#obligatory this also goes twice as much for black people with natural hair but I am speaking from my own 3B sheep curl experience

[runekept]

honestly even if I didn't like chappell roan's music (which I do) I love her for reminding people that you can do things to style 3's-range curly hair besides straightening it

[one-piece-dumpster-fire]

Hi can i have a hcs of being the older sister of vivi killer drake and katakuri who is nice and compasionate please-Sarah

I'm sorry this took... embarrassingly long to complete. And I'm not gonna lie, it was rather difficult for me to come up with good headcanons for this request. I'm really not proud of this one, but... hopefully you'll like it at least a bit, dear ^^'

Having a kind older sister headcanon

Nefeltari Vivi

Vivi absolutely adores and looks up to you!

secretly, she wants to grow up to be just as much of an amazing and kind person as you are

however she can also be a bit of a brat and a little rebel from time to time; especially in her younger years she would often switch between wanting to be with you and wanting to be left alone in a matter of seconds

sometimes, when she's in an especially mischievious mood, she even goes as far as to hide from you on the palace grounds all day long

seeing how your mother died when you and your little sister were still pretty young, your dad Cobra was initially the one who tried to take on both parental roles and raise you to the best of his abilities; but since he's also the King of Alabasta and has a lot of responsibilities to take care of, it didn't quite work out in the long run. Thus you jumped in for him, taking on both a sisterly as well as a motherly role for Vivi as she was growing up

still, Cobra is extremely protective of his two girls and therefore you're rarely allowed to leave his sight or the palace. But that ain't stopping you from occasionally sneaking out in secret, and once Vivi is old enough to accompany you, you bring her along. Those little 'trips' later on fueled her desire to sneak out on her own and make friends with the other children in Alabasta

every evening, when it's time for bed, she sits down with you and proudly tells you about the things she did that day while you brush through her hair

although she's eager to share most of her hobbies and adventures with you, the one thing that Vivi is extremely cautious about is letting you meet her friends. Grown people aren't allowed in their club, so when she finally decides to introduce you to Koza and the rest, you have to promise not to tell anyone

you're the one person Vivi can confide in 100% and she knows that her secrets are always safe with you- even from Papa Cobra

so it's only natural that you were also the first person she told about her plans to infiltrate Baroque Works

and while Vivi is away on her secret mission, you make sure to help your little sis from the inside by delivering informations about the current situation in Alabasta. All while keeping up the facade of the good older princess who believes that Sir Crocodile is a hero, of course

when she finally comes back home with Luffy and the Strawhats, you do everything in your power to assist them in their plan to get the country back from the Warlord. With an all-out civil war right around the corner Vivi especially needs you as emotional support and counts on your wisdom to help with her decisions. You're her big sister after all, and if there's anyone she needs to have by her side while she's facing all of the coming chaos, it's you.

Killer

you know those rebellious teenagers that are always like "Moooom, don't tell me what to do!!!!"? That's Killer, but in little brother form

he definitely doesn't like being coddled or looked after. Yes, he gets into fights and danger regularly, but it's normal. He doesn't need you to chew him out for it every time

despite that, he really really does love you though. Hence why he's occasionaly pushing you away- as pirate he's living a dangerous life, and he doesn't want his nice and sweet big sister to get caught up in it

his way of showing apprecation for you has always been a bit unusual, even back when he was young. One time, when you were still living together, Killer tried to surprise you by cooking your favorite food for your birthday; but he ended up setting your house on fire instead, forcing you to move again

when you were still children you would occasionally babysit your little brother as well as his best bud Kid, and things often got out of control when you three were together

especially the little redhead seemed to be in a rather provocative mood whenever you were around. Sometimes Kid would declare that you'll be his woman one day, which always ticked off Killer and caused him to start fights with his friend

even to this day, Killer still tries to keep you away from Kid. He adores his friend and captain, but also really doesn't want him to try and get flirty with you... again. That's just all kinds of wrong

it's not just Kid though, no one else in the crew is allowed to comment on your looks/attricteveness/whatever either, or they'll have to deal with a pretty mad Killer

nowadays he's a lot more relaxed when it comes to you and your presence around the crew though. From time to time he still berates or tells you that you are too friendly for your own good, but deep down he's appreciative of your caring nature and how you always treated him with kindness

one thing that never really changed is Killer's desire to cook by your side and show off all the things he learned within the past few years

you're the only person he feels the need to impress and who's criticism actually matters to him even if he accepts it with a scoff

