#now that I've learned how to fix this????? just wait for it there's 1 dress that has been broken since idk 2020 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

toomanyfandomsorkinafs · 11 months ago

Text

IT’S TIME AGAIN

*child playing dress up with ** *

“Now she/he’s happy!”

“She/he looks dead inside-“

*(child)big smile*

“You know what I’ve realized?”

“Some thoughts are better left unsaid?”

“Nice try, anyways-“

“I could fix him, but whatever the hell is going on with him is way funnier.”

“I left instructions for everyone while I'm gone.”

“Mine just says ‘*** no.’”

“I want you to apply it to every possible situation.”

“Oh my god! We won!”

“Yeah I know.”

“Wait for me you before you go attacking! I can’t heal you if your already dead!”

“I’m sorryyyyyyy”

“Why are you burning our marriage certificate!?”

“Good luck trying to return me without a receipt.”

“I've never had a student score zero in everything.”

“What do you mean?! I chose the perfect spell for every situation!”

“Well, you answered "fireballs" for every situation.”

“What do you mean, person within fireball distance?”

“So you’re dating ***?”

“What? No! I’m just buying him an accessory since he has terrible fashion sense!”

“That’s literally a wedding ring.”

“Remember what I told you?”

“Don't be a cunt.”

“Darkness!”

“Oh my god. *, could you come in here for a second? **'s acting up again.”

“Hey ya, **, you acting up again?”

“You!”

“Yeah, it's me.”

** looks over to *** then back to *

“You are not the man of the house.”

“... Okay, yeah, that tracks. Alright, sorry honey, nothing I can do.”

“You are useless.”

“Bad news, **** locked themself outside of their own house.”

“Good news, we didn’t have to wait around for a locksmith.”

“Bad news, *** finds it very concerning that I know how to pick locks, and tried to unlock my Tragic Backstory(TM). I was too embarrassed to admit that the reason I learned it was because, at thirteen, I figured that was the kind of skill that would impress cute guys/girls/enbies.”

“Good news, a cute guy/girl/enby saw me do it.”

“Bad news, it was **, and since they’ve already seen me fall out of several trees, cry because I saw a fawn that was just too damn small, and knows I can ride a unicycle, they’ll never think I’m cool no matter what I do. It’s too late. They know.”

“Think you can answer some questions without the usual level of sarcasm?”

“If you can ask the questions without the usual level of stupid.”

“Hi, I’m ** and I like burning things! You look flammable.”

“Some people eat snails.”

“They must not like fast food.”

“*** won’t wake up, what do I do?”

“Did you try kicking him?”

“Yes.”

“I’m out of ideas.”

“I wonder if she/he likes me..”

“He/she doesn’t.”

“What if she/he doesn’t?”

“He/she doesn’t.”

“We've known each other for a long time, right? You've come to respect me?”

“Sure.”

“Well, get ready to stop.”

“You know, it wouldn't kill you to be nice to ** once in a while.”

“We don't know that.”

“I made lightly fried fish fillets for dinner.”

“**, It’s 1:15 am, what the fuck.”

“Do you want the lightly fried fish fillets or not.”

“Well, I mean yeah.”

“So come downstairs while they’re still hot.”

“Wait, you just made them?”

“Yeah, I wasn’t tired so I decided to make lightly fried fish fillets.”

“Say lightly fried fish fillets one more time **.”

“Who are we fooling, we’re all going to hell anyway.”

“*bad joke*”

“And the crowd went home.”

*playing bad music*

“This is fire!”

“Put it out!”

*playing bad music.*

“Yoooo! Turn it down!”

“Do you or do you not have me saved as ‘**'s puppyboy’ in your phone?”

“…”

“You know, your cloak looks amazing today.”

“Answer the question, ***.”

“I wish there was a better way to deal with **.”

“There is, but we’re all too pretty for jail.”

“Murder is okay! Sometimes!”

“So long as you kill the persons arresting you.”

“Dracula had it right, sleep all day, live alone in a castle, and explode into bats to get out of all social situations.”

“My heart is just dead right now.”

“Your heart is always dead.”

“I was walking around hoping no one would notice and no one did.”

“The moral of the story is… lie.”

“What’s 2 + 2?”

“4!”

“8!”

“21!”

“It’s 8! It’s 8!”

“Okay then what’s 10 + 10?”

“46!”

“It’s no longer gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss. It’s gaslight, gatekeep, guilttrip.”

“Last I heard, you were still on the run.”

“Last I heard, you were still a bitch.”

***, taping a knife onto a Roomba* “Be free, my child.”

** entering the room with a small cut on his ankle* “Who the f-“

*(People) is gathered in the living room for a meeting*

* *** walks in and sits on **’s lap*

“…”

“Why are you sitting there?”

“There’s no free seats!”

“But we made sure there was enough room for-“

*hugs ** tightly* “There are no free seats.”

*just found out someone they hate has a crush on them.*

“This is scary..”

“What? That a boy/girl likes you or that it’s ***?”

“Both.”

“I did a bad thing..” - ***

*next day*

“What did you do?” - *

“One minute I’m trying to remember” - ***

“I do a lot of ‘bad things’ daily” - ***

"Don't you know who I am? I'm broke, bitch. Recognize"

“The ritual. To preform it requires a sacrifice.”

“Sacrifice? I nominate ***.”

“Wait, what?”

“Because you're little, you'll fit on a barbecue.”

“I'm 5'9, it's like average height in most of the world!”

“Its not that kind of of sacrifice!”

“Worst she/he say is no.”

*ask for number/flirts*

“Your like a brother/sister to me.”

“We just met-“

“I never question my wife/husband’s choices because I am one of them.”

“My full name is *** * **** ****** *** (last name).”

“Did ur parents have a stroke while naming u or something?”

“Knowing them, prolly.”

“We’re playing Scrabble. It’s a nightmare.”

“Scrabble? Scrabble’s great.”

“Not when you’re playing with **, it’s not. They put words like ‘ephemeral’ and I put ‘dog.’”

“I think we can be evil as a treat.”

“We?”

“We.”

*** I’m the other room* “Oui is French!”

“You've got to act tough, ***! Show 'em you can't be pushed around! Show 'em they can't mess with you!”

“Right. Yes. Tough. Got it.”

*** standing up on his stool and slamming his hands down on the bar* “I'LL TAKE A CHOCOLATE MILK.”

*after the Squad has been separated for a few years*

“what have you been up to recently? “

“Leading a revolution with *****.”

“Good for you two! Me, I've joined the mob.”

*nods* “Oh, how cool! That's awesome!”

“I know! Anyway, have you heard from the others? ***?”

“Happily living as a hermit in the woods. **?”

“Wrongfully locked up in an asylum, which reminds me, we need to break him out later. *?”

“Cult leader.”

“Yeah, that sounds about right.”

“He/she took one look at my face and burst out laughing. Who does that?!”

“Best friends actually-“

“Oh no! My daughter/son is weird…”

“Your only now learning that?”

“Do you know the best way to respond to disagreement?”

“With tears?”

“No.”

*tears up*

“i'm going to make one of those diagrams that uses circles.”

“venn”

“probably tomorrow”

*breaks down the door to ** and ***’s room*

“GAYS/LESBIANS! WE'RE UNDER ATTACK!”

“While in a stressful meltdown, his/her boyfriend/girlfriend provides comfort with a bowl of ice cream and words of kindness.”

“Sweetie, you will fail if you keep sitting here.”

“Well you see, the explanation is perfectly simple and scientific. It was because shut up. Shut up is why.”

“This food is too hot... I can't eat it.”

“You’re very hot, and I still eat you.”

*silence*

“YOU GUYS ARE DISGUSTING!”

“One dinner... I just want ONE DINNER!”

*shows drawing*

“It’s screaming in fear!”

“It’s screaming in fear of someone wanting to keep it alive.”

“I’d be screaming if someone did that to me too.”

“Okay, help me, please!”

“Got two words for you.”

“I bet they won't be helpful.”

“Your problem.”

“I was right.”

“What do you want to be for Halloween?”

“Respected.”

“Appreciated.”

“At peace.”

“...I was gonna be a cat.”

“You deserve a reward for putting up with me.”

“You are my reward.”

“You deserve a reward for putting up with me.”

“True, you can be really difficult at times.”

*rolls over in bed and knees *** in the side*

“Ow! you kneed me!”

*sleepily* “Yeah, I do need you….”

“Honestly, I am so evil. So full of darkness. I feed of the souls of the living I strike fear into-“

“You sleep with a teddybear.”

“He’s my sECOND IN COMMAND IN MY ARMY OF DARKNESS!”

“Well, remember when ** made a romantic dinner for me?”

“***, they microwaved you a pizza.”

“Hey, I took your soul last month and-“

“No returns.”

*sobbing* “But it's making me sad...”

“Someone care to explain why we have 6 dogs in our apartment?”

“They're golden retrievers, dude. They retrieve gold. I did this for us.”

“Who are you to demand anything!? I run this town! You're just a bunch of low-income nobodies!”

“Uh, election in November. Election in November.”

“What, again?! This stupid country!”

“Yesterday, I overheard ** saying ‘Are you sure this is a good idea?’ and **** replying ‘Trust me,’ and I have never moved from one room to another so quickly in my life.”

“I'm never having a debate with *** again, he/she literally started his/her argument with ‘Riddle me this.’”

“Hey, are you free on Friday? Like, around 8PM?”

“Yes?”

“What about you?”

“Yes, I am.”

“Great! Because I’m not. You two go on without me. Enjoy your date.”

“Did he just-“

“I have a plan.”

“Good! As long as we aren’t breaking the law again, I’m open to hearing it.”

“…”

“I no longer have a plan.”

“The real question is: was all this legal? Absolutely fucking not!”

“I’m really sorry about that.”

“It’s okay! I like You cause your weird and spontaneous, I never know what to expect from you!”

“I gave her/him a knife.”

“So you put all our lives at stack?! For what!”

“He/she gave me a kiss :(“

“I gave her/him a knife.”

“So you put all our lives at stack?! For what!”

“He/she gave me (expensive gift) :(“

“So your technical a billionaire now, congrats! And can I borrow 20 bucks?”

“No I’m gay! I cant!

“No your not, I’m gay. Your five.”

“What do you want to be when you grow up?”

“I’d probably be a criminal or something.”

“There’s better ways to make money then stealing it.”

“I said nothing about theft! I just wanna go to jail. And don’t worry it’s gunna be small and simple and harmless.. like arson!”

“I have an idea.”

“A good idea?”

“Let's not get ahead of ourselves.”

“I truly go into housewife mode when I'm someone's soulmate- like, I'll make you pancakes and bacon every morning.” - ***

“This is a lie.” - *

“I'm literally dating them. This is a lie.” - *

“THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO COOK A PANCAKE, WHAT IS THIS.” - *

“Did you know? There is no escape.”

“Yeah I did know that.”

“*** started drink to forget her/his past.”

“It’s highly effective because now he/she can’t remember anything!”

“Why is this so much heavier then the other one?”

“Could it be the weight of my sins?! NOOOoooOoooOOOoo.”

“Okay then. You’ll regret it.”

“YAY! I LOVE GETTING CONSEQUENCES TO MY ACTIONS!!!”

“Where are you going?”

“To get MYSELF a gift cause somebody didn't get me one!”

“I told you I did! It’s coming here on Friday!”

*** knowing full well that ** got *** an engagement ring* “Wow, I can’t believe that!”

“What are you doing?”

“I don’t know. My brain told me to do it and I went ‘okay!’”

“**, I was thinking by the way.”

“That’s a bad start.”

“Are we…(something people usually hate)?”

*doing a lecture*

*** falls asleep*

“*, wake him up!”

“Why do I have to wake him up when you put him to sleep?!”

“(Band/choir/restaurant that no one likes because is actually really bad) is the best one!”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah?”

“Are you SURE?”

“Yeah!”

*later*

“I don’t know if she/he’s commit to the bit or you know…”

“Would you like to join our (choir/restaurant)?”

“No.”

“You answered that really quickly-“

“NO.”

*later*

“Why didn’t you give her/him one of your polite ‘no thank you’s?”

“No thank you.”

“Sorry guys, won’t be able to help for the next 9 months.”

“YOU’RE PREGNANT?!”

“No, I’m in a cast. My brother/sister pushed me off the roof. I broke my leg.”

“Also he’s male so how does that work?”

“What's worse than a heartbreak?”

“Stepping on a cat's tail and not being able to explain that you're sorry.”

“There’s Murphy’s Law, they say, and then there’s **’s Law – if something has the potential to go wrong, ** will be there to push it in just the direction to make it happen.”

“Help! They won’t leave.”

“Ma’am, sir, wha’ver you is, I don ca’e. Get out.”

“*teasing while saying best ways to go on a date with their child/sibling*”

“***!”

“Take this as a substitution for a shovel talk. I’m shoving you two together instead.”

*Laughs* “Babe, you had a crush on me? That’s embarrassing-“

“We’re married.”

“You might not know this, **, but I am a flawed person.”

“I do know that.”

“Breathe, just breathe.”

“I’ve done nothing with my life! I’m a failure!”

“Awww, that never bothered you before.”

“I bet if you look ‘self absorbed’ up in a dictionary, you’d find your picture.”

“My picture’s in the dictionary? Is it a good one? What am I wearing?”

“We can't lose. Because we have this.” *points to his chest*

“We have heart?”

“Heart? No, me. I'm pointing at myself. I'm going to win this for us.”

“What’s the straightest thing you’ve ever done?”

*sighs* “I killed a man.”

“Are you regarded?”

“Yeah I’m regarded.”

“Can you be serious for five minutes?”

“My record is four, but I think I can do it.”

*telling a story about two friends that they knew*

“for ** and * are both happily married”

“To each other, you can't convince me otherwise”

“Okay let’s go-“

*is playing with something they shouldn’t/something breakable* “Put that down.”

“You can find practically everything at a junk shop!”

“Except a will to live.”

“That’s expensive to get. How much you paying?”

“Dinosaurs aren't extinct. I mean, *** is walking in this room.”

“What did you two do?”

“………..”

“You’re not in trouble, I just need to know if I have to lie to the police again or not.”

“Of course I have a lot of pent-up rage, you fool! I've been the same height since I was twelve!”

“More like since You eight.”

“I’m the sexiest bitch in this therapy waiting room.”

“And that’s not concerning to you?”

“**, you’ve done a crime. You’ve done it again.”

“Oh no.”

*cocks gun* “Go to Bed. This is no longer a request, This is now a Threat.”

“Hello all, it is I, your favorite person.”

“Actually, *** is my favourite.”

“Okay then, it is I, that bitch.”

“If I'm extra sarcastic with you it probably means I'm flirting with you or you really annoy me and I can't handle your crap... have fun figuring out which one.”

“I think that was a threat. Send help.”

“I love tea!”

“Oh so your British?”

“We’ve been dating for three years. You know this.”

“** what's your type?”

“(* their lover).”

“That's sweet.”

“It's also a lie, his type is (hair colour).”

“That's not true!”

“The first person you ever had a crush on was a (hair colour) man.”

(Optional)

“I met * long before I met ****.”

