#now im not saying that freddy in this au did the “My name is Michael Afton” tiktok edit

[soupmanspeaks]

NO BECAUSE IT WOULD BE REALLY FUNNY IF GREG AND CASSIE WERE IN ON THEIR PARENTS SHENANIGANS JUST GLAMROCK FREDDY POWERED DOWN IN HIS GREEN ROOM AND THEM FRANTICALLY MAKING EXPLANATIONS TO THE KIDS LIKE "ohhh freddy--uH--he-….forgOT HIS MORNING COFFEE!!" "wh-ohhhOHHHHH YEAHHHH….!! he….alwAYS HAS A COFFEE!!! HEH…cant-…can't power through without it!!!" internally, they're both like "FREDDY GET BACK HERE NOW THERES DISSAPOINTED KIDS AND ANGRY PARENTS WHERE ARE YOU" and then in the vents down below its just that one image of AUTO from WALL-E going "GIVE ME THE PLANT" Liz:"JEREMY JUST GIVE US THE DOLL-" Jer: "I NEED TO PUT FOOD ON THE TABLE, LIZZIE-" Charlie: "JEREMY, MICHAEL IS HAVING A MELTDOWN IN HIS GREEN ROOM AND THE STAFF CONTROL SHOCKING HIM BY THE MINUTE TO WAKE HIM UP, I WILL GIVE YOU TO THE COUNT OF 5 TO GIVE US THE DOLL OR SO HELP M-" Also yes I know its never stated in Security Breach that controlled shocks are used on the Glamrocks but you know what? for angst and silly purposes of torturing my blorbos I'm adding it to this au eheheheheh

I have this silly little au where everything is sort of the same, except the Afton Siblings just talked out everything, and now Michael just has his two ghost siblings chill around him when he's working This started because I had a thought about Michael, CC, and Elizabeth having a BANGER prank idea, they're going to like, a Walmart or something, and they buy a bag of candy, and when Michael goes to check out, he's holding both Elizabeth and CC's hands. yk, normal brother stuff, the cashier asks "is the candy for the kids lol" yk, for small talks sake, and then Michael responds with "What kids?" The cashier looks back to where the kids were and finds that they're not there, as well as both of Michael's hands being in his pockets lol like fast forward to when he becomes GlamFreddy (I'd assume the fire happened in the pizza sim location because they wanted to get rid of William) and like, so many shenanigans will ensue Like, the Pizzaplex is setting up stuff for Halloween? What's better than to get real ghosts that can induce nightmares onto you! Or maybe one day, Freddy and the two will pass by the Cupcake Shoppe, which'll be selling Ice Cream cupcakes one day (those exist, right?) and Freddy'll say "Omg, look, Elizabeth, you can finally get your ice cream now!" And then Elizabeth will sucker punch him in the chest cavity Speaking of chest cavity, as they're getting the ice cream, Elizabeth points to the ice cream, mid-scoop, and says to Freddy: "Omg, look, Freddy, its you!"

Or like, idk, maybe some kid will be a bit too scared to hug GlamFreddy, or something, and then CC will just go "It's okay, he wont bite" and then just turns to look at Freddy with the most sh** eating grin ever as the guy struggles to contain a robo mental break down so many thoughts lol /pos

[thegoodomensdumpster]

I WATCHED GOOD OMENS IN FRENCH SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO

and it wasn’t that bad. Here are my thoughts, barely edited as I wrote most of them while watching the show.

EP 1

OK i like god’s voice so far

possibilité d’embarras gastrique is a good formulation, I wonder if it’s the same in the book ( I think I kinda need to read it in french now...)

aghghdhgs « primo-délinquants »

of course subtitles don’t match the audio for a variety of technical reasons but when you get things that have very different underlying meanings i find it… not good This one about Crowley being evil / a demon : subtitles : « c’est ton travail » - « it’s your job » audio : « c’est dans ta nature » - « it’s in your nature » i mean dang

crowley sounds like a little shit asking az about his sword

« T’AS FAIT QUOUA » - he just loses his shit (kinda giving me some le coeur a ses raisons vibe)

ok crowley sounds very nerdy when he tries to explain that he took down the phone network, i think i actually like this voice acting

ligur sounds… very suave (im a little ill at ease)

crowley getting called mon chou by satan freddie mercury is a thumb up from me

i see the part where aziraphale speaks japanese wasn’t dubbed over and we can still hear michael sheen. it’s a bit disturbing considering french aziraphale has a higher pitched voice (and he sounds soooo much more anxious than sheen, give this angel a xanax )

