#of course i'm also speaking very generally because there are ALWAYS exceptions

[marc--chilton]

(mgv) babies in omegaverse are slightly less frustrating to deal with due to mgv specific vocalizations. rather than having a catch-all cry that can leave parents pulling their hair out trying to figure out what their pup needs, babies start using specific noises to portray their wants very soon after birth (general starting point for this milestone is around one month). they whine for food, cry if they're lonely, chirp for boredom, etc. not only is it a benefit to the pup, but this stress lifting off the parents can also make the idea of having more pups enticing since this period of not-knowing-what-they-want is so short, meaning most of the other unpleasant parts of having a baby get overshadowed

[lordgeneralsix]

istvan in henry's place my lord? 👀 please share your new kcd diseases with us.......

this disease is what I like to call the um. sympathetic view of istvan. there isn't much to it since it's ofc just guesswork but here's the general idea...

let's start from the end of that post: "'you just won't give up will you? .. I actually like that about you .. it reminds me of someone'... makes me wonder about the stronger dogs he's confronted exactly like this and reduced them to nothing but a bloodstain on the floor."

istvan didn't come out of the womb evil, no one does, but we know what triggered this mental break - the turks killing his parents. it didn't happen overnight; this spiral was gradual. his life was stripped away from him and he's been acting out of self preservation ever since, desperately trying to regain control in his life.

i wonder about the time before he met erik and before he became nobility. istvan wasn't handed anything on a platter. he was not born w a silver spoon in his mouth like all his other nobleman colleagues, he had to earn that shit through blood. he doesn't fight for sigismund's cause, he is a mercenary with a bandit lover who fights for themselves only, which means sticking with the stronger dogs no matter what - because frankly, he is not.

istvan is a hypocrite; his whole life is about revenge. it didn't stop with killing turks, or the turks, his wrath extends to any that threaten his existence. then he finds erik and he feels for him. he takes erik in because he sees himself in his eyes, as I've mentioned before on my isterik post. istvan telling henry revenge is childish nonsense isn't him scolding henry, he's speaking from his own experience of living for nothing but revenge and never being sated. and maybe, just maybe, he's grown weary of the fight. but stopping is no longer a choice.

I'm going to throw in something i said to you before but it's pretty relevant now:

"[...]I really struggle to believe the evil mastermind narrative, bc taking out a man like istvan is completely insignificant compared to taking out a man like von bergow ... no one really respected him and I'm sure he knew, I mean they thought he was So weird and that He Killed Himself at trosky, not that he was significant enough to be hated and assassinated."

i feel like istvan's significance is played up. he was given a warden's job with little defense and three men who wanted to tear him limb from limb. he knew something bad was going to happen at trosky. his death is no big loss to anyone (except erik), because a spy can easily be replaced. that's all he ever was. istvan isn't important and neither is henry. istvan is doing bandit work and getting his hands dirty while his allies remain cozy in their castles - henry does the exact same field work for his lords. difference is, henry still has faith in people and the world, and of course his people care about him. istvan only has erik.

istvan is not stupid, he knows his allies are using him just as much as he's using them. then he tries to convey this reality to henry about his own allies with little success. during the torture scene he tells henry this isn't his war, almost pleading. very little torture actually takes place, and he chooses psychological tricks instead of physical pressure (e.g. saying zizka already told him what he needs to know when he didn't, letting henry say stupid things to him with little consequence, godwin always breaks if henry doesn't talk, maybe istvan knew and dragged it out to see just how much these people care about henry). he feels for henry in his own way, else he had many chances to just kill him and be done with it.

I draw lines to henry because he is also not fighting for wenceslas' cause, he is fighting for himself and the people he loves first who happen to align themselves with wenceslas. but henry is on a revenge streak first and foremost. he brutalized runt and istvan over a sword and treated the man who killed his parents w more dignity. he is just as capable of taking the low road as istvan, and for the moment he enjoys it too.

so when henry stares istvan down, istvan sees his younger self who revelled in his newfound control through brutality... but now he's aware of his place in the world and was trying to make sure erik didn't follow the same path, and by extension henry. he's much older than them. he's seen a lot of horrible shit; seen people succumb to the same cycle - including himself. erik represents the hope of breaking this cycle, and perhaps he saw that same hope within henry too.. but that doesn't matter anymore.

I can't stop thinking about istvan confronting the men who killed his parents the way henry confronted him. maybe they were important, maybe they were just soldiers. but there was no chance of a fair fight, maybe a knife in the dark, even poison. maybe he gave them the runt special, who knows. but for sure there are countless men he's graced with a visit in the night, just as he did with talmberg and hans' company. the stronger dogs have one fatal flaw of underestimating the weak, so he wouldn't make the same stupid mistake with henry... but it's a shock when he stabs him with the dagger so easily because he had more faith in henry keeping his honour. then he uses his final breath to not chide or congratulate henry for "finally learning", but warning him once again of the path he's carving. if he truly hated henry, this would not have been so easy.

so... i guess my overarching point is, "henry is like istvan" is correct in some ways, but i feel more that henry is a reflection of who istvan used to be and istvan is a reflection of who henry could become.

[vote-gaara]

2025 is the year of GOOD!!! FORTUNE!!!!

And to bless this post, here are some money and luck headcanons for Gaara.

Gaara doesn't get paid a very high salary for being Kazekage, however...this man has like zero bills. Basically everything but his food, entertainment and miscellaneous items are covered by the Kazekage's estate budget, his health insurance, his uniform budget (yes you get one as a ninja), and people offering him free/complimentary stuff.

Speaking of medical insurance, he has a plan that covers EVERYTHING health and dental related. No deposit, co-pays, fees or anything. The only exception is that the Land of Wind doesn't have great healthcare facilities due to under funding. Because of this, sand ninjas will often seek healthcare in different countries.

He doesn't have a great pension...mostly because when he was younger and filling out the paperwork, he wasn't concerned about his future and opted not to pay much into it. As he grew older he decided not to pay more into it because...

He has a crap ton in his savings...well, actually his chequing account. He doesn't have a savings account, just one very large chequing account he barely glances at.

That being said, he spends A LOT on clothes (though he likes to believe he doesn't!)

Some rare cacti he got at private auctions are like $10,000+

He doesn't donate money to many charities or to his village because he doesn't want people to think he's lobbying or bribing his community. If he does it, he'll donate anonymously or through a third party. He also donates A LOT of his time.

Always offers to pay for his friends' and siblings' dinners when they go out to eat together.

Shinki gets everything when Gaara dies. Although Shinki has the same financial stability as Gaara, he believes that his son would be able to distribute the wealth to various causes, without having as much backlash or criticism as if Gaara were to do so himself.

Gaara likes buying gifts for people and he does so often. He thinks he's bad at it, and in some cases...maybe he is...but when one of his gifts lands, it really is a hit and very meaningful to the recipient.

I could see Gaara and Kankuro going to a Casino together every year or so. Gaara may still be awkward around people, but he feels like the games are a good buffer to help him through interacting with people, and with Kankuro's help, he would actually be really good to chit chat with over the course of a game. Gaara isn't prone to addiction, and knows when to stop - perhaps even setting himself a general budget which he has no problem tapping out at when he goes over. Generally he enjoys the strategy of poker (and he has the poker face for it lol), but after awhile he misses the quietness of his home.

Now onto luck! Yeah, Gaara has terrible luck. I'm talking shit luck. They say the Kazekage line is cursed, and that very well may be true cause holy moly did he ever inherit a potent dose of the family misfortune.

He's not clumsy, but has weird accidents. Things seemingly leap out of the cupboard when he opens the door. Appliances break. People around him seem to get bad news every other week...He just can't seem to catch a break when he needs it most, and bad things will happen several consecutive times before things recede. Poor Gaara has the luck of a genuine curse.

