out for you, dude."

Taeyong sighed, taking a sip out of his chocolate drink before leaning his head back against one of the elevator walls, shutting his eyes.

"I'm fully capable of looking out for myself," Taeyong muttered, earning a very cynical look from Johnny.

"You and I both know that's not true," he laughed, the automated voice announcing what level it was.

"Dammit, okay never mind. You better do something about it soon, or I’ll be forced to take this into my own hands." Johnny told Taeyong sternly, his expression changing immediately to a sweet smile as a few students greeting him as he left the elevator.

Reaching the ground level, Taeyong had began making his way towards his office (which he was very thankful for, by the way, seeing as he was one of the few professors here that had the luxury of one), spotted Mark and Donghyuck seated on the floor outside his office, Donghyuck busy playing whatever handheld game while Mark watched over his shoulder.

"Mr Lee's here," Mark nudged Donghyuck, who put his phone down reluctantly, making to stand up with a grunt.

Rummaging in his bag for his office keys, Taeyong fished it out quickly, unlocking the door and letting the two boys enter before him, shutting the door with a small thud.

Walking to his desk, the three of them had positioned themselves quickly, a testament to how often they arranged such consultation sessions.

"Do you have your questions ready? By the way, how’s your preparation for the essay submission going?" Taeyong asked.

Mark had simply sighed while Donghyuck groaned, “Don’t even get me started on that.”

"Alright,” Taeyong let out a small huff of laughter, “Take out your notes.”

Donghyuck pulled from his bag a very beaten looking notebook, flipping it open to a page where he'd (or more accurately Mark) scribbled notes from Taeyong's lessons.

"Which part do you not get?" Taeyong asked, inspecting the notes, inferring right off the bat that it was Mark’s notes and not Donghyuck.

"Everything," the light haired boy replied with a sickeningly sweet smile on his face.

Eyes widening, Taeyong’s eyebrows raised, lips pressed into a firm line before frowning, a pulsing ache in his forehead.

"I never thought it was possible but you just gave me a headache with one word." Taeyong groaned, setting his phone in his view on the table, taking out his pencil to circle and scribble on Donghyuck's notes, trying to explain to him the statistics content that Mark struggled to explain to Donghyuck.

"Donghyuck, it's not like you don't know how to do it. From what I’m seeing, you know what you’re supposed to be looking for, it’s just that your calculations are wrong." Taeyong's voice was stern,  something Johnny liked to call his 'teaching voice', but it tended to make students feel more stressed.

A small laugh left Taeyong, “Wait… why are they wrong? You’ve literally written the formula here!”

Donghyuck groaned, slumping down in his seat and resting his head on his arms on the table.

“My head hurts," he whined, his disappointment only escalating when he saw Taeyong fishing out a book of example questions, flipping to another page on Mark's book where there was an exercise he wanted Donghyuck to do without looking at Mark's answers.

"I can't," Donghyuck deadpanned, slumping down on the table, "this world is far too cruel for me," Mark snickered, patting Donghyuck on the back soothingly.

"Do the question, Donghyuck. The longer you—" Taeyong cut himself off when his phone had lit up, a notification reading that it was a text from you.

This had caught Mark’s attention as well (because Donghyuck was too busy moping). Taeyong, however, was quick to act, bringing his left hand forward to flip his phone over before the boys could think of prying.

"The longer you take to answer the questions, the longer it'll be till you get to leave, you know? Do you really wanna see my face for that long?"

Taeyong tapped his pen impatiently on the book to urge Donghyuck to get up, using the time the boys were distracted to take his phone and see what you had texted him.

y/n 6:33pm -hey, i rly need to get going, i’ve got dinner with my family, ure on level 8 right?-

Taeyong realized that you needed a reply quickly, but he couldn’t risk having his students seeing you returning clothes to him.

Lee Taeyong   6:34pm -nope i’m in my office, but i’m having a consultation right now. I’ll be done soon-

was all Taeyong managed to type out to you. You figured it wouldn’t be nice to interrupt his consultation but you figured it was your best shot since you needed to leave or you would be late for dinner.

“Are you done with the question?” Taeyong set his phone down, seeing Mark trying to direct him towards the answer option, having pity over the struggling boy.

“Don’t help him, Mark. You’re not helping him if you just give him the answer all the time,” Taeyong drawled, supporting his head with his elbow on the table, yet another sigh leaving him.

Taeyong almost swore when he saw a shadow at his door, his eyes widening in panic when he heard two soft knocks against the wood, the door opening slowly. Your head peeked in to scan the room when you’d spotted Taeyong, Mark and Donghyuck within the room.

Oblivious to the situation, you’d stepped in, “Sorry for the interruption, just need to pass your professor something really quick.”

Taeyong hid his face with the hand supporting his head when he saw you holding the dreaded bag of clothes in your hand, looking as though he wished the ground would swallow him whole. Though that didn’t last very long, not being able to help the look in his eyes as he thanked you, the look not going unnoticed by the two boys sitting in front of him.  

