#not my all-time fave but 'where is it written' gives me goosebumps

[tessasilverswan]

what if i say Betsy likes older musicals. Singing In The Rain. The Sound of Music. anything Barbra Streisand, Yentl in particular.

[balkanradfem]

Thank you to everyone who commented, replied or reblogged the list of their faves, this post became a valuable resource to me, and I go thru it often! Here are my new faves:

Leena Norms - She talks about climate change, but in the most encouraging, productive and uplifting way I've ever seen. She analyzes many aspects of life and how we could change them to consume less or in a less destructive way, what can we do to save life and the environment in the future, and she talks about books written by women! I find her videos uplifting and encouraging.

Gab Smolders - She streams video games, and my favourite videos of her are Nancy Drew streams, I have never in my life seen someone figure out Nancy Drew games so quickly, she will solve a puzzle I've agonized over for a week in 5 minutes. Also her vibe? So soothing and relaxing, brings so much joy to me!

Jenna Phipps - She sews, she crochets, she even made her own shoes from a kit! She has her own style of pastel colors and handmade clothing that I adore, and I also believe her to be a creative genius, because she will go and wing it and do patterns out of thin air and then the result is the most gorgeous dress you've ever seen. She also makes clothes so fast I can't even keep track of it.

Mia Maples - Okay, so, this is 70% comfort consumerist content, she buys clothes and brand stuff and tries them on, this is NOT my usual go-to content, but HEAR ME OUT. This woman.. has a good relationship with her mother, and I am here for it. Her mom appears in her videos to comment, help, be the target of her pranks, and to try stuff on! Her mom is the most positive, validating, uplifting, kind and funny person I've ever seen and I am comforted and delighted every time I see her. Also, Mia will post videos of her doing home renovation, teach you how to tile your kitchen, sewing, re-creating popular clothing and exposing brands sometimes! So I like to believe there's a balance (her vibe is so good I got sucked in after 1 video and keep making excuses. She looks like a princess in all of those gowns okay).

Izzzyzzz - She makes content about creepy old video games, old online games, doll collections, and any other creepy rabbit hole a little girl who is into horror would like, I found out so much lore about the old internet and old websites from her! Her voice is so soothing and her essays extremely enjoyable to watch.

Merphy Napier - She's a booktuber, but I love her for her One Piece videos. If you liked One Piece at any point in your life, you will absolutely love her analysis and commentary. She is the most passionate person who explains to me what actually happened in One Piece while giving me the life-saving criticism of all of the misogynistic bullshit happening in there. I was dying before I found her feeling that nobody would call that shit out. She also talks about fantasy books a lot!

Bailey Meyers - I originally adored her because she will read Goosebumps books to you, while adding her own hilarious commentary, but now also, I've discovered that she has a whole lot of Nancy Drew streams on twitch and that shit had me screaming in laughter, immediately addicted. Also she recently did a DND campaign with Jenny Nicholson so you can see Jenny if you watch it!

The Icing Artist - she makes, incredibly professional cakes, I've learned to make better looking cakes just by watching how she does it, but, tw her husband is in the videos, especially newer ones, so that is a bummer, but nevertheless, amazing cake art, if you wanna learn about cakes this is where it's at.

Ladies I need you to write me a list of your favourite female youtubers because I am struggling! I need women telling me things!

Mine are: 

Jess (Roots and Refuge farm aka all my gardening knowledge)

李子柒 Liziqi (separatist heaven, magical food growing and cooking)

STRANGE ÆONS (lesbian content)

Jenny Nicholson (fun analysis of media + themeparks)

Lindsay Ellis (in-depth analysis of media)

Melissa Norris (homesteading content)

I also like SarahZ, tiffanyferg, Karolina Żebrowska and Bernadette Banner but I need MORE and youtube algorythm is giving me NOTHING 

[lov3nerdstuff]

Hi Kay!

I just wanted to take a moment and say how deeply moving (and overall comforting) I find your writing to be! I've gone through almost the entirety of your masterlist twice in the past month alone and have found myself returning more often to the pieces of literature/poems your reference sometimes. (Especially that one poem by Benedict Smith! I've read a few more by him because of you and they're just wonderfully lovely 💛 so I'm eternally thankful to you for including it.)

I may be wrong in assuming, but I believe you may have studied/are currently studying a degree involving literature. I hope this isn't too foreward of me but I was wandering if you have any other works of literature that you'd recommend? (I'd love to read anything you recommend from poems to plays 💛) I'm slightly embaressed to say but the works I've read are quite limited to a highschool level and since I'm currently studying Pharmacy, there are very few people who can recommend me such moving works. :)

I also feel like I should apologise for writing such a large ask, so please accept this apology as well hehe 💕🥺

Sincerely,

Bek 🌻

Hey there Bek 💚💕✨

First of all... I'm incredibly sorry for how long it took me to reply to this ask, I know you sent it weeks ago and I'm honestly just ashamed of myself for only replying now! I've been taking a bit of a Tumblr break again, or rather a break from literally everything, and I guess not having written anything in a while made me feel guilty whenever I opened Tumblr, so... All I can say for myself really is that I'm sorry you had to wait so long! Again, I never ever ignore anyone, I promise! It just sometimes takes a while for me to reply 😅🙈

Now, I'm so happy to hear that you've been enjoying my writing! 🥺🥰 Hearing that it's comforting and inspiring to you is honestly such a relief and indeed does make me happy more than I can say 💚 It's so cool that you're checking up on all the references I make aaahhh 🥺🥺🥺 I love it 😁 You're always more than welcome, love! I don't think I could stop including references to literature, culture, history and the science around it even if I tried 😅☺️

And yeah, I did study classics and newer literature as a minor for my undergrad degree 😄 But tbh I still work with literally a lot even now (I'm in grad school for media and cultural studies) even though it's technically not something I've been properly taught ☺️ I'm just a nerd who likes to learn on her own, and with media and culture you can pretty much delve into almost anything you want 😂😅🤷🏻‍♀️

Now, it's not forward at all to ask me for literature recommendations! 😁😃 I truly love recommending stuff!!! I have a few up my sleeve, even though you've probably heard of a few already, for obvious reasons: A lot of what I truly enjoyed reading was something Tom Hiddleston has worked on in one way or another! It's truly a magnificent guideline for picking new literature... Just look up the literary origins of his films/shows/plays and you will be in for quality literature most of the time! I don't think I've ever mentioned it on here, but me reading High-Rise (JG Ballard) because I heard Tom would be partaking in the film adaptation was actually what sparked my love and passion for literature!!! Yep, it's that good. Now on to the recommendations though 😁(This... got rather long):

Plays

Anything by Harold Pinter really, but for obvious reasons you'll find a lot of additionally fun stuff for Betrayal, which is lovely and truly funny if you're in on the kind of humour btw

Medea by Euripides (a classic, but I love it nonetheless... You can find translations in almost every language) ((and pls stay away from Seneca's Medea, because ugh... Euripides is far better AND the og story, as much as anyone can say that for Greek mythology)

La Bohème by Puccini (I know, this is technically an opera, but if you read the libretto it's honestly just like a play... And if you're up for it, the og story is in prose and written by Henri Murger... It's better than the opera, but oftentimes more difficult to find) ((this one is hilarious and basically explains an entire cultural subgroup in the 19th century)

Faust by Goethe (many people hate it, but I LOVE this one!!! It's also been translated into any and every language, and it's so interesting philosophically!!! It's also referenced SO freaking often literally everywhere, and the operas and ballets based on it are always my fave) ((there's technically Faust I and Faust II, but you're good to go just reading the first one)

Anything by Shakespeare, obviously... Though I do love me my Hamlet like every other literature enthusiast (Yes, I can do that one famous soliloquy in act 3 scene 1 by heart as well...)

Poetry

Again, anything Shakespeare for the win, but I LOVE the sonnets and keep a copy of them with me most of the time (Yes, I own multiple copies of the sonnets...) ((My faves are 116 and 91, but there's always so much truth to be found in there!!!))

A lot of the stuff William Blake wrote is amazing, though you have to pick carefully with him if certain religious motives aren't your thing... I love The Tyger, which is an individual poem, and the collection of works called Tyger, Tyger which does have many good ones and a few ones that are a little more on the mediocre side

Do not go gentle into that good night by Dylan Thomas (I know this one by heart as well... It's beautiful, and there's a version of Hiddleston reading it on YouTube, which gives you even more goosebumps than the poem does anyway)

Invictus by William Ernest Henley (same for this one, also read by the one and only) ((I love to read this when I'm feeling down or powerless))

The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock by T. S. Eliot (This is another wow piece with many quotable lines and truths... I love it a lot and keep coming back to it! It's also a great example of how literary modernism tried to condense the complexity and passing of time and history into a single frame that had to be intrinsically poetical in nature... As in, this poem could've been a short story in any other period, but modernists loved to make everything a poem so here you go)

Der Zauberlehrling by Goethe (This one sucks in all English translations I’ve found, poetically speaking, but in German it’s such a fun piece! If you’ve ever seen the Disney ‘The Sorcerer’s Apprentice’ with Mickey Mouse or listened to the orchestral piece by Paul Dukas, then this poem proves very useful in truly understanding either! But again, the English translation should only be taken for informational value... The German one is also worded hilariously)

Prose

Short edited by Alan Ziegler (This is a collection of short prose forms that honestly is a must for me... I love this book to pieces and have had it for years now! It’s an international anthology, so you’ll find more and less famous authors from all around the world represented with short stories, prose poems, short essays and just curious and interesting snippets of writing! I draw a lot of inspiration from this book)

High-Rise by JG Ballard (As mentioned above, I owe this book part of my personality... I don’t think I would be the same person without having read it. It’s not necessarily full of wisdom, but if you’re interested in a different kind of portrayal of the human condition, then this is the read you need to take a look at)

The City of Dreaming Books by Walter Moers (This is another piece that changed my perception of literature, even though this is a more ordinary and ‘fun’-value read... It’s one of my favourite books and it’s endlessly entertaining! So if the classics are a bit heavy for you, this one is perfect for casual readers as well! Its value really does lie more in the realisation of how fun literature can be, and the freedom you have as an author... So really, I could recommend everything by Moers, his style is amazing both in the German original and in the English translation. Yes, I’ve read both.)

Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett (This is comedic gold, stylistic gold and generally a bloody perfect book. Also a ‘fun’-value read, but it also does a magnificent job at showing you what you can do with literature, and how well-developed characters are supposed to be written)

The Penguin Book of the Undead (Penguin Classics) edited by Scott G. Bruce (This book is basically an education on fifteen hundred years of supernatural encounters and how culture wrote, used and perceived them. You get introductory texts for different periods and social groups, explaining how and why ghost stories were written and used, followed by passages of the prime source texts (eg. ancient necromancy shown on The Odyssey). Really, this book is just for cultural history nerds)

The Earthquake in Chile by Kleist (This isn’t necessarily one of my faves, but it has helped me understand what studying literature and culture can do for you. In case anyone remembers my insistence in Wicked Game that you gotta know what a pomegranate symbolises... this novella is such an instance where this knowledge would prove useful. Generally, it gives many opportunities to think about privilege and circumstance)

The Symposium by Plato (You’ll probably not want to read the entire collection of speeches tbh... But the concepts introduced mainly here and in some of Plato’s other work are well worth looking into! For example, the ‘double being’ introduces a concept that in modern fiction is called soulmates... Just sayin’)

[drunkelfanastasia]

K-pop/khh 2018 favourites

I’ve already had several playlist posts here so I figured why not make a 2018 kpop/khh favourites one heh

They are in no particular order btw

Imfact – The Light

Track that made me stan Imfact completely and make them my second ultimate bias group. Honestly the best thing I’ve encountered in 2018 and I was lucky enough to see this one performed live.

Monsta X – Jealousy

My babes made a bop of 2018 once again huh? Sexy, powerful, aesthetical, with nice visuals, strong vocals and impactful choreography. Changkyun and Jooheon’s rap cured my acne tbh *whispers: jealousy baby jealousy*

Woodie Gochild – Muse (feat. Jay Park, Sik-K)

Another new artist coming into my life, thank god for Jay who finds all these gems like Woojae. The pigeon boi from SMTM6 became the light of my life with his crooked teeth and weird voice.

Sik-K – Fire

THE MOST POWERFUL SONG EVER MADE DON’T @ ME

I love how Minsik and bois from Groovy made most non-hiphop thing ever and nailed it anyways hdfhdjh

Drug Restaurant – 403

I love jamming out to this in the darkness with wine, that’s just the mood of the song.  Luring voice and the weirdest in the best way English lyrics, I stan!!

The Rose – Baby

STAN THE ROSE FFS Once again I had huge luck to see my babes live and let me tell you, this song sounds even better in person! This one gets The Most Iconic Drop award from me.

Big Bang – Flower Road

Is it emo hours already? Cause I miss my oldies goldies and their group music. Flower Road makes me think of summer and spending time in the countryside with your friends and running to the river.

Day6 – Headache

Listen, the theory about Day6 not having bad songs is not a theory, it’s a pure fact. It was so hard to choose on song from all their releases and I’m still battled between Headache and 121U because they both slap hard :/

Mino – Fiancé

This man is my king and I even have bleached brows/hair look inspired by him now, it’s no surprise I added his solo debut to the list. Again, his whole album is a huge bop, Rocket and UM are my faves apart from Fiancé.

Jung Jinwoo – She’s Got Everything

Artists from PLT released so many amazing tracks this year it’s insane! I realized I have three in here and I could’ve added even more sjhdjhf Jinwoo is so multitalented and underrated, it hurts.

Bloo – I’m The One

If you ever want to travel to another world while listening to someone’s voice – just open this link and get started with it. Heartbreak anthems from Daniel are nice but love anthems are even better.

ATEEZ – Treasure

Even if I’m a fan of funky and upbeat songs like Pirate King, Treasure still owns my heart being a little calmer and acing the vocals. Honestly, the MV is also extremely magical?? ATEEZ are a huge stanning material, don’t hesitate and become an Atiny.

kuzi – Badmind

Almost NO ONE knows who Kuzi is but I’m happy that I got to find out about him. He’s a nice young boy from Dickids and went by Hot Kuzi before and you should listen to his whole mixtape if you like hip-hop and trap.

PLT – Hocus Pocus

Another PLT track, are you even surprised? Hocus Pocus is something really precious to my heart as even my parents love it and it made me discover artists apart from my sweet Gaho.

Jay Park – V

The king has come to my list everybody! Such a lovey-dovey song this one is~~ Jaebum dropped bop after bop, Sexy 4Eva, Millions, one hundred features and he’s also a CEO? Get me a mans like him.

pH-1 – Cupid

*winking at @chaoticvamp * Harry is a precious baby and such a powerful musician, I’m shook. I remember not even looking at him at first bc I thought he isn’t worth my attention OH BOY WAS I WRONG sjdsjdhs Another song about love here… what’s wrong with me pls

South Club – Outcast

Listen, Taehyun was a huge mess after leaving Winner but look at him now! The punk spirit in his songs always inspires me to be myself.

Vinxen – How Do You Feel

A super emotional but calm track with intimate lyrics. TW for self-harm. It’s the best when you walk home in the evening and look around at people; start feeling like they don’t really exist and everything is a movie.

Snuper – Tulips

Started stanning this fab group after went to the Korean festival and saw them live, Snuper are xtremely underrated and even this comeback is not really popular even though the song is amazing and catchy L

NCT U – Boss

The country I live in, Ukraine had an honor to welcome NCT U into its arms where they filmed Boss and Baby Don’t Stop so it had a huge meaning to me + we also got introduced to Lucas and Jungwoo.

Got7 – Thank You

Yes I’m boasting about seeing another kpop group live again please excuse me I’m just happy—Anyways, I cried when they sang this song during the concert.

Ilhoon – She’s Gone

I WAS SO SHOCKED BY ILHOON DAMN BOI I didn’t really get into his album because other tracks didn’t get enough of my attention but She’s Gone called me her bitch, I’m a sucker for this badass song.

RM – Seoul

RM’s mixtape is a masterpiece in its best. I’ve never thought he’d produce something like that and its difference had me lured in quickly… Such a chill album that got goosebumps crawling down my spine, I fell in love with it and I’m honestly questioning my bias list after it.

Lee Sang – Repetition

My underrated babies Imfact are here one more time, this time with Sang and his self-written song that made my heart bleed. His beautiful vocals complete the mood of it so perfectly; it makes me miss someone who doesn’t exist.

Sam Kim – Make Up (feat. Crush)

Something that made the end of 2018 awesome for me is this collab and Sam Kim’s perfect voice. This has a catchy tune and it got stuck in my head for a while.

Villain – Manitto

My mom said that Villain is the coolest in PLT the first thing when she saw them all in one MV and told me he needs to be my favourite so here we are I guess hdfdfhfj I know I said it about lots of tracks before but that’s such a bop please give it a listen!!

Flowsik & Jessi – Wet

The most badass release of 2018? I think so. Jessi is a queen and a girl crush and just someone I look up to quite a lot, her rap is very well complimented by Flowsik and his raspy voice. (also Jessi is slapping bois butts in the MV, go watch it)

Dean – Instagram

Even though some fans were upset that that’s not Dean’s style I don’t agree. Dean’s style is whatever Dean decides to be his style, okay? Instagram is amazing and it has an amazing message to it.

Jonghyun – Take The Dive

The whole album was hard to listen to; I think we can all agree with it. Yet, it’s very beautiful and is always worth a listen when you feel like giving up. Our moon is always looking over us.

All these tracks are also in a YouTube playlist here :’)

[buttercookieart]

Disclaimer: I’m just a fan. Not a critic or a reporter, this is not my job.

Here’s the review, enjoy! 

This is the End and you can perceive it from the very first second. Forget Infinity War and its mood, this is a totally different ride.  It’s the end of a journey that began eleven years ago and it feels like it. You can see and feel all these years in just 3 hours. The Russos are bloody good at it, the shots, the sequences, everything is a masterpiece.  There’s hope, there are funny scenes and jokes, but what sets the mood it’s the grieving. We see the Avengers grieve and blame themselves for what happened, this is what fuels them and keeps them going. This is also one of the flaws of the movie: we see their pain, but the movie doesn’t show us how ordinary people are coping -except for one scene, maybe. I think that if we could’ve got a glimpse at what ordinary people did to survive we could’ve appreciated this movie even more. This movie is a love letter to the original six, from the first to the last second. Even the mid-credits are for and about them. Ans so it should be. This journey was possible because of them and I’ll be forever grateful. It just ended, this is -was, if you’ve already seen it- the end. That’s why there is no post-credit scene, not because there won’t be new adventures, but because there is nothing left to say. It’s the ending and the beginning.  I’ve got emotional plenty of times because of it and in the end my tissues weren’t enough. This movie is the cherry on top of a story that kept company to more than one generation. From six years olds, now teenagers; to adults; passing through young adults now adults. The Russo bros were able to direct something that at some points was spectacular, with a narration flow not always perfect but very effective. Like any other movie, even Endgame has its flaws. Some characters were written kinda badly, one in particular for my taste. Of course, with all those characters it was impossible not to make mistakes.  I’ve seen people complain about plot holes, to be honest, except for a couple of things -of which one only time can give me an answer- there aren’t really any. I mean, if you rewind the movie in your head you’ll notice it’s not a hole at all. Everything is explained so well during the course of action, that there’s no need to reiterate over it. The first hour it’s the one that maybe feels a little bit slower than the other two. It’s not my case because when lights were switched on for the short break I was almost complaining. During the first hour you’ll see most of the characters development and the reasons and whys behind what they’re doing. It was impossible not to get invested. The last two hours were the ones that brought all the people in the theatre together. There were scenes in which we laughed, gasped, made some standing ovations and, of course, cried. And when I say “cried”, what I mean is: the only things you could hear were the movie and the people sobbing. I swear I’m not being dramatic, I’ve heard grown up men cry alongside my friends and I and it was beautiful. Sorta. You’ll understand when you’ll see it yourself.  To end this non-spoiler part, it’s a very emotional movie. Heart beats fast most of the time, you’ll wish you were dead but you’ll enjoy it in the end. ... Or so I hope!

                                     Spoilers under the cut!

I really don’t know where to start. It was a rollercoaster start to finish. My brain was so caught up that last night I dreamt I was still in the theatre watching 29 more minutes of it. 29 minutes that included the dead forever back among the living. Quill got back his Gamora, Clint his best friend, Thor and I, our fave trickster, the whole world got back their belove Tony. 