During festivals, he used to stop and get his fortune read upon his siblings and friends insisting "it would be fun!" He doesn't go anymore. It is not fun, not for himself or the fortune teller....not that he believes in that stuff anyways.....

He believes in superstition and curses. He tells people he doesn't, that luck and curses and all that mystical stuff is ridiculous, but he believes, truly...after all, it is difficult not to have some kind of superstition living in such a mystic place such as a desert, with a rich oral history of hauntings, legends, cryptids and gods.

He rolls snake eyes constantly when playing dice. At first it was kind've humorous, then it got really weird, only to become accepted as an advantage that he rolls with. His siblings have even noticed, and when they play a dice game and Gaara goes to roll, his siblings always shout out in expectation, "snaaaake eeeyyyeesss!!!"

That's all! Good luck on 2025, everyone! And may good fortune find you!!!!

[entiqua]

I love your artstyle!! Do you have any tips for drawing?

thank you so much! i'm really happy you like it!!💗 as for tips, what i would say would change drastically depending on what kind you're looking for, but some very general ones:

draw what you love and want to see most, regardless of whether anyone else wants to see it. if you don't enjoy what you're drawing it'll never come out as good or genuine as something your whole heart and soul is in. i mean you'd think this would be a no-brainer but sometimes i've had to sit back and ask myself 'if no one was ever going to see this except me, would i actually spend time drawing this?' and i was surprised by the answer

that said, it is also completely valid if your motivation for drawing is to draw for other people! there have been plenty of times where i was too artblocked to draw my own ideas but was still able to draw commissions or gifts and enjoyed it simply because making other people happy with my art makes me happy.

don't get too caught up in having a consistent art style. in my experience this 1000% hinders you

having your sense of anatomy degrade over time without you noticing because you keep drawing the same types of characters is a very real thing! if this is a concern to you be sure to draw a variety

follow a billion artists that you like the art of and you will have endless inspiration injected directly into your brain every time you open social media

my favourite practical tip for those who draw at a desk: keep a small mirror next to you at all times. absolute game changer for quickly referencing hands

if you're drawing digitally, make the canvas huge! in my experience this lets you draw messier/faster and you can't tell at all when you zoom out. if you tend to get stuck spending unnecessary amounts of time micromanaging pixels (me💀) keep it zoomed out while drawing

related to the above point, messy drawings can have far more expressiveness in them than neat and polished drawings. nowadays i never do lineart and go straight from 'barebones stickman pose' to 'varying-levels-of-coherent sketch' and use that as my lineart. sweet freedom from the sketch-looks-better-than-the-lineart phenomenon

if your goal is to improve, then you really do have to scrutinize your art, figure out what you're not satisfied with, and commit the time to focusing on it. 'practice makes perfect' kinda rubs me the wrong way because of how much i've seen it interpreted as 'just draw everyday and you'll magically improve' but genuinely it won't get you very far if you don't actively think hard about what you're trying to improve and take the steps to do it. is this a hot take idk. also hand in hand with this, not every artist is trying to improve and you shouldn't feel bad for this! maybe you just wanna make a little headshot doodle of your fave blorbo and that's your only drawing goal ever. awesome. maybe you know your art has flaws but it's passable enough to convey what you want and you're perfectly satisfied with that. (this is the stage i'm usually at). also awesome!

don't hesitate to draw something because you think it's out of your skill level. the worst that can happen if you draw it is that it comes out terribly but you learned something and can always redraw it better in the future. the worst that WILL happen if you don't draw it is that you'll never draw it. and then it will sit in the back of your brain haunting you for years. it's not like i'm speaking from experience or anything aha

look up 'hand stretches for artists' and do them if you draw a lot unless you wish to summon the wrath of the carpal tunnel demons

of course, these may not necessarily work for you, and most importantly(!) these are coming from the perspective of someone who is primarily a hobbyist. some of this won't be practical for people who need to build an audience, maintain a consistent style for work, etc. these are just things that have personally helped me over many years of drawing :)

[galedekarios]

Can I ask where the dialogue about gale previously being a professor pre game events is

hello, anon! thank you for the question. the short answer is: there is none!

the longer answer is that as far as we know, he wasn't a professor before the events of the game, but only becomes one in one of his epilogue endings.

we do know gale is a wizard of acclaim and scholar of exceptional accomplishment:

Gale: Let's see. I hail from Waterdeep, the City of Splendours. I'm a wizard of considerable acclaim, and scholar of exceptional accomplishment. I have a cat, a library, and a weakness for a good glass of wine. And if the mood takes me, I'm known to try my hand at poetry. There.

it could mean a number of things of course, we don't exactly know because gale doesn't say what that entails for him, but he likely published works on his research subjects and it's also likely he's worked on spells with tara together since we do know that she invented the 'cat flap of displacement'.

we do also know that gale had pupils prior to the game, but not as a professor:

Player: Do you have much experience being a teacher of magic? I suspect so. Gale: I've had a pupil or two, but never for very long. Their ineptitudes tend to... irk me. Gale: You do seem to be a precocious talent though. I can always tell when I meet with a keen mind receptive to Mystra. Gale: Keep it up and she might just take a personal interest in you one of these days.

again, we know he wasn't a professor or he would've certainly mentioned it in his introduction, as well as it not being such a big part of his epilogue ending, showing his growth and making peace with himself. the way his files frame him becoming a professor also speak against him being so before the game:

This dialogue covers instances where Gale attends the Withers party in a human (non-god) form. His default state is that he returned to Waterdeep and became a professor of Illusory magic at his former school, Blackstaff Academy. General vibe here is that this is a Gale who's found peace with himself - he's a great teacher, one his students are mostly in awe of.

i think it's more likely he either tutored - as that is a very common practise in waterdeep, and even available to the lower classes:

or gale took on a wizard apprentice independently, which... i can sort of see happening. although, it seems he wasn't ready at that point. we can only speculate as to why. perhaps these pupils couldn't keep up with gale, who we do know has a brilliant mind that's always moving, perhaps he wasn't ready yet to take on such a great responsibility while romanticising the idea itself.

what we do know is that he likes sharing knowledge, he wants to impart wisdoms and teachings. not only do we notice that along the journey with gale as a companion, but it's also explicitly a wish revealed by the love test with zethino the dryad:

Zethino: Gale: the learned wizard. The charming gentleman. The walking apocalypse. Zethino: Listen. Think. If the wizard were given the choice, what food would he be? Player: A shiny red apple - wholesome as can be. Gale: Ah, the fruit of scholars. How I long to have a troop of loyal students grace me with apples by the orchard-full in exchange for wisdoms imparted... devnote: Pleased, briefly daydreaming

and that he does grow into his own in the epilogue, through his travels and experiences.

he becomes a great professor, whose students hold him in high regard and whose passion for the position is evident in everything he says during the epilogue.

anyhow, i hope that was helpful! 🖤

[burr-ell]

If it's alright, can I ask why you like the Golden Deer house more than the Blue Lions or Black Eagle houses? Like, what caught your eye about them over everyone else?

So I actually got into FE3H through a friend of mine, @dar-draws, who I already knew through mutual good taste (Dickkory), and fanarts like this one, this one, and this one plus the way she talked about Claude and Claudeleth caught my attention. I watched a couple playthroughs of the Golden Deer route on YouTube and absolutely fell in love (before finally getting a switch just to play it myself, for which I was violently bullied here). So like, I was already going into the game biased, which is part of why when I got it I went ahead and played through Golden Deer before doing all the other routes in turn; it was genuinely important to me to personally see all sides of the story. But even as I've played the other routes and replayed SS and AM and gained even more of an appreciation for them, I'm still always sort of drawn back to VW and the Deer.

