#not only bc it’s lightening a situation that shouldn’t be lightened but also bc ppl won’t (and shouldn’t have to) get the joke

[strryhaze]

wait for what? i dont use twitter lol

so basically, in the summer, rumors about tension on the it ends with us set between blake lively and justin baldoni started circulating. most people online immediately took justin’s side, despite the fact that most of the crew, cast, and the author whose book was used to make the film distanced themselves from him. blake was made to look difficult while justin was painted as the one who had been wronged. there was a lot of vitriol and backlash thrown onto blake and her husband, ryan reynolds, who was accused of taking over the film justin had been directing, even though ryan only added a few bits of dialogue in one scene lol.

anyway, people sort of moved on, but then a couple of weeks ago, the new york times released an article where they stated that the real reason behind the tension between blake and justin was that he had not only been sexually harassing blake but also multiple female crew members. she sued him for that and for having planned a smear campaign against her in the endeavor to ruin her reputation so that no one would believe her. texts shown in the lawsuit between justin and a PR crisis team revealed this. some people have unfortunately still remained by justin’s side, but now blake is sort of regaining a bit of the credibility she had lost. people who have worked with her not only on that set but on others have come out in support, while justin was dropped by his management and has lost a lot of the support he previously had.

then a day or two ago, justin filed a lawsuit against the new york times for publishing the story in the first place and serving blake’s narrative. he tries to make it seem that the messages were taken out of context and also tries to paint blake as flirty and as if she encouraged his advances which is just … gross to say the least.

but to the point!

today, jack posted this about the situation:

personally, i think he was joking and not taking shit seriously online as he always does, but still. many people feel like this situation isn’t a laughing matter and i’m inclined to agree lol. i guess he fucked around and found out this time!

[deansoutros]

Black [M]

A/N: sorry it took so long for this one :( i’m sorry if it’s kind of shitty i rushed to finish this bc i had ppl asking for it :/ also fuck you chi

characters: dean x oc, zico x oc, crush, rome

genre: angst(ish?), university au

rated: m, alcoholism, stoners(lol), violence, (mentions of) abuse, sexual content(not in this ch)

CH1 CH2 

chapter 3: 

my mouth dropped slightly and I acted surprised but I knew she was going to say that. everyone had their mouths open in a small smile. I looked up at dean, his expression mirrored mine. sochi smiled proudly, pushing the black cup back to me.  

“drink up” she said. I didn’t know what to do. I was well aware that I was pretty drunk now and drinking from that cup would end me but I couldn’t kiss dean. he was perfectly sober. I knew I might not remember it later but he would. kissing him would make things awkward between us and that was the last thing we needed right now. if this had happened a week ago, I would��ve probably done it because he’s my best friend and the kiss would mean nothing more than a save from the cup but now, he knew something about me. he knew something that made us closer than before and I knew something about him. i couldn’t do it.

everyone looked at me waiting for me to either jump on dean or drink. I looked at dean one last time before sighing, taking the cup sochi had pushed toward me. she snickered in victory as I looked at the contents inside the cup.  I felt all eyes on me and as I brought the cup to my lips, it was taken out of my hands.

“you’re really drunk okay. I’m not letting you drink that.” dean set the cup on the table and crush immediately began laughing. everyone began chanting “kiss him” except for sochi. this had become more than she intended, everyone began pressuring me and I felt like I was about to burst. I grabbed the cup and quickly chugged. my perception of time was off but I counted the five seconds.

“that’s enough” zico ripped the cup from my hands and I wiped my mouth with my sleeve. I got up and set my own drink on the table. I was upset now.

“happy?!” I looked at sochi before storming out the front door.

“chae wait-“ zico followed me out and I heard the room behind me go silent.

I walked out to the lawn, and leaned against the wall with my head back. zico closed the door behind him and stood next to me with his hands in his pockets.

