#notorious for messing up countries every time

[killedbythegroove]

help why is he like this 😭

courtesy of @prettyinpunk

[just-jordie-things]

[part twelve] to build a home - gojo satoru

word count: 5.1k warnings: !!manga spoilers!! swearing, jjk-verse style fighting series summary: when (y/n) (y/l/n) catches wind that the notorious sorcerer killer, toji fushiguro, has children, she makes it her personal mission to find them. the catch being she couldn't tell a soul about them- the risk of the zen'in clan learning about them was too great. keeping the secret isn't the hard part, it's lying to her friends, shoko ieiri, geto suguru, and of course gojo satoru, that she struggles with. especially when satoru has suddenly become so keen on keeping an eye on her lately.

series masterlist

[part twelve] : “Those Who Regret, Those Who Deflect, and Those Who Defect” ___

Today was Wednesday.

(y/n’s) fingers drummed against the surface of her desk as she stared at the notebook before her.  Today the entire page was filled with notes, but she hadn’t heard a word Yaga spoke as he blathered on with his lesson.  The notes, dates, and ideas she’d written today were to help clear her overworking mind of the mess she’d gotten herself in.

Bus tickets? She wrote in small letters in a clear space in the corner of her page.  She could probably afford two, at the least.  But could she really send two kids off to who knows where?

She quickly crossed out the idea, hoping to forget it completely.  There was nowhere she could send Megumi and Tsumiki that the Zen’in Clan couldn’t find them.

Her eyes flicked up to the front of the class, feigning attention.  There was only twenty minutes of class, if she could just make it that long without getting called out for her lack of participation, then she could bolt out of there and work somewhere in private for the rest of the day.

Fake deaths? She wondered briefly how difficult it would be to fake a death.  If we set fire to the house and flee the country, could that buy some time, at least?

She made a mental note to do a deep dive on how to get away with arson.

To her luck, Yaga had always been more of a lecturer of a teacher than one who encouraged participation.  So as he droned on, it was easy to act as though she were diligently taking notes.  But he was the only one in that classroom that hadn’t noticed (y/n’s) odd behavior.  Or appearance, for that matter.

When she’d arrived, Shoko had already been in her seat, and her quiet greeting died in her throat as she eyed her friend up and down in pure concern.  She’d never seen (y/n) so disheveled.  

Her uniform was wrinkled, and the top few buttons of her collar weren’t even fastened.  Not to mention her hair was clearly unwashed, thrown up with a clip secured at the back of her head- and she didn’t even seem to have the energy to do that properly.  Some strands stuck out awkwardly, and some weren’t even scooped up by the plastic claws of the accessory.

Shoko hadn’t commented on it as she watched (y/n) take her seat and instantly pull out a notebook and pen, as though she had a massive workload to catch up on.  The brown eyed girl chalked it all up to her mission.  She wasn’t even supposed to be back to class today, so she must have been wiped out from the assignment, right?

Even though Shoko decided this must have been the case, she still gnawed on the inside of her cheek with anxiety every time she cast a glance (y/n’s) way during class.  Something in Shoko’s gut told her she wasn’t trying to focus on her studies with the way she scribbled away in fervor.

Satoru had also noticed the storm cloud over (y/n’s) head as soon as he’d shown up to class.  By the time he’d strolled in, his usual whole minute late, she’d already been hard to work in that notebook of hers.  (y/n) wasn’t exactly a stickler for a perfect uniform and appearance, but she was never… messy.

His eyes trailed from the disheveled girl, to Shoko, who was already looking at him with a worried expression.  It clearly told him something was wrong.

Sure, he knew that, he could see that, clear as day.  (y/n) obviously wasn’t trying to hide it.  And sure, seeing her in such a disheveled state was alarming enough to make his sour heart weaken for her.  But when he sat in his seat and noticed Shoko still staring at him, as though asking him to do something, he shrugged his shoulders lamely, and avoided glancing in either of their directions for the rest of the day.

He had other troubles on his mind today, with his best friend being MIA.

It wasn’t surprising to Satoru in the slightest when (y/n) was out of the classroom as soon as Yaga had wrapped up his lesson for the day.

Satoru was next to rush for the door, but was stopped by a short statured Shoko, holding her books to her chest, and staring up at him expectantly, as if she wasn’t the one that got in his way.

He just sighs, and waits for her to speak her piece.

“This is crazy,” She gives in.  “I can’t take all of this anymore.  I mean, with Suguru, with (y/n), I’m going to lose my head” The admission comes out in a sardonic tone, but the look on her face tells him she’s about to cry.

“Shoko, I really don’t want to talk about the rumors.  They’re just rumors” He tells her, and attempts to walk around her, but she’s quick to slide into his way again.

“Fine.  Then let’s talk about (y/n),” She says, placing her hands on her hips.

Satoru fights the urge to groan and throw his head back.  This was the last thing he wanted to do, but if he blew off Shoko he’d only upset her, and he was quickly running out of friends.  So instead of pushing around her- which he could do with ease- he stays put and gives into the uncomfortable conversation.

“Look, she finally talked to me and… and I get it, okay?” Shoko’s voice turns soft with empathy.  “I get that you’re upset, and just so you know, I do not support this either.  I don’t know how she got caught up with the Zen’ins or why but-”

“Woah, backtrack,” Satoru held up his hand, which was enough to silence a now confused Shoko.  His eyes are wide, and every feature of his face unmoving.  Hearing the Zen’in name be brought up in a conversation regarding (y/n) made his blood run cold before freezing altogether.  His mouth dried, cementing in the sour taste of bile.  A minute passes, the two of them standing there staring at each other, each as shocked as the other, and neither knowing what to say now.  “You didn’t just say Zen’ins, right?”

Blinking, her mouth opened to confirm, but as Satoru’s eye twitched with blossoming irritability, Shoko opted to nod her head instead as she fumbled to explain.

“Yeah… I thought… you didn’t know?” She failed to form much of a question at all, her brows furrowing.

“You thought I knew what she was up to!?”

His voice raises, not in anger with the girl in front of him, but with the one that had hidden some seriously detrimental information from him.  Shoko’s flustering in front of him, having believed his fight with (y/n) was about the Zen’ins.  Apparently, her best friend had finally picked up a knack for lying.  Or maybe Shoko really wanted to believe that this time, it was the truth.  Before she gets the chance to start over and explain the whole thing, Satoru’s ranting.

“Hell, Zen’ins?” He mutters, shoving his sunglasses into his hair as he pinches the bridge of his nose.  “What fucking business does she have with them? And why wouldn’t she just come to me for help? God, she’s the most infuriating person, I swear when I find her-”

“Wait, Satoru,” Shoko’s shaking her head, her eyes blown wide in fear.  

And also an unease that pumped straight from her heart and through her veins, realizing she now had to break to him.

“She’s not in trouble,” She says, only furthering Satoru’s confusion.

With his brows drawn together and his lips parted in disgusted confusion, he couldn’t think of a single explanation for how she couldn’t be in trouble.  Business with the Zen’in Clan was certain trouble, that much was common sense.

“She’s…” Shoko starts, but trails off, too upset to be the bearer of bad news.

“She’s what?” Satoru nearly snaps at her, but fights the instinct to do so.

Shoko chews on her lip, wishing now that she’d never approached Satoru.

“She… she told me that this is what your fight was about,” She admits instead.  “And it made sense, I’m so sorry, Satoru, I thought you knew.  I thought she told you”

“Told me what?” He’s not usually one to beg, but he’s ready to get on his knees and plead with Shoko to spit it out already.

His eyes are piercing into hers with an intensity she’d rarely gotten to see up close, and she had to admit, the usual pretty cerulean was intimidating.  Even to her.

“She’s seeing one of them”

It’s a whisper, as though she still couldn’t believe the news, even after almost a week of it keeping her up at night.

Satoru’s so still, she’s not sure he’s even heard her.  He doesn’t so much as blink.  He just stares at her.

Unsurely, and uncomfortably, Shoko clarifies.

“They’re courting her, I suppose,” She says, trying to speak louder, more clearly, but her voice refuses to rise above a whisper.  “I guess for the last couple months-”

“No” 

It’s the only thing Satoru says, and it seems he’s under the same curse, as it comes out under his breath.  He shakes his head in a small motion of disbelief.

He’s reminded of the way it had felt when (y/n) had removed her hex from him, that small but distinct buzz of her cursed energy vanishing at her will.  He remembered feeling empty once it was gone.  As though it had nestled into a spot in his soul, and when she’d removed it, it left not a mark, but a hole.  He’d lied about the sensation, as not to hurt her feelings.  He wonders now if she’d offered the same pleasantry to him, lying so as not to hurt his feelings.  If only she hadn’t been such a shitty liar.

Shoko’s eyes fill with tears as she watches in real time as he processes this information.  Her heart breaks for him.  Her heart breaks with his.

“I’m- I’m so sorry,” She stammers over her apology as tears burn in her throat and eyes.  “I didn’t want to tell you like this- I- I really didn’t know that you-”

“Don’t be sorry,” Satoru cuts her off, his hand grabbing her elbow reassuringly, so that she knew he wasn’t upset with her.  

She knows he means it, but the emotions swirling in his eyes were so bitter, she can’t help but frown.  He’s taken on more bad news than he should have to bear, and she knows he’s strong, the strongest, but even the strongest could only carry so much.  And besides, did being the strongest mean he deserved to take on all of this suffering? Did being the strongest mean he had to take on all of this pain?

“You didn’t know,” He says.  “Thank you, for telling me”

With blurred vision, Shoko nods at him, before hastily wiping the tears from her eyes.

“We got in a fight because she didn’t want to take the Brazil assignment,” He finally confesses.  “She didn’t have a good reason, and (y/n’s) always been a shit liar, so I figured it had to do with, well, that, I guess,” He mutters towards the end, but shakes his head again and keeps going.  “She completely lost it.  I’ve never seen her so mad, and I- I guess I didn’t help, but… but I just…” He sighs, taking the sunglasses off his head so he could run a hand through his hair.

“I know,” Shoko chimed in softly.  “I was worried too”

“Why… why couldn’t she just tell me?” He asked, knowing there wasn’t an answer.  Not one Shoko could give him anyways.

“I mean… it’s not like we’re taking this well” She half-jokes, but even the chuckle she attempts dies in her throat with an awkward croak.

“No, I’m upset, I’m… I’m pissed,” He admits.  “But.. but if way back then she would have just said something…”

“I still would’ve been pissed,” Shoko says with confidence.  “I don’t know who it is she’s seeing, I don’t know any details at all but I don’t need to,” She shrugs her shoulders limply.  “I know she can’t possibly be in love with the guy, I mean-”

Before she can finish her thought, Shoko shuts her mouth immediately.  Satoru didn’t need to hear her opinion on who was or wasn’t right for (y/n).  It wasn’t important now, since she’d made her choice.  

And it was almost as if she could see the heartbreak, the disappointment, and the jealousy in his eyes, mixing into a dangerously depressing cocktail.

“Sorry,” She mumbles sheepishly.  “But… just so you know, I was rooting for you guys,”

Satoru blinks, his expression going blank with perfect precision of his microexpressions.  Shoko and Suguru had spent a lot of time teasing him for the way he spoke about (y/n), or treated her, and sometimes even the way he looked at her.  But he’d never actually admitted the way he’d felt about her, not out loud.

Clearly no matter how much he’d brushed off their comments with an eye roll or a joke, Shoko had seen through the act.

Or maybe she was only saying this now because she could see the way this news was hitting him directly in the heart.  Had he really become so vulnerable, that he would be that easy to read?  Was he really becoming this weak?

Shoko’s eyes are sad as she’s the one to reach out to him now, placing a hand on his shoulder and offering the tiniest of smiles.

“I really thought that you were growing into each other… you know?” She tells him gently.  “She cared- cares,” She corrects herself quickly, and pauses to make sure she doesn’t make a mistake like that again.  “She cares about you a lot, she needs you, you know”

There was a time when hearing this, Satoru might have gotten a little lovesick.  Maybe he would have even done something about it, too.  He could have sworn, somewhere between the playful banter, the nights he spent in her room, the alone time they had started sharing more and more, that she had felt the same way.  He could have sworn.  It couldn’t have all been in his head, it couldn’t have been fabricated, because she was there.

She was there when he took her to breakfast, and they strolled through the shops in Tokyo all day, laughing, chatting, and maybe even flirting.  She was there when he’d wake her from her nightmares, holding her, comforting her, cooing to her until she’d fall back asleep.  She was there for all the banter that ended with a gleam in her eye, for all of the times that he’d peek over to her only to find her eyes already locked on him.  Whether or not she harbored the same feelings for him that he had for her, almost didn’t matter, because when those feelings of his would arise, she was there for it, so she had to feel it on some level, right?

Was it really all just a trick? None of it had been real?

“That’s not what she told me when she told me to fuck off,” He finally grumbles in bitterness.  “I think it’s pretty fuckin’ clear just how much she-”

“Talk to her again” Shoko cut him off, her words quiet, but encouraging.

His brows furrow at her, silently asking her if she’s crazy.

“She doesn’t-”

“Try,” Shoko speaks over him again, pleading now.  “Please, try.  I can’t lose any more friends, Satoru.  I can’t have you two fall apart, it can’t be like this forever,”

A tear slips down her cheek, and Satoru watches as it catches on her jaw and slides to her chin.  By the time it drops, more tears are spilling from her eyes.

“I need us to be okay, I need us to stick together,” She admits, her whimpering voice cracking, but she doesn’t care about keeping her composure anymore.

All she could think about was how this choice (y/n) had made seemed to affect every single one of them, even though she’d chosen to keep it private.  How much it had hurt her, and how much it was hurting Satoru now.  If Suguru were here, Shoko was sure he would be upset about this predicament as well.  The privacy, the lies, it only made things worse.  Shoko didn't know where she stood with her anymore.

“We’re best friends,” Shoko mumbles.  “Right?”

Satoru nods, and pulls her hand from his shoulder, only to reach his arms out and hug her tightly.  Shoko wrapped her own arms around him in the same motion, clinging onto him and hoping he could feel every ounce of comfort and kindness she could possibly pour into the hug.

They don’t say anything. ___

As soon as (y/n) was in the privacy of her dorm, where she could lock her door and put the outside world on hold for a minute, she made her way to her desk.

Pulling open a drawer and lifting the mess of papers to reach underneath, she sighs as she pulls out the hidden envelope.  There wasn’t much of a reason to be digging for it now, seeing as it’s contents were seared into her memory like a white hot brand, but something drove her to opening it once more.

The wax seal with the Zen’ins’ crest stamped into the fold of the envelope was still intact, but no longer keeping it glued shut.  Any stickiness it once had was now worn away from overuse.

(y/n’s) fingers worked on muscle memory, her eyes shut as she pulled out the letter inside, unfolding it and smoothing the creases between the pads of her fingers.  When her eyes opened, the same message was before her.

No matter how much she hoped it would change, it hadn’t.  No matter how many times she's read it, it still held all the same letters, all the same punctuation, all the same slant of the crosses through the t's.  Still, she wished it hadn't.  She’d rather accept schizophrenic delusions than what this letter contained.