I think it's ultimately vibes-based, but I'll try to articulate it. I'm not really a big fan of "cozy" sorts of games—I've played and enjoyed ACNH, but the things I most enjoyed about that game were finding things to do and goals to complete, like completing the main quest line or filling up the museum. So it's not so much that I find the Golden Deer to be cozy so much as adventurous. They're not inherently personally invested in the conflicts of White Clouds (they don't know Lord Lonato or Miklan, and their house leader isn't [gestures generally]), but they're also not just ping-ponging through the story. They go through the same events as the other two houses, but they're coming at it from more of an outsider's perspective, and their choice to get involved and react and respond feels more active.

The Deer also don't have any real reason to follow Claude, either, and in the early game they make sure he knows it; none of them are really all that concerned that they're speaking to the future Grand Duke of their country. Lysithea snaps at him, Leonie shoots the breeze with him, Raphael is jovial with him, Lorenz undercuts him, Hilda is blase with him, Marianne tries not to talk to him, and Ignatz gets into theological debates with him. Over the course of the game, they develop the same loyalty to Claude that the other house members already have for their leaders almost by default, and it feels a lot more earned because we see it happen. And that in turn makes scenes like the one at Myrddin, where Claude reveals his true goal of opening the border with Almyra and embracing foreign cultures and the other Deer are surprised but trust Claude and follow his lead, that much more satisfying.

I was a little surprised, when I played through the other three routes, that aside from the designated talking-with-the-cast scenes every route gets, the characters who aren't house leaders or retainers don't really have all that much to do in the story. On Verdant Wind, you pretty consistently have members of the Golden Deer appearing in other cutscenes and giving their two cents; there's even a unique scene where Lysithea realizes there's something up with the Empire's mages because of her backstory and approaches Claude and Byleth about it. It's nothing too obtrusive—they do still have to accommodate the potential for character death—but it's those small details that make a difference to me. Every house has a particular dynamic with odd silly quirks, but the Deer being just that little bit more integrated into the story really helps sell the idea that they belong here and they're making this story their own.

There's also the matter of where specifically their adventure takes them. I respect the choice to focus on Dimitri in Azure Moon, because it does handle his character and arc very well and I think also does the other Lions justice (with the exception of Dedue), but it's also focused largely on Dimitri's personal arc and the Tragedy of Duscur and doesn't really follow through on a lot of the events of White Clouds. (Which some Blue Lions stans have been okay with because they think the Agarthans are bad villains, which...that's valid, but stories still have to like, address plot elements they set up.) Verdant Wind, by contrast, does actually pull back and try to figure out the real impetus behind the whole conflict, and it ends with them beginning to properly lay Fodlan's true problems to rest.

So while the route isn't flawless and I do think there are issues with how characters are written that are part of larger trends within the game and the series as a whole, there's a very specific kind of fantasy adventure energy with the Golden Deer that I enjoy. I think the stories I'm most drawn to are the ones that keep their eyes on a specific goal but still make you feel like the characters would bring that same energy to goofing around with each other, and I think that's something Verdant Wind does very well.

[thenightfolknetwork]

Hello. I'm, um, not entirely sure how to talk about this. I hope it's okay if I misspeak. I'm a human, right, so I think that needs to be clear more than anything, but I've been very involved in the creature community for years now. I live by a great big lake and I always liked to walk down the shore late at night or early in the morning, you know, just to try and get out of my own head, and one night ages ago I accidentally tripped over someone's jacket and twisted my ankle. It was a gorgeous fur jacket, too, not like any kind of fur I'd seen in a jacket before, but just stunningly soft and thick as Hell.

Now, of course I didn't take it, that'd be awful, but also I had just hurt myself in kind of a nasty way and so it wasn't like I had anything else to do but sit by the shore next to the jacket and waited, and yeah, a few hours later one of the lake seals popped its head out of the water, looked at me for a good long while, and then...well, I mean, you know how the rest of the story goes, I'm sure.

Anyway, it's been a few years now and I've become really close to this family. I didn't really know anyone in my town before meeting them and I'm not on speaking terms with my own folks, so in a lot of ways these people have become my family, and it's an honor that they trust me to keep guard of their cloaks and such when they go out. But I've got this problem, right, and it's just...over the years it's felt less and less like I fit in with other humans. All my friends are nightfolk now, my family hates me even more because they're bigots--in this night and age, can you fucking believe it--and it's just like every night I get further and further away from the shore.

I'm just scared because...I don't *want* to stop drifting away. I've had dreams of joining them down there in the lake, practically every night for months on end. I've tried doing research into methods of joining the community but I don't want to become a vampire, I don't fancy any lunar-aligned nonsense, nothing has felt right except selkies, but I can't decide if I'm just self aware enough that I need a push from an outside viewer to try and accept something I already know full well...or if no, actually, that little voice in my stupid head that won't go away that keeps calling me a fraud, an invader, an appropriator--what if the reason it's not going away is because it's right and I really don't belong?

Just...please be honest with me. Am I a complete asshole for spending hours every day trying not to just outright beg my family--sorry, chosen family--to help me sew myself a cloak, or is there something to this?

First of all, reader, please rest assured. As long as you are speaking from a place of kindness and a willingness to learn, you don't need to worry about using all the correct terminology. I always try to listen generously when people come to me in need, and I encourage our followers to do the same.

Unfortunately I can well believe that bigots like your biological relatives still exist. I'm glad you've been able to extract yourself from their hateful society, and have found comfort, support and kinship among the nightfolk.

You say there is a little voice in your head calling you a fraud, casting doubt on the validity of your feelings. As much as you might want to push it away and stop your ears, I want you to listen to that voice, just for a little while. Pay attention to the language it uses and what ideas it seems to have about the world.

And then ask yourself: is this my voice? Does that sound like me? Or does this sound like a last, desperate, wriggling remnant of the people I've worked so hard to distance myself from?

Every one of us is raised with a narrative, a story about the world and our place in it, and how we should treat the people around us. We're told that story by our parents, by our teachers and schoolmates, by television and books and a million other sources. The story is so vast and so all-encompassing, it takes an enormous effort to be able to see any single part of it clearly.

Imagine, then, how hard we have to work to realise some of that story is untrue, or harmful, fed by hatred and fear. To start untangling ourselves from the rotting, strangling roots of the story we've known all our lives, and start planting something new and fresh and honest.

It sounds to me like this little voice is one of those lingering strands of the story you were raised with – one where liminality is nothing to admire or strive for, and where you cannot be trusted to know your own mind, and your own needs. It's time to tell yourself a better story.

You've found people who honour you with their trust and who make you feel supported and loved, as you deserve. You admire them, and want to be like them. None of this sounds “stupid” to me.

This is not a decision to be taken lightly. By all means, take your time, and talk your feelings through with your family. But I think you already know what story you want for yourself, reader – and for what it's worth, I think the world will be better for its telling.

[For more creaturely advice, check out Monstrous Agonies on your podcast platform of choice, or visit monstrousproductions.org for more info]

[thecheshireprincess]

General Info/Frequently Asked Questions

Hi! I'm Talia 👑, and i'm so happy you're here 🥰

Here is a list of FAQ that I get; please never ever hesitate to send me an ask or a message if you don't see what you're looking for here (or if you just want to chat) 💕 I absolutely adore hearing from you.

Do you have a Masterlist?

Yes I do, you can find it in my bio or linked here 💕

All of my series and collections have their own Masterlist:

The Game Itself

Princess of Diamonds

One Look Collection

Do you have a Tag List?