*spews water* “****?!”

“I was talking about ******.”

“I never had a crush on ******!?”

“That's bullshit.”

“Are we gonna talk about the **** thing or... No....? Okay.”

“No it's not!”

“It most definitely is.”

“What?”

“You blushed every time you were around him.”

“I- I did not!”

“Yeah you did.”

“No....?”

“Even the way you talked about him sometimes I could tell you had a crush on him at one point.”

*flabbergasted* I- I huh? Did I?”

*walks over* Hey ** can you- What did you guys do to him?”

*wide eyed staring at the ground, mumbling incoherently*

“He's having an existential crisis, give him a minute.”

“I think-“

“That’s a dangerous thing coming from you.”

“(Very different name from their own. Not even a little bit similar)!”

“Have many times I got to tell you my name ain’t (not their name). My name is ***, *** (last name).”

“I have a confession to make.”

*gasps*

“I was caught eavesdropping on (day).”

“*tells a fake story to promote something of theirs, like an event or store*.”

“So moral of the story, (stock/tickets for event) are running out.”

“Yeah can’t handle loud sounds. My ears are too sensitive.”

“How do you survive (parties/parades/concerts)?!”

“I don’t.”

“I really don't want to go.”

“Stay calm and trust yourself.”

“Say you're ill.”

“Pretend to break your leg.”

“Really break your leg.”

“Ah yes. The mysterious and beautiful *, so demure…”

“…I wonder what sort of melodic sounds this wonderful being makes?”

*screaming*

“FUCK YOU.”

*raises eyebrow*

“Ew no. Go die in a hole.”

“Please, stay out of trouble.”

“Not my strong suit.”

“Cry me a river so I could drown in it.”

“That’s not what I meant by that.”

“Then what did you mean, huh?”

“What’s happening?”

“*** said I can’t hang out with his dog/cat.”

“My dog/cat’s at the vet.”

“Wait so your parent/sibling/friend is the (leader/owner of like some kind of animal), right?”

“Yeah..”

“Is that why (animal) keeps attacking me!? I thought he/she/they liked me!”

“Oh ****..”

“I didn’t miss that social cue, I thought it was stupid.”

“Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, and wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.”

“That's deep.”

“That means that ketchup is a smoothie.”

“That's deeper.”

“...You guys are idiots.”

“So, how long have you and * been together?”

“No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. * and I are not together. No. No.

“Really? Sixteen ‘no’s? Really?”

*Finally stands up to abuser/person that hurt them both*

“Babe that was hot.”

“How hot?”

“So hot you should do it every time.”

“I’m working on it…”

* carrying a box* “What would you say if- if I, hypothetically, came home with 7 kittens one day?”

“….”

“What’s in the box?”

“What woul-“

“**, what’s in the box?”

“I think you know.”

“You know I can drive.”

“Drive me Crazy?”

“Hey hey hey!”

“You don’t talk to me like that.”

*does no with finger*

“What’s your real name?”

“Chris********.”

“Isn’t that Christ?”

“THATS THE BEST ONE!”

“*flirting*”

“I got a man/woman.”

“Small thing. You could have two.”

“Nah he/she loyal.”

“God, you’re SO clingy.”

“YOU came into MY bed?!”

“Anyone else gave that awkward moment where they have a crush on their wife/husband?”

“No- because I already married them? I had a crush on them since we started dating? Are you okay?”

“So, are you two dating now?”

** and *** “Yes.”

“Why?”

“I happen to find ** very appealing.”

“Yeah, I can understand that. I'm trying to figure out what's wrong with **.”

*lying down and crying*

“There, there. Why don’t you take some time off to not be around me while you’re like this?”

“The difference is that kids are helpfully unhelpful. They will make the job harder. Teens are unhelpfully helpful, also cable of malicious compliance.”

“You told me to unload the dishwasher. Not put it away.”

“Ow!”

“What’s wrong?”

“I have a weird pain right above my eyebrow. “

“It’s called a stress headache. I got my first one when I was four.”

*sibling that’s four years younger walks in*

“Why are you wearing red?”

“It’s orange!”

“That’s red.”

“*tries explaining why it’s actually dark orange and not red*.”

“And that’s black-“

“At least you know what black is.”

“Hello?”

*** looms over* “Oh your close…”

*looms over more* “Your getting close..”

*looms over even more* “You getting real close-“

“I’m going to murder someone.”

“Yay! Murder!”

“But his name is **!”

“Anyone named ** is on my hit list.”

“He sees you because he had eyes. Not because he likes you.”

“Is that why he kissed me like a bowl of soup yesterday? Cause he has a mouth?”

“A bowl of- what is he a dog?”

“Yeah he doesn’t listen very closely to what you say cause he cares. It’s because he has ears.”

“Is that why he scratching my arm as if he was marking it? Cause he has hands with nails?”

“WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS MAN?!”

“I’ve been waiting for an hour!”

“What time did you finish?”

“(An hour ago). My (person that picks them up) only comes when my family member/friend finishes.”

“Wow. That’s homophobic.”

*sees child walking in looking for someone*

“Hey! Who you for? I’ma theft you!”

*pretend hitting friend/family member*

“Don’t hurt him/her! She/he’s fragile..”

“Sometimes.”

*makes *** a cup of tea but puts salt in it*

*** sips tea*

“…”

*** finishes tea*

“Didn't it taste bad?”

“Yeah, but I didn't want to hurt your feelings so I drank it all.”

*tearing up* “Oh, okay.”

“Good morning.”

“You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit.”

“MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS!”

“Recently someone asked me how i put up with him. and the answer is i don’t.”

“**?”

“Of course.”

“Look! Can your religion telling explain that?!”

“Can your science explain why it rains?”

“Yes! Yes, it can!”

“hey, ***! what if we got a dog?”

“Huh? we already have a dog. **, remember?”

“What?! Why am I the dog?!”

“two bros chilling in a bed, not a millimetre in between cause they’re so gay.”

“Stop devoting yourself to a man.”

“Um, excuse me. This is my girlfriend.” *points to man in a dress*

“Yeah. Okay. Fair.”

*playing a game but teammate made a mistake*

“When you mess up, I don’t give a fuck. I just continue.”

“WE MAKE NO MISTAKE!”

“This Girl is on fire!”

“No really she’s on fire. She’s on fire! Put her put!”

“Have you seen this boy/girl?!”

“Not today thankfully!”

“Does that dog bite?”

“It don’t got a single teeth in its mouth.”

*shows rows of very sharp teeth*

“He/she may be a dumpster fire, but he/she's MY dumpster fire.”

“...This thing must be broken.”

“Murder?”

“Yes.”

“Question.”

“Answer.”

“Murder?”

“I’d love to do that right now, any kind, especially suicide.”

“I'm cold.”

“Here, take my hoodie.”

*meanwhile*

“I'm cold.”

“I can't control the weather, **.”

“What time did you wake up today?”

*screatch* “Sorry.”

“**, what time did you wake up today?”

“3….pm..But before I moved I use to wake up 5.”

“Wha- what time did you go sleep!?”

“10.”

“10 pm!?”

“Am…”

“Heh, and what’s a tiny kid like you even capable of?” *pats head*

“I killed a man.”

“…” *removes hand*

“Hey, can you do me a favor?”

“Sorry, I have to go do literally anything other than this.”

“You don’t even have a legitimate reason?”

“Oh, no, I do.”

“Well, what is it?”

“You see, I simply don’t give a fuck.”

“Listen up. I’ve got one good reason why you should listen to me, instead of **. Look at what I can do!” *does a one-armed handstand*

“What does that have to do with anything?”

“No, no, she's got a point.”

“And that’s why-“

*starts walking away*

“Hey! You get back here!”

*starts walking away then turning back around*

*sees that their parent came on time for them*

“WOOOOOO! Yeah!”

“Wait- come here!”

“Oh right-“ *hugs neck tightly* “WOOOO!”

“If karma doesn't hit you, I fucking will.”

“When I first got my autism diagnosis, my first thought was “woah… it’s canon” and I think that maybe thoughts like that is why *** made me get tested.”

“Merry Christmas!”

“IT’S AUGUST!”

“I would never kiss a man.”

“You kissed *** and ** in the span of 15 seconds. What do you mean ‘I’ll never kiss a man’?!”

“Here’s how to hype up your girl/boyfriend while he/she struggles to learn (their native language).”

“My (language is getting no where. I understand nothing.”

“That’s not true. I will play you a (language) conversation and you will tell me how much you understand.”

*(children cartoon in language)*

*surprise face* “I understand all of it! I understand (language)!”

“It’s a conversation designed for a 6 year old to understand but we don’t have to point that out to her/him.”

“Which one of us do you think is gunna die first?”

“I hope it’s me.”

*laughs in drunk*

“I hope so too!”

*watching a conversation between their friend/lover and a god*

“*something bad that happened to the last person*”

“That won’t happen to me right?”

“It better not!”

“I’ve never fought a god before but I’m willing to try everything once!”

“No.”

“No what?”

“You can’t kill me. You don’t have my consent to kill me so no.”

“Alright, have a nice day.”

“I’m taking away your straightness.”

“Oh no..my straightness…whatever will I do?”

“Ugh! The past is in the past!”

“Yeah yeah yeah. And my fist can fit up your ass.”

“My pronouns are he/him but my gender is Danger.”

*sees friend/lover.*

*hands food.*

*they don’t eat it so puts in mouth and they start eating.*

*realises they are half asleep.* “Wake up!”

“Huh- what- what am I eating?”

“*food*.”

“Can I have some water?”

*starts chugging her/his water bottle*

*chokes from drinking too fast*

*spills water all over him/herself*

*coughing* “I don't have any water.”

“Hey I’m about to get in the shower. You wanna join me?”

“There’s a pistol taped underneath the island in the kitchen. If I ever say no to that question, I want you to shoot me. Aim for the head, don’t stop until I’m dead.”

“I’m really glad “fight me” has replaced “sue me” in the common vernacular because I don’t have money, but I do have fists and I am always angry.”

*13th birthday is soon*

“Yes finally! I’m going to be a teenager! I can destroy the world!”

*their friends accidentally crossed into magic persons land*

“Did you do something to them?”

“I only revealed their true forms.”

“You turned them into pigs…”

“I failed at raising a tamagotchi how the fuck am I supposed to raise a child.”

“Do you ever love them so much you’d kill for them, but also want to strangle them sometimes?”

“…”

“Just me?”

*raises hand*

“No ***, put down your hand, your apart of the problem.”

*lowers hand*

“Are you straight?”

“Straight from hell.”

“Did you know that your sister/brother is a robber?”

“Yeah, she/he stole my life, happiness, and sanity.”

“My mother’s my spawn point.”

“Then what’s your dad?”

“World generator.”

“You wanna tell me how this happened?”

“Well, *** thought-“

“Oh man, I wish that (wo)man would stop doing that.”

“And you see her/him! He/she did nothing!”

“I did my nails…”

“Oh, is that bag new?”

“Yeah, my daughter/son claimed the other one.”

“**, you are very hard woman/man to keep track of.”

“It’s called allusive, darling.”

“What’s the bravest thing you’ve ever said?”

“Help. Asking for help isn’t giving up, it’s refusing to give you.”

“So your telling me I made a volcano with baking soda and you are trying to take over the world.”

“Yeah.”

“Come on **, do it for our friendship. You can't put a price on that...”

“Yes I can, dear. Fifty dollars.”

“Hey can I-“

“No, I don’t have time to get you out of jail for the next two weeks.”

“No I was going to-“

“No, *** been on my ass since the last time.”

“No I want to-“

“** hates when you do that. Don’t try.”

“Get ingredients to bake. I want to bake.”

“Yeah I still don’t trust you to do it.”

“I want a hamster and you want a baby. What- what is this?”

“My mother always said that it’s impossible to mess up chicken wings.”

“Unless your ** that is.”

“Is murder illegal?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Cause your killing someone.”

“What if it’s ***?”

“Uhm-“

“You ever see something that changes your life and you're just like ‘huh..’”

“I saw you.”

“Honestly that's so cute and sweet but it kinda makes this awkward because I was gonna show you a picture of * in a turkey costume.”

“Okay buh bye! Stay stay!”

“Mhm hm you too.”

“Off yourself.”

“Kill yourself.”

“You're making me look bad!”

“Ok. Number one, you don't need my help to do that.”

“How many hours of sleep have you gotten?”

“Over what period of time?”

“…I don’t like that answer.”

“You know, there’s something weird going on with your face?”

“What?”

“You’re smiling! I didn’t know you could do that?”

“How much sense you got?”

“Oh I got 50 cents!”

“Not what I mean…”

*reading a recipe* “Beat three eggs?”

“It means like in hand-to-hand combat.” “Ohhhh-“

“Both of you get out of this kitchen.”

“*investigating person who has a crush on sibling/parent*”

“If this singing business doesn’t work out, you should be a psychiatrist.”

“You know the story on the radio gets crazy when everyone stops talking and the volume gets turned up.”

“(Description of ***) has been found placing bombs on government property.”

“Nah that’s just a regular Thursday.”

“You know at first it made me feel ‘what?!’ 😡 but then it made me feel ‘what..?😔.”

“You did not just say those emojis out loud.”

“Well duh! I have to explain how it made me feel very angry face emoji verse sad face emoji.”

“For self defense reasons, I'm going to pretend to be a burglar and you guys have to act wisely.”

“Okay.”

“If you don't want to die, give me all your money.”

“Bold of you to assume I have money.”

“Bold of you to assume I don't want to die.”

“Bold of you to assume I can die.”

“I would do anything for money.”

*later*

*covered in blood* “THE STATEMENT STILL STANDS!”

This is for you Bunny(I KNOW YOU SEE THIS, DONT LIE)

I have been collecting incorrect quotes from IRL, things online or my own self. Have at it. I have to many and I really want to share :D

“You know, I used to think that ** was a bad influence on you.”

*arm stuck in somewhere it shouldn’t be*“Oh?”

“Now I realize that you both influence each other to do equally stupid things.”

“What has the world come to?!”

“Depression.”

“You can't make everyone like you; you're not **.”

“What? Not everyone likes **.”

“Who doesn't like **?!”

“Uh”

***, gripping *'s shoulders with the intensity of a thousand burning suns “Names, *, now. GIVE ME THEIR NAMES”

**(female) struggling to to open something so asks ****(male) to help but **** can’t open it so they ask ***(female) to help and they open it

“See ****, you have to become more feminine”

“What-“

“Cause even with barely any nails or with long nails the girls can open it better then you!”

“What do we say to the universe when we’re having a bad day?”

“How dare you seek to inconvenience me. I have been through things that you can’t fathom.”

“Why does it feel like the world fights me in every turn!?”

“Eat good food, happy thoughts come soon”

“Where is **?!”

“At very time and moment that is illegal to share-“

Honestly doesn’t take much to confuse me. I’m just a simple lad.

“YOU'RE A MONSTER! I'm so proud.”

“WHAT is wrong with you. It is so attractive”

"We're not dating, but we're devoted toeach other, and get jealous if someone hits on the other, but we are just friends"

“i'll cut your throat open, that'll shut you up!"

"you're beautiful...”

