#not that it doesn't. if thats how it makes you feel.
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just a sagau genshin abt the newest banner (geo & hydro dragon my love) (the creator is self insert) LOTS OF OOC
a/n : written in rush cuz i randomly think abt this after knewing next phase banner and i hope i got both of them, i was gonna added about how i forgot ayato & childe exist when i planning on which dps from each vision should i pull, but they make no sense so i didnt include it.
"I didnt mean to look down on your choice, Your Grace. But, didnt your cousin says itll be better just to pull me...?"
You look at Zhongli with the most unserious, more like silly face, thinking about hes actually jealous of your choice on pulling for Neuvillette.
While it's true you need his shield and he would be the first Geo 5 star you have, but who wouldnt want a hydro dragon pure water tester PLUS a water machine gun to pew pew those enemies!
And more better? You have an unbuild Furina too!
"But my cousin also says he would comeback to genshin to pull for Nupi!"
If Zhongli able to curse, he will.
when will you also gave him a cute, silly lil nickname to him too?
"But like, Your Grace—"
"Shhsshhh"
You quickly shut him, putting your own finger on his lips, making a small blush creep onto the Geo Archon.
Zhongli can feel the side eye Neuvillette gave him as the Hydro dragon sips on his pure water.
"But, Your—"
Seriously, you never saw this version of him thats cant control his own usual calm demeanor, but the version you see is the impatient and insists that his opinion is the best.
Not like he's wrong though.
You put your own finger on you lips now and did a mewing pose, kinda making those two old dragon sigh.
whats wrong with this generation...
"Zhongli, hear me out. Nupi is a nuke, or else should i say Nukelet? Thats suit you isnt it?"
Neuvillette sighed again, but he didnt hide his chuckle about his Creator giving him more silly nickname.
"Pardon me, Your Grace. While it doesn't matter to me that you call me that, but I'm a dragon, not a nuke. I dont boom myself"
"But youre a boomer."
"Was that supposed to be a joke?"
"No."
Back to Zhongli. Hes still thinking countless reason about why you should pull for him.
I mean, his material is easier to get (even if youre the Creator and couldve just easily get everything you want), his talent is useful (SHIELD??? BIG PILLARS???? THROWING BIG ROCKS TO THE ENEMIES?????), he got many fans (BUT ITLL BE USELESS IF HIS CREATOR DIDNT WANT TO PULL HIM), he got many fanfics (HE KNEW YOU LIKE TO READ THEM AND HE WILL HACK THE TUMBLR TO SHOWS UP MANY FANFICS ABOUT HIM ON YOUR DASHBOARD BUT EXCLUDING THE HURT/NO COMFORT BCS HE KNEW YOU DESPISE THEM)
But then he come to a conclusion, as he clapped his hand.
"Your Grace, if Sir Neuvillette have Furina on your team, what about Xiao?"
Fuck he was right. WHAT ABOUT YOUR XIAO????? HE NEED HIS FATHER FIGURE!!!!
"Youve got a point..." you pose like the trade offer meme.
"So, who should i choose now? is it you, Sir Zhongli, or is it you, Monsieur Neuvillette?"
"Uhm, pardon me but, why dont you just get us?" ask Neuvillette, putting his cup on the table.
"Dont you think itll be better, Your Grace? You get two dragons and you also have their companions on your team."
"Monsieur, i dont have that kind of money. Im still in high school, heck, a boarding school! Even if i have guaranteed now, i dont think i can."
"But our banner started on your holidays..."
"Ok now you got another point"
"So, what you gonna do?"
"I'll take two dragon, please"
Perhaps Zhongli should thank Neuvillette for his suggestion.
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another a/n : i post this cuz im at my home, suffering from another sudden sickness (i keep getting nauseous and vomiting plus a bad fever & headache but idk what causes them can anyone tell me 😭) also i have a tooth extraction scheduled on Monday so yeah... wished my future self a good luck
#achi's#achi's writing#genshin impact fluff#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact imagines#genshin impact#genshin self aware au#genshin impact sagau#sagau#genshin x you#genshin x reader#genshin fanfic#PHASE 5.2 IS SICK#zhongli#zhongli x reader#zhongli x you#neuvillette#neuvilette genshin#neuvillette x reader#neuvillette x you#genshin impact x you
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the election results have me feeling really bummed out as a closeted/pre-everything transmasc person. i feel like im grieving a version of myself that will never get to exist because im too scared
hey it's okay to feel this way, i'm sorry you're so scared right now
something i'd like everyone to keep in mind is that it's literally impossible for trump to change everything overnight. i hate our government but it has to fight with itself in order to function. individual states in the country are proposing some very questionable and unsafe bills, but it's not a reason to give up hope. there will always be states in our country like California who have and maintain strong enough trans protection laws that people will still have somewhere to go
change when it comes to government is gradual. it doesn't happen over night. that's how transphobes and republicans want you to feeel. they want you to give up, to become defeated and to never, ever try to transition. youre not wrong for feeling bummed, but do not give up on your transition because of them. that's what they want. fight like hell for your future. fight like hell for your comfort and identity
if anything now is the best time to get started. trump literally cannot do anything until January. and even then that's the motion of attempting to put bills and laws into action. attempting. there's no guarantee anything will be passed. reminder that we lived thru 4 years of trump before and barely anything happened. republicans are not as scary as we think they are. trump is a fascist yes but he can only do so much when it comes to bickering with the rest of the government
government moves slowly. change happens gradually. if you need help relocating to a safer place, feel free to ask. pursue transition now if you have the ability to. don't let some fascists get into your head and make you think it will literally be impossible. i promise it won't. they want you to get scared and feel like they're so powerful you can't do anything. fortunately the're not. you don't have to give up on your future. you don't have to give up on transition
take care of yourself, okay? it's okay to feel bummed but don't let them get too deep into your head. thats exactly what they want. they want all the trannies to detransition, go back into the closet, or never transition. and it's okay if people do this. but this is what they want. im going to continue being shamelessly trans. im going to continue being a tranny who looks acts and sounds queer. i know not every queer can do this. i know not every trans preson has that luxury
if you genuinely can't medically or socially transition it's alright. a lot of people just can't. it genuinely is very unsafe for many people. but i just want to stress that things will not become 1000x worse over night. you still have a chance. and there are people fighting for your right to transition right now. we will continue to fight harder. defeat is not an option- we will not let it be.
good luck, i hope you're able to feel better soon. take care of youreslf, no matter what you choose it's okay. but remember that change happens gradually. we will adapt
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review sockathan ! 👻👻👻
woah how'd you make that green
SOCKATHAN YAOI REVIEW
Disclaimer: This will contain spoilers (kind of) for Welcome to Hell 2 Part 1 and Welcome to Hell. You should probably go watch that. Its made by Erica Wester and its PRETTY cool.)
My Yaoi Entrepreneurs, I'll be blunt with you. I know we've ALL seen gay people, maybe in the streets, maybe at the park. You might even see one in your home now, so lets be honest with ourselves. Sock is DEFINITELY gay, bisexual at LEAST.
The OTHER one on the other hand.. its a little bit harder to say.. I'll probably find something though..
Lets make one thing clear, when I say Yaoi in this review. I don't mean ANYTHING inappropriate. Its just my special way of saying gay people.. I'm kinda magical in that sense.
Lets just get the first one done and over with a simple section I like to call:
EVIDENCE 1: SOCK IN GENERAL
okay so FIRST of all the FIRST time we see sock, they call Jonathan "hot stuff" while being in a fridge. I'm not sure about you but that's love if I ever saw it.
After that they introduce you to Sock killing his parents. One key point after another. If Sock being gay wasn't important, then WHY was it shown BEFORE telling us Sock's (other) main trait. Checkmate liberals.
Sock would then get the report from Mephistopheles, and you COULD say its just because the camera zoomed in, but its literally the most light ever seen in Sock's eyes.
