#not completely of course i remember one straight guy getting hate crimed for wearing “Girl Pants” and things of that nature

[drdemonprince]

Looking at people responding to that video of a high school circa 2002 and realizing that a lot of my demeanor and general outlook has been informed by the fact that id found a solid niche that kept people from fucking with me by the time that i was in early high school. already by then i had slid comfortably into the identity of "smart snarky person who keeps to himself but will deliver a withering take-down the moment you ask him his opinion on anything" that both classmates and teachers found enjoyable to be around. i cant really say it was masking. it was more like an optimized build capitalizing on the attributes that were already there. but also, my high school was just not a place where all that much bullying happened? it was middle school were i saw and personally experienced a whole hell of a lot more of that. to the degree that i thought movies and tv shows depicting bullying as a high school thing was like, fake

[tomboyneedshercoffee]

Lovedust Pt.3 || Peter Parker x Stark Reader

Summary: Y/N catches the eye of one of her male classmates who invites her to an upcoming party. As she weighs her options, Peter takes her out for a treat but old history comes back up. 

Word Count: 4.1k

Author’s Note: I hope everyone is safe during this crazy time. Remember: Wear a mask, wash your hands, and only leave your house for necessities! You can literally stay at home and read fanfiction all day and you would be saving lives! I introduced a new male character and I’ll be real, Joshua Bassett needs to be appreciated so I put him in! However, for the character Josh you can think of any celeb or crush you have if you want! 

Warnings: Adult language, mentions of sex

part one || part two || part three || part four || part five || part six || 

part seven || part eight || epilogue

When Monday rolled around, all you wanted to do was stay home. You felt that there was too much going on to just go on autopilot for eight hours at school when all you could think about was how to fix Peter.

While you had decided that you would at least be nice to him, there was still a small part of you that was worried about what would happen if he never got better. 

How much of your relationship would change and worst of all, what would happen to his ‘superhero’ duties?

If you were really the only thing running through his mind, how would he even function saving lives?

As much as you wanted to sit and worry about him, you knew you needed to get your own life together before you started fixing other people like going to school.

You went to college-prep academy which really just meant that everyone had to wear uniforms to kill all individualistic forms of expression and pay ridiculous tuition to learn. 

You really didn’t mind since most of your classes were ridiculously easy but a lot of your classmates were spoiled monsters who liked to flaunt their rich last name.

Lucky for you, Stark was pretty hard to beat.

Once you slipped your blazer on, you grabbed the straps of your backpack and walked out into the kitchen to pack your lunch where Peter was already awake, making breakfast.

Usually, by this time, Peter would already be on his way to school on the subway but your dad and Banner thought it would be best for him to stay at the complex so they could run more tests on him.

Peter took his attention off of the stove and drew his eyes towards you, his face already flushed red as he tried not to stare below your skirt,” Y/N! You look really pretty in your uh- uniform.”

At this point, you knew that whatever words that came out of Peter’s mouth wasn’t his fault so you decided to roll with it. You were so used to him always giving you snarky replies about your school uniform but now, you didn’t have to waste your energy thinking of a comeback.

You hummed as you leaned over the kitchen island to grab a piece of bacon that was off to the side,” And you look really pretty in your pajamas Parker. How are you holding up? Are they getting any closer into figuring out how to stop your chest pains?”

Ever since Peter first made contact with the lovedust, he had been complaining about how tight his chest was feeling. It seemed like a normal side effect since it would happen whenever you were close to him but as days passed, his chest started to hurt more every time you weren’t around.

You felt guilty knowing that you going to school would literally cause him pain but at the same time, you couldn’t adjust your whole life around Peter.

Peter shook his head as he swallowed hard,” No not yet but I’m sure they’ll figure out something soon... I packed your lunch by the way. It’s over there by the sink.”

You looked over towards the sink and sure enough, your lunch bag that you hadn’t used since freshman year was neatly packed. You didn’t have the heart to tell him that your school had really good chicken pesto on Mondays so you gladly looked through the lunch bag to see what was inside.

As you looked through it, you could see a white piece of lined paper folded and taped against a small packet of Oreos. Peter noticed that you had found the note and this time, his face grew redder.

“ You can throw it away if you want, I thought it would be nice or whatever,” Peter said quietly as he walked over to where you were standing.

He reached for your lunch bag but you tensed up, pulling it towards your chest,” Aw, come on Parker, please? Technically, this note is like mail and you know it’s a federal crime to tamper with it.”

Peter bit the inside of his cheek and nodded as he rubbed his sweaty palms on his thighs. You had never seen Peter ever this flustered before and a part of you felt guilty that you were the reason he was so nervous but a part of you liked the attention.

You had to remind yourself that once Peter was cured, it gave him free rein to possibly be the same dick as before. At least for now, you liked being friends with Peter.

“ I gotta go now but I’ll see you after school,” You finally said as you put your backpack on and walked over to the elevator,” try not to die or anything.”

“ I’ll do my best, have a good day,” Peter smiled as he suddenly remembered something,” oh, make sure you bring an umbrella, it’s supposed to rain today.”

You checked your phone to look at the weather for the afternoon but saw that it was supposed to be bright and sunny all day,” I’m sure it’ll be fine, bye Parker.”

Once you made it all the way downstairs to the main entrance, you looked behind your shoulder to make sure no one was behind you before rummaging through your lunch bag. You took out the note Peter had written to you and even though you didn’t even open it yet, you already felt your stomach twisting and turning.

You had a feeling it would be him saying how pretty you looked or how much he loved you since he was under his lovey trance but when you opened up the note, you felt yourself smile.

Thank you for not being weird about everything that’s going on. I’ll make it up to you, I promise. P.S I love it when you call me Parker

                                                      -------

School dragged on and on and by the time the last bell had rung, you felt like you were on the verge of dropping out.

Any of your STEM classes weren’t as interesting or as challenging to you anymore, especially since you had a whole floor in your own house that was just laboratories filled with people who have actually won Nobel Prizes.  

Once you left class, you made your way straight to your locker and put your math textbook into your backpack. When you shut your locker, you looked up to see your friend Kim holding up her phone towards your face.

“ Hello to you too, what am I looking at?” You asked as you took her phone to get a better look at the screen,” is this a Snapchat invitation?”

“ Good, you can read,” Kim teased as she adjusted the straps of her backpack,” Amber is throwing a party on Saturday and we have to go!”

You furrowed your eyebrows as you handed the phone back to her. You didn’t hate parties but you much rather preferred smaller functions with all of your friends than a room filled with total strangers your age.

“ I thought we hated Amber and I’m pretty sure she hates us. She literally called you rat face when you were doing your presentation and you pushed her into the trashcan the other day,” You reminded Kim as your mind thought back to how much you disliked Amber.

If your school was the chocolate factory, Amber Kennedy was Veruca Salt. Anytime she pouted and whined about whatever new golden ticket she craved, she got it.

While Amber never anything specific towards you, anyone who disrespected your friend was an enemy in your book.

Kim rolled her eyes as the two of you made your way down the hallway,” Okay that’s true, I hate that bitch with every fiber of my being but I just need a mental break from school. Plus, it’ll be good for you to get yourself out there. I heard a certain lead singer in a band is looking forward to seeing you there.”

You knew right away who Kim was going on about but you only shrugged,” I don’t know who you’re talking about...Is it raining outside?”

Of course, she knew you were lying because there was only one guy you ever mentioned around her when you weren’t complaining about Peter.

Joshua- or Josh- was one of the few guys in your life who managed to not piss you off completely but that wasn’t the only thing you liked about him.

“ Let me refresh your memory; dark brown, curly-haired genius who sits behind you in Anatomy and according to you has ‘perfect brown eyes that make me want to jump off a bridge’?” Kim reminded you as you playfully hit her shoulder.

You were never the type to be boy crazy and you weren’t one of the girls who felt their knees buckle every time they saw him, but whenever he would wave or smile at you in class, you had to physically stop yourself from blushing like a schoolgirl.

In all honesty, you wouldn’t say you and Josh were friends, a better-suited term would be classmates that occasionally talked about things outside of school ever now and then. 

“ Look, as much as I would love to go to a party where I know no one and where the host hates me, I’m not going to go to a party just because Josh is going to be there. I don’t care how cute he is, I’m busy dealing with you know who,” You said as you heard someone chuckle behind you.

“ You think I’m cute?”

Your heart dropped to the floor as you turned around to see Josh standing behind you with a wide smirk on his face. You could feel your throat hitch as you quickly looked Josh up and down to make sure he was not a figment of your imagination.

It was nearly impossible for anyone to look good in a school uniform but of course, Josh managed to pull it off every time. His tie was loosely undone around his white collar and his sleeves were rolled up all the way to his elbows and you were 100% on board with it.

For a moment, you felt actual sympathy for Peter because now you understood how he must be feeling.

Without a second thought, you felt your binder slip out of your hands and once it hit the floor, your notes came out of the binder pocket.

You both took a moment to stare at the papers on the floor but Josh was the first one to bend down and pick some of them up.

You snapped out of your daze and kneeled down in front of him awkwardly as you helped him pick up your notes,” I’m sorry, you just startled me.”

Josh let out a small laugh as he shook his head,” Well, I didn’t mean to scare you. I was hoping to do the opposite actually. I was calling your name earlier but I guess you were too busy talking about...me.”

You pressed your lips together as you tried to avoid his gaze, as if that would help the blush fade away,” Yeah, about that, Kim was just telling me that you were planning to go to some party this weekend. Apparently, your band is playing right?”

You looked over your shoulder to look up at Kim but she was nowhere to be seen. Coward.

“ Amber’s party, yeah,” Josh said as you neatly put your stack of papers into your binder,” I didn’t mean to eavesdrop but were you saying that you aren’t going?”

Your heart skipped a beat as you looked up at Josh and you felt stupid for feeling so nervous around him.

 By all means, you were not in love with him and saying that he was your crush was pushing it a bit.

All you knew was that apparently, Josh had been asking about you and that alone made something inside of you click.

You cleared your throat as you nodded, tearing your eyes away from his,” I mean, I would love to go but I might have plans.”

“ That’s too bad, I was kinda hoping I would see you there,” Josh said quietly, his face slightly flushed,” but don’t worry about it. I’m sure whatever you have going on is more important than just some party.”

You didn’t even realize you were both reaching for the same page of notes until his hand rested against yours for a moment. Your heart stopped as you waited for him to pull his hand away but he kept it on top of yours.

After a few seconds passed, Josh held your hand tightly as he helped you stand up again. He gave your hand one last squeeze before he let his hand fall to the side.

What the hell is happening?

As much as you wanted to go to the party, all you could think about was Peter. You knew that more than ever, he needed you and if your dad needed your help in the lab, you wanted to be there.

Then, as if your mind was telling you to reconsider, it pushed forward the conversation you had with Peter before he made contact with the lovedust.

“ You wasted your whole high school years on never accomplishing anything. You never went to a single party, you never passed your drivers test, and you’ve never even had a boyfriend before.”

A part of you couldn’t even believe Peter would ever say something like that because of how obsessed he is over you. Yet, that memory of Peter was only a few days ago.

You couldn’t just let it all go, you knew he was capable of saying hurtful things and for once, you didn’t want to worry about someone else.

For the first time ever, you were going to be selfish.

“ Maybe I can stop by to say hi or something to listen to your band,” You said as you watched him smile back,” but I can’t promise anything.”

Josh flipped his blazer over his shoulder and smirked,” Too late, I’m already looking forward to seeing you there.”

Josh gave a small wave before walking back over to his friends who were leaned up against the lockers. As you walked away, you felt like a huge weight had been lifted off of your shoulders.

When you got to the front doors, you looked out the windows and watched the rain quietly. Of course, Peter was right.

You had planned to walk to the subway station after school since you knew your dad would be too busy fixing Peter to pick you up but if you would have known it was going to rain, you would’ve asked Kim to take you home.

You opened up the glass doors and held your textbook over your head, thankful for once that Mr. Carter had assigned homework from this mammoth of a book.  As you made your way down the stairs, you spotted a familiar face waiting on the bench in the courtyard with an umbrella.

“ Peter?” You called out as his head snapped up to see you,” what are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be in the lab?”

Peter stood up and held the umbrella closer to you so you wouldn’t get wet and rubbed the back of his neck.

“ Your dad and Banner have been running tests on me all morning so they sent me to my room to rest for a bit. But then I saw that you forgot your umbrella and I didn’t want you to walk to the subway in the rain,” Peter said as the two of you shared the umbrella,” so here I am.”

“ You didn’t have to come all this way...but thank you,” You said as the two of you walked out the gates. 

Peter smiled as you interlocked your arms with him to get closer. As the two of you made your way across town, you both exchanged how your day went but when it came to talking about yours,  you purposely left out the part about Josh and the party.

You didn’t know why you would even keep it from him but you just kept telling yourself that what Peter didn’t know, couldn’t hurt him. Plus, if Peter found out about your interaction with Josh, there could be a possibility that he would be on a whole other level of jealousy and frankly, you didn’t have the time.

“ So, I read your note,” You said as you felt Peter tense up beside you,” you said you’d make it up to me and now I’m intrigued. What did you have in mind?”

“ A lot of things, if we’re thinking about someplace romantic there’s this-” Peter stopped himself and shook his head before taking a breath,” sorry. I’m just trying to get better at controlling what I say around you. I was just going to say that there’s this place around the corner that makes really good milkshakes and I thought it would be a nice date- as friends! Just friends. Unless you want to- fuck! I’m sorry Y/N, I’m just going to shut up now.”

You couldn’t stop yourself from letting out a small laugh as Peter shook his head,” You’re such a sap, Parker. It really is never a dull moment with you.”

Peter opened up the diner doors and as soon as you stepped in, you felt like you had been transported back in time.

The floor was sketched in the iconic black and white checkered print and the platinum bar had bright red stools along the outside. 

Just from your spot in the front, you could smell the peppermint disinfectant that they used to wipe down the tables but you were most focused on the jukebox in the corner as a Ritchie Valens song started to play in the background.

“ How did you find this place?” You asked as Peter led you to one of the booths in the corner of the diner.

“ I always knew about it but I figured it wouldn’t be fun without bringing someone along,” Peter admitted as you looked around at the old, decorative records across the wall,” I know how much you like those old movies so I thought it would be nice to take you back to the fun part of the 50s without the, you know, racism.”

You shook your head laughing as you turned your attention to the menu,” Nothing says the 50s like institutionalized racism and systemic oppression of women.”

Once the waitress arrived at the booth, Peter ordered a milkshake for the two of you to share and while you felt yourself falling deeper into the cliche, you couldn’t oppose since he was paying.

When the waitress left, Peter turned back to you and rested his hands on the table nervously. You couldn’t even imagine what he was thinking about but that in itself made you stand up straighter.

“ Can I ask you something? You don’t have to answer it if you don’t want to but I’m just curious,” You asked as Peter nodded enthusiastically.

“ What does the lovedust feel like?” You asked as Peter raised his eyebrow,” I mean, how does it make you feel... about me?”

Peter felt the inside of his mouth dry up as he croaked,” Do you mean- are you asking me what it feels like to be in love with you? Because honestly Y/N,  it feels so weird-”

“ Being in love with me is weird?”

“ Well yeah! Wait no! No, it’s not weird!” Peter stammered as you watched him get more and more nervous,” it’s not weird to love you but my body feels weird around you. My hands are constantly sweaty and clammy and sometimes it’s hard to even focus on small things like breathing. I can’t even shower without thinking of you- not like that- well kinda like that- but every time I have a quiet moment to myself, all my mind wants to think about is you. When your dad was running tests on me this morning, all I could think about was how you two shared the same last name and one day-hopefully-I can change your last name to Parker- okay see I can’t stop what comes out of my mouth when I’m on a roll!”  

As your mind started to break down every sentence he said, the waitress gave Peter a strange look before placing the milkshake in front of the two of you.

“ Wow, okay that was... a lot. You could’ve left out about half of that but I’ll give you a pass because I feel sorry for you,” You admitted as you took the paper wrapping off of the straw and dipped it into your milkshake,” but is there anything else? Like is there any part of you that still hates me? Or is it all gone because of the lovedust?”

Peter furrowed his eyebrows as you leaned over to take a sip,” Hate you? I never hated you Y/N.”

You pulled your lips away from the straw and sat back,” What do you mean you never hated me? I’m pretty sure you hated me, we were so mean to each other. Like our relationship was toxic as hell.”

Peter lightly banged his straw against the table and tore off the paper around the straw without looking at you.

“ I never hated you. Was I a huge dick to you? Of course I was. Was it entertaining watching you air out your room after I left smoke bombs in it before your friends came over? Kinda yeah. But I never did it because I hated you. I would never do those things out of pure malice but...it’s hard for me to look back and imagine us hating each other when I’m head over heels for you now,” Peter sighed as he started playing with the wrappings of the straw.

It was hard to believe that after all this time Peter never hated you because there were countless times for you where you really hated him and planned to murder him in his sleep without a second thought.

“ I’m not going to lie, I hated you. Some days, you made me feel so shitty about myself that I would cry underneath my covers so no one could hear,” You revealed to him as Peter felt a wave of sadness wash over him,” After a while, I wasn’t even sad anymore I was just so exhausted. I felt like I always had to be on my toes around you just in case you would pull something on me and to make sure you would never make me cry again, I knew I would always have to have the upper hand.”

You watched Peter almost sulk back into his seat, his mind swarming with memories of how awful he really was to you,” Y/N, I am so sorry I ever treated you like that. I never knew I made you cry. I know I’m sick with the powder but even if I wasn’t, I would still feel as miserable as I do right now...I’m a monster aren’t I?”

You wanted to be as honest as possible with Peter but in the state that he was in at the moment, you weren’t sure if he was in the right mental headspace to hear any harsh criticism.

“ We were both monsters...but now we’re different. This is the first time in years where I’ve actually enjoyed your company and while I’m not ready to start picking out baby names or whatever you’re trying to do with me, I like what we have. I just hope that when you get cured, things don’t have to change, you know?” You said as you reached across the table and opened up your hand.

You never knew how important starting over was until now and you knew that no matter what, Peter would always be in your life. The only question was what he really meant to you but at this moment, you didn’t have an answer and it was okay.

Peter looked down at it and hesitantly held it, his fingers caressing over your knuckles lightly as he inhaled deeply,” As long as you’re in my life, things don’t have to change.”

You squeezed his hand as you leaned in to take another sip. When you pulled away, you leaned back into your seat as you playfully sighed,” You know, I can’t decide if I’m weirded out or flattered by your comments lately but at the same time, I kinda wanna just open the flood gates and see what kind of crazy stuff you say so I can blackmail you later on.”

Peter only shook his head as his face started to grow flushed,” Y/N, please,  if I could control my mouth, I would. Once I start talking, every single thought in my mind surges with your face and how I feel like how fucking amazing you look in your uniform-”

“ Nope, nuh-uh, we can stop it right there pervert.”

@eridanuswave​ @juliet-winterson​ @akacalumtrash​ @ilovepeterparker13​

@parkerboop​ @juliebean247​ @multi-fan-lover​ @ffffan-----girlll @lukesbabylon​

@danicarosaline​ @parkeret​ @marvel4geeks​ @hollander69​ @spideyyeet​ @spn-assemble-seven​ @vibraniumdaisies​ @spaghetittiesbcimgay​ @vi-bi-bye

@lemonsnips​ @aduky​ @faithfullcompanion​ @stopthemotherfuckingmusic 

@satellitespidey @foreverpark​ @marvelobsessedteenager​ @deadpoetsbackup

@zalladane​ @starcourt-s​ @parkersinfinitywar​ @stargazingcarol​ @littlesugarb​

@itsteph13​ @jennasmmith​ @liljennyx3​ @harryspet​  @todaynotseen @oh-whatabeautiful-parker​  @tiny-friggin-human @ popluckbih    niiight-dreamerrrr     sovereignparker  marie-is-in-the-dark  buckyboy-soldier   maia030   parkershoco  wolverinesbeer   cherrysruin  sunkissdes  kiainspace  songofcosplay  spideylovin  write-from-the-heart  thatcrazywhovian09   eternallyvenus  thollandx msrawog  idiosadeoro  imawkwardandhereweare  foundwolves  thequeen-oni  silverwolf-sama  inspiring-bea  multiversegalaxygirl   lastupidebitchette idekwho1am

[fromthedeskofelizabeththird]

Habanero

You're a good girl, well behaved.