“sandwich bœuf cresson” ( beef and cress sandwich ) deirdre really who makes this kind of sandwiches

im being reminded that the chattering nuns prepared little cut outs for their explanation about the antichrist switch… such dedication to useless crafts (it made me laugh on my first viewing and it’s still funny to imagine that some of them either ordered or built these things themselves just so they could make this two minutes long presentation for the most important act of their satanic nun careers)

retire-toi vil démon infernal, créature des abysses XD i swear az doesn’t sound even remotely convinced when he is saying the « get thee behind me foul fiend » line in french, it’s just too over the top for credibility, it sounds like it’s straight out of some super intense dnd session

they still can’t say bouillabaisse (which, like, weird because french, but still valid). nice touch is crowley couldn’t say soupe de poisson (fish stew) either and said poupe de soisson (sish ftew)

warlock mah boy how can you be a teenager and not like dinosaurs

c’est un dinosaure un nullosaure plutôt - apply burn heal

La façon dont warlock s’est exclamé « C’EST NUL » m’a fait penser au nain de naheulbeuk

the english version has nothing on french speaking aziraphale for the second hand embarrassement during the magic tour. it’s over 9000 i literally hid my head in my jumper when he was presenting harry the bunny. Horrible experience, 0/20, would not recommend

EP 2

oooh agnes has a lovely voice !

why is young newton having such a quality dub for the three sentences he has to say

dick turpin’s name is jesse james (tbf dick turpin is not known AT ALL in france, i discovered him reading good omens)

shadwell is pure chaos (as expected). No particular accent for him though, the chaotic energy was probably enough. Would have made me laugh if he had like, a chti or a marseilles accent.

aziraphale is so fucking stressed out by crowley’s driving i thought he was gonna explode

« tu es un gentil garçon » => « you’re a nice boy » said az to crowley DANG THAT’S SO INFANTILIZING AZIRAPHALE YOU’RE TALKING TO A DEMON FROM HELL NOT TO PINOCCHIO

ARGH FIRST MON ANGE OF THE SERIES i’m hit straight in the heart

anathema’s mom doesn’t have a spanish / latino accent at all when talking in spanish…. why...

dog being called toutou is definitely adorable (it’s basically « doggy » but way cuter imo)

tickety-boo has become ça gaze. that’s valid. it’s corny but i still use it unironically from time to time so ... i stan

EP 3

« je répands la fomentation » « i’m here spreading foment » « quoi tu fais des crêpes au froment ?????? »  « what you’re making crêpes with wheat ??? » love the fact that we shoehorned in one more ref to crêpes

az called crowley mon cher camarade, unintentionnal communist propaganda ftw

« pas de repos pour les… bah, pour les bons » « no rest for the… good »  – az was so deflated about the ineptitude he realized he was saying, he felt zero percent commited to his sentence

i was wondering how they would play aziraphale not being able to speak french in the bastille and they opted to have him stutter a bit and say to his executionner « excuse me i’m anxious » XD

« vous êtes le 999e aristo à mourir par mes soins. Mais vous êtes le premier en costume beige » « you’re the 999th aristocrat I’m going to kill, but the first one in beige attire » yeah i guess now that az isn’t english anymore his most noticeable feature is his cream aesthetic

« c’est au cas où ça tournerait en eau de boudin » « j’ADORE le boudin » => « in case it all goes pear shape » - the literal translation featuring food in french is « turning into black sausage water ». I don’t know what pear shaped inspires to english native speakers but the mere mention of boudin always make me giggle, it’s such a funny word and such a funny food

OH !!! no terrence rampa for the tv series, we’ve got anthony J. rampa. Rip terrence petit démon parti trop tôt :’(

« tu roules trop vite pour moi rampa » SERIOUSLY i know we can still infer « rouler » (here as in driving, but literally rolling) as a metaphor for their relationship but you could have said TU VAS TROP VITE that would have been so much better argh

has anathema got an emergency stock of potteries to break in case of emotionnal crisis ?