X Drake

although he's the younger sibling, Drake is actually the protective one. Because of your kind nature he's always afraid that someone might try to use you

he's pretty clingy as a kid, and it honestly doesn't change much as he's getting older

you were the one that took care of him after your father died, so naturally he's always been looking at you for guidance and comfort from a young age on

as a result you're the only person that can claim to know Drake 100%. He can't keep secrets from you either, sometimes it's even as if you know him better than he does

although he knows he can always come to you with his problems and secrets, Drake is pretty hesitant to do so. Scared that you might get dragged into his dangerous affairs, he heavy-hearted decides that it's for the best to keep you in the dark about his life as double-agent

although he feels a bit guilty to keep you in the dark about his affiliations, it does have some perks as well. Thanks to his job he was able to secure you a nice house in a calm (and most importantly, protected) living area that's close to his marine base

you could say it's his way of 'repaying' you for taking care of him for so long. Drake loves you and can't help but feel as if he's in your debt

as long as his job allows it he makes sure to visits you at least once or twice a month to make sure that you're doing good

during those visits he often thinks back to what your life used to be like when you were kids, and the mood quickly turns sober as he remembers his abusive father. That's usually when it's time for you to step in and change the topic

just ask Drake about his crushes or if there is a woman he's got his eyes on and he'll turn all sorts of red again lol

huh, maybe there is someone he's interested in. But he can't tell you because you'd probably just offer to help him win her over, which is bound to end in disaster...

instead of talking about his preferences when it comes to women he'd rather tell you about the new limited edition Germa action figure he managed to get his hands on! And boom- just like that, your little bro is in a better mood again

can you imagine how excited Drake would be to tell you about his encounter with Stealth Black tho...? You'd probably have to calm him down during the call so he won't hyperventilate lmao

Charlotte Katakuri

much like Killer, Katakuri also doesn't like being coddled

back when you were young and still sailing around with the family, it was usually your and Perospero's unofficial job to look after the younger siblings while Big Mom was doing... y'know, pirate stuff

most of the kids were doing fine under your watch, but Katakuri always had a strong tendency to get in trouble. You would often scold him for starting fights with others and tell him that he shouldn't pay any mind to whatever insults they throw at him; unfortunately though he hardly ever listened

and after the incident with Brûlée, he completely isolated himself from everyone- including you. He also felt a tinge of guilt for not listening to your advice, since it might have kept his sister from getting hurt

it takes years, almost decades until Katakuri feels ready to open up again- and if it wasn't for how compassionate you were and that you never judged or pressured him, it might have taken even longer

eventually he tries to mend your relationship by inviting you to one of his meriendas, where you finally get the chance to talk about everything

from there on out you two slowly get reacquainted with one another and become friends again

and this time, he actually listens to your advice and takes it to heart

Katakuri still keeps up the appearance of the strong and cold older brother around the other siblings, but when he's with you he's more relaxed and sometimes even okay with talking about his pent-up frustration

whenever he returns from a mission he checks in with Mama first (that's obligatory) and then gets some donuts, pays you a visit to see how you've been holding up during the days he was gone, and explains what he's been up to

he's always looking out for you and whenever Mama suggests that it's time for you to marry some crazy psycho for the sake of an alliance, Katakuri would do everything in his powers to help you convince her that it was a bad idea

frankly Katakuri respects you more than his own mother and is very glad to have someone who doesn't put him on a pedestral or holds him to some insanely high standards. It makes him feel a bit more... human.