Absolutely not the type to rail random guys in nightclubs.

Until you are.

Fandom: BNHA

Pairing: Aizawa x Reader, eventual polyamorous Erasermic x Reader

Rating: Gen

Trigger Warnings: Referenced child abuse, blood

AO3: Here | Want to support me? I have a Kofi

Chapter: 4/16 (all chapters)

You were scared of a lot of things: bugs, dark places, ghosts, drowning and more. Your friends often joked that you were a wimp and you’d bever been inclined to disagree.

There was one thing, however, that scared you above all others. It sent shivers down your spine and left your legs wobbling from under you.

It was the door to your father’s home office.

Your father was a prosecutor and a pretty notorious one at that, famous for the number of guilty verdicts he had achieved over the years. He had an incredible advantage, of course- the same lie detection quirk that he had passed onto you. He spent most of his evenings alternating between his work and home offices, going over the details of cases and preparing for a never ending stream of plaintiffs.

His home office was a near perfect replica of the one in the city, complete with a golden name plaque on the door. You passed it every day, multiple times a day, and each time broke out in goosebumps as if the door watched you in turn.

It wasn’t only the plaintiffs your father needed to find guilty.

Your father was not in the least bit conservative with his quirk. You spent many an afternoon there, jaw clenched and skin crawling at his line of questioning.

Tell me… why were you late?

Tell me… how long did you study?

Tell me… who were you with?

You hated being left so exposed and, in retrospect, you weren’t in the least bit surprised that you ended up vanilla instead of habanero, desperately seeking a simple married life.

The anxiety of standing outside of your father’s home office stayed with you into adulthood, even now that you had your own home. You had started to believe it no longer had an effect on you; that you no longer remembered how it felt.

As you stood outside of the hospital door, though, you remembered clearly.

Hand trembling, you reached up to knock.

━

SEVERAL HOURS EARLIER

“Maybe if I move it that way…”

You scrolled through your calendar and let out a sigh at the appointments already there.

“No good, no good.”

You sat back in your chair and stretched, popping your shoulders and wiggling your toes.

“Maybe…”

You had a moment of inspiration, only to groan and click out of the window.

With the sports festival around the corner, your schedule was on the verge of taking a beating. Between modifying your office hours to make appointments with students to discuss their offers, to making room for counselling for those suffering disappointment, to keeping your usual appointments and open office hours, you were starting to consider bringing a futon and moving into your office for the foreseeable future. You’d known it was going to be a tight squeeze, but hadn’t counted on it being this bad.

You logged out of your computer and climbed out of your chair, giving your back a quick rub before leaving your office. You needed an IV of coffee, but a cup would have to do.

You were still thinking about your itinerary as you passed the 1-A classroom. Normally, between Kirishima, Bakugo and Iida, you heard the classroom long before you passed it. Today, though, it was silent and you peered through the window.

You’d heard that they were going on a trip with Thirteen to the USJ for specialist training and, if their empty desks were anything to go by, had already left. You had taken a tour of the facility during your initial induction and it had taken everything you had to keep your jaw from hitting the ground. You knew that UA was well funded, but it didn’t really sink in until then.

You wondered how they were getting on. Had Bakugou destroyed anything yet? Had Midoriya broken any of his bones?

You were still considering it as you passed the faculty lounge, dragged out of your thoughts by the sound of voices within. It sounded like the principal, though you weren’t sure who he was speaking to. You wondered if it was a private conversation and you should come back another time.

You knocked a couple of times before peeping around the door.

“Sorry,” you said, “am I interrupting?”

You really had heard the principal and he appeared to be sharing tea with All Might.

You weren’t sure you would ever be prepared for the sight of All Might in his skinnier form. Like most youngsters of your generation, you had watched his heroic acts in awe. You hadn’t known he was going to join the faculty at the time of your own job application and still found your heart racing whenever you passed him in the corridors.

You had signed eighteen different nondisclosure agreements after successfully taking on the job at UA, of which well over half related to the Symbol of Peace. You knew that he had been injured very badly and was losing his strength at an alarming rate. Even so, it was difficult to adjust to the reality.

“Ah, (Name), come in, come in,” said Principal Nezu, “we were just sharing a cup of tea, would you like some?”

You wanted coffee, but Nezu had already started to pour.

“Of course,” you said, closing the door behind you and taking a seat.

“You got here just in time,” said Nezu, pushing your cup across the coffee table. “We were discussing the fundamentals of teaching.”

“That sounds interesting,” you said, taking a sip of tea. “You must have a lot of insight.”

All Might twitched beside you, visibly restless. You wondered how long Nezu had been talking.

“Apologies,” he said, setting down his cup, “I should get going. I’ve already rested for far too long.”

He got up and walked towards the door, taking a deep breath before transforming into the muscular form the world knew and loved.

You would never get used to that either.

“So, (Name),” said Principal Nezu, “how are you finding the school? I trust you’ve had support from our staff?”

“Everyone’s been really kind,” you said. “I know they’re busy with their own workloads this term, but they’ve had so much time for me.”

You wrapped your hands around your cup, warmth flooding your fingers. You wanted to explain how grateful you were for the opportunity -that not so long ago your life had been falling apart- but you never got the chance, for the door to the lounge flew open and a student stormed inside.

“Principal Nezu! Something terrible has happened!”

It was Iida from 1-A, dressed in his hero costume and visibly out of breath. Your blood ran cold and you glanced across at Nezu, who had gotten to his feet.

“USJ...there’s been an invasion at USJ! Please help!”

Nezu’s response to the matter was swift and efficient. He turned to you, visibly transformed from the mild mannered principal who had offered you a cup of tea.

“(Name),” he said. “I’m going to gather everyone available. I need you to liaise with the authorities.”

“Of course,” you said, setting aside your tea and whipping out your phone.

“Meet us there,” he said as you began to dial.

“S-sir?”

You weren’t a pro hero; what possible use could you be?

━

His intentions soon became clear.

While your colleagues rushed into the danger zone, you stayed behind with the police, hitching a ride with Tsukauchi to the station once the area was secure.

Time was of the essence. You had read enough crime statistics to know that villain attacks very often came in waves, making the next few hours crucial to the safety of UA. Having a human lie detector on hand during the interrogations was more than a little bit useful.

You only wished you could concentrate.

Everything you knew about the incident came straight from Tsukauchi, so even though you had never actually seen the full extent of the carnage, you knew enough for your imagination to run wild.

You knew that the students had escaped with minor injuries and, while Shouta was badly hurt, he wasn’t dead. You couldn’t stop thinking about it, especially since the only image of the incident you had seen was that of his goggles broken on the floor.

You sat beside Tsukauchi in the interrogation room, silent as they brought in prisoner after prisoner. You only spoke to activate your quirk; only dragged yourself out of your contemplations to ask the same set of questions.

Three hours later, you knew only fractionally more than you did to begin with. The villains you’d caught were blatant throwaways, with no knowledge at all of the man they’d followed into battle or a greater scheme. They’d all wanted to take a shot at the symbol of peace and had no idea how close they had come to succeeding.

“Are you going to be alright?” Tsukauchi asked as interrogations came to a close.

You knew you must have looked a mess, popping aspirin and pinching the bridge of your nose.

“I’ll be fine,” you said, “honestly.”

“I’ll organise a car to take you to UA,” he said, but you shook your head.

“No, no that’s okay. I need to go somewhere first.”

━

Technically, you had two places to go first.

You stopped by the police station washroom to freshen up, leaning over the sink as the migraine set in. You pinched the bridge of your nose and watched as it began to bleed.

You weren’t used to using your quirk for such a long period of time and had almost certainly overdone it. The bleeding began to slow and you switched on the tap, washing away the blood on your face before plugging your nostrils with tissue paper. Unfortunately, you had still managed to bleed on your collar.

Just your luck that you would use your quirk too much on the day you decided to wear your new white blouse. You cursed at your reflection, trying and failing to adjust your shirt in such a way that it wasn’t noticeable.

Even now, you couldn’t concentrate.

You had never crossed paths with so many villains in one day. You had watched your father cross examine witnesses and plaintiffs many, many times, but had never been in his shoes. You hated it.

You knew exactly how they felt when you activated your quirk, recognised the squirming as it crawled through their skin. Part of you had enjoyed it, knowing that their discomfort in that moment did not compare to the violence they had inflicted on others.

Shouta.

The violence they had inflicted on Shouta.

He was a hero, you told yourself. He had signed up to fight those very same villains.

Even so, you hated them for it in ways you’d never hated a villain before.

You thought back to your training and took a deep breath.

“This is normal,” you whispered. “This is normal. This is a negative emotional response to a distressing situation. This is normal, we’ll move on.”

You took another deep breath, but your heart still rattled.

What is it that’s bothering me?

You reached into your purse for your makeup, painting away the shock for now at least.

We can work through that later.

━

PRESENT

And so, there you were, standing outside of Shouta’s room in the hospital.

They’d put him under the care of one of the best doctors in Musutafu, who assured you that surgery had been a success and his life was not in danger. There was a high chance his quirk would be affected by the damage to his orbital floor but even that was lucky, all things considered.

You tapped at the door and let yourself inside, taking in the calm and quiet of the room. Shouta was tucked up in bed and connected to numerous monitors, their steady beeps breaking the silence. You closed the door behind you and crept over to the bed, taking in the bandages that covered almost every inch of his body.

You had always known that heroes risked death and worse on a daily basis but had never seen it in person. You didn’t know how to feel about seeing him bloodied and broken. You had seen this man naked; you’d held onto the arms that a villain had broken. Did it always feel this personal?

You took a seat next to his bed, taking note of exactly how much of him was covered in bandages. You wouldn’t have known it was him if you hadn’t been told otherwise.

You didn't know what you had expected to find at the hospital, only that it would give you closure.

Why, then, did you still feel so uneasy?

You recalled his words from only recently, after you had given him a faceful of pepper spray.

Why would you try and confront a villain without help? You could have gotten yourself killed.

You need to be more rational in these things. Running head on into danger gets people killed.

Why hadn’t he followed his own advice?

Truthfully, you knew exactly why.

He had been well aware of the danger, but made the call anyway. He had analysed the situation and prioritised the lives and safety of his students over his own. It was the right thing to do and the rational part of you knew that, but you didn’t feel very rational right then.

You had to report back to Nezu; had to adjust your schedule ready for trauma counselling. You weren’t the only one who had been exposed to an unprecedented amount of villains that day. 1-A had almost certainly seen too much too soon.

You knew you had to leave, yet felt guilty as you got to your feet.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, hoping that your words would reach him through the anesthesia. “I have to go...but I’ll be back tomorrow, okay?”

You promised yourself that you’d skip lunch if you had to.

“See you,” you said, leaning over to kiss his forehead as if on autopilot.

Your heart skipped a beat once you realised what you’d done.

Oh God, what were you thinking?

You reached into your purse for your chapstick as you left the room, so focused on painting away the kiss that you didn’t notice his fingers twitch.

[solar-pxwered]

A List Of Norman Reedus Movies/Shows I Have Seen And My Opinions On Them

1. The Boondock Saints

The Best. A classic. Bloody and inappropriate and if I remember my count correctly, contains 194 “fucks” or variations of it (this movie certainly illustrates the diversity of the word). Terrible Irish accents. A KICKASS soundtrack. Willem DeFoe crossdressing. Dropping toilets on people’s heads. Over the top action sequences. Cheesy dialogue. Campy as fuck. I freakin’ love it.

2. The Boondock Saints 2: All Saints Day

Some people didn’t like this one as much as the first one, and I admit that I wasn’t as fond of the new detective in this one as I was of Smecker...but, overall, I really enjoyed it and I drove 2 hours to see it in theaters. I love Romeo more than Rocco. The humor was on point. It was nice to see the original actors for Doc, Dolly, Duffy and Greenley. There was more terrible Irish accents, another KICKASS soundtrack, cheesy dialogue, over the top action sequences, still campy as fuck. I freaking love it.

3. The Walking Dead

Cannot even describe how much I love this show. I have ALWAYS loved zombie related shows and movies so this show was right up my alley from the very beginning all the way back in 2010. I watched it religiously every Sunday. I adore this roller coaster ride of a show and I especially adore Daryl, Carol and Jerry. This show has it all: Comedy, drama (hella lots of that), tragedy and triumph...and it never fails to pulls me in and hold my interest.

4. Mimic

Honestly, I saw this a LONG time ago and I hated it because...well, because I have a cockroach phobia, ok?! Don’t judge. Norman’s part was pretty small, not one of his lasting impressions on me.

5. Six Ways To Sunday

This is a weird one. It’s about an overly innocent 18 year (played by Norman) who gets involved in the Mob and develops an alter ego that’s violent and his complete opposite. There’s murder, prostitutes and good ol’ fashioned mother-son incest and it wasn’t a movie I suggest for the lighthearted or anyone with those sort of triggers. 

That being said, I watched the whole thing and didn’t hate it. It was just uncomfortable...as seems to be a theme with Norman Reedus movies.

6. Dark Harbor

This fucking movie...

Ok, so, I’ll be straight with you: I really enjoyed this dumbass movie. It had me guessing right up to the very end and it took me on a very strange ride along the way. 

If watching someone sexually feed a woman a poisonous mushroom, lots of dark eyed staring scenes or Norman Reedus making out with Alan Rickman is your thing, then go for it. 

7. Let the Devil Wear Black

It’s modern Hamlet. What else is there to say? If you like Hamlet, you’ll like this movie. If you like pre-car accident, baby face Reedus with the black hair, you’ll like this movie. I liked it.

8. 8MM

You know what the best thing about this movie is? Nicholas Cage. He steals the damn show no matter what movie he’s in and no one can even deny that fact. Norman’s part in this one is pretty small too but I liked this movie anyway because...well, Nick Cage. Enough said.

9. Bad Seed

I honestly can’t remember how this movie ends, all I remember was that it wasn’t at all how I expected it. I liked this movie because it’s a psychological thriller and that’s my most favorite genre of all time. The movie’s premise is a guy suspects his wife of having an affair and comes home one night and finds her murdered so he goes after her lover (Reedus) to try and kill him because he believes he was the one who killed her. It’s a cat and mouse chase sort of thing...now I need to rewatch it because I can’t, for the life of me, remember how it ends.

10. Gossip

Ok, no JOKE, this is the best movie I ever randomly discovered and I can’t believe how many people have never heard of it! It’s got some big names in it (Lena Headey, Norman Reedus, James Marsden and Kate Hudson to name a few).

It’s a psychological thriller/mystery drama in which three friends start a rumor at their school as a social experiment for their class. The rumor grows, however, and suddenly it’s out of their hands and spiraling out of control. People start getting hurt, reputations get dragged through the mud and then it escalates to the point of someone losing their life. The three main characters {Reedus, Headey and Marsden) try to figure out the truth behind the out of control rumors and discover more than they ever imagined, or ever wanted.

I HIGHLY recommend this movie. I really, REALLY do. The ending is one of the best twists I’ve seen in a LONG time.

11. The Beatnicks

This movie is so weird. It’s like...it’s just really weird. It revolves around two beat poets who find a magic box that somehow magically helps them get good at being poets but it’s like...an evil box and so they decide to only use it once and then get rid of it. Yeah, it’s a weird movie. Not my highest suggestion.

12. Blade II

Ok, if you’ve never seen the Blade Trilogy then I just don’t even know what to tell you. 

My favorite of the three movies, Blade 2 gives us the glorious Reedus character of Scud, the pot smoking, horrible-shirt-wearing, mechanical genius and Blade’s sidekick. Not only is he precious and adorable, the movie in all is enjoyable and has a fun rave-esque soundtrack. 

The one thing I hate? *SPOILER ALERT* Scud’s scummy betrayal.

13. Tough Luck

This is another one of those movies that I liked but it’s just so freaking weird. 

It’s a psychological drama where a down on his luck con artist, Archie (Reedus), tries to rip off a carnival worker and gets caught. As punishment, he’s hired to work at the carnival  to pay off the debt. He gets involved in a scheme to murder the owner’s wife, but falls in love with her in the process.

Things go to shit. He gets the short end of the stick. More plots and lies develop. It’s all twisted until the end and the answers fall into place.

I really like this movie, it’s one that I kept and still have my copy of. 

A word of warning though, never leave this movie on your movie shelf for your father to find and watch while you’re away at college, resulting in your mother calling you and asking you why you have such a nasty movie. Because the sex scene at the end is OUTRAGEOUS. I mean, it is the FUNNIEST fucking sex scene I have ever seen in my life and I can’t ever watch it without cringing and laughing. My mother, however, didn’t think it was funny at all and my father was too shocked to even form a sentence.

I highly suggest this trippy as hell movie.

14. Octane

Ok, to be fair, this movie is actually alright, although Norman’s character gets the shittiest death possible. I mean, imagine dying because some psycho vampire kisses you and bites your tongue out. That’s one shitty death.

But, overall, this is a good thriller. Johnathan Rhys Meyers plays the villain and he’s always pretty quality. The story is basically a teenager has a disagreement with her mom and gets picked up by this drugged up, blood sucking, vampire wannabe cult and indoctrinated joining them. Her mother joins up with a tow truck driver (Reedus) whose daughter was also kidnapped years ago and who has been hunting the cult down ever since. 

It was a cringe filled, yet interesting, movie and I didn’t hate it.

15. John Carpenter’s Cigarette Burns

This is John Carpenter....OF COURSE I liked this one. 

I won’t say what it’s about because that would ruin the story, but it’s part of an anthology and John Carpenter loved Norman’s role so much he STILL talks about it today and suggests Norman to people in the industry.

It’s a good one if you’re into horror shorts or anthologies or the genius of the legend that is John Carpenter.

16. A Crime

I had completely forgotten about this movie until I started making this post, but now that I remember...I REALLY liked this one!!

This is a pretty sad one, but it was very good and Norman’s acting in it is absolutely wonderful. His character’s wife was murdered and the suspect was never found so his neighbor, who really likes him, creates a fake culprit so that he can finally get some closure. 

This is a good one. I suggest this one if you’re in the mood for a strange sort of romance movie that has underlying thriller tones.

17. Moscow Chill

I remember watching this one, and I remember enjoying it, but I honestly can’t remember anything about it except that it’s a Russian film in which Norman plays a computer hacker who gets hired to hack into a Russian bank and gets caught and put in prison. But I honestly can’t remember what happens in detail.

If you like foreign movies with hacking and subterfuge plots, then give it a try because I do remember enjoying it while I watched.

18. Red Canyon

This one is kinda fucked up. Imagine Daryl Dixon mixed with Breaking Bad mixed with Deliverance and you’ve pretty much got the story...

A brother and sister return to their mother’s hometown to settle things and put their horrible past behind them...but upon returning they end up reliving the nightmare all over again.

It’s a good thriller/horror watch, but there are scenes of sexual violence so if that’s not something you can handle, then don’t watch this one.

19. Hero Wanted

This. Is. A. GOOD. Movie.

