#not trying to start some LGBT war here just a shower thought if you would

[gioscott]

Sam doesn't have a gender after the cage (negative) because it's just a body he gets to use, right now anyways.

"Hello what are your pronouns?"

"Idk I'm just a body/ I try not to think about it anymore/ I forgot about that years before I forgot English"

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #212

“counting bodies like sheep to the rhythm of the war drums.”

Have you ever fired a gun? No. Have you ever tried archery? No. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep? A day or so. Do you have any scars? Whew, a lot. I scar easily tbh, though me being so so pale probably contributes to making them more noticeable. Are you a good judge of character? I don't really know. I think so, but then again I'm very very paranoid when meeting new people and look TOO deep into how I expect someone to be. Can you do any other accents other than your own? Just British. What is your favorite accent? British generally, but I find French sooo pretty with girls, then Scottish is cool. What is your most expensive piece of clothing? I have no clue. Probably my leather boots. Can you curl your tongue? Yes, surprisingly... I just tried and I can with the slight curve in my tongue ring. Most used phrased? Probably "what a mood" or something like that lmao. Most used word? Besides the words in most sentences, I'm sure it's probably "fuck." How long does it take for you to get ready? Am I taking a shower? Then just like... less than 20 minutes. Without a shower, it's like less than ten minutes. Do you suck or bite lollipops? Both. Can you name all 50 states of America? No. I'm a sad American. Have you ever started a rumor? No. How fast can you type? I took a test awhile back for a job application purpose and it's 72 or so wpm. How fast can you run? I can tell you NOT FAST without even trying. Color of your bedspread? Navy and black. Have you ever had a really bad haircut? I don't think so. What brand, color, and type is your favorite eyeliner? I don't have one. Do you wear eyeliner? If I ever wear makeup, that's the one thing I will wear. Was there ever a time in your life when you couldn’t cry? Yes, probably early 2017. I was so numb until I started to "feel" recovery. Even as I got better, I had a hard time crying. Last year was a pretty "I can't cry"-type time, too. What’s your favorite type of yogurt? Not a fan of yogurt. What are your favorite type of calendars? I don't have one? Do you have a full-length mirror? Yes. Do you have a piggy bank? No. Do you remember your locker combinations from high school? No. What’s your favorite DIY crafts YouTube channel? I don't watch DIY crafts. Would you rather sleep on the top bunk or bottom bunk? At my current age, bottom. What kind of popcorn is your favorite? Probably caramel corn. But buttery and salty is great too. Does your town have a big fountain in it? No. What is your town known for? Probably nothing. Do you know what you want to do for your next birthday? If yes, what is it? Hm. That's a long ways off, idk. All I know is it'd be great if Sara was here. And then there's the yearly urge to get a tattoo that day lmao. What is the last new thing you discovered that was really good? I think The Shining. Watched it for the first time and loved it. What would be the best surprise you could receive right now? Hey could I have money right now. Were there any subjects in school that were really easy for you? If so, what? English/Language Arts. Did you ever skip a grade or get held back a grade? No. What is the best hairstyle you’ve ever had? I love what I currently have. Do you think you look better with dyed hair or natural hair? Dyed hair. Do you think your look better with curly hair or straight hair? Straight. Do you have bangs? No. What’s your favorite rock band? I'd say Marilyn Manson. (I'm excluding metal, 'cuz that's a different story.) Who’s your favorite country singer? I don't mind Tim McGraw. Did you try the unicorn frappuccino, and if yes, were you a fan? I didn't. When you look at your baby pictures, do you recognize yourself? Actual baby pictures, usually no. Has your hair color changed since you were a toddler? Yes; I was born dirty blonde. Do you wear matching socks? Yeah. Do you decorate for Halloween? We don't really anymore. What is your favorite thing to do in the pool? Just swim around, relax. Have you ever taken a picture at the perfect moment? I think so. What color(s) eyeshadow do you wear the most? Only ever black. Do you see yourself as a sensitive person? I'm extremely sensitive. Do you still leave/receive voicemails? Yes. Are you a festive person? Do you enjoy holidays? I'm not very festive, no. The only holidays that