#oh also I'm going to try and add image descriptions to all of these :] starting now since I know my handwriting is awful LMAO

[scucouncil-doodles]

ask for da bois (/genderneutral): their sleep schedule?

gods don't really need sleep tbh

(more specific thoughts I have are just that condi does tend to go long periods of time without sleeping just because of getting wrapped up in projects, charlie and bizly are pretty similar in that they don't really tend to sleep a full night but it's not unlikely to find them curled up in some weird nook somewhere, and grizzly actually sleeps the most like a normal person since they'll sleep at night and also take naps! but just generally they suffer when they have to go back to mortal sleep schedules for any reason LOL)

[dotster001]

For Tuna:Blackmail End

A/N: for those who asked if I was still doing endings to "for tuna"....yes. I know it's been a while, but I'm slow and have depression! I'm sorry 😭

Part One Part Two Part Three Choose another ending

"Congratulations Leona! Don't blow this."

"It's dishonorable," Jack muttered as he listened to Grim and Leona outside the door.

"Heh, yeah," Ruggie said, not really listening. 

So you were going to end up with Leona, huh? He had his suspicions, Leona had to be one of the wealthier students at this school, but it didn't make the sting any less.

Grim was smart. Whatever story he would spin, you'd no doubt fall for.

"I gotta go," Ruggie muttered, walking away from the door.

"Ruggie," Jack called after him, but he didn't want to listen to what the goody two shoes freshman had to say.

He needed to clear his head. He'd never have been able to be with you. He didn't deserve you, and even if he did, he couldn't support you. Not when he was already supporting his granny, and all the kids in his area. You certainly were also capable of working and helping to support him and his family, but legally, you didn't exist in this world. It would be hard.

Especially if Leona rescinded his invitation to continue working for him after graduation. Which he would, if Ruggie "stole you".

Ruggie realized he had wandered himself over to the courtyard. He sat under a tree, leaning back with a groan. He rubbed his tired eyes, trying to get the image of you on Leona's arm out of his head.

"Ruggie!" 

Man, he must be hallucinating. You were burned in his mind, and in his ears, apparently.

He felt someone standing in front of him, and cracked open an eye. You were smiling at him excitedly.

"Can't you see I'm trying to rest?" He snickered.

You rolled your eyes. "You hang out way too often with Leona."

"Well he is my esteemed employer," he laughed. His eyes flicked over to your hands. "Whatcha got there?"

"Oh! They're dandelions. Before you come at me, they're seeding, it's too late to eat them."

"Then why are you holding them? And so gently, may I add."

You gently, slowly, handed him a seeding dandelion. Then you sat down next to him.

"Blow on it. Make a wish."

"Huh?"

"Just trust me! This is one of the only ways we can do magic where I come from!"

He sighed, but you looked so earnest. So he made a silent wish, and blew on the dandelion, just as you did the same.

"So what did you wish for?" You asked sweetly. He opened his mouth, but you grinned wickedly. "Just kidding! You can't tell me, or it won't come true!"

He rolled his eyes. "That's not how magic works. Besides, my wish is never going to come true anyway."

"Not with that attitude!"

"Not with any attitude. It isn't going to happen."

He leaned against the tree again. You sat quietly, scrutinizing him.

"Well, I wished for a man."

Ruggie snorted at your abrupt change in attitude.

"Any particular man? Remember, if you tell me it won't come true. Shi hi hi."

"Oh hush," you snorted. "Let's see, he's kind."

So not Leona, Ruggie thought with an internal, evil snicker.

"Someone who'd help me fix the dorm, even if he's already super busy. Someone who goes out for a snack, and comes back with a dessert that tastes like sardines. Someone who accidentally started my cat son on a pointless quest to find me a wealthy bachelor so that he can earn mine and Grim's love with tuna."

Ruggie blinked a couple times, slowly mulling over the clear description of himself.

"Huh."

"Yeah. Huh. Still not a wish that's gonna come true?"

He bit his lip, looking off into the distance.

"It can't come true," he tried to sound calm, but he couldn't ignore the bitter tint to his words.

You stiffened. "Oh. Any particular reason why?"

"I can't support you, Y/N. You deserve the world. And I can't give it to you."

"Well, you're thinking super far ahead. I won't even graduate until a year after you. Plus, I don't need supported. I'm a big kid. I can work."

"You deserve the world," he repeated, looking over at you with palpable heartbreak in his eyes. "And my one chance to give it to you will go away once we're together."

"Dude, you're completely losing me. What the fuck are you on about?" You raised a brow.

"Leona offered me basically a lifetime gig with him after graduation. But he's as in love with you as I am. And he's not exactly the most reasonable dude on the planet."

"So you love me too?" 

He rolled his eyes. "That's what you got from that? Of course I love you! I wouldn't fix your shoddy building for free, now would I? I'm not that good a person."

"Sure you are," you said softly as you pushed a stray piece of hair off his face.

"You're missing the point! Leona-"

"The Ruggie I know wouldn't be worried about the jealous anger of a kitty cat who isn't even dating me," you said sternly, and his mouth snapped shut. Logically, you were right. But-

"The Ruggie I know, would join me as I take a trip to Savannahclaw with the intention of blackmailing his ridiculously wealthy housewarden, so he can keep his job and date his true love."

He couldn't even remember the trip, or how it got to this specific point, but damn, were you sexy snapping at Leona about this.

"And another thing!"

"Sevens, shut up, herbivore. You're hurting my head," Leona groaned tiredly. "And my heart. Do you really think I'm this cruel?"

"Huh?" You seemed just as startled as Ruggie felt.

"Sevens, you clearly love the guy. Just cause I'd definitely treat you better, doesn't mean that I'm an ass who would punish Ruggie if you both feel the same way about each other."

He gave a pointed glare at Ruggie. "Does he feel the same way about you?"

Ruggie nodded quickly.

"There. I'm not a monster. You're a good worker, it'd be stupid to lose you over something like this. Just be careful," Leona snickered, and leaned in close, his eyes predatory, his smile smug, "you slip up, I'm going to be right there."

"Fair enough, shi hi hi," Ruggie extended a hand to Leona, the both of them participating in a handshake.

"Sevens, you two are so difficult to understand," you muttered. Ruggie turned towards you with a grin.

"Now that I have my future secured, you wanna know my wish?"

"What was it?" You asked, clearly having a guess.

He stepped close to you, nuzzling his nose against yours. "You promise it'll come true?"

You hummed.

"I wished for a box of a dozen donuts."

You turned on your heel, stalking away, and he laughed after you. "Obviously I wished for you!"

"Whatever, Ruggie."

He chased after you gleefully, for once looking forward to the future.

Tag list-@shytastemakerthing @stygianoir @leonia0 @lleoll @eccedentesiast-sapphic @supertmntgirl @cxsmicdustdreams @aethermostbeloved @krystalkiller25 @asmallbean3 @theneurodivergentdummy @candlewitch-cryptic @smilingfox22-blog @phantomgaming1920 @the-dumber-scaramouche @noidonothavetimeforthis @bontensbabygirl @xxoomiii @somany-fandoms-solittle-time @bre99 @stupidsimp @sus0daddy @a-small-tyrant @imlost-sendhelp @mizukiblogs @neech @kazumify @owlisbuffering

[loryn-art]

Oh no here she comes again with the fanfict she will never write=

Okay, I'm in the middle of a mess, trying to organize my first draft. I managed to write a short summary and a full synopsis, using the Snowflake method, and for now, I'd say it actually works.

Read more bellow if you dare.

I wanted to share with you my first Character sheets tests, (because I'm stupidly proud of it) but also, if you're in the same situation and looking for a model; here is mine. It's a mix of different results I found through many Youtube channels and google, and some of my own ideas.

The Snowflake method helps you to prepare your story step by step, starting from a simple sentence resuming your plot to a full detailed synopsis. Plus, creating your characters profiles. You can find many videos about it on Youtube, (I really had fun making this, but it might to not suit you as all writers have different way to work.) There is a full part on how to write your character description, but this is where I took some liberties;

I found all of the pictures on Pinterest, except for Lucas' face. I used the Artbreeder app, and with the few free credits I had, I somehow managed to mix two images to have a close result, then edited it on Procreate.

There is no spoilers in those descriptions, you can read them safely. (If you're ever interested in my story ^^)

The steps :

Some infos about your characters, size, eyes color, hair color, peculiar details of their bodies, fears, ect...

A short summary of their story and current status.

Their concrete goal, or what they want to do.

Their abstract goal, or why they want to do it. (those part can be tricky to discern, so I just asked myself what are they doing in the story, and then why.)

What is preventing them to reach this goal, external or mental obstacles, burdens and conflicts with themselves or with another element/character, past traumas ect...

How your characters are going to evolve to reach they goal, what kind of person they will become and what they have to do to get there. What they are going to learn through the story.

The status, alive or deceased at the end of the story. Add a short description in the second case. (I voluntary erased my answer here to avoid spoilers ! )

A page about whatever makes you think about your character. Think about details you haven't written in the description, but also ambiances, or even memories.

Remember that I'm a beginner/casual writer, maybe this isn't the best way to create your characters but I found this very fun to do and constructive. It helped me to think a lot about their personalities and choices, impacting the plot.

Feel free to give it a try, and share your results, changes, or even advice !

Thanks for reading ! And good luck for your projects !

[ghostlyclementiny]

Welcome Home update guide!

My sister and I have spent literal hours combing through the site and have found so much!

This is a guide to all of the hidden links! I've also done my best to tell you how to find them yourself (I had so much doing the bug hunt)

I have tried my best to keep all descriptions spoiler free, so if you just want help finding them this is the guide for you!

!!LONG POST!!

!!PLEASE BE AWARE!! The bugs/drawings do not pop up as soon as you open the page! They show up a few seconds afterwards! Please be Patient!

The bug links 🐛

Tape 1- Poppy and Howdy (Bug found on the Live Interview Audio Segment on the Media Page)

Tape 2- Sally and Poppy (Bug found scurrying at the top of the Exhibition Page, it runs off screen but you are still able to click the tiny green bit still sticking out)

Tape 3- Howdy and Sally (Bug found on the top right of the 4th page of The Guestbook)

Tape 4- Barnaby and Frank (Bug found on the Whats Welcome Home Page next to the gallery)

Tape 5- Barnaby and Eddie (Bug found on the Transcripts Page on the left side of the catchphrases section)

Tape 6- Julie and Frank (Bug found on the Currently Unknown Records section of the Merchandise Page)

Tape 7- Eddie and Julie (Bug found invading the Guestbook on 'zip's entry)

Tape 8- Eddie and Frank (Bug found under the flag of Eddie's post office on His Introduction Page)

Tape 9- Frank and Poppy (Bug found on the right side of the directory from The Neighborhood Page)

Tape 10- Julie and Sally (Bug on the bottom right of the About Us Page)

Tape 11- Julie and Barnaby (Spider on the top right of the Stickers Page)

Tape 12- Howdy and Barnaby (Bug found snoozing at the top right of the News Page)

Tape 13- Howdy and Eddie (Bug found at the top right of the Guestbook Home Page)

Tape 14- Barnaby and Howdy (Bug found in one of the Coded Links from the out of place letters over the site)

We also managed to decode the message in the audio links!

These links were found hidden in gifs that were being drawn! (I can't find better words to describe it sorry ^^;;)

(I tried to add locations of the gifs, but as mentioned above, we have been doing this for hours with no stop.. I will try to update this at a later point with more gifs)

I (Found on the Welcome Home Page, a drawing of Home in the blank space next to Wally)

understand (Found on the Exhibition Page, a drawing of Home on the bottom left next to Poppy)

Neighbor (Found underneath Home in So Below, a drawing of a spiral underneath Wally)

I (Found on the Stickers Page, a star on the header message of the page)

will (Found on the Whats Welcome Home Page, 2 flowers on the right blank side of Eddie)

Help (Found on the Whats Welcome Home Page, a yellow flower on the left blank side of Eddie)

find (Found on the Guestbook Home Page on the right side of Wally)

You

a (Found on the About Us Page, 3 Hearts starting from the 'Who are you?' question)

way

soon (Found on the 404 Error Page, 5 stars drawn across the screen)

Will

Vault and Password

..I'm not going to lie my sister found these and I don't know how [:

Crack The Code, a bunch of hints toward the password. (to get to Password Please just click on the image)

Password Please, to get to the enter password section just click on the image.

