#oh and the belief that anyone can be good and nobody is born evil

[batfamiliar]

gabrielle is sam winchester-coded

[star-drip]

random lore update that makes no sense again and probably overlaps and contradicts everything!! yay!!!

anyway, my favorite thing about the cult in my paracosm is how closely it follows the "boiling frog" metaphor.

(ig i should put a tw for the mention of animal harm, also transphobia/death/harm mentions)

"The boiling frog is an apologue describing a frog being slowly boiled alive. The premise is that if a frog is put suddenly into boiling water, it will jump out, but if the frog is put in tepid water which is then brought to a boil slowly, it will not perceive the danger and will be cooked to death. The story is often used as a metaphor for the inability or unwillingness of people to react to or be aware of sinister threats that arise gradually rather than suddenly."

i've always loved learning about cults and groups of people who share some kind of unique practice/belief. real stories and fictional stories are both equally as interesting imo. my favorites have always been the ones that are morally wrong to us but so normal to the group. i also just like the "evil" ones lmao.

OH MY GOD I WANT TO REWATCH HEREDITARY!!! i feel like it is perfect inspo for how i kind of want to go with my paracosm's cult. (hard movie to watch though. mentally draining asf. the lore is amazing though)

if it wasn't horrendously obvious, the way my paracosm operates changes all the time, but the main theme of manipulation and cold comfort always stays the same. >:)

they worship demons, yes, but they also just believe a bunch of random shit for no real reason. like, how butterflies mean somebody is blessed and how moths can "tell them" to harm/possess/people. they often use this to make excuses to sacrifice people. they also drop their blood on random flowers as a gift to nature. like, okay, you do you. i guess. 🥰

so for some shit i already mentioned a long time ago (i think), emerson was given to her aunt, because she was born after luca. her mom only wanted one kid and not two. emerson is still fully aware of this shit with the cult and branded, but she's still not fully immersed into it like luca is (they are also severely transphobic to him so that's fun!)

fun fact! anyone seen as "possessed/part demon" is seen as "godly" until they step into the real world that has regular beliefs! then it is basically the purest form of evil! fun!

most people in the cult are "cursed" at a young age to be like this. it causes the curse to be branded on their skin. :3

this cult is basically the rival to like anyone's morals ever. you will be seen as the worst person ever by everybody if you are in this cult. everyone who is a part of this has to hide the branding at all times and show no signs of the "demon magic," whatever the hell that is.

BACK TO THE MANIPULATIVE SHIT

basically, they do what any cult does. they find vulnerable people and preach their beliefs to them, telling them how much it changed their lives for the better. they will even tell fake stories. they just want their group to grow more powerful.

what are their main beliefs? these demons are good guys and not horrible pieces of shit like everyone says! they make you soo connected to the spirits (yes there is a spirit world that people can go to. not everyone can access it) and totally not draining you of your soul! you just have the most powerful religion!! it's powers!!

honestly, half of the people that grew up around this stuff just assume it's normal until, one day, they realize it's not?? scary shit. i love that shit. i love the crisis moments.

the people that end up being sacrificed are often the ones that find out how bad it actually is too, and they tried to get help (wonderful. spectacular. nobody saw that coming).

what exactly is bad about it though besides killing people? 😟

(tw again) promotes harm of any kind. self harm, abuse, sacrifice, promoting false hope, feeds on weakness- tells them that this is all for a good cause, it is not. lmao.

i don't have it all figured out. i still don't have any real rules for the magic. it's just kinda there right now. 🥰

OH. do luca and emerson's friends know? NOT YET. (except for aiden because he was low key involved for a minute).

okay bye.

(oh, also, the spirit world rivals with the demonic part all the time. it's almost like kingdoms or parts of land or some shit.) byeee

[ihavenoearsbutiwilllisten]

Ward off great evil

'Fore I reach the front door

What am I in hell for?

Was I born to be tortured?

Creatures, medieval

Can you guide me?

("Yes, of course")

Fairy, goblin, unicorn

Point me the way with your horn

So you don't believe me

Well, I'll make it easy

I'll burst open the seams with you standing next to me

What look like raisins

Are plastered on my skin

Naturally occurring monster making condition

It's not the effect of poison ivy

I go hiking carefully

How come they want me on TV?

Am I really that much of a freak?

Why ever would I come out of hiding

When nobody's nice to me?

How could anyone think I'm lovely

When they retch at the sight of me?

I'd like to get groovy, to drink a mango smoothie

I'd like to watch a movie without everyone, and the sun

Telling me that I look dumb

Hate my buds, just because there's not enough room for us

They forced me to eat ice

Then I broke my teeth and cried

Jekyll, Hyde, Dragon, Slime

The only ones who are kind

Not my fault my body's spots resemble dried apricots

Beedo, Appadeebin

Wish I did, but I don't believe him

All I want is a quiet evening

And now you're telling me my dream's not one that's worth believing in?

Eedo, Appigo Appadeeben

Yeah, I'm ugly, but there is a reason

I came out of the oven too seasoned

Sometimes there's a casserole that just isn't worth eating

I imagine self-worth and inner peace

Tastes like artificial cherry

No, wait, maybe more like ice cream

Either way, I really could use some flavouring

Come one, everybody, come one, come all

The circus clown has dropped the ball

"How about we give her a face full of pie?"

For some reason, in return, you'd still expect a smile

And, whenever you get mad

I'm your walking punching bag

Can your conscience handle that?

It shouldn't be you, the one who's feeling bad

Not with all your intact arteries

I'd like to get groovy, to drink a mango smoothie

I'd like to watch a movie without

Everyone, and the sun telling me I'm not enough

Why would I enjoy this?

No, I'm not a masochist

With red gloves, all you touch

Certainly will get marked up

I, in fact, in light of this

Became your painting canvas

It's me against you and dad

Not afraid to punch him back

Happen to want to get hurt badly?

Then go ahead an try messing with me

I assure you I'll split you to atoms for free

Worse than that, I'll steal all the chocolate

Out your dear chocolate chip cookies

Purposely misplace you keys

Be the reason why you sneeze

When I say green you think of cheese

But in my mind, I'm picturing some fresh tangerines

You take pictures, I'll fake a smile through gritting teeth

You might surmise it's not the same

But you know that I won't play your game

Wasted all your day and let me get away with it

If you look like me, don't go out at night

To a man on edge, you could give a fright

And in self-defence, he'll take out a knife

Wouldn't want to cause a scene

Looking like it's time for me to fly away

Maybe I'll see you another day

Sike, you're probably going the other way

So give a smother to my brother when you see him, okay?

Luckily on my diet, I don't eat meat

For someone who looks like an animal, I'm rather picky!

Not a monster 'cause I don't hate babies

I don't skip cut-scenes

Eating my own kind is against my beliefs

You, though had no problem tearing life and limb from Ted and Jim, so

Made of stone your evil heart must be

Could be that your cup of love is filled with liquid savagery

O-o-oh, yippadie dee, oh, yippadie doh, doh

Went to the potluck with scones

You wont take any home, I know

But I suppose maybe I just want to do some baking

Take it from me, looks couldn't kill, no, but they can get you disowned

"We won't look at her"

Is that so?

Then my baked goods are no longer free for the taking

Thanks for pizza, I'll take a mango, blend it up real nice and slow

My dear friends, I have made it home

Rewarded with time alone

((WHY DID U SEND ME THE ENTIRE IF GRETEL))

[theggning]

I'd love to hear some of your thoughts on Curie, if you have any.

Sure thing! Apologies in advance if I get any of this wrong, I don't personally hang out much with Curie so I had to do a bit of brushing up on her.

Curie's key role in the meta is another facet of the theme of "what makes a person a person." She single-handedly displays the differences between robots and synths and through her we get a lot of what we know about the nature of synths and how it feels for her to become one.

But before Curie becomes a synth, she's another example of a rather unique robot. She starts off quite sophisticated and unusually intelligent-- though unlike Codsworth, her unique personality and knowledge were programmed into her, not developed over time. The Vault 81 scientists loaded into her all of the great academic works they had on hand (she lists Kant, Einstein, Born, Darwin, Curie, Faraday, Turing, and Braun) along with her initial capabilities as a medic and a doctor. Also unlike Codsworth, she hasn't become accustomed to the wasteland, nor traumatized by it-- nor does she even have the capability. Curie has spent the past 210 years trapped in the secret section of Vault 81, and since the deaths of the scientists, she has been completely isolated from human contact. Thus, she is incredibly booksmart, while being... quite unprepared for the horrors that greet her in the wasteland outside.

My favorite description I've ever seen of Curie is "a doctor coming to the slow, horrified realization that nobody washes their hands." She has a picture of the world in her mind that's dictated by science, math, logic, reason, and ethics-- and as a still, quite basic robot, she's baffled when reality doesn't match up to this. Just like Sole, she emerges in a world that resembles what she knows and yet is completely strange and oftentimes very hostile-- she's just doing this with the capabilities of a robot reconciling observations against what was literally programmed into her.