Since I enjoy writing many different types of stories (and also because I write a lot of NSFW content 😜), I keep my Tag Lists separate. These are the lists I'm currently working with:

○ Everything Tag List -> Everything that I publish

○ Chishiya Tag List -> All of my Chishiya stories

○ Niragi Tag List -> All of my Niragi stories

○ The Game Itself Tag List -> New chapters and one-shots set in The Game Itself universe

○ Princess of Diamonds Tag List -> New parts of Princess of Diamonds

If you don't see a list that pertains to what you're looking for, all you have to do is ask! For example, if you don't want to be tagged in smutfics, just let me know; I will never be offended. Your wish is my command 💕

Do you have preferred pronouns/how can I address you?

Yes! Thank you so much for always being respectful to me and others in our community when you speak to us 🥰 I am she/her/hers

You can call me by my name, Talia. I also go by:

○ Princess

○ Giiiiiirlllll (iykyk)

○ Koko

○ TC (Talia Corinne)

○ Biiiitch/that bitch/this bitch/a bitch

○ Dude

○ Bro

. . . or pretty much whatever you like as long as it is well-intended ✨️

I usually joke that you guys could hit me with a baseball bat and I would just be grateful that you're interacting with me 🤣 I just love you that much! 🫶🏻

Who do you write for?

The majority of my current stories are about Chishiya (he is my husband), second most somehow being about Niragi (aka Dori Sakurada). I am super open to writing for any character, tbh.

Other characters I have active WIPs for:

○ Aguni

○ Hatter

○ Kyuma

○ Kuina

○ Ann

○ Kuzuryu

But if you have someone specific in mind, don't hesitate to reach out! ✨️

Do you take requests?

Sure! I'd be honored to make your dreams come true. Send me an ask 🫶🏻

How often do you update?

I am trying to get on a set schedule now that I have so many stories (and even more ideas) going at once 💕✨️

Mondays: Princess of Diamonds

Thursdays: One Look Collection

Fridays + Saturdays: The Game Itself Universe

This means requests/random one-shots that pop into my head will probably come on a Tuesday, Wednesday, or Sunday.

Regardless, it is very unlikely that I go more than two to three days without publishing something. If I do, send a search party - I might not be alright.

Have you read the manga?

My AiB obsession started with the manga way back in the day (2010, was it?)! I love re-reading it when I'm not too busy, and you'll notice that I mix storylines/personalities from both the manga and the adaptation in my writing.

Except for Niragi - if I'm writing Niragi, it is Dori Sakurada I'm writing for, let's be honest. I would gladly murder manga Niragi, bring him back to life, and murder him again.

Do you ship any of the characters together?

I only ship Kuina x Ann - they are the air in my lungs and I wanted so much more from their relationship 🥹💕

I do, however, strongly believe Chishiya x Niragi belong together, though I prefer that they are both with me (at the same time 😜).

Do you belong to any fandoms aside from Alice in Borderland?

This is a fun one ✨️ Of course!

My very first fandom was probably Harry Potter, I'm sure you can guess that I am very much a Slytherin 🐍 with a very big Severus Snape and Draco Malfoy obsession

I also love:

○ Marvel (Loki, Bucky Barnes, Tony Stark, and Doctor Strange)

○ Star Wars (Din Djarin/Grogu, Obi Wan Kenobi)

○ Squid Game (In-ho specifically, sheesh 🥵)

I'm sure there are more, but these are my mains!

Will you ever write for a fandom other than AiB?

I don't really have a good answer for this. What I can say is that I've been writing (and not publishing) fanfiction for years and years so I do have stories in other fandoms; I just doubt I would ever publish them here. Maybe one day you will find me posting on a 👻 account?

Fun fact - my first ever smutfic was written about Loki 🐍💚

Do you have advice for new writers?

Absolutely 💕 My biggest piece of advice is to write whatever it is that YOU WANT TO READ. Every story I've written so far is because it was something I wanted to read and couldn't find. It makes it easier because you know at least YOU are invested ✨️ Otherwise, just write. Write. And write. And write.

Also, don't try to be perfect in your first draft, you'll get frustrated. Most of my stories start as bullet points 🤣🤭

If you ever have specific questions about this, please send an ask! I'm happy to help 🥰

What's up with your family situation?

My family situation comes up frequently around here because of my dark humor, my codependence on my brother, and the fact that the Niragi/Reader relationship in my series The Game Itself is based on mine and my brother's.

So long story short, I never knew my mom; she passed away when I was just a few weeks old. My brother Teron and I were raised by an absent and incredibly abusive father, up until the time that I was eleven. Teron was seventeen when he left home for the last time, ultimately receiving emergency placement of me after a particularly bad series of events. When he was eighteen, and after lengthy court and social service battles, he was finally granted custody of me. I lived with him primarily from when I was eleven until after I graduated college. I still see him at least once a week and call him every day. Our relationship is still very codependent, but we are working on it 🤭

I tell you this so that you can laugh along with our weird broken family when I share random tidbits, and so that you understand where the inspiration for TGI came from 💕 And maybe, just maybe, I can help someone else with a different looking family feel normal 🫶🏻✨️

[materassassino]

The Old Guard Dæmon AU

Probably done before, but I wanted to write one myself, so I thought I'd make a guide to the Guard and their respective dæmons, to go with the fic I just posted for it.

Andy: Hwehnto (Przewalski's horse)

Yeah, a wolf or some other predator might fit, but let's face it, the supreme horse girl should have a horse for a dæmon. *h₂weh₁n̥to- is Proto-Indo-European for "wind", butchered into a modernly comprehensible Hwehnto/Hwento. He is a very serious and stoic dæmon, much like Andy, but his outbursts of emotion are striking. He is vicious in battle and will not hesitate to attack both human and dæmon, if necessary.

I did also consider a tarpan for Andy, but there is literally one photo in existence of one. I generally assume that actually it would be some European wild horse so old it doesn't exist anymore, and we've lost all modern knowledge of it. So Przewalski's horse will do.

Quynh: Minh Nhat (white-lipped pit viper)

Of course our viper would have a viper! Small, quick and venomous. He doesn't have a name yet because, frankly, I don't speak Vietnamese and I want him to have a cool name like most dæmons have. His name is Minh Nhat, which means "bright sunlight", in contrast with Quynh's name. More outgoing than most dæmons, will talk casually with other humans, and is prone to little acts of thievery (thimbles, small nuts, little trinkets), mostly out of delight with the object than any malice. Very tiny! Likes spending his time tucked up Quynh's sleeve. Will not hesitate to bite a human should the need arise, but tucks himself in Quynh's collar or scarf when in battle.

I was torn between this and a red-headed krait, but ultimately went to an actual viper (well, pit viper, close enough).

Joe: Tayyib (scimitar oryx)

(Oddly difficult to find a photo of one alone, with no radio collar, that hasn't been shot by some bastard trophy hunter).

Tayyib (named that way for obvious reasons and chosen by Joe's mother's dæmon) represents everything poetic and artistic about Joe, and is calm and wise. Dislikes fighting, but will if he must: watch out for those horns! Yes, he is a male dæmon, a rarity, another commonality Joe shares with Nicky. I wonder why? A very good listener who gives good advice.

I don't know why I decided on another ungulate for this hapless team (can they even go anywhere?), but I did. I figured a desert antelope of some kind would be good for Joe, and it was a toss-up between this and an addax. I admit I chose it just for the name.