I loved how they got back in time but at their own conditions, it was no Back to the future, but I’d lie if I didn’t like the references to no end. 

Thor is that one character I didn’t like. He was... not him. Thank god Rocket was there to slap him. 

Cap Falcon!!! (but I would love Bucky wearing the stars and stripes even for five minutes only)

He’s worthy. We been knew, no big deal... But guys how powerful that move was bloody hell!

The Winter Soldier elevator scene but with “Hail Hydra”

Steve getting to know how annoying he can be

jARVIS OH MY GOD I ALMOST SCREAMED

Tony and Steve casually walking to the most important people in their life in 1970.

Tony and Morgan and we deserved more of them

Avengers ASSEMBLE!

Steve and Peggy they finally got their happily ever after, it doesn’t make much sense but who the hell cares when you know they’re probably Tony’s godparents??

Peter is unable to have uncles

I’m mad at Carol because she could’ve saved Tony if only she was on time. But I guess Captains like to be late

Pepper assuring Tony her and Morgan were going to be okay

Morgan has two godfathers, no way Tony chose between Happy and Rhodey

ThE GIRLS standing ready to fuck the shit out of anyone who dared to get close to Carol. The goosebumps I got, oh boy

Frigga being the best mum

Steve calling Peter “Queens” it’s what gets me going

“Don’t do anything stupid until I get back” “How can I? You’re taking all the stupidity with you” I cried here too. Deep down I k n e w.

“Love you 3000″ what keeps me staring at the ceiling at night

And lastly, but I could go on and on for hours really, the phrase that started and ended this decade: I am Iron Man.

[stateofloveandnegan]

The Shy One - Eddie Vedder

Can I have an Eddie one where you work at the studio they're recording in, and Eddie constantly teases you in front of people and your really shy. And then one day he kinda traps you in a room/bathroom and has his wicked way 😂

I honestly have no idea how things work in studio’s, so I apologise in advance if it’s completely different from what I wrote down..

I’m really sorry if the last part sucks. I had it all written down and then Tumblr decided to crash. I’m sorry.. I hope you still like it :)

Requested by: anon

Warning(s): mentions of smut

“You’re serious?” Ellie asks with wide eyes.

“I am, why?”

“Pearl Jam, really?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Pearl fucking Jam?! You really serious?!”

“God damn Ellie, what are you on about?” I yell at her, frustrated by her behaviour.

Ellie seems to snap back to the real world bye my outburst and blinks a couple of times before speaking up again. “Sorry, I just can’t believe you’re actually gonna meet the guys. They’re so talented!”

“Yeah, they are. I’m probably not gonna really be around them that much, though. I just need to make sure everything planned well and stuff. I'm not needed in the actual recording room. I always sit by the small bar, making schedules and stuff.”

Ellie nods, “I know, but it’s still cool, isn’t it?”

“It is, they make great music.” I smile, finally understanding why she went loco earlier. Ellie’s a huge PJ fan and now I’m gonna meet them. It’s just really unfortunate that she can’t come inside. The only way you’ll get inside the studio is if you’re either the artist or if you work in the studio. Ellie does neither. I’ve got the privilege to work in the studio, thanks to my uncle. He used to own the studio and when he realised I’ve got a talent for making very good schedules, he asked me to work with him to make schedules for the artists.

Of course, I said yes immediately. I needed money and I actually liked the job he offered me. Not because I am horny for attention from famous people, most of the time I barely talk to the artists anyway, but because I like planning things. I like making things organised and planning out arrangements.

Ellie and I talk about work and other things for some time until I have to go to work. She tells me to call her later tonight to tell her about the boys and I laugh but tell her I’ll do it.

“There is my favourite niece!” Robert, my uncle, exclaims when I walk inside the studio.

I laugh, “I am your only niece, Rob.” 

“Still my fave.” he winks and gives me a hug when I reach him.

I put my things down only my desk afterwards and make some coffee for the both of us; it’s become some kind of tradition for me to do that.

“Excited to meet the ones behind Pearl Jam?” Rob asks when I hand him his cup of coffee. 

I nod, “I bet they’ll make even better music with you on their team.”

“Oh, (Y/N), you flatter me too much.” he says as if I just told him he’s the best producer in the world.

“Keep on dreaming, uncie.”

I go back to my desk to sort some things out. I start planning the next arrangements with Pearl Jam. It’s also my job to keep the e-mails updated. I notice there’s another band that wants to work in my uncle’s studio next year. I give him the good news and we share a piece of cake, which my aunt must’ve made earlier today, in celebration.

Time goes by and before I realise, the guys from Pearl Jam make their way inside to studio. My uncle greats them as if they’ve known each other for a lifetime and soon as they reach the bar area (in which my desk is also placed, in the back) he introduces me.

“This is my niece, (Y/N). She plans all the arrangements and stuff I’m no good in.” he adds playfully. 

All the guys introduce themselves and kindly shake my hand. It’s all nothing but kindness in their faces, though in Eddie’s face is also something else, mischievousness, maybe? 

Everyone soon disappears into the recording area and I’m left to do my work. Every now and then one of the guys, sometimes two, come in and ask for something to drink. It’s a second job I do, working behind the bar, since it’s no big deal. 

“So, you’ll be here more often, then?” the singer asks me while I hand him a glass of water.

I nod, “I work here full-time, so yeah. I’ll be here as much as you guys will be.”

“Good, that means I can see that pretty face of yours very much these upcoming weeks.” Eddie smirks and winks at me before going back into the recording area.

His comment leaves me flabbergasted and speechless. Did he really just flirt with me? Eddie Vedder? Flirting with me? (Y/N) (L/N)? Nope probably not. I’m just imagining things.

It’s not that I don’t believe it because I’ve got this huge crush on him and I think he’s too good for me, ‘cause I don’t. Really, he’s just another guy. I mean yeah, he’s an amazing singer and he’s got good looks, but that doesn’t make him any better of a man than others. It’s just that I never expected him to flirt with me, that’s why he left me speechless.

“Hey there, again.” a voice interrupts my concentration on the e-mails I was just reading. I look up to find Eddie standing in from of my desk with, once again, a smirk plastered on his face. I immediately feel myself go red and I look down again.

“What can I do for you, mr Vedder?” I say shyly.

“Oh dear, calling me ‘mr Vedder’ and all. Just call me Eddie please.. And I came here for a drink, can you help me with that, love?”

His tone was even more flirtatious than before and it actually caused some goosebumps to appear on my skin. I was very much intimidated by the guy and hearing him calling me ‘love’ was the right way to get me even more flustered than I already was.

“Oh- ehm, yeah sure- I mean of course..” I ramble and Eddie chuckles at my awkwardness.

I quickly get up and go behind the bar to pour him a glass of water, but he declines it and says “I could use something strong, dear. Do me a favour and pour me some of your best whiskey.”

Without saying anything, I do as I’m told and hand him a glass of whiskey, our fingers brushing slightly against each others and I can feel my face go even redder than before. Even though I’m not looking at him, I know Eddie’s smirking. He’s probably very much aware of the affect he’s having on me.

“Take drink yourself too, gorgeous. You deserve one.” he says and winks, before leaving again.

As soon as he’s left I put down my drink and run to get my phone. I dial Ellie’s number and when she answers I can’t stop talking.

“El you need to help me I- I don’t know what to do, Eddie keeps flirting with me and I can’t handle it and it’s getting on my nerves and I’m really about to break into tears ‘cause I don’t know what to do and you know how I am around guys and I just can’t-”

“Breath, (Y/N), breath!”

“How do I do that again?!”

“Don’t overreact! Just calm your mind. Count to ten with me.”

And so we did. After a minute or two Ellie has me calmed down. We talk about what happened and she helps me with a plan for me to survive the rest of the evening.

The plan works and without getting another panic attack, I make it through the night. Robert eventually sends me home when they’re almost done recording for the day. Fortunately I didn’t have to spend more alone time with Eddie than necessary.

But of course, today is another day and I will face Eddie again. It’s not that I don’t want to see him, it’s just that his presence makes me nervous, especially when he’s all flirty around me.

“Good morning guys, can I get you something to drink?” I ask the guys when they’re inside the next morning.

I receive some ‘good morning’s’ back and Stone and Mike tell me they’re in for a good cup of coffee. I make my way behind the bar and make them a good, strong, cup of coffee and hand it to them. During my every action, I can feel someone’s eyes boring into me and I don’t have to turn around to know whose eyes are on me. Eddie’s said nothing yet, he’s just been standing at the bar with his usual smirk on his face.

When I do turn, Eddie’s smirk increases and he decides it’s funny to play a game called ‘make (Y/N) as awkward as possible’. But before he can say anything I excuse myself to the bathroom. I’m known to make a fool of myself when I’m around guys that intimidate me and I’m not in the mood to make a fool of myself in front of my uncle and the other PJ guys. Enough is enough.

When I get back the guys are, fortunately, gone and into the recording area of the studio. Since there is nothing else to do, all the work from yesterday and today already being done, I decide to clean the studio a bit. All goes well until someone gets in the room, makes their way over to me and stops behind me.

“You’re really the full-package, aren’t you? Doing all the paper work, being a barmaid, and now, cleaning the studio.”

I don’t have to turn around to know who that voice belongs to. I try to hide my awkwardness and say “Can I help you?”

I turn around and see Eddie smirking, “Nope, not really.”

My confusion sends him in laughter, “What are you doing here then?” I ask, still remaining conifdent.

“Am I not allowed to be here?”

Yup, there it goes, my confidence, can you see it flying away? “Oh- ehm, yeah, of- of course..”

Eddie’s smirk increases when he notices I dropped my confidence and he takes a step closer. “You’re very easily flustered (Y/N).”

I can’t seem to focus on anything but him and I feel myself go as red as a tomato. Eddie takes another step closer and pushes a strand of hair behind my ear. Leaving his hand on my cheek and brushing it with his thumb.

I realise there’s no reason for me to act oblivious to his actions anymore. “Why are you doing this, Eddie?” I ask, scared as hell.

Eddie looks at me and for a second his smirk vanishes, “Because you’re gorgeous (Y/N), can’t you see? Also because you’re smart and kind and hard-working and talented. Those are definitely things that attract me.”