“you okay?” he didn’t look at me, instead he looked straight ahead. I didn’t reply, I still felt the burning sensation of the mixture of tequila, vodka, rum and wine coating my mouth, throat and slowly covering my stomach.

“here” he handed me a water bottle and I took it. I drank it until the taste layering over my tongue was washed out. my face felt warm and I could tell that the drink I just took would hit me soon. a trail of heat formed down my chest to my stomach and for a minute I felt like it would come up but I managed to contain it. we both stayed silent for a while, he waited for me to be ready to talk.

“you don’t need to be out here I just needed some air” I said.

“I want to be out here” he replied with no hesitation.

“you shouldn’t have drank that if you didn’t want to” he continued.

“I didn’t have an option”

“you did and you know you did”

“I didn’t want to kiss him zico, fuck off”

“but you did. listen, we all know there’s something there. we all see it. no one says anything because you both make it so…obvious. even when he was still dating heoyang, he would be with you more than with her. you don’t think we all see how much you care about each other? I don’t know if you both are really that stupid or if you’re pretending you are. you’re falling for each other in a very genuine way or else why would you even think about drinking? if I got that dare with nayeon I would kiss her because there’s nothing there. we aren’t compatible and we never will be. she’s a great friend and I love her to bits but not like that. a kiss would mean nothing, but you hesitated and I saw his face too. just like you, he wanted it but he didn’t want anything to be ruined because he cherishes you. you both know what’s really going on here and you’re scared of what will come after.”

“shut up! just shut up! you don’t know what you’re talking about okay. that’s my best friend not just some random person. would you kiss your best friend?!”

“I’d kiss dean if it saved me from that cup. fuck yeah” I groaned in response and hung my head down.

“I don’t like dean like that why does everyone think I do? I act with him the same way I act with you, so do I want to date you too now?!”

“no, you treat me like I’m your brother, a very handsome brother but nonetheless, a brother. you treat dean like, well like he’s your world. I’m probably exaggerating but why were you so sad all week? you were upset, why? because he wasn’t around.” he sighed. “I didn’t tell you this because I know he said it when he was drunk but, every time I called him he talked about you. if I was in his place all I would talk about is heoyang and how fucked up she was but he barely mentioned her. he talked about you. about how bad he felt calling you all those things, about how scared he was to apologize. you both just need to-“

“please stop, stop talking.” I felt so overwhelmed. I was barely able to stand anymore and I felt like zico had been screaming at me. I know he didn’t mean harm in his words at all but for some reason I began aching. while he was talking, I was trying so hard to convince myself that his words were lies. I was being bombarded with feelings I didn’t even know if dean had or not. I felt like everyone had been screaming at me about this except the one person I needed to. I began regretting even agreeing to this stupid night. I shouldn’t have drank or smoked, I know that when I’m intoxicated my emotions are amplified times a million and a situation that isn’t that big turns into life and death to me. it was so annoying that I was thinking this way but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stop thinking about it all.

“I like what I have with him, I don’t want anything to change. this is the first person I’ve ever opened up to.” before I knew it I had tears running down my cheeks. “why do you all keep pressuring me? have you ever thought that maybe just maybe if I liked dean I would have done something about it already? you all think you know everything and you don’t. stop assuming shit” I dropped the half-filled bottle of water and stumbled my way toward the parking lot. zico ran after me, grabbing my hand but I only fought with him.

“let me go zico!” I hollered. “I’m just going for a walk okay”

“you’re shitfaced, stop, you aren’t going anywhere chaeyeon” I tripped over the parking bumper and zico quickly tried to get me up but I refused. I dropped my face into my hands, tears pouring down my face for no reason besides the alcohol. I was no longer in control of my body, physically or emotionally. I kept repeating that I needed to throw up in between sobs. I felt zico hook his arms around me and pick me up. he carried me back to the boys place and everyone got up the second we went in.

“what the fuck is she okay?” christian examined me.

“chaeyeon-“ sochi seemed horrified and everyone came closer. I kept my hands covering my face and I felt zico tense up.