And then Sock went on to ruin Jonathan's day, making him look crazy, and Jonathan SOMEHOW got blamed for knocking down that desk, I swear I think the teachers just hate him. I'm not sure about you but I certainly cant KNOCK over a desk thats right next to me.
He was WRITING too.. would a guilty man of desk flipping WRITE?? NO!!
And not to mention that Sock made Jonathan look DUMB in front of the faceless brothers which was probably the closest time that Sock did their job right.
Sock absolutely ruined it today.. but can you blame them? They're new to the job, give them some SLACK.
But the upcoming days, Sock was so whimsical.
Yeah SURE. Sock is still telling Jonathan to kill himself, but they just don't want to get fired!!
Not to mention the fact that they stared at Jonathan while they were taking a piss, but there's nothing odd about that.
And also near the end, Mephistopheles calls sock out on liking the guy, and Sock stutters. You just have to take my word for it.
SOCK IN GENERAL 2 [PART 1]
If you saw Welcome to Hell 2 [Part 1], you already know what I'm gonna comment about. Sock went on to call Jonathan's mother, hot. They then went on to say "Must be where you got it from, huh? You definitely got her butt at least."
When Jonathan goes on a walk and Sock follows them and says after Jonathan says he doesn't wanna be friends with them. (We'll get back to that)
"Oh wow, come to think of it, You don't really have ANYONE do YOU? What's that feel like? Knowing you're gonna die alone." to which Jonathan snaps back with "I dunno Sock, you tell me."
Now at first, this looks like a scene of ANTI SOCKATHAN propaganda, but think with me here, yaoiers. How would Jonathan know that Sock died alone??
I understand if he just guessed, since sock DOES look like someone who would die alone, or he just said whatever comeback that came to his head but if not, Sock ALREADY told Jonathan about their past life.
If what I KNOW is true, Sock VENTED to Jonathan about their life before they died in LESS than a week, since Sock just now sees Jonathan's mother in the first part, and due to a comment made by the creator.
Sock REALLY trusts this guy, maybe Mephistopheles didn't want to hear them vent, but maybe its JUST because Sock wanted Jonathan to do the same. but they probably didn't.
And then near the end, Sock says to Jonathan when he snatched his employee manual
"Jonathan, if something happens to you-"
Actually, I think this is pretty weak evidence but I thought I'd include it, since a teacher would say the same thing if a kindergartener was up on a high shelf.
That segment was PRETTY lengthy, but I PROMISE you, the others will be shorter, I just.. didn't expect there to be so much for Sock...
EVIDENCE 2: SOCK SUCKS AT THEIR JOB.
Jonathan was DEAD ON when they told Sock that they suck at their job. And quite honestly.. I could've done it better.. I could've got Jonathan to kill himself (theoretically) on the FIRST day, and if you wouldn't use my strategy, I promise you that there's probably several other you could use for the teenager that you want them to kill themselves at home.
STEP 1: GRAB A WEAPON
Since Sock is seen to be able to flip over a desk and they're able to HOLD Jonathan's journal (Shock or not), I should THEORITCALLY be able to grab a weapon, now for this strategy, I suggest you pick a nonlethal option, only to have a lethal option around, for this example, I will be using a sledgehammer.
After swinging that at the noggin, Jonathan would drop unconscious, probably with brain damage (that don't matter though)
STEP 2: POSSESS THE TEENAGER
Now it MAY not be like this in w2h, but Mephistopheles was able to possess Jonathan when he was DEAD (Probably), so It should hopefully work when they're out of consciousness.
STEP 3: KILL YOURSELF.
Alright now I KNOW that sounds bad.. but it wouldn't be MY hands to kill him. Grab the nearby lethal and SHOOT. THAT. TEENAGER!! Your boss may not agree with the logistics of this, but you get the job done.
This simulation was to PROVE that Sock atleast CARES a bit about Jonathan to want to get to know him. and to not kill him on the spot. Now if It was the other way around.. I'm not exactly sure..
EVIDENCE 3: JONATHAN KINDA HATES SOCK
(he looks like hes standing up to a school bully)
At the beginning of Welcome to Hell, hes clearly annoyed and STILL is annoyed by some of Sock's actions by the end, but he atleast isn't mad enough to NOT act like he could put up with Sock. I think the closest thing to gayness from Jonathan was when he moved the backpack for Sock to sit down.
In Welcome to Hell 2, he IS PISSED at this guy, and honestly, if Sock kept on knocking down those desks, i CANT blame him..
Maybe Sock kinda ruined the vibe when they expressed their love for Jonathan's mother, its hard to say really..
Jonathan makes this very clear that he DOESN'T even wanna be Sock's friend, I mean HAVE YOU HEARD THE THEME SONG?
SUMMARY:
Sock wasn't able to win Jonathan's heart, making him tonight's biggest loser.
YAOI: 6.5/10
#welcome to hell#w2h#w2h2#w2h sock#w2h jonathan#welcome to hell 2#sockathan#sock sowachowski#yaoi#yaoireview#jonathan combs
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Hi I’m a big fan of your blog , love how you draw the characters!!
How do you think monkey king and suklha would court each other.
Helloww ♡♡♡
Funny you ask that!!! 😭 i just finished a doodle about that too!
Since Wukong's a hot tempered and unpredictable monkey king with a high self esteem. I like to add a bit of Monkey facts in his behaviour. Ofc besides the fighting the gods to keep his lover i dont think thats normal monke
From what i know, male monkeys usually start the flirting to enter a sort of consortship with the female. So i believe, Wukong despite the virgin that he is. Would be the first one to show interest.
Monkeys usually spend time with their future mate during courtship, so i figured instead of eating and talking to eachother to spend time. Wukong would challenge Suklha during the first few stages of courtship, if Suklha manages to outwit him he would let out these noises thats a mix of excited chirps and amused chuckles. Seeing Suklha managed to beat him in his own challenge is akin to her saying
"oh you're good, but ill try and beat you to show you im capable of being beside you"
even better when Suklha lets him groom her properly, it would take hours upon hours for him to show her that he's a good mate to keep her pretty and light colored hair clean. Suklha sitting down and waiting for him to finish, only to groom him back with her own pinchers is a sign that she accepted Wukong's feelings. (In his head anyway)
This works with Suklha, too. Centipedes spend time with their mates to start the mating ritual. Female centipedes usually release certain pheromones to attract the male interest. Wukong might notice how she has a more enzymatic scent, floral and berry-like, reminding him of the tree peaches in flower fruit mountain. This works with monkeys, although i think they release a certain odour when they want to mate rather than... courtship-
This in turn, makes Wukong more physically affectionate towards Suklha. His hands never leaving her waist whenever they talk to someone, glaring at anyone who dares to come pick her up like some sort of harlot. Wukong would compliment her to make her pay attention to him more whenever they're in public, of course this is Wukong. Hes not that good with compliments-
Suklha : you dimwit! Ive told you before how to do it!
Wukong : It seemed like i was right at first! Why are you getting so mad over! Just because you're decent-looking doesn't mean you can reprimand me however you like!
Suklha : ...?
Wukong , counting his fingers : Smart, quick-witted, courteous! Just because you're all that doesn't mean you can shout at me all you want!!
Suklha : i..
Wukong : AND STOP LOOKING SO GOOD
Suklha : IM BREATHING???
Wukong : WELL YOU LOOK GOOD DOING IT
Lastly, it would be a hard way to recognize but Wukong would speak towards her with a deeper tone of voice than usual. He'd even try to talk to her more calmly than yelling high-pitched like usual.
He'll smile more and probably do anything, yes even kill some demons and yaoguai to get an object of her desire or something that reminds him of her. Like a red jacket he saw in a village near the mountains, he'll snatch it and put it on Suklha without any word. Not even a "here's a new jacket" nope. They're already this deep in the courtship stage, she should understand what he means when he gives her things. He might glare at Suklha whenever he sees her missing the object he's given her, no words, just bites and glares.
