#now excuse me bc i gotta get ready for work oof

[quietlyblooms]

good morning!! bc of my lil hc blurb last night, i’m still thinking about how controlled chiyo is physically despite touch being one of her love languages. as friends, she gets more comfortable linking your arms/holding hands and doing something like laying her head on your shoulder, but it’s still toned down. she doesn’t touch you as much as she wants, doesn’t initiate hugs often, etc. bc she’s embarrassed to want these things so much and doesn’t want to come off as clingy. but the more comfortable you are with her, the more chiyo will be physically affectionate without overthinking it. particularly if you’re dating, chiyo will bounce back and forth between control and throwing caution to the wind :’ ) she wants to be touching you always ( unless she’s working bc it would distract her asdf ), yet she doesn’t want to be too much. she almost always wants any and all attention and affection you’re willing to give, but she doesn’t want to be seen wanting it so much.

chiyo’s got a certain amount of shame with her desire, you could say, and it takes some work getting past it.

[wongiemei]

Roommate!Jeno

a/n: maybe i should just turn this blog into an nct dream one

okay

letsgetit!

first of all,

story time!

your uni is fucking expensive and it’s more expensive if you live in the grounds

so you being the wise human,

you went to get an apartment near the campus

it was great and all since roommate!jaemin was paying for his stuff

you were both living respectively until he had to leave

the dumbass didnt even bother to tell you

one morning you just woke up and found his note

‘hey bitch! figured you were too much of a rock to wake up but i moved out! the family wants me to go back home and tend the restaurant’

the whole day yesterday, you were working

bc,,, yknow

broke college life

and you just walked in half asleep towards your room and fell asleep

so you didnt really see or notice

but were you freaking out bc your roommate suddenly moved out?

ofc you were freaking out

not only was your roommate gone,

how were you going to find a new one?!

jaemin expected your phone call that afternoon and he endured through all your screaming

‘babe, i’m just going to be gone for a year-or two’

‘oR tWO?!’

‘hun, my dad’s injured and his back can only let him do so much. ma’s working too much and i dont have any siblings to help. i figured i could just hold off college until my parents are ready’

ugh, jaemin is such a family boy

‘but jaems! you couldnt have at least told me that yOu wERe mOvING OuT?! and! rent is due soon! i can’t pay for that myself!’

jaemin couldve easily told you to warn yoy

but he didn’t want to tell you bc he couldnt handle you sad and didnt want to upset you

however, now jaemin really understands how shitty that move was

‘tell you what. i’ll pay for this month and make a few phone calls and i’ll get you set up with a new roommate, deal?’

knowing how much of a social butterfly he was, you agreed

ofc you trusted jaemin but part of you feared that he might pair you up with a freak

but he’s not that mean, is he?

you can definitely see renjun doing that but not jaemin

so there you are,,

sitting on your couch alone

without jaemin, your apartment felt really empty

its been a few days since he moved and you were miserable

jaemin hasn’t even texted you about that potential roommate

just as you were about to call him,,

your doorbell rang

you froze and you looked at the time

it was nearing 11 at night and you don’t remember ordering delivery

see,,

if jaemin was here,

he would answer it for you since you would be too scared to do it

but you mustered up your courage and peeped through the peep hole

the man was dressed in all black with a black mask and a black cap with his hood over it with a black hoodie and black pants

ngl, you were terrified and trembling

he rang it again and you jumped

typing out a quick text to jaemin saying ‘hey bub, if i don’t text you in an hour, that means ive been kidnapped so call the police’

you grabbed a pan from the cupboard and gulped before you opened the door

thinking he would just walk forward and grab you, you closed your eyes and raised your pan over your head and swung

a shriek from in front of you made your eyes snap open and found the guy on the floor with a fetal position

you both just froze for like a phat minute

snapping back to reality, you held the pan in front of you

‘if youre going to kidnap me, i got a pan and im not afraid to hit you with it!’

you tried to sound intimidating but your voice was shaking so much

the guy stood up and he took off his hat and the mask to reveal a blonde haired kid

okay, so you were sHOokETh

damn! this boy is fine!

he gave you a shaky smile and held out his hand

‘hi! i’m lee jeno! you must be y/n? jaemin told me you had an opening for a roommate?’

now you noticed the two duffle bags at the side

the embaressment and the shame settled in slowly and you found yourself burning up

nodding, you motioned him to come in

jeno awkwardly walked in and was amazed at how big the layout was with the low rent

‘yea, its kinda hard to believe that we only pay that much. at first i thought there was a ghost in here and that’s why its so cheap’

you tried to make small conversation but laughed weirdly at jeno’s slightly terrified face

‘no! there really is not ghost here! ive lived here for a year and there hasnt been anything so please dont understand! please be my roommate!’

you begged and jeno thought you were weird

but jaemin was right, you were weirdly adorable in a way

so that’s how you and jeno became apartment buddies!

now onto the good stuff!

so, jeno is a vv clean guy

like he’s the type to just pick up a wrapper in the street and throw it in the garbage

so naturally, he likes to keep the apartment as tidy and neat as possible

but you being a mess you are,

you usually leave a lot of things everywhere

lets just say you have a short memory

‘oh? how did that get there?’

eventually, jeno gets sick of it and he confronts you with it

ofc you understand and you actually try to be better

since jeno is literally the most perfect roommate

maybe even better than jaemin

(but don’t tell him that)

jeno is the type to re-stock the pantry with snacks and the fridge with ice cream

since youre both college students, ramen is practically always available in the house 24/7

he also makes the coffee every morning since he works early and wakes up first

even though he doesn’t like the drink and prefers milk, he still notices how you survive off of coffee

babie likes to pick you up some iced americano while he gets a frappe

you on the other hand,,

you’re very surprised

when you got to bed after showing jeno around,

you messaged jaemin

ofc he was worried af and was blowing up your phone

‘WHAT?!’