I think there's a fandom tendency to infantilize Curie to some degree, or to play up her naivety to the point of farce. But Curie isn't clueless, or stupid. In addition to her scientific knowledge, she has a very firm set of morals and ethics and will speak up or push back if she feels the Sole Survivor is behaving poorly. She is one of the "good" companions who approves of kind acts, and she is a pacifist, if she can help it. She's philanthropic, but also more scientifically-minded than the other "good" companions-- notably, her approvals all lean in favor of helping scientists and supporting the advancement of knowledge. She supports the Minutemen and the Railroad-- but also the Brotherhood of Steel, since their knowledge and preservation of technology strike her as more important than their feelings on synths. She is pro-synth and disapproves of the enslavement or mistreatment of synths, but when the Institute is destroyed, she chiefly expresses sorrow for how much knowledge was lost. She disapproves of Dr. Chambers' cruelty, but dislikes it if you kill her-- cutting short any contributions to science she could have made. Curie is kind, but she's also ambitious, logical, and values "big picture" scientific advancement.

Really, if there was any companion besides X6-88 who could fit an Institute mindset, it's Curie. She has more compassion for people than anyone in the Institute does, but it's interesting to compare her logical, pragmatic beliefs to the faction that has taken them and twisted them to evil purposes. (Am I saying that Curie would make a terrifying villain if she were to slip too far down that road of logic and pragmatism? Maybe I am...)

This pragmatism extends to her desires to become a synth. Curie comes up with the idea mainly because she feels her scientific ambitions cannot be reached unless she feels inspiration, which she's not capable of as a robot. She insists that her new body will allow her to do good for humanity, and to her, this justifies any ethical problems around transferring her into the braindead G5-19 (Curie doesn't understand Glory's hesitation to let her friend's body be used in this way-- because as a robot, she's literally incapable of empathizing with her.) It's only after Curie opens her eyes in her new body that we understand what a stark difference it is, and how many new and frightening things she's feeling for the first time-- emotions, wayward thoughts, urges to breathe and eat and sleep-- hell, fear is a new concept for her. Her robotic brain worked in numbers and data and programming, and all of a sudden she's capable of all these other things that could never be replicated by data. Curie's transition clearly illustrates the difference between a robotic brain and a synth brain- a human brain, for all intents and purposes.

(I've always thought it takes a special kind of dingus to travel with and befriend and even romance Curie and yet still proclaim that synths are "just machines." You'll see PLENTY of them, but boy oh boy, that's quite a load of cognitive dissonance going on there. Or creep, depending on the argument.)

Which leads me to one of the hot-button topics when it comes to Curie: the romance. While Curie's romance does fall under the umbrella of the "Born Sexy Yesterday" trope, I think this aspect of it is a bit overblown. Like I said, there's a real tendency in fandom to infantilize Curie, or make her seem more clueless pwecious uwu cinnamon roll than she really is. But the difference between Curie and most of your standard issue Born Sexy Yesterday waifs is that Curie isn't helpless, nor childlike, nor incapable of standing up for herself. She's both extremely intelligent and fully confident in her morals and beliefs. She asks for the Sole Survivor's support with her emotional transition because she already trusts them as her friend, not because she has no one else or can't handle it on her own. From early on in her affinity convos, Curie expresses attraction to the Sole Survivor, and approaches learning about these new feelings with the same enthusiasm and curiosity that she does everything else. It's her attraction, not begun by the Sole Survivor manipulating her or tricking her into it. I feel like a lot of surface-level descriptions of the romance disregard Curie's agency, as though she's a bubble-headed innocent who's completely vulnerable and clueless about the mere prospects of attraction, romance, or sex.

Now, that said... did Curie have to transfer into the body of a conventionally attractive woman for her plot to work? No. Does her romance scratch the itch for people who like Born Sexy Yesterday? Yeah, probably. Is she designed to be Prime Waifu Material*? Undoubtedly. Is it my cup of tea? Nah. But different strokes for different folks**. I don't think Curie's romance is inherently bad or anyone should feel bad for enjoying it, or her as a character. She's extremely intelligent, cute, and wholesome, and if that's your type, then embrace her!

* Like oh my god, this is video games, Curie's entire character and romance could have been done so much worse.

** And seriously, I'm not about to judge someone for falling in love with the cute waifu-bait romance when I'm over here lusting over Strong Flawed Sad Tragic Himbo Whom I Can Save With My Love.

It ain't like they didn't cater to my tastes, too.

[fcarher]

A DEEP-DIVE INTO YUNA’S HISTORY WITH NEGATIVE EMOTIONS

yuna has a hard time with positive emotions; they do not feel as natural as negative ones, that’s why you’ll often see her not responding to positivity, apart from compliments regarding her looks. she knows what she is & what she isn’t & is set on these beliefs, thus sees statements like “you’re so nice.”, “thank you for helping me. “ & more as blatant mockery. she can’t seem to grasp why SUDDENLY people were nice to her; she sees herself as a strong & capable fighter, not a friend, lover or wife. she sees herself as a calculated woman; not one that would get out of their way to help somebody. but why is that so ? what brought her to think that way ? there are a lot of instances that have solidified these beliefs but significant events, the origins of such thinking, have been FOUR in total. ( this is VERY long but i’d really love it for you guys to just skim through everything, at last. under the read more, you’ll find four stories/events within yuna’s past.  )

HER FAMILY 

i think i have already established the fact that yuna’s father was far from a good parent & while her biological mother never had a real moment within her life, there are other people, seen as family, who have made her life even harder. for once, she had an elder biological sister who was born 4 years before her. her name was myra & she was the opposite of her sister; she was very polite towards her elders, cooked well & cleaned the house, could sew any garment one desired; a perfect wife through the eyes of the villagers; a desired woman. & yet, it was always yuna who was talked about; even if it was negative attention; she got it. myra got nothing. & of course, there was more that let jealousy poison her completely; yunaeisha’s looks. she was beautiful, so beautiful that everyone, even if they didn’t like her & wanted her gone, still admired her for her appearance. 

next to her; she felt overshadowed. yuna’s eyes were a beautiful warm brown whilst hers were dark, almost black; her hair was unruly, dry & an ashen brown whilst yuna’s was black, yet sparkled within the sun as if each strand was infused with diamonds. it was always yuna who would take the spotlight; be it people commenting on her long silken hair or how bad she behaved; no one had time to spare for myra. & over the years, as both of them got older, myra let her frustration become aggression towards her sister, who was seemingly indifferent to everything; she cut her hair, stabbed her skin, so it would become scarred & not as beautiful anymore; punched her face, so it would become deformed; ANYTHING would she do, so that her sister, for once, would not be the sister everyone talked about it. but nothing worked; everything healed perfectly & yuna didn’t seem to care. & when myra noticed; she became even angrier; more aggressive. she talked her down; everytime yuna would smile or laugh, even for one second; she would belittle her, mock her laugh & expression, make her feel little. & it seemed like those WORDS hurt her more than her punches could ever. & thus, she put everything down what yuna liked; 

she got a new dress ? well, she looked like a clown in it. & oh, i heard some boys talking about how much weight you gained, it sure seems like that. her favorite color was pink ? you look ridiculous. you’re not even a real girl, are you ? i mean, i saw you; you were a faceless monster. she wanted to learn more about her mother ? weren’t you the reason why she killed herself ? i wouldn’t question it if you were to cause even more suicides. nobody can be happy around you. 

& while, yuna was a demon; not quite human; she was still a child, impressionable with toxicity around her. & she took everything to heart because somewhere, deep within her; there was love for myra. & that’s why she thought; yes, she was right. i am just that. 

HER FIRST COMRADES

yuna doesn’t talk about this, these moments haunt her the most; sometime after leaving russia, she found herself in the middle of germany; a small village build around a river. it seemed nice, the villagers were friendly; seemingly, the world “evil” had been completely wiped out of their dictionary. well, so it seemed. the female was taken in by a nice lady, the keeper of a hotel for travelers & of course, yuna had never thought that she would stay there for more than a week or so. & soon, more travelers came to visit, all seemingly ignoring yuna while she was preparing herself to leave; she came to this village basically on bare foot with nothing else to call hers; there was no way she could have survived like this for far too long, she needed humans; their life; their energy.  & there, she would meet a small group of ex-mercenaries; frank braun, ludwig aue & augusta aue. they were quite known here as it seemed; everyone loved them, gave them free food, free alcohol. yuna wanted to take part in this,too, because she knew, she was capable enough. 