“Seems like I touch a nerve”*touches their own broken nerve* “AAAAH-“

"** brought emotional trauma to a knife fight”

“How much longer are we going to wait?”

“Just... give it a few more minutes.”

* ** continues to forcefully push at a door that says pull on it*

“I just drove thru a rainbow” -*

“am I gay now?” -*

“a gay drive-thru?”-**

“Cheers!”

“To what?”

“To my most beautiful and amazing boyfriend/girlfriend!”

“Huh? What? Do you have another one?”

“By the power invested in me.. gay”

“This is the best financial decision I’ve ever made”

“What colour you want? Red or white?”

“Thats blue and gold.”

“OH- thats a mistake!”

“What colour are the balloons?”

“Red(white), green(gold), purple(blue)”

“I thought you were blind but turns out your blind and colourblind”

(Extra)

“What?”

“I literally just ask what was next.”

“Huh?!”

“Oh so you’re deaf, blind, stupid and colourblind!”

“Oh i forgot your deaf, blind, stupid and colourblind! What don’t you have?!”

“Colours.”

“**, what don’t you have?”

“Brains?”

“What is this?! Vomit green!?”

“It’s olive..”

“It a mistake, that’s what it is.”

“Are you excited for (school name)?”

“Why would I ever be excited about school?”

“In my defence, I was left unsupervised!”

“I think I’ll die actually. Let’s try it!”

“You have to upgrade from a bystander and become-“

“A bully!”

“What you got there?”

*Very dangerous person behind them* “A smoothie?”

“Ah, yeah, I’ve heard about that! Rates are crazy in the States, right?”

“I’m from Canada.”

“Oh.”

“** you don’t have to talk. I have to talk.”

“If you push me, I can push you back.”

“No. You can’t.”

*in the other room*“Can I come out?”

“You’re gay?!”

“No! I can out like that last year!”

“I am a mosaic of every person I have ever loved”

“You Know other men/woman/gays and didn’t tell me?!”

“So, how did you two meet?"

“...You know, we actually legally can't answer that."

“As a members of the high gay council, he is gay.”

“Shout out to (person), gotta be one of my favourite genders”

“We'll blow up that bridge when we come to it."

"Nothing is getting blown up, **."

"The bridge is!"

“Not with that attitude”

“Remember guys, pain is just weakness leaving the body”

“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade, make life take them back.”

“Aw, he’s cute and stupid. I’m keeping him.”

“He- he almost killed like half of us with that shit!”

“Shush.”

“Hey ** do you know about the autistic monkeys?”

“Wha- *laughs* N-nO”

“Good.”

*laughs* “that’s so funny, the autistic monkeys”

“I said Arctic Monkeys”

“Oh- *laughs* Y-yEah, I know the band”

“What- I mean monkeys that live in the arctic”

“Oh- we were not on the same page for this entire conversation”

“I DID IT! I MADE HER/HIM CRY!”

“In another life, I would have really liked just doing laundry and taxes with you”

“I- thanks?”

“Who needs hygiene when you got cake?”

“Your horrible and I love you”

#I’ve been forgetting to post these for a month or so #thos one is extra long :3 #have fun!#Can I say that the first one will forever be my favourite #just for the context of what actually happened

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buckybarnesdiaries · 4 years ago

Text

bucky barnes x reader. masterlist.

part 1 — part 2 (soon)

a / n. this is a series of 15 mini-drabbles to celebrate the 500 followers' milestone, based on one word for each story. this first part contains 8, and the next one contains 7. it was supposed to be posted one story per day, but by that way, it'd take me to last an eternity to post other works / requests.

words. 1.533.

warning, tags. none, just a bunch of fluffy and cute situations with bucky.

join my tag list.

necklace;

It was the first time since you started to date that Bucky had to leave for a mission. Neither of the two of you knew when he'd be back, and that got you worried than ever. You were conscious of what he did for a living when you met him, but you couldn't help but feel scared. Next to the front door of your apartment, Bucky left his backpack on the floor, leaning to cup your cheeks on his palms and kiss your lips tortuously slow.

“I'll be okay, (Y/N)”. He murmured keeping his eyes closed.

“You better”.

Your hidden threat made him giggle. The soldier felt goosebumps bristling his skin as your fingertips toured his neck blindly, just to put in place the chain of his necklace. But soon, Bucky stopped your moves to take it off from him and place his dog tags on you.

“I'll come back for them”. He promised, fixing his pale blue orbs on yours, holding your hands to bring them to his lips and place fond kisses on every knuckle of both. “I love you, don' forget it, okay?”

“I won't... How could I, Buck?”

eclipsed;

Bucky was sweating, still not believing he was about to get married to the love of his life. He was on the altar, waiting for you and surrounded by all of your friends in common. Steve had had to help him with a panic attack he had suffered while dressing up, thinking that maybe you could change your opinion at the last moment. He couldn't blame you. But all those doubts vanished at the second you crossed the huge, heavy doors of the church. Your beauty eclipsed him, wearing a white lace wedding dress and seeming like you floated over the floor. Just like an angel.

His heart jumped. His oceanic eyes got covered in tears. A giggle escaped his lips, stretching a hand towards you, still praying it's not a dream. And you noticed the tension and the nervousness running his veins, leaning forward to kiss his cheek with all the love you felt for your future husband.

“Can't wait to say yes”. You whispered into his ear, causing Bucky to lace his arms around you and embrace you tight and tenderly. “I love you, James, from now and forever”.

sunset;

After his most recent nightmare and walking all grumpy from one side of another around your house, you decided to cheer him up only like you can do. With reluctance, you managed to get him out of your apartment and drag him to your car. Bucky was like a child, cross-armed, lips puckered and frowning annoyed. He tried to hide the fact that he had another nightmare to not worry you, but you weren't stupid.

Thinking that glimpsing the beach throughout the large front window would make him feel happier, your boyfriend just reclined himself on the seat, causing you to roll your eyes. That mood changed as soon as Bucky was sitting on the sand, between your legs, tho. His back was resting against your chest and his neck was wrapped by one of your arms, watching fascinated the sunset on the horizon. He wouldn't recognize it, but he felt much better hearing the waves crashing into the shore, while you stroked his scalp tenderly using the tip of your nails.

“You're welcome, grumpy mummy”.

clingy;

You didn't want to drink, but Sam and Sarah wanted to celebrate that the family business was picking up. On another occasion, you wouldn't mind, but Bucky was there. So, when everything started to spin around, you lead your clumsy steps to the edge of the harbor, having a sit there and let the soft breeze help you.

“Stop”. You heard from behind.

“Uh?”

“You're stealing my antisocial personality”. Bucky chuckled, taking a seat by your side. “What's up? Why are you here all alone?”

“Truth or lie?” You asked tilting your head towards him, raising both eyebrows.

“Truth”. He scoffed as if it wasn't obvious.

“I'm too clingy when I'm drunk”.

“Can't see the problem there”.

You chuckled, shaking your head inevitably, causing him to pucker his lips with a funny grimace.

“What?”

“Tru—”.

“Truth”.

“I've been all night wanting to rub your beard”.

Bucky exploded in loud laughter, not believing your words until you put your hands on his jawline. “God... It's so soft”.

His laughs increased, causing you to burn in shame. “No more drinks for you, ma'am...”

But the fact was that he turned to you, so it could be easy to caress his face.

safe;

Bucky was deadly tired on the sofa, warmly cuddled between your arms. A while ago, he stopped to pay attention to the movie, turning his back to the TV to hide his exhausted expression on your chest. You placed the cozy blanket over your bodies, making sure it covered both of you, being aware that tonight you'd sleep there. You felt sorry just at the thought of waking him up, seeing him peacefully breathing and his face more relaxed than the last few days.

Shutting off the TV and stretching an arm above your head, you turned off the small lamp on the auxiliary table close to the sofa, before getting comfier by Bucky's side. Your boyfriend purred delighted, still sleepy, as your fingers got tangled on his hair and started to scratch his scalp slowly, urging you somehow to place a leg over his waist, so he could settle between both a little more closely.

“Feel better?”

“I feel safe”. He replied in a low breath, to exhale the sweet scent concentrated on your neck.

“You're safe, James. You're at home”. Your calmed tone made him sigh, snuggling you strongly.

stay;

You snapped awake because of some knocks on the front door. Tossing the sheets to a side of the bed, you grabbed the gun under your pillow. It was stupidity. If somebody wanted to kill you, that would be the last thing they'd do: knock the door. You walked slowly, step by step, through the main hallway aiming to the door, more than ready to shoot your assailant.

“It's... Bucky”. You heard from the other side.

Sighing in relief and closing your eyes for a split second, you left the weapon on the dinner table in the living room. Not doubting on opening the door, you couldn't help but raise an eyebrow when you noticed the reddened mark around his left eye and cheek.

“Can I, uh... stay tonight with you?” Bucky inquired, licking his upper lip ashamed, bowing his eyes down to his boots covered in dust.

“C'mon, Sergeant”. You invited him to walk in, using such a sweet tone, while holding his cold hand.

He looked like shit but felt much better when his arms got wrapped around your waist and middle-back, hiding his face into your neck. Kicking the door shut, you embraced him tighter to your body.

notebook;

You were lying on the opposite side to Bucky on the sofa, but keeping your legs tangled. It was a rainy evening with nothing to do and you decided to start to read the book you bought last week. Your boyfriend was silently doing something in a notebook. Maybe writing memories, maybe doodling, you didn't know. But the third time you caught him staring at you, you had to ask.

“What?”

“Uh... nothing”. He whispered focused on the paper in front of his eyes.

“Whaaat?” You kicked his right leg with your bare foot causing him to chuckle.

“Nothing!” Bucky replied using the same playfully tone of voice.

Putting the book on the coffee table, you sat up to lie on top of him, cuddling between his legs and resting your head on his chest. Glancing to the sketch of yourself he was drawing, you raised your heart-eyes to his. It was such a piece of art. The drawing and Bucky. Both.

“I learned in Romania. It kept me sane sometimes”. He confessed, leaning to place a kiss on your forehead. “I want to remember you forever”.

marshmallow;

“Truth or dare?”

Bucky narrowed his eyes, leaning on the table just like you did, challenging him. He was trying to read your mind to figure out which were your intentions.

“Dare”. He answered firmly.

“Put twenty marshmallows in your mouth”.

The soldier stared at you in silence, watching him lick his inner cheek and push it with the tip of his tongue. He nodded his head then, grabbing the plastic bag without losing eye contact, to start to place —one by one— the sweets into his mouth. In less than thirty seconds, he looked like a squirrel with his cheek swollen. Bucky squinted at you again, triumphant.

“Hold on, I need to capture this moment”. You laughed, catching your phone to take a picture.

When the flash went off, he spitted a marshmallow like a shotgun. And you couldn't help but laugh.

“C'mon, Bu—”.

You didn't finish the sentence, being hit by another marshmallow slightly wet because of his saliva. Your grimace turned into a funny disgust, grabbing it back to throw it to his face.

“You're like a five years old in a body fos— STOP!” You ended up giggling as he spitted you the third one.

feedback is appreciated, please, leave a comment to let me know if you liked it.

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jumukus · 3 years ago

Text

A3! Translation: Tasuku Takato’s SSR [Straddle a Noble Steed] - Alpha Horseback Archery

Tasuku, Muku, Citron and Izumi joined a horseback archery trial thanks to the tickets Citron received from the neighborhood association.

Citron: Listen up, guys! I've got something good from the neighborhood association.

Izumi: Something good?

Muku: What is it, Citron-sama?

Citron: Book at this, everybody!

Itaru: You mean, "Look at this"?

Citron: Ta-dah! Four tickets to the horseback archery trial!

Izumi: Horseback archery!? You mean, the one where you ride a horse and shoot a bow?

Banri: Never knew there's a trial for that.

Citron: I'll be going on next weekend. Raise your hand if you can join!

Muku: Can I tag along? I want to try horseback archery!

Citron: I knew you'd say that, Muku! It's decided, then~.

Muku: Thank you! I hope I can hit the target with style.

Izumi: I'm sure you can, Muku-kun. You're good at horseback riding, after all.

Muku: Ehehe. I had fun riding a horse back then!

Itaru: I'll pass. I can already tell I'm going to fall from the horse.

Citron: I knew you'd say that, Itaru! It's decided, then~.

Itaru: How about you, Banri? I have a feeling you'll be good at it.

Banri: Haha, yeah, I probably can do it if I try but I have plans next weekend.

Citron: Oh, that's too bad! I wanted to see you doing horseback archery~.

Muku: Same here! Since I'm sure you will look cool doing that, I want to see it!

Izumi: There's nothing we can do since he has plans on that day. Such a shame, though, indeed.

Itaru: Not you all going, "Oh, that's too bad," when Banri could not join but said nothing when it was me. LOL.

Citron: How about you, Director?

Izumi: Huh? Me? I don't have any plans on that day…

Citron: You should join us, then! We have three people with this!

Izumi: What? I'm not really confident I can do it…

*door opens*

Tasuku: I'm home. What are you talking about?

Citron: Oh! To think you're back at this time, this must be good riddance!

Itaru: You mean, "God's guidance"?

Citron: Tasuku! Join us in horseback archery next weekend!

Tasuku: Horseback archery? I don't understand what you're talking about...

Banri: Citron got tickets to a horseback archery trial from the neighborhood association.

Muku: Since he has four tickets, including Citron-sama, Director-san and I will be joining…

Citron: The last ticket belongs to you, Tasuku!

Tasuku: Well, I don't mind. I don't have plans on that day, anyway. You'll be going too, right, Director?

Izumi: Looks like it…

Citron: In that case, the four of us will be going! I'm looking forward to it!

Citron: It's finally the day of the horseback archery trial! I'm so exited!

Muku: Me too!

Tasuku: I've already checked in at the reception. Go change your clothes at the building over there and gather here again.

Izumi: Women's dressing room is over there so let's meet up here again once we're done changing!

Tasuku: Okay.

Izumi: Wow! You all look good in that attire!

Tasuku: Do you think so? Well, that's great to hear…

The person in charge seemed to be having a hard time putting these clothes on me.

Izumi: You're tall, after all, Tasuku-san.

Citron: Oh, horseback archery attire is so cool! This is so exciting!

Muku: You also look great in that attire, Director!

Izumi: Thanks. I'm a lil bit nervous since I'm not really used to wearing traditional clothes.

Muku: Because Tasuku-san wore traditional clothes several times for plays before, you're somehow giving off this dignified vibes in that!

Citron: You look really, really confident!

Tasuku: Thanks. This time I'm wearing a Hakama, though. It's different from the ones I wore in "Die by the Sword" and "Hotel Compass".

It's a little bit hard to move around in this, but it's not like I can do something about it.

Person in charge: Everyone, we are going to start the trial now so please gather here.

Teacher: We are going to start with a horseback riding lesson. Get used to the horse you're riding today while trekking.

Izumi: Put your left foot here…okay.

Muku: What a calm and good kid. There, there.

Citron: I want to run fast! It reminds me of the long ride I took with Pochi back home!

Tasuku: You have a great posture, Citron. It makes sense since you're used to riding a horse.

