#not including mc obvi

[firstborn-if]

tfw a headcanon you had can be supported by actual fact

[mothergayselle]

he loves me not - shall we date? obey me! (mc vs. belphie)

rating: T-M words: 4k summary: a one-shot addressing the MC's emotions after That Scene from the first season. idk why they never bring it up again, but if you're gonna fight, you might as well keep it in the family & go all out, bb! (ewww.) (spoilers for the first season, obvi.) (characters include all of the brothers and a FMC.)

read on ao3

The sharp sound of her hand across his face is a gunshot, a cannon explosion which detonates all around them.

The amethyst-eyed demon balks, mouth wide open, the unending indigo of his gaze flaring to life at the assault. He staggers where he stands, dazed, not by the pain itself but because of the shock. 

Everyone else is frozen as well, varying expressions of horror and fear etched onto their faces. No one steps forward to stop or restrain her, and Freya sways from the force of her own attack, though she orients herself at once. And then, without an ounce of hesitation, she tenses again, all of the muscles in her body rigid with fury.

The opposite hand slams into the demon’s face, palm and fingers hard against him. Her knuckles collide with a delicious impact, and a fodder of gasps dissolve into the air. The demon stumbles, just once, his back foot catching on the ground to steady himself.

But she is already vaulting, clinging to the demon’s body as they both crashed to the ground with a painful thud! Straddling his waist, Freya cocks her fist back and prepares to strike and strike and strike. She doesn’t realize she is screaming until the grass beneath her is shivering from the force.

XXX

She is fading. She is dying. She can feel the sides of her trachea being crushed underneath his fingertips, folding into itself and mawed by his supernatural strength. She cannot even gasp for air as he lifts her a few inches off the ground, her toes intermittently dragging across its surface. Freya is beating and slapping and hitting at the arm and hand which kills her so easily, but she knows. She knows she doesn’t stand a chance.

“I can’t stop laughing,” he giggles, the staccato array of chuckles darkening into madness. “The look on your face! Ahahaha!!”

Her eyes wander, desperate to claim one last look at the person she loved most in the three fucking realms. He isn’t there yet. No one is. Will she really die before smiling at him one last time?

“BELPHEGOR!”

All at once, a horde of demons appear. They’re seemingly conjured from the void, racing into the foyer from the kitchen, the dormitory hallways—Satan nearly trips down the stairs from the force of his own shock and terror.

A swell of hot, stinging tears gathers behind her eyes, and suddenly, she is crying. She is sobbing, in fact, unable to choke out noise or phlegm or snot, and twitches because of it. As she gazes upon the faces of her most cherished loved ones, she finds that her chest not only constricts but convulses as well. The six, demon brothers stare at her, horror and agony blended together upon each feature, twisting their eyes and mouths in harsh ways.

Satan is the first to speak, hands trembling by his sides. “Let her GO, Belphegor!”

But Belphegor only grins, the smile exposing too many of his teeth to be natural. “Why should I? Look at how the human squirms. Isn’t she lovely like this?” For a moment, Belphegor’s gaze rakes over her face and body, slightly suspended as it still is. “Her face… tightened in pain… she’s exquisite.”

A hiss pulses through the air. She finds Lucifer, black aura gathering around him in waves. Wings suddenly explode out of him, and he shifts into demon form.

“Do not force me to take action, Belphegor.” Lucifer’s voice is sharper and more severe than she’s ever heard it before. He takes two steps forward, surpassing the crowd his brothers have formed in front of them.

“Let. Her. Go.”

Belphegor only sneers. “It’s too late.”

And indeed, it is. Freya gazes into the churning, broiling eyes of a man plunged into insanity, and she finds nothing there but the desire to cause pain. Although a fire erupts inside her chest, a deep, unending cold seeps into her skin, her bones… Freya’s eyes flutter closed of their own accord, until another voice, cracking with desperation, snaps her back to the present.

“Belphie…” Beezelbub pleads.

“Please.”

It’s almost imperceptible—the flash of doubt, so minute, illuminating Belphegor’s eyes. The flash is replaced by rage however, and Freya feels her arms drop to her sides. She’s so close to death, she can’t even lift her limbs. The fire swirls hotter, calcinating her heart and lungs into dust.

She wants to speak… but death will not let her.

Goodbye, she thinks, trying her very best to somehow project this thought into the minds of the brothers. She thinks of deep, red, carnelian eyes before the endl, too weak now to even find them.

 I love you all.

The bonfire suddenly stutters, and the world goes black.

XXX

She is airborne… and then something hard and rock-solid collides with her back. If she was breathing, the wind would’ve been knocked out of her. Instead, she simply lays there, every sound around a garbled concoction of noise.

Tendrils of warmth snake around her, pressing her close to something which is also warm. Her neck is suddenly supported, though her head still tilts over it, limp.

“Freya… Freya!”

She can barely make the words out. She knows that voice, though. A painful, weak lick of fire stabs through her. Mammon…

“Freya, don’t you die! FREYA!”

“Ahahaha! Mammon, you look like such a fool!”

“Belphie, what have you done!?” Beel…

Something fluid then drips onto her cold, frigid face. Warm and wet, she can feel the liquid trailing over her own cheeks and neck.

Tears?

Is Mammon… crying?

“Freya,” he chokes, his voice a mere whisper. She can feel him start to shake against her. “Come back. Please come back to me.”

Freya never wanted this… never wanted to leave the brothers, Simeon and Luke, the Devildom… hell, even Solomon, who contains more secrets than she could ever fathom. Barely cognizant and even in the clutches of imminent death, she realizes that she hates Belphegor for taking her away from them all.

She hates him. He did this. He killed her. And now the brothers will suffer. They will cry and scream and wail, and Belphegor will swallow it all whole, such is his taste for destruction.

If she could, Freya would kill him. She would end his life.

Freya is fading. Her last thoughts are saturated with rage and despair… not quite a fitting death, she thinks. Still. She will die in the arms of someone she loves deeply, someone who, despite the ice-cold shell of her broken body, keeps her tepidly warm against him.

The vibrations of loud, combustible clamor suddenly sounds off in the foyer. Yelling. People are yelling, though she is nothing but a pinprick of sentience left. Freya knows she will go in the next several seconds, and the warmth from before descends onto her forehead. Skin… Mammon’s skin. Mammon’s forehead. He is rocking them back and forth, his eyes spilling droplets of tears onto her own.