Cuba Gooding Jr. is the lead and he does an AMAZING job. Gooding’s character is a garbage man who falls in love with a girl who never takes any notice of him. To get her attention, he stages a heist in which he is supposed to jump in, save the day, and win the girl...only the heist turns out to be real and he is shot and the girl is also shot in the process. He sets out for revenge and gets in way over his head.

Norman’s part in this isn’t very big...but HOLY SHIT, was it impactful. His character didn’t have a lot of screen time, in comparison to a lot of other people, but he had a solid backstory and reason for being involved and MY GOD did I cry about it. This was actually the first movie of his I watched AFTER discovering Boondock Saints and it solidified my love for his acting abilities.

A very good watch. Highly suggest.

20. Messengers 2: The Scarecrow

This one is pretty ok, actually, as far as lame horror movies go. 

The plot is simple: Blonde, beardy, corn farmer Norman gets slowly driven insane by the haunted scarecrow in his field that he thinks putting up is a good idea for some damn reason. He starts to get more and more violent and rapey as time goes on until his family is forced to take up arms against him.

It’s not bad. Second part in what I THINK is a trilogy? I’ve only ever seen the first two. If you like horror movies then this one is a good watch. As I mentioned though, there is an attempted rape scene in this one so just be aware.

21: Pandorum

It’s an alien movie. Astronauts run into a species that is stronger and hungry for tasty humans. Shepard (Norman’s character) doesn’t make it out alive. If you’re not in the mood to see Norman get LITERALLY gutted or other characters get nommed by aliens, then don’t watch.

If you ARE, then go ahead and watch, because it was pretty alright.

[readyplayerhobi]

Flower | 06

; Hoseok x Reader

; Genre: Fluff, slight angst

; Word Count: 2.7k

; Synopsis: You finally decide to take a dip into the world of online dating and find the Flower dating app. One of the top matches for you proves to be a guy who looks to be your complete opposite; tattooed, pierced, a metalhead and oh…incredibly handsome. What happens when you throw caution to the wind and reach out to him?

; A/N: Another part :D please let me know what you think and all that jazz. If you enjoyed it, please consider reblogging to let others find it too! :)

; Flower Masterpost

-

You don’t get very long to swoon over the date to yourself, for the very next morning you wake up to an abundance of texts from your two very impatient best friends. It’s a wonder your phone has any battery left given how many messages they’d sent into the group chat you all shared and it’s with more than a little bemusement that you respond to them both by asking if they’d sent enough.

That had only inspired a barrage of even more messages, leading to you simply telling them both to come over. They would have done that anyway, you knew that, but the official invitation at least gave them the excuse that they were wanted.

Which they were, because of course you wanted to gush and squeal to them along with analyse every bit of the previous nights date. It had been too late when you came home for them to come over and you’d felt tired, bone-weary even. Unlike your effervescent friends, you often liked to say that you had a social battery.

You were happy to socialise with people you got on with and understood until that battery depleted, upon which you simply wanted to go home and recharge. People took a lot out of you, and events like last night were particularly draining for you due to your nerves.

As such, you’d gone to sleep at 11pm and ended up sleeping straight through till 10am, completely oblivious to the impatience of your best friends. But now they were here, in the living room of your small apartment and practically sitting on you in their desperation to hear all about your night of debauchery.

That was a joke, they knew you well enough to know that would never happen.

Though they had been thoroughly entertained by his dick vomit story. Poor guy. He hadn’t even met them and now he was forever associated with a story like...that. You’d apologise whenever you saw him again, or at least before they ever got to introduce themselves.

Still, it was fun though as you retold the events of the night to them. They were charmed by the fact he’d taken you to an escape room and you knew that it meant a lot to them that he’d been so careful and sweet regarding your shy personality. The fact that you were talking about him with such enthusiasm and that tiny smile that said you were trying to hold back a grin told them everything and you sensed their overwhelming happiness for you.

“I can’t believe you went on a rant about to milk an almond.” Chungha groans, dainty hand slapping at her forehead before she runs her fingers through her long, ice-blonde hair. Her face was completely empty of makeup but you’d already promised her that you’d do it for her later. She had a date herself tonight, which you and Soyeon were pleased about.

Unlike you though, she’d met this guy through her work. You hoped it would be good for her though, even if boyfriends did often take your friends away from you for a while. 

“Well he started it. Or did I? I don’t remember. Either way, he completely agreed with me. The first people to do things must have been truly wild. I mean, think about it. Who was the first person to look at a cow’s udder and go ‘...I’m gonna have me some of that!’” You point out, eyes wide as you tried to convince them of your point.

Both of them just stared at you before Soyeon sighed deeply, flopping back onto the couch and shifting until her fluffy sock covered feet were in your lap. You pushed at them lightly, nose turning up but she ignored you completely, just letting out a deep groan.

“I mean...you’re not wrong. It is weird. But that is so not first date conversation!” She lets out another groan that sounds almost like it comes from her stomach and you feel your body heat up in embarrassment.

“Well he didn’t complain. If anything, he encouraged it. Asked me how do you milk an oat?” Your voice is defensive, lips pursed in a petulant pout and there’s silence from them both for a minute. And then Chungha is running her fingers down your arm with a defeated smile, shaking her head.

“It sounds like you’ve got a winner there girl.” Everything goes quiet for a few minutes after that and you feel the stirring of anxiety and panic in your stomach that you’d done something wrong. It only takes the tiniest signal from your brain before your body goes into overdrive, muscles tightening while everything feels like a livewire and your mind begins to run over the date obsessively, picking over anything that you think you were too forward or stupid on.

Anything to prove that you’d made an idiot out of yourself and that you would never hear from Jung Hoseok again.

“Do you think I messed up?” The words are so soft, every syllable laced tightly with fear and worry as you stare down at the fuzzy pink socks Soyeon is wearing. They have prancing unicorns on them and pretty rainbows. You’d bought her them for Christmas last year and had a matching pair of your own in your extensive sock drawer.

The two of them don’t need to be experts to hear the vulnerability in your voice and they’ve both known you long enough to know that your mind is compulsively finding ways to convince you that everything went wrong. That Hoseok had been weirded out by you and didn’t want to see you again, despite his commitment to texting you.

Guys did that, didn’t they? Said they’d text or call and never did.

Maybe it was a stereotype or something. Who knows. But the sickness in your stomach tells you that it’s probably true here.

“Hey, hey no. Don’t do this. Don’t do it sweetie, don’t you dare take a good and fun date like that and twist it negative in that pretty head of yours. It genuinely sounds like you both had a great time. And you said yourself that he didn’t complain about your conversations, he even encouraged them and went along with you! He sounds like a great guy!” Chungha says earnestly, grasping your hand tightly between her own and squeezing with an encouraging smile.

Soyeon pokes at your stomach with a toe, giving you her own smile from where her head rests on the large Pusheen pillow that sits with pride on your couch. You hate touching feet so you don’t do anything, simply give her a glare that just causes her to smile prettily.

Unlike Chungha, she has nothing this afternoon so has decreed that she will be spending her time with you instead. You both had a ton of true crime documentaries to watch on Netflix!

“He does. And he walked you to your car. Besides all that, you sound into him. Don’t talk yourself out of it.” Chewing on your lip, you let out a quiet hum and shrug your shoulders. As much as you love your best friends, it was sometimes frustrating when all you wanted to do was vent and be negative when they were so persistent on cheering you up.

You knew why they were doing it, and you appreciated it. But getting out of your slumps had always been hard. And your mind found it far easier to destroy happy moments than to let go of the negative.

“Yeah but…” Chungha places her hand over your mouth gently, pressing just hard enough that you can’t say anything before raising her brows with a soothing smile. 

“No but’s. They’re not allowed in this conversation. Not unless you want to tell us what his butt was like. I mean...did you see it? Not naked obviously, but like...you know...in his jeans. Some guys have amazing asses.” And with that, you chuckle, the looming aura of sadness still prevalent inside you but momentarily pushed aside as you recall her ex. He had indeed been blessed with an ass.

“Ahh...unfortunately not. He looks like one of those guys who’s...moderately blessed in that department. Not that I was looking. Well I was totally looking. But he fills his jeans nicely, so there’s that.”

“Yeah but he has tattoos and piercings. That makes up for any lack of bubble butt. Besides, you don’t wanna date a guy with a better ass than you. That’s just depressing. Think of the squat envy you’d have.” That comes from your splayed out friend, slapping her own thighs with a pout and you roll your eyes at her, thoroughly amused.

“Please, you don’t have to worry about any butt envy or anything. Your ass is fine. My ass has too much going on anyway, maybe I should give some to him.” You lightly pinch Soyeon’s leg, laughing as she yelped and then pouted at you, rubbing at the place before waving her feet in your face.

Immediately you’re recoiling away, landing almost on top of Chungha who just watches you both playfight with exasperation.

“Maybe so, but it’s nice to have something to grip you know? Both male and female.” Soyeon says with a grin, wiggling her brows at you suggestively and you heat up at the idea of grabbing Hoseok’s ass like that. And then you think about him grabbing yours and you can practically feel the ghost of his hands on you.

It makes you shudder in delight, the fantasy a wonderful image and Soyeon giggles as she feels the movement from you.

“Oooh, you like that. You wanna touch Hoseok’s ass?” She teases and you stick your tongue out at her childishly.

“Okay...in the interest of honesty...I want to lick every tattoo he has until I’ve committed them all to memory and then just...bite him. Anywhere. I don’t even care where. Oh god, his neck. Guys...his neck is just so freaking...urgh. And his fingers! Argh, they’re just...long and perfect and all I could think was…” You break off then, body heating as you squirm at the thought of everything you’d just said while you press your hands to your hot cheeks, embarrassed at what you’d blurted out.

Everything was the truth and you knew that they could tell. What you most certainly were not telling them was that you’d imagined tracing along his tattoos with your tongue. Which had then led on to a delightful fantasy of him pleasuring you with his own tongue, that delightful ball piercing combining with those long fingers in your mind until his name had been a gasped prayer of satisfaction and pleasure in the quietness of the night.

And then suddenly your phone vibrates, the sound loud on the table in front of you and all three of you jump in alarm at it. There’s a moment of silence before you all look at each other and laugh, feeling ridiculous that you’d all gotten scared of a phone notification of all things.

Reaching out, you grunt as Soyeon accidentally kicks you in the stomach before your fingers grasp your phone. Your friends were adamant that your phone case was uncool, but you didn’t care. You liked the flip phone case, the design a cute and overly cartoonish strawberry in hot pink and mint green.

Eyes widening, you stare at the lit-lock screen in disbelief before Chungha is poking at your arm, leaning over to try and see what’s got you so shocked.

“What is it? Has your dad accidentally posted in your family chat again?” Yeah, he was never living that moment down when he’d accidentally sent a sext that was supposed to be for your mom into your family group chat. “Is it...oh my god. It’s him! Soyeon! He’s texted!”

Her squeal is appallingly loud, causing you to turn and glare at her yet you can’t find it in yourself to shush her. Because you want to squeal loudly as well as she’s right, it’s Hoseok. He’s texted. Like he said he was.

“Isn’t it supposed to be too over eager to text the next day?” Is all you say, your tone confused and you recognise that what you’ve just said it stupid. But you can’t think properly right now because all you feel is pure elation that sizzles and crackles in your veins, the nausea of panic earlier to now turn into nausea of excitement while you try your hardest not to smile.

He’d texted. Just like he said he would.

“Oh shut up woman. Are you seriously gonna turn him down messaging you?! This a sign he likes you! Really likes you! It’s not even noon and the man is trying to talk with you again! Answer him!” Soyeon says and you realise that she’s gotten up, peering over your shoulder at your phone screen as well.

Quietly, you unlock your phone and read the message from him a few times before licking your lips and responding.

Jung Hoseok [11:23am]: Hi. So...about that Instagram?

Jung Hoseok [11:23am]: Also, I know you’re not meant to double text but...last night was fun.

The second text comes in before you can properly respond and your eyes widen, noting that he seems to be pretty eager just like they’d said. Or at least...being polite.

Y/N [11:24am]: Hi...same. Hope I wasn’t too...weird

You send him your Instagram handle as well, wondering whether or not you’d posted any dumb photos on there recently. Before you can get too worked up over it though, you push the thought firmly away and decide that he’ll just have to put up with it. He didn’t seem to have been bothered by your quirks last night, and if he wanted to pursue anything further then you’d rather he realise sooner than later.

Jung Hoseok [11:26am]: Nah, you were fine. Best first date I’ve ever had

Jung Hoseok [11:27am]: I also found this out this morning and thought you’d like to hear, Fact Queen

Jung Hoseok [11:29am]: Did you know...Stan Lee almost made the Power Rangers. Saw it on a documentary I’m watching

Y/N: [11:30am]: The Toys That Made Us? On Netflix? It’s great!

Jung Hoseok [11:32am]: It is! Thought I’d tell you anyway

Y/N [11:33am]: :)

He goes quiet after that and you realise that your friends have both been sat silent, holding their breath as they read the conversation between you both. And when you look at them, your eyes widen when you see the matching broad grins they wear.

There’s a second of hesitation before they both squeal and wrap their arms around you tightly, squeezing you so hard.

“Oh my god! He so likes you! He gets you! Oh my god! Girl! You’ve lucked out!!” Chungha shrieks, shaking you violently by the shoulders while Soyeon is slapping your arm lightly in her excitement. Their positive energy is infectious and you find yourself laughing in response, the happiness inside you bubbling higher at Hoseok’s words.

He’d enjoyed last night. Really enjoyed it, if he was to be believed.

And not only did he not mind your weird sense of humour or fact based response mechanism, but he reciprocated it with something he thought you might find interesting. It made you feel warm and gooey.

Another vibration causes you to look down at your phone again, noting that there’s no new message this time from him. Instead, you see that someone called ‘jungsevenfold’ has followed you on Instagram.

Clicking on it, you see that it’s Hoseok’s profile. And just like his Facebook, it’s a hodgepodge of casual photos of him and his friends and more artistic and aesthetic photography shots. Shyly, you follow him back and then note the notifications that pop up on the bottom.

“Oh...my god. This guy is gonna be whipped for you.” Soyeon snorts and you heat up in embarrassment, wanting to deny her but unsure how to.

Because he’d already viewed and liked at least 5 of your images. And he’d even left a comment on the photo you’d taken before you left for the date last night, the angle and light perfect to make your make-up and outfit look its best.

jungsevenfold: beautiful! :)

[bluesfortheredj]

The only one.

Smut ahead.

You can feel the heat of Gwil’s intense stare on your back as you stand facing away from his end of the room, your fingers cradling your glass of wine delicately as you attempt to carry on your conversation with those that you stand with, and you hide a small shiver that runs up your spine by moving your weight from one leg to the other. Mutual friends had recently got engaged and you were at the celebration of their news in their three storey Victorian town house which was only a few streets away from where you both lived. The house was nicely full, thankfully not overflowing with people, and you could still hear the background music that was playing over the dull chatter that filled the ground floor.

“You did good Dan, you did really good. That ring almost blinded me when Sarah wiggled her fingers,” you chuckle.

“To be fair I was going for a bigger rock than that but she insisted on the smaller one for a more minimal look.”

“Well I’d love to see the big one if that’s the smaller of the two!”

You gasp lightly as Gwilym’s hand lands on your lower back and he appears at your side with a smile, “congratulations Dan!”

“Thanks Gwil, it’s about time right? I was just saying-”

“(Y/N)! Come on, come on, it’s our song, the band’s back together and we cannot let this moment slip by without our best dancer!” Lee grins as he interrupts Dan and grabs a hold of your hand to drag you into the middle of the long lounge.

“Lee!” you laugh, “oh no, it’s been years, I don’t even remember the moves!”

“You absolute liar!” he jokes as the other two girls get into position behind you both, “ready… go!”

The song begins to play from the beginning and the four of you muddle through old dance moves from many moons ago, eventually finding a stride about half way through, and when you look up a Gwil and his forced smile you know he’s pissed about Lee dragging you away like that. He has his arms folded with his visible fingers tapping along the fabric of his shirt impatiently and you notice his nostrils flare when Lee stands behind you and holds onto your hips as you swing them from side to side; the old dance move definitely not ageing well with a jealous other half watching you. There’s a mix of relief and regret when the song ends, and you make your way back over to where Gwilym stands with a silently outraged gaze.

“Worn yourself out now?” Dan teases.

“Yeah,” you laugh as you feel Gwilym’s hand travel up your back until his hand is holding on to the back of your neck.

“What did you think of her dance moves then Gwil?”

“Great,” he mutters through half gritted teeth, “we should get another drink.”

He steers you away from Dan with his hand still stretched out at the nape of your neck underneath your hair and you can tell by how stiff his body had gone that the green eyed monster has awakened inside him.

“Everything’s okay isn’t it Gwil?” you ask as you turn to face him and his hand falls.

“Why wouldn’t it be?”

“No reason,” you say, shaking your head from side to side as he pours out drinks for the both of you.

Your eyes travel up his rigid body from his navy blue loafers to the matching chinos, then finally to the smart white shirt he was wearing that hugged his broad chest so very well, and you smile as he hands you your drink. He had nothing to be jealous of, you could only ever have eyes for him and yet he would keep his eye on you like a predator watching its prey.

“I love you,” you remind him.

“Love you too.”

“Gwil! I need to steal (Y/N) because my little brother is here and he’s had a crush on her since he was this high,” Sarah holds her hand just above her hips, “I need to embarrass him but I promise to bring her back soon!”

Gwil forces a smile at Sarah but as she drags you away from him he follows you both into the next room and stands against the wall with his eyes peeking over his glass as he drinks. Again you can feel the heat on your back as his eyes bore into you, his presence not going unnoticed by either Sarah or her not-so-little brother, and he soon places his empty glass on a table before attaching himself to your side once more, this time his arm draped around your shoulders as he tugs you a little too hard into his side.

“Woah!” you chuckle as you lose your balance, almost spilling your drink.

“Sorry,” he says, running his hand up and down your upper arm.

You couldn’t even be annoyed at Gwil for his actions as in all honesty it made you feel safe and aroused all at the same time; his hands wanting to touch you at all times, his body pressed against yours comfortingly, and his eyes following you and only you across the room. You shiver at the thought and he looks down at you with a questioning frown, then you turn into him and stand on tiptoe so you can whisper in his ear.

“Shall we go home?”

He nods in response and you say goodbye to both Sarah and Dan before making your hasty exit through the front door into the warm summer evening breeze.

“You’re the only man for me, you know that right?” you say as you link your fingers between his while you walk home.

“Yeah, of course.”

“So what’s with the hint of jealousy then?”

“It’s not… I don’t… is it really a crime to not want another man touching my girlfriend so intimately? And as for Sarah’s brother… I remember him and his creepy little binoculars. I always hated it when you did that dance with Lee, I swear he used to do it on purpose to make me feel like this.”

“Make you feel like what?”

“Like he could snap his fingers and you’d be his.”

“He could never do that Gwil, because I’m head over heels for you. He’s just being an arse.”

“Hmm,” he hums.

The rest of the walk home is in silence but you keep your hand in his even as you get through the front door, and without saying a word you lead him straight upstairs to the bedroom. He stands completely still as you undress him quietly then you rid yourself of your own clothes and sit up on the bed with your legs open, your eyes fixed on his as your hand delicately glides over your body and down to your hidden folds. Gwil’s eyes widen as he watches your fingers spread your lips open then come together so that you can slide two of them inside you, and he moves to kneel on the bed in front of you as one of his hands wraps around his stirring member.

“Gwilym,” you moan lightly as you curl your fingers inside yourself while pumping them in and out of your warm, wet core, “oh, Gwil.”

He stares at you as your body lifts from the bed, your arousal evident by the sound your fingers were making as you pleasure yourself in front of him, your hips bucking up against your own hand as you slide your thumb along the inner fold to run across the sensitive nub that was desperate for attention, and as his name escapes your lips with every pant of breath his own hand works harder and faster on his erection.