If I didn’t know any better I’d say he wasn’t just flirting, but he was actually genuine about it, but I push that thought aside when his smirk returns.

“And because your awkwardness is a big turn on, dear.”

My jaw drops as soon as that comment left his mouth and my eyes go wide. Never had someone been so bold and blunt. What the hell am I supposed to do?!

Eddie’s hand leaves my cheek and soon after, both his hands are resting on my sides. He tilts me up and puts me onto the table behind me. He opens my legs and stands inbetween them, pushing his body roughly against mine.

“Don’t worry dear, all will be alright. Just let me handle this, yeah?” he says and without knowing what I’m doing, I nod.

Eddie comes closer and closer and teases me, slightly brushing his lips against mine. I feel like I’m on cloud fucking nine, especially when he actually starts kissing me. He kisses me roughly, but passionately nonetheless. The kiss is filled with unleashed tension and it’s something I’ve never experienced before.

When we break apart I manage to get a quick “Aren’t you needed in the studio?” and he laughs, “No dear, they’re busy with the instruments. I told them I needed a break.” And he reconnects his lips with mine.

Everything got a bit heated and after 30 minutes I realise I just did something I never even thought would ever happen.

I look at Eddie, who is panting above me, and whisper “I can’t believe we just did it on my desk..”

Eddie chuckles, his badass behaviour long gone and replaced by genuine affection. “I can’t believe it either, but I did enjoy it very much.” He says and kisses me again.

I kiss him back, “Me too, Ed. Thank you.”

“No, (Y/N), thank you.” He winks and once again, Eddie has me flustered.

[manmarziiyan]

rate Aditi sharma, Surbhi C, and Asha Negi as actresses

Hi!

I don’t know whether you’re referring to Aditi Sharma from Kaleerein or Aditi Dev Sharma from Silsila Badalte Rishton Ka, but I’ll do both since I’m familiar with their work.

Aditi Sharma from Kaleerein: 7/10. Considering that this is her first show as a lead I’ll cut her some slack but as a performer she has grown since the beginning of the show, atleast from what I’ve seen. Her character Meera was initially presented as a typical “Manic Pixie Dream Girl” in the promos especially were quite misleading imho. It took her a while to get a sense of her character I feel in the beginning, and it was quite evident the way she acted in her scenes but as the show progressed, so did Aditi in terms of acting, which is always a good sign. Her Punjabi is more polished compared to the earlier episodes which is quite important since her character is well, Punjabi and the rest of the cast members, including ALL of Meera’s family members except her siblings, and the actress that plays Pammi Kapoor are native Punjabis. She’s got great screen presence and can definitely hold her own against her more experienced co-stars. I believe her forte lies in scenes where Meera is shown to be confronting someone whether it’s a potential sautaan, bitchy family members or Vivaan, as well as tashan wale scenes where she’s fighting back/rebuking Vivaan (ML of the show) when he fucks up. I’ve also noticed that she’s incredible at more nuanced/non-verbal acting. She shines in scenes where her character Meera is shown to be undergoing a lot of internal battles/dilemmas, and to convey that purely through expressions is not easy task. I will say though, she does fall short in scenes where Meera’s shown to be really stressed out (??) she tends to stutter and indulge in what I like to call “verbal word vomit” and it does give me second hand embarrassment. She definitely really needs to work on her dialogue delivery, hence the reason behind my rating, and is a huge part of the viewing experience for me especially.

Aditi DEV Sharma: 9/10. An incredibly versatile actress. I’ve been familiar with her work for quite a while now from her work in Bollywood (Mausam, LVRB), her work in tellywood (watched a bit of Ganga, and have been watching Silsila-BRK on and off), and finally her work in Punjabi cinema. I will say this though, as much as I appreciate her work in Punjabi films, I do feel like she has been typecast in her films, always essaying the role of a naive village girl in a period film. (She’s done 4 roles like that in total, 5 including her upcoming Punjabi film titled “Laatu”) There are distinctive differences in the roles she chooses there, but they’re essentially following the same template. This lowkey upsets me, because I know what she’s capable of doing, and wish she would opt for roles that weren’t pratically the same with different names. I guess she considers scripts bc they are actually GREAT, and those films are actually my faves but anyways-.

Surbhi Chandna- 10/10. Ohman. OH MAN. Do not even get me started. In my very humble opinion, Miss Chandna is the best performer/actress out of everyone from the entire cast, and one of the best, if not the best tellywood has to offer. The range this woman has managed to show in the span of 2 years in one show alone, is so astounding and praiseworthy. Can manage to make x10 the expressions faster than your fave can even manage to say the first syllable of “ex-pres-sion.” she invented expressions and comic timing, I don’t make da rulez. Can manage to make you laugh till you cry and deliver goosebump-inducing performances within (1) episode. Literally lights up the screen and keeps you captivated with her screen presence, all while presenting each and every given emotion so effortlessly, with great ease. I’m gonna stfu before I end up sounding more biased than I already am. also, why does this sound like a really badly written resume skjhjdkh.

Asha Negi:- N/A. Can’t really speak for her acting chops since I haven’t really seen her work at all, but she’s beautiful and cute af, and seems like an actual sweetheart offscreen!

[onewhoturns]

a few of my fave snippets I’ve written so far for the faeU, out of context:

- This was his place. In the darkest part of the forest, where vines choked the ground and lichen devoured charred and petrified tree trunks. A place where battle had raged ages ago, that even now bore those scars. A place - a creature - abandoned by other fae, forced from their society, left to settle in the most desolate of liminal spaces: here he reigned. An outsider. A watcher. The sole witness to all of Faerie.

- Surely, compared to humans, the fae could be no worse. 

- For the first time in her life, she met people who’d borne true witness to faerie magic. The man who could weave the finest fabrics in the kingdom even as his blood dyed every yard in a rainbow of colors. The well that could cure any disease of its townsfolk, in the village where a child disappeared every seven seasons. The Duke who’d died alone in his estate, surrounded by gold that turned to dust as it crossed the threshold, gorged on shimmering fruit and wine that whispered sweet music.

- It took her a moment staring at his shoulder before she realized -- the cloth was so pitch black, light died on it. Even as they made a turn around the dance floor, passing under lanterns, there was no reflection. It was as though he wore a hole in the world, with only small dots of gold or black thread (but not black black, not nearly as dark as the fabric itself) giving shape to the void.

- “There will be a price, of course.” She flexed her jaw for a moment. Nodded. “Of course.” “Nothing too dire,” he assured her, his voice lilting. It was like she could feel him draping the calm over her. She wanted to trust him. And the fact that he could make her think that made her uneasy. “A kiss.” 

- He just watched. Endlessly. His charming air had settled - evolved - become something more subtle. Again she bit her lip, chewing it hard, fingers slipping into her pockets to roll dried berries between them, the grit of salt catching under her nails. It was comforting. She faltered as his hand came to her cheek, thumb stroking along the poor tortured lip. His words had dropped to a murmur. “If anyone will bruise your mouth tonight, Your Majesty, it will be me.”

- “Emily…” Goosebumps broke out over her skin as he spoke her name. A name she’d never given him, a name she’d never even heard spoken in his presence -- a name that seemed so comfortable on his tongue.

- Her words were whispered between gritted teeth, angry and desperate, as she made another turn and then another: “You said a day. Give me a day. Don’t let me die.”

- “I said bow.” One of her captors dug a hand into Emily’s hair, scratching at her skull and trying to push her head down for her, but Emily grit her teeth, adamantly pushing back, refusing. A swift kick, though, and she was brought to her knees. Her head spun, the sickness she’d been trying to push back making her hands tremble as she stopped herself from sprawling flat on the ground.

- She tried to snap her teeth closed, or to spit the thing out again - she wanted to gag - but the witches were relentless. She pushed pulp back out of her mouth, hitting the faerie’s hand and dribbling gold down Emily’s chin, but it wasn’t enough. She had to breathe, so she had to swallow. Even once she had swallowed they held her mouth closed an extra few seconds. But those seconds didn’t feel nearly as awful.

- The sound felt like knives, but it made Emily happy.

- “You’re addressing a queen, Emily. How do we address royalty?” “Yes, Your Majesty. Please.”

- She didn’t understand why he looked at her like that. He looked sad - or maybe angry - his lip curled like he was disgusted by something and her eyes widened in worry that it was her, that she was doing something wrong.

- “You have nothing to apologize for.” She felt too ashamed to look him in the eye, instead watching the feet that stepped toward her. “But I will.” 

[indiumrubber]

SOPHIE!! i want to ask you essentially the same question about "the bends"!! i don't think i've ever asked how you rank the songs on it! i would also love to know your thoughts on the structure and themes of the album? i'm loving that album more and more, i think my current fave is "black star" :D

Ah! This is such a great question Alex, thank you! I’m gonna say A LOT so I’ll put it under a read more so people don’t need to scroll for aeons djsfhksjdhf

A great deal of the songs for me rank really highly, there’s only a few that I usually skip, which I’ll rank lower, but I still like them as songs, I just find them a little bit boring usually. There’s also the thing where it’s a sad album but I never feel sad listening and never have associated it with sadness in any way, probably because I always listen to instrumentation before lyrics, and Thom’s singing can sometimes be… indecipherable.

I’ve ranked the tracks on this album before, with one of those asks, and I feel like this ranking will remain pretty similar to that, but I think some reasoning is good.

Just is my undeniable favourite, as it’s both the first song of theirs I (knowingly) ever heard, and the first from this album, and I love its structure?? I didn’t even recognise the amount of chords in it, but it’s impressive (thirteen I think), and written as a competition between Thom and Jonny, so it’s really damn impressive imo for the fact it was only their second album. Also managing to fit in chords with notes lying outside the key and not have it feel clunky and out of place is really impressive (but then they as a group tend to prefer modes over keys so that’s where a lot of this comes from). I also love love the guitar on this song, it’s so powerful and genuinely gives me goosebumps, I love the tone of it, an wow the section with Jonny raising it two(?) octaves with the Whammy pedal is brilliant.