“Freya, I love you,” he breathes onto her cheek. “Don’t go. Don’t die. I love you.”

Reality dissolves, unravels itself like an infinite, cosmic ball of yarn. The void sings a haunting melody which resounds throughout the entirety of her body. Freya, exhausted, lets go. The blackness overtakes her and she is unwillingly, but peacefully, shrouded inside a dimension of nothingness.

Mammon… be happy.

XXX

They’re on their way to class. The twinkling constellations glimmer back at them from the sky, their once unfamiliar skeletons now relatively memorized. Each demon is a mass of towering splendor, and Freya, with her long, raven hair and heterochromic eyes, is a slender body weaving between brothers, exchanging banter and small-talk.

Asmodeus leaps forward, seizing Freya’s right arm to his chest. “I want to walk with Freya! You want to walk with me too, right, gorgeous?”

Similar sentiments—as well as louder opposition—sound off behind them.

“Oi! Asmo! Get your filthy hands off of my human!”

“T-That’s not fair! What if I want to walk with her?”

“Are you all really incapable of ever shutting your mouth?”

And then, a slighter demon with indigo-grey hair is at her side, zipping to her at incredible speed. His hands, delicate and pale, proceed to encircle Freya’s left arm. She is subsequently yanked to him, hot breath washing over one cheek as he speaks with a laugh.

“What Freya isn’t saying is that she really wants to walk with me, rig—“

The sharp sound of her hand across his face is a gunshot, a cannon explosion which detonates all around them.

The amethyst-eyed demon balks, mouth wide open, the unending indigo of his gaze flaring to life at the assault. He staggers where he stands, dazed, not by the pain itself but because of the shock. 

Everyone else is frozen as well, varying expressions of horror and fear etched onto their faces. No one steps forward to stop or restrain her, and Freya sways from the force of her own attack, though she orients herself at once. And then, without an ounce of hesitation, she tenses again, all of the muscles in her body rigid with fury.

The opposite hand slams into the demon’s face, palm and fingers hard against him. Her knuckles collide with a delicious impact, and a fodder of gasps dissolve into the air. The demon stumbles, just once, his back foot catching on the ground to steady himself.

But she is already vaulting, clinging to the demon’s body as they both crashed to the ground with a painful thud! Straddling his waist, Freya cocks her fist back and prepares to strike and strike and strike. She doesn’t realize she is screaming until the grass beneath her is shivering from the force.

“Don’t,” she hisses, green-and-black eyes flaring with rage. “Do not ever touch me!”

Belphegor doesn’t move. He lays there, soft, cultivated clumps of vegetation cradling his back and legs as they remain unnaturally still. Like before, the others are frozen as well, though Freya sees Lucifer shift from the corner of one eye.

Her head whips to the side. “Stay,” she snarls. Lucifer’s face goes blank with surprise.

The command itself is profane… she does not invoke the pact between them, however, the afternoon air vibrates heavily with magical warning.

Freya turns back to Belphegor, who eyes her warily. “I’m sorry,” he murmurs, so quiet is his voice. She can feel every modicum of attention seeping into her skin, but it is an afterthought.

Nothing but fire and red and blood and tears and fury broils inside her. She needs an outlet… has needed an outlet, but was too burdened by the weight of Diavolo’s request. 

He’d wanted her to help reintegrate the youngest brother back into the fold, to mend the bridge shattered long ago by hate and pain–to help prepare Belphegor for RAD’s exchange program and the future humans it would bring into the Devildom, whether that last condition was implied or not. It hadn’t mattered. When Diavolo asked you to do something, no questions were to be asked.

In all of this time, Freya knows that there’s been zero regard for her in the process. Nobody has batted an eye or worried about her acclimating back into the fold. After all, she was the one who’d been killed. She was the one who had DIED.

Freya can’t see the Devildom’s constellations above her anymore, can’t see how each alien star shivers with anticipation. Her head is too bowed, too hunched, too coiled over in fury. She never once takes her eyes off Belphegor, who remains still beneath her legs and waist.

“How does it feel?” she near-mumbles, placing a shaking hand on top of his throat. “How does it feel to be incapacitated by someone you thought you knew?” She lightly squeezes his throat with her fingers, though not enough to cut off his supply of air.

Mammon’s voice immediately sounds off behind her. “Freya, c’mon, kid… knock it off.”

A reactive growl builds in her throat at the sound. “Funny how protective you lot are when you want to be,” she nearly spits. Belphegor holds her gaze regardless, the amethyst in them swirling limply. He does not attempt to fight back.

“I asked you how it felt,” she prompts him.

Beel. “Freya—“

“It hurts,” Belphegor finally answers. “But I can’t say that I blame you. After all, I did much worse than this in the end.”

Freya’s eyes narrow dangerously at him. “Yes, you did.” She considers him thoughtfully for a moment, her head slightly cocked.

“I’m not strong enough to crush your throat the way you crushed mine.”

At this, Belphegor pales.

“But, you are.”

Her heterochromic eyes flash with a ripple of magic, glinting in the lowlight of the always-full moon and its rays. The hand upon his neck is suddenly replaced with one of his, snapping up and gripping his own trachea under the authority of her wordless, magical command.

“All right,” Lucifer snaps. “That’s enough!”

“No!” Belphegor croaks, expression blown wide open. “Leave her alone.” His eyes nervously dart back to Freya’s. “This is what I deserve.”

She sneers at him. Tangles of raven-black hair obscures much of her face, blocking most of the hateful glare she throws at him. Then a pause so quiet, Freya thinks she can hear the creaking of everyone’s jaws tightening up. “You crushed my throat with your bare hands. Did you know that before dying, I was choking on my own blood? That you squeezed so hard, I couldn’t even cough it back up again?”

The trembling spread to the rest of her, until her whole body shuddered with rage.

“You deserve much worse than this, Belphie. You deserve to die, like I did.”

A thick, gray silence smogs over them and for a moment, Freya’s expression falls, eyes and mouth slackening with the beginning of grief.

“B-But…” Leviathan stammers, “It was the other you who… died… right?” The atmosphere seemed to flicker with an unseen shock which wrapped all around them. “You existed separately from the Freya who… right?”