really excite me are Halloween and Christmas. What is your favorite subject to learn about? Meerkats. You’re feeling down - do you listen to sad music or happy? Sad. It usually comforts me/makes me feel less alone. Even though I might cry. Is there a song or artist that you secretly enjoy, but don’t want to enjoy? I like a decent number of Blood On The Dancefloor songs. Has your parents' taste in music in any way affected what you like? Yes. When I started getting into rock naturally, I began listening to my mom's CDs, and that's when metal stole my heart. You’re looking for some new music - what’s your preferred way to discover? YouTube recommendations. Do you still own any CD’s/records/tapes? Mom has CDs. She may or may not have tapes from when my sisters and I were really young for memory's sake; we had a lot of kid ones, like Raffi. Do you ever hear a new song on TV that you like and find it? When I watched TV, yeah, rarely. Do you watch the news? No. What about the weather channel? No. What’s your favorite holiday movie? Maybe Hocus Pocus. How do you feel about adult cartoons? I don't have an opinion. Do you still watch shows that you grew up watching? No. What about movies that you grew up with? Yeah. Do you identify with any organized religion? No. If so - is it how you were raised, or have you found your own? I was raised Catholic, grew to simply a Christian, then left that behind a year or more ago. Have you ever protested or been on strike? Does not eating at Chick-fil-a count as some kind of "protest?" That place was hard to let go of, but nah man, I'm not supporting your business when your higher-ups contribute to anti-LGBT efforts and such. Is gun control necessary or no? Some degree of control absolutely is. Are you happy with the political state where you reside? HAHA no. Should abstinence or sex education be taught in schools? Education, but I do believe in heavily advising smart sexual decisions such as not just doing it with just anyone. Have you read the book 13 Reasons Why or watched the show? I read the book. Should shows like this be available to everyone or could it be a trigger? Fuck the show. Do you like animals? Of course. What is your absolute favorite food? Probably pizza. Do you have bad anxiety? If so, do you take any kind of medication for it? You don't know the half of it. I literally cried the first and last day of my last job because I couldn't find the gloves when I needed to. So yeah, I take meds, but I don't think either do very much, honestly. Who was the last person you felt you were wasting your time on? A former best friend. I cared when she didn't. One thing you’ve experienced that you thought you never would have? I never in a million years thought I was going to have a bad - traumatic - breakup when I was kid because I "knew who to pick." I was so sure. What was the last thing someone said to you that kept repeating over & over in your head? The guy who helped in basic training with me saying "well that was a waste of my time" when my co-worker told him what was going on with me. Literally, it won't get out of my head. If a random person were to look through the photos on your phone, is there anything you’d be embarrassed about? lmao I have Mark wallpapers stored, my friend. Don't find my collection. How often do you have late nights out? Never. Ever. Do you currently have any mixed feelings about someone? As far as friendships go, yes. If you could, would you work from home? Do you think that would make you more or less productive? No no no no no. I want a job to get OUT of my house. I know I'd be less productive, too. What were you like in middle school? Weird and probably annoying. If you could give one charity a million dollars, what charity would you donate money to? I'm not sure. I'd have to look more into ones with causes I'm passionate about. Most likely something about conservation. Would you ever be an organ donor? I am. Which do you think is harder: realizing you haven’t changed or realizing you have? The former. Is there something that you really need to do, but can’t seem to get motivated to do it? Plenty of things. Have you ever won some sort of prize or prize package from a contest? What did you win? Yeah, a few. I don't remember most; I only really remember the Silent Hill one I've mentioned before. What is something you’re surprised hasn’t been invented yet? A cure for cancer, I guess? I dunno. Most disturbing movie you have ever seen? Probably The Entity. Has a life goal or dream ever come true for you yet? If yes, what is it? If no, do you think you’ll achieve it? lol by golly do I wish. I don't fucking know if I'll achieve any. What one thing has always bothered you, but seems to bother no one else? I get