#not for reblogging *glare*

[eldritchsurveys]

1138.

by ausmuh 01. What is the biggest conflict in your life right now? >> Hmm. It’s usually an internal conflict, but I’m not sure what it’d be at this very moment. I’ve been kind of struggling for the past few days (although it started to improve yesterday and today’s been okay so far), but it’s really hard to pin down what, exactly, the struggle is about. I think I’ve just been really tired and not having any alone time last week (Sparrow took a vacation from work) started to get to me. A lot of last week was fun, but I still need time where no one else exists around me, lol. It’s just how I operate. 02. If you could change your current life schedule to incorporate more or less time for certain things, how would you do so? Do you feel like you have a well-structured and well-balanced schedule at the moment? >> I have a lot of time, though. Time is never my problem. 03. Have you ever organized or hosted a viewing party of any sort? If so, for what? >> Nope. 04. What filler words do you find yourself using most often ("um," "you know," etc.)? >> “you know”, “like”, “uhhhhhhh”. I end up using a lot of filler words because sometimes sentences don’t work out exactly the way I need them to. The thought-to-speech mechanism in my head is a little glitchy. 05. When was the last time you felt let down? What were your expectations about the given situation that weren't met? >> I’m not sure.

06. Do you have a hard time doing things the way other people want them done when you have your own ideas about how they should be done? In what types of situations are you more likely to compromise your ideas and in which would you stand by them? >> Most of the time this isn’t a problem because I don’t have to do things with other people often. But yeah, it can be difficult to adapt to how other people do things, particularly because my brain can throw a fit about it sometimes. It’s not so much that I think My Way Is Right(tm) as much as it’s that my brain gets antsy when an established routine or system is upended or broken. If I can manage to corral those knee-jerk responses and gain a feeling of security, then I can usually adapt well enough (especially if the unfamiliar method turns out to be more efficient or more fun or more delicious or whatever). 07. If you enjoy taking and editing photos, how would you describe your editing style? >> --- 08. Do you go out of your way to protect your internet privacy (by using a VPN, etc.)? >> I don’t have a VPN, but I do my best with Firefox (and certain add-ons), adblockers, being very stringent with my facebook usage, etc. I try not to let the despair of “well, they’re going to get my info one way or the other eventually” get to me, because that’s entirely counterproductive. 09. Have you ever been inspired by a celebrity to change something about your appearance (your clothing style, hairstyle, etc.)? Is much of your taste/style inspired by celebrities? If not, what else serves as an inspiration for you? >> No, I don’t think so. I’m not at all inspired by celebrities, because their lives are just... so alien and different from mine. It’d be like being inspired by E.T. lol -- possible, I guess, but kind of difficult to implement in any real way. I just like what I like, it’s not really inspired by anything in particular... 10. When was the last time you felt a friendship was petering out? If a friendship seems to be fizzling, do you go out of your way to try to "save it," or do you accept that it may have just reached its natural conclusion? >> I don’t know... 11. Do you kiss and tell? Does it make you uncomfortable when other people talk to you about their sexual experiences or dating life in detail? >> I’m only uncomfortable when I’m in a group chat and people are just talking about sexual things explicitly just... out in the open. Like, I don’t know any of you well enough to feel privy to those kinds of details, lmao. It just strikes me as strange how open people can be with absolute strangers about that sort of thing, although I realise my perspective is probably just archaic. I don’t mind at all if a friend talks to me about their relationships or whatever, because I feel like that’s far more appropriate in a friendship than in just... casual acquaintanceship. Knowing intimate details of someone’s sex life without even knowing their actual name or anything feels so backwards, is all. 12. Who is your favorite contemporary writer, author, poet, thinker? >> I’m not sure. 13. Are you ever worried that you're "turning into your parents"? >> I can’t turn into my father any more than I already have -- we do share some traits, of course, because that’s inevitable. Some of them I acquired because I valued them (frex. creativity) and most I acquired because they were socialised into me by his behaviour (frex. counterdependence). But I think I’ve done quite well in becoming my own person, especially seeing as how I did it so effectively that he wants nothing to do with me since I’m not anything like the person he wanted me to be. *deadpan* Yay. Success. 14. What are your thoughts on body positivity vs. body neutrality? >> I think body neutrality is the most useful concept for me -- I understand and appreciate what body positivity is trying to do, but I think the whole problem is being so focused on the body in the first place (positively or negatively). I don’t want to have to think about my body at all, aside from practical concerns. I want to just exist and be okay with existing, no matter what my body looks like. I feel like body positivity is just too much attention -- especially the kind that’s like, “everyone is beautiful and attractive!” or whatever, because... I don’t actually care whether other people find me beautiful or attractive (aside from knee-jerk socialised thought processes that my brain has because it can’t help it, it was trained that way)? I care whether people find me worthy of respect and compassion, which is the real issue here. 15. Do you enjoy keeping secrets from people, like having something about yourself that no one else knows? >> It’s not something I do out of enjoyment, it’s something I do out of feeling a need for safety. 

[eldritchsurveys]

1137.

made by sonaatti 1. If you play video games, what do you usually like to play? If you don't play video games, do you like watching others play? If so, what? >> I play single-player RPGs and MMORPGs the most -- Final Fantasy XIV is definitely the game I’ve played the most in the past year, and I also did another Skyrim run. I really like games with customisable player characters the most; I tend to lose interest in games that have an established character (The Witcher 3 is a very cool game! I still get bored of it pretty quickly no matter how many times I try to play it, and it’s largely because Geralt -- as loveable as he is -- is a very established character. I should just read the books or watch the TV show, lol). I also like games where the world adapts depending on the choices you make (high replayability, there), and games with intricate spiritual or divinity-related themes (I really like what Pillars of Eternity did there, and Final Fantasy games are often pretty intriguing on that front too). And then there’s games like Hades, which I didn’t expect to enjoy nearly as much as I do (because games where you die a lot as a rule are usually intimidating and frustrating, but Hades manages to make it a necessary part of how you get stronger and get more Cool Stuff so I feel way less bad about dying all the time, and also the NPCs are so fucking neat and the art style and combat mechanics are both intensely satisfying). The third kind of game I like is games like Journey, which... well, if you’ve played it, you’d know. It’s just beautiful. 2. What are three things you like about nature? >> It is a route to connection; learning about ecology and observing nonhuman creatures provides so much perspective and reminds me of how interconnected everything innately is, despite how disconnected I feel in the human world. That’s really it, like... everything I love about the natural world is summed up by that sentence. 3. In what ways are you a responsible/"functional" adult? In what ways do you feel you aren't? >> I am a responsible and functioning adult in that I use my small income wisely and conscientiously, I try to keep my living space clean and habitable, I take care of myself (physically and mentally) as best as I can, and I try to treat other people and other living creatures as respectfully as possible, acknowledging that they have their own rich internal lives just like I do. The things that I cannot do -- things that other people regard as part of “being an adult” because of social pressure and ableism -- are irrelevant to me. 4. Do you have any interesting facts about your ancestors? If so, what? If not, what about relatives? >> No. 5. Do you believe in spirits? (You can interpret "spirits" however you want.) >> This is a difficult question to answer, because I have no idea where to begin or how to approach the question. I feel like I could better explain my perspective in a conversation, a back-and-forth where more specific questions are being asked and other views (and definitions) are being shared as well. It’s not a “yes” or “no” for me, because “yes” or “no” would tell you absolutely nothing -- but if I had to choose one of the two, “yes” would be the answer I would choose.