All in all, it would be a bit chaotic. Like seeing your two best friends slowly getting together. Especially Suklha who despite showing interest in the courtship, suddenly denied Wukong of her answer after his proposal. Of course, this isn't done out of spite. She knows the consequences of accepting his proposal and she wont let a creature of this world suffer due to her. Suklha is a trickster, but she still has a heart.
#¿ — ask#🦭—oc#✍️—doodles#🎨—galleria#📖—writings#Suklha#jttw wukong#jttw sun wukong#jttw#jttw oc#sun wukong#sun wukong x oc#wukong x oc#oc#original character#black myth wukong oc#black myth : wukong#black myth sun wukong#wukong didnt stop there ofc#bro reincarnated and got buddha to remake his wifey thats kind acrazy ngl#this is all crazy#i had to read 3 journals abt monke courting 😭😭😭
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i would like to hear your thoughts ❤️
gahhhh okay no one throw rocks at me, this is buck x oc
adam has been a nurse for a long time. he's dealt with trauma after trauma, met so many firefighters and paramedics but none with a bigger heart than evan buckley. he's seen him around a few times, the station 118 is pretty well known in their hospital for being a bit a problem station. people are constantly getting stabbed and struck by lightning, evan buckley in particular seems like maybe he pissed off god personally. they exchanged a few words here and there, laughed at a few of the others jokes, but every time they lock eyes, buck makes quick work to look away and bite the inside of his cheek. adam specializes in hurt and believe him, buck seems... hurt.
it isn't until they bring in a young kid, probably 16 or 17, with bruises and cuts all over his body. he was beaten until- well, until it was pretty touch and go for a minute there. two of them hang back in particular, hen and buck. he's talked to hen before, back when she was going through med school, she told him about her wife and kids, how hard she was fighting for them, how draining it was. adam joked about that sounding familiar, he remembers med school well enough when he was single, he couldn't imagine it with a partner and a kid.
the two of them were standing together, watching the kid be carted away, both biting their cheeks and clenching their fists. hen whispered something to buck and patted his back.
"i know, it's just- god, that was brutal." buck wipes his face.
"that's why we look out for each other." hen squeezes his arm and walks away.
"does he have anyone to look out for him?" buck says to himself
interesting, he doesn't know the full story- just that that kid looked like he was in a hell of a lot of pain. and judging by the rainbow bracelet around his wrist, he's guessing he knows why.
he's about to work himself up to go talk to him. there's something about his eyes, wide and sad and so deep in thought he wonders how he pulls himself out.
they lock eyes again. adam gives him a tiny wave and an awkward smile. buck looks like he's been caught with his hand in the cookie jar and returns the nicety before bolting out the door. hen notices and looks back, processing something in her head. she smiles but it doesn't quite reach her eyes.
then buck shows up at the hospital later in his civvies, rubbing his hands together.
"hey!" adam says just a little too loudly, cringing.
buck jumps a little, like a scared deer, adam absolutely does not think it's the cutest thing in the world.
"uh, h-hi." buck is still whining his hands together.
"adam! sorry, i don't know if i ever gave you my name or if you remember-"
"i do." buck smiles, "yeah, i remember."
"good." and then he just stands like an idiot for reasons he cannot grasp before remembering he should probably speak now, "are you visiting someone?"
"do you remember that kid from earlier? the one had the um-"
"the kid that got hate-crimed? yeah i remember. he's stable now. he had a rough night, but he'll pull through."
buck visibly releases a weight off himself, "oh, good. i just wanted to check in on him. i don't know, it was a rough call, it was driving me crazy not knowing."
adam put down his clipboard, nodding, "yeah, i mean, that stuff definitely hits home for me, for sure."
"it doesn't for me," buck says and oh, shit, i guess he's not queer, fuck did i read this wrong, "i mean! like- when i came out, i had so many people that cared about me. my sister, my-well- my dad, my best friend, my boyf-" buck cuts himself off and deflates again, "sorry. i just hated the idea that he didn't have that, you know?"
"no, i get it, don't apologize. that's-thats really sweet. visiting hours are almost over but i can see if he's up for it, okay?"
bucks nods, and maybe adam is a fool with a dumb little crush but he swears he blushes a little. he feels his heart bursting a little about it. he came back to this kid, felt the need to check in and ask about him, because he didn't have something that he did.
"pull it together," he whispers to himself as he walks away.
buck keeps coming back, too. visiting the kid as often as possible, playing cards, and giving him fun facts from some documentaries he's watched. adam perks up whenever he hears one that he's watched. he lets it slip that he watched the same one, went on the same wikipedia binge. buck does that smile softly and look away like you're about to throw thing he does. adam occasionally joins in on the conversation whenever he gets a free moment. and then eventually, the kid gets discharged and buck is there to see him off. it turns out he has an aunt out in texas that's far more accepting than his folks here. he swears he sees buck tear up a little as he walks out the door, waving back at both of them.
and adam fully expects buck to go back to being a first responder he sees a few times a week and exchanging awkward, stolen glances.
but he doesn't stop coming. buck shows up the next day with two coffees in his hand. adam waves at him and buck breathes like he's psyching himself up and walks over.
"you said you liked chai lattes, so, um, i figured-i figured you would-"
"thanks!" adam decides to put him out of his misery, "are you visiting someone?"
buck ducks his head and scratches his neck, his smile looking less tortured, "hopefully, if you were free, you."
"i was about to go on my first break, if you wanted to go for a bit of a walk." adam suggests.
"that sounds great." buck clears his throat.
"great, gimme just a second, alright?" he walks away and hears buck mutter what he thinks, "i used to be better at this."
a few weeks pass by like that. buck hovering just on the outskirts of his life, very careful not to step too far in, but still present in a way that drives him crazy. he can't stop thinking about him but he only gets him for fifteen minutes now.
"do you wanna go out for dinner sometime?" adam asks, trying to sound as casual as possible.
buck gasps, like audibly, like a woman fainting after meeting the beatles, "i-uh, i should probably get back, sorry."
oh, he watches him go. and then stop in his tracks. and then turn back around, "can i get your number actually? or instagram or something?"
trying to contain his excitement, he nods, because of course he nods. when a hot, sweet as fuck, puppy dog eyed firefighter offers you their phone number, it's a crime to say no.
eventually, they do end up on a date- or at least he thinks it's a date. he can't be sure. the wine certainly feels date-eske but he really can't be sure because buck is barely looking at him in the eyes. he picked his very best "possibly a date" outfit and went in with low expectations for anything other than a really pleasant, really awkward evening. he decides though that if he gets to spend it with buck, it feels worth the awkward tension. especially because sometimes, he can coax him out of it and he looks so- vulnerable, an open wound. he's like a starry sky that hides behind a cloudy night.
adam doesn't remember what he says but eventually they start talking about things that should probably be save for the 40th date, not the maybe, jury's still out first.
but adam definitely knows he says, "you seem like you've been hurt." because the moment he does, he wants to punch himself in the face after buck gets this horrified expression like adam just said he likes kicking dogs in his spare time.
then, the moment passes, and he clicks his tongue, "i used to be better at hiding it."
"it seems like maybe it's a good thing you don't."
buck shakes his head, "i also used to be better at this," he gestures between them, "dating, flirting, having a crush," which does get buck to smile and adam gets to see that twinkle in his eyes again.
"oh okay, so this is a date, noted. and- you're not terrible at it, it's pretty adorable, actually. and i'm hardly one to judge. i'm very familiar with hurt."
buck keeps smiling, "well, my hurt is a 40 year old firefighter-pilot who broke up with me a year ago, so- i don't know how familiar you are with that kind of hurt."
"oh, i am all too familiar with that kind of hurt. does this hurt have a name?"
buck sucks in a breath, adam gets the sense that he hasn't said it in a while, "tommy. tommy kinard."
adam feels like buck is cracked open right now, "are you not ready to move on yet? cause, i'm okay with just being friends!"
"i really don't want to."
"be friends? damn, okay-"
buck puts on a hand on his for a second and adam's heart flutters, "no, i don't want to be just friends. tommy was- well, i loved him. i mean, i-"
"still do?"