Nicky: Bonamico (Luzon bleeding-heart dove)

Geographically, it doesn't make sense. Symbolically? I had to. Bonamico is quiet, contemplative and kind, barely speaks except to Nicky, Joe or Tayyib, but is always concerned for those about him. He is far more nervous than Nicky, but stores a lot of knowledge, a trait he does share with Nicky. His favourite place to perch, other than Nicky's shoulder, is between Tayyib's horns (although occasionally he likes to sit on Joe's head). He does the scouting for the group, as the only bird dæmon.

This bird is the entire reason I made this damn AU. It's just too perfect. Look at this Catholic-ass bird!

Booker: Amandine (black rat)

*wheezing* I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I'm not sorry.

Now, the problem with dæmons is that we have rat symbolism, which is of rats as dirty and sneaky, but we're also modern human beings that know perfectly well rats are cute, intelligent and affectionate creatures that make amazing pets. Amandine herself is mostly just shy and quiet, although she does like it when she gets the chance to roast Booker, but then again, who doesn't? She is their little reconnaissance expert, being sent in to buildings and small places to chew through wires and spy. She, unlike Booker, is always supremely well-groomed.

I did consider a ferret or stoat, something a little more noble, but I personally do love rats so much and so I wanted a positive rat dæmon, for once.

Nile: Dakarai (red wolf)

I wanted to give Nile something supremely American, but she was in the Marines, and soldiers of most kinds tend to have dog dæmons, so no stereotypical birds. But Nile is also smart and quick-thinking, and family-oriented, so the red wolf made sense to me. Dakarai is loyal and far more serious than his human, a bit more cynical. Having been trained in a modern Armed Force, post-Geneva Convention, he's never touched another human being and has exclusively fought other dæmons. He is, of course, a good tracker.

Someone had to have a canine in this group. Might as well be Nile!

Bonus (under the cut for cockroach reasons):

James Copley: Vindemiatrix (common raven)

The Odin symbolism of the knowledge-seeker raven, honestly. She perches in odd places, watches everything, and reports back. She is a secret-keeper and prone to keeping her own counsel, not interacting much with other dæmons. She, like Copley, misses his wife and her Pallas's cat dæmon something fierce.

Stephen Merrick: Unnamed (American cockroach)

Need I say more? He deserves it.

Dr Meta Kozak: Unnamed (hagfish)

A disgusting dæmon for a disgusting woman, who burrows into people's bodies and eats them from the inside out. She carries the horrid thing in a lightweight tank backpack, one of the many modern accomodations for people with water-dwelling dæmons.

Keane: Unnamed (Eastern black rhino)

A beautifully noble dæmon, unfortunately wasted on a bastard.

Lykon: Unnamed (melanistic leopard)

She was graceful, majestic and courteous, and absolutely breathtaking in battle. She would dispense affection to daemon and human alike, much like Lykon himself.

[absolutebl]

Given the wide range of BL you've consumed and analyzed. I am curious at your perspective when comparing BLs made/written by men and those that were written by women, in a different direction, comparing BLs directed by men in comparison to women.

If you could have the time and give your perspective in this two sources of BL , that would be great.

Hum, I'm not sure how to answer this. Except in a kind of avoidance way because I question the premise.

I think, in general, in most of the film industry, the original writing has very little to do with the final result, because so many new voices and povs are imposed on it the moment it begins to be adapted. After a BL leaves its author (predominantly female) it goes to script, a writers room, and eventually into the hands of director and team. All those people are different genders (predominantly male). And all of them have a significant impact on the end result.

Sometimes the author has unprecedented influence (mame for example) but that's pretty unusual.

Statistically speaking, the origin IP (whether novel or graphic) is most likely written by a female and the resulting BL most likely directed by a male.

There are always exceptions, of course.

Even putting aside all the other people, mostly script writers, in between the two primaries (which I just don't think you can) it would be statistically challenging to draw any commonalities amongst female directors (since there are so few) or amongst male writers (for the same reason). In other words, we have many many examples of really only 1 of the 4 possible combinations, and all those examples are muddied by the nature of the filming process (not to mention the nature of gender).

In other words, it would be challenging for me to say things are generally preferable in any one version of the pairings.

I have liked BLs written and directed by women, written by a woman directed by a man, written by a man directed by a woman, or written and directed by men (although those last two I would struggle to name any BLs).

However, I have also liked and then disliked BLs from the same general team and combination of genders behind the creatives.

For me, at least, there doesn't seem to be a reliable team or a reliable writer or a reliable director whose BL product I will reliably love.

I would hesitate to place a predictor on my BL taste (or anyone else's) based on the gender of any part of the team behind a BL. That seems..... weird. Especially when queers and 3rd gender etc are involved (and we have always been involved in artistic spaces for as long as humans have existed, I suspect).

But then I feel that way about most entertainment, from music to books to plays to comedy to fashion. I can be a fan of a director's style but not like some of their shows, just as I can be a fan of an actor's performance but not the character they're playing, or a fan of a pair's chemistry but not in those roles, and so forth.

I think what youth and influencers and the internet age has forgotten is that it's okay to admire a creative individual and not slavishly adore everything that they produce. (For fuck's sake though, don't tell them that, you absolute troll.)

Creatives and creative teams also have their own taste, and that may conflict with yours. Especially with newer IP where you might want the same old same old and they need to evolved. Consumers of entertainment are remarkably resistant to creativity, innovation, and change (so oxymoronic) .

It's okay, maybe you'll like their next BL, song, book, painting, performance......

I have no idea how I got here but:

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

I do have some stuff on a queer lens here:

[spot-the-antisemitism]

This was from a video from a content creator that I generally (don't always agree with every take) like on Instagram. It was a 'humorous' video talking about the--I guess you can say hypocrisy--and slavery in the Bible* 

*Christian Bible, in the sense that some of the slavery lines referenced also mentioned Christ/Jesus though a lot of the passages/stories were "Old Testament" so.  Except I know you can't really do a clear cut between the Tanakh/Hebrew Bible and the Christian Bible given how much was stolen and appropriated. Debating whether to just link the vid itself ngl (not to dogpile or harass anyone, just to provide full context). 

I thought this was “accidental” Antisemitism, the kind that occurs when Christians / ex-Christians / Atheists try to criticize parts of the Bible and do so by criticising practices that are still followed by Jewish people. It just seems ignorant to me.

Of course, top comments were "well slavery and rape are fine but we can't eat shellfish". Which is stupid, because no generally speaking if you're Christian you don't follow those rules! Like, I'm not a Christian/not a practicing Christian (culturally Christian yes) but the explanation I always heard was "Jesus came and made it so we (Christians) don't have to follow those rules anymore". The “Old Testament” aka the stuff lifted from the Hebrew Bible, aka the stuff that has things like prohibitions on food, does not apply to Christians. 

Oh fuck I missed it the first time around. But the “character” in the skit actually says something along the lines of “God was cool with slavery but you can't eat bacon?” NO THIS ISN'T – FUCK THIS IS STUPID. 

Wait, no, the video gets worse. It's “Moses’ son getting circumcised was insane actually” in the comments by the creator.

The INTENTION was to criticize parts of the Bible and how questioning is discouraged in Christianity, but the result was just…*gestures*

I don't even really like Christianity, this isn't me trying to defend Christians, this is me going:

Saying the Old Testament was evil and bad and all that shit isn't really the dunk on Christianity you think it is, it's just furthering stigma against that tiny religious group that everyone forgets (aka Jewish people) and it's this weird veering into anti-theism. 

Just saying, if that's how you treat something you don't even follow from the Bible, excuse me for not assuming you'd be normal about people who do follow those practices.

This could have been a good video about how slavery was held up through Christianity in America and elsewhere, alas it was not that. It could have been about Christianity bleeding into laws, being used to oppress and as rationale for laws and practices at the expense of non-Christians / non Christian Fundamentalists or Evangelists. Alas it was not that.