“Oh, hi Miss Y/N,” Mark greeted you with stars in his eyes, “it’s fine, please interrupt us,” he insisted, a small huff of laughter leaving him.

Donghyuck, who was too concentrated on solving the question, had looked up at Mark’s words, his mood instantly changing at your presence.

“Oh, hey, Miss Y/N,” he drawled, his eyes darting to the bag you were handing to Taeyong that he was desperately trying to hide from the boys.  

You tried your best to ignore the way Taeyong’s gaze had almost sent you reeling, something about it holding so much awe that you had to force yourself not to get carried away thinking about it.

“Alright, nice seeing you guys but I’ve got to rush off, bye!” You blurted, practically running out of his office.

Mark eyed the bag suspiciously, trying to see if he could sneak a peek at its contents.

“Is it your birthday?” Donghyuck asked, his mouth open in shock.

“Focus on the damn question, Donghyuck.” Taeyong glared at his student, not noticing how Donghyuck was in the midst of telling Mark telepathically to grab the bag the next time Taeyong was distracted.

The opportunity came soon after when Taeyong picked up his phone to reply to your message apologizing, since he didn’t want his students getting the wrong idea and spreading rumours.  

Mark reached under the table and grabbed the bag quicker than Taeyong could react, the boys emptying the contents of the bag onto the table before looking confused as ever as Taeyong was left standing up in a rush and grabbing at air, his fist clenching when he was met with nothing.

“Well that was anticlimactic.” Mark visibly deflated, earning a shake of the head from Donghyuck.

“I don’t get it, why is she giving you clothes?” Donghyuck asked, holding the bag out of Taeyong’s reach.

Taeyong grunted, sitting back down on his chair.

“Yo, wait, but this is a state college shirt, and it’s from like six years ago,” Mark gestured to the shirt, the logo of the university Taeyong went to staring up at him, mocking him.

“Maybe she went thrifting or something,” Mark shrugged.

“But still, who would want… this?”

Taeyong grabbed his shirt and shorts while the boys were busy speculating, folding it neatly and ignoring the boys’ incessant questions.

“These are yours, aren’t they? You went to this college.”

“But if she has them, means… she wore them?” Donghyuck’s eyes widened, practically lifting off his seat with how excited he was.

“But then, why would she be wearing your clothes?!” Mark gasped, both boys jolting with a start from Taeyong clearing his throat suddenly.

“You seem energetic now, should I give you more practice questions, then?” he directed his gaze at Donghyuck, who immediately ceased his questioning, going back to work on his question.

“Hard-ass,” Donghyuck huffed.

===

Your parents were always along the more… conservative side. It was always a dream of theirs for you to marry someone at most 2 years older than you, with a reputable job and no ‘bad history’; well-behaved, chaste, you know, didn’t have a four year old daughter.

Sure, it wasn’t like you and Taeyong were in a relationship, but it was the lingering ‘what if’ that had made your heart pound and your head ache. The constant nagging worry that your parents wouldn’t be welcoming of him and Byul, that they would think you were just going through a phase of life that you would get over in a few months. Their stupid child too swept up with infatuation to have any foresight, as they loved to tell you.

So when the topic of your love life had come up again during dinner, you’d almost felt your lungs give way.

It started with a harmless question, just a curious formality, you guessed, asking what they did today. But you should’ve known your mom better by now.

“Came from church,” she shrugged nonchalantly, using her knife to cut a carrot into tinier pieces (as if it wasn’t already tiny enough), “I saw Kun, you know he’s still working at that hospital.”

You swallowed your food with a wince, bringing your glass of wine to your lips as you took a sip, humming just to patronise her.

“Hard working boy,” your dad grunted, nodding in approval.

“Doesn’t Kun have a girlfriend?” you furrowed your eyebrows, a hopeful lilt to your tone.

“Nope,” your mother gave you a smile, “They broke up. She wasn’t serious, apparently.”

Your lips parted in shock, “And you know this… how?”

“I’ll have you know, Kun’s mother and I are quite close,” she told you matter-of-factly, eating another tiny cube of her carrot.

You were friends with Kun too, but you figured she didn’t know that.

“Oh, right,” you pressed your lips into a firm line.

“Met anybody nice at your new school, honey?” your dad asked, leaning forward to rest his elbows on the table, already done with his meal and nursing his 2nd glass of beer, earning a disapproving cluck of the tongue from your mom.

“The only people she’d come into contact with are the other teachers and the parents, and God knows there’s a severe absence in male preschool teachers.”

You didn’t know what came over you when you let the food sit in your mouth for a little too long, as if your jaw had grown tired of chewing, swallowing your food down without another thought.

“I see the college professors too.”

You tried not to show your offence at the way your mother had grimaced, “Look higher, honey.”

You scoffed, “What? ‘Higher’ as in ‘Kun’?”

Your mother nodded, the same nonchalance from before in her gaze, “Glad we’re on the same page.”