& as days passed; the four of them would become great friends. frank braun was a skilled archer; he could seemingly kill everything, no matter how fast they were. he had been in love with a girl called anneliese, a lady in waiting for a king in the north & his childhood friend; it was bittersweet because he knew, they could never be happy together; she was tied to the palace, he was tied to the streets. ludwig & augusta were siblings, orphans, whose parents have died when their hometown was set on fire; nobody really knew who the arsonist was, though, there had been many theories; an exiled nobleman, a widow angry at the village, a dragon or even a demon.  both, brother & sister, had been trained in swordsmanship by a man, an exiled knight, while staying at the orphanage. even though, a woman was not allowed to wield a sword against another man, the knight, eren bräuer, did not care & trained them equally. yuna showcased her own abilities, though, withheld the information about her supernatural powers from them; she loved them dearly, thought of them as family & didn’t want to lose them. the reason why she thought that she could potentially lose them for not being human ? they despised everything supernatural. all of them, seemingly, had their negative experiences with demons, elves, werewolves & more. she was scared & thus, only showed her inhumane strength which all of them admired.

after a month; the three of them took yunaeisha in as their fourth member & thus, traveled further south, leaving the small village behind them. frank trained her in archery & soon, the female developed her own technique & style when it came to shooting arrows. the female even began experimenting with knives & took a liking to throw them even more; it fascinated frank & he asked her to train him as well. augusta & ludwig also practiced with yuna, giving her swordsmanship capabilities the finishing touches to perfect them. within a few months; all of them became better versions of themselves in terms of power & skill. 

however, the peace, the laughter, the happiness; it shouldn’t last for so long. after a year of traveling, the small group were tasked with a mission that seemed like any other mission; nothing out of the ordinary. the jewelry of a young maiden was stolen by a middle-aged woman. & through a very detailed description of the criminal; she was easy to be found. nevertheless; there was a certain uneasiness within yuna as they approached her hunched over form within the middle of a clearing; augusta & ludwig were to accompany her while frank hid within the trees to eliminate her from a distance if needed. with each step the female took; she saw the forest in flames; corpses of her friend laying to her feet; her hand bloody; a vision ? it was a trap ! but it was too late for her to react; the sky above them darkened & within seconds had the middle-aged woman changed her appearance to a tall young woman with black hair, chopped off irregularly. a eye-patch; a familiar scent; no. the surprise had been on both sides. it was darrsha. 

malicious intent turned to surprise & then, at least for the large woman, happiness. yuna’s companions didn’t understand anything; this demon was happy ? the brute took a step towards the back as darrsha approached her; augusta & ludwig were both ready to attack but the demon ignored them; she rather run towards their newest member & gave her a hug ? 

how wundervoll, yuna ! you’ve lured these hunters right into my trap. but she didn’t, did she ? something told her that this whole mission seemed wrong but she didn’t tell anyone. but what does this mean, yuna ? are you a traitor ? are you a demon ? she is my sister. a demon. a traitor. 

& then; a bloodbath ensued. she had to fight against her own kin; fight against her friends; against her family ? within the last seconds of the fight; she stood before a decision; who would you kill ? your sister ? your loved ones ? your family ? they were all the same; she couldn’t. & thus, her sister did it. she killed both augusta & ludwig only inches before her. 

to this day, she can still feel it on her skin; the warm blood that splattered onto her face; the hatred within their eyes; the sadness; everything. you have gotten weak, yuna. never will i have to see you like this again; strengthen your heart, don’t become weak for these humans. 

were these her words or those of her sister ? she doesn’t remember. she hopes frank escaped safely. she isn’t sure. but she hopes. 

THE VALLEY OF THE GODDESS

some years after the events within south-germany; yuna was once again alone. she left for greece this time; a beautiful country as it seemed. however, before doing so, she changed her appearance; a tall, slender figure with tanned skin; big ocean eyes & long, blonde curly hair that would reach her calves. everything of her former identity was erased; she could start life anew. however, her preparations would not suffice; she was still yunaeisha adynora, brood of lilith even with a new appearance. 

this time, she would avoid any sort of contact with humans. she settled down in a valley where the sun never set; the moon engulfed this place with so much light that it seemed like the sun. it was beautiful; not one human hand had ever touched these parts of the land. she became one with the plants, the flowers, the trees; she studied them, learned from them, gave & took. the animals were not afraid of her; as time passed, they became her companions; they crowded her whenever she was awake, loving her warmth. deers would rest with her; birds would sit upon arms & locks of golden hair. her clothing was reduced by a white loose dress; nothing special. & while she was happy, she also grew weak; there were no humans to feast on. the only vital energy she could harvest was from her own nightmares; it was too little. & thus, she had to visit the town nearby; she had to be careful not to get caught. 

with that, every night that would come, the female escaped the valley & would visit the people while they slept. with her other-worldly looks, she would appear like a deity within their chambers; a deity that needed their sexual energy to survive. & while, yuna herself, never spoke to be a goddess, the town’s people perceived her as such; gifted with euphoria & erotic energy when they slept with her. soon; the word would spread that this town was under the blessing of a demi-goddess. they would build a small shrine to cherish yuna within her new form, claiming that she was the child of himeros (son of aphrodite, god of sexual desire) & named her PHILE ( trans. to love ). & whilst, she would never speak to them; they loved her dearly. 

every night would the town relinquish in the erotic energy the “goddess” provided & sleep with their partner to sacrifice their sexual desire to phile. yunaeisha, as her other identity, would grow stronger & stronger through that. however, as the blonde woman, as every night, would wander the streets something out of the ordinary happened; the town was set on fire. a monster; a demon ! it was attacking the town; & while the woman swore to never soften for humans; she felt the urge to protect them from this monster. 

this time; she didn’t knew the demon that dared to harm the people of this town; it was an amalgamation of terrified souls, having multiple human heads & yet, the body of a lion as it crawled around & set everything on fire. as she stepped forward; all the people cheered for her. she felt strong; she felt loved; she felt powerful. with ease had she created an invisible shield out of energy; summoning parts of broken houses with her telekinetic abilities, only to throw them at the monster. but as they screamed with joy; she could hear terror, pain & wailing. wait...it was coming from this monster! suddenly, she would stop her attacks, withdrawing her shield. everyone became terrified; screaming that the gods & goddesses had forsaken them.  she stepped closer; on barefoot; the loose white gown trailing after her. it was scared; it was a helpless soul. & as she touched its middle; leaning her forehead against his grey skin; she could understand it. 

the pain. the torture of this animal. it all seemed so familiar. tears would flow; she spoke to this being, a tortured soul but not of a human; it was a lion cursed with the souls of these humans who have tortured this poor animal to death. & for what ? the fur, the meat. it was disgusting. & as they screamed for her to kill the monster; she felt her soul rumble. she turned towards the town & screamed; it shattered everything in its path. her eyes were ridden of her blue irises; they shone like two stars. because while she posed as a demi-god, yuna forgot that, truly, she was also born from a goddess. the love for this poor creature had awakened it; her purifying powers. she hated this town; she hated the people; she hated everyone. how could they have betrayed her like that ? she could hear the thoughts they had while killing this poor soul; die ! die ! die ! die ! monster ! monster ! beast ! & she would let them feel the true power of such a beast. 

& the next morning; she was awoken by the smell of smoke; she laid within her white dress, though, her hair was once again black. she was back in the valley & next to her laid a white lion. she smiled & went back to sleep. 

HER FIRST LOVE

a hundred years later, perhaps even more, perhaps even less; the 1970s were a blessing, better than the 1870s, at least. no more wars to fight, as it seemed. the female decided to break free from her comfort zone & travel to another continent; asia & to be precise, japan. there, she would start working for a modeling agency. she was not crazy popular but a small celebrity, indeed; the opinions on her would differ into both extremes; some would love her & die for her & some hated her so much that they wanted her to die. however, the female didn’t care so much about that, she just wanted to have fun.  

on a cold day within july; a bad omen; her life would change. she was asked to model for a campaign that would promote the MMA fighters of japan; at first, yuna didn’t like the idea & turned it down. however, later agreed on it as the money she would get was raised. also, she found all of the males she would pose with quite attractive, therefore, it wouldn’t be such a bother. & yet, not one of them would speak to her on set; it didn’t upset her as much as she would let on to. & as everything was about to be wrapped up; the blonde one of them would walk up to her & speak with her in Japanese. yuna just looked at him quite perplexed, not understanding one word & asked in English what he was saying. oh, she wasn’t Japanese ! but your name..yuna. it’s actually yunaeisha.

he was quite embarrassed & the laughter of his mates would not aid him in any way; though, yuna found this quite cute, therefore, she would offer him a date to compensate for this little ordeal. he agreed in broken English; at least, it was understandable & quite cute. 

needless to say, one date turned to a couple hundred dates. shisui takeda, 26 years of age, a heartthrob within the MMA community. who would’ve thought that such a dorky personality would every become a couple with yunaeisha ? nobody, thus, quite the outrage ensued within gossip magazines & tabloids, belittling yuna & saying that she was not good for shisui. well, the whole relationship wouldn’t have happened if it wasn’t for shisui’s stubbornness; quite surprising, considering that the female never thought that there was a human who could match her within that trait. whenever there was an interviewer or paparazzi asking about his girlfriend, the male would speak highly of her, talking about future plans; having a big family. & while yuna was angry about his openness; she found it endearing. he was the first person that would openly praise & flaunt her to everyone. & he understood, that her harsh remarks & her teasing; they were substituting the “i love you” he never got. 

when he was in bruises, she kissed each & every one of them. when she awoke from a nightmare, he would hold her until she fell asleep again. when she told him everything; what she was, what she did; he still loved her. when he told her about his rough childhood; how his father died in a car-crash & his mother was always shunned for being the single parent for him, not wanting to marry again because she still loved his father, yuna smiled & kissed his tears away. they were happy within these five years; so happy that he wanted to propose to her, making her his forever. shisui knew that there would be another outrage, but he didn’t care. he just wanted to be with yuna. 