legitimately bothered by people going in/out the wrong door. Do you still own a VCR and VHS tapes? No. What’s your favorite color gummy bear? I don't care. What is the sexiest part of the opposite sex’s body? Shoulder blades why do I love shoulder blades????? Where do you sing the most, in the car or the shower? I dunno. Ever hurt yourself playing Wii? Probably. Do you have freckles? Not on my face. I did as a kid though. Weird. How many languages can you say “Hello” in? Three. What’s the last video game you played? So not computer? I believe... The Legend of Spyro: Dawn of the Dragon? Or Shadow of the Colossus. I don't remember. Can you do the alphabet in sign language? No. Do you like your feet? I don't like feet to begin with, and I don't like mine. My feet are so dry and callused to HELL from when I used to walk all the time. I need to see a doctor to get rid of the worst ones on my toes honestly because they annoy the fuck out of me because ugly. Candles or incense? Incense. Reason behind the last time you laughed until you cried? I don't remember. Are you one who brags a lot? I don't have anything to brag about. Do you face your problems head on or do you run away from them? Depends on the problem, I guess... What is the latest you’ve stayed out before? I remember there was one night in particular with Jason where he dropped me off like... really late. Around 3 or later in the morning. I don't remember why I got home so late. Are you confrontational? AVOID! AT ALL!!!!!!!!!!!! COSTS! Do you stand your ground? Usually. Who do you know without a doubt cares about you? Mom, Sara, and Dad. Have you ever caught yourself talking in your sleep? For the past year and more, I've started sleep talking frequently... and yeah, I've woken up in the middle of doing it plenty of times. Did you do anything stupid/anything you regret today? I probably do something stupid every day. Little things like procrastinate on everything are certainties. Have you ever switched primary care doctors? Do not. Get me FUCKING started. On the doctor who kept me on a medication that resulted in gaining like 150 pounds and blaming it all on me. Yeah, I switched. If yes, what was the reason? lol see above. Do you ever sleep on your bedroom floor just for fun? God no. Sleeping on the floor is a last resort. Are you worried about your current financial situation? LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL Do you know anyone who’s had a stillbirth? Probably. Who was the last person you know (or that you know of) that died? Uhhh I'm not sure. Possibly the old lady Mom watched. Do you need a new phone? Desperately. Would you rather get a big tattoo or small tattoo? A big one. Do you identify as a supernatural being..i.e., unicorn, alien, goddess…? Uh no. What’s one thing you are tired of seeing or hearing about on Facebook? Guys I don't understand the "me and the boys" meme laskdfjalwier make it go away. What theme do you want for your wedding? Halloween-ish. What theme would you choose for a baby’s nursery? Idk. I don't want kids, so this isn't something I think about. What color would you paint a baby girl’s nursery? Pastel pink. Not for stereotypical reasons, my favorite color just happens to be pink and I think it's cute for a baby. Does your first crush know that he/she was your first crush? No. Which family member did you get your height from? Mom and I are pretty much the same height. Do you like your butt? NO I have a pancake ass. Who was the last friend of yours to have a baby, and what’s the baby’s name? An old high school friend recently had a baby named Jaspen. Are all of your friends having babies right now? I think most of my old friends have at least one kid by now. Do you know anyone who’s given birth to twins? Yes. Growing up, did you listen to country music? Yes, when my older sister started controlling the radio. Do you have a gazebo at your house? No. Where were you going the first time you rode a plane? Ohio or Michigan. Do you like tomatoes? Not really, no. The only time I ever have was fresh ones with bacon and light mayo on a sandwich. What’s your favorite brand of bottled water? Essentia. Do you have any ceramic animals in your house or outside? Why is there a small dolphin in the corner of our back yard?????? What annoys you more: slow talkers or slow walkers? Slow walkers. Have you ever been to a night club? No. If you had a warning label, what would yours say? Something about being prone to anxiety, I guess. Do you believe in reincarnation? No. Do you believe in horoscopes and zodiacs? Not in the slightest. What is your MBTI personality type? INFP Can your dog roll over on command, if you have a dog? No. Is the ocean or sky prettier? Sky. Are you androgynous? No. Do you like