"god, i'm really cursed to fuck up first dates, aren't i?"
"it's okay. i mean, i like you. i've liked you for a while, you know? and i've had my own tommy, the one that got away, one i'll never stop loving. i think-" it hurts to think about but he knows it would hurt more to forget about it, "i think what our tommys have in common is that we never let them go, or stop loving them, but we-" he sighs, thinking about his own heartbreak, his own first love, his own missed connection, "we take the love we have for them and we can let it grow into love for others too."
bucks bites his cheek. adam briefly wonders if the inside of his mouth is scarred of all the biting, "i guess i'm scared of giving him up. like if i stop thinking about it or if i like someone else, he'll disappear and everything we had will just- vanish," he chokes out.
adam hums, "it won't. that's the great thing about tommys, right? they stay with you, you never stop feeling that love. you just- build on it and give it to the next person."
buck has tears in his eyes now, adam thinks he might too, but god he's looking at such a beautiful man, with such a big heart and he can't help but thank whoever tommy is for giving him so much love that he's overflowing with it.
"sorry-"
"don't apologize, this got heavy really quick and we're only half way through the bottle of wine," they both laugh into their glasses.
"i guess i'm a little- hurt, like you said."
"i'm a nurse, buck, i kind of specialize in hurt. and if you're willing to try, i'd like another date, one that i actually know is a date beforehand."
buck really does blush this time, "i can do that."
buck leans in and kisses him on the cheek on the way out, oh god, he's a gentleman too, i'm so screwed.
down the line, when they're celebrating their engagement in the same park they used to walk through on adam's breaks, he thinks to himself, not for the first time, oh, tommy kinard, wherever you are, whoever you're with, thank you for loving our man, and thank you for letting me love him just as much.
#okay i accidentally worked through a lot of my feelings for tommy during this lol#this was also not supposed to be this long#i got slightly carried away#i also cried a lot while writing the tommy part#tommy i love you so much and while i think the writing was dumb if buck ends up with someone else thank you for loving him the way you did.#i think in this universe tommy is with sal. in my head. and buck and tommy meet up later and talk about how important they were#how they'll never stop loving each other#and adam loves tommy too#i've been thinking about adam since before buck and tommy lol he's evolved since then#at first he looked a lot like christian keyes cause i was watching legends of tomorrow. but now i'm watching roswell nm and i imagined#michael for some parts of this for some reason#so which ever floats your boat i suppose#evan buckley#legit i put it all under the read bc i do understand if ppl are feeling fragile about it and dont wanna see buck moving on
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Born Too Late - Chapter 4
pairing/au: neighbor!joel x reader // no outbreak
Warnings: MDNI, SMUT. FILTHY SMUT. dirty talk, unprotected p in v (be smart yall, wrap it up) age gap, no use of y/n, i think thats all idk let me know if i missed anything xoxo.
Summary: All you wanted to do was thank Joel, and apologize for the bar mishap. How the hell did we get here? (1.3k+)
a/n: i am SO sorry it took so long to get this chapter out. its my first time writing smut and i was so nervous :P. also been super busy with midterms and work and whatnot. If you have any suggestions, as always let me know. i love to see/hear feedback :) <3
You’re trying to take in Joels room but you can't focus. You can't focus because he's tearing your clothes off your body. His lips are tracing your neck and his teeth nipping your ears. “Come on babygirl, we ain't got all day.” He says in between bites. All you can let out is a moan. He slings you onto the bed and your body goes numb. Your clothes have been strewn throughout the room and you can feel him. “Joel please. I need you” you moan. “You’re gonna get me. All of me.” He throws his face in between your legs and laps up the juice in between your folds. You grab his hair like you're holding on for dear life and let out a moan so loud that the neighbors probably heard. He doesn't stop. You’re seeing white. “Joel I’m so close, please dont st-” and before you can finish, he’s ramming is cock into you. You scream with pleasure. “You’re so fuckin tight baby. Takin’ my cock so fuckin’ well.” His left hand is holding himself up and his right is rubbing your clit. You literally can’t breathe. He’s ramming into you, over and over. And suddenly it stops. He’s gone. You see stars, and scream in agony. Feeling so fucking empty that it hurts. His tongue begins tracing a line from your stomach to your nipples. The sensation brings you back to reality and you look him straight in the eyes. They’re dark and full of lust, and hunger. He crashes his lips into yours, and his tongue swirls around your mouth. You moan with pleasure, happy to let him have all of you. “Baby I'm gonna come. But not before you.” He spits out, effortlessly. He throws his cock back into you, letting out a groan. He picks up speed, slamming in and out of you over and over, rubbing your clit. You’re seeing white all over again. “Joel, please don't stop.” You manage to say. Your breathing intensifies and you reach your climax. You’re screaming, borderline crying because the sensation is almost too much. “Where do you want me babygirl?” Joel says, still ramming his cock in and out of you. “In me. I'm on the pill.. FUCK!” You scream, barely able to get the words out. Your body is drowning in pleasure and overload. “Fuck baby” Joel moans. “You take me so good. Such a good girl.” You can feel his cock throb inside you as he slows down, releasing his seed. He slowly pulls out and you whimper. You feel empty. “Don’t move. I'll be right back” You can barely open your eyes. You hear the sink turn on, and then off. Joel comes back with a warm washcloth and begins to clean you up. “So beautiful,” He says, cleaning you off. He throws the washcloth back into the bathroom and leaves a trail of kisses up to your forehead. He falls beside you on the bed, & you’ve finally come down from the euphoric high. You look him in the eyes to make sure you arent fucking dreaming. His eyes look different, they’re soft and warm. He kisses you, this time its gentle and smooth. You can feel his body loosen with every second the kiss lingers on. He pulls you in close and begins to drift into a light but still there slumber.
And then it hits you. You fucked someone you barely know. And not only did you fuck someone you barely know, you fucked someone you barely know that happens to be your mean grouchy neighbor, that is also the dad to one of your students. You jump out of bed, startling Joel awake. “Where are you going baby? I was-” but you cut him off, throwing your sweatshirt and shorts back on. Not even worried about your shoes or bra. “I’ve gotta go” You basically run out the door, and straight into your house, slamming your door behind you. You fall to the floor with your face in your hands. “What have I done?” you mutter. Not expecting a response, you jump when you hear Penny say “Girl what the fuck are you talking about? And why do you look like you’ve been hit by a bus?” Looking up you see Penny rubbing her eyes. “I fucked Joel” you mumble. “Huh?” Penny says, sliding down the wall beside you. “I said, I fucked Joel.” Its silent for a second, you’re scared to look up. “You WHAT?! Holy shit bitch!!! Tell me everything!! I've gotta pack but I can multitask.”
“I mean it wasn't bad” you say, trying to spare Penny the details. “Yeah yeah but how did that even happen?!” Penny exclaims, zipping her hygiene bag. You let out a sigh. “I went over to take him some Im sorry / Thank you muffins and it just kinda did.” “Yellow, I love you but sex with the grumpy hot neighbor doesn't just happen” Yellow. You remember him calling you that, how the fuck does he know about that? “Penny it literally just happened. He brought up the window thing and it kinda just escalated.” She looks at you, one eyebrow cocked. “Okay so honestly, was it bad? Like I can't think of why else we’re beating around the bush here.” “That's the problem, it wasn’t bad. It was mind blowing.” You pause “It was so good that I'd do it again.” “Why don't you?! I mean, that's as convenient as it gets.” Penny says, giggling. “His daughter is in my class. That's a huge boundary I don't want to cross, especially in my first year of teaching.” You say, sounding a little defeated. Because let's face it, the sex was great, and he's hot. And my god, the after care. Something you’d never had with Connor. You sigh. “Chin up girl, it’ll work itself out.” “Pen, you ready?” You yell out. “Coming!” She says. It's 3:30 and Penny's flight leaves at 5. She offered to get a cab but you told her no worries. “Where the fuck are my shoes?” you mumble to yourself. Then it hits you. Joel. Joel's room. Goddamnit. Penny comes down the hall, suitcase in one hand and her duffle in another. “Hold on Pen, I've gotta go grab my sandals. I left my shoes at Joels. You begin walking down the hall and you hear “Your vans? The ones on the porch?” You stop dead in your tracks. You step onto the porch and there they lay, with one of your muffins and a note that reads “Figured you’d need these this week. I had a great time this morning. I’d love to do it again, or get coffee. Whichever you prefer. Here's my number. -Joel.” “Fuckkkkk” You groan. Throwing the note in the house and the muffin in your mouth, you lock the door behind you and hop in the car. “Who was the note from?” “Joel” you mumble. “I don’t want to talk about it” You say, backing out of your driveway and peeling down the street. Too scared to look in the direction of his house.
