#oc: adrian kaldaver

[idrisofficial]

which oc is a serial apologizer (i’m not projecting or anything literally what are you talking about)

HAHAHA?

adrian and zuri, but adrian is far worse.

zuri at least is comfortable in her existence as a noble and while she has an inferiority complex, that’s mostly in relation to the other very powerful people around her. propaganda has done enough for her that she still subconsciously acknowledges her innate superiority over the vast majority of the idrisian population. she apologizes a lot to her peers and her superiors.

adrian, on the other hand, apologizes to everyone, which makes his inferiority complex worse than it started out. he barely believes in his right to exist as a human being at all, let alone his right to be one of the most important people in the country. he apologizes incessantly to his peers and his only superior (brinne), but also to lesser nobles and advisors and even servants, which in itself reaffirms everyone's disappointment in him. vicious cycle, baby!

[idrisofficial]

ok that last reblog got me thinking. i think adrian has white woman steamy romance taste tbh. it’s his guilty pleasure. like he has all these books about halcyonist doctrine and academia and plenty of propaganda filling his shelves. but none of that is really what he takes joy in reading. nah. he just wants 300 pages of slow burn will-they-won’t-they with a healthy dose of smut that barely borders on anything really interesting.

[idrisofficial]

📻 adrian <3

mm, i think “vanilla curls” by teddy hyde is a really underrated song on his playlist. there are a lot of fantastic brinndrian songs on both his and brinne’s playlist, but this one encapsulates a lot of their dynamic that goes beyond their hopeless mentally ill qualities. it’s a little like angel of small death and the codeine scene, but more of a dreamy kind of sexy.

this start of the first verse has some really powerful inner monologue, and i think captures specifically adrian’s reverence for brinne. his position as the high priest and brinne’s position as the monarch lends itself inherently to some worship of her, but obviously in their relationship it goes far past a religious or political kind of admiration. in particular I like the blend in these lyrics between the mental and physical attraction. he’s constantly battling with the moral transgression of his attraction to her, but can’t help feel overwhelmed by it when he sees her.

love all of the rhyme here. it’s about the sex and also the constant doubt in their relationship. write that down

thissss is the center of it. “she caught me by the ear and left me lying here writhing in fear” is a pretty accurate description of their relationship from adolescence until the present. during their teenage years, brinne was always pushing their boundaries further and becoming more intense while adrian just sort of had to deal with it. he was willing to clean up her messes, but the fact that she made so many in the first place was frightening to him, especially when it pertained to the secrecy of their relationship. now, adrian has to cope with the fact that brinne had such a huge effect on him as a person and he hardly knows how to exist without her now that she is withdrawn and ignoring their history. adrian is so deeply and madly in love with her and there is nothing he can do about it. literally nothing.

“instant kindred inhibition / a kiss then distance / it isn’t over, let’s call it / an infinite intermission” RRRAHHH it has brinndrian written all over it. this is exactly what their relationship is now. neither of them know how to handle their feelings and illicit relationship with the pressures of governing the country and approval from others mattering more than ever. they can’t quite abandon each other, but they’re both too afraid to really devolve back to sex and romance again. it’s an infinite intermission (which is only occasionally interrupted by desperate sex in the chapel).

[idrisofficial]

21 for brinne and adrian!

What common etiquette do they disagree with? Do they still follow it?

oh this is a fantastic question for them! thank you for the ask, you chose a good one :)

brinne: she hates the culture of bowing. doesn't like being bowed to, doesn't like bowing herself. the custom of bowing before and after noble conventions (meetings, dinners...) always gets on her nerves, and doesn't sit right with her when she knows everyone in the room would be all too glad to trample her corpse. the only occasion in which she doesn't really mind it is when it's for a prolonged moment of silence at the church altar. but she has to be alone in doing it, or it makes her feel itchy with dread.

adrian: i guess i'm not sure if this qualifies as common etiquette, but for the high priest of idris, it's a pretty basic function of daily life. adrian has to do a whole fucking lot of public speaking, and it sucks. he's never actually told anyone this, but he thinks the whole system would work a lot better if the high priest had some kind of associate or representative who spoke for them, and he only had to do private study and ritual leading. he's learned to handle--although barely--church services for the other nobles. when he has to give statements to the public or oversee any national holiday observance? forget it.