[wilwywaylan]

... As a very late ask, Pasiphaé, In and Ulrich~!

I’ve already done Pasiphaé and In, but since there’s a newelement in the relationship, I’m gonna start from scratch with thosetwo too !

Very long so under the cut !

How differently do they think of each other now compared towhen they first met?

Pasiphaé met In during a crisis, so the first thing she thoughtabout her was that she needed help, and she was ready to give herthis help, even if she looked kinda forceful with it. But In was lostand scared and cute, and reminded her a bit of a lost kitten, and shereally wanted to do something for her because she couldn’t bear tosee her so miserable.Now, they know each other better and that Inis comfortably settled in her new life. She’s not scared anymore, andPasiphaé could learn to know the real In at the same time In herselfdid. And she finds her immensly perfect. Not only is she pretty as apicture, but she’s nice, she’s smart, she’s very calm and patient,especially with her. In fact, Pasiphaé thinks In may be the bestthing in life, including sliced bread. She may be slightly in lovewith her, yes. She just stopped comparing her to a lost kitten,because you know. Maybe it’s not that smart.

At first, In was quite weirded out by this strange lady. Scratchthat, she was terrified. She was living the worst day of her life,andthere was that girl with wild hair who kept trying to talk to her andto help her, to the extent that In kinda believed that she washarassed by a witch (okay, maybe not, but she thought there wassomething really wrong with her and she was up to no good). Nowthat she knows her better, In realizes that Pasiphaé can’t be up tono good, except when she wants to help someone, and even that doesn’tmean anything evil or bad. She thinks that Pasiphaé is a wonderfulperson who dedicates an impressive amount of time to help otherpeople and try to make things better, even if she sometimes is a bitmisguided.

When Pasiphaé first met Ulrich, she kinda wondered who was thatman who was acting as unrefined as her, raiding the buffet during areception. But he was fun, witty and provided good distraction whilethey gobbled on toasts and sushis and things, so she found hiscompany quite enjoyable. Now she… still finds him witty and funand good company, but she knows that he’s also serious, hard-workingand has a lot of integrity, which is very important in his line ofwork. He’s a strong man, who can endure trials and provides support.And he’s still very fun to raid the buffet with and bitch abouteveryone around them~

In was a bit more wary about Ulrich at first. After all, she onlyknew about him what Pasiphaé had told her, and she knows hergirlfriend tends to assume the best of all people, includingmilitary. Nevermind that more than half the people in the army havebeen revealed as being corrupted to the bone, so she was more than abit wary about that new « friend » suddenly popping intotheir lives.It didn’t take too long for her to discover that no,Ulrich is not corrupted, he’s a good soldier who does his best tomake things better, in and out of the military. Besides, he’s niceand quite fun, outgoing and very interesting, and she quickly came totrust him. And by being around him, In realized that marechals couldbe nice and honest people, which helped her regain a bit ofconfidence in them. It helps that Ulrich himself protests againstcorruption in their ranks.

As she did with him, Ulrich found Pasiphaé quite fun to bearound. It wasn’t everyday that he met someone in those stuffyreceptions that did as he does, and lingered around the buffetinstead of dancing to stuff their face with all the delicious food.It was nice to have someone to stand around with and exchange tips onwhich little toasts were the tastiest. Now, on top of being funand witty (and without manners), he thinks she’s a very strong personwho can endure a lot (which is good seeing the chaos she sometimescauses). He still finds her funny and witty and loves bantering withher, with the added bonus of having someone he can trust fully andshow his true nature without fear. And some nice, homemade music justfor him.