“Give me your hand,” you instruct quickly, knowing you weren’t far off from the end.

He shuffles forward and extends his free hand to you then you remove your fingers and quickly replace them with two of his instead while you continue to circle your sweet spot, and you watch as white ribbons spurt up across his stomach and drip down onto his hand as he orgasms first. His fingers set a punishing pace as he delves them deep inside you over and over again while you lay in a sweaty, panting mess with his name falling haphazardly from your lips until you tense up and release everything with an almighty moan; his fingers being squeezed inside you as your walls clench tightly around them until you’ve ridden out the wave completely. His fingers are coated in the thick liquid when he removes them but he hastily puts them in his mouth to suck them clean before he crawls up to lay beside you with a very satisfied grin.

“What was that for?”

You place a hand on his cheek and kiss him deeply before answering, “that was to show you that you’re the only man for me.”

He bites his lip before wrapping his arms around your body and rolling onto his back so you were laying on his chest, “well you certainly showed me that!”

Could i request a jealous!Gwil piece? I picture him as the kind of frustrated, and not-so-subtle type of jealous guy but not overly annoying or infuriating, you know? Maybe some smut too, reader ensuring him he’s the only one for her and he’s got nothing to worry about

@painthatiusedto @winnielinleigh @queenslandlover-93 @excellentbecca @peachllobotomy @lovemarvelousfics @lovemelikeyou1997 @readinghorn @godohammers @timeandpixiedust @lv7867 @fuckyou-imspiderman @aynsleywalker @the-baby-bookworm @chlobo6 @drivenbybri

[mcfreakin-bxtch]

Langdon’s Got a Witch

Pairing: Michael Langdon x Reader

Warnings: Smut (not that heavy), language

Word Count: 4k

A/N: So I thought about making this two parts or more but if this gets enough hits and you guys ask I shall!

Langdon’s Got a Queen

Y/N Y/L/N’s mother had always told her to stay away from that woman. The woman in black, the one with evil written all over. She never really had a problem with Miriam Mead, but boy did her parents. Mommy and Daddy dearest, devoted lovers of God, casting away the devil with their prayers and high ground morals. Now Y/N never had a problem with that either; to each their own she’d say. Besides, who was she to really judge other beliefs? If they weren’t bothering her that is.

Now Y/N was a confident person all around, knew she’d be destined for something great. Not in the supernatural sense, but in one where she played an important part in her career of choice, men and women parting ways as she walked through; wearing proudly, as one could conceive as, a devil’s smirk. She had straight A’s and B’s in school (a senior now, relieved to be done and over with), kept out of trouble to the best of her ability (of course she smoked, drank, always went to the biggest party thrown). Y/N Y/L/N made her parents proud all around with the outside persona she showed them. But she also wasn’t convinced that anyone would remember her (well her family maybe, a few friends here and there who probably wouldn’t make an effort to attend her funeral), but she would own the shit out of her life that was for sure. Completely ordinary was she, or at least she thought until that boy moved in.

Michael fucking Langdon. Y/N remembered watching him from the window of her bedroom, which conveniently faced the street of their neighborhood. The first thing she noticed from afar was the curiosity in his eyes as he inspected the outside of his seemingly new home. Next was his beautiful blonde curls, which she imagined she could run her hands through. Miriam, or Miss Mead as she’d always say, was all over the boy. He seemed to enjoy it though, seemed to thrive off it. Y/N had to know where this boy (or man?) came from. And why the hell he was stuck with Miriam Mead, the outcast Satanist. She waited, not sure on why she did really; a part of her was always scared of him. She would sneak peaks of him through her window when she could, catch him on his porch after school. And each and every time it seemed as though he knew she was watching, would always look her way as if he sensed her; she got the strong feeling that he did. And this is when he started to scare her a little.

“I’m just running these to Christine,” she lied smoothly to her mother, who was mindlessly cutting her vegetables as she listened. “I’ll text you if anything changes.”

Her father was more lenient than her mother. Sometimes she thinks that he wasn’t so religion crazy until he met her mother. He says otherwise, preaches that that was how he was raised. She doubted it. But no matter what she couldn’t say she hated her parents, quite the opposite actually, but there were times where she highly disliked them; when they made her go to church for something she cared little for or didn’t even think believed in herself, and the constant, searching eyes of her (she also hated to admit this at times) beautiful mom. When she met Michael, she was curious as to who his real parents were and what they were like. She’d ask, but there was always malice in his tone when they were mentioned; the venom in it would slap Y/N every time she heard it.

“Okay honey,” her mom said. “Tell Christine I said hi!”

“I will!” Y/N called out as she walked out the door.

Christine was one of the few people Y/N actually liked from her school. She was a shy, quite girl with beautiful (at least Y/N thought so) brunette locks and chocolate colored eyes. Some kids didn’t understand why someone like Y/N would ever hang out with someone like Christine; the dorky, shy girl who had no business being at the parties Y/N would drag her to. But Y/N did not care. She felt as though Christine was the only person on Earth she could be herself with; all her secrets and fears were locked away with the pure heart of dear Christine. That is until Michael Langdon.

Confidence, yet fear of the unknown bounced away with every step Y/N took to her neighbors’ door. She could sense this uneasy surge coursing through her as soon as she stepped foot on the property, uncomfortable but not entirely. Something different and dark calling to her, and she strangely loved it. With her heart drumming in her chest she knocked politely on the door, waiting patiently for what she assumed would be Miss Mead. It was Michael instead.

“Hello,” Michael said.

It almost felt as if he heard her, felt the call in his veins just as she had. Hearing just one pure, normal everyday word coming from his lovely, melodic voice made Y/N weak in her knees. There was a part of her, the alert, behaved subconscious of hers telling her to run. To be done with the boy and never look back. But the stronger part, the one who invited danger and the unknown of tomorrows, fell in love with him immediately.

She was never one to be a sap, didn’t believe in ‘love at first sight’ bullshit. Love took time, commitment, understanding, and above all patience. Fairy tales were fairy tales, and, unfortunately, they were stuck in reality. But with Michael Y/N felt as if nothing else existed but them, their love. That feeling alone felt enough to kill her, and never did she ever think it would happen to her. That was also something Y/N loved about him; he always teared down everything she thought she knew and showed her greatness.

“Hi,” Y/N breathed, sounding as though she ran miles to get to his door. “I’m Y/N Y/L/N, the neighbor. I figured I should welcome you to the neighborhood with some cookies. They’re chocolate chip, freshly baked too.” She added with a smile.

Michael looked at her wearily, but soon smiled back. “Chocolate chip is my favorite.” He told her.

Y/N could’ve sighed in relief and thanked God right then and there. Over chocolate chip cookies.

“Great!” She exclaimed. “Well I could just give you these for you and Miss Mead to enjoy. You can keep the plate too, it’s honestly not a problem.”

Y/N honestly didn’t want to leave. Because if she did that meant she had to leave that beautiful scent Michael carried on him, miss his beautiful blue eyes that she’d kill for, that seemingly sweet, innocent smile. It would mean going back to her everyday normal life, where now she didn’t see much of a future for herself. His aura was dark but full of promises and deep desires that would draw anyone and anything in. It was sweet, sweet poison and she couldn’t get enough of it.

“You can come in,” Michael said before Y/N could turn around to walk back. “Miss Mead isn’t back from the store yet but I’m sure she won’t mind.”

Y/N could feel the heat of a blush rushing to her cheeks. For what reason she didn’t know. Maybe it was because Michael was the one who invited her in. Or maybe it was the fact that Miss Mead wasn’t home, and this would be the first time she’d ever see the inside of a Satanists home. Either way she couldn’t help the eager nodding of her head before Michael stepped to the side to let her in.

Miriam’s house was surprisingly homey for having so many Satanic articles around the house. The house was obviously kept nice and cleaned, no blood on the kitchen table from sacrifices, no crosses burning in any corner of the house. She expected something far worse and darker in comparison. She watched as Michael set the plate of cookies down on the kitchen counter, awkwardly twiddling his hands together as he thought of something to say; Y/N was selfishly happy that he was just as nervous as she was.

“So,” Michael started, clearly trying to seem confident, and Y/N found it hard to believe that such a gorgeous being had no such experience at all. “Wanna see my room? We can play a few games if you want, I got a PlayStation.”

Y/N found herself smiling and nodding before she could even process what she was agreeing to.

‘Keep it together Y/N’ she mentally scolded.

Michael didn’t talk much about his family that afternoon as they played video games. Y/N couldn’t help but notice how childish Michael seemed to act. Not in a bad way, but in a way as though he really was a child. It confused her, even made her a little uncomfortable at first but she learned to understand it. She was telling Michael all about herself and family (she noticed that he nodded as if he already knew everything about her, his eyes conveying an aged and senescent look that pushed and pulled at Y/N’s entire being) when Miss Mead came home. The first thing she noticed is how Michael looked a little scared, like he had just committed a crime.

“I’ll be back,” Michael told her, standing up and rushing out his bedroom before Y/N could utter a response.

She folded her hands in her lap, looking around his room some more. It was simple for a teenage boy, some posters on the wall, a nice bed set, tv, clothes scattered in various parts of the room. She could hear them talking downstairs, picking up scattered words from their muffled conversation. A few minutes later Michael came back up, leaning against his doorway with a small, eager smile.

“Miss Mead brought home some takeout, wanna join us?”

Her heart stuttered at this. She was already having dinner with his family! Well adoptive (?) mother, but still. There were so many ways one could take it as, but she would never admit at the time that she wasn’t ready to leave him yet. She was willing to walk through fire if it meant spending another moment with Michael, and it scared her to death at how fast these feelings were catching on; like he was a magnet and she was ensnared in his trap.

“Thank you for the cookies Y/N,” Miriam said as they ate at the dinner table. “You certainly are the baker!”

“Thank you, Miss Mead,” Y/N said politely.

“Miriam, please,” she corrected, then straightened up a little in her seat.

“Do your parents know you’re over here?”

Y/N frowned, hoping that this conversation wouldn’t come up. “Not exactly,” she figured it was best not to lie to her, and hell she wasn’t afraid to admit that she was still a little scared of the woman. “But I’ll be alright. I just wanted to say hi, see if he needed help with school and everything.”

That also wasn’t entirely a lie, she had had school on her plans for discussing, a way to cave her way deeper into the boy only for him to turn the tables around on her.

“Huh,” Miss Mead huffed. “Well that was very kind of you Y/N. But Michael doesn’t need your help honey.”

Y/N was taken back, not quite expecting her brutal honesty. Michael looked at Miriam, horrified and embarrassed. Before Y/N could argue or agree, she wasn’t sure what, Michael said,

“Well I like her company and I want her to stay.”

There was a moment where Y/N looked at him and swore she saw the promise of a threat in his eyes as he stared at Miriam; fire burning behind the promise, endless torture and pain. This should’ve scared her, like run out of the fucking house and never, ever look back or even utter his name scared. Instead, her heart melted a little at the weight of his words and the fact that Miriam caved so easily. She went back home with more uncertainty than she ever felt before, but it also felt misplaced; like it wasn’t completely brought on by Michael. Rather, it was an immense pressure coursing through her body, and it felt as though it was seeping into her brain as well. She managed to somehow bypass her parents with a simple greeting and informing that she was heading to bed and passed out as soon as her head hit the pillows.

The dream Y/N was experiencing was one most would heavily consider to be a nightmare. And one that was visibly too real. There were barrens and she was still in her tank top and shorts she slipped in before falling asleep. She was standing in what she realized used to be Earth. Well, it was still on Earth, but everything alive was dead, nothing but dust and ash in the poisoned, polluted air. It did bother her, seeing all gray, no colors of life. It filled her with dread, and she did think about her parents and Christine.

“Y/N.”

She spun towards the sound, seeing, in the distance, a figure in a dark cloak. Somehow, she got the feeling that this figure was safe; to her at least. She found herself walking towards him, only realizing she was doing so when she stood a few feet in front of him. Under the hood of his cloak was a pale face, smiling down at her and holding his hand out. It was not the face of the boy she had just met, but rather an ancient evil; she knew that he had caused this. Still, she placed her palm in his. Waking up abruptly from the dream with a gasp, she faintly smelled the smoke before seeing it. There, in the corner of her room near the window where she would watch Michael from, was a fire. A fucking huge fire. Immediately jumping out of her bed and to her parents’ room made her dizzy from the smoke, but she damn near almost fainted from the screams that tore from her.

Miriam was talking with the police as Michael sat with Y/N in the ambulance. Her house was still burning down, her parents burnt to a crisp into their beds, the firefighters working hard to control it. She sat with a blanket around her shoulders as she was being checked out, dazed and in shock. She thought Michael was trying to talk to her, to soother her out of her shock, but the words came in jumbled messes, sounding as though she was underwater. She knew that she had somehow caused it. But what made her feel really guilty, that made her realize just how deep into hell she was already in, was that she felt so much better. The pressure was gone, as though it disappeared into the fire, and she felt oddly happy and free.

Michael had told Miriam that she was to stay with them until otherwise. Y/N didn’t have a problem with it, brought her closer to him. Miriam only tolerated it because of Michael. Christine would try to visit, her phone always blowing up from her constant calls and texts, but Y/N didn’t want them anymore; she didn’t want to bring Christine down with her.

Michael and Y/N’s relationship continued to change every day. The first few weeks were a daze, and she noticed things moving without her touching them, the pressure coming back every now and then. She would beg Michael to help her with this, afraid of repeating the same fate she left her parents in. Their faces haunted her in her dreams until Michael made them better. It was soon after that he told her everything about who he was. It surprisingly didn’t shock her as much as it should have. Miriam grew to like her and almost worship her as much as she did Michael when they all came to the conclusion that she had magic (almost) like Michael. Y/N and Michael would work on them together, her becoming more powerful with her newfound abilities. It felt amazing, letting it all out, and she wished she knew about them before accidentally killing her parents. Michael convinced her it was for the best. And he could be quite convincing; it only took a week into their new training before Y/N made the first move, kissing Michael with some much passion that she thought was going to cause another fire. She could tell he was inexperienced and very scared and nervous about her reaction to this revelation; it only made her more careful with him until he no longer needed her guidance.

The day Cordelia Foxx showed up at her door was also the day Michael was arrested for killing the butcher at the grocery store and was taken in by the Warlocks. Cordelia explained to her who exactly she was and that she was indeed a witch, and an already powerful one. She took her in, New Orleans being a place Y/N never expected to visit, and made quick friends; somehow, she knew not to worry, Michael was okay and she’d see him again.

Y/N passed through with flying colors, discovering so much more about herself and witches and magic. She was happy there, could see herself standing among the witches. She was closest to Mallory most of all, whom she sensed such a deep connection to that she couldn’t explain. But there was always that pull; there was always Michael. Every night away from him she could feel him, could practically taste him with every breath she took. Her dreams -she wasn’t sure what to call them anymore- were filled with soft caresses and words spoken of their adventures away from each other.

“Witches and Warlocks, huh?” Y/N joked the first night. “Who would’ve thought they were actually a thing.”

They were sitting in his room, or at least a version of it they created, on his bed, Michael propped up on one elbow as he looked up at her. She could sense the major changes in him as he could with her, but she knew his was darker and more terrifying; she still couldn’t find herself to break from his spell.

Michael couldn’t but chuckle with her, trailing a finger over her knee, sending shivers down her spine.

“They’re saying I could be the next Supreme,” Michael said. “The first Warlock one at that.”

Y/N knew what this meant, and it did bother her a little at first. Cordelia was a good person and her mentor, and she was also very kind to her. Sometimes she reminded her of her mother with the way she would dot over her, give her womanly wisdoms; it came with a comforting feeling.

Michael and Y/N had decided to hide their relationship from the Warlocks and Witches when Y/N learned they were to come to the Warlocks themselves to prove if Michael was worthy to take his rightful place. They would steal looks here and there under careful supervision, a brush of fingers as they walked by each other in the hallways. It seemed as though their plan was working, as no one questioned them at all. It also gave a little thrill to their trice’s, when Michael would sneak to her room to fuck her silly (thankfully her roommate was a very heavy sleeper), or when he would lick her pussy like his life depended on it in the library. She never felt guilty afterwards and wondered if Michael’s influence was finally in her system; no traces of the old Y/N Y/L/N left, but rather something more beautiful and powerful than before.

“She’s scared,” Michael said the night before his trial. They were lying in her bed, her roommate gone for reasons Y/N didn’t care about; she was just happy she wasn’t there. “She knows I’m going to pass.”

Y/N hummed as she ran her fingers through his luscious locks, his head resting over her heart.

“She is,” she agreed. “Cordelia isn’t stupid though, Michael. You should be careful.”

Michael lifted his head up to get a good look at her, a twinkle in his eyes. “Sure, sure,” he said. “But I’m worried about your apparent lack of faith in me Y/N/N.”

Most people would scurry away from the look in his eyes and the tone of his voice, so full of authority. But Y/N was destined to be with Michael no matter what, and he would never hurt her intentionally. He did, however, depend on her love and loyalty to him, fed off it; she couldn’t blame him given his track record.

“I have plenty of faith in you, baby,” she cooed. “It’s just, I worry sometimes.”

He smiled, that soft, adorable smile that was reserved for her and her eyes only. He placed a chaste but oh so sweet kiss to her lips, Y/N whimpering when he pulled away too soon. He cupped her cheek, now laying on top of her.

“Nothing, and I do mean nothing, will ever take me away from you.” The conviction in his promise made her heart stop, blood rush to her cheeks, her breaths shallow. All that and his hand traveling down the curves of her body, lifting her left leg so he could put his weight between her legs; she could feel his want for her already, a pool of arousal between her legs because of it.

They quickly shed their clothes, stealing sloppy, needy kisses in between. Michael knew her body well now, could play her like a fine instrument and she would let out all the beautiful notes he thrived off of.

“We,” he breathed out, placing the head of his large cock at her entrance, teasing her clit as he did so. Y/N moaned, rolling his hips to get him inside before he pinned her hip down.

“Are meant for each other.” He finished this sentence with a hard thrust, making Y/N cry out. He didn’t give her any time to adjust, starting a brutal yet somehow soft, loving pace as she babbled, already so close to internal euphoria.

“We were destined for such great things together,” he boasted, one arm on the headboard as it was beginning to bang against the wall, the other touching her everywhere. She never wanted him to stop talking, each time his lovely voice bringing her close to release.

“This world will be ours. By our delights and creations, we are the beings of God and the Devil. They can do nothing to stop us. They can do nothing to separate us. We will create a new world in our making, a better one, atop the ashes of the spoiled.”

God Y/N loved him. She felt every word through every thrust into her wet cunt, through every touch, every breath she took in from him, from their bruising kisses. She knew every word he was saying was completely and utterly true. She felt the power coursing through them, and she truly believed that it was enough to burn the whole entire fucking world down as they were fucking.

“I love you!” Y/N practically screamed, clutching to him as he rubbed her clit with a rough thumb.

“I love you,” Michael breathed, nearing his release as well and pounding into her harder and faster.

She couldn’t hold it back any longer, letting out pornographic moans into his chest as her pussy tightened around his thick length. He growled as he felt her velvet walls clutch him, releasing deep inside her a few thrusts later. He collapsed on top of her, her arms wrapped around him as he did. She thought over what he said as they caught their breaths. She couldn’t find any fear in her at them.

Michael lifted his head up and placed a loving kiss to her lips, nipping at her bottom lip before pulling back.

“You are mine.”

Y/N nodded, grinning from ear to ear. “And you are mine.”

