#nothing bad is going to happen if you don't write
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Hon, and I say this with all the love in my heart; you read the fucking summary.
It tells you what it's about. Then you check the tags. The tags will drop key hints about what happens (ships, potential triggers or hard "no"s, special AU's that you may be looking for or wanting to avoid, etc.)
And if all of it sounds interesting you read it! That's it! And if you get in and don't like it you use the back button! That's it!
Also hits:kudos ratio is a terrible way to "guage" if the actual story is any good. Anytime someone reloads the page or misclicks or comes back to reread/read new chapters it counts as a hit. Like that's just the raw number of how many times it's been opened and nothing else. It doesn't denote "good" or "bad". At best you could take it to mean they write good descriptions so a lot of people have clicked on the story. So it doesn't actually say anything about the story itself.
If a story is new then this kind of rule kills you ever giving it a chance. Check the description. There are more than a few gems I've read over the years that have had pretty low kudos and hits - either because they were new or because they weren't what other people were wanting to read. That didn't make them bad. It just made them niche.
I'd advise knowing what you're in the mood for and searching for that instead as well; if you want a coffee shop AU and try reading anything but that it doesn't matter how decent the ratio is. Or even how good the story actually is; you're probably not going to like it by virtue of it not being what you want to read.
Another AO3 thing I’m curious about, how do yall decide if something is good enough to read? Usually I follow a rule of 1 kudos for every 10 hits. One because it’s easy math and two it’s yet to fail me. Thoughts? Do you just go for it and pray it’s good?
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could you pretend to be in love? (10/10)
The Realization
pairing: modern!aemond × fem!reader (fake dating)
summary: prom is coming and so is the end of a stage in your life. surprises and unexpected conversations take place, the question is, are you able to forgive in order to move on?
word count: 9.7k
previous part • series masterlist
this is not a drill, it's really happening!
first of all, i want to apologize for having left this story aside without finishing it. it wasn't something i decided, the writer's block precisely in this fic made me not try anymore for a while, mostly to clear my mind and my ideas, because i had no idea what to write after chapter nine 💀
so I hope you really forgive me and enjoy the last chapter 🥺 it has been an honor to have given you this little fic, I really enjoyed writing it despite the little mental breakdowns I had haha
and just like my other stories, I keep it in my heart and it will always be here for whenever you want to reread (I will make sure to post it in AO3, don't worry) i'm also thinking of doing a poll about the epilogue where you guys will decide if you want one or prefer this ending. let me know after you finish reading the chapter 🤗
enjoy and I look forward to your comments!
It still all feels like a bad dream that you can't wake up from. An unwanted dream. A nightmare.
And every time a new day comes, you feel like a human being who does everything in automatic mode, not because you really want to.
In front of your dad you must pretend that everything is fine, but as soon as you leave home and get to school, you feel a huge weight and a sadness that nothing and no one can take away from you.
You feel the stares of some people on you, if not all of them. But the truth is that you feel so emotionally drained that you don't even pay attention to them.
Many would say that not being accepted to a college doesn't mean it's the end of the world. Nor does it mean that your chances are over because there is still too much time to be able to do everything you want.
And you accept that they are right. All is not lost because you didn't get accepted.
When you were rejected the first time when you applied in conjunction with the scholarship, disillusionment sets in. There is disappointment in yourself for not being enough and there is this question that constantly floats in your mind; why others do and I don't? Why am I not worthy of the same fate as them?
Maybe it's age, but it's inevitable to feel that rejection and failure after having so many plans and having in mind the idea of making your dad proud by telling him that you've been accepted to college.
And not just any college, but Citadel.
But so far, you haven't had the courage to tell him instead that you won't go to any college. You just can't. You don't know what exactly you'll tell him and you don't want to face it yet. You don't want to see his disappointed face so you need more time.
So instead of dreams and aspirations, as well as preparing to live a college life, you prepare and focus on getting a job. You don't see employment as a bad thing either. You just wish you didn't have to focus on it right now.
You haven't talked to Aemond either. You haven't even seen him.
You're in some classes together. But you barely pay attention. Even though you used to notice his presence before and now, unconsciously, you ignore it. Now your mind is too busy with your worries.
It's like being in a disconnect. You are just there, existing. But you barely talk, barely react and barely do. You just want classes to end soon so you can go home.
Of course, he hasn't stopped trying.
He wants to talk to you, but you won't let him. You just don't want to have anything to do with him anymore. Even though you feel that emptiness he has left, you immediately force yourself not to think about it.
It's like pain and confusion mixed together, but your pride and that same pain makes you prefer to stay away.
You don't even care anymore what people say about him and you. It's obvious that the two of you are no longer in a 'relationship'. No one knows what happened and neither one of you is clarifying anything.
Which you are grateful for, so as not to feed the topic in the whole school.
Meanwhile, Alysanne and Cregan are almost always around you, trying to cheer you up and make you endure school better. You couldn't be more grateful for both of them either.
"So what are your plans for the weekend?"
Alysanne asks as the three of you are sitting on a bench in the outside courtyard. On the bench where you and Aemond made the fake relationship contract, precisely. But you try not to focus on that as the three of you eat lunch.
"We're going to the movies, did you forget already?" asks Cregan, confused.
"Huh? This weekend?"
"You forgot," he assures her.
"I didn't forget!" she lies, nervous.
"We agreed to go on Saturday. To the ten o'clock function for the horror movie."
Oh yes, the two of them are dating. Just as you and Aemond have 'broken up', so you try not to feel more distressed about it.
"Do you want to come, Y/N?"
You raise your gaze to Alysanne, confused, who gives you a smile.
"It's a date, isn't it? Just the two of you."
"We'll have more dates," she makes a nonchalant gesture.
Poor Cregan.
"Besides, it would do you good to clear your head a bit. So, what better than going to the movies? Right, Cregan?"
"Yeah, it'll do you good," he nods.
"No, thank you," you say softly, "I don't want to interfere with your dates. Besides, I'm not in the mood to go out. I'd rather stay home."
"You're not going to interfere with anything. Besides, you've stayed home enough days," she reproaches you, "Come on. Even one night. We'll have a great time."
"If you don't want to go to the movies, we can go somewhere else," Cregan proposes.
You grimace slightly.
"No, thank you. I..." you sigh, "I really appreciate it, guys. But I'd rather stay home."
Staying home to look for a proper job and plan to tell your dad you won't be going to college, like you've been doing for the past few days.
"Are you sure?" Alysanne looks at you not entirely convinced.
"Yeah," you shrug, "Don't worry about me."
"Of course I worry about you."
"You should focus on your date," you say as you give Cregan a meaningful look.
"Totally," Cregan nods, "In fact, she'll plan the next date."
"What?" she looks at him in horror.
"What you heard."
"And why me?"
"Because I always do."
Your talk with them doesn't last long as soon the bell rings and they head off to their respective classes, except for you, who has a free hour.
So you stand on the bench alone, just looking outside and nothing else, enjoying your lunch unhurriedly and in peace and quiet.
You let out a long breath and distract yourself for a few moments in your social networks, watching as some people post their reactions from when they were accepted to colleges. Everyone screams, smiles and cries of happiness with their families.
Except for others who quietly show how they were not accepted. But they open more emails and get accepted to other colleges.
You wish you were part of them.
You close those apps and go to Tiktok to distract yourself for a while by watching funny videos or storytimes.
When suddenly, you hear footsteps approaching behind you, which catches your attention. You turn your head, peeking over your shoulder and then you see him, Aemond.
He stops as soon as your eyes look directly into his, as if you've caught him in the act of robbery. Which reveals how very cautious he was being to approach and not scare you.
You see the uncertainty in his gaze, the insecurity and the wariness all at the same time. Which is rare for him, as he doesn't allow himself to look so vulnerable. But you understand why he's this way with you.
First you think about getting up and leaving him with the word in his mouth, like you've been doing lately. But for some reason, it's like finally your mind resigns and your body will force you to stay where you're sitting. And you don't even know why.
Or maybe it's because he's begging you with his gaze not to leave and listen to what he has to say after so many weeks.
Inevitably your nerves invade you and neither he nor you say anything for a few long seconds. He just stands still, as if testing the waters, waiting to see if you will move away from him again attentively.
Then he swallows hard and watches you with a sad but hopeful expression.
“Can I come closer?”
You press your lips together, think about it for a few seconds and finally give him a barely visible nod.
You turn your gaze to the front and begin to put your tupper with food in your backpack. While at the same time Aemond approaches you, cautious but firm. And surprised that you are allowing him to do this.
You let out a long breath and bring a hand to your hair, nervous, not knowing why.
Then he steps in front of you and only at that moment, you realize he has a folder in his hand. A folder that he sets down on the table in front of you, with smooth, cautious movements.
“I just came to drop this off for you. Nothing else.”
You raise your gaze to look at it confused for a moment, then look back down at the folder in front of you.
“It's the paperwork you need to submit to finalize the scholarship process,” he says softly, “Classes start in two months and by now you should have received an email from the university with all the information as an incoming student.”
Wait, what?
Your mind immediately questions, as you frown more and feel your heart start to beat too fast.
“What are you talking about?” you ask in a low murmur, not understanding.
And Aemond lets out a long breath.
“I'm keeping my promise.”
His words echo steadily in your mind.
And you dare to raise your gaze to him again, confused, serious and incredulous. And what he does is lower his gaze, sorrowful and unsure. However… he is firm with what he is saying.
Then a tingle begins to run through your hands, at the same time as you feel the nervousness sweep through your body like a wave. You part your lips as you look at the folder in front of you and with trembling hands, you pick it up and open it.
The first thing you see is the university logo and an overwhelming sensation sweeps over your body and mind as you see what appears to be a letter addressed to you.
Miss. Y/N Y/L/N, Faculty of Law. Official documentation for the scholarship process.
You feel the air you were holding in your lungs slowly leave your mouth. And a huge weight that you felt in your chest is lifted, allowing you to rest and breathe properly.
At first, you think your mind is playing a joke on you. You think he's doing it. But… this is real. More real than you can imagine.
“I know I didn't do things the right way…
Aemond begins to speak, noticing the mix of shock and confusion in your gaze, breathing hard through your mouth.
“I know I took you for granted and that I hurt you,” he says softly, “But that was never my intention, Y/N. I-I… I thought I would get everything under control. That I would work it out and get everything done on time. But, it's just… I don't even have justification.”
You feel tears begin to form in your eyes. But you control yourself. You bite the inside of your cheek and try not to let his words make you break down in tears.
As if the fact that you have in front of you one of the papers confirming and assuring you that you will finally go to the college of your dreams isn't enough.
“I should have acted sooner and looked for solutions. I should have been honest with you from the beginning. And you don't know how sorry I am,” he says softly and vulnerably, his gaze lowered, ”I also don't expect you to forgive me for keeping a promise and asking for forgiveness. I know I fucked up and things can never go back to the way they were. But I just want you to know…” he takes a moment, "That I really did fall in love with you."
Fuck.
“What I felt for you was real. It was never a game or a pretense. I was just… afraid,” he admits, ”Afraid of fucking up what we had. Afraid it would all fall apart if I told you the truth. But… I ruined everything,” he says with a resigned tone, ”You don't have to talk to me again either if you don't want to. You don't owe me anything. I just wanted to tell you the truth and let you know how sorry I am.”
Each word echoes in your mind, with the weight of his regret and his sincerity. You feel the tremble in your body, not helping the fact that you are still staring at the college sheet addressed to your name.
And you hold back, trying to calm the chaos being unleashed inside you by his words.
When he doesn't say anything else, you certainly won't and you both fall silent for a moment, as the weight of his words and the meaning of them fill the space. Until he speaks again.
“I won't bother you anymore,” he moves forward a bit back to the way he came, “Best of luck at Citadel. You deserve it, you really do,” he tells you with a small smile that is sad but genuine at the same time.
Then his figure disappears from your field of vision and you hear him start to walk away. And at that moment, the world seems to stop for you.
Unable to help yourself, you turn your head and watch him walk away with tears in your eyes. There is something in his walk, in that slight slope of his shoulders, that screams the burden he carries. And you don't know why, but… you want to call him, to tell him something that will ease the knot you both feel.
However, you know that won't fix anything.
You feel the air leave you, his words still echoing in your mind. You stare at the folder again, trying to remember what this achievement meant to you before this moment, before he came and stirred all the emotions in you.
You try to be strong, you try not to let this affect you more than it should, you think of the positive. But you can't.
So still in disbelief, excitement, sadness and with all your emotions mixed up, you take your phone, unlock it and open your emails app. And there, your most recent email, you read: Citadel University.
With your hands shaking, you press the email and read in slightly larger letters: Welcome to Citadel University! Miss Y/N, Y/L/N. Faculty of Law, Registration number: 31982.
Then, finally, you can't hold back the tears any longer and you put a hand to your mouth, letting them out, with confused and intense feelings coming over you.
Your father's loving and proud words, hugs and kisses make you smile.
It took you four days to finally break the news to him. And seeing him so happy, excited and proud, made you finally stop feeling so bad for even a moment. You also broke the news to Alysanne and Cregan, who were very happy for you.
Neither of them mentioned Aemond, which you appreciated. But there is the clear acknowledgement to him for making this possible.
You obviously left the job search behind and instead started contacting the university. You sent the missing and necessary documents, they sent you information about the scholarship, your schedule, classes and also about your dorm.
It's like finally this void in your chest is being filled as you finally see this all happening. And as you look at the pictures of the university, with old, elegant and modern architecture at the same time, that excitement rises in you.
However, what you feel is not happiness in its entirety.
In fact, you feel in the middle of a crossroads; joy is mixed with sadness. And the satisfaction of fulfilling the dream feels incomplete.
The worst part is that you know why.
But you don't think about it too much either. You don't want to. On the contrary, you force yourself to repeat over and over again that this was the plan all along. You force yourself to enjoy it and get excited.
You force yourself to think that what happened outside of getting into the college of your dreams was for a reason, but in the end you got what you really wanted.
But, deep down inside, you think about how you wish things could have been different.