6. What do teenagers have right now that you wish you had when you were their age? >> I’m not sure what teenagers have right now that I didn’t have at their age, to be honest. The only thing I can think of is social media, which... yeah, I’m very glad that wasn’t around when I was a teenager. 7. Are there any poems you like? >> There are a couple, but I can never remember what they are when I’m asked. 8. What do you think is missing/needs to be improved in the feminist movement? >> This is far outside my wheelhouse, all I know is that the TERF thing has ballooned out of control on social media at least, and it’s off-putting. 9. How open are you when it comes to talking about sex? (Whether that be your own sex life, sex in general, etc.) >> I have no issue talking about sex, generally. Talking about it personally is a hit or miss, depending, because my relationship to sexuality is fraught and mostly traumatic, and I am functionally asexual (I don’t feel sexually attracted to other humans, I experience libido but I have no desire to seek out another human being for sexual activity, and I find the idea of being sexualised to be unsettling at best at least 98% of the time). Also, because the kind of sex I do have is... well, Inworld, and no one really knows what that means or how that works except some other people that have “Inworlds” of their own. I also connect sex to things like... well, devouring and death and stuff (big Scorpio energy, you know the drill), which is repellant to a lot of people but makes perfect sense to me. So it’s tough. 10. Are you a fan of the horror genre? If so, what are some of your favorite films/television shows/books/etc. that you like? If not, what do you not like about it? >> I am! Maybe one day I’ll try to make a list of faves, but like... it’s hard to remember stuff like that off the top of my head. 11. Do you thiink we're living in a dystopian world? Why/Why not? >> I mean, maybe. I can see why people would say so, but I don’t really think about it too much. 12. Would you commit murder if you knew you could get away with it? >> I don’t know. I have no idea what the emotional or spiritual toll of committing a murder would be, so I’m wary to just say “sure!” or whatever. Also, Hannibal makes murder look sexy and romantic, and I appreciate that greatly, but like... real life ain’t like that, so what’s the point? 13. Which musical artist do you like that seems to surprise people? Why is that? >> I’m not sure. Most of the people that know me in any capacity become aware of my all-over-the-map music taste pretty quickly, I think. I don’t think I ever give off the impression that I only like one type of music. I think maybe it might surprise someone that I still listen to pop music from my childhood (BSB, Britney Spears)? It seems like most people my age “grow out” of that at some point, but I never stopped liking anything I liked back then, I just added way more stuff to my “I like this” list as time went on. 14. Would you rather have the power to resurrect the dead or enter the world of the dead (but you can't interact with anyone)? >> I don’t want to do either. I prefer the concept of being able to dwell in-between -- to see death and life in the same context, to recognise and love the paradoxes inherent, to not make an enemy of transience and impermanance. I want to rejoice in the rest that the dead receive, and regard it as hallowed and desirable, not disrupt it for some whim of mine own. Imagine you’re mega tired and you finally lay down to sleep and you’re sinking gratefully into the pillows and the blankets and drifting off... and then someone comes busting into your room and turning on lights and yelling about something completely irrelevant to you. That’s exactly the feeling I imagine when I think of someone waking the dead.

[eldritchsurveys]

1136.

The Books

January Heavy: An American Memoir, Kiese Laymon The Hunger Games, Catching Fire, and Mockingjay, Suzanne Collins Lost Souls, Poppy Z Brite Oryx and Crake, Margaret Atwood February The Giver, Gathering Blue, Messenger, and Son, Lois Lowry Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear, Elizabeth Gilbert March The Institute, Stephen King My Friend Anna: The True Story of a Fake Heiress, Rachel DeLoache Williams Recursion, Blake Crouch Necrophilia Variations, Supervert Seductive Poison: A Jonestown Survivor’s Story of Life and Death in the People’s Temple, Deborah Layton Dark Matter, Blake Crouch April Brave New World, Aldous Huxley Staring at the Sun: Overcoming the Terror of Death, Irvin D Yalom Diary of an Oxygen Thief, Anonymous May The Poisonwood Bible, Barbara Kingsolver The Phantom Tollbooth, Norton Juster Southern Gods, John Hornor Jacobs The King in Yellow, Robert Chambers

June Wizard & Glass, Stephen King Deathless, Catherynne M Valente July Making Friends With Death: A Field Guide For Your Impending Last Breath (To Be Read, Ideally, Before It’s Imminent!), Laura Pritchett August Wolves of the Calla, Stephen King September Letters to a Young Poet, Rainer Maria Rilke Inner Bonding: Becoming a Loving Adult To Your Inner Child, Margaret Paul October Healing the Shame That Binds You, John Bradshaw God of Love: A Guide to the Heart of Judaism, Christianity, and Islam, Mirabai Starr November The Self-Acceptance Project: How To Be Kind And Compassionate Toward Yourself In Any Situation, Tami Simon A Mountain Walked: Great Tales of the Cthulhu Mythos, ed. S.T. Joshi Running On Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect, Dr Jonice Webb December Venus in Furs, Leopold Sacher-Masoch What If This Were Enough, Heather Havrilesky Number Of Books You Read: 37 Number of Re-Reads: 6 Genre You Read The Most From: Fantasy and nonfiction, I’d say. 1. Best Book You Read In 2020? Or Top 10? >> The Hunger Games trilogy; Heavy; Recursion; Deathless; The Poisonwood Bible; and the Making Friends With Death book were probably my faves. 2. Book you were excited about & thought you were going to love more but didn't? >> Probably Brave New World. I just thought I’d be more interested in it, but it turned out to not really be to my tastes. 3. Most surprising (in a good way or bad way) book you read in 2020? >> Hm... none of them seem really surprising to me. 4. Book you “pushed” the most people to read (and they did) in 2020? >> I don’t do that. 5. Best series you started in 2020? Best sequel of 2020? Best series ender of 2020? >> The Hunger Games was the best series, probably. Considering I fully read only two series. 6. Favorite new author you discovered in 2020? >> Blake Crouch. 7. Best book from a genre you don’t typically read/was out of your comfort zone? >> I think all the books I read are pretty standard for me. 8. Most action-packed/thrilling/unputdownable book of the year? >> The Blake Crouch books, for sure. Southern Gods was pretty captivating, Lost Souls will always be devourable, and once Oryx and Crake took off it really took off. 9. Book you read in 2020 that you are most likely to re-read next year? >> Hmm... maybe Recursion. But, really, it’s too soon to reread anything I read in 2020 just yet. 10. Favorite cover of a book you read in 2020? >> I’m not sure. 11. Most memorable character of 2020? >> Koschei (Deathless) <3 12. Most beautifully written book read in 2020? >> Deathless had lovely prose. Heavy was poetic in its sadness, and Letters To A Young Poet had some pretty lines. 13. Most thought-provoking/life-changing book of 2020? >> Tempted to say The Phantom Tollbooth. :p It’s timeless and always thought-provoking, okay. 14. Book you can’t believe you waited until 2020 to finally read? >> Deathless, since tumblr had been going apeshit about it for a while by then. 15. Favorite passages/quotes from a book you read in 2020? >> I don’t keep track of quotes.

16. Shortest & Longest Book You Read In 2020? >> Letters to a Young Poet (80p) was the shortest, and Wolves of the Calla (931p) was the longest. 17. Book That Shocked You The Most >> I’m not sure any of them shocked me. 18. OTP OF THE YEAR (you will go down with this ship!) >> Hmm. 19. Favorite non-romantic relationship of the year >> Meh. 20. Favorite book you read in 2020 from an author you’ve read previously >> Tie here between The Phantom Tollbooth and Lost Souls. Talk about two entirely different kinds of books, lol. 21. Best book you read in 2020 that you read based SOLELY on a recommendation from somebody else/peer pressure: >> Oryx and Crake. 22. Newest fictional crush from a book you read in 2020? >> Koschei <3 23. Best 2020 debut you read? >> --- 24. Best worldbuilding/most vivid setting you read this year? >> Gonna have to go back to Deathless for this one, I think. 25. Book that put a smile on your face/was the most fun to read? >> Making Friends With Death, ironically. Also, Big Magic. 26. Book that made you cry or nearly cry in 2020? >> I cried through most of Heavy. Some of the Lowry books. Deathless. 27. Hidden gem of the year? >> --- 28. Book that crushed your soul? >> I wouldn’t say that about any of them. 29. Most unique book you read in 2020? >> I’m not sure how to classify that. Many of them are pretty singular, if you ask me. 30. Book that made you the most mad (doesn’t necessarily mean you didn’t like it)? >> Stephen King books tend to do that automatically (especially Dark Tower books, for very specific reasons). 31. How many audiobooks did you read? Which one was your favorite? >> Zero. 32. Did you abandon any books? If so, which ones and why? >> Yeah, but I don’t remember what they were because I only keep track of books I actually read and finish. 33. What books are on your to be read list for the coming year? >> There’s, like, 150+ books I want to read... and that’s just the books I know about... 34. Did you have any reading goals for this year? Did you complete them? >> I set my goal to 50 books, but I basically reneged on it in the middle of the year because I realised I didn’t care to keep up with that sort of thing anymore. So yeah, my total is 37 and I’m happy with that. 35. Do you have any reading goals for the next year? >> Nope. Just to have fun and learn some more shit. 

[eldritchsurveys]

1135.

by ausmuh

1. What's one TV episode that makes you laugh out loud every time you watch it? >> There’s an episode of Person of Interest -- “Number Crunch”, I want to say the episode’s name is? -- where an antagonist slips MDMA into Harold Finch’s drink and then pops something explosive in the microwave and leaves him to his fate. And here’s Finch, dopey and smiling, thinking it’s popcorn in the microwave and sway-dancing happily as he waits for it to be finished (meanwhile, one of his companions has broken into the place to rescue him and is just like “are you fkn kiddin me” lmao). He’s just so adorable in his impending doom, haha. Sigh... I love that show so much.