to kiss others’ foreheads or hands for platonic reasons? No. Well I kiss my niece's and nephew's cheeks when telling them bye, but they're the only ones. What is the youngest age you can remember back to? I have at least one memory from when I was two. Did you wear your hair in a ponytail today? It's too short for that. What job would you NEVER take, even as a last resort? Slaughterhouse worker was the first thing to come to mind. If you broke your computer, would you be able to fix it on your own? No. What was the shittiest hotel you’ve ever stayed at and why? I don't think I've stayed in a bad one... What was the first kind of alcohol you ever tasted? A daiquiri. Do you use any styling products on your hair? No. Do you have a favorite local band? Who are they? No. What’s the most confusing book you ever read? Even though it's my favorite book, Johnny Got His Gun takes the cake here. The way it's written is very confusing, though I think I get why Trumbo chose such a style. Do you like your personality? I like some things, hate others. Are your legs long or short? I'd say they're proportional to the rest of my body. How many phobias do you have? A lot. Where do you think your last ex is right now? He's probably sleeping since he works 3rd shift. What’s the most beautiful thing you’ve seen in the last week? I don't know. Probably the sky during a car ride or something. Who was the last person to comfort you as you cried? My mom. When was the last time you felt like throwing up? A week ago or so when I had an anxiety attack the night before my first day of work. I got myself so worked up. Have you ever had to wear a hairnet? For the two fucking hours I lasted at my last job lmao. Do you use the Facebook chat often? No. Do you own a robe? What color is it? Nope. Who ended your last relationship? Me. Do you still remember your first kiss? Yeah. Are you happy with where you are relationship-wise now? Yeah, other than being long-distance. How many kids do you want to have? None. Have you ever purposely given someone the wrong number? No. Who’s the last person you smoked weed with? I haven't. Though by this point in my life, I wish NC would catch up with the times and legalize it medicinally because I've given up enough to turn to that for my anxiety. Who was the last person you talked to, other than family? My old VR coach. When was the last time you flew in a plane? Last December. Is there a girl you absolutely can not stand? No. At least not off the top of my head. Ever had a person who was obsessed with you so much that it scared you? No, I was that person lmao. Has anyone ever mistaken you for someone else? Yes. Say your last ex walks up to you and hugs you, what do you say? We're still friends, so. At the current time, a random hug from him would probably make me cry though because he's not very affectionate and I haven't been stable for days. I need the comfort alsdjfakljwer Who was the last baby you held? It's probably been like a year since I've held a baby when I was still friends with Colleen. But y'all my sister is pregnant & next year GUESS WHO I'M HOLDING. Do you have any siblings that moved away to college? She did, but she's long since graduated. Who was the last person who cried around you? I'm sure it was Mom. What was the last thing you cried about? My life. Who’s the last guy to give you roses? Tyler. Would you rather have nice eyes or nice lips/smile? Smile, I suppose. Do you have a common first name? Yes. Do you like your middle name or your first name more? My first, I guess. Do you wear more rings or necklaces? I always have a ring on. Have you ever been engaged? No. Can you see your veins through your skin? In some areas. Did your parents let you have pets when you were a kid? Yes. Do you like spicy chips? Yes. What band was on the last band t-shirt you wore? Metallica. Do you have any tattoos on your arms? Yes. Have you ever owned or known someone who owned a black cat? Both. Who scheduled your last doctor visit? My mom. I don't drive, so she drives me around, and so things have to fit into her busy schedule. So she just does it. Do you have any holiday themed socks? True shit, I think most of mine are, lmao... Like you know, socks are a common gift on Christmas. What’s the last funny movie you watched? Idr. Can you remember your parents’ birthdays? Yes. What piercing do you like most on the opposite sex? I'd say it depends on the person, but in general, I suppose snakebites? What brand of hair dye do you prefer to use? Splat is the only brand that has ever stuck to my hair. Lasted months. Did/do you ride the bus to and from school? Only Jason's junior and senior years sometimes to go to his house. Are you any good at applying make up? No. I have tremors