Muku: The same goes for you, Tasuku-san! You look like a real samurai.

Izumi: I couldn't agree more. It's more impactful since you're wearing traditional attire now.

Teacher: Everyone in this group is talented. Are you all already used to riding horses?

Especially you. That's very impressive of you to sit up straight like that.

Tasuku: Are you referring to me?

Citron: Look at you, Tasuku! The teacher is praising you.

Muku: That's to be expected. Tasuku-san's posture is already good from the start. I think it also has something to do with your strong muscles.

Tasuku: I guess my years of experience on the stage has influenced me in some way. It has become a habit to straighten myself up.

Person in charge: Next, we're going to practice shooting a bow on the ground. This session will be split in two parts with lunch break in between.

Izumi: Whoa…! I never knew bows are quite heavy…!

Tasuku: It's pretty big in size, too. It's taller than me.

Muku: I heard Japanese-style bow is larger than the western-style one, and it can make your arrows fly farther.

Citron: It'll be hard to shoot while riding a horse!

Tasuku: Oh. I hit it.

Izumi: No way. You already hit the mark!?

Tasuku: You can say it's luck, I guess.

Citron: That's still great, though!

Muku: You're so talented, Tasuku-san! I have to do my best too!

Citron: Me too! I won't lose to you~.

Izumi: (Hehe. They seem to be having fun. I have to do my best to hit the mark as well!)

Tasuku: It's finally time. I hope we can do well, just like how we did during practice.

Citron: Tasuku, you also got praised for your archery skill, right!

Muku: While we didn't actually ride the horse during practice, you were still impressive for being able to hit the mark most of the time!

Izumi: Not only hitting the target, but quickly fitting the arrow to the bow is also difficult.

Teacher: We are going to move on to the actual horseback archery now. Try to aim for the mark over there. No need to rush.

Tasuku: No need to rush… Like this?

*shoots*

Muku: Y-You hit it!

*shoots*

Izumi: You hit it again!

Citron: Oh, would you look at that! He hit the center spots!

Teacher: It's so rare for participants to be able to do that. I don't usually let beginners do this, but… can you try running?

Tasuku: Is it really okay?

Teacher: Yes. I have a feeling you can do it.

Tasuku: I'll give it a try, then.

Muku: Whoa…! Running through with a horse while shooting an arrow… It feels like we're in a real battle!

Citron: This is true horseback archery!

Izumi: Do your best, Tasuku-san!

Tasuku: Thanks.

*shoots*

Teacher: It's a hit! Well done!

Participant A: Who is that man? He's so amazing!

Participant B: He's so good!

Participant C: So hot…!

Tasuku: ...phew.

Izumi: Great job, Tasuku-san!

CHOICE 1: That was flawless

Izumi: You hit the mark flawlessly despite running so fast like that.

Tasuku: It's actually quite the opposite. I did worse than I expected.

I could have run faster, and I could have done a better job at fixing the arrow to the bow.

Izumi: Really!? It was perfect in my eyes.

Tasuku: For me, I can't say I have shown the result of my practice enough.

Izumi: (He's really stoic…!)

CHOICE 2: It was as if I traveled back to the past.

Izumi: Seeing you shooting a bow in that attire made me feel like I traveled back to the past.

Tasuku: In that case, I might have done a better job at that if we were doing an etude set in Kamakura.

Like, let's say, while I'm on the run after kidnapping you, the daughter of the Lord… I will shoot my bow at the pursuers.

Izumi: That's a great plot!

Tasuku: ...On second thought, seeing you in that getup, I think it's more fitting to have you as a tomboy princess who ran away with me.

Izumi: A tomboy princess… But I'll go all out if it's for etude!

Tasuku: Haha. How reliable of you.

Muku: You were totally impressive, Tasuku-san!

Citron: I made the right choice inviting you here!

Tasuku: I had fun joining this trial as well. Thank you.

Muku: Today was so fun!

Tasuku: I would never try doing horseback archery if I didn't have an opportunity like this. I learned a lot.

Citron: I should offer my gratitude to the neighborhood association after this!

Izumi: Have you seen the photo we took in this attire? It came out great. See?

Muku: You're right! I want to show it to the others in the dorm.

Tasuku: Then, let's get go--.

Teacher: Hey, wait up!

Tasuku: Yes?

Teacher: Thank goodness. You're still here. I actually have a request for you.

Tasuku: What is it?

Teacher: Do you… want to try aiming for the top in horseback archery!?

Troupe Members: Come again!?

Teacher: I'm sure you can be Japan's top horseback archery athlete! Please join my team.

Tasuku: I don't think I can do that. I'm an actor.

Teacher: In that case, can you at least join the next tournament…!?

Tasuku: Even if you say that…

Teacher: Oh, right! There's an annual event called "Horseback Archery Festival".

If it's alright with you, can you take part as a guest at that event?

Tasuku: Well, I don't mind appearing as a guest…

Teacher: Thank you so much! I'm looking forward to your appearance.

Izumi: (Being invited as a guest despite being an amateur… Tasuku-san, you're way too awesome…)

#a3!#a3! translation #spring troupe #summer troupe #autumn troupe #winter troupe #itaru chigasaki #citron #muku sakisaka #banri settsu #tasuku takato

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loosesodamarble · 2 years ago

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Ooooh! Now we get Heinrich trivia!

1) Man, I didn't know becoming a devil gave you 20/20 vision. Maybe I ought to be transformed into a devil instead of constantly getting new prescriptions. 😆 Would Heinrich consider wearing glasses with fake lens if he ever missed wearing them? 🤔

2) I knew it! I knew Heinrich was the one to start the pretty Faust trend! The Faust men are all pretty and feminine because of Heinrich! 👏 (Except Morgen and Nacht's dad. The genes skipped a generation. 🙄)

3) Haphephobia? Oh dear. I've read about it in the past and having a fear of being touched sounds so isolating. But if Heinrich has people he trusts and feels safe with having physical contact with, that's good. ☺️💖 It's not about getting rid of the fear, it's about learning to not let it control your life (at least that's what I've heard).

4) Transformation magic can do a lot but it can't completely alter how one's body works. I bet Heinrich is very comfortable playing with his gender a bit. At least when Vanessa had him dress as a woman, he seemed cool with it.

5) Ah, he's a man that likes to keep his most private and intimate relationships lowkey. He's a man in love but he doesn't need to broadcast it. Not like he can really talk too much about his relationship with Lucifugus either. 😅

6) Everyone younger than 700 is baby. That would include the Witch Queen! Kksfhasieuatstas! Heinrich, the old as dirt grandpa./lh+j We love grandpa Heinrich though.

7) Askhgasirta! I mean Nacht's actual parents are dead and Nacht is his descendant so it's fair game. Free child for Heinrich. 🤣

8) Wait what? 👀 Heinrich drew a picture of Josele once? That's so sweet of him! And it's nice that he sees her as family. (Otherwise her marrying Nacht would be kinda awkward./lh)

9) 👏 Yeah! There it is!

10) Uwaaaaah! No not Heinrich and Discordia talking about losing their kids. The world nearly ended because Discordia was a heartbroken mama and adopted a devil! 😭

11) 😰 Hoo boy! That's right. Plague devil. And sickness is pretty lethal! I'm... I'm just gonna go wash my hands and disinfect the house. No sick germs around me please./lh+j

12) Poison immunity will certainly explain why he can digest his own cooking. (I swear, the way you drew his cooking that one time was the perfect blend of hilarious and horror! Qwhgisusrt!) How does he look at his cooking and not think something is off though? 🤣 Charmy needs to give him cooking lessons, stat!

13) Not only does becoming a devil fix your vision, it gives you a dye job! It's just a whole makeover! (Which explains the many outfits Nacht gets from his devils.) What do you know!

Fact’s abaut Heinrich Faust

Becaus of boringness

Fact

1)Heinrich have wear glasses as Human but as he turn into a devil he doesn’t need them anymore

2)Heinrich have a feminine body type and have this what you call perfect leg’s

3) Heinrich have Haptophobie and let’s just people tush him he love ore see as Family

4)Heinrich can shape shift and can take female form but can’t get pregnant there he is not born whit ova

5)Heinrich really don’t like too talk abaut his love life but if he do it he do it

6) four Heinrich are all creatures down of 700 jears children in he’s eyes

7) Heinrich See Nacht as his child

8)in crossover whit @loosesodamarble oc josele have Heimrich a draw picture of her in he’s room there he see her as Family

9)Heinrich is Demi sexual

10)Heinrich really like too talk in crossover whit @lyranova oc Discordia there they both lost in on why there children and she know what she talking

11)Heinrich cause the death of Milliarden of humans in he’s past

12)Heinrich can’t get poison this is why he fink his coking is good because he don’t get sick and his cooking taste good

13)Heinrich’s hair whas Blood but it’s turn black as he became a devil

#black clover #black clover oc #heinrich faust #marune's oc #marune the devil delight #josele canty #soda's ocs #discordia helheim #lyra's oc #reblogged post

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arthurconanstark · 3 years ago

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A STUDY IN LONDON

Summary: Alexandra Stark is trying to make a new life for herself in London, she's trying to move on. This new life takes a turn when she crosses path with the only consulting Detective in the world.

Warnings: Foul language , mentions of PTSD , character death, violence.

CHAPTER 1

London streets are always this busy on weekday mornings. Alexandra walks towards the police station holding in a yawn. Okay , so staying up reading last night probably wasn't the best decision she's ever made. Add another one to list of bad decisions. She enters and let's out a sigh of relief as it's much warmer inside the building . A hot cup of coffee and maybe this morning can be salvaged.

"Hey Alex!" beams Chris from the behind a few desks. "Rough morning already ?" he laughs a little . "Nothing some caffeine can't fix.", she smiles back. Chris is an intern here , much like herself. He joined in a few days after she did, about a month ago . The internship wasn't particularly exciting , she had been expecting to see and learn a lot more than she actually was , all Detective Anderson gave her a chance to learn was how he likes his coffee and how to do his paperwork. She wasn't the biggest fan of her mentor but its not like she gets to choose.

She quickly says her goodbyes to Chris and walks towards Anderson's office . She doesn't bother to get herself a coffee first as she knows that's the first thing she's gonna be doing for him today.

"morning Sir. How are you doing today?" She asks , not making any effort to sound interested in actually finding out. "Ah. Miss Stark! You're late today. I've been waiting for a coffee for hours !" He says exaggerating. "I'm sorry , I ran into some traffic" she lies. "Oh well! Now why don't you run to the coffee shop real quick, hm?"

She lets out an unnoticeable sigh. It's not like she's surprised , but she can't help but be disappointed everyday.

She comes back to his office 10 minutes later with a cup of coffee in her hand. She finished hers on the way back . The office is empty. She contemplates leaving it there but decides to hand it over to him instead.

"Hey Detective Jones , have you seen Mr. Anderson?"

"Oh yeah he's in Inspector Lestrade's office."

"Okay thanks!"

"No problem dear."

She'll never get used to how polite British people are , well most of them at least.

*knock knock*

"YES!?" Greg Lestrade's gravelly voice replies. Inspector Lestrade is a good man. Good at his job. They've interacted about 3 times since she came here, but she already likes him better than her mentor.

"Hi!" She opens the door ," I brought your coffee sir."

"Well you could've waited!" Anderson says a little loud, clearly annoyed at something. And now she's annoyed too. Even more than before.

"You clearly need it way too much." She replies calmly shoving the cup into his hand.

His eyes widen in anger , though it has no effect on her. Philip Anderson is not an intimidating man. Before he says something , a loud snort echos the room , making her avert her gaze from the annoying man to the one sitting in the corner of the room . He's dressed in a black suit , though most of it is covered by his huge coat . Opal eyes and dark brown curly hair on top of sharp cheekbones giving an edge to his appearance.

He gets up from his seat and walks towards the desk .

"The anniversary party was the perfect cover. Push her down the stairs, blame it on the alcohol." The blue eyed man speaks , voice deep.

"Oh bullshit!" Anderson yells. " You just want to make a fuss of an open and shut case to feed your weird crime fantasies!"

"No but he's right!" Alexandra states a little too loudly. All four pairs of eyes turn to her.

Wait, four?? Has the short blonde man been here the whole time??

She gulps , suddenly a little more self conscious. As she tries to continue, Anderson cuts her off, " What are you still doing here?! I got the coffee , now go work."

" YES but I'm just saying .."

"I don't care. Get out." He cuts her off again.

"Anderson shut up and drink your coffee." The man says, walking around him and towards her. "Preferably in the corner so I don't have to see your face."

He turns to look at her , now standing right in front of her. "You were saying?" He was clearly enjoying her affirmation.

Alex gained a little confidence. "The blood splatter on the bottom seems like it isn't from a single hit but multiple. Which makes sense cuz the stairs aren't nearly enough to kill her that quick. Plus Mrs Rivera was a known alcoholic , and she couldn't possibly have been that tipsy from the little alcohol content in her blood according to the forensic reports. "

She looked up to meet an amused smirk on his face. He was looking her up and down , though she wasn't uncomfortable under his gaze , he wasn't checking her out , no , it's almost as if he was reading her. Alexandra Stark is used to people trying to read her , failing mostly , but trying nonetheless. You can't expect less when you're the only daughter of Tony Stark, the controversial genius billionaire philanthropist. His eyes snapped up to hers, "Good to know not everybody in Scotland Yard's an idiot. No offence ,Garry.", he says turning to Lestrade.

"It's Greg, and I'll bring him him in tomorrow but we still need more evidence Sherlock!"

"Well that's your job, not mine."

"Sherlock!" Insists the blonde man.

Sherlock pauses for a moment "Fine! I'll go to the scene today."

Sherlock........Sherlock......Sherlock....wait!! Is he .....

"I'm sorry , Sherlock as in ...Sherlock Holmes? From 'A study in pink' ?" She says, suddenly visibly excited. Her eyes turned to Lestrade who's pleased expression gave her the answer she was looking for. "Oh wow!!! I read the blog and I can't tell you how much I loved it!"

His stoic face hid his amusement as he said "Well thank you, John paints quite a picture of me.", he says gesturing to the blonde man.

Oh so that's John Watson!

"Oh my God! It's so nice to meet you John! I mean ....Mr.Watson...sorry."

He laughs "John is fine. And thank you very much."

"Alright! Enough lazing around!" Anderson interferes, "There's files in my office that need organizing. Go and make yourself useful."

Ugggggghhh what's his fucking problem!

Not in the mood to argue anymore, she sighs "Yes sir." and leaves the room.

The rest of the day goes by smoothly though Alex can't help but wish she could see THE Sherlock Holmes in action. But hey, maybe she will some other day , now that she knows he's acquainted with Lestrade.

She returns to the loneliness of her apartment that evening a little happier than most days. It's a big apartment, her father wanted her to be as comfortable as possible when he bought it for her. It's the least he thought he could do after what she'd been through in the past six months. But the size of the apartment only exaggerated her solitude. Not that she'd ever say that to her father , she didn't want him to worry more than he already did , which was a lot. The TV played in the background while she fixed herself a 'dinner' from whatever she had lying around in the fridge. That's what she does on days when she isn't eating takeout or PB&J for dinner. She falls asleep that night with the usual thoughts going through her head, thoughts of her home back in New York, her mom, her dad, uncle Steve, her best friend Peter, the little shop near her house , the gunshot ...