2. Who's one person you'd like to see a biopic made about? >> I don’t care.

3. Is plot an important aspect of books and movies to you, or do you care more about things like character development, themes, etc.? >> I really can’t imagine a plot that doesn’t include extensive and intricate character development. I guess I just don’t read plot-driven books, or something? I don’t know what a “plot-driven” book is. All the stories I enjoy are character-driven and the characters drive the story along... that’s just how it works for me. I guess I’d need an example of a different kind of story to understand.

4. What song hit you so hard that you remember where you were the first time you heard it? >> Awake O Sleeper by The Brothers Bright was like that. I was living with Hallie at the time. I wish I’d awakened to the bullshit I was dealing with, lmao. Regardless, that song hit me like a ton of bricks the first time I heard it sitting on the couch in the office in that house.

5. What's your "brand" of fictional character, the type you always get attached to (ex., "perky girls with deep-seated mental health issues," "guys who you would want as an older brother," etc.)? >> A few of my brands are “grumpy old magic man”, “probably a trickster god”, and “queer-coded villain”.

6. Are there any conspiracy theories that you kind of believe in? >> Nope.

7. What's the best "fake" song (one that exists only in the world of a TV show or movie)? >> I would name Dethklok songs but those songs are pretty real, lol. They used to have concerts and everything. I can’t think of any fake songs.

8. If you use Spotify, share your 2020 Wrapped! What are your overall feelings about it? Is it what you expected? >> Here’s the playlist link. And yeah, it’s what I expected -- the car playlist skewed a lot of the results, which is why there’s far more MCR and FOB and shit on there than seems logical. But You Ain’t Coming Back by Zeal & Ardor being the number one song is absolutely on point, lmao. I put that song on repeat on several occasions, which is novel for me because I don’t usually do that.

9. What's a film you watched recently that you can't stop thinking about? >> Possessor was wild. Fuckin Cronenbergs.

10. If you’ve been in lockdown/quarantine for most of the year, describe the different “phases” of quarantine you’ve gone through (whether defining them by an obsession you had, what you were doing most at the time, how you felt, etc.) >> I didn’t really have phases. Being forced to stay inside all the time was only different from my normal life in that I couldn’t choose to do anything different, which is the main frustration -- I didn’t exactly go out a lot before, but at least I knew I could if I wanted to (and sometimes I did). But in practice my life didn’t really change all that much, so I didn’t feel as disrupted as most people did. I kept doing the same shit I’d already been doing.

11. The last TV show you watched is now getting a crossover with the last video game you played: what is the unholy abomination that has just been created? >> It’d be fairly easy to recreate Bridgerton in The Sims 4, I’d think, particularly if you have some custom content installed.

12. What's an invention you’ve spent a lot of time wondering about the creation of (ex., "how did hourglass makers decide how much sand was needed and how thin the waist had to be???")? >> I think about that kind of thing randomly, but not extensively enough to warrant notice.

13. If you’re a ~gamer~, what are your top 3 all-time favorite games? >> FFXIV, Journey, and Hades are my current faves.

14. If the pandemic had happened just a year earlier, how different would your life be? >> Well, the wedding would have been cancelled. I might not have gotten to see Phantom of the Opera. 2019 was a good year and I’m really glad it wasn’t ruined by a pandemic.

15. Post a screenshot you particularly like from your favorite film without mentioning the film’s title. >> Nah.

16. Name the movie, book, TV show, etc. that you were most out of step with this year (meaning both the reviews and overall discourse was the opposite of how you felt about it). >> Hmm... I’m not sure.

17. What’s the biggest red flag you’ve ever ignored? >> Oof, just... Hallie’s whole fucking thing, lmao. But at that point I was so used to being treated any old way without care or consideration that I guess it must have seemed more normal than abnormal. Which really sucks. Because the stuff I went through with him is definitely abnormal and when I see other people going through similar things with their partners it’s really eye-opening.

18. What are some albums that “molded your brain” during middle and/or high school? >> My Own Prison by Creed, Something Like Human by Fuel, just... mainly those two. And my various mixed CDs recorded from the radio.

19. Without saying your age, post your favorite film that was released the year you turned 18. >> Hmm... The Jacket was good... Walk the Line too.... oh, Constantine! Fuck yeah! That’s the one.

20. What’s something extremely bizarre you believed as a very young child? >> I’m not sure, but I always think of this one story that this kid tried to convince me of when I was in second grade. He was light-skinned and he said that he used to be dark like me, but he started picking at his cuticles one day and peeled a piece of skin back and it kept going until he peeled all of his skin off and his current complexion was what was underneath. Kids, man... lol

[eldritchsurveys]

1134.

What color shirt do you plan on wearing tomorrow? >> Black. Almost all my shirts are black, and all of my undershirts are. So.

Do you plan out your clothes a day in advance? >> No need.

Do you ever wish you had more money for food? >> I certainly have, when I was destitute. I’m not currently food-insecure, thank the gods.

Do you ever get cravings for food that you don’t have in the house and don’t have the money to buy? >> Yeah, sometimes. Or we’ve run out of it and it’s a few days until grocery trip.

What magazine would you like to be on the cover of? >> No thanks.

Have you ever considered modeling? >> I wanted to be a Suicide Girl for a while when I was younger and didn’t know any better. Other than that, no.

Do you have any significant health problems? >> No.

Which celebrities do you resemble? >> I’ve been compared to Grace Jones and Harold Perrineau, which were pretty complimentary comparisons if you ask me.

What is your favorite type of pants? >> Sweatpants or lounge pants/pj pants.

Do you make the most of every opportunity? >> What opportunities?

When was the last time you did something daring? >> I’m not sure.

When was the last time you went to the doctor’s for a health problem? >> ---

Do you take any medications? >> No.

When was the last time you had a severe allergic reaction to something? >> I’ve never had one.

Have you ever had a life-threatening allergic reaction? >> No.

Do you rest when you feel you need to? >> I have the luxury of doing so now, so yes, I take great advantage of it. Sometimes I’m still in awe of the fact that I even have a bed and bedroom to relax in, so I don’t think I’ll be taking it too much for granted any time soon.

Do you ever worry about not having enough? >> Enough what?

Do you use stickers? >> Sure.

Do you still enjoy suckers? >> The candy? Nah, not usually.

Do you wear slipper socks? >> Yes, when I feel chilly enough.

List five of your favorite foreign foods. >> Meh.

What types of seafood are your favorite? >> All of them, tbh.

Do you have a neighbor that plays loud music? >> We just have loud neighbours in general. Name a kind of sound, we’ve heard it. If it wasn’t for these blessed headphones I probably would have snapped and done something extremely regrettable by now.

How many plaid shirts do you own? >> Zero. Wait, one.

Do you read a lot? >> Yeah.

Do you write a lot for pleasure? >> Not a lot, not like I used to. It’s a lot harder these days.

Are there any vlogs you subscribe to and watch regularly? >> I subscribe to about a couple dozen channels on Youtube.

What are your plans for tomorrow? >> I don’t have any plans. I assume the new dishwasher is coming tomorrow since it didn’t come today, and that’s all I know.

Are you looking forward to next week? >> Not especially.

Who is your favorite person? >> ---

Do you have a favorite pair of scissors? >> I don’t have more than one pair of scissors in the first place.

Do you have any allergies? >> No.

[eldritchsurveys]

1133.

What was the last thing you searched for on your phone? >> IDK, I haven’t used my phone in hours aside from the flashlight function. If you had to choose between going naked or having your thoughts appear in thought bubbles above your head for everyone to read, which would you choose? >> Neither of these is in any way attractive to me. Have you ever walked in on your parents doing it? >> No. After you’ve dropped a piece of food, what’s the longest time you’ve left it on the ground and then ate it? >> I can’t remember the last time I ate something off the floor. Have you ever tasted a booger? >> No.

Have you ever played Cards Against Humanity with your parents? >> No. What’s the first thing you would do if you woke up one day as the opposite sex? >> I mean, I’d freak the fuck out, what do you think I would do? Shit like that doesn’t happen in this world. Have you ever peed in the pool? >> No. Who do you think is the worst dressed celebrity? >> --- Have you ever farted in an elevator? >> Maybe? I’ve been on enough elevators that it’s possible. Do you have a crush on anyone right now? If so, who is it? >> No. Is there anyone you would want to trade lives with? >> No. What are some things you think about when sitting on the toilet? >> I don’t think about anything. If I’m going #2 I’m usually on my phone (reading Reddit or playing Wordcrush or something). Did you have an imaginary friend growing up? >> I had Inworlders as a child just like I do now. Do you cover your eyes during a scary part in a movie? >> Nope. Have you ever practiced kissing in a mirror? >> I don’t think so. Did your parents ever give you the “birds and the bees” talk? >> No. What is your guilty pleasure? >> I don’t have any guilty pleasures. Just pleasures. What is your worst habit? >> I don’t know. Has anyone ever walked in on you when going #2 in the bathroom? >> I don’t think so, unless it was, like, Sigma. We had a pretty remarkable familiarity with each other.