in my hands, and it makes it an absolute nightmare. Are you someone who likes to make simple things difficult? I certainly don't try to, but I somehow always end up doing it. What’s your favorite Thanksgiving food? Rolls and honey ham. And that is /literally/ it. I don't like Thanksgiving food. Do you like Techno music? Yeah. Is your second toe longer than your big toe? They're like the exact same length. Do you say "merry Christmas" or "happy holidays?" The former. Who do you talk to on the phone most often? Mom. What’s the best concert you’ve ever been to? I've only ever been to Alice Cooper, but it was great. I'm supposed to be seeing Ozzy plus supposedly Judas Priest and Megadeth (you're not allowed to die, Dave) next year, and that. That will be. My preview into Heaven. I will sob. How did you meet your best friend? Over YouTube via the meerkat RP community. Do you need money to be happy? Try living really poor and come back to me claiming money can't ever buy happiness. What is something you do well? Dig way, way too deep into absolutely anything and everything. What’s a good idea you’ve had recently? I've started to count calories on top of fasting. What is your favorite thing to eat for breakfast? Ahhhhh, cinnamon rolls. How far in advance do you prefer to plan? For most things, a few days or a week. Bigger things, maybe like a month+? How many slices of pizza do you usually eat? 2-3, depending on my appetite. Would you like to live in a different country? If so which one? I wouldn't move there, not with all my family and such here, but I think living in Canada would be better sometimes. Do you prefer the aisle, middle, or window seat on a plane? I strongly prefer the window seat; I've found that if I'm not looking out the window and the plane changes altitude or direction (takeoff is the worst), I get VERY dizzy. I usually always wind up in the middle seat, and there and in the aisle seat, I have to close my eyes at times like those. What’s your favorite song from a movie? As far as original songs, probably "Be Prepared" from The Lion King. A goddamn beat. What’s your favorite city? I haven't been to many. Idk. Who was the last person to ask you to hang out? Did you agree to hang out with them? Hell, I have no idea. Is there a food that you eat basically every day? What food is that? I usually have a granola bar as a snack or even just a meal in place of breakfast or lunch. Is there a food you eat that others find weird or gross? I grew up sometimes eating waffles with peanut butter and syrup as Dad loved it. It's definitely different, but it's absolutely delicious. What was the last fast food restaurant you went to? Did you get anything? If so, what? I think Sonic? I got a double bacon cheeseburger. I fell in love with their burgers. Can you remember the first video game you ever played? What about your first video gaming system? I'm not sure, but it was probably Spyro The Dragon. My first gaming system was a PS1. The last video game you played - did you play alone or with someone else? Alone. If there is a disc in your computer, what disc is it? There isn't one. Do you shut down your computer every time after you use it, or do you leave it on? I leave it on. Do you know anyone who has ever been in a movie? Who and what movie were they in? What was their part? No. Describe the last shirt you saw that you really liked. Where did you see it? Omg I saw this shirt online of a really cool demonic pig that said something like "Save the animals, eat humans." It was actually a vegan shirt, but I nevertheless wanted it, lol. I support veganism, but yeah... I could never do it. But anyway, it was too expensive. Do you live in a very diverse community? Not really, no. Do you know anyone who has had salmonella? Did you ever have it yourself? What about e-coli? No; no; no. When was the last time you brought a pet to the vet? What was wrong with it? Sigh. We put Cali down. Something ruptured in her abdomen and there was also a mass on her liver or gallbladder, and her abdomen was filling with blood. It compressed her lungs so much she could barely breathe. Surgery was extremely expensive, but more importantly, we were told it likely wouldn't save her. Do you get motion sick easily? If so, does it prevent you from going on any rides at amusement parks? I've never gotten motion sickness, but I don't risk that shit with amusement park rides or boats out at sea. I'm terrified of vomiting. Do you have any bug bites on you right now? If so, where? No. Have you ever made your way through a corn maze? No. Name something that you used to do with your family that you no longer do with them or at all? Easter egg painting. Have you seen Inception yet? Thoughts on that movie? I never saw it.