NO . No. Not the gunshot. No.

...the office, her brief meeting today with the two men, and hopes of tomorrow being maybe a little more interesting. And interesting it will be. Tomorrow things will change.

#bbc sherlock #marvel #tony stark #sherlock holmes #john watson #alternate universe

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swanlake1998 · 4 years ago

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Pointe Magazine Article: Onstage, I'm a Professional Dancer. Offstage, I've Been Racially Profiled by Law Enforcement.

By: Francis Lawrence

Date: June 22, 2020

Dance has allowed me to travel the world and live in three magical cities. Originally from Melbourne, Australia, I've danced with The Australian Ballet, Grand Rapids Ballet and Dance Theatre of Harlem, as well as the North American tour of Christopher Wheeldon's An American In Paris. Now I am a freelance artist based in New York City. But my travels have also opened my eyes to the work we still have to accomplish when it comes to the culture of racism. As recent events unfold in the news, the horrific images and stories of suffering have brought back memories of my own experience. During my career, I have had several encounters with police officers that have had a profound impact on me, the way I view the world and the concept of "white privilege."

Incident 1 (Melbourne, Australia)

I was 17 and on holiday in the Gold Coast (think the Florida of Australia). After a night out, I was on my way home and couldn't find a bathroom—a situation familiar to many of us. I decided to slip discreetly down an alleyway when two police officers saw me and followed me. As they approached, they told me they would arrest me unless I took my shirt off and wiped up my urine with it. "Wipe it harder," they instructed me. They laughed as they told me to put my urine soaked shirt back on. I felt degraded—their intent was to humiliate me rather than to serve and protect.

Incident 2 (Grand Rapids, Michigan)

I was driving through an affluent neighborhood after visiting a friend that lived there. Shortly after pulling out of the driveway, a cop stopped me. He asked me what I was doing in the area. I explained I was just visiting a friend but he was unconvinced. After 10 minutes of harsh questioning, I showed him my friend's text, which finally convinced him to let me go. He stopped and questioned me because he felt that I looked like I didn't belong.

Incident 3 (Grand Rapids, Michigan)

The police stopped me another time because a tail light was out on my car. I had no idea. I apologized and told them I would get it fixed immediately. I thought at worst I would receive a fine, but they proceeded to check my car from top to bottom—from my trunk to the glove compartment. After finding nothing, they then deemed my car "unroadworthy."

Incident 4 (Grand Rapids, Michigan)

I was walking towards my car from a local bar when two police officers stopped me. They asked me to put my hands in the air, shoved me against the wall and proceeded to check all my pockets. In my right one they found my fish oil, turmeric and glucosamine vitamins wrapped in a paper towel—I had forgotten to take them at dinner. One of the officers confiscated them thinking they were drugs. I asked the other if I could drop my hands as his partner went to evaluate the pills and he replied with a stern "NO." He told me there would be dire consequences if I even moved a finger. I remember looking around the quiet street thinking that if something happened to me, I would just become another statistic.

It started to rain. For over 20 minutes I stood with my arms above my head as the officer continuously berated me. After his partner returned and confirmed my vitamins were not drugs, they let me go. I didn't realize how much this incident scarred me until I bumped into one of the officers months later as I was picking up takeout. He did not recognize me, but I shook as I paid, remembering his aggression and how threatened I felt that night.

Incident 5 (Driving from New York to Connecticut)

Last year I rented a luxury car and drove to a wedding three hours away. I was in the left lane when a car suddenly sped up behind me. I moved over to the right to let him pass. I noticed a police cruiser a few cars behind me mirror my move. Fifteen minutes later he pulled me over. He let me know that I was driving five miles per hour over the speed limit but that I wasn't getting a fine. I continued my drive until a second police car started following me. He was noticeably on my tail, as if he was waiting for me to make the wrong move. I continued very cautiously and after 15 minutes he eventually left me alone. Shortly afterwards, a third cop pulled me over. I asked why and he told me that he needed to run my license and give me a breathalyzer test. He accused me of swerving when I was not. These stops added an additional 45 minutes to my trip, and I almost missed seeing my friend walk down the aisle. Did they suspect me of stealing the car? I now think twice about renting a car on the nicer side.

As an artist, I try to portray strength, grace and power in everything I dance. Offstage my experiences with police have left me feeling diminished. I share these stories not for pity, but to create awareness. Globally, there is an appetite for change and now is the time to learn, listen and grow. And while many of the conversations we're having right now may be uncomfortable, it is much more uncomfortable to experience racism. Despite this, I have heard indignation from some in the white community who have felt that they themselves have made no contributions to racism and that our stories are gross generalizations. This comes from their white privilege.

White privilege is getting to drive in a rich area without worrying about getting stopped by the police

White privilege is not feeling anxious that your car might get ransacked because your taillight is out and the police think you might have drugs.

White privilege is knowing that the police are more likely to give you the benefit of the doubt when you say the vitamins in your pocket are not drugs

White privilege is not leaving an hour early for a trip, or renting a car of lesser value, because you're likely to get stopped numerous times.

I would like to leave you with one last story from a recent tour this past December. I was in Central Pennsylvania having dinner after the last dress rehearsal of Nutcracker with the director and his crew. A drunk white man across the other side of the bar thought we were laughing at him (we weren't) and singled me out. He threatened to kill me, and even walked to his car to get his gun. I was the only person of color in the bar and this clearly bothered him. Luckily he decided to drive off, and I felt a sense of relief when I realized everyone in the bar was on my side. The next day, as I danced my way through opening night, I wondered if the audience knew their Prince Cavalier's life was threatened the night before and that he was a regular target of law enforcement.

There are many more with stories like mine. But by listening to them, and learning how systems have failed those affected by racism, we can effectively fight for change.

#francis lawrence #ballet #ballerino #article #pointe magazine #pointemagazineofficial #anti black racism /#racism /#harassment /#police brutality /#abuse /#police /

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ginny-rose-sixx · 4 years ago

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What the Fork? Ch 1

Story Summary:

Eva Rozlyn "Roz" Roberts accidentally time travels when she fiddles with her time turner while watching The Dirt. She ends up in 1981 in the Mötley apartment. How will the Crüe react? Will she ever be able to get back to 2020? Will Roz be able to handle their way of life? Will she ever be able to control the time travel?

A/N:

I decided to start putting my story ‘What the Fork’ on Tumblr in addition to AO3 and WattPad (11 chapters). I wanted to organize my writing some more. Since I plan on this being a very long book and I want to make it a series, I want to take notes on my chapters so that I avoid continuity errors. Also, if I find any grammatical errors that I missed I will fix those. With the notes and everything, I thought that I would start putting this up here as well. As time goes on, I may do alternate takes on chapters and stuff like that.

Oh, and the title is a bit of a funny story. When I first was trying to come up with a title, I asked for my boyfriend’s help. I told him the premise of the story and a summary of the first chapter. The first words out of his name were, “What the fuck???” And I was like, “Ok, there we go.” Of course, I wasn’t gonna swear in the title even though I do in the story. So, I decided to make a reference to the tv show ‘The Good Place’.

Pairing: Not disclosed to reader yet

Warnings: swearing

Word count: 1886

Chapter One

Eva Rozlyn Roberts, aka Roz, was sick of waiting for her friend to pick her up. She was supposed to be going to her first ever convention. She was dressed as a Gryffindor witch. She started to fiddle with parts of her costume. First, she was twirling her Newt Scamander replica wand for a while. *Why on Earth am I still waiting for her?* Roz wondered. Roz put her wand up her sleeve, and she tried calling her friend Katy for what felt like the 100th time that day.

After the voicemail picked up again, Roz decided to start watching The Dirt again. She had lost track of how many times she had watched the movie and listened to the songs since the movie came out. As she watched the movie, she took out a time turner necklace and started twirling it in all of the different directions. *I wish I had never agreed to go with Katy. She always forgets about me or bails.* She dropped the necklace and started to braid her hair.

About an hour into the movie, Roz had already braided her hair so that it hung over her left shoulder. Her hair was black and it had deep red highlights all throughout. When she started twirling her time turner necklace again, a faint blue tendril of light started twisting around her fingers and slowly working its way up her arms. Before she even noticed it, the light was covering the entirety of her forearms. She immediately stopped playing with the time turner and started to panic. *Time turners are NOT even real! I cannot deal with this. I just turned 19 and I have to move soon. Fuck! What’s gonna happen to Hope?* The blue light had engulfed her and no matter how hard she tried; she couldn't get the time turner out of her hands. The last thought she had before she blacked out was *I hope she’s safe and that I’m at least gonna go somewhere fun.....*

*******************

The guys had just finished agreeing on a name. Mötley Crüe was finally a reality. They kept drinking together and didn't pay any attention to the strange blue light emanating from under the table. After a few hours, Tommy exclaimed, "Dudes, the only thing that could make this better would be for a chick to be here!"

After a pull from his beer Vince laughed and asked, "Where exactly do you expect a chick to come from?"

Mick growled sarcastically, "In a ball of light ya dumbass."

Tommy's eyes lit up with teenage enthusiasm. "Ya really think so Mick?"

Nikki just laughed and said, "He was joking dork."

By then the light had waned and then, all of a sudden, it flashed back out from under the table. It engulfed the Crüe and Vince screamed. Once the light was gone Mick was shocked. "Seriously, I was joking about the light. What the fuck's going on under the table?"

Tommy ducked his head under the table and immediately popped his head back up. "Dudes, I can't believe it. I think I drank too much! There's a fuckin chick under the table!"

Nikki cackled "T-bone quit fuckin around! Is there even anything other than trash under there?"

Tommy glared and pouted "I'm not joking. Just look for yourself dude!"

Mick grunted in pain as he got down on the floor and saw the strangest thing. There was girl who was maybe in her older teens. Her sudden appearance wasn't the only strange thing. She had unnatural black and red hair that was braided. She was also in what looked to be a school uniform. She had a red and black plaid skirt, knee high socks, odd combat like boots, a black blouse, a dark grey cardigan with a lion crest on it, and oddest of all a cloak. Mick decided that they needed to at least get her out from under the table. Maybe wake her if possible. "Nikki stop your cackling and help me move her to the couch."

"Fine, fine" Nikki said as he rolled his eyes.

Tommy and Vince moved the table and Mick carefully lifted her head and shoulders with a grimace while Nikki got her legs. Once they got her on the couch, Vince decided to bail to his girlfriend’s place, "Sorry, but I'm not sober enough for this shit. I'll be back later."

Tommy leaned over the girl and asked, "Where do you guys think she came from?"

Nikki shrugged, "Fuck if I know. Wake her up and see."

Tommy started to poke her in the cheek. She mumbled "...5 mur min mum..." Tommy giggled and then decided to poke her sharply in the side. The girl's emerald eyes flew open as she shot into a sitting position.

She screamed and flailed her arms which resulted in smacking Tommy in the face. "What the fork? Son of a bitch! What kind of asshole jabs someone they don't know in the side? Seriously, what the fuck?!"

The guys looked at her with wide eyes and then at each other. "Well Mick you're the one who said a chick would come from a ball of light. What do you think we should do with her?" Nikki asked.

Mick chuckled "Your apartment, you guys figure it out. I'm gonna just drink more."

Sitting up fully and looking around the room, the girl was disoriented. "She's right here and she even has a name! She also wants to know who you guys are and where she is," she snapped at them.

Tommy sat next to her on the couch and responded, "Well I'm Tommy, that's Nikki and that's Mick. You are in our apartment."

"Well theirs" Mick said pointing between Tommy and Nikki with his bottle of Jack.

"Now your turn" Nikki said pointedly to her.

Roz nervously tucked her legs under herself and hugged her knees. Looking down at the floor Roz said, "I'm Roz, that's all you're going to get from me right now. I want to know what city I'm in and what year it is. I've learned from books, TV, and movies that fresh out of a ball of light you figure out where and when you are."

Tommy's brow knitted and he said, "Um its 1981 and you're in Los Angeles. Uh I guess that means I should ask you; where and when are you from Roz?"

She looked with wide eyes between Mick and Nikki before settling back on Tommy. "Please don't freak out," she said quietly. As she looked down at her boots, she mumbled, "I'm from Madison, WI, and I was in the year 2020. I was born July 1, 2001 so I turned 19 a week ago in my time.”

Nikki snorted, and Tommy elbowed him before he interrupted, “Seriously dude?? You’re from the future AND from Wisconsin?? How the fuck did you get here? Also, why under the table?”

“I have no clue Tommy, I was just messing around with my necklace and then POOF………” Roz trailed off and then stared wide-eyed at Mick, Tommy, and then fixed her eyes on Nikki. She had finally realized who she was with. “Holy fucking shit balls!!!!!! M-Mick Mars? T-Tommy Lee? …. A-a-an-and N-ni-Nikki S-ss-Sixx?” She continued stare at Nikki who, after a bit, narrowed his eyes at her before turning to Mick and Tommy.

“How the hell does she know who we are?” Nikki wondered.

Mick shrugged and Tommy laughed and said, “Wait dude, she’s from the future, right? We’re probably famous. Hey Roz is that how you know us?”

“Shit, I shouldn’t have let that bit slip. This better not fuck up the space time continuum. I refuse to tell you guys about your futures.” She said wildly staring at Tommy.

“Ok… ok… What should we do with her until we figure out if she can even go home?” Tommy asked turning to Nikki.

“Well we can claim she is related to one of us,” suggested Nikki. “Hey Mick want a sister or a cousin?”

Mick shook his head and chuckled slightly. “If she’s gonna be my cousin I wanna know her whole name. So, lady teen, what’s your name?”

“Seriously Mick? Lady teen? Ugh fine, my name is Eva Rozlyn Roberts. I prefer Roz though.” She looked between the guys and then around the disgusting living room. “So… um…. Where am I going to live? If I recall this place only has the 2 rooms and Vince and Tommy already share one of them.” She thought for a moment, *Honestly, I hope they say I have to share with Vince and Tommy. Sharing with Nikki would be nerve wracking.*

“Seriously dude, it’s creepy how much you know about us. You can share the room with me and Vince. I know Nikki ain’t gonna wanna share.” Tommy said looking like a hopeful puppy.

“I guess that works. I’m gonna need something other than my costume to wear guys. I can’t always walk around LA dressed as a character from Harry Potter.” Roz said.

“Wait who’s this Harry guy?” Nikki asked frowning.

Roz giggled, “He’s the main character from a series of books that started in the late 90’s. He is a wizard and goes to a magical boarding school. It’s my favorite series of books ever. Right now, I’m wearing the Gryffindor version of the Hogwarts uniform. I also have a time turner necklace and a replica of Newt Scamander’s wand.”

Mick rolled his eyes, “ So let me get this straight. You just decided to dress like a wizarding school girl and then play with magical objects?”

Roz’s face clouded over, “Well I was supposed to be going to a convention with my friend Katy. Bitch never actually picked me up. I was fiddling around with the time turner necklace while watching a movie. Then I was in a blue light and passed out. Seriously, magic isn’t real. At least it wasn’t until the time turner decided to spaz out and actually work.”