[eldritchsurveys]

1132.

5k Survey LXXXIX

4551. When you are exposed to the artwork (poetry, painting etc) of a friend, family member or aquantance how likely are you to criticize it? >> Not at all likely. I don’t criticise people’s artwork. I prefer to support and encourage people’s artistic endeavours, and see value in all of it. If they’re looking for criticism of some sort, they’ll have to go elsewhere. 4552. Do you mentally reject people? Before speaking to them? >> I’m not sure what this means. Like, do I think, “I’m not going to like this person” before I speak to someone? Sometimes, from either listening to them beforehand or something else about them that repels me. 4553. Are we already living out 1984? >> No, because 1984 was a story. We can only live out 1984 if we were actually inside that story, which I gather we are not. 4554. Sing, now! What did you sing? Can you sing? Are you the next american idol? >> I am not going to spontaneously burst into song for the sake of a survey question. Yes, I can sing. I am not the next American Idol. 4555. Do you like the feeling of a ball point pen being used to draw pictures on your palm? >> Yeah.

4556. Have you ever been airbrushed? >> No. 4557. Are you an elitist? What are you elitist about? >> Not in the slightest. 4558. Are you arrogant? About what? >> I’m not sure where I’m most likely to express arrogance. 4558. Use the two following words in a sentance: ghandi, ford >> No. 4559. Are you trecherous? >> How can a person be treacherous? I am not terrain. 4560. Nam the ten bands you are the biggest fan of:  Name the ten bands who are your biggest fans: >> ---

4561. Are you jolly? >> Not hardly. 4562. What does the world stop for? >> Nothing. 4563. Would you like to reupholster your furniture in camoflauge? >> Not at all. 4564. Would you rather have your own personal live in masseuse or a new car? >> Neither, thanks. 4565. What were you born holding? >> ??? 4566. Big nose, is it ugly or does it give the face character? >> You’ll never catch me calling someone’s features ugly, so. 4567. Name three things you would NOT do, even for one million dollars (tax free): 1 I wouldn’t do anything for a million dollars because I don’t want a million dollars. Next. 2 3 4568. Who has rejected you? Who have you rejected? >> Oh, people. 4569. Natural body odor or perfumes and colognes? >> Natural body smell (”body odor” specifically is the smell of being unclean, so, not that). 4570. Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? >> I’m sure you know. 4571. Who frolics in the autumn mist in a land called honalee? >> I don’t know. 4572. Is anything nastier as a snack than fruit roll ups? >> I loved fruit roll-ups as a kid. I haven’t had one since then, so I don’t know if I’d still like it or not. I do like fruit leather, which is kind of the same concept but with actual fruit. 4573. When you hear someone make a joke about something will you later make the same joke to someone else as if you had just thought it up? What if someone just says something intelligent, would you use what they said later as if you had made it up? >> I don’t like, add a copyright credit at the end of jokes when I repeat them, it’s not necessary. If someone is specifically praising me for my originality in inventing the joke, however, I will say that I got it from someone else. Same with the second scenario. 4574. What's on your pajamas? >> Which ones? 4575. Are people nicer in new york or california? >> --- 4576. Ever think about moving to Alaska to live as a hermit? >> Not seriously. I don’t want to live in Alaska. 4577. You are interested in a potential mate who is already attatched. Do you encourage him or her to leave their current catch or try to find someone all alone? >> --- 4578. Do you play in the snow? >> No. 4579. Do you save a snowball in your freezer to hit someone with in the summer time? >> No, but that makes me laugh. Imagine it’s 90 degrees and someone just reaches into the freezer and pulls out a snowball, lmfao... 4580. What bible story would you like to see acted out by animated vegetables? What vegetable would play jesus? >> No. 4581. Will you be ready for the next alien attack? >> Lmao the NEXT alien attack... 4582. You can't make this easy can you? >> Never. 4583. What is a small thing that people let slide but that actually has dire consequenses? >> I’m not sure. 4584. Are you the open window maniac? >> The what? 4585. Have you ever been a hall monitor? What exactly do hall monitors do anyway? >> No. I assume they check wandering students for hall passes or whatever. 4586. Would you rather wear an army uniform or a cow costume for halloween? >> No. 4587. When was the last time you played tag, musical chairs, hide and seek etc? >> I played hide-and-seek with a child about two years ago. 4588. Can you leap frog? >> No. 4589. What was the last strong and clear emotion you felt? >> Tiredness. 4590. Are you more of a disco ball, a candle or a robot? >> No. 4591. Could any good come out of a nuclear holocaust? >> Ask my Fallout OCs, I guess. I don’t know anything about nuclear annihilation. 4592. Are you an angel in disguise? >> No. 4593. Could you have fun with a jelly fish? for 12 hours? >> ??? 4594. Who throws the wildest parties? >> --- 4595. Do you own an I <3 NY shirt? >> I don’t. 4596. If you could make a channel that played only one show all day what show would it be? >> --- 4597. Are you a rockstar only no one knows it yet? >> No. 4598. have you ever been stung by anything? What? >> No. 4599. Who's autograph have you gotten in the last year? >> No one’s. 4600. Are you enjoying this? >> I’m not not enjoying it.

[eldritchsurveys]

1131.

1 - Were you glad to see the back of 2020? What were the best and worst parts of the year to you? >> I honestly did not care one way or the other. I understand why the ritualistic “good riddance to 2020″ thing works for people, it just doesn’t work for me. In my mind, it really doesn’t matter if it’s 2020 or 2021, just as long as it ain’t fuckin, say, 2009.

2 - If you’ve purchased something you love from a small business, are you likely to leave a review or anything afterwards? Why/why not? >> Yeah, like I just bought a bracelet from an Etsy seller and I left a happy review because I love the product. I never really thought about leaving reviews in the past, but it recently occurred to me that I should probably start doing it for independent sellers like that. This particular seller only had one or two other reviews aside from mine, so you know, it really makes a difference.

3 - When was the last time you received some good news? >> Well, seeing the pending stimulus deposit was good news. It is just enough to pay off the rest of what I owe on my computer, which means I do not have to worry about that anymore. I consider that a great relief, tbh; that $150/mo was no joke.

4 - Does wearing masks cause you to get acne or oily skin on your chin and around your nose? >> Nah. I’d probably have to wear them for much longer periods of time than I usually do for that to start happening.

5 - Do you prefer dogs or cats? Do you have a preferred breed as well? >> Dogs. Pitbulls are my fave breed.

6 - Do you have any plans for the next few days? Are these plans something you’re dreading or looking forward to? >> Mostly I just plan to enjoy having my normal routine back once Sparrow goes back to work (well, until Thursday, because now she’s going to be working from home every Thursday...).

7 - Leggings, jeans, jeggings or sweatpants? >> Sweatpants.

8 - How often do you meet new people? Is this something you’d like to change in any way? >> Not often at all, especially now. I don’t think it needs to be changed right now.

9 - What time did you wake up this morning? Would you rather have slept in longer? >> For the final time, around eight or so. I’m currently in a sleep deficit so I probably could have slept in longer, but I don’t like sleeping in. Maybe I’ll take a nap at some point, maybe not.

10 - What’s your favourite meal of the day? What’s your favourite thing to eat for that meal? >> I guess breakfast, since that’s my most stable and predictable meal most of the time. I almost always have a veggie burger and chips.

11 - When was the last time you visited a zoo or aquarium? What are your favourite animals to see there? >> I think the last time was Labor Day in 2019? The red pandas were pretty novel. I don’t think I have a favourite animal overall, though.

12 - Have you ever bought or sold anything via Facebook? >> No. This just reminded me to check on whether the Buy Nothing group in my city approved my membership, but apparently they did not, and that really confuses me, because... like, I live in the city. Why can’t I join the Buy Nothing group? This sort of thing is so distressing to me, I just... wanted to do a little community participation. :/ 

13 - When was the last time you had to cross a railway line? Was it an automated crossing or a manual one? >> I mean, we cross train tracks whenever we head downtown.

14 - What was the last thing you received as a gift? >> The gift from Sparrow’s parents that was late to arriving, which I got yesterday. It was a wine mulling kit.

