#now i can't look at jesse's baby blues without fucking sobbing up a storm
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hoss-bonaventure Ā· 1 year ago
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i want to expand on this post just cause i can.
so much of gus and jesseā€™s relationship is played as an affair. this is only because it makes waltā€™s anger about their dynamic feel more jilted, like a lover. when he confronts jesse about the two of them having dinner he uses language an excusatory husband would use if he caught his spouse cheating such as ā€œtell me you werenā€™t as his house last night?ā€ itā€™s very clearly written as jesse being disloyal to walt and their partnership. now the audience knows thatā€™s just simply not true with jesse literally saying ā€œif you kill mr. white, youā€™re going to have to kill me tooā€ when he thinks gus is suggesting killing him. heā€™s devoted to mr. white throughly. even when heā€™s being shoved into these new situations by mike and gus, thereā€™s never a moment where he thinks about abandoning him. heā€™s still in the back of his mind through everything, and every character knows this except for walt. thatā€™s what makes most of the build-up leading to gusā€™s death so ironic. to walt, gus is the other woman who needs to be killed for fraternizing with whatā€™sĀ ā€œhisā€. in reality, itā€™s his own brutality and sadistic behavior that is putting a wedge between him and jesse.Ā 
itā€™s very reminiscent of walt finding out about skylerā€™s affair with ted. he lashes out and throws a tantrum but he never stops for a second and asks why it happened. he never comes to the conclusion that his actions are whatā€™s driving skyler into anotherā€™s arms. he plots to get revenge on ted, but itā€™s never more serious than toxic masculine how-dare-you-sleep-with-my-wife bullshit. he wants to kill him, i donā€™t doubt that, but he canā€™t. how can he? killing, torturing, and all that depravity belongs in theĀ ā€œheisenbergā€ part of his life. he cannot touch ted because he is as mundane as the life he is fronting.Ā 
now, i will admit, the skyler affair storyline and jesseā€™s so-called adultery are really not that similar at all. like i said, jesse is not betraying anyone--he is still fiercely dedicated to mr. white. his unfaithfulness is only interpreted as much by walt himself, and itā€™s waltā€™s delusions drive him away in the first place. skyler cheats as a means of revenge, as a way to take back some autonomy that walt had stripped her of. however, itā€™s the way that walt handles these individual perfidies thatā€™s so captivating to me. when deciding what to do with gus, he immediately decides he needs to kill him. this was his plan prior, but now itā€™s more dire. jesse is gone. he needs to kill two birds with one stone: win back jesse and kill gus. more importantly, he needs to show jesse that him killing gus was something he did for the both of them. so thus he embarks on this convoluted, deplorable, fucked-up scheme. and hey! it works. he successfully manipulates jesse once again, implanting in his brain that no one will have your best interests at heart but me.Ā ā€œgus had to goā€ and jesse has to agree because this pseudo-son is dying and mr. white is right there and he saved him right? he saved brock and he saved jesse and it doesnā€™t matter that their love has a body count. their reunion is so impactful because theyā€™re like magnets in a way. the connection they share is so strong that it doesnā€™t matter how hard they fight or run away, they will cling to each other once more. but whatā€™s devastating this time around is that jesse doesnā€™t have a leg to stand on with mr. white anymore. he almost fucking killed him and it turns out the ā€œrealā€ mastermind was gus all along. so he offers his submission as an apology, when mr. white holds out his hand he takes it because this is how he can say heā€™s sorry. and walt? how could he not fall in love all over again. he has jesse, freshly martyred and in his arms once again.Ā 
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