[idrisofficial]

🐁 for ask game :3c

🐁 Capybaras are friend-shaped. What shape does your OC have?

brinne is just spooky shaped tbh. girl is honestly the essence of halloween and good for her.

adrian is catholic shaped. i will not elaborate.

[idrisofficial]

WOOO FINALLY DONE WITH THOSE ASKS

geules

1 for zephyr

2 for rowen and adrian

3 for grace

4 for lennox and rowen

5 for adrian

1. Does your OC have any experience in the military? Perhaps they come from a long line of soldiers or army leaders? Or were they conscripted or press-ganged into an army at a young age? If they have not had a formal position in an army, then what is their view of the military mindset and hierarchies they have observed?

idris is the kind of fucked up where the public education system ends at 13 years old so that teens can be conscripted into the military, and zephyr happened to be part of the unlucky population to be drafted. his experience was…anything but pleasant. making good friends was never really his strong suit, so he ended up with some shitty acquaintances who more or less ordered him around to do their bidding. he also took one of his military mentors as a fucked up surrogate father figure, which really burned him when he was discharged after less than a year of service because of his explosives accident. it also instilled a lot of really harmful, nationalist sentiments in him which he’s still working to unlearn. zephyr in canon time is only 15, but he has a whole lot of military trauma attached to him from only a few months as a soldier.

2. Does your OC believe in the concept of a "just war" or do they believe that all conflict is to be deplored? Could they conceive of a justifiable reason for one nation to invade another - perhaps to free an oppressed people or prevent the development of a dangerous technology? Or would they only support a war of defence against an aggressor?

rowen: rowen is absolutely in favor of a just war. growing up in idris has taught her nothing if not that authorities will only suppress any form of subtle resistance, so violence and war are really the only way forwards to a better future. it’s easy to see how she’d already internalized this by her teen years by the fact that she opted to burn down her reform school at 15 rather than make a simpler plan of escape (also says something that evander let her!). rowen believes in a pretty black and white fashion that violence is always justified against tyranny.

adrian: adrian thinks of war in very removed, political terms. his only personal connection to the concept is through artemis’s rebellion, which he fears and deplores because he’s been propagandized against political dissidence from birth. war, to adrian, is a last resort to be taken when diplomacy between two countries has unequivocally failed and cannot be reconciled. in adrian’s eyes, civil war is pretty much never justified because of how severely it upends society as a whole and causes patriotic confusion and domestic chaos. most other nobles share his same opinion; for the most part, he doesn’t think very much outside the political propaganda fed to him.

3. Is your OC usually magnanimous in victory - whether against a defeated foe, or against a friend in a game or competition? Or perhaps they enjoy exulting in their success at the expense of others? Perhaps with ribald mockery or spiteful vengeance?

HAHAHA this is a great one. grace absolutely likes to gloat a little. …maybe more than a little. it’s not particularly good noble etiquette, but fuck that, right? it’s exhausting for her to pretend to be stoic all the time in order to cover up her political opposition, so she deserves to be smug over her little victories. and her big ones. glory and mockery on planet grace.

4. What has been the most difficult thing your OC has ever had to forgive (assuming they have ever done so)? Did they do this of their own accord? Or only after they felt justice had been done or penitence suitably demonstrated?

lennox: this is a surprisingly difficult question to answer. i think i have to go with brinne executing natal. probably the only significant wrong in his life that he’s forced himself to forgive. he’s also had to forgive himself for letting it happen, but he doesn’t fault himself as much as he faults others, so that comes second. lennox fought for days on end with brinne to lessen natal’s punishment for seeking out artemis’s rebellion (which natal never even found), to very little avail. he was able to convince her that it was not within the bounds of the law to execute natal before he turned 17, but really all that did was stall his execution date. he really fucking hated brinne for that one, not even only because of his gay little crush on natal, but it was also one of lennox’s first meaningful legal experiences as the head of his noble house, and he lost. that was real humiliation. he only forgave brinne because he didn’t have another choice if he wanted to stay sane and in power within the noble court. he’s forgiven her just enough to not let it affect him and his job.

rowen: rowen doesn’t do a whole lot of forgiving. unless she has very good reason, she won’t trust or absolve those who have slighted her unless they’ve shown real incentive to rectify the harm they’ve done. the best example i can think of is her forgiving grace for her noble birth, which sounds pretty basic because it’s not something grace had control over, but it is actually a big deal. rowen’s prejudice against the upper class runs deep, and she really enforced the divide between her and grace for a long time. if not for her own gay little crush on grace, it’s hard to say whether she ever would have been entirely over their class differences and forgive grace for her upbringing.