[brown-bi-beautiful]

Supernatural Series Rewrite

Supernatural Rewrites Masterlist

Dean Winchester x named reader

Series Warning: language violence, angst, fluff, sexual content, Gore, molestation, mention of sexual harassment, usual supernatural violence. (If you’re triggered by any of these then please don’t read)

(A/n- I had to give the reader a name, there’s reason behind it but you can change it if you want. I changed some of the plot and some of the scenes but mostly it’s the same. I do not own the supernatural series but there are some things that are completely my imagination, it has nothing to do with the actual mythology or the series)

Bloody Mary (part 3)

Season One. Episode Six.

Skin (Part 1)

Dean pulled up to an crappy gas station and turned off the engine. "Alright, I figured we'd hit Tucumcari by lunch. Then head south, hit Bisbee by midnight." He started telling the plan for the week now that you guys don't have any case. "Sam wears woman's underwear." Dean continues when he noticed that Sam wasn't paying attention, this made you chuckle.

"I've been listening, I'm just busy." Sam replied while doing something on his palm pilot.

"Busy doing what?" Dean asked as he got out of the car and you did the same to stretch your legs out. You've been sitting in that back seat for an awful long time. "Reading emails." Sam replied. "emails from who?" Dean asked as he walked around the car to the other side. "from my friends at Stanford." he said and you rolled your eyes. Of course he had friends in Stanford other than Jessica, he wasn't a freak like you.

"You kidding? You still keep in touch with your college buddies?" Dean scoffed and started filling gas in the car.

"why not?" Sam asked.

"Well..... What exactly do you tell 'em? You know, about where you've been, what you been doing?" He asked leaning against the car beside you and looking at Sam through the window.

"I tell 'em I'm on a road trip with my big brother and Alex. I tell 'em I needed some time off after Jess."

"well, so you lie to them." Dean commented.

"No. I just don't tell them everything."

"yeah. Th-that's called lying, Sam." you chipped in. "Hey, I get it. Telling them the truth is far worse." said Dean.

"So what am I supposed to do? Just cut everybody out of my life?" Sam asked and Dean shrugged. "you're serious?"

"Look, it sucks. But a job like this, you can't get close to people, period." Dean said.

"you're kind of antisocial. You know that?"

"Dean's kinda right, Sam. I mean, look at me, I don't talk to anyone from college." you said.

"That's because you didn't have any friends in college beside Jessica." he said making you gasp slightly.

"That's so not true. I had friends." you made a weak attempt at defending yourself.

"oh really, name one of your 'friends'." he said giving you a challenging look. You looked at Dean who was looking at you with an raised eyebrow.

"There was..... Umm... There was that guy, in the Halloween party. Oh and there was Toby."

"what? Toby wasn't your friend, you broke his face." he scoffed.

"ya, because I considered him a really close friend."

"oh yeah?...what was his full name?"

"ummm.... Maguire?" you asked making both of them laugh. "yeah whatever. I didn't have any friends. You were the cool guy." you said crossing your arms over your chest and rolling your eyes.

Dean wrapped his one arm around you when he saw Sam wasn't noticing. "Don't listen to him, you're awesome and anyone would die to have a friend like you." He whispered making you chuckle. "I know." you whispered back. You grabbed his collar and pulled him down for a kiss but before his lips could meet yours you heard Sam gasp "God."

"what?" Dean asked leaning down to his window you rolled your eyes and muttered "Cockblocker."

You have no idea what you and Dean actually are, but you guys have been doing weird couply things for a week now, like holding hands under the table, sneaking kisses when Sam doesn't look, But you haven't gone farther than those kisses. Everytime you guys try to make out something interrupts, and that 'something' is mostly the younger Winchester.

"uh, this email from this girl, Rebecca, one of those friends of mine." Sam said.

"is she hot?" Dean asked and you hit him from the behind.

"I went to school with her and her brother Zach. She says Zach's been charged with murder. He's been arrested for killing his girlfriend. Rebecca says he didn't do it. But sounds like the cops have a pretty good case." Sam explained and you leaned down beside Dean to listen closely.

"Dude, what kind of people are you hanging out with? "

"No, man. I know Zach. He's no killer."

"Well, maybe you know Zach as well as he knows you." you said standing up straight.

"They're in St. Louis. We're going." Sam said making your eyes wide a little.

"Look, I'm sorry about your buddy but this does not sound like our kind of problem." Dean said with a slight chuckle.

"it is our problem. They're my friends." Sam argued.

"St. Louis is 400 miles behind us, Sam." Dean said.

"He's right, Dean. We could at least check it out." you said and he turned around with a raised eyebrow. "come on. I would hate it if there's any chance that we can help and we don't." you said giving him the puppy eyes. He sighed and said "Fine, get in." before getting in the driver seat and slamming the door.

Dean turned the so fast that you almost fell off the back seat. "Jeez." you said. Six hours of ride and Dean kept glaring at you through the rear view mirror.

Dean finally pulled up in front of the address. It was a nice little house. You guys walked up to the front porch and Sam knocked on the door. A blond girl opened up and you squinted your eyes trying to remember her.

She looked a little enthusiastic when she saw Sam. "oh my god, Sam."

"well, if it isn't little Becky." Sam said. You looked up at Dean and saw he couldn't take his eyes off of 'little Becky.'

"you know what you can do with that 'little Becky' crap." She said and pulled Sam in for a hug. Although as soon as her eyes fell on you her smile faded, turning into a fake one clearly filled with disgust.

"Alex. You're here too." She said pulling away from Sam.

"yeah. And you know me." you gave her a even faker smile than hers.

"oh we met at the fresher's party. Remember?" She said and you faked remembering it.

"oh yeah, I do." you quickly turned to Dean and mouthed "I don't." It was getting a little awkward between the two of you so Sam spoke up. "I got your email."

"I didn't think that you would come here."

"Dean, older brother." Dean said introducing himself. "Hi." She said.

"we are here to help. Whatever we can do." Sam said. "come in." She stepped aside and letting you guys in.

"Nice place." Dean commented as you guys got further inside.

"It's my parent's. I was just crashing here for the weekend when everything happened. I decided to take the semester off. I'm gonna stay until Zach's free. She said as she led you guys inside.

"where are your folks? " Sam asked.

"They live in Paris for half the year. So they are on their way home now for the trial." She said as you guys stopped at the living area.

"You guys want a beer?" before anyone could say anything she said again. "oh, sorry. I forgot you're under aged." She said looking at you. "I still have no idea how you got into Stanford." she clearly hated you and you had no idea why. "No we're fine." Sam chipped in once more to save everyone from the awkwardness. "so tell us what happened?"

"well, um, Zach, he came home and he found Emily tied to a chair. And she was beaten up and bloody and she wasn't breathing and so he- he called 911. And the police, they showed up and arrested him. But the thing is the only way that Zach could have killed Emily is if he was in two places at the same time. The police they have a video. Its from the security tape from across the street. And it shows Zach coming home at 10:30. Now, Emily was killed just after that. But I swear, he was here with me having a few beers at least after mid night." Rebecca explained the whole situation to the three of you.

"You know, maybe we could see the crime scene, Zach's house." Sam said. "we could?" you asked raising an eyebrow.

"Why? I mean what could you do?" Rebecca asked Sam.

"well, me, not so much but Dean's a cop." Sam said making you chuckle slightly.

"A detective actually." Dean corrected, obviously trying to impress the blonde.

"Really? Where?" She asked.

"Bisbee, Arizona. But I'm off duty now." Dean said.

"you guys, it's so nice to offer, but I just, I don't know." Rebecca said looking unsure about the whole situation.

"Beck, look. I know Zach didn't do this. Now we have to find a way to prove that he's innocent." Sam said softly trying to convince her.

"okay, I'm gonna go get the key." Rebecca said walking away to get the keys.

Dean walked around Sam to where Rebecca was standing before, whistling. "oh, yeah man. You're a real straight shooter with your friends." Dean said making you roll your eyes. If you didn't hate her enough, you sure do now.

"Look Zach and Becky need our help-" Sam started but Dean cut him off.

"I just don't think this is our kind of problem." Dean said.

"No I think it is. I mean the guy was 2 places at once? We've looked into less." you said, finally making the older Winchester see the point.

Dean stopped the car in front of Zach's house. "you're sure this is okay?" Rebecca asked as the four of you got out of the car. "ya, I'm an officer of the law." Dean said as you ducked under the yellow tape and got inside Zach's house followed by Sam. "Beck, you wanna wait outside?" Sam asked when he saw Rebecca hesitating to come in. "No, I wanna help." She said and got inside as well. There was blood splattered everywhere. You saw a picture frame of Zach And who you assume, his girlfriend.

"Tell us what else the police said." you questioned forgetting for a second that she hates your guts for some reason.

"Well, that there was no sign of a break in. They say that Emily let her attacker in. And the lawyers, they're already talking about a plea bargain." She said, maybe also forgetting that she hated you. Rebecca Started sobbing again as she looked around at all the blood and you felt bad for her. "look, Beck... If Zach didn't do this it means someone else did. Any idea who? " Sam asked and she shook her head but then she seemed to o remember something. "um there was something. About a week before, someone broke in here. They stole some clothes, zach's clothes. And the police they don't think it's anything. We were not that far from downtown. I mean sometimes people just get robbed." Rebecca said as you looked around the house for any sort of evidence.

A dog started barking and it became louder as Dean opened the door and looked out through the crack. You walked over to look over his shoulder. His barking became louder as he saw you guys. "You know that used to be the sweetest dog." Rebecca said coming up to you and Dean. "What happened?" He asked. "He just changed."

"You remember when he changed?" you asked.

“I guess around the time of the murder." She answered and you rolled your eyes, as if it wasn't enough weird already. You turn and walked over to Sam who was looking at a picture of him with Rebecca and Zach over the fridge.

"So the neighbour's dog went psycho right around the time Zach's girlfriend was killed." You said informing the younger Winchester about the new information you learnt.

"Animals can have a sharp sense of paranormal." Sam replied.

"Yes, maybe Fido saw something." Dean said as he walked over to where you and his younger brother were having an conversation. You turned with the small smirk and asked, "So you think maybe this is our kind of problem?"

"Nah, Probably not, but we should look at the security tape to make sure." He replied and you and Sam shared a look. "yeah." Sam agreed with a slight smirk That matched yours.

Dean turned to talk to Rebecca as she started her way toward you three." So the tape, the, uh, security footage? Think your lawyers could get their hands on it? I don't have that kind of jurisdiction."

"I've already got it." She said and you raised an eyebrow. I didn't wanna say anything in front of the cop. I um, I stole it off the lawyer's desk. I just had to see it for myself." She added and you have to say it impressed you a little.

"Alright." Dean said and gestured for her to lead the way. You stared at the picture of Rebecca and Zach with Sam for a few seconds before following the boys out of the house.

"Here he comes." She said as all of you sat in her living room looking at the security footage that was mentioned before. Dean was sitting next to Rebecca on the sofa and you were standing next to Sam.

"22:04, that's just after 10:00. You said time of death was about 10:30." said Dean, looking at the blonde sitting beside him.

"our lawyers hired some kind of video expert. He says the tapes authentic. It wasn't tampered with." Rebecca said as you watched the tape closely. You saw as Zach, or at least who was supposed to be Zach walked around and as soon as he looked at the camera you saw a weird glow in his eyes, just for a split second. You looked at Sam to realize he noticed it too because he gave you the look that you were about to give him.

"Hey, Beck, Can we take those beers now?" Sam said turning toward the blond. "oh sure." she said walking towards kitchen. “Hey, uh, maybe sandwiches too." Sam added when he realised this might take a little more time to discuss. She laughed and said "what do you think this is, Hooters?"

Dean laughed at the terrible joke and mumbled "I wish." which made you roll your eyes. "What is it?" He asked and walked over to you and Sam.

"Check this out." Sam said rewinding the tape and then playing it on slow motion to show Dean.

"Maybe it's just a camera flare." Dean said

"That's not like any camera flare I've ever seen. You know a lot of cultures believe a photograph can catch a glimpse of soul. Remember that dog that was freaking out? Maybe he saw this thing maybe, this is some kind of dark double of Zach's something that looks like him but isn't him?" You explained your theory to the boys but more to Dean.

"Like a doppelganger?" He asked.

"yeah. That'd sure explain how he was two places at once." Sam said and with that Rebecca walked out balancing three sandwiches and two beers in both of her hands. "I didn't know if I should give you a beer in front of a cop." She said looking at you and then at Dean.

"it's ok. I wasn't really in the mood either." you said taking a bite out of the sandwich she handed you.

Dean pulled infront of a Motel and you guys walked towards the front desk. You started hoping that you guys wouldn't find two different rooms so you could get an excuse to share a bed with Dean but when the hell was your luck ever on your side, of course, there are two different rooms available.

You could always just ask him to sneak into your room But you definitely weren't going to admit it out loud to him that you wanted to share bed with him, That will only boost his ego. So without any complain you grabbed your duffel bag and took the key from Sam and made your way to room number 11. It was one in the farthest corner And you noticed there were three more rooms between yours and the boy's which made you scowl even more.

You got inside the room and locked it behind you. You quickly freshen up and changed into something comfortable, a shirt of Sam you stole a while ago and pyjama pants. Normally you would do some research instead of going to bed but today you just weren't in the mood so you got inside the sheets of the motel bed which smelled like some really rough detergent.

You didn't dare closing your eyes, already knowing what was coming for you in your dreams so you just lied there awake staring at the ceiling. After what felt like an hour but a few minutes at the same time you heard a series of soft knocking on the door of your motel room.

You huffed and got up from your bed annoyed that someone would dare to disturb you at this time. "What?" you yelled you open the door, but regretted it as soon as you a pair of green eyes staring at you innocently and not just any pair of eyes, your favourite ones.

"I'm sorry, is this a bad time?" He asked not wanting to invade your privacy.

"No, No, it's fine, get in." You quickly poked your head out and looked around to see if Sam was somewhere in sight. "so?" You said turning to look at Dean who was now standing in front of your bed.

"I was really hoping we could share a bed tonight." He confessed making a smile.

"Really? Me too." You finally admitted knowing there was no point of hiding it now.

"Then maybe we could share a bed tonight." He suggested with a shrug.

"wouldn't Sam be suspicious?" you asked taking a step closer.

"No, He'll think I'm hooking up with some girl." He said.

"Well, aren't you?" You asked taking your final step and standing right in front of him.

"Nope, you are not just 'some girl'." He answered wrapping his arms around your waist pulling you even more closer. Not just physically, the more you stared at those Apple green eyes the more you found Your soul being pulled to him and as cliche as it sounds you are practically lost in him.

That's when you realised your lips were almost touching. You made the final move pushing yourself on your tippy toes pressing your lips to his. He started kissing back immediately like he was waiting for you to do this the entire day. You both fell back on the bed the kiss not breaking even for a second.

You don't even know when you guys fell asleep in each other's arms. But what you do know is not even a single Nightmare there to come home to that night.

*******

Part 2

Taglist:

@rach5ive @paintballkid711 @chubby-dumplin @hobby27 @colie87 @iilooveereadiingfiics @spnchick1996 @greenarrowhead @for-a-brothers-love @deanw-is-pretty @puppies-make-me-extra-happy @eternaleviee @slytherinrising

[fanficsrusz]

My collection - part three John wick AU

A/n: ahhh the calm before the storm. *evil laugh* im also going to start work on a masterlist soon 👍

Masterlist

________________________________________The downpour had stopped but y/n could still smell the rain in the air as she made her way out of the house and towards college. As she walked down the driveway where her car should be, she pulled out her phone and began to make the calls needed in order to get her car fixed.

Finishing the call quickly, she finally looked up and across the street. Johns car was not in the driveway and y/n relaxed her shoulders as chances of seeing him in the early morning reduced. She didn't care where he was and had no intention of finding out and so began the walk towards college taking in the scenery around her, letting all her stress melt away.

Arriving at college she saw the mechanic at her car already at work and jogged over to him. He was an elderly gentlemen but he had a soft face, a face that held wisdom and stories of his past experiences. He reminded her of her father. "hi. Hows shes doing" y/n beamed referring to the car. The mechanic stood up and gave her a puzzled look. "miss have you been playing with the car?" the man gave her a concerned look and y/n was confused. "what? No? Why would i play with it?" she asked peering over his shoulder to look at the cars inside. The mechanic looked back to the car before replying "well you see these wires have been pulled out quite forcefully. This was no accident and honestly ive only ever seen this one other time and that was at a crime scene" the mechanic half joked and y/n looked at the wires in his hand and just stood there as her thoughts raced "can you fix it?" y/n asked "miss i can fix just about anything" the guy chuckled but was met with silence. "good. I'm going to be in there so just call when you're done" she pointed to the building "will do" the old man said resuming his work once again.

Making her way into the school she walked into the reception office, she approached the young lady sitting at the desk. "hi. My name is y/n and i was just wondering if you have CCTV in the car park? You see my car was vandalised yesterday and i just want to see if they were caught on camera" the girl looked up at y/n and smiled kindly. "sure. I'll just get the security guard for you" and with that the girl left the room before returning moments later with a tall man who looked like he could work for the mafia with how big his muscles were. "follow me" the security guard said and led her into a small room at the back before sitting down at various monitors. He began to press random buttons before he stopped. The screen played back the scenes of yesterday and y/n watched herself pull into the carpark and get out. The sense of deja vu hit hard. The video continued playing as he slowly fast forwarded showing various people walking about but that's when the screen went black. "what happened?" y/n asked "I don't know" the guard began to click around the screen "its as if someone has deleted the footage" he stopped "i'm sorry i can't help you". Y/n sighed and grabbed her head "it's fine thank you for trying" and began to walk out. 'What the hell was going on?' y/n thought as she walked slowly down the hall towards the library.

Sitting down at one of the desks y/n rummaged through her bag to find her planner but couldn't find it she stopped rummaging through her bag, trying to remember where she had left it. "i believe you are looking for this" the voice said quietly and the book was held in front of her. Y/n looked up and there stood Dr. Wick im one of his various suits, a smirk tugging at his lips. Y/n had begun to hate his face and how he always seemed to know where she was and what she was doing but she couldn't bring herself to be rude. "thank you" y/n muttered before attempting to grab the book from his hand before it was suddenly pulled away. "you know you should really take better care of your things. Who knows what could happen to the things you love or whose hands they could fall into." there was a sinister undertone to his voice which y/n picked up. It was as if he was talking about something else. "Joh…. Dr Wick can i please have my planner back i've got work to do" john turned around and stood in front of her "of course you can my dear" and john handed her the book, the word 'dear' lingering in y/ns ears a little to long making her feel queasy.

As y/n took the book from him, she accidentally grazed his hand with hers and john's eyes went wide as if she had just told him the best news in the world. John walked out the library without another word. 'what the hell is up with that guy' y/n pondered on the though trying to decode his words and actions before her attention was pulled to a group of guys walking into the library. She recognised them, they were tom's friends. She waited as the group sat down but there was no tom. She slowly stood up to make her way towards them to find out where tom was but stopped when a thought entered her head 'you know what, no. He obviously doesn't care or he wouldn't of left' and with that y/n sat down and began working on various assignments.

The school day ended with not much else happening apart from the most uncomfortable lesson with Dr. Wick which was spent with him staring at y/n at every opportunity he had. It was as if he was taking in every detail of the girl. Y/n shuddered at the thought of John's eyes on her every movement as she made her way over to her car. There was a little note on the windscreen. 'your car is fixed. Please come in store or pay online.' y/n smiled and put the note in her pocket before driving home making a mental note about making sure to pay later on.