As for In, Ulrich immediatly noticed that she wasn’t comfortablearound him, and he felt the judgement gaze fixed on him. But sheseemed to tolerate him around because Pasiphaé seemed to like him,she was still nice and polite, and he had to admit, it was quite niceto have her around because she’s pretty, calm and wise.Now thatshe trusts him and ditched the wary behavior, she’s like super niceand patient. As with Pasiphaé, he loves to have someone he trustsfully around, and who he can be 100% himself with. He just needs toremember to not lay the stupid jokes too heavily, because he knowsshe doesn’t have a lot of tolerance for those (except in a reallyjoking tone and/or in dire situations), but it’s not that hard to do.

What do their friends/family think of their relationship?

Bérengère was kinda sceptic at the start, as were almost all theZürns (except maybe Alizée), because your brother just jumped intoan existing relationship with two intriguing and very… unique…ladies. But then, they realized that they were doing all they couldto make it work and that there was actual effort from all three, thatthey were showing true love and companionship and support. Bérengèrenow things that they fit together well, and Ulrich chose wisely. Shelikes both ladies, and goes along well with In. Amadeus askedUlrich if he was trying to one-up Bérengère or something. Maybebecause he got a step-Waylan AND a person with long black hair. Orjust because he has two of them. But yes. One-upping so hard.Alizéejust finds the three of them adorable in their interactions. She, Inand Pasiphaé sometimes have a drink together and share horrorstories from their respective hospitals.Ludwig was the one to dothe « I have a feud going with my sibling and of course I don’tlike him ! » sibling thing and ask the obligatory questionof « are you sure ? Because he’s really, reallyannoying ». But in fact, he’s quite happy for his brother –he just doesn’t want anyone to know it. He gets along with In quitewell, because she’s calm.

Arrakis’ reaction was something along the lines of « are youfucking kidding me ? » because that man was already hisbrother-in-law AND his superior, and now he’s TWICE hisbrother-in-law ? And could his superior brother-in-law reallyget along with his sister and her opposite girlfriend ? Wellyes, they could and they are very happy. He still can’t totallybelieve it, but as long as everyone is happy, well… It makes forinteresting family reunions, at least.

The other brothers are all happy. After all,if Pasiphaé wantsmore than just one person to cuddle with ? She’s free. They arekinda protective of her and In at first, but Ulrich isArrakis-and-Bérengère approved, so there’s no real risk to harmtheir sister or their sister-in-law (they are kinda protective ot Intoo, because who’s going to be, if not them?). Since everything isgoing smoothly, they accept Ulrich in their circle and make lots ofjokes at his expense. Antarès already wrote two short stories aboutthem, including one in a fantasy setting.

As for Pasiphaé’s little chicken, One was… kinda apathetic. Manokay, seems nice, doesn’t yell or hit : good. Can nap on him.Fun. Llyr was a bit wary of him. Not to say he’s scared of him,no… but a man he doesn’t know entering his surrogate mommy’s lifelike this took a little time for him to accept it, and not tiptoearound him anymore. Now that he knows that he’s a good man whodoesn’t hurt little doves, he’s more comfortable around him, and eventries to talk with him sometimes. Menthe knew Ulrich from hiswork before he entered the relationship, and if she didn’t trust himthat much at first, she came to see him as, if not totally trustful,at least not an immediate danger for her. So when he started goingout with Pasiphaé and In, she was okay with it as long as they bothwere too. Now she’s at ease around him, and she can joke with him andtrust him with her run-ins with the laws when the need arises.

How do their personalities/skills complement or contrast with each other?

They are quite well-balanced. WherePasiphaé is always active and juggling several projects or tasks atonce, In and Ulrich are more relaxed and take time to do each thingseparatly. Both of them have great patience, whichis very good whenone is always followed by a vampire, a dove, a cat, a seethinghospital director, drama, a swordmaster looking for a fight andseveral other weird persons and chaos-makers. Most of the time, she’sthe driving force between their activities together, but she alwaystakes care to plan things they would like, and to take their tastesand levels of energy and sociability in account.