5. Does your OC harbour resentment towards a particular person, group or faction? Or are they perhaps part of a widely resented group themselves?

yes to both, to some extent. from both a political and a personal standpoint, adrian really loathes artemis’s rebellion more than he’s ever loathed anything else. resentment is a bit of a difficult word when applying it to his political feelings, because on that basis there’s a lot more fear than anger, so the full spirit of resentment isn’t quite captured. from a personal perspective, there’s a lot of anger going on, especially from someone like adrian. if rowen hadn’t, y’know, mutilated brinne right in front of him, maybe he would only be afraid. but he wants them fucking obliterated for that. not the best move on rowen’s part! to answer the second question, idris’s nobility is largely respected by its population, and political dissidents are a minority, so adrian isn’t exactly resented by a large percentage of citizens, but the people who hate him really hate him. this goes double because he’s idris’s high priest, not just any noble. most people have a lot of respect for him, but some people absolutely despise him.

[idrisofficial]

i don’t think you’ve posted enough about the fucked up love square between adrian brinne kori and zuri. also kori and zuri deserve to hold hands and blush

ohh this is true. i will now begin to explain it to my audience of probably one (1) who already knows everything about it.

heartbreaking: mentally ill star crossed noble lovers are betrothed to absolute cinnamon rolls who don’t understand why their fiancés don’t love them.

in all seriousness it is pretty messed up. brinne and adrian went through an abundance of childhood trauma together and latched onto each other like the codependent traumabonded almost-gays that they are. despite being the children of the most respected people in the entire country, all of the other nobles hated them during childhood, and honestly still do, so they’re all each other has ever had. after brinne started distancing herself from adrian following artemis’s massacre, she practically lost her mind from the sheer isolation without him. even when she warms up to adrian again, it takes time for her to be able to genuinely open up to him like she did as a teenager. they both just kind of vaguely angst and then fuck nasty about it in the castle’s chapel.

and then right in the middle of her healing kori enters. and it gets So Much Worse. brinne adopted naturally hostile responses to most people even before the trauma of the massacre, so you can imagine that her reactions to new people are not so welcoming. yes she was somewhat prepared to meet the person she’s been betrothed to since childhood, but she was not expecting him to be seventeen. she was not expecting him to be a golden retriever boy who everyone fawns over. she was not expecting him to fall head over heels in love with her two seconds after seeing her. he’s the perfect guy, and she’s pissed. she has no trouble making sure kori knows that the sight of him repulses her. kori isn’t entirely oblivious (brinne is blunt as hell), but he stays optimistic through all of this. he’s definitely upset that his fiancée doesn’t love him, but wants to do his best to make her at least like him, so he keeps shooting his shot. he does not have the mind for politics, and while most of the nobles love him, none of them care about him enough to really get to know him. he’s extremely lonely and misses home. he just kind of wanders around confused most of the time, making it look like he’s happy and well-adjusted. kori also knows nothing about brinne’s affair with adrian, even though the entire noble court knows. none of them have the heart to tell him.

zuri is adrian’s fiancée. she’s a little different. she’s reserved and sweet and disciplined, and has tried to foster a good relationship with adrian for years. they just…don’t click. they’re too similar in too many ways for their relationship to truly be comfortable. zuri was also extremely shy as a child, and adrian was usually busy, so the two never developed a relationship early on. she knows about brinne and adrian’s affair, and has been aware of it since only a little while after it started. brinne and adrian were by no means subtle, and the nobles’ whispers about it became much louder over time. everyone pities her deeply, but no one wants to actually say anything about it. zuri tries to ignore it. she seeks adrian out and does nice things for him and tries to make herself attractive to him in all different ways. girl has tried everything at this point. it’s not working, and adrian feels awful about it. unlike brinne, he has a real connection to his obligations, and he also just values zuri deeply as a person. he can see how hard she’s trying and he wants to like her so, so bad. his demisexuality gets in the way of a lot of it, too (not that he knows what that is). zuri has no comfort, no real friends, and no support. she is putting everything into a relationship she knows is doomed to fail. adrian and zuri are a tragic couple and if they were given time and a little more anger inside, they would probably end up something like the alpha couple from tmg’s tallahassee album.