The password is found via finishing the Worksheet in the gallery of the Exhibition Page,

The password is the first letter of each answer, spelling out BSPJW (it does have to be capitalized, that was heart breaking to find out after putting so much effort into a hard answer...)

The gallery on the Staff Only Page has a lot of hard to read documents, but most of them will give you a description upon hovering your mouse over them.

And that's it :D that is all the knowledge I'm able to share, if I find more information I will for sure update this! Oh and please please take a look though the site! This project is such a masterpiece and has passion that you can see at every corner!!!

and before I forget! if you have anything to add to this please do! there were a few links that I wasn't able to find again ;-;

[utilitycaster]

On character design, what are your thoughts on there being official art? Not the art itself, though if you have thoughts please share, but for example, my own opinion is that while it's a good tool and help for cosplay and nice as a base for artists to use when drawing, I feel like it stifles a lot of creativity. When you have a "correct" template to follow it's so much rarer to see any designs that don't match up, and if they do they easily fall into samey stuff or stereotypes like characters that are infantilised being chubby or having big round glasses (as was mentioned with Imogen and Jester). I think it'd be really cool to see what all the talented artists in this fandom would do with character design if there wasn't anything but descriptions as to what characters looked like (I've seen one person do that and it's easily some of my favourite c3 art out there). With official art it just sort of feels like every piece of fanart ends up being a bit of a dtiys of the characters. Imagine how many cool robot designs of FCG there'd be for example, since that is a race that really lends itself to unique designs as it doesn't follow the humanoid forms everyone else has. I think it'd also lend itself more to small variations that end up happening during sessions, like imogen being blue or bald. And while I'm not sure if she started wearing them, Fearne got those glasses of charming people and I don't think I've seen any art of her wearing any yet

This is going to sound pretty harsh, but: I like having official art, and I like seeing other people's interpretations within the bounds of that art but a lot of "interpretations" go into the realm of "literally an OC" and often in ways that are like...actively worse. I've seen multiple people try to tone down Ashton's obnoxious outfit or draw his hair as regular hair rather than purple crystal and it's like "literally just make your own character at this point, who is this bargain-basement imitator that you captioned with Ashton's name."

Like...I recognize this sounds rich coming from me, a person who can just about draw a stick figure, but if someone wants to draw creative aeormatons...no one is stopping them, but at the same time, FCG is a yellow robot with a sort of cylindrical head and big blue glassy eyes, with an image of some blades of grass on their chest, and that's what they look like and if you draw something else I'm just like "maybe make an original character then? If you say it's Aeormaton concept art you can even still tag it as Critical Role in good faith."

It's also worth noting: I don't reblog a ton of NADDPod or TAZ art, but those are both fandoms that by and large haven't had very prominent official art (at least not until TAZ Balance's graphic novels). The following two things have happened pretty often:

The art still is largely all very much the same - which, I should point out, I don't mind! I mind when people all do the same thing and I think that thing sucks, but like, you can look at my blog and see tons of reblogs of renditions of Imogen looking largely the same throughout (ie, very similar to the official depiction), but they're interesting and enjoyable for reasons of composition and art style. I have a stronger musical background than visual arts, and the idea with music(unless you're doing like, improvisational jazz) is that you add your own self-expression through the interpretation, but you are still largely hitting the same notes as anyone else, and I don't think that's a bad thing! I think it shows judgment and talent to work within parameters in a way that is still unique to you. Toddlers can easily scribble outside the box and frequently do. It takes some skill to actually add something inside the box that makes people go "oh hey I never saw the box that way."

People get, shall we say, self-righteous and terrible. I think representation in art is important, but this is where you get headcanon depictions being treated as canon, and then, if canon art comes out later and conflicts with that hc depiction, a certain segment of people start bringing out the accusations of bigotry and the creators are like "literally I was just hanging out". I've mentioned how absolutely bugfuck people got about Taako having blue-green skin. I also love NADDPod but people who complained about the lack of diversity in CR often touted NADDPod, a show that is also entirely made up of cis white people over 30, as some shining unproblematic example; at least part of this was, in my opinion, because there was no official depiction of the characters and therefore people felt more validated in their headcanon depictions - there isn't, actually, any more representation. (This is not the only reason why this happened, nor should "fandoms having some obnoxious people in them" be a reason for creators to do anything ever, but, on a practical level...having official fan art is my preference).

I guess the tl;dr is: if you truly want to let your creativity roam free...why have you chosen the medium of "art based on an existing work." I say this as someone who writes fanfic - it's great! It's fun! Also if I wanted to write a story that deviates significantly from how the characters are depicted in that work, I would write original fiction rather than a fan work.

[charliedawn]

Imagine being send to the Maze and being childhood friends of Newt and Gally (Part 1)

The first thing you notice when you open your eyes are the bright red lights, blinding you momentarily as you seem to go further up. You try to look around for anything that you may use as a weapon and are relieved to find a hammer. At least, you wouldn't be defenseless..You wait until the elevator stops completely before hiding underneath a nearby cover. You soon hear the doors open and see multiple feet entering the cage to take the crates. However, a certain pair of feet stops just in front of you and, without a warning, snatches the cover from above your head.

" What the..?!"

But you don't let the boy finish his sentence before taking the hammer out and knocking him out to get out. Some of the boys try to stop you, but you run faster and climb up the only place you know where you can be safe. The tower. You climb up as fast as you can and threaten anyone that would climb up would feel your wrath. Alby tries to talk to you, but your only answer is a banana in his face..However, after a few minutes, you say that you will not get down until you've talked to those named Gally and Newt. The two men look at each other with a slight frown, not understanding why the weird girl would want to talk to them. They still oblige and climb the stairs with caution. When they reach the top, you are huddled in a corner and look at them with suspicious narrowed eyes.

" Are you Gally and Newt ?"

Newt nods before crouching in front of you with a kind smile.

" Yes. I'm Newt, and this is Gally..Now, mind telling us who you are and how you know us ?"

You bite you lower lip hesitantly before finally admitting.

" Because, I knew you..My name is Lace, and I was your friend."

Their eyebrows both shot up in surprise and you lower your hammer. You want to get out something from your inner pocket, but Gally is quick and grabs your upper arm with a worried frown. You raise your hands in surrender and he is the one that takes out the thing you wanted to show them. A picture. A picture with three kids surrounded by their parents. A family picture. Newt looks at the picture as well and looks up at you with incomprehension. You understand and quickly explains.

" It's us. It's been a long time of course but, I never gave up hope that I would find you. I had to work very hard to get here and not get my memory zapped like everyone else. But, it was definitely worth it.."

You hug Newt that seems dumbfounded for a moment, but wraps his arms around you tentatively as well. Gally, still clutching the picture in his hand, eyes you warily, unsure as to trust you or not. You feel his hesitation and decide not to hug him..yet. However, Newt is curious and asks when you've taken a step back.

" W..Who were we ? Who were our parents ? I have so many questions.."

You laugh at his obvious enthusiasm and you nod understandingly.

" Of course. And I'll answer every one of them. Gally, you are the son of two marins and you spent most of your life on a boat. You parents were nice and hard-working people. While you, Newt, are the son of a bookshop owner and a gardener. I never met such lovely people and so gentle..They were very good people. You can be proud. They fought very hard to protect you."

Newt smiles proudly and his eyes fill with tears at you description, while Gally stares at you with his permanent frown..They hadn't changed. Even with the world turning to chaos, they had managed to stay the same as you remembered them..

" And we're supposed to believe that ?! For all we know, this could be a trap. You could be a trap. This image could be fake and everything you just said may just end up being a big lie.."

Gally, always the cautious one..You sigh and walk towards Gally that arks an eyebrow and takes a step forward, as if to prove that he isn't afraid of you. However, you only smile up at him before taking him surprisingly by the ear to yank him forward.

" Gally. I've spent the last 6 years searching for you. So, I don't give a thing if you believe me or not. I'm gonna make you two leave this place even if it's the last thing I do..I won't wait for a griever or whatever abomination there is out there get to you. I'm going to save you, that you want it or not. Got it, Mister Grumpyface ?"

Newt wants to intervene, but you glare at him with such intensity that he doesn't dare cross you. You then return to Gally that is red with anger and embarrassment. If looks could kill..Well, you would be very dead. Fortunately, you know that Gally has trouble with hitting girls..So he wouldn't hurt you. Possibly. However, he slaps your hand away and walks away, mumbling to himself about how you will be the end of everything.

Newt stands by you side and sighs at the reaction of his friend.

" Sorry about him..He'll come around eventually."

You smile and nod before looking at the knife on the floor.

" So, you're positive that everyone here is safe ? You're safe ?"

You ask with concern and he nods with a small reassuring smile.

" We are. Well..As safe as one can get in the Labyrinth that is."

You nod again understandingly before looking at the huge walls ahead. Instinctively, you grab Newt's hand and promise him.

" I'll get you out of here..And I'll make sure that W.I.C.K.E.D never finds you again."

He frowns, pondering for a moment before his face lights up and he asks excitedly.

" Wait..You know W.I.C.K.E.D ?! You're like Tommy then !"

You frown in incomprehension and Newt takes your hand to guide you towards the ladder.

" Come on. There's someone you should meet."

You trust him and get down as well. You follow him, trying to ignore all of the odd stares that the rest of the group is giving you. You arrive in a little hut where a dark-haired boy is looking at the runners at a map. You automatically recognize him and freeze. Newt turns his head towards you with a small frown.

" Are you okay ?"

But you don't answer and only start walking towards the boy and embracing him in front of everyone, crying. You then whisper in his ear.

" Thank you.."

Thomas doesn't know how to react and looks at Newt for an explanation, but Newt is as surprised as him. Sensing his discomfort, you take a step back and laugh awkwardly while wiping your tears away.

" Sorry..You..You told me how to get in. I thought they had killed you.."

He doesn't understand, but then another voice rise up.

" Y/N ?!"

You look in the direction of the voice and find..Oh God no..Theresa. You glare at her with crossed arms and gritted teeths. Of course, she would follow Thomas in Hell if it meant helping W.I.C.K.E.D. Before anyone can stop you, you take a nearby knife and try to attack her. However, Gally is there to grab your hand and twist your arm. You let go of the knife while him and some other guys drag you away. However, you still scream at Thomas and Newt.

" Don't trust her ! She'll kill us all !"

You are locked in some kind of pit and Gally closes it while glancing at you.

" You shouldn't have done that..You nearly broke one of the rules.."

Gally tells you finally and you look up at him with surprise.

" What rules ?"

His eyes widen in surprise.

" Newt didn't tell you ?"

You shake your head negatively and he sighs loudly before answering you.

"There are three rules you must follow in order to stay.

Never go outside the Glade, unless you are a Runner.

Never hurt another Glader. We have to trust each other.

Everyone does their part. No slackers.

You tried to hurt Theresa. But, since you didn't know the rules. I suppose they'll let it slide.."

However, he doesn't seem too happy about that last part. You decide not to push it and ask him instead.

" You don't want to know anything about your old life, why ?"

He seems to hesitate before answering truthfully.

" Because I'm afraid to know why they send me away.."

You frown. Send him away ? You are about to answer him when he takes back his serious face and adds almost spitefully.

" And I don't trust you."

That is more understandable. He looks one last time at you before walking away.

" I'll come search for you tomorrow morning."

You don't respond and wait until the light of his torch is far enough before taking out a small wooden horse with a small smile.