We’re really not, but sure. As if the universe had heard your cry for someone to save you from this dreadful conversation, you’d gotten a text from Taeyong.

Taeyong 7:47pm - what's this Byul’s talking about today about getting permission for teacher y/n to come over and play?-

Poorly hiding your smile, you’d typed your reply to him.

7:47pm -oh that! When i was bringing them outdoors the kids kept inviting each other to their houses when we walked past their houses in the neighbourhood, byul kept asking if i would go to her house, so i said she’d have to ask for permission first cause i can’t just go whenever i want to-

Taeyong’s reply came as a shock, almost making you choke on your breath.

Taeyong 7:47pm -well, i’m declaring now that you can-

Your fingers seemed to move without much thought, following your first thoughts.

7:48pm -come over to play with Byul?-

Taeyong 7:48pm -whenever you want to-  

“Who’s that texting you, honey?”

You only realised how giddy and stupid you must’ve looked when you’d met your father’s knowing gaze, earning a quick shake of the head from you (or as quick as you could recover from Taeyong’s words).

“No one, just a… just a friend.”

===

You were having one of those days, when the crying and laughter of the children in the childcare had started to merge together into white noise, the headache that was pounding at your skull making it almost impossible to concentrate as you rubbed the stomach of one of your kids who was having a stomachache (you figured your attention was what was helping her feel better).

“Y/N! Come here quick!”

You furrowed your eyebrows as you stood up, jogging over to where you’d assumed your co-teacher was crouched over one of the sleeping mats, the children having just woken up from their nap, your panic almost paralysing you when you saw that it was Byul who was crying, looking as though she were struggling to breathe.

“Oh my god, what happened?” You exclaimed, crouching down to grasp her shoulders gently, she seemed to be taking harsh breaths, crying and whimpering.

“I don’t know, I didn’t realise, the other kids told me she was crying but she looks like she can’t breathe.”

“Does she have asthma?” you asked, seeing the teacher shake her head.

“Not that we know of,” she chewed on her lower lip anxiously.

“We have to get her to the hospital,” your mentor teacher said, “that’s our nearest option,” she told you.

Nodding firmly, “I can bring her,” you said without much thought, standing up and walking a still-crying Byul away from the rest of the children outside, not bothering to grab anything other than your phone and wallet in your haste, fortunately hailing a cab quickly and heading to the nearest hospital.

In the cab, you tried to dial Taeyong as you were soothing Byul, not knowing that he was in an important meeting, currently presenting some sort of proposal to the heads of his department.

“Byul, honey, it’s okay, honey, I’m here. We’ll get you to the hospital soon, alright?” you tried to soothe her, the heat of her skin alarming you, your leg bouncing in anxiousness as you desperately hoped that Taeyong would pick up the phone call.

Upon reaching the hospital, you had Byul rushed to a room where the doctors had attached her to a ventilator, telling you to wait outside as you filled in her particulars.

“Are you her mother?” you were asked by a nurse, earning a shake of the head from you.

“I’m her teacher,” you spoke, “I’ve dialed her father but I haven’t been able to reach him,” you rushed through your words a mile a minute, the nurse giving you a warm smile, telling you to calm down.

You tried your best to let your shoulder’s relax, though your heart was beating harshly, and you tried to calm yourself down, straightening out your clothes and brushing your hair back where it was falling out of place.

“Alright, is it okay if I put you as her temporary guardian for now until her guardian arrives?” she told you slowly, earning a quick nod from you.

The nurse had simply smiled, gesturing a hand for you to follow her as she led you back into the room where Byul was, with the mask from the ventilator on her face, now looking a lot calmer than she was when you were on the way to the hospital. Though the way she looked had only made you want to cradle her in your arms and rid the shock from her bones.

Her hair was a mess, sticking to her forehead and cheeks from her sweat, her cheeks still tear-stained as she glanced anxiously around the room, making you feel compelled to reach out and wipe her tears threatening to spill as she took a laboured breath.

Looking at you with eyes that resembled her father’s, glistening with tears yet somehow managing to still look like stars, she asked, “Where’s my daddy?”

“Your daddy…” you began, glancing at your phone to see if Taeyong had seen your text messages.

Byul frowned, looking as though she were about to burst into tears again.

“He’s coming soon, baby, don’t worry.” you pat her head gently, feeling her reach out her hand that wasn’t holding the mask to grasp your arm tightly.

Enclosing your hand over hers, you rubbed it soothingly, feeling her relax slowly, starting to drift in and out of sleep after a while. You would’ve thought she was fighting her sleep to wait for her dad to arrive.

Taeyong had only gotten out of his meeting at close to eight o’clock, checking his phone to receive a shock at the numerous missed calls and texts he had from you and the preschool, a sinking feeling in his chest that made him want to puke, reminding him of how he’d felt when he realized Byul’s mother had left.

Taeyong read your text reading that you were in the hospital with Byul, along with the other updates you’d texted him on her condition, blindly getting into his car and driving to the hospital as quickly as he could, feeling as though he could cry with how wound up he was feeling, not wanting anything bad to happen to his daughter.