The problem, when you’re always runninghere and there, trying to do everything at the same time, is thatyou’re not always perfectly organized. Pasiphaé is far fromorganized, and she often keeps looking at things she had in her handsfive minutes before, or what was she doing again ? Luckily,Ulrich is organized, you have to in his line of work, and In evenmore. Joining their forces, they manage to contain that whirlwind ofmess that is their girlfriend.

As a group, they aren’t that sociable.They clearly prefer staying home when they have some free time andlounging around in sweatpants and Ulrich’s shirts than going out andrunning around, they do that at work already. Sometimes, they go out,for a walk, for lunch, or to a museum, those kinds of activities, butthey never plan anything big. When they do have to go to an importantreception, they drag their feet and stay close to the food, or go andtry to dance together, which either leads to a steamy relay-tangonumber, or an utmost catastrophe. For those occasions, In puts herknowledge of clothes, make up and hairdressing to good use, so herpartners don’t look like crazy rednecks (especially Pasiphaé, sinceUlrich can wear his uniform).

Even in their day-to-day life, they arewell-balanced : Ulrich is a good cook and take care of feedingthem so they don’t have to rely on take-out everyday, the dishes (buthe enrolls them to help) and their stashes of food (he freezes a lotof food so they always have ready-meals at hand), In is now an expertat laundry, and Pasiphaé takes care of the cleaning. The one who’sfree the most gets to do the grocery shopping, which means it’s neverdone on time. They were very happy to find a mall that deliversdirectly to their home.

And to be honest, it’s very cool tohave two doctor girlfriends when you’re a military man. It meanschances of being treated in priority, private treatments at home andyour own two lovely little healers~

What is their favorite aspect of each other?

In loves the energy anddedication Pasiphaé puts in each and every thing she decides to puther head into. It’s amazing to see someone ready to move mountainslike this, even if it can sometimes be… kinda tiring, to be insurrounded by that much chaos. And not to be shallow or anything, butshe thinks she’s very aesthetic when she’s working on something, allconcentrated, with her hair falling in curls all over her face andher tiny nose scrunched in concentration and freckles and too-bigshirts and aaaaah.And she likes Ulrich’s…firmness. Not that he’s strict or anything, especially outside hiswork (insideis another story entierly). He can be serious, solid,reliable. Not to say that Pasiphaé is flaky, but it’s good to havesomeone to rely on someone, someone who can take matters in his handsand get serious things done. Ulrich can deal with anything lifethrows at him, or that’s the impression he gives. Even panic attacks,he’s very good at that, and that’s a really, really helpful andcomforting skill.

Pasiphaé loves all thequalities that make Ulrich a good man. Not only is he nice andpatient with her and In, being a nice, trustful companion, he ishonest, has lots of integrity, especially in his line of work, andit’s nice to know that there are still good men in the military. Andhe doesn’t have any qualm about acting like a peon at receptions withher, it’s quite refreashing for a noble person.What she likes about In,besides the fact that she’s absolutly gorgeous and looks perfect atall times, even when she just woke up, is that In is a very gentleperson. She may look cool and aloof, but that’s just the facade sheputs up for her work. Underneath, she’s a very nice and patientwoman, and she can endure a lot before losing her temper. That, andthe fact that she’s a bit dorky too. It’s the perfect mix.

Ulrich, like In, findsPasiphaé’s dedication admirable, and he finds it wonderful thatshe’s so generous, always dedicating countless hours to her causesand always ready to help people with their problems even if there’snothing to gain for her. Of course, it makes for an… interestinglife full of weirdos crashing on their couch and strange events thatsometimes mess with their routine, but Ulrich and In are patientenough for that.But if he likes Pasiphaé’sendless energy and motivation, he likes In’s calmness a lot. She’s asdetermined as their girlfriend, but she’s way quieter in her actions.It’s relaxing. He likes too that she’s very honest. If she doesn’tlike something or thinks your outfit is hideous, she won’t have anyproblem telling you. And her fashion advice is on point.

Do either of them have pet peeves about each other?