The sigh she let out racked through her whole body, bringing her into a slump over her desk.

Like clockwork, she scanned through the words.  Hoping to catch something she hadn’t seen before, even though she’d given up sleep to read and re-read this letter, until her morning alarm had shocked her from her stupor.

Still, it remained the same.

It’s come to our attention that the child of Fushiguro Toji is being harbored at this household.  If the boy has developed his cursed technique, he is to be returned to his proper place with the Zen’in Clan at once.  Failure to do so will be treated as an act of defiance- and anyone involved will be punished to the fullest extent of Jujutsu Sorcerer Code.  We expect him returned  and in good health by three days.  

Otherwise, we will take the matter into our own hands- and we will collect him.

- Naobito Zen’in

The amount of times her eyes have burned the image of his words into her mind is unknown to her, but after a few minutes she folds it back up neatly at it’s creases, tucks it back into it’s envelope, and carefully places it in it’s hiding spot at the bottom of her desk drawer.

It dawns on her that no amount of plotting and running would ever work.  The Zen’ins were smarter than any plan she could come up with, no matter how thought out, no matter how perfect, they would always catch up to her.  She alone wasn’t enough to outsmart them.  

And even if she did, where did that put her? On the lamb with two kids that she could barely afford to support- who weren’t even hers, which was a whole other load of risks- and she’d have to say goodbye to being a jujutsu sorcerer.  Best case scenario she works two jobs to pay bills, put food on the table, all while having to keep an eye over her shoulder for any sign of threat.  This was all assuming the Fushiguro kids would even want her to do this.

It reminded her that she still had to decide what she was going to tell them about this letter- or if she was going to tell them about this letter.  They weren’t nearly old enough for the whole truth, and if (y/n) was honest with herself, she wasn’t ready to tell them the whole truth.

Hell, I couldn’t even tell them their Dad was dead.  They had to come to assume that on their own.  Not that this news seemed to shock them, or bother them in the slightest.

Leaning over her desk and grabbing fistfuls of her hair, she tried to focus on one thought at a time.  But with a mountain of issues and only three days to figure out how to get out of them, the anxiety was beginning to consume her more than ever before.

Running away wasn’t an option.  She couldn’t win if she ran away.  And besides, it wasn’t her style, she was never one to run from a fight.

This secret of yours, is it worth your life?

When Suguru had asked her this, she didn’t have an answer.  When she’d returned to the Fushiguro household after her overseas assignment and had been overcome with relief that they had been safe in her absence, she was certain she’d do anything to protect them.

Now that this letter had found it’s way to her, she had her answer in mind.  Crystal clear.  In a void of anxiety, rage, and paranoia, it was a certainty she could anchor herself to.

This was worth her life.  Megumi and Tsumiki, they were worth her life.  She didn’t know it three months ago when she’d found them, that they would become such an important part of her life.  She didn’t know it when she’d overheard the Sorcerer Killer briefly mention something about children- that she would be their sole provider and that she would step into the shoes he left at the door when he’d abandoned them.  She never knew that deep down, there was a part of her that knew Tsumiki and Megumi were hers now.

(y/n) didn’t know that when she’d begun her search for them, eight months ago, that it had come with a vow to protect the both of them as if they were her own, and now it was time for her to keep her word, and do she had to in order to protect them.

Her feet moved on their own accord, it seemed, as she flew through the corridors and sidewalks of Jujutsu Tech’s campus towards the gym, concerning the few scattered underclassmen who hung around in the courtyard during their freetime.

The run was winding, but it was only a warm up compared to the rigorous training she was going to have to put herself through if she had even a chance of taking on the Zen’in Clan. ___

The swords strapped to (y/n’s) back never felt heavier.

In fact, until now, she’s not sure she’s ever noted their weight on her back.  Maybe when she had first started practicing with them as a First Year.  But it felt like ever since she’d first picked them up, she’d never felt a desire to put them down.  With her cursed technique being difficult to master and not always reliable on an assignment, her weapons were her greatest strength, and she wielded them with a tremendous amount of comfort and confidence.

They were an extension of her.  Like an extra set of limbs, her swords were something she could control on muscle memory, with no real though, no second guess, they swung through the air on their own accord.  The moment she’d picked them up during her first year, they’d been her most prized possession.

Now, as she walked back to her dorm from her rough training session, she was all too aware of their weight.

Her hair that had been neatly tied up at the beginning of her workout was starting to come undone, messy strands falling around her face, a few sticking to the sheen of sweat that covered her forehead.  No matter how many times she’d pushed them back, they’d fall again.  Eventually, she gave into the minor annoyance and let the loose strands stick to her face.  She was heading straight for the shower in her dorm, anyway.

Despite her heaving chest and aching muscles, it was a good session.  Her assignment in Brazil had humbled her, reminded her that she had been avoiding training, instead spending most of her free time sneaking into town, and the rest of her free time trying to convince everyone around her that she wasn’t up to anything shady.  That had been exhausting enough.  Now she was going to throw her substantial and detailed training routine back into the mix.

With a groan, (y/n) rolled her shoulder, hoping she hadn’t actually pulled a muscle, but had just overworked one that hadn’t been properly used in a while.  She brought her hand up to the junction between her arm and shoulder, feeling around as she stretched and rolled the tired limb, trying to gauge for herself if she’d need heat, or ice first.

It was a familiar holler of her name that pulled her from her internal debate, and she glanced toward the voice to see Yaga across the yard with his arm raised to get her attention.

Beside him, leaning against the wall of the building of now empty classrooms, was Satoru.

Both of them had their usual sunglasses perched on their noses, but only one of them seemed to be looking her way.

Puzzled, she slowly made her way over to them, wondering what business Yaga could have that involved the both of them.  Satoru only went on solo missions these days, and there was no chance her teacher was shoving another assignment on her plate when she hadn’t scrubbed away the eye bags from the last one.

(Sure, she hadn’t done herself any favors, but he didn’t have to know that)

“I’m glad I caught you,” Yaga greeted when (y/n) was in earshot.  Her eyes briefly shot from her teacher, to Satoru, who still wasn’t paying her any attention, and then back to Yaga.  “Although I’m sorry to say it’s not great news I have for you two”

(y/n’s) brow furrowed in the slightest, at a loss with guessing what this could be about.

“Bad news?” She mumbled, more to herself than to either of the people beside her.

Yaga speaks, and (y/n) hears him.  She takes in the words he says, follows the movement of his mouth and the microexpressions of his face as he speaks.  There’s no background noise that he has to speak over, and his tone isn’t quiet.  It’s clear, and certain.  There’s no reason she shouldn’t register every word he says.

But he stops, and her ears are ringing, and her heart is beating so hard, so loud in her chest, that she finds herself mumbling, “what?”

“Don’t make me say it again,” Yaga sighs, and it doesn’t sound harsh like the words might imply.  He sounds defeated.  (y/n) can see in his face that he truly doesn’t want to repeat himself.  With every fiber of his being, he doesn’t want to speak it into existence, thus acknowledging what he was saying was true.

Again, when he speaks, (y/n’s) expression remains frozen.  Her eyes are wide, her jaw is dropped open, and at her sides, her hands are curling into fists.  Any thought of her swords being heavy on her back have left her mind, as there is no physical weight greater than learning of the horrors someone you once loved was capable of comitting.  It’s as though the rest of the world is disappearing little by little, and it’s just the three of them here, experiencing the same earth shattering revelation.

“Suguru fled after killing everyone in the village,”

(y/n) wants to turn to Satoru, maybe to gauge his reaction, maybe to reach out and offer some semblance of comfort, she’s not sure.  It doesn’t matter, as she’s unable to move in the slightest.  Her feet are glued, her arms are stiff, and the only movement on her entire body is a slight twitch at the corner of her left eye.

“Suguru’s parents’ home is vacant as well,” Yaga continues, and it’s clear that he’s doing everything in his power to keep his voice even.  “However, from the bloodstains and the residuals… it seems he might have done the same to his parents”

He pauses, the heavy words hang in the air between the three like a poisonous gas.  It’s thick, suffocating, and a devastating slice of reality that just couldn’t be true.

(y/n) had just talked to Suguru.  It’s the first thought that skitters across her darkening mind.  It’s just as quickly replaced with a drop in her gut, which could only be her heart plummeting to it’s untimely end.

Everything he’d told her that day replayed in her memories.  And suddenly, all the odd things he’d said appeared to her as red flags.  The unsettling feeling that had crept down her spine that day now came back in a full body shiver.

It’s the first noticeable movement she’s made since Yaga had broken the news.  Satoru’s eyes land on her due to this, and they remain on her as their teacher continues to explain the situation.  Although it seems he doesn’t have much more information.

“Satoru… (y/n)...” The man sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose in a desperate attempt to keep his composure in front of his students.  “I also… have no idea what is going on”

There’s not much more for him to say.  He apologizes to them both afterwards.  But he can’t stand there and watch as tears gather in (y/n’s) eyes and rage begins to seep into Satoru’s facial features.  So he tells them the higher ups will do the best they can, and then leaves them.

Logically, (y/n) knows she should be having a panic attack right about now.  Not just from the news alone, but the guilt that had crashed over her and was now pumping through her bloodstream.  Suguru had laid out what he’d been going through right in front of her, and she hadn’t been able to pick up on the obvious signs because she’d been so focused on her own issues.

With a shaky hand, she covered her mouth, afraid that she might break into  a sob if she didn’t physically stop herself.

She hadn’t turned to Satoru yet, hadn’t noticed the way he was carefully watching every moment of her grief processing.  If she had, she might have seen the way his hand was inching forward, his body having a mind of its own when it came to her.

Even if he had reached out to her- taken her hand or pulled her into his body and never ever letting go- Satoru doesn’t think it’s a good idea.  With the bomb that had been dropped on them both, he couldn’t possibly try to calculate how such an action would cause (y/n) to react.

The last time he’d watched grief strike her, she had barely been consolable for days.  He couldn’t have her shutting down, not right away, anyways.

Her phone rings, the sudden break in the heavy atmosphere causing both of them to flinch, just a little bit.

Instinct tells her to decline it, but seeing it’s Shoko, (y/n) swipes right to answer and she has the phone to her ear in seconds.

“Shoko, thank god, listen, I need to-”

“(y/n),” The girl on the other line cuts her off, and the grave tone in which she says her name is enough for (y/n) to shut her mouth.  “You need to find Satoru, and you need to come meet with me.  Right.  Now”

They don’t exchange more than the location in town that Shoko had been, the lack of context filling itself between the gaps.

(y/n’s) hands tremble as she secures her phone in her pocket and turns to Satoru.  He notices her jaw is also trembling, in the slightest anxious movement.  She doesn’t have to explain the escalating situation, he’d been right there, he’d heard the whole thing, but still, she finds herself stammering over her words as she tries anyway.

“Shoko- she’s- I think she’s with him- at- somewhere in town- um- outside-”

Satoru steps forward, closing a significant amount of space between them.  (y/n) stops talking immediately, and doesn’t try to explain herself again.

For a brief moment, but finally, they look at one another.

Her eyes are full of tears, but somehow she’d kept herself from actually letting herself cry in front of him.  Her lip wobbles and she looks like she desperately wants to say something, but the words just don’t come out.  He holds her gaze, and every bone in his body is screaming at him to comfort her.  To say something to do something just to make sure she won’t cry.

But he’s just as lost as she is, and he knows all too well that there were no words that could put her at ease in this moment.

Instead, he reaches out and takes both of her hands in his, holding on tightly as what comes next wasn’t exactly pleasant for the person he brought with him.  

Teleporting alone was as easy as breathing, almost second nature.  Being a sort of carry-on to someone else who was teleporting always seemed to bring on a wave of motion sickness.

(y/n’s) hands squeeze his to prepare herself for the oncoming discomfort.  Even though what came after the dizziness would be much, much more sickening.

“I’m taking us right now” Satoru tells her. ___

a/n: no suguru don’t defect ur so sexyyy ur prolly thinking right about now that i only want to see my readers suffer.  and ur right. i do. :3

taglist: @whats-humanity-lol @malinq-ashida @mor-pheus@bekahtaylorgriggs@pookiea@megumimind@thealchemical@pearlstiare@niallerhere@96jnie @purpleguk @peqch-pie@yukinemaroop@makis-girl@sadtoru​ @kamikokii​ @nerdiel-has-no-braincells​ @googlesheetshoe​ @vzleria

xoxo ~ jordie

[richincolor]

Ode to the Olympics: Books & Sports

I'm a big fan of the Olympics and have absolutely let responsibilities go in favor of watching amazing sport. And I thought, as the Olympics come to a close that I'd share some books that focus on athletes aiming to be their best all while dealing with the trials of adolescence. 

Rez Ball by Byron Graves

These days, Tre Brun is happiest when he is playing basketball on the Red Lake Reservation high school team—even though he can’t help but be constantly gut-punched with memories of his big brother, Jaxon, who died in an accident. When Jaxon's former teammates on the varsity team offer to take Tre under their wing, he sees this as his shot to represent his Ojibwe rez all the way to their first state championship. This is the first step toward his dream of playing in the NBA, no matter how much the odds are stacked against him. But stepping into his brother’s shoes as a star player means that Tre can’t mess up. Not on the court, not at school, and not with his new friend, gamer Khiana, who he is definitely not falling in love with. After decades of rez teams almost making it, Tre needs to take his team to state. Because if he can live up to Jaxon's dreams, their story isn’t over yet.

Check out this trailer for Rez Ball coming next month!

You Don't Have a Shot by Racquel Marie

Valentina “Vale” Castillo-Green’s life revolves around soccer. Her friends, her future, and her father’s intense expectations are all wrapped up in the beautiful game. But after she incites a fight during playoffs with her long-time rival, Leticia Ortiz, everything she’s been working toward seems to disappear. Embarrassed and desperate to be anywhere but home, Vale escapes to her beloved childhood soccer camp for a summer of relaxation and redemption…only to find out that she and the endlessly aggravating Leticia will be co-captaining a team that could play in front of college scouts. But the competition might be stiffer than expected, so unless they can get their rookie team’s act together, this second chance―and any hope of playing college soccer―will slip through Vale’s fingers. When the growing pressure, friendship friction, and her overbearing father push Vale to turn to Leticia for help, what starts off as a shaky alliance of necessity begins to blossom into something more through a shared love of soccer. . . and maybe each other.

Chasing Pacquiano by Rod Pulido

Self preservation. That's Bobby's motto for surviving his notoriously violent high school unscathed. Being out and queer would put an unavoidable target on his back, especially in a Filipino community that frowns on homosexuality. It's best to keep his head down, get good grades, and stay out of trouble. But when Bobby is unwillingly outed in a terrible way, he no longer has the luxury of being invisible. A vicious encounter has him scrambling for a new way to survive--by fighting back. Bobby is inspired by champion Filipino boxer Manny Pacquiao to take up boxing and challenge his tormentor. Then Pacquiao publicly declares his stance against queer people, and Bobby's faith--in his hero and in himself--is shaken to the core.