“everyone back up, don’t come near her it’s going to make it worse just give her some breathing space. I’m taking her to the bathroom okay? no one come in she’s fine she’s just really fucked up so give her some room.” zico held onto me before whispering to someone “where is he?”

“he got mad too, he went to his room” I could barely recognize crush’s voice. zico forced my arms around his neck and he carried me like a child. he took me to the bathroom and kicked dean’s door on the way there. once we were in the bathroom he set me down on the floor and I heard dean’s door swing open.

“what? who the fuck kicked the door?”

“dean, bathroom now” zico yelled. the familiar footsteps came closer and I couldn’t stop sobbing. zico leaned me against the toilet and I fought him until I saw the door open.

“what the fuck?!” dean rushed to me, brushing my hair out of my face. all I was thinking about was how disgusting I looked. I pushed him away and hid my face in zico’s chest. I felt so embarrassed.

“chaeyeon come here” dean grabbed my arm and I shoved him away again.

“zico get out”

“nah bro she needs help”

“get out I got it”

“dean-“

“would I let anything happen to her?” zico sighed and released me.

“if you need something call me over okay” he walked out and closed the door behind him.

dean instantly took his spot. he sat next to me, leaning against the tub and he pulled me onto his lap. I was still sobbing like I was 2 years old.

“hey, hey it’s okay, you’re okay. no need to cry. I’m right here chae.” my arms wrapped around his neck and I rested my head against his shoulder. he continued to brush my hair out of my face. I felt my eyes puffy and I knew they were red. I looked up at him and he grabbed his sleeve, wiping tears off my cheeks.

“you’re okay chae. it’s all right, breathe.”

“I’m sorry” I managed to mumble out.

“for what? you did nothing wrong babe”

“I’m a mess, I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. and I’m sorry to zico too” I was slightly more calm now, dean had been rubbing my back and it was soothing, his touch was soothing.

“zico would murder someone if you asked him to. as for me, you can make it up to me by doing my chemistry homework yeah?” his lips curled into that smile I loved so much and I tittered. he stroked my hair back, his eyes were practically glued on me. I gently hit his shoulder before hiding my face in the crook of his neck. my cheeks felt hot and I had suddenly felt self-conscious.

“stop looking at me”

“why? because you look like crap?” I looked up at him and tears began forming in my eyes again.

“no, no I was joking chae- I’m sorry I was trying to lighten up the mood” he reached across the toilet to grab some toilet paper and began wiping my nose.

“you look beautiful, you always do. the more I see you every day, the prettier you become. even right now, you look adorable”

“dean are you sober?” he nodded.

“you haven’t drank anything?” I persisted.

“besides two glasses of water, nope. what about you?” I let out a small chuckle, tightening my hold on him.

“did zico make you cry? should I punch him?” he asked.

“no no I just felt, overwhelmed. can I ask something?”

“what is it?” I closed my eyes and rested against his chest. I wasn’t thinking properly and I replayed zico’s words in my head.

“I don’t want to move” the tiny sober part inside me prohibited me from asking what I really intended.

“that isn’t a question, silly. if you want to stay here, we will. if you want to sleep here, I’ll be your pillow” god, he was being so adorable.

“can you carry me to bed? if I get up everything’s going to spin more than it is now” I mumbled sleepily.

DEAN’S POV

I stood up and bent down, linking my arms under hers. I picked her up and her arms draped around my neck whilst her legs did the same around my waist. she laid her cheek against my shoulder and I felt her hair cover my back. when we exited the bathroom, sochi noticed and rushed over, asking if she was okay. I nodded to reassure her.

“she just needs sleep, I’m going to put her to bed don’t worry” she hesitantly agreed. I could tell she was full of regret. I knew she probably thought she upset both chaeyeon and I, which she did but she didn’t know how chaeyeon would react, neither did I.