& on the night of their five-year-anniversary; they met within a fancy restaurant. yuna would once again complain that he was not wearing a suit & his hair was slicked back; she loved his natural hair much more & he loved his biker jacket with the matching leather pants much more. & as the desert drew near; shisui started to become nervous, suddenly starting to talk about how much he loved her & how beautiful she looked. yuna was confused & asked what was wrong. however, just before he was about to get down on one knee, his eyes saw a red spot on her forehead & he jumped in front of her, knowing what that was. 

blood. blood everywhere. screams. tears. pain. EVERYTHING came crashing down at once as shisui laid before her, blood pooling beneath him as his hand pushed against the wound. the bullet had entered his chest. so much blood. yuna panicked; she screamed for a doctor. she didn’t know what to do. her own blood. it didn’t work ! why ? why ? WHY ? a bullet engraved with bible phrases ? a demon hunter. yuna saw shisui’s face; it was wet. wait, was she crying ? but he only smiled. he knew what was coming. but she screamed again. she didn’t even notice how the hunter entered the restaurant; how he stared at her, pointing the gun at her. she couldn’t tear her eyes off shisui. he was everything. he was her past. he was her present. he was her future. i love you he said, coughing up blood, tears starting to form within his own eyes. he raised his arm; something sparkled between his fingers. a ring. oh no. oh no. no no no no no NO NO NO NO NO ! she felt the weight of this; he was going to die. she could feel it. it was too late & with his last breath; he asked her to marry him. 

                                  “ YOU IDIOT ! OF COURSE, I’LL MARRY YOU ! “

& he was gone; his soul, she couldn’t feel it anymore. she could only feel this rage. she was never allowed to love. the last thing she heard was the sound of the gun & the laughter of the hunter. it was all gone. you were alone again. happiness was not for you. never. 

[popatochisssp]

This should come as no surprise but I absolutely *adore* your characterization of Sky! Where do you get your inspiration for his personality? (Also not opposed to learning more about your inspiration for the rest of the boys!) Love ya, Toffee!

Oh boy, okay well, the long and short of it is, I started almost completely from scratch when building my own characterizations of the boys!

Obviously, it’s impossible to ignore/filter out all of the preexisting fanon, but when I first started to develop who I thought the skeles of the various AUs should be, I wanted to get as close to original with it as I could rather than just taking them straight from the fanon and tweaking until they felt ‘right’ to me.

So, we’ll use Sans as an example!

Canon Sans is: a funny guy (puns and pranks), a man of simple pleasures (good food, bad laughs, nice friends), pretty strong moral code (the Judge), lazy/low energy (frequent napping, The General State of His Room)

Now, let’s thought-experiment this bitch– what happens if we take that exact same guy, but swap his motivation and energy levels with his brother’s?

You get Sky (Underswap Sans), of course! Still a fan of bad jokes, still has strong beliefs about right and wrong, but now way more extroverted, socially. He’s exuberantly charming and not only knows how to work a room, but actually has the drive to go do it! He’s intelligent and curious and wants to know things (typical scientist’s mindset), but unlike his canon counterpart, he has the energy to follow up on most of those things, to try out a little bit of everything just to understand and experience it; because he can!

Same process brought about Jasper (Underfell Sans): Canon Sans, but dropped into a violent universe with a credo of Kill or Be Killed.

Well, his humor’s not gonna be as lighthearted, probably a little darker, a little more into blue comedy territory or even gallows humor. Moral code ain’t gonna last long growing up in a place like that, so he’s gonna be jaded and bitter about a whole lotta stuff, and hoo-boy, if Sans Classic is tired and depressed, this poor bastard is gonna be exhausted and miserable, nothing’s gonna sound better to him than a long-ass fuckin’ nap where he doesn’t have to worry about gettin’ stabbed in the back or somethin’.

Keep on keepin’ on here with Mal (Swapfell Sans): what if we dropped Sky into a Kill or Be Killed world?

All his energy and motivation is going to get funneled straight into his sense of responsibility– he feels the need to step up and take on this world where anyone can be an enemy, where Jasper was just too tired and beaten down for that. Mal is still sharp and likes to know everything that he can, but he’s also learned how to use all of what he knows and has and can offer, whether that’s socially or politically or in combat. Looking out for himself and his own is his priority so he uses his intelligence as a weapon, both defensively and offensively, to make all kinds of strategic moves to get him and his brother into the safest positions possible. He still has a moral code…but not a very altruistic one, if nobody else is playing very fair. It’s pretty much just that he’ll do what he has to do and reward the ones who cooperate with money or help to encourage further, future cooperation. He’s not entirely a sadistic, evil bastard, he really just wants his family to be safe and happy, and for that to happen, things need to go…correctly. He will make things go correctly, because he can.

I went through this thought-experiment already for Slate (Horrortale Sans) over here, and this post is getting long so I’m not gonna tack on the Papyri, but it’s the same concept!

I started with the source character, considered the basic premise of the AU, and then tried to come up with what I thought that guy would be like if born and raised there– still the same character, but developed in a different environment that gave them different quirks and qualities without making them wholly unrecognizable, parts of the original canon still shining through here and there.

…But y’know, that’s just how I did things! I’m sure just about every author/artist/content-creator in this fandom had their own thought-process for how they characterize these skeletons and their alternate universe selves, and they’re all really cool and valid, too! :D

[notintheipswichboyband]

CHARACTER REVIEW

NAME: Chase “Collins”  Goodwin-Pope

NICKNAME: Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing (He has no real nickname...)

AGE: 18 - 300 something, depending on which verse he’s in.

SPECIES: Witch

[Personal]

MORALITY: lawful / neutral / chaotic / good / neutral / evil / true

RELIGIOUS BELIEF: Grew up in an extremely religious family. But has not been religious himself, in years.

SINS: greed / gluttony / sloth / lust / pride / envy / wrath

VIRTUES: chastity / charity / diligence / humility / kindness / patience/ justice

PRIMARY GOALS IN LIFE:  Getting enough of The Power to do....something... 

LANGUAGES KNOWN: English

SECRETS:  Chase has all the secrets, whatever those are...many remain to be known. He doesn’t focus a lot on himself, overall. 

SAVVIES:  Chase is very good at quite a lot of things. He is possibly a Hacker, which would make him good with Tech. He was also born with an innate understanding of The Power, long before his Biological father ever came in, and gave them their Power, when he ascended. It all seemingly comes natural to him, he has a somewhat profound understanding of most tasks he takes on. Coupled with an equally incredible ability to pick up those tasks easily when he starts to understand them. Chase is also good, not great, at pretending to be someone he is not, in order to get what he wants. And it is not because of other people finding anything on him that usually would break his act, more that it is Chase himself who usually would break it because he’s in a hurry.

[Physical]

BUILD: scrawny / bony / slender / fit / athletic / curvy / herculean / pudgy / average

HEIGHT: 5′9

WEIGHT: 120

SCARS/BIRTHMARKS: He has minor scars on his body from typical childhood injuries, and some not so minor ones from an attempted exorcising of a demon, which his very religious parent’s thought he had been possessed by. This was prior to the events of The Barn. After the fight with Caleb at the barn Chase now has severe burn scars along a vast part of his body, as well as surgical scars from doctors working on his internal bleeding and broken spine. 

ABILITIES/POWERS: Dependent on verse, but typically he mostly has the powers as an average witch ( as The Covenant does leave much to actually be a convincing witch with). Before the fight at the barn Chase has his canon verse powers, usually, depending on how I feel about it. After that is where he will typically have a lot more abilities to use. 

RESTRICTIONS: Chase is a neutral evil character. But, he’s not of course, hateful. His actions are out of purpose, he feels he’s been slighted in some way. His family cast out unjustly for hundreds of years. And made to pretty much suffer, for the sins of John Putnam, against his own people. Of which NONE of the rest of his family had anything to do with. This along with everything from his 13th birthday leading up till pretty much now has given him a really bad temper problem that he struggles, really struggles with maintaining. He can manage it for a bit, especially to reach a goal. And it’s most likely usually only going to be lashed out toward The Sons of Ipswich anyway. 

[Favorites]

FOOD: Chase is a big fan of food. Hamburgers, chicken, fries, steak, fruit, candy, honey- there’s very few things he doesn’t like. 

DRINK: Slushies, Smoothies

PIZZA TOPPING: All the meat. 

COLOUR: Forest green

MUSIC GENRE: Classical, Metal, Rap Metal, Punk

BOOK GENRE: Chase is also a really big fan of books. Can’t be helped when since childhood nobody wanted to be your friend because they could already sense you were a bit of a freak. 

MOVIE GENRE: Chase loves all kinds of movies, he likes to quote them sometimes, or make allusive jokes toward a movie or show. 

SEASON: Fall

CURSE WORD: Fuck

SCENT(S): Rain, Wood, Old Books, Old House, Lightning, 

[Fun Stuff]

BOTTOM OR TOP: Dependent. But usually he doesn’t care about any of that. Because he’s more interested in The Power, seeing as he’s extremely fucking addicted to it. 