You saw him running into the reception area when you were getting a cup of water from the dispenser in the waiting room.

“Taeyong,” you called, something within you softening at the sight of his frantic gaze as he turned to you, going up to you and grasping your shoulders firmly.

“Where’s Byul?” his voice came out shaky, and you’d peeled his arms off your shoulders, squeezing his hands with a gentle reassurance as you led him to the room where she was.

“She’s doing okay now. Did you see what I texted you?”

Taeyong nodded, his lips parting and shutting, his tongue peeking out to wet his lips as he ran a hand through his hair, “So, the doctor’s saying she has asthma?”

You shook your head.

“Uh… not really. The doctor said this is a symptom, but he’s saying she only needs an inhaler if it happens again, but for now she’ll be okay, he said it’s really common among children her age, but he wants to keep her here because she checked in with a pretty high fever, so he wants to monitor her for a day,” you told him as you went over the information in your head to see if you missed anything out, seeing Taeyong wince in response, his hand going up to his hair in frustration.

“Shit, I wanna stay with her but I have training tomorrow,” he sighed, glancing at Byul who was asleep now, the ventilator still attached to her face.

He reached out an arm, grasping Byul’s hand gently and letting out a shaky sigh, blinking back his tears quickly.

He looked nothing short of a mess, his tie askew, top button of his shirt unbuttoned, his hair falling out of place, his bloodshot eyes and shaking hands. He hated it, frankly, seeing his daughter in such a vulnerable state yet knowing there was nothing he could do.

Sure, the doctors would tell him there was nothing to worry about, that it was normal for Byul to be experiencing this. But Taeyong couldn’t help it. In his eyes, his daughter was the most precious thing in the world, to be protected from things like this. The least he could do was to be with her, something he couldn’t even do at this point.

The whole situation had only made him feel helpless, a feeling he hadn’t felt in a long while that was making him feel like he was twenty-one again, waiting on his phone for a call from his girlfriend that would never come.

You shook your head in an attempt to dismiss his worries.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay, don’t worry. I can stay here with her,” you offered without thinking, all that was going through your head was that you wanted to help him, you wanted to get rid of the poor helpless worry in his features.

Taeyong stared at you, hesitant, though he knew you were his best option.

“Are you sure? I mean, I really don’t want to impose—”

You nodded reassuringly, “Yes, really, it’s fine. I don’t have to go to work tomorrow, I can stay with her ‘till you’re okay to pick her up.”

Taeyong sighed, his head shooting up when the doctor had walked into the room.

“Can we move this discussion outside?” he asked, you and Taeyong following him out obediently.

“So, I’m taking it you are her father uh… Lee Taeyong?” The doctor glanced at his papers, looking back at Taeyong for confirmation.

Taeyong nodded, his gaze darting between the room and the doctor, exuding worry.

“As I’ve told Miss Y/N here, I’d like to keep the child here for observation, she should be able to be discharged by tomorrow evening if there are no further complications,” he explained to Taeyong, the man nodding along as he spoke.

You’d gained approval from the doctor to stay with Byul the next day, tuning out the rest of the conversation because you could only focus on racking your brain for ways to get Taeyong to calm down and go home so he could rest before a full day of teacher training tomorrow.

Letting out a small sigh, his hand wiping his eyes roughly, “Right, uh, I’ll give you a ride home?”

“You sure?”

Taeyong nodded, “Yeah, I’m sure. Could use the company right now.”

Without another word, you let him lead you to his car, the worried and pensive look on his face never leaving throughout the journey.

“I can literally hear you worrying,” you huffed when he’d sighed for the umpteenth time that car ride, making him smile sheepishly at you.

“Sorry, I just… can’t help it when it comes to Byul,” he admitted, adjusting his grip on the steering wheel.

“... I know, it’s fine. Well, I would say there’s nothing more you can do at this point other than to be strong for her, Taeyong. Seeing you scared and worried is just going to make her feel the same way,” you advised, a small pout forming on your lips.

“Since I’ll be with her the whole day tomorrow, I’ll make sure to text you updates, alright? You just continue focusing on getting whatever you need to do, done,” you told him, recognizing your surroundings to be just entering your neighbourhood.

“I know, you’re right,” he sighed, adjusting his grip on the steering wheel as another sigh escaped him.

“Do you… wanna talk about it?”

Taeyong shrugged, slowing down as you stopped at a traffic light, the multitude of cars passing by in a whirl of colours and lights, something Byul would’ve enjoyed seeing if she were here, he thought.

“I don’t know, I just… feel like a shitty dad, I feel like it’s my fault it got to this point because I was so busy in that stupid meeting all while my daughter was going through such a hard time—”

“Taeyong,” you said firmly, making him look at you with sad eyes, his interlocked hands in his lap.

“None of that was your fault, you know?”

The look in his eyes had made your heart ache.