The thing that aggravateUlrich the most is when Pasiphaé lets herself be caught in herwhirlwind of activities and forgets that they had plans, or makesother plans at the last minute. At least, she has the decency of nottrying to find excuses, and honestly tells him that she didn’tremember or that she let herself be carried away, but it still grateson his nerves.With In, his pet peeve isless important. She’s patient, remembers appointments and dates, andplans accordingly. But she ALWAYS forgets to take her hair off theshower or bathtub drain, and it clogs the evacuation. And it’s hardto pretend it’s not her when she’s the only one to have long, longblack hair. She always apologizes and promises she’ll remember nexttime… and promptly forgets again.

Pasiphaé loves Ulrich andIn with all her heart, they are her precious anchors, partners,friends and fellow idiots, but sometimes, she can’t help but findthem a bit… too serious. Not that it’s necessarily a bad thing,because they need someone serious in their relationship, but shesometimes can’t help but lament their lack of… fantasy. Andimpulse. They need things like plans, budgets, they need to look atschedules and programs and hours and such, and never decide to dosomething at the drop of a hat. And sometimes, she wishes that theywould lose all their control for a while and do something really wildfor a change.

As proud as she is of hergirlfriend, In sometimes wishes that she would just… calm down.Stop running around, meddling and trying to save the world, andjust… sit down, take a cup of tea, and stop doing things all thetime. Sometimes, it feels good to unwind, and Pasiphaé really needsit because she’s under a lot of stress, even if she denies it all daylong.As for Ulrich… besidessometimes acting like an idiot with Pasiphaé and leaving her withthe hard task of dealing with two idiots instead of one, she doesn’treally have a pet peeve. She just doesn’t know if it’s due to hisattitude or her boundless patience.

How would eachreconcile with each other after a fight?

By talking. It's still the best way. Ulrich likes toverbalize his feelings and get everything out instead of letting itbrew inside until it reaches uncomfortable levels. It's important forIn to say things out loud too, and fight the initial impulse to keepeverything inside and bottle her feelings in the hope of themdisappearing without her having to think about it. As for Pasiphaé,it's equally important to take the time to stop and sit down to talkabout the problems.

What would be their ideal vacation getaway together?

Vacation ? What is that vacation thing you talk about ?No seriously, they get vacations at the same time once in a blue moon(okay maybe not, but when you have busy schedules, it's hard to findmore than a few days to get away for a moment). So when they manageto get enough time to tae a real vacation, they take care of choosinga place where they are sure they really will get all the calm theyneed. They would probably find a resort far from populated areas, ina tiny village, in the moutains or near a beach, but not a popularone, rent a small cabin or a hotel room, a cozy little place, stockit with all their favourite foods and everything they need, abandonall cellphones and internet connexions (except, you know, foremergencies or find good restaurants around), and disappear for twoweeks. There, they would go on walks, hiking, playing cards or music,visit the tiny villages lost around their place, or just relax andlounge around together.

Think of a new way (AU, different situation, etc.) they couldhave met for the first time.

Spiritverse ? Spiritverse!

It's the story of a ladydoctor-princess-musician who's very tired of doctoring, princessingand playing music all day long. She loves helping people, and since afew months, a new bunch of people, that she has never seen, hadappeared on her doorstep, seeking her. Those strange persons alwaysappear at night, and look at her like she could be dangerous to them,but they let her help them all the same. She couldn't be happier tohave found evidence of their existence, and that they seem totolerate her. Let's get real, they could off her in a second. Andstill, they come to her.

But it's tiring. It'sexhausting. Helping people during the day, and starting again atnight, and trying to find little shards of time here and there forher, and all she has to do... She can't keep on like that and expectnot to fall to pieces. But what can she say ? How can she turn themaway ? She can't and that's the problem.

