#not to be like so sheltered ik all the trans ppl who follow me are like this is literally just a tuesday afternoon but there are not many

[zemnarihah]

i think one of the girls in my graphics class may be trans NOT to assume anyones gender ever but like she is very clearly like obviously presenting as very feminine like almost anyone would assume she is a girl like i would say she "passes" or whatever as a girl yk? but my prof was talking to me and was pointing out stuff abt her work as an example and kept saying he and him and i didnt even realize until later what was going on like i thought maybe he was talking abt someone else or smth or that maybe I had assumed her pronouns wrong and he knew from canvas or smth bc i never had even considered that she was maybe trans and then later she talked in front of the class abt her project and it wasnt until i heard her voice that was a little lower i was like oh my god the professor was like. straight up purposefully misgendering her i think. like it could not have been an innocent mistake clearly she is presenting as a girl and looks like a girl. and he was misgendering her TO ME and i didnt even realize and just acted like it was normal and she was sitting nearby probably overhearing the whole thing....

[butch-reidentified]

Since you've said you support people who transition to deal with sex dysphoria provided they don't use single-sex spaces of the opposite sex or refer to themselves as men/women, what do you think of those who genuinely pass to the extent where it would be near impossible to live like that without detransitioning? Such as a biological woman who looks so much like a biological male to people around her that she can't call herself a woman without being met with massive confusion (or people thinking she's joking), who can't use the womens room without being assumed to be some creep guy, etc. so she just uses the mens and refers to herself as a man casually for the sake of simplicity. Do you support people like that or think they should detransition or try to pass less? (I am aware this is very rare)

[I wouldn't say I've said I support it, so much as I've said I empathize with last-resort transitioners who've failed every other treatment attempt & I don't necessarily think we understand enough to outright say it's /never/ an acceptable treatment option - but I don't think it should ever be the first line treatment]

trans people who live "stealth" you mean? I don't rly think about it much. it is genuinely rare, and imho, for a MTF, a huge part of "passing" is blending in with female socialization.

I do know 1 like this to an extreme. He doesn't claim to me a woman, but he actually passes universally, largely because his personality & early childhood trauma makes him really come across as if he's female socialized, and he never really displayed any male socialization behaviors, not even minor ones (I don't know how to explain this, truly, but I've known him far too long and far too closely, know all his family and childhood friends etc, to deny that this is true. ppl here have been angry at me before for saying this but it's literally just the truth, I didn't do anything but observe it. what am i supposed to do, lie? that's not who i am). but if male violence is a result of male socialization, which I do believe, then it follows that the lack of male socialization behavior could mean he's safer, idk bc this is such an anomaly situation, and every woman I know who knows him (all of whom are normies or even anti trans) has expressed that they feel so much that they're interacting with a woman that it's hard to even comprehend that he's not. a couple of times, people have straight up thought he was lying when he said he was male.

he feels no need to be viewed as a woman socially. he doesn't even perform femininity. he shops in the women's section only bc that's what fits, but sticks to jeans and hiking-style pants, regular ass t-shirts, sneakers or hiking boots. doesn't own makeup, doesn't remove body hair, etc. the "passing" was never intentional, just a result of how his behavior is perceived + his body responded to cross-sex hormones way more drastically than I've ever seen. in his case, though, he's against males in women's spaces to begin with so it's not even a thing. I kinda doubt there's anyone like him, if there are there can't be many, and I'd kinda suspect they'd also share his perspective of not wanting to be in this spaces to begin with. but I just don't feel super strongly about it. in general, I don't feel AS strongly about bathrooms as I do about changing rooms or especially vulnerable spaces like shelters. ik this isn't really an answer but it's what I got. I see more nuance to this than many women simply because of knowing him. but if someone passed THAT well then it wouldn't rly matter what the bathroom laws are bc they're not gonna be caught? so it's kind of pointless to talk about it bc you can't legislate it & people are gonna do what they want whether I or anyone likes it or not 🤷