“You had an important meeting, you weren’t looking at your phone. I can understand that. All that matters is that you know now and you went there as soon as you saw your messages. That definitely does not make you a shitty dad,” you said, gaze firm and a certain finality in your tone.

He nodded at you, sighing yet again, the silence in his car only making Taeyong feel even more deeply.

“Thank you,” he murmured softly, “for helping Byul,” he added as an afterthought.

You shook your head, your smile exuding a certain gentleness that Taeyong didn’t know he needed to be on the receiving end of till now.

“Go home and get some rest, I’ll see you tomorrow when you come pick her up, alright?”

Strangely, as Taeyong looked at you, your words almost transported him to a mental reality where you said that not as an ambiguous presence in his life, but as his partner.

He recalled the night he was contemplating whether to put his daughter up for adoption, walking into the small makeshift nursery he’d made in his barely-furnished apartment. He remembered how peaceful his daughter’s sleeping face was in spite of the chaos that was unfolding in her family environment. This poor girl whose mother was nowhere to be found and whose father was desperately trying to see the hope he could cling to in the midst of all of this.

He was afraid, to say the least. Taeyong feared that they would tell him he wasn’t qualified to be her father, and wasn't fit to take care of her. His job wasn’t making tons of money, but it would have to do, right?

He wasn’t sure where his worries stemmed from, but he couldn’t wrap his head around what step to take. For crying out loud, his name couldn’t even be put down on her birth certificate as her father now that her mother had left before they had gotten anything certified.

Funnily enough, Taeyong’s mom was the opposite of him. She was calm, happy even, that Byul was sound asleep in the little cozy set-up she’d taken care to arrange.

“Don’t be so down, darling,” she told Taeyong.

A strongly religious woman since Taeyong could remember, she always seemed to have the right thing to say for every situation. This situation was no different, it seemed.

“Think about it,” she told him, “the wise men didn’t know where they were going, all they knew was that they had to follow that star to get to their messiah, that star was their hope,” she told him with a conviction Taeyong wished he had at that time.

“Have hope, darling, we’re all here to help you. This baby needs her father.”

Taeyong remembered looking at his daughter, the analogy his mother gave him seeming fairly appropriate.

She will be my hope, and no other name seemed appropriate to Taeyong other than to call her his star.

Looking at you now, you were giving him that kind of hope, something he didn’t realize he missed the feeling of until now. But it was different, almost. The hope that led him to a feeling of utter relief. The stars in Byul’s eyes reminded him of hope, but yours… yours was something different.

A good kind of different, he knew that, but he couldn’t quite place it yet.

He nodded, “Goodnight, Y/N,” he murmured, waving goodbye to you before driving off.

===

You’d woken up at an ungodly hour the next morning, making the long journey to the hospital Byul was at as soon as you could, having a (fortunately) uneventful day with Byul. You’d spent most of the day playing with her and reading her stories and letting her talk your ear off, none of which you minded in the least bit. Thankfully she had been approved by the doctor to be fit enough to be discharged by the evening, her fever having gone down by a little but her breathing was perfectly normal.

8:28pm - doctor just said byul can be discharged!! -

you’d texted Taeyong, receiving his reply not long after.

Taeyong 9:00pm - that's good to hear. just finished, on my way there now-

Once Taeyong had arrived, you were glad to see that he was less worried than before, but you noticed that he looked more tired than anything.

Byul gravitated to her father the moment she saw him, even as you walked, she refused to let go of him as he piggybacked her until she reached the car.

You didn’t realise how natural it had been for you to follow him and Byul, almost forgetting that you would have to rush if you wanted to catch the last bus back.

“Y/N,” his gentle call had snapped you from your groggy daze, “It’s pretty late, I should send you back.

Before you could even refuse, he’d continued, “It’s the least I can do, after all you’ve done for Byul.”

Getting into the car, Byul seemed to look a lot better, fiddling around with the controls in the car like an expert until you heard a familiar tune play.

“Michael Bublé?” you asked, an amused huff escaping your lips, earning an enthusiastic nod from her, followed by a chuckle from her father.

“Byul really likes this song, says it makes her feel like she’s in the ratatouille movie,” he explained, and you were impressed by how well she knew the lyrics to the song.

“What’s the song called, Byul?” you asked with a smile in anticipation, seeing her turn around to look at you with an equally as cheeky expression.

“La Vie en rose,” she pronounced in her best attempt at French, making you unconsciously reach your hand out to pinch her cheek gently, cooing at her cuteness.

“Perfect,” you nodded in approval, smoothing her hair down gently, oblivious to the way Taeyong had smiled at the way you elicited giggles from Byul.

Byul spent the car ride swaying to the song before whining when she spotted the house Taeyong was currently pulling up on the curb to stop at.

“Grandma’s house?!” she turned to Taeyong to glare at him, to which he’d simply raised both his hands up in defence.

“Grandma’s gonna be taking care of you until you’re fully better because daddy has work and I can’t take care of you, be a good girl, alright?” Taeyong handed her her backpack of clothes for a few days, the little girl huffing but putting her backpack on anyway.