see, brinne and adrian are deeply in love and ultimately have no romantic interest in their fiancés. and kori and zuri are both the sweetest people ever and are distraught that their fiancés don’t love them back. in addition to this, kori and zuri’s personalities would match completely and they would likely give way to a relationship that helps them grow as people. the age gap between them is also smaller (still not great but it’s a fantasy story what do you want from me) and their life ideals match so much better together. i should just pair them up and let them be happy together, right? right? that would solve all the problems? or at least a lot of them? right?

well. i refuse to let anyone be happy. hope this helps :)

[idrisofficial]

Death in Reverse- dealer's choice :)

Death in Reverse: When has your character tried to fight change?

delicious question. i’ll go with adrian.

adrian’s role as a politician, if you can even call him that, is really fascinating—his job is to maintain the halcyonist institution. this often means being consulted by other nobles to establish whether new policy is in line with religious, and by proxy, historical precedent. essentially, adrian’s entire existence makes him an enforcer of the status quo. what’s worse, adrian does not trust himself or his own judgment in the slightest. he’ll make whatever call he thinks is most in line with halcyonist doctrine and values, but he really hates to make the call at all. it usually feels better to nix the policy as a whole, which nobles hate him for. the smart ones have learned to stop asking him, or maybe never ask him in the first place.

so in the lamest way possible, adrian fights change all the time. to a certain extent it’s his job to fight change by virtue of religious absolutism, but to a certain extent it’s his self-doubt which really makes him an agent of the status quo. the only real exception to this is when brinne wants to sit down and consult with him. that ends with brinne getting whatever change she goddamn wants.

[idrisofficial]

26 and 40 for adrian PLEASE

26. How does your character behave around children?

he's so lost. adrian doesn't really have to be around children very often because the castle is only full of the Most Important People In Idris and few if any of those are children. but at celebrations where the children of important political figures are invited, he's an awkward mess if he has to engage with any of them. he's slightly excused by the fact that the job description for halcyon's high priest doesn't really include being sociable, but even kids can easily notice that he doesn't know how to be a person. embarrassing for him tbh

40. How does your character treat people in service jobs?

the social awkwardness is a given again so i won't go into too much detail with that. he's uncomfortable with his standing in the power hierarchy, so obviously dealing with servants makes for stilted interactions galore. aside from that, adrian is nice if not dismissive of the castle servants, who are basically the only people in service jobs he comes into contact with. he appreciates the major conveniences they provide him, but probably not as much as he should. he doesn't really notice them most of the time, which is a bias most of the nobles share. sometimes his eyes are opened when a particularly religious servant finds it in themselves to approach him and ask for his blessing. it kind of goes against cultural standards for them to do that but adrian doesn't think to give two shits about someone of lower status talking to him, especially if it's about something as ubiquitous as halcyonism.

[idrisofficial]

azure

1 for rowen, evander, brinne, grace

2 for brinne, lennox, grace

3 for evander, rowen, brinne

4 for adrian and brinne

5 for rowen, evander, grace

1. Does your OC have a guiding principle by which they live their life - such as duty, self-restraint or vengeance? Has this ever been tested by circumstance or challenged by another person?

rowen: i mean, justice. it’s been her life’s purpose since always to protect herself and others from oppression and fight for freedom. truth be told, she doesn’t really know what she would do without injustice to fight. the lines become a lot more blurred when you stop to wonder what exactly justice means in a given circumstance.

evander: i think evander’s guiding principle is best described as harmony. he doesn’t fight for the sake of fighting, and he'd really prefer not to in the first place. but he has an end goal-- a reason for what all of his work means, and it’s peace and success for a free society. that’s reflected not just in his political views and actions, but in his relationships with other people on a smaller and larger level.

brinne: security. this is obviously developed after her major shift of behavior and values following artemis’s massacre, where before that it was definitely self-expression. every action brinne takes as a person and as a political figure is to ensure her own safety no matter the cost. this typically involves ensuring the safety of the social order and the noble class, but she would sell any of them out in a heartbeat to protect herself. …save for adrian, who certainly would test her values in that situation.

grace: this is harder to answer (sorry for leaving you underdeveloped grace), but i think i’d have to go with progress? if that makes sense. a continued motion of improvement, both personal and societal. grace is someone who very much clings to her values and uses them to guide her actions. whatever she deems a step in the name of progress, she works towards.