Chapter 3 - Masterlist
#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller fic#last of us#neighbor joel x reader#neighbor joel#cliffhanger#joel miller smut#pedro pascal#joel miller x you#the last of us#neighbor!joel#joel x reader#daddy joel#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller x f!reader#my writing#tlou#joel tlou
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How do you think law would react to being a single father to a daughter?
✮LAW BEING A SINGLE FATHER SCENARIOˎˊ˗
NOTES: This was very intriguring lmao.
He's.. Scared you could say. He's a pirate and well you know he's scared especially since he's in the worst generation that they'll take his daughter Its a risk and in all honesty he doesn't know how he ended up with a kid. He's not the most emotional so he tries too make sure his daughter feels loved. He knows she won't go through what he went but he's still worried. He thinks his daughter reminds him of his baby sister. Makes sure too tuck her in and keep her close by at night even when she grows up. Overprotective. Makes sure the crew also keeps a close eye on you, agian he wouldn't want anything bad too happen. Deep inside he knows he should give her freedom but its all the shit happening thats keeping him from that. He sometimes asks for help from Corazon even though he doesn't see him or feel him he knows he can ask. He wouldn't allow his daughter too be with anyone either. He's not that strict surprisingly but strict on what his daughters allowed too do. Wouldn't want his daughter too turn into a pirate (he's going to be upset if she leaves to start a crew.) Even worse a marine. He couldn't bear to be fighting agianst his daughter. Theres a chance he may leave her in the orphanage when she is born because of all the stress or dangers. Whatever happens he'll make sure he keeps a close eye on her.
Short asf but I lost ideas srry 💔
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FILE : Arts and crafts
Your aren't one of the craft twins (DEPENDING) but you like arts and crafts !
its your favorite hobby.
But you know what else is your favorite ?
The shrimpiest of shrimps. SHRIMPO !!! (☆▽☆)
You both are . . Kinda friends ? So you decided to ask him if he wanted to do arts and crafts with you !
" Shrimpo ! There you are :D i've been looking everywhere for you. Even through the holes in your walls. " you say, Shrimpo knows your joking about the last part but if you actually did : he wouldn't be suprised at all.
" WHAT DO YOU WANT. " You tried getting closer to him, like Finn for example. And you succeeded, its just that he still often screams a lot. But at least your kinda there, He doesn't exactly just let people talk to him without him turning it into an argument just because he ' feels like it '.
" thank you for asking, Can you do arts and crafts with me ? I dont wanna always be alone while making . . I dont know, a origami frog ? "
" WHY. "
" because i want you to go with me and i love arts and crafts ? ? Im offended you asked. " You joke, faking offense at the last part.
" . . FINE. " no way its that easy. no way. You think, being suspicious of how quick he accepted. But nonetheless, you were excited and practically dragged him to the place you put all the supplies for making stuff in.
Also, wouldn't he normally say ' I HATE ARTS AND CRAFTS ' or something like that ? Suspicious . . . . (・ัω・ั)
Once you brought him to the table. You grabbed like- 6 sheets of paper.
6 sheets because you know he was gonna rage while drawing and crumple it.
you are prepared for war (ㆁωㆁ)
anywho. You ask him to draw something, and you give him a pencil.
" Shrimpo. This is the most focused you have EVER been for a drawing. " true. When has he ever had focus on drawing or even drawn before. I mean. Maybe he does, but you just never see him do it.
After he finishes the drawing, he shows you. his face kinda flushed, Its a drawing of you ! Kinda sweet. Wait. EVEN MORE SUSPICIOUS, WHY WOULD HE DRAW YOU. Even Rodger wouldn't crack this case 🙀
" IT LOOKS AS UGLY AS YOU. " he says. Yeah, you can't exactly just believe thats what hes thinking when hes flushed, gaze to the side, and the drawing looking exactly like you when the whole time he was drawing, he didn't even look at you.
so its safe to say, This shrimp likes you.
very very very obvious and very safe to say.
©m00nst4rd0ll do not repost, copy, translate or modify.
#mooniescreation#dandys world#dandys world x reader#shrimpo dandys world#x reader#shrimpo x reader#dw shrimpo
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ok ok ok. a post about josh, buck, and maddie at dispatch as promised. (and because i dont feel like writing a whole separate post or repeating myself etc, if im pointing something out as evidence for my autistic josh headcanon, it'll be in parenthesis like this) also this is long because im going basically line by line in some places so just be prepared for that and such.
the first thing i wanna say before anything else is that like... as far as how this conversation fits into the larger narrative, i was fairly disappointed, due to the way that including this scene like this is kinda implying that the racism was fine because of being closeted etc. HOWEVER. luckily for my sanity it is pretty clear that from a character perspective, that's not at all what's being said by josh himself here, and we can be pretty certain that he is not aware of tommy's past behaviors. in fact he has almost no facts or context about the situation, which i'll get into later.
now that the disclaimer is out of the way, im gonna move onto character analysis and will not be touching on what i think the narrative might have meant etc. any further. like this is going to be purely talking about character dynamics and dissecting the dialogue etc.
we start out right away by skipping all the exposition right into a hard cut of maddie reacting to the news that tommy and abby were engaged. LOVE this set up we get right into the important part quickly and we as the audience only have to hear information that is new to us, not the information being repeated back to the character for whom the information is new.
and oh maddie. i love you so bad. she's like DAMN thats crazy, and then makes the obvious turning people gay joke. her energy here is sooo like it didn't make sense until looking at it in retrospect, but she's shocked and invested yet not taking it very seriously as a concern for buck, because well, she's having a baby and this is objectively not that serious comparatively <3 but i do love that she sees buck's reaction and quickly reins it in and is like woah im kidding im not actually being homophobic holy smokes. which. it kinda still is a little. but i think she's allowed <3
and then... josh enters the scene. he apparently only walked in as buck was saying "-kissed a boy" so of course he had to be like huh? gay shit? something gay? boys?? what's going on over here? and i love that for him. and i love that maddie immediately is like oh hi bestie i catch u up to speed on the tea <3 the maddiejosh bestieism is so back we never lose <3 and that fact that she's like. feeding in the facts in a way to dramatically amp up the tale i love it. she really said man the things my baby brother gets himself caught up in are wild.... anyway <3 true sibling behavior is finding the perfect balance between being supportive and being so so annoying <3
and she is supportive still. like when it becomes clear that there's something deeper going on here she does try to help him work through it. and its so interesting to me the way she is sort of seriously contemplating his words and is shocked when josh not only speaks up but is being very serious and equally focused on the problem at hand. it's like... she's trying so hard to figure out how to help her brother with something she doesn't fully understand that having someone else speak up to help them kind of shocks her and boy does that say something about their lives and the buckley sibling dynamic!
side note, the way josh is jokingly like "she didn't bring her personal life to work, unlike SOME people" and maddie's little look of mock offense?? they're so cute i cant handle it.
i also really love how the shots are framed during this conversation. at first, even when she's not talking and is just listening to josh talk, maddie is still in frame, we're still getting her reaction, she's an active participant in what's going on. and then there is the one shot where she's talking and josh is out of frame, hidden by buck, because whatever reaction he might be having isn't important, it's a buckley sibling moment. (he's not an active participant at that point; he's entirely observing and reacting and gathering information, not dictating the direction of the conversation whatsoever.)