"She's gonna tell me so many stories about so many people I can't remember again," she huffed, but eventually went out of the car and greeted her grandma.

You’d gotten out of the car with Taeyong, ready to usher Byul to the house but missing the way Taeyong’s mom was eyeing you excitedly, gesturing to Taeyong and giving him thumbs up.

You turned, greeting her with a smile.

“Hi, Mrs Lee, I’m Y/N.”

There was a glimpse of recognition that had flashed in her gaze, her smile widening.

“Oh, you’re Y/N! Nice to meet you. Forgive me, dear, I’ve been dying to meet you after all my son has told me about you.”

Before you could react, Taeyong had cleared his throat loudly, quickly spouting some gibberish about the rosebush in the garden in his attempt to distract you.

“Would you like to come in for tea, dear?” His mother asked, earning a glare from Taeyong.

“It’s late,” he intercepted firmly, “I should send her back. She’s had a long day.”

Shooting him a knowing smile, Taeyong’s mom had simply raised her hands in surrender, “Fine, fine,” she directed her gaze towards you, “next time, then.”

You nodded, “Yes, definitely, when things are less hectic.”

Ushering you back to the car quickly, one hand at your back, you’d gotten into the passenger seat, glancing out of the window to see Byul and her grandma waving at you.

“Listen to grandma, Byul,” Taeyong called out of the window, laughing at the patronising ‘yeah, yeah’ he’d received in response, driving off after bidding his mother goodbye.

As Byul’s favourite song continued to play softly throughout the rest of the ride to your house,  neither of you making any move to change the song, you couldn’t help but understand why she liked the song so much. But listening closely to the lyrics, you were wondering if Taeyong was feeling as in love as the song was making you feel.

Reaching your house shortly after, you were about to bid Taeyong goodbye when he’d surprised you with an offer to walk you to your door, using the excuse that it was really dark out.

“Next time, huh?” Taeyong had brought up suddenly, transporting you back to your short conversation with his mom.

You scrunch your nose in embarrassment, “Sorry, was I being too presumptuous?”

Taeyong had simply laughed, shaking his head, “Not at all. I’d love for you to meet her.”

You flushed, trying to regain your composure.

“She seems like she already knows a lot about me, though, any reason behind that?” you smirked, watching as it was his turn to be embarrassed, one of his hands coming up to press at his ears.

Taeyong shrugged, “Dunno,” he let his tongue peek out as he couldn’t help but smile, shoving his hands into his pockets as you walked, trying to get rid of the Johnny-like voice in his head that was begging him to reach out for your hand.

“How are you feeling?” you asked, getting into the lift with him, an awkward distance between the both of you that you pretended not to notice.

“A lot better, actually.”

You felt relieved, smiling at his response, fiddling with the thin straps of your backpack so you wouldn’t entertain the thought of holding his hand, watching the numbers on the little screen increase as the lift went up.

“I’m glad to hear that,” you purse your lips, taking your lip between your teeth and shifting your weight awkwardly, thankful for the ding of the elevator that indicated you were at your floor, walking to your apartment.

“Really, I know I keep saying this but really…  thank you so much,” he told you, sincerity written all over his tone.

You waved him off, shaking your head in dismissal as you stopped at the door to your apartment, keying in your passcode to unlock the door.

“It’s fine, Byul is my student anyway—”

“Not just for Byul....but for being there for me when I needed it too,” his voice echoed in the empty corridor along with the sound of your door opening.

Your eyes widened, turning to face Taeyong while you stood in your apartment, holding the door open with your foot.

You nodded, at a loss for words when he took a step forward, holding his leg out to hold the door since you were starting to let the door slip in your shock.

“Oh, that? I-It’s like, it’s nothing, I’m glad… that I could like… be there for you too,” you said, fumbling with your words like an idiot, faltering especially because of the way Taeyong was looking down at you now, a soft smirk grazing his features.

"Uh-huh," he murmured distractedly, his gaze shifting between your eyes and your lips once again.

Taeyong had to refrain from reaching a hand out to graze his thumb across your lower lip no matter how much he wanted him to.

Reaching his hands out in a pace that seemed to you as achingly slow, you were anticipating the feeling of his hands on you, confusion striking you when you felt him grab the straps of your backpack beside your waist, pulling them forward and connecting his lips with yours.

Overcoming your initial surprise, you’d let your eyes close and kissed him back, his hands leaving the straps of your bag and resting on your hips gently yet firmly.

You were surprised at how soft his lips were, but you were even more surprised at the way the kiss felt so natural, your hands unconsciously moving to grasp the fabric of his shirt at his waist.

The sound of your neighbour’s door opening abruptly making you pull away from him with a jump, whereas he simply calmly looked at your neighbour with a blank expression, nodding at him with his hands still on your hips.

