#not to jack myself off but the 'monica' in the dedication for i know the way it ends is. me. because im that much of a those freak

[lightyaoigami]

If you have to choose your favorites 5 scene/dialogue in Those, what would it be?

amazing question. i will not be including 'my doctor doesn't even consider me a smoker' because that's everyone's favorite already.

one

"When I first saw you at the funeral, I thought you'd be the same. Yet another of The Lady's beautiful court jesters. It surprises me when I'm wrong." "I'm glad that I obliged." "You haven't obliged me with anything yet. This dinner doesn't count." "You're a fast worker but I'm faster. We could have skipped this shit, you know? There's no need for dinner and candlelight at our age. And, y'know, neither of us is wearing a dress." "I wanted to speak with you," he says thoughtfully, following it up with a more cheerful: "And get you out of your clothes, but that goes without saying." "We could have done both of those things at your place." "No, I'd like to understand you." Something about his personality has changed. He's much more softly spoken and pure sounding, which worries me. The dreamy quality of his voice makes me feel pensive and angry, so I reach forward suddenly and pour myself another glass of wine. "I don't want to be understood. To be understood would make me dead."

two

I remember once when, back in the day, I went to a party. It was house party but it was in a really big house. We had to wear masks, so it was one of those parties. I wore a skull mask; a white skull. L was an abstract crow or something. He saw me just as I saw him and we knew. Couldn't see each other's faces, but we knew. That was a good night. Anyway, he didn't know that I was going to be there and I didn't know that he was going, so we were strangers. Only we knew. Point is, if I wasn't there, he would have found someone else. Someone less.

three

"I don't know, but it looks very important from where I'm standing." "Stand somewhere else then." My consistent smile parts my lips when I take a few long steps towards him until we're only inches apart. Well, I can't really see his suit anymore, which is what he wanted. "Like, here?" I ask. His panic is practically another person between us and he drops his briefcase, so this tactic must have been perfectly balanced and executed. I congratulate myself as I kneel down to pick it up to deliver the killing stroke. "I'll get it," he says hurriedly. "It's no problem," I say, smiling up at him in my most winning way. This is a tried and tested method and he out of everyone was a complete sucker for it, always. I grab the handle of his case with one hand and hold onto his leg with the other. For support, obviously. When I stand again, I can almost see the gleam in my eye reflected in his face. While he's apparently unable to move, I lean forward and breathe in over his neck, but I don't touch him until my face is so close to his that our noses barely glance and slide off each other. He sucks in air when I lick his cheek lightly with the tip of my tongue. He's dying inside. His poor eyes can't lie. "You know, you really should be more careful," I tell him, and tilt my face slightly so my lips hovers over his in some worshipping adoration. He pants softly, swallows and his eyes grow heavy as he looks at me, but I won't do anything unless he gives me a sign. An almost silent "Oh fuck" catches in his throat as he stares at me, and I drop his suitcase to the floor again. Hallelujah.

four

"Light, I'm not going to say this again until the next time you leave your wife for me, because you'll get bored of it, but you're the best person I've ever met and I'm proud of you. Of what you've done, despite what I might have said in the past, because I'm a liar and I was lying before. And I love you." Oh. I'm more stunned by how he says it than what he actually says and I don't know what to say, so I stuff something that I hope is only a slimy, battered carrot into my mouth instead, and it's revolting. Once I've finished chewing, I talk down to my plate. "It's really hard to cut spring onions all slanty like." "It looks like a forty-five degree angle." "It is." "Well done."

five

So, picture the scene. I was on my way to the door wearing one of my less good suits. That doesn't matter, but I think that it expresses something about my state of mind and health. But I didn't make it as far as the door. I was overwhelmed by a sudden sickness, ran to the bathroom and threw up my guts into the toilet until my throat burned and I nearly passed out. It was like how people describe botulism, only worse. Those bastards don't know how I suffered. Anyway, Kiyomi found me dying on the bathroom floor, and I remember it in the same daze I experienced then. L wasn't in my mind at the time because all I could think of was trying to find some way to stop feeling as terrible as I did. My mind was empty like the rest of me was, so I just lay on my side and hoped that it would pass. Some unprecedented disaster had happened and I was powerless to do anything.

bonus from i know the way it ends

"Your face was almost golden because of the lights everywhere. Remember the gold coin neon lights over the casino? The lights made you look like you were gilded. I've only seen you look at me like you did then a few times, but you were beautiful, I thought my heart would burst, I… Palpitations from all the coffee, probably but… yeah."