SINGS IN THE SHOWER: Not usually, no. Maaaybe a little bit, depending on whatever song might pop into his head, or he may be listening to. Plus he takes Baths, he’s not a fucking savage. 

LIKES BAD PUNS: Oh yeah, absolutely, but only the ones that come from him, everyone elses can get fucked. 

tagged by: No one

tagging: Anyone who wants to do this. 

[xranker]

Questions About Hell I Never Thought to Ask When I Was Christian

0 Comments Questions About Hell I Never Thought to Ask When I Was Christian June 4, Hi and welcome back! As y’all know, I grew up as a very fervent Christian before deconverting around 1994 I deconverted because I found out the religion’s main claims simply aren’t true That said, for years afterward I kept finding more and more Christian claims that turned out to be equally untrue! Deconversion opened up a whole new capacity to make observations and ask questions that I’d never imagined while I was Christian And a lot of those observations and questions came up around the topic of Hell Join me today for a romp through the stuff about Hell I never even thought about till after leaving Christianity! ( James Lee ) The photographer isn’t kidding! — See here for a list of cities named for some variant of Hell This one’s in the Cayman Islands (I decided we’ll need a second part to this post about similar questions about Heaven Stay tuned for that one on Saturday. Also, it is very important to me to note that most of the following questions have hand-waving answers I guarantee any Christians reading this post that I’ve heard these false answers since deconverting. I consider them unsatisfactory Yes, even that one And that one) The Most Sickening, Cruel, and Evil Doctrine in a Religion Full of Contenders for the Title A lot of the really disgusting, grotesque, evil, cruel, stomach-churning gruesomeness in Christianity gets glossed over with centuries of iconography, re-framing, and very fine art and architecture Nonetheless, Christianity remains a very ugly ideology containing largely very ugly foundations Some Christians these days seek to de-fang and redeem this dreadful religion I don’t think it’s possible, but it’s their one lifetime to spend however they wish ( an it harm none ) And usually, they zero in quickly on Christianity’s most repulsive, sickening, and evil doctrine of all: the idea that a good and loving god who cherishes justice and compassion could ever send anybody to the afterlife commonly known by Christians as “Hell” Out of every evil doctrine contained in Christianity, Hell stands supreme as the worst of all of them The moment I know that a particular Christian believes in Hell as a destination for noncompliant humans, I know quite a bit about that person that they really shouldn’t ever want anyone to know Belief in Hell drives humans to do and accept evildoing that chills good people to the bone–and not only to excuse it in their own god, but to revel in the idea of him doing this to their enemies It also cows good people and terrorizes them into bending knee to this evil ideology and those who promote it No wonder early Christian evangelists pushed the idea of Hell so hard No wonder at all It allowed them to work all the dark deeds they craved, to brutally control those who might otherwise oppose them, and to gain power they did not otherwise deserve to wield Oh yes Hell, as a concept, has been most useful to Christian leaders–most useful indeed That’s why they push it hard even today– like John Piper recently did to parents , hoping they’ll impress their young children with the horrors he imagines exist in Hell (Check out his herpy-derp Jesus smile in the pic at that link Sick!) And Yet Hell-belief isn’t universal among Christians–even among the most extremist of them You’d think that evangelicals, having fused completely with fundamentalists by now, would be nearly-unanimous there However, according to the 2015 Pew Religious Landscape Study , only about 82% of them hold that belief The demographics involved are interesting, to say the least In 2016, LifeWay put out their own ( poor-quality ) survey about general Americans’ Hell-belief In it, they discovered that only 40% of survey respondents agreed with their official party line about Hell I don’t take this survey nearly as seriously as I do Pew’s, but it’s useful to gain an idea of general trends Chances are good that America is heading in the same direction as Western Europe in terms of beliefs It all makes me wonder if maybe people are starting to ask some serious questions about a belief that back in my day seemed as universally accepted as, say, belief in Germ Theory Back then, I didn’t even think about some of this stuff I didn’t even know how to formulate these concerns, much less ask serious questions about them First Off, Which Hell? First and foremost, I had no idea how many visions of Hell there are in religions from humanity’s past and present I thought only Christianity had a real Hell As it turns out, however, plenty of religions divide their afterlife into pleasant and unpleasant sections, sending the deserving to the pleasant one after death–and everyone else to the other Wikipedia presents us with a list of some of these Hells: Kur: the Sumerian afterlife Dark, dreary, and unpleasant A lavish burial and libations from family members could alleviate the unpleasantness A lake of fire: Egyptians believed that people who misbehaved in life were thrown there Ammit, a demon goddess called “the devourer of the dead,” ruled it Tartarus: the Greek religion’s place of torment for immoral people Anaon: a sort of Hellish place in old Breton folk religion , where the damned do penance Peklo: an old pagan Slavic Hell where souls atoned for their crimes Rotaimo: the realm of the dead of Sámi shamanism , ruled over by the god Ruohtta Anyone who didn’t live according to the religion’s principles ended up there forever Naraka: in Hinduism, where souls go for expiation of sins Hetgwauge: in the First Nations’ Haida mythology , bad people go to this dismal, unpleasant place to be tortured Among other punishments, souls there get to watch the lord of that realm eating their dead body. I could go on and on and on With so many hells to choose from, why would someone fear Christians’ Hell but none of the others? What makes Christianity’s Hell correct, and all these other Hells incorrect? And I should have wondered this I read mythology voraciously as a child–my family had books around like Bullfinch’s Mythology and the like Somehow, though, it never occurred to me to wonder why the Hell that my society overwhelmingly believed was real just happened to be the one worth fearing over all others How Does Eternal Torture Work Out to Justice? Most Christians who buy into the idea of Hell consider it to be an eternal destination full of absolutely nothing but torture . These same exact Christians also tend to think that when children die young or get born with catastrophic congenital conditions that are completely incompatible with life, all that horrific stuff happens for a reason–even if they don’t know what that reason might be Some of them punt to mystery Others default to sin nature (the idea that the supposed wrongdoing of Adam and Eve passed down to their children for all time; we’ll cover this bizarre, crazymaking notion in more detail soon) What Christians don’t tend to do is insist that these children deserved to suffer and have brief, horrific lives of pain. Such an idea is monstrous, even to them They also don’t tend to believe that these infants and children who die so young end up in Hell There’s a reason why so many Hell-believing Christians issue children a get-out-of-eternal-torture-free card Hell, as it stands, represents the most obscene injustice imaginable It lasts forever Those stuck there can never expect pardons Its pain is purely punitive, not rehabilitative, so it exists purely as a form of vengeance for what largely exist in Christian mythology as thought crimes (such as disbelief in the mythology itself ); going there hinges surprisingly little on how good and decent a person is during life Christians want the people who go to such a cruel fate to deserve it somehow –otherwise their god is unjust And even the TRUEST of TRUE CHRISTIANS™ know that infants did nothing to deserve such a fate Even to suggest such a thing around a dead child’s grieving family would likely provoke a reaction that’d end up on the evening news Why did I never wonder how an eternity of punishment for a finite lifetime’s offenses works out to divine, ultimate justice? Tasting Without a Tongue Of course, I’m getting ahead of myself bigtime. Nobody has ever found any objective support for the idea of any afterlife, much less the Christian conceptualization of it Near-Death Experiences (NDEs) remain subjective and highly-dependent upon their experiencers’ cultural beliefs about the afterlife The fact that finally broke me of the notions of Heaven and Hell is simply this: everything we think, feel, sense with our five senses (or six, as some scientists reckon it, adding in proprioception ) comes from the physical nature of our bodies These bodies, specifically The pleasure we feel from sex, eating, dancing, sleeping in, partying, cuddling our pets, running ultra-marathons, you name it: it derives from pleasant sensations striking our nerve endings, taste buds, visual cortex, and whatnot By stimulating our brains or feeding them chemicals of various sorts, we can be made to feel very strong and pleasant emotions We can do the same to alleviate many unpleasant emotional states. But our bodies die–and what makes us us no longer occupies them afterward In many old religions– like that of the ancient Egyptians –eternal life depended absolutely on the preservation of the body, because the soul reunited with it after death Christians generally believe that they’ll get all-new bodies upon reaching Heaven (though they can’t explain what age, gender, or appearance that body will have without making wild guesses) The problem with that idea is that a lot of what makes us us comes from quirks of DNA and conditioning of the bodies we possess right now And a lot of what many people like in this life, like sex, is stuff that the Bible tells us won’t happen in the afterlife The facts remain: we know of no way for people to sense things without a body We remain unable to demonstrate any human sensory perceptions that exist independently of our bodies Why did I not wonder how I’d feel anything without a body to provide the sensations to me? And why did I not wonder how losing this body I occupy now would radically change who I am as a person? Why Were the Christians Around Me So Sure About Who Was Going to Hell? Speaking of a dead child’s grieving family … When powerhouse Christian evangelist Billy Graham died , all kinds of other Christians knew exactly where his soul went afterward Most felt positive that he’d ascended to Heaven A few others, seeking notoriety, loudly insisted that he’d landed in Hell Ask Christians if a truly evil person is in Heaven or Hell, and usually they insist that this person went to Hell They do this even if that person experienced a miraculous conversion before death, like Jeffrey Dahmer did They don’t like imagining themselves sharing Heaven with serial killers, any more than they like imagining a Hell filled with the souls of those who died all too young Christians all appear to have very strong opinions about who is and isn’t in Hell When it’s the fate of someone they love, they’ll generally abstain from judgment or hope for the best Otherwise, they seem quite certain Indeed, I saw many of my peers gloating about the idea of people going to Hell They still do gloat about it , just like they have for many centuries Why didn’t I notice just how self-serving Christians’ opinions were when it came to who was heading for Hell? Why didn’t I notice how often their opinions meshed with their own desires and worldview? Not Without My Mother Now we arrive at possibly my biggest sticking point with Hell-belief This is the one I truly wish had driven me from Christianity, the one I wish had been my dealbreaker I wish it’d been my line crossed–my stentorian roar, my barked-out this far and no further It wasn’t But I wish I’d had the integrity, strength, and compassion back then for it to have been so Why did I not value my loved ones more than I did? Why was I willing to allow Christians to use my fear to separate me from those I loved most? These questions represent a regret that drives me to tears sometimes Every so often, it makes me bite my knuckles, moan fitfully to myself in near-sleep, shake my head as if doing any of this could ever deny those thoughts access to my mind Sometimes, it even works I was just a kid , FFS , so I try to be as gentle as I can with myself Immediately and always and at the end, Mom forgave me The least I can do is try to forgive myself Still, it gets to me sometimes I know damned well what she would have said if someone had tried telling her to abandon her daughters to Hell and enter Heaven without us She’d’a told ’em to stick it! But I folded immediately Why didn’t I notice anything weird about the way so many Christians utilize terror to sell a god of love? Seriously, THIS Is the Best This God Could Do? Part of what I’m talking about today is the Problem of Hell Christians named it that because they can’t satisfactorily answer it So they capitalized it and largely declared the whole shebang too mysterious to answer. Basically, it runs like this: Given that Hell is monstrous, evil, unjust, and in every way antithetical to the values of love, mercy, justice, and compassion, how in the world can any god who values that stuff allow anyone to go to such a realm? I can really see why some Christians opt out of the whole mess by renouncing the entire concept But Jesus clearly believed that Hell was a real place He also taught that it was somewhere people could end up going –even if they were positive they were going to Heaven But the idea of Hell gets even worse than that when we start wondering how an omnimax god could even have designed a cosmology involving Hell I’m not even a god and I could do a lot better than what Christianity has evolved over the centuries It’s beyond painfully obvious to me now that Hell exists in Christianity because its hucksters couldn’t sell the religion without it They still can’t. Hell: The Cage of Feral Rats, Lowered Over Christians’ Heads It hurts to think that anything could have terrorized me so much that I would ever forget what is most important I forgot every single value important to me: objective truth, compassion, kindness, community, integrity, all of it No more Not ever again Christians can keep their evil god and their disgustingly perverse doctrine of eternal torture for noncompliance They can use it to sever ties of their own–to rend mother from child, brother from sister, and lovers from each other But I know the tactic for what it is now Woe betide the next charlatans seeking to induce terror in me, hoping that fear will ensure an easier sale of whatever snake oil they’re selling See, thanks to Christianity, I now know exactly what questions to ask about whatever pitch they try NEXT UP: A quirky little 80s cartoon becomes relevant again–somehow What in the world?!? Join me next time and find out! Then we ask the big questions wondered about when I was Christian Read the full article