And Other Mistakes by Erika Turner

Aaliyah's home life has never been great, but she thought she'd survive her last years of high school with at least her friendships and cross-country stardom intact. That is, until junior year she got outed by a church elder and everything came undone ― including Aaliyah. Now, senior year is about to start and she is determined to come back faster and wiser. No more letting other people define her. No more losing herself to their expectations. Except... well, with new friends, old flames, nosy school counselors, and teammates who don't trust her yet, the route already feels rough. And what's with the new girl, Tessa, who gives Aaliyah butterflies every time she looks at her? Regardless, everything is fine. She'll be fine. Because this is the year to prove to everyone―and most of all, herself―that she's more than her mistakes. After all, even Aaliyah can't outrun everything.

[mayasaura]

Fill up Edgeworth's jail cell with acid for every time he messed with a case, or made his sister look silly for looking in the wrong place for statues, or said, "I hear you are having a rough time maintaining perfection in this country."

And then, at the end of a thousand years, he would say, "Wright, Franziska, I have learned not to do any of these things because I hated the acid they put on me." And they would say, "Punishment-based alteration of behavior is notoriously unreliable. Now apologize, asshole, and we'll sue them for unlawful imprisonment and acid damage."

[staywithmesana]

First Thailand trip. First out of the country trip with just friends. First Twice concert.

It was surreal. It was epic.

As of this writing, both weekends with Twice are already over and I'm struggling to express my feelings.

There has to be a name to capture this jumble of feelings, right? Cause it has been swirling around me virtually every minute of the last few days as I reflect on my experiences with Twice and gently re-enter the real world.

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THE DECISION.

When I first discovered more about Twice, it was a pandemic. "More" since I previously knew them through my great friend Pat, but I never had the opportunity to listen to their music.

It was during More and More when I first saw Sana, and gosh, I know I'm going to love her for the rest of my life. It was as if I had been transported elsewhere, and I craved more of her. I was smitten by her eyes, her tone, and everything about her, especially her orange hair.

I knew I'd do everything to see and hear her and Twice sing live, and I finally got what I'd been hoping for the last four years when I watched the girl herself perform at Impact Arena.

The Ready to Be tour was announced in February, and I was both excited and nervous about whether the Philippines would be included, as they had only announced Part I at the time. Until they announced a few months later that our country will be included in the trip!

I think it was around that time that Hannah introduced me to Rina, and we all agreed that we’d buy VIP tickets. But of course, not everything will go according to plan.

We were only able to obtain Lower Box tickets for both days in the Philippines, which was devastating because we were unable to secure our preferred seats. All the plans for banners and signs that we would show Twice went down the drain. It was then that they decided to plan a trip to Thailand to see Twice. I'm not going to lie; at first, I was skeptical. I was unsure whether my savings were enough, and I am anxious about staying days out of the country with just friends (I’m blaming my introvertness!).

A couple of thoughts came to my mind:

What will happen during our trip? Will I fit in well? Will I be awkward? What if I mess up? What if they don't like me?

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But there's just this excitement in my heart that urges me to try new things. I want to try to go to a place where my soul can grow, a place where I can get out of my comfort zone and explore different aspects of myself.

So I said, “Fuck it, I want to see Sana up close!”

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The Thailand Ready to Be in Thailand concert ticket sales arrived, and we were worried because this would be our last chance to see them in the VIP section. In comparison to the Philippines, the Thailand website was smooth and simple to use! Just a quick note to self, use a card that is accepted in Bangkok.

A couple of hiccups later, we finally got the tickets!

Relief and delight washed over me as the reality of going to another country to see Sana dawned on me.

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I felt slightly melancholy. Another wave of anxiety washed over me as I methodically planned the next trip, thinking that my sister is not going to be with me.

But I know what I want and what makes me happy. And I know that if I prioritize staying in my comfort zone, I would regret not going for the rest of my life. And I don’t want to do that to me.

Deep down inside I know that I am excited, I’m just scared that I will go there, and my head will be full of “Oh God, when is this going to be over?”

Fortunately for me, the friends I went with are the best (I'll dedicate a special section to them later).

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THAILAND & FRIENDS.

We booked tickets with Cebu Pacific Airlines, which added to our worries because the airline is notorious for canceling flights, and we won't know what to do if that happens.

And I believe that as soon as we got to the airport, all the luck showered on us, because there were no problems after that.

There were no flight delays. We had no problems with our luggage. Everyone went through immigration without incident. Everything was fine.

I was so happy.

Two extroverts and two introverts were, in my opinion, the ideal trip companions.

There was enough humor to make it extremely enjoyable and I wasn't compelled to interact all of the time because everyone respected everyone's peace and pace.

The first two people on this list were folks with whom I had never previously interacted. They are the people I have been anxious to meet, and I'm relieved that my concerns were unfounded.

Lee would fill in the gaps whenever there was dead air, loves to joke around, and loves to take great photographs, taking his fill on adventures as it was his first time out of the country. It was fun since he was there, and I had a fantastic time laughing at his shenanigans.

Rina was also an extrovert (though she insists she isn't), and I swear every time we turned around, she had made new friends (particularly at the concert hall). We instantly discussed Blackpink and Twice because we both adore both groups. Because of her it was never a dull moment. My co-water warrior, I appreciate all of our conversations and how you always include me in them. I’m glad that I got to know you!

Finally, Hannah, the mother of the group, HAHAHAHA! She truly took care of us all, from the time we booked our concert tickets, booked our airline tickets to our Airbnb accommodations and navigated our way around Thailand. She was the only one I knew from the group; but we had only gotten out twice before going to Thailand. Without her, I doubt we would have had a pleasant experience. I really enjoyed how she bargained with the locals ("There they said it's only 10 baht" iykyk) HAHAHA! We received discounts, but she purchased bracelets that were at least 20 times more expensive. Budol is real. Thank you for your assurance that everything will be well, and you are right that I did enjoy the trip! Thank you for inviting me to join you on this trip! This is an experience I will remember for the rest of my life.

Thailand has amazing food, and I have great friends, what more could you ask for, right?

I was able to have this out-of-body and amazing experience of witnessing Twice up close because of you three! And of course, visit one of the most tourist-friendly countries, Thailand. I will surely return!

I’m glad that I trusted my instincts, and that is to trust you! So many great things happened, and I would have completely missed out on all of these things had I not gone. And I’m not so sure that these things would have happened in the same way had I not been with you three.

We went anywhere we wanted. We did anything we wanted. We ate anything we wanted.

Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

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TWICE.

September seemed a lifetime away when we got our tickets, but it finally arrived, and on September 24th, Hannah, Rina, and I made our way to Impact Arena with our concert gear (aka our lightsticks and our hearts full of love for Twice).

We arrived early because we were used to huge queues and expected delays and mishaps.

But surprise, surprise! We finished everything in 15 minutes. From claiming the physical tickets, buying official merch to buying our lunch for the day!

We even had time to line up for the photo wall.

And of course, we would not miss the chance to kneel before Sana! :D

We lined up the queue, and since my number was 1111, we were praying hard that we could get a good spot. So, by the time we got to the gate, we were running like hell to our chosen section, and we managed to reach at least four rows after the barricade!

Remember the screenshot earlier? About our desired spot? We managed to get there. Yay!

At this point, I was getting fatigued but yet enthusiastic because the soundcheck was about to begin. My feet and legs were aching, but my heart was overjoyed.

A couple of folks were telling Rina about their Twice concert experiences. Others had the opportunity to see the girls from years ago, while some had the opportunity to attend the day before us. And as I listened to their stories, I became more excited about what was to follow. Along with the hope that Sana is feeling better, and that we get to interact with them even if it’s just a few seconds.

Soundcheck began about a minute or two after 3 p.m. And my heart was racing so hard! They're finally in front of me after a long time of anticipating seeing Twice!

At the same time, the entire VIP area went berserk, and they began to push their way to the front to have a closer look of the girls and to engage with them.

I tried to take a quick shot of them, but I was immediately stopped by the guards, and when I witnessed individuals being escorted out of the stadium, I became terrified and decided not to risk being tossed out. It was a mess, really. Someone even lost their footwear!

(credits to Rina for this screenshot):

As soon as I saw a glimpse of Sana’s beautiful wavy hair and pretty face, I forgot the pain in my legs! She really is beautiful!

But since I spent a scary amount of time watching her videos, I noticed that something's wrong. She’s not like her usual self, and mostly stayed at the left side of the stage (we were standing at the right side). Even her eyes are not glowing like before. We started to get worried because we know that their schedule is no joke, and she might be really tired at this point.

If you hadn't already guessed, yes, I am a Sana-biased fan.

So seeing that my bias was not in the mood is worrying, but I can see that she did her best, and still interacted with fans.

The soundcheck lasted around ten minutes and consisted of only three songs; by the time it was over, we were already closer to the stage due to the pushing. So, while it was frightening, it was also a blessing in disguise.

Maybe you’re wondering about my first impression with Twice members, I’ll get into that later.

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THE CONCERT.

The VCR changed without warning. Ignoring the discomfort in my legs, my excitement shot through the roof as I realized the moment I had been waiting for had arrived. The time has come for me to see and hear Twice live for the first time with their full costume.

“I’m about to hear the group that I have enjoyed listening to for years.” I thought to myself.

I loved the way they were unveiled to the stage, and then the screen showed them all lined up, looking all serious and ready to rock my world. The feeling of adrenaline and happiness rushed within me as they walked and line up for their Set Me Free performance.

Instantly felt myself sweating from the time they finished their first song, maybe because: 1. The spotlights were really intense, and 2. TWICE PERFORMANCE WERE SO HOT!

The screen showed a very lovely Kim Dahyun starting the routine, and my mind flashed back to the first time I saw her. She was truly wacky and one-of-a-kind, and I never imagined (though I really hoped) that I would watch them one day, let alone in another country.

I remembered the girl beside me trying to help me capture moments, since my hands were already hurting due to fatigue, and the people in front of me were really tall. I know that this will never reach her, but I just want to say thank you.

I Can’t Stop Me was next. I’m still in a daze, but I couldn’t help but sing along with Nayeon’s “Allami ullyeodae ring, ring-a-linga” and as soon as the pre-chorus started with Sana’s heavenly vocals singing, “Maeumsogeuroneun da algo itjanha, gyeolgugeneun seoneul neomge doel georaneun geol”, I lost it. As much as I hate to admit it, I really loved Sana’s moves during that part, and I spent an insane amount of time watching fancams and dance videos of ICSM because of that part.

And just like that, they finished their first two songs and started with their first ment. The crowd was screaming as soon as they introduced themselves.

I was just standing there, thinking to myself, “Woah, they are real people. I just saw them perform, and I’m not dreaming at all.”

The lights changed and Jeongyeon’s voice echoed throughout the whole arena, as she sang the first lines of “Go Hard”. And I know that it will be hot, and of course the red lights are not helping at all. They were in perfect sync, and you can’t help but think about how much time they spent perfecting the choreography.

This was followed by More and More, which showed a dreamy image of them sitting on ladders while performing choreography. They walked towards the extended stage halfway through the song, and seeing how hard they danced to it, followed by Moonlight Sunrise and Brave felt surreal.

It was as though they were completely different individuals on stage than their regular effervescent personas.

And then finally, Dahyun, Tzuyu, Sana, Momo and Mina exited the stage, while Chaeyoung, Jihyo, Jeongyeon and Nayeon stayed to talk to us a bit more as the first group of solo performers prepared for their stages.

I won’t go into detail about all of the performances, but I will tell you what I felt the first time that I saw the girls.

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FIRST IMPRESSIONS.

Im Nayeon.

I must admit that I understand where her confidence comes from when she confidently declares that she is the most beautiful, because she truly is pretty. And the way she hits those high notes, is like a blessing to our ears. Unfortunately I was unable to take as many videos and photos of her because I was distracted by my bias the whole time.

Yoo Jeongyeon.

I WAS STUNNED. She has such a little and lovely face that all you can do is stare at her. But her voice, oh God, her voice is so powerful that I couldn't help but regret not joining the fandom earlier and missing the opportunity to hear her perform One in a Million live. 

Hirai Momo.

Dance God with barbie-like features. She was always smiling and waving at our side of the stage, and I saw how cute she interacts with fans. Momo has a captivating stage presence and appears to be in her own universe while she performs. This is due to her intense focus on her performance in her aim to provide her audience with the best spectacle possible.

Park Jihyo.

She is a force to be reckoned with. Her high precision dance maneuvers electrify the audience, and she sings with the passion of a firebird. Her high notes are like pearls, each one more valuable than the last . She is unquestionably the best leader Twice can ask for.

Myoi Mina

On stage, she is a queen, her presence imposing and her aura irresistible. When she exits the stage, she returns to her modest self, kind and unassuming to the point where she was surprised that people screamed her name so much because of her sensual performance. Her facial features are delicate and ethereal that you can look at her all day long.

Kim Dahyun.

Her performance of "Try" is a work of art, a beautiful blend of power and emotion. Her smile is like a ray of sunshine, filling the room with warmth. Above all, she embodies quirkiness, with her half-moon eyes that twinkle like stars in the night sky. They crinkle at the corners as she grins, like crescent moons reflecting her warmth, kindness, and playful spirit..

Son Chaeyoung

She walks confidently onto the stage, her dimples flashing like two crescent moons, adding touch to the whimsy of her beauty. Her vocals are sometimes overlooked, yet she has a distinct and expressive voice that complements her song "My Guitar" well. She reminds me of a chameleon, always altering her style and look while being true to herself. Her raps were like fire, igniting the passion of her fans.

Chou Tzuyu

When she threw water at us, it felt like we were blessed. It is true that when you look at her beauty, you couldn’t help but stare and wonder if the one in front of you is a real person or a goddess. A celestial beauty descended from the heavens. Her beauty combined with humility and kindness is a true gift to the world. We really need more Tzuyus in the world. She may be the youngest, but her exquisite movements can make anyone melt.

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MINATOZAKI SANA.

I always get asked, “Who is your ultimate bias?”

And I always dodge the question, because how can I even choose?

But after seeing her perform for three days, I now have an answer. Minatozaki Sana.

Vocals. Visual. Dancer. Writer. Performer. Minatozaki Sana is all of these things. She is also the love of my life. There was no way I could begin or end my day without listening to her voice or raving over her beauty. As the three of us (Rina, Hannah, and I) discussed, we would rather feel down than see her sad. She is the embodiment of joy. If I could, I would formally thank her for her excellent timing, since every time I felt low and couldn't take another step, she would always post something or send a note in Bubble. I'm sure many people don't realize it, but Sana is a lifeboat for me on a rainy day at the ocean.

What was it like seeing her perform live?

It was like stepping into a fairy tale.

She was everything that I imagined and more. Her beauty is breathtaking, her talent is undeniable, and her aura is enticing. It felt like I was in the presence of royalty, and I knew it was a moment I would remember for the rest of my life.

The experience of filming "New Rules" was surreal. I was so used to watching her on the screen of my phone that when I did it, I couldn't believe I had the opportunity to film her personally.

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ENDING.

It was all over in a blink of an eye, and I wish we had more time to watch the girls perform, but I guess that’s just an excuse to book another VIP experience in the future, right? Unless I hit the jackpot and sponsor one of their albums in the future and get the chance to meet them up close and personal before then...