The Video in Question: https://www.instagram.com/reel/DF9S0GlxwnU/?igsh

I could be more charitable about this vid, but I don't really want to be.

If you have the time, I'd love to hear your thoughts + if I'm completely off base, missing the point, and so forth.

ugh yeah I hate the implication that jews still secretly support rape and slavery. I actaully know conservative Judiasm very much doesn't approve those anymore

also I love that these people are eating shrimp to trigger christians when they ignore that and jews who explicitly don't expect goyim to follow these laws

"I ate shrimp and pork to trigger the monotheists" is super cringe actually

Also the idea that curcumcision is basically castration and therefore makes you less of a man is veering in the type of toxic masculinity that is entwined with transphobia and also mohels are not being locked up right now

[kier-fan-number-one]

my thoughts on the finale and the season in general

so! I was a little afraid, but the final episode is really incredible. I really like the pacing, the idea of communication between two Marks (I expected it and wanted it), a lot of fighting (it is very satisfying that another one of them was killed, Mark is the killer of security managers). like that they finally made everyone think about the question of how innies and outies must live from now on. visuals and music solutions are just great, especially this ending, taste!

personally, I was very pleased to see the impact Irving left on everyone. although of course I would have liked to see him in this series with everyone, but he probably really did not have a place here. as I said, Helly R - thank you for always remembering your friend Irving. but god forbid you authors if you don't bring him back next season!!!

Mark's final decision seems very logical to me. of course he did what he was asked to do - saved Gemma. now with her Devon, Harmony and the others can try to go against Lumon. Mark himself can be completely understood, he wants to use any last opportunity to be with the person he loves, even if he understands that it is a doomed situation. he does not have any normal alternatives and just literally does the same thing he did before with Gemma. they are one person.

and in general, if at the end of this season Mark and Gemma stayed together, it would be a very strange story with wrong conclusions. Mark buried Gemma, he mourned for her, he created his inny to take away the pain of loss. and then he really takes the first opportunity to return her, without assessing any risks, forgetting about the consequences of his actions. as it seems to me, he has to go through this path of loss like all of us do every day, not to burn the pain somewhere in the middle of himself, to live it and then live on. this is what I expect to see in the new season. and I'm still not sure if reintegration is really possible, but it really seems like the only way, unless one part of Mark doesn't agree to end his life on his own (although we know that's impossible, and any part of you will stay inside you anyway, because it was and is you).

what I don't understand is how easy it all actually was for all of them. although if you look at all the past episodes, you can see that Lumon constantly makes mistakes in assessing the level of danger to its existence, so okay.

and also, speaking of the season as a whole, I like it, a lot.....except for what they did with Irving's story in episode 9. all the characters as a whole developed logically, we now have more context for both the story in general and some individual characters that we didn't know anything about before. the only main character, about whom we did not learn anything new - outie Irving. and okay, Innie Irving's arc was great, I would understand that you have to wait for outie for the next season, if it wasn't for episode 9. why did they show it like it was the end of him? they left everyone else in a state where things keep happening to them in the middle of the story, except for Irving. if they are really going to bring him back, it would make more sense to stop the story at the cliffhanger "Irving gets in the Burt's car and we don't know where he's going to take him". in short, it scares me that he is the only one who looks like he was thrown out of the story. (and also Reghabi but I really hope they will return together because they work together). but the season itself gave us a lot of really cool episodes and scenes, and episode 4 is definitely my favorite of the entire show right now.

thank you, it was a pleasure watching it with you! let's sit here together and wait for the next season! I'm waiting for your art ❤️

[aromacaque]

Something I don't think a lot of queer people understand because the aro/ace community is very online-oriented is how little people actually know about aromanticism.

I feel like if you're predominantly in queer spaces (especially online) then of course you have at least heard of aro/ace identities, but IRL I have only met like 2 other aro people. Ever. In my entire life. Most people I meet tend to only know a little bit about it, or more than likely know nothing at all. Most people I meet have never met an aro person ever in their life (that they know of), and it Really shows. Because I think generally speaking most people know of other sexualities and trans people to some degree (i.e. gay, bi, trans). If they don't they definitely know of them. But that's not the same for aromantic people. So whenever I talk about myself, unless I explicitly give the label out to them so they can have a word to associate with my "abnormalities" or the things they think are strange (or even wrong) about me, then they just stare at me like I'm an anomaly.

I have been stared at like an anomaly. I have had many moments with people where me just being vaguely honest about my love life (or lack thereof) has been met with confusion and discomfort from the people around me. Multiple times where I can tell people are uncomfortable and HAVE A PROBLEM with me for either offhandedly mentioning I've never had a crush or just not having much of anything to contribute to a conversation regarding that stuff.

I have also had people claim they could be the exception or that they could "fix me." From both straight and queer people by the way.

My entire existence challenges so much of these people's concept of how social conventions work and so they immediately pinpoint me as being different.

To add to this, that feeling of alienation is very present in queer spaces as well. Being the only aromantic person in the room of other queer people, who claim to be accepting, yet you're always the afterthought? If even thought of at all? That's.. not really acceptance, is it? I don't think so.

I could get into more detail with this but the gist is that I've always felt more comfortable in queer spaces as a trans person than I ever have been as aromantic.

I genuinely don't think other queer people actually grasp how alienating and oppressive socially the experience of being aromantic is. They just see us as "basically cishet" or "QPRs are basically just dating!" when that couldn't be farther from the truth. The way I experience attraction is fundamentally different to the majority of the population, cishet AND lgbt sexualities combined. And it's really annoying to be treated as if we don't ever experience prejudice due to it.

[thehopelessexception]

is it just me?

i've been observing a tendency surrounding women —mostly between 20 and 26— where we can't find anything close to love (from men). women are not dating, nor living a normal life, developing a femcel-like point of view. and im saying this because i want to be loved just like anyone else, but are we the problem? or is there something wrong with boys? i mean, ofc there's something wrong with boys; but every year pass by and every time is harder and harder to find someone willing to put the effort to make you feel loved and understood. was it like this 50 years ago? 100 years ago? i am very much aware that our mothers and grandmothers suffered in the world they lived in, generally with sexist husbands and mandatory tradwife lifestyle. but i am also sure that there was some exceptions, way too many more than today.

and we tend to romanticize the past, probably there's something to do with our generation. nor millennials or gen z, the ones in the middle. the girls who grew up with enough technology but not so much. the ones that went crazy over boybands and fanfiction and hung up posters in our walls. the ones that went crazy in 2018-2020 with deranged feminism just to realise, later on, nobody really cared and it maybe was a little over the top. the ones that filled our beds with stuffed animals repeatedly every time we woke up just to throw them on the floor at night so we could sleep. the girls who spent their teenage years on tumblr writing code (before men took that away from us) and making playlists of marina lana and the 1975 so everyone on the internet could see how cool we wanted to look like. probably the ones that suffered some kind of bullying in highschool or some health problem related to how we didn't fit in or how bad we looked at ourselves in the mirror (yk what i mean). we weren't the cool kids in real life or it was just me?

now i'm observing how hard it is to adapt that teenager to adult years. and maybe it's me but i don't feel like an adult. i am a tiny ball of anxiety. i suffer too much stress. i am trying to finish my degree but i don't know if im worthy of anything because i dont have money, and i don't have time to work and study at the same time because i spend too many time thinking about it and feeling a fraud and a failure.

i don't know how to talk to boys either —nor girls, in that way—. and until some days ago i was quite sure i was willing and capable of spending my whole life alone. i've given up to anything because i felt it imposible to be loved. but lately my mind goes up and down with that scene of jo monologue in little women by gretta gerwig. and it also goes with the hot priest monologue of fleabag. and today i rewatched the classic he's just not that into you. are we condemned to be the tedious rule? am i?