Nikki smirked and asked, “Are you sure you’re not a witch? You’re already a time traveler. Why not be a witch too?”

“Bro do you really think she’s a witch? That would be so cool!!!” Tommy turned to Roz and asked, “Do you think that your wand will work too?”

Roz giggled, “That would be amazing, although I doubt it does. But damn is it getting late or what? Any chance we can go back over this after some sleep?”

“Well Tommy show her to Vince’s bed. I think it would be hilarious if Vin came back while she was sleeping in his bed.” Nikki says lighting up a cigarette.

Tommy turned to Roz, “I should have some sweatpants and a shirt for you to wear.”

“Tommy I hope you’ve got some workout shorts because your legs are way to long,” Roz said as she followed Tommy. Tommy handed her some shorts and a t-shirt and pointed out Vince’s bed. “Thanks Tommy.”

After Tommy left the room Roz shut the door and changed. She folded her clothes and stuffed them in the pillowcase, and she still wore the time turner and kept the wand in its sheath on her forearm. She laid down and her last thought before sleep claimed her was of how strange this all is.

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marias-studyblr · 6 years ago

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Hello I'm sorry to ask that but how did you do to lose weight ? I've been feeling really down lately bc of my weight but also my body in general. I'm not in a "bad" health, like my weight is what we call "normal" but I'm not comfortable with it.. as my mood is bad I don't have motivation and that sucks... so if you could give me advices it would be really nice 😘 thanks a lot

Hello and I’m the one who’s so so so sorry for the delay on this answer! I hope you still read it and it’s worth the wait/read ❤️

I’m not a nutritionist or a doctor, so all the advice I’m going to give you is born from experience of literal years of trying and trying to lose weight non stop. :)

This is indeed a studyblr account. But this issue is too important and close to my heart to not discuss, and also this health issue of mine has impacted my grades and my school life. Not to mention the damage to my overall happiness and self-confidence, as you explained in your question.

If this was a simple how do you lose weight question I would say it’s simple, because everyone knows it - eat better and exercise frequently. However, this feels to me like a confidence/body issues question, and I’m going to be very thorough about it because it gets a lot more complex when you’re uncomfortable with your body.

I think it’s important to answer this question well and I’m going to do my best. this is gonna be >>>

🌼 I N T R O

I completely understand the feeling of being uncomfortable with your body. The feeling of being comfortable with yourself is more complicated and worrisome than it may appear on a superficial level.

I didn’t grow up feeling comfortable with my body, I remember since 5th grade having my family, my swimming lesson’s teacher, classmates telling me my belly was big and “I looked like I was pregnant”. Without realizing, I became really uncomfortable with that area of my body,

and now, I consider it a beautiful strong part of my body, I don’t worry about sucking it in or hiding it and I don’t even mind when people touch it (idk if it makes sense but I hated it when people touched my belly and I tried to not breathe into my belly or make it bigger in any way). And I can really say this and mean it, which once I thought would be impossible.

🌼 I’ M T H E O N E I S H O U L D L O V E

If we want to change for the better the way we feel - being at ease, in peace - we have to be the cause for that change. Nobody else. Not your crush, not your neighbor, not your parent.

The reason why I’m gaining health in a sustainable way is that in the core of all that is the work I did for my mental health that leaked into all areas of my life, including physical health and losing my unhealthy weight.

I had to go through a massive change of mindset and a bunch of realizations to start taking care of myself properly.

It’s so important to take care of yourself like you actually love yourself, like you actually matter, like you aren’t just a flop of meat hanging around just serving other people’s needs, dressing up for others, saying things to please others.

Breathing like you love yourself, walking, talking, working, eating, moving, exercising like you love yourself. Doing things for no other reason than to tend to your needs, while still maintaining a respect for others and for yourself. That feeling leaks to every single part of your life. And it makes everything start flourishing.

I worked and still work to have that feeling in a more persistent way but I remember when I realized I truly actually felt it in my bones and was starting to act accordingly, not too long ago, tears came to my eyes. I know it comes natural to many, but to me, it was never like that. And it’s so much easier to lose weight when you tend to that.

My first intuition is to serve others. I thought everyone was so much better than me when I was younger, I thought everyone was so cool, except for me. And it feels so great to know that we are all the same. No one is better or worse. No one has the right to belittle me. We are living lives in our own particular way and it’s ok to just… exist and be friends with people and not worry about pleasing everyone, and truly accepting your body figure how it is right now, and trust that you’ll get there somehow by building healthier, more productive habits in time.

Being more confident with the way you look and carrying yourself with grace is such a good feeling. And I want everyone to have that feeling, I want everyone to be healthy and strong. Because that feeling does impact your life in a positive way, even if it’s step by step. One step in the right direction at a time is exactly what we are looking for.

🌼 R E S T R I C T I V E D I E T S

I’ve seen nutritionists give good advice and bad advice on losing weight to people who are self aware/conscious about their body. The bad advice I’ve seen is at the gyms my mom or my mom’s friends have stayed at. If people follow that 6 week restrictive diet plan, obviously they are going to lose weight… but at what cost? and to gain it all back again after? in my knowledge, most people don’t follow it, while paying for the consults and feeling guilty about the whole thing. It’s such an unhealthy experience in my point of view and if you’re trying to lose weight, it’s not something I recommend.

I love donuts and chocolate a lot for example, and I eat them and have eaten them while losing weight consistently. They are not some kind of poison you are guilty of enjoying once in a while. You are not different than any other healthy person. What I’ve figured out is that healthy people enjoy them too, but they just know how to do it.

It’s all about the quantity and eating smartly. You can still enjoy your favorite foods but in small quantities. I normally eat sweets after lunch and dinner, not between or at breakfast. For many reasons, but one of them is that way the small portions really satisfy me. I used to eat a lot of food but now I’m very mindful about the portions. If you could get one thing out of this answer is that PORTIONS ARE IMPORTANT. When I continue eating after I’m satisfied, it’s normally because I put a lot in my plate and I don’t want the food to go to waste. so now I pay mindful attention to that. And it has changed my life!!!1!1

anyways, I know those meal plans way too well, it’s all I heard when I was younger when I googled ‘weight loss tips’… i lost maximum 2 kgs in one and just gained it all back and more after giving up in the middle of it. And the reason why is not because I was weak or undisciplined, it’s because I couldn’t build habits with that kind of intention.

Also I hated to go out/my plans changed but I wouldn’t be able to eat anything because it wouldn’t be on my meal plan. I needed to build discipline to build habits and an intuition to know when I was full, not follow a stupid paper that doesn’t know anything about my body’s needs. We have to be able to act accordingly to our needs, not in fear of gaining weight.

My intention was just to lose some weight to look as skinny as someone else or to look good for other people :(dark thoughts… i know) and also as fast as possible. My intention was never health.

I still had to go through a lot of learning years to really get my intention right so then I could start building the habits that would allow me to lose weight.

**Habits always prevails**

Focus on building slowly the habits that will allow you to live a healthy life FOREVER, not just a 6 week plan. Think about the habits that are realistic enough but healthy enough to implement. Long term results is what you are looking for, trust me. Even if it takes longer to accomplish the same weight when you’re not hungry all the time, it’s teaching you how to eat in a normal way, which for me was very important, coming from a weird past of restricting/binging.

🌼 T E N D E R I N G T O Y O U A S A W H O L E

The good advice I’ve heard from nutritionists includes a holistic approach.

Your whole body is interconnected. You can’t expect to change your weight as of right now in a sustained way without making serious changes to your mindset and lifestyle habits, because your weight is a reflection of your mindset and lifestyle habits, amongst other things.

Even though a 6-week plan might possibly give you a quick fix, it really doesn’t fix anything when you have body issues. Your mindset hasn’t changed, you still have the same habits. To me now it’s obvious why I experienced gain weight recurrences over and over again while following those stupid plans!

When you start considering your body as a whole, and not just the muscles, tendons and organs, but as a functional machine with needs and feelings, a lot of things start clicking and making sense.

Start thinking about the diet that allows your body to be given nutrients so your organs can function, a diet that gives your arteries a chance to breathe, an exercise routine that makes you feel good. Our intention should always be to make ourselves as healthy as possible. As strong, flexible, rich on the inside type of healthy. When we feel the healthiest, inside and out, we feel the happiest.

🌼 A B O U T L O O K I N G G O O D

I know to some it sounds superficial to worry about the way you look. It’s hard to grasp why we as human beings care so much about the concept of beauty. But it doesn’t have to be complicated. When I was still more unhealthy and unconfident, I felt it when I wore a new scarf, when my hair looked nice, when I had a cool pair of earrings… it can be from the smallest of things.

That feeling of confidence is not going to make you happy all of a sudden but I’m tired of hearing people underestimate the power boost and energy it can give you and downplaying it as superficial. I know there is a line where it crosses to vanity. But there is a middle ground between not taking care of yourself and vanity.

To a lot it comes naturally the process of hygiene, dressing your style, exercising, eating well. To others, it may not. I think confidence can be felt at any weight and appearance, but it’s a lot easier to feel confident when you know you are healthy and taking good care of yourself.

I’ve mentioned weight a lot, but know that health is always my number one priority and weight is just one tracker of your health. It’s an important tracker of your health, but it’s not decisive on whether you are healthy or not because it has to be very specific to your daily activities, your job, your height, your body type. And it’s not decisive on wether or not you should think as of yourself as good looking.

I think beauty and aesthetic, whatever that means to you, does play a role in our mental health. And I think only when we embrace that side of our human selves, without excess though, only then we can be truly confident and happy in our shoes.

🌼 W H E N Y O U F E E L B A D

You can’t shame yourself into a healthy mindset/healthy habits. *say it for the people in the back!!* It has to come from a place of connect, self-respect and trust. Or you’ll just guilt yourself into worse habits.

When you have a “bad” day or a “bad” week, take responsibility in order to move forward. Be mindful of feeling guilty or like you’ve “ruined something”. Taking responsibility is different from feeling guilty. One helps you grow consciously and be better in the future, and the other doesn’t.

Every single day, every single week will not be perfect, but don’t let that week turn your habits around. Once again: habit always prevails. I see my habits as the foundations of my healthy lifestyle, as the foundations of a house. Wind doesn’t tear them down, just like a more unhealthy week doesn’t tear them down.

The healthiest people I know don’t care when they have junk food for a meal, they just say “I’ll be more careful next week”. And they don’t even think twice about it. They move on. They accept it and move on.

If you practice it enough times, it becomes second nature.

🌼 B A L A N C E

I feel like when discussing the health of the body, one word that always comes up in mind is BALANCE.

Balancing out the body. I think we know what we need by intuition. We feel sick when we eat too much, we feel tired when we don’t eat enough. So a lot of my eating became guided by this inner intuition of what am I feeling. I’m always asking my body: “What do you need?”

Somedays I’m demotivated, tired, experiencing mood swings, I know I have to balance that negative energy with yoga, meditation, sleep, good food, hydration. I’m getting to know my body more and more as time goes by and a lot of my results come from that LISTENING. It’s listening yall!

And if sometimes you’re lost and you can’t figure out how to listen to what your body is saying, that’s what trackers are for. Do you need to insert a wider variety of nutrients in your diets? Do you need to improve your muscle mass? Are you underweight, are you overweight? What are the foods you eat the most and when are you eating? How many hours are you sleeping?

Don’t get overwhelmed with these questions though, they are useful to help you understand some feelings that you’re experiencing and help you get in the right direction, however, with practice, it becomes second nature to listen.

🌼 D I S C I P L I N E

Another thing I would like to talk about is the role of discipline in a healthy body.

I think the word self-discipline in the diet or exercise context has a very bad connotation, like it’s a bad thing to be disciplined in your meals, or it’s a bad thing to be disciplined in your exercise regimen, because that means you will never eat ice cream again, you’ll always eat the same old boring things.

I know where that concept comes from, I’ve thought that myself, and I understand it. However, as of now, I see being disciplined around your eating habits as something very very good. It’s what has given me a lot of results, and it’s really simple, it’s setting a bunch of rules for yourself and following them. I’ve written more about self discipline, but in the case of eating, it depends on person to person.

There are things that I’m more flexible about and then things I’m really disciplined about. For example, I eat 3 times a day and at specific time stamps, and I’m strict about that. And what I mean by that is everyone has a different version when it comes to what, when and how they enjoy eating.

Discipline is not a bad thing because you can choose the things you want to be disciplined about. I enjoy donuts and chocolate.. so I eat them. I’m full after my meals so I’m disciplined to not eat until my next meal. I exercise everyday. Stuff like that. You get to choose what life you want to live through discipline and really think about your future.

🌼 M Y R U L E S

If you wanted me to say more specific things, like how much I eat in a day, or long I exercise for, I don’t believe those are actually important, because like I’ve said they are personal to each individual and each different needs and lifestyles, so I’ll just say my general guidelines:

walk everywhere. Walking is the most natural exercise and our body loves it a lot. it is highly beneficial.

eat my daily servings of beans, vegetables, fruits, flaxseeds, nuts, whole grains. Start looking at food for more than just taste.

Do yoga once a day.

be specific about your prefered meal times and stick with them. I enjoy eating breakfast, lunch and dinner. I drink water or tea in between but I don’t even think about eating between my meals because I’m so used to eating my meals at specific times. that helps a lot!

during your meals, eat until your satisfied! Don’t leave the table feeling hungry OR too full. Feel happy about eating your meal and appreciate the food in the table. It’s something precious and to cherish.

do other exercise frequently to build muscle and strength, so you can hold and carry yourself even when you get older.

🌼 F I N A L C O N S I D E R A T I O N S

What I tried to explain is hard to put into words. It reminds me of all the moments I hid in the bathroom during PE, cried because of my appearance at night, was humiliated by insensitive people. And how getting through these memories and feelings can’t really be put into words because each person has to look inwards and find that in themselves.

Losing weight is not difficult for a lot of people but for me it always had other meaning behind it.

These moments can and will be replaced by self-confidence and good mental health in the present and future if you keep working on what is actually important - your health, your mental state, and your opinion about yourself. NOT pleasing others. NOT looking good in the mirror. NOT being at a certain number.

It has to come from a good place inside you if you want it to stay for good and actually make a good impact in your life.

It is a slow progress, but remember it’s NOT just to look good, it’s to live a happier life and your preferred lifestyle.

So answering your question: I lost weight by being conscious of my health. I was conscious that I was not healthy at that way, I was not strong, flexible, fast, at least not how I know I could be. I lost weight by striving to find balance, by listening to my body’s needs, by being disciplined on what I gave my stomach to digest, by stimulating my muscles and organs, and always keeping my own happiness as the end goal.

Because I’ve been doing it for a while now, it has become really simple and I eat healthier when I don’t overthink it. Don’t overthink it too much. It’s good to be mindful about it, but I feel better when it’s not constantly in my mind to the point it’s worrying me.

If you were looking for a quick easy way, this is not it my dear dear friend. the truth is you’ll need to work hard on yourself. However, just because it’s a long process, it doesn’t make it difficult. It’s fun to be healthy! It’s fun to exercise and do yoga. It’s fun to eat healthy and normal! We can all do it. You can do it. I can do it.