2. Is your OC loyal to a particular nation, clan or social group? How far would they go in ensuring the safety and success of this faction?

brinne: brinne, for the most part, is loyal to herself. by extension, she usually acts loyally towards the noble and royal institution, but she harbors no concrete inner allegiance to the crown. as of late, she’s tried to form connections with royal customs and halcyonism, but it’s a weak bond at best. for her own sake, she would do just about anything to ensure the monarchy’s success and stability.

lennox: lennox is also loyal to the monarchy for selfish reasons, although he holds more of a connection to the institution through his family’s name. he’s fiercely loyal to his family, and understands that the success of the monarchy is also the success of the people he cares about (i.e. himself and his siblings). he would stop at nothing to maintain his own power, likely even at the cost of his siblings, although painfully.

grace: grace has made her immediate goal to ensure the safety and success of artemis’s rebellion, and is certainly willing to risk her own life and livelihood to see it prosper. a little boring to get three similar answers in a row, but so much of what forges the conflict in this wip is having central characters who are all willing to give their everything to see opposing ideals to their success. love me some characters with extreme ambitions.

3. How confident is your OC of the loyalty of their companions, lovers or followers? Do they ever feel tempted to test this through spying upon them? Or by engineering circumstances where their loyalty might be tested?

evander: the way evander sees it, he has no choice but to believe in the loyalty of his followers. idrisians against the crown are hard to come by, and it’s even harder to find people who are willing to fight against the tyranny. he stays wary of most people and only gives away what he has to, but he refuses to trap himself in endless wondering about betrayal and disloyalty.

rowen: rowen is more concerned about the extent of her followers’ loyalties than evander. “tests” is a bit of an extreme way to put it, but she definitely keeps tabs on who is willing to do what in the name of the revolution. any act of sedition is highly punishable in idris, so she makes it known what is expected of members and puts pressure on them to take risks and not shy away from illegal activity. rowen was a lot harder on grace than she typically is to new members, and grace definitely had to outright prove herself in multiple dangerous situations before rowen could even begin to trust her.

brinne: brinne is acutely aware of the reality of her noble court’s loyalties, which is that the nobles hate her, but need her. she’s been almost universally detested by them since she was a kid, and it’s only gotten worse as time has gone on. of course, they need a monarch, but brinne is in a constant state of fear that the nobles are planning some form of a coup. ironically, she’s too afraid of confirming the possibility that she doesn't set up any systems of ensuring allegiance. she’s always looking for anything suspicious, though.

4. Is your OC honest about their true loyalties? Or are they happy to feign belief in a cause or leader in hopes of material (or other) reward?

adrian: adrian tries to believe in the things he's supposed to. whatever he knows he should uphold, he tries to believe in. that's about it.

brinne: brinne is never fully honest about her true loyalties. like adrian, she now tries to believe in the things she knows will help her politically, but it's not really in her nature to conform. for the sake of her power and safety, she'll act as though there is no gap in her actual beliefs and what she's supposed to believe.

5. Does your OC believe that people should only believe or take inspiration from something if it is actually true? Or are there circumstances where a motivating lie is to be preferred to an awkward or uncomfortable truth?

rowen: rowen thinks lies are overall immoral, and usually dangerous when spread on a large scale or are about something important. however, she's not above using them if necessary or if it seems the potential benefits outweigh the potential cost. for the sake of organizing the masses, rowen definitely believes that a motivating lie is preferable to an uncomfortable truth.

evander: evander is on the same page as rowen, although his threshold for what constitutes "necessary" is much higher, and he has more moral qualms about it in general than rowen does.

grace: grace is all about the truth. after the swathes of lies and propaganda growing up, she wholeheartedly believes that people deserve to know political realities. she understands that this isn't always possible or in the most peoples' interest, but unless the truth will likely cause real harm, grace's principles are to be completely straightforward with people.