it's only when josh gets very serious and it starts to turn into a heart to heart moment just between him and buck that maddie is allowed to leave the frame. it still goes back to her in very brief cuts when her reaction is relevant, but she steps back out of focus and let's josh handle the conversation. and i love that so much. thank GOD someone else is helping buck sort out his problems that isn't his parentified sister or just generally someone more marginalized than him. it was kind of getting irritating to watch, as much as i love buck so much. like dude... the emotional labor. watch it.
and man. this conversation guys. everything about it makes me an insane crazy person. ive already mentioned this in the tags of some other posts but like... its so fascinating because on the surface it is such a cohesive conversation, but when you really break it down and analyze both of their expressions and body language alongside what they're saying, you can start to see the cracks in it. what one of them is saying is not what the other one is hearing, in both directions. they are having two different conversations and i think it's critical to analyze both of those conversations and how they are interacting with each other. what josh says, what josh hears, what buck says, and what buck hears are four entirely separate things happening alongside each other.
the first part is josh trying to get a sense for how serious this relationship is to buck. when buck falters at the question of "do you love him?", he elaborates with follow-up questions that, to josh, define "love" or close enough to it. answering "yes" to those questions is close enough to a "yes" to the question of "do you love him?".
(which. ok. the particular choice of questions makes me insane because they do essentially boil down to "do you prefer this person to solitude and grant them an equal or greater importance to yourself?" which is sooo... it's said from the point of view of someone who greatly values their solitude and would not easily grant someone that level of importance.)
unfortunately, well, buck is NOT someone who greatly values his solitude, and puts other people before himself quite easily. buck would answer "yes" to those questions for basically anyone. josh does not know or understand this about buck and takes buck's answers at face value, while buck is taking this as sort of... it's hard to explain, and i think others have done a better job of capturing buck's perspective already tbh. he's convincing himself that he loves tommy here because josh is unknowingly handing him that information and expectation, and buck loves to mold himself to fit an expectation etc.
and then comes the second part, which... i think this is where it is most critical to realize that josh has none of the context about tommy, abby, and buck and those respective relationships. by his own admission, he didn't really know much about abby or about her breakup with tommy beyond the fact that it was upsetting. he didn't hear the way tommy talked about abby to buck at dinner, and he definitely didn't get to see any of the real fallout and damage to her psyche that tommy leaving her caused.
but buck did! im not inclined to rewatch s1 to get any exact quotes or anything but from what i remember, she either outright said or implied that she was so heartbroken because tommy left her because of her mother's illness. buck is understandably very upset because he understands exactly what she went through and how, unless abby was lying to not out him, he didn't exactly come clean with the breakup, and left her feeling like it was her fault, like there was something wrong with her or she was being weighed down by caring for her mother. he calls tommy's behavior exactly what it is: dishonest and cruel.
but josh doesn't know this. all he is hearing is a young, freshly out bisexual calling a gay man "dishonest and cruel" for having been engaged to a woman for his own protection. and he responds exactly how you'd expect! he reminds him of queer history and the fact that he doesn't really have a right to judge the people who grew up and had to survive in a world that was much less safe to come out in.
(and i said in my other post that's still doing numbers that "pre-Glee/post-Glee" is an actual queer discourse talking point and makes sense that it'd be used here, as awkward and cheesy as it seems, but it's also a win for my television/film/popular media/hollywood culture/etc. as a special interest headcanon. <3 we love to see it)
and it kills me because of course buck is just going to take this at face value and decide he needs to stop feeling the discomfort he's feeling, leading to the subsequent doubling down and over committing that is typical of his unhealthy relationship patterns.
(and then at the end of the speech josh has to literally announce that he's leaving DSJFHJKDSKJ. because walking away/ending conversations is so awkward and difficult and the easiest way to mitigate that is to lean into the Dramatic Homosexual Stereotype mask or whatever <3 i've long been of the opinion that josh is someone who uses the behaviors associated with queer men and queer masculinity as the blueprint for his neurotypical mask, which is why he often comes across as being just a little bit off from the Funny and Bitchy Gay vibes that it seems like he's going for. and boy did his exit from this scene just reinforce that headcanon so hard!)
they wrap the scene with a little bit more levity too which is kind of nice to like. move on from that. because it got kind of heavy there for a second.
overall i do like what this scene accomplished, but like i said at the start, i think it has some really unfortunate implications that weigh it down for me. still, always nice to get more josh content, especially when it's pretty consistent with his character as established AND not at all related to doing his job. we got to see him and maddie being goofy and maddie being allowed to let someone else deal with buck's problems for a second. and the whole thing was very well shot! excellent camera work going on throughout.
i don't actually know how to end this post so yknow. im gonna make a dramatic exit now or whatever <3
#my posts#911 spoilers#911 meta#911 abc#911 season 8#911 season 8 spoilers#josh russo#maddie han#evan buck buckley#long post#media analysis#dispatch#anti bucktommy#i didnt go into bucks pov too much bc ive already seen a lot of good meta about that so i didnt feel i had much to add to the conversation#there were no serious meta/analysis breakdowns about josh's pov coming across my dash yet though so of course yall have to deal with mine <
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Being then in a pleasant frame of mind (from which I infer that poisoning is not always disagreeable in some stages of the process), I resolved to go to the play. It was Covent Garden Theatre that I chose; and there, from the back of a centre box, I saw Julius Caesar and the new Pantomime. To have all those noble Romans alive before me, and walking in and out for my entertainment, instead of being the stern taskmasters they had been at school, was a most novel and delightful effect. But the mingled reality and mystery of the whole show, the influence upon me of the poetry, the lights, the music, the company, the smooth stupendous changes of glittering and brilliant scenery, were so dazzling, and opened up such illimitable regions of delight, that when I came out into the rainy street, at twelve o'clock at night, I felt as if I had come from the clouds, where I had been leading a romantic life for ages, to a bawling, splashing, link-lighted, umbrella-struggling, hackney-coach-jostling, patten-clinking, muddy, miserable world.
David Copperfield by Charles Dickens, "Chapter 19: I Look About Me, and Make a Discovery"
#david copperfield experiences the magic of live theater!#diana rereads david copperfield#i was kicking and screaming when i read this paragraph#god i wish that were me#daisy has a taste for beauty!#this is me inside my deep and wonderful imagination in the year of our lord 2023#i do have to admit i feel like i kinda wanna memorize some of my favorite paragraphs as i reread. i dont know why#i havent PURPOSEFULLY tried to memorize any literature. poetry or prose. since i was a teenager#it was sort of a childish habit of mine. i felt it somehow made me closer to it#not that it doesn't. if thats how it makes you feel.#i guess it also used to be my desire to act/perform. which i dont do at all anymore. shut-in that i am#but ive been so deep in the books and the imagination lately i fancy im practically putting on shows for myself#i live in them now and ill make myself believe them. thats what ill do!#dickens#david copperfield#quotes#victorian literature#shakespeare#julius caesar
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I see a lot of people upset about William Kaplan being dead and no one mourning him cus Billy stole his body and I just don't see it that way. The kid in Wanda Vision is Billy Maximoff, The teenager at the Bar Mitzvah is William Kaplan, the Teen that got taken to the hospital after the wreck is neither and both Billy Maximoff and William Kaplan. That Teen went home with the abilities of Billy Maximoff, to the home of William Kaplan, with memories of neither and lived there for three years. He cares about Rebecca and Jeff, he lied to the to protect them from pain, they are his parents. He wants to find Tommy, he has magical powers, he wants to know who he is. All of these things are true. I wouldn't say William Kaplan is dead he just doesn't remember, like Agatha wasn't dead when he was Agnes, she just didn't remember.