" I did it, mom..I found them. I'll find him also, I promise."

You kiss the small object before putting it back around your neck. You look up and smile as you see the stars shining up there. In the city, you couldn't see the stars because of the many building in the capital..But here ? You feel free. You were maybe trapped in a pit, but you feel more free than you've ever been in the city. You start laughing to yourself and start dancing in the pit, unaware that you have some spectators.

" What is she doing ?!"

Chuck asks Thomas, confused. But Thomas is as confused as him, while Newt can't help but laugh a little beside them. They both look at him with widened eyes and Newt finally answers with a small smile.

" Isn't it obvious ? She's dancing."

[moons-and-stars-and-shit]

Oh I've been waiting for this moment hihihi. so may a request a 🍰

Appearance:

Not really too much to brag about but... i’m 5’2, toned skin, medium brown hair( still have some green remnants)slim body thin waist + pretty marked hip (one of the parts of my body that i really like ) but oddly thick thighs. Dark brown eyes and small but still full lips.

Style / Aesthetic :Don't know exactly how to describe this, but most of the time I work with grunge,dark academia and vintage, but often you can see me in cotagecore and glam chic outfits. or a big mix of this

Personality:

I’m a taurus, Libra rising and Sag moon , ESFP,Love to make new friends and i can be pretty talkative...principally if we talking about art, music , cooking , animes or sports .I’m a ravenclaw ,I can be really stubborn but I'm trying to work on this, people also say i have short temper, but i can't believe this.Teasing sarcastic and flirty are some adjectives I can add to my personality description, it is actually so natural that i probably do without notice. I can be a really crackhead sometimes, especially when I'm with my friends, but mostly I try to use the reason . I can be pretty clingy to my close friends and family. Also I can be pretty random, being my friend means that you will receive some messages/ videos at 3 AM or even get a new playlist in full Tuesday :)

Hobbies and random stuff :

I love cooking / baking i actually have a “brand ” of homemade biscuits (family’s recipe), I can play volleyball and badminton and i normally do this with my friends(in the end of High school i played almost everyday ) and now i’m planing play for my university’s team. I really like to listen to music , and I'm doing this 24/7( I kind of have a server on discord just for the music bot ). I actually can speak 3 languages and I'm working on the 4th one but i’m never trust my skills before sending a text in another language !!. I can actually be both or too energetic or a totally lazy bitch. but i’m probably always up to talking/ listening. I really like flowers ( I love learning about their meaning), and poetry , also writing and reading even though I've not been doing this lately.

Fun fact my favorite color is white but 85% of my wardrobe is black .

I really like make up and i love do it , but i have so me block with eyeliners i just can't do it right

About Relationships :

My love language is Quality time, so just being able to relax next each other (friends / s/o) with no words being necessary for meIt's already enough, oh i can get a little too touchy sometimes since I really like to cuddle. I love adventures, visiting new places, shopping, nature dates, stargazing, board games/ cards nights. I really like to innovate, as long as i have a good company I think I can do almost everything.

Ahhhh Lecxi, yours matchups are the best, i just love the way you write so much ,it's a muah *chef kiss*

@lilshortcakess

A/N- This took SO long and I am SO sorry 🥲 but I hope you still enjoy it my dear!

Romantic Matchup

𝐎𝐢𝐤𝐚𝐰𝐚 𝐓𝐨𝐨𝐫𝐮

𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐘𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐌𝐞𝐭

So you were on Seijous girls volleyball team

And you met Oikawa because well...

Ya’ll kept practicing overtime 😅

Now we’ll just say that you wanted to practice your spikes

and for that, you would need a setter

And Oikawa wanted to practice his sets

For him to do that he would need a spiker

So ya’ll were just like “hey let's just practice together

Now every time there was practice

When everyone left

You would meet up with Oikawa so that you two could practice

This went on for a while before Oikawa decided on getting to know you on a more personal level

I mean if he was going to be practicing with you he might as well get to know you right?

So he started taking you out to eat after you two finished practicing

Sometimes he would take you to a diner

Sometimes it would just be a gas station

But either way, you two would end up just sitting and talking to each other

This is how Oikawa found out how much he actually liked you

We’ll get into why later 👀

Anyways after falling into this little routine he started to hang out with you during school hours

Damn, he was really just weaseling his way into your life, isn't he?

He would only realize he had a crush on you when Iwa pointed it out

So at this point, he was just like fuck it

YOLO am I right?

So he just casually asked you out when he took you to a gas station after practice

Romantic I know

But he was over the moon when you said yes!

And ya’ll have been dating ever since

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐀𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐘𝐨𝐮

He loves that you just listen to him

Like you GENUINELY listen to him

He's found that not a lot of people care what he's saying outside of volleyball

But you listen to anything and everything he talks about

And you show interest too!

This was the thing that made him realize that he liked you

Ok he REALLY loves your flirty nature

Just the fact that instead of getting flustered at his flirty comments

You just pop off with your own comment

He loves someone who can match his energy

He really likes that your clingy 👀

Whenever you hold him or ask him for cuddles

it just makes him feel wanted and loved

𝐅𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐓𝐨 𝐃𝐨 𝐓𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫

Ok so just addressing the elephant in the room

He loves to play volleyball with you

He calls it a good “bonding” activity

Now that THAT'S out of the way

He likes to bake with you

He has even made recipes personalized to him

For example

“Oikawa's Milk Bread Biscuits”

Yup

He took your biscuit recipe

And turned it into a milk bread

He likes to listen to music with you

I feel like he hates awkward or uncomfortable silence

So he always has SOME kind of music playing 

And finally

He loves to talk to you

Granted it's a lot of him talking and you listening

But if you're feeling down and need someone to talk to 

He's all ears

𝐑𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐦 𝐇𝐜

One time you and Oikawa were practicing overtime

And Iwa came into the gym and yelled at you both for “overworking yourselves”

You and Oikawa actually sell his milk bread biscuits at school

Get that coin sis 🤑

You and Oikawa just throw random pick up lines at each other

and i cant get the image of him doing finger guns at you every single time 444

He gets really mad when you start speaking a different language

Cause he cant understand you!

So sometimes you just switch languages to piss him off :)

Causing him to learn the basic phrases of the languages you can speak

𝐀𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐲

When Taurus and Cancer come together in a love affair, it’s usually a very good combination.

They are two positions apart within the Zodiac, and such Signs tend to share karmic ties and a deep mutual understanding.

These particular two Signs have much in common

Both prize security in a love relationship above almost all else

both tend to be nurturers

Cancer is emotionally nurturing

while Taurus loves to spoil their lover with sensual delights, gifts and good, rich meals

They’re both quite domestic and love a quiet night spent at home with their sweetie.

The Taurus-Cancer partnership tends to be a happy one due to this mutual enjoyment of the security and comfort of home.

They love a solid home base

a strong relationship

nice possessions

good food

all the comforts of domestic life.

Theirs is often the ideal family that people of other Signs strive for, with strong ties between them and a relationship that is family-oriented rather than toward the outside world.

Their only major problems arise when Taurus insists on having its own way and Cancer responds by sulking.

Taurus must understand Cancer’s emotional sensitivity, and Cancer needs rely on open, honest communication than on emotional blackmail.

The steady, reliable team they make.

Both Signs are dependable and nurturing, strongly oriented toward domestic life together.

A mutual love of home and security makes theirs an ideal long-term, family relationship.

𝐎𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐀𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐜

𝐁𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐬 💋

[pomrania]

Okay, I'm awake now, lemme explain what was going on.

So @maniculum is doing an event where they share old bestiary descriptions of a creature, giving it a nonsense name as a filler, and people are drawing what they can from that description. I missed doing it last week, due to a combination of just plain forgetting and then being too ashamed to look at it later on, but I didn't want to miss it again. That's half of why I worked on it when I was so tired yesterday, so I wouldn't forget; the OTHER half is that when tired, I don't overthink things (thus I'm more likely to get stuff DONE instead of blankly staring at the screen trying for perfection), plus I come up with dumb ideas unfiltered by rational thought, which I thought would add to the experience and end result.

This one is a "holghras", and you can find the description of it here. I've an idea of what it might actually be, but that didn't interfere since I can't accurately draw ANY bird from memory other than mayybe a barn owl in one particular pose, and also it's been like twenty years since I last saw the bird I was reminded of by the description, so I wouldn't even be able to recognize that bird if I saw a photo of it.

I started with the beak. It's twisted because of the "deceitful" description, and yes that doesn't make biological sense but it makes EMOTIONAL sense, at least to me when half-asleep. The "ears" (which really should be tufts of feathers, if I end up drawing this properly) come from the bit about "the young hearing the mother", even though that wasn't a major element in the description, I was tired and that's the kind of weird connections I was HOPING to make. "The young being carried" is literally in the description; while awake I can think of other ways that might happen, but "on the back" was the only thing an occurred to me at the time.

I was working from the mental image of a small bird, one that gets seen on the ground; I don't know much of that got across, because I have not yet learned how to draw birds well. For the tail, I was thinking "what's the sluttiest way a bird's tail feathers could look", and COMPLETELY forgot about a bunch of birds' tails, so I ended up with "the outer feathers are longer than the main feathers".

Okay, that's everything with the lines, now on to the colours. With the exception of the light brown, these are all from the default palette of the program I use, because that's simpler; no real meaning to any specific variant of a shade. "Overall some kind of brown" is because, well, that describes a decent chunk of creatures. The lighter shade around the eye and on the underside, no meaning to those, other than that they're very common and also they look cool. The beak and the legs were me just trying to remember what were the normal colours for birds. For the young, there was a thing of "they lie on their back and hold up bits of earth to camouflage themselves", and I legit don't remember how that translated into me thinking "oh so they must be light brown as juveniles".

The tail being purple, that was me thinking again "what would a slutty bird look like"; if I was to do a better version of this, I'd have the colours being more vivid and distinct in comparison to the rest of the body. As for the wing, the pale bars on it don't mean anything, just "I want to add something in here, and I remember that birds have markings like this". The red, the description talks about how they pretend to be injured, and that immediately came to mind; the implementation was a bit off, because half-asleep, but I'd stick with the idea.

I don't know if I'll do a drawn-while-fully-awake version of this; I mean I INTEND to, but "I don't control the motivation" and all that. Aside from things I'd mentioned above, and overall drawing something not as messy, I think I'd want to change the beak, because dream logic just seems silly when I'm looking at it awake, plus there are SO many weird bird beaks I could choose from that are actually physically possible. Maybe do something to fancy up the tail feather a bit. To get a better picture, it'd be a good idea to have a more interesting pose; however, that's likely beyond the combination of "my current ability" and "the amount of time and effort I'd want to put into the thing".

I missed the thing last week, so I'm doing this week's one now. I am tired, brain half asleep, thus not good at being clarification; but I drew this, on whatever stupid connection my brain could manage, if an idea came to me I was like "sure why not, let's go with that".

The whole thing is that we're given a translated bestiary description, and to draw from that. I hope tomorrow when I'm awake full I'll be able to remember why I any given decision.

This is the thing. Tomorrow I intend to write up explain actual, and probably also should to draw anew, neater. My words are not word proper now. Time to post and leave the rest for future me.

This is not the full thing. Not quite an in-progress, unless I mistake and end up not more to do (which I hope not).

[heyyyharry]

My Girl Series: Chapter 7 - Birthday Blues

…in which Harry tries to make it up to Y/N for all the birthdays he has missed.

Series description: Y/N falls in love with the older boy next door who doesn’t feel the same, years later they meet again at a funeral.

AU: actor!harry, older!harry, younger!y/n; (4-year age gap)

Chapter 6: This Time - Y/N needs a wedding date, and this time Harry’s not giving up.

wattpad link

.