At the same time, prom is just around the corner.
At first, you thought about not attending, but of course, Alysanne wouldn't let you think about it anymore. She dragged you with her to the dress store and sentenced that it will be a date of three, her, Cregan and you.
You tried to persuade her, to make her understand that Cregan only wants her as his date. But, of course, Cregan as the great friend he also is, told you it would be fun.
Certainly neither he nor you nor Alysanne have ever been on a three-way date and he told you; what better than to try it at the prom?
The prom preparations are done. Now the important thing is to turn in final projects and get rid of all the pending with the professors.
And that's what you're doing now.
With your headphones on and a notebook along with a book on your table, you're about to finish a long, boring project. When you notice how a figure suddenly obscures your workspace and you raise your gaze almost instantly, curious.
Helaena.
You remove your headphones, surprised to see her as she smiles softly at you.
“Hi,” you say to her in a soft tone, putting your project aside for a moment.
“Hi,” she says to you in the same soft tone, ”I… am I interrupting you?”
“Oh no,” you say nonchalantly, “I mean, yes, but I'm just about to finish it anyway. Don't worry.”
She looks at you a little unsure.
“Are you sure? It's just… I don't know,“ she shrugs, 'It's been a while since we last talked and I didn't know if I could come up to you.”
Again you ignore the small sharp pain in your chest at the memory of Aemond and try to look like you're not at all affected by having his sister in front of you.
“Yeah, well…” you try to smile a little, ”Things have been… intense lately.”
She nods as she takes a seat across from you.
“So it's official?” she asks you with a sad tone as she watches you with a sad little smile, “Like, I mean… you and my brother aren't coming back together?”
This time, the sharp pain in your chest is stronger and more persistent. As well as her question hits you like a wave.
How can you tell her that, in reality, everything you and Aemond had was false? That it was all part of an agreement?
The guilt begins to consume you as you see her face full of expectations and the worst thing is that it's not something you should tell her. That should be Aemond. But, still, you feel the urge to cry and you feel the need to finally tell her the truth, for the sake of everyone who made you believe the fake relationship.
“Helaena…” you begin, your voice barely a whisper, ”I-I… need to be honest with you.”
You take a breath, expecting the worst and imagining a series of difficult emotions to deal with.
“This whole thing between Aemond and I… it was fake,” you speak fearfully and sorrowfully, ”We were just… pretending for our own convenience. It wasn't…” you sigh, closing your eyes for a moment heavily, ”It wasn't real.”
You expected surprise, indignation, incredulity, anger, and more, all at the same time. But to your greatest surprise and bewilderment, she doesn't seem remotely surprised. Instead, she just smiles softly at you, full of understanding, as if she's been waiting for this moment for a long time.
“I already knew that,” she tells you in a serene tone that disarms you.
You feel your lungs hold all your air and you watch her completely stunned, surprised and confused with your parted lips. Then you blink, processing her words.
“What?”
“Aemond told me everything the moment you set up your rules,” she replies calmly, “The truth is, he never hides anything from me. He can't. So I already knew what you both were doing from the beginning.”
You continue to watch her in shock and disbelief, unable to believe it, trying to understand how she could have kept this to herself so naturally.
And in that moment, with disbelief and surprise beating in your chest, you realize that in every single conversation you had with her, right here at school, at parties, even at that family dinner that ended in disaster thanks to Aegon's drunkenness… she had always known.
“Though I don't always approve of his decisions, I understood why he did it… and why you did too.”
But your mind is still short-circuiting, processing and comprehending.
You relive in your mind every moment you went out of your way to pretend, believing you were fooling everyone, especially her. And yet, there's Helaena, looking at you with an expression of calm and empathy that completely disarms you.
“So you knew?” you are able to formulate in asking in a breathy whisper.
She nods, smiling softly.
“Easy, only I knew.“
“And you're not upset?” you ask confused, still waiting for some sign of reproach.
“Not at all. On the contrary, I'm relieved,” she tells you honestly, ”People made fun of Aemond after Alys. And, well, that left a mark on him. You know what rumors are like here.”
“Oh, believe me I do.”
“And they made him miserable. It also didn't help at all that Alys was his first girlfriend and his first formal relationship but the two of them didn't love each other, it was just obsession and whim,” she says absurdly, "And with you, at least, he got some peace back, even if it was temporary."
“But then…” you look at her blankly, “Why did you ask me if we'll get back together?”
Helaena sighs, her gaze soft but intense.
“Because in the end the two of you really fell in love. I saw you at Dragonstone and it was… too obvious.”
You remain silent, remembering those moments.
Both of you walking through those historical corridors, seeing and learning absolutely everything about old Valyria. Both holding hands, fascinated in the aquarium watching everything around or walking together on the shore of the beach, laughing, exchanging glances, hugging and kissing every now and then that everything felt too sincere to be pretending.
You relived every moment and every detail that you wished you could go back to when everything was fine.
Aemond had been different with you those days, a side of him that you had never seen and had thought only existed because of his performance in the fake relationship you had both agreed to.
But even you, being there, without the pressure to pretend, you felt the barriers fall between the two of you, because it was all real.
“He fell in love with you, Y/N,” Helaena tells you sincerely, “You… you did too?”
You feel a lump form in your throat and you let the question float in the air for a moment. The answer is so clear in your mind that it hurts; and yet, saying it out loud feels like breaking a promise you had made to protect yourself.
“Yes, I did too,” you admit, sadness settling in your chest, "But…" you take a deep breath, watching her, ”What happened with Floris even though it was a mistake… and then, the fact that he didn't tell me the truth about Citadel, it really hurt me.”
Helaena nods softly, not judging you, simply listening to you. And when she speaks, her tone is so serene and understanding that it comforts you.
“My brother has this amazing ability to do things in the worst possible way,” she says with a small resigned smile, ”Floris was a mistake. He was drunk and well, he told me that before that both of you have had a disagreement, although that doesn't justify it, I know. I'm just saying, it really was a mistake.”
Your mind momentarily flashes back to that moment, when you tried to end the fake relationship after the family dinner thing.
“And as for the Citadel thing…” she pauses, searching for the right words, “He freaked out, Y/N. He didn't know how to tell you without ruining everything. And I know that doesn't justify it either, but…” she sighs, ”He was going to do whatever it took to hold up his part of the contract. He just didn't count on our grandfather suddenly getting difficult. Our family is already so fucked up as it is, that was the last thing he expected.”
Her words suddenly make you feel interested and curious about a specific topic you hadn't remembered until now. But Helaena continues to speak and you listen to her.
“Even though his method was disastrous, in his mind, he was protecting you,” she says, ”Again, I'm not justifying it. But I know he was desperate to get you that place at Citadel no matter what because he knew you deserved it. And…” she smiles at you with a gesture of resignation, "I think he loves you enough to do stupidly risky things. Even go against grandfather and act behind his back knowing how much trouble he could get into.”
You bite the inside of your cheek and feel a knot of emotions form in your chest. Everything she's telling you opens a door to feelings you'd tried to repress, to thoughts you'd rather bury.
You take a deep breath, remembering again those days at Dragonstone.
You relive every moment, when words were redundant and the silence between the two of you felt so full of meaning. He was always watching you in a way that seemed to say everything and nothing at the same time. He was slowly revealing that vulnerable part of himself that he seemed to have lost after Alys.
But as much as you want to think straight, your thoughts are a whirlwind of conflicting emotions. On the one hand, the pain of it all consumes you but on the other, there's the certainty of how you feel about him.
Even when you're hurting, you know you can't ignore it.
“I know he's still waiting, deep down, for maybe…” Helaena pauses, “Maybe there's a chance for both of you.”
The expression on her face is so sincere and tender that you find it impossible not to believe her, and the thought fills you with a mixture of relief and pain. Because, despite everything, you still love him, and that truth is impossible to deny.
“I don't know,” you confess, biting your lips and feeling your eyes water, ”I-I…I don't know what to do. I mean, we're already graduating. We'll go to the same college but I doubt we'll see each other, you know? And I just… n-no… I don't know….
“Hey, hey,” Helaena tells you instantly, ”It's okay. We don't have to talk about this anymore. I didn't want to overwhelm you or burden you, I just wanted to tell you my opinion and for you to talk to someone in case you needed to,” she tells you softly, comfortingly, ”Still, it's something between the two of you and we can talk about anything else.”
You thank her with a relieved look, her gesture of empathy appearing as she watches you with her soft, understanding expression. And then, she speaks with a more casual tone, changing the subject with a lightness that relieves you a bit.
“You have everything ready for graduation? Are you bringing a date?”
“Hum… yes, I already have everything ready,” you nod, ”And no, I'll go with my two friends. I think you met them, Alysanne and Cregan.”
“Oh yes! I know them,” she says with a smile, ”And I'm going with a friend too. I don't really like the idea of everything being so formal, so going with a friend will make it all more fun.”
Both are silent for a few moments, and although the conversation has taken on a lighter tone, you feel there's still a question trapped in your chest. And at the memory of that day, an impulse prompts you to speak before you can stop yourself.
“Helaena,” you call her softly, "I… can I ask you something?" you ask almost in a whisper, lowering your gaze a little, hesitating.
She watches you curiously and nods without hesitation.
“Yeah, sure.”
“Hum…” you stir in your seat, “That night, at dinner, Aegon said something… about your dad not caring about you. What did he mean by that?”
She immediately looks like she wasn't expecting that question at all, which immediately makes you regret it, but then she softens her whole gaze, not looking at all uncomfortable or upset.
“Oh, well… our dad…” she begins to speak, choosing her words precisely, “Well, he was always very neglectful with us. He always left all the work to mom to take care of us, even when she had to work too so she wasn't totally dependent on him,” she explains, ”It was chaos for a long time. Aegon and I lost years of education because of his lack of commitment.”
“Really?” you look at her attentively and surprised.
“He missed the date to register us for kindergarten in our proper time. He always forgot our birthdays or some important date. But, of course, that never happened to him with our older stepsister, Rhaenyra.”
You remember Aemond mentioning her, though not much.
“And you don't talk to her?”
“Yes, of course,” she says with a small smile, “She was never at blame. In fact, by comparison, she always took us into account and never forgot our existence,” she explains, ”And well, eventually mom divorced him. And the only good thing dad did in the end was to mention us and give us parts of his inheritance in his will.”
Helaena's sincerity and calmness in sharing this about her life surprises you and, at the same time, makes you understand the complicated family history behind them. Now it's no wonder why Aegon was so angry to bring up the subject of parents.
Nor do you ignore the connection you begin to feel towards them, obviously because of your mother and her abandonment.
“It must have been very difficult, for everyone,” you murmur, ”I'm sorry to hear that.”
She nods, though her expression doesn't reflect bitterness, but something akin to mature acceptance.
“Yes, but that made us strong,” she says with a slight smile, "Aegon was the one who resented his absence the most, as you could see," she tells you knowingly, ”You know, being the eldest and all. But we're more… happy now, now that he's gone,” she confesses.
You let out a long breath, watching her with compassion.
“Thank you for telling me. I didn't mean to intrude, really.”
“No, it's fine, it really doesn't affect me,” she assures you softly, ”After that Aegon scene at dinner, it's valid you know. So don't worry.”
You both smile softly at each other, expressions warm and sincere, falling silent. When Helaena stands up, slinging her backpack over her shoulder.
“Well…” she says, letting out a slight sigh, adjusting her backpack, ”I should be going now. I also have projects to finish.”
“Sure,” you nod, ”Thanks for coming and talking to me.”
“Oh, there's nothing to thank you for. Anytime. I'll see you later, okay?”
“Okay.”
You both say goodbye and you watch her walk away in the direction of the main building, her silver hair shining in the sunlight, as you let out a long breath and put your headphones back in.
Prom.
You really don't understand what you're doing here. But it's all Alysanne's doing, like the makeup, hairstyle and dress.
You get out of Cregan's car with a beautiful lilac metallic dress on. Finding it wasn't hard at all, since it was like love at first sight, especially since it has a princess cut. And upon measuring it, Alysanne also decided that it was the one.
The hairstyle was also easy, after all, you didn't want anything too voluminous or too fancy. So a wavy style in your hair with a crown of silver flowers at the crown of your head was the perfect touch.
Alysanne on the other hand chose a beautiful wine colored dress that flatters her at every angle, deciding to gather her hair with two strands falling on either side of her face, making her look absolutely elegant and gorgeous.
And once all three of you are ready, Cregan dressed in an impeccable dark suit, offers you both his arms and you enter the grand ballroom of the luxurious hotel together.
The ballroom is illuminated by the typical disco balls hanging from the high ceiling, casting silver and white sparkles that create an almost magical atmosphere.
The decor is elegant and subtle, with centerpieces of fresh flowers and candles giving each table a touch of romantic charm.
You feel a mixture of nerves and excitement as you enter, as if it's all part of a dream. After all, it is your prom and tonight symbolizes a chapter you are about to close, your high school years.
The dance floor is in the center, surrounded by tables in a circle and already some of the guests have started to dance, getting lost in the rhythm of the soft music that fills the atmosphere thanks to the DJ.
Although not only disco balls light up the place, but also some colored lights to make the atmosphere more colorful.
If someone had told you in your freshman year everything that was going to happen in your final year, you would have laughed out loud and wouldn't have believed it at all, because your life was too boring.
But here you are, with still those events in mind, where at the end of the night, you will put them behind you.
You adjust your lilac dress, whose princess-cut skirt falls in soft layers to the floor. The fabric moves with you, as if it were an extension of your own footsteps, and the color shimmers delicately under the silver lights.
The three of you make your way to one of the tables to take a seat and you take a closer look around you as the decorations and you also see familiar faces of some of your classmates, some laughing in groups and others on the dance floor with their dates.
And Alysanne, excited and obsessed with everything, wants to have memories of the whole night and soon the three of you are taking a long selfie session with her phone.
Cregan complains about too many photos and the laughter of the three fills the air as Alysanne continues to make sure she captures the best shots, changing angles and poses.