#its fully possible the witches road will give Teen both his memories back cus thats the thing he's missing. making him not William Kaplan#and not Billy Maximoff but Billy Kaplan a mix of the two.#agatha all along#agatha harkness#billy kaplan#william kaplan#billy maximoff#and to all the people pissed that he isn't finding Wanda. womp womp this is about his brother and if you looked you would have seen that.#rumor has it Tommy will be in Vision Quest right? Tommy has to be set up somewhere! he doesn't have magic. and why would they bring back#THE SCARLETT WITCH in a marvel tv show? that's a huge moment they want that sucker for a movie.#marvel#jeff kaplan#rebecca kaplan#also for people up set e6 was billy focused.... yeah mcu projects have set ups for other projects.#even Moon Knight set up Wearwolf by knight. then She Hulk and spiderman had a set up for Daredevil. wandavision set up for Agatha All Along#and the Marvels. Mrs Marvel had a set up for The Marvels. thats kinda how the mcu works its a conected story#teen agatha all along#in the show it shows he doesn't actually remember tommy if he didn't he wouldn't have had to find Ralph. he was surprised wanda had twins#named billy and tommy and that one could read mind while the other was a speedster. all he knows about tommy is that he can feel him#and hes missing.#he probably doesn't know what tommy looks like or sounds like or acts all he know is he can feel him MIA and wants him back.#.........#im back. i also see people stiching that one scene with for lack of better term Teen looking in the mirror going I am William Kaplan and#taking it as Billy adjusting to the body hes in now. one even calling him the monster inhabiting Williams body. and i dont think that it.#he doesn't remember being Billy Maximoff OR William Kaplan. again calling him Teen. Teen is looking in the mirror at a body and face that is#completely alien to him because it is! he has amnesia. he's looking in a mirror with no idea who is looking at him not because hes Billy but#because its no one at that moment hes nothing. he has no idea who he is at all. all he know is thats his body his name is William and his#parents and worried and he know that cus he can read minds. thats it nothing else
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"Oh no, someone's attracted to the aesthetics of my -punk movement but doesn't know the praxis and history behind it like I do--"
OK. Tell them. Make it a teaching moment. Everyone who's in your movement learned the background from somewhere at some point, maybe this is that point for that person. Give them a jumping off point that they can dive into later.
"Oh but I shouldn't be responsible for teaching baby -punks about the history and the how-tos and--"
OK. Then don't tell them. You don't have to be responsible for teaching people with a budding interest in your group the ins and outs and how-tos. That's fair and valid! It can be a lot of work. Someone else will handle it
"But I'm annoyed that they would try to claim to be part of/be interested in my community without knowing all the details that I know after being in it for months/years/decades, they're dumb, they're posers, they're--"
OK. Then don't engage with them, if it's that bad. Maybe someone else will come around and tell them the history, maybe they'll pick it up on their own, maybe they'll just enjoy the fashion elements for awhile.
"But they shouldn't claim to be part of the -punk community if they don't know the--"
I feel like we have a few options here. People can either talk to them, share the history, share the values, share the praxis. Or they can just chase off anyone who even thinks about dipping a toe in their community, and then wonder why it's dying off later down the line.
I dunno, maybe I'm too naive and patient or whatever. But if people are entering your -punk spaces without knowing The Rundown of what you feel they need to know, maybe being nice about it and informing people instead of immediately assuming stupidity and malicious intent could help you make a new friend. Even the loudest voices in a space had to learn from somewhere, and not everyone has the luxury of being in the space as the History was Happening--whether it's an age thing or a not being aware of the space thing. Or maybe I just don't see what the big deal is behind people hating people who like the aesthetic of something and don't know the behind the scenes history about it yet.
Because I believe in the word 'yet.' No one comes into this world knowing everything about everything, and we're all constantly learning new things. I'm not gonna degrade someone and call them a poser for not knowing what I know. Because if it were me, interested in a scene but getting chased out and called a poser? I wouldn't hit the books and study up, I'd go 'that fuckin sucks, those people sucked' and then avoid anyone and anything having to do with it.
So chase people off and call them posers if you want. But if your community starts dwindling, don't be fucking shocked.
#out of queue#ani rambles#punks and posers#i cant even call this a 4am hot take because its 7pm but like#idk i keep seeing posts about like 'how DARE people think I bought my punk clothes how DARE they not know the how-tos and DIYs'#or 'ugh people only care about the ~aesthetics~ of my movement if you don't know shit get out of here' and like#maybe I'm just a shy ass introverted nerd whos scared of social rejection! but I avoid that shit like the plague#so if someone were to reject me based on not knowing about something I'd never even heard about? something i was JUST getting into?#there's a high chance I'd just scram and never look back. i don't wanna be the one who causes that emotion in someone else#granted this is coming from someone who STILL doesn't know how to make her own patches or worked up the courage to do direct action praxis#outside of offering neighbors to my tomatoes and trying to talk to people about what I'm passionate about#but still imo unless someone's a malicious intentional bad actor i dont see the point in scaring newbies off#thats how movements die imo#i know this is my solarpunk blog but its not a solarpunk specific thing#i think the main post that inspired this was about store-bought versus self-made spiked leather jackets#which honestly just feels petty to me but who knows.#might delete later
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Do you have anything you've been thinking on but just haven't made a post about it yet? Also I'm really enjoying your fic!
I have a few things but it's likely mostly headcanons that I consider somewhat disconnected from my analysis.
Curly's parents had him old, only child, died shortly after he graduated and got the pony express position. It was the last big thing they saw him do which is a reason he stayed for so long.
Doesn't admit how much their death affected him
Jimmy has a largish family. One of the cases of too many kids to keep tract of, parent never really noticed any of them nor their behaviors
Anya lived in a lot of houses growing up, regular supportive family that just struggled to support themselves.
Became a nurse largely to avoid their financial struggles but mostly because she felt too many people weren't being cared for and advocated for in the world properly
Swansea likes high top sneakers most. Likes how snug they fit and how they shield his ankles at work
Curly has a bit of a caffeine problem since he can’t sleep. Can occasionally be found wandering the ship at “night” when he had some too late or just couldn’t sleep.
Daisuke knows a little about a lot of things. Starts conversations with “did you know” a lot but please don’t ask him deeper questions
Curly has known Jimmy longer but has worked with Anya and Swansea longer, met them during his middle years, met Jimmy shortly before college.
Swansea rents a house, Daisuke’s family lives in a big nice apartment, Curly has a condo, Anya live in a small one bedroom apartment and Jimmy has a studio.
Curly's home is very disconcerting. It's too normal to a like uncanny degree.
Anya is ambidextrous but prefers her left.
Anya and Curly are both not native English speakers so occasionally they forget words and bond over the mutual mocking they get from the rest of the crew. Daisuke knows some Japanese but is still learning, never picked it up as a kid
Only Swansea and Daisuke know how to drive, Earth in my mind is very post capitalist so only older people and like the extremely wealthy can afford cars.
It's also like walkable just due to how many businesses are in your face. Probably strict living vs shopping districts
I have more but the way that I headcanon about them is like too long.