After Harry had left Holmes Chapel, every spark of joy in Y/N's life slowly died out with the part of him inside of her. The day she turned fifteen was also the first time she'd spent a birthday alone. Celine was abroad for a three-month exchange program. Her grandma, who lived in Brighton had just passed away, so both of her parents had to go there for the funeral. Since she refused to come along, they left her home with her mother's younger sister, aunt Lynn, who was only twenty-two at the time and didn't even bother to remember her name.

"Sweet baby, do not tell your parents that I invite some friends over, okay? Your mum is gonna be so mad," the young woman said, holding Y/N by the shoulders and the teenage girl could only pay attention to the sound of her aunt chewing bubble gum. For some reasons, Lynn always had something in her mouth. If she wasn't chewing gum, she had to make sure her mouth was kept busy by eating something, or someone. Y/N had met her three times before but each time she was snogging a different guy. Sadly she was the only option for a 'babysitter', just because Y/N's parents didn't believe their fifteen-year-old daughter was capable of staying home alone.

"But today is—"

"Shit!" The woman exclaimed, holding her head. "You're right! It's Friday night, I should throw a party. Play with your dolls, baby. Your aunt has adult stuff to take care of."

"My dolls?" Y/N muttered under her breath as the bedroom door was slammed shut in front of her eyes. Putting on her favorite song and turning off all the lights, she lied down, staring at the spinning fan above her head.

All the kids her age probably spent their fifteenth getting drunk and making out with their crushes, or losing their virginity without their parents knowing. But there she was, locked in her room while her aunt was having all the fun she was supposed to have. For the first time in her life, she found herself alone. She'd always been a loner, yet she had never actually felt it until that night. She stayed utter still in silence, holding Thumper close to her chest. The stuffed animal could probably hear every sound of her heart cracking open. Her mother wasn't there to tell her what a woman she'd become, nor was Harry to sing her the birthday song. It was just her, alone in the dark, with a purple bunny that still smelt just like him.

.

.

.

Celine always said that working in the library was the worst decision Y/N had ever made, because there was no job more boring than organizing dusty old books. But the thing was, Y/N loved her boring job. She mainly got paid for sorting and shelving books according to their categorization, which wasn't really hard work, not to mention that Ms. Florence, the librarian, was really easy-going. Y/N got to spend most of her time in the fiction section, avoiding her responsibilities to read and write as much as she wanted. Besides, she really liked her co-worker, whose name was Alice.

Alice was a year younger than Y/N. She liked to talk and Y/N liked to listen, so they were pretty compatible. Finding a drinking buddy in university was easy, Y/N had plenty of them; the hard part was finding a buddy you could trust. So even though Alice wasn't what Y/N would consider a close friend, she could be someone to count on.

"Why is it that every time I see you, you're reading something?"

Alice's voice pulled Y/N's attention away from the novel on her lap, as she looked up and found the tiny brunette smiling at her. Y/N leaned back against the bookshelf, crossing her legs so there was room on the floor for Alice to sit down as well.

"I have a surprise for you, big sis!" Alice said, making Y/N roll her eyes and chuckle.

"You've found another porn book, haven't ya?"

"No! An actual surprise!" The younger girl giggled, then finally showed Y/N what she'd been hiding behind her back. "Ta-da! Two tickets to see Heathers!"

"Heathers The Musical?" Y/N dropped her jaw when the other girl nodded. "I love Heathers!"

"I bet you do! You seem like someone who enjoys dark comedy with tragic endings."

Alice's comment made her laugh, but she couldn't say it wasn't true. Her life itself was already a dark comedy.

"Are you giving me these for free?" She asked, pointing to the tickets and Alice's lips curved into a smile as she nodded fast in response.

"I bought these to go with a friend next week, but we're both gonna be busy that night. So just consider this as my temporary birthday gift to you. I'll buy you something else tomorrow."

"How do you know today's my birthday?" Y/N's eyes went round as her mouth fell open, yet the grin on the other girl's face only expanded.

"I was cleaning Ms. Florence's desk this morning when I found your CV. I didn't have time to actually get you something so—"

"Alice..."

"I know you hate birthdays, but please accept these tickets or else I'll die!"

Y/N rolled her eyes, chuckling a bit at how dramatic that sounded, but eventually, she accepted the birthday gift from her co-worker, and thanked the girl for being so thoughtful. "By the way, there's really no need to get me something else," she said, making Alice snort.

"Don't be silly! You're getting a proper birthday gift from me." Alice barely stood up when she flopped onto the floor again. "Oh, and one more thing! Do you wanna go out tonight? I know this pub that's—"

"No, thanks. I've got a lot of work to do tonight."

"But it's your birthday!"

Y/N gave the girl a shrug, lifting a corner of her mouth as she replied, "I never celebrate it."

"Boo, you suck!" Like a child, Alice blew up her cheeks, eyebrows knitted together. "But if you change your mind, ring me up, big sis!"

Y/N tried to contain her laughter as she watched Alice hop away and almost fall head first when she tripped over a stool. It was only when her clumsy co-worker had gone out of sight that Y/N finally checked her watch and realized her shift was just over. She rose from the floor to place the book back on the shelf, then put the tickets into her bag before heading out. Usually, she would always be the last person to leave, but since it was her birthday, she still wanted to do something special for herself, even if it was something as simple as going home before Ms. Florence.

Instead of taking the bus, that day Y/N decided to walk home. For the first time in two years living in that city, the girl finally paid attention to what was going on around her; it was also the first time she had realized how boring London had always been. The grey color of concrete dominated the entire city; it was hard to spot a hint of green anywhere, unlike Holmes Chapel, her home.

Y/N missed that place so much, now more than ever.

She missed the meadows behind her house at springtime, when all the wildflowers added vibrant colors to the fading green. She missed the tall pine trees surrounding a field full of white poppies. She used to run across that field, imagining herself in the opening scene of The Sound of Music, and she could still hear Harry's voice calling out "Bambi, wait for me!" as he tried to catch up with her.

He was the green that she missed the most.

The sound of her ringtone cut right through that thought, causing the vivid images before her eyes to fade back to monochrome. His name showed up on the screen, as if he knew she had been thinking about him.

"Hello?" She answered, standing close to the wall on her right so she wouldn't get in the way of the other pedestrians.

"Are you on the way home?" Harry asked.

"Yeah, I'm just a few blocks away. Why?"

"I'm coming over."

She snorted, pursing her dry lips. "I'm busy tonight, remember? Birthday dinner with Isaac?" That lie was as smooth as melting butter coming from her mouth, yet her insides were heating up and her hands started to shake. She was glad he couldn't see the way she shut her eyes and pressed her lips into a firm line after lying to him.

"I'll see you in five."

"Wait, I said—" Y/N began, yet couldn't finish. Harry had already hung up on her.

.

.

.

The sun was sinking fast now, turning the sky to grey tinged with purple and pink. Harry was already waiting by his car outside the building when Y/N returned, standing with his back facing the ruby-red skyline. With golden-rays casting down upon him, Y/N thought Harry glowed even brighter than the sun itself. But of course, he didn't have to know.

"Happy birthday." His voice was husky and deep as he handed her a white poppy. "Just like the ones back home," he said, and the reluctance from her expression made him feel the need to add, "I didn't buy it. I stole it from a flower shop on the way here."

Y/N didn't know if that was true, but his slop-sided grin made her doubt every single one of his words.

"Headline: Harry Styles stole a flower for a mystery girl!" She said, swiping her hand across the air like she was presenting the idea to him, which only made the beam on his face grow twice as big as he pointed to his car. "Get in, kid," he told her. "Before what you said become reality."

"Where are we going?" She asked in hesitation.

"To your birthday party."

"My birthday party?! But I'm—"

"I'm sure we've got a lot of time before Isaac returns from Italy to take you to dinner."

That one sentence got Y/N tongue-tied. The girl couldn't make a single sound, instead, she was gawking at him like a fool. What did she expect though? He would find out sooner or later because he was still friends with Isaac. So all she could do at that moment was try to come up with an explanation, in case he asked her to tell him why she'd lied. However, he didn't ask her anything. Harry flashed a smile as he walked back to his car and told her to come along. But Y/N refused. She couldn't just follow him blindly without knowing exactly where they were going.

"You're not taking me to a fancy restaurant, are you?"

"Bambi, the last thing I want is for the paps to eat you alive." Harry chuckled and opened the car door for the girl. "Don't worry, kid. It's just gonna be the two of us."

.

.

.

The loud music and laughter from downstairs made it almost impossible for Y/N to even hear the voice inside her head. The birthday blues made it hard for her to stay awake, yet she couldn't sleep either, and there was no way she could talk her aunt into ending the party. Lynn was probably drunk off her ass right now, so Y/N knew the only place for her to be alone with her depressing thoughts was the treehouse. She hadn't gone back there since the night she last saw Harry, but she guessed it had become such a big part of her that she couldn't stay away no matter how much she'd tried.

Still in her pajamas, the fifteen-year-old climbed the rope ladder to get to her childhood spot. The floor was still wet from the rain yesterday, so she leaned against the doorway and stood there to ponder on her own. However, it didn't take her more than three minutes to burst into tears.

Y/N hated crying, it was physically and emotionally painful to cry, and when it was over, what was left was just...nothing. Emptiness. Nevertheless, crying was how Y/N understood herself best. When she cried, she knew who she was. And she had always thought, just like a heartbreak, though crying left her feeling empty when it was over, she would still sigh in relief, because, at least, she knew it was the end.

"Y/N!"

When she heard that voice, the girl stepped closer to the edge of the treehouse and looked down at her neighbor's garden, where she found Harry's big sister with one hand behind her back and the other waving in the air. Y/N quickly wiped away the remaining tears on her cheeks, feeling thankful because if Gemma had come earlier, she might have already seen Y/N bawling her eyes out.

"Gemma! When did you get back?"

"Just a couple days ago. I'm home for two weeks to work on my thesis." The other Styles chuckled. "Glad I found you out here, I was just about to come over."

"To see me?" Y/N lifted both eyebrows, pointing to herself and receiving a nod from her neighbor.

"Yeah, come down here. I have something for you."

The teenage girl hesitated a bit because she couldn't figure out why Gemma wanted to see her and had something for her. Even though she used to hang out with Harry, she was never that close to his older sister. But she climbed down anyway, curious to know what Gemma had behind her back.

"Happy birthday," said the 23-year-old as she handed Y/N the birthday gift she'd been hiding that whole time.

A snow globe.

It didn't have a snowman and a Christmas tree like the ones you normally found in souvenir shops. The one Gemma gave her had colorful glitter inside instead of fake snow; and it was a miniature London, with tiny versions of Big Ben, the London Eye, and the Tower Bridge.

But all Y/N could see, was a person.

"You remember my birthday?" The younger girl asked quietly as she received the gift from her lovely neighbor, who was smiling from ear to ear.

"Of course," Gemma said. "I came to your birthday party every year. But I guess you don't like them anymore, huh?"

"Yeah..." Y/N faked a laugh, hoping her awkward eye-roll didn't give away the fact that she was just lonely.

"Well, I'd love to stay and chat but I must get back to work now."

"Sure. Thanks for the nice gift," said Y/N. "Where did you get it by the way?"

"Bought it when I was in London last week."

Y/N didn't say anything else and just watched the older girl walk back to her house. Of course, she wanted to ask Gemma about Harry, but it was so sad to even think about him right now. His sister remembered her birthday and even got her a present, yet she hadn't heard a single word from him since the day he left. He was supposed to be her friend, or was it just another thing she had fooled herself into believing?

Holding the little London between her palms, she thought that maybe it was time to let go of the London inside her heart.

.

.

.

"Don't peek!"

"I'm not peeking!"

Y/N giggled, holding the hand that was covering her eyes as Harry carefully led her up the stairs, giving her directions so she wouldn't trip and cause them both to fall over. She extended her arms once they had reached the top, feeling the cold metal surface in front of them. The creaking sound caused her to flinch, so Harry quickly reassured the girl that it was just him opening the door. She could feel his other hand reaching around her waist to pull the handle, and a cold breeze blew right through her thin shirt. Y/N immediately took a step backward and bumped into Harry's firm chest. She felt the pressure of his fingertips on her hip as he gently pushed her forward, for the third time that night, telling her to trust him.