i've seen all of my girlfriends suffering the same mysery. and i've seen the extremes. women giving up the love they deserve —because they accepted the fate of being the rule— by dating a jerk just because they are afraid of loneliness. and i've also seen women giving up everything else just because they are not willing to give up love. those are us. hopeless romantics who watched way too many romantic comedies and somehow still expect to find someone willing to die for us just like dicaprio in romeo + juliet. —or at least a patrick verona—.

what i've never seen was actual love. all the couples i met... they don't look happy. they don't look in love. they don't look like they enjoy their own company even. they look exactly like a picture of instagram. they exist just to make us feel miserable even when it's obvious they are not gonna last. i've seen couples of what? 7 years? gone. broken up. they grew tired of each other and of course they never looked like they had anything close to sparkles in their eyes. chemistry? none. and maybe it is my anxiety speaking but i don't want that. i refuse to have that. i want all or nothing. i want always and forever. i want everyone to look at us and think "if i don't have that i'll kms". i want family —even tho im not sure i want to get pregnant, what am i a childbride?—. i don't want to change anything to fit in with the standards of a boy. i want marriage even tho im not sure i want to be legally married. i want the posibility, the future. i want the emotions surpassing myself. i want to not know me anymore and then knowing me again. i want to doubt myself. i want my heart beating so fast i could kill someone for them. i want to believe god exists. i want to laugh of happiness without they making a joke. i want my sundays to not be deppresing because i can hang out with the love of my life and have fun. i want to be the "and yet" of someone willingly enough to fall for me every single day even if i am kinda insane all the time. i want someone who cares. someone who fantasizes with spending the rest of their lives with me and is going to put the effort to get to know every single thing about me and stay because he's blown away. and aparently that's setting the bar "too high" because we are the rule and not the exception.

people always assume that by being a romantic i expect flowers every day and cheesy comments about how beautiful i look; and that would actually make me want to puke because i can do that myself. i am confortable with myself, i like myself, i love myself, i have the ego. i am not really asking for that much i just want someone to love me with every single thing that's probably wrong with me. what i want is someone curious and smart. someone who pays enough attention or wants to. i want the chemistry off the roof.

and contrary to anyone's beliefs the bar is too low about everything else. every single girl probably wants the same thing. is it that hard for men to understand that women want to feel loved?

lately —worldwide— it's all a competition of genres as if humanity doesn't need us to interact to survive. it's a loop that opened up in 2013? with the tumblr-4chan gate and right now got translated to the real world because pick-mes are back and being a man is cool. and suddenly that's how nature works!! because apparently women are boring and just a hole. maybe they all need to go all alexander the great. but it's getting boring. and we as women deserve love as much as respect.

[melrosing]

how do you see an AU where Joanna survives and her relationships with her children?

been thinking about this ask whilst eating spaghetti

I think it's a mess with all three. first of all, supposing Joanna survives Tyrion's birth, she also survives to seal the deal with the Princess of Dorne in sending one of the twins off to Sunspear to be betrothed.

and whilst I kind of like 'jam growing up in Dorne' aus, I do think it would most likely be Cersei who gets shipped off. that's namely because in taking Cersei, the PoD reserves Elia for marriage to Rhaegar (I'm sure she was biding her time for that), and in the same fell swoop removes Cersei as her competition (Cers would probably have ranked quite highly before Tywin and Aerys' falling out).

obvs Joanna would be conscious of that calculation on the PoD's part, but 1) she may not necessarily have had the same ambitions for Cersei as Tywin did, and 2) at this particular point Joanna probably needs the betrothal of one of her children to a Martell more than PoD does; she wants the twins separated, but they're still very young at this stage so she would want them in safe hands - and she was once close to the PoD, possibly saw her as an elder sister/mentor figure of her own. so a Martell betrothal is the safest way she can do this, and Cersei would be the one the PoD would offer to take I reckon

so Cersei is forced out of her home at a young age, and I think that could be pretty interesting in terms of Tywin and Joanna's marriage for one thing. like, I assume Tywin would resent two women going behind his back to betrothe his daughter when he expressly had plans to give her to Rhaegar. is he able to put a stop to it?? I think Joanna would insist on it, but that would cause a bit of a rift because Joanna isn't explaining WHY and maybe it's the first time he feels she's crossed a line in her role as his wife.

I ALSO think that if Joanna were to survive Tyrion's birth, some part of Tywin would blame his son's disability on Joanna. in killing Jo, Tyrion martyrs her, but if she survived then it's like she's somehow responsible in Tywin's fucked up mind. bc I don't think he could fathom having had anything to do with his son's conception himself if the son wasn't what he'd wanted. so generally yes I see their relationship being worse and probably more distant with fewer visits from KL.

ANYWAY I digress but thinking about where this situ leaves Joanna and her relationship w her kids!!

JAIME starting with Jaime cos I think this would, relatively speaking, be the most straightforward. I think of the Lannister siblings, all the key Lannisters generally find Jaime the easiest to love and I don't think Joanna would be an exception. I think she's absolutely the kind of mother who would love her sons better, because as a woman she doesn't take such a complicated and visceral view of them as she does her daughter.

HOWEVER she would of course recall what happened between Jaime and Cersei. and I think she would low-key blame Cersei. I think Cersei, whilst charming in her own way, was no doubt a kid who could be angry and sour and difficult to handle, whilst Jaime sounds comparably quite affable and easygoing. so the first fucked up thing Cersei and Joanna's relationship is that Jo decides Cersei is the one who came up with the 'game' so that she can mentally forgive Jaime, because it's easier than reckoning with her son being less than perfect.

and I think the result with Jaime is that he resents Joanna deeply for sending Cersei away, and he dislikes that she keeps trying to acquit him of what they were both doing, and consequently distances himself from her. I imagine them as close before that, so this hits Joanna hard and she turns that resentment on Cers, again making their relationship worse.

possibly the relationship between them heals a little as Jaime grows matures and maybe realises how upset Joanna must have been at the time, but I think he is always angry for what she did to Cersei and doesn't forgive her that.

CERSEI I imagine Cersei stays in Dorne till she's maybe 12-13, and then maybe is made lady in waiting to Elia in King's Landing. and I think she spends the whole time hating Joanna. like I kind of doubt that Oberyn and Cersei would like each other much, and Cersei would always remember she was supposed to be Rhaegar's Queen, and Dorne sucks etc and where's Jaime, and also just like imagine how traumatic to be seven and sent away to some strange place for doing something you didn't even really understand was wrong. of course she'd hate Joanna

I think she only comes home to the Rock intermittently from Dorne, and Joanna is subtly antagonistic to her every time in case Cersei 'corrupts' her son again + Cersei is probably antagonistic in return because Joanna is the one who ruined everything, so it's all fucked. Joanna probably still tries to temper her daughter into the lady she thinks she should be, and Cersei is just not having it. it's awful

TYRION I feel like there's two Schools of Thought (lmao) on how Joanna and Tyrion's relationship would be: one where Joanna dislikes her son but is just more tactful about it than Tywin, and one where they're actually close and Joanna fancies him a bit of a mini-me.

I think it could be BOTH. I think Joanna, who no doubt cares a great deal about her public image and is still v much a Lannister who somehow had it in her to love a man like Tywin (to whatever degree she did), would be disturbed at having birthed a disabled child and would never quite shake that. it would haunt her forever.