‘bitch answer the damn phone!’

‘whatthe fuck is happening?!’

‘i need to know if you’re still alive!’

‘oh fuck i shouldnt have moved out’

smiling softly at how worried he was, you responded to him

‘you hoe, it hasnt been an hour yet so chillax. i’m alive, unfortunately, and i just met my new roommate. again, thanks for the heads-up. youre so bad at those. i literally thought he was a burgular or a kidnapper. but he seems chill and emo. just my type.’

but jeno is F A R from C H I L L

oh my goodness,,

hes a crackhead

theres this sound he makes when he’s confused and you couldnt figure out if its cute or weird or if he’s doing this on purpose or thats just how he is

you and him basically communicate with memes

sometimes, at the weird hours at night, he sends you a dumbass meme

you cant help but snort 

also, you promised to take jaemin out to dinner to repay him for the great roommate

‘hes literally one of the best people youll ever meet. it just so happen he needed a place to sleep. now you owe me’

hes a science major while you were a computer major

he basically brings home weird stuff to analyze and it just hella stinks

but hes considerate enough to actually put it outside

whenever he’s focused, he talks to himself or the thing he’s analyzing

‘okay mr. fishy. your scales are really big and its bigger than average’

its so cute

oof also!

jeno doesnt have a job yet he always makes rent on time with extra money to spare

he even sometimes buys you stuff saying, ‘they reminded me of you’

for your birthday, he bought you a pearl necklace that mustve costed thousands

at first, you thought he was a chaebol or smth

which you wouldve been vv jealous of bc youre a struggling college student who works at the coffee shop

but, you were answered when you caught him walking in half-dazed and half-asleep with cuts all over his face

it was like 2 in the morning and you were pulling an all-nighter for some project and wanted to get a glass of water

but here he is, hood up, lip busted, black eye, cheek cut

you shrieked and ushered him to sit on the dining chair

thinking he got mugged or something, you start drilling him questions

‘hun, if you were beat up, we need to call the police! this is illegal!’

but jeno chuckles and brushes the stray hairs out of your face as you tend to his lip

‘pls dont. if you do, ill be broke and i wont have money to pay rent then i cant be your roommate anymore’

cue confused y/n

‘wUT?’

‘if i dont make money, youll kick me out and youll have to find another roommate. i dont want you to go through that hassle again’

ofc you were flattered that even during this situation, hes still thinking about you

‘how is this making money?!’

‘i cant believe youre oblivious to so many things. i thought for sure youve caught on.’

more confusion

‘eXCUse mE, lEE JEno? since when have you started coming home with all these things in your face?’

you were worried that this wasnt the first time this happened

but if you think hard about it, thats why he always wears his mouth masks and he always has his blonde fringe down and sometimes wears sunglasses even though its cloudy outside

‘ohmygod lee jeno are you in a gang?!’

jeno was shocked that you came to that conclusion but laughed at how adorable you were rn

with your wide eyes and mouth open

‘nah, bro. i box. its the only way i can make easy money.’

‘but,,, why did you hide this from me? if you needed money i couldve helped you’

he looked at you skeptically

‘sis, you could barely afford that muffin the other day’

lee jeno now looked different from the jeno you met the first day

What you thought to be an innocent little squish was a fighter at night

‘yah, can-um-you need to take this off’

you mumbled while tugging on his sweatshirt

he nodded and slipped it off

he explained why he came late when he first moved

‘i had a late night match and yknow,, school and all, i barely had enough time to come'

as you dab the wound, you try to make small talk to distract yourself

 ‘so,, youve been boxing this whole time?’

you asked, trying not to get distracted to the way his tight shirt clung to him, showing his defined body

there were bruises up and down his arms and his knuckles were busted

‘yea. i have been since senior high. gotta make money, yknow?’

‘but jen, you can work in coffee shops or at local bookstores. its not worth seeing you busted up like this’

your lips trembled at the thought of him being beaten up too hard to the point he gets into a coma

jenos eyes widened at your wobbling lips and he softly cupped your face

‘hey, im okay and ill be fine. you dont have to worry about me. i usually win, anyways’

his confidence made you chuckle

‘i trust you, lee jeno. just make sure to make it home to me every night.’