"If I didn't trust you I wouldn't have walked up all these floors with my eyes closed." She giggled, and his soft laughter sent shivers down her spine.

"Sit," he ordered, holding the girl by the arms to guide her into a chair; and when she was finally seated, Harry leaned in so his lips were close to her ear as he whispered, "open your eyes."

Y/N did what she was told.

Slowly, she opened her eyes.

The girl had begun to envision her surroundings ever since the cool air hit her skin for the first time as she stepped out, yet what she saw was far from her imagination.

They were sitting on a rooftop of a tall building somewhere in London. From her spot, Y/N could see the entire city spread below, tiny vehicles rushing along tangled roads. The city lights looked like stars dropping to the Earth, making her feel as if they were being squeezed between two galaxies. There were no words magical enough to describe what she was seeing, so Y/N didn't say anything, and just took in a deep breath to let it go with the biggest smile on her face.

It was windy on the roof, so Harry took off his coat and wrapped it around her shoulders. They sat side by side on two wooden chairs, staring at the city and the sky above, completely mesmerized by such beauty, which had completely changed Y/N's opinion about London. Maybe from a different and higher view, it wasn't plain and dull after all.

"Almost like Holmes Chapel, huh?" She heard him speak and turned to look at him. Harry was gazing up with a beam on his face as he pointed to the sky, and told her the names of the stars he knew, not aware that she wasn't really listening. She was too busy looking at him, and thinking, maybe somewhere underneath that man was still the little boy she used to know.

"Oh, I forgot!" He suddenly flinched and turned to pick up the box at his feet. "I made this for you. But...the rest of the batch...already ended up in the trash bin."

He opened the box and revealed one single cupcake with a candle on top. It didn't look terrible, still, it wasn't a very pretty cupcake either. But if that was the best out of the whole batch, Y/N couldn't help but snort as she tried to imagine what the other ones looked like.

"Hey, don't laugh at me! At least I tried!"

"Okay, okay." Y/N bit her lip to hold back a smile. She didn't know why it was so endearing that he'd exerted himself to make her one cupcake. Even if he'd got it from a store instead, she would still be overjoyed.

"Can I eat it now?" She asked, but he quickly shook his head no.

"You have to make a wish first."

Y/N giggled, eyes bored into Harry as he looked around to find something else. "Shit!" His jaw went slack. "The lighter! I forgot the lighter."

"Relax, lemme check," Y/N mumbled, reaching inside the inner pocket of his coat to search for the object, and she felt something like a little triangle box, assuming it was the lighter. But when she took it out, both of them froze as they saw what it really was.

A pack of cigarettes.

Y/N's mouth fell open, she was speechless, and so was he. "Harry..." Her voice was quiet when she looked at him. "Do you smoke?"

"No." He shook his head fast. "N-Not anymore."

"Really?"

"Why would I lie?" A blush crept up his face as he made eye-contact with her. "If I still smoked, I would have a lighter with me, right?"

That sounded like a good enough reason for her to believe him. Moreover, he didn't smell like someone who smoked, and she'd never seen him with a cigarette between his fingers before. So apparently he was telling the truth. Y/N inhaled deeply as she nodded, squeezing his hand for more assurance.

"Smoking could kill you. So don't...don't go back to it..." The way she could barely maintain eye contact while saying that to him made his heart flutter somehow. He took her other hand, linking their fingers together as he asked, "are you worried about me?"

"Of course I am," she said without pause. "I can't bear the thought of losing you."

The corners of her mouth turned down and her whole face contorted so he knew she was serious when she said those words. After all this time, he still mattered to her; and knowing that was like getting a heavy weight lifted off his chest.

.

.

.

Harry sank into his chair, holding the mini calendar above his face. "It's already April," he mumbled to himself, but his roommate Isaac assumed Harry was talking to him, so he replied, "yeah, almost time for finals."

It wasn't finals that came to Harry's mind when he thought about April, it was a birthday actually. He rarely remembered birthdays, and sometimes he forgot his own; but for some reasons, he always remembered hers. He hadn't spoken to Y/N since the night he left, and he could never forget the way she looked at him when she asked him to kiss her. It was awkward, yet it was sad. She truly cared about him, and he could never repay the same kind of feelings because she was too young. So he didn't know how to talk to her again after everything she'd confessed. The last thing he wanted was to lead her on and lull her into believing that one day he might feel the same. He knew he could never like her back the way she wanted him to.

However, it would be a lie to say he didn't miss her. He missed her a lot. How could he forget about his little Bambi? She was the only girl he'd spent the best years of his childhood protecting and looking after. She was something more than just the girl next door, and he kept the image on her face on the treehouse that night in his memory as he left Holmes Chapel with no intention of coming back. Every time he thought about her, a part of him wanted to pay her a visit, but he was glad he didn't change his mind. But now her birthday was coming close, and he knew she wanted him to be there with her. He wanted to be there with her. But he couldn't.

"Isaac," Harry broke the silence in the dorm room, turning his head to look at his best friend who was lying on the bed. "What should I give a fifteen-year-old girl for her birthday?"

The sudden question made Isaac lift an eyebrow. "I thought you only had a big sister?"

"Uhm...it's actually for my...my...cousin."

"Well, I'm bad at this stuff. Why don't you ask Niall?"

Harry rolled his eyes and scoffed. "He would just give me crazy ideas."

"Then ask the birthday girl herself." Isaac shrugged, sticking out his bottom lip. "I mean, try to be subtle and find out what she likes without giving away the fact that you don't know what to get her."

If only it was that easy. Harry shook his head and put the calendar back down. He used to be the one who knew about her more than anyone else, probably only second to her mother, he should be able to know what she liked, but right now he didn't. He knew nothing about her anymore. It was only then that he started to feel bad for all the time he didn't spend with her. But had he not kept his distance, their goodbye would've been much harder.

So he tried to think, swirling the pencil in his hand for a couple seconds. And finally, an idea came to his mind. Maybe there could be a way for him to come back to her after all.

.

.

.

For the rest of the night, Harry and Y/N sat in their chairs, eating pizza for dinner while discussing irrelevant topics like the existence of aliens, strange kinds of flowers, as well as their favorite movies, songs, and books. Soon both grew tired so they fell back to silence. He was staring at the city, and she was taking in the sight of him.

"Are you mad that I lied to you?" Her sudden question made him turn around with an eyebrow raised. "You know, about Isaac."

"I'm not mad at you, kid. But I'd like to know what happened..." Harry couldn't say he had heard most of the story from Niall because he wanted Y/N to tell him herself, if she trusted him enough, and of course, he didn't expect her to. But somehow she did. She ended up telling him everything.

"I didn't want Isaac to turn down the job offer for a relationship that would probably never work." She sighed with her chin on her knuckles, hooded eyes staring blankly ahead. "I liked him a lot. And I thought to myself that if he asked me to be his girlfriend, I would say yes immediately. But when it happened, I got scared. I couldn't let him in because I was afraid that if he knew too much about me, he wouldn't like me anymore. I guess I'm just not ready to fall in love again, and I don't want him to wait for me to be ready. My first and only relationship didn't end very well. So I didn't have the heart to let the same thing happen to us." Holding her breath, she said, "He's too good for me anyway. I'm better off alone."

"Nobody is better off alone," Harry spoke at last, a line appeared between his brows. "Everyone needs someone."

"Not me." She shrugged, and the look in her eyes broke his heart in a million pieces. "I'm sorry I had to lie to you...I didn't want you to do anything for my birthday. I've troubled you enough already."

"But you're not troubling me, love. I did all of this because I wanted to. I...I care about you."

She couldn't remember the last time she heard him say those words, or if he'd ever said them at all. So to hear them now made her feel happy and sad at the same time. If there was one thing that she'd learned from their 'relationship' it would be, Harry's words weren't always credible.

"How did you find this place though?" She changed the subject, putting on a smile to lighten up the mood, which had gotten a bit blue since Isaac was mentioned. She could see it from the look on his face that he was also glad she'd brought up something else.

"Niall's uncle owns this building. They're doing some reconstructing so it's closed for a couple months. It might be the only place we could be together without people bothering us."

"Thank you." Y/N took in a long breath as she smiled. "I've never seen London so beautiful."

"Agreed." Harry nodded fast. In this bad lighting, his dimples seemed even deeper than they actually were. "But my favorite is the winter time. The city looks best when it's covered in snow."

Those last words made Y/N's head turn as her eyes went round.

"It was you, wasn't it?" she cried out, causing the man to jump in shock. He was meant to ask, but she didn't even let him have his chance. "The snow globe! You asked Gemma to give it to me, did you?!"

"Ouch!" He yelped when she smacked him hard on the arm. The girl didn't look very sorry when he rubbed the sore spot and his brows drew together in utter perplexity.

"Why did you ask her to lie for you?! I was so sad, I thought you didn't remember my birthday!"

"I thought it was for the best if you forgot about me, after..."

There was a pause, a gap for her to fill in.

"Our first kiss...I know," she mumbled at last.

It was weird to talk about it now, since both of them had been pretending like the kiss she'd stolen from him when she was fourteen had never happened. After all, she was fourteen at the time, he couldn't blame her for acting so impulsive. But recently he'd been thinking about it and wondering if her feelings back then had been all true.

Her eyes darted as she whispered under her breath, but still loud enough for him to hear, "why didn't you send me anything on my birthday next year or the ones after that?"

"I...I wanted to...I almost did." He swallowed hard while fidgeting in his seat. "But Gemma said you were seeing this boy, so I thought I should stay away from your life and let you forget about me for good. Then time passed and I actually didn't think a lot about you, until..."

She nodded without waiting for him to finish, her lashes fluttered as sadness overtook her face. After a moment of thinking, she asked, "if you could turn back time, would you come back to see me?"

"Yes," he answered. "Without a second thought."

Y/N had seen Harry in a lot of different situations, yet she'd never seen him like that, all flustered and ill at ease. She loved the way the rings on his fingers sparkled as he was nervously toying with the hem of his shirt. She loved it when even under the dim lights surrounding them, she could see a blush creep up his face. She knew better, that it was never good when she felt so drawn to him, yet she couldn't stop, so she released a slight laugh, which got his attention.

"Why are you laughing?" He asked.

Shaking her head with the grin still remained, she said, "nothing."

.

.

.

As he walked with her five floors up to her flat, Harry struggled to find something to say so the silence carried on until they reached her front door. He couldn't explain why he was at a loss for words every time he stood in front of her. He knew her well, he'd grown up with this girl. But deep down inside he knew it wasn't like that, not anymore. He knew his heart had more to say about her than it should, and the way it began to race whenever she was around had him frustrated most of the times.

He watched her unlock her front door and turn to say goodbye. But just when she was about to leave, he stopped her by taking her hand. It wasn't the first time they'd held hands, still, he let hers go after about two seconds like it was hot coal burning his skin. Maybe it was, maybe she was, yet he couldn't stay away because he enjoyed the burn. With round Bambi eyes, she stared at him, slightly puzzled by his strange behaviors. Harry asked her to wait. He searched in his pants pocket, finally pulling out a silver locket necklace.

"Your birthday present."

"Harry—"

He shushed her right away, telling her to turn around as he took a step closer to put the chain around her neck. His fingers brushed against her collarbone only once, but it was enough for both of them to flinch at the contact. Y/N gently touched the heart-shaped locket now lying on her chest, then opened it to find a tiny photo of her mother.

"So you could always keep her by your heart," he whispered, his voice was low and hot against her ear.