Freya could practically feel the brothers’ horror, sharp as a whip, crack through the air. She peered into each of their faces, wordless, speechless at the obvious fear clutching ahold of them.

“Did you truly not know?” A whisper. Her eyes close, not wanting to remember, but feeling a blade in her chest regardless. 

Another oversight. Another betrayal. Her teeth bare themselves of her own accord, and she was sure that if she were truly a demon, black wings would punch themselves through the back of her school uniform.

“I am the one who died. I remember the pain,” she murmurs, eyes drifting closed once more. “I remember the cold, the white-hot bonfire in my chest as I struggled to breathe… I remember the taste of my own blood, my throat crushed beneath two, steady hands… his laughter…”

The wordless confusion in the air screamed out, silently breaking against each of them.

“And then I passed on,” she said simply, shoulders shrugging up. “And my consciousness merged with your version of Freya. Past-me.”

The wind yells too, tossing her raven-black hair around her cheeks. “So… yes, I remember.” Freya’s voice grows dark, angry again. “I remember it all.”

“Fuck, Freya,” Satan breathes. His expression twists, a sliver of desperation flashing in his emerald eyes. “We had no idea.”

It may have been new information, but the reveal is entirely unsurprising. Freya knows how much the brothers love her. She can feel it, the magic of each pack humming through her veins. The brothers have become a literal part of her entity, and so she knows that they’d never abandon her if they’d known.

But they didn’t. And she’d been alone in life, just as she was in her death.

Hot, wet tears prick at the back of her eyes, but Freya denies them, forcefully shoving them back from where they came. This was not the time to leave herself vulnerable, no matter how much she wants to cry and heave and mourn in their arms.

She is far too angry for that.

Her jaw flexes underneath the river-waves of her hair, then loosens as her brows lower.

“You could have asked,” she says. Her voice is a hollow-boned knife. “I needed you guys to be there, but instead I was told to help him.” Her green and black eyes snap back to the demon she still straddled.

“The demon who killed me.”

The brothers are frozen again, seemingly locked into place as she speaks. 

“I hate you,” she says to the youngest brother. “I wish you were dead. And God fucking knows that I am tempted to make that real.”

Belphegor remains silent, hands by his sides, visage ghostly white and stoney throughout her monologue. Freya has never seen him this way before. Not even when she came back to life. Not even when she found out that they were practically family. This was the face of a man afraid, and there is a raging, lava river inside of her that roars with gratification.

Maybe she really is becoming a demon. However… she grits her teeth, peering down at her murderer with magic swirling in her eyes.

“But I’m not like you,” she sneers, eyes and voice hard as knives pinned to rock. “I don’t kill people because of a mood swing or because it’s funny.”

The burning prick of tears surfaces again.

“I don’t kill people and call them exquisite while they die in my hands.”

Everyone flinches.

And then she is on her feet quickly, ripping herself from Belphegor’s body as if it is poisonous to her very flesh. They hold eye contact, the surrounding brother’s attention thick and viscous, sticking onto them both and waiting. One corner of Freya’s mouth twists, like it can’t decide whether to smile or scowl at the injustice of it all.

“You are a literal Prince of Hell, Belphegor. Fucking act like it, hm?” 

But she leans down, slowly shuttering the space between her face and his. He, who still lays fearfully on the ground beneath her. 

“The next time you think about coming for me,” she breathes, “you just remember the woman you chose to bind yourself to.” 

Then her eyes unexpectedly flare, the wild magic in them releasing with all of the rage quivering along her body. Belphegor flinches, his mouth opening in horror as her irises glow brightly, unnaturally, and twist into a vivid amethyst.

The same color as his own. 

Glaring. 

Unmaking. 

A predator yearning to eat.

[whatlovelybones-if]

Idk the trans twin Thing kinda makes sense. I mean our twin is obvi a sociopath (psychopath?, i alway get em confused) and is trying to emulate feeling and social normality. Like with the bird and they "apologized". If only, they apologized cause it upset the MC and they knew that was bad. And according to the story line the MC is also the prefered twin amongst the whispering employees on the estate. So if the MC is trans, maybe or scociopathic twin trys to copy the MC to the best of the ability vause the MC is "better" than they are.

you hit the nail right on the head for most of it, dear bonnie! aside from the fact that they’re identical, MC’s twin was definitely the black sheep of the family. they tried imitating the MC in many ways, both subconsciously and purposefully. these included: trying to dress like them, act like them, switch places with them (with the MC’s consent), just to try and see how people would treat them if they weren’t... well, themself.

the trans option is a bit different tho, as in the twin did feel gender dysphoria whenever they were treated according to their biological sex and always felt comforted when people did otherwise. maybe it was the weird twin-link that they shared, maybe it was something else. the answer will remain a mystery.

[djinnandtea]

so I got some interest on this post where I tossed out that I wanted to talk more about monster romance and race and gender. it's been really nice to see a few folks are also wanting to hear/talk about it! I'm not prepared to say anything at length [eta: this turned out to be kind of a lie] with any certainty or research to back me up, but I thought I could post a rough outline of sorts of what I'd want to research and explore further, just as a starting point for myself but also a jumping off point if anyone else has any thoughts or resources.

I guess I'll start with gender first. I'm new to the romance genre generally, but I don't think it's a surprise that the genre has always been dominated by discourse around who reads romance and the kind of gender dynamics presented in a lot of conventional romance books (which are generally heterosexual/heteronormative in a lot of problematic ways). I'm thinking of the harlequin romances my mom and grandma used to read, but also of the discussions around colleen hoover's work and then the dark romance sub-genre too.

this means that there's the obvi discussion to be had about content vs. context. who is writing the romance, what informs their writing, what messaging comes through via choices made by the author, as well as by the context the author is writing in. I'm sure if you've been reading romance--even fanfic--for a while, you're well versed in some of these conversations, even if just in a casual way.

after considering romance on a macro level, I think you'd then have to look at some of those more micro sub-genres. where are gender norms accentuated and exaggerated, and to what end? why is dark romance a thing, why do (usually) straight white women want to fantasize about being in that kind of relationship? what's the purpose being met? (this is all asked non-judgmentally, btw, as I also enjoy dark romance.)

and maybe there are folks who would dislike my comparing of monster romance to dark romance, but I do think the two are related, especially based on a lot of posts I've seen since joining this corner of tumblr. I think there's a lot of interest in exploring ideas around control and dominance that dark romance and monster romance provide contained space for. if you watched my YouTube video, I touch on this a little bit more at the end as well.