15 - Are you a fan of cheese? What are your favourite types? >> I mean, I like cheese. I don’t know if I’d go so far to call myself a fan, though. I like pepper jack, brie, Kerrygold swiss, etc.

16 - What’s your “go-to” hairstyle when you’re feeling lazy or in a rush? >> ---

17 - How do you travel to work or school? Would you rather get there in a different way if you had the choice? >> ---

18 - What was the last activity you did that caused you to be out of breath? >> I don’t remember.

19 - When was the last time you changed your bedsheets? >> About a half hour ago, because they’d just been washed.

20 - What household chore do you hate the most? Are there any you actually enjoy or find satisfying in any way? >> Any “wet” chore -- so, most of the ones in the kitchen and all of the ones in the bathroom. I don’t mind vacuuming/sweeping, dusting, or laundry (I especially like the folding), and I love to tidy up and put things back where they belong.

21 - How much money did you spend the last time you went to the supermarket? >> I, personally, didn’t spend any, but the total grocery bill this weekend was about $170.

22 - How often do you buy fast food or takeaways? What’s your favourite place to get those foods from? >> Not often.

23 - Do you prefer white, brown or granary bread? What other types of bread do you like to eat? >> I’m not sure what granary bread is, but generally I’m not too precious about the type of bread. I’m far more precious about where the bread comes from (locally-made versus mass-produced).

24 - Are you in any kind of pain right now? What’s causing it? >> I wouldn’t say that. I mean, being tired and melancholy can be a bit painful at times, but... yeah.

25 - Can you hear anyone else in your house right now? What are they up to? >> Sparrow is having a shower. IDK what the cat is doing.

26 - Do you find farts funny or gross? >> Neither? They’re completely unremarkable to me, unless someone’s farting a tune or something, which I guess is novel enough.

27 - What are you wearing at the moment? Is anything you’re wearing new? >> Sweats, undershirt, hoodie. My winter uniform. Nothing I’m wearing is new.

28 - Who was the last person you spoke to via social media? Is this a person you’re close to? >> I don’t remember.

29 - Did you ever do surveys on a site other than Tumblr? Do you still take surveys anywhere else? >> Yeah, I was on Xanga for a long time. I had a brief fling with LiveJournal after Xanga went the way it did but ultimately settled on just posting them here.

30 - Are you overweight, underweight or a healthy weight for your height? Are you happy with that or would you like to change it? >> I don’t know which one I am and I’d rather not make a fuss about it.

[eldritchsurveys]

1130.

JANUARY 2020

Where did you go on new year’s?: >> We were invited to a really chill gathering at an acquaintance’s place, and it was a lot of fun. It was a bit of a potluck, and we brought gumbo (and some adult beverages).

Who kissed you on new year’s? >> If anyone did, it would have been Sparrow.

Did you have a New Year’s Resolution this year? >> No, because I never make them.

Does it snow where you live? >> Yes.

Do you like hot chocolate? >> Yes.

Have you ever been to Times Square to watch the ball drop? >> Not even when I literally lived a half-hour’s walk away. It’s the worst kind of event I can imagine.

Is January anything special to you? (Birthdays, Anniversaries, Vacations, etc.) >> Nope.

FEBRUARY 2020

Were you single? >> No.

Who was your Valentine? >> I mean, I have a spouse...

When you were little did you buy Valentine’s for the whole class? >> I did not. Other kids did, I remember it being a thing, but I did not.

Do you care if the groundhog sees its shadow or not? >> No.

What did you receive for Valentine’s day? >> We went out to a cocktails and chocolates event. It was a lot of fun, and also the last thing we got to do before the lockdowns started happening.

What did you give for Valentine’s Day? >> ---

Is February anything special to you? (Birthdays, Anniversaries, Vacations, etc.) >> No.

MARCH 2020

Are you Irish? >> No.

Do you like corned beef and cabbage? >> I’ve never had that exact meal, but I do love cabbage in general.

What did you do for St Patrick’s Day? >> Nothing.

Are you happy when winter is pretty much over? >> I am always very happy when winter is over. Unfortunately, that’s a little later in the year around these parts (try late April, at best).

Is March anything special to you? (Birthdays, Anniversaries, Vacations, etc.) >> No.

APRIL 2020

Do you like the rain? >> Sometimes.

Did you play an April fool’s joke on anyone this year? >> No.

Do you get tons of candy for Easter? >> No.

Do you celebrate 4/20? >> No.

Do you love the month of April? >> I don’t have any feelings about it, but I do like that you can really feel spring on the horizon by April.

Is April anything special to you? (Birthdays, Anniversaries, Vacations, etc.) >> No.

MAY 2020

What is your favorite flower? >> Sunflower.

Finish the phrase “April showers…”: >> I’m sure I don’t have to.

Do you celebrate May 16th: National Piercing Day? >> Nope.

Is May anything special to you? (Birthdays, Anniversaries, Vacations, etc.) >> Yeah, my birthday.

JUNE 2020

What year did/will you graduate from high school? >> I graduated in 2004.

Did you do anything fun during this Month? >> Nope.

Have a favorite baseball team? >> Nope.

Is June anything special to you? (Birthdays, Anniversaries, Vacations, etc.) >> Nope.

JULY 2020

What did you do on the 4th of July? >> I don’t do anything on the Fourth of July, it might as well be any other day to me.

Did you go to the fireworks? >> Of course not. I hunkered down in my room and prayed for it all to end.

Did you blast the A/C all day? >> We usually don’t blast the A/C, except when Sparrow sleeps in the living room on hot nights (the A/C is in the living room). I don’t fare well under A/C long-term.

Is July anything special to you? (Birthdays, Anniversaries, Vacations, etc.) >> No.

AUGUST 2020

Did you have a sunburn? >> Certainly not.

Did you go to the pool a lot? >> No.

Did you go out of town? >> Funny kind of question to put in a 2020 survey. Unfortunately, the answer is yes, because we did go to a different town to go to this one restaurant because Sparrow’s niece was visiting... idfk. I just know it sucked and I thought it was a stupid idea the whole time.

Is August anything special to you? (Birthdays, Anniversaries, Vacations, etc.) >> No.

SEPTEMBER 2020

Are you attending college/school? >> No.

Do you like fall better than summer? >> By the time fall hits, I do. But I love summer too, it just gets old after a few months.

What happened this month? >> Nothing that I can recall.

Is September anything special to you? (Birthdays, Anniversaries, Vacations, etc.): >> No.

OCTOBER 2020

Whats your favorite candy? >> I like this mango hard candy that has chili and sea salt on the inside.

What was your favorite thing(s)about this month? >> In 2020, nothing, really.

What are you planning to be for Halloween? >> The fact that this is future tense makes me reconsider my assumption that this survey was about 2020 and not just... about months in general and “2020″ is just there for some reason...

Are you going to be trick or treating? >> I don’t trick-or-treat.

Is October anything special to you? (Birthdays, Anniversaries, Vacations, etc.): >> Wedding anniversary, Sparrow’s birthday.

NOVEMBER 2020

Whose house do you go to for Thanksgiving? >> On normal years, Sparrow’s parents’.

What are you going thankful for this year?: >> Meh.

Do you love stuffing? >> I do, but only if it’s got some texture and isn’t just mush. I hate it when people actually stuff the turkey with it, it’s gross.

Anything exciting happen this month? >> Nope. Oh, there was an election or something.

Is November anything special to you? (Birthdays, Anniversaries, Vacations, etc.): >> No.

DECEMBER 2020

Do you celebrate Christmas? >> I... guess.

Have you ever been kissed under the mistletoe? >> I don’t think so.

Get anything special last year? >> Yeah, I got three books!

What do you love most about December? >> The winter holiday season, usually, but... idk.

Is December anything special to you? (Birthdays, Anniversaries, Vacations, etc.): >> Nah.

[eldritchsurveys]

1129.