[mayacatmaster]

I'm 100% Sure I'm Going To Hell In Every Religion/Moral-Belief-System.  *** *** ***  Want me to read the rules of your Group before I join?  I don’t want pick up it as “me; mine; myself & real; true”, the rules of your Group….None of my own business. *** *** ***  No matter how good a person you are, you are evil in someone's story. Moral Rules of your Group is world No.1 and want me join? ...Bye! *** *** ***  You Were Raised By The System, Brainwashed By The System, I See Why You Get Mad When I Say Fuck The System. *** *** *** You Were Never Broken, You Were Just Heavily Programmed.  So Follow Order Like Dog said it’s what made me a “man”(woman; children) And Said what our Moral Rules Of Our Group Is World No.1 *** *** ***⋯⋯ What If I Told You  The Reason They Don't Teach You Your Rights In School Is Because It's Easier To Take Them Away Don't Even Know What They Are  *** *** *** Don't Let Them Fool You Or Even Try To School You, Oh No  We've Got A Mind Of Our Own. ~Bob Marley *** *** *** Believe Nothing, No Matter ‘Where”(no matter what kind of religion/moral-belief-system holy books) You Read It, Or “Who”(no matter what kind of Authority; sage; guru; celebrity) Has Said, Not Even If “I”(Buddha) Have Said it, Unless It Agrees With Your Own Reason And  Your Own Common Sense. ~ Buddha *** *** *** The Matrix is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see It when you look out your wind0W, or when you turn on your television. You can feel it when you go to work, when you go to church, when you pay your taxes. It is the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth. You are a slave Neo. Like everyone else you were born Into bondage, born into a prison that you cannot smell or taste or touch.  A prison for your mind." ~Morpheus: The Matrix *** *** *** So....: I’m Secure In Who I Am.  I Don't Need The Validation Of Those That Would Say You Have To Be A Certain Way In Order To Be Accepted.  I’m Comfortable Going Against The Grain.  I'm Walking My Path And I Will Always Walk The Direction My Heart Tells Me To Go, Even If I Must Walk Alone.  All Fired Up

*** *** ***

Let go of fear, man-made-religion-moral-belief-system and fly.

*** *** ***

I According To The Most Simplest “Cosmic Principle”(Tao; Source; Ma At; Brahma) Respond To Everything, Every Living Being. I Can Be Mean As Fuck Sweet As Candy.  Cold As Ice. Evil As Hell Or Loyal just like Cosmic Principle Itself.  It All Depends On You. I Use My Heart Like Mirror, Witness …. And Mirror The Most Simplest “Cosmic Principle”(Tao; Source; Ma At; Brahma) In Every Area/Topic …:

*** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***

The Story Of The Badass Cat How To Use Their Demon:

*** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***

Me: Whose Dog Are You

Dog: I'm Your Dog I’m Your Dog Yes Yes Yes Twirl Twirl.

*** *** ***

Me: Whose Cat Are You

Cat: Possession Is A Solipsistic Paradigm,

Vivian. However, If I Were To Define Myself As Belonging To Anyone, It Would Be Myself.

*** *** ***

Vivian….:

You were programmed to Kiss-ass, time to wake up. Specially when you said…: I follow orders like a dog, it's what made me a "man"(woman; children). *** *** ***  If you ever…: Look at the owner of the dog on the street, and the dog already being chain with shacked both walking together. 你看街上遛狗的主人，及被遛的狗， *** *** ***  And when the dog gets free, if you see that moment, when the dog releases the rope around his neck, and you can see that dog happy, joyful can not help by itself…: 而當那條狗在主人套在脖子上的繩子放開時，狗獲得自由，而你可以看狗兒快樂逍遙的無法自拔--------- *** *** ***  But, when person is only living their whole life just like dog and owner walking on the street together. Everything they are doing is worthless because its value is given by the owner! 但是，當一個人像街上那條狗一般，它所做的一切都是沒有價值的，因為它的價值是由主人給的！ *** *** ***  The value is given by the dog owner.  If today, you are obedient, give you a bread, give you a piece of meat, and it all.  This is my evaluation of the value you have made. 價值是狗主人給的，你今天聽話，給你一塊饅頭，給你一塊肉，行了，這就是我對你所作的價值的評價。 *** *** ***  OK, as a mankind, it’s same... when I loosen the external-egoism-rule-standard that are placed around your neck, you are free, but you have no value at this time. 好了，作為人類存在本身，當我把這個套在你脖子上的外在規範一鬆，你恢復自由了，但這個時候你也沒有價值， *** *** ***  Yes, when you go out and run, it’s the freedom that the dog owner gives. 對的，你出去亂跑亂跳，那是狗主人給予的自由， *** *** ***  At in that time, it really belonged to the dog itself, so it was very happy at this time, even though it was the freedom given by the dog owner’s own egoism-rule-standard- value. 那個時候是真正屬於那只狗它自己的，所以這個時候它非常高興，盡管這是由狗主人一己價值所賦予的自由， *** *** ***  But this is the time when the dog is most happy in his whole life, because the lock on his neck has been removed. 但這卻是那隻狗它一生最高興的時候，因為它的脖子上的鎖已經被取掉了， *** *** ***  And maybe the dog is very well disciplined and must be grateful to say: "This ruler's grace , and the emperor’s grace is very, very huge, so thanks God!", 而那隻狗搞不好還被規訓成要心懷感激說："皇恩浩湯"， *** *** ***  And take that dog’s chain as a matter of course, a kind of naturally, take that dog’s chain for granted and said it’s the golden rule of the world! 並且把那條狗鍊子視之為理所當然、天經地義的金科玉律！ *** *** *** 