« Rampa, un démon très futé, il m’oblige à redoubler d’effort » « crowley, a very clever demon, he forces me to make double the amount of effort » oh so admitting you’re making an effort there aziraphale ? :))))))

dang i really want to know how shadwell said that major milk bottle died because not only did he die in combat but aziraphale’s reaction is a bit intense, it must have been quite a tale (this could be a crack fic prompt : «The Epic Tale of the Death Of Major Witchfinder Milk Bottle, by Sargent Witchfinder Shadwell» )

des sorcières et des phénomènes sorciéreux x)

CROWLEY CALLED AZIRAPHALE DUCON ?????? EXCUSE ME ????? #NotMyCrowley #CrowleyWouldNeverDoThat  #CancelAnthonyJRampa2K20  => ducon would be an insult, the gathering of du and con, con being a very nasty but common swear word, and associating it with du- makes it extremely patronizing. it’s like « absolute pathetic digraceful moron +++ ». thanks i hate it *frowny face *

EP 4

l’apocalypse c’est pour aujourd’hui juste après le goûter : it could be translated as « apocalypse is scheduled for today right after tea time » except that « goûter » is not quite tea time but rather the little sugary snack kids take when they come back from school and that most adults drop out of (i haven’t and i’m sure az hasn’t either). thanks aziraphale for having exclusively food related notion of the time because tbh same

ligur has no right to be this sexy between ariyon bakare and his french voice actor that’s just not allowed

radio crowley’s voice vs french ligur’s voice, who has the sexiest voice : FIGHT

(jk french agnes nutter’s voice is by far the sexiest)

gender neutral doesn’t ‘quite’ exist in french but pollution has been assigned a female voice actress and masculine pronouns (i’m saying it doesn’t quite exist because officially we have no gender neutral, but it’s a serious wip among lgbt+ circles to the point where it’s started being used in a few medias)

hastur « en attendant qu’un plombier vienne » / « while waiting for a plumber to come » does hell have a special plumber unit or do demons have to call on human plumbers for their pipes damages ? Dang hastur having to call a human plumber for hell’s plumbery is another damn good writing prompt for a crack fic

Michael is called Michel in the subtitles but Michael in the audio *shrug emoji*

EP 5 

to get a wiggle on has become « il faut qu’on se remue les fesses », literally « we need to shake our butts » like, yes, se remuer les fesses is a common expression to say « we need to act in order to get things done » but it really casts the image of people shaking their booty to some music and obviously crowley thinks the same Weirdly enough I have almost nothing to say for that episode. Sorry. But we’ve discovered most voice actors and actresses so far and no bit of dialogue really struck me as worth discussing or pointing fingers to mock it.

EP 6 

« on va BROUTER quelques derrières » - « we’re gonna lick some butts » OK THIS IS UNQUESTIONNABLY FAR SUPERIOR IN FRENCH THAN IN ENGLISH you thought LICKING butts was good ??? you really thought that ???? AZIRAPHALE HERE SUGGESTS TO GRAZE BUTTS. TO NIBBLE THEM. TO EAT THEM. TO. MUNCH. ON. THOSE. BUTTS!!!! not just licking, guys. This is as serious step beyond licking. (oh yeah he should have said « botter » instead of brouter btw, which is really just kicking, fyi)

« moi je crois en la paix, pétasse ! » wow, language, pepper (fyi i think « pétasse » is far far worse than « bitch » even if it means roughly the same, pétasse is almost never used while bitch is rather common, so it’s a swear word +++)

Dagon sounds like she’s got a nasty cold. #GetDagonIbuprofen2K20

I can confirm that Crowley offers Aziraphale to not just stay at his place, but to move in with him. « tu peux t’installer chez moi si tu veux ». omg they were roommates.

Bad translation strikes again : i don’t know why, but the french dub doesn’t have the « tickety-boo » / « ça gaze » being referenced as Rampa / Aziraphale is being knocked down, which is… a real mistep. It was narratively significant and I’m quite mad the translators missed it.