Sometimes, she goes onwalks, to relax a little. With the added bonus that, if she's nothome for a moment, they can't find her, and she can breathe and actas if she didn't have a mountain of her own problems topped by theproblems of others. Of course, she thinks, it's her fault. She couldsay no, really, she could throw them out, or just tell them that shecan't, but she doesn't have the heart. And the problems pile up.

It's during one of thosewalks, along the river, that she suddenly spots something. Or rather,someone. Under the moonlight, she can see long, black hair fallinglike ink on pale skin, a long tail covered in tiny spots of light,splashing in the water below, and dark, dark eyes, as deep and darkas the abyss below her, looking at her. It takes her a second toregister that it's a mermaid looking at her, one of those mermaidsthat tales and myths say that they are very dangerous and will eatyour heart in a blink.

But that mermaid doesn'tlook dangerous. She just stares at her, doesn't move. And sincePasiphaé is Pasiphaé and cruelly lacks any sense ofself-preservation, she sits down at a raisonnable distance, andstares back. They stay like that a full minute at least. Then,finally, the mermaid starts to laugh. She has a nice laugh, Pasiphaéthinks, and she doesn't look athat threatening, so they starttalking. The mermaid is called In, just In, and she likes to stop atthe surface to enjoy the moonlight. They talk until late in thenight, until Pasiphaé just can't stay awake anymore. Before sheleaves, they promise to meet each other again.

When she comes back nearthe river, In is talking to a man, a strange man with long blond hairand a weird voice that gives her goosebumps. She's half-tempted to bejealous and ask if she has to wait for her turn, but In spots her andsmiles, and all ideas of leaving or protesting immediately disappearfrom her mind.

The man introduces himself: his name is Ulrich, and he's a banshee. Pasiphaé almost remarksthat she didn't know there are male banshees, because that wouldn'tbe very polite, and instead asks if he's there to tell her she'sgoing to die. Which earns her a confused look, because no, bansheessometimes like to take some time off and meet with other creaturesfor a chat. So why not a mermaid ? Despite the awkward start, soonthey are completely engrossed in their conversation. Ulrich, if hisvoice is weird, is a very nice guy. When the moon finally disappearsand it's time to go each their own way, they decide to meet againlike that again, at least once per week.

And they do, week afterweek. Pasiphaé brings all kinds of things from the human world toshow In, and her guitar to play them music, Ulrich tells them all thegossip he hears among the psychopompes and everything, and they bothhelp Pasiphaé relax and not try to save the entire world. And asweird as it sounds, their relationship works quite well.

[magma-paint]

Obligatory reflection, correcting the record, whatever you want to call this.

This morning at time of posting I made an announcement that anon asks are now available again on my page so long as people are civil about it, and that got me thinking of why I disabled anon asks in the first place. As a result, I’m going to revisit such string of events not just to correct the record of what happened, but so I never have to address or discuss it ever again because I don’t want anything to do with what happened and move on. And in hindsight, it was probably the stupidest sh1t to get worked up over anyway.

During the summer or just entering the season I was browsing my dash like I usually do when I want to kill time and I came across a post one of my friends shared of a video for what you could call a “hair hack” or “grad hack”--pretty much some kind of life hack--for you gals with hair of a natural texture that makes wearing a grad cap difficult if you wish to leave your hair like that for your graduation instead of straightening it or styling it differently to accommodate it. When this all blew up it was assumed that the video itself is what I took issue with and as a result I got at least 30 hate-mail messages in my ask box basically calling me racist, stupid, a [female genitalia], telling me to get off Tumblr, that whole “show me on the doll where the video touched/triggered you” shtick, and on and on it goes, even as far as putting me on a few people’s block lists or “watch out for” lists, basically assuming I responded to the post the way I did because I “hate black people”. Very untrue. What I really responded to was a response to the video that read along the lines of “They only make grad caps for people with straight hair, I swear...”