🌼 A R E C O M M E N D A T I O N

I always make this recommendation but let me do it again. One of the people who made a huge impact on my mental health and was a huge positive influence in my life was Adriene Mishler from Yoga with Adriene. I can’t even remember when I discovered her or how. I did her videos first on an off, and then things started getting more serious and now I’m literally practicing every single day with her for the past few months and I don’t ever want to stop. More than being a really beneficial physical practice for your internal organs, for your muscles and tissue, it’s a daily practice for my energy and happiness. It makes you reflect on the way you think about yourself and take care of yourself. When I’m frustrated I cry and find peace, when I’m happy I get even happier, when I’m busy and nervous, I find my cool and calm.

Her videos are the perfect accomplishment of body and mind connection and have helped me so much. So if you’re not already practicing with her, whenever you can, try one of her videos, 30 minutes go by so fast. She has practices for anxiety, stress melt, text neck, self-doubt, centering, finding stability, connection, creativity, for the future…all free in her yt channel. The more you practice, the more you’ll see real-life results and an energy and mindset that transfers to outside the mat. I really recommend it okay? okay.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. :)) I hope this helped in any way, please never feel embarrassed to send me questions about mental health/physical health. anything that I can help with, I will help and be open about!

as you can see I could write to you for 10 million light years and I would still worry about not getting my point across. okay now I’m really gonna go, sending lots of love to you 💕💕💕 I love you, stay well!

#answered

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hangonimevolving · 4 years ago

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The Iron String.

“Trust thyself: every heart vibrates to that iron string.”

--Ralph Waldo Emerson, Self Reliance

Here we are. It's August. Five months plus since the start of the U.S. pandemic, lockdowns, and general disruption to society. Over 5.26 million confirmed cases in the United States alone to date, and 167,000 deaths. Our world around us has changed.

Much of the last two months of summer for me were spent in an agonizing holding pattern concerning the almighty School Question. What would happen in the fall? Would schools be reopening? If so, how would that look - would we just act like life is normal, or would there be modifications to help prevent transmission of the virus? If so, what on earth modifications are even possible for young children that are reasonable, and to which little kids can even feasibly adhere given their ages and needs? If it proves too difficult to reopen schools, what would be the plan? Would there be some sort of virtual learning program, and how would it differ from the shifts that happened this past spring, with teachers scrambling to educate themselves on distance-learning technologies and teleconferencing utilities in order to teach a room full of kindergartners on Zoom? Surely, with several months to ponder the possibilities and plan for vairous contingencies, schools would be more prepared with better, more structured and thought-out plans for fall, than what they had in the spring... right?

Er, wrong. WRONG. The short version of how this situation ended, at least in our geographic area, is that the public school system (and my own kids' small, family-owned private school) made the decision to reopen to face-to-face teaching by the middle of July. Late in the game, both also hastily threw together a virtual option for students - but the virtual option was tantamount to a continuation of the fly-by-night Zoom teaching that had been put into effect at the very start of the lockdown.

I for one was entirely disappointed and disgusted with this. With SO much time to plan, this is really the best that could be done?! Bruh, NAW. I wasn't having it.

So blah blah blah, hem, haw, blah. Research, research, research. Reading, millions of review websites, forums, blogs, legal defense funds, Department of Education website, nonprofits, clubs and associations and collectives.... a phone call with an old friend from high school with over 10+ years experience, and a series of long and informative text message exchanges with two other friends, one a veteran with over 15+ years with three now-adult children, another a mom about my age of children about my kids' ages, facing this situation just like me and working through options just like me...... and, after all this, I knew exactly what I would be doing. What WE would be doing, in our family.

By June 13, it was official, and it was all systems go.

Ladies and gentlemen.... I am officially a homeschooling mom. Like, a LEGIT homeschooling mom. As in, I am doing a 100% parent-led homeschooling curriculum plan, FULL-time, with my two children.

I won't lie. In a million, bajillion, baskillion years, I don't think I ever intended to find myself in this place. I'll also say with honesty, that I have admired from afar the rare few homeschooling families that I somewhat know, and the flexibility and creativity with which they approach academics and learning in general.

I have also been increasingly dissatisfied and frustrated with the academic progress of my own children... Dr. Spouse and I have had long discussions where we've tried to speculate on the things that we haven't been satisfied about in our kids' schooling. The list has been long. But even as we were able to identify specific shortcomings in our children's particular educational environment, I've felt a rising sensation of control-freakism and bootstrapism in my chest, that has whispered to my conscience: "if you feel something is wrong here, don't sit around waiting for someone else to fix it. And, when you articulate your concerns in a constructive, non-threatening, but clear way, and people have smiled and nodded and claimed they'd follow up on those items, but in the end, they havent taken those concerns seriously - then it is time to man the f&* up and TAKE CARE OF THAT SHIT yourself. Because YOU are the only one you can trust. YOU are the only one who can do it right, in your own view. So either do it, or stop feeling dissatisfied about it."

So here it is. Our original plan, prior to the pandemic, was to switch the kids to the local (A-rated) public elementary school for this coming year. We had hoped that a change in environment, teachers, and the accountability of being a reputed school in the public school system, would mean more organization and oversight, and that hopefully this would translate into better academic progress in our kids.... but the pandemic changed all our plans, and besides, I don't know if more "in theory..." type things ever really translate to palpable, effective change at the individual level (at least not for me anyway, I never have such luck).

Rather than seeing this weird, surreal circumstance has having forced me into the homeschooling decision (which, maybe it sort of did) - - for reasons I can't explain, I dove headlong into it, with great excitement and hope. I can't really figure out how I have been as enthusiastic or jazzed about it as I have been - - but lookie, I'm jazzed! Seriously. From the moment we made the decision to do it, I felt like a 1,000-lb. weight was lifted from my chest. No more feeling anxious or on the edge of my seat about decisions that are being made outside of my control. In this matter - I stopped waiting for other poeple, and I TOOK CONTROL. For my own kids, anyway.

I'll write a detailed post at a later time about some of the particulars of the homeschooling plan that I am using, the research I did, the materials I ended up purchasing, the knowledge and insight I required while in the preparations phase, and other stuff. But, for now - I've droned on long enough. I'm gonna share some pictures now.

To bring it back to the start of this post - - with this homeschooling plan, I have found my iron string. I literally felt this resounding, reverberating sense of CONFIDENCE the moment that I decided to do this, and effectively brought Dr. Spouse on board. NEVER, in my life, have I felt so right about a decision. I feel a tremendous inner harmony about it - like I've come home to myself, if that's not too weird to say.

Sooo.... here are pictures of Week 1 of our great homeschooling adventure.

Obligatory "First Day of School" picture....

Our newly-tweaked home office - - now serving as our homeschooling classroom!

Particularly proud of our new training clock, our large-format calendar, and the "today's date/weather" board that I made with vinyl die-cuts from my Cricut, some chalkboard-surface Contact paper, and some rainbow sparkly duct tape :)

Spanish class: kids use a fun new app for two class sessions a week

Dey working on simple addition/subtraction with Teddy Bear Counters

Dey slaying his worksheets in Handwriting class - we're doing both print letters and cursive

Vev learning to tell time, and to recognize and convey the time in both analog and digital notation

After reading several history textbook chapters on the origins, diets, nomadic lifestyles, housing practices, and modes of dress among prehistoric humankind - we did a "History in action" lesson where the kids were given 10 minutes to construct a shelter out of a "mammoth skin" (blanket), "two tree branches" (pool noodles), and several large "rocks" (throw pillows). They didn't need the full 10 minutes :)

Vev enjoying one of his first chapter books - an "I Can Read" reader during a Language Arts learning block

After a week reading science textbook chapters about the earth's atmosphere, we conducted science experiments to better understand the properties of air! The boys had a "paper race" using construction paper and pieces of cardboard as fans, to race two paper structures across a finish line. They discussed their expectations and each articulated a hypothesis about which paper would travel faster, prior to conducting the experiment; afterwards, we determined whether our "guesses" (hypothesis) were accepted or rejected :)

This is just a smattering. There's been so much, and in only four days. I can't believe how much we are able to learn and cover in our homeschooling time. And the crazy thing is, we are able to do Phonics and Grammar, Reading, History, Read-aloud time, Math, Spanish, Handwriting, and Science in only about 3 hours per day. We integrate things like art, movement, current events, and practical life skills into pretty much everything we do, but on occasion we are even able to do a discrete, planned-out period of time for these topics too.

The iron string is taut, and secured in its proper place. We are ready for it to guide us through this school year.

#homeschooling #Vev #Dey #quarantinelife

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365dniprivate · 4 years ago

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Chapter 4

Giardini Naxos - the town where Martin and I had arrived a few days ago, lay several kilometers from Taormina and was visible from virtually everywhere in the city. It dawned on me that this city had previously been one of our sightseeing destinations, which is why it'd felt so familiar. What if we came across Martin, Michał or Karolina? Would any of them try to step in and rescue me? I fidgeted restlessly in my seat while considering this thought.

"They left the island yesterday," he said, as if reading my mind. How did he know what I was thinking about? I stared at him with a puzzled look, but he didn't seem to notice.9

When we arrived, the sun was slowly setting on the streets of Taormina. The city was teeming with life; hundreds of tourists and residents, tempted by numerous cafes and restaurants, filled the narrow, picturesque roads. I smiled when I began to notice signs pointing to all kinds of luxury boutiques. These stores were a common sight in Warsaw, but in a place that was practically at the end of the world, they were completely unexpected.

The car stopped, and the driver got out to open the door for us. Massimo offered me his hand to help me exit the large SUV. Another car pulled up next to us, from which stepped out two men dressed in black suits - Massimo's protection. He led me down one of the main roads, his men following behind at a close distance so as not to draw attention to themselves. If their goal was to blend in, a better outfit would've been shorts and flip-flops, though I supposed it would've been difficult to hide a weapon in beach clothes.

The first store we visited was the Roberto Cavalli boutique. We'd no sooner stepped through the door when a saleswoman rushed to us, warmly welcoming my companion, then me. An older man, dressed quite fashionably, came out of the back room and greeted Massimo in Italian with two kisses on the cheeks, then turned toward me.

"Bella," he said, holding my hands; it was one of the few words in Italian that I understood. I smiled warmly at him, in thanks for his compliment.

"My name is Antonio, and I'll be helping you select the perfect wardrobe," he began in fluent English. He studied me for a bit, then stated matter-of-factly, "Size 36, yes? Maybe even 34, depending on bra size."

"As you can see, nature hasn't endowed me well," I said, pointing with laughter to my breasts.

"Oh, my love!" Antonio exclaimed. "Roberto Cavalli loves such shapes! Let us go and give Don Massimo a chance to rest."

Massimo sat down on a couch made of luxurious silver material. A cold bottle of Dom Pérignon was waiting beside him, and one of the grateful saleswomen filled a glass for him. Massimo gave me a lustful look, then opened a newspaper and started to read.

Antonio, whistling contentedly, brought dozens of dresses to the fitting room, flying past me while carrying garments of incredible value. You could easily purchase an apartment in Warsaw with how much these all cost, I thought. After trying on clothes for a little over an hour, I settled on a few different outfits that were packed away for us in decorative boxes.

The situation was similar in the other stores we stopped at - an excited, over the top welcome and endless shopping. Prada, Louis Vuitton, Chanel, Louboutin; each time, Massimo would sit down and flip through his newspaper, talk on his phone or check something on his iPad. He didn't seem to be interested in what I was doing at all, which on the one hand felt like a nice reprieve, but on the other hand annoyed me greatly.

I couldn't figure him out; this morning it'd been nearly impossible for him to tear himself away from me, and now that he had the opportunity to see me in all of these beautiful clothes, he wanted nothing to do with me. Is this how Julia Roberts felt in Pretty Woman?

Victoria's Secret, which was our final destination, greeted us with a barrage of pink. The color was everywhere - on the walls, on the couches, on the saleswomen; it made me feel like I'd fallen into a cotton candy machine.2

Massimo looked at me while pulling the phone away from his ear. "This will be our last stop for today; we're almost out of time. Keep that in mind while shopping," he said casually, then turned away, sat down in a nearby chair and resumed his conversation. I stood there and looked at him disapprovingly - not because the shopping spree was over, as I'd had enough, but because of the way he'd treated me.

"Signora," the saleswoman called to me. She invited me into the fitting room with a friendly gesture. The first thing I noticed as I walked in was the sheer number of bathing suits, lingerie sets, and pairs of underwear that'd already been set aside for me, with the mountain of colorful fabrics - mainly lace - fully covering one of the chairs.

"You don't need to try on everything, just one or two sets so I can be sure that the size I've chosen for you is correct," she said and disappeared, sliding the heavy pink curtain behind her. What are all these panties for? I haven't owned this many pairs in my entire life, I thought.

I leaned out from behind the curtain and asked the saleswoman, "Who chose all these?"

She jumped to her feet and stepped closer. "Don Massimo asked that we prepare these items from our catalogue specifically for you."

"I understand," I said, hiding back behind the curtain. I began to notice a distinct pattern while rummaging through the pile: lace, lace, and more lace, with one or two cotton pieces thrown in. How incredibly comfortable, I grunted ironically.1

I chose to try on the combined silk and red lace set, and slowly took off my dress. The delicate bra fit perfectly on my small breasts, and I was thrilled to find out that, although it wasn't a push-up bra, it made my bust look very tempting. I bent down and dragged the lace thong over my legs. When I straightened up to look in the mirror, I saw Massimo standing behind me. He was leaning against the fitting room wall with his hands in his pockets, eyeing me up and down.

I turned and glared at him. "What are you..." was all I managed to say before he grabbed my neck and pressed my back to the mirror. He clung to me with his whole body, gently running his thumb over my lips. I tensed up, his body blocking my every move. He stopped playing with my mouth and stretched his arm around my neck. The embrace wasn't strong, and it didn't have to be; he just needed to assert his dominance.

"Don't move," he said, piercing right through me with his wild eyes. He looked down and groaned softly. "You look nice," he hissed through his teeth, "But you can't wear this - not yet."

The words "you can't" were spoken by him with encouragement, almost as if it was an order for me to do the exact opposite. I moved my bottom away from the cold mirror and slowly took a step forward. Massimo didn't object, moving backward with the same rhythm and speed as I was moving forward, keeping his hand clamped on my neck the entire time.

When I was far enough from the mirror that he could see me completely, I noticed that his gaze was fixed on my reflection, as if watching his prey. He was breathing loudly, his chest rising more rapidly, his pants growing too tight.

"Massimo," I said softly. He turned his gaze away from my ass and looked into my eyes. "Leave the fitting room, or I guarantee this will be the first and last time you see me like this."

He smiled, treating what I'd said as a challenge. His hand tightened around my neck, and his eyes burned with a combination of rage and desire. He took a step forward, then another, and stuck my body against the cold mirror again, releasing my neck.

"I chose all of this for you, and I'll decide when I see it," he said calmly, then turned and left. I stood there for a moment, feeling enraged and overjoyed at the same time; I was starting to understand the rules of his game, and starting to learn my opponent's weak spots.