I'm sure I'm missing a lot re: gender (like all the stories being told about lgbtq+ MCs), but this is just some initial thoughts at the fore of my brain.

as for race...........well. lol.

there's the very surface level question around what percentage of monster romance FMCs are white. I genuinely don't have this answer, and I know there are a lot of nonwhite FMCs too! but I'd be really curious to know the actual numbers here. why? well, bc diversity matters. but also because of the decades long narratives around white women as victims of men of color, and how that narrative has been used to weaponize whiteness and demonize blackness specifically, and non-whiteness more generally.

I am def not saying that all monster MMCs = depictions of non-whiteness, I'm just thinking about the connections between equating non-white people/bodies with monstrosity. I'm thinking of the historical framing of non-white people and communities as sub-human, as savages, as beastly. inhumane. monsters have kinda always been a metaphor for the other, including the non-white other, and I think it'd be naive of us to assume that vestiges of that brand of racism (which is still alive and well) never inform the ways creators engage with monster romance and monsterfucking, consciously AND unconsciously.

I'm also thinking about orientalism. I'm thinking of the exotification and classification of the east. the way westerners invaded the eastern world and began treating the people there like specimens. I'm thinking about how othering and abjecting and exotifying a culture or community or person can create a power-informed version of sexualizing that culture or community or person. like, othering/abjecting/exotifying can lead to creating a perverted sort of desiring. I have a special interest here because I'm arab, so this stuff feels particularly personal, but yeah. it makes my wheels turn.

there's also a dehumanizing element of turning an othered body into a piece of sexual meat. I'm thinking about the way monsters in these books are always excessive, the way their penises are always massive. we can't pretend that doesn't seem a little familiar to the degrading ways white people have also discussed black bodies, too. like. I'm not saying wanting our monsters to have big dicks is racist, I'm just saying there are some aspects of the genre that I think deserve to be ~unpacked~ and considered in a wider context that takes this kind of stuff into account. not as a confirmed given, but as an avenue worth approaching with curiosity, if only to point out the ways in which it's NOT a product of racism/anti-blackness.

obvi this post is not backed up at present with a single source because I'm just thinking out loud based on stuff I've read previously over the years that I definitely would need to revisit, so I totally get if you read this and think I'm being ridiculous. but if you saw my first post and were kinda wondering what I had in mind when making it, this is it.

[hollyhomburg]

Seeing your responses to asks about the new chapter and just general questions it brings up- I’ve been intending to ask, and feel free to not answer this ask at all if it spoils anything and stuff, but like,

why are moonbyul and her pack so intent on ‘getting’ the mc? I remember you said once upon a time that if she joined their pack she would probably of ended up being used for moonbyul to have kids or something? So I don’t get why she’s so intent on pursuing her. I thought for a moment it might’ve been because she actually went ahead of plan and killed the don and beta- like it made moonbyul interested in her in a sense of ‘I wonder if I could make you do this stuff for me, rather then yourself’ or something- she seems a little like the type to want her omegas all obsessed and stuff which like,, creepy but you’re kinda hot so whatever

Along that line, I also don’t get what her endgame is with how you said Hyein contemplated killing Jimin. Sure Mc would leave the pack for their safety but she would just end up hating moonbyul and her pack from something like that. So if the end goal is a sort of ‘ownership’ that’s honestly not how to go about it

If that spoils then don’t worry about answering obvi lol but it’s just a question that plays on my mind from the new chapter that I kinda wanted to get out- even if you can’t answer this for spoiler reasons I hope you can enjoy knowing that one of your readers are set into deep thinking from your really intricate writing lol <3 love ya and your writing li, thank you so much for all you do for us fans - you’re such a dedicated and thoughtful writer and seemingly person from what you put through on here with your fanfic and other random posts, I hope you know we appreciate you!!!

oh okay so, maybe this is not as obvious as i thought it was but ;-; it's mostly because of three reasons,

1. because of the m/c's addictive slick, moonbyul's alpha and other alphas in general can kind of 'sense' that the m/c has this, it's mostly phermonal.

2. Because moonbyul and hyejin collect omega's, hyejin was moonbyuls first addition to her collection in a way but after she came along they very quickly got the other too. it's a power thing, the m/c is both veulnerable and beautiful. most alphas, moonbyul included- view the aquisition of omegas and many omega's as a status symbol. for the same reason why hoseok's coeworkers tease him for having so many alphas in his pack- it's kind of a societal norm that an alpha in possession of a good fortune will have several omega's, especially in certain circles.

3. They want to posess her as of right now in the story in part because it was kind of an understood position of them helping her escape geumjae/kill the don and beta that they would get her in their pack as a result. they wheren't just helping her and usuing her, they where manipulating her towards their own ends. after she killed the don and beta this got even more kind of validated- because moonbyul is the one who kept the m/c from being killed. in her mind- she owns the mc, regardless of yoongi's mating mark.

(this next section is vaugely spoilery) you're right in saying that "Sure Mc would leave the pack for their safety but she would just end up hating moonbyul and her pack from something like that. So if the end goal is a sort of ‘ownership’ that’s honestly not how to go about it" thats exactly why moonbyul DIDN'T order hyejin to kill jimin. she knows that if they do want to get the m/c, they'll likely need some collateral or something more to convince the m/c to be theirs willingly, the endgame with them is not physical captivity, it's emotional captivity. hyejin and moonbyul contrasted with geumjae- are much more interested in mentally fucking up the m/c than actually physically harming her through physical abuse. it's a delicate situation.

aghhh thank you for apreciating it in all its intricacies! i know sometimes it might feel like it's too intricate, at least we're not just frustrated right? i'll answer your questions for as long as i can.

[mermaidsirennikita]

best kisses of all time iydm?? I think about the midnight library kiss in what I did for a duke at least once a week<3333

they are sensual enough i guess but nowadays I just don't see some good old, toe curling, actually romantic, a kiss for the sake of the kiss-kiss you know? the kind that racks a havoc in the very being of the mcs?? ahhh the good old days

Anyway thats the ask, thank you❤❤❤❤

For sure, yes! I will say, because I often say it... Lady Chatterley's Lover has one of the best onscreen kisses of all time.