[artificialqueens]

Stonewall (Katlaska, Biadore): Chapter 1- Landfill

Author’s Note: So, as someone very involved in LGBT rights stuff in the UK, I’ve wanted to write something around this for a while, so I did. Set in 1968 onwards, this fic follows the lives of a collection of LGBT people living in New York in the lead up to the Stonewall Riots, finding love and finding themselves (I like cheesy stuff.) There will be twists… So I can’t give away all of the characters’ gender identities yet but it centres around Brian/Katya, Justin/Alaska, Danny/Adore, Roy/Bianca, Aaron/Sharon, Brian/Trixie and possibly others… Oh and Cory because why not? Not all are here from the beginning.

Brian always aimed to stay unnoticed when he was in school. Keep his head down, only speak when spoken to, hand in good enough grades to get by not not good enough to draw attention to himself. Unless he was in competitions of course, it’s hard for no one to spot you when you’re walking towards them on your hands and knees, belly to the ceiling, back in a sharp arch. But that was necessity, gymnastics was the only thing he’d decided he couldn’t just give up out of fear. It was the height of the Cold War, and being an oddly flexible, skinny Russian boy had already put him at risk of harm. If they found out his secret, or just generally how weird he could be when he got talking, he would be thoroughly screwed. Let me know if you enjoy it, and if not, where I can improve xxx

All that changed on the morning of October 28th 1968, when some force from above compelled him to step out of the shadows. The day started like any other Monday, showering, pulling on a shirt, tie and blazer, glancing in at his passed out father and then heading off to school. He walked, for several reasons. The first was that he liked to keep fit, the second was that on a sunny day, the New York streets could almost pass as beautiful (if you ignored the half dead junkies seeping between the cracks) and the third was that the school bus was the exact sort of place one could find themselves getting noticed in the kind of way that Brian completely did not want to get noticed.

His first and second classes of the day had gone as smoothly as he could have hoped, the hitch coming at class number three- History of Comedy (Literature) with Mr Haylock. He always enjoyed the lesson, it was one of the few he shared with his friend, Daniel Noriega. Danny, unfortunately, was not quite as good at keeping his head down as Brian was, his feminine voice and wavy hair never ceasing to get him in trouble. It also didn’t help his case that he seemed completely and utterly devoted to his Literature lessons, though of course Brian knew that this wasn’t the case. The two boys had been friends since they were 11, when Brian’s family both moved to the city. Danny’s mother, Bonnie, ran a daycare centre, and often would end up taking the leftover children home when nobody came for them at the end of the day, until somebody managed to get in touch with their parents. Since his father fulfilled the stereotype of Russians loving Vodka, Brian spent more than a few nights sharing a room with Bonnie’s son. When they were 15, they had found themselves in the same literature class, ran by the very same Roy Haylock that Brian found himself say in front of that Monday morning, and Danny was instantly transfixed. After a few months of Danny’s blushing and not meeting their new teacher’s eyes, Brian finally managed to get the truth out of him.

“Wait a second… Noriega… Are you telling me that you’re, you know… Gay?” Danny looked away from him, clearly afraid his friend was going to reveal his secret. In 1965, it was still considered mental illness to be homosexual, and the treatments were less than pleasant. In fact to be with another man was still considered criminal, and at this point both boys were still very afraid of the law. Not to mention the way he would be treated by the people around him. There was a reason the gay community in New York was so closely knit, and that was that they had all been rejected by everybody else. What Danny didn’t know was that very soon, he would find himself a part of that community, fighting for liberation with Brian right beside him. But that’s a story for another time. To 15 year old Danny’s surprise, Brian’s face broke into a grin.

“I knew it! I knew it!! Me too!!! Oh god don’t tell my father.” The two of them sat together all of that night, hugging, crying, and talking about how good Roy Haylock’s arse looked in tailored pants. That was when they became inseparable, and when Danny became the first person to ever hear the truth about Brian’s childhood in Russia.

Back to that Monday morning in 1968, where the two teenagers sat absorbed in the lessons of one Roy Haylock, both for very different reasons. Brian tried to contain his smile, looking at the boy next to him, who gazed forlornly at the older man’s brown eyes from where they sat. Mr Haylock turned to write something on the blackboard and Brian whispered to his friend “Noriega you’re hopeless.” Danny didn’t manage to contain his laughter and their teacher span around.

“Something funny Noriega?” Brian struggled not to smile at the blush creeping up Danny’s neck.

“No Sir, nothing. I was just… Thinking about… Comedy, Sir, because this is a class on Comedy… And comedy is, y know… Funny?” He hadn’t meant it to come off as talking back, but he had an unfortunate habit of keeping his foot in his mouth, and the poor excuse landed him a detention at lunch. Brian sagged at the thought of eating alone, but then remembered that there was a school baseball game on that lunch and he decided just to loose himself in the crowd. As he turned to leave at the end of the class, Danny whispered in his ear “Alone time with the love of my life… Maybe you’ll get lucky today as well? Find someone to get you over that Aaron dude? I know, I know, you guys are friends now and it’s all fine, but you need to get out there!!”

Brian only rolled his eyes and walked away, but something told him that he might just be right. While he went to go and find himself a place amongst the benches, Danny walked up to the front of the class and leant against the front desk.

“You know, Noriega, you could at least try not to stare?” Roy let out a laugh at Danny’s blush, watching the younger boy loose his confidence, knowing he’d been caught.