Alysanne, with a huge smile, spins around on herself and then grabs your hands to dance with her, laughing every time you both take a step out of rhythm. You can feel her pure happiness, an excitement that doesn't take long to become contagious and where Cregan soon joins in.
The dance floor is filling up and the sparkles of the lights reflecting off everyone's costumes and dresses create an enchanting and magical atmosphere.
The DJ starts mixing more upbeat songs, and you see how everyone is having fun, laughing and dancing.
Immediately this catches Alysanne's attention and she drags the three of you onto the dance floor with infectious laughter. Before you know it, you're in the middle of the dance floor with them, surrounded by movement and music.
The music beats on the floor and vibrates in your chest, and, slowly, you begin to let loose, moving to the beat of the songs as the colored lights swirl above you all.
“I'm going to get a drink!” you let them both know over the music.
You have no idea exactly how much time passes that you find yourself dancing, enjoying the night, the echo of laughter and the warmth of the crowd.
The euphoria makes you forget and enjoy yourself as you feel your throat dry and your feet start to ache, with your body starting to beg for water and a little break.
“Okay!” Cregan nods, throwing you a smile, still dancing with Alysanne.
You smile knowingly, since after all, these two deserve to have their moment, and you walk away towards the table where there are different desserts and the drinks for all the graduates.
You take a bottle of water, and as you drink, the immediate relief makes you close your eyes for a moment, enjoying the coolness.
And only at that moment, standing alone and a little apart, you notice the glances of some people around you, mainly girls passing by you and whispering something between them, looking at you out of the corner of their eyes.
Great.
You thought you were past all this but even at prom it doesn't stop.
You take a deep breath and look out onto the dance floor, where you make out Alysanne and Cregan dancing close together, smiling and animated. You certainly don't want to interrupt them and you look around again, trying to distract yourself with anything you can find to rest your feet on.
You try not to make a big deal of it and look back at them for just a few moments with a serious look on your face and again try to focus on regaining your energy, telling yourself that this shouldn't affect you.
You remind yourself that you are here for you and your friends, and that is all that should matter to you.
When your gaze unconsciously focuses on Floris.
With her arm intertwined with a boy, whom you recognize from the lacrosse team, she looks absolutely elegant with a beautiful hairstyle and a gorgeous pink dress.
And as she joins the party, she seems totally focused on enjoying the evening, her expression relaxed and happy.
You look away from her, focused on something else, where your attention slips unintentionally to Alys, surrounded by her friends.
In the distance, suddenly her gaze meets yours and you quickly look away, not knowing why but… you really don't want to deal with or care about those people anymore.
She's wearing dark makeup and a sensual emerald green dress that completely clings to her body and highlights her curves. She looks completely beautiful, but knowing her attitude and behavior, it makes her lose her charm.
You watch Helaena for a few more seconds, her energy lighting up the dance floor, when suddenly, a tall, familiar figure catches your attention on the other side of the room in the crowd.
Instead, you focus on Helaena, who you find among all the people dancing, getting carried away by the atmosphere and in the company of the friend who told you.
Her silver hair is swaying to the music and she shines in the middle of everyone in that beautiful sky blue dress and gold accessories, looking absolutely gorgeous.
Aemond is standing a few feet away, talking to Aegon, both looking absolutely handsome for the evening. Then, the atmosphere around you seems to fade a bit and he's the only one who catches your eye in the middle of the crowd.
And that mixture of emotions about him rises in your chest again.
You take a closer look at who is around him and it is only Aegon. You don't see any girl hanging on his arm or anything, so apparently he has come unaccompanied, just like you.
He is dressed in a dark suit that highlights his slender figure and impeccable posture, just like Aegon. The silver light of the disc balls bring out his silver hair and his face so perfectly detailed, giving it a glow that is almost unreal to you.
Your gaze lingers on him longer than you had anticipated. From a distance, you can notice the lack of expressions on his face and the small twitch of his lips as he speaks to Aegon, looking around him without really showing any emotion.
That eye contact takes the air out of you. The memory of all the things you shared, the conversations, the looks, the touching and kissing… it all comes over you.
And at that very moment, as if sensing the weight of your attention, Aemond looks up and sees you beyond the crowd, apart and alone. The visual connection is instantaneous, almost electric, and suddenly you feel all the people and bustle around you fade away.
You can't deny the attraction and deep affection that, even now, beat intensely in your chest. And, for an instant, you wonder if he too feels the same mix of nostalgia and sadness in the midst of it all.
You notice how he looks you up and down, lingering on every detail of what you're wearing today, his eyes shining, filled with a kind of wary hope and longing, completely stealing your breath.
Then, his body language tells you he's getting ready to move. Coming at you, with her determined gaze.
Oh God.
A sense of panic invades every part of your body. And before he can do anything, you look away and quickly make your way to the dance floor, blending into the crowd, heading towards your friends.
The music booms in your ears and your thoughts are in complete chaos, hitting you one after the other.
Closing your eyes for a moment, you tell yourself that you just want to enjoy the night, to stop thinking about him and what was, even if it's only for a few hours.
So time passes, the energy of the dance becomes more relaxed, and though you manage to avoid crossing paths directly with Aemond, his presence seems to haunt your mind like a lingering ghost, one that doesn't dissipate with the music or the bright lights.
You look around from time to time, and out of the corner of your eye you notice that he also seems to avoid being too close to you, although you can't help thinking that maybe he is also looking for you in the crowd, as you are looking for him.
Until, finally, the atmosphere immediately changes.
The lights dim and the silver and warm tones transform the room into an intimate place. Couples begin to approach the dance floor, holding hands, to dance to the slow songs. And you decide it's the perfect time to take a break.
You smile at Cregan and Alysanne, giving them another moment again, feeling a twinge of tenderness and, at the same time, unexpected loneliness.
You take a seat at one of the nearby tables, watching as the dance floor fills with couples slowly swaying to the music.
Dresses and suits intertwine, and for a moment, you let yourself be enveloped by the warmth of the atmosphere, allowing yourself to feel invisible in the midst of all that harmony.
You watch Floris dancing with that boy, Alysanne with Cregan of course, and Helaena dancing with her friend, both with amused smiles and talking softly without taking the slow dance so seriously. You also see Aegon dancing very close with a girl.
And as your eyes wander around the dance floor, your gaze focuses again on his figure, which seems just as lonely as yours.
A few tables away, Aemond sits alone, surveying the dance floor with an expression you fail to fully decipher. His fingers drum on the rim of his glass, and, for a moment, he seems lost in his own thoughts. He looks calm, almost vulnerable.
You stare at him longer than you think and sigh, averting your gaze, and as the seconds pass, the urge to stand still and do nothing begins to fade.
You bite the inside of your cheek and begin to move your foot up and down rapidly, feeling your heart begin to beat too fast. You watch all the people dancing again, hesitating.
Then you let out a long breath and without knowing exactly why, you take a deep breath and stand up. With slow steps, a momentum and a calmness you try to maintain, you head towards him.
As you get closer, you notice how his gaze, which was lost on the dance floor, suddenly focuses on you, noticing before out of the corner of his eye your approaching figure. Surprise and bewilderment mixed with something else appears in his gaze and you stop in front of him, nervous but determined.
Then neither of you say anything for a few moments. The same nerves make you unable to speak and the two of you just stand there, watching each other.
You feel how some people around you suddenly have their attention focused on both of you, waiting for what you will do, but you don't even pay attention to them. You just focus completely on him.
Until you sigh.
"Do you dance?" you ask softly and nervous.
The words seem to break the spell, and Aemond blinks, clearly surprised and somehow confused.
You watch the expression on his face, as if he's processing every word you've just said, looking for some hint of doubt or change of heart in your expression.
"S-sure," he says still confused, not expecting this at all.
There's a mix of emotions in his eyes, confusion, surprise and nervousness, something you wouldn't have expected to see in him. And you, not wanting to drag this out any longer than necessary, extend your hand to him.
He watches your face attentively and then your hand, still surprised, to finally take it gently. His fingers intertwine with yours, sending an electricity throughout your body through his touch as he stands up.
You swallow hard, feeling your heart beating like crazy and nervousness invading your whole system. And without another word, you both head for the dance floor.
Then, everything around you fades away, the murmurs and laughter, even the music itself becomes a distant whisper, and only he remains, next to you.
He places a hand on your waist, his touch delicate, as if he doesn't want to do anything that could break this fragile instant. You take his other hand, intertwining it with yours and as you both begin to move to the rhythm of the music, you feel how a mixture of emotions floods each of your senses.
Aemond watches you, his eyes fixed on yours and with a nervous little smile on his lips, as if he can't believe this is really happening.
The music moves forward, slow, allowing you to glide in front of each other. As his steps synchronize with yours, the movements become smooth and natural.
And in a moment you realize that you both are completely absorbed in each other, as if nothing and no one could interrupt this bubble that surrounds you.
Finally, Aemond breaks the silence, his voice barely audible over the music and shy, watching you with a gleam in his eye.
"You look beautiful."
He says to you, his words so sincere and emotionally charged that you feel a surge of warmth wash over you.
You wish his words didn't make you melt. But they do. And everything about him, every gesture, his closeness, the firm, protective touch of his hand on your waist, the way he holds you, as if you were something precious and delicate, envelops and intoxicates you.
"Thank you," you reply, feeling a soft smile appear on your lips, "You too... you look very handsome."
He smiles, marking the dimples on either side of his cheeks.
"I wasn't expecting you to come over," he admits, his eyes revealing something between vulnerability and surprise.
The tone of his voice, so soft and honest, makes you feel a warmth you haven't experienced in a long time.
"I didn't know I would," you reply with a barely perceptible smile, "But I thought, maybe... I don't want to spend the night running away," you confess.
He nods, not looking away.
"I didn't want it to be like that either."
His hand on your waist pulls you slightly closer to him with a firm movement and the slight brush makes you aware of the closeness between the two of you.
You feel your thoughts cloud over and you let yourself become more enveloped by him, unable to help it.
His chin brushes your forehead and you feel that at any moment your heart will jump out of your chest. It's an insistent, powerful beat that seems to resonate with every breath you take at his side.
Then, Aemond lowers his voice, his tone becoming softer, almost melancholy, as if his words are a secret shared only between the two of you.
"I was going to ask you if you wanted to be my date that day, you know? When I gave you the folder.
"I was going to ask you if you wanted to be my date that day, you know, when I gave you the folder," he confesses, with a certain melancholy tone, "But I knew it wouldn't be fair to ask you that and I really didn't want to hurt you anymore."
The sincerity in his tone pierces you, and you feel your own barriers begin to crumble. You listen to him with your heart pounding, absorbing every word.
Aemond sighs and his fingers tighten slightly at your waist.
"And a moment ago, when I saw you so perfect and so beautiful in this dress... I realized how much I wished I had walked through those doors with you on my arm," he says with a longing and sadness.
The music continues to envelop you and you feel his confession reverberate through you, intensifying every sensation, every emotion.
The strength of his words, of the connection that has been created between the two of you in the middle of this song, makes the air seem thick and charged with meanings that don't need to be explained.
Then you raise your gaze to him and you both stare at each other in silence, where your words seem to get caught in your throat.
His eyes roam over your face, as if he wants to remember every detail, as if he wants to take this moment with him. There is a sadness and a softness in his gaze that you haven't seen before, and it makes something in your chest tighten.
And again his voice breaks through the soft silence that envelops you.
"I'm sorry... for everything," he says barely a whisper, laden with a sincerity that resonates deeply.
His fingers trace slow circles on your back, small gestures that seem to try to comfort you and to comfort him too. The contact between the two of you is firm and warm, and yet, you feel as if Aemond fears that at any moment this could disappear.
For a moment, the music seems to fade, leaving only your heartbeat and the echo of his voice in the air.
You feel the urge to speak, to say something that would ease the vulnerability on his face, but you find it difficult to organize your thoughts.
Instead, you opt for a simple but meaningful gesture. You propel yourself a little towards him and leave a soft kiss on his cheek, then rest your head on his chest and gently inhale his expensive cologne, being comforting enough for you.
"It's okay," you murmur.
He lets out a sigh of relief, mixed with longing and makes his grip on your waist tighter, not wanting to let go. Then, he leaves a soft kiss on the crown of your head, resting his head on yours as you both continue to sway gently to the music.
"Thank you for giving me this dance," he murmurs.
You place a soft, small smile on your lips, then raise your gaze to his, watching him with nothing but fondness.
He continues to watch you with that softness and one of his hands goes up to your cheek. In a delicate, almost fearful touch, his thumb runs over your skin in a gesture that is both protective and vulnerable.
Then he rests his forehead against yours and you both close your eyes, as you lean into him.
You both fall silent, letting the slow rhythm of the music carry you away, allowing the moment to linger, in a fragile and honest peace.
You feel that you could stay like this, in this bubble of time and silence, without the need for words, because, in this instant, you both understand what has been said and what doesn't need to be said.
The song changes to another slow one and you both lose yourselves in the moment, enjoying it, not wanting it to end.
Time seems to stand still as you dance together, moving slowly and leisurely, as if nothing and no one else exists. The sounds of the party fade around you, leaving only the beating of your hearts and the faint brush of your breaths.
Your eyes close as you let go, feeling his hand on your back and the warmth his body gives off, so close and so full of meaning.
You both breathe in sync, your foreheads resting against each other, your eyes closed as the moment stretches out and becomes more than just a dance.
This instant is a truce, a refuge where everything else, the doubts, the pain, the past, is suspended and what follows is moving forward.
"You've got everything ready to go to college?"
His voice breaks the silence softly, barely a murmur, as if afraid to disturb the peace around you both.
"Yeah," you murmur, nodding.
"What are you traveling there on?"
"Well, I was checking with my dad about bus and plane ticket prices. But I still haven't made up my mind," you admit, remembering discussions about which was the safest and cheapest option.
Aemond nods, thoughtfully. Then, after a brief pause, he speaks with calm assurance.
"I can take you."
You look at him instantly surprised, definitely not expecting that.
"What?"