I kicked my bedroom door open, pulling the sheets back from my bed before setting her down. she was practically knocked out when I put her down. I pulled the sheets over her and she incoherently mumbled as I made my way out.

“what chae?”

“don’t go” I was barely able to make out her words.

“I’ll be right back okay, I’m going to grab some water for you” she hummed in response and I flicked the light off, leaving the door cracked.

as soon as I walked out, everyone stopped talking and looked at me.

“she okay man?” christian put his drink down and glanced at me.

“she’s okay, she just needs to sleep it off.” I turned to look at the girls, giving them a pressed smile. “don’t worry, she’s staying here, I’ll take the couch tonight and I’ll take care of her throughout the night.”

“thanks” sochi got up and made her way to the door, jisu and nayeon followed. “she tends to kick and hit in her sleep, just in case” the thought of her sleeping recklessly amused me. I could imagine her hitting sochi and denying it the next morning.  

sochi looked down and nayeon led her out. I took a look at everyone. they were all drunk, especially sochi and crush. as the girls exited I grabbed a bottle of water from the counter. the guys were picking up the cans and pizza boxes laying in the living room. I motioned zico to come.

“you should go with sochi, I have a feeling she’s going to be chaeyeon 2.0 in about 5 minutes. she had a lot to drink and she feels guilty. go with them” he turned to look at the girls. nayeon had her arms around sochi’s shoulders. she was slouchy and hung her head.

“yeah, you’re right. I’ll be back in the morning” he followed after the girls, grabbing his phone before walking out.

“I’m going to bed guys, night” a collective “goodnight” rang from their mouths. they all sounded dead and I could tell they were tired.

I carefully walked into the room, trying not to make any noise. I placed the water bottle on the nightstand next to my bed before grabbing a blanket from the closet and settling down on the couch across the room. just as I was about to fall asleep, a groan came from chaeyeon’s direction. I opened my eyes and saw her moving. I kept an eye on her to make sure she wouldn’t fall off but she began to breathe quicker and quicker, whining. she was probably having a nightmare.

I tossed the blanket off me and got up, gently shaking her.

“chae wake up it’s a dream” it took her a couple of minutes before she opened her eyes. her breathing was heavy and rapid.

“it’s okay you were dreaming. go back to sleep” she took a hold of my arm, tugging me to her.

“sleep with me” she murmured. she was still half asleep but she wouldn’t release my arm. I tried to relieve myself from her grip but she refused to let go. she began whining and I stopped struggling with her. she looked so childlike. her lips jutted out in a pout but her eyes remained closed. her fingers grasped around my wrist but her touch was gentle, so gentle I got goosebumps the more I thought about it. I gave in, pushing her to her side as I slid under the covers. I maintained my distance from her but she reached for my hand, draping my arm around her. I chuckled and she leaned into my chest. her arm coiled over my torso and she hugged me as if I was a plush.

I stroked her hair as I thought about what crush had told me earlier. after chaeyeon walked out earlier tonight, zico stopped me from going after her. I swear it was like all of them had planned this. I was upset that sochi would put her in such an unfair situation and to top it off zico refused to let me go out so I went to my room. crush had come in a couple of minutes later and basically lectured me. he may have girls around him all the time but when the man’s in love, he knows what he’s doing. in fact, he’s the reason I began dating heoyang. crush’s words rang in my head.