Anyway:

Mafia Madman by Mila Finelli. I think of a kiss in this book a lot, because while these two have a lot of SEX, they don't have a lot of tender kissing or like, loooovemaking type sex. There's a scene where the hero has a panic attack, and the heroine helps him breathe through it, and they start having sex, and I think she calls him baby during or something (and it's also the first time they've had sex with her on top) and he like, grabs her and kisses her... it's so good.

Regarding the Duke by Grace Callaway. This is recent, but it's their first kiss in flashbacks, and he's all cold and calculating and trying to seduce her into marrying him for her connections, and she's sweet and gentle, and it's like... so good... When they kiss for the first time and it kinda goes out of control and he's like "SHIT".

Dreaming of You by Lisa Kleypas. There's a really passionate kiss around the line where Derek tells Sara that sometimes, he wants to punish her a little... And he's basically like "you need to stay the fuck away from me" but we all know he's falling in love with her, and he can't resist kissing her.

Heated Rivalry by Rachel Reid. The kiss during the scene where Ilya is like "oh let's like chill and have an snack after sex", which turns into a handjob lol, but it's like the first time they really start getting EMOTIONALLY intimate (and the first time they switch out of using last names only), and you see the horror of FEELINGS happen.

American Queen by Sierra Simone. I really love the angsty ferris wheel first kiss between Embry and Greer because it does feel kind of doomed? Like, you're very "oh nooooo this is baaaad" because of the setup you've already seen and what you as the reader know that they don't know, but you're also reading so fast because the tension has been building and it all feels so fated.

And though it's not from their perspective, in the same book the mistletoe kiss between Ash and Embry is. SO. GOOD.

Lothaire by Kresley Cole. The kiss when Ellie is all "fuck you dude I'll make you yell to the rafters" (she does) and during they get really out of hand and start making out and he bites her lower lip and it starts bleeding... and as she withdraws he's like "she is going to lose her shit and run away", kind of WANTING that to happen because he's an asshole and is losing the upper hand... But she basically smiles at him through the blood and kisses him HARD. It's the entire relationship in a kiss.

When the Duke Was Wicked by Lorraine Heath. The first kiss in this book is one of those "he has many emotions including jealousy and can't stand it so he grabs her and kisses her" moments... and he feels so bad about it... and she's so pissed at him... and it's incredible. Waking Up with the Duke also has an amazing first kiss, especially because after that Jayne demands that, though they'll be having sex, there CANNOT be any more kissing. Because the kissing is Too Much.

Thief of Shadows by Elizabeth Hoyt. The masked kiss, which very much gives HARD Sam Raimi Spider-Man vibes.

Devil in Winter by Lisa Kleypas. The kiss while their hands are still tied, obvi obvi lol. I also love the first kiss in Seduce Me at Sunrise so great, because Kev can't stop himself (common Kev skill issue) and it's so angsty and so passionate and Win just leaves the country right after because he won't just put it in her, basically.

Between the Devil and Desire by Lorraine Heath. Olivia goading Jack into kissing her by being like "and that's what I DON'T want you to do" because she knows he does the opposite of what she tells him to lol.

The Duke Gets Even by Joanna Shupe. The first kiss in the ocean when they're strangers and he tells her to pull his hair harder. It sets the tone in every way for the rest of the book.

[wrongcaitlyn]

okay so ‼️TW‼️ for this ask and off you do not have to answer or read it if you don’t want to please stay safe!

so. i think once in tyt there was a short reference to nico being suicidal and having self harming/self destructive behaviors. i believe maybe it was after he had to jump off the balcony? and will was like “nico did you do that on purpose” and he’s like “no” and it’s “he kept thinking of the time will caught him” or something like that i’m sorry i can’t look at it rn!

BUT

I was wondering if we’re ever going to get an expansion on that or just any mention of it in general.

me personally i would love too see some scar representation but ofc it is your fic and please don’t feel pressured into anything! i totally get if you don’t want to include anything about this.

and i’m very sorry if this made you uncomfortable or that this was triggering for you.

have a good day! and plz don’t feel rushed to respond! ❤️

yes! you are remembering correctly, and do not worry, this isn't uncomfortable/triggering at all to me! in fact, that's actually one of the reasons it wasn't expanded on - i have no experience with self harm/ thoughts of self harm/ being suicidal, and so even though i made those vague references, i felt very unsure about diving any deeper.

also, i started writing this fic when i was still pretty new to writing in general (or at least, i used to write a lot, and then i took a pretty long break, and then i came back with some one-shots, and this was my first really long project in quite a long time), and so i was just really,,, idk not insecure but i was overly cautious about making sure that i wasn't writing anything wrong, especially because i was writing about things that i had no experience with. like, my family's pretty alright, nowhere near abusive, no alcoholics, and despite the depression my mental health's pretty alright, at least at the time i was writing this - and, obvi, the main thing was that i'm not trans, and yet i was writing a trans mc coming from a very abusive household.

so with all of that, i dropped in these references to his freshman year, and very purposefully didn't start in freshman year because i knew that i wouldn't be able to write that accurately (or, at least, i didn't want to risk writing it inaccurately and portraying these very serious topics in a way that might trigger/offend people who do struggle from these things) and started off the fic in a time where nico was mostly in a much better mental state than the year before, but still struggling with those problems - just not as severely(?) as before.

i'm honestly considering/have been considering going back and editing talk your talk (the og fic) just because i think i've grown a lot as a writer while writing that, and there are a lot of, firstly, tiny grammatical errors, and some scenes that i would like to restructure/fix. i might be able to start that this summer, we'll see!

but ANYWAY to answer your question!! i honestly hadn't thought of going more into that, even though i am adding some more detail to nico's current mental health issues/his ptsd. i'm not completely sure about going into *detail* of it, because of the aforementioned reasons; i just think that these kinds of topics are very sensitive and it's not like the kind of stuff you can just, like, google and understand. if i were to add more about sh/past suicidal thoughts, i would definitely want to do more research/look up accounts of people's experience of it, because i'd want to make sure that i'm writing it correctly and not in a way that would just brush aside any of the details, yk?

i also think that, in a way, nico has completely blocked out that time of his life. it was very dark, and he's experienced even more trauma after that, and so it's just something that he tries really hard to avoid/not think about - even though i do think that he talked to mr. d about it at some point.

so the answer, to be honest, is that i don't know, but it's leaning toward a no. now that i think about it, though, i'm not entirely sure if it's realistic for me to just drop that toward the beginning and then never have nico think about it again- so i would have to do more thinking on the topic! thank you so much for bringing this up to me because even though i do remember mentioning it, i never really think about those early chapters anymore, which dealt with some pretty heavy material, even though i tried to stay very vague about it all.

i think that i'll try to include it at some point, and i do have a scene kind of forming in my head that i think i could put it into, but i don't think it will be very detailed, probably staying in the same lane as everything else that i included in the early chapters of talk your talk! thank you for the ask!!