BUT Tyrion is smart and funny and desperately wants to love her and be loved by her, and I think she would respond to that with a love of her own. I think she'd try to raise him up beyond what everyone else thought of him, and there'd be a lot of whispering in one another's ears. but she can't raise him up beyond what she, deep down, thinks of him, and that's a bitter truth in their relationship all Tyrion's life. I think she punishes him more harshly than she would Jaime, and is less willing to tolerate any shortcoming in Tyrion - he has to be better in every sense he can be. so there are darker periods in their relationship with Joanna is crueler to Tyrion, and it utterly fucks with his head because he knows how warm she can be when she chooses to be and he doesn't know how to win her love back, it's just like one day she warms again and things are nice once more but he always fears her turning cold again

and I think a big part of this is Tywin blaming Joanna for Tyrion - I think she'd find that hideously unfair, but perhaps also believe it a little.

ANYWAY long post and this is a huge amount of conjecture but long story short I think Joanna is fucked too

[mildmayfoxe]

big fan of your romance novel complaint posts (love to see a fellow hater living it up) but i’m also curious if there are any you would recommend? not looking for anything in particular, just would love to hear your thoughts as someone else with nitpicky reading habits and a taste for trash

ok hello. i left you hanging for a FULL week and for that i am sorry but i wanted to be able to have some time to sit down and type out a real answer to which the short version is YES of course there are several that i have enjoyed!! my disclaimer is that i almost solely read gay romance so if you are looking for lesbian or even straight reccs i don't have much for you (although i will put a couple at the end anyway). hopefully something in this list is interesting to you or at least interesting to someone else! links are mostly to goodreads. break bc i'm gonna write too much

-kj charles is one of my fave authors in this genre bc they're all pretty reliable and there's a ton of them. they're all historical fiction and usually there's at least one murder- she's good at keeping a plot going while developing a romance. often supernatural or magical elements. sometimes cults! i've read almost all of the books she's written and have enjoyed them all

-charlie adhara wrote a really incredible werewolf series that i loved, the first of which is the wolf at the door. this is one of the only series i've read which keeps the emotional stakes up through the whole thing & kept me interested in a relationship after it was established bc sooo many series get boring the second the leads get together. i actually read the first book of the spin-off series (a pack of lies) first which is technically possible but i don't recommend bc i was like "wow they're really throwing me in here. i love it" and then i read the first series and i was like "oh i was supposed to know all this stuff." but i actually liked the dynamic between that couple better and i'm suffering every day because the next one still doesn't come out til 2025 and i read it in 2022. also worth noting that this (the original series) is cops-ajacent (~federal special agents~) and one of the characters is really prejudiced at the beginning & imo doesn't have enough character growth before it's waved away but if you can ignore that it's really good. mysteries! werewolves!

-speaking of werewolves (i could suggest several but i'll keep it to two) tj klune's wolfsong ends up at the top of a lot of gay werewolf novel lists (i'm keeping tabs) and there's a good reason. i enjoyed it a lot. made me kind of sad which is always a good sign to me. the writing voice was very fresh and novel at first but i did find it a little grating by the end so i've put off starting the second book in the series (it's also about a different couple which was disappointing) but i will get around to it. i enjoy tj klune in general although his recent stuff has a very different vibe than this and lightning struck heart is very 2015 in a bad way imo

-bone rider by j fally is a standalone that really delighted me. the russian mob? aliens? vaguely western? possession? throuple? it's got it all. very fun

-ok speaking of westerns there's this other series called magic & steam (yes it's steampunk. sorry. it's very silly) that starts with the engineer. a federal agent is sent to a town to apprehend a ~madman engineer~ except he runs into an infamous outlaw in the process. and the outlaw is really sexy. and probably why i enjoyed the series so much. the series also keeps them apart a lot in a way that i enjoy- i love when things take a long time. it's ongoing so this is another one that i keep checking for updates on

-i've read a lot of stuff by nr walker and they tend to be VERY hit or miss for me but one of my faves is evolved which is almost pure smut. it's about a sex robot that gains sentience. what more do i need to say. she also wrote a three-book series about an amnesiac that made me cry cry cry. and her cowboy (australian rancher) series is pretty ok. i could go through a list and tell you which novels of hers aren't worth it and which ones are good; i've read most of them

-salt magic skin magic by lee welch was a big surprise to me. cool magic, good folklore, fairies in there too. historical. big kj charles vibes which makes sense bc she edited it. welch also wrote a book called seducing the sorcerer which i had more mixed feelings about but had magic in it that i think about OFTEN (the horses)- that one's about an imposing sorcerer and a rundown groom cum handyman. and they're in their FORTIES!!! 🥳🥳🥳 (i love when books are not about 23 year olds)

-another one with a magic system i enjoyed was magician by kl noone. this was the first book i read by this author and i liked it but generally i find their books are too "nice" for me. i'm in the middle of one right now that i started months and months ago that i keep trying to go back to and it's sooo rough for me. but this one and the twelfth enchantment are pretty ok

-emily tesh wrote a duology of silver in the wood and drowned country that i loved because i am suuuuch a sucker for a wild man/green man story. really good. haunting! evocative! kj charles has a green man story too which was actually the first thing i read of hers (spectred isle)

-i complained about the monsterfucker book i was reading a while back but despite that i will also recommend the series it's from: lily mayne's monstrous, which starts with soul eater. are they messy? yes. are they repetitive? yes. are the monsters usually disappointingly humanoid? yes. are a lot of them about the military? also yes. so we're starting off on a bad foot. but the world building is interesting and there's LOTS of kinds of monsters and most of them were pretty fun. the one i just read (#7) was the worst one of the bunch though imo. and i have problems with #6. but 1 2 and 5 were good

-ok i should do a quickfire round. honeytrap: about two enemy agents during the cold war. put it off for a long time bc i didn't love that but it takes place over a VERY long period of time which is always interesting to me. zero at the bone: about a hitman who needs to protect a witness to a mob hit. really strong start but fell off a bit in the middle to the end imo.

-you'll notice a lot of these have subgenres of like fantasy historical supernatural etc but here's some regular contemporaries. a lot of these are about sad guys bc those are my favorite. best laid plans: hardware store owner helps a guy fix his house. in the middle of somewhere: same author actually. guy moves to small town to work at a college. mr jingle bells: this is a christmas one. bad title. fake dating. part of the reason i think i liked it so much is because i expected it to be awful but it was actually pretty good. good emotional stakes. published 2021 but feels very 2014. ignore that part. work for it: i rated this five stars but actually don't remember much what it was like. i think they were both really sad which i love. give me big emotions and i eat them right up with a spoon. i should read it again

-OK now i've got some straight & lesbian options. talia hibbert's brown sisters series is good and cute. she also wrote work for it, above. the unhoneymooners is the first real Romance Novel that i read and it really surprised me because i had fun! previously i had kind of written off romance novels as not for me but this kicked off a reading habit that is still going strong (primarily reading romance novels). i read this in 2020 so it might not be as good as i remember. as for lesbian options olivia waite has a series that i enjoyed that's also historical, and a friend of mine really enjoyed delilah green doesn't care (but i haven't read that one myself). and while not really romances i will always be a sarah waters fan: you may recognize her as the author of fingersmith, which is the novel park chan-wook's movie the handmaiden is based on. if you haven't seen the movie or read the book i recommend both. her books are very dramatic lesbian historical fiction; they don't always have happy endings but they're all very good

ok i think that's the end! regular disclaimer that romance is generally not a genre notable for Good Writing so a lot of these are just things i had fun with or just stuck out in my memory for having fun conceits etc. i can't guarantee that any of these are actually good, especially because this is a list solely based on my own taste and bad memory. would love to hear anybody's thoughts and/or if anybody has recommendations for ME!!! this post took me over three hours to write! crazy!