As I was putting my dress back on, I felt my anger consuming me. I grabbed the pile that was sitting on the chair and barged out of the fitting room. The saleswoman jumped up, but I stormed past her to find Massimo sitting on the couch again. I went and threw everything I was carrying in my hands at him.

"Here - you chose all this, so have it!" I screamed, and ran out of the store. The security detail that'd been waiting outside the boutique cared little as I passed them; they simply looked back to check on Massimo, then relaxed.

I ran through the crowded streets, wondering what I'd just done and what would happen to me. I saw a staircase between two buildings and quickly climbed it. There was another staircase, further down from where I stood, so I ran to it and continued climbing higher and higher until I was about two blocks away from where I'd escaped. I leaned against the wall, exhausted; though my shoes were beautiful, they were definitely not made for running. I looked toward the sky, at the castle overlooking Taormina. Fuck no, I can't endure a whole year of this, I thought.

"It used to be a fortress," I heard a voice say from behind me. "Do you want to keep running there, or will you save my men the effort, and remember - they don't have the same heart condition as you."

I turned to see Massimo standing on the steps. I could tell he'd been running after me, as his hair was now messy from the wind, but he wasn't gasping for air like I was. He leaned against the wall and casually put his hands in his pockets.

"We must head back now; if you need a work out, there's a gym at my residence, along with a swimming pool. If you were just interested in running up some stairs, I've got a number of them waiting for you."

I knew I had no choice but to go back with him, but at least for a brief moment it'd felt like I was doing what I wanted to do. He reached his hand out to me, but I ignored it and started back down the stairs, where two men now stood in black suits. I glared at them both, walked to the SUV parked next to them, climbed inside and slammed the door.

* * * * * * *

It was a while before Massimo joined me in the car. He sat next to me, phone to his ear, until we arrived back at his villa and parked in the driveway. I had no idea what his conversation was about, as I only understood a few words of Italian, but his tone was very flat and calm. He listened for most of the call, speaking only a few brief sentences here and there, his body language giving nothing away.

I tried grabbing the door handle to exit the vehicle, but it was locked. Massimo finished his conversation, put the phone inside his jacket pocket and looked at me. "Dinner will be ready in an hour; I'll send Domenico to get you."

The car door opened and the young man extended a hand to help me out. I got out without his help and passed him, smiling brightly. I walked inside, with Domenico following close behind, and kept my focus away from the area that'd been the scene of last night's nightmare.

"To the right," he said quietly as I headed through the wrong door. I looked back and nodded, thanking him for his direction, and moments later arrived back to my room. Domenico stood in the doorway, as if waiting for permission to enter.

"I'll have the items you've purchased today brought here for you. Is there anything else I can do for you?" He asked.

"Yes, I'd like to have a drink before dinner - unless I'm not allowed to, of course."

He smiled and nodded knowingly, then disappeared into the darkness of the corridor. I went into the bathroom, closed the door and threw off my dress. I stood in the shower and turned on the cold water; after today, I needed to cool down. The freezing water made it difficult to breathe but became pleasant after a while, and once my emotions had been cooled, I increased the temperature. I washed my hair, applied conditioner and sat back against the wall. The water was comfortably warm and flowing gently down the glass panels surrounding the shower, soothing me.1

I took a moment to stop and think about the day's events. I was so confused; Massimo was such a complicated man, and very unpredictable. I realized that if I didn't start to accept the situation I found myself in and try my best to live a normal life, I'd quickly become defeated.

Another thought occurred to me - What was I fighting for? There was nothing waiting for me back in Warsaw, and everything I'd once had was now gone; all that was left was the adventure that fate had thrust upon me. It's time to get a grip and come to terms with this situation, Laura, I thought to myself, then stood up from the floor.

I rinsed my hair and wrapped it in a towel, then put on a bathrobe and left the bathroom to see dozens of boxes filling the bedroom. I was overwhelmed at the sight of them, but I had a plan in mind for my purchases.

I found some bags with the Victoria's Secret logo and started to dig through the dozens of options Massimo had picked out for me, eventually coming across the red lace set I'd tried on earlier in the store. I searched some more boxes to find a short, see-through black dress, then pulled out a matching pair of Louboutin heels. Now that's an outfit that Massimo definitely won't be able to handle.1

I headed back to the bathroom, toward the vanity, taking the bottle of champagne that was by the fireplace with me. I poured myself a glass and emptied it in one breath; I needed some liquid courage. I poured another, sat down in front of the mirror and got to work with my cosmetics. When I'd finished, my eyes were well defined, my complexion was perfect and my lips glistened with flesh-colored Chanel lipstick. I dried my hair, curling it slightly and pinned it up in a tall bun.

Domenico's voice came through the door. "Laura, dinner is waiting."

"Two more minutes, and I'll be ready," I shouted through the door while putting on my underwear. I quickly threw on the dress, slipped the high heels over my feet and generously applied some of my beloved perfume. I stood in front of the mirror and nodded with satisfaction. I looked simply divine; the see-through dress was stunning, and the red lace that showed through perfectly matched the red soles of my shoes. It was very elegant, and very provocative.

I quickly finished my third glass of champagne and, though slightly inebriated, was ready for dinner.

Domenico opened his eyes wide as he saw me leave the bathroom. "You look..." He paused, searching for the right word.1

"I know, and thank you," I replied, smiling flirtatiously.

"Those heels are to die for," he said, almost whispering, and gave me his arm. I took it and allowed him to lead me through the corridor. We went out onto the terrace where I'd had breakfast this morning, the canvas roof now reflecting the light of hundreds of candles placed neatly around the patio. Massimo stood with his back to us, staring off into the distance.

"I'll go on alone," I said, letting go of the young man's arm.

With that, Domenico disappeared, and I took a step toward Massimo. He looked back at the sound of my heels hitting the stone floor. He was dressed in gray linen pants and a light sweater of the same color, with the sleeves rolled up. He approached the table and set the glass he'd been holding in his hand down, watching every step I took as I came to him.

He leaned back on the table as I stopped in front of him, parting his legs slightly. I stood between them, keeping my eyes on him. The sexual tension between us was electric, and I would've been able to feel his desire for me even if I was blind.

"Do you like what you see?" I asked quietly, biting my lower lip. Massimo straightened himself to show me that, even in high heels, I was shorter than him.

"You are aware," he whispered, "that if you tempt me now, I won't be able to control myself?"

I rested my hand on his hard chest and gave him a gentle push, signalling that I wanted him to sit down. He didn't resist me, and slowly sat down in the chair. His eyes were curious and burning with passion - he examined my face, my dress, my shoes, and above all, the red lace that dominated my outfit. I stood close enough to him that the only scent he was able to focus on was my perfume. I tucked my right hand in his hair to gently pull his head down, and he gave in to me completely.

I brought my lips closer to his, and quietly asked, "Are you satisfied now?"

After a moment of silence, I let go of his hair, went to the cooler and poured myself a drink. Massimo was still sitting there, inspecting me with his eyes, his lips forming a smile. I sat down away from him, playing with the edge of my glass.

"Let's eat," I told him, giving him a bored look.

He stood up and came toward me, putting his hands on my shoulders. He bent down, took a deep breath and whispered, "You look wonderful." He brushed the edge of my ear with his tongue. "Never has a woman affected me the way that you do."

His teeth ran gently over my neck. A shiver coursed through my body, the beginning of which radiated from between my legs. "I want to throw you on this table, pull that short dress up and toss away those panties." I took a deep breath, feeling the excitement growing within me.

"I could smell your perfume from the doorway; I want to lick it off your entire body," he continued, then began to clench and move his hands rhythmically and firmly around my arms.1

"There's one place on my body that you can't touch yet," I said.

"And that's exactly where I want to be," he replied, ending his sensual argument with me. He started to gently kiss and bite my neck. I didn't object, turning my head to the side for better access. His hands slid slowly down my neckline and eventually came to my breasts, which he squeezed firmly. I let out a low moan.

"I know that you want me, Laura." I felt his hands and lips move away. "But remember, this is my game, and I set the rules."

He gave me one final kiss on the cheek, then sat in the chair next to me. He'd won and we both knew it, but that didn't change the fact that his pants were once again too tight for his body. I pretended to be unmoved by the situation, but that only seemed to amuse my companion. He sat there playing with his glass of champagne, a sly smile clearly visible on his face.

Domenico appeared in the doorway, looked at us then disappeared back into the house. A moment later, two men came out to serve us a starter of carpaccio and octopus, which were both delicious, and the next few courses only got better.

We ate in silence, giving each other quick, playful glances from time to time. As we finished, I moved my chair away from the table, poured another glass of pink wine and said, "Cosa nostra."

Massimo shot me a warning look.

"As far as I know, it doesn't exist - is that true?"

He sneered and asked in a low voice, "What else do you think you know, baby?"

I started to nervously turn the glass between my fingers. "Well, I'm sure everyone has seen The Godfather; I'm just wondering how much of that movie is true about you."

"About me?" He asked, surprised. "There's nothing in that movie about me, as far as I know."

I could tell he was making fun of me. He wouldn't answer my roundabout questions, so I asked him directly, "What exactly do you do?"

"I'm a businessman."

I didn't give up, pressing him again.

"Seriously? You expect a year-long declaration of obedience from me, but you don't think I should know what I'm signing up for?"

His expression turned serious, his eyes glaring at me. "You have every right to expect some answers, and I'll give them to you as much as I can; you deserve that much, at least." He took a sip of his wine. "After my father's death, I became the chosen head of the family, which is why people address me as 'don'. I own several companies - clubs, restaurants, hotels; think of our family like a corporation, and I'm the CEO. Our family is part of a larger overall group, though, but I won't get into that now. If you'd like the full history I can give it to you, but I think having such intimate knowledge would be unnecessary, and even dangerous."

He seemed to be growing increasingly more annoyed as he spoke. "To be honest, I'm not sure what it is, exactly, that you want to know. Are you asking if I have a consigliere? Well I do, and I'm sure you'll meet him soon enough. Are you asking if I'm a dangerous man, or if I solve my problems through violence? I'm sure those questions were answered for you last night. Now, is there anything else?"

There were a million thoughts running through my head, but nothing more that I needed to know then. The situation had been clear for some time, though I hadn't realized it. I guess my questions really were answered last night, like he said.

"When will you give me my phone and computer back?"

Massimo adjusted in his chair, throwing his leg onto his knee. "Whenever you want, baby. We'll just need to discuss what you'll say to the people you want to contact."

I drew a breath to say something, but he raised his hand to cut me off. "Before you even start, let me tell you how this will go. You'll call your parents, and if necessary, you'll fly back to Poland." My eyes lit up at those words, and the expression on my face turned to joy.

"You'll tell them that you received a very lucrative job offer at one of the hotels here in Sicily, and that you intend to take the offer. I'll make sure the contract includes a one-year probationary period, so you won't have to lie to your loved ones when you want to contact them.

"Your belongings were removed from Martin's apartment before he returned to Warsaw, and should be here on the island tomorrow. Consider the subject of this man now closed; I don't want you having anything to do with him anymore."

I looked at him questioningly.

"In case I wasn't clear the first time, let me say it again: I forbid you from contacting him," he said firmly. "Now, is there anything else?"

I was silent for a moment. He'd thought of every possibility; the story was well planned and made sense.

"And what if I need to visit my family?" I continued. "What then?"

Massimo frowned. "Well, then I guess I'll get to know your beautiful country."

I laughed and sipped my wine. I can already see the newspaper headlines - Head of Sicilian Mafia Appears in Warsaw, I thought to myself.

"Do I have a say in any of this?" I asked inquisitively.

"Unfortunately, this isn't up for discussion; this is how it's going to happen." He leaned toward me. "Laura, you're a smart girl. I would've thought by now that you would've realized one simple truth - I always get what I want."

"Not always, Don Massimo," I responded, dropping my eyes to look at the lace underwear that peeked out from under my dress. I bit my lip and slowly rose from the chair, with Massimo watching intently. I took off my wonderful red-soled heels and headed for the garden.

The grass was moist and the air tasted of sea salt. I knew that he wouldn't be able to resist the temptation to follow me for long, and after a few moments he gave in to that temptation. It was peaceful in the garden, with only the lights from the boats swaying in the distant sea to guide me. I stopped when I reached the square couch with canopy that I'd taken a nap on earlier in the day.

"You feel comfortable here, don't you?" Massimo asked, standing next to me, and he was right - I did feel comfortable here. This place didn't feel strange or new to me, and I felt like I'd lived here my entire life. Besides, what girl wouldn't like to stay in a beautiful Italian villa, with all of these comforts and services?

"I'm getting used to it because I have no other choice," I replied, taking another sip of wine. Massimo took the glass from my hand and threw it onto the grass. He took me in his arms and placed me gently on the white pillows. My breath sped up, knowing what was about to happen. He flipped one leg above me and lay on top of me, like this morning. I'd been afraid then, but now all I felt was curiosity and excitement; maybe the alcohol had finally caught up to me, or maybe I'd just accepted the situation I'd found myself in.

Massimo, with his hands on both sides of my head, leaned forward into me. "I'd like to kiss you," he whispered, nudging my lips.

I froze. A man so dangerous and powerful, asking for permission to show me tenderness and love? My hands went to his face and stopped on his cheeks. I held him for a moment, looking deeply into his calm, black eyes, then pulled him to me gently. When our lips met, Massimo attacked me with all of his strength, forcefully and greedily opening my mouth wider and wider, our tongues moving in one rhythm. His body fell over me, arms entangled around my shoulders. We both wanted each other, our lips and tongues massaging each other deeply and passionately.

Once the adrenaline had flowed away and I'd calmed down slightly, I realized what I was doing. "Wait, stop it," I said, pushing him away.

Massimo didn't intend on stopping, though. He grabbed my wrists firmly and pressed them against the white sofa, raising my hands above my head. He removed one hand and started caressing my thigh, following the curve of my body until he came across the lace panties. He grabbed them and took his mouth away from mine.

The pale light from the distant lighthouse illuminated my terrified face. I didn't fight him; there was no chance of winning. I lay there quietly, tears streaming down my cheeks. Upon seeing this, he let go of my hands, threw himself off me and sat down, resting his feet on wet grass.1

"You little..." he whispered heavily. "You know, when your whole life revolves around violence and you've had to fight for everything, it's difficult to react kindly when someone takes away something you desire."

He stood up and ran a hand through his hair while pacing, leaving me lying on my back. I was furious with Massimo, but at the same time, I felt sorry for him. He didn't strike me as one of those men who violently took women and tortured them; this kind of behavior was just natural to him, with a strong touch being as casual as a handshake. He'd also never cared about anyone before, and never needed to consider anyone else's emotions. Now that he wanted someone to reciprocate his feelings, the only way he knew to accomplish that was by force.

A vibration from his pants pulled us from the terrifying silence. Massimo took out his phone, looked at the screen, then answered. While he was talking, I wiped my tears away and stood up from the couch, slowly walking toward the house. I was tired, drunk and completely confused. It took me a minute, but eventually I arrived back at my room and passed out on the bed, completely exhausted.

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