Slowly, Y/N turned around, but Harry didn't pull away so they were just one step away from pressing against each other. She meant to just thank him and go inside her flat, but as she parted her lip, not a single sound managed to escape. Her cheeks turned pink, her bottom lip was quivering as she batted her lashes. She had never looked into his eyes for that long, and the look he was giving her made her pupils dilated. It was the same look she'd seen him give that blonde haired girl on the treehouse when he was seventeen. He had never looked at Y/N that way before, and now he did. If only she could read his mind, she would know he was also trying to do the same.

Harry knew it was wrong, but he couldn't resist. The last time he had the same feeling, he wasn't thinking straight so he went for it by instinct. Now he knew exactly what was happening, and still, he didn't stop it. He leaned in a little closer, their foreheads touching. He expected her to pull away or even slap him for making that bold move, yet she stayed exactly where she was, chest heaving with anticipation. Her scent was flooding his senses, and the second he finally found the courage to place his hands on her hips, it was she who decided the next move.

Her lips brushed against his. Not innocently, but hot and passionately, he wanted to pull away before he lost control, but like a magnet, she drew him in more and now he was stuck. "Harry," she whispered slowly, making his heart flutter as he clasped his hands on either side of her face.

That kiss wasn't like the first or the second, this time it was an open-mouthed, almost sexual kiss. He pushed her against the door, loving the way her body melted into his as their lips fitted perfectly like they were made for each other. She held his hair and he held her so tight as if he was afraid it wasn't real, and she would disappear the moment he loosened his grip. They broke away after what seemed like ages, and from the look in her eyes, he could tell she expected him to run, just like he had before.

But he didn't. Even if he wanted to, he knew his trembling feet wouldn't let him. She stood with her back against the door, him with one hand on her hip, the other fisted to rest beside her head. He inhaled sharply and she was still trying to steady her breathing. It took almost five seconds for either to open their eyes and look at the other person.

"Goodnight," she mumbled, reaching behind for the doorknob and the next thing he knew, she had fled inside and shut the door right in front of his face. Harry was left standing in the hallway like an idiot, not knowing what to do next. He lifted a fist, about to knock because there were still many things that he wanted to say to her, an apology was one of which. But he thought again and decided that he should probably go.

Harry left the building, stepping out on the street with his head still on the cloud as he kept touching his lips, trying not to smile so big or else people would think he was insane. But maybe he was, because he was too happy to act differently. He got into his car and sat there with both hands on the steering wheel, head tossed back, smiling contently. His whole face was red, but he didn't really mind. He was soaked in the scent of her perfume, and all he could think about was how he could possibly fall asleep with every trace of her lingering on his body.

His phone lit up in the dark, notifying a new text from Bambi which got him to sit up straight at once. His heart could've exploded when he read the first line, if the next one hadn't come on in less than a second.

⌲ Bambi: That kiss was a mistake.

⌲ Bambi: You're gonna have to earn it next time.

⌲ Next time? :)

⌲ Bambi: Don't be smug about it!

⌲ I'm not! But wait, on the scale from 1-10, how great was tonight? (minus the kiss)

⌲ Bambi: 7/10 (including the kiss)

⌲ Heeeeeey!

Sitting at her working desk, chin resting on her palm, Y/N cracked a smile. The birthday surprise, as well as the kiss they'd shared in the hallway,  were definitely 11/10. But she couldn't give it to him that easily. She placed her phone down, leaving his latest message on read as she touched the chain around her neck once again.

The London snow globe was still sitting on her desk, and she hadn't touched it in so long that it was a bit dusty now. She kept it there so it could remind her of the terrible birthday she should already forget, but she didn't want to. It was a way of telling herself that sometimes the people you loved would leave you behind, and that was just a cruel fact of life that one should just accept and carry on. But now that she knew it wasn't all true, the way she felt about the snow globe had also changed.

Quickly, she typed down 'Thank you for the locket' and sent it to him, then while waiting for him to reply, she sent another text right after.

⌲ I have two tickets to see Heathers The Musical

⌲ H: Yes.

⌲ I haven't even asked?

⌲ H: Whatever you're gonna ask, it's a yes.

⌲ Have you even watched Heathers?

⌲ H: There's always Google! Send me the date and time, my assistant will get back to you shortly.

⌲ Haha funny.

Y/N rolled her eyes and giggled as she snapped a quick shot of the tickets Alice had given her and sent it to him.

⌲ H: Wednesday night! I'm free!

⌲ You sure there's not another award show that night? I'm gonna kill you if you skip another one for me.

⌲ H: Nah I'm not supposed to attend any event next week. If you don't believe me, google it!

⌲ Oh God.

⌲ H: Say that instead of my name 'next time'.

Y/N's face turned scarlet when she read that line. She sucked in her bottom lip, face-palming herself with her eyes shut and wishing she hadn't moaned his name into the kiss. That couldn't have been more embarrassing. She typed down a few words, trying to come up with a reply that would save herself from the humiliation, yet she kept typing and deleting for three times or so. Then came two new messages from him.

⌲ H: It's late. Go to sleep Bambi. Good night.

⌲ H: Once again, happy birthday! :)

The twenty-year-old smiled to herself as she sent him back a goodnight text. Y/N knew she should get to bed now if she wanted to wake up early for a class in the morning. But she also knew it would take forever for her to fall asleep. This time, fortunately, it wasn't gonna be the birthday blues that kept her up all night.

[teenagebeautyqueen]

[Image description: a young person holds a mobile phone with a blue case and a paper on the other. the paper has a drawing of an umbrella colored with the trans pride flag. we can only see their upper body. they are looking down and to the left of the image. they're smiling without showing their teeth, and look relaxed. they're wearing a black, loose hoodie and some shorts can be seen at the bottom of the picture. they're also using black nail polish. on the background there is a door and a star wars poster. the other image is a close up of the paper. end ID]

🌈ʜᴇ/ᴛʜᴇʏ🌈

happy trans day of visability to all my fellow trans*!! here is me and my project for peace's day... i personally love it. it's on spanish, but i'll translate it for y'all.

the text on the left says "cada persona que conoces está luchando una batalla de la que no sabes nada. sé amable. siempre", which is the translation of that quote that goes like "every person you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. be kind. always".

the one on the right says "¿qué sentido hay en pelear? ¿por qué insistimos en sabotearnos mutuamente? Todos caminamos por el mismo sendero embarrado, todos nos dirigimos al mismo final." its translation is something like "what's the point on fighting? why do we insist on sabotage each other? we all walk the same muddy path, we are all headed for the same end."

and above the umbrella there's words like "odio", "acoso", "ignorancia" & "discriminación", which mean "hatred", "harassment", "ignorance", and "discrimination".

yeah i'm very subtle.

i've decided to share my story with the world. but i got kinda carried away. it's not s fairy tale, so don't read it if you're sensitive to themes like bullying, mental health issues, and toxic people.

——————————————————————

it's been... one ride of a journey, to say the least. i've said a few times that i started to question my gender around summer. but that's not quite true.

growing up, i never was fond of... anything that i associated with femenine, really. this included, but wasn't limited to, any color that wasn't blue (pink and purple get a special mention, i despised them), flowers, clothes too loose or too tight, shorts if they weren't from some sport, etc. i think you get the idea.

this collided with me being afab (aka a girl for everyone including myself) & neurodivergent. i wanted nothing to do with those things. but society wanted me to love them.

5 yo me said she didn't like Monster High. 5 yo female classmate said i was a weirdo. 7 yo me loved football. 7 yo male classmate said i couldn't play because i was a girl. 9 yo me hyperfixated on minecraft. 9 yo pretty much every classmate called me a geek.

so i stoped trying. for a while, i loved pink, wanted to have rapunzel's hair, watched disney channel, etc. but i already was the weirdo. i remember being three and friends with all of them. i remember playful fights for the toy rocket and reading books with the only other boy who could read, to ourselves, each other, and the whole class. but people grow up, and they change. so yeah, i was bullied. always the last one to be chosen, left alone on the bus rides, on my own at the playground.

and you'll be thinking "that sucks, but pao, how is it related to you being trans?"

you'll see, i didn't have many friends. i was kinda alone until i turned 7. then two new kids came to my class. let's call them eva and john. i made friends with them asap. i loved them so much!! they were my first friends since kindergarden. so i allowed myself to let go. i was already hated by most of my peers. why wouldn't i be myself with those who didn't despise me? (i was 7 when i thought this. 7 years old, and i thought that out of 20 people, 18 hated me. and then people wonder why i've got self-steem issues lmao. i'm tryna make the point that bullying in primary school isn't just some mean kids calling you names. i'm currently in high school and it still has its mark on me. but that's for another moment.)

so yeah. i went "wild". eva has adhd too (noice, right? i mean she has her diagnosis becaise she's primarly hyperactive, while i'm primarly inattentive, but we understood each other way quickier than with neurotypicals– even if i didn't know why yet), and john was kinda shy & corpulent (he wasn't fat, but he didn't look slim either), just like me. so we became friends. and i slowly opened up a little, while still playing my role of "the freak kid". i knew i was seen as that AND as the smart kid. double pressure, double bullying. but i had my small circle. it evolved until my current friend group, in which, god bless, there's a trans girl!! (eva's still on it– she's my best friend and i would die for her, no doubts. john can go fuck himself, the goddamned fascist).

but it ain't that easy. it never is. i'm 14 and afab. shit happens. y'all get it.

my first period happened while i was on a school trip (bad), on a hotel with no pads avaliable (very bad), on another country so i couldn't call my mum unless i had wifi because politics & stuff– and i did not have wifi (really bad). cue a lot of dysphoria (even if i didn't know it was that) + not being able to contact anyone. add the fact that i was the second one to have it, and it was some kind of taboo– it meant the other girls wouldn't leave me alone, and the result is clear: one of my worst panic attacks ever, on a tiny bathroom of some shitty hotel room.

from there it went downhill. my body started to become femenine, and the football short didn't make my hips smaller. my face, my oh so alarged face, suddenly became rounder. puberty hit me not only physically, but emotionally. and if that wasn't enough, we, as a class, were entering what's called here "the turkey age", a.k.a. teenagerhood, where looks become even more important. it didn't take long until i hated my body.

[WARNING: from here, this gets hard. mentions of eating disorders, depressive episodes/thoughts, toxic enviroments, homophobia/transphobia (both internalized and external), anxiety attacks, and thoughts of self-harm]

i thought "it's big, it shouldn't be big, it's fat. besides i don't want it to grow so fast. i want to make it stop growing. how? well, i grow up by eating. no eating=no growing".

yeah. eating disorder. when i think about it, i want to laugh. because it only took a few comments and "jokes" for me to be so angry at myself when i should be mad with them. i'm big. always have been, very likely always will. i've been told that i could make a very good rugby player. i probably would. i shared my cantine table with people (😔). and they wouldn't shut up. "[deadname], the rest wants to eat too!", "look at [deadname], she's gonna eat it all!". things like that. i stoped eating. i would pick up the smallest amount of food i could, even if my stomach was begging me to please eat something. eventually, my mum found out. and she helped me to grow out of it. i sometimes releapse, but never for that long. because i went on a whole year like that. and it sucked.

so, last year. socially anxious neurodivergent girl with several doubts on her sexuality gets to eight grade.

i play basketball. since i was little. i used to enjoy it a lot. we weren't a team– we were a family. loved 'em so much, 1000/10 one of the best things of my life. BOOM. now you're old enough & good enough to be on the "good" team. in the good time there's the cool kids. i am not a cool kid. oops. i was left behind, they all laughed at my back, no one cared about me (except one girl, but she was in the group and was scared to act until almost the end of the year. love her for that tho). i felt like shit. i was too scared to go to train. the sight of a ball scared me, because i couldn't help but think everyone was talking shit about me. we went to a national championship and when they went out to the city, they didn't tell me, then sent a pic of them having fun to the groupchat & delated it saying "oops it was for the other group". i had several breakdowns on my room that night. it was such a bad experience i can't even hear the name of the city without tearing up.

not to count that a new girl decided to make my life a living hell. now i know how to deal with her, but then i didn't, and i ended up curled up on the bathroom floor crying.

all while i discovered my own identity. i was so scared of being non-straight i hated myself for it.

it was a tough year and there were times where i would wish i'd never existed. it was too much for me to deal with, and i was just miserable. but i got out of it. remember the trans girl i mentioned? she's closeted, and she told me just this october. but even before that, she was my friend. she bought a new life to it all, a fresh one. i owe her a lot, including accepting myself as i am.

she is here, despite everything.

i am here, despite everything.

you are all here, despite everything.

some of us aren't here. they are the ones we remember. each one of us has our history. i shared mine with you all. it is not an easy road. you know that. it's hard, and it's tough, and it's difficult, and it's unfair.

but we are here, despite everything. the ones who made it, the ones who didn't, the ones who are halfway through it, and the ones who are to come.

we are here. we are trans. and we won't be erased.