“listen bro, I don’t want to get too feely right now but I think this is it. I’m sure zico is telling her the same thing I’m telling you but you both need to come to terms. I personally do not think y’all are going to last in this awkward in between ground for long, then again, I’m not you and I really don’t know how you feel. from an outsider’s perspective, to be brutally honest, in the past almost two months, I’ve seen you happier. even with this heoyang bullshit happening. you’re probably just as oblivious as her if not more. at first, we all thought it was just both of you ignoring it and we slowly came to the realization that neither one of you actually recognizes what’s happening. dean, when was the last time you met a girl and didn’t hook up with her? even your relationship with heoyang began like that. y’all were fuck buddies and before her, you’d have a different girl here every weekend dude. we used to talk about girls all the time even when you had your girl, you’d still look at other chicks and we’d talk about them. ever since chaeyeon moved in next door you haven’t joined our conversations. you haven’t even glanced at another girl same goes for zico but that’s another story. for fucks sake, you spent more time with her than with heoyang. that relationship had fizzled long ago and we all knew it, it was just a matter of time. don’t tell me you felt anything towards her for the past couple of months because I know you didn’t. it was blatantly obvious that the relationship returned to its original purpose, just sex. I’m not going to try and pressure you into marrying chaeyeon or some shit, but I do think you should probably reanalyze your friendship with her. you’ve never had girl friends, dean you don’t form friendships with girls. haven’t you noticed? ask yourself why she’s not only your friend but dare I say best friend. you tell her more shit than you tell us anymore. why? if you really believe that there’s nothing underneath the surface, I’ll be the first to tell you that you’re stupid as fuck. I know you have those little thoughts about her. when she smiles you stare at her lips and you start smiling yourself without even realizing it. the weird part is, you’ve never…well, checked her out. you literally look at her in every way except sexually which is what throws me off but who knows. no shame in loving women and sex dude but you aren’t exactly the type of guy to skip out on looking at ass and tits. so why is chaeyeon different? let yourself fall dean, stop being so afraid man.”

god, I felt like he talked for fucking hours but every single word was floating around in my head. after he had left I began thinking about what he said and I have never felt so lost before. I never noticed half the shit he said. I realized that it was like we were both restraining from even allowing ourselves to acknowledge any type of feelings towards one another. I cherish chaeyeon and losing her is a legitimately terrifying thought. when best friends begin to get romantic it never ends well and that’s what stopped me more than anything else. I tried to convince myself that my feelings were originated from a broken place with heoyang and I but it wasn’t true. heoyang and I had been over long before the night of zico’s party. I hated how I was feeling. I have never been caught up on someone, not like this. don’t get me wrong, I did really love heoyang but this was so different and it scared me. but at the same time, I wanted to do as crush said and let things happen.

my train of thought soon drifted me into a slumber only to be woken up a few  hours later by a gust of wind being rushed out of me. my gasping for air woke chayeon up and the minute I looked at her, her eyebrows knit together with guilt.

“oh god, I’m so sorry. dean are you okay?” she rubbed my chest as I tried to regain a normal breathing pattern.

“fuck chaeyeon, when sochi said you kicked and hit I thought it was just reckless sleeping but you just punched me in the stomach”

“I’m so sorry, are you okay?” she sat up in bed and laid her hand over mine on my stomach. I pulled my hand away and extended my arm to the side.

“lay down”

CHAEYEON’S POV

I slowly laid back down, my head resting on his arm. I kept my hand against his stomach, gently rubbing it in circular motions. I felt so bad. first, I had bruised him up earlier and now I punched him in the stomach. what was next?

“I’m sorry”

“it’s fine stop apologizing, you just startled me, don’t worry. are you feeling better though?” he asked with a yawn following his question.

“yeah, I don’t think I’m completely sober but I feel a lot better. I can’t really remember what happened after I fell though. I just remember crying”

“you fell?!”

“yeah in the parking lot. I think zico picked me up” dean began twirling my hair between his fingers.

“you aren’t hurt though right?” I shook my head and he reached back into the infamous drawer.

“if you take some advil now you won’t feel as shitty in the morning and you’ll avoid the headache” he handed me a small red tablet and a water bottle. I sat up and swallowed the medication. dean’s arms immediately enveloped me and he dragged me back under the covers. my back pressed against his chest and his arm rested over my hip.

“is this okay or are you uncomfortable?” the fact that he was asking was beyond adorable. I placed my hand over his and glided my thumb over his knuckles.

“it’s fine”

silence filled the room and I closed my eyes, getting comfortable in his hold. he adjusted his chin upon my shoulder before sluggishly whispering in my ear.