“Oh relax, I don’t mind, it’s quite flattering, I was almost afraid I was growing too old for my students to be hitting on me, though I must admit it was usually the girls.” Taking a seat, he patted the place across from him. The younger man sat, looking like he was half tempted to bolt. His face gave away nothing, but inside his mind was racing. How long had Roy known? For the two years he’d been studying with him? Would he tell? Was he interested in Danny or did he think the boy was nothing more than a joke? He decided his best bet was to avoid finding the answers to these questions, and to avoid giving his teacher any more ammunition with which to tease him.

“Do we need to have this conversation, Sir?” His hands clutched at each other in his lap.

“No, we don’t, but can we at least be honest with each other? You should call me Roy. Since you’ve spent the last two years ignoring my lessons in favour of my behind, I feel calling me Sir is rather thankless, unless you’re into that, since you haven’t yet learnt anything about Literary History and as such I can’t really consider myself your teacher. So, Danny, may I call you Danny? We need to talk about what you’re going to do after next year. As far as I’m aware, you’re one of the few students who hasn’t yet presented any sort of a plan, and that worries me. I mean some have rather dubious goals, such as professional gymnastics, but at least it’s a starting point. Do you have any ideas?” The younger boy looked at him with a rather guarded expression, confused as to what his teacher’s angle was. He didn’t seem to want to expose him, ridicule or punish him, but he wasn’t necessarily flirting either. For a man in his thirties in their social climate, his approach to the subject was astoundingly frank.

“Um… Well… I sing. I’m not planning on going to college, I’m not really good enough at math to excel, and manual labour doesn’t really suit me, more because I’m not exactly accepted in the work place than not being capable of the work itself, but I sing pretty well. I think I’m just gonna try and do that in bars, Sir. Roy. Sorry. And sorry about… That… I’m not very good at being discreet I guess.” He smiled carefully, looking up at Roy through lashes that the older man noticed upon looking were thick and coated in mascara. Roy smiled for a moment, before his eyes turned sad. He held out his hands to the younger boy, an offer for him to take him. For a moment they were left empty, but slowly Danny found himself placing one of his small hands within Roy’s two. The two men’s eyes met, and Roy made sure they locked this time. His brows were furrowed with concern.

“I worry about you Danny, I don’t mind in the least that you’re a flirt and that you wear Mascara outside of the clubs, but there are a lot of men who would, you were lucky with me. You’re vulnerable, living the life that you… That we lead. We’re vulnerable. When your very existence is considered wrong, you need to learn how to tread carefully, and dare I say it, be subtle. Either that or you need to learn where you are and aren’t safe. I don’t want to see you hurt, kid. You may be annoying as hell but you have a good heart.” The boy’s eyes blew wide as he listened to his teacher’s words, unable of stopping himself from leaning forwards.

“You’re gay?” Roy smiled and rolled his eyes.

“Clearly it’s not going to be easy to get the message through to you, if that’s all you got out of my deeply moving soliloquy. For starters, keep your voice down!! I could loose my job!” Danny drew back his hands and blushed a little. It made Roy’s heart beat a little faster, realising that he’d been disappointed to see the boy’s smile drop.

“Sorry, Sir.”

“It’s okay, kid. I know you don’t mean any harm, you’re young, you haven’t seen what the world can do to people like us yet, and I’d really rather you didn’t. Now I want you to know that I’m here if you need my advice on anything, this is my house address and phone number. Please don’t just come over for a booty call, this is for emergencies only. You seem like the sort who might just get himself into trouble every now and again. Now off you go, you’d better find Mr McCook, he looked more than a little lost when he went to eat without you.” Danny stood, he knees brushing against the other man’s as he did so, and looked down at the address and phone number in his hand. Looking more serious and contemplative than he ever had before, he turned and walked away. Just before he left, he looked back and said quietly

“Thank you, Roy.”

While all of this had been happening, Brian had been having a confrontation of his own. He’d been walking over to get a seat when he saw one of the team members, Cory, and a bunch of his friends, picking on a tall, skinny boy with a skin tight shirt, blazer and bag on the floor. One of the boy’s pushed him down, and he heard Cory use the word “fag.” On some ridiculous impulse, he ran and stepped between them. The only though running through his head was ‘Brian, what the hell are you doing?’ Before he rattled off the first comeback he could think of, hoping the confidence of his voice would mask the fluttering of his breath and shaking of his hands.