1. Which of “life’s rules” do you frequently disregard? >> I disregard the concept of “life’s rules”.

2. Is there anyone that you love to hug, but wouldn’t want to kiss? >> No. 3. What physical feature do you look for in your person of interest? Does it vary based on gender? >> --- 4. Would you ever take boudoir photos for a significant other? (or have you?) >> If I was in a sexual relationship, I suppose. Although the idea of someone just having nude photos of me is unsettling. I’ve heard what happens when a falling-out occurs... 5. What is your biggest guilty pleasure? >> ---

6. Is there an actor or actress whose success can only be contributed to his/her looks and not on their acting skills? >> I don’t know a single thing about acting and I don’t know how to judge whether a person is a “good” actor or not. There are certainly actors whose style I don’t love (I love Keanu Reeves but his nineties work kills me sometimes), but that’s what I call a personal preference. 7. Where would be a terrible place to be caught naked? >> In a petting zoo. 8. What is a movie that you thought you would hate but actually ending up enjoying? >> I don’t think this really happens to me. It’s usually the opposite -- I think I’m going to enjoy a movie (because it’s in a genre I love, or because someone whose work I generally like is involved, or because of the trailer, or whatever) and then it turns out to be lackluster. 9. What do you consider to be a “favor” in the bedroom? >> *blank look* 10. What two words best describe your first romantic encounter? >> --- 11. What is one word that should never be uttered during dirty sex talk? >> I don’t like most things that pass for “dirty talk”, so... my list is pretty extensive, lol. 12. Which of your body parts do you feel needs a little work at the gym? >> Would really rather not think of my body this way. 13. What would be an example of not a very suave move? >> Making a bad joke? 14. If you were to start a catalog of adult products, what one product would you feature on the cover? >> I don’t want to start a catalogue of adult products. 15. What do you love most about your significant other? >> Hmm. 16. What is something that you would buy on sale, even if you didn’t need it? >> I don’t buy anything if I don’t need or want it, sale or not. I can’t even imagine having the money to do stuff like that, lol. 17. What is the weirdest sex dream you have ever had? >> I think most of them have been some level of weird. I say that because I distinctly remember one time waking up and thinking, “wow, that was a remarkably normal sex dream”, lmao. 18. What is the worst way to break up with someone? >> Ghosting them is high on the list. 19. What kind of vehicle would you love to own? >> I would love to never own a vehicle in my life. So far, so good! 20. What is the most expensive thing you hope to buy next year? >> I don’t have anything in mind. I just hope to pay off the expensive thing I bought last year, which is basically what the paltry stimulus check is going to.

[ohsh1t2wksl8]

[eldritchsurveys]

1128.

Who were you with at midnight on January 1, 2021? >> Sparrow, who else, haha.

What was the last thing you drank? Was it in a glass, mug, can, or bottle? >> Rum and cherry Pepsi from a small glass.

Who was the last person to send you a message on social media? What qualities does this person have, that you appreciate? >> Jack sent me a post here on tumblr. I don’t feel like doing the second part, I feel like I have an unnecessarily difficult time trying to parse out why I like people. It’s not something I consciously decide, so I feel like I’m reverse-engineering how and why I get along with people in order to answer questions like this and that’s tiring.

Look around the room and find any red object. What is it? >> The bow around the neck of my FAO Schwartz bear is red.

Do you enjoy any films with Dan Stevens in them? >> Oh yeah, he was in Apostle, right? I hope I’m not getting two different people confused. Apostle was really interesting. I might rewatch it sometime. I think he was also the actor in The Guest, which was... eh.

Is there anything in the room that has your handwriting on it? >> Probably.

Can you name 3 items you own that are pink? >> My water tumbler is rose gold and I have a couple of plushies that have pink accents.

Are there any foods that often give you heartburn or indigestion? >> Not reliably, I don’t think.

What are the initials of the last person you saw naked? How did you meet that person? >> SAD. On tumblr.

What was the last thing someone said to you, that sounded like an innuendo? >> I don’t remember.

Is there something you intend to buy in the near future? >> Some washcloths and a towel, for sure. Haven’t planned to buy anything else at this time.

What was the last thing that caused you to scowl, or frown? >> I don’t remember.

Is anyone in your family artistically talented? What about musically? >> ---

Have you smiled at any point during the last hour? What was your reason for doing so? >> Well, yeah. I mean, just random things? I can’t think of a specific exact reason.

Can you name 3 foods you like, that are yellow? >> Cornbread, corn tortilla, mango...? Mango is more orangey, I think, but fuck it, this question is hard enough as it is.

What was the last thing you consulted Google for? >> I don’t remember.

Look around the room - can you see anything that has stripes on it? >> Not from my point of view.

When was the last time you read a non-fiction book? What was it about? >> The last time I read from Heather Havrilesky’s How to Be a Person In the World. It’s a collection of answers to letters she’s gotten sent on her advice column, Ask Polly. After a while the problems in the letters she’s chosen start to get repetitive, so I’ve put it on the back burner while I get into Borne.

So, did anyone send you a “Happy New Year” message when midnight hit? >> Nope.

Is your television on right now? What are you watching? >> Nope.

Can you recall the last time you sighed? What was the reason? >> I don’t remember. Maybe it was a sigh of contentment after I finished my dinner.

What cute behaviours or characteristics does/do your pet(s) have? >> ---

Have you rolled your eyes at anyone/anything lately? >> I don’t think so.

What’s the screensaver on your computer? >> I don’t use a screensaver. The screen just shuts off after a few minutes.

[eldritchsurveys]

1127.

1.) Have you ever experienced caffeine withdrawals? What do they feel like for you? >> No.

2.) How do you drive in congested traffic? If you don’t drive, what do you do when confronted with a long line, such as at a checkout? >> What do you mean? I wait, or I leave if I’m in a hurry or too overstimulated or whatever to handle it. What else am I to do?

3.) How do you feel about IQs? >> I think the whole concept is ridiculously flawed and outdated.

4.) Do you walk in the dark with your keys between your knuckles? Do you preemptively prepare to defend yourself in any way in similar settings? >> I rarely have any reason to be out when it’s dark, and if I am I’m probably with someone else, so this isn’t an issue for me. Sparrow has one of those things you put on your keychain that’s shaped like a cat, and you put your fingers through the eyeholes and the cat ears stick out between your knuckles so you can jab someone with them if you’re accosted. I don’t actually know how effective that would be in a situation, but it sure is cute.

5.) If you were to dress your pet(s) up for Halloween, even if you don’t actually have pets, what do you think you’d dress them up as? >> ---

6.) When strangers converse with you out of the blue, how do you react? >> Nervously, usually, but cordially. Sometimes people catch me in a foul mood and then I’m more curt, but most of the time I just try to be kind even in my nervousness.

7.) Have you been struck speechless recently? >> Maybe, but I don’t remember.

8.) What happened the last time you were locked out of your house/car/room/etc.? >> That hasn’t happened since I moved here, which was almost five years ago, so I don’t remember.

9.) Has anything recently happened to you/have you recently done anything that made you think, “Wow, I’m really getting old(er)”? >> I don’t know, maybe. That’s not really something I think about, like... obviously I know what age I am, but it doesn’t preoccupy me. I imagine it will when I actually begin showing signs of ageing, but right now it’s not really relevant.

10.) Does the weather change drastically throughout the day where you live? How do you prepare for it? >> Not to me. Maybe to someone who lives in a different climate?

11.) Does the concept of homemade or “indie brand” cosmetics appeal to you? Why/why not? >> I don’t care.

12.) What’s a sincerely nice thing someone recently said to you? >> ---

13.) Is there anything you get for free as a benefit for being a member of something? >> Not that I can think of.

14.) Has anything about fashion recently frustrated you? >> No.

15.) Any weird coincidences happen lately? >> I don’t think so.

16.) Have you found learning new skills or languages has gotten harder as you’ve gotten older? Any examples? >> Sure, I mean... in general, I have a harder time taking up new things because the time and energy investment is just way more daunting to me. As opposed to when I was a child and that sort of thing never even occurred to me -- I just did stuff I wanted to do.

17.) You’re on a university’s campus and see a few extremely elderly people walking around. Why do you think they’re there? >> I mean, there are... so many possible reasons...

18.) Can you watch movies/YouTube videos/television in public? (Socially, I mean. I’m asking because I’m currently too embarrassed to watch anime in an area with lots of people around heheheheh.) >> Yeah.

19.) What about falling asleep in public? Can you do that? >> I mean, I used to have to... but I don’t know if I could do it now that I’ve acclimated to being housed and in my own room at that. It’d be way harder to readjust.

20.) What do you do in terms of saving money for the long-term? >> Nothing. I don’t make enough money to do that.

21.) Speaking of money, will you have to cut back on spending this week or do you have some leeway? >> I don’t know how to answer this, lol. I have the same amount of money every month, I know what I can and can’t do with it.

22.) How’s your appetite been lately? >> Unremarkable, I guess. Nothing about it’s changed, or anything. 23.) Is the area you live in segregated by any factors? >> This city has some weird dividing lines, mostly based on economic factors (although class and race have always been intertwined, so, you know how it goes). The class divide looks pretty dramatic here, as in you can drive down one street and watch it change from upscale bougie boutiques and restaurants to dilapidated abandoned buildings and homeless camps over like, a mile or two.

24.) Are there any questions at all you’d like to ask a lawyer? >> Nope.

25.) Are some human lives worth more than others? >> I prefer not to make judgements of that nature, and err on the side of “the less lives given for the sake of other lives, the better for everyone”.