Next is My Iron Lung, which I found by accidentally leaving the album to run on from Just the first time I was listening. All this can be traced back to spotify and me being really pernickety about things. The first song was Just, which I only heard because of forgetting to change the playback settings to repeat (cause I hate when suggested music comes on, I just like listening to one album on repeat for a little while), and the fact that Just grabs you within two or three seconds - quicker than me navigating back to the window to glower whilst changing back to the album. So I was quite floored. Anyway I accidentally let the album play cause I also dislike when spotify shows recent artists you’ve heard, I prefer albums being shown. Anyway My Iron Lung has a similar vibe to Just and I love it a lot. It’s made better by the fact that all the instrumentation from the recording is a live take from the 94 Astoria performance. Holy shit.

Planet Telex is a fantastic way to start any album and I love it so much. Its introductory phasing/oscillating sounds can be played by Jonny either on the piano or guitar. I love him. Not that that needed saying. It’s just a great track, has a really specific attitude, one I don’t think could be replicated ever again, and I think a lot of that comes down to the fact that Thom was completely smashed, recording it flat on his back. Wow.

(Nice Dream) comes next. It starts off so pretty but it’s got such a bite to it, and again, it comes down to the guitars on this record, which I love a lot. Most tracks are very raw feeling, very angular and sharp, and it’s fantastic.

Street Spirit (Fade Out) is my next favourite. It’s definitely bleak, but it really forecasts their development sonically and lyrically. It’s pretty too, in an aching way, and when I worked out what the last lines were I found it so affecting. If you watch the performance of this from the Astoria again, you’ll see Jonny sing along to it, and that really touches me, as well as the fact that this is - as far as I’m aware - the first track with prominent synths: the fact that Jonny took the opportunity to incorporate this, having the confidence to branch out, makes me happy.

Sulk is my next favourite of note. I couldn’t quite tell you why, but I group a lot of songs on this album in pairs (maybe that they sound similar). Just and My Iron Lung, High And Dry and Fake Plastic Trees, The Bends and Bones, and Black Star and Sulk. Even though a lot of people probably wouldn’t agree with me so much, I really love Sulk, and it kind of came out of nowhere, given that on my first few listens, I couldn’t really remember the difference between it and Black Star. I still couldn’t tell you why I do love it so much, because it probably is one of the more generic ones from the album, but I do.

The next few songs sorta meld together for me, but definitely Fake Plastic Trees and High And Dry are two of my least favourites. That’s not to say they’re bad songs, they just bore me, but they definitely all fit the album and give it a brilliantly cohesive sound. I love this album an awful lot, given it’s my gateway to RH.

Structure-wise, I love the album, I think it tailors itself well to repeated listens, with the layers of instrumentation, but not making it too much of an impenetrable wall of sound that might otherwise push away some listeners. It’s just. So good. I think it’ll always have a very dear place in my heart!

[localrobosexual]

so how about The Last Knight huh

HECKO I totally forgot to make that post about what I thought about Transformers 5 after I watched it whOOPS

so here they are now!! :0 it’s kinda long though. Sorry about that. Unlike my post about GOTG Vol. 2 that one time, for this one I just kinda wrote down some erratic notes about thoughts and reactions I had as I watched the movie, and then I kinda summed up my opinion about it overall down at the end?? so yeah. That’s how this one is gonna play out lol. Generalized running commentary style.

(fair warning: this WILL contain spoilers!! Like I can’t,,, , talk about it without giving stuff away lmao. If you haven’t seen the movie, and still want to and plan on doing so, I don’t recommend you read this!)

alright u made it past the spoiler warning so here we go!!

-  Quintessa gave me a lot of G1 Unicron vibes with the whole "I made you, you are mine to command" thing

- "Why do we tell these stories, besides the fact that dragons are wicked" girl same lmao

- I literally cannot. CANNOT. Take Barricade seriously. With those ridiculous "punish" and “enslave” branded brass knuckles. Buddy. My dude. Please chill. You're literally trying to be so edgy man just. Turn it down a notch lmao - Optimus literally didn't sound at all like himself at first?? It sounded like he had a different voice actor for those first few lines he spoke?? That was weird. It wasn't until the second time he appeared on screen where Quintessa was telling him about where the staff was hid was I like "oh wait yeah there's Peter Cullen" - the "Cybertron is coming" shot looked sUPER fake and green screened to me for whatever reason?? like idk I think it was the lighting they had on him but it was reALLY FUNNY PFFFFTT

- Bee swinging his legs on top of that roof was sUPER CUTE THANK U IM BLESSED

- Mohawk. Um. Who thought turning Junkrat into a Transformer was a good idea bc that’s literally all this dude is lmao

- What kind of name is Nitro Zeus. Im cryin. PRETTY SURE HE HAS THE SAME VOICE ACTOR AS THE ONE TIGER ALIEN FROM BEN 10??? I DON’T REMEMBER HIS NAME BUT HE WAS THE ONE THAT ALWAYS WENT "LEMME TELL YOU SOMETHIN". WHY DOES HE HAVE SHOCKWAVE'S FACE. IM SO DONE

- I like how they had the whole holoform bike thing going on?? like how Prowl's was in TFA and Arcee’s was in TFP that was neato - I WILL NEVER GET USED TO HEARING BUMBLEBEE SWEAR I S2G but the Siri voice thing was pretty funny ngl. I saw that in a trailer on instagram and didn't actually think it was actually a real scene that they kept I thought it was just made for that specific ad but nOPE IT WAS REAL LMAO - Megatron musing over Starscream's decapitated head oh my god liSTEN MAN PUT HIM DOWN DONT BE LIKE THIS COME ON - HI CAN WE TALK ABOUT COGSMAN I LOVE COGMAN A LOT I LOVE HIM HE WAS REALLY GREAT EASILY A BIG FAVE HE WAS SO ENJOYABLE TO WATCH I love how,,, ok heck I don't know this guy very well bc I didn't watch Age of Extinction but it's the green dude with the trench coat built into him,,, Crosshairs?? I think it's Crosshairs yeah but the fact that he called him a C-3PO rip off was fUNNY MAN that also got a good laugh outta me and he totally rekt his heckin finger lmao. He was rlly short?? that surprised me kinda like from the trailers it looked like he was pretty average human sized but nope he’s super short - BEE'S DOUBLE CHEST POUND FINGER GUN "ayyy my dude" THING WAS ADORABLE THANK U - THEY ACTUALLY WENT THROUGH WITH THE WHOLE EARTH BEING UNICRON THING HOLY HECK now that,,, that was really interesting. Didn't expect that. AND the whole Nemesis Prime deal?? OP getting brainwashed?? THAT'S why he's heckin evil nO WONDER MAN GEEZ I didn't think OP would willingly do all that to the earth just because. That makes me feel a lot better actually lmao - Soundwave!! Shockwave!! u guys are famous!! wow way to go im so proud of u!!!! - Hot Rod tho,,,, , oh boy he was a mess lmao. I only really know Hot Rod through MTMTE and the 80s Transformers movie so,, , not too too much to go off of, but he just was so incredibly DIFFERENT and off-putting from what I was used to that I honestly didn't like him so much?? I mean he was alright. Grew on me a bit more as the movie went on I think. He was ok. That time warp weapon thing he had was cool tho!! nice!! seemed kinda overpowered a bit but cool!! - COGMAN SPINNING AROUND IN A CIRCLE WHILE HE WALKED THE DOG WAS ADORABLE THANK U - you know that movie trope where he background music will become like a song on the radio and then a character comes and switches it off?? YEAH THEY DID SOMETHING LIKE THAT IN THIS MOVIE WITH THE EPIC WORLD-CHANGING ORGAN MUSIC AND I JUST. COGMAN GOING HAM ON THAT ORGAN HAD ME CRYYYYYYYIIINNG HE WAS SO INTO IT MAN OH MY GO D. I LOVE COGMAN THANK U THAT’S ONE OF MY FAVORITE TROPES AND IT WAS HILARIOUS GOD BLESS - HE CAN SING OPERA TOO IM CRYYYYIINNNG MAN JUST. PLEASE LET HIM HYPE UP THE MOMENT HE'S DOING HIS BEST!!!! - THE TABLE WAS WRITTEN IN OLD CYBERTRONIAN yknow if you could get Cyclonus down there he could probs read that for you no problem. Or don't actually. Please don't drag him into Bayverse oh I s2g nevermind nevermind - HEY MAN I LOVED THAT ROBOT HYDRA WOO BOY THAT WAS COOL and it's like?? a Combiner?? but not really. Burton just said the twelve knights combined into the dragon but I doubt they can all unfuse from that form lmao it was probs just a one time thing. So not a Combiner. Still cool tho. Robot dragons. SICK!!!!!! - HEY they did the whole Unicron's a planet-eating god thing this time around too wow. Neat. Listen man all I'm saying is I glad I watched TFP and bits of G1 and that 80s movie bc if not I woulda had no idea why Unicron was important lmao. That was pretty neat tho!! Interesting. Interesting. - OK BUT COGMAN LAUGHING AND SINGING "MOVE B!TCH GET OUT THE WAY" WHILE DRIVING 200 MPH DOWN THE ROAD WAS HILARIOUS WHAT A BLESSING THANK U - Surprisingly Bee seemed to be ok in that open water??? Hanging on to the side of a submarine?? I mean. Salt water man. Buddy watch out ur gonna rust plEASE BE CAREFUL

- speaking of which didn’t they say there was gonna be a submarine transformer in this movie?? like didn’t they say that in interviews before the movie came out?? I mean. We never saw that. It might’ve been that the submarine WAS a transformer but it never spoke, never transformed, nothing. Didn’t give any indication that it was uniquely Cybertronian aside from Vivian’s magic touch thing. Idk. That wasn’t explained so I mean. Hmm.