[idrisofficial]

well now i am curious abt this “sexuality rant” 👀👀

NOOO DONT ENABLE ME…😈😈😈

brinndrian are the queerest “straight” couple to exist in the history of ever i think. i put straight in quotes for a variety of reasons, most of all because adrian is actually demi, but also because of idris’s general concept of sexuality. i really wanted to create a universe with some societal gender fuckery going around, so i built idris as a society where bisexuality is the norm and gender is considered to a much lesser degree than one might expect. the expectation of bisexuality comes with a culture that is also much more accepting of people not wanting kids— generally, it’s standard practice that people who want children will pursue opposite sex relationships and people who don’t will pursue same sex relationships.

this is kind of a chain reaction for the degree of sexuality people expect within individual relationships as well. people tend to associate opposite sex couples with more sexuality than same sex couples, because of the “choice” evident in the pursuit. nobles don’t get a choice in their future spouses as they are all betrothed heterosexually, but this culture still carries over. …which is to preface that brinne and adrian likely would have gotten in far less trouble if they had been a same sex couple. still considerably more than even an average pair of forbidden noble lovers, because they are at the very top of nobility, but if they were gay it would have been more easily brushed off.

brinne and adrian’s relationship begins in a place of completely innocent childhood friendship, as a respite from both of them being shunned by all their other peers. there’s an intense devotion embedded early on in their relationship because of their deep loneliness and contrasting personalities; with each other, they feel whole.

their coming to terms with sexuality in their early teen years is an awkward thing. brinne has never met her fiancé (who happens to be five years younger than her anyways — a big difference when one of them isn’t even a teenager yet), and adrian knows for a fact that he isn’t attracted to his fiancée (zuri) either. adrian feels immense guilt for his discomfort around zuri, but there’s something constantly repulsed in him by her many romantic advances. adrian is even more cognizant of this once brinne begins to reveal her own romantic intentions, and he feels very differently about her. for adrian, his demisexuality really stems from a place of vulnerability; when he is able to unmask his layers of repression and also experience someone else placing their full trust in him with their own insecurities, attraction comes to him much easier and much faster. of course, being as anxious as he is, he has no courage to make any first moves with brinne, but when she makes her intentions clear, adrian is happy to reciprocate.

the analysis of brinndrian’s romantic/sexual escapades from brinne’s perspective is totally different. brinne is a person who feels a lot of emotions and feels them amplified tenfold. it barely even crosses her mind not to act on her attraction. yes, there’s a small element of her questioning whether it would ruin their relationship, but ultimately, she can’t not tell him how she feels. and as soon as adrian indicates that he feels the same way, brinne has no hesitations about taking things to the next level. in fact, she’s only spurred on by adrian’s apprehension about pursuing something romantic. sexuality, to brinne, becomes another means of rebellion: by pursuing adrian, she’s not only satisfying her romantic/sexual needs, but also spiting her parents and everyone else trying to force her into the conformity of typical noble relationships.

brinne doesn’t bother to hide anything from anyone, much to adrian’s chagrin. this is where their relationship gets a little more ambiguous. in most regards, their relationship is wholly consensual, but there are times when power dynamics and communication issues do impede the “wholesomeness,” so to speak, of their relationship. adrian is devoted to brinne not only as his sole source of companionship, but also as her servant. ultimately, she is the heir to the throne, and she will be his monarch. adrian certainly feels the weight of this even when they are teenagers, but is too nervous to breach the subject with brinne. brinne maybe thinks about this in passing a few times, but the power dynamic is hardly on her radar. to her, the future high priest of idris is virtually on the same level as the future monarch. while in terms of power she’s correct enough, in terms of social dynamics she couldn’t be more wrong. brinne also consistently disregards adrian’s concerns about their romantic relationship becoming obvious to other nobles. brinne invites and welcomes this judgment because she’s accepted that the noble court will never view her in a positive light, but adrian is still worried about the repercussions for both himself and brinne. whenever he brings this up, brinne ignores him. it’s shitty on her part, and adrian doesn’t have the strength to push it, even when he’s certain it’ll turn out for the worse.