The Jesse James explanation from Newt has become very nonsensical, instead of the neat and to the point pun « wherever I go I hold up trafic » we’re getting a circonvoluted « because it’s a crime to mechanic’s diligence ». I’m not judging that one too hard, I have no idea how to make it better, and that’s probably how it was translated in the book as well thirty years ago, but it definitely doesn’t have the same impact. On the other hand, it definitely IS a very bad joke that doesn’t even deserve a chuckle, so Anathema’s embarassement really matches the audience’s (aka mine).

OVERALL :

I wasn’t convinced by Crowley… I mean, Rampa’s voice at first, but as the nerdiness showed up it really grew on me. I still think that french dubs have often problems with some voice inflexions every here and there, and for instance in Rampa’s case it was when he was annoyed or frustrated ( at the Globe when complaining about horses and Shakespeare’s plays that aren’t comedies, and also when discussing Azirphale’s magic tricks, it’s like… there is a step between having the right amount of grumpy complaining and overdoing it that is overlooked. It’s overacted, it should have been a bit quieter imo. I don’t mean to criticize voice actors too hard either but as an audience watching french dubs this is a very recurring problem and it always feels off to me. It’s actually one of the main reasons I avoid french dubs whenever possible.)

I have a hard time judging Aziraphale’s voice dub because it clashes so much with both the idea I had formed with it when I read the book and Sheen’s delivery that I just… kinda filtered it. It was too high pitched for me, and too anxious (though for this last point I must admit it could be funny at times, but I’m not fond of this character portrayal). The rest of the cast was rather good, nothing to complain about. There wasn’t anything stellar either, but everything that needed to be conveyed was and it was professionnal. It was also very homogeneous, no voice really struck me as being way too bad or way too good compared to the others, so it was really consistant.

So I don’t have much to complain about overall despite a few wonky translations here and there, BUT there is one thing I felt very robbed of : Crowley calling Aziraphale « mon ange » happens only once, when giving a lift to Anathema, and I’m almost certain they translated it that way because otherwise the joke about Anathama mistaking them for a couple wouldn’t work. So, they were forced to make it that way. The rest of the time Crowley calls Aziraphale « l’angelot », and despite being literally translated by « little angel », it feels sarcastic more than anything else ( the « L’ » in front of « angelot » is part of the reason why, it creates some distance, the other reason being that this word in itself has a very corny vibe and people being affectionnate to each other wouldn’t use it as a term of endearment). So, that’s a shame.

I like the English dub much much MUCH better than the French, but the french wasn’t nearly as bad as I was expecting it to be. The voice actors and actresses were quite good, the dialogues mostly faithful and endearing despite a few really missed steps. It really had its moments. Props to brouter des derrières, that one was fantastic.

[siramay-the-showgun-dragon]

out of context kingdom hearts quotes but for my fnaf KH au

and also since KH is a crossover this fnaf au crosses over with some of my parody ideas and other show/games enjoy

Jeremy: the remains obey me now Mike! Now I have nothing to fear... Mike:....YOU'RE STUPID!

blashem shows up  Fox: MIKE! ITS BLAAHEM! 

Mike: oh right! Wargreymon we have to talk!  Wargreymon: flicks mike  Mike: DAH  Wargreymon: I came to share a bit of mildly interesting news 

Chica: as soon as the trouble started a made sure to seal this room  giant door with force field  fades  tiny door in big door opens

Mia: I'm looking for someone have any of you seen a man with long hair  bonnie and fox look at mike  Mike: pulls on long hair and beard 

Shadow Freddy: Aztec treasure ay? Le-mon: ey 

Takanshe: running  hi Mike!  runs off

Freddy: bonnie Bonnie: XP  Fox: oh no bonnie!  Mike: this is not happening This cant be happening  Freddy: they'll pay for this  epically takes off hood 

Fox: NOW YE GONNA DEAL WITH ME!  runs and fazes right trough black hat  Black hat: all in good time 

Bootleg: I have you now hackshark! Today I'll be rid of you forever!  hackshark: next to eliza  I'm busy right now bootleg! Where on a expedition Cant I show you up some other time! Bootleg: you'll show me up now! 

Skeith: evil laugh  evil laugh  EVIL LAUGH 

pokemike oranguru: it is time!