- Cogman can make sushi!! dang!! wow!!! bravo!!! - OP'S HECKIN INTERDIMENSIONAL BOOB POCKET OH MY GO D dang wish I had one of those lmao - THAT FINAL FIGHT WITH OP AND BEE THO AAAAAAAA OH MY GO S H HECKO MAN!!!! OPTIMUS RIPS OFF BEE'S DOOR WINGS MAN!!! GEEZ!!!! what I wanna know is like since when did Bumblebee have a hammer lmao. Like,, , is it supposed to the the Forge of Solus Prime?? When did he get that?? How and why?? I don't know and it was never explained but I mean. Why tho. - OH MY GOD BUT BEE'S VOICE!! IT ACTUALLY WORKED!!! DANG!! WOW BUDDY!!! AAAA!! IM GLAD HE'S OK!!! and that's all it takes to snap Optimus outta his brainwashed phase lmao ok then. Cool. Wasn’t what I expected him to sound like either but then again I really don’t know what I expected in the first place lmao - I feel a LOT better knowing Optimus didn't willingly wanna destroy the earth like. He was brainwashed. And when he snapped outta it he felt absolutely awful about what he did. I mean it felt like that whole plot point was rushed, a lot of this movie felt very rushed, but it makes me feel better at least lmao. Optimus I'm sorry man can I,,, , give u a hug or something man it rlly looks like u need a hug - "YOU CHOSE THE WRONG SIDE" OOOOOH BOY FLASHBACKS TO THAT CAPTAIN AMERICA CIVIL WAR BIT IN PRI.ME(3) LMAOOOO - CADE. BUDDY. YOU CANT JUST BLOCK A SWORD LIKE THAT. THAT WAS A KILLING BLOW DEALT BY A GIANT ALIEN ROBOT I DONT CARE HOW SPECIAL THAT MEDALLION THINGY IS U CANT JUST DO THAT LMAOOOO. And then as soon as he whips that sword out the rest of the knights are like "oh wait yeah let's stop killing this guy we're chill now let's all point out swords together" lmaooooo - Crosshairs' "Love that guy. Goosebumps every time" line after Optimus gives his mandatory speech lmAO DUDE SAME - "You were by far the coolest" alright Cogman you ruined the moment a lil bit but man I still love u hecko - OK THIS IS GONNA SOUND REALLY STUPID BUT LISTEN MAN I'M GLAD THERE WAS,,,, , a lot of hand holding going on towards the end. Like fr. Cogman to dying Burton and Vivian and Cade as they were gonna jump outta that plane onto the Cybertronian tendril whatevers. Just. Small bits of physical reassurance and comfort in times of real great distress. I appreciate that a LOT more than like, watching two characters make out right before the big climactic final showdown lmao. Thank u movie wow I really didn't expect that - SO THERE WAS A COMBINER TEAM!! A COMBINER MINOTAUR!!! DANG NOT EVEN GONNA LIE THAT THING WAS NEATO!!! - Ok forget what I said about Hot Rod at the beginning he redeemed himself at the end. I didn't like him and first but now,, , now we chill. Granted I still can't see him as being HOT ROD bc he's just so different from what I know him as Rodimus but I can still appreciate him as his own character. Cool cool. - OPTIMUS RIDING THE ROBOT HYDRA INTO BATTLE AND BLOWING EVERYTHING UP WAS GREAT. MAN THAT WAS GOOD. "DID YOU FORGET WHO I AM" WOOOO BOY CHILLS MAN!!!! - OH COME ON they still made out. Lmao. Dangit. It was inevitable but I mean come on man. Alright. They kept it short and quick thank you tho if u had to put in a make out scene at least u kept it to a minimum. Thank you. Can we get back to the robots now pls. - AAAAA BUMBLEBEE'S "STING LIKE A BEE" LINE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA - that ending was pretty sudden lmao. A lot of this movie was sudden and fast. They just jump cut STRAIGHT to those credits man not even an ending panorama or clean slow zoom out shot or anything lmao - AND OH BOY THEY TEASED UNICRON’S GONNA ACTUALLY COME BACK AND APPEAR IN ANOTHER MOVIE AAAAAAA OH NO OH BOY NOT AGAIN GOSH DARN IT LMAO 

All in all, surprisingly, I actually ended up kinda enjoying it!! Like it really wasn't as bad as I thought it would be!! Tbh for me it might even be second best in the series!! (First being the first movie from 2008 lmao) Honestly I was really REALLY surprised at how much I didn't hate it. Like. I still dislike it to a degree because it's still Bayverse, and I probably won't watch it again unless I'm with friends (like I do with the rest of the transformers movies) but it honestly wasn't too too bad! It really exceeded my expectations as far as plot, and I wasn't hardcore cringing for most of the movie so hey that's a plus!! The movie had a lot of genuinely funny moments, especially with Cogman, which got some pretty good laughs outta me like I was really having fun at those parts!! Optimus’ absence for most of the movie didn’t sit well with me for some reason. Like it just felt strange. But it kinda had to be for the story to move forward so I guess I can forgive that lol. The pacing was REALLY whack and way too fast though. Like they were REALLY trying to cram a whole lotta stuff into a relatively short amount of time. The movie's almost two and a half hours long but it really didn't feel like that because of how fast the pacing was. Some of the dialogue felt really forced because of this issue too. It didn’t feel genuine sometimes. But that has to be like, pretty much my only specific issue with it?? surprisingly?? wow. I'm honestly super shocked lmao dang man I didn’t think I’d like this movie at all but I was very much proved wrong!! I hated those old ladies tho and their obsession to get Vivian a boyfriend and the whole innuendo thing. Yeah. No. Don't do that. Stop. I'm too ace for this. 

anyways yeah those were my thoughts sorry that was so long lmao whoops  

[theproofinthisong]

WALLS REVIEW

i’m back for my review of walls!!

kill my mind: the perfect opening for the album & to announce the new era. i remember listening to it for the first time and my jaw dropping because i didn’t expect that sound & at the same time, it made total sense. it’s not my favorite genre personally but this track is so audacious and amazing. it’s probably the one that is the most different from louis’ previous sounds (in the band or solo stuff) and he’s giving us LIFE with the pop punk bop we always dreamed of. his voice is unique in every song but it especially stands out in this one, particularly at the beginning of the track. it’s such a fierce catchy and energetic track, you want to scream it at the top of your lungs. this is the type of song that makes the crowd lose its shit live. can’t wait to see it. the gimmicks in this one (the aaaah aaah part and the kill my kill my at the end mostly) are so clever, you hear them one time and boom, they can’t leave your mind, it’s witchcraft. i love the contrast between the very high and very low notes, they’re just perfection. AND THE BELTING!!! it’s hot. the earlier pop inspirations are pretty much there and it’s such a wonderful tribute. no wonder why louis loves this track so much. it’s gold and very very bold. 

don’t let it break your heart: see, the first time i listened to the new tracks (at ccme), i was instantly captivated by defenceless & habit. dliby was not a favorite instantly. but it became one. i don’t know why THE FUCK i didn’t pick as a favorite right on the spot. because it is a godsent. like hell!!! the nostalgia!! the raw emotion!! the hope it’s giving you!! the goosebumps!! and OH MY GOD louis’ voice in his...one of his best vocals. like period. it’s so soft and so strong at the same time. it’s so full of feelings, like the vulnerability!! the song speaks to me so much. AND OH MY GOD THE ALBUM VERSION!!! the single one was already extraordinary but the album arrangment makes it even more perfect and delicate!!! the writing in this one makes me cry, it’s so to the point and honest, like you can feel his heart beating in it. it’s the kind of music you carry with you. i know decades from now, it will remind me of my youth and the happy times i had back then. god i’m already sobbing.

two of us: honestly, there are no words for this one. it’s above everything. it’s without a doubt louis’ most personal and gutwrenching track. it’s not the one i listen to the most because it’s painful and so real. you can feel every crack, every hurdle, every tear, every ounce of desperation, every bit of newfound hope. i have a personal connection to this one because i experienced what louis is talking about. i lost my dad when i was 16, a little younger than louis. and oh my god the words he uses to talk about it and his grief is what i felt and still feel. those songs where EVERY WORD could be applied to you and your situation almost never happen. it’s a miracle. so yeah, it hurts to listen to it. but it also makes me really happy. i feel understood, i feel a kinship to him. and while i have no doubt everyone can relate to this song and have it resonating with them, losing a parent is a very specific kind of grief. and i never saw someone describing it so well in a song. his voice is so angelic in this. it’s so controlled but at the same time it’s on the verge of collapsing everytime and never does. god. if i had to pick a song to have as a tattoo, i will pick this one for sure. what a masterpiece.

we made it: BLOODY WE MADE IT. one of the most IN YOUR FACE larry songs out of walls (even if they all are) and i’m dying. it’s easily in my top 3 of louis’ songs performed live. THE POWER. THE CERTAINTY OF IT ALL. like his voice is so assured in this while still being able to be vulnerable and fragile. HOW?? HOW CAN YOU DO IT?? it’s one of the sappiest love songs i’ve ever heard but those are my weakness and fave. what a beautiful declaration. the lyrics are...well i still can’t believe they’re real. he deadass told us everything about his relationship with harry and how they were able to overcome all the obstacles thrown in their faces. in terms of melody, it’s a 10000000/10. you can’t help but sing it with him. it’s wonderfully produced, like the best kind of pop. it has a bit of those oasis vibes (walls and dlibyh also have them) which i’m a HUGE fan of. it’s such an effective single, like i can’t even count the times i listened to it. fucking treasure.

too young: another case of a song i adored the minute i listened to it, but it wasn’t as intense as with others. now it’s truly one of my most cherished tracks out of the album. the opening lines simply kill you, it’s whispered, it’s tender, it’s!!!! too much for my heart!! i’m swooning. i love that he doesn’t push his voice there, it stays at a low level and it makes it even more louder, in a way?? you feel like he’s speaking to only one person (who?? i wonder...), it’s so intimate i almost feel like intruding?? it’s a fucking gift. in terms of writing, it’s also one of my favorite because there are no filters. it tells the story without fear. louis just spilled his whole heart out in his track and that’s so fucking admirable. a jewel we need to protect.

walls: FIRST THE FUCKING INSTRUMENTAL. it fucking ruined me. someone said this song was like a late night conversation and it’s true. walls is probably the song that shows his personal growth the most, like louis couldn’t have written this song five years ago. it’s so grown. it’s so wise. so full of life and conclusions you made. it’s peaceful. it’s reassuring. i don’t know how a song can make you feel all of that but it does. and the lyrics are one of his best. it’s so significative at times (the goodbyes line for example), but metaphorical also (the cardboard full of clothes lines IS GENIUS and the walls one...obviously the best) and opening the song with a sentence and ending it with it is...pure magic. it’s clever but not only. it shows how much he went through and how he’s healing from it and how it helped him, in a way. and the voice. liquid honey. bye.