“let’s do something tomorrow, just you and me. I can make you breakfast in a couple hours then we can go anywhere you want and we can have a nice dinner too”

the proximity of his lips to my ear made me shiver as I felt his words hitting the side of my neck. he noticed and pulled me closer into him. I swear I was sinking into him but his touch was so calming. I felt something I hadn’t felt in a while. I felt safe.

in that moment, I felt that it was just us. it was as if we were the only two people on earth. it was just us in bed, entangled in each other. I thought about zico’s words and how we were in this moment. “you don’t treat him like he’s your brother” he was right, I don’t. part of me wanted to just let things fall into place on their own and the other half just wanted to stay in this moment right here, exactly how we were already.

I stayed quiet for a moment and I could tell he began to get nervous.

“anywhere?” I felt a sleepy smile press against my neck and just that alone forced a simper on my own face.

“anywhere” he said.

“okay, deal” I mumbled before we both dozed off.

the next morning I woke up before him. zico caught me in the kitchen and we chatted a bit. I apologized for last night but I also talked to him about the little moment dean and I had at 4am last night.

“go for it. do it. you don’t have to date him right away. test the waters, go out have fun. why do you think he asked to spend the day with you? he probably made up his mind too. he’s letting things be. stop trying to well ,stop things from happening. he’s going with it so you should too. let yourself fall, he might just catch you”

“that was actually gross coming from you. I’ll think about it though” as zico was about to open his big ass mouth again, dean walked into the kitchen.

“think about what?” he asked as he rubbed his eyes.

“think about g-” I covered zico’s mouth with my palm, shoving him back.

“nothing! just g…going to the pier…today. yeah that” he glanced at me then back at zico, shrugging before going into the fridge. I shoved zico away and looked him in the eyes. say something and I’ll murder you with my own two hands. he got the message quickly, putting his hands up and backing away from me.

“what do you want for breakfast chae?” dean called.

“you” I head zico whisper.

“what did you say?” dean immediately looked up at zico, an amused half-smile crossed his lips. I was about 2 seconds away from tossing zico out the window.

“I said pancakes” zico looked at me, I was still slightly frozen but he knew those might be the last words he uttered. I nodded, reassuring him that I’d let this one slide, for now.  

I heard dean suppress a laugh as he walked up behind me, his fingers gently gripping my shoulders.

“are pancakes good? I’ll make them from scratch”

“that’s fine” I replied bluntly, my glare was still on zico, waiting for him to pull something out of his ass again.

“ignore him, he’s a dumbass” he said before pressing a kiss against my forehead and walking back to the fridge. zico raised his brows and so did I. it was unexpected. I knew my cheeks would flush soon and for once I didn’t try to stop it. zico had the stupidest smile on his lips as he walked into the living room. he may be a dumbass but he’s my brother…the dumbass.

I turned back, grabbing an assortment of fruits and chopping them up into a bowl. dean was so concentrated on cooking, he barely spoke. he looked so cute. when he concentrated, his tongue slipped out of his mouth a little and he bit his lip. I served two bowls of fruit and sat at the table, watching him try so hard to flip pancakes perfectly and laughing every time it splattered across the whole pan. just watching him made me happy. I could tell he was trying really hard to make this perfect and it was only breakfast.

“ok so they’re a little ugly but I promise they’re good!” he placed a plate with a stack of slightly overcooked pancakes before me. I chuckled, taking a few onto my plate and another three on his. we ate breakfast and discussed plans.

“after this we’ll go to the pier then we will have a nice dinner at one of the restaurants on the dock. so is it a date?” he said. the word date made my stomach tingle but god, this was such a cheesy idea. I didn’t want to be rude but this wasn’t exactly my idea of a good time. don’t get me wrong it’s cute and all but, not with him. he had always been someone I could be myself with and after thinking about what zico said, I decided to let things flow, but not if I had to act like I loved expensive ass food that would fill me up for 10 minutes. so I decided to stay true to myself and our friendship if this was really going to be a fair shot.

