#nothing broken nothing bruised

[hellishnonsense]

just exploded a sausage

[bruciemilf]

I want an AU where Jor-El survived with Clark and they both crash on earth together.

The image of Pa Kent worrying this smoking hot extraterrestrial DILF is gonna steal his wife is so funny to me. His baby IS adorable, thought, so he can stay.

Jor-El is actually courting BOTH him and Martha.

Is this an elaborate scheme so I can get Bruce being cornered by a big ass Kryptonian father who’s adamant he completes their courting rituals?

Perhaps.

Jor-El is tall like a mountain and calm like a river, pinning Bruce down with a hard stare as he explains the process in their own language. Which Bruce WILL study and learn if he wants a shot.

Clark sighs, “He says the suitor can pick any activity they please as long as the rules are fair. If they fail to win, the parent can,— dad, I’m not translating that.”

He doesn’t need to. Bruce learned Kryptonian since the first day they met. Jor-El’s torture methods are definetly creative. “Hn.”

He knows what he has to do.

—

“…Did you just win Clark in a game of poker?”

Bruce shrugs, hoarding the winning tokens while Jor-El rages. “I also won an apple pie.”

Ma Kent is cackling.

[serickswrites]

I'm Just Not Well

Warnings: rescue, captivity, torture, broken bones, blood, bruises, hurt/aftermath, hurt/recovery, hospital

"Whumpee, you gotta talk to me, please," Caretaker said as they sat in the back of the ambulance with Whumpee.

Whumpee's skin was mottled with bruises in various stages of healing--some deep purple almost black, some red and swollen, while others had taken an almost blue green tint as they healed. Their collar bone was clearly broken. Blood had dried in their matted hair, clotted on their split eyebrow, and had dried on other parts of their body that was visible.

They sat quietly on the gurney, responding only to a few questions asked by the EMT. Their voice was low and hoarse. Clearly they had been screaming from days. They stared out with a hollow look in their one not swollen shut eye.

"Whumpee?" Caretaker tried again.

"I'm alive," they croaked, "I'm just not well."

Caretaker's heart sunk. They had hoped Whumpee would open up a little bit more to them. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Whumpee closed their one good eye and leaned back on the gurney. "There's nothing else to tell you, Caretaker. I'm alive."

Caretaker opened their mouth and closed it. Clearly Whumpee wasn't ready to talk about whatever horrors they had endured at Whumper's hands. "Well, I'm here if you ever want or need to talk, Whumpee."

Whumpee nodded, but didn't say anything. They kept their eye closed, their body swaying with the motion of the ambulance speeding down the city streets.

"We'll be at the hospital soon, Whumpee. You're going to be ok," Caretaker said, hoping that their words were true and Whumpee would be ok.

Tags: @mousepaw @jumpywhumpywriter @knightinbatteredarmor @hufflepuffwritingstuff2 @anightmarishwhump

@steh-lar-uh-nuhs @celestialsoyeon @st0rmm @ay5ksal @pedro-pedro-pedro-pedro-pe

@artisticdemon

[stayatsam]

image that flashed in my head as i fell down a fucking flight of stairs today

[waspgrave]

going to play d&d and decide in a very adult manner 'put the dishes away' but then i get taken out by the dishwasher and looked like the death pose in family guy as the roomba bonked repeatedly into my bruised ass.

[natti-ice]

got my fingers slammed in a foldable trampoline🤗

[sweetest-honeybee]

I shut my fingers in the door hinge at work today :D 👉🏻👉🏻

[bloodbathfortwo]

Alex to Nigel or vice versa, whatever floats your boat. Despite their bad reputation, they'll always find ways to entice the other. Just like a game of cat and mouse. Thrilling and exciting.

[vivaciouscynner]

Highlander Halloween Curse Prompt

Okay, so like highlander, but instead of chopping off the head to take their powers, you break an artist's hand to absorb their style.

I recently had my hand smashed by a fridge and thus had the idea.

[unofficialadamtaurus]

Turns out attempting to catch a puck shot at you when you aren’t playing as a goalie is not good for the structural integrity of your fingers

[a-totally-reasonable-username]

Sensory issues and chronic pain = not knowing if you have a really low or really high pain tolerance because it could be either one

[leatherforhell]

life update: I fell in a sinkhole today

this sounds like a joke but it’s not, I literally fell in a sinkhole on my way into work

[heyclickadee]

You know, in retrospect, chicken chile with jalapeños and another soup that has green salsa in the ingredients were probably not the best things to make and eat right after getting a crown implant. (Maybe failed my wisdom saving throw on that one. Actually, are wisdom saving throws a thing in D&D? I’ve only ever actually played once.)

[stayatsam]

fell halfway down the tall escalator at the train station and now my left leg looks like someone started beating it with hammers

[waywardsalt]

mmmhhhhhmmmgggghhhhhhhhhbellumbeck

[saturatedsinset]

I lived in this house for seven years and didn't fall down the stairs once. but now, here for a week and a half, two days before we leave, I fall down the fucking stairs