Pulling into the driveway she noticed that John's car was still not there. She began to gather her things from the seat next to her but her planner caught her attention. On the back of the book was a small red stain. She brought it closer to her face for inspection. Was it juice? Or…… "omg" y/n breathed out. Blood. A sudden knocking at the car window caused y/n to jump and hit her head on the roof. She looked over as she held her head and saw an old man stood there. She climbed out of the car. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to startle you," he said, "no it's fine" y/n replied rubbing the spot she hit, a nice bruise forming "can I help you?" she replied standing up straight. "yes. My name is lucas im the landlord. My grandson tom said he was coming here last night but he never returned and he didn't show up for school. Have you seen him" the man was obviously panicking. y/n felt guilt shoot through her as she began to tell him the events of last night. " yhh tom came here and we watched a movie together before falling asleep but he was gone when I woke up. I assumed he went home". The man looked down as he breathed heavily. "ok thank you. Im going to have to report him missing." and just like that the man walked off down the street.

Y/n began to worry as she stood there. What could have happened to him? Where could he have gone?. The roar of the familiar mustang broke her train of thought and john pulled into the driveway before getting out. He had dirt and bruises all over his face and was walking with a limp. It looked like he had gone 50 rounds with a boxer. As john caught her gaze he faced her completely and waved. Y/n ignored him and ran inside the house making sure to lock the door behind her. She looked through the spy whole and saw him stand there for a few seconds before making his way inside. She sighed a sign if relieve. She did not want to talk to him if she could avoid it. The weird vibe he emitted only got stronger with each passing moment and it was as if she was the only one who noticed the mans odd behaviour.

Y/n shook her head before beginning to go about her nightly routine.

A few hours later the sky was dark and y/n was sat in front of the TV with a bowl of pasta in hand ready to drown herself in friday night tv. She changed the channel to the news and was greeted with a picture of toms face. She put the bowl down next to her and proceeded to turn the volume up as the news presenter continued her story.

"....... Local student Tom Bishop has been reported missing after failing to return home after visiting a friend……" that last bit made y/n feel so guilty and she held her face in her hands. ".... This report comes after 4 young women went missing less that 20 miles away." y/n looked up at the 4 pictures displayed on the screen. Each of them looked similar in appearance and similar to y/n but she didn't really take much notice of the pictures, only focusing on the fact that Tom was missing and she couldn't help but feel responsible. "... It is not yet known if the cases are linked, however, Police are warning people to lock doors and windows and be careful. If you have any information about any of the people shown tonight, please contact the police. The weather for this…..". Y/n turnt the tv off and stood up just as she heard a noise come from across the street and there stood john pulling random things out of his trunk. Y/n moved closer to the window to get a better look. Her eyes went wide. The jacket tom was wearing when they first met was in his hands. Y/n moved back slightly as john turned around and he saw her. She was sure he had a dark red stain down his normally pristine shirt. He smirked and Y/n quickly pulled the curtains closed in an attempt to look as if she saw nothing.

Closing her eyes she tried to clear her mind. "im being stupid. Why would he have toms jacket?" y/n opened her eyes again looking at the clock in the room. It clocks hand showed 11pm. Y/n had been awake for so long. "im just seeing things. Im just tired. " y/n laughed at the attempts to put a logic explanation to what she saw "yepp just seeing things". Y/n made her way up to her room and got into bed. As she laid down her brain wouldn't let her sleep. Eventhough y/n had tried to convince herself otherwise she knew what she saw and what she had to do.  With that thought she leant over and grabbed her phone. She began to dial 911 and went to press the call button but stopped. Did she really want to do this? What if the man was innocent? "no" she said "if the man is innocent, the police will find nothing." she said before pressing the call button.

"911 whats your emergency" the operator said

"hi i think i have some information about the Tom Bishop case."

"please hold" and with that y/n was transferred to a detective on the case and began to describe what she saw that night. "ok thank you miss. May I have your name?" the detective said. "um can I keep this as an anonymous tip?" she asked twiddling with her blanket as a way to comfort herself. "sure" the detective said a smile evident on his face "thank you for your help" and he hung up.

Y/n sighed and laid back down closing her eyes.

She didn't know how or why but John Wick had something to do with Toms disappearance.

Tbc

_________________________________________

A/n: so part three is over and im excite to see what you all think of this chapter because the shit is about to hit the fan.

Tag list :

@homesoutofhuman

@softwhispers

@lushboy148

@dorinasfavs

[crowsent]

did a text post bc the formatting is easier. also because so i won’t bombard you ( @yalltookmyurlideas ) with words

i basically created my son ethel when i was late middle school. almost summer. i was watching this one anime, servamp, and there was a character with a really interesting design of blonde hair with black streaks (his name was hyde) so my middleschool self i went “neat! i want an oc like that!” so i designed ethel based on that one anime character with weird hair. and that was his only defining trait for a while: weird hair

originally, ethel had white hair and genetically inherited black streaks (again bc i was in middleschool) and i created the first drawing of ethel (first pic i sent) when i was a freshman in highschool and the whiteness of the rest of his hair compared to the streaks is very visible.

at that point, my backstory for him was essentially “pale, loner, likes shakespeare, wears hoodie, highschooler” his shirt is just a really creepy smiley face bc i really wanted to turn up the emoness of his design. pretty sure he had a girlfriend or a partner whose name was like. carmen. or camillia. or something that starts with a c. she dies and serves as fuel for him to be angsty bc again. middle school

then i became a junior and looked at his initial design and went. “what if i make it darker?” bc i hit peak emo phase when i was a highschool freshman and was one step away from wearing mcr outfits every day to school. you know the one. that one jacket.

2nd and 3rd pictures i sent were the darker and gritter versions of ethel. hence the darker hair (you can barely see the dark streaks in the third photo) and edginess amped up to 11. his hair was like a chestnut brown at that point and the black streaks were less visible. he remained without a background for the most part but i added “girlfriend was killed, wants revenge” to his bio because i guess i wanted him to be even edgier? and he kind of becomes a hermit who hates society at the end of his character arc. just a grumpy nihilist with depression bc at the time i did not know how to handle my own mental health and it manifested as that.

i didn’t fully create a backstory for ethel until i reached my senior year. then i went fucking ham and changed his entire character. he went from “name is ethel, pale, loner, likes shakespeare, wears hoodie, highschooler, lost a girlfriend, wants revenge, really edgy” to Ethel Ash

so basically. ethel lost both parents when he was young and was put in foster care, bouncing from home to home without really having a place to belong. he didn’t feel wanted by anyone, didn’t have support from any adults in his life, started trouble just to get some goddamn attention bc he felt invisible and it only led to people labeling him as dumb and a problem. bc of the lack of support in his life, he fell in with the wrong people when he was in highschool. fights. petty theft. vandalism. that kind of stuff. sent to juvie a few times because he got caught. at this point, his hair was just plain brown and he doesn’t dye it until much later.

then he graduated highschool, but only barely. he’s pretty smart, interested in philosophy, strategy, math, and classical literary works (shakespeare which is p much the only part of his original backstory that survived) but his teachers essentially labeled him a problem child and gave him next to no attention. so he p much accepted society’s label that he’ll always be no-good and kind of ran with it.

he got involved in organised crime after he graduated and by organised crime i meant the mob. he became involved with the mob in california (where he lived) and bc he’s smart and well-versed in like strategy and math, he kind of picked up being an informant. like. he became that one guy people in the mob turned to for info. doesnt particularly like being involved in the shady deals that go down, but if he’s being an informant, he’s needed. and if he’s needed, he has somewhere to belong.

so he overworks himself. sleeps little, eats less, and essentially becomes a machine who haunts the local coffee shop typing on a laptop that’s protected from everything under the sun. he wears a hoodie over his creepy smiley face shirt which he just nicked from some random dpt store to keep himself from being seen by the security cameras and is essentially a fucking internet gremlin with next to no face-to-face human interaction.

but of course, this (coupled with vices like drinking and smoking) takes a toll on him and his body finally gives out and he collapses in an alleyway. not passed out, but definitely delirious from lack of sleep and food. which, considering his criminal background, would fuck him over if he got seen by some random person and reported to the police. or worse, sentence him to death if he got spotted by someone from a rival gang who would love to get rid of someone dangerous like him.

instead, he got found by c. i will call her camilla in this instance bc i genuinely don’t remember her name even though she got a big reboot to her character as well. ethel’s like. 20-21 at this point. camilla is 22 and is in a prestigious college taking a double major in english and food management. she’s not particularly rich, but is upper middle class with a single mother living in new york who fully supports her in what she wants to do and regularly calls her to make sure that she’s safe. and camilla, spotting this dude who looks like death incarnate, stops and makes sure he’s okay and ethel keeps telling her not to call the cops or call an ambulance.

and camilla, also very smart but has enough chaotic dumbass energy to sink a ship, takes ethel to her apartment where he devolves into a high fever and she helps him through it.

he gets better and is just ????? towards camilla because she’s nice to him even though he did nothing for her. he leaves her apartment as soon as he can, but they end up running into each other again at the fucking coffee shop bc im a sucker for cliche and they kind of clicked.

they bond over shakespeare together because camilla’s an english major and ethel’s a fucking nerd for shakespeare. he doesn’t tell her what kind of work he does, but she figures it out anyway because she’s not an idiot. there are bruises on ethel’s body and his eyes always dart around the room, looking for an exit. she lets him know that she knows, and she lets him know that it’s not his fault that the world let him down, that he felt that he didn’t belong.

and ethel kind of breaks after that? like. he very reluctantly works as an informant in gangs bc he’s chasing the high of being needed and wanted and this random college girl just up and tells him that it’s not his fault that he’s never felt warmth in his goddamn life?

she doesn’t try to change him bc she’s in college and she has essays to fucking worry about and ethel never even does anything like dox some innocent soul so while she’s kind of uncomfortable with ethel’s job she’s not like majorly concerned about it. its a rule that they never talk about ethel’s job when they hang out bc ethel doesn’t like talking about what he does and who he associated with because of the issues of his childhood and she really doesn’t want to think about the fact that there are a lot of bad people her best friend associates with bc he feels like he has no choice so it’s kind of silence on that topic.

but ethel kind of changes himself. he wants to change. bc hey. it’s not too late. he hasn’t done something like murder so if he quits and turns himself in, he can get like a few years at most and come out and live a better honest life. and like. camilla’s floored and flattered that her friend would do this because she inspired him to do better? and she’s like “all my life, i wanted to start my own cafe and when you get out, ill hire you. how’s that sound” and they’re like. both soft and ethel is fully fucking prepared to go to the police and out literally every single motherfucker he worked with and turn over a new leaf.

but then someone catches wind of what he plans to do.

and fucking murders camilla.

bc they thought that camilla was forcing ethel to change for her and the logic is that “if the person telling him to quit and betray us is dead, then he wont go through with it” but it completely fucking backfires.

and ethel goes fucking ballistic.

instead of just going to the police like a normal person and confessing everything like the names of the people he works with and letting the police deal with them. he just straight up drops off the grid. and fucking mails the goddamn police things like full names, addresses, safehouses, etc. he straight up obliterates the gang he works with by systematically doxxing them to the fucking police one by one, ruining all of their operations, and hunting them down one by one.

this is the point where he dyes his hair black, but only streaks of it to remind himself of camilla. camilla had planned on streaking her hair hair red bc it goes well with her black hair and ethel streaked his hair black to remind himself of her. he doesn’t turn himself yet in bc he doesn’t plan on doing that until he literally finds all of the men and women he’s worked with in the past and leads them to their arrest and it’s an ongoing thing because his former colleagues went into hiding so he’s having some difficulties.

but he still plans on turning himself in once he’s done. and once he gets out, he plans on starting that cafe. and he’s going to fill it with bookshelves of classical literature. and he’s going to keep living his goddamn life.

and i wrote most of his backstory in math class because i genuinely could not give a shit about math. and that’s ethel. my son. my child. my baby. i love talking about him. he’s precious and i adore every inch of him.

[chimcharstar]

1 THROUGH 55 AND 1 THROUGH 30 GO GO GO

LETS FUCKIN GO

tumblr please actually make this a keep reading

55 interesting questions you should drop in someone’s inbox

1. If you didn’t have to sleep, what would you do with the extra time?

I ALREADY WATCH NETFLIX AND AGONIZE OVER MY STORY

2. What’s your favorite piece of clothing you’ve own/owned?

MY JACKETS. ANY CHEST OBSCURING, BROAD SHOULDERED, COZY JACKET

3. What hobbies would you get into if time and money wasn’t an issue?

DANCING, ID NEED TO GO TO CLASSES OR SOMETHING

4. What would your perfect room look like?

IM ACTUALLY PRETTY HAPPY WITH MY ROOM BUT IVE ALWAYS WANTED A LAVA LAMP, AND 1800 MORE PLANTS COULDNT HURT

5. Do you play sports?

NO

6. What fiction place would you love to go to?

SINNOH REGION

7. What Job would you be terrible at?

DEBT COLLECTION. I WOULD BE GIVING SHIT TO PEOPLE FOR FREE. I COULDNT BEAR BEING ENCOURAGED TO FORCE PEOPLE WHO CANT PAY FOR SOMETHING TO PAY MORE

8. If you could turn any activity into an Olympic sport, what would it be?

SERVING. HOW MANY PLATES CAN YOU CARRY AT ONCE

9. What’s the most annoy habit other people have?

WALKING IN MY SPACE BUBBLE WHEN MY SENSES ARE OVERLOADED

10. What skill would you like to master?

A SECOND LANGUAGE

11. What would be the most amazing adventure to go on?

THE ONE FROM MY DREAM WHERE I KISSED A GIRL DYED MY HAIR BLUE AND WE ELOPED TO BRAZIL TO RAISE SHEEP

12. What’s your favorite drink ?

THAT CHRISTMAS SHIT. PEPPERMINT MOCHA AT STARBUCKS. A FRIEND GOT IT FOR ME ONCE. NOW I ORDER IT A BILLION TIMES.

13. What state or country would you never like to go back to?

I HAVE NOT TRAVELLED MUCH EVER

14. What songs do you have completely memorized?

I DONT REMEMBER LYRICS SO MUCH, BUT I COULD PROBABLY REMEMBER HOW MANY SONGS GO COMPLETELY

15. Are you usually early or late?

LATE. IM GETTING BETTER THOUGH

16. What takes up too much of your time?

GETTING OUT OF BED

17. What do you wish you knew more about?

SWORDS

18. What are some small things that make your day better?

COFFEE. SOMEONE SAYING SOMETHING NICE TO ME.

19. What TV channel doesn’t exist but really should?

QUEER EYE BUT BY TRANS PEOPLE FOR TRANS PEOPLE

20. Who has impressed you the most with what they’ve accomplished?

YOU. AND ME. ITS GROWTH

21. What age do you wish you can permanently be?

21, SO I HAVE TIME TO FIGURE OUT WHAT THE FUCKS GOING ON

22. What TV show or movie do you refuse to watch?

13 REASONS, THE BOOK WAS TRIGGERING SO I WONT RISK IT

23. What would be your ideal way to spend you weekend?

TAKING A WALK, HAVING COFFEE, WATERING PLANTS… IM HAPPY

24. What’s something in your life that’s considered a luxury?

I HAVE PERFUME...

25. Is there anything you’re too young/old for?

TO YOUNG TO NEVER DRINK. TOO OLD FOR POKEMON

26. What’s your favorite genre book or movie?

I DONT HAVE THE ATTENTION SPAN FOR EITHER BUT I SEEM TO LIKE URBAN FANTASY A LOT

27. How often do you people watch?

I THINK IM SO POLITE BUT HONESTLY, I QUIETLY SCRUTINIZE SO MANY PEOPLE ON THE TRAIN EVERY DAY AND GUESS AT THEIR PERSONAL HABITS AND SELF IMAGE.

28. What’s the best single day on the calendar?

MY BIRTHDAY, SAGITTARIUS SEASON RULES BABY

29. What are you interested in that most people haven’t heard of?

I DONT KNOW ABOUT ANYTHING PPL HAVENT HEARD OF BUT IM INTERESTED IN BLACK HOLES

30. Do you relax after a hard day?

FOOD. NETFLIX. DECOMPOSING ON TUMBLR

31. What’s the best book or series you’ve ever read?

I HAVENT READ A BOOK I REALLY LOVE IN AGES. HARRY POTTER AND ARTEMIS FOWL WERE MY FAVOURITES GROWING UP, BUT CORNELIA FUNKES BOOKS SLAPPED AND HIS DARK MATERIALS WAS GORGEOUS

32. Where’s the farthest you’ve ever been from home?

IDAHO?

33. What’s the most heart warming thing you’ve ever seen?

LUCIFER WAS LIKE YOU DESERVE SOMEONE WHO CARES ABOUT YOUR BORING MIDDLE NAME JANE AND KNOWS THAT EVERY MURDER BREAKS YOUR HEART AND YOU SIMPLY DESERVE BETTER SO NO MORE MOMENTS WHILE THEYRE HAVING A MOMENT AND CHLOE IS WATCHING THIS FUCKING IDIOT AND IVE WATCHED THIS BEFORE SO I KNOW SHES GONNA KISS HIM AND THEN THEY KISS

34. What’s the most annoying question that people ask you?

ANY SMALL TALK QUESTIONS

35. Would you give a 40 minute presentation with no preparation?

YES. ID MAKE THAT SHIT RIGHT UP. SKILLS

36. What’s something you think everyone should do at least once in their lives?

GIVE ME A HUG AND SOME CHOCOLATE

37. Would you rather go Hand Gliding or Whitewater rafting?

HANG GLIDING

38. Dream car?

SOMETHING I DONT HAVE TO WORRY WILL FALL INTO PIECES AT ANY MOMENT

39. What’s something so many people are obsessed with and you just don’t understand why?

STRAIGHT LOVE SONGS

40. What are you most looking forward to in 10 years from now?

HAVING A CAT

41. What’s something you’ve been meaning to try but haven’t gotten to it?

DECORATING THE DOLLHOUSE I RESCUED FROM THE BATHROOM

42. What’s the best thing that’s happened to you all week?

IM NOT VERY FAR THROUGH THE WEEK AND I HAVENT ENJOYED MOST OF IT BUT PEOPLE SAYING ADORABLE THINGS

43. How different was your life one year ago?

NOT A LOT DIFFERENT, IM JUST LONELY IN THE CITY NOW, MINUS A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP, ONE YEAR ON T

44. What/who would you rate 10/10?

MY CACTUS JAKEN. I DROPPED HIM SO MANY TIMES AN ENTIRE HALF OF HIS SPIKES ARE FLAT SCARS. AND LOOK AT HIM. THRIVING

45. What kind of art do you enjoy the most?

GENUINELY MADE ART

46. What do you hope never changes?

MY T PRESCRIPTION

47. What movie title best describes your life?

I LOOKED THROUGH NETFLIX AND I PICK TWILIGHT

48. What website do you visit most often?

TUMBLR

49. What’s something you’re looking forward to this year?

MY BIRTHDAY

50. What’s something you’d like to unlearn?

FINDING A REASON TO CANCEL EVERY SINGLE LITTLE THING

51. Where would you spend all your time if you could?

WALKING BY SOME RUNNING WATER

52. What age would you like to live to?

80. THATS MY MENTAL HEALTH ANSWER

53. What’s something you’re most likely to become famous for?

SOMETHING CREATIVE WOULD BE AWESOME

54. What’s something you’re most likely to be arrested for?

CRIMES

55. What’s something you really want but can’t afford?

A CAT

Lgbt+ ask game

What do you identify as and what are your pronouns?

I’m even a little shaken by a questioning state right now but for a while I’ve felt the best fit is the androgynous label -- I read a description of it being the purple on a pink to blue scale, both at once but not specifically either one, and something else by itself. I’m also happy with a cryptic masculine grey area. My pronouns are he/him.

How did you discover your sexuality, tell your story?