[thedispatched]

Ok so I finally read the soompi post defending Lucas and I wanted to share my thoughts:

They presented some strong points, but their bias is also pretty obvious and they always land with such bold assumptions that just don't make sense. It makes me a bit skeptical.

Anyway, I'll start with the information they got from the ooooshiiim account and the twitter prediction account:

The user ids they represented are def real, that can be easily confirmed by going to websites that translate user handles to ids.

But them comparing one manga character to lucas and assuming that somehow that disproves OP 1's claims is hilarious LMAO. The description of the fictional character would literally fit most male idols, idk how they went like "oh this guy severely resembles lucas, another evidence yay!"

As with the Instagram account, I can't seem to find it?? If, say, it's really OP, did they happen to find the soompi post and decided to delete the Instagram account/change the username? This is also poses the possibility that the Instagram account isn't actually real, but I guess we'll never know.

I also wish the soompi lumi provided a link to the account and some more elaboration on how their cyber investigator found it through the twitter acc's digital footprints. The manga part is very elaborate but most else is just pretty vague which I find a bit questionable?

The said fabrication of the chat records: doesn't the gaps depend on what version of WeChat it is? I searched for "wechat screenshots" and some gaps can indeed be as big as the ones in the chat records.

It would also have been better if they highlighted the gap inconsistencies/misalignments they are pointing out because personally I don't see it(but maybe it's just my eyes bluffing).

I don't have much to say about the schedule parts since I don't follow their schedules closely and I'm too lazy to search for it, but I guess what those fans said do make sense.

The voice messages: I don't have much to say either since I don't speak korean. But last time I heard the alleged voice message and the bubble one lumis are using as proof, they didn't sound alike. But then again, I don't know korean.

The sasaeng photos: I guess it also kinda makes sense. But I feel like the fan who said they got the same photo OP 1 had provided should have just showed a screenshot of her conversation with the sasaeng she claims to be selling them, I mean, the photo is already out, so what difference of not specifying which photo it is/not showing the screenshots of her conversation with the sasaeng would make?

The ring part: the soompi lumi's argument also seems pretty valid. It really does not look like his finger.

The OP 2 part: I don't know mandarin or cantonese so I can't really comment on the nuances the fans are trying to point out. I don't understand the red boxes though, were those part of the original photos OP 2 provided or are they highlights of the misalignments lumis are trying to point out?

The OP 3 part: Oh they can definitely be a guy, but it's also possible that they didn't use their actual gender in the account(I myself do that all the time, for privacy reasons). But once again, we will never know which is true.

The photo is indeed very questionable. Why is the background blurred? Why are there plushies everywhere? Why is there a reflection of what seems like a man in the glass when they're supposedly alone? But there seems to be a door and a small hallway reflected on the glass too? It looks clean and hotel-like. And the one who took the photo seemed to be sitting right besides him based on the photo's angle. If it's taken by a sasaeng staff as fans have claimed, how did the sasaeng staff secretly took a photo like that while literally sitting besides lucas and with other people around them(like the "man in the glass") without the other people in the dorm questioning what the fuck is that staff doing? But another explanation I can think of(if the photo really came from a sasaeng staff) is that a member took the photo(with Lucas being aware of it) and somehow the sasaeng staff managed to get it?

With OP 3's chat records, again I don't see the gap mistakes or misalignment they are pointing out, I again tried to look at WeChat examples on the internet and the difference between the size of the messages and the dates is a normal thing, so is the gap between 2 messages vs the gap at bottom of the chat. And the "difference" between the two s's in lucas's username they are pointing out is honestly ridiculous. The photo is taken from an asymmetrical angle, of course the sizes would look unequal.

The sleeping photos: the plushies' textures don't look the same, dorm plushie looks more rough while the plushie Lucas is sleeping with looks softer and fuzzier. And if it was taken by a sasaeng in the wayv dorm as fans have claimed, how the hell is the sasaeng within such a close proximity? There's so many people in the dorm and I doubt they'd be all asleep at that time to not notice that a sasaeng is right besides their sleeping member literally photographing him.

The jacket and photo receipts: Oh I've seen this on another article. I'm convinced with the debunking of the jacket part, and receipts are everywhere in the internet. I guess it isn't impossible that OP 3 might have just took the receipts somewhere online.

OP 4's surfing video: Yes, same pose, but different angles? That does not look exactly the same as the one he showed in his socials. But that black spot is definitely questionable.

OP 4's WeChat records: Oh another questionable one. Especially the imbalance in the color value. But once I again I think it would have been better if they provided the links to the other debunk posts they included because man I can't see the cutting traces in the chats that they are pointing out.

OP 1's second post: again I think the difference in wechat date layouts depend on the version? And why did most koreans themselves didn't question the difference in OP 1's wechat? Like if korean wechat really don't look like that, wouldn't they point it out?

"their account creation dates and account activity all falls within the same time period." Um no?? 2015, 2019, 2018 are same time periods??

In conclusion, as I said before, I think the soompi lumi presented strong points that really make you question the credibility of the allegations, but their intense bias towards lucas makes them quite questionable, too. And the way they treat every debunk post like the absolute divine truth is pretty off-putting.

I'm convinced not everything in the allegations are true. I'm just curious about the severity of his actions. Maybe he dated them, but maybe he wasn't an asshole? But if that's the case why would they try to ruin his image if he treated them right? Or maybe he really was an asshole but some of the story isn't true? Ah I'm still so confused of what to think but I believe there has to be some truth in the story, but just how bad is the truth???

thank you for sending me your thoughts! it's always interesting to see what other people think. (and sorry for the late reply!)

i'm not gonna say much as i've talk about my thoughts on the post already.

i agree about the manga, it's absolutely ridiculous how comparing one manga character to lucas debunks their claims. that's just one example of one of the far fetched assumptions that made me lean more towards not believing the article.

part of me also wondered if they created the ig account for their article but like you said, we’ll never know.

even if it doesn’t look like his finger in the messages, I’m pretty sure he mentioned winwin in the texts ??

I know some people blur the background of photos for either aesthetic, or mostly for privacy reasons.

I honestly don’t know how people are seeing a man in the reflection. It’s a literally blob. You can’t make out any (person) shape.

The jacket and receipts is the only thing I took away from that article that I actually kind of believed. I talked about this with another anon. That is super easy to fake, but the photos were also originally blurry so a “blur” around the words would be hard to solidify as evidence unless the photo is in ultra hd or something lol. But to me this is the most believable to be fake.

I once saw a twitter thread pointing out how the messages weren’t photoshopped and explained why they looked “misaligned” or whatever but I can’t remember what it said exactly besides auto translations. I won’t be able to find it again because it was so long ago :/

Someone can correct me if I’m wrong but wechat is more of a China thing? Like not a lot of people outside of China/non-Chinese use it. You’re right about why Koreans didn’t point it out, but I don’t think they’d know if they don’t use it ??

You asked a lot of questions and pointed out a lot of things that are something to think about, but I don’t think anyone has a clear answer unless you have an extreme bias.

I also wondered the severity of his actions. I think this whole thing is a mix of truth and lies. We all want to know the truth and the worst part is we never will. Like you said, how bad is the truth?

(I might edit this later and add some stuff 😅)

[oskarsinickihndphoto]

Exhibition Review - International Surrealism Room Tate Modern

I had the opportunity of going down to London this weekend and because of that I missed the Modern Insitute trip but I feel like I made up for it by going to the Tate.

The room I will be reviewing is the International Surrealism exhibition in room 4, but the placard in the actual room says in the studio 5 so I'm not too sure if it's in the room or the studio. Here is the placard.

I picked this room because I really enjoy surrealism art and trying to find the point of it, even if there isn't - which is quite dumb I know.

The whole room is a tiny bit white and each painting is hung at eye level with a glass pane over them but there are some that are put high up above the others to make space my guess is, it doesn't really add to the experience apart from having to look up at these paintings.

The paintings are all done by old 'legendary' painters like Salvador Dalí, Picasso, Yves Tanguy and others during the surrealism movement that started in the 1920s.

Because this exhibition is in the Tate then this is just for the average art consumer or tourist going through the Tate but it is can also be for more hardened artists that want to see these types of paintings in person.

I also wanted to add the art description but tumbler only allows 10 images

These were my favourite out of all the paintings but my favourite favourite is the triptych 'Black Virtue' by Matta (the last one) mostly because of the outer space all being nature of it, which is what I first thought, oh its a painting made about space and how aliens are enjoying it on their space ship, nope. It is imagery of erotic and violent scenes, which I now see, the red n white of the left painting symbolizing purity and love but the black shapes cut through these causing unease and confusion. The right is much narrower in canvas size and has more darker and violent colours and paint strokes which suggest hiding or covering up. The middle, the biggest canvas size has the most open space and the most imagery, the description of the painting says there's suggestions of the female organs and I agree, there's also a temple of sort in the top right. I really like this painting and the complete different thought process I had before I read the description, it also made me feel lost afterwards I was standing there for quite a bit trying to figure it all out and the violent nature of it did make me go woah.

All the paintings have been bought by people all across the world but have been 'let' by them for the Tate to have them on display. This room has been curated by Matthew Gale. All the paintings have art description and a little bit about the artist.

[lranceusw2]

Week 13 - Planning For Printing

This week I did the final preparations for my long week of printing. I started with setting up a printing place for me, to centralize my actions. I laid all my lino out and it felt like I'd achieved both much more than I expected and like not very much at all. My next job was to make the alphabets usable; what I'd found in my practise run was that rolling the ink onto them and them trying to press them down just got too messy, so I decided to try make them into removable stamps. The idea was to have one handle I could attach any letter stamp to and press it down without having to get my fingers inky and smudge it all over the page. Luckily, I had some sticky velcro circles that did the trick just right. I stuck a few letters on each circle and cut them out, this process was a little fiddly and took longer than I expected but I got it all done. I tested the technique and, yeah, it does the job, like with traditional printing I think there's a knack to how thick or wet to make the ink, but I kinda got the hang of it and I'm not too fussed about it looking a little messy as it's all hand printed so I think it being irregular adds to the charm. Oh, I also quickly cut some numbers and a % sign for my fast fashion page as "eighty-five-percent" takes up much more space them "85%", it felt like a good idea as my pages aren't exactly brimming with spare blank space.

I have throughout this process had a road map of what was on each page, as the lino can't be changed once cut I thought it was essential to have a plan before I made any of them, but now they are all cut out I can tweak the plan to best fit the pieces I've got. At first, I made my printing set up based around laying the prints out and placing the paper on them, this means I laid them out backwards so they'd print the correct way round. This worked for the planning process, but, as my later tests discovered, I can't print multiple at the same time so I will be pressing them onto the right side of the paper not the wrong side. As my first layout test featured some bits of sample text, I am glad I did it in a way that meant I could see the look of the text amongst the illustrations. This first attempt showed I had a few issues to fix; I moved the hand sewing and machine sewing descriptions to separate pages so I had more room for text and I shifted page 7 into page 4s position as it made more sense in the chronology of the zine.