after artemis’s massacre and brinne’s withdrawal from…everything, the landscape of their relationship is completely changed. brinne tries to sever everything between them because she can’t bear to be vulnerable anymore, and she knows that she won’t be able to keep from breaking down in adrian’s presence. adrian is crushed. after seven years of close friendship, three years of a romantic relationship, and the recent onslaught of trauma that’s left him newly disabled and with PTSD, brinne abandoning him is the one thing he just can’t take. especially when he sees her in pain and knows that he could help, and she still pushes him away. this is made significantly worse when brinne starts to use religion as a coping mechanism, as she goes to the chapel frequently and proceeds to act like nothing ever happened between her and adrian. adrian does actually manage to express his disheartenment about it, but brinne closes herself off emotionally so thoroughly that it barely reaches her.

in every iteration of the story’s plot, there has been an important aspect of brinndrian’s reunion. at this point i don’t really consider one draft or another to be the “actual” version of the story, so there isn’t really a concrete place about where they end up, but it’s pretty inevitable that they magnetize again. they can only function so long forcefully breaking their codependency. also they’re still horny for each other and that’s not going away. so. let’s be real it probably happens through a spontaneous chapel hookup

[idrisofficial]

6 for whoever u want :)

6. How much thought does your oc put into what they wear/look like? Any reason why?

i actually imagine that most of the big 6 ocs think a lot about it, although maybe that’s the result of projection. either way, for almost all of them, it’s not so much about personal style or attractiveness- all of them are extraordinarily cunning people whose images have the power to make or break their most important goals.

the only person this doesn’t apply to as much is adrian, who worries a lot about how he’s perceived, but doesn’t actually do anything about it. he has a vague sense of personal style in line with his available options and he just leads with that.

[idrisofficial]

4 :3

4. What appears in your OC's darkest nightmares?

not even going to lie rowen (or iterations of rowen that are supposed to represent her) are in brinne and adrian’s nightmares constantly. which makes sense considering she’s pretty much responsible for both of their PTSD.

grace has nightmares about natal that are sometimes terrifying and sometimes extremely pleasant, and only feel like nightmares in retrospect when she wakes up. she is way more traumatized from his death than she realizes

[idrisofficial]

🤝 Does your OC have someone they want at their side when they are scared? Who?

🤝 Does your OC have someone they want at their side when they are scared? Who?

waaaa this is such a good question…hits right in the feels because honestly it applies to everyone

- adrian and brinne want each other because they’re codependent dumbasses who have never had anyone else to support them

- rowen and evander are both pretty independent and definitely trust themselves to be able to hand a fight (both of their fear responses). but evander will always feel brotherly obligation to protect rowen and rowen doesn’t really trust anyone other than evander for physical and emotional comfort (although her relationship with grace explores this)

- grace wants natal. good luck with that one bae.

- lennox wants his siblings which will never not emotionally wound me. he used to want his parents for guidance too but that’s faded away in the past few years.

[idrisofficial]

what is the red wedding 👁️👁️

GFJBD okay so adrian and zuri are nobles and arranged fiancés. whole complicated thing going on there, zuri is madly in love with adrian, adrian is in forbidden love with brinne (the monarch) but wants to love zuri because they’re technically meant to be together.

the red wedding was an event in some iteration of the story (back when i was still hoping to write it novel-style) where artemis’s rebellion purposefully targeted the wedding to make a statement, chaos and violence and terrorism blah blah blah and zuri ends up dead in adrian’s arms. major political beat in the story, major romantic beat in the story for adrian’s conflict with brinne and zuri.

zuri is among the least deserving to die btw. she is an actual cinnamon roll and i refuse to let her have good things. sorry girl

[idrisofficial]

aghhh but i feel remiss not talking about adrian too. i don’t feel quite as intensely about him because he’s so lame, but i have a special love for him as my once and always center point for the story. he’s been the perspective character for four years. he deserves some recognition (and how fitting that i didn’t give it to him until further consideration!).