"I can take you," he repeats, sure of his words, "Well, sure, if you want," he hastens to clarify, "After all, we're going to the same place and I'll make the trip in my car," he explains, "There's plenty of room for your bags along with mine and so you won't have to spend on a ticket. Besides, it would be safer and I think, I don't know, you'd be more comfortable."
You remain silent, trying to assimilate what he has just said. There is something in his words, in the slow and sincere tone, that strikes a deep chord in you.
The idea of making the trip together, of sharing that important moment of departure, of having one last time alone before facing a new life, awakens a mix of emotions that are difficult to describe.
He lowers his gaze for a moment, nervous, clarifying in a low voice.
"It's just a suggestion... something I thought might make things easier for you. You don't have to do it if you don't want to."
Your heart pounds, and somehow, the simplicity of his offer, the naturalness with which he cares for you, causes a warm surge of gratitude and affection to wash over you.
"Can you really do that for me?" you ask quietly, with a little smile you can't help.
"Sure," he says absurdly softly, as if it weren't obvious, "But only if you want me to. I don't want to force you. It's just an option."
You look up at him, holding his gaze for a second that seems like forever, and nod slowly, allowing the feeling of relief and closeness to wash over you.
"I'd love to," you whisper, your voice barely a murmur, "Thank you."
The shadow of a smile tugs at his lips, and you can see the relief in his expression.
"No need to thanks."
Without another word, Aemond pulls you a little closer to him and again the two of you bring your foreheads together, letting the moment lengthen as the music changes to another slow rhythm.
You both remain like that, moving in silence and enjoying the moment, spending the last moment of your high school lives together, to start college together.
"Are you ready?"
Aemond watches you from the driver's seat, his hands resting calmly on the steering wheel with a small smile on his face.
The car is already loaded with suitcases for both of you and you nod, taking a deep breath to calm the emotions fluttering in your chest.
The thought of heading off together towards this new stage causes a mixture of nerves and excitement to wash over you, though a part of you also feels comforted by Aemond's presence at your side.
"Yes," you reply, adjusting your belt.
You watch him and he gives you one last knowing look before putting the car in move.
Saying goodbye to your dad was difficult, but it was something you were both already preparing for and you knew that moment would come.
Besides, he met Aemond, as your friend who will do you the favor of driving you to college and nothing more. And your dad felt safer with that instead of taking the plane or bus alone.
Especially after Aemond promised him countless times that he would take care of you at all times.
The road is serene at first, and Aemond turns on the radio, letting a soft melody fill the comfortable silence between them.
The roads stretch out in front of you, long and exciting, as the landscape changes shape and the kilometers pass, leaving behind the city where you experienced so much.
From time to time, you exchange glances, small comments about the places you see and the expectations each has for the university.
Aemond seems especially careful, attentive to every sign on the road and every change in your expression, as if he wants to make sure you are comfortable and at ease.
And he especially notices a change in your expression.
"Is something bothering you?" he asks you, his voice low but close, filling the space in a comforting way.
You watch him and after some hesitation, you shrug.
"I guess it makes me a little nervous not knowing what to expect," you admit, "This whole new stage... the idea of being alone in a new place."
Aemond nods, understanding what you mean, his eyes fixed on the road.
"I guess it's normal," he tells you softly, "It's almost obligatory to feel this way, but, for what it's worth... you won't be completely alone."
His gaze meets yours for a second before he turns back to the road.
"I'm going to be around if at any time you need anything or anything happens, anything at all."
You feel a warmth settle in your chest, and a part of your nerves seem to fade. The idea of him being there, close by, offering you that closeness, gives you a strange sense of relief.
"Thank you, Aemond," you murmur with a small smile.
He smiles, marking a dimple in his cheek, and turns his eyes to the front.
The ride continues, where the atmosphere in the car becomes more and more comfortable, chatting about small details, expectations, and the occasional joke that makes you both laugh comfortably.
And finally, as the two enter the town of Oldtown and the university looms in the distance, Aemond slows down, looking at the campus that would soon become his home.
"There it is," he says, a slight excitement in his voice.
The same excitement rubs off on you and excitedly, you take his hand, intertwining it with yours, excited and hopeful.
Hopeful that all that is to come for you in this place are good and promising things. As well as hopeful for Aemond and for you.
series taglist:
@melsunshine @at-a-rax-ia @jxdegodfrey @ttkttt @yentroucnagol @kate-to-the-ki @iamavailablesstuff @bluerskiees @urmomsgirlfriend1 @toodlesxcuddles @rosie-posie08 @iloveallmyboys @bellaisasleep @deliaseastar @cupcakesminicakescupcakes @dixie-elocin @lilostif16 @wickedfrsgrl @a-beaverhausen @saturnssrings @ladythornofrivia @vhwyrm @strangersunghoon @queen-of-elves
#aemond targaryen#aemond targaryen fanfiction#aemond targaryen x reader#aemond targaryen fanfic#aemond targaryen x you#hotd aemond#aemond fanfiction#aemond x reader#aemond targaryen x y/n#modern aemond#modern hotd#au modern#aemond one eye
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Cute ways the jjk girls (+ genderbends) use jujutsu in your relationship
A/n:I initially had this ideal with fem!gojo, but then it expanded to other characters. Let me know if you have any ideas for a part 2 or something with other characters
Also I kinda did something similar with fem!inumaki here if you're interested
Fem! Gojo
Lapse blue
Y/n:Hey babe, do you mind grabbing me that glass of water?
Fem!gojo:sure thing sweetie
[She uses blue to make the glass float toward you, but the water splashes on your face]
Y/n:......
Fem!gojo:s-sorry
Infinity
Y/n:Come on, tori, I already told you I'm sorry
[You try to hug her, but infinity stops you]
Y/n:Can you please deactivate your technique?
Fem!gojo:No way! You ate my last mochi. That's basically the same as cheating. I'm not letting you hug me
Y/n:[sighs] I'll buy you some other ones ok? And some more cakes
[Gojo immediately turns off infinity and hugs you]
Fem!gojo:Thanks, y/nnnnn! I knew you loved me
Six eyes
Fem!gojo:Hey y/n, what happened?
Y/n:what do you mean?
Fem!gojo:Your shoulder, it's all hurt and purple
Y/n:.....how did you know? I'm wearing a sweater
Fem!gojo:I have really good eyes remember?
Y/n:oh yeah, I forgot about the six eyes, sorry I got hurt during a mission and just didn't wanna bother you
Fem!gojo:it's never a bother for me, I'll just call shoko and bring you an ice pack
Fem!sukuna
Heian era form
Y/n:Kuna.....is this really necessary?
[It shows you being carried by 2 of sukuna's arms while an other one is stroking your hair]
Fem!sukuna:Of course, are you saying you don't like this?
Y/n:No, I do it's just......why?
Fem!sukuna:uraume said I should try being more affectionate with you. This is how I do it.
Y/n:I guess your arms are pretty comfy
Fem!sukuna:good, I don't want to hear you complain
[She kisses you while you blush harder]
Yuki tsukumo
Star rage
(Tbh I forgot if this is exactly how the technique works)
[You're trying to open a jar, but it's too tight]
Yuki:Do you need some help, baby?
Y/n:Yeah thanks
[You give her the jar, and she opens it without problems]
Yuki:here you go
Y/n:Thanks
Yuki:could I get a kiss for that~?
Y/n:[giggle] sure
[You kiss her cheek, and she smiles brightly]
Yuki[talking to herself] yes! I know using my technique was worth it
Y/n:......what do you mean using your technique?
Yuki:o-oh nothing
Y/n:Wait, did you put mass in the lid so I couldn't open and jar and you'd get a kiss?
Yuki:..........noooooo what are you talking about? Hehe
Y/n:If you wanted a kiss you could have just asked for one you know?
Garuda
Y/n:...........yuki, can you tell your shikigami to stop following me?
Yuki:Why? It's not that bad
Y/n:it wasn't but I think it's taking it a bit too far
[Garuda completely wraps itself around you]
Y/n:see
Yuki:that just means it likes you, just like me
Y/n:....I guess that's nice then, but it's still kinda uncomfortable
Yuki:ok, I'll tell it to stop, we both know you very much prefer my hugs anyway
Yorozu
(I've decided i wanna write for her too, I'll add her to the masterlist now and I chose her instead of mai not only because her creation is better but also just because I kinda like her more)
Creation
Yorozu:y/n! Look what I made for us
[She shows you two rings with your names engraved on them]
Yorozu:it took me a while, but I finally did it! Now we will be bound together even more than we already are
Y/n:Oh thanks, that's so sweet....even if we aren't married yet
Yorozu: Those are just details. What's wrong with thinking ahead
Y/n:hehe, alright
[You start to take the ring with your name on it but she stops you]
Yorozu:Oh no, darling, you'll be wearing the one with my name so that everyone knows you're mine, and I'll wear the other one so that everyone knows I'm yours
Y/n:Oh, that's....sweet
Yorozu:I'm glad you think that, I can't have anyone thinking my darling is free to take, here I'll even put it on you myself
Fem!megumi
Ten shadows:divine dogs (and mahoraga)
Y/n:Please, gumi, I swear I won't ask you anything else ever
Fem!megumi:[sighs] you're really like I love you.....alright
[She does the hand sign and summons the dogs]
Fem!megumi:Go smell y/n and find their hoodie
[The shikigami do what she said and start searching for it]
Y/n:Thanks, you're a lifesaver megumi
Fem!megumi:you're welcome just don't get used to it
[The dogs eventually find the hoodie and give it to you]
Y/n:Oh, thanks so much to you two too. You're such good boys
[You start petting them while megumi gets closer to you]
Fem!megumi:wait minute.....that hoodie isn't it nobara's? Why does it have your smell on it
Y/n:oh no I can explain she just gave-
Fem!megumi:I don't need any explanation. With this treasure I summon
Y/n:wait no stop it!
Fem!geto
Cursed spirit manipulation
Gojo:Hey, geto, what are you waiting for? We're gonna be late for the mission
Fem!geto:don't be so impatient satoru, I'm just waiting for y/n
Gojo:Come on! Your partner can wait, I just wanna get this over with
Fem!geto:if they don't come, I'm not going either
Gojo:fiiiine, you're the only thing that makes missions interesting anyway
[After waiting for a bit geto looks at the sky]
Fem!geto:oh looks like they arrived
Gojo:hm?
[They look up to see you riding rainbow dragon]
Gojo:You made them ride on your curse?
Fem!geto:they were gonna be late and asked me
Gojo:that's so cool you have to make me ride on it too sometimes
Fem!geto:[sighs] I suppose one time is ok
#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen#x reader#jjk x reader#jjk#gojo x reader#female gojo x reader#sukuna x reader#female sukuna x reader#yuki tsukumo x reader#yuki tsukumo#yorozu x reader#yorozu#jjk yorozu#megumi fushiguro x reader#female megumi x reader#geto x reader#female geto x reader#gn reader#satoru gojo x reader#satoru gojo#ryomen sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna#fem sukuna#fem gojo#fem megumi#female gojo#female sukuna#female megumi fushiguro x reader#female megumi
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There are some blogs optimistic about Tommy back at some point, what are your thoughts about it?
I don't want to get too optimistic, because that's how we got ourselves here in the first place. Let's be honest. This was always a possibility and was even laid out as a possibility in the articles/interviews, we just chose to get too high on the hope. We were treating it as a sure thing and that was never the case. We duped ourselves a little on this one, and yes, I'm absolutely including myself.
Now, as many have pointed out (which I absolutely agree with) if you were to be completely oblivious about the articles and/or what they said, the breakup very much looks like it's open ended. It looks like something that's unresolved or meant to be resolved at a later date. They made it something that could be resolved. Something like moving away or wanting completely different things in life is a lot harder to work through and more definative. They clearly both want to be with each other. Tommy said he wanted to be Buck's last. He said he wouldn't be able to deal with the (what he thought was inevitable) heartbreak. You only get hurt that deep when you lose something you wanted that bad.
This is honestly the first time we ever heard Buck even utter the words "engaged" or "married" to any of his SOs. I do think it's something he wanted down the road, I just don't think he was there yet, and that's absolutely fine. The relationship was still very new. There was clearly a lot they didn't know about each other yet.
It was far too soon to make the commitment of moving in, and Tommy was just trying to stop things from getting any further before he got too deep (too late, me thinks.)
If you remove the clear bias of the journalists writing these "exit interviews" (is that even a thing in television?) they start to sound much like your run of the mill interview they do with every main after they have a major storyline play out on screen. Look at the direct quotes, not what the journalists are inferring for themselves.
All that being said, I'm not getting my hopes up, and I'm not planning on watching live again until I have a definite as to where the storyline is going, and if that takes until the final episode ever, so be it. I will get back to it eventually. Until then, I'll be keeping tabs on what's going on through Tumblr.
Now, this is just a little thought in my brain that has absolutely nothing to back it up whatsoever. I think maybe either Lou needed this break to get away from the bs and finish his role on SWAT, or they gave it to him and he's taking it.
We know he was surprised, but what he was surprised about was how soon it happened. Tells me that at least a temporary break was planned, just not until further down. Or maybe he only meant the disagreement.
We very much know Tim likes to plan out his story about 5 seconds in advance, there could be a tentative plan to maybe bring Tommy back down the road, say, after the midseason hiatus. Could even be the "project that may or may not be happening" that Lou had mentioned.
Buck is my favorite character, but I'm not interested in seeing him regress or go through the same storyline for the millionth time. If he doesn't at least try and fight for Tommy or talk things out with him, it's just more of the same season 5 Buck. I love 99% of the other characters too, but they also suffer from the Groundhog's Day writing and I'm just old and tired.