“no, it’s not” he stopped eating and looked worried. I could already tell that he was thinking I wasn’t up for our “date”. his expression made me laugh which only confused him more.

“dean, don’t you think we should do something more, I don’t know, us? I mean it’s cute and all but, we don’t really do that stuff. I say we go to the science museum downtown and be nerds, then we go have wings for dinner. I know it isn’t “cute” but…it’s us.” I pressed my lips together, looking down at my plate. I saw him smile out of the corner of my eye, exhaling semi-loud in relief. he kept his gaze on me for a minute before continuing his meal.

“okay, I heard they have the first nmr machine ever built. you’d probably like seeing stuff like that you nerd”

“what? really? what are we still doing here?! that machine is calling my name” he laughed at my stupid joke, pushing his plate aside.

“let’s go! go get ready and I’ll pick you up in an hour”

“pick me up? dean. I literally live 5 steps away from you”

“ok and? I can still pick you up, fuck” he reached over and ruffled my hair. I swatted his hands away, getting up and fighting back. it quickly turned into a playful fight. he grabbed a hold of my nose and I pulled his ear.

“y’all are gross” crush said as he walked in, not even looking at us. he looked like shit. he was probably second to most drunk last night since I took the main title. if it wasn’t for that advil at night I would probably be worse than him right now.

we stopped fighting and dean got up to flick his head. crush winced and before he could retaliate, dean grabbed my hand and ran off to his room, dragging me with him.

“you’re so mean you know his head probably hurts a lot” I said.

“yeah well he has a big head, it should be distributed well enough for it to not be that bad”

“you make no sense. dean shut up” he let himself fall onto the bed, pulling me with him. I landed on top of him and he caught me in his arms.

“make me” I swallowed noting but air like they do in the movies, realizing that it wasn’t an exaggeration when they do it. he stared at me, waiting for a response but I was frozen. I got myself together and got off him, collecting my things before heading to the door.

“I’ll text you in an hour” I forced an awkward smile and quickly left.

“chae-“

I closed the door behind me and almost ran out the front door. when I got home jisu was in the living room watching cartoons.

“woah, you look scared are you okay?”

“yeah I’m fine, just…” I debated whether or not I should tell her. this is something I would tell sochi but I was still a little mad that she initiated this. I bit my lip in thought before dropping my things and taking a seat next to jisu. she sat up and muted the tv.

“I think dean wanted to kiss me. that’s weird right? oh well okay actually I should tell you that I’m going to give it a shot with him. I’ll let things flow like zico said. I think he’s doing the same but no one has really said anything so it’s kind of awkward but right now I told him to shut up and he said “make me” like they do in movies and I swear he wanted to kiss me. maybe I’m being extra and he didn’t. I don’t know but for some reason I got really shy and you know I’m not shy with anyone in general. I don’t know it’s weird right? or am I weird for thinking that?”

she opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out. I raised my brows suggestively.

“so? are you gonna say anything?” I asked.

“what the fuck just came out of your mouth, you talked so fast I understood like two words”

I groaned and let myself fall back against the couch.

“ok ok it isn’t weird. doesn’t a kiss tell you if you really like someone or not? I don’t know much about relationships you know that. but if you don’t feel like you’re ready to kiss then don’t. be old fashioned grandma, no one’s judging”

“ok A) you are judging by calling me grandma. B) fuck off this is different. I hook up with guys all the time but this isn’t a guy. this is ugly ass noodle head dean. I don’t know why I got shy, it’s not like I don’t know him. even with hook up’s, there isn’t much kissing, haha”

“you’re nasty. take your time before you suck faces if that’s what you want”

“you couldn’t have said kiss instead? ugh, wait. why aren’t you surprised that I’m going to date dean?”

“because everyone knew it was going to happen soon and because you just said it, meaning you do plan on dating him which also means I win $150 when you do as long as it’s before winter break”

“what the fuck, did you bet? with who?!”