[thesassybooskter]

COWBOY SEAL CHRISTMAS by Nicole Helm: Excerpt & Giveaway

NOW AVAILABLE / SOURCEBOOKS CASABLANCA

Three former Navy SEALs

Injured in the line of duty

Desperate for a new beginning…

Searching for a place to call their own.

 Single mom and Revival Ranch’s on-site therapist Monica Finley has dedicated her life to helping brave servicemen and women, but former Navy SEAL Gabe Cortez is the one man whose shell she just can’t crack. Yet with the holidays fast approaching, she may finally have a plan. In a bid to get Gabe to open up, she’ll ask for as much help as possible—cutting down the Christmas tree, stringing lights, the whole nine yards.

Who could possibly be a Grinch with so much holiday cheer in the air?

Gabe has always hated Christmas—the holiday never fails to remind him just how alone he truly is. But the more time he spends with Monica and her young son, the more he finds himself drawn to their cozy little family…and the more he begins to realize his long-suppressed Christmas dreams may finally be coming true.

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  Excerpt

When a thump sounded loud somewhere out by the porch, Monica frowned. Her first thought was Colin had woken up, but it wasn’t right above them, like it should have been for that.

“Oh no,” Becca said, looking at where the thumping had come from.

“What? What is it?” Rose asked, wide eyed.

“Ron Swanson’s on the roof.”

Monica groaned. “Not the goat. Please, not the goat.”

“That’s what that sound is. He’s up there.” Becca looked imploringly at Monica. “You have to get Rasputin.” Becca’s rooster was the only thing that could ever get Ron off the roof. “I mean, I could get him, but I’d need someone to hold me upright, as the world’s kind of spinning.”

Monica wasn’t exactly steady on her feet, but she wasn’t going to send a pregnant woman or a completely loaded woman to do the job. Which meant it fell to her. She pushed to her feet. “Rose, I hope your retroactive bachelorette party doesn’t involve goats or roosters.”

“From your lips to God’s ears,” Rose returned as Monica pulled on her winter gear. She lost her balance a bit but caught herself by leaning against the wall as she pulled on her second boot.

“You okay there, champ?” Rose asked with some concern.

“I think a little drunk is necessary for me to even attempt to touch that rooster.” Monica pulled on her hat. “If I’m not back in twenty, send a search party after me. I imagine the rooster has pecked my eyes out.”

“Rasputin wouldn’t do that. Not both eyes anyway.”

“Uh-huh. I’ll be back.” Monica stepped out into the icy night. As she stepped off the porch, she looked up at the dazzling sky above. Stars twinkled everywhere, and the moon’s light bathed the snowy ranch in silver. Becca had strung Christmas lights all over the house and barn, so red and green cut through all that white.

Monica took a deep breath. Oh, it was beautiful. How lucky she was to have come here, to get to experience this.

Then she remembered herself and turned to look up at the roof. And there was a goat, munching on a wreath, while red and green lights sparkled around him. She doubted very much that many people got to experience this.

She pulled her phone out and took a picture of Ron Swanson on the roof, chuckling to herself. Before she could head for the barn to get Rasputin, she heard a truck rumble in the distance, then saw headlights cutting through the dark.

When the truck came to a stop, Jack slid out of the driver’s seat and glared up at the roof. “Damn goat.”

“I’m on my way to get Rasputin. Unless, as the only sober one, you want to handle that for me.” Monica smiled winsomely.

Jack grimaced. “Oh, fine, but keep an eye on those two. They’re going to need help getting to the bunkhouse. Just keep them inside the truck till I’m back.”

“Sure.”

Jack strode to the barn and Monica peered into the truck. She thought both Gabe and Alex were passed out, until the back door swung open.

Monica jumped, taken aback as Gabe stumbled down from the truck. Monica waved a hand in front of her face as the smell of alcohol and bar hit her like a punch. “Dear Lord, how much did you have to drink?”

“S-still conscious s’apparently not ’nough,” he said, falling to a knee, then getting back to his feet and brushing the snow off his pants.

“Jack said you’re supposed to stay in the truck.”