#one thing you can always count on me for is a long winded answer that you probably didn't want#but thanks all the same! i love interacting with y'all!#hope for the best but expect the worst basically#bucktommy#911 abc#tv shows#asked and answered#anon#and yes if we don't see some type of resolution one way or the other then that's just piss poor writing
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Lmao hey arcane fandom
I'm going to spew my two cents and try to get yall to see why I will defend Cait with my WHOLE LIFE IF NEEDED
I love Vi too btw, don't get me wrong, they both need their foreheads kissed
EDIT: Also, I'm gonna put this here since ppl thought othervise: This is not a post against Vi, she's my goat, she needs to retire from bad shit happening to her. This is a post defending Cait, since she's the character getting the most hate rn, and I will defend basically every arcane character with my whole chest (exepct Heimerdinger, fuck that hoe)
Spoilers
Ok, let me start with the whole breakup scene and the things that led to it, since that's basically one of the biggest points in this argument. I'm going to be honest, I kinda feel like Vi was a little af fault there. Because now, because Caitlyn couldn't kill Jinx, even when she could've, she will have to do the whole hunt again. AGAIN. And we know Cait is only hurting Zaun because she WILL comb through an entire city just to find Jinx, and nothing else. She doesn't hate the people of Zaun. And it could've stopped at that one incident with the grey IF she killed Jinx. But she didn't, because Vi stopped her. Again.
And let me tell you, if I went through all that shit, WITH the support of my bae, just to be stopped at the last moment I'd be pissed too.
"Oh, but Caitlyn didn't care if she accidentally killed the kid," let me remind yall of that moment when Jayce accidently killed a kid in season one with the hextech weapons, and wanted to stop using them, but Vi was like, "hey, it happens a bunch here, let's not stop using these things for fighting!" And literally said "He knew what he was signing up for." But now she suddenly cares about one kid? Plus what's the chance of Cait ACTUALLY missing? And even if she did, and killed Isha...Jinx killed multiple people yall, probably even kids (including her brothers) but yall love her (me too but that's besides the point).
Cait is now driven by revenge. And let's not pretend we didn't see this change coming. The whole bullet board thing she had on the floor in season one, the dedication to free a random prisoner just to get clues about Silco...she was always dedicated to her craft. And the raige started to appear in her even in the final episode, where she got KIDNAPPED BY JINX, let me remind yall, and she had to literally free herself. Just imagine how traumatic that shit was for her. Then, when she could've shot her abductor, her bae stops her, letting Jinx slip away and go on to kill her mother. But, she's still not blaming Vi, and wants her on her team, just to be stopped at the last moment again.
Next thing is the fact that she becomes a dictator...well, she could've said no when Ambessa said her name, right? Yeah, no. That's not how it works. She couldn't have been like "yeah, no, I don't wanna do allat, I'm still kinda liking the enemy after they keep attacking us, so ima pass on this one", for some reason. Ambessa literally made sure that she can't pass this up. Plus she caught her almost right after she returned from Zaun, and leaving Vi. She was in a vulnerable, revenge hungry state.
Ok, yap session over, I'm writing this at 1 am, and I have work tomorrow at 6, so I'm cooked, but Cait Cait Cait Cait Cait Cait Cait
#arcane#my glorious queen caitlyn#leage of legends#caitlyn kiramman#caitvi#caitlyn arcane#vi x caitlyn#arcane season 2#arcane spoilers#arcane s2#vi arcane#jinx arcane
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Hi um so I usually don't see these but I was thinking a Mirage and Cybortron! Reader but the scene where Mirage brings Noah to the place where they're supposed to meet up with the other autobots but reader gets to Mirgae first before the others and of course is happy to see him cause they're conjux but gets mad when he sees he brought Noah so of course they have a little spat on what they should do with him before the others arrive than of course the other autobots come in
This is so cute I’ll definitely give it a try
Transformers Knightverse!Mirage x Cybertronian!GN!Reader Oneshot: A Human
TW/Tags: Mostly just fluff, reader and Mirage argue for a bit, Noah feels like a child and he hates it, Reader has a soft spot for Mirage and he abuses it >:3, cutesy couple moments, OP gives you that “really?” Look at some point. This was so fun to write for Mirage I adore the little gremlin.
You and Mirage have known each other for a pretty good while. Even before the war. You are the same height as bumblebee. And even during the time he admitted his feelings towards you. Apparently he’s into bots taller than him.
When you all got to the planet earth, you all had to hide. Causing you and Mirage to separate. Until one day when you got a message from Optimus Prime to meet up you knew this meant for you all to see each other. This including seeing your Conjunx. Mirage. As you drove to the spot you got there after he did.
”Oh here comes my boo. What a master at work with their boo.” Mirage said to the human Noah as Noah held a pipe as defense. He watched as he saw you transform. He was amazed as mirage only smiled like the silly bot he is.
You were pretty well built. With The right amount of slim and well build frame as you has sword in handles on both sides of your hips. Your optics were yellow then blue and you noticed the human once you came in. Your voice was soft but strong. having a softer tone then what most expect.
“Mirage what have you done? You brought a human here? What if Optimus sees him?”
You walked up to Mirage as he also made his way to you. “Mm! Boy did I miss that voice baby. Just like I miss them lips.” He avoided the question as his cervos grabbed one of yours and one of your cervos as he tries to pull you down by your chest plate. But you don’t indulge. Your other cervo moving to his helm.
You placed a digit on his dermas as you spoke.”I’ll deal with you later.”
You’d walk past him as he stuttered. “You know I would be more scared if I wasn’t so turned on right now!” He tries to get around you as you made your way to the human.
”Now now baby listen I can explain. Things just happened and well- he kinda got stuck with me during a police chase and uh-“
”Police?!” You looked at him as you both stood in front of Noah. Mirage looking up at you as he moved his arms around explaining himself. Noah just stared up at you two. Feeling like a kid as he watched his parents argue over something he did. Noah even calmed his guard down a bit as it still seemed your argument will keep going. As he then tried to slowly escape. “Mirage you should’ve known better.”
”Hey baby. Baby. I promise this will be great. Not all humans are bad and I can prove it with him.” He gestured to Noah. Who stopped once Bee and the others came. Including Optimus.
When Optimus spoke about Noah when he picked hm up. And Mirage tried to stand up for himself. Optimus, one of your closest friends looked at you for a second opinion. He always trusted your opinion despite when you became Mirages Conjunx during the war. You felt the pang in your spark bond with Mirage. You noticed he looked at you with puppy blue eyes……darn it. You let out a sigh and told Optimus that there’s nothing else they can do. They’re stuck with this human. But maybe he can help us if we let him live.
Mirage stared at you with joy. Optimus groaned but agreed. Noah even looked at you surprised that you protected him. Even when you glanced at him for a moment to be sure he’s alright. He looked down in an almost shy way. The Mirage and Noah speak about him joining them.
Then Mirage spoke about Noah selling him which made you send an annoyance through the bond causing him to groan a bit. Cause bee and Arcee to chuckle as he seemed almost in pain but kept speaking to Noah.
”What about the big guy.” Noah asked
”You let me worry about him.” Mirage responded and then Noah looked at you.
”And your whole situation with your…?.” Noah kinda whispered to Mirage. Mirage doing the same thing.
”You let me handle them too. Don’t worry they’ll warm up to you before ya know it.”
”Cool?” Noah took a moment but then nodded. Mirage got excited now that Noah was a part of the team.
As the other speak of what to do and speak of leaving. The others go their separate ways to rest after all they all had a long drive. During that time Mirage told Noah to just stay close to Bee. Bee not paying much mind as Noah just stood there. Contemplating his life.
Mirage walked up to you as you leaned against the wall. Checking out your swords as you glanced at him as he got closer. You stood straighter as he wrapped his arms around your waist. His chin against your chest. All you can see is his big blue eyes. “Thank you for helping me babe. You really love meee.”
“Oh course I do.” You put your sword away as you placed a cervo on the back of his helm. “I just hope you know what you’re doing Mirage. I cant always save you, ya know.” Your other cervo now on his shoulder. His optics now looked sad as he pulled back a bit.
”I know… But I’ll prove it to you and OP! I just got a feeling. Relax babe. I know what I’m doing. Remember?” You sighed as he spoke.
He looked up at you with big blue eyes as he had his usual grin on his face. Man you were so weak to that smile. And just him your usual gentle smile and leaned down. Both of your dermas connecting as you both close your optics. After all..
You can never say no to that face.
I honestly really enjoyed writing this. I kinda want to do the rest of the movie with these two but you guys let me know if you want more. As always I hope you all enjoy and as always Requests are open.
#transformers rise of the beasts#tf rotb#tf mirage#tf Rotb mirage#tf mirage x reader#x reader#transformers#transformers x reader
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Hello I have a request how would all the papyrus’s react if the reader came up to them and gave them a spontaneous kiss and walked away like nothing happened like a tease
Ps love your writing keep it up with the good work 🙏🏽
Ahhh hi! Nice to see you in my inbox hehe this is a fun ask and I had some motivation before work so I thought I'd get it done! Thanks for the kind words! Hope you enjoy ::3! Just saw this said the Papyri but I went ahead and did the sans too lol.
⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚。⋆ ˚
Undertale
Sans:
Chuckles as he watches you walk away. He doesn't do anything about it for a bit before he pulls the same thing with a little extra spice. He waits till you're doing something before coming over and pulling you close to him pressing kisses along your jawline till he kisses you on the lips and then walks away with a satisfied grin. What happens next is up to you.
Papyrus:
Blushes from the kiss and watches you walk away in shock. He thinks about it for the awhile not really realizing you're teasing him and just assuming you wanted to surprise him with a kiss before coming up with his own plan to kiss you back. He sets up an elaborate scheme that has way too many parts and it all ends with him giving you a little smooch. It's all really dramatic and a little goofy but in the end you got a kiss from your sweet datemate!
Underfell
Red:
Blushes bright red and then smirks before chasing after you. When he finally corners you he presses you up against the wall and slides a leg in between yours. "can't get away that easy sweetheart." He purrs as he leans in and kisses you passionately slipping his tongue into your mouth the first chance he gets as his hands slide down your body.
Edge:
Stunned for a second before smirking and grabbing you by the hips to pull you back into his chest. "WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING PET." He'd say with a husky voice in your ear as his hands firmly hold you against him and he pressed himself into you. He bites down gently where your shoulder meets your neck and then releases you. "KEEP BEING A TEASE AND I'LL HAVE TO PUNISH YOU." He says lovingly and then walks away with a smirk.
Underswap
Blue:
He leans into the kiss as you pull away and looks at you with a small pout before smirking as you walk away. It's so on. The rest of the day is full of Blue teasing you. "Accidentally" rubbing up against you or whispering naughty things in your ear while you're doing something. You may have won the first battle but that's because he let you, now he's determined to win the war and he won't stop until you're begging him to go further.
Stretch:
He blushes from the surprise kiss but returns it quickly and tries to wrap his hands around your waist but you're already backing away. "aww honey don't be a tease." He says as you walk off with a satisfied smirk. He waits a bit before enacting his revenge, which is him pulling you onto the couch into his lap and refusing to let you go as he nuzzles into the crook of your neck.
Horrortale:
Axe:
He stiffens up when you kiss him out of no where his thoughts short circuiting. He blushes a nice deep blue and simply watches you walk away his eyelight expanded to fill his socket. He stands there for a bit before continuing on with what he was doing. He'll probably forget it happened so it's easy to get him again and again and see his adorable reaction.
Willow:
He smiles at the kiss also doesn't really realize you're teasing him. "Thank You Dear I Love You" he calls out softly as he watches you walk away. He thinks about the kiss all day until he works up the courage to find you and kiss you back. He'll walk up shyly and try to figure out how he wants to do this as with his bad back he could bend over but it would hurt. So he picks you up underneath your armpits gently and presses a kiss to your lips softly. Then he sets you down turns a bright orange and makes a smooth escape.
#undertale fandom#undertale fanfiction#sans undertale#sans x reader#sans x you#underswap#underfell sans#underswap sans#headcanons#underfell#horrortale#my headcanons#sans#papyrus headcanons#papyrus x reader#papyrus undertale#underswap papyrus#papyrus#underfell sans x reader#underfell au#underswap au#ut au#underswap sans x reader#swap papyrus#undertale multiverse#horrortale sans x reader#horrortale sans#horror papyrus#horror sans#underfell papyrus
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Chapter 57 Cope Posting
Not like this, dear void... not like this. The blessing/curse of Kagurabachi chapters ending in 7 being absolute banger cliffhangers continues and there is not enough copium in the world to get me through to next week. This entry is an absolute mess...
Let's start with practicing on the editor's comments again. Sorry if the colours are hard to read on brighter backgrounds, I live in Dark Mode as much as possible.
First page: ハクリが飛宗の転送に成功! そして- [Hakuri ga Tobimune no tensou ni seikou! Soshite-, Hakuri successfully transfers Tobimune! And then-] Last page: 座村, 漆羽… 事態は混沌へ��� [Samura, Uruha... jitai ha konton he..., Samura, Uruha... the situation turns chaotic...] noting that the word used for "situation", jitai (事態), specifically has negative connotations (as opposed to 状況 [joukyou], which is neutral).
These comments are rarely more than fluff just to give the editors some presence in the work itself, so I don't take them as definite indicators of anything going on in the plot. But man. Man. "Bad situation" seems to be putting it lightly. I was ready to take you off the list of possible traitors, Samura! I was seriously going to do it! Whyyyyyyyyyyy
Chihiro and the Pink Menace
Fine, first up... school?
How does our cast stack up to the average student after getting home schooled in murder and cool action poses?
It was obvious to everyone that this arc would involve Chihiro learning about the unpleasant sides of his dad's legacy. So this is just a "hey don't forget" moment for us that also highlights how far removed Hiruhiko and Chihiro are from regular society. Those two (and Hakuri) should be in their last year of high school, complaining about homework or stressing about their future college/job plans right now instead of fighting to the death. Poor guys.
I don't want to presume too much about Hokazono-sensei's views, but I really like directly acknowledging that winners write history and so their wartime cruelty is often downplayed or re-framed as heroism. These kids and even Chihiro only know the revised version of what happened, not the truth of the matter.
Home schooled Chihiro confirmed! Kinda!
Anyway, some more John Plan Reveal. He wants Chihiro to learn the truth about his father's legacy and the impact it's had- that's why he hasn't been "harvested" yet. This implies that there's some terrible thing that could upend Chihiro's entire worldview to be learned. But we kind of already knew that based on everything I just said.