Peeling them away quickly, you bowed your head, desperate to recover from your embarrassment, Taeyong shocking you when he’d let his hand gently cup your face, directing your gaze back to him, his gaze filled with what you could only describe as love as he leant forward to press a gentle kiss to your forehead, his hand smoothing down your hair.

Putting some distance between the both of you, Taeyong had simply smiled, unable to contain his happiness as he wished you goodnight calmly.

“Yeap, bye,” you blurted quickly, running into your apartment and shoving your door closed behind you.

He was going to be the death of you, for sure.

===

You hadn’t seen Taeyong the next school day, since Byul wasn’t at school, the only indication that he was in school being the cup of coffee he’d brought for you that morning that was waiting on your desk the moment you’d arrived, a small note attached to it saying it was from Taeyong (and your co-teacher waiting for you together with said coffee with a knowing smile on her face).

Taeyong had been stressing about the kiss for the whole weekend, the giddiness lingering but now it was coupled with his worries about overstepping his boundaries as Byul’s father, or whether it was too much for a first kiss, or too little for that matter.

Now, on a Tuesday evening, all he knew was that his lessons were over, and he wanted to talk to you.

Making his way out of the faculty building, his one focus being getting to the preschool, he spent the journey mentally rehearsing how he was going to ask if he could speak to you.

After rejecting about five possible options, he was in front of the glass doors of the preschool, oblivious to the two students sitting at the waiting area nearby facing the preschool.

“Oh my god, is that Mr Lee?” Donghyuck tapped Mark’s arm frantically, pointing at the man briskly walking towards the preschool, ringing the doorbell and tapping his shoe anxiously on the ground until a teacher finally came out.

“Isn’t it really late to be picking up his daughter?” Mark wondered, his question getting answered when you’d stepped outside the preschool, the strap of your heels undone looking as though you’d just woken up from a nap and rushed out.

“Hey,” Taeyong spoke, shoving his hands into the pockets of his pants.

Your lips parted, still in your half-awake daze, “Taeyong, you know Byul isn’t here righ—”

“I know. I’m here to talk to you.”

Your eyes widened when you realized what could have possibly wanted to talk to you about, making you shake your head quickly.

“We… not here. It’s too distracting,” you told him, Taeyong nodding in agreement, humming thoughtfully before his eyes lit up.

“I know the perfect place,” he told you, leading you as you walked to wherever he had in mind.

“We have to follow them,” Donghyuck said firmly.

Mark shot him an unsure look, finally tearing his gaze away from his phone.

“I don’t think we should be invading their privacy, Hyuck,” he winced, making the younger boy whine.

“Please, I just really want to—”

“No, Hyuck. They might be arguing or something, I don’t want to intrude on something so personal. Besides, it’s really none of our business.”

Donghyuck huffed, leaning his head onto Mark’s shoulder in defeat.

“Whatever.”

Taeyong led you to a quieter area of the school, somewhere you hadn’t been to before, something like a rooftop lounge area with many plants and a few wooden benches that were currently unoccupied.

You hadn’t been to this area of the school before, and you figured that may have been one of the reasons why it was just you and Taeyong here now.

You were glad that it was open, the evening light and breeze making the area seem a lot more comforting, thankful that Taeyong would have chosen this place to talk.

“D’you come here a lot?”

Taeyong shook his head, “Quite a bit, students don’t have access to this place.”

“Oh.”

A silence had fallen between the both of you once again, the tension slowly growing more suffocating as the seconds ticked by.  

Taking a seat on the chair, angling your body to face his, he’d let out a nervous breath.

“Right, uh… I think I’ll start by apologizing?”

You tilted your head at him, hoping your expression would mask the disappointment you felt, having initially thought he was here to confess like how it always played out in the movies, “... apologize for?”

“For uh…  you know, for the kiss. I know it was sudden and I wasn’t sure if you were comfortable with it or anything… but if you weren’t I just wanna apologize. I didn’t mean to come off as like imposing or anything,” he told you, looking as if to check if there were other people there even though you both knew no one was here other than you two.

“I hope I didn’t make things weird between us, I know you’re probably in a really difficult position now because you’re Byul’s teacher and all but I still kissed you! And I know it’s kind of… I don’t know, unprofessional and whatever but I did it anyway because I wasn’t thinking and I was just really overwhelmed by everything going on…”  

You looked at him, narrowing your eyes at him in amusement, not sure if this was much of an apology anymore. The look on his face had only made a wave of courage surge through you. You figured you’d might as well get what you were feeling off your chest so you could have this conversation honestly, without any regrets.

“But… well, what if I said it didn’t make me uncomfortable?” you asked, searching his face for a reaction.

He’d leant his head forward slightly, looking at you with both eyebrows raised as if he hadn’t heard you properly, “then I take everything I said back. I kissed you because I like you. A lot.”

Your mouth was sealed shut, a hint of a smile playing at your lips as your eyes widened, nodding slowly to digest the information.

“I’m… glad to hear that,” you murmured, seeing him look at you in disbelief.

“You are?”

You laughed, “Why do you talk like it was a bad kiss?”

