#octolingkith

[shredded-feathers]

Being psychological therian, spiritual otherkin, and other-hearted is great because there’s just something so poetic and beautiful about being able to say I’ve got the mind of a cat, the soul of a fallen angel, and my heart is with the octolings

But then at the same time all these identities are stuck in this human body and it just kinda sucks

But then there’s the gender dysphoria so it’s like my body isn’t happy as itself either

No part of me is really against the other in the end. I’m just doing my best and in a way that’s kind of sad but cool

[shredded-feathers]

Found this interesting, so wanted to rb. I feel each of my IDs are slightly (or very) different…

As a cat therian, I lie on 0E6 Amber. I think the extremes in the metal shifts make it feel more detached, and my dysphoria fluctuates a bit depending on how bad the phantom shifts get (my hind legs have been an issue as of late)

As a fallen angel, I’d say I’m at 0G5 Green. I always feel somewhat shifted as an angel, but I do have some times where the phantom shifts are more prominent. As for dysphoria, I feel this body is just a vessel for what I really am, so it doesn’t matter to me that it doesn’t match (not that I wouldn’t take up a chance to have one that reflects my “true form” in a heartbeat, but I’m content knowing I’m me inside of me… if that makes sense). I identify very little with being human, but only because I’m living a human life as part of my trial

As an octolingkith, I’m at about a 0C1 Yellow. I don’t necessarily identify as an octoling, but I feel I should be one or be among them. I get dysphoria over my bones and my lack of the two pointy teeth octolings have. I think it feels somewhat integrated into who I am because of how much it can affect me during a bad phantom shift, and how much it hurts to not live in inkopolis

This exercise kinda helped me analyze and understand myself better (and was also a good distraction from the intense octo-shift that’s making my face bones ache 🙃)

Felt like experimenting with the idea of a spectrum to describe the phenomena of nonhumanity or related things, as only having labels to work off of has its pitfalls when so many overlap. And so, the KINsey scale was born. Intended to be used per each identity/kintype. Feel free to reply or reblog with your own personal codes! My bonobo type is 3E-F5orange (tho that does fluctuate a bunch). Further explanation of my reasoning behind this....

I can't help but notice there are millions of new terms being coined every week, because what we already have is clearly unsatisfactory for many. And the differences between a of the popular labels are very blurred and overlap a bunch, sometimes to the point of being functionally the same! For example the element of choice for otherkin however small, especially for the psychologically inclined, means you could be fretting about whether you're kin or otherhearted or otherlink or something else entirely. When it shouldn't matter that much. And with the more popular labels comes an implied hierarchy with classic otherkin/therian being at the top, and its cousins being lower down.

Classic otherkin especially, need to adhere to a particular narrative. Or else they're "delegated" to being hearted or something. To fit in. So increasingly I and some others have been thinking of ourselves as being "animal people", just animal people (replace animal with anything else that fits, fairy etc), a species first approach if you will. There are endless backstories and reasonings for why we are the way we are, but the result is the same. It allows for greater personalisation when you're like "I'm an x-person, and this is how". If your identity straddles the line between involuntary and voluntary, or if it was a sudden thing in your 30s rather than childhood, there's no pressure to pick a term and adhere to its norms. You're an individual and no less a real x-person than someone who has been struggling with something they've had no say in since toddlerhood. I'm a bonobo person, therian is the most convenient wordage but my backstory doesn't really tell you whether I really mean it, only how I got here. I don't always conform to the expected narrative.

Of course, I understand people also enjoy having labels, so I'm not hinting at removing them altogether. But spectrums supplementing those could be a viable compromise imo. I'm kinda dubious that we really need so many microlabels and umbrellas when it's already so muddy. It means you need to study what all of these are and have the memory of a computer in order to know wtf someone is talking about. If we prune that a little bit, it may allow for more legible communication.

[shredded-feathers]

When I first started exploring my non-human identity, I placed more importance on certain identities than others

There was a sense of urgency in my fallen angel identity, because I felt such a great and immediate need to fix myself before the end of this life, so I prioritized it. My cat identity came second, because the shifts are so strong. Third was my octolingkith identity, because I honestly didn’t know what to do with it or what exactly it meant to me

As I’ve learned from others in the community and grown into my identities, I’ve seen them more and more as equal parts of myself, and each important in their own right. Though I’m not an octoling, I still research to learn more of who I feel I should have been and do what I can to alleviate the feeling of wrongness my physical humanity imposes on me. I’ve been connecting with my cathood more and not trying to force myself to do angel-related work while shifted, and I no longer dread or am annoyed by my cat brain

As for the angel stuff, I’m trying to cut loose and live a little more. It was kind of disrupting my normal life for a little bit. I’m still way more critical of myself than I was before (which I don’t really see as a bad thing), trying to pinpoint everything that could be preventing me from reaching Lady Selene. Really, I think I tried to take on more than I could handle all at once—with that thought, I get the sense that this is why Guardian Gloria has made attempts to halt my progress—so I’ve tried to slow things down, especially when it comes to depressing or stressful revelations

With these changes, I’ve felt more… complete. Like I’m closer to myself than I’ve ever been before. I think it’s impossible to really be myself, inside and out, but I can find contentment with just being a bit closer

[shredded-feathers]

I’m trying to make more progress angel-wise but I’ve been so heavily cat-shifted that I started to question if I even was an angel and now I’m very concerned over the fact that I have bones

What I did manage to get done was more research on hellenic polytheism so I now have a direction and am starting some practice regarding that

I prayed to Lady Selene the other day so hopefully She knows I’m aware of and trying to return to Her. I’m going to be devoted to Her, but plan to incorporate Lady Hecate and Lord Apollo into my practice as well, and maybe more

Feeling less and less uncertain as I unlearn the things I was taught in my upbringing. I’m going to try for a more traditional practice but I still won’t be able to do much until I’m out of this house

Anyway I don’t like my finger bones hitting the screen and I need to find a way to scratch my eyebrow without touching my head bone so that’s all for now

[shredded-feathers]

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════ Tundra ════

gendergilen

faunpronomial

asexual akoiabroromantic

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╭────

│ ┊ Echo

│╭────────────╯

││• creature type : domestic cat therian

││• shift types : phantom, mental, sensory

││• gender experienced : neutrois

││• attraction experienced : esticue

││• pronouns : sey/seyr

│╰─────────── · · · ·

╭────

│ ┊ Cyrus

│╭────────────╯

││• creature type : angelkin

││• shift types : integrated, phantom

││• genders experienced : proxvir, androgyne

││• attraction experienced : aevial, celiangeitia

││• pronouns : lo/halo, he/him, it/its

│╰─────────── · · · ·

│ ╭────

│ ┊ Chomp

│╭────────────╯

││• creature type : octolingkith

││• shift type : phantom

││• genders experienced : boyflux, sanitix

││• attraction experienced : achillean athenian

││• pronouns : he/him, they/them

│╰─────────── · · · ·

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════ Other ════

╭──────────────

││• no DNI; will block

││• has eaten cat food

││• owns several collars (not sexually)

││• not a system or role-play

││• no discourse

││• not cringe (probably cringe)

│╰─────────── · · · ·

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