habit: legend snapped when he included the princess park line. what a chaotic larrie. i expected nothing less from him. i love the melody, it’s so catchy and happy!! it’s kind of a break after the rollercoaster you just went through. very needed. i’m still having a breakdown over it though. it’s such a cute ballad and beautiful love song. you just wanna move your head to it, it makes you truly happy. sunshine in a song form. like i’m smiling rn. and you can hear louis smiling while singing it too!!! it’s...wow. he’s able to communicate his feelings in a manner no other artist can. i will never get tired of it.

always you: we did our waiting. we were fucking starved. now we’re being fed babes!! miss always you is so iconic. the melody is ingrained in my brain after hundred times of listening to that damn snippet. the things i would do for louis. i love what he does with his voice in this, like he’s changing tones and going from one note to another like a champ. this song is so fucking hard to sing and louis is the ONLY one who can master it. shows how unique his voice is. i’m in love with the high parts and the chorus. dang. that’s a song. tell me that this song isn’t THE SHIT. it’s iconic as fuck. and it’s so lovely. still haven’t recovered from all the baby and home mentions. ALSO the legs wrapped around me line??? kill me please!!! i do not thank you.

fearless: now that’s an adjective that comes to mind while talking about louis. the verses aren’t my favorite melody wise but omg the bridge and the chorus!! he did that!!! it’s also the song where he’s singing the lowest (that head voice bitch) and omg. for now it isn’t in my top but i know it will grow on me and i can’t wait.  the lyrics are amazing nonetheless.

perfect now: we know it’s louis’ least favorite track and it’s mine too. it’s still louis though so still amazing. just like fearless, the verses aren’t my favorite part but same, the bridge and the chorus are wonderful. it’s pretty soft. also this is a song about harry (you steal the scene and it’s unrehearsed??) but some sentences can be applied to family and it’s such a nice & encouraging track to listen to when you think about the people you love. it’s very happy. makes you feel loved and exactly where you should be. and as always, his voice is to die for in it.

defenceless: to the surprise of exactly nobody, it’s my favorite song out of walls. it was love at first sight. you cannot explain it. it just is. in terms of writing, it’s my personal favorite (especially “sleeping on our problems and we’ll solve them in our dreams” which is pure poetry...the talent, the impact...i’m dying. also i put this quote everywhere i could, i’m OBSESSED with it). it tucks at your heartstrings, like it’s a very hopeful song but at the same time it’s full of memory of heartbreaks. i could bawl talking about it. harry and louis’ situation is impossible to describe and to comprehend. the things and contradictory feelings they had to face..i can’t even imagine. but he gives us a full glimpse of it in this song. and it’s so fucking brave to be this honest. it takes so much courage and trust. and i’m just in awe. artistically speaking, it’s a fucking tour de force. but like personally, what it means to louis...oh god. i’m dead. and THE MOTHERFUCKING FALSETTO. louis almost never uses it and oh my god. it’s breathtaking. it’s what you hear when you enter heaven. no one, fucking no one, has this kind of falsetto. it’s so special. it makes me wanna die. it’s too much for my heart. my god.

only the brave: it would have been ALSO my favorite song out of walls it it was longer. because it’s...i’m speechless. also very oasis but very louis. and sorry, but it’s better than oasis will ever be. there i said it. the lyrics are objectively the best out of the album, like i’m a slut for metaphors and they’re everywhere in here. i don’t know how to qualify it really but it has this anthem like quality? i can see the arena and thousands of people singing it back to louis. it reminds me of home in the sense that it’s subtle but very blatant at the same time. like he wrote this for us gay people. that ache is there. the pain. the underlying anger. but the optimism. knowing the hurt but never wishing to go back. the vocal control is incredible in this, i’ll say it again, but the ability to switch to chest voice to head voice back to back...he’s one in a billion. there is an intention behind every line and you can feel it piercing your soul. gimme rest.

4 years in the making. i’m so glad i waited and was besides Louis through it all. i’m so fucking proud i could cry. it’s a masterpiece of an album. it has everything. simply everything. i couldn’t have dreamed something better. the voice, the melodies, the lyrics, the emotion, the confidence, the range, the diversity of sounds, the different influences and the way he’s able to bring the best out of them and make them this, the old pop vibe of it while remaining extra modern..it’s pure art. it’s what art should be. making you feel every emotion the artist wanted you to. no one does it better than louis. god. thank you.

[sleepykichii]

11 Questions Tag

i was tagged by @pinkheichou @tiny-heichou and @salbelni so that's uh...that's 33 questions holy shit this is gonna be forever long lmaoo

Rules: 1. Always post the rules 2. Answer the questions given by the person who tagged you 3. Write 11 questions of your own 4. Tag 11 people

idk if it’ll tag you guys if i put them under the cut so! i tag: @tokyo-ghouls-eat-rawmen @kingtatsunari @bertoltssweat @sluttttysurveycorps @piningmarco @lesliebruhleria @iviarka @softymir @dallyingdivergent @levi-nyanchou @noodlesforlyfe  don’t feel obligated to do this!! 

1. Is there a book/movie that you’ve read/watched many times? Which one? i usually dont like rewatching/rereading things but my guilty pleasure is snk, i love to watch the dubbed episodes and compare it to the subbed episodes, i love going back and noticing details i couldnt bc i was reading subtitles, comparing manga panels to anime scenes, yknow, lil things like that 2. What do you love most about your friends? they try their best to cheer me up when they know i'm feeling down~ 3. Ever been a witness to someone doing something hella embarrassing? (You don’t have to tell anything about it) uh yeah, my best friend irl fell and literally slid down her stairs when she was drunk after prom last year and wanted to do it again 4. A fandom you didn’t think you would ever be a part of? tbh danganronpa. on my old blog, before i got back into watching anime, i thought their hair was rly...unique, to say the least, and didn't think i would ever give it the time of day 5. Do you have a “trash character” you like? komaeda :') and ouma, i know a lot of ppl rly don't like him lmao 6. Pastel or Black? black, i love pastels but i look rly good in black lmao 7. Pet peeves? when ppl ignore/interrupt me, unneccesary loud noises, lack of privacy, AND WHEN PPL CHEW WITH THEIR MOUTH OPEN OH MY GOD 8. If you had one free wish what would it be? (Wishing for xx/endless wishes is not allowed) i would wish to bring immense joy to myself and every person i crossed paths with! 9. What are your favourite tropes/AUs for your ships? holy SHIT im a slut for AUs. i lovelovelove actor AUs, zombie/post apocalyptic AUs, high school/boarding school AUs, college AUs, summercamp AUs, band AUs, coffee shop AUs, apartment AUs...i could rly go on but i'll stop lmaooo 10. Are you an emotional person? VERY 11. Are you more attracted to popular ships or rare pairs? i dont rly have a preference, if i see a ship i like, it's popularity doesn't concern me c:

1. Whats your favorite book? i rly don't know, i haven't read a book in forever fml i've already read all the books on my shelf and they're like...8th grade reading level :-// my most recent read was more than this by patrick ness and it was pretty good! 2. Do you collect anything? stickers!! i love stickers so much lmao what else...cute pins, and i'm slowly building a collection i call 'roadside paintings' where -- you guessed it -- i pick up deserted paintings on the side on the road. i currently have two hanging up in my room! 3. The last Song you listened to? sir sly - high 4. Do you like Tea? If yes whats your favorite kind of tea? fuck yeah!! tea > coffee, all day every day. i rly love blueberry acai green tea and papaya passionfruit black tea!! 5. Whats the first Anime/Manga you ever watched/read? if u wanna get technical, sailor moon was the first ever, but naruto is the first one i went out of my way to watch. the first manga was shugo chara! i would probably still read it bc the characters are adorable and the plot is interesting! 6. Whats your favorite childhood movie? pokemon 2000!! 7. Your favorite poem? the universe took its time on you crafted you precisely so you could offer the world something distinct from everyone else so when you doubt how you were created you doubt an energy greater than us both -rupi kaur 8. Your favorite Painting? i don't rly have one!! 9. Whats the most amazing thing that happened to you? still somehow being alive right this very second 10. Whats the Title of the last Fanfiction you have read? i wanna say it was something simple like 'roommates' or along those lines, i honestly haven't read fanfiction in a couple weeks;; 11. Write 3 Book, Fanfic and Manga Title that you totally recommend! i have the comprehension skills of a potato so idk if you mean three of each or three total so i'm just gonna do three total book: more than this - patrick ness (rly good, rly weird. makes you think about our reality a little more. worth a reread when you're finished so you can piece all the information together) fanfic: blue bear - afishoutofwater (snk/eremin - i was in tears by the end of this, it's so sad but very well written. major character death & angst, just a heads up!) manga: killing stalking (hoo boy. this isnt for the faint of heart, lots of dark themes along the lines of torture and murder. not everyone's cup of tea, and that's okay!! <3)

① What are you most proud of? this is probably stupid to be proud of but it's the first thing that came to mind even though i wasnt that good, i made it into my eighth grade talent show playing the keyboard i got up there in front of the entire middle school and fucked up tremendously BUT I DIDNT CHICKEN OUT! so!! +1 point for tay woohoo ② Have you ever been so impressed you were left speechless? if you mean impressed by someone's level of stupidity, yeah lmaooo, otherwise not rly ③ What’s your favorite time of day? 10AM - 2-3PM, i'm the only one awake during these hours (unless my mom has work) and the house is completely silent for once ④ Is there a certain song that gives you goosebumps everytime you hear it? history maker from yoi gave me goosebumps for a while but no song has consistently given me goosebumps lmao ⑤ Is there something, let it be a hobby/food/movie/book/song/etc., from your childhood that you still love today? i still collect stickers and i still rly love beanie babies...i also don't mind watching the berenstein bears/dragon tales with my niece bc those were my faves when i was a kid ⑥ What never fails to make you happy? my morning solitude and fluffy art/fanfics of my otps!! ⑦ Do you dream? If so, which one was most memorable? i dream sometimes, but my fave reccurring dream is where everything is neon, like the saturation has been yanked up 100%, and i'm just walking down a sidewalk minding my own business, and then it starts raining acid and everything starts melting away until i'm just kinda floating in the void lmao i usually wake up right after everything disappears ⑧ Who’s your favorite tumblr artist/writer/editor/etc.? Feel free to name/tag more than one! the first one that came to mind was @glassesgirl0401, rarepair mom for life ; v ; ⑨ What’s your favorite fanart? Could you please link to its source? omg i love every piece of fanart tht i reblog i cant pick just one!! i rly love how everyone has their own art style and ways of drawing certain things differently, the individuality is what makes art so amazing! ⑩ What’s your headcanoned sexuality/gender identity/romantic orientation of your favorite SNK character? omg there's so many tht i like aaaaa if i had to pick just one, it would be armin and he's hella gay :3 ⑪ ^May I draw them with their pride flag’s colors for you? AAAAAA PLEASE?? that would be so great?! thank you!!! <3

here are my questions, i tried to make them interesting! 1.) If you had one, what was your 'stereotype' in school? (jock, nerd, goth, etc) 2.) What are your favorite and least favorite foods? 3.) Who is your favorite character from your current fandom and why? 4.) If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? 5.) What are your favorite hobbies? 6.) Spring, Summer, Fall, or Winter? 7.) What's one obstacle you've overcome recently? 8.) Yes or no: Pineapple on pizza? Fries dipped in mayonnaise? Ketchup on eggs? 9.) What is your most resourceful skill? 10.) If you could pick three fictional characters to bring to life, who would they be and why? 11.) What is the end-goal for you; What do you want to do with your life?