Taeyong seemed to have let his words come out without much thought.

“Oh, no it wasn’t! Not at all, it was great.”

You couldn’t help your giggles from leaving you, Taeyong wincing at his prior statement, not being able to help his smile as well.

“Yeah… great enough to make me want to do it again,” you murmured, feeling yourself almost gravitating towards him, something in his gaze turning lighter as he smiled at you.

“Uh-huh?” he teased, his hands coming up to cup your face, his other hand moving to your neck, his thumb moving to caress your lower lip, the way his gaze was fixed on your lips making your head spin.

“My parents are gonna kill me,” you muttered when his lips were barely inches away from yours, your words making his gaze dart up to meet yours, confusion written in his frown.

“Why? What did you do? Why are they gonna kill you?” he asked, unconsciously shifting forward to you, his thumb now caressing your cheeks gently, his other hand running through your hair absently.

“Falling for one of my student’s parents? Their darling daughter would never,” you shook your head only slightly, Taeyong’s lips parting ever the slightest bit unconsciously from how he’d been staring at your lips.

He raised his eyebrows, leaning over so his lips were a small distance from your ear, “Should we stop, then? Does their darling daughter care?” he asked, his tone holding a challenging hint to it.

Pulling his face away so you could look at his eyes, how they seemed to hold the same ‘stars’ you’d seen many times before, though this time something about it seemed to have held you captive, feeling as though you’d lost the breath in your lungs in the best possible way.

Maybe this was what that La Vie en rose song meant about love, because you were starting to feel like that was true for how you felt towards Taeyong. Who knew Byul was such a genius in music selection?

You shook your head, “No, she doesn’t.”

Taeyong grinned, pulling you closer and connecting his lips with yours once again.

11:17pm - just to let you know you don’t need to take action anymore, i kissed her already.-

===

A few weeks later, you were scrambling around in your classroom. You’d spent the weekend together doing work and spending time with Taeyong and Byul, but in your rush to get to work that morning with the three of you having woken up late, you’d forgotten where you’d placed your lesson plans that were due for submission to your principal that morning.

Panicked, you called Taeyong, who had just arrived in his lecture hall, his students streaming in even though the lecture wasn’t set to start for another fifteen minutes.

“Hey, baby, what’s wrong?” Taeyong’s tone was concerned, wondering why you were calling him so early on in the day.

“Hey, did you see where I put my lesson plans? You know, the ones I was working on over the weekend? Have you seen them anywhere?” Taeyong frowned, opening his briefcase and looking through to see if it was somewhere within his documents, and sure enough, he’d found a plastic Frozen character designed file containing your lesson plans shoved within his stacks of papers.

Letting out a small huff of laughter, Taeyong nodded, fishing the file out from his briefcase.

“Well, you’re in luck, I just found it in my stuff,” he told you, setting it aside on his desk.

“Can you come pass them to me?” you asked in a pleading tone.

“I’m sorry, I can’t, my lecture’s starting soon. But I can pass it to you after that, is that too late?”

You groaned. “Yeah, I need to submit them before she arrives, which is… very soon. You know what? It’s okay, I can just go to where you are and get them, I think my co-teacher can cover for me for a short while,” you told him, sounding as though you were already on your way to the lecture hall.

“Alright, see you,” you heard Taeyong say, ending the call promptly after.

Once the clock had hit 8:00am sharp, Taeyong picked up the mic from his desk.  

“I’m starting the lecture now, so please have your notes and the assigned readings out,” he spoke, making his way around his desk and flashing his question on the projector screen.

“To begin with a recap of the last lecture, which one of you here can answer this question?” he asked, already anticipating the silence that would ensue after his question.

“No one? Okay, fine, let’s see who has no choice but to think today,” he shrugged, taking his name list out of his stack of papers, eyes scanning the list before he heard the auditorium doors open, the room full of students staring at you either in shock or curiosity.

Taeyong had almost laughed at the way you were trying to cover your face, your hair bouncing as you jogged to where he was.

Setting his mic onto the table without thinking of turning it off, too distracted by your presence, Taeyong had walked around the table to where you were. Letting him hand your file to your squatting self, too embarrassed to show up and disrupt a way too quiet lecture with a bunch of teenagers.

“My God, why is your class so quiet, you should really let them have more fun in here,” you winced, “Anyway, thank you so much, you’re a lifesaver,” you sighed, Donghyuck snickering at how the mic had picked up your voice, a small mutter of ‘yeah he should really let us have more fun’ leaving him.

“Thank me later, go hand them in, you coming over to my place tonight?” you nodded with a smile.

“See you later, babe.” You grinned, running out of the auditorium with your file in hand.

Taeyong turned back to the crowd of students, wondering why they all looked so surprised.

Shrugging, Taeyong went on with his lesson, picking up his mic and gesturing to the back of the hall with his free hand, “Lee Donghyuck, since you’re so busy laughing, answer my question.”

Johnny 9:10am -oh my god the kids told me what happened during ur lec congrats u idiot-