[mydemonsdrivealimo]

You know, I'm a lurker here, I used to spend a lot of time on tumblr, loved Choices, specially Open Heart. I also wrote lots of fanfics, with Bryce as MC, and today I logged in and... Can I just say how sad it made me read about Bryce having depression? Sad but also understood, because you read his character so well. Everyone writes him so simple, charming and non-chalant, happy-go-lucky; without realising he has a lot of issues. The thing with his parents it's BIG. The thing with Keiki is real stuff, but everyone writes him as if he just cares about his hair and surgeries, but he's more than that. So you writing about Bryce struggling, having his house a mess and not being able to do anything for it, and having a partner that helps him with it without recriminations... It just... Made my heart swell. It's what my MC would've done, because they have struggled pretty serious too. So. Yeah, thanks for this, for giving him humanity even if he's just a goddamn Choices' character. Bryce deserves the world. Deserves being supported in difficult times, so thank you for showing him in such a true light 🤍

have been screaming over this all morning bc YOU GET IT!!!

"even if he's just a goddamn choices character" THIS IS WHAT I MEAN. he is a short lived character in a mobile story app that is currently in its downfall. but he's the character i, and others, choose to write ab. choose to create for nearly every day. even though he IS just a choices character, what he represents, to me, is more than that. his character had so much potential (more than pb probs meant to give him) and like. i needed to do something w it

i am the first person to say a character has to have some good trauma for me to truly enjoy them, and he is exactly that. he has a fucked up family and somehow he came out of that "unscathed"? like all he is is a pretty surfer boy w good hair and obnoxious confidence? no!! that is coping baybeee. he is literally hated by so many people in canon and truly does not have many close friends besides mc. like. his character is SET UP for this shit. yeah im gonna pack him full of issues bc he HAS THEM!!

his dysthymia is a super important part of his story (in my hc) bc it is so easy to mask. he puts on a confident face for everyone all the time bc then they don't ask questions. but being at home alone all the time? being independent since 17-18? separating himself from his family so suddenly that it becomes habit for him to avoid the potential for that closeness again? it's gonna hurt him

and on top of that him being demiro is very hard in relationships bc most people dont get it so even in that sense it makes it difficult for him to make connections. people would rush him into relationships he didn't really care about so yea it was gonna crash and burn. obvi

so to have an unknown like that where all of his friends are possibly leaving including the only person he's every truly wanted in both a sexual And romantic way? not gonna go so smoothly for him

[yeyinde]

Do you have any wips you could give us hints about? No pressure obvi just Love your work and always so excited to get home from work and refresh your page to see what you and others are thinking

hiya! of course! i'm always happy to share, and thank you so much!! 🖤

i'm working on a few things at the moment: a lot related to Price - single dad Price x teacher Reader (multi-part), Price x MC x Soap smut, NSFW & SFW Alphabet for Price, part 2 of moaning his name out in the shower, sugar daddy Price (also multi-part) (omgggg, someone send help pls); Ghost x Reader (one shot, plus multi-part); and a wonderful ask i've gotten so long ago for Soap that is nearly finished!

i included a bit for the Soap ask since this is the last thing i worked on!

In Greek, there are two words for time: Kronos—chronological, the clock: fixed—measured in seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years. The world runs on Kronos. On its merciless rigidity, it's apathetic, unending trek forward. It's cruel, sometimes, but it cares little for you, or anyone else who exists inside its unforgiving realm. And then there is Kairos. In its essence, and in utter simplicity: timelessness.  It's often found in grief when the world around you shatters and implodes. When it lapses into pain and agony. Into how and why and— Nothing makes sense. Nothing matters. You've never experienced any such loss. Gran, grandad, friends, family—all alive and well. And yet— You're grieving for something, someone—a man with kind eyes and a soft smile like the valley in spring: fresh rain over the boscage in bloom—that you've never met before.  And then you find him.

[luckyqueenreign]

LITG: Double Trouble EP 8 Recap

HERE WE GO!!! spoilers underneath!

ok now that I think of it...with 5 guys coming in for casa I guess we do have the same amount of bombshells for guys and girls. WHOOPSIE!!! still shocked a girl is going home!! and still have no idea who theyre gonna choose 😬

"steady grace...its a public vote. it sucks thinking someones going home" Ozzy are u thinking about mc???

awww Amelia tbh I would be SHOCKED if she was dumped tonight. it cant be double trouble without the double! aww the good old days option is cute...little twin sleepovers, missing prom to sit around eating and gossiping. they seemed super tight...I wonder what happened 👀 OZZY my guy...I love you sm BUT WHY INTERRUPT NOW WHEN SHE CLEARLY NEEDS TO CONFESS SOMETHING TO US??? is Amelia not who we think?!?!? 👀😩🫣

at least it was Ozzy tho, if it were literally anyone else I would be so mad at fb rn...as a Noah girly this Ozzy route is already SO MUCH BETTER. we get the angst, we get the little looks but Ozzy is actually pulling us for chats and letting us know where his head is at. It's confused but still we never got that from Noah. I always felt like I was the one chasing him around the villa. OBVIOUSLY im gonna flirt it up with Ozzy!! eeek sorry grace im moving in for a kiss. OK as much as I hate that he pulled away I kind of love that he's trying to be a respectful king 😭 EEEK Grace 😬😬😬 the worst part about this route really is ruining my budding friendship with grace. I wish Ozzy was coupled with Ivy would be so much easier 😭

Couples Quiz!! Roberto better get every question right since he came in knowing every tiny little thing about us 🙄 awww Ozzyyy 😭😭 Jamals fear being pigeons is so funny to me. slow and sensual...noted Bella! Lewie's a giver....also noted! they needed to bring the toe sucking in at some point...we all knew it was bound to happen and the restrain to only have it in the third volume is honestly impressive ill give fb that.

ahhhh ok fb all the answers were from my chats with the girls earlier got itttt. then Roberto is gonna ace too because he knew everything about mc on the date. Roberto's how do u say it...phallic? now im reading this in an accent and hes even cuter lol 😭 wait whattt lol how did Roberto get that wrong??? A scientist?? the man came in knowing every single tiny detail about MC INCLUDING HER JOB!!! HE MENTIONED IT ON THE DATE THAT IT WAS SIMILAR TO HIS SISTER'S!!! and he cant remember it here??? BOOOOO FB!

of course she picks Lewie for her date....can ivy just go now... obvi going to put her in her place.