‘i know you do and i will. always.”

ever since then,

youve become his little caretaker

youve informed jaemin of what hes been doing and he knew but didnt want you to judge him immediately

smh, jaemin really sucks at informing people

but jeno tries to help you keep up

he even sends you texts that hes fighting that night and your little ‘fighting!’ always makes him smile

his manager and friend, chenle, noticed that hes starting to smile more

chenle likes boxing and wants to be a part of it but doesnt want to be hurt

so,, what better to be the manager of his friend

‘yah, hyung. what’s got you giggly today?’

jeno pointed to the screen and giggled at the little good luck gif you sent

his eyes turned to crescents and chenle smirked

‘wah, you like her, don’t you?’

at the mention of ‘like’, his smile dropped and he shook his head

‘no. of course not. shes just a friend.’

chenle being chenle,,

he continues to prod

‘okay. so every night, you make it your priority to make sure you’re home by 2 in the morning for your friend’

smh, chenle youre so annoying

but hes so right

ever since you caught him,

hes been making sure he gets home at the same time 

he sends you a text that hes on his way and you set your ringtone at a very high volume so you wake up and take care of him

during fights, he makes it his sole mission to make out of this alive and a winner for you

but that never crossed his mind as his feelings for you

he just thought of it as making you not worry for him

but then, he starts to think about your stupid little habits

the way you make this face whenever you dont understand

or when you still leave little post-it notes everywhere with ideas you come up with

he noticed it all and he loves them

‘hOLy ShIT!’

that night was when he realized his feelings for you and he was so dedicated on finishing it that he quickly won and he dashed home with his money

bursting through the door, you looked at him with wide and startled eyes

‘what’s wrong?’

you came running but he scooped you up to a hug

ok you were confused but relieved that he was home and alright

jeno looked at your face and wanted to confess but chickened out at the sight of you

you were so good to him and honestly, he doesnt deserve you

(his thoughts, not mine)

‘i-i’

he stuttered and you motioned him to continue

‘i won!’

he shouted and you congratulated him, even though he literally won all the time

guiding him to the chair, you began to dab his cuts

(dab that bitch)

‘im starting to think that your opponents either really suck or youre like the god of boxing’

he didnt know how to take that but blushed red at the mention of him being a ‘god of boxing’

‘nah, im just good’

you eyed him and smiled

he continued to watch you heal him and inspected your face

heavy eyebags and sunken cheeks, it mustve been a long night

he felt a pang in his chest thinking that you push your stuff away just to help him

‘you dont have to keep doing this for me, yknow’

you halt and look at him seriously

‘i know i dont. but i cant sleep at night thinking youre in pain and alone when i can be there for you’

even though he just realized it, jeno was pretty sure he fell in love with you a long time ago

but if it was possible, he fell in love with you even more

‘thank you’

his soft voice filled the silence and you vowed that you will always be there for him whenever he needs help

a few days later, jeno hasnt been to a fight

sure you were worried at what was going on in his head but partly relieved that you dont have to see him so battered anymore

but this was so un-jeno

just as you were about to talk to him about it, he announces he got a job at the bookstore down the street

‘huh? i thought you didnt want to work’

you question while he looked sheepish

‘i realized that i was starting to become a burden since you take care of me every time. so i thought i should quit and get a regular job. besides, it doesnt hurt as much’

he laughed but you didnt react

‘lee jeno, you gave up boxing and the money,,, for me?’

he nervously looked up at you and you noticed the redness of his cheeks

‘i-well-if you put it that way’

‘listen to me, im flattered and i truly love that you dont want to get beaten up anymore. but i dont want you to quit something you like because of me'

‘but you always take care of me and push your priorities away to clean me up. i dont do anything in return and i dont think its fair!’

he argued and a soft smile crept up your face

‘yah, lee jeno'

your voice became a whisper

‘it doesnt matter to me if you dont do anything in return bc i dont see this as a favor. you are mine to take care of and i will do anything for you, you understand that?’

he looked at you in shock after hearing your response

he also turned red at the mention of him being yours

‘so-but-i dont think-'

he stutters but you place your hands on his arms making him stop

‘all i ask is you to come back home, to come back to me'

by now, yall were blushing

even though it might not sound like it,

but yall just indirectly confessed to each other

yall stared at the ground and jeno looks up, biting his lip

‘hey, y/n, can i make it up to you with some coffee?’

your head darted up and looked at him with wide eyes

‘like-like a date?’

it came out suddenly and you stepped back in surprise, cursing yourself

but jeno chuckled, eyes scrunching cutely

‘it'll be one of many'

lmao i didnt really like this but i made it at 2 in the morning and i kinda like boxer!jeno

[dengswei]

(1/4) mmmm okay omg i hadn’t thought about this when i sent the message hahah. 1) i think i’d like to go to an amusement park with jaebeom and yugyeom because based on the hard carry eps they seem like they like extreme activities (i mean the dudes literally went skydiving) and i need some partners like that in case i chicken out lol. maybe we’d bring jackson along bc he’s a coward lol. 2) going shopping with bam yes i agree!!!! i'd like to have jinyoung there too. i love his style

(2/4) he dresses simply but it works really well. i’d like to see if he’d let me choose outfits for him as well. 3) i’d love to cook with jinyoung as well, but i’m gonna pick jaebeom for this one too (biased much?). he knows how to cook but he’s a korean food supremacist so i’d like to show him western dished he’d love. maybe he’d teach me how to cook his favorite korean dishes, so it’d be a win win situation(¾) 4) i agree with you about bringing yugyeom over to a concert. i’d like youngjae to come as well bc he’d be singing along beautifully while i scream my lungs out. we’d film videos and you’d be able to hear me howling, youngjae harmonizing and yugyeom dancing his as* off. 5) play board games with mark and jackson, definitely. they give me competitive vibes lmao. imagine beating jackson? he’d be so angry i love the thought(4/4) okay so now let’s do something different now. i see that you stan a lot of groups, and i’m looking to spice up my playlists… have you got any recs (kpop or otherwise) for me?? i accept lists, songs, artists, rants about any groups that you love lol feel free to go off in the reply 😉 – secret santa 🎅🏼