Someone Once Said: "If You Look At The People In Your Circle And Don't Get Inspired, Then You Don't Have A Circle, You Have A Cage." *** *** *** How To Use Your Demon??? *** *** *** Maybe, maybe,...You're Crazy To Everyone Who Can't Manipulate You. Because you said...I Don't Kiss Ass So If You Mad At Me Stay Mad. ~Badass cat *** *** *** How To Use Your Demon??? Being Badass cat. Because…: No Dark Tyranny Rulers. If Nobody Obey. *** *** *** Fear and obedience are one of the elites tool to control the masses. *** *** *** And your demons 99% of majority of them come from ...”You are a victim of the rules you live by!”. *** *** *** And…: You are a victim of the rules you live by. *** *** *** Because…: If this is all a dream, a Maya, a mirage, it's long as fuck....: Because lesson repeats until it is learned….: It has 5000 years in China. It has 7,000 years in India. *** *** *** Don't Worry About The Judgments Of Others, They Are Telling You Their Story.  Not Yours.  *** *** *** It Is Very Simple And Easy To Watch A Person Who Is Really Spiritual. If He/She Is Spiritual They Will Never Have A Narrow Mind. Or A Moralistic Mind. That Is One Of The Basic Qualities Of The Truly Spiritual Mind That They Will Not have a Condemnatory Attitude. They Will Love So Deeply That They Cannot Condemn That Is Impossible For A Really Spiritual Person… ~Osho *** *** *** Know yourself first. Before judging others…! Judging your judgment first. Before judging others…! *** *** *** Your Mind Is Programmable And If You're Not Programming It Then Someone Else Will Program It For You.  *** *** *** People are very fond of talking about morality.  But morality is merely self-suggestion.  What is necessary is conscience.  ~ George Gurdjieff Quotes *** *** *** People don't need “Religion”(moral-belief-system), “Religion”(moral-belief-system) needs people.  They're just corporations and they need your money to thrive.  “Religion”(moral-belief-system) doesn't make you a better person, intelligence and kindness does. “Religion”(moral-belief-system) doesn't feed the poor, good people with big hearts do that. Just remember that. -Don Freeman *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** Via and thanks “Mina Milos”: *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** Always Listen To What Your Heart Says. It Your Left Side.  But It Is Always Right.  *** *** *** “Conscience”(religion/morality-belief-system) is always created by others. It is a manipulation, it is a subtle slavery.  “Conscience”(religion/morality-belief-system) is created by you and “YOU”(Source; Tao; Brahma).  *** *** *** It is your own effort...by self inquiry, self study, self Practice, self verification and see what can really, really, really help you or another….: *** *** *** Can Mirror the most simplest “Cosmic Principle”(Tao; Source; Ma at; Brahma) in every area/topic. Can alignment with your Source and as alignment-deliberate-creator. Let you or another beautiful dream come true or at least can cease, can get rid bitter-bad-life-fruits-Vicious-circle. *** *** *** No matter of it on what kind of area/topic. to stand on your own two feet, to look at life and to gather enough courage/wisdom to live according to your light/insight. *** *** *** Life Is Much Easier When You Just Don't Care What Anyone Thinks. ~Abraham *** *** *** Decide What Kind Of Life You Really Want...  And Then, Say No To Everything That Isn't That.  *** *** *** The Greatest Thing You Can Give Yourself Is Freedom From What Others Think. ~Abraham Hicks  *** *** *** Trust that the power that moves the stars/moon/sun in the heavens is taking you on a journey where the only destination IS love, self expression, joy, and an abundant experience of life. *** *** *** And...: Follow the force that is guiding the whole universe is in you.  Pledge allegiance to your "Source"(God; True Self; Tao; Logos),  everything is done! ~Huangdi Yinfujing 「觀天之道，執天之行，盡矣！」: 黃帝陰符經； *** *** *** You are never along or helpless.  The force that is guiding the whole universe is in you too! *** *** *** For Fuck Sake Janice. Just Listen To Me  People Don't Know They're Being  Poisoned Brainwashed And Enslaved Because They're Being Poisoned  Brainwashed And Enslaved.  *** *** *** Children are born alignment with “Source”(True Self; Tao). Until we brainwash/Indoctrination them as sheep/ blind-obey-dog. Use the name God/religion/moral/country-social-family-belief-system preach/teach how to kiss any kind of dark-tyrants-rulers-ass. *** *** *** You are a victim of the rules you live by. *** *** *** For Fuck Sake Janice. I know, I know, I know what you give your woman/children/people moral-belief-standard is world No.1. ***  What you give their perfect-good-behaviors is world No.1. ***  So they can only as your blind-obey-dog, your blind-follow-sheep, otherwise they are bad guy, they are sinner, bad, should punishable by imprisonment or death. ***  And you feel you are great, you are saint, you are great teacher/guru. *** *** *** I know, I know, I know what your so call kind, compassion is only want people donate their money, their time, their energy built your beautiful temple. But your beautiful temple just ignored those homeless, ignored those socially abandoned women and children. *** *** *** The Pollution Of The Planet Is Only An Outward Reflection Of An Inner Psychic Pollution:  Millions Of Unconscious Individuals Not Taking Responsibility For Their Inner Space.  *** *** *** Mindset.  It's all about mindset.  From the moment you wake up, to the moment you rest your head at night. Everything is up to you.  Your emotions, your thoughts, your perceptions, your reactions.  Every moment.  *** *** *** The Matrix Is Real It Exists Inside The Minds Of The Masses Through Social Cultural Political, Educational & Religious/morality-belief-system Indoctrination *** *** *** So To my all Facebook friend….: You Cannot Raise Your Children The Way Your Parents Raised You.  Because Your Parents Raised You For A World That No Longer Exists, Unless You Decide, You Pick Up It, You Want Recycle It. *** *** *** Because….If this is all a dream, a Maya, a mirage, it's long as fuck....: Because lesson repeats until it is learned….: It has 5000 years in China, It has 7,000 years in India,….: *** *** *** Intelligence:  Not Because You Think You Know Everything Without Questioning,  But Rather Because You Question  Everything You Think You Know.  *** *** *** Be Authentic By Accepting And Living Your Truth, By Alignment With Your Source And As An Alignment-Deliberate-Creator, You Are Honoring Your Soul. *** *** *** We live in a society where hardly anyone has been taught how to think. While millions have been taught what to think.  *** *** *** When People Are More Upset About A “Religious”(moral-belief-system) Building.  Than They Are About Their “Religious”(moral-belief-system)Freedoms Being Taken Away.  *** *** *** And they said, preach/teach their “Religious”(moral-belief-system) purpose is for you, …: Let you can alignment with your “Source”(True Self; Tao) and as an alignment-deliberate-creator. Let you can beautiful dream come true or at least can help you get rid painful-bitter-life-fruits-Vicious circle. *** *** *** But if they really, really, really want help you….: Trust that the power that moves the stars/moon/sun in the heavens is taking you on a journey where the only destination IS love, self expression, joy, and an abundant experience of life. *** *** *** And help you realized….: Follow the force that is guiding the whole universe is in you.  Pledge allegiance to your "Source"(God; True Self; Tao; Logos),  everything is done! ~Huangdi Yinfujing 「觀天之道，執天之行，盡矣！」: 黃帝陰符經； *** *** *** And as an alignment-deliberate-creator. Let you can beautiful dream come true or at least can help you get rid painful-bitter-life-fruits-Vicious circle. *** *** *** They will help you alignment with your “Source”(True Self; Tao) and as an alignment-deliberate-creator and not the vice versa. *** *** *** Vain are the beliefs and teachings that make man miserable, and false is the goodness that leads him into sorrow and despair -- for it is man's purpose to be happy on this earth and lead the way to felicity and preach it's gospel wherever he goes. He who does not see the kingdom of heaven in this life will never see it in the coming life. We came not into this life by exile, but we came as innocent creatures of God, to learn how to worship the holy and eternal spirit and seek the hidden secrets within ourselves from the beauty of life. ~ Kahlil Gibran *** *** *** I Don't Get Mad.  I Get Distant.  *** *** *** Intelligence:  Not Because You Think You Know Everything Without Questioning,  But Rather Because You Question  Everything You Think You Know. *** *** *** To develop a complete mind:  Study the science of art;  Study the art of science.  Learn how to see.  Realize that everything  connects to everything else. ~Leonardo da Vinci *** *** ***

[professoriisms-archive]

Drabble ~ Twice Upon a Time

The Doctor only just managed to get the controls working, but finally – along with his son, the Professor, and his oldest friend, Rumplestiltskin (otherwise known as Mr Gold) – he got the ship into motion. The noise of the take off filling the console. He was going to die in the Vortex then. Well, his friends and family would take his body elsewhere. Storybrooke, maybe? He looked at the console, then at Mr Gold and the Professor, before Clara Oswald and his granddaughter, Ellie Rose Oswald.

The ship was showing him on the monitor a diagram of all of time and space. What? Was this meant to be what lay ahead for him to explore? “Oh, there it is. Silly old universe. The more I save it, the more it needs saving. It’s a treadmill.”