“Jack ain’t never been my commanding officer, and he’s not starting now.” Gabe took a step toward her, stumbled again, and she reached forward to try and help keep him upright. Except then they were both somehow in the snow, Gabe something like half on top of her.

He didn’t get up, and she was shocked enough to just lie there in the cold, icy snow with his dark eyes assessing her.

“You smell pretty.”

Monica laughed in spite of herself. “You need to work on your drunk compliments.” She pushed at his chest. “Get off me.” Good Lord, it was a hard chest. Even under his coat and heavy shirt, she could feel the strength of him.

But Gabe rolled off her and got to his feet. He held out a gloved hand, and she let him pull her to her feet. But then he pulled her closer, not letting go of her hand. His head tilted down to her ear, much like it had in the bunkhouse the other day.

“I doubt you want to hear my other compliments, s-sweetheart.”

It was a slur more than a stutter, and he was falling-down drunk and foolish, so she did not shudder at that. Not at all. “Don’t let alcohol put words in your mouth, Gabe.”

He kept his grip on her hand, pulling her so close their bodies touched. It shouldn’t have mattered. They were both wearing enough layers to ward off the cold of a Montana winter night. She didn’t feel cold. Shivery maybe, but not cold.

“Oh, I have those words when I’m sober too. I’ve just got enough sense to keep them to myself.” His lips barely touched her ear as she spoke. “Sparks, remember?”

She could only stare at him, and she didn’t feel all the icy wetness on her back or the frigid chill of the air around them. She only felt his big hand holding on to hers and, somehow, all that heat emanating off him. “I remember.”

He leaned closer, so close his cheek actually pressed to hers. Everything inside of her rioted to some sparkling life. A feeling so long forgotten it was almost foreign, centering itself low in her belly.

“Drunk enough to make a bad decision?” he asked in a low, rough voice.

She paused. Even knowing it should be an automatic no, there was that foreign part of her tempted. A bad decision with him sounded enticing instead of wrong. Something she deserved instead of something she should avoid.

But he was drunk. She was a little too. That was all that foreign part was. The loss of sense and control, and she’d never let herself give in to that. “N-no.”

He grinned, pulling back, all wolfish in the silvery light of the moon. “Too bad.” Then he was striding…well, stumbling, toward the bunkhouse.

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About Nicole Helm

Nicole Helm writes down-to-earth contemporary romance specializing in people who don’t live close enough to neighbors for them to be a problem. When she’s not writing, she spends her time dreaming about someday owning a barn. She lives with her husband and two young sons in O’Fallon, Missouri.

Website | Twitter | Facebook | Goodreads

COWBOY SEAL CHRISTMAS by Nicole Helm: Excerpt & Giveaway was originally published on The Sassy Bookster

[kartiavelino]