My final set up is the last one in that image, I think it works as a readable book and gives me enough space to showcase my illustrations along side informative text! I am really hoping this zine can be read and improve people's actions towards fast fashion and sewing in a way that can actually help with global warming. I know that it is not down to the individuals to save the climate but I do truly believe that the whole crux of capitalism is that without demand there will be no supply, so buy shopping second hand and mending your clothes you are keeping your coins away from the huge business that are the leading polluters affecting the climate.

I did a few test runs of printing this week too, I tried inking up multiple lino cuts and trying to print them in one go (if only I had a printing press..) and it was a mess, they all moved around while I was trying to spoon the back of one. I tried next to print a few in a row of using the traditional hand printing, press on paper, flip and smooth, and even that didn't quite work as once there was wet ink on the right side it was hard not to smudge it around while doing the second print. I decided, after much experimentation that my official prints would be printed one at a time, then a long wait until its dry and print the next. And with that I'm ready to print my final copies!

[notinhabited-blog]

do you have any advice for beginning rpers? i really wanna get into this style of roleplaying but i'm used to those short-answer fuckin like.. quotev or discord style roleplays. i think i could learn how to do the paragraph stuff and i've been practicing a lot and trying real hard on my own! i think i'm ready. but i see everyone on this website with years and years of experience, and i'm scared nobody will want to roleplay with a beginner :[

Oh geez. I might not be the best person to ask but I’ll try to help. I started roleplaying 12 years ago, but that was mostly on forums. So moving to tumblr was a big change because it’s a lot less organized. So let me see if I can maybe help.

Okay so if you are going into the indie rp scene, it’s not gonna be easy. 

First off, make sure you know your character’s voice. The way that they speak is important. If you do short stuff, you are probably already decent enough at this. When I first started writing (fanfics lol), I got a lot of criticism about not deprescribing things. I highly suggest that you write some stuff for practice and set a limit for yourself. Tell yourself you cannot write dialogue for a certain amount of time or paragraphs. 

Second, I’m gonna say you have to get used to rejection. People are fairly selective at times and sometimes they won’t follow you back. That’s okay. You’ll find people who will write with you. Don’t give up. People might not answer your asks. That’s okay. Not your fault. People might just fucking ignore you. Move on. Any artistic expression is open to hurt you to be honest. You are putting work into something and people can shoot you down, reject you, or ignore you. 

Third, I’d say you try to match your partner’s length. When I first started writing, my replies would get shorter and shorter. I like to go through each paragraph of my partner’s reply and try to show what my character was doing during every sentence. If they seem to be following your actions in their reply, describe what your character does next in response. Picture it in your head. Try to watch scenes of something and image how it would be written. Think about how stories or books you read do it. Matching length is one of the things that taught me how to be more descriptive and get more into my character’s head. 

Fourth is to put your head totally into your character. If you are doing a canon character, I usually like to imagine their thoughts during canon scenes. Their feelings. Music helps me think of my character’s mindset honestly. I’d suggest making a playlist you can listen to while you write.

  Okay so fifth. I’ve noticed that not being quiet helps. Reply to your mutuals opens, like the starter calls, send all the memes. Do anything to get your name on other people’s blogs. Most you followers are gonna come from people see your url on people they follow’s blogs. And remember, just because someone doesn’t answer and ask or write a starter, it doesn’t mean you should give up. I’m also gonna add that messaging people you want to roleplay with about potential plots helps. With a lot of my blogs, I’d go to people with a few plots already in my mind so they wouldn’t have to work as hard. It feels nice to have someone think about what your muses could do together. 

 Sixth, keep your ooc posting light, especially when you first make your blog. If you follow someone and they go to your page and you have all ooc posts, they might not follow you back. And always read people’s rules before you follow them to avoid complications. 

Seventh. If someone makes you uncomfortable, don’t let them keep doing it to be nice. I used to do this so much that I have had to leave blogs before. Also, make sure you have a rules page and an about page. Most people won’t follow people that don’t. 

Also, things tend to go better if you have icons and a decent theme in terms of people actually wanting to write with you. Generally, people like to use icons with shorter stuff because (in my opinion) it makes it easier to tell who’s talking. If you are serious about doing this, I would be happy to make you some graphics tbh. But if you don’t want to use them, plenty of people have a good time roleplaying without them. 

If you want any help with anything, feel free to message me or IM me. Maybe I can help. 

We all were first starting out at one point. Just make sure you have it on your page. I did that when I first started on tumblr. As long as you are polite and try really hard, people will help you out. I wouldn’t know how to do anything here if people hadn’t told me when I started. 

  Feel free to message me with anything you may need. If you message me not on anon, I’ll answer you privately if you’d like. I’d be happy to help honestly. 

  I hope you have a nice day. Hope this somehow helped and did seem like a crazy person rambling. 

[mummified-game-review]

2064 Read Only Memories: A Review

If you haven't played this game, then are there other point and click, cyberpunk kidnapping, mystery games that came in the Racial justice bundle that you think I should check out? Let me know all about them in the comments.the garden center of my closest hardware store and I’m trying to decide if the start up cost of 15 bucks in in my budget.

Welcome back to another video game review here on Mummified Games. Today were going to be taking a look at the modern Point and Click Mystery game 2064: Read Only Memories. By Midboss.

This game has a lot of charm to it. I Love how this game presents itself. The Music, art, story, and voice work, is all great and do a really great job of pulling me in. I did not want to stop playing. This was the first time where I was like okay maybe i play for 2 hours. And then write the review. But sadly there was no way I could do that if I wanted to make my deadline.

So the game is a future cyberpunk scene where Humans have found a way to cybernetically and biologically augment their bodies. Sort of just like every other Cyberpunk cenario. Just par for the course at this point.

Wouldn't have it any other way.

But what's great about this game is that it's not overly burdened with the constant narrative of life sucks and there's inequality and class disparity.

It's not dystopian cyberpunk, it's more optimistic. People seem to really be jammin with the future that they find themselves in. For the most part.

So it's your standard affair people are making so many augmentations to themselves in so many different ways. That there is a rebel group that is coming up that wants to see humanity return to who they were.

Not like a full blown god's perfect image, it's not a religious thing. But still embracing tradition and what makes humans human.

I don't know if we have the science to make Snake people then I'm all for it.

Ooo la la.

There are Robots that this big company is making that are designed to Walk like the humans, talk like the humans. But it's all just fancy code. And then the game tells you about one scientist that is working on transcending that limitation of just fancy code. And make something new.

Story intro out of the way, The scene opens with your less than standout apartment and you learn that you are a journalist, sort of.

And after you go through a nothing of a tutorial. As in like it's almost not even there cause it's so basic. You write a report and then go to bed.

INCITING ACTION

In the middle of the night a little blue robot hacks your door. And breaks into your apartment. Interfaces with your computer, cleans your apartment and also tries to clean the old computer, bricking it in the process.

You wake up and they tell you that they have selected you out of all known contacts of their master to help them track their master down. He was Captured last night and you need to join the robot to track down their master.

The robot's name is Turing, probably named after the real person Alan Turing the Computer Scientist.

A note about the dialogue and interactions with Turing. ALL THEIR LINES ARE VOICED! This game gives you so much during the process. There is a lot of reading to be doing in this game and luckily it's not all put on you.

I don't want you to think that I don't like Reading. Or that I think reading is hard. But if I'm meant to put multiple hours into a game. Doing nothing but reading for the entirety of it can get tiring

So I'm glad that so much is fully voiced. Gives you the chance to look down and tweet your love of this game for a second.

And that if there is a name or something that comes up you instantly know how it's meant to be pronounced. Instead of having to wait till you say it outloud in a video game review and suddenly everyone thinks “wait Tony, you say its like that? Wow okay”

Look, I have yet to hear anyone talk about Itch in casual conversation so I have no idea if you need to add the Dot I O to the end of it or if I sound like a Boomer who says out loud Dot Com at the end of every website name. “Yeah i just look it up on Google Dot Com”

I'm trying here folks I really am.

So after Turing tells you about what they need you join them on their mission to track down their creator and figure out what's at the bottom of this whole thing.

A note about the profile creation scene, it's quite funny and I thought it was super cool how they include multiple ways of character settings.

There's nothing visual that you can do to change your character so there's that. But Turing asks you for your name, you just type it out and I was excited for maybe a robot voice that was going to try to pronounce Mummified but it didn't go well.

Asks you for your pronouns, Yes! I love it. I would expect nothing less from a developer like Midboss. The people who host the Steam Summer of Pride Sale for the last couple of years Highlighing Queer games.

But the fact that they don't just limit to just He/Her/They but also Zir, and another one that slips my mind. And also an option to input your own preferred pronouns. SO COOL!

And I was ready to maybe answer one more silly question. That's where I was thinking the game would take things, assuming based on its sense of humor and the jokes that would come up in this game.

But no it was a real question about dietary needs and restrictions, to be kept in mind when out and about and talking about food. Holy crap that's so cool.

So the game gives you options like Omnivore, Vegetarian, Vegan, Halal, Gluten Free Dairy fr

What a super cool thing to include in your game. This just adds to the inclusion that is offered to players of all different ways of life.

So I just hunted down the list of food options in the video recording I took of this game and I'm reminded of just how funny this game is.

There are great jokes in this. There are subtle allegories to our own real world things in this game.

Turing says they found a better door that you could use to replace the current door you have due to its sub standard encryption features to prevent people from hacking though. And they recommend a particular model of door and mention it has over 300 reviews on Congo.

Wait... Congo. HA! Okay that got me. Cause you know Congo the river. And the Amazon river. I thought it was funny.

Also there is a joke about the Creator having a list of different things on the TV that they were watching like Ted’s Tech Tips. That one got me, because it might not be a thing but I'd like to think it's a nod to Linus Tech Tips.

This game is filled with great cute jokes. There are a couple of options that the game gives you when you wake up to see a strange robot in your room, some of the reactions are more fearful. And while reading them as an option I thought to myself WHY?

This little friend is Cute as hell. There's no way I would be scared of them. Their cute faces and little arms. I love them so much.

So the story is sound and the writing in it is so well done. The voice acting is great as well. Turing sounds innocent and has a cute childish nature to them, but they’re not dumb to say the least, they’re still the most advanced AI program in the world.

The gameplay is also stellar. Most of the interactions with things in this world are done with 4 different options.

Look: The game will give you a description of what the item, thing, person, whatever is.

Talk: If it's a person you can talk to them. Or sometimes things have voice commands.

Take/Touch, you might be able to pick something up or turn it on. Computers would take you to another window and you could do other things inside it.

Use time on: At the start of the game you're given an ID card and you pick up a pair of headphones in your apartment. The id could be used to get you places or scan for whatever might come up. Or you can connect your headphones to random things to hear stuff. What's funny is that you can use your headphones on almost anything and you can get some description of what you hear.

Real basic stuff. Like it's described. It's a Point And CLick Mystery Game. A lot of the game is being given a scene and you can talk to people in it, or interact with the things on the static screen.

Everything in this game flows so well together. Nothing takes you out of the experience. Its a story that takes you in and doesn't let go.

I think this is a game that I can fully recommend to people no matter what. If you have it. If you were curious about it. If you’ve never heard of it. Any range of feeling and knowledge of this game I highly recommend you go check it out.

If you have this game tell me your thoughts on it. Do you think Jessi was a jerk or if she is justified in her standoff-ness in her attitude?

If you haven't played this game, then are there other point and click, cyberpunk kidnaping, mystery games that came in the Racial justice bundle that you think I should check out? Let me know all about them in the comments.

In the meantime. Ah gee folks i really am thinking hard about that jade Plant. I'd love to get one. But my cable bill is coming and I know I need to take care of that first. Oh well. Maybe next month.

You all do the Youtube Dance, Like, Sub, Bell, Comment, and share this video with someone you know.

And as always hackers, Keep Digging, and we’ll make it out sometime.

See you in the next one.