“Hey Cory, how’s your dad? We didn’t have much opportunity to catch up last time I saw him due to the fact he had my dick in his mouth.” Cory turned as red as a beet, his friends loosing it at the look on his face before they were all called away by the coach. Brian turned to help the boy up, surprised to see that he looked angry.

“You shouldn’t have done that.”

“Look, I’m sorry if I made you look weak or something but those guys shouldn’t be speaking to you like that, I had to say something. I’ll just leave it next time.” He turned to leave, but was stopped by a bony hand closing around his wrist.

“No, that’s not what I meant. It’s… Complicated… Can I talk to you somewhere private?” Brian’s first instinct was to draw away has arm, but looking up at the other boy he found himself hesitantly agreeing.

“Okay, fine. I’ve already screwed up my reputation of not existing for you, so why not? I’m Brian by the way, Brian McCook.” They started walking together, Brian allowing his companion to take the lead, and the older boy laughed quietly at the comment.

“Oh I know who you are, Brian, but… McCook? Seriously? What with your Russian Gymnast status I was expecting something harder to pronounce for a last name!” He was shocked. Not a single person other than Danny and one or two of their teachers had ever noticed him enough to connect his talent to his first name, nor to wonder what his last name was.

“Well… I changed my name when I was 11, my last name used to be Zamolodchikova. In case that makes you feel any better! Also how did you know who I was?” By this point they had found themselves sitting comfortably in an abandoned classroom, side by side on a rather small desk.

“Zamo- what now? What was your first name?” Brian’s smile faltered on his face.

“Oh we don’t talk about that. I’m Brian now, that’s all that matters. What about you? Am I allowed to know the name of the man who has dragged me away from a lunch with my adoring fans?”

“Justin Honard, pleasure to make your acquaintance.” Brian blanched hearing the name and almost forgot to shake the hand that had been held out to him.

“Wait, Justin as in Cory’s older brother? Man I’ve really put my foot in it haven’t I?” The other boy, Justin, let out a quiet laugh at Brian’s embarrassment and nudged him slightly until he began to smile again.

“It’s alright, you didn’t know. But yeah, complicated as I said. Cory wants a scholarship, he needs to stay on good terms with his teammates. He knows for sure I’m gay, and doesn’t care in the slightest, but if the rest of the team knew that he’d be in deep shit. So every now and again he joins in. I can see it bothers him, and he always spends ages at home trying to make it up to me, but there isn’t much else he can do.” Unconsciously, Brian’s hand snaked around Justin’s waist in a vain attempt to offer comfort.

“So… I have to ask, what the hell motivated you to step in there? None of us have ever had the slightest inclination you might be… You know… So why would you imply that you are when you’re not? And you don’t even know me!” Justin’s drawl had begun to make itself more and more known through the conversation as he started to relax, and the two found themselves smiling at each other’s odd habits.

“Well, for starters, I am. Totally. Full homo. So is my best friend Danny, but I suspect the whole city knows that.” He laughed at Justin’s surprised expression.

“But I don’t know what hit me really, I’ve never spoken at all to anyone here but Danny other than in answer to a question, so that was quite unexpected for me. I really do try not to get noticed. I don’t know, I guess it was just something about you. I never thought anyone as gangly as you could look graceful slumped in the dirt…” Their conversation went on for the rest of the hour’s lunch, and a little longer. During this time they learnt that both had briefly dated Aaron Coady and had kept him as a friend, and agreed that the three of them, plus Danny, really needed to hang out, maybe that night. Justin suggested a bar he knew, and Brian agreed, nodding excitedly.

“Why don’t we make it a date, plus two friends to make sure we don’t do anything… Regrettable?” Justin added, his cool exterior betrayed by the fact that he was very gently biting his lip, not that Brian had the slightest problem with the gesture.

“Sounds good, pick me up at 9?” With absolutely no warning, Justin leant forward and gave him the gentlest of kisses, pulling back to see a shocked and flustered Brian, cheeks turning pink. He grinned at the response and began to walk towards the door.

“Oh and Brian? As for how I know who you are, however could I forget a man with your show stopping flexibility? I try to keep track of these things.”

Yep. Danny was definitely right, this meeting was fate.