This was the part of the post I took issue with, not the video itself, because the statement of “grad caps are only made for straight hair” is just so completely stupid and let’s just say the way in which I responded to such a statement was rash, heated, and more or less pulling a first-time-on-the-internet me. Agitated, loud, trying to sound smart, but in reality just looking like a raving lunatic to onlookers. I don’t remember exactly what I said, but “complaining about grad caps is a problem of your own making” was somewhere in there. So, to correct the record, here is what I was trying to say when I was going on an uncalled-for tirade about the statement made in response to the video:

Graduation caps are manufactured on mannequins that are standardized to match the average measurements of an adult head (I know there are high school grad caps and college/university grad caps, but by the time you reach graduation you’re pretty much an adult, so we’re just going to go off of that). These mannequins are pretty much the equivalent of a blank head model you would put a wig on for display or to put it up so that you can get easy access to it without fumbling with the net it comes in if you’re in a rush, no hair whatsoever.

Graduation caps are only worn once for one event and after that last graduation (depending on the degree you wish to obtain or were ultimately aiming for), you’re never going to wear one again, so to complain that a headpiece you only wear once (or however many times you have to with your respective degree, I’m not going to claim I know everything about graduation ceremonies or degrees) doesn’t fit is absolutely ridiculous. I didn’t say anything about not making modifications to it to make it work for the occasion. You absolutely can make modifications to your cap as you see fit and that are also allowed by the school.

Graduation caps are manufactured with the assumption that the wearer either fixes their hair in a manner that allows the cap to be worn as it should without a problem (gelled, straight) or their hair is short enough that certain textures, such as curly, thick, wiry, spiky, won’t make it hard to put it on and wear for however long the ceremony lasts and/or if they continue to wear it at the grad party. Again, I never said anything about not being able to modify your cap as you see fit and within school rules to accommodate it. Absolutely modify it as needed if you want to leave your hair in its natural style.

What I was trying to get at in response to the response to the video was that graduation caps are not made exclusively for people with straight hair, hair of certain textures, or no hair due to either cancer treatment or another medical condition (such as that in which the immune system attacks the hair follicles on the head, for instance) and to think that this is the case specifically to spite those with hair of a certain texture is ludicrous. If the person responding to the video or whoever thought that graduation caps were made the way they were specifically to spite them, then that’s a problem of their own making. Not the fact that they have hair of a certain texture, which is what was taken out of context/misinterpreted, but the fact they think these headpieces you only wear once or twice in your entire life are somehow discriminatory because those with straight hair are able to wear it without having to modify or hack for it accordingly.

Let me repeat myself: I was not insinuating anyone having a natural hair texture was a problem of their own making, but the notion that graduation caps being made a certain way specifically to spite someone with said hair texture was a problem of their own making. This is what got misinterpreted and the aforementioned blacklisting on certain blogs and hate-mail in my ask box from anons is the result.

There, now this is the response I should’ve made in the first place, though ideally the only response I should’ve made was no response at all. I should have just calmed down and walked away from my screen or responded more civilly instead of the raging fit I went off on if I had to respond at all. For anyone who got wind of this drama, hopefully this cleared up any confusion. Anyone out there who still hates me as a result, well, think what you want of me, that’s your bridge to build and cross. I’m not going to claim I don’t fuck up, I absolutely do. In this case I fucked up massively and I would expect people to call me out on it. However, if calling me out means sending hate-mail by anon asks and acting just as irrationally as I responded to the response in the first place, going as far as to brand me as a racist and blacklist me for this accusation based on nothing more than a statement that was misinterpreted, then you have no right to claim the moral high ground either. But I’m ready to be done with this nonsense, especially because what started it was just so utterly stupid. I’m not going to be responding to anything else on the matter and if anyone brings my attention to a mention of me and this drama still circulating, I’m just going to dismiss it. And to further stick this point that I’m through with political, social, or any other kind of drama of that nature, I will no longer be posting anything slightly in that realm, even if it’s on topics I’m strongly for. For now, anon asks are back open again, but the second someone decides to be an ass about it, I’m shutting it off.