i agree with everything you said omg yes taking youngjae to a concert just to hear him singing sounds like THE BEST idea, jaskdsdlsds jackson loosing omg why didn’t i think of that 

you gotta strap yourself up tight for this because do i have recs of course i do, i’ll put it under the cut for length reasons lmao

better day by 100%— the reason why i recommend this song is because this was their first comeback after a 2 year hiatus and boy did they come to fight, they were telling top media that they weren’t going anywhere, that they couldn’t silence them any longer, it was a new start for baekpo and boy did it work in their favour after so long not hearing from them they came back with a bop that not only never gets old but also showcases their vocals 

too very so much by myname — ever need a song to just brighten up your mood? something that’s light hearted, and just a great song to act silly and dance around too? this is that song, plus the mv is silly & cute too 

why by onf — this song became my most played song in 2019 which is a bit of a shock given that it topped 100%’s still loving you & onf’s we must love that were released earlier in the year. why as a mv continues the story of we must love and that part where wyatt starts rapping oof still not over it 

here i am by victon — i can’t put into words what exactly it is that i love about this song but i knew from the second i heard it that it would be one of my favourite songs of all time, maybe it’s the vocals, or their message that they’re conveying through their lyrics & emotions even though i haven’t yet looked up the translation

i also really just recommend these 4 groups as a whole 

rise by taemin — there has yet to be a song that has shocked me (in a good way) as much as this song did, it starts off really simply and how any song would but that moment it hits the chorus damn, he didn’t have to snap that hard but he did we gotta appreciate that

some honourable mentions that i just really love or thought deserve more love:

our dawn is hotter than day by seventeen are you ready? by d-crunchnot that type by gugudanwhat by dreamcatcherdumb by bvnditremember by 100% freesm by hashtagempty by jung daehyun feat jaehan (from spectrum)timeless… by nct ukilling me by ikononly u by imfactsketch u by 100%i’m sorry by vavthe loneliest girl from the carole & tuesday soundtrackdo you feel me by mr. mr. super special (acoustic ver.) by veriveryfeel special by twice sandglass by the heal (wanna one subunit) excuses by next/nex7my life by qian zhenghao (it’s listed as 由我 by 钱正昊 on spotify just in case lmao)electric kiss by exoi’m not over you by ryeowookreminisce about all by onewethe truth is by 100% baby i’m sorry by myname

i’m stopping here before i recommend my whole music library 😂

[ts-crossroads]

Episode Two - “Tumblr Survivor Don’t Want Me To Live” - Julia

A legend DIED today wtf. I miss Rhone and we weren’t even on the same tribe. I know last confession I was like oh Rhone didn’t vote for me in Themyscira he can go to tribal bye but NOW I feel HORRIBLE!!! He actually went home!!! I didn’t think he was gonna go home!!! Fuck!!!

OMG WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT RHONE ALWAYS GETTING BAD PLACEMENTS !!! 1 rip my baby and 2 I’m a fucking fortune teller, future predictor, queen of the past and future castaway

Rhone getting voted out? Fucking fantastic! One of the stronger vets coming into this, in my opinion, and also probably one of the only few people I didn't get to speak to, at length, during One World. Bye Bye Rhone! 

Okay so like bitch. I really am tryna not be a messy bitch already butttt Rebecka is being one so its triggering me to be one. Like girl i ain't got time for that bs. Not to mention she and Rhone wanted to flip on me? Good that their asses aren't a thing anymore lmao! But anyways, pray bc im tryna not be a mess

Thanks to my strategy, we dominated the first Immunity Challenge. When Optio realized that Fatum and Imperium had teamed up, it was too late for them to do anything about it. I'm not crying, though- the only person on that tribe I felt a connection with was Jake, and he survived Tribal. In addition to allowing us to win, my strategy revealed a lot of interesting information. For instance, before I could even mention working with Fatum specifically, Bryan had ALREADY begun talking to Emily about teaming up. https://imgur.com/cd5ebDW First of all, this shows me that Bryan feels very comfortable with Emily- who isn't even on our tribe- and also that Emily was playing me. Hard. From talking to Autumn and Chris, it sounds like she's dominating Fatum with her social game, and she tried to work her charm on the rest of us, too. Someone that manipulative is going to be dangerous down the road, and make it more likely that Bryan will flip on us when we swap. Autumn, Chris and I seem to be on the same page, and Chris and I are working on convincing Dane that Autumn is a non-entity so he'll be more open to her working with us. Dane thinks the trio is himself, Chris, and me, but in reality, he's the loose 4th number that I won't hesitate to cut if necessary. The working alliance name is Nancy Drew and the Hardy Boys. That's important. https://pictures.abebooks.com/isbn/9780671502904-us.jpg At this point, I feel pretty good about the way things are going. I've got a total cross-tribal bromance with Johnny going on (#FratBrosAlliance), a solid threesome-plus-one on my tribe, and it doesn't sound like Sam or Bryan have tried to form an alliance at all. They better pray we win immunity, because this game is heating up.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DaryPBAz_Pk