During the Puberty 1.0 nightmare, I was basically living someone else’s life, and any attraction I felt wasn’t in relation to myself. I felt disconnected from my body and gender and everything too, and I felt a lot of social pressure to experience a certain type of attraction, fit into a certain role, et cetera, and none of these feelings existed in me at all, so I used to identify as ace. When I realized I was trans, I was too caught up in the, transition safely, my life is a lie, stopping dysphoria drama to focus on this, but I had an idea I might be a gay guy judging from my gay creative writing until I caught feelings for a girl and realized this wasn’t the first time that had happened. Some bi positivity and nonbinary rage later, I am reminded that gender is a joke.

Have you experienced being misgendered? What happened and how did you overcome it?

Yes of course A LOT. Starting with my parents, who do it aggressively and maliciously. And plenty from strangers and customers, mostly after hearing my voice pre-transition. It used to hurt terribly because I was dealing with so much other stuff at the time, and one little thing could be the last straw, so I used to react strongly and harshly, to people you express yourself to anyway. On T, I’ve been so much more chill and confident, and it’s less painful to accept that some people just don’t know any better, although that doesn’t change its effect.

Who was the first person you told, how did they react?

I don’t remember, I think it was a high school friend. I vaguely remember texting someone in a bathroom during a crying session at work. My high school friends were all warm and supportive.

Describe what it was like coming out, what did you feel?

It was scary as hell. I’m sure coming out (with your gender specifically) is scary by nature because it’s a huge truth to be telling that can really change how the people you love perceive you, for better or for worse, but for me, I’m also thinking with the dread and certainty that my family would be too conservative and potentially dangerous. Coming out to my family was one of the worst, most painful things I’ve ever been through -- being kicked out and laughed at, a lot of drama, confrontations, Bible readings and being ganged up on at odd hours, trying to comfort my mom who took it as her personal failure -- I was shaking with adrenaline 24/7. I think of the “I’ll suffer through anything as long as it has meaning” comment that was about angsty fanfics, but knowing the truth about myself was a source of unshakable strength and it felt refreshing and even triumphant to say, like I was giving myself permission to exist for the first time. I came out a bunch of times, though...

If you’re out, how did your parents/guardians/friends react?

My family reacted mostly badly, my sister is a little confused but has the spirit, and my friends have been wonderful.

What is one question you hate people asking about your sexuality?

It’s more of a gender thing, but I hate it when people imply that I shouldn’t be on T or are subtly trying to talk me out of it with their questions. After all the disrespectful as fuck bullshit I heard from my parents, I’m tired of this.

Describe the style of clothing that you most often wear.

Zombie apocalypse denim? Gay Layers

Who are your favourite lgbt+ ships?

I’m not really emotionally invested in these “ships” you cool kids are talking about. I like canon, age-appropriate ones.

What does makeup mean to you? Do you wear any?

I’ve never really worn makeup. I brazenly never bothered to growing up, and if it had an effect on me socially, I was too tuned out to care. My sister always wanted to do my hair and makeup, but I wasn’t interested and wouldn’t let her, much to her frustration. I wore some for a musical once though, and I had no idea what I was doing and it was extremely uncomfortable. I felt what I know now is dysphoria and ended up using the lipstick to draw. Another aspect to this is my family forbade it (or my dad made the decision for everyone), not that it made my sister feel less pressured to wear it, so maybe it was some female presentation I could easily get out of. For that reason, I don’t have super strong feelings about it. Not understanding it probably resulted in me feeling left out a lot among my peers.

Do you experience dysphoria? If so, how does that affect you?

Yes. Before my realization, it was a numb horror I wasn’t consciously aware of, ruining nice things growing up to the point where I feel like I missed out on being a teenager. I remember it as feeling nauseous while sitting in a corner, feeling like none of my clothes ever fit for some mysterious reason. Living with my family in the closet, it defined my life, and I was obsessed with my presentation. These days, it does not bother me on that level at all, except a minor freakout now and then if I get really wild and wear feminine clothes. Or I still feel it in more subtle ways, when I default to customer service voice, or when guys my age are twice my height and I look aaaall the way up at them and wonder what gender they see me as.

What is the stupidest thing you’ve heard said about the lgbt+ community?

Trust me, I have heard truck loads of dumb shit and the winner is the Gay Agenda is R****a’s propaganda to weaken the integrity of North America. Considering what is happening over there, it was enragingly stupid.

What’s your favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?

I feel like I can be myself around lgbt+ people. I don’t feel like I have to hide stuff or put on a show, and I’m not afraid because it’s familiar territory.

What’s your least favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?

Aside from obvious problems like TERFs, ace discourse. Ace people are part of the community if they want to be and that’s enough on that, my skin is already breaking out.

Have you ever been to your cities pride event? Why or why not?

I finally went to a Pride event this year! I was surprised it was the first one I’d been to, then remembered my parents discouraged me from going anywhere, never mind to a gay where.

Who is your favourite lgbt+ Icon/Advocate/Celebrity?

I can’t think of many people right now, but Leslie Feinberg seems awesome, and some quotes from Stone Butch Blues are very validating.

Have you been in a relationship and how did you meet?

No. Technically I have been in one, but it was shitty and ridiculous, and basically platonic, and I don’t want it to count.

What is your favourite lgbt+ book?

I barely read… I read Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe in high school and it was honestly so precious.

Have you ever faced discrimination? What happened?

Yes. I got kicked out (but then kicked back in again), had my stuff stolen and damaged, was verbally harassed… and I was indirectly fired by an employer, but We Will Never Know Why...

Your Favorite lgbt+ movie or show?

Queer Eye! I don’t know of many though, and some important ones, I just haven’t watched.

Who are some of your favourite lgbt+ bloggers?

My mutuals :D

Which lgbt+ slur do you want to reclaim?

I’m okay calling myself queer.

Have you ever gone to a gay bar, or a drag show, how was it?

No, but I did see some drag performances at the one (1) Pride event I went to, and they were jaw-dropping.

How do you self-identify your gender, and what does that mean to you?

I’m not sure what this question means, but I decide what fits right by what makes me feel the most alive and emotionally real and in the moment. What makes me feel the most attractive to be honest. There’s a post about dysphoria I saw going around, the things on it are basically what I use to figure things out.

Are you interested in having children? Why or why not?

I am actually! Not anytime soon, but I’m the responsible type for sure, and judging by the way I love growing plants and being around animals, I’m probably a nurturing person. I actually like kids too, lol, they’re just so high-energy.

What identity advice would you give your younger self?

You’re a boy. Go!

What do you think of gender roles in relationships?

I think people are going to have different ways of expressing themselves that make them happy, but… I don’t think they should infringe on basic human decency. When I hear “role” I think of acting a certain way because someone told you to, something I want to disagree with on the spot.

Anything else you want to share about your experience with gender?

People move out of my way on the sidewalk and take me seriously now. Privilege or self-confidence… I never want to forget what it used to be like, or get too entitled.

What is something you wish people know about being lgbt+?

That it’s simply living one’s reality. I think that trips up a lot of straight people -- that some people just come like this, and they don’t have to make it fit into their personal identity.

Why are proud to be lgbt+?

Because I worked hard to be alive and happy right now. I’m proud of choosing to get through those rough patches, take care of myself, heal, take walks, cook breakfast, learn healthy coping mechanisms, that was out of love for myself and a defiant conviction that I have a place in this world.

[sometimes-i-write-4-you]

Siren valentine's (pt. 1)- Dean Winchester x reader

I was hoping to finish before valentine's, but i have my senior production (i'm majoring in theater) so i never got the chance. Here's part 1, i'll post the rest when i'll finish this fic.

Sitting alone at a coffee shop was one of the things you hated the most, especially on valentine's Day. Everyone were in couples, and you were sitting with your computer and headphones on, pretending to work. The couples around you made you uncomfortable with all their kissing and touching, so you focused on the sound of your favorite album. You heard a feminine voice wishing a happy valentine’s day, and turned up the volume. As the last song came to an end, you packed your things and left the coffee shop.

You arrived to the office you worked at. Being a secretary was not your dream job, but this company paid well and it was safe, safer then being an actor like you always wanted.

“... Ben’s Coffee shop is now a crime scene” the reporter said, and the name of the coffee shop you went to this morning caught your attention. “What the fuck?” You muttered to yourself, focusing on the tv. “The place is filled with bodies, all are bleeding from their ears. Another interesting fact about the bodies, all create a heart shape once you look at them from above” the reporter continued. You were completely shocked to see that, as you were there half an hour ago and everything was fine. You texted your roommate you're fine, since you knew she'd be worried sick if she saw this.

For the rest of the day you felt weird, you were so confused about what happened in Ben's Coffee Shop. Ben was such a nice guy, he didn't deserve to die, there is no sense to this situation - why would anyone kill the people there? Sure, they were annoyingly cléshe, but that's not a reason to commit mass murder.

-time skip-

You got home, finally. You started to cook some pasta. You blasted some music you liked. Your roommate worked late, so you had the entire flat to yourself. She hated “Kansas”, so you took advantage of the fact she wasn't there to listen to your favorite album, “Leftovers”".

“Carry on my wayward son, for there'll be peace when you are gone” you sang along. You emptied the pot through a strainer “Don't you cry no mooooore” you returned to singing. The knocks on the door were right on the beats, so you almost didn't notice them. Once you realized the knockings were not a part of the song, you ran to the door and looked through the mesh. Two guys in suites were standing there, looking seriously at the mesh, therefore at your eye. You opened the door, and they looked at you. “Hello, miss (l/n), I am agent Mike Brown, and this is my partner Nick Williams” one of them said, both pulling an FBI id card. He had apple-green eyes, dark blond-ish hair and some facial hair. He was handsome, definitely. The other guy was just as pretty, but in a different way. His hair was longer, and in a brown shade that went well with his blue eyes. You smiled at them. “Uh, hi. How can i help you?” you asked. “First of all, can wear come inside?” Nick asked. You nodded and moved, letting them in. They both sat on the couch. “Never thought i'd ask someone to turn off “Kansas”, but we have a couple of questions regarding this morning, so can you..” he asked, motioning pressing on a remote. “Oh, yes, sure” you said, and grabbed the remote from the desk. “Water?” You asked as you turned off the music. You felt your heart breaking over the missed opportunity. “Yes, thank you, miss (l/n)” Nick smiled. “How 'bout you, agent…” you paused, trying to remember, “Brown, right?”. He nodded, “yes on the name and the water”.

You took your ball of pasta and sat down. “So, why are you here, agents?” You asked. They both sigh. “This morning, you were at Ben's Coffee Shop, right?” The one you thought was Mike said, although his real name is dean. You nodded. “Well, miss-” “please, call me (y/n)” you cut him off. He looked over at his partner, Nick, or at least so you thought. He was actually looking at his brother, sam. “Ok then, (y/n). Everyone who were there are now dead, but you seem pretty alive to me. Care to explain?” He asked. His words caught you in the middle of taking a bite. You looked at him surprised, “are you saying i did it?!” You said, putting down the pasta bowl. “Well, you are alive and they're not, and i hate to say that, cause you have a great taste in music, but-” Mike replied, but Nick cut him off. “What my partner is trying to say, is that we want to know what happened when you were there. Can you please tell us?”. As he talked, Mike sipped his water to calm down. “Well, i was there, drinking my coffee and listening to music. It was full of those lovey-dovey couple, which was insanely annoying. Not kill-them annoying, just like- nevermind, anyway, i finished listening to my favourite album and then left. A normal visit to a coffee place on a valentine’s day” you said. Mike looked at you and sighed, “nothing else?” He asked, “anything, even if it seems irrelevant”. “Well, there was this lady, i think. She wished everyone a happy valentine's. Once she got on the stage, i raised the volume to max, so i don't know what happened next, it happened like… fifteen minutes before i left, i think” you said. Mike gave Nick a certain type of a look that made you feel like it was important. “Well, (y/n), thank you for your help. If you remember anything else, like what she looked like or anything…” Mike said, “give us a call”. He pulled a card from his pocket. “Okay” you said slowly, taking the card from him. Nick finished his cup of water as Mike spoke, and the handsome agents left your place. You closed the door behind them and as you were pressed play, letting the music distract you from the awful situation, but the suspicious look Mike gave his partner bothered you too much, so you did what anyone would do, and left your house. You catched up to them quickly enough, and got to hear their conversation.

“so, dean, do you think what i'm thinking?” Nick asked. Wait, Dean? His name was mike, he said so, and the card says so, right? You looked at the card. Henry? Who's Henry?

“That this girl was really hot?” the guy who apparently named Dean said. “Be serious, Dean” Nick said, although now you weren't so sure about whether it is his real name or not. “I am very serious, Sammy” Dean said. Oh, of course. They lied about their names. If they lied about that, what else did they lie about? God, what did you let inside your house. “Dean!” Sam insisted, and Dean sighed. “Yes, Sam. If you think it's a siren situation” Dean replied. “It makes sense, yes. I mean, this (y/n) girl is fone, cause she didn't hear the singing. It takes a siren about 15 minutes to infect people using only her voice, she left right on time. Everyone we're dying right behind here” Sam said. “what the fack?”. The words came out of your mouth louder than you expected. “Dean…” Sam muttered, and his head was pointing at you. A part of you wanted to hide, but the other part of you wanted answers. As you debated what to do next, the deep voice you thought belonged to a Mike Brown said “god dammit, (y/n)”.

Well, answers it is. “Heyyy” you said awkwardly, smiling at them and approaching, “so. Sam, Dean, care to explain what thE FUCK?” You said, your voice getting louder as you go. “Well, i see you heard our names. Great. Sam?” Dean said, looking at his partner. “Uh, yeah. We are Sam and Dean and we are..” Sam started, but you cut him off. “Not real FBI agents? Unless FBI stands for…. I don't know, fake-” you started. “we are not FBI” Dean said. “Jesus Christ, what have i let into my house? Regina is going to kill me-” “then don't tell her” Dean cut you off once again. “well, if you're not FBI, then who the fuck are you?” You ask. “We're hunters. We hunt. Monsters” Sam says. The look Dean gave him was a sort of death glare you've never seen before. “What?” You replied, staring at them with your eyes wide open. “Ya'know. Vampires, werewolves, ghosts, demons. That type of crap” Dean said. You felt so weird. What they said was crazy. Impossible. But they looked so calm, and there was no sign of them lying - no nose itches, no looking left. But on the other hand, they didn't look like they're lying to you a second ago, but that turned out to be lies. You looked straight into Dean's eyes. “Okay. I'm going to ask once again. Who the fuck are you and what the fuck are you doing here?” The words came out of your mouth so smoothly, and the fear was barely heard through. He looked right into your eyes. “We are Sam and Dean Winchester, Brothers and hunters. We are here because of the freaky death this morning” he said. Sam looked back and forth at you and Dean. The eye contact was intense. You were mad, he was upset. “Fine” you sigh, “i believe you. You two may be good liers, but there is no reason you'd make this crazy shit up. So how can i help?”. Dean and Sam both look at you like your crazy. “You want to help us? Not run back to your place and drink every alcoholic beverage you can find?” Dean apoke first. You nodded, “i mean, if i'll say i'm not going to drink over this, it's a lie. But innocent people are dying, and my life as a secretary are too boring for me. If i have a shot at an adventure, i'm definitely taking it” you replied. “Well…” Sam started, and looked at Dean, “maybe there's something you can do”.

“Sam, are you crazy? She is not a hunter! She cant-” Dean started, but Sam cuts him off. “she’s gonna be with you, Dean” he sighed. “We can't put her life on the line like that, Sammy” Dean insisted, and this time it was your turn to say something. “Dean, i don't care. It's a good plan, and i trust you. I'll have ear plugs so i won't hear the siren and-” you started, but stopped once Dean gave you a strange look. “Fine” he said, “but we gotta train you a little bit first”. Before you had a chance to reply, he grabbed your wrist, and as an instinct you pulled your arm up, facing your palm like a mirror and with the free hand you twisted his wrist and kicked his crotch. You only realised you did that when a scream escaped Dean's mouth. “Oh my god, sorry. I'm so, so sorry. It's an instinct” you said, giving him a small smile, “i'll get you some ice, and-” you said, going to the kitchen. “-and you can, uh, put it where i hit you” you said awkwardly, giving him the bag of ice you had on your fridge. “You mean my fucking-” he started, but Sam cuts him off. “Well you don't seem to need self defence training. How are with guns?” He asked. You started at him. “Guns?”. “Yes, you know, we need to fight freaking monsters. You can't just kick their-” “Dean! A girl beat you, get over that and let's continue” Sam cuts him off once again. “Well, my dad always wanted me to go hunt with him. Not the same things you hunt, but i can use a gun. Kind of. I was never good at it. I aimed for the center, hit the right corner, aimed for the right corner hit the center” you shared, and Dean looked at you, still mad. “Well then, aim for the right corer, darling” he smiled. You rolled your eyes. “What? We've been dating for a few months and we are going to celebrate tonight”. “(Y/n), you never told me you have a boyfriend” your roommate said as she walked into the room.“It's cause i don't” you replied as she hugged you. “Then who are these two pretty boys?” She asked. “Belle, these are…” you paused. You weren't sure what are you supposed to tell her. “FBI, i'm agent Brown, he is agent Williams. Your friend here was just giving us the details of today's morning at the coffee shop known as Ben’s Coffee Shop” Dean said. “Then what is it about the two of you dating. And why do you have a bag of ice on your-” Belle wondered out loud. “It's a long story, Belle” you cut her off. “Well then, i leave you here and take some food to my room” she said. Once she closed the door behind her, you felt terrible. “I can't believe i'm hiding something from her. We've been best friends for years, i never hide things from her” you said quietly. “It’s for the best, love” Dean said with a cocky smile. “We are not on our fake date yet, Love” you returned, smiling. “Guys, keep the flirting for later, okay?” sam said. “I'm not-” you started, but Sam ignored you and kept talking. “So let's just go over the plan one more time. You two are going on a date where she'll perform. We just need to find out where is it and when” Sam summarized the plan. “And how are we gonna do that?” You asked. Sam sat next to your open computer and googled “Ben's coffee Shop”. He opened the facebook page and there it was. “This valentine's Day, Sierra Stone is coming to perform at 9:00-9:30 for every one who needs to go to work and can't have a nice dinner with their significant other” Sam read out loud the post, and then proceeded to google her name. “Tonight at Tony's. It's a bar not too far from here. (Y/n), you better get ready cause it's 30 minitus away and starts at 22:00 Sam said. “so will Dean pick me up at 21:15? We should take some time to set up or maybe like, there will be traffic and-” “yes” Dean cuts you off, “you have an hour, use it”. You nodded, “don't worry”.

[stargleeksil-blog]

Criminal Minds s03e20 Lo-Fi review - or more aptly named: ...

Episode 20 – Lo-Fi

So this is it! The finale of season three! I am so excited about this, this is unreal, dudes!

Alright, let’s cut the crap.

Let’s see what happens

LADY LIBERTY!

MANHATTAN!

I’m already in love with this episode XD

TIMES’ SQUARE!

SUBWAY TO DOWNTOWN AND BROOKLYN!

Why does it look like that guy has a bomb?

Wait. Did that dude actually shoot the guy who looked like he had a bomb? What the fuck?

Something’s not right.

Awwww! JJ and Will are going to pick out cribs! So cute!

Whoa. Straight to business, not even sitting down, okay.

“Five shootings in two weeks, it’s about time we got the call.”

Yeah, no kidding!

“22-caliber pistol’s only 152 decibels. New York streets and subways are routinely well over 100. It could be people aren’t even registering the gunshot until the unsub’s already leaving the scene.”

Damn.

“They sound like mob hits.”

Damn, straight.

“Except none of them have ties to organized crime.”

Oh, crap

“That’s the best image they have?”