[eldritchsurveys]

1126.

1 - When was the last time you went somewhere for the first time? Where did you go and did you have a good time? >> The other day, to a couple of hair stores I’d never been inside. I found what I was looking for, so it was satisfying at least.

2 - What was the last thing you spent money on? >> A video game that I ended up not liking, so I returned it for a refund. I haven’t gotten the refund back yet, so I still count it as money spent until I do.

3 - What’s your favourite flavour of potato chip? >> Kettle brand salt and pepper.

4 - Do you wear a watch? >> Nope.

5 - When was the last time you mailed a letter? Who did you send it to? >> I sent cookie tins to two friends that had cards inside, so that’s kind of like a letter, I think.

6 - Do you like receiving postcards from different places around the world? >> I’ve never had this experience, but I assume I wouldn’t hate it or anything.

7 - Do you often wake up in the middle of the night and struggle to get back to sleep? What did you do the last time that happened? >> I do often wake up in the middle of the night, but whether I struggle to get back to sleep or not is a coin toss. I was awakened repeatedly by plows and such last night because of the snowfall.

8 - Who was the last person to truly get on your nerves? What do you think caused you to feel that way? >> I don’t remember.

9 - Do you recycle? Is this through choice or do you live somewhere where it’s compulsory? >> No.

10 - Do you prefer plain, carbonated or flavoured water? Do you think you drink enough water throughout the day? >> I like fizzy flavoured water (only San Pellegrino, though) and plain water. I think between the two I probably have a decent water intake.

11 - Is there anything that all your ex partners have in common? Does your current partner have that thing in common too? >> I don’t think so.

12 - Have you ever needed to call the police, ambulance or fire department? >> Yes.

13 - When was the last time you visited the library? What was the purpose of your visit? >> That’s a good question. Certainly at no point this year, so I have no idea.

14 - How often do you wear a hat? What style was it? >> Pretty often in the wintertime, never in the summer. It’s just a floppy beanie style hat.

15 - Have you ever been hunting, or is that not something you agree with? What about if people eat what they kill? >> I’ve never been hunting because I’ve never had the opportunity. I don’t agree with sport hunting but I take no issue with the other kind.

16 - How many times a week do you do laundry? Do you need to do any right now? >> Once weekly, on the weekend.

17 - When was the last time you had a headache? Did you do anything to get rid of it? >> I don’t remember. I probably took an Aleve or two.

18 - Do you see a lot of wild animals where you live? Are any of them dangerous? >> Aside from squirrels and your occasional raccoon, skunk, turkey, deer, or woodchuck, no. Nothing especially dangerous (well, I’d argue for the skunk -- that stink is pretty lethal to my nose, lol).

19 - Aside from when you were born, have you ever had to stay the night in the hospital? >> Yes.

20 - Do you often fall asleep somewhere that isn’t your bed? >> No.

21 - Have you ever experienced a panic attack? >> Yes.

22 - Would you ever want to go into the medical profession? Was your answer different pre-COVID? >> Probably not. As fascinating as medical stuff is, a high-stress, high-stakes, noisy, messy, overstimulating job is the actual opposite of what I’d require.

23 - Where you live, are people paying attention to whatever restrictions are in place to help control COVID? >> Some people are, some people aren’t. I’m not keeping track.

24 - Do you get a real or artificial Christmas tree? >> We have an artificial one.

25 - What’s your favourite type/flavour of popcorn? >> I don’t eat popcorn.

[eldritchsurveys]

1125.

Are you an emotional wreck? >> Not right now. I can be, though. Will tomorrow be better than today? >> I don’t know, maybe? It’s most likely to be pretty much exactly like today (just without the cleaning, and I’ll probably take a walk especially if there’s still snow on the ground). Do you still talk to the person you were dating 4 months ago? >> --- Are you nice to everyone? >> I don’t behave unpleasantly towards most people, not intentionally. But as I understand it, I don’t exactly exude warmth, either. So, YMMV. Who did you last hang out with? >> Sparrow, because we live together.

Was the first person you talked to today male or female? >> Female.

What’s the one thing that always gets you through the day? >> Hmm. Does it make you uncomfortable when you receive a compliment? >> Sometimes, depending on the compliment and my current feelings towards myself. But oftentimes I’m just happy to be appreciated by someone. Is there a night you would like to put on repeat and live it forever? >> No. Did you do laundry today? >> No. What kind of computer do you have? >> The one I’m currently using is a Lenovo. My other one was built by NZXT. What size bed do you have? >> Twin. I’ve grown fond of the size now, it’s small but so am I and it really hasn’t caused me any problems, so I think I’ll keep it even if we move and I get a bigger room. Also, you get the cheapest sheet price with a twin bed. Do you like Harold & Kumar? >> I’ve never watched those movies. Can you say all 50 states in alphabetical order? >> I mean, eventually. Do you subscribe to any magazines? >> No, but I was gifted a New York Times subscription recently, so I have that. Do you ever buy the same shirt in different colors? >> I don’t usually wear different colours, haha. Do you plan your outfits out the day before? >> No. Last time you rode a bicycle? >> It’s been a long time. I’m afraid to ride it again because it’s just been sitting in the garage through temperature changes and humidity and stuff, and I don’t know how to maintain it or anything. :S What do you have planned for today? >> Today is over. We cleaned the apartment and called maintenance about the dishwasher (hopefully they’ll come tomorrow...).

What did you argue about last? >> ---

What is the last thing you bought? >> A video game, but I ended up returning it for a refund after playing it for a half hour because I didn’t like it. So glad for the refund policy.

Can you touch your toes? >> I mean, yeah, but I’d have to bend my knees. What’s your star sign? >> Gemini Sun. Last place you went out to dinner at? >> Some restaurant in some other town, I don’t remember the name of either. Ever made out on a rooftop? >> I don’t know. I’ve been on rooftops plenty of times but I don’t remember if I’ve made out on any. Well-- when I was dating Andre, one place he lived in had rooftop access and I definitely was up there with him at least once, so maybe the answer’s yes. Where in the world is Carmen San Diego? >> Depends on the episode. What kind of phone do you have? >> Moto g6 Play. Are your nails painted? >> No. Would you date anyone you met online? >> I have. Have you met a real redneck? >> I mean, probably. How is the weather right now? >> Snowy and cold. What was the last movie you watched? >> If Beale Street Could Talk.

Where was the last place you went besides your house? >> A couple of hair stores, a fragrance shop, and a grocery store. Have you ever fired a gun? >> No. Last wedding you attended? >> Elle’s, in January. What does the newest text in your inbox say? >> I think the last text was sent by me, and it was a link to a tiktok. What are you listening to? >> Nothing. Have you ever made your parents cry? >> --- Do you wear glasses? >> No. Have you ever thrown up on one of your friends? >> No. Are you tan? >> I’m dark-skinned. What are you wearing right now? >> Sweatpants, undershirt, hoodie. Do you know anyone that wants you dead? >> I’m not aware of it, if this is so. Do you believe that regrets are lessons learned? >> *shrug* Are you the one that normally makes the first move? >> --- Would you sacrifice yourself for a friend? >> I don’t see how I’d ever end up in a situation like this. What’s really annoying you right now? >> Nothing. Do you currently work? >> No. Who do you know you can depend on? >> *shrug* When’s your birthday? >> May 28. Who was the last person you texted? >> Sparrow. What are you gonna do later? >> Sleep, it’s 10p. Do you like where you live? >> Not especially. Are you a jealous person? >> No. If the last person you kissed invited you to a family dinner, would you go? >> --- Has anyone ever told one of your secrets they promised they wouldn’t tell? >> I don’t know if I’ve ever told anyone anything and called it a secret. Maybe when I was in school? But I wouldn’t remember anything about that now. Have you ever lent the last person you called money? >> --- Did you have any unread texts when you woke up today? >> No. Can you sleep easier with the TV on then off? >> I sleep better in silence. Have you ever kissed the last person you texted? >> Yes. Is the last person you kissed black? >> I think the last was King Crimson, and he’s... outside of earthly racial experience.

[eldritchsurveys]

1124.

Do you drink oat milk? >> This is a “how Gen Z are you?” survey, and I am not Gen Z, so this should be fun! :p I’ve had it in cafe drinks, but I’ve never had it by itself. It seems to be on the... idk, chalky side.

Has oat milk changed your life? >> Nah, I’m not into it. Macadamia milk is the tits, though.

Before oat milk, were you more of an almond milk person? >> I do like almond milk as well.

Are you interested in nut milks in general? >> Yeah! I think the whole genre is cool. It’s good to have alternatives. Of course, after saying this, I’m going to read something horrible about the nut milk industry tomorrow in the NYT or something.