If you see this blog, it means that you also know how much I love Sana and Dahyun and their dynamic. And you also probably know how they saw our banner, and Dahyun ‘tried’ to piggyback Sana.

It was just one other thing that happened before the concert ended, but I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of talking about this moment. I know that my friends and family are sick of it already, but when you’ve supported an artist with your whole heart, no feeling will ever come close to the one created when you see them live and when they notice you.

No words will ever do this experience justice.

The moment that I saw Dahyun notice the banner that Hannah was holding, my heart pounded like crazy, since it was apparent that she looked around to check if Sana was near. Then, a couple of seconds later, we saw her pull Sana closer to our side, and then they did as we asked! She leaned down, and Sana tried to piggyback on her.

It was only a split second because Sana was wearing a skirt, and Dahyun, being the greenest flag of all, stopped immediately and held on to Sana’s skirt to protect her.

What's funny was due to us gaypanicking, Hannah and I were unable to get a good shot about what we experienced.

After that moment, Dahyun even did a thumbs up sign, as if asking if we were satisfied with what they did. Truly the queen of fanservice.

Everything about the experience was special. It’s moments like this that help you forget all about the things that are bothering you, the things that are weighing you down, and even if it only lasts for an hour, or even just a second, I felt happiness.

It was short and sweet but definitely a moment that I’ll remember forever and one I feel very lucky to have had.

[thealexanderfiles]

Same DC anon here. Want more DC chaos akin to what you’ve said you like, with a canon basis? I gotchu:

Discowing. This was not only real, but also Dick’s emo era.

The time Clark Kent had to pretend to be Bruce on a yacht and then Deathstroke showed up while Superman was plastered.

Batcow. That’s all.

One time, Dick as Robin broke his arm. Bruce needed a way to hide that both Dick Grayson and Robin had broken arms, so rather than doing something rational, he did this: every day, he wore a different color batsuit, culminating in the last day when he wore a fully rainbow batsuit, to distract everyone from the fact that Robin had a broken arm.

Every member of the batfam, including Lafred, has disguised themselves as this one henchman that is notorious among rogues for messing everything up “by accident.”

One time, much of the batfam accidentally ended up at the same crime scene. We get an exchange that is essentially: Dick: “This feels like a test.” Bruce: “It is.” Dick: “From you, not God.”

Dick once considered eating dog food.

When Tim told Dick that Steph was pregnant (Tim and Steph were dating then - which is not batcest, Steph is not a Wayne, though she is emotionally Bruce’s child, good thing she’s not dating anyone in the family anymore but still if she were it would be fine - but Tim wasn’t the father), Dick stumbled and either almost or just straight up fell off a train.

Before becoming Robin, Tim essentially just hyperfixated on both Robin and Dick Grayson, as the same entity and as separate entities. Fanon exaggerates Tim’s stalker era to an extreme extent (I love it and incorporate it into my personal canon, but I can acknowledge the actual text doesn’t match what it has become), but like Tim did know exactly where Dick lived, was able to recognize him in full clown makeup, and I believe crossed the country to find him.

I definitely have more if you want!!

100/10

dont answer me now. go do whatever u need to, eat, sleep and drink and chill out. hope you have a nice day, Mystery Informant. Until we meet again (Which ngl is probably in to that far of a future.)

[dadgamerhq]

The Most Challenging Titles for the Nintendo 64!

Is the Nintendo 64 the greatest game console of all time? We reckon it’s certainly up there. With its 64-bit graphics and quirky controller, it was a real game changer. But, like all things in life, it wasn’t without its flaws. Some of the games were rather tough—occasionally downright infuriating. A few of them were difficult for all the wrong reasons, where shoddy production values made them harder than they should have been. Here are the 20 most challenging N64 games that probably had you pulling your hair out. 1 of 20 Superman 64 - Developer: Titus Interactive

We don’t usually kick things off with a “hard because it’s rubbish” game, but “Superman 64” is something of a legend in the world of bad games. Sure, it had the name recognition, and the chance to don the cape of the Man of Steel sounded exciting. But this game is a glitchy mess with controls that are more confusing than a Rubik’s Cube in the dark. Many players couldn’t even manage the first objective without wanting to hurl the controller out the window. 2 of 20 Perfect Dark - Developer: Rare

Let’s pivot from one of the worst to perhaps one of the best. “Perfect Dark” took everything people loved about “GoldenEye” and cranked it up a notch. One of those notches was the difficulty, but “Perfect Dark” was such a thrill that most didn’t mind. Special mention goes to the “Perfect Agent” difficulty level, which might as well be renamed “Mission: Impossible.” 3 of 20 Donkey Kong 64 - Developer: Rare

“Donkey Kong” games have always had a sneaky way of being surprisingly difficult. They’re so fun that you almost forget how tough they are. “Donkey Kong 64” may not reach the heights of “Donkey Kong Country,” but it’s still a cracking game. The real challenge here is the relentless item collecting—miss something, and you’ll find yourself backtracking more than a forgetful postman. It’s time-consuming and a touch frustrating. 4 of 20 Conker’s Bad Fur Day - Developer: Rare

Here’s an oddity for you. Conker, the cheeky squirrel, started life in “Diddy Kong Racing” before taking a sharp left turn into adult-rated territory with “Conker’s Bad Fur Day.” This game is a bit of a mess, with a story so bizarre it’s almost easy to overlook how tough the gameplay is. But don’t be fooled by the swearing and crude jokes—it’s not an easy ride. 5 of 20 Turok 2: Seeds of Evil - Developer: Acclaim

“Turok: Dinosaur Hunter” was one of the N64’s early hits, and the sequel upped the ante in every way. This one’s more of a horror game, with boss fights that are notoriously difficult. The levels are massive, and it’s easy to get lost—which might be part of the horror, to be honest. This game also pushed the N64 to its limits, which means it’s as tricky to navigate as it is to survive. 6 of 20 Blast Corps - Developer: Rare

A puzzle game that’s one of the N64’s best-kept secrets, “Blast Corps” challenges you with increasingly difficult levels—57 in total, no less. The medal challenges towards the end are the stuff of legend, with even the game’s developers admitting they’re “technically possible” to beat. Good luck with that one. 7 of 20 F-Zero X - Developer: Nintendo

Racing games are often seen as lighthearted fun, but “F-Zero X” is having none of that. The follow-up to the SNES’s “F-Zero” is blisteringly fast, and the tiniest mistake can send you flying off the track. It’s a game that demands perfection, which is easier said than done. 8 of 20 Body Harvest - Developer: Midway

“Body Harvest” was delayed because Nintendo thought it was too violent. When it finally came out, the violence was all anyone could talk about, but it’s also an incredibly tough game. The save points are few and far between, and the gameplay is about as intuitive as a physics textbook written in Klingon. Prepare to die. A lot. 9 of 20 Doom 64 - Developer: Midway

We’ve always felt “Doom” belongs on a PC, but that didn’t stop the series from making its way to consoles. “Doom 64” has the honour of being the hardest of the bunch, with enemies that are tougher than a two-dollar steak. It’s a real challenge, even for seasoned “Doom” veterans. 10 of 20 Mischief Maker - Developer: Nintendo

A 2D side-scrolling puzzle game on the Nintendo 64? “Mischief Makers” is a bit of a cult classic, known for its fast pace and steep learning curve. Combine those two, and you’ve got a game that feels like being thrown into the deep end of a swimming pool—without your armbands. 11 of 20 Star Wars: Shadows of the Empire - Developer: Nintendo

There’s always one tough “Star Wars” game on every Nintendo platform, and for the N64, it’s “Shadows of the Empire.” The recreation of the Battle of Hoth might be a blast, but this game is no walk in the park. Even on the easiest setting, it’s a challenge, and the hardest level is enough to turn you to the Dark Side. 12 of 20 StarCraft 64 - Developer: Blizzard

Much like “Doom,” “StarCraft” got an N64 port, but this one didn’t go over quite as well. Turning a first-person shooter into a console game is one thing, but adapting a real-time strategy game like “StarCraft” was another beast entirely. It’s tough—tougher than it needed to be—and the controls didn’t help matters. 13 of 20 Indiana Jones and the Infernal Machine - Developer: LucasArts

An original Indiana Jones adventure on the N64? That’s a bit of a novelty. Unfortunately, “Infernal Machine” proved a tough nut to crack, with levels that are confusing at best and enemies that’ll make you wish for the simplicity of dodging boulders. Still, it’s better than “Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.” 14 of 20 Diddy Kong Racing - Developer: Rare

Rare’s answer to “Mario Kart,” “Diddy Kong Racing” was hugely popular. But don’t be fooled by the cute characters—this game was tough, especially in single-player mode. It’s packed with objectives and challenges that’ll make you wish you were just cruising around in “Mario Kart” instead. 15 of 20 Glover - Developer: Nintendo

In “Glover,” you play as, well, a glove. Your job is to move a ball from the start of the level to the end. Sounds simple, right? Wrong. The controls are as tricky as they come, and getting that ball to do what you want is a real test of patience. Some people relish the challenge; others find it a slog. 16 of 20 Buck Bumble - Developer: UbiSoft

“Buck Bumble” is a sci-fi game set in the distant future of… 2010. It wasn’t the prettiest game, and the gameplay was equally clunky. Most people finished the game and still felt like they hadn’t quite figured out how to play it. Add in some dodgy graphics and thick “game fog,” and you’ve got a game that’s frustrating in more ways than one. 17 of 20 Rayman 2: The Great Escape - Developer: UbiSoft

The “Rayman” series is notorious for its difficulty, and when it made the leap to 3D, things didn’t get any easier. “The Great Escape” was a hit, but if you ever had to ride a rocket in this game, you probably experienced a few flashes of frustration (and maybe some broken controllers). 18 of 20 Ogre Battle 64: Person of Lordly Caliber - Developer: Atlus

“Ogre Battle 64” is a proper RPG, which is rare on the N64. Like many RPGs, it involves a lot of grinding—hours and hours of it. Some people love that sort of thing, but there’s no denying that it makes the game a tough nut to crack. You can enjoy a difficult game and still find it a bit of a slog. 19 of 20 Jet Force Gemini - Developer: Rare

“Jet Force Gemini” is one of the two games most often cited as the hardest on the N64. Prepare to backtrack—constantly. You’ll find yourself missing crucial items, searching for them high and low, and then needing to save every “Tribal” just to face the final boss. Oh, and that boss isn’t a pushover either. 20 of 20 The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask - Developer: Nintendo

If “Jet Force Gemini” isn’t the toughest game on the N64, it’s got to be “Majora’s Mask.” After the massive success of “Ocarina of Time,” this sequel was more divisive. It’s significantly harder, largely due to the time loop mechanic that puts you on the clock to complete puzzles and objectives. It’s a race against time, which is quite unlike your typical “Zelda” experience. Fans are divided: some love it, some hate it, but everyone agrees it’s a real challenge.

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[povestotrischane]

basic mecha vn adaptation details:

- it'll be an eroge for a variety of long and complicated reasons which basically boil down to "the public perception of vn genre has been heavily sanitized in the west, western vns are notorious for being #notlikeothervns and the words "western vn" are mainly used derogatorily, by harkening back to the legacy of classic eroge such as f/sn, tsukihime, fmdm or fucking. i don't know. rance. i feel i'd better attract fans of the genre + combat the increasing sanitization of vns, seen in Every Mainstream VN Release In The West and in increasingly in the japanese market as well (i HATE f/sn realta nua. i'm not saying nasu is good at writing h-scenes or w/e (he's cartoonishly bad at it actually) but i am saying that it's A Choice to take hf, the route about sex and sexuality and the sex = death trope, and get rid of all the h-scenes) + weed out ppl who think ddlc is soooo messed up and genuinely. would not be able to handle 10 minutes of idk. higurashi or smthing" with a side of "ofc sex and sexuality are important thematically, tf do you think i am?"

- 4 routes. gawaine is the narrator. it goes priamus -> ysabelle -> lancelot -> ragnelle. sgatgk doesn't happen until route 4. route 1 is a bit expository and is ultimately about gawaine's political machinations/two-faced-ness, modred stabs the shit out of him a la the alliterative morte in the end. route 2 is basically about gawaine doing whatever the fuck he wants forever, do his actions have consequences? eh. does he want to fuck his mecha? probably. is it more complicated than that but takes a while to articulate? yeah lol. route 3 is about uhm. obsession. it's the remarkable route and gawaine is a total freak idk what to tell you he's so abnormal in this one. route 4 is a straight up horror route in which gawaine IS naturally the perfect chivalrous knight who would never do anything he's done throughout the rest of the vn and also galahad levels of repressed. something is deeply wrong. renard the fox is there. overarching themes surround desire, indulgence/repression, chivalry, idealism, sex and sexuality.

- ok time for actual lore stuff. gringolet and galatine are the same thing. and by that i mean gawaine's mecha is galatine, in the same way that lancelot's is secace and arthur's is excaliber, etc. but also. galatine is gringolet, because he stole gringolet from the saxons and quickly decided to officially rename it to that of the mecha he's Supposed to have bc he's not stupid. the thing is, gringolet is uhm. an organic lifeform! (think nge or darling in the franxx) and sentient! and gawaine and gringolet are thus able to share a much deeper bond than anyone else in the round table and their mechas. the og galatine probably ended up being renamed to clarent and given to modred, for a mix of reasons (tie up loose ends, a mecha is a lot harder to sneak around than a sword + why would there be a ceremonial mecha? things have to be rewritten here, leads to there only being one sister mecha to excaliber, makes an easily identifiable symbol of modred and gawaine's relationship for when the inevitable fratricide comes up).

- the ladies of the lake are ais, the du hautdeserts are either robots, humonculi, or one of each, magic and technology are kinda blended to the point where pointing out the difference is kinda pointless

- aggravaine beheads lamorak for thematic reasons which come down to "damn. there seems to be a pattern with his brothers and weird psychosexual issues regarding beheadings. how would that apply to him." and uhm. lamorvaine real.

- the current state of arthur's kingdom is uhm. kinda in a bit of disrepair. like even the richest of the rich don't have the best conditions available. the world is practically covered in a thin layer of rust.

- most countries are planets (occasionally they'll also include like. nearby asteroids / moons / w/e), the names + uniforms used/worn by the knights change based on what planet they're on, in writing and in international diplomacy, they always go back to their latin names though

- tristan pilots a dogfighter instead of a mecha bc 1. he's an archer and 2. mechas are reserved for round table knights

- knights are wayyyy more likely to getting into classic sword/lance/fist/bow fights than actual duels

- morale kinda sucks in the round table as a natural result of (thematic reasons)

- uhhhhm i can't think of anything else rn

[pale-opal]

YES, AGREED. THIS WHOLE THREAD. CANON.

Also, if it's okay, I decided to combine what you both said to come up with some other game recommendations and headcanons for the characters talked about (and then some): X: I think he'd really like Scribblenauts Unlimited (he has to hide it from Axl, though. The things he would do if he once he found out that there was a game that lets you make almost anything you want to solve problems... let's just say it would make the things he does while playing BOTW look like hugging puppies). A silly puzzle game with a sweet ending and a good moral (although, he'd probably disagree with how Lily and Maxwell's father taught them to not be jerks) - checks off all the boxes. I also feel like he'd enjoy Niche. He'd get a little bit too attached to the animals, though. He'd have to fight back tears every time one died.