adrian is the high priest of idris, holy embodiment of dawn and dusk, transcendence of halcyon’s earthly domain. he’s also a huge fucking pissbaby who sits there and squeaks rather than make his own decision. adrian’s first role in the story was as a pawn to artemis, and i think it’s still fitting. despite his extreme power and influence, he lacks the confidence and political instincts to manage just about anything. this applies to both his priesthood and his general character. adrian is lonely because it is a fearful thing to subjugate himself to others’ judgment, and fear shuts him down entirely. his only meaningful relationship is with brinne, and being her counterpart, her hesitating partner in whatever crime, is the only thing that really matters to him. he doesn’t know how to be without her. she offers him clarity, freedom, life itself, and yet the closer they get the further they are repelled. at least, in their adolescence, they have each other; when brinne later refuses him and he knows it is out of a deeper fear than even he is familiar with, he cannot cope. no prayers can save him from this (he tries). adrian is looked up to by so many, and worth so little when the chips are down. the other nobles knew it before he did, and it has slowly chipped away at his life and reduced him to nothing. but he keeps going. and going. and going. he keeps going for Something—be it brinne, be it the forces of halcyon, be it his own cowardice and revulsion of change. his insecurity in his own skin and constant looking over his shoulder is so real. he’s just waiting to prove everyone right about him.

yeah, i think it’s safe to say i’m emotional about him.

Which characters/character do you feel most personally/emotionally involved with and why?

oh this is a very difficult question and i appreciate it very much. as any creator would, i’m inclined to say all of them in different ways…but that’s kind of a cop-out.

i think i’ll say brinne and lennox. they’re not the characters i relate to the most, but i do think i feel the most emotional connection towards them. a lot of what draws me to them is their silent suffering—both of them live in glass prisons of their own making. a lot of this is mental illness related, but their natural dispositions are also of great influence (although lennox’s natural disposition is extremely debatable when you consider nature vs nurture).

brinne was the first of any of my idris characters to exist, and the depth of her development definitely follows suit. her transition from a manic but deeply idealistic teenager to a reticent and self-interested monarch through the buildup of her childhood trauma and the final straw of her near death experience is so deliciously heartbreaking. her loneliness, her codependency with adrian, her sexual and alcoholic coping mechanisms, her deep uncertainty in the religion that gives meaning to her entire life…poor girl can’t catch a break. brinne has always been the focus of idris, and i’ve had fun and i’ve had pain hurting her like i do. most of the actual writing that i’ve accomplished revolves around her, and for good reason. she is at the core of the conflicts plaguing idris’s centuries-old culture and still just a twenty two year old girl who never really got to grow up. sometimes i act as though her teenage self and her adult self are two separate people, but the truth is that they are painfully intertwined. brinne’s suppression of her idealism and desire for change in service to her desperate attempts at self-preservation is what drives her motivations throughout every iteration of this story. she cannot escape who she is, try as she might. and i think there’s something so, so compelling about that for someone in a position of such horrible power like she is.

lennox is layer upon layer upon layer. the fact that he was originally inspired by byakuya togami? we’re not gonna talk about that. lennox has also come a long way as a character, the third to exist after brinne and adrian. he’s an og. lennox was a nice kid up until about age six, where the kindness was quite literally shattered in him to make room for solid perfection. a machine with style. he grew into the role almost too perfectly. the pinnacle of competence, a voice of absolute reason and logic amidst his generally wild and dysfunctional generation of nobles. here is why i feel such connection to lennox. he is ice on the outside, ice on the inside, speaks only when necessary but controls the conversation, and casually usurps the throne from time to time. he has studied these same people for sixteen years, understands most of them sickeningly well, and appears virtually flawless aside from his mansplainer bullshit. but my god is he grumpy, bitchy, flamboyant, perfectionistic to the point of petulance, and baselessly sadistic. he’s the second most powerful person in the country and he has constant migraines from dealing with others’ bullshit. he loves his siblings. he’s one of only two characters to understand his sexuality and he’s deeply afraid of it. he gets no bitches. he’s still mourning the death of the cousin whose death he was responsible for and who he was boyishly in love with. he’s sensible as all hell, but my god, he is fucking losing it. nobody gets that. even the people who hate him don’t get that. they hate him for his pretentious swag but don’t understand how much of a loser he actually is. anyways. i’m on a tangent now. he’s flawless. he’s horrible. there is no changing who he is, but would he ever have turned out like this naturally? lennox is a product of both what others have made him into and what he has forced himself to embody. there is no lennox that isn’t a diamond formed under absolute pressure.