He felt so ... old.  So completed.  He had wondered in this incarnation, about every aspect of himself, about his worth, his beliefs, his meaning in the universe that seemed to have forgotten everything he had learned and didn’t see the need to consult him as it was learning those harsh lessons itself, over and over.  He had lived through that. He had lived out the human life he had always envied. He had put aside the questions of his youth, about the mysterious victories of good over evil, as a conundrum that could never be solved. He had known lasting love, he had found peace, he had died a good death, to save others, already. What more could be for him to learn? He would not be merely the sum of his memories, something to be collected in the Matrix, he would put a proper full stop on the end of his life, like ... well, he’d been about to think ‘like humans did’, but ... but he’d just discovered they didn’t do that, hadn’t he? He’d just discovered something ... new.

This damned universe, mocking him at his moment of greatest fear.

“Dad?” The Professor spoke up, interrupting the Doctor of this thought. “You’re legacy will live through us. Through all of us. Whatever you decide.”

Mr Gold nodded. “You have done so much, Doctor. You have touched many, many lives. Mine included,” he remarked. “How about you treat yourself to a nice lifetime, where you just relax.”

The Doctor nodded slowly. “The universe will get it wrong without me,” he mused. “Without us.”

The console room made a series of mechanical noises of the kind the Doctor generally accepted as being those of a voice. They spoke more of the people and the universe. They spoke of a memory that he had in his head. One that the machine made him think about.

“Perhaps there’s just some bloke,” the voice of Bill had said. “Wandering around, putting everything right when it goes wrong.”

The Doctor almost laughed. He almost laughed a laugh so big it nearly brought on the change on its own. Oh. Oh! He had learned another new thing, although really he had already known it. He was such ... an idiot. A complete idiot – or at least, an idiot who had been completed by this realisation of his own stupidity. Because he had learned new things, had changed twice, in the space of the last few minutes.

Testimony was a human system. It would not save them all. Not in all the universes. The Bubble universes. And maybe it couldn’t detect Storybrooke.  It could not save everyone from the pain and the horror. It would not see where lives did not have to end, where change was possible. It was just something instead of death. Someone still had to save people. Someone had to help people. But ... Not someone who was pleased with the life he had completed.

He was satisfied. He had done the best he could. Change was required, but it always was.”Well ...” he whispered, “well, I suppose one more lifetime ... won’t hurt anyone.” He could feel the light begin to play with his hands. He had released it to do so. “Except me.”

The sound of the Cloister Belle began to reverberate through the console room. So, this regeneration was going to be another big one, was going to be explosive. He looked over at the Professor, then at Mr Gold, and nodded at both of them. They instantly knew and walked over to Clara and Ellie.

Ellie looked around. She held onto Clara’s arm. “Whats going on?” She asked.

“Just stay close to us,” the Professor said, kissing Ellie’s head softly.

The Doctor climbed slowly onto the higher level. “You wait a moment, Doctor,” he called to the spirit of the future that he could already feel jostling to squeeze into his molecules. There were a few things he wanted to say to whatever old or young pale-skinned man took his place. Because he was one of those stuck-in-a-rut Time Lords who always got the same model of body. He wouldn’t be ginger, either, with his rotten luck. “Let’s get it right! I’ve got a few things to say to you.”

He swayed giddily along the deck. The TARDIS did seem to be reacting oddly to his impending change, as it were already in trouble, but ... woo, that was something for the next guy to worry about. “Basic stuff first. Never be cruel. Never be cowardly.” Grasping on to the railing, he suddenly pointed to the spectre of the future in front of him. “And never ever eat pears!” Because that was his personal taste, damn it. That was a quirk born from experience, and he didn’t want to squander it. That had been with him since his tenth life. Or was it eleventh. It was hard to keep track of them all. And that man had became human for a while. And when he did, what did he do? Eaten all the pears, that’s what, and he had to wake up from that experience with a mouth full of that. He was suddenly struck with something he really didn’t want to pass on, something that was the product  of much longer experience. “Remember,” he called, “hate is always foolish, and love ...” He let himself recall the long details of his own love for a moment. “Love is always wise.”

“Pay attention, Ellie,” Clara told her daughter quietly. “This is what our family lives for. What you will live for too.”

The Doctor stumbled back down the stairs from his high and mighty pulpit., back to the console back again. This is where he had lain that first time, wasn’t it? He could do worse. “Always try to be nice,” he hissed through the increasing pain. “But never fail to be kind.” He stumbled on, past the console, past the others, hilariously, all the way to the doors, like he was going somewhere. He felt drunk on the energy of renewal, of completion. He spun back and yelled into the room. “Oh! And! You mustn’t tell anyone your name.” His walk took him back towards the floor that awaited him. “They wouldn’t understand it anyway. Except -”

He didn’t make it past the console this time. The pain took him, and he fell. He lay there for  a moment. He started to boil. The steam was rising from him. His flesh was in a crucible. Or was that also the smoke from ... was there something wrong with the TARDIS? He didn’t know either way. He hauled himself up. He would finish his sentences. He would end deliberately and consciously. His life’s meaning would be complete.

“Except children. Children can hear your name, sometimes. If their hearts are in the right place, and the stars are too.” He thought of the children the future Doctor would meet, those that would be inspired by him. By ... them? What was this? Agony seized him again, and he reflexively grabbed the console. “But nobody else,” he whispered, pulling himself to his feet. “Nobody else, ever.” This was his house. His rules. These were what a man had to hang on to. But he had to let go. Because ... oh. Oh yes. He could see someone now. In his mind’s eye. He could see the future.

“Laugh hard. Run fast,” he said to them. Not only to his future. But to his companions on the other side of the console. “Be kind.”

He stood there. He adjusted his cuffs. It was all going to be alright. Of course it was. Seeing who he was going to be, he was suddenly filled with ... hope.

The Professor wrapped his arms around Clara and Ellie, with Mr Gold on the other side of them. He had tears starting to show in his eyes. All had their eyes welling up. The knew how dangerous regeneration was. All but one remembered the last time the Doctor regenerated. And it was a whopper.

“Doctor,” he said. “I let you go.”

He let the fire take him.

* * *

And there the new Doctor was: standing in clothes that were far too big, in uncomfortable boots, looking at the steaming mess that the regeneration process had made of the console. The ring fell from the Doctor’s finger. It made a small noise as it fell to the floor of the TARDIS.

“Dad?” The Professor asked, his gaze shifting to the shoulder-length blonde haired woman that stood in place of the Doctor.

The Doctor took a deep breath. Okay, focus on one thing. One thing. Here was the monitor, which was buzzing with static, the image on it flickering. What was it to be this time? There was something different about this body, wasn’t there? Facing her was a young woman with a swish of blonde hair, astonished eyes and a pleasing, goofy grin. She stared at her reflection.

“Oh,” she said, “brilliant.”

Change was possible. Change was here. What had she been worrying about just now? No idea. She hit the first button of a navigation sequence.

The console exploded. Just for a moment, the Doctor saw a warning flash onto the monitor screen. Systems crisis. Multiple operation failures. Was there actually something wrong with the TARDIS? What had caused this?

“What have you done?” Mr Gold asked, as he managed to make his way to the console.

The Professor followed. “We need to reach the console,” he demanded. “Now!”

But they all couldn’t have another moment to think about it. The TARDIS spun violently, sending its inhabitants slamming to the ground. The Doctor watched as the gravity went wild, her library shelves falling off the upper deck. She grabbed for the vents in the floor panel and managed to hold on as it went from  being a floor to a vertical wall.

Suddenly. The ship’s doors flew open. The atmosphere inside the ship flew outward. Clara looked behind her. One hand on the railing. The other holding Ellie. “We’re somewhere!” She exclaimed. She was right. They were thankfully not in the Time Vortex.

The Doctor, however, couldn’t hold onto anything against  this new force grabbing at her coattails. She flew towards the doorway. Her feet hit the edge of it as she desperately flailed to grab hold of something ... anything! Until she felt something grab on to her.

It was Mr Gold. He reached down to grab at her hand as he held onto another railing. “I’ve got you, Doctor.” He looked down at her, but as he did, it brought back memories. Painful memories. Memories of him, his son and the Professor by a portal. He was holding on to Bae tightly – not wanting him to go through the portal. But he let go. No. Not again.

But the pull of gravity was too strong for them. For everyone. The Doctor looked back to look at the console. Fire burst up the centre column, cracking as it went. The tremendous energies of the TARDIS were about to -!

Light and sound erupted into everyone’s faces and they flew backwards, like an arrow, towards the door. They all fell through the doors, like one of the billions of pieces of paper that were falling around them.  Behind them, through the police box doors, the Doctor saw a fireball erupting, consuming everything inside. The light on the top of the box began to flash urgently, and the sound of the TARDIS’s departure roared before the blast could leap out of it and consume them – consume everything.

The TARDIS vanished.

The Doctor fell. Everyone fell. The Professor. Clara Oswald. Ellie Rose Oswald. And Mr Gold. Their arms were cartwheeling, as they fell towards a city of lights below them.

It was just them now, in this terrifying second. Without a TARDIS. Without a saviour. Without Storybrooke. Without Belle. Falling from what must be several thousand feet. Towards a completely unknown destination.

Towards the future.