Zero: Honestly? Let him play Rain World. He'd probably get a kick out of trying to get through the challenges each campaign offers. He'd also have a fun time trying to piece together the story (although he would probably make the mistake of eating at least one of Moon's neuron flies. Whoops. He'd figure out what he did wrong pretty fast, though, and most likely reload his save, even if it cost him some progress.)

Axl: This boy is banned from Team Fortress 2. He'd STAY trolling on the mic. He can only play Work at a Pizza Place if he's in a private server with his friends (he'd get banned otherwise for yelling at all the children in chat because nobody was out doing delivery or supply drop-offs, even though he himself would be one of the 17 chefs or cashiers). He is notorious in Jailbreak servers for figuring how to glitch past gates and other rooms that would require a keycard, and then proceeding to teach all the kids in the server how to do the same. He'd love the Rhythm Heaven series.

Pallette: I think she'd kill it at DDR (Dance Dance Revolution). Or the Just Dance series. She'd get five stars on any song. Light work, no reaction. She and Axl compete to get higher scores.

Layer: She'd enjoy Crow Country or something dramatic like The Glass Staircase (2019). Or maybe even the Fallout franchise. The last one on the list has a little bit of everything.

Alia: Let my girl play Style Savvy. Any game in the series, it doesn't matter. She'd finish it in a matter of hours. It's similar to Dress to Impress in the sense that outfit coordination is the main component, but it also requires careful attention to detail, like Tetris does.

Signas: One might think that Signas is a casual gamer. And he is! His favorite games are Geometry Dash and Blendoku (may it rest in peace). But you know what else he would like? Story-based visual novels. Long Live the Queen would mess him up and put him back together again in dozens of different ways. Douglas: It's his fault Signas likes visual novels. He did this to him. He introduced Signas to Long Live the Queen personally. He showed him Lil' Guardsman afterward to make up for it, though. He would also like other indie titles like Sheltered or The Escapists.

Sigma: Prior to being infected with the maverick virus, he could occasionally be seen playing management games like Cooking Fever, or even something more intense like Papers, Please. After his infection, he ruined lives in SimCity just because he could. But now? He's dead. He can't play anything anymore. So.

Lunime: This man would do his first playthrough of Beholder (2016) on "government elite" difficulty and get an ending where Karl isn't dead first try. He'd also really like The Sims. His favorite is The Sims 2 because of the lore, but he plays The Sims 3 for the gameplay. After shoving that rock in Axl's head, he was able to convince him to get the game. When he and Axl aren't fighting for control of the latter's consciousness (or whatever the plot of X9 would be), they're making crude versions of Sigma and Vile or that one guy who keeps stealing their lunch from the fridge, and putting them in pools without ladders, or in rooms with rugs eerily close to fireplaces (if you know, you know).

assuming reploids can run games within their own brain, what kinds of games do you think X would enjoy most?

OOHHH AWAWAAA FINALLY SOMEBODY GIVING ME THE QUESTION THAT IM WAITING FOR!!!

Okay so I seen folks giving X their own takes of what kind of games he’ll enjoy I agree but some I don’t-

X dislikes games that have mindless violence and bloodshed. He’s a pacifist will not hesitate to fight back, also if the story is good and displays a message that he can relate to and proper morals and lessons, Puzzle games, even retro games too. Just silly games that help him to distract a little from war, but some hit harder than others.

Umm just a heads up this a long one filled with rambles and some headcanons

Here are the games I believe X would enjoy!

Tetris- Listen I just know this game would love a puzzle game! Genuinely speaking this man would get the highest scores imaginable in those Tetris royale he’s the reigning champion. I like the idea that Tetris is one of the first games that the researchers made him play when they were studying him. He finds them great for relieve stress.

Undertale - Listen the moment Axl told him that there’s an RPG where you can play as a pacifist and get the true ending. HE LOCKED IN. Like he loves that silly game to bits especially taken off guard with its themes. As he completed the whole true pacifist route (He was a Sobbing mess during the true pacifist ending). A lot people would say that sans would be his favorite character but the truth is not. The reason why he knows Sans’s thing is because Axl told him about the genocide route (he forbade anyone from playing that route on his save file, cause if they do he’s gonna be really upset.) the truth his favorites are the Dreemurs! He can relate to them on a personal level especially Toriel and Asgore. He understands their intentions, their grief, what they gone through, they are both in the right and the wrong at the same time.

They are complex characters, he doesn’t agree on Asgore killing the children but at the same time he knows that the barrier requires 7 human souls to open it. But also the moment that he broke the mercy button made him cover his mouth as he stared in shock. Toriel was doing her best to protect the children but keeping them trapped in the ruins and demonizing Asgore doesn’t help with the situation. Asriel and Chara, on how he cried in their stories as he feels nothing but guilt and pity over flowey’s existence. And yes he cried when his theme played. All characters of Undertale are complex he loves them and enjoys the nuance behind them.

Also Undyne reminds him so a lot of his wife-

Pokemon! Specifically the pokemon ranger games! Listen the idea of playing as a conservationist/ranger of helping and aiding people and pokemon alike. And then befriending said pokemon to help you solve puzzles, it’s great for him. Plus it’s nice to see conservationists getting representation in the gaming world.

The legend of Zelda series- he’s a bit picky for him to choose what game he enjoys most. He’s very well versed in the Zelda timeline, knowing all of the lore. If he had to pick a Zelda games that he enjoys the most Echoes of Wisdom and Skyward are there. Twilight Princess is probably how he got Zero into Zelda, after he watched X play it once time when he was crashing in his place. He also got Axl into it too through Botw and Totk but he unfortunately witnessed Axl committing every war crime imaginable in those games. He never in his life ever been so exasperated yet unsurprised by this. He would give him a A for creativity but man…why?

Professor Layton series is a puzzle series that he greatly enjoys, the stories are delightfully engaging, the characters are a treat and the puzzles were so much fun to do! X really enjoys Layton as a character of how well mannered and polite as a gentleman can be and lil Luke he appreciates him. He also loves the spin off featuring his adopted daughter!

Animal Crossing is a cute game for him to make his lil town, befriending cute animals and decorating his house. A cozy game for him to relax too! He spend hundreds of hours getting everything and making his dream house! When it comes to villagers, he lets them come and go as he pleases. He, Layer, Cinnamon and Massimo have island hang outs at Weekends, visiting the other’s island and helping eachother out it’s lovely.

Subnautica, the deep underwater exploration and studying the life that lives on. It’s eerie and at times stressful but it intrigues him deeply. It’s one of those games that he introduced to Marty and she is in love of it. She often with him on the couch together, watching him the play game as Marty happily gushes the sea life and needs out over it. He loves hearing her yap about it, when the gargantuan leviathan popped out of nowhere he screamed while Marty is even happier, that’s a big baby!

Phoenix Wright, another puzzle game! He found out about it, because he knew that Professor Layton had a crossover with it so he decides to give it a try. He enjoyed it! It was a critique of the Justice system (that he’s 100% behind it of critiquing governing power systems). But the characters were absurd and the story was a bit bonkers but at the end he enjoys them. Even more of watching his friends reach to the nonsense of how wild these cases they are. Very frustrated that Maya keeps getting framed and imprisoned for unnecessary reasons. It leaves him baffled that Phoenix keeps getting into these near death experiences and walking away from these without injury. Edgedworth investigations is a relief to him cause finally someone using common sense.

Cooking Mama, ITS SELF EXPLANATORY OKAY!?

Stardrew Valley- it’s another cozy game that he enjoys. Sometimes being a farmer in a quant village is nice and he enjoys the events that follow.

He rarely game first person shooter games but hearing Axl scream on the other side of the room after being sniped at a long distance is incredibly satisfying to hear.

Mario games are neat for him, like platformers are a hit or miss for him but his first Mario game was Oddessy, so the exploration is fun and intuitive for him. Other games are pretty fun too (Wonder and Paper Mario TYD are one of his favorites.

Fuga Melodies of Steel, yep it’s one of those games that he screams and cries. The story hits him so hard, especially the fact that these children had to man a massive Tank going through war as they try to save their loved ones. He loves these children to death seeing their personalities, desires and quirks, they endeared him. It hurts him so deeply, he’s impressed how it was mature to handle the realities of War what it does to people. Let me tell you once he finds out and witness what the soul cannon does he was on his knees, the guilt and horror of sacrificing a child’s life to save others gutted him harder than Sigma’s lasted blast- Zero walked in to him staring at the screen for hours while tears where streaming on his face of what he has done.

He restarted his save file and ensured no child will ever be used to fire that a cursed weapon.

He was extremely relieved that they changed how the soul cannon worked and it doesn’t sacrifice their lives him. He loved reading about the lore of this game and the fact that it was humanity were responsible of their own downfall doesn’t surprise him-

Despite the horrors of wars and tragedies the children marched on, holding on to hope for a better tomorrow. A sentiment that he’s grateful for.

[msclaritea]

The British Empire Was Much Worse Than You Realize | The New Yorker

March 28, 2022

A red lion from the British royal coat of arms holding a globe.

Liberal imperialism, Caroline Elkins argues, gained resilience from its ability to absorb and neutralize objections. Illustration by Ben Jones

"At the height of the British Empire, just after the First World War, an island smaller than Kansas controlled roughly a quarter of the world’s population and landmass. To the architects of this colossus, the largest empire in history, each conquest was a moral achievement. Imperial tutelage, often imparted through the barrel of an Enfield, was delivering benighted peoples from the errors of their ways—child marriage, widow immolation, headhunting. Among the edifiers was a Devonshire-born rector’s son named Henry Hugh Tudor. Hughie, as he was known to Winston Churchill and his other chums, pops up so reliably in colonial outposts with outsized body counts that his story can seem a “Where’s Waldo?” of empire.

He’s Churchill’s garrison-mate in Bangalore in 1895—a time of “messes and barbarism,” the future Prime Minister complained in a note to his mum. As the century turns, Tudor is battling Boers on the veldt; then it’s back to India, and on to occupied Egypt. Following a decorated stint as a smoke-screen artist in the trenches of the First World War, he’s in command of a gendarmerie, nicknamed Tudor’s Toughs, that opens fire in a Dublin stadium in 1920—an assault during a search for I.R.A. assassins which leaves dozens of civilians dead or wounded. Prime Minister David Lloyd George delights in rumors that Tudor’s Toughs were killing two Sinn Féinners for every murdered loyalist. Later, even the military’s chief of staff marvelled at how nonchalantly the men spoke of those killings, tallying them up as though they were runs in a cricket match; Tudor and his “scallywags” were out of control. It didn’t matter: Churchill, soon to be Secretary of State for the Colonies, had Tudor’s back.

Imperial subjects, of course, sometimes found their own solutions to such problems. A hard-line British field marshal, atop the I.R.A. hit list, was gunned down in Belgravia in 1922. Tudor, worried he would be next, made himself scarce. By the following year, he and his Irish paramilitaries were propagating their tactics for suppressing natives in the British-controlled Mandate of Palestine, Churchill having decided that the violence-prone Tudor was just the fellow to train the colonial police. A letter from Tudor to Churchill that I recently came across crystallizes all the insouciance, cynicism, greed, callousness, and errant judgment of empire. He opens by telling Churchill that he’s just commanded his troops to slaughter Adwan Bedouins who had been marching on Amman to protest high taxes levied on them by their notoriously extravagant emir. This tribe was “invariably friendly to Great Britain,” Tudor writes, a touch ruefully. But, he adds, “politics are not my affair.”

Tudor had cheery news to impart, too. Not only could the Mandate be a “wonderful tourist country,” but prospectors had discovered vast sums’ worth of potash in the Dead Sea valley. Should Britain appropriate the resources and increase the policing budget, its difficulties in the region would “smooth out,” he told Churchill, assuring him that Palestinians would be easier to pacify than the Irish: “They are a different people, and it’s unlikely that the Arab if handled firmly will ever do much more than agitate and talk.”

In the twentieth century’s hierarchy of state-sponsored violence, Hitler’s Germany, Stalin’s Russia, and Hirohito’s Japan typically take top spots. The actions of a few European empires have invited harsh scrutiny, too—Belgium’s conduct in Congo, France’s in Algeria, and Portugal’s in Angola and Mozambique. Britain is rarely seen as among the worst offenders, given a reputation for decency that the Harvard historian Caroline Elkins has spent more than two decades trying to undermine. “Legacy of Violence” (Knopf), her astringent new history of the British Empire, brings detailed context to individual stories like Tudor’s. Visiting archives in a dozen countries over four continents, examining hundreds of oral histories, and drawing on the work of social historians and political theorists, Elkins traces the Empire’s arc across centuries and theatres of crisis. As the sole imperial power that remained a liberal democracy throughout the twentieth century, Britain claimed to be distinct from Europe’s colonial powers in its commitment to bringing rule of law, enlightened principles, and social progress to its colonies. Elkins contends that Britain’s use of systematic violence was no better than that of its rivals. The British were simply more skilled at hiding it."

[redheadedwhat]

See How We Shine

I had no idea what to title this, also it has not been beta'd so feel free to point out anything I messed up or tell me if I'm confusing.

-----

Wake up. Take vitamins. Get ready. Eat. Leave.

It was a simple enough routine, but it had taken Minnie ages to perfect it. Something about the quiet in her home made it difficult to concentrate after years of living in chaos. She was used to her mother shaking the bottle of vitamins in her face to remind her to take them. She was used to her brothers shouting at one another about anything and everything and her father shouting at them for shouting. She was used to loud laughter and music and lovingly-made threats. She was used to living with people. 

She’d been alone for almost two years ever since her mother had passed away. Mom had been the only one keeping Minnie’s brothers in the country so once she was gone they’d decided to go back to their native Ireland. Her father had tried to stick around for a bit, but eventually he followed his sons, telling Minnie it would be safer for her to stay in Hawkins. Sure, it wasn’t exactly legal to leave a 16 year old alone, but as long as she told anyone that asked that her father was working on the road and didn’t draw too much attention to herself dear old dad figured no one would find out. And no one did. People in small towns were notoriously nosy, but the folks in Hawkins seemed to prefer ignoring the obvious.

Even after she’d turned 18 she’d continued to dodge questions about her home life. Not lying exactly, but not entirely telling the truth either. Telling people her father was out of town was not technically a lie, she just neglected to mention that he hadn’t been in town in the first place. 

She was all set financially, the house was paid off and her father sent her money every two weeks. Her brothers also sent some every time they felt guilty for leaving her all alone. All of that on top of the life insurance and the money the family had recieved from her mothers 'workplace-related fatality' ("Proper safety protocols were not followed" was all her father would say on the matter.) meant that Minnie would want for nothing. Materially, at least. The house was still cold and quiet. All the money in the world wouldn't change that.

She was snapped out of her thoughts by an alarm going off in the kitchen. Multiple alarms were key to her routine and this one meant it was time for school. She grabbed two lunches from the fridge and made her way to her car. 

About 20 minutes later she pulled into her parking spot, hopping out to knock on the door of the smoke-filled van parked next to her. The window rolled down and out popped a head of curly brown hair.