thanks for reading this far lmao sorry that took a lot longer than i thought it would

[one-soul-two-brothers]

one-soul-two-brothers’ ultimate fic recs: wincest edition (part II)

how I chose these: Wincest fics are my (other) absolute faves to read First time fics are the best I like them to keep some semblance of canon Happy endings are a requirement A fic doesn’t have to have sex to be good (but it doesn’t hurt) They have all been thoroughly vetted (aka I’ve read them all at least twice, and will definitely be reading them all again) 

ENJOY!

best SELF HARM / ED

title: Brittle rating: explicit word count: 30k summary: Sam Winchester has an eating disorder. excerpt: They pass another mile marker and Sam takes another bite, chews it over contentedly and Dean’s smile dulls a fraction. He eases up off the gas and waits, and waits, and waits. Sam doesn’t take another bite until they come up on another mile marker. Dean speeds up. The next bite comes faster, at the next mile marker. When Dean laughs again it’s edging into mania. anna’s notes: Hands down one of my all-time favorites. It’s so well-written, it incorporates canon seamlessly, and it’s completely believable. Just...go read it. Now.

title: My Only Home rating: explicit word count: 13k summary: Dean's been gone a while, running wild with a twisted soul and black eyes. When Sam finally brings him back, Dean realizes his little brother hasn't been doing well in his absence, and he has more important things to worry about than what he did as a demon. excerpt: Dean’s human again and Sam should eat something but he can’t. Instead he takes another sip of the whiskey and swears he can feel it collecting hot in his otherwise empty belly. He’s never had a relapse like this before, even though pushing his plate away has remained a default response for him any time they fight. If he and Dean are in the thick of it, Sam can’t eat, but usually they make up pretty quick. All the years and miles between them and the desperation has never really subsided. They never did do so well with words, anyway. They’ve always said everything they needed to without them – with touches, kisses, teeth and hands. Sam needs that right now, he needs it the way he’s always needed it, but he won’t go to Dean. He needs his big brother, but he knows that the only thing that matters is that they’re together again at all; the rest has to be Dean’s choice.

best DRUNK DIAL

title: Moderation Itself rating: explicit word count: 4100 summary: The brothers get into a fight (over something stupid, of course) and Sam leaves. The absence stretches from weeks to months, and one night Dean can’t take it anymore and drunk-dials Sam, leaving a very non-brotherly message. excerpt: The next day, he hit Florida. He spent three days in Jacksonville, killing a water spirit like something out of Greek mythology, and then he was on the road again, passing through Georgia and Alabama and on up into Tennessee. Next thing he knew, it'd been a week since he'd gotten laid, and then two. It wasn't that he didn't have opportunities—hell, he was Dean Winchester, chicks practically fell onto his dick every time he walked into a bar—he just couldn't stop thinking about Sam, and how Sam apparently wanted to fuck Dean so bad that he'd up and left—Sam, his baby brother, who Dean had spent his whole fucking life trying to protect.

best FUCK OR DIE

title: Who Looks Inside, Awakes rating: explicit word count: 6600 summary: Dean finds himself the victim of spirit which drains life by inducing erotic nightmares. There's only one solution, but he doesn't like it. He doesn't like it at all...

best WEECEST

title: It Started Out With A Kiss rating: explicit word count: 17k summary: Sam has a date. That's not the problem. The problem is that Sam's asking Dean to teach him how to kiss. The problem is that this kiss changes everything. anna’s notes: I’m not a big fan of weecest in general (mainly because I like later-season fics) but this one is cute. And Sam is 17 here.

best MPREG

title: Riot Gear rating: mature word count: 21k summary: Shortly before they ganked Dick Roman Sam became pregnant. He either knew and didn't tell Dean because he didn't want to give Dean any more pressure or he had no idea at all. The stress and trauma of seeing Dean and Cas disappear along with Crowley taking off with Kevin sends Sam into a downward spiral. The added stress from hitting Riot causes Sam to have a miscarriage. Sam spends time recovering physically, but not emotionally, with Amelia who knows not to ask about the baby.When Dean gets back and reams Sam out for not looking for him, Sam can't bring himself to tell Dean what happened. He thinks Dean will blame him for losing their kid and that it'll be the final straw. anna’s notes: This is the first mpreg I’ve ever read mostly because I think it’s kinda weird. But I actually really liked this one! It’s totally heartbreaking (but it does eventually have a happy ending.)

best PLOT WHAT PLOT

title: You’re Possessing Me rating: explicit word count: 3200 summary: Dean goes looking for something to get himself off to--he's in no way expecting to stumble on porn vids of Sam. But now that he has, he's becoming obsessed.

title: untitled rating: explicit word count: 1000 summary: Dean buys a “create-a-cock” vibrator kit. excerpt: “You don’t think it’d be beneficial to you to watch me fuck myself using it? Or if we had to spend the night apart on a case or something, and you could watch how much I miss you on your laptop?” Dean stalks up to Sam, getting into his space and hooking his fingers into the belt loops of his jeans. “That doesn’t sound like anything you’d like at all?”

title: Nothing Is Enough For Me rating: explicit word count: 3300 summary: Sam uses the hotel shampoo and it causes an unexpected reaction.  excerpt: Without taking his eyes off the road, Dean reaches over and pushes Sam’s hair back behind his ear. His fingers slide through the silky strands and his fingertips graze Sam’s temple, tracing almost delicately over the curve of Sam’s ear before pulling away. It’s a simple, casually intimate gesture, something that would normally make Sam grin like a dork at the display of sweetness from his brother. Only today, whatever the shampoo was doing to Sam’s scalp made Dean’s touch race through him like an electric pulse. It sent goosebumps spreading down his arms and sides, even making his nipples hard. His eyes practically roll back in his head and he shudders in his Fed suit like Dean had just run his fingernails hard up Sam’s naked back.

best SEASON 12 CODAS  (episodes 1-11)

title: untitled (12x02) summary: Fix-it for the missing Brother Hug. anna’s notes: Ficlet. Shameless self-promo.

title: untitled (12x02) summary: The aftermath of Sam’s torture. anna’s notes: Ficlet.

title: First Crush (12x03) summary: Sam tells Mary about his first crush. anna’s notes: Ficlet. Probably my favorite ficlet ever.

title: untitled (12x07) summary: Sam’s stronger than Lucifer. anna’s notes: Ficlet.

title: Your Billie Will Explode if You Mix Them with Soda (12x09) rating: mature word count: 1140 summary: A short coda to "First Blood": what happened when they died. excerpt: “You will let us into our heaven while we’re dead.” “You must be joking.” “Non-negotiable.” “I hope you two decide it’s gonna be you, Dean.” “Yeah, I get that.”

title: Like A Virgin (12x09) excerpt: Circumstances being what they were, lube was not an option, so as soon as he bent Sam over and shoved Sam’s prison uniform down his body Dean spit into his palm, fingers circling Sam’s hole. “Fuck, you’re so tight,” Dean murmured in awe. “Like a fucking virgin again.” anna’s notes: Ficlet. Disgustingly hot.

title: After Blood (12x09) rating: explicit word count: 1244 summary: Sam and Dean take comfort in each other. excerpt: But when Billie had asked the question, when Dean had looked at Sam for what could have been the last time? He didn’t want to leave him, but he knew there was no way he could lose him either.

title: Coda 12.11 excerpt: The brother that had come in on the tail end of all of that had startled the living fuck out of him. There’d been no way to dodge the messy truth that had hit him like a hammer to the chest a moment later, and it had left a heart-deep, bone-deep bruise that Dean was pretty sure was going to hurt until he died. Because he’d known even then, amid the fading violet glow from the grimoire, that he couldn’t, wouldn’t, tell Sam about this, couldn’t ask the kid for this... anna’s notes: Ficlet. A+.

title: Distraction (12x11) rating: teen+ word count: 2200 summary: Losing his memories means that Dean loses inhibitions Sam didn't even know he had. excerpt: Dean’s smirk is fully back in place. He’s still up against the wall where Sam had pushed him, still shirtless and of course, still stunning. He licks his lips oh so slowly, eyes sliding down Sam’s body to where Sam is still hard in his pants. Sam’s breath is still coming short, and he scrambles for a way to stop this while he still can. Dean is like a child, he thinks, frustrated because Dean has always been better with kids than he has. What would he do with a child who wanted to do something they shouldn’t?

title: Until You Come Back Home (12x11) rating: mature word count: 4800 excerpt: Cas wonders, as he often does, if he should tell Sam that he knows what it really is that he needs. He decides that tonight, after all these years, he finally will. They’re not getting any younger, after all, and he’s mainly stayed out of it because he didn’t truly believe that two people so singularly and utterly devoted could be that stubborn and obtuse. It’s maddening, and it almost seems purposeful, how they ignore each others’ signals, like they each have that secret locked down so tight (out of shame, probably, or guilt), each other’s light can’t get through. It’s tragic, almost, if he’s being completely honest. anna’s notes: Okay but this is just fan-fucking-tastic. Starts off from Castiel’s POV but changes to the brothers’. First time, super sweet, just...so good. Go read it.

For my other ultimate fic recs (j2 non-au, j2 au, and wincest), go here.