Fox: well it sure does look like creepy pa....  looks at forth wall  Bonnie: looks at forth wall  Mike: looks at fourth wall

Saturn “dismas” and mike Freddy: say fellas did someone mention the door to darkness?  freddy in a edgy hood 

Mike: hey I didnt catch your name  Buddy: dream eaters!  Mike: that's a weird name  Buddy: not me them! 

Mike: wait a second!  Are you black hat?  Black hat: fades form existence 

Sammy: I'm hanging on to her dreams for her there my portal  Mike:????  Sammy:.... let's just say her dreams are a gateway between worlds  Mike: ah! 

Mike: ok where do I get a "sound idea"?

grant: NO PLEASE DONT I don't wanna!- phone guy: goodbye  thanos snap grant: boom  mike: ._. 

Jeremy: how am I gonna face everyone!  mike: like this! proceeds to make face :P 

mike: great thanks mister!  Dan: where are you going?  mike: to find mc  Dan: do you even know where he is? mike: nope no idea! 

freddy: you got an idea?  bonnie: and it might even be a good one to! hold on  freddy: sure take your time  bonnie: proceeds to throw freddy out the window  CHARGE 

mike: hey akuma good luck  fox: and remember to be good!  akuma: I'm off!  finger guns away 

spring trap: denizens of light answer this, why do you hate the darkness  freddy: aw we don't hate it, its just kinda...scary 

photorealistic scott: hahaha I'm a fool 

all: wow!  dr bright: well hello everyone!  did you come to see if your on my nice list? 

dan: look at other dan  other dan: looks at dan  kicks dan in the stomach 

phone dude/security puppet: is purple me?  I'm already half Afton! 

rainbow fruit bat of death fly's 

junko: falls DISPAIR IS MINE!  dies 

phone dude: hey i got an idea! ask your heart see if its got a clue  mike: well... my heart was aching... that's why I kept going  phone dude: awe thank you mikes heart 

Jeremy and Charlie mike: huh?  they shift to Michael and eliza  mike: who?  Michael: Brendon  eliza: Brendon  mike who is now Brendon (who is crying child who is probably Cassidy): huh? 

fox: ay I don't understand what be going on 

freddy: drowns 

spring trap: walks down ALOT of stairs 

mia: takes down painting showing scribbles then punches wall  \('. ')/  leaves 

Monika: gives disc to hoto  dan: YES!

Eliza: who are those lady's?  alphyes: oh!  runs to answer her question 

takanshe: what do you guys do for fun?  fox: we do THIS!  makes face  takanshe: uh..

freddy: why? how was I so blind 

Milotic: jabs Wayneright in the stomach and runs of with the rose  mike: good one Milotic! 

phone guy: walking  john: runs up but fazes right trough  Carlton: also runs but faze right trough 

Vincent: I am William from the most distant past my future self gave me a task to visit the splintered version of myself in many worlds and ensure they gather here today  eats toast evilly and eat lots of toast  spring trap: I don think he-  Vincent:  no no he definitely did 

arty: that was undeniable proof that we totally own you lamers! 

glitch trap: its always about your friends isn't it? Brendon: at least I have some! 

Jeremy/scott that's actually a clone: because im you  Jeremy: no I'm me!  Jeremy scott: I'm me he says 

mike: Charlie....Charlies inside me?  noice but also WAT 

burny: who are you?  spring trap: I'm all that's left...or maybe I'm all that ever was  burny: I meant your name 

William: you don't need a home where your going!  Michael: WHAT 

Jeremy: I knew when I met you! you and Charlie smell the same  puppet: that's weird  Jeremy: I know 

Tarzan parody universe cause au’s Charlie: oh now I get it hsfvhsebfkfwe means heart 

lefty fades from existence  burny:  LE GASP  lefty! who else will I have ice cream with! 

data mike: FREDDY! its Jeremy! THE PUT BUGS IN HIM  freddy: WAT 

William: literally freezes Brendon solid and drops him  eliza: Brendon! are you ok?

lefty: why? your the real shame!  Jeremy: fair enough, you could say I am... the biggest nobody of them all  leaves with dramatic novella music in the background  lefty: ANIMATRONIC SCREAM