“Mouse!” Eddie greeted her, his big brown eyes friendly but sleepy. “I got here before you? I must be losing my touch.” 

She pulled the extra lunch out of her bag and dropped it through his open window without a word. 

Eddie’s eyes lit up as he opened the brown paper bag and perused its contents. “How do you always know when I’m gonna forget my lunch?” 

“I just know stuff,” she shrugged. That was her answer to most questions of that nature. Her mother had always said she was very intuitive. 

Eddie accepted her answer without further questioning, used to it by now. He jumped out of his van and threaded his arm through hers, leading her into the school. 

“You sitting in on Hellfire tonight, my dear?” He asked as they went through the front doors. “You make the freshman very nervous and it really adds to the atmosphere.” 

“I don’t make them nervous.” She protested, letting him open up her locker for her. He always had the combination to her lockers, given her tendency to forget the numbers and the fact that he barely used his own, it worked out for both of them. 

“I beg to differ, the tall kid looked like he wanted to pass out when you were talking to him last week.” Eddie insisted, storing his newly-acquired lunch in her locker to pick up later.

“That’s only because I showed him the drawing of that monster I saw in my yard a few years back.” Minnie explained, “It must have creeped him out.” 

Eddie just nodded, not entirely buying that story. Though he liked to think he knew her pretty well he had to admit that he couldn’t always tell if she was fucking with him or not. She would often say weird things and spout borderline conspiracy theories like: There was a monster in my backyard, we’re going to lose a planet in our solar system, the government is doing secret human experimentation. Some of it she definitely believed, but he was sure she said some of it to try to confuse him. 

She slammed the locker shut, pulling Eddie back to the present. “Anyway, I promised I would help paint sets for the drama club after school.” 

Eddie dramatically clutched his hands to his chest, falling back against the lockers behind him. “You’re breaking my heart here, Mouse!”

“You’ll live,” she tried to hide her smile, but knew she was failing. 

Eddie’s loud and eccentric personality was exactly what she’d been missing in the quiet confines of her home. She never actually said the words, but she credited him with keeping her somewhat sane during the last few years. As crazy and chaotic as he was, he was someone she could count on. 

“You can come to mine after D&D if you’d like.” She offered impulsively, “Dad won’t be home this weekend.” Technically not a lie. 

“Ms. Mouse!” He gasped comically, “Are you offering to take me back to your empty, secluded house for the weekend? Whatever are you going to do to me? ” 

Minne rolled her eyes and walked past him, declining to give him an answer. 

“I didn’t say I wasn’t into it!” Eddie called after her retreating form. 

She continued her walk to class waving a hand without turning back. Her house would definitely not be cold and quiet this weekend. 

-----

I'm still not entirely sure when I want this set, so I kept some things a bit vague.

Thank you to @lj127 for asking to be tagged! I'm glad you liked it and I hope the tag actually works.

[rocorambles]

Reassurance

Pairing: Sakusa x Reader

Genre/Warnings: NSFW, Spanking, Atsumu’s a jealous asshole

Summary: Atsumu annoying Sakusa isn’t anything new, but when the blond setter says something that hits a little too close to home, you’re there to reassure your dark haired lover and remind him that he’s the only one for you. 

Author’s Note: The original request was for reader to have a fwb relationship with Sakusa, but in the spirit of Valentine’s day and desire for slightly softer Sakusa content (although it’s still pretty rough sex OOPS), I have them officially dating in this story. 

Miya Atsumu is a thorn in Sakusa's side, a fact that doesn't surprise anyone on the MSBY Jackals. But usually there's a slight playfulness to their bickering, a taunting smirk thrown in to take off the razor sharp edges of their vicious words that Bokuto and Hinata nervously laugh at and that Meian rolls his eyes at before they all resume practice. 

Not today however and Bokuto grits his teeth as he holds Sakusa back with all his strength, a worried look in usually carefree eyes, as Hinata wraps his wiry arms around Atsumu and practically tackles the fiery setter to the floor, as Meian sternly shouts at both players to calm down, strategically placing himself between their thrashing bodies as they fight against their human restraints and bare their fangs at each other. 

The team adores you and how can Sakusa blame them when he himself fell head over heels for you in a way he never thought was possible? So he just fondly looks on as Bokuto and Hinata look at you with star-filled eyes and ignores the harmless subtle looks Meian sneaks at you when you appear at practices, matches, and team outings. It's harder to ignore Atsumu's blatant leering stares, but the blonde setter never makes an outright disrespectful move other than flirtatious comments here and there, so as irritating as it is, Sakusa doesn't say a word for the sake of the team. 

But today he had gone too far and although it wasn't the first time Atsumu had openly raved about how breathtakingly attractive you are in the team locker room whenever you posted a new picture on social media, it is the first time he has openly denounced your relationship and everyone freezes at the setter's scornful words when he questions what you see in Sakusa. 

Even the team airheads quiet down, but Atsumu continues prattling on about how he would treat you so much better than Sakusa, how you deserve more than some frigid germaphobe, seemingly unaware of the growing tension in the air, the cold fury in dark eyes as Sakusa stares him down. But then he looks Sakusa dead in the eyes, not a hint of a joke in his disdainful gaze, and all hell breaks loose as Sakusa lunges at his sneering teammate. 

Despite how aloof Sakusa comes off as, he’s not completely oblivious to his own reputation and how cold he comes off as to others. He sees the skepticism in other’s eyes when the two of you walk out and about. He hears the doubtful mutterings as people wonder if he’s even capable of being a caring boyfriend. And the worst part of it all is that they aren’t wrong. 

He is irritable. He isn’t friendly. He’s not a great communicator. And the thought of intimately touching anyone had always turned him off to the point where even he himself wondered if he was destined to be alone. Until he met you. 

Women are pretty enough. He can admit that, not a stranger to appreciatively looking at an attractive female who asks him for his signature after a game. But skin on skin contact with a stranger? Holding a conversation about meaningless small talk? Out of the question and dating wasn’t something he even remotely considered as he focused on volleyball and being part of the future Japan National Team that would bring the country its first volleyball gold medal. 

And then you had swung into his life out of nowhere, turning his world and opinions upside down and for the first time he found himself wanting to get to know you better, talk with you. 

It hadn’t been easy, figuring out how to make a relationship work and in his defense, you’re his first girlfriend. But he grimaces when he looks back at the arguments the two of you used to have, the tears in your eyes when you asked him if he even cared about you, were you so disgusting that he couldn’t even bear touching you, the hurt in your eyes when he chose to stay silent instead of tell you how he really feels. And he groans when he remembers how his own damned pride had refused to budge, refused to allow himself to be vulnerable to you, refused to meet you in the middle. 

But when you had come to him, defeated, a slump in your shoulders as you asked him if he wanted to just end things, he had clawed and torn his pride to shreds, love and fear of losing you overcoming his constraints and the two of you began anew, communicating and working together to create a joint journey. It’s an amazing relationship despite the slight spats the two of you still sometimes have, but that doesn’t mean doubt and insecurity don’t brush the edges of his mind every now and then when he feels like he’s failed you as a partner. 

Damn Atsumu and his ability to stick his claws where it really hurts. 

Needless to say, both Atsumu and him are promptly kicked out of the gym after both receiving an earful from Meian about their unprofessional behavior and an affectionate but stern slap to both their heads as their captain orders them to go cool down and start practice on a fresh new page tomorrow. 

And he knows he should take the wise advice, should walk around, maybe jog, let the fresh air calm the turbulent storm inside of him calm before he returns to you, but doubt and uncertainty drag him to your front door and before he can even register what’s happening, he’s pounding relentlessly on the wood until you open it up for him and stare at him with surprised wide doe eyes. 

“Kiyoomi? You’re really early. I haven’t even started prepping for dinner yet-”

Your words falter as you’re brusquely pushed against the wall of your foyer, the front door slamming shut behind your lover and you yelp when lips come crashing against yours, almost painfully so. Bewildered you almost have half a mind to shove him off and have him explain what’s going on, but then he’s pulling away himself, calloused hands clutching the fabric of your shirt tightly, and your chest tightens at the distraught desperation in normally calm eyes. 

“Kiyoomi? Is everything okay?” 

You moan as he kisses you once again, more tenderly than before, but passionate enough that you’re gasping for breath when he finally pulls away and you melt into his tight embrace as strong arms wrap around you and hold you tight to him. 

“I just need you. Now.”

And how could you possibly deny that intense stare as dark eyes pin you down? 

Intimacy with Sakusa is usually premeditated, process-oriented, starting with a thorough cleanse in the shower and both of you neatly folding and piling your clothes safely in a corner before falling into bed with each other. Nothing like this and your heart races as you’re being dragged through the house and literally tossed onto the bed with so much impact you bounce back, only to be held still once more as Sakusa’s hands scramble to remove your clothing, almost tearing your outfit in the process as he haphazardly tosses them somewhere to the side. 

You want to tell him he can relax, that you’re not going anywhere, but before you can soothe him you squeal as you’re pressed against the bedsheets, a mouth hungrily kissing and sucking dark bruising marks all over your neck, your collarbone, body writhing as two hands cover your breasts, kneading and rolling your nipples between dexterous fingers. And suddenly you don’t want him to take it down a notch after all, your hips arching up and insistently rubbing against him in a desperate plea for more that he’s quick to answer by grinding his own groin down against you. 

It’s desperate, pathetic, two grown adults humping each other like animals, but neither of you can get enough of it and you’re embarrassingly close to cumming just like that, lewd moans filling the air as you succumb to the combined assault of his body, mouth, and hands. But you indignantly whine when he abruptly pulls away, shocking you back to attention when the cold air pierces you without his body covering yours. And Sakusa smirks at the way your whining turns into a yelp as he easily drags you to the edge of the bed by your ankles until your legs dangle off the mattress, a glint in his eyes when he sees how you nervously swallow at the sight of him kneeling between your legs, his fingers teasingly positioned at your inner thighs. 

Sakusa has talented hands, a fact that’s well known to anyone who’s a part of the Japanese Volleyball Association, but you wonder if they could ever imagine just how much more multifaceted his gift truly is and you let out a high-pitched keen as he glides two fingers inside of you, twisting his notoriously flexible wrists in a way that instantly has you seeing stars as he reaches and drags against places inside of you that you never even knew existed. You’re dripping and you wince at the lewd slick sounds you hear as he relentlessly explores and ruins you, shyly biting your lip when you vaguely think about how Sakusa abhors the mess of sex, and you make to gently push him away from you, reassuring him that he doesn’t need to go through with this. 

But you startle at the animalistic snarl directed at you, unable to do anything else except slump back down on the rumpled sheets, desperately digging your nails into the fabric surrounding you when he adds a third finger and increases his pace, twisting and turning, plunging even deeper inside of you. It’s overwhelming and you know you’re dangerously close to the edge already, head thrashing side to side as little mewls and whimpers slip past your lips, but then your back is arching, mouth gaping wide open as lips wrap around your clit and you scream as they suck on the engorged bud, convulsing and gushing even more as you dive headfirst into your first orgasm of the night. 

Your body is still shaking, eyes still in the back of your head, but you whimper, trying frantically to ground yourself as a hand firmly grasps your chin and urges you to gaze into dark eyes. 

“Tell me how good that felt.” 

“So good, Kiyoomi. So so good.” 

Your voice is slurred, mouth thick and heavy with exhaustion, but your word are good enough for now and you weakly cry as you’re suddenly being turned over, forced to slump down onto your stomach and chest, arms splayed out in front of you as your face rests on the bed, shaky legs barely holding your lower body up as you’re now forced to stand and bend over the edge of your bed. 

You’re not sure how much longer you can keep this position up, but arousal churns inside of you once more when you take a second to realize the position you’re in, ass and glistening pussy on full display for your boyfriend, reduced to nothing but a pair of holes as you bend over and present like a slut. And you whimper, ass automatically pressing back and shaking in want as hands grab onto your hips and something hard grinds against you. 

Any other time you’d be embarrassed to display such wanton behavior in front of your more reserved lover, but it seems like Sakusa is just as impatient as you and you claw at the sheets, grappling for purchase when he slams balls deep inside of you in one swift motion. He doesn’t give you time to adjust, not that you need much assistance considering how drenched your pussy already is, and you wail as he starts up a brutal pace, fingers digging into your skin as he holds you still while his hips thrust back and forth.

The pleasure is mind numbing and you can feel the sheets underneath you begin to soak with your drool as your jaw remains slack. But you need more and one of your hands slips down between your legs, searching for the little bud at the apex of your thighs, only to be briskly slapped away and you turn your head to complain, only to collapse back down and scream in the sheets as Sakusa swiftly replaces your wandering digits, rubbing and circling your clit. 

Your legs are trembling, stomach tightening as something hot coils and slithers inside of you, body tensing as arousal builds up to a crescendo inside of you, the lewd sounds of Sakusa’s balls slapping against your ass with every thrust echoing throughout. But as you teeter totter on the edge once again, you’re dragged back to the present when a hand sharply smacks your ass. 

“Who’s making you feel this good?”

“You, Kiyoomi! You!”

“Can anyone else make you feel this way?”

You can barely register the words, struggling to make sense of the questions he’s suddenly pouncing on you, desperate for release and being used. But you’re silent for too long and you howl as you’re punished with two more harsh smacks. 

“Answer me.” 

“NO! No one except you. Kiyoomi, please, please, please, please…”

You’re babbling at this point, incoherent wanton ravings of more, please, and Kiyoomi drowning the air, and you think you might start sobbing in pain and denial if he doesn’t give you what you want, willing to degrade and lower yourself to pleading and begging. But Sakusa takes mercy on you, satisfied with your answers, and you gratefully begin to loudly moan again as he chases his own end, dragging you along with him. And all it takes is a few more stuttered thrusts and more coaxing of your clit to have you falling apart underneath him once again, and the clenching and convulsing of your tight soft walls has him tumbling down after you, painting your insides white. 

You really do begin to collapse to the ground this time, trembling legs unable to stand anymore, but strong arms are there to catch you and your body goes limp in relief as you’re gently laid fully onto the bed and pressed against a comforting warm hold as Sakusa lays beside you, letting you nestle further into him and tuck your head under his chin in a way that makes you feel safe and loved. 

It’s a few moments before you can even begin to reassemble yourself, but when you do, it’s your turn to nudge a handsome face into making eye contact with you and you gently pepper Sakusa’s face with soft butterfly kisses as you urge him to finally explain what all that was about, reassuring the guilty and embarrassed countenance that it’s fine, both of you are fine, and everything is going to be fine, no matter what he says. 

You listen attentively, stroking long wavy locks as he hesitantly tells you about the incident in details, scowling and holding your lover even more fiercely to yourself when he repeats Atsumu’s vicious words, murmuring reassurances to him about how you only have eyes for him and even if you ever did leave him (you wince when he glares and bodily wraps around you like a serpent), it sure as hell wouldn’t be for a snot-nosed arrogant prick like Miya Atsumu. 

He loosens his grip on you, appeased by the way you affectionately drown him in kisses and nuzzles as he continues on to recount the rest of the day’s events, but he stares askance at you when you burst into laughter as he tells you about the fight that had almost broken out, that he had almost started, peering at you questioningly and unamused, unsure what you could possibly find so funny about the situation or his atrocious handling of the matter. 