I hope this isn't a flag for John trying to convince Chihiro to join him. There are awful secrets that are going to be unearthed about Kunishige and the Kamunabi this arc for sure, but it's kind of a waste of our time to do the "oooh it was worse than you thought why don't you join us to set things right" rigamarole.
Obviously the Hishaku have some compelling reasons to do all this if they can get someone as loath to kill as Samura on their side to murk his war buddies. It's just never gonna convince Chihiro so I hope we don't get a moralizing yapfest to accompany John's outstretched hand. I trust the writing though! So far it's been almost nothing but excellence so... chill, me. Just wait and see.
I think that no matter what happens Chihiro will continue to forge his own path with allies who care for him at his side. He won't choose the government's path, or the Hishaku's, or even his dad's- he'll create something new. Standard stuff for a shounen series but I never get tired of seeing it!
Before moving on to the coping session, there's something neat in this scene that I want to ramble about:
Local yapper yaps while the guy listening to him literally overthinks
I'll use the JP version if I have to, but I like how Chihiro's inner monologue deliberately overruns Hiruhiko's speech bubble to show that he's not paying full attention while his thoughts are in overdrive. He's still partially listening but he's not quite as composed as he appears to be on the outside, which is confirmed by the close-up zoom into his stressed look with the sweat drops. Yet when we zoom out, he seems a bit more put-together like usual. He's still exhausted from yesterday, man! Really should have rested up... at least the author acknowledges it. (Forced bed rest soon? Hopefully?)
This is how Hiruhiko was able to get the drop on Chihiro. Chihiro's got a lot on his mind and he has trouble focusing, just like Uruha chided him for on the train. His resolve is unshaken but he's still prone to wavering in the moment as he tries to process things. He even misses the fist time Samura's name was mentioned! Clearly Chihiro needs Hakuri or Uruha or someone there to yell encouragement at the right time to stop him from getting lost in his own head. But he's got a lot to think about and work through right now, so it's understandable why he's so stressed out.
Poor Chihiro. He's coming to the conclusions that we, the readers privileged with having weeks IRL to ponder new information, came to long ago. The Master is not treated like a hero but a prisoner, and probably for very, very good reasons. Ones good enough to convince Samura to make a deal with the devil.
What Actually Happened?!
Not all the blades have themes from nature, it seems. Geisha offered many different types of entertainment to guests, from performing music to conversation to serving sake. So now we have the idea behind the name [Swaying Sake]!
First up to delay just a little longer: Kumeyuri power reveal! Seems to be based in some kind of performing arts aesthetic with the geisha that were conjured. Fitting for the guy who wears kabuki eye make-up right? ...And for the next bearer, who interrupted a kabuki performance to pick it up in a theater... I see you and your foreshadowing, Hokazono-sensei.
Fine. I'll admit it. The ending of the chapter makes it crystal clear that Hiruhiko is the new bearer contracted to Kumeyuri by having his origami butterflies come undone as he grasps the hilt in his teeth. Can't even hope it's another case of someone "borrowing" power like Kyora did with the Shinuchi of the bunch.
Magatsumi's the only blade that can be used by someone not contracted to it, hence the extra protections it needed.
So that means... yeah. Uruha's gone. Just like that.
There will be thousands of theories about what exactly happened to Uruha, why Samura made a deal with John, what the details of that deal were- we'll get the truth soon. I'm most interested in the reasoning that ties into Samura's sincere beliefs of killing being an evil act.
The burden of death weighs so heavily on him that he blinded himself in penance. But he's willing to let his own apprentice die -probably even kill him himself!- because of... what? What was so horrible about fighting with the Master and Kunishige's weapons for the good of the nation? What compelled him to help the Hishaku kill the remaining bearers and upend the peace they earned?!
Hey, Samura. Is it really so bad to be called a war hero while being treated like a prisoner in a comfortable government-provided jail facility? Is it so horrible that "alternative facts" pass for real history to bury whatever horrors you witnessed and possibly perpetrated? Is it truly awful to have people willing to die for you despite all the grave sins you've committed? That they're likely completely unaware of thanks to government propaganda and being too young to have witnessed the truth?
...I need those Seitei War flashbacks pronto.
*----------------------------------------------------------------------------*
Wait a minute. Jail? Even the friggin' onsen?
Yup! The Master's the only one being treated like a dangerous criminal outright, but the 慚箱 [sanso] are just dressed up prisons for the Bearers. The Kamunabi ain't even subtle about it.
慚 [san] - to feel shame 箱 [sou] - box
The government put these guys in specially-constructed (or repurposed) buildings officially referred to as "shame boxes" and told them they couldn't leave. Even the name given to one of them is a bit much! 国獄温泉 [Kokugoku Onsen] translates to:
国 [koku]- country/state/national government 獄 [goku]- jail/prison 温泉 [onsen] - hot spring
Gee, I wonder if Uruha was having a good time at State Prison Hot Springs?
That said, while there may well be some bitterness between the Bearers and the Kamunabi, it's not the main motivating factor for Samura. His is definitely rooted in how they all acted during the war and how guilty he feels now that they're promoted as heroes.
*----------------------------------------------------------------------------*
It looks like Chihiro's being summoned by Hakuri in the very last panel so we might get some perspective on Samura's reasoning next week. Probably no clear answers right away, but at least enough to see if he really was the one who killed Uruha and a bit of insight into why. And to see if Uruha's dead at all... I mean, if we don't see a body... let me be delusional, okay?!
I'm just not able to go all-in on believing Uruha's dead. But it's not because I don't think he actually is... it just doesn't feel real after spending weeks preparing to let go of Samura. Not to mention the tried-and-true tactic of baiting out strong emotions with implied character deaths.
Normally I don't take death foreshadowing like this too seriously in shounen series. I just wait to see if the author is faking me out or not before getting stressed (unless it's Hakuri, in which case I stress responsibly). But Kagurabachi is a series that lured the MC with a child's severed leg and showed two suicide attempts on-screen, one of which was horrifically successful- right in front of someone who was already traumatized too. Hell we lost most of the anti-Kuregumo squad without much fanfare back in the Sojo arc! Only actually showing a child being tortured on-screen is too much, apparently. This series is dark as hell when the author wants it to be and Uruha's death is probably another one of those times.
There's hope in me that Uruha can still come out of this alive just because I like him so much, but I want the author to follow through on his death when it's presented as such an ominously real scenario. All signs point to Uruha being a goner, so don't make it look iron-clad then say "nah" the next chapter with some technicality that we couldn't have known about until the reveal. I would rather lose Uruha in an unexpectedly painful way than be faked out just to get the reaction out of me, y'know? Don't toy with me. Commit to crushing my heart, dammit.
But, God... oh man. I fell for the bait and got stupidly attached to a Bearer in the arc named after killing them. I even knew bad times were coming because of all the levity at the start of the arc but still went on hoping nothing would happen so soon. Laugh at me, I deserve it. I probably helped this manifest by mentioning how awful it would be if Chihiro found out a Bearer died because Hiruhiko was able to contract with one of the blades. Saying "I crave the angst that will come from this situation with every fiber of my being" in a post tag was overkill. It's just:
Author: names the arc after assassinating the bearers
Reader: gets attached anyway
Author: assassinates a bearer
Reader: ╚(•⌂•)╝
Coping Theory
May as well put my two cents in on how it could have gone down while I'm here...
I wonder if he planned to die in the raid instead so it looked like an unavoidable accident, sparing everyone else from the carnage.
This exact sequence- the Makizumi talking about honor in death for saving Samura, and Uruha's words that the Bearer's lives need to be valued above others'- is what solidifies Samura's resolve. This man is filled to the brim with guilt and self-loathing (much like another swordsman we know). He cannot save himself, but... perhaps he can take some equally bad sinners down with him for the greater good. He's not only a mirror for Hakuri, but Chihiro as well- one's resolve to save no matter the cost to one's self, and one's resolve to go to hell for what they believe is right. That's how I'm reading this until we get his own insight on the matter, at least.
It's not a stretch to infer that Samura thinks the Bearers are better off dead in large part due to the powers they command and things that were done during the war. That's still a huge mystery to be unraveled but I mean:
Seeing the bare minimum of Magatsumi in action really drives home how horrific these "heroes" could seem out on the battle field doesn't it? No wonder the clone sorcerer described the Seitei war as "hell on earth". But the public has no knowledge of this. They only got the sanitized version fit for PR purposes and feel-good stories.
The Hishaku seem to be intent on dismantling this image. Perhaps that's how they got Samura on their side? Not sure how the current Bearers dying and giving the Hishaku access to that dreadful power is better than the status quo, but that's something that will become clear with more reveals about the ideology driving the group. Maybe Samura doesn't care so much about the rest of the world and just wants to do what's best for the truth that's been buried under nearly two decade's worth of secrecy.
As to what happened with Uruha... two things come to mind. One I think is more likely, and one I want to cling to until it's ripped away as I sob and beg for just one little bit of comfort.
Most likely, I think Samura and Uruha had an exchange about ideals and the value of their lives. Samura overpowered Uruha per the plan as the "trump card" and that was that.
In delulu land, I want Samura to have been double-crossed. As in he made a deal on the condition that the lives of the people he cared about would be spared, but of course Uruha couldn't be allowed to live. So the Hishaku ensured that he'd die there no matter what. It's a bunk theory since Mr. Hatshaku left once the situation turned against him... maybe incorporate some of the datenseki mind control stuff in there somehow? I don't know. Just let me have this until canon proves otherwise.
Hakuri and Chihiro, Though?! And Miscellaneous Questions
(Ch. 46) I'm not going to be okay for a while and neither are they.
Best boys are really gonna go through it no matter what Chihiro is summoned back to. They'll be in a rough way... not only did they lose Uruha and hand Kumeyuri to Hiruhiko, but Samura betrayed them all... oof. So much for proving themselves to the Kamunabi. They're going to get an earful and be set back in the "negotiations" big time.
No doubt Chihiro will put this burden on his shoulders too, even if no one could have predicted Samura's defection to the enemy. It's his dad's legacy that's causing all this strife right now. He'll be more motivated than ever to unravel the war's true history and I'll be right there with him hoping he doesn't push himself too hard or harshly. The son shouldn't be responsible for the sins his father committed before he was even born. But that's just like, my opinion, man.
Meanwhile...
"I'm still good for it," wheezes the guy with blood gushing out of his nose at an alarming rate.
Hakuri will probably blame himself too. Depending on how things shake out, it could be for anything from accidentally arming a traitor to seeing someone die in front of him again. There's a good chance he'll (temporarily) lose the thing that makes him useful too, so that'll be an extra layer of angst for him to deal with. What value does a broken tool that couldn't fulfill it's one purpose have?
I also wonder what prompted Hakuri to summon Chihiro away from Hiruhiko. He's kind of in rough shape to do it just 'cause he misses his (boy)friend. They have cell phones to communicate with so it seems a bit abrupt to summon him back without checking first. Hakuri's also not the type to impose on someone to protect him. Nor is he the type to drop Chihiro into the middle of a life-or-death situation without a sense of mutual understanding first. So there had to be some kind of pressing need. The timeline of events means he's summoning Chihiro right after Uruha was killed, so... more soulmate stuff maybe? Their souls call out to each other and resonate when they're in distress, after all (it's canon baybeeeeee). They're in perfect harmony and all that. Sorry for the shipping nonsense I just need any bit of fluff I can get right now.
So many questions that might not get answered...
What about the Makizumi? Will they defect to serve Samura? Or will they try to help get Hakuri to safety with the Kamunabi? Samura doesn't want to kill them at all so no matter what happens they'll live at least. Hooray an elite squad that didn't bite the dust... (I think they will choose Samura because of everything he did for them).
How did Hiruhiko know when Kumeyuri was usable anyway?! Was it some signal from his mystery supporter that was lurking outside the window? And who was that- did Worst Jeanist show up?
Samura's loath to kill innocents, but does Hakuri count as one? Would losing his sorcery be enough to count him as neutralized for the Hishaku's purposes? Was exhausting Hakuri the main reason why Hiruhiko sent all the forces to the temple in the first place?
Hiruhiko wasn't surprised to see Tobimune disappear, so the Hishaku probably know about Hakuri's power. Their mole within the Kamunabi should get a bonus for the turnaround time on learning that bit of info and sending it on. Unless John's playing 5D chess and knew about Hakuri's awakening and team-up with Chihiro before they even met the Kamunabi anyway... perhaps even orchestrated it too... that would definitely need a very good explanation.
Alright. Okay. Let's wait on tenterhooks together, dear void. No waterworks until they show the body, got it?
[sob]
#kagurabachi#long post#More convinced than ever that the Seitei War was a civil war#Saving the Hakuri Development Arc prospects yap for another chapter or two to see exactly how all this plays out#But I think he'll be finding his own path between Samura Uruha and his family's just like Chihiro#Uruha... not like this...
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Heya!! Can I request a tcf x reader fic from where the reader is teenager and got teleported there? Somehow they can see the dreams of the future and knew about tcf novel while also being a full on simp for the main characters?(But also the thing that the young reader was someone who has been to various worlds and was in a loop, repeating things but without the memory of them doing so each time. They get glimpses ofcourse but it was just their past self trying to give out signals to not repeat any mistakes)
Definitions - Cale & Teen! Reader
notes: sorry anon i couldn't reflect all of your ideas because i found some of them hard to combine when i started writing. also this plot is better suited for a long fic/series but i don't have that time and energy huhu
tags: gender-neutral reader, mentions of death and dying (can be a little graphic but nothing too bad), teenager reader, nightmares
English isn’t my first language so there will be grammatical errors
Pls don't repost my work anywhere without my permission
Constructive criticisms and any kind of interaction are more than welcome
Requests are open and welcome (for a limited time)
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“You should be more careful, this is uncharted territory.”
The look-a-like caressed your face softly as they spoke. Eyes filled with concern and uncertainty bore into you.
You may look alike but there’s something different about them.
