#not even necessarily shipping theres just SUCH a lack of one on one content of any sort of so many duos

[faerlocksholmes]

i do like ranpoe but i also like souheki and kuniran and chuuran and fyoran and mushiran and nikoran and ransuji an

[tiredelirium]

D.14

This is the near halfway mark where this task of self journalling begins to feel like a chore. A selfmade target with a pointless trajectory. Still honestly surprised I’ve been able to keep this up so long.

A part of me knows nobody will ever read any of these entries. They’ll never be picked up by an algorithm thanks to my limited tags, or reblogged for any particular reason as theres no real meat behind each entry.

These words are, as I’ve tagged them, scattered thoughts written out loud, alongside a handful of meagre stories of my past. Maybe I’ll write something about my present sometime in one of these entries, but it’s an unlikely thing. My present isn’t very thought provoking, interesting, or available in any way.

Pretty soon I’ll be a third of my way through a life that I haven’t accomplished much in. There are things I want to do, of course, but a lack of drive and motivation to get to action has always been my biggest character flaw. I’ve mentioned before about this. They say disinterest is a big part of depression. But I don’t think it would be possible for me to have been depressed since I was 12. Maybe that is a possibility, and it was just something that came with puberty alongside anxiety and isolationist habits.

I want to write a book. I’ve made several attempts to start ones in the past, both fantastical and modern. Though I can never get past the first few pages. It always hits me after that point. The disinterest. The apathy. The lack of drive or motivation.

If we were ever taught as children how to motivate ourselves in life I must have missed that lesson.

I want to travel the world. I’ve been to places in the past, but very rarely of my own volition and choice. Family holidays to sunny climates, and school trips are truly the only ones. I’ve been to the far east of Europe, borderline Russia. I’ve been to New York. I’ve been to the Mediterranean, to little islands in the middle of seas. And i’ve travelled across a tiny fraction of the UK, namely England and Wales.

At one point I seriously considered, and briefly looked into, joining a crew and attempting a ship faring life. I was talked down from the idea by my parents. One whose father was a sailor and an arsehole, the other who didn’t want to lose contact with me for months on end with no idea if I would be safe or not. The second wasn’t overprotection, but just genuine concern. The seas are unforgiving after all, and I’d be a rookie before I was ever good enough.

I want to make a game. Not necessarily a video game though that would be a fun project and there’s lots of engines and facilities out there these days to try and make one. I’ve made a ton of homebrew dnd content for my own enjoyment, from specialised subclasses and unique items, to monsters and large scale settings. Currently, in my spare time, I’m working on a Horror based TTRPG setup. A kind of one and done game, that, unlike DND, wouldn’t be a module that could run for 50+ sessions.

It’s a fun project so far, but the disinterest will hit me eventually. Maybe I’ll get distracted with another project idea. Maybe I’ll simply hit a wall of non-creativeness, where ideas just don’t hit as good. Or maybe I’ll get frustrated and think the project is dumb and pointless.

I wish my mind wasn’t this way, but it’s not an easy thing to change a method of thinking. Especially when you don’t know where that thinking originated or why it still persists, even against the things you enjoy.

I’m greedy.

[your-local-uwu-artist]

You ever just get the urge to write an essay about errorink??? 

Every now and then I remember that people not into the ship think its just an “enemies to lovers” thing and its like OH BOY ITS SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT 

miniture ship ramble of one reason i love error x ink under the cut

For me Ive always found it a comfort ship because I just find their to be something poetic about the idea of how two people both under the impression that they could never be capable of love managing to somehow find a way to make it work: In a way I find the way people that dislike the ship talk about how “it could never work” to be ironic, cause to me thats like the whole point

like error as he exits his joker peak insanity phase and starts to realize how much hes isolated himself (insert the error clean freak amv) and ink as he slowly learns and tries to understand all the feelings hes been allowed to feel, and its just like, the idea that these indivuals that view themselves as very seperate to the rest of the world, putting themselves on a pedestal of cockyness and having put up walls without themselves realizing, both of them are under the impression that love is a feeling they are incapable of, that there are incapable of true meanigful connection with others, and that even if they were it wouldnt be enough, that ink deserves better than someone who cant express his feelings, and error deserves someone with a soul to share

and that these to indivuals who struggle to communicate are able to form their own social signals and laungauge between themselves and learn to understand each other and learn that relationships are worth the time to learn to understand someone, 

I like stories where error slowly overcomes some haphephobia for ink but I also love stories where ink and error make it work despite that, where ink despite being a very touchy person and not being top tier at expressing feelings for others manages to find other ways to express care for error, and the two are able to be content in their relationship despite it

This is why “love like you” is an errorink anthem to me, error sees how ink is so passionate about everything despite a lack of soul and how he manages to appreciate the muktiverse despite understanding the nilihsim and lack if meaning to it all, its how their both considered godly beings when both of them started out as just, remains of broken worlds, neither of them fully understand how they’ve come to admire and care for the other they just do