‘Overboard’ and ‘Mom’ star Anna Faris is making motherhood fun again

If Anna Faris hadn’t gone into appearing, she’d have made an excellent therapist. Right here you’re, simply making an attempt to interview her about her new film “Overboard,” a remake of the 1987 Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn rom-com, and earlier than you recognize it she’s slyly asking the questions as a substitute — about childhood, work, the firefly inhabitants in your space. (She’s method into bugs.) This is an uncommon trait in an actor; the career steadily requires a sure stage of narcissism. Nevertheless it’s a top quality that has made Faris profitable as host of the podcast “Unqualified,” through which she chats with well-known visitors but in addition dives headlong into her callers’ issues, usually getting borderline choked up as she talks them by heartbreak or dysfunctional household dynamics or the planning of marriage proposals. Gown, $5,275, and denim jacket, $1,375, each at Versace, 647 Fifth Ave.; “Aleesha” mules, $1,295 at Giuseppe Zanotti, 806 Madison Ave.; 14-k white-gold earrings with diamonds, $2,530 at EF Assortment; Lili Claspe x Ritani 14-k yellow-gold ring with diamonds, $1,310 at Ritani.Sheryl Nields “I simply needed some interactions that didn’t need to do with movie star,” says the 41-year-old Faris, clad in a T-shirt and ripped denims. Her wide-eyed face nonetheless bears traces of the make-up from our cowl shoot at a sunlit Santa Monica home, the place we’re hanging out upstairs within the artwork studio. Earlier than she began her podcast in 2015, she says, “I used to be attending to really feel like each time I talked to any individual, it was like I didn’t have any type of real connection. I discovered myself turning into actually introverted, even agoraphobic. And I didn’t wish to cease exploring — this sounds so f–kin’ lofty — the thought of human connection. And of loneliness.” This quiet, introspective lady is a marked distinction from the slapstick comedian who an hour earlier had our whole Alexa crew in stitches, and who obtained her begin within the satirical “Scary Film” sequence, parlaying her four-film run right into a profession of outsized roles: a past-her-prime Playmate in “The Home Bunny”; a neurotic hedonist in “What’s Your Quantity?”; a coked-up, sword-wielding model of herself within the Key & Peele comedy “Keanu.” “Keenen [Ivory Wayans, director of ‘Scary Movie’] advised me at some point that the rationale I used to be solid was as a result of I had no thought what made me humorous,” she says. “I cherished that. I contemplated it. I by no means thought I’d make it as an actor generally. I had by no means been a part of the comedic world.” Does she know what makes her humorous now? “I feel it’s my ridiculous faces,” she says after a pause. “Or the truth that I desperately wish to be taken significantly. Most likely a mixture there.” She’ll be utilizing these comedic chops again in her just-released movie. “It was terrifying to remake a film that I cherished a lot rising up,” she says of the unique “Overboard,” which noticed Hawn enjoying a bitchy socialite whose amnesia is exploited by Russell’s blue-collar carpenter to make her assume she’s his spouse and the mom of his 4 unruly sons. Within the up to date model, Faris takes on the Russell position: She’s a working mother who hoodwinks an obscenely rich man-child (performed by Mexican celebrity Eugenio Derbez) into taking good care of her home and daughters whereas she research to turn out to be a nurse. “At first I used to be like, ‘What do you imply, we’re switching roles? I wish to be the one with the loopy character arc!’” says Faris, who may simply emulate Hawn’s look. However in the end, she says, she embraced the swap, and factors out that the love story between the couple (arguably essentially the most uncomfortably retro factor of the unique) isn’t entrance and middle on this model. “I like that my character is simply kind of too burdened together with her life to have [romance] be any type of focus,” she says. “As an individual who’s been — in my private life and within the characters I play — making an attempt to please all people round me and win a dude or no matter, I simply appreciated that.” This is smart, given what’s been occurring in her life recently: Faris break up from her husband, actor Chris Pratt, final yr after eight years of marriage, and the media scrutiny has been intense. Including to the awkwardness of this was the arrival of Faris’ 2017 memoir, additionally known as “Unqualified,” written earlier than the break up however revealed after it. Each Pratt and Faris have stated publicly that they’re nonetheless good mates and dedicated to co-parenting their 5-year-old son, Jack. For the time being, very like her characters in “Overboard” and the CBS sitcom “Mother,” Faris is squarely targeted on her child and her profession. Positive, she’s obtained extra sources than her working-class movie counterparts, however says she nonetheless struggles in opposition to expectations to be the proper mom. “As a girl, particularly, there’s that inevitable lack of id,” she says. “I really feel like I get judged on mother e-mail chains, if I didn’t contribute to the factor, however I meant