Maybe it’s their mature aura. Perhaps it could be the tired look in their eyes. As though they have been suffering for eternity and want everything to end.
Whether they long for peace or eternal rest even you do not know.
“Still… this is a good opportunity and something we haven’t tried yet. Maybe you’ll be safer under his watch.”
“What do you mean by that? Who are you?”
You spoke for the first time since being transported in this weird abyss.
Being transmigrated into a novel like a lousy isekai protagonist was already confusing, but now you have to add weird dreams on top of that.
However, it beats trying to survive in that place you used to call home.
Between being endlessly confused and going back there… you’d choose the former any time of the day.
“I am you, well a part of you at least. As for what I mean… let’s just say this is for your own good.”
The supposed “you” paused briefly as they rested their hand on their chin. Probably thinking about how much they can disclose. Once they made up their mind their fingers caressed your head.
You may not know what’s happening, but you can tell they’re trying to provide comfort.
And it’s probably for the arduous path waiting beyond this dream.
“We’ve been through this many times, and each time you forget… I do not know if god has forsaken us or is playing a cruel joke…”
The look-a-like sighed before hugging you tightly. You meant to reciprocate, however, before you could raise your arms a sharp pain went through your neck.
“AGH! IT HURTS!”
It really does. It feels as though someone’s digging a knife through your neck, Trying to separate your head from your body.
When you manage to come back to your senses the other you are gone. The only thing left in the abyss is your and your throbbing neck.
…And wouldn’t you know, the moment you looked at your hands that were previously clutching your neck… all you could see was blood.
“-[me]”
“-[me]!”
“[Name]!”
“[Name] wake up!”
You jolt up as the familiar voice wakes you up from your dream. That’s right, you are currently under Cale Henituse’s wing after being transmigrated inside the novel you were reading. You have momentarily forgotten such a fact.
Clutching your throbbing neck, you tried to look at the redhead through your tears. Not that you are succeeding at the moment. However, you think you could see a slightly startled look on the young master’s usually calm face.
“Young master..?”
You asked, unsure of everything as your mind is still hazy. Still trying to get out of dreamland.
“You were screaming and crying in your sleep.”
Cale stated calmly as if he wasn’t panicking a minute ago. Still, his eyes roamed around you several times to double-check if there was anything wrong.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
The redhead asks as he gently wipes your tears and pry your hands away from your neck.
“I’m sorry young master. I don’t think I can for I don’t remember the contents of my dream… All I could remember was that there was a searing pain in my neck. It-it felt so real. As though I was in the middle of the battlefield and someone was sawing their sword back-and-forth on my neck…”
You tried to explain to the best of your abilities. You didn’t want to lie to the man that you considered your saviour.
Both when you were reading the novel and when you transmigrated.
In every form, fictional character or not, Cale Henituse has always been your saviour in one way or another. And thus you hold deep respect for the man.
“Don’t push yourself. Sometimes forgetting and never remembering is better than being reminded constantly.”
Ah, he must be referring to his record ability. A blessing and a curse indeed…
“Still, if you feel unwell or anything come to me. I took a kid like you in so I must take responsibility for you till the very end.”
Cale Henituse probably doesn’t know the impact of his words. Just how much you have longed to hear such things.
No, perhaps he does. Perhaps more than anyone, Kim Rok Soo has been the one longing to hear those words since he was a child.
“I’ll keep that in mind…”
With that, Cale stepped out for a moment to ask a servant to fetch a glass of warm milk. After doing so he returned to your side, sitting on the side of your bed. He looks unwilling to leave you, despite having three younger children waiting for him in his bedroom.
“Don’t hold back, have you seen me holding back from doing and saying whatever I want? You don’t have to push yourself to act like a grownup around me. I’m the adult, those things are for me to bear.”
Cale’s words suddenly found their way to your memory when you were about to urge him to go back to On, Hong, and Raon. That combined with the redhead’s determined gaze to not leave your side has you clamping your mouth shut.
Soon enough a maid delivered the glass of milk to your room and you drank it to your heart’s content. Then the morning after that you could feel the children averaging 7 years old sleeping beside you.
The weeks following that are peaceful. Well as peaceful as Cale’s life could get at least. Not that it says much since he has the tendency to meddle in things that will only jeopardize his slacker life.
Despite that, your days are looking better. After that night you didn’t seem to experience excruciating nightmares anymore. You also seemed to have opened up to the rest of the crew.
Perhaps that’s why Cale became complacent, causing him to lower his guard.
And perhaps that’s also why his face hardens 10x more than it would have weeks ago. His anger soars through the sky, reaching the gods even, as he hears the heartbroken sobs you utter on your lips after waking up from a nightmare.
“Am I such a bad child for the gods to do this to me? Have they forsaken me? What did I do that was so wrong that warrants this kind of suffering?”
You sobbed on the young’s master chest. You look so out of it. Eyes glazed over as if you’re not with Cale despite being in his embrace. You continued to wail, continued to curse the world for putting you in a type of pain that not even Cale can comprehend.
“I’m tired, I’m so tired. How many times has it been? I’ve tried my best… I always did, but I don’t know what the gods want.”
As you looked up at the ceiling, perhaps trying to directly ask the gods, Cale could finally clearly see your eyes.
They were filled with pain and suffering. Such young eyes carry the weight of the world.
It did not belong to the teen who was laughing and playing around with the kids and Choi Han.
It was still you, but it wasn’t the you that Cale is currently raising.
The meddlesome transmigrator couldn’t understand it himself, but he was sure of this feeling that he had about you.
Hence why when you finally passed out he immediately ordered someone to summon Cage and Saint Jack.
Cale Henituse might be a piece of trash but he always sees through his promises.
Even if he has to fight every god out there to fulfil it.
Because for Cale Henituse, that’s what it means to be a guardian.
#le asks#trash of the count's family#lout of the count’s family#tcf#lcf#cale henituse#lotcf#totcf#lcf x read#tcf x reader#tcf fic#lcf fic#x gn reader#x gender neutral reader#x child reader
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My thoughts on Dragon Age: The Veilguard
So, I finished datv yesterday and now have time to sit and think about it. Now, obviously this is just my subjective opinion, so take it with a grain of salt. I am going to start with the good and go into the bad and then finish with more good (that teacher training coming in). Also, I learned how to do a read more for this.
I am going to start with the combat. I have made another post about this, but that was like 3 hours into my first playthrough. Veilguard has the best combat in the series. Usually Dragon Age games have combat that is a slog to get through, so much so that many people in the fandom say they don't play the games for combat but for the story. I have never been a fan of the real-time with tactical pause, I find it a little boring. I am not a big fan of turn-based, to begin with ( that is one of the reasons I still have not finished Baulder's Gate). In the past, if I wanted to play a good story game with fun combat, I would play Mass Effect. But I have fun just fighting enemies, if DAI's combat was this fun I would replay it more often.
Next the art direction. Now, I am no artist and I know next to nothing about anything. But I really like the art. I think the environments are beautiful. I like the character models. I know people were complaining about the models having small heads in the lead-up to the release, but I think it was because the game doesn't use heroic proportions. And you don't notice in-game at all, at least I didn't. Also the brought back some reused assets from the Inquisition, and some of the paintings that have been around since Origins.
Okay the companions. I might write a longer post for each companion later on. I am going in alphabetical order.
Bellara: I romanced her, and I love her so much. She has some strong Tali vibes with a strong dose of ADHD. I am a little sad that we did not even kiss until after the final battle, but I just read that as her being ace or demi (like me!).
Davrin: He is such a bro. I love him and Assan so much. His banter with Emmrich is so funny. The ending to his story line is a little weak, but I will talk about that in his own post.
Emmrich: I think Emmrich is one of the best companions in the whole series, flat out. I love this man, he going to be my next romance (Female Qunari Grey Warden).
Harding: Harding is great. I really liked all of the Titan stuff in her storyline. I did get her killed, so I am not sure what her ending is like. I did think her romance with Taash was cute.
Lucanis: I'm going to say it. I think Lucanis is the weakest of the companions, I don't dislike him. I don't if I missed a lot of content because I saved Minrathous instead of Treviso or if it was because his writer got canned during development. And what he did have felt bare bones. I thought we would be dealing with Spite a lot more. I will say his recruitment mission is a blast.
Neve: I played a Shadow Dragon so my character had a lot of in common with Neve. I like her, but I don't have any strong feelings towards her one or another. Her romance with Lucanis is a thing that happens. I might change my mind when I get around to romancing her.
Taash: I am cis, so take this with a grain of salt. But I think their storyline about being non-binary was oddly paced. I did like everything past that, I think it was much better paced. I do like them a lot. Also, they are really cute with Harding. I do wish there was more of a reaction to me getting Harding killed on Tearstone Island, but that is a writing complaint.
Speaking of the writing. It is really a mixed bag. Some of it is great and then some of it was giving slop comics from the mid-00s. The first several hours are story slog, some of that is because of all the lore dumps, and some of it is because it is oddly paced. The writing gets progressively better throughout the game. From the point of no return to the credits it is the strongest writing, maybe not in the whole series but definitely since the last third of DAI. That after-credit scene was a choice. I will probably talk about that more after I figure out how I feel about it. I think Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nan are the strongest villains since Loghain, it really helps that they are present throughout the game. There are definitely moments where you feel that Rook is HR, but not a lot, but enough that I understand why that made it into some reviews. I don't think it is any more quippy or Marvel-like than any other Dragon Age game, "Swooping is bad" comes to mind.
Finally, some random thoughts. I think this game really nailed the horror of the Blight, I can't get the image of Bellara wrapped in Blight tentacles during the final section out of my head.
I played a non-mage elf shadow dragon, and there was a lot of reactivity for the shadow dragon part, less the elf part. I know I missed a conversation with Tarquin about it, but still. It's like no one even noticed the pointy ears.
That's it for now. I might add more as think about it.
8/10, I had a blast.
#dragon age veilguard#dragon age the veilguard#datv spoilers#bellara#lucanis dellamorte#emmrich volkarin#taash#neve gallus#lace harding
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when a hobby starts to feel like work, and not something you enjoy doing, remember to take a step back
#i've seen posts lately about people who seem to suffer from writing :( and#girl gn#remember why you started writing#it should be fun#you shouldn't feel like you have to meet a weekly word count. it's not a job. you're not going to get fired#nothing bad is going to happen if you don't write#give yourself some time and remember how much you love doing it. do it for you 🙂↕️💗
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Holding out hope that the writing in veilguard will get more bearable but rook saying to lucanis that it's "not nice that Spite hurt him" and he "shouldn't accept that it’s fine bc it wouldn't be ok if a person did that" like. That is a demon. Built off a single emotion called SPITE. Rook I am finding it really hard to believe that u have lived in thedas for more than 30 seconds.
#wow the demons which are one of the consistently evil forces in these games did something bad#hey players do you know that that was not nice#ok thank you. do u think I am 4#dav spoilers#veilguard spoilers#dragon age the veilguard#also grinding my gears that everyone (including dalish elves???) just immediately accept the evanuris are evil/have come back#like the first person to not immediately believe it is the first warden and honestly he is the only character so far I respect#like maybe if this was like inquisition and a huge hole in the sky/rifts opened everywhere#but it seems like nothing like that happened but everyone somehow magically knows about the ritual and instantly believes everything rook sa#the more I think about these things the more annoyed I get#guys did you know being a leader means u sometimes need to make hard decisions... varric taught me that in my ma15+ game#i am enjoying the combat at least lol and I like Bellara and want to see Babylon so I'm in it for the long haul#why does everyone have a gun to their head making them nice though like it's so painfully out of place sometimes#and being able to only say the same thing but in a slightly boring slightly funny or slightly serious way is driving me insane#like I seem to be the only one who had no problem w the limits on dialogue in inquisition but this is driving me insane#Mourn watch rook what if you were somehow boring and nice. yay thank you bioware#ALSO rook stop talking and forming opinions without me getting to choose what u say like no I don't want u to day we have to save that perso#ok I swear I'm done now.. I need to go back to writing my thesis instead of grinding my teeth about this game#this is all coming from an inquisition enjoyer as well (sorry) but like so far I have found nothing I enjoyed about inquisition in this game#maybe if the inquisitor and Ghilan'nain are cool latee on I can focus on that (big maybe)#I am only early on still (just met first warden) so there is still time... i guess..
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Belobog was my fave main quest but a lot of it is so. Contradictory. It's like they had multiple groups doing different shit and none of them checked in with each other for consistency. And you see this so much in Gepard's profile.
So in the main quest, they made him unfailingly, unquestionably loyal to Cocolia. Gepard's character arc is him learning to question authority etc etc. And this isn't even a bad thing; that's a story worth telling! It makes good conflict between him and Serval! And I love that we got Gepard as a boss battle and I get to see him all the time in SU!
But then you look at his character stories and it's like. The complete opposite.
According to his profile, Gepard has already HAD this awakening, long before the Astral Express, and he'd already decided Cocolia sucks. Even outside of his stories, there's a pretty damning readable between him and Pela.
He even disobeyed direct orders right in front of her- he has been disobeying orders for a while now!
So I've decided I'm marrying the two different sides of this into a 1.5k fic-ish thingy, because I think there's some fun potential there with Gepard not trusting Cocolia, but still having to pretend to be a good obedient little soldier.
Anyway. I love to think of it as like. Gepard knows Cocolia has sunk into her apathy. He can see it in her eyes every time he looks at her. She doesn't care. Not about him, not about Pela, not about all his soldiers on the frontlines giving their lives to protect the citizens. And that's... It makes him bristle a bit, but ok. Gepard can deal with this. Even if Cocolia no longer cares, as long as she does her job then it's fine. Having compassion behind an action doesn't matter as much as the action itself. If Cocolia's heart is no longer swayed, then he'll just have to care twice as hard to pick up the slack. He considers it part of his duty as a captain of the guard anyway. It's fine. Gepard can deal with it.
And then, Cocolia starts coming down to the restricted zone. Issuing direct orders.
And Gepard realizes he is in way over his head.