EEEK Grace wants a chat.....ugh so not looking forward to this. wait Grace lolol you just came and said Ozzy is pulling away, somethings obvi up with him and I tell you he said he'd be sad if I left and theres something more there and you LAUGH??? lol im sorry but now she cant say I didnt tell her later...

still playing the middle ground with Roberto...did ask him if hes ever been in love..he said once a while ago.

the amount of snooping MC is doing this season is sooo good lol. lets not tell anyone about what happened??? What happened Lewie????

I reallyyyy need an option to skip the getting ready chat. I need it to be MC what are u wearing and immediately show me the closet.

[emersonfreepress]

ho-ly crap

there is space in the game for New Kid to come from a family of immigrants

i... have to figure out how much work and tracking this would be. i also have to figure out how large or disruptive any ripple effects of this option would be on the backstory, major plot, and continuity. but thank fuck i figured it out. and thank fuck i figured it out early 😆

some of you likely know, but I'm the first American born in my family — I'm pretty positive my entire family?? So I never loved that the MC had to have an American background to make them an Emerson local. Had, because I feel very good that I just figured out a completely sensical and natural way to include that. I obvi couldn't get complex about it, what with there being a thousand countries or whatever, but a few painless options are most of what it would take to integrate it into an MC's narrative.

I think.

Anyway, if I'm right, the MC will still be American-born but your parents could be immigrants. Not going to get into more detail than that since this literally just struck me right now while I'm cuddling with my cat on the couch and reviewing notes 😅

but ! 🤞🏾

[atlaskrr]

webtoons I've read recently that i enjoy!

I finally read our walk home! its rlly sweet and i cant wait for it to come off hiatus. i instantly got hooked by the characters. i like how its a they get eo thing and not an actual rivals to lovers thing. idk it feels more special. and the characters mentalities being explored is sooo good man. im also curious on the lot abt the angel and devil + akis brother. on a side note if i were either of them id fold so quickly cause why they both so pretty. their interactions are so cute man. its soft, genuine. i like it.

peace restaurant. love it. was reading it and i was like damn fknally something that gives me what yohaji did (tho not the same obvi) it is only starting on en ver (7 free chaps iirc) and i was so hooked i ended up reading all the kr released chaps on aggregator sites. im so confused and sad bcs it stopped at chap 28 back in nov 2023. still its really good. i love the dynamic between sua, belial and nhedhuk. they are so found fam to me. like nhedhuk is obvi the younger sibling and belial is her older brother. sua is their unconventional mom. speaking of belial his development was really nice. the way his fear was all the ppl he cared abt dying (INCLUDING SUA AND NHEDHUK) im scared abt whats gonna happen with him with how 28 ended off tho 😅 i think i have a thing for op female mcs (ty bofuri) and also this is why for one of the very few times the mc is my fav chara followed closely by the 2 deuteragonists. comedy that grows plot gotta be my new fav thing. in the beginning tho i love how every time you think smth serious will happen its just another gag. anws the whole dimension ordeal is also cool.

ok this thing had me clicking from its artstyle. i think yohaji made me a comedy person cause this is a comedy as well. i continued reading the few short chaps cause it was silly and sweet. this ghost truly is just a kind and pathetic thing. the fact shes mute is also really nice as the creator actually competed twice and placed in silent manga competitions (which were really good btw. go check out volpee). when the managers were introduced i thought plot was coming but nope! but also i was even more hooked cause the design for mr. h??? love. the vibes and style is immaculate. the ghost of cloth is also really silly and has a nice design lol. there was no ep last month but its back on now! oh yeah the toy ghost is really cool as well. somehow they can still make it expressive despite its still face. the whole remote control car situation had me cackling tho lmao.

OH MY GOD PROJECT CAMELLIA HAS LIKE 6 EPS AND ONE IS A AUTHORS NOTE THING BUT DO I CARE??? NO. the pretty boy cover enticed me and im so glad it did bcs it seems so promising. the author note had stuff about their process and the future and the way they thought it through, how the 2 mcs change eo and it shows PHYSICALLY. in love. the way they plan to change the main mc throughout the story has me scared and excited. it seems like they can handle chara development well which is something i value highly as i read for charas most of the time. the art style is also really nice. if you check out the creators insta you can really see how skilled they are like the art there looks majestic (theyre a danmei fan). apparently therell also be a yuri side couple 👀 basically, the future seems bright for this webtoon.

i hust finished catching up to the tl ver of the students of illip arts high cause the en is new to webtoon just like peace restaurant. i was hooked by the unique style used for the vr game and how so yi and han sol bonded and allat. their relationship is so ough to me. dakyung is also a fun chara and for seiun idk she seems kinda pretentious. i dont like how they dealt with eppys chara either. still its early on so even though the charas besides mc seem to not have as much impact as they could it has much room to grow.

[the-ozzie]

wip

Gonna make a hurt/comfort comic based on MC being overwhelmed and stressed with all the stuff she she has to do, and then some of the important characters comforting her in their own ways. Obvi gonna do Sebastian (kicking and screaming), Ominis, and Natty… are there any other characters you think I should include/ would like to see me include..?

[energeticana]

"huh .. turns out being gay IS the same as being rich"

hiiii , you can just call me ana or energetic

pronouns: any

basic dni , other than that everyone's welcome !1!1!!

basic info: i do art and most of my rambles are on here :3

fandoms im in include :

twomp

ahw

rockabye (musical)

ddlc

omori

the amazing digital circus

(psa twomp and ahw are my main fandoms so i might not post abt the other fandoms that often !!!!!!!!!!!!)

