#now the thing is that people who are willing to make themselves publicly visibe are generally also people who are performers in some sense o
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anyone else feel kinda alienated by the importance placed on being performative?
#ok so thoughts#now the thing is that people who are willing to make themselves publicly visibe are generally also people who are performers in some sense o#of the term#so like my perception on this is skewed#bc of course someone whos an actor is gonna have a way different stance on performance than me who isnt#and i get that but also like im having a hard time sometimes#like ive read some memoirs of queer people and theres this thing that keeps coming up#about how an important part of being queer is performance#which on the one hand yes i understand the world we live in makes performance a necessity for queer people#and also performance is an important thing to a lot of people#but im just sitting here feeling alone in the fact that being performative isnt something i want to do or really am able to do#like sure ill dodge questions i dont want to answer but like i hate lying i hate trying to be something im not#my joke is that my gender is less of a presentation and more of a lie by omission#and like that quote/joke that seems to come up a lot#thats like 'isnt life just a performace' or similar#and im sitting here like...... no? i dont think so at least#i dont know where im going with this#i guess im just sad that im probably never going to see that facet of myself reflected anywhere in media or otherwise#anyway anyone whos vastly uncomfortable with the idea of the self as a performance hit me up
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