Because Cocolia orders him to stay back and issue commands from the ramparts, away from all his comrades, away from where he can protect them.
Gepard had thought nothing could be as bad as watching a fellow guard die right next to him. But the first time he watches someone struck by a killing blow, so far away, it hurts. Every defensive scar across his arms itches, his fingers curl in want of a weapon, the cold cannot numb his hands enough as they desperately ache for his shield. It hurts.
Gepard tries to find any reason to stay. Because surely... He knows Cocolia has lost her love for her people, but surely... She wouldn't...
One day, Cocolia orders for their gunners to advance 20 yards. There are no survivors. She almost looks like she smiles.
Gepard doesn't sleep that night.
Pela brings him the report at the end of the first month; and then the month after that, and the month after that. A significant uptick in losses, and all of it started on that first day Cocolia started overriding his authority and issuing her own orders. The ends of Gepard's pens have all been nearly chewed off. Pela outright calls Cocolia an idiot, and Gepard corrects her. Cocolia isn't an idiot. Gepard had known her through Serval, knew her through all her college years and then some, and he knows how intelligent she is. It's not that she's stupid, and it's not that she's inexperienced, it's nothing of the sort.
Cocolia knows exactly what she's doing.
She must, there's no way she could make such a horrible mess of things so badly by accident. And Pela, quick as a whip, sharp as a tack, always too smart for her own good, catches onto the meaning behind Gepard's correction without any further prompting. The tent goes deathly quiet, nothing but the wind howling outside.
"...She's trying to kill us," Pela whispers, her voice swiftly suffocated by the silence.
Gepard swallows. He can't bring himself to correct her this time. There is nothing he could say that he would actually mean.
His gaze drops, back down to his desk and the reports on it. The names aren't listed, just the numbers, but Gepard knows them, knew them, and there must be something wrong, something he's missing, because why, why would she-? What could this possibly accomplish-?
“Gepard! Focus!” Something snaps right under his nose, and Gepard startles, eyes instantly honing in on Pela's irritated face as she leans over his desk. She holds his gaze for a moment before she huffs and begins to pace, wedges a knuckle between her teeth and bites like Gepard hasn't seen her do since cadet school.
Pela angrily strides from one end of his tent to the other, words hissed between her grit teeth. “What are we going to do?” In the dim lighting, Gepard can just barely see the damp spot of blood weeping under her gloves. “We need a plan.”
“A plan?”
“Wh- Yes, a plan! Unless you want more people to die!” Pela rounds on him then, all the wrath of a blizzard, winds roaring and snow sharp enough to cut.
“We don't even know-”
“What does it matter?! She killed-!!” Pela cuts off with a garbled noise when Gepard leaps up from his desk, hastily shoves his hand over her mouth. The prosthetic, not the flesh one, because he knows better than to assume Pela won't seize the opportunity to leave teeth marks in his skin.
“You're right. I'm sorry, I'm sorry; you're right. But you need to keep quiet.” Pela quirks an eyebrow at him and Gepard can read the question in her face. “Because we both saw what she did to Serval,” he hisses.
It's amazing the snow plains haven't thawed out yet, the amount of heat Pela can put behind a glare. The mere mention of Serval, and the smoking ruins Cocolia had made of her life and career, have her bristling up like a riled cat. The sudden hot breath she takes fans fog across his metal skin, and Gepard wisely keeps it in place until Pela finally sighs and reaches up, taps her fingertips against the back of his hand.
The second she's free, Pela bats him away and then her knuckle is right back between her teeth again, Gepard leaning back against his desk with his arms crossed to watch her resume her pacing. “If we spread the word, she'll have us discharged and make sure we can't even touch the frontlines,” Pela's voice seethes like an open sore. Gepard nods but keeps his silence. He knows better than to get in her way.
“And if you and I are both out of the picture, Belobog is fucked.” A little harsher than how he would have put it, but there's no denying that they're both important to the city's survival. Pela has the restricted zone running as efficiently as ever, and Gepard had become the youngest captain on record for a reason. “We need to keep this tight under wraps, at least for now… It can't leak to anyone higher up the chain.” Another nod. “Serval might know other discontents…” Another n-
Gepard's head snaps up. “No.”
“No what?”
“No. We're not involving Serval in this.”
Somehow, even the same tone that leaves entire squadrons shaking in their boots has never worked on her. “You're not deciding that for her, Gepard.”
Pela hadn't seen the worst of it, though, back when his sister had just been banned from the Architects. Serval's pride hadn't allowed it. Pela wasn't the one to find her passed out bottle still in hand, hadn't been the one to wash the sick out of her hair or carry her to bed.
Serval still has trouble thinking clearly when it comes to Cocolia, still can't quite bring herself to be objective. And Gepard maybe doesn't want her to be purely objective- but he would worry a lot less if she thought twice before she acted more often.
“At least let me be the one to bring it up to her.”
“Whatever, fine,” Pela gestures affirmatively at him as she paces past, and Gepard sighs. Good, at least that's one thing he can help.
From there, it's a lot of hemming and hawing and frustration. Cocolia has them under her boot, and Gepard and Pela both know it. Even with the way she's been cracking down on freedoms lately, Cocolia is still, overall, liked by the people. It's unlikely anyone would believe them. They don't even have solid proof, because most people don't know Cocolia as well as they do and won't see the clues in the same light.
The Fragmentum has been ramping up in recent years, too. Everyone is struggling just to survive as is, they can't afford a fight on two fronts. Gepard is a damn good captain, one of the best for that matter. But they're at a massive disadvantage, his experience is narrowed to fighting a defensive battle against monsters, that's all he's ever done. That's all anyone there has ever done. He has no way of finding first-hand knowledge for taking the offensive against a human opponent, and if he goes at this blind, there's no way he'll get everyone out unscathed. He's going to lose people. He's going to lose a lot of people.
He'd never thought before that Cocolia would have it in her to have someone killed. And with this new knowledge, he has no guarantee she won't go after Serval or Lynx if she decides to retaliate.
Gepard has to remind himself to breathe when he realizes this.
Pela writes down every name the two of them can come up with. Lists and lists of names and groups and anyone they can think of who might be an ally in all of this. They memorize every bit of it, make their plans of who to talk to and when. Gepard watches the sparks reflect off Pela's glasses as they burn the evidence together.
Pela finally leaves, far too late to make it home, but says she wants to stay in the restricted zone anyway to investigate. Gepard watches her make her way in the direction of Dunn's tent, watches her back until she's out of his sight and squashes down the urge to follow and keep an eye on her. His tent feels empty.
In the morning, Gepard is up before the wake up bells. He drags himself out of bed, leads his soldiers through their morning training. The same people gravitate to each other everyday. Friend groups and training partners. There's an ongoing rivalry between a few squadrons that everyone bets on. Some of them have lockets around their necks, keepsakes, mementos. Some of them wear wedding rings.
Gepard is suddenly, painfully aware of something acidic clawing at the inside of his throat, of a heavy weight low in his chest that blooms, takes up room until it threatens to spread his ribs. His mouth tastes of bile and blood.
He rearranges the schedules. Puts himself down for every open patrol into the Fragmentum, makes sure he'll be on the frontlines every single time Cocolia visits.
He only hopes that it's enough.
#honkai star rail#gepard landau#hsr gepard#pelageya sergeyevna#hsr pela#hsr#smacking Gepard out of Hoyo's hands and running off with him skzjmdkd#tentatively Figuring Out how to write these two... It feels a little tricky starting out with extreme circumstances like this haha#I feel like a lot of people see Gepard as naive for trusting Cocolia so much but I don't think that's quite it. He's not stupid.#He's not even naive.#He's someone who has been groomed since birth by his own parents to be an obedient Guard and nothing outside of that role.#You are not immune to propaganda etc etc#But even then there are a lot of things like all the included screenshots where he. Doesn't actually seem to like/trust Cocolia much.#I think Serval was a really good influence on him as a kid. He might have turned out much much worse without her.#and even with how I've written him here. I don't think he's normally slow to act or one to stand aside and make other people lead.#it's just that this specifically was a pretty extreme circumstance for him.#and also he openly states elsewhere that Pela is overbearing and he tries not to interfere with her work whenever possible nskzhdjdjd#Pela too. I don't know that I normally see her as someone with a bad temper or quick to anger.#But again; extreme circumstances haha#Bc like. they both would have seen what happened to Serval when she stood up to Cocolia. they know damn well what's going to happen to them.#if they fuck this up and get caught then they're done.#and I mean. What are they supposed to do? they're two people against the highest authority of the entire nation.#regardless I do love Gepard agonizing over this in the future after Bronya takes over and everything has settled down#did he do the right thing? did he make the right choice? if he went vigilante how many soldiers would have died without his protection?#would Belobog have fallen completely? how many people died because he DIDN'T run away? was it actually enough?#I love characters forced between a rock and a hard place. no good options. pick your poison.#no winning- only weighing what you can and cannot bear to lose.#make your choice and decide whether you want to rot or to burn.
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tag the oc that's most likely to get stuck in a time loop and what kind of time loop it would be
#I feel like Kyana has time loop potential but idk what the exact loop would be#maybe the loop is the entirety of DAO and she keeps getting companions killed/locked into their Bad Endings#and the loop only stops when she manages to get them all to survive the Blight#something something she needs to learn to be a good leader and care about others#unsuccessful loops reset via the archdemon killing her (even if the dark ritual was performed)#Selene gets the classic 'your love interest keeps dying and you try to stop it' time loop#to escape the loop she must Let It Happen (and then it turns out it's fine and everyone survives)#Secret gives me the vibe of someone who knows they're in a time loop but has given up on trying to solve it#she's just going through it. trying everything. keeping herself entertained. trying to stay sane#sometimes she clues Varric in on the looping. sometimes she doesn't#actually maybe her time loop rule is that someone else has to save her from it. nothing she does by herself will work#idk what the exact reset point would be#I'm thinking the Arishok fight maybe. or Meredith#I don't think it would go as far as the Fade#also. after writing Homecoming I did have the thought of a time loop story#with Dorian as the one being trapped and trying to prevent Neil from dying/becoming possessed#maybe in his case he's not really trapped. he can stop anytime he wants but he keeps choosing to go back#the reset point is something Solas-related maybe#herearedragons meta#oc: kyana amell#oc: watcher selene#oc: secret hawke#oc: neilar lavellan#oh. actually. Aqun would be pretty fun to put in a time loop#that runs over some part of DAI and/or Trespasser#Adina is his time loop buddy (the person he usually tells about the loop because she immediately believes him)#idk what his reset/escape condition would be though#maybe in his case it's something purely mechanical#like there's no lesson to be learned it's just a magical anomaly he's trapped on#and on a meta level the 'lesson' is accepting that not everything has a Purpose or a Reason
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Random thought I had last night. Genuinely think they're both equally outlandish - which is just ridiculous in itself if you think about it.
#ngl i think him wearing a shirt might be the most shocking thing he could do#lifting weights? shoving his tongue on the homies' throats? absolutely normal 👍#a SHIRT?? a piece of garment covering his chest and tummy???? actual normal clothing???? no. absolutely not#but also. imagine he just says “hello” OMG i would flip#i'm not counting that small “thank you” on Wembley because those were exceptional circumstances#i mean a regular ritual were nothing bad happens. and he just decides to be verbal for once and go :::) hello 👋#dew yew loike that? fancy seein' you 'ere#i don't know why i'm giving him a cockney accent. i know he talks more southern and posh but that's just funny#IF he did talk with us. do you think he'd be all “i have throughly enjoyed this ritual. we shall gather once more in this land with haste”#or he'd go full “yo yeah that's chill dawg”#be all “would you look at iii that wanker. that's my mate right there”#lmao idk what i'm saying. if this has a million typos IGNORE IT cus i'm writing this before bed and queuing for the morning#sleep token
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Every day I am haunted by the fact JJK could be amazing but it will be just idk Bleach or something
#I've seen a lot of people complaining about the fact that it's impossible to fit the ending of every unfinished arc#in the five chapters that remain for the manga to end for good#And it all just... legitimises my fear and apprehension haha#And it's a pity! It's a pity! The dynamics were so good! And yet nothing! Sukuna was so good! And yet nothing!#It was so nice how he seemed to play with the idea of transcending human categories and values but even the values of curses so to speak#Well beyond everything. Well beyond positive/creative nihilism even! He was not like Mahito#I wonder if Mahito is more a negative nihilism with a funny edge or a positive nihilism. For now it seems positive#with how he seems to have said something like 'nothing matters so we can do whatever we want and create what matters'#But Sukuna transcends all that! It could have been interesting to see how that developed in a way that wasn't just childish edginess#But no. And then there's all the idea of curses and sorcerers not being all that different#and so not really entirely possible to say one side is good and the other bad#There was the idea of the very source of powers with fear and love playing a role here in such a juicy way#And then there's the entire thing happening with Gojo as a concept and the very concepts he plays with which I could eat like an apple#but also I would let those very concepts eat at my heart as a worm inside an apple#Full of holes and rotting inside out and yet delighting at the sweetness#It could all be so good! And yet! Most of the manga is a few sketched dynamics and concepts and a very long fight with Sukuna#promising half finished arcs#WHY it could have been so good. And I don't think criticism is a matter of 'fans being spoiled! Go write your story!' or something#It's not a matter of things not going as fans would want them to be. It's a matter of not writing well#or cohesively things established by the author themselves. And I think that's a fair criticism#If we are to take manga as an art‚ which I wholeheartedly support‚#then we can subject mangas to artistic or literary or whatever you want to call it analysis. There are works that are better constructed#than others‚ and there are works that have good ideas but poor execution. And it's always a pity#In the case of JJK it's truly breaking my heart and the comments I see around about these five last chapters are not helping xD#God it could be so good. So good. And I'm not talking about in specific to me‚ which yes that too given the topics‚#but just so good in general. It could be so good. It could have been so good#And yet it's starting to look more and more like any other shonen. It truly breaks my heart haha#I talk too much#Jujutsu Kaisen#I used Bleach because I think that's one of the mangas that has been the most a let down to the friends I have who like shonen
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