I also think theres some neat parallels to make with their “destoryer” and “creator” titles and backrounds, both were trumatized by staying in a blank infinite white space for too long, for error this cause him to be a minimilist claustrophobe and for ink this caused him to find comfort of clutter and fear wide blank spaces, error directly destroys worlds in universe, ink indirectly helps to create worlds both in but also out of universe, while the destroyer error than procedes to delicately hand make dolls and knit and crochet, while the creator ink has quite the talent for destorying his own relationships!

okay on the topic of ink’s relationships I find errorink even better with some past tense drink, (where ink and dream evvuentually reformed their friendship) 

personally I prefer narrative where there were never like, legit enemies, like on inks side it was just the opposing ideals but ink was otherwise always down to annoy chat with him :) and on errors side error hated him before he got to know him, and over time in tsundere fashion annoying traits became endearing ones, and I’d imagine more so than anything what could cause errors feelings to grow is that Ink still stuck around even though error’s not kind to him

It also doesn't necessarily have to be romantic, its top tier as an unlabeled queer platonic type thing as well, I prefer it romantic cause I think they have excellant romantic chemistry but its still perfection as just platonic

[tigercomplex]

anyways. so. wfc siege was uh, something?

not nearly as bad as i thought it might be but theres certainly.... problems.

The animations not so bad imo, better than prime wars at least. Colors could use some saturation, and most of the setting is too... samey. Like, you’ve got grey, more grey, grey ruins, grey.... The only really distinct locations would be like, the arc, that arena megatron gave speeches in, and the sea of rust (but MAN did they go hard with that one, wish it had more screentime). Should’ve taken a cue from fall of cybertron for the rest of the settings. Uh, and the music was nice whenever I noticed it. Nothing really iconic that sticks into my mind but at the beginning I liked the combinations of strings/synths or whatever the hell they used. It could be worked on to be actually memorable though.

The voice acting is like. super hit or miss. Most of it was like, trying too hard to be dramatic and all “war is hell”. Plus I’m still miffed about hasbro clearly not wanting to pay cullen and welker, and apparently not wanting to work with union VAs. The decepticons also like, all have this same/similar quality even on characters I don’t think it necessarily fits? Like they’re all “yes, I am eeevilll” and then that voice comes out of frickin impactor, who I’ve always seen as more gruff. Also impactor should have gotten an f-bomb. Soundwave’s voice is off, and feels like he doesn’t have very much.... presence, compared to everyone else. Shockwave’s voice isn’t bad by itself but I think the VA would be better suited by a less G1 design.

Elita-1, arcee, chromia, and moonracer’s designs kind of suck. They all have incredibly similar silhouettes (to the point several of the subtitles incorrectly identified one as another) and stick out like a sore thumb against the dudes. They’re significantly more frail, and have alot of round shapes and lack of kibble, and it’s clearly because they’re girls. G1 accuracy is worthless if it it’s done like this. They have these like, weird necks too? The guys are more like, segmented from their heads, because fleshy looking necks has always been weird in transformers. Also, rip moonracer you had no character whatsoever but we’re still expected to be sad about you I guess.

Speaking of character, I feel like transformers media is particularly prone to relying on past material to do the characterization work instead of actually writing it in. We all expect a character to act a certain way, so the writers take advantage of that to fill in the gaps they’ve left. Most of the characters weren’t really compelling to me, and then the like, exact second I start giving a shit about impactor, he gets shot like once and dies. Death is largely inconsistent in this franchise. Dude has a skyscraper land on him and gets saved, but can’t take a bullet mr. president style without getting shafted. And not to mention like, whats-his-face. Cog. got half his torso blown out and he was back up in no time. It’s all about what’s convenient for the writers. Back to talking about characterization. 2~ hours of content isn’t enough time to flesh out the cast at all. You’d have to drastically reduce the amount of characters, and just aim for a movie instead of a six episode series. Like, we clearly saw what a lack of time did for cyberverse, hasbro seriously needs to learn that these kinds of constraints are always going to negatively impact the show.

Also, like, am I the only one who’s getting kind of tired of this whole megatron and revolution thing? Like, it keeps being done kind of. crappily. And nobody really wants to do anything different in a substantial way. Siege being absolutely no exception because it’s always talked about by the characters in extremely vague terms, like going back and forth constantly like “no YOU started the war” and  “no YOU broke the planet” and it’s so boring. Give me an actual series of events. Show me what happened, show me why characters did these things, show me a halfway new take on it.

Oh, and like... this weird ass forced oplita is weird. I’m not opposed to the pairing in concept but, like I’ve said, there’s not much room to make decent characterizations and arcs and develop relationships. Plus it’s like... they really go hard on the no homo bro thing with mags and megs. Like. They Knew. But after all that I’m betting money impactor/ratchet is going to be like, THE ship for this whole series, maybe with some impactor/mirage on the side. Anticipate that, hasbro.

In the end hasbro probably isn’t going to change much, because we’re all still going to watch it, and we’re all still going to buy the toys. Well, I mean, maybe not all the toys. Earthrise arcee sucks so bad.