“nayeon, christian, sochi, zico, and crush…so everyone. we all agreed that y’all had feelings for each other but crush thought he was going to dump that bitch for you, sochi and zico thought you were going to date sometime next year, nayeon and christian said it wouldn’t happen because you both care too much about your friendship and I said before the semester ends. be a good friend and get me money” I grabbed a pillow from the couch and smacked her with it.

“I hate all of you, I’m going to go get ready to date him in 3 years so none of you fake asses benefit from it” I got up and went upstairs.

“so…is that a yes?” I heard her say behind me. I ignored her and went to my room. I took a shower and got ready. I slipped on a jean skirt that laid above my knees along with a white t shirt tucked into it. I took a little longer than usual to get ready but my makeup looked so good I had no regrets of making him wait longer.

Dean: ready?

Me: yeah, come “pick me up” babe 😩😩😔✊

I laughed at my own text, thinking about how the fuck we would ever be able to function as a couple. why was I thinking about us being a couple??

Dean: on my way now 😉

Dean: here

the consecutive messages made me chuckle. he was so stupid but it was so cute. I rushed downstairs and the moment I opened the door he was standing there with a small bag in his hand.

“you look cute, ready?” I ignored his comment and pointed at the bag.

“what’s that?” I asked.

“oh yeah,” he handed me the bag with tissue paper sticking out. “I asked zico to pick this up for me last night but I didn’t get the chance to give it you”

I pulled away the tissue and grabbed the item inside. it was a small box.

“dean, you didn’t have to get me anyth-“

“open it” he interrupted. his smile showed how proud he was of whatever was inside.

I opened the box to reveal a silver necklace with the molecular structure of dopamine at the heart of it. it was so beautiful and thoughtful. I swung my arms around his neck and hugged him tightly.

“I’m guessing you like it? let me put it on you” he gently pushed me off and took the necklace from my hand, turning me around and pushing my hair to the side. I lifted it up for him and he slipped the necklace around my neck. I turned back around and held onto the pendant laying on my neck.

“dean you really shouldn’t have”

“I wanted to,” he stepped closer to me, taking the pendant between his fingers. “do you know why I got it?” he asked.

“because you’re stupid” I replied. he smiled and shook his head.

“because you make me happy, so I wanted to give you happiness as well” in that moment I felt my heart speed up. i slipped my arms around him, my chest pressing against his, making sure he knew that it was beating like that because of him. his arms slid around my waist and he pulled me close, burying his head in my neck.

“thank you, I love it” I said.

“good” he replied, pressing a kiss against my cheek. my lips curled into a simper and I caught his hand in mine as he retracted from the hug.

“let’s go” he locked our fingers together and I swear I heard someone squeal followed by an “ow” but I didn’t really pay attention.  

the whole ride downtown he refused to let go of my hand despite me telling him that it was sweaty and gross. I didn’t feel awkward or weird. it felt normal. it felt right.

after an hour of walking around the museum, pointing out things we found interesting and even some stuff we had either used or learned about in class, we headed out the door. I bumped into someone on the sidewalk, or more like she bumped into me, she almost knocked me over. thankfully dean was still holding my hand and he caught me before my face met the pavement.

“are you okay chae-“ his face went blank instantaneously. it looked like he had seen a ghost.

“dean?” I traced his eyes and…fuck.

“so that’s why you didn’t call back yesterday…” she said.

I looked at dean and he was speechless. yesterday?

“what? your new toy doesn’t know that we hooked up every day last week?”

“shut up” he spat through gritted teeth. I felt numb, I didn’t know how to feel nor respond.

“hah, you should probably get over your ex properly before getting a new one” she said. her tone was cocky and it made me angry.

“get the fuck away from us heoyang” dean uttered. she took a step closer to me and dean tried to push me behind him but instead I pushed him away. she came closer and closer, before I knew it, all I saw was red.