WOW OKAY. FIRST OF ALL....... Icon me getting an automatic bye in the semi finals of the reward challenge, by simply doing nothing, and then losing horrifically on my first go at the challenge. It's okay! I showed I'm a team player by not playing for the storyteller for next round, and our tribe didn't win anything for reward in particular, which didn't bother me at all, because that means that no one on our tribe looks particularly good, and we all are on a level playing ground, which is good strategically from my perspective. Now, heading into post reward challenge, which is the more ICONIQUE part of my night..... I go to search for the idol, and it's the first round, so very meh, the odds of finding ANYTHING are typically not in my favor... rt? NOT RIGHT!! NOT RIGHT AT ALL!!!!! [12/13/17, 11:11:39 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): You open the book to the marked page. The prologue has ended, and you turn the page. “Chapter One,” it reads, “At Castle Crossroads.” Immediately, the world around you shifts. You find yourself standing in a dimly lit hallway. Lit torches line the walls, and surrounding you are two large doors. What would you like to do? You can… 1. Continue down the hall. 2. Take the left door. 3. Take the right door. 4. Take a torch from the wall. 5. Cry out for help. [12/13/17, 11:17:19 PM] ~~Johnny~~: hmm [12/13/17, 11:17:53 PM] ~~Johnny~~: I really wanna see what happens if I choose option Five [12/13/17, 11:18:03 PM] ~~Johnny~~: But the SMART version of Johnny is telling the dumb version of Johnny not to choose that option [12/13/17, 11:18:11 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): do whatever you want :) [12/13/17, 11:18:17 PM] ~~Johnny~~: watch crying out for help mean an idol gets put in my hand [12/13/17, 11:18:18 PM] ~~Johnny~~: fuck it [12/13/17, 11:18:20 PM] ~~Johnny~~: it’s round one [12/13/17, 11:18:22 PM] ~~Johnny~~: it’s all luck [12/13/17, 11:18:25 PM] ~~Johnny~~: I’m gonna cry out for help [12/13/17, 11:18:44 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): Your calls are soon answered by the most handsome man you have ever seen in your entire life! “Hi,” he says. “I’m Sir Nestor.” What’s your name? You introduce yourself, and he grabs your hand, shaking it firmly. “What did you come here for?” You have two options - profess your undying love for this beautiful man and claim to have come here to woo him and take his hand in marriage, or, try to play it cool and make him jealous, claiming you are here for the Ball, and a chance to meet the Prince. [12/13/17, 11:19:09 PM] ~~Johnny~~: oof [12/13/17, 11:19:20 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): I know [12/13/17, 11:19:20 PM] ~~Johnny~~: one will probably mean that he grabs me tight and gives me an idol [12/13/17, 11:19:27 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): that's what I said when I saw sir nestor too [12/13/17, 11:19:27 PM] ~~Johnny~~: Another would mean that if I play it cool, he might say fuck off [12/13/17, 11:19:48 PM] ~~Johnny~~: So I think the safer option is to profess my undying love for this beautiful man [12/13/17, 11:19:55 PM] ~~Johnny~~: as if anything that I’m saying makes any logical sense [12/13/17, 11:20:01 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): gdgdfsgd [12/13/17, 11:20:03 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): one sec [12/13/17, 11:21:02 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): Sir Nestor is flattered. “I’m sorry, but my heart belongs to another,” he discloses. “But I owe you for the piece of your heart I have stolen.” He grabs your hand again and presses something small and wooden into it. “Take this for safe keeping.” He winks at you and walks away, into the darkness. [12/13/17, 11:21:19 PM] ~~Johnny~~: uhm [12/13/17, 11:21:21 PM] ~~Johnny~~: excuse me? [12/13/17, 11:22:55 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): Sir Nestor has given you half of a hidden immunity idol! This half of Sir Nestor's heart can be combined with any other idol half to make a hidden immunity idol. These halves can be obtained in numerous ways - you will have to find them! [12/13/17, 11:23:03 PM] ~~Johnny~~: OMG [12/13/17, 11:23:04 PM] ~~Johnny~~: STFU [12/13/17, 11:23:07 PM] ~~Johnny~~: I found a half of one? [12/13/17, 11:23:09 PM] ~~Johnny~~: I’m dying LISTEN READERS!! I KNOW THAT'S A LOT TO READ, BUT FFS PLEASE READ WHAT JUST HAPPENED. I chose "Cry for Help" and "Profess undying love for strange man" and got half an idol! THIS IS FUCKING FANTASTIC!! Now... on a serious note. Having half an idol is huge for a lot of ways. For starters, I am definitely not telling anyone I have this half of an idol. I learned last season from my Steffen incident, and I know that there's no chance in hell I can share this information with anyone. I am, of course, going to try to go for the idol every single round, in hopes of finding the other half, but I now, more than ever, need to play a super strong social game, but not delve into strategy talk (Thanks Andrew for that piece of advice) and just keep it purely social, and let people bring up things like "I trust you" and "I get good vibes from you" so that way they can maybe feel more comfortable telling me about the idol. This gives me a lot of leverage early on in the game, and I'm pretty stoked, but I've gotta keep it cool. As for not participating in the immunity challenge. I see there being no upside to competing for several reasons. First off, I said over and over I'd compete if someone else wanted to sit out, which shows that I'm willing to compete, and also, if we win, I'm immune and didn't have to do much work for the challenge, meanwhile if we lose, there's likely going to be a member of our tribe who didn't do as much, and it's going to be easier to divert attention on that person. I'm thinking I'm safe if we lose, but I honestly don't believe my connections are as strong as they can be, so I'm going to really have to pick that up the best I can, but I do feel confident in my relationships with Ryan, Haley and John. I know Haley likes Emily, so that can maybe give me an in there. I see Nicole being first out of our tribe. She doesn't seem the most active, so I've got faith in that being the vote if we lose still. I know I keep talking about who I would vote over and over again in these confessionals, but it's always a thought in my head, and rightfully so, because eventually this game is going to pick up entirely, and it's going to be chaos.