to, or no matter. There’s this fixed undercurrent of guilt.” Brandon Maxwell jacket, $1,121 at Shopbop; Brandon Maxwell high, $1,295, and denims, $475, each at Saks Fifth Avenue; SJP by Sarah Jessica Parker “Doe” slingbacks, $375 at SJP Pop-Up Store, 6 W. 52nd St.; Earrings, $995 at Ariel Gordon Jewellery.Sheryl Nields She goals for Zen and often lands somwhere close to ok. “Am I doing this proper? Do I care? Not likely,” she says, giving voice to the narrative in her head. “Is he gonna put these Legos in his mouth? Perhaps. Do I care? I’m unsure. He’s gonna vomit within the pool. Do I care? Not likely. “However,” she continues, “I feel he’s a bit of stronger as a result of I’m not a lot of a helicopter mother or father. Once I watch Jack overcome a worry or work one thing out on his personal, I’ll see him take a look at me throughout the room and I’m like, ‘You bought this, dude.’ And my coronary heart will simply fill with pleasure as he figures it out and is courageous.” An English-major graduate of the College of Washington, Faris was a self-proclaimed offended teen whose drama-club crowd was nicknamed the Bat-Cavers. She’s lengthy agitated for roles which can be extra advanced than Hollywood has typically supplied girls. Her temporary, devilish 2003 look as a ditzy actress in Sofia Coppola’s “Misplaced in Translation” is one of many movie’s underrated pleasures. In 2007, she performed a stoner named Jane within the indie “Smiley Face,” which stays certainly one of her favourite elements. “I feel that film made about 200 bucks. However I’d get up so thrilled that I’d get to say these scrumptious traces from this f – – ked-up character who wasn’t chasing a man.” It impressed her, she says, to push for modifications to her subsequent position: “I attempted to make a case in ‘The Home Bunny’ for no love curiosity,” she says. “However you win some, you lose some. I like Colin Hanks, so … that’s OK. However,” she says, brightening up, “Christy hasn’t had too many love pursuits.” Christy can be Faris’ lead position, almost 5 years operating, on “Mother,” the place she performs a single mom and recovering alcoholic regularly reconciling together with her personal unorthodox mother, Bonnie (Allison Janney). The present is notable for its largely feminine solid and an unwavering give attention to the method of dependancy restoration — not, at first look, the pure stuff of comedy. “It feels refreshing,” says Faris. “I like the moments after we all get to be broad and humorous however then additionally get the chance to be intimate, particularly in that multicamera format, and to succeed in out and transfer folks indirectly. The traces, you recognize, are not often even actually gender-specific.” On the present, whose season finale is Might 10, Faris’ character struggles with a brand new temptation (after beforehand almost relapsing on alcohol). “Christy succumbs to a weak spot, which is playing, one thing I’m actually not good at,” Faris says with fun. “I feel you possibly can in all probability learn each expression that’s crossing my face.” That transparency is channeled on her podcast, which she says has made her really feel extra in command of her personal narrative.“I really feel like I can inform my story the way in which I wish to. Not that I wish to share all the things,” she says, “however no less than understanding I may is very nice.” Off-White jacket, $1,145, and denims, $660, each at Saks Fifth Avenue, 611 Fifth Ave.; “Maidugur” pumps, $995 at Manolo Blahnik, 31 W. 54th St.; 14-k white-gold earrings with diamonds, $2,530 at EF Assortment. Sheryl Nields Alexander Wang cami high, $395 at FWRD; Alexander Wang “Stack Tie” denims, $375 at Internet-A-Porter; 14-k white-gold choker necklace with diamonds, $3,525 at EF Assortment. Sheryl Nields Ben Taverniti Unravel Mission denim jacket, $910 at Saks Fifth Avenue.; Denims, $355 at Ulla Johnson, 15 Bleecker St.; 14-k white-gold choker necklace with diamonds, $3,525 at EF Assortment. Sheryl Nields Ben Taverniti Unravel Mission denim jacket, $910 at Saks Fifth Avenue.; Denims, $355 at Ulla Johnson, 15 Bleecker St.; “Tegan” pumps, $875 at Jimmy Choo; 14-k white-gold ring with diamonds, $3,925 at Ritani. Sheryl Nields Up Subsequent Ex-firefighter union chief arrested after drunkenly crashing automotive, fleeing scene: cops The previous head of town’s firefighter’s union was arrested… 4 View Slideshow Style Editor: Serena French; Stylist: Anahita Moussavian; Hair: Richard Marin for Cloutier; Remix utilizing Leonor Greyl; Make-up: Jill Cady for Cloutier; Remix utilizing Koh Gen Do; Manicurist: Ashlie Johnson at The Wall Group utilizing Chanel Vernis Anna Faris was shot on location at 1427 Georgina Ave., Santa Monica, Calif. The luxurious four-bedroom house (full with a 45-foot-long pool and out of doors eating area) is listed for $7.25M by the Company’s Santiago Arana and Griffin Riddle. Extra info right here or name 310-890-3306. Share this: https://nypost.com/2018/05/09/overboard-and-mom-star-anna-faris-is-making-motherhood-fun-again/ The post ‘Overboard’ and ‘Mom’ star Anna Faris is making motherhood fun again appeared first on My style by Kartia. http://www.kartiavelino.com/2018/05/overboard-and-mom-star-anna-faris-is-making-motherhood-fun-again.html