#im still trying to figure out voiceclaims like I think Curly is the most generic lost his accent his accent like swedish or eastern european#guy cause he was raised by old immigrants and anya never had a thick accent but she talks with the cadence of one shes like slavic and east#asian to me. Swansea at most is like irish or italian but just an old white guy and Jimmy just has a bit of olivish skin like hes just whit#i think people should make them all weirder too like I think Anya loves showing the fucked up diagrams and pictures from premed and everyon#has to nod and act super supportive and not horrified cause Anya thats a guy with his leg broken in seven places it is not facinating to th#rest of the crew but she loves it cause fyi to go to med school you have to pass pre-med she has a BA if not a BS in nursing or bio atleast#Swansea randomly talks about shoe politics and its like hes talking about regular politics. Curly doesn't sleep walk but he pauses at weird#times or places and will just stand leave and not tell anyone anything cause even he forgot#Jimmy is himself ig and Daisuke always has some media drama they are too old for to get invested in and teach them about youth slang Anya#kinda gets it#also i think people make Curly and Jimmy way too old? Like In my mind Curly is sorta his late 20s- early 30s like he's in the settling#part of his life hence the fear about settling here anya is likel mid 20s to 30 cause she at least finished college we dont have the years#of how long shes been working and maybe Jimmy is just a bit older and feels weird envy about missing that introspection Curly is having.#Daisuke is like 19-22 in my mind like hes an adult but a kid by their standards#like Curly was recruited and its much easier to get younger people plus getting someone young is a good investment like they either got him#right after school and its like all he's known and it scares him#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#swansea mouthwashing#daisuke mouthwashing#ask#anon
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THEY DON'T KNOW YOU LIKE I DO
#3hats au#me when i think about them as extremely doomed sifloop#they cared about each other so much to the point it turned to hatred. loop cares but is so so angry that stardust made the same mistak#loop hates this. hates him. how dare you steal my family. my identity. my feelings. my thoughts. AND now my own fate.#but weirdly enough it comes from caring so much. caring that this happened again. did they do something wrong? did they not do enough#for him? in their own loops?#and now there's nothing left for either of them. besides themselves. loop selfishly clings because thats all they have left in these loops.#but stardust is equally selfish. wants loop around because it doesn't want to make more life changing decisions. doesnt have energy to.#loop has lead for so long#why take it away? he can't do it any better anyway#this push and pull of wanting to stay with the other but not knowing if the other cares the same#holding onto the one thing you can keep. holding onto the one thing that's familiar.#but they're still mad at each other. still frustrated. and they fight more than necessary. they still hate each other. but care so much.#god#my art#isat#isat siffrin#isat loop#isat sifloop#sifloop#isat spoilers#in stars and time#in stars and time spoilers#in stars and time siffrin#in stars and time loop
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Still very wild to me when people try to gotcha Jason with the whole "if you can kill other people for being evil why can't they kill you" when jason is like. One of the most passively suicidal characters I've ever seen. What if man
#augh i dont want to cw this because im just talking about The Character and i feel bad when i do it for characters but i probably should#suicide mention#ask to tag#while im here i do absolutely believe hes been suicidal since jaybin times. maybe even before just in different ways. but like#going into that building with shelia? yeah#now. i DONT think he was aware of it and if youd ask him hed say no fully believing thats the truth#but like if a ghost jaybin had some introspection time i think he'd maybe eventually be like yeah#his outcomes to him were have a loving parent or die and hes a very big fan of ultimatums like that.#but he doesn't fully see it like that as jaybin because oh hes a hero and saving others when no one else can is what heros do :)#ramble. ivee been feeling it lately yknow how it is#ive once saw a post saying jason was planning to die after the joker was dead in utrh and yeagh i can see that#he puts A BOMB in his HELMET#suicidal characters in the context of hero stories are so fascinating to me. the self sacrifice.#the not caring about your own safety as long as you save someone else. the pushing yourself#the way itd be so easy to make it look like they just fell in battle. to be considered a hero in the end#anyway ive been glancing at suicidal jason todd fics. how bad is it that im still getting mad about characterization#because theyre not killing him right#AND ANOTHER THING. since im here and i try to avoid making posts about The Character like this so might as welk get it all out#think about suicidal jaybin as well as the fact 80s bruce very much considered suicidal people/people attempting like#weak and lazy? yells at them? i think thats about it. Very Much. je seems to straight up just hate them#again very much feel free to ask me to tag this one ^-^'#and i hope no one thinks im being callous here im very worried about that. i just its a very important part of his character to think about#and its fun to explore as someone who is passively suicidal myself#jason todd analysis#anyway no one look at me i am in my corner just rotating him#WAIT to clarify i dont think jaybin fully realized Just becauceof the heros sacrifice thing. i made it sound like that i believe#anyway. if you read him as suicidal since jaybin times and go to ditf with that lens like i did. well. the post death victim blaming..
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I'm having incoherent thoughts about clone danny again from the clone/clone^2 au (when am I not?) but more specifically I'm thinking about his reaction to finding out he's a clone. The standalone clone au digs into that a little more than clone^2, which is more focused on Danny and Damian's relationship. But neither (so far) really get into Danny's issues about finding out he's a clone after 15 years of thinking he wasn't.
Because he resents his parents for not telling him for so long. He resents the way he found out; through a trivial school project rather than a sit-down talk. He resents the fact that, apparently, they had meant to tell him sooner. But forgot. He resents the fact that they never told him because finding out feels like something was stolen from him when it had the chance to not be.
Danny Fenton, just fifteen, cloned not even half a year ago, knows what that personal violation of autonomy feels like. He knows what it's like to be cloned and while he loves Ellie, he does, she's his sister, and in this au his twin. But he is still left with that feeling of unsafety after realizing he'd been cloned. Being cloned is violating. The onset realization that it's so easy to get DNA without the other party noticing, and that what was stopping someone from trying to clone him again?
Followed only after with the rest of the inexplainable mix of feelings of being cloned, the rest of that inner conflict and panic that's an ugly mocktail of emotions that range from horror to fear. Trying to imagine what it's like to be cloned from the cloned party, and I imagine that it leaves you with the feeling of needing to crawl out of your own skin with discomfort.
And then he gets put on the other side of it. Danny Fenton, only fifteen, was cloned not even half a year ago, finding out he is a clone. And reactions, I imagine, can vary from person to person. But to him, it feels like something got stolen from him, like someone took a hole puncher and stuck it right into his chest and stole a chunk of himself from him.
It changes nothing about him and yet it changes everything. It's a betrayal on it's own to just find out he was a clone and they didn't tell him for fifteen years -- it shouldn't mean anything, because he's still Danny, and yet it means everything. It's him, it's him, it's about him. It's his personhood. It's about the fact that a load-bearing rock in his identity just crumbled beneath his feet and now there's a rockslide.
Because then he finds out that they used the wrong DNA. Its like pouring salt in an open wound. He's not even related to his parents or his sister, when for years he thought he was. It's the fact that pieces of his identity that he's been so secure in for so long just got ripped away from him in an instant. Then they tell him -- only through his own horrified prompting -- that the person whose DNA they used -- Bruce Wayne -- didn't even know he existed. That they accidentally used the wrong DNA, then didn't tell the person whose DNA they used.
The betrayal of being lied to for years turns really quickly into horror at his own existence. Something very similar to the horror he felt at being cloned and the skin-crawling discomfort that made him feel like his own skin wasn't really his. And then its not. It's actually not. Nothing but his own name feels like it belongs to him anymore -- not his hair, not his eyes, not his heart or his lungs, nothing feels like his anymore and he didn't know what that felt like until it was gone.
It's a question of Nature Vs. Nurture -- where does the line of "nature" begin and where does the line of "nurture" end? What of him is actually his? What of him is Bruce Wayne's? It's not logical, it's not supposed to be. It's a load-bearing wall on the house of his identity being destroyed and now everything else is caving down in on him. What belongs to Danny, what belongs to Bruce Wayne?
#dpxdc#dp x dc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc crossover#dpdc#clone^2#danny fenton is a clone#its a combination 'oh my god i've been cloned too i know how violating that feels holy fuck' empathy and also the horror of finding out tha#the things you knew about yourself that you thought were unchanging was all WRONG.#its the fact that tragedy is always one step away from comedy. they're twins for a reason. the humor of finding out you're a clone through#a silly school project and the *horror* of finding out you're a clone from a silly school project instead of a proper conversation#danny goes into his room after he's done talking to his parents and he vomits into the garbage can under his desk. utterly horrified#and he calls sam and tucker crying. it shouldn't change anything he knows this and yet it changes EVERYTHING. he doesn't feel like himself#he doesnt feel like himself any*more.* this might be cause for him to do a closet overhaul. something to make himself feel like he's#in control of himself again. piercings. temporary hair dye. *something* to feel like he's in control.#its no wonder why he never wants to tell bruce wayne he exists because he *knows* how violating that feels and he's *afraid.*#it makes him takinh in damian a little more remarkable bc it undoubtedly made#his identity issues worse. but thats a child and a child who needs help and danny is *kind*
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