I have 2 scavenger hunts in 2 games this week and I just want rhone back what the actual FUCK I was so excited to meet/play with rhone

Anyone who disagrees with me on Hanukkah is racist CONFIRMED 

Not to be that bitch but if my tribe loses after I drank jelly, jam, maple syrup, and Olive Garden dressing all together I’m going to McFreakin lose it! Also I did 30/36 things? If my tribe doesn’t pull their weigh I’m going to scream. Like I’m screaming. Some of them are talking about only having like ten things done and I’m like ????????? WHAT

Sooooo we lost the challenge, which is exactly what I was anticipating. I knew that this challenge was going to be one we were going to lose, because our tribe didn't give a half of a shit in terms of effort, and it kinda pisses me off, but now we're headed to tribal in the second round, and I think i'm partially ready for it. I knew that Ryan, John and Haley have all been pretty tight, and it should've been pretty simple in knowing that we were going to choose between Emily and Nicole, but then the LOVELY twist of the best scoring player from our tribe bringing a member from the winning tribe to tribal council is NOT bueno. Emily decided to bring over Bryan, which was an interesting choice. Honestly, I don't think Bryan being here or not being here will make an impact on tribal council, and I know the conversations I'm having right now with him are pussy footing around almost, and I'm trying not to make it seem too casual, because I can tell he's fed up with the small talk and wants to know what's happening with tribal council. APPARENTLY, according to Haley and John, is that Emily has admitted to both of them that she enjoys talking to Ned and Bryan more than she spoke to us, so like BUH BYE BITCH!! I tried to bring up the counter argument that Nicole is probably going to be detrimental in challenges when it comes to effort, compared to Emily, because Emily seems to care a lot more, but in a smaller cast, with an inevitable swap coming very soon, we can't keep around Emily, when she has way closer relationships on the other tribes, and we'll almost rather take a loss in a challenge with Nicole, than a few wins and bringing Emily into a swap, where she might screw us. On top of all of this, I know my social game couldn't possibly be as strong as it could be this time around, considering Emily didn't trust me with the information of her talking to other tribes more than us, which she did tell John and Haley, so this means I've really just gotta watch out and make sure my name isn't the name that is being brought up today for the potential vote from Emily. I think Nicole is going to be on board with voting with us too, to get rid of Emily, so I've gotta do a bit of talking to her today to make sure that Nicole feels some loyalty to me, and will feel closer to me after this vote, than hopefully the other people on our tribe, and then I've gotta talk to Emily and just make sure that my name isn't the name she plans on throwing out there. I think she's going to throw out Ryan's name, but who knows. Only in due time of tribal council will we find out.......

SOOOOOOOOO an alliance was made called the "The Stoners" which is actually my favorite alliance of all time, and I couldn't be happier with the title of it. The title alone just makes me want to trust them whole heartedly until the game is over. jkjkjk on a serious note NOW So the alliance is pretty damn perfect if you ask me. I have the three people I trust most in the game so far, and that's Ryan, John and Haley, and being in an alliance with them is good. I trust them, and I'm always pretty nervous going into a tribal council, but I do think we'll be fine this round, and I'm just going to try to make my name not come up at a tribal. My social game could be better, but i've gotta make it stronger with nicole and emily. AS FOR THE IDOL SEARCH THOUGH: Last time we spoke about my idol searches, I FOUND, check that out, FOUND half an idol on my first try, and I was like HOW DID I DO THAT WTF!! So then I decided to search again, and I ended up going down the main hall, and down the stairs, and I found a witch, and she asked me to play a game! [12/15/17, 9:51:18 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): You walk down the stairs and find yourself in a dark, damp room - presumably the dungeon. You hear a noise up ahead - it seems to be a chain dragging along the ground. Cautiously, you walk ahead into the darkness, and come upon a jail cell. Inside is a tiny man dressed like a jester. “Hello,” he says, surprised to see you. “My name is Mervyn. I’ve been down here a while… Would you like to play a game?” [12/15/17, 9:54:47 PM] ~~Johnny~~: Hmmm [12/15/17, 9:54:54 PM] ~~Johnny~~: Do I have to say yes or no? [12/15/17, 9:55:18 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): fkjadshjf yeah [12/15/17, 9:55:32 PM] ~~Johnny~~: Okay. I'll say yes [12/15/17, 9:56:08 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): ok so here is what will happen [12/15/17, 9:56:15 PM] Owen (Crossroads Host): “Excellent!” Mervyn exclaims. “It’s been a long while since I’ve had some entertainment. Here is how this will work: I am hiding a coin in my left hand or right hand. If you can guess the correct hand three times in a row, you win! I’ll give you three attempts. Understood?” I lost the game, unfortunately, but IMAGINE if I won, it may have been the other half of that idol, and I would've been tripping my balls off, but I didn't find it, so I decided to try to gain some favor, and this may have been a HUGE mistake, but I get this feeling that this makes Haley, who is playing the game pretty hard, trust me more than she trusts John and Ryan. So I told her the exact path I took, and I told her that she had to play the game, try to win. I alsooooooo may or may not have decided to tell John too. I think this level of transparency that I can have with John and Haley this early is good. I'm definitely going to have to tell Ryan too, in hopes that one of them gets the half an idol, and tells me. At this point, I'm giving them a huge piece of information in this game, and I think they'll be thankful later, and maybe even secretly tell me that they found the other half of the idol that I'm looking for, that they don't know I have. I know this may be a flashback from Japan, but I've got a pretty decent vibe from these three, and at least knowing that Emily doesn't have it is just a step better than anything else, so I'll take that as a moral victory for now, and hope I'm the one who beats the game to get beyond the "Win."