And then he’s full on glaring at you as you relentlessly tease him for his childish impassioned reaction to Atsumu’s bitter words, mockingly cooing at him and fluttering your lashes as you call him your big strong hero, breaking into disbelieving cackles every once in a while when you imagine your mature, level headed lover trying to get into a fist fight over some silly words a stupid brat had said. 

But you’re not laughing when you’re suddenly being pinned on your back again, a surprised yelp forced from you as Sakusa sharply nips your earlobe before irritatedly staring you down. 

“Clearly I didn’t work you over well enough if you have enough energy to laugh and make a fool out of me. Let’s change that, shall we?”

[todaysdocument]

#InternationalHolocaustRemembranceDay

CW: this post contains descriptions of, and links to, images of dead bodies. 

In May of 1945, an American medic was quartered in the recently liberated Dachau concentration camp. He wrote this letter to his parents detailing what he saw there.  

Letter: https://catalog.archives.gov/id/1055429

“. . . while we expected things to be grizzly, I'm sure none of us knew what was coming. It is easy to read about atrocities, but they must be seen before they can be believed.”

“But as we came to the center of the city, we met a train with a wrecked engine - about fifty cars long. Every car was loaded with bodies! There must have been thousands of them - all obviously starved to death.”

Photo: https://catalog.archives.gov/id/849160

“ . . . when we reached the furnace house we came upon a huge stack of corpses piled up like kindling, all nude so that their clothes wouldn't be wasted by the burning. ”

Photo: https://catalog.archives.gov/id/176250334

“Outside, in addition to a huge mound of charred bone fragments, were the carefully sorted and stacked clothes of the victims - which obviously numbered in the thousands. Although I stood there looking at it, I couldn't believe it.” 

Photo: https://catalog.archives.gov/id/531288

Transcription of letter:

[handwritten 1] Waffen-SS SS-Standortkommandantur Dachau

140 Dachau 3, den Fernruf Dachau 293 [crossed out] 7 April 1945 7 May 1945

Dear Mother and Father,

You have, by this time, received a letter mentioning that I am quartered in the concentration camp at Dachau. It is still undecided whether we will be permitted to describe the conditions here, but I'm writing this now to tell you a little, and will mail it later when we are told we can. It is difficult to know how to begin. By this time I have recovered from my first emotional shock and am able to write without screaming like a hysterical gibbering idiot. Yet, I know you will hesitate to believe me no matter how objective and factual I try to be. I even find myself trying to deny what I am looking at with my own eyes. Certainly, what I have seen in the past few days will offset my personality for the rest of my life. We knew a day or two before we moved that we were going to operate in Dachau, and that it was the location of one of the most notorious concentration camps, but while we expected things to be grizzly, I'm sure none of us knew what was coming. It is easy to read about atrocities, but they must be seen before they can be believed. To think that I once scoffed at Valtin's book "Out of the Night" as being preposterous! I've seen worse

[handwritten 2] Waffen-SS SS-Standortkommandantur   Dachau 3, den Dachau   Fernruf Dachau 293

Betreff: [handwritten] nights than any he described. [cutoff ezug] The trip south from Öttingen was pleasant enough. We passed through Donauworth and Aichach and as we entered Dachau, the  [in pencil in the margin: Bavarian Alps] country, with the cottages, river, Anlagen: country estates and Alps in the distance, was almost like a tourist resort. But as we came to the center of the city, we met a train with a wrecked engine - about fifty cars long. Every car was loaded with bodies. There must have been thousands of them - all obviously starved to death. This was a shock of the first order, and the odor can best be immagined. But neither the sight nor the odor were anything when compared with what we were still to see. [in pencil: E] Marc Coyle reached the camp two days before I did and was a guard so as soon as I got there I looked him up and he took me to the crematory. Dead SS troopers were scattered around the grounds, but when we reached the furnace house we came upon a huge stack of corpses piled up like kindling, all nude so that their clothes wouldn't be wasted by the burning. There were furnaces for burning six bodies at once, and on each side of them was a room twenty feet square crammed to the ceiling with more bodies - one big stinking rotten mess. Their faces

[handwritten 3] Waffen-SS SS-Standortkommandantur   Dachau 3, den Dachau   Fernruf Dachau 293 Betreff: purple, their eyes popping, and with a hideous grin on each one. They were nothing but bones & skin. Coyle had assisted at ten autopsies the day before (wearing a gas mask) on ten bodies selected at random. Bezug: Eight of them had advanced T.B., all had typhus and extreme malnutrition symptoms. There were both women and children in the stack in addition to the men. Anlagen: While we were inspecting the place, freed prisoners drove up with wagon loads of corpses removed from the compound proper. Watching the unloading was horrible. The bodies squooshed and gurgled as they hit the pile and the odor could almost be seen. Behind the furnaces was the execution chamber, a windowless cell twenty feet square with gas nozzles every few feet across the ceiling. Outside, in addition to a huge mound of charred bone fragments, were the carefully sorted and stacked clothes of the victims - which obviously numbered in the thousands. Although I stood there looking at it, I couldn't believe it. The realness of the whole mess is just gradually dawning on me, and I doubt if it ever will on you.

[handwritten 4] Waffen-SS SS-Standortkommandantur   Dachau 3, den Dachau   Fernruf Dachau 293 There is a rumor circulating which says that the war is over. It probably is - as much as it ever will be. We've all been expecting the end for several days, but were not too excited about it because we know that it does not Betreff: mean too much as far as our immediate situation is concerned. There was no celebration - it's difficult to celebrate anything with the morbid state we're in. Bezug: The Pacific theater will not come immediately for this unit; we have around 36,000 potential and eventual patients here. The end of the work for everyone else is going to be just the beginning for us. Anlagen: Today was a scorching hot day after several rainy cold ones. The result of the heat on the corpses is impossible to describe, and the situation will probably get worse because their disposal will certainly take time. My arm is sore from a typhus shot so I'm ending here for the present. More will follow later. I have lots to write about now. Love, Harold

[shurisneakers]

shut in [7]

Summary: When your high profile mission goes terribly wrong, you’re forced to hide in a safehouse with a man you’ve never met before. With seemingly nowhere else to go, you’re forced to work together to figure out who is trying to have you assassinated before it’s too late. (Sam Wilson x Reader, Hitman AU)

Warnings: cursing, implied abuse, death, implied ptsd, injuries, broken bone, origami and paper planes

Word count: 3.7k

A/N: ONE MORE WEEK !!!!!!!!! ONE MORE WEEK !!!!!!!! also gif is somewhat related except steve isn’t there sorry to crush any hopes

i also appreciate feedback so if you would like to, please consider dropping me an ask or comment ly guys!! also if you want to be on the taglist, it’s mentioned at the bottom of the chapter.

here’s my ko-fi if you’d like to support my writing <333

Previous Part || Shut In Masterlist

“Is there a reason you’re back so early?”

Both of the men nervously glanced at each other, silently urging the other to talk. A quiet form of encouragement.

“We chec- we checked all the neighbouring towns. All your safehouses,” one of them finally sputtered up after his partner elbowed him in the ribs.

“And?”

“We coordinated with all our guys across the country to look for them-”

“All I’m hearing are a bunch of excuses,” they twirled the gun on its barrel like it was a plaything. “Get to the point.”

“No one knows where they’re hiding,” he finished, swallowing thickly. “We’re still looking though. We just thought-”

“What?” their voice was surprisingly calm. “That your little status update would impress me? That I’d feel sorry for you for working so hard?”

“N-no boss,” his partner finally pitched in, saving face for his companion who opened and shut his mouth wordlessly. “Just keeping you in the loop. We’re close, I can feel-”

“Do you remember what I told you the last time you were here?”

Both of them shut their mouths immediately. Knuckles white, nails digging into their skin as they clenched their fists shut.

“That you wanted them dead,” the first one said with faux confidence. A waver in his voice gave it away.

“Yes, but you’re forgetting the important part,” they tsk’ed, shaking their head, eyes downcast.

They didn’t give anyone a chance to react. They slammed the gun down, swiftly picking it up before taking aim at his partner’s face.

“I said I’d blow your brains out.” They pulled the trigger.

Bits of bone fragment and blood splattered across the first agent’s face. He inhaled sharply, chest rising and falling haphazardly. He had his eyes shut tightly, face away from the carcass slumped over next to him..

“I want every fucking part of this country searched,” they roared, throwing the gun to the side carelessly, leaving someone else to scurry after it. “And since it’s so fucking hard for you to finish two tasks, just get me their location.”

The agent barely nodded, looking like he was about to throw up. His partner’s blood trailed down the side of his face like sweat.

“I’ll kill them myself.”

Hugh Grant was starting to look less appealing on your 6th rewatch of Notting Hill. In fact, he was starting to blend together with the characters from Die Hard and it was becoming difficult to differentiate which part belonged to which movie.

Sam sat opposite to you at the dining table, a set of papers assigned in front of him. The TV was left on, serving as background noise and occasional fillers to substitute the lack of conversation.

“That movie is not making sense anymore,” he stated objectively.

“It stopped after the third time for me.” Your words were hushed, your focus remaining on the swan you were trying to create from scratch.

“If I hear her say ‘I’m just a girl, standing in front of a boy’ one more time, I actually think I’ll projectile vomit.” You could tell that his eyes didn’t shift from the screen though. “I can feel the bile. It’s going to happen.”

You only hummed in agreement, more interested in his lamenting than the actual movie.

Although origami wasn’t one of the skills you picked up in the fucking mafia, you still knew a few basic things. The rest you just folded with confidence and prayed it would work.

What other options did you have when you were stuck together in a house with no WiFi?

Sam had made a paper bowl to hold the car keys and the few dollars you picked up from Pierce’s place. It looked like it would fall apart at any given moment, its structural integrity questionable at best.

You had made a small flower that rested on the table in front of you. You were sure it would go missing the minute a draft entered the room.

He had given up after his contribution of the bowl. Apparently his creative expertise extended only towards that and paper airplanes, not that that stopped him. He was folding and manufacturing them with a vengeance.

“How is this supposed to help, Wilson?” you questioned, unable to contain the smile that grew on your face at the sheer number of planes he was making.

“Just because it’s not a decorative marvel-” he shot back in its defence, “-doesn’t mean it’s useless.”

“Oh, yeah? What else can it do other than not fly?” You watched as he launched one of them. It did a loop before falling miserably to the floor.

“Hey, you can put a message in it. Maybe one of those button trackers, a microphone. The possibilities are endless.” He laughed, folding another one out of the limited supply of paper he had left. “Besides, your thing won’t even lift off the ground.”

“Yeah, but this one can float.” You held up the swan that you had created. That about concluded your knowledge of origami.

“That’s actually… pretty cool,” he admitted. “Teach me how to make one.”

“A true master never reveals their secrets,” you eluded, placing it on the table.

“I dare you to make another.” Sneaky bastard. He knew you wouldn’t be able to replicate it. He saw you struggle the first time.

“Why, so you can just copy off of me?” you dodged, and Sam narrowed his eyes at you. You followed the same.

Neither of you blinked for a while.

“I’m out of paper,” he finally relented, gesturing to the fleet of planes that littered the table.

“I’m out of ideas.” You paused, looking down at how you’d spent the last hour. “Do you wanna go test these outside later?”

Sam looked up eagerly and you could just tell he was intending on getting competitive. “Hell yeah.”

“I’m going for a run in some time.” You got up to stretch your limbs, shrug off the fatigue that was setting in. Along the way you left the swan and one of the paper planes on top of the mini fridge alongside the car keys. It was cute. “We could do it then?”

“Sure,” he affirmed. “What time?”

“At around 6-” your eyes landed on the clock on the wall before widening, “-shit, shit, shit, I didn't realise it was five thirty. We have a call with Ransone.”

“Phone’s on the couch,” he mentioned to the living room, sitting up straight. “Why are you freaking out? We still got a few minutes to go.”

You pushed yourself away from the table, forcing yourself to shakie off the drowsiness that had begun to set in.

“You wouldn’t get it,” you mumbled, “He gets pissy if I don’t do things his way.”

You grabbed the phone, punching in the buttons and having it at the ready.

You noticed Sam focused on you with knitted eyebrows but not voicing whatever he had on his mind.

“Ready?” you questioned, but more as a formality. You had to do it regardless.

He simply nodded, looking on as you let the phone ring. If he had noticed your antsiness towards the call, he didn’t bring it up.

Ransone picked up on the last ring, not skipping a beat in answering, “Y/N.”

“Hey Ransone.” You switched the call to speakerphone.

“Are you alone?”

You glanced at Sam. He shook his head, arms crossed over his chest, edging you to continue with the arrangement you had planned the day prior.

Ransone trusted you more. He was more likely to communicate openly if Sam wasn’t around.

“Yeah, I am.”

“Where’s the other one?”

Sam silently scoffed.

“He’s taking a nap.”

“Ah,” Ransone’s tone was condescending. “How have things been?”

“It’s fine.” You press your lips into a straight line, not elucidating. “What’s the update out there?”

“Everything is a mess. We’re trying to figure out who attacked you but since there wasn’t anything left behind or any kind of trace, it’s proving to be... inconvenient.”

“Is it safe to travel?”

“What, with your face on national television?” he laughed. “Nah, I’d say it’s a little too early to be thinkin’ of a road trip. Just stay where you are, I’ll tell you when you can come out.”

Your fingers were thrumming at the table rhythmically, peeking at Sam every now and then for anything he found suspicious or wanted you to ask about.

“Listen, we’ve paid off every big guy to keep this under wraps as much as possible but Pierce was an important person. All the higher ups want this to be solved as quickly as possible. They don’t care about sacrificing a player here or there.”

Pinning the blame on you was easy enough. The faster you were put away, the faster they could stage an “accident” in prison so that none of their secrets were exposed. Wasn’t like they hadn’t done it before.

“Others in the business aren’t likin’ us accusing them of attacking one of our own. Our best bet right now is Serpentine but we haven’t gotten anything to prove it.”

You doubted they ever would. Even if they did do it, Serpentine was notorious for being cunning and stealthy in their operations. They made sure there would be no tracks leading back to them.

“So, we’re at a dead-end,” you verified. There was no telling when this would end, your exit looking further and further away. “We’re fucked.”

“No. We’ll just- Y/N, listen to me,” Ransone called out, drawing your attention back to the call.

“Yeah?”

“I’ve always protected you,” his voice was noticeably softer. “Don’t you trust me?”

You felt the temperature in the room drop.

“You said there would be no one there!”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Ransone scoffed. “I never said that.”

“I walk in there and there’s four people, completely armed.” Forcing yourself to recall it was making your head spin. Maybe you could ask the nurse for a painkiller. “It was supposed to be empty.”

“I think the blood loss is making you delirious,” he chided, looking at the bag of drips hanging above your bed. “It wasn’t even that bad-”

“You’re lying.” The words slipped out before you had the chance to think it over.

“Excuse me?” he tilted his head, tone suddenly sifting to that of warning.

You knew he was. You had agreed to this mission because it was supposed to be easy. It was a break.