(otps: cooliver (ahw) , plargos (twomp) , heromari (omori))

basic info: i like to play games such as acnh , roblox , omori (obvi) , and mc !!!! i also do choir and im learning italian + vietnamese. i rlly like music and my fav music artists include : jack stauber , tally hall , lemon demon , beabadoobee , tv girl, the hot freaks , sodikken , aurora ave. , etc. !!!!! ^_^

other socials where you can find me are :3

insta: @energetic_ana

tiktok: @energeticana

twitter: @energetic_ana

artfight: @Energetic_Ana

other blogs:

rockabye: @marlypso

[silly-plays-p3r]

me seeing the latest post: wait, mitsuru and aki have known each other for years and she didn't know that? how the fuck were they ever a team? (silly feel free to correct me but i got the vibe the 3rd years were specifically close with each other thus the whole thing with shinjiro; am i misremembering?)

No no, you're right anon!

As for her not knowing he likes to doodle (or at least used to?)...... Well.....I thought the scene indicated it was more-so in the past. So I'm guessing he doesn't do it now (or at least as often). And tbh unless he was like....Yusuke or something (wait is this happening because of Kanji/Yusuke.....I'm not going to look into that moving back!), you know an artist. I think Mitsu would've noticed. She's very......perceptive/wary of everyone's needs and that includes Akihiko.

As for the 3rd years closeness. I def think they are close (oh I was going to link to an old post.....did I never post it? hm.....we'll I guess I'll state it here from what I remember).

Shinji/Mitsu I don't see interacting much (most of it is in the PQs or P3R imo). But ShinjiAki and AkiMitsu? Hell YES. I think Aki is ironically the glue for these guys.

ShinjiAki are obvie because of how much the game spends on them. But the MitsuAki friendship???? Oh man....these two are RIDE OR DIE. TT0TT Like they usually understand each other's needs so well.

(more under cut)

I feel like they speak about each other fairly casually, not in the Japanese sense but.....like they just will say stuff about each other "Oh yeah that sounds like them, that's what they like" and it's easier to notice with ShinjiAki cause I feel like it's baked more into the main story and AkiMitsu is mostly optional dialogue.

But the thing that made me super soft for them was when Yukari 1st confronts the group pre Yakushima. And demands to know stuff and Mitsu started almost spilling her trauma.

Mitsu: Anyway not all of us had a choice to fight.... I.... Aki: Mitsuru! Don't.....

This means.....Aki knows about what Mitsuru has gone through. Him not wanting her to spill everything I think he knows how much her own past has hurt her (not just her family's). She was more open talking about her family, and he didn't stop her. But when she almost talked about herself, I think he knew it might be too hard for her and told her to stop for her sake.

Between this and Mitsu covering up Shinji's killing (which I'm sure she feels responsible for not just the death but the cover up as well). And just trying to navigate Ken with Akihiko and keep it covered up..... The fact all three keep it covered up (and Ikutsuki is just...watching with pop corn TT0TT). They def are close.

(I was about to move on but I forgot the other thing!)

So another instance is after Mitsu's dad's death, if you talk to Aki during this timeframe, he legit says "When Mitsu is sad, I'm sad" and Fuuka(?) will comment on how upset he seems. Like this mfer is more upset looking when Mitsu is grieving than when Shinji died. TT0TT I was SO SOFT! My heart was in pieces kldfsaj;fa orz ;aljskfdjaf I still haven't recovered. I went from "yeah I like them they're neat' to "oh god my heart I love this ship gimme more" klfasdfl orz why do they hide all their amazing dialogue in optional convos????? orz orz orz Wait I saved the screenshots cause I was so shooketh! TT0TT

Ahem....ANYWAY!

I feel more for the 3rd year trio and their comradery than....well......the beginning Trio (MCs/Yukari/Junpei). Even the penta 2nd year group (MCs/Yukari/Junpei/Fuuka/Aigis) isn't that strong. Fuuka feels closer to Natsuki than the rest of SEES tbh TT0TT And Natsuki doesn't even get that much screentime u_u

The only trio that comes as close to the 3rd year is the moonlight bridge one (MC/Aigis/Ryoji).

Of course I feel like he game nerfs AkiMitsu's closeness in favor of pushing the bs MitsuYuk*ri friendship narrative >_> I dunno why Aki never approached her......was it helplessness? I dunno it feels weird.

So I guess narratively.....I guess they are kinda like friends who sit in the same room in silence, and then every so often to reveal a random fact about themself and the other is like "Oh wow cool" but they both really like that and thus will hide a dead body for the other person if needed. Like

*Aki/Mitsu/Shinji reading in the lounge* Mitsu: I found a nice cook book recently, would you like it Aragaki? Shinji: .........uh....yeah... Mitsu: Great I'll give it to you later.... *time passes* Aki: I broke a guy's nose at my last meet. Shinji: Good going meat head. Mitsu: That reminds me of when I broke a researcher's nose when I was 10. Shinji: Oh yeah? Why'd you do it? Mitsu: He wanted to test a new drug on me, it made my persona go a bit wild. But we all lived in the end. Aki/Shinji: ........................huh....... *time passes* Aki: I saw some guys bullying that one shrine dog. Shinji: Let's kill him. Kirijou- Misu, getting off the phone: I've already made the arrangements.

I dunno that's kinda the surface level vibe they give off. TT0TT They know A LOT of the key stuff about each other, but don't seem to pry unless the other party starts it.

[lem4n-sh0rk]

Stage 1 (Civilian Mode)

| Stage 2 | Stage 3 | MC Quirk Analysis |

MC's finally here! Ngl this took waaay longer than I expected it to, mostly because I kept going through different iterations, but in the end I ended up with something I'm satisfied with!

Excluding body type (and skin tone obvi), this is how MC/Reader is portrayed in the story— At least concerning their hero costume.

No actual transformation needed to achieve this stage (its just the user in their day-to-day life)

Shark-esq attributes include: gills, sharp teeth, and increased strength/swimming prowess

Though the gills are rather faint and almost unnoticeable, they're very sensitive to things like texture. Skin- tight tops are a no-go UNLESS the midriff remains exposed or at least has enough breathing room, otherwise it's just loose shirts/hoodies/sweaters for you

The scar on the left leg is from MC's twin brother :))