ummm so wow thank god we won this challenge i was so nervous with bran literally ghosting like the fuck??? so after tribal bran told me that he wanted to get close with rebecka, and ended up making a chat with me, him and her. and then the next day brandon made a chat with me, him, and julia. Lmfao king of being in the middle?? well maybe im boo boo the fool and don't know! but...I don't trust Rebecka? She literally just voted me. So Bran isn't thinking that much, plus he told me he doesn't trust Brandon, who literally saved my ass.,.,.ok. Brandon told me the TEA which is that Julia was talking to him A LOT about saving Rebecka if we lose. It seems like she's close with her, prob bc they're both girls and that worries me. Like this heaux literally tried to send my ass packing obv if she wanted to target someone it would be me again so she can get less blood on her hands. She worries me, she went HAM in the immunity obv to get back into our good graces, so I'm kinda nerv. Also bc if we survive to a tribe swap and end up on the same tribe she'd prob try to throw me under the bus so fast LMAO. I told Brandon that he was my ride or die, I trust him the most. I rly hope he doesn't try to fuck me over in the future. I'm also worried about the idol cus if everyone's being honest then me, Brandon, and Julia don't have it. If Becky has that gaddamn idol then im fuckd. 

YAYYYY, I’m so glad my tribe won the immunity challenge! We are really doing that! And Emily brought me over to her tribe for the vote! That’s awesome! I get to expand my social game too now and be more prepared if a tribe swap were to happen. The thing is. These people are so boring. I have not heard one fucking name the whole time I’ve been here. And I’ve literally been asking for one. They all say everyone is so nice. And they don’t wanna vote anyone off. Pft. Whatever AutumnI’m so blessed/ this tribe is amazing!!! It all came together and we did that. Also shoutout to Ned cause he killed it and wow what a lad #thatsmyally . Meanwhile I got into Athena All Stars so guess who gets to flop in yet ANOTHER scavenger hunt 🙃 I have neither the time nor the WiFi to pull off all these fucking photos and videos. I had 10 points worth of stuff that just never submitted because WiFi but I’m on Imperium sooo I’m nervous though because I feel like we’re literally the Healers tribe from Season 35 and I think we’re only gonna lose 1 person before merge, especially if we keep winning. Basically I need us to start losing so Opossum and Fart don’t take us out in the merge simply because we’re Impartial lol

Okay so Ned, Chris, and I formed an alliance and I’m really happy because I need numbers so badly in this game. However, when I went on call with Ned I noticed he was very hesitant to talk game with Chris and I so I’m scared that he’s playing both sides. Also we’ve all been working together to map out the storybook but I feel like I’m the only one that actually gives them step by step instructions on what I did and it’s pissing me off because I really want to get an idol. Now, for the rest of the tribe. During the one world interactions and the first immunity challenge Bryan and Emily formed a bond and that’s why our tribes teamed up on Optio, but I’m starting to get real sketch about him since she also picked him to come over and view their tribal council. Whenever I talk to Bryan he’s so boring and I think it’s because he doesn’t think that I’m useful to his game and that he’s only going to be super friendly whenever he needs me. But with that being said if he feels comfortable on my tribe then he thinks he has the majority and thats why it ties back into Ned. I really think Ned and Bryan are low key working together but I’m not going to let my paranoia get the best of me in this game. I just have to really work on Autumn and get closer with Chris. 

Me when I’m about to get blindsided hard. Just an observation. omg if I got 17th I’d quit the community SORRY SORRY. Mini mental breakdown that i get from people not communicating with me and me just going all NFJKDLSNVJKDSFNJLKVSDNFJKLNSDVFJKLN Okay I’m having a good conversation with Emily. She won’t target me. cool tbh I’d rather Nicole go a bit now, but I don’t wanna sound indecisive in my confessional, or ruffle feathers with my tribemates, so I’m just going to go with this and hope for the best, even though I'm sounding pretty indecisive now. Rip Emily, she seems like she wants to be here pretty bad too. This is not what I wanted. Haley wanted this, and that little lady is playing very hard for a rookie, which is fine for me partly, but also a bit concerning because I don't want her to be in the position to just call the shots and me potentially be a shot she's calling, but I'm hoping for the best for the future and thinking this may be a decent move for me EEK IDK

