#note to my 16-year-old-self: you picked an excellent favourite band!!

[notajoinerofthings]

Und du hoffst: Weisheit mit Löffeln für alle Doch du denkst: Ein Löffel Pech und das Ganze 'ne Falle Und du weißt, was uns verbindet Jeder für sich, jeder für sich Bevor die letzte Hoffnung schwindet Ein Bengalo in der Nacht Bevor die Dunkelheit dich findet An und für sich jeder für sich Die Lichter Morsezeichen Den Horizont erreichen

[jiangwanyin]

hnsjsj for your own sake i tried not too ask anything too 'appropriately depressing' but- 1, 6, 13, 16, 17, 20?

hsnfjsd i don't actually mind but thank you all the same, the sentiment is much appreciated 💗🌸

6. what is something that you’ve always wanted to do but have never been able to do?

i'm not sure i'm interpreting this correctly and if it means what's something i want to but haven't had the opportunity to do or something i want to and have tried but am simply bad at? anyways if it's the former then archery hsndjs if it's the latter then committing to things. i'm not even that scattered and i do have a few things hobbies etc i'm faithful to but there are a billion other projects/activities i get excited about, start or sign up for classes for or whatever and then lose interest in and never get anywhere with :^| i've always admired people who yknow stick to something like a specific sport or art classes or theatre or whatever and just do it regularly for years and years i tend to last a month at most 😳

13. what can make you excessively angry?

honestly? anything from the smallest thing not going my way to being ignored or making a mistake can make me fly off the handle the only thing i have going for me is that a) i'm a people pleaser so if we aren't close i'll repress it and won't get too unpleasant in front of you b) i calm down as quickly as i get mad but i erh definitely have some anger management issues i'm working on–

on a bigger scale and a less personal note however it's definitely injustice as a whole and close mindedness and the people i care about being mistreated and in that case i won't keep my cool regardless of the people i'm around and will always stand up and fight for what i believe is right and that type of anger never really goes away i can get just as mad thinking about something that happened years and years ago as i would about something that happened just the previous day which is also something i need to unlearn because it's a huge waste of my time and energy hsxdjgds but at least it's justified?

16. what is a skill or talent you’ve completely lost or overlooked? why did that happen?

art unfortunately 😔 it was one of the most important parts of my life and my favourite hobby for the longest time but of course as always i expected myself to excel at it without putting the required effort into it and was shocked and surprised when the people with less natural talent but more patience and developed skill started overtaking me and i was still stuck at the level of a 13 year old so you know how it goes, for a while i tried to get better at it, failed to see any improvement after approximately four days and simply gave up and to this day every time i attempt to draw or paint anything i just have a breakdown over how shit it is but i'm too proud to admit that i need to practice and let go of my inane need to be perfect and take classes so until i figure out how do that and submit to the mortifying ordeal of being a beginner and learn how to not give up immediately even without instant gratification i'm just stuck in this endless cycle of oh i miss drawing why did i ever stop > art doesn't turn out the way i imagined it > right yeah that's why > i hate myself i'm a failure i'm never doing this again (repeat) asdgsjd

17. what was your favorite color as a child and what is your favorite color now?

mm i mean turquoise always has and always will be my favourite the same way i'll always say led zeppelin are my favourite band even if i haven't listened to them in ages or lotr my main fandom even though i haven't watched the movies or picked up the book for half a year etc etc some things just have a completely irreplaceable place in my heart but i tend to have these phases of getting fixated on different colours for like a year and currently it's dark purple and when i was a child it was probably pink or red?

20. tell me what you think others think about you.

i guess that depends on how well the people in question know me because i act very differently in different situations so it's probably either quiet, serious, smart, shy, cold, a bit snobby, gives good advice but ultimately too distant and weird to really connect with OR passionate, deeply caring but at the same time rather self absorbed, supportive, not particularly dependable because i have a tendency to disappear but a good friend for the most part, the serious and gives good advice is probably still true and definitely a lot warmer? alternatively if someone doesn't like my style they probably see me as pretentious, a bit fake since i always try and be the version of myself that's most suited for and most likely to be loved and admired in the given situation, selfish, pigheaded and terrible at accepting let alone asking for help and someone who cares too much about rules, doesn't know how to let loose and have fun which of course is all very true but most people tend to find me amazing regardless✨

send me ✨deep✨ asks