Do you love Trader Joe’s? >> I do love Trader Joe’s. I go kind of apeshit in there every time we go. Also, our local TJs has a little stuffed panther named Joesy that they hide in different parts of the store and it’s fun to hunt him down. Little things, god dammit.

Do you love Trader Joe’s seasonal candles even more? >> I don’t like scented candles.

Is the pumpkin/vanilla one your jam? >> ---

Did you have a matcha phase? >> A phase, no. I just like matcha, period.

Do you love thrifting? >> I wouldn’t say that. I don’t like shopping at all, and thrift shops tend to be more disorganised and chaotic than other kinds of stores, which makes it even more stressful for me. But I appreciate being able to buy things that were pre-owned instead of contributing to the buy-new-discard-buy-new-again mill that capitalism prefers us to be on.

Do you wish you were thrifting right now? >> No???

Is what you’re currently wearing “thrifted.” >> Nope.

Do you use the word “aesthetic” as a noun? >> Yeah, like “for the aesthetic” or “that’s his aesthetic”. (Is that recently-coined usage? Didn’t realise that, I thought it was always a noun.)

Do you buy things because “aesthetic.” >> I mean, I do buy things because they match a certain vibe that I like to have around me, or because they match something else I have... 

Do you consider using only lowercase letters your aesthetic? >> No, it’s just the way I type (when not taking surveys). It doesn’t seem important for my purposes.

Did you have a vegan phase? >> I was raised vegan...

What about gluten free? >> No, I don’t have a gluten intolerance so there was no reason for me to eat gluten-free.

Do you like fast casual vegan restaurants like By Chloe? >> I’ve never heard of that, and I’m not sure I’ve ever been to a fast-casual vegan restaurant at all.

Do you say “this is sending me.” >> Yes.

Do you say “love that for me.” >> No.

Do you say “mood.” >> All the time.

Do you own fairy lights? >> Yep, I’ve got a string of them over my bed. I keep forgetting to replace the battery, though.

Do you have a disposable camera? >> Nope. Have those made a comeback?!

Do you have a polaroid picture wall of some kind? >> No.

Do you own a tea kettle? >> Well, yes...

Do you drink tea before bed? >> Sometimes. We have several varieties of Sleepytime (I really like the peach one), for example. It’s just nice to have a cup of tea while lounging in bed reading or browsing tumblr before settling in for sleep.

Do you own glass straws because the metal ones kind of gross you out because you can’t tell if they are clean or not? >> I’ve never seen a glass straw, didn’t even know that was a thing. I just... don’t use straws, tbh. I don’t care for them.

Have you made a TikTok? >> I have an account so I can use the app and save favourites and send tiktoks to Sparrow, but I don’t post on it.

Do you know what your “FYP” on TikTok is? >> Yeah, the neverending feed you’re greeted with when you open the app.

Are you currently rewatching “Gossip Girl”? >> I’ve never seen that.

Do you have anxiety? >> I don’t have an anxiety disorder.

Do you identify as an ambivert? >> No.

Do you have a YouTube channel? >> No, just an account for interacting with other people’s videos.

Is there actually a video on it? >> ---

Do you own airpods? >> No.

Can you not live without them? >> ---

Have you cried today? >> Not today, no.

Do you feel guilty about buying stuff on Amazon but use it anyway? >> Nah, I just don’t use Amazon. I don’t really have to, after all, I have other options. If I did have to for some reason, though (and there are definitely reasons why people might have to depend on Amazon -- they’ve literally set themselves up that way, it’s a fucking trap and that’s part of what’s so galling about the whole thing), I sure as hell wouldn’t let anyone try to guilt-trip me about it.

Do you feel guilty for shopping at Brandy Melville because it’s problematic? >> I don’t know what or who that is.

Have you ever eaten at a Sweetgreen? >> Never heard of it.

Could you eat Sweetgreen everyday? >> ---

Do you NOT have a Facebook? >> I didn’t have one for a while but I eventually made one so people could contact me through it if they had to. I don’t post on it and I really hate even having the account, but that’s the constant dilemma when something is so insidiously ubiqitous. Do I participate in this thing and deal with the cognitive dissonance so I don’t miss out on connections, or do I opt out and deal with those consequences? There is no right answer, there’s only the one that you can live with.

Do you call school “Zoom University”? >> ---

Do you get “Sunday Scaries”? >> ???

Are you afraid of Mercury in retrograde? >> Of course not. It’s not supposed to be frightening in the first place, but the memery around it has both simplified and exaggerated how it works.

Do you make life choices based on astrology? >> I don’t really make life choices, period, lol. What choices do I have to make? What to eat for dinner? My life is really simplified.

Do you have less than 10 photos on your Instagram grid? >> I don’t have an Instagram.

Do you Facetime more than you actually call your friends? >> ---

Do you know what Cottagecore is? Are you into it? >> I have a workable understanding of what it is, but I wouldn’t say I’m into it. I like the idea of living in a more naturally “connected” and less hectic environment, of course, but I don’t have a blog about it or anything.

Is your go to pose in pictures a sideways peace sign? >> I don’t have a go-to pose because I’m rarely in photos at all. But I have done the sideways peace sign before, it’s fun.

Do you say “we love” when referring to something only you love? >> No. If I say “We” it’s because I’m including the Inworlders.

And lastly, are you always tired? >> Nah. I bet I sure the fuck would be if I had to do half the shit my peers have to do (particularly in the realm of employment).

[eldritchsurveys]

1123.

How many books did you read this year? >> 38!

Did you reread anything? What? >> A Mountain Walked (a cosmic horror anthology edited by S.T. Joshi) Wolves of the Calla and Wizard & Glass by Stephen King The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster The Giver by Lois Lowry Lost Souls by Poppy Z Brite

What were your top five books of the year? >> Oof. I’ll go with… Heavy by Kiese Laymon Recursion by Blake Crouch The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver Deathless by Catherynne Valente Making Friends With Death by Laura Pritchett The Phantom Tollbooth gets an honourable mention just because it’s one of my fave books period, and I would love to include Braiding Sweetgrass here because it’s so good so far but I haven’t finished it yet so I guess I’ll have to save it for next year’s list.

Did you discover any new authors that you love this year? >> Yeah, Dr Robin Wall Kimmerer and Blake Crouch.

What genre did you read the most of? >> Nonfiction.

Was there anything you meant to read, but never got to? >> Oh, my backlog is always way too long for my own good.

What was your average Goodreads rating? Does it seem accurate? >> I don’t use goodreads anymore.

Did you meet any of your reading goals? Which ones? >> I set it to 50 at the beginning of this year, but by mid-year I was like “I don’t care about this sort of thing anymore” so I stopped tracking it. I realised that sort of thing is counter to how I like to read and think about my reading.

Did you get into any new genres? >> No.

What was your favorite new release of the year? >> I’m not even sure what-all was released this year. Nothing that I read, I assume.

What was your favorite book that has been out for a while, but you just now read? >> That’s just all of the books on my top five, lol.

Any books that disappointed you? >> The latter half of The King In Yellow, Brave New World (it was okay, I just wasn’t super into it), the first half of A Mountain Walked (all the stories I remembered liking were actually in the second half of the book for some reason).

What were your least favorite books of the year? >> Whatever I didn’t finish, most likely.

What books do you want to finish before the year is over? >> I don’t care when I finish a book.

Did you read any books that were nominated for or won awards this year (Booker, Women’s Prize, National Book Award, Pulitzer, Hugo, etc.)? What did you think of them? >> I mean, maybe. I really don’t pay attention to that sort of thing.

What is the most over-hyped book you read this year? >> Brave New World. Maybe the Hunger Games series and Deathless too.

Did any books surprise you with how good they were? >> Maybe. I don’t know if “surprise” is the word?

How many books did you buy? >> I bought a couple on Google Play Books (the two Heather Havrilesky books), and Braiding Sweetgrass in the local bookstore. I was also gifted three books for Christmas! And of course, I had my Scribd subscription.

Did you use your library? >> Not this year. The ebook selection is too meager for me. 

What was your most anticipated release? Did it meet your expectations? >> —

Did you participate in or watch any booklr, booktube, or book twitter drama? >> Nope.

What’s the longest book you read? >> Fucking Wolves of the Calla.

What’s the fastest time it took you to read a book? >> An hour or two (The Phantom Tollbooth).

Did you DNF anything? Why? >> Yeah, but like I said, I don’t remember what they were.

What reading goals do you have for next year? >> I’m not doing the goals thing anymore. I just want to keep reading at my own pace, enjoying myself, not putting arbitrary stress on myself to “meet a goal”. It’s not a competition, not even with myself.