And the winning streak continues! The reward challenge was great. We decided to split the challenges with 3 of us playing for Storymaster and 3 playing for immunity advantage. I was put into the Storymaster challenge (Knight Moves) with Chris and Autumn, and our only competition was Julia... who left before the challenge even started. So we played amongst ourselves and had Alliance Bonding Time (TM), where Chris eventually won. Also, Bryan won the advantage for our immunity challenge, which we didn't really need because everyone put in a ton of work and we won in a landslide (even with Chris's disadvantage from the Storybook as well as him being sick all day). The alliances are going great. Chris and I have an alliance with Dane (called Wassup Homies) and one with Autumn (called Mystery Inc. I'm Fred, Chris is Shaggy, and Autumn is Daphne). Now Chris and I need to work on stealthily merging the two alliances into one, but it's looking like we're in a good spot at the moment. In addition, I found a challenge advantage in the Storybook, which Dane tried to convince me to play last night. Dude, try to make it a LITTLE less obvious when you want to flush my advantage, because now I'm not sure I can trust you. Dane, keep that hug *boop* for me. Cuz it wasn't real. http://oi53.tinypic.com/vg6kcn.jpg Now here's where Bryan screwed up. Again. Because Fauna lost immunity, the person on their tribe who scored the highest gets to kidnap someone from another tribe, where they will cast a vote but be immune. The winner of this advantage happened to be Emily, and it was no surprise who she chose: Bryan. https://media.giphy.com/media/xT0xeQ3Qqmf2ZZ9rQk/giphy.gif So Bryan's obviously going to get pulled into Emily's alliance, where he'll learn ALL about the relationships and goings-on at Faulty, which will set him up REAL nicely for a swap or merge. If he doesn't spill all the Faculty secrets as soon as he gets back to camp, I'm strongly considering throwing the next challenge to vote him out, because letting Bryan reach a swap is a risk I'm not willing to take. SamanthaI’m glad I’m on a tribe that keeps winning but that makes me nervous bc there is little strategy going on, and if we merge without having a tribal, we are fucked. I may be getting ahead of myself with the merge thing, but my tribe is kicking ass. I sat out of this comp though so I really can’t take much credit. I am nervous about how close Bryan and Emily are. Bryan was the one who talked to Emily about having our tribes work together and then she won a reward allowing her to borrow Bryan for their tribal. If they’re both around when we merge, that is definitely a duo to split. I also love Chris. We snap all the time and he’s so funny and kind! I think I want to work with him. And we were talking about people on the tribe and we both think autumn is on the bottom. I haven’t talked to autumn since the first night which is not good at all hahaha. I really like Ned, we have a lot in common. I didn’t realize that in our previous game, and I know I have Dane. We have been friends for so long. I think we can easily work together. Autumn and Bryan are the only ones I’m worried about, but overall I think theyre fine for now. I’m really interested to see what happens at tribal. I wonder how the other tribes see us. I know fantum probably hates us but oh well :) I want to do a lot of idol searching this game. I’m tired of never having idols, I get them so rarely, I’m determined this game.  

So Emily can't talk to me. She will ask John "how's Ryan doing in the challenge" etc etc all this shit. Like my PMs are OPEN. Haley and John both told me I was being targeted by Emily for tribal which idrc. Nicole said "I haven't heard anything" after we agreed to not vote each other and I think she's being a lil FAKER. But the stoner alliance of Haley/Me/John/Johnny should HOPEFULLY stick together and get Emily out.... 

Yay we won woohoo im still fuckin pissed that bran failed to complete a single scavenger hunt number???? How did we not lose like whatever i can't I'm just glad I'm safe this week !!! 

At the beginning of the round Haley and I finally went on call and we really clicked once we were able to really talk to one another. One of the things she brought up was that if we lost she thinks Emily should go first because she had so many connections to the other tribes, which she has openly admitted to. She said she wanted an alliance with me and Ryan, and a few days later a chat was made with myself ryan Haley and Johnny. We lost by just a few points on the scavenger hunt which definitely stings a bit, but what is even worse is that Emily killed it for our tribe on that challenge. Haley immediately threw Emily's name out in our alliance chat, and everyone seems to think it's the best thing to do for us going forward. If we swap we don't know if Emily will be more loyal to us than to the others. Bryan being on the tribe makes it complicated as he is deff close with Emily. He's automatically taking her side and trying to get ryan to be the person voted out tonight. Nicole seems to be on the fence at this point, I can't tell what she wants to do. I really want to keep nicole close in this game as I love her but I'm worried she won't agree with this decision. I originally wanted to work with her and ryan together but will she vote out Emily? Who knows. A girls alliance was made by Emily once we lost the challenge, but nicole immediately told me about it. Haley then came to me as well. I feel like people trust me at this point and I don't want to lose that trust. I feel horrible about it but I feel like ryan and Haley are both better for my game going forward. It just stings cause I really like Emily too and would like to continue getting to know her. It's messy but hopefully whatever happens it happens smoothly.

My confessing game is really low I’m sorry. So basically everyone was SKIRTIN around bringing up names and I just casually mentioned that I hadn’t spoken much to Ryan to Haley and she seemed to not be opposed to voting him. I did the same sort of thing to Johnny then he added onto that saying that Ryan is a WINNER and I was like ? Oh! LOL! I’m a winner too but not in a main so I guess it doesn’t count I’m gonna pretend like I’m scared of Ryan just so we’ll go for him and not me :0! And then I talked to Nicole and she also seemed good with voting Ryan and Nicole said she’d talk to John! So everything is good and if things go according to plan, Ryan will be the first boot of the Fatum tribe. I think people are already starting to um? Look at me like a leader? Or a threat? And I’m a bit nervous? But also, they can fear me all they want. Don’t vote me out because I’m big and scary!!! GRRR!!!

This whole cast is cancelled bring back rhone pls 

my social security number is 372-83-1938