“Ivan was there when you briefed me.” You lifted your good arm to point at him shakily. “He knows you’re lying.”

“Does he now?” Ransone quirked an eyebrow, studying his aid who stood in the corner of the dingy hospital room.

A beat of silence passed where Ransone stared at Ivan, waiting for a reply of confirmation.

Ivan only lifted his shoulders in unawareness. “I don’t remember you sayin’ that.”

Your mouth fell agape but you quickly rushed to shut it. Fucking liars. You shouldn’t have expected anything better.

“Told you.” Ransone shrugged. “You’re a smart one, Y/N, so I’m going to let that slide this time. But next time you accuse me of something I didn’t say…”

He trailed off, resting a hand on your broken shoulder. You flinched, jaw clenched so tightly you thought your teeth might break. You tried to imagine yourself somewhere else, desperate to reduce the quivering of your body when he squeezed it lightly.

“You know I’ve always tried to protect you.” He put a finger under your chin, tilting your head to meet his eye. “Don’t you trust me?”

A beat passed before you responded.

“I do,” you said through gritted teeth, pulling your face away from him.

“I’ll ask them to up your dosage.” Ransone took a step away from you, dropping his hand. “I’m going to need my best player on the field as soon as possible.”

You didn’t acknowledge his statement. Every part of your body felt like it was going to combust.

Did he really say that no one was going to be there or was it just the injuries playing with you?

“Get well soon,” he offered, one step out the door. “Buttercup.”

“You trust me, don’t you Y/N?” he repeated when you didn’t respond.

“Yes.” You swallowed, gaze falling to the floor.

“And I trust you. You wouldn’t do anything to break that, would you?”

Sam raised his one hand questioningly as if to ask what the hell he was talking about. An intimidation tactic. He had been using it for several years to reinforce your loyalty.

“I wouldn’t.”

There were things you weren’t telling him, of course. Details about that day or where you and Sam were hiding right off the top of your head. More if you thought about it deeply.

“Good,” came his response. “So if there’s anything you need, let me know. I’m always a call away.”

“Thank you.”

“Talk to you soon.” He ended the call there.

You stood there blankly for a while before dropping the phone to the ground and crushing it. Usually you wouldn’t have to do that; removing the battery would be enough. This time you wanted to.

Your chest rose and fell heavily. You loathed him. Yet, you couldn’t fucking leave. 

“Hey.” Your eyes snapped back to Sam. “We still going on that run?”

__

The wind felt good.

Your muscles were burning and you could feel the constriction of your lungs but you liked it. The endorphins were working their charm.

Sam was right beside you, not questioning why there was so much aggression in your movement. You had lost track of how long you had been running. You couldn’t bring yourself to focus on that.

The path was paved with fallen branches and roots sticking out, forcing you to hop over some of them to avoid falling. It only annoyed you further.

You wanted to punch something. Or someone. The tension was rolling off your back in waves, and if someone saw you the’d probably believe you were going to commit an act of violence.

It was a while before you felt your steps begin to falter, the need for a proper breath taking precedence over the want to run more.

“Timeout?” you asked Sam breathlessly, slowing your pace to a jog.

“Sure about that, Usain Bolt?” he huffed, slowing his pace to match yours.

“Sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he dismissed it. “T’was fun.”

Now that you had slowed down, it forced you to come to terms with how much energy you had just burnt out.

“You wanna talk about what’s on your mind or ignore it?”

“Rather not talk about it for now.” The more you thought about him, the angrier you got. And as of late, you had realised that your method of dealing with that anger wasn’t the best.

The air was getting colder. It was getting harder to see what was in front of you, relying on the few rays of sunlight that shone through the treetops. You took a roundabout at your self declared checkpoint, changing course back to the house.

Sam followed wordlessly, but his presence was strangely comforting. Warm.

“Thank you.”

“For...” he trailed off, prodding you on.

“I don’t know. This.” You gestured to the path ahead of you. “I didn’t think you’d agree to it.”

“Why wouldn’t I?” His eyebrows knit together in puzzlement.

You didn’t have an answer to that. Probably because you weren’t used to people just doing nice things for no apparent reason.

“How are you so calm all the time? I’ve never seen him get under your skin,” you asked quietly. “How do you do it?”

He didn’t answer straight away. He mulled over it as he dodged broken sticks and upended roots on the ground. You would be fine if he didn’t answer either; as long as he knew that you appreciated it.

“I just realised that everything he put into me was destructive. Actively worked on unlearning it,” he replied after a while. “It took me years to even begin.”

You expected to hear that but it didn’t make it easier.

“I don’t even know how to start,” you mumbled. It was so tiring, even thinking of where and how it began. It was all you knew. All you were taught.

“If I could add something?”

You looked at him questioningly.

“You had a different relationship with him than all of us, Y/N. A deeper one. It’s not easy to forget that,” he pointed out. “But… you’re not him. That takes strength.”

These weren’t new revelations. It was things you had told yourself earlier to rationalise all your actions. You knew it on a surface level but it was difficult to convince yourself sincerely.

You didn’t say anything, just continued jogging with an eye on the ground. 

It felt better to hear it from someone else. A starting point to maybe get to where he was, too.

“I just can’t believe anyone took him seriously enough for him to get this far,” Sam added, a tick of annoyance in his voice. “I don’t condone bullying but someone should have just punched him in the face as a child.”

It wasn’t even the funniest thing you had heard him say but for some reason it elicited a snort from you, soon giving way to a laugh.

His face snapped to yours at the sound of your laughter, a small smile growing on his face.

His brief moment of distraction was all it took for him to not notice the tree root sticking out in front of him. His ankle got caught in the wood, sending him stumbling to the ground face forward.

“Oh shit,” you cursed, halting in your place immediately, dropping to your knees to where he was.

“Fuckin’ hell,” he groaned, turning onto his back. “I think I broke my face.”

“That may be a bit excessive but your nose is definitely bleeding,” you knew this was serious but you were finding it difficult to control your laughter once you realised it wasn’t a life threatening injury.

“Just leave me here to die.” He covered his eyes with his elbow, refusing to look at you.

“C’mon, Wilson. Let’s get you fixed up.” You stood up, offering your hand. He grabbed onto it, hoisting himself up.  “Can you stand up straight? Do you think you have a concussion?”

“World class assassin,” he grumbled, shaking his head to imply he was fine other than a possible broken nose.

“Promise I won’t tell. Your reputation is safe,” you said it humorously but with conviction, hoping to make it less embarrassing for him. Not that you’d let him forget it any time soon.

It took longer to walk back considering how far you had ventured out, along with the fact that you had to guide him as he held his nose in the air to try and control the bleeding.

You pushed open the door to the house, holding it open as he walked in. Sam made his way to the dining room after you told him you’d get the first aid kit for the second time during your stay there.

By the time you returned from the bathroom, grabbing an old t-shirt along the way, he had a single ice cube pressed to the bridge of his nose.

“That’s not going to be enough.” You dropped the kit onto the table, opening the mini fridge. You emptied the ice cubes from the tray onto the t-shirt, twisting it into a small ice pack.

“These are my battle scars.” You could tell that he was trying not to use his nose. He sounded ridiculous. 

“Whatever makes you feel better, Sam,” you chortled. His mouth eased into a half smile and you didn’t get why until you realised it was the first time you had called him by his name. You didn’t acknowledge it, surprised by how easily it slipped out from your mouth when you weren’t actively stopping it.

You gave him a bit of cotton to wipe off the blood that had dried on his face.

“Look up,” you instructed, standing over him so you could assess the damage. He complied, letting you cradle his jaw softly, tilting his head to see if there were any signs of a fracture or anything worse.

It was a bad fall, but nothing he hadn’t been through before in terms of severeness. It wasn’t going to leave a mark.

“Definitely going to bruise but it’s not broken,” you concluded, going over it once more to make sure.

“Thanks, doc,” his voice came softly from below you. Only then did you realise how close you were standing to him. You could feel his breath on your wrist that was still caressing his face.

It felt like eternity, but he didn’t make an effort to move or shove you away. Your eyes flitted down to his lips for a second. If you just leaned dow-

“Right,” you cleared your throat, taking a step back. “Just hold this to your face for a while to reduce any swelling.”

You handed him the makeshift ice pack, feeling the heat creep up your neck.

“Your turn to use the bed tonight, right?” His voice was significantly lower than what it had been a few minutes ago, something you weren’t acclimated to hearing. It only made your face feel hotter.

“Yeah.” You avoided meeting his eyes, using the time to close the first aid kid. “Unless you want it.”

“No, go ahead.”

It was too early to retire for the evening but suddenly you weren’t all that hungry anymore. Apparently neither was he.

“See you tomorrow, then?” you inquired, turning away before he could see you cringe.

“See you tomorrow,” he confirmed, “Good night.”

You just gave him a short wave over your shoulder and physically restrained from walking to the room, shutting the door and never looking at him again. You hoped he didn’t notice or at least never bring it up if he did.

You couldn’t do this. Not again.

Not when you knew the consequences.

Next part

[itsnothingofinterest]

So you know what’s been on my mind lately? How much of a humanitarian nightmare Tartarus is, and the dark implications about how it’s used.

What we know for sure about Tartarus is pretty stark, but we can draw some easy assumptions from that little information. All we know for sure is thus: 

It was made for the worst of the worst criminals for whom the death penalty is considered too lenient. While inside, prisoners are strapped to slabs of metal or chairs so they can talk to interrogators but otherwise not move, and guns are trained on them at all times to fill them with lead if they even think about using their quirks. In at least AFO’s case, he was taken there without trial; but he does seem to be having a trial later on...which they don’t feel he needs to be there for it. Also, prisoners aren’t told any outside information.

The implications we can draw are as such: If it’s purposefully worse than the death sentence, it is likely a life sentence with no parole. Additionally, I imagine it purposefully has no interest in treating its prisoners humanely except in ways necessary to keep them alive. Regarding those trials, because they aren’t told anything on the outside, we can possibly assume that they are not removed to talk to defendants or taken to court. So AFO’s legal situation may be the norm. We don’t have evidence to suggest he’s being treated special anyway, considering the purpose of Tartarus.

But hey, that’s fine right? This is the prison for the worst of the worst, why care if it’s not exactly humane, or if these guys don’t take part in their own trials? Well you should probably care on principle anyway, but also that only holds true if we assume the people in charge who send them to Tartarus are all on the ball with no hidden agendas or biases. And if you’ve kept your ear on the current real life situation with the police & government, you may realize how unrealistic that is.

You see, there’s something I’ve noticed about Tartarus; everyone involved in the League who’s been captured has been sent there. The only one who we don’t know has been sent there is Mustard, and we don’t know he hasn’t been sent there either. (Also, I heard that in side material it’s stated that child villains can be tried as adults, but I haven't varied that. It sounds plausible if I’m honest, but take it with a grain of salt.) Now, that kind of makes sense on an individual basis when you remember the people caught are Muscular, Moonfish, & technically Stain; 3 mass murderers & hero killers, and All For One; the criminal king pin of the last 200 years. Except then there’s Kurogiri.

Kurogiri, while a main member of the League of Villains, doesn’t have much of a criminal record. He’s threatened the hero students & injured Thirteen, but otherwise he’s just been a taxi service, bartender, and baby sitter for the League. If threatening and injuring heroes is enough to land you in the biggest prison in the country, either japan’s criminals must be really pathetic or Tartarus is full to bursting. (And yes, he’s also a Nomu, but they didn't know that at the time and I can’t imagine how that would relate to the prison your sent to anyway.)

Or, more likely I feel, there’s a standing order to send every captured League member to Tartarus. Now why would they do that you ask? Well I have some theories that all hold about the same amount of water. Perhaps it’s because All For one is that notorious that anyone with any connection to anyone he knows has to be sent there for the people in charge to feel really safe that he’s finally gone.

Or perhaps it’s because the League itself is considered a threat. Shigaraki is someone who, in his first day of villainy; picked a fight with All Might, almost won, and then got away. I imagine all of those factors are quire rare, so he was already a blemish on hero society from day 1. He’s also basically the only force in the country actively calling out the corrupt Hero Society. Stain was calling out corruption in the heroes, but he through the system itself was fine, while Shigaraki is against the system itself and is actively gathering like-minded people to bring it down. I don’t know how aware of Shigaraki’s views the HC are, but if they are then they have even more reason to show no mercy to anyone in his group.

Or it could just be because the group as a whole are considered by the public as super-dangerous domestic-terrorists. I mean even if it is one of the above reason, that’s probably the cover story.

Still, and maybe it’s just because the League are all my faves, I can’t help but find it disturbing that they’d be shipped of to that worst of the worst prison for the worst of the worst criminals for life upon capture, potentially before any kind of trial and without ever taking part in any kind of trial. Even Spinner might be sent there and I don’t think he’s even killed anyone who’s not one of those CRC Klan-looking freaks. And there’s a not insignificant chance Mustard was sent there. That’s weird, right? That’s more than a bit messed up, right?

And I mean, if they’ve done this with the League, who’s to say they haven't done this with other groups or individuals the HC finds particularly troublesome?

[tailoredshirt]

Things I wish the 911 Lone Star writers understood about Texas (and maybe some stuff fic writers will find helpful if they don't live here)

- Not every bar in Texas is a honkytonk bar, although they certainly exist. Most bars will look like any other bar in the US

- I don't know any Texan who would believes a newbie should "earn their spurs" (omg) by line dancing. I couldn't line dance if you put a gun to my head and I've lived here my whole life. Kudos to those who can

- The Austin housing market is ridiculous, and every time I see Carlos's house I become indignant about how a 20-something young cop could afford such a nice place on his salary. No, I will never let it go.

- Austin is a college town! It is notoriously the most liberal, artsy fartsy city in Texas, and I'm irritated that the show doesn't acknowledge it at all (except for maybe Marjan's comment about SXSW). "Keep Austin Weird" is a popular bumper sticker (as TK quoted in 1x05)

- Other popular bumper stickers: "Don't Mess With Texas" "I wasn't born in Texas but I got here as fast as I could!"

- Texas school kids take Texas history classes in middle school. We celebrate Texas Independence Day and other relevant dates.

- I know someone who is literally on an FBI watch list for being part of a group who petitions and works towards Texas becoming its own country again. They exist. Some people are very proud of Texas's history as its own country.

- Most native Texans have experienced snow!!! Not the way it happens up north, with everything covered in 5 feet and snow plows and shit, but we do get snow here. It's enough of a novelty that it's a biggish deal when it happens. My city will shut down if the snow or ice is relatively bad because Texas just doesn't have the infrastructure to handle it, which is one reason the February freeze was so bad

- Texans will pride themselves on "well, Northerners couldn't handle our summers" but we will also complain about the fucking heat every time we get in our cars and the dashboard reads 120F. Idk how TK walks around outside in hoodies all the time unless it's winter, I would roast

- No, Austin is not a small town, but I'm not even sure Carlos meant that literally? It's small compared to NYC for sure. I don't live there, maybe Austin locals can interpret that better.

- Brands that have cult status in Texas: Blue Bell ice cream, Whataburger, H-E-B (grocery chain)

- Idk, there's probably more. Feel free to correct me or add things. This is based on my own limited experience of course.