Ooh, judgy JJ. I love it.

“Son of Sam all over again.”

:O that is some big words there, little poodle.

Voltaire: “The man visited by ecstasies and visions, who takes dreams for realities is an enthusiast. The man who supports his madness with murder is a fanatic.” DAMN. That is some powerful stuff.

“How come I only get to travel with you guys like once every two years?”

“Trust me, mama, it can get old.”

“Oh, right, like the way that spa treatments in 5-star hotels can get old.”

Can we just talk about the fact that Derek freaking carried her carry-on for her? Oh my god, so much flailing here. And he has his hand behind his back and everything. Oh my god, my head is just spinning with ideas.

lso, I LOVE her outfit! She dresses like a British noblewoman and I love it.

“Remember the time we got on board and they hadn’t chilled the Cristal?”

“Ooh. I almost quit the BAU that day.”

Oh god, I love Emily and Derek so fucking much.

“Okay, you know what? You guys can joke all you want. ‘Cause I am never leaving this plain.” I hear you, lady. Especially with Derek looking at me like that.

“It doesn’t make any sense. There’s no common victimology, no sexual component, no robbery, no geographical connection.”

“Do the police have any leads?”

“It’s a joint FBI-NYPD taskforce?”

Rossi don’t look happy.

“I heard she can be a little bit of a pain in the ass.”

Oh boy.

“I didn’t think so.”

Yet, Derek once called you a pain in the ass. So that doesn’t say much, does it?

Wait. That lady looks EXACTLY like Hayley!

“Is it just me or does she look exactly like Hayley?”

Thank you, JJ, for confirming I haven’t gone bananas.

POODLE FACE

“What can you tell us about the city’s surveillance system?”

Bam, no wasting time, goddess. God, I love you.

“And I’ll have complete access?”

Isn’t handing her the access kind of dangerous? She’s one crazy girl, isn’t she? XD I’m kidding. She’s amazing. I love her.

“I see you brought your own computer.” About Reid. HEY! No insulting my puppy!

“They, um … liaised when she was at Scotland Yard.”

“Of course.”

Oh my two lovelies! I love it when they gossip XD

And Morgan’s like, I don’t like that he has secrets with her.

“What can you tell me about Derek Morgan?”

WHAT? What’s this about? Have they met before? What’s going on?????

Garcia on the scene, everyone should be afraid XD

“Bitchin’, how many cameras?”

Did she just say bitching? Oh my god, I love this show so much.

“This is icky, but these creeps, they sometimes like to come back and watch the police deal with their handiwork.”

I love her choice of words.

“Voila.”

Gorgeous ladies at work.

Poodle coloring.

“Are we boring you?”

Yeah, you do NOT act like that to my babies.

So Derek was a cop in Chicago. Awesome!

“And I need everybody working on this case taking it personally.”

“You have that.” XD I love you baby.

“We’ll see.” WHAT?! Apologize right now, bitch.

“You know what helps me?”

“You make it your own.”

Oh honey, she just uses her own quirkiness to separate herself from the horrors. I love you.

“This isn’t exactly, uh … regulation.”

“Well, then, thank god it’s only us in here.” XD I love you, lady.

“Do you want to see a superfox?” What’s that?

Oh. So she’s talking about Derek. XD I love you.

“.22’s aren’t exactly the weapon of choice these days.”

“Unless you’re Israeli intelligence. That’s what Mossad uses for their political assassinations.”

Good to know.

“A need-motivated killer operates within his own comfort zone. An organized killer with some other motivation will make sure to strike outside that zone.”

Bam. Profiled.

Why did he drop that Tarot card? Weird.

“Let’s not be too quick to decide what we do or don’t have.” WHAT? Why you so bitchy to my baby?

“You mind telling me why I’m catching attitude from her?”

Yeah, do explain, Aaron.

“FBI brass has made it clear to her that if she doesn’t bring this case home, she’s gonna be reassigned. And you are at the top of the list to replace her.”

Wait. They want Morgan to head the NY office? Oh my god! How can he leave baby girl?

“You’re kidding me.”

“Why should you be surprised? You’re good at your job. People notice that.”

“What happened to the bureau patting itself on the back for stealing her away from Scotland Yard?”

Oh honey, you are so amazing for deprecating yourself, but you need to admit you are one to ugh cookie and people are noticing that you are amazing.

Oh crap. Now Derek knows he has a target on his back from the lady who brought them into the case, he’s extra cautious. You smart puppy, you.

So the fucker is playing with them and sending them tarot cards as messages? Oh boy.

“He sprints off in one and walks calmly in the other. it’s two entirely different demeanors.”

WHAT?

“Garcia, are you still there?”

“Would I ever leave you?” oh honey.

“I found something tres weird.” Oh baby, I love it when you speak that voulez coucher stuff to me.

Shit. There are two of those fuckers.

Shit.

“Could be some kind of gang initiation.” Oh boy.

Shemar talking about gangs shouldn’t be this hot.

Oh honey, he’s trying to be helpful, he’s good at this, but then Aaron doesn’t want that bitch to hate on him even more and ruin everything, so he’s stepping in. I’m with both of them, to be honest.

Aw!!!!! Will made it all the way to DC, missed her, and then took the train to New York to see her? Oh my god, I love you Will!

Wait. So JJ didn’t tell anyone she’s pregnant? Why?

Of course Hotch is immediately worried.

Oh, Will, she should have had the time to tell when she was ready. Poor thing.

Wait. He proposed??? WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS SHOW THAT THEY DON’T SHOW IMPORTANT STUFF???? FIRST MORGAN ASKED GARCIAOUT AND NOW THIS????

I’m with Hotch, she should have told him.

But he’s so happy for her, it’s so clear.

Wait. Now Will is asking her to come back to DC? Why?

Sweetie, you’re carrying Will’s baby inside you, of course he’s going to be worried.

“We only have until seven. So can we argue about names and cribs?”

“Only if you let me win.”

Ha.

“Not a chance.”

KNEW IT!

They’re so cute! I love JJ and Will so freaking much.

Oh come on, cops, stop being pissed at my superheroes. Not all FBI dudes are dicks. Most of them are, but those aren’t.

Okay, can we talk about the fact that Penelope got Lisa to eat while watching surveillance?

And can we talk about the fact that she has one of the biggest coffee mugs I’ve ever seen that actually says ‘Miracle Worker’? I LOVE THIS SHOW AND I LOVE THIS WOMAN AND I LOVE HER CHARACTER.

Crap. They caught someone on the subway of 59th and Lex. Damn.

They were there. Fuck.

And he’s got a gun.

And it’s over. Fuck.

Crap. They lost visual.

Wait. The police aren’t even there? Why?

“We could’ve had that guy.”

“Even if we were on that platform, odds are he would have moved on to somewhere more isolated.”

Um, Negative Nancy much?

“Maybe, but it was wroth taking a shot.”

“We had every available man on the street.”

“And I suggested to you that you use this team.”

EXACTLY.

“Hotch, how am I supposed to look these cops in the eye and tell them that we’re actually here to help them?” I love you, baby, so much.

“We’re here to present a profile.” REALLY?

“I said to put us at express stops – 14th, 42nd, 59th, and that’s exactly where they hit.”

My passionate cupcake.

��It’s not your place to have this discussion.”

“My place?”

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU HOTCH?

“Focused.”

“From where I’m standing, all your focus is on her.”

WHAT? He did not just say that.

“Take a walk. Now.”

Uh. Yeah.

“I just felt like Hotch was taking her side.”

And he kind of was, Derek was absolutely right.

“Rossi, I hope you’re not saying you think I want her to fail.”

“It might be nice to finally be the one making the calls.”

Yup, cuz he’s a typical alpha male and it’s hot as fuck (shit, I just went primeval female there)

And yet.

“And dealing with the politics of running a field office?” Exactly.

“BAU wears people out, man.”

“Look at Gideon.”

“That man was the best, and in the end, he simply ran away.”

“I mean, Hotch hasn’t even thought about cracking a smile in over a year.”

“That man has to take a personal day just to have a conversation with his own kid.”

“I get it.”

You really do, papa bear.

“But I’ll make you a deal. If you think you’re losing it, I’ll pull you out myself.”

“But right now I see someone who wants to get back on the job.”

Oh my god, that tiny gesture just killed me.

God, that scene was powerful as hell. Just seeing Shemar express all those emotions hit me in the heartstrings like crazy. Fuck you, you amazing man. No seriously, I want to fuck you.

Hey, lady, when Derek Morgan comes in and wants to apologize, you let him!

Wait. There’s three shooters now? What the fuck happened while Derek was at the bar?????

“Okay, people, talk to me. Mouseketeer roll call.” OH MY GOD I JUST DIED RIGHT NOW.

I know it’s very serious, but that line was dang funny.

Wait. I don’t get it. Now Rossi thinks the profile they gave was wrong?

I’m confused.

Wait. So they’re targeting those people and trying to get the FBI and NYPD’s attention alone? Not start a city-wide panic? Why?

And I’m only at the 31:30 minute mark, and already this is one of the longest reviews I’ve ever done, and I got nearly 200 pics. Fuck.

Sorry, guys.

Wait. So they’re setting up the ground to wind up the authorities for their big reveal? Shit.

“Talk.” I’ll even sing for you, girl.

Why is Reid asking about the people they have out on the street? I’m scared now.

Oh Emily just described the Cooper to a tee, and I’m so impressed. I love you.

Wait. Someone’s hacked into the surveillance? SHIT.

Shit. Another murder. That brings us up to eight. Fuck.

Did that fucker just kill Detective Cooper???? FUCK YOU! I actually liked that guy!

And Emily totally shot one of the unsubs. Good for you, lady!

Wait. Now Emily’s second-guessing her actions? Why?

“He shot a cop. You did what you had to do.” Exactly, babe.

Wait. So the idiot wanted to get caught? Why?

Yup. They need to go backwards.

Cuz if they’re trying to make them think it’s finished by killing off one guy, that’s dangerous grounds.

“We think we might have a serious problem.”

Another one?

“Terrorism.”

Shit.

“The murderers simulate a bombing. From there they station someone to watch and gauge police response time.”

Fuck.

“At which point they know when to bring in a second bomb.”

Fuck. So all those killings are just dry runs for the finale? Shit.

“Talk to us Garcia.”

It’s still killing me that he’s talking into the hearing part of the phone.

LEARN TO USE A PHONE, SHEMAR!

SERIOUSLY! STOP TALKING INTO THE HEARING PART!

Wait. So Will is going home to New Orleans? Why?

Aw, concerned poodle.

Wait. He’s quitting his job for her and the baby? So they can be safe? OH MY GOD WILL!

Wait. One of the cars that one of the team went into exploded. WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU FUCKING DO THIS TO ME?

 Okay, no episode review, I’m going straight to the next one. Bye.

I’ll throw whatever is left from the post here later when queuing this.

:O

[artificialqueens]

In Retrograde : Chapter Three (branjie) - Ephemerals

Synopsis: After spending months uninspired, Vanessa, a local reporter, becomes infatuated with writing a story surrounding the downfall of a police officer discharged after killing an innocent man.

When Brooke Lynn returns to her hometown after her life begins to fall apart, she doesn’t expect to find solace in the charismatic brunette who seems just a little too invested in uncovering all the secrets of her past.

It was just like any regular Tuesday night patrolling the streets of Toronto for Sergeant Hytes. In the passenger seat sat her partner, Constable Oddly, bored out of her mind. The pair made quite a duo, on and off the field. Over the years, Yvie had proven herself as Brooke’s only decent friend in Toronto. It did involve brazen nights out fuelled by binge drinking and drugs, but it was a nice change for her to be authenticity herself around someone. And honestly Yvie was unlike anyone she had ever met.

“Look, can’t we just ditch this and go back to my place and get stoned,” Yvie pleaded, Brooke shooting her a stern look in response. She impatiently tapped her fingers on the wheel as they aimless drove around.

“That seems like a one-way ticket to getting fired,” Her attention diverted back onto the road.

“The old Brooke would have done it,” groaned Yvie, playfully punching Brooke’s arm, “I miss that bitch.”

“That bitch had to clean up her act, remember.”

Brooke missed the old version of her too. Spontaneous and fun, she didn’t care what people think of her. Now, things were much different. She went to rehab (under the radar, of course), received a promotion and she was just months away from getting married. Brooke couldn’t be a party girl anymore. It was time to grow up. Luckily, Yvie understood what she had to do, but it didn’t mean she had to be happy with it.

“Yeah, you had to clean up your act for that fiancé of yours,” Yvie stated, “Who you don’t even like.”

Yvie was right and she knew it. The couple was doomed from the start. Brooke was much too independent and mostly unfazed by their relationship. During the time they had been friends, Yvie had seen Brooke engage in very brief affairs but she wasn’t one to stick around for long. It might be commitment issues, but Yvie honestly thought it ran deeper than that. So, the fact that Brooke has been with Luke for so long really was a surprise.

“He’s a good guy, Yves.”

“That’s not usually how people talk about their significant others,” Yvie smirked. Brooke just shrugged the comment off. It wasn’t the first time Yvie would make a comment like that, and it wouldn’t be the last time.

“So, are we getting stoned or what, Bee?”

“Shuga would kill us if she found out. Especially if something happens and we don’t report back.”

“That’s not a no,” Yvie playfully added. Brooke shook her head, “It’s a no.”

“I hate when you’re serious, bitch. Let’s hope there is some dumb crimes tonight to keep us busy.”

So, they drive. And just like any regular Tuesday, it’s uneventful. As time dragged on, both girls were awaiting some action. The streets were completely still, not a single soul embarking out into the nightlife.

Then, the radio goes off.

“Requiring backup for a domestic dispute at Wexford. Victim dead on arrival. Suspect armed and on the run. Caucasian, 6’2, slim build. Last seen wearing a burgundy t-shirt and grey sweatpants.”

Yvie beamed in anticipation, “Heading towards Wexford, over.”

…

Brooke is awoken by a violent pounding in her head. Instantly groaning at it’s appearance, too hungover to actually do something about it. It’s beating through her skull like a drum. Unsure how long she was out for, she glances at her phone. 10:27.Her mind wanders, memories of the night before foggy in her brain. That girl. What in the world was up with her?

After futilely trying to go back to sleep, Brooke eventually prys herself away from her bed in search of painkillers. She pads into the en-suite, disheartened by the completely empty medicine cabinet. While there, she washes last nights makeup and grime from her skin. She stares at her reflection for just a moment too long, before treading downstairs to scour the guest bathroom for drugs. Brooke passes her mother in the kitchen without a word, retrieves two ibuprofen capsules and swallows them down with a swig of tap water. Heading back towards her bedroom, she’s stopped in her tracks by her mother.

“Where were you last night?”

“I didn’t know I had to report to you,” Brooke wanders into the kitchen, her mother on her tail. It was easier to rip the bandage off, endure the conversation now rather than actively avoid her. She props herself up against a cupboard awaiting her mother’s scolding.

“While you live under my roof you do as I say,” her mother’s stare is icy cold. Arms folded, stern. For a second, Brooke is taken back to her teenage years, where she could do no right in her mother’s eyes. Her walls are up in preparation for a fight.

“I’m thirty-three, I’m sorry that I assumed I was allowed to be independent.”

“Well, you lost that privilege when you almost died during a cocaine binge, remember?” There’s a beat, Brooke’s mouth agape, “Someone has to babysit you since you constantly fail at taking care of yourself. I’ve booked you an appointment with your old therapist, no discussion.”

Brooke had to admit, she should have seen it coming. Her father wouldn’t have hinted at the idea unless her mother was devising a plan. Yesterday was a warning.

“What if I just don’t-“

“No discussion. The appointments at three.”

Brooke huffs as she storms off like an upset child. She marches up the stairs and climbs back under the covers of her bed. Her head continues throbbing despite the medication but she does her best to doze off, praying she sleeps through that three o’clock appointment.

…

“I don’t think I’m able to write this story, Ms Visage,” Vanessa meekly admits, standing before her editor. Deadlines fast approaching, Michelle sitting emotionless, scribbling on another reporter’s draft. The office is outdated, with wooden sliding and retro styled furnishing. If the budget allowed for it, the first thing Michelle would do is redesign the place but the reality of working for the local newspaper meant money was tight.

“And why is that?” Her gaze doesn’t wander from her work. Vanessa gulps, billions of excuses flying through her head. I’m unsure how to get close enough to her to get the story. She seems like a nice girl and I misjudged her. I almost knocked her over and she was super pretty and nice to me. I couldn’t even speak to her properly.

She could have had her story, but Vanessa ran straight in the opposite direction.

“I was too ambitious,” it’s a lie.

It peaks Michelle’s interest. She glances up above her glasses, unconvinced.

“Too ambitious? Go on.”

“I wanted to write an exposè, y’know. Deep dive into her life, find out how someone ends up killin’ a kid. Talk to her friends, family maybe.”

“That doesn’t sound ambitious, it sounds like journalism,” Michelle is absolutely unimpressed. She drops the pen from her hand and reclines in her chair. Vanessa stands still, waiting to be reprimanded for wasting her time.

“Miss Mateo, you are a very talented journalist. Much too talented to be writing for this newspaper all your life. You have a rare opportunity here to establish yourself as a reporter. I want you to write this story. Forget the deadline, hand in some shitty pieces about local events in the meantime. Don’t be afraid to pursue this. It’s the first interesting idea that has come my way in years.”

The response was the exact opposite of what Vanessa expected. She was ready for a slap on the wrist, to forget about the whole ordeal. Write an article about the local nursing home for the hundredth time. Stay content in her slump for a little longer.

There’s a story here begging to be shared to the world. A story like nothing Vanessa has written before. She’s not going to give up this time.

“Okay,” Vanessa is strangely inspired by the challenge, “I accept the challenge, Ms Visage.”

There’s a skip in her step as Vanessa leaves her editor’s office. Maybe this was her big break.

…

As three o’clock rolls around, Brooke nervously awaits her appointment with her phone glued to her hand. Her frantic texts to Nina receiving instant worried replies. Rightfully so, there was a pattern of Brooke’s self-destructive behaviour increasing after her visits with therapists over the years. Nina didn’t understand why exactly, since the point was to help improve her mental state. But having Brooke confront her feelings head on? It was a risky decision to say the least. A string of texts from Nina come through rapidly one after another.

n: you’ll be fine, b it’s only an hour of ur life i’m going out tonight w work girls u should come x

As much as Brooke would like to go out for another consecutive night, she couldn’t subject Nina to the consequences of her joining them. She wouldn’t be able to live with herself if Nina was ostracised by her colleagues for being friends with a murderer. Nina deserved the entire world. Brooke had come to the conclusion that their friendship was one better off kept secret. For Nina’s sake.

b: don’t think i’ll be welcome

Almost immediately there’s a response:

n: they will love u besides u can’t turn down a drink x

Regardless if she was accompanied by Nina or not, both girls were aware of Brooke’s intentions for the night. As soon as she could possibly leave this building, she will, heading directly towards the closest alcohol vendor. It would be nice if she wasn’t alone while she did it.

b: fine, u have convinced me x

“Miss Hytes? Doctor Envy is ready to see you now.”

…

Tires skid on wet asphalt, blue and red lights flashing, sirens blaring through the city streets. A quarter of an hour had passed of their manhunt, the novelty was finally wearing thin. News gushes through the radio, reported sightings, updates, anything. Eyes glued to signs of movement, Yvie’s soaking up every miniscule detail of the city. Jobs like this one were the exact reason she joined the force. The adrenaline courses through her veins like a drug. Brooke’s extra few years on Yvie had caused her to become jaded. She was just waiting for the excitement to die down so she can clock off and indulge in a glass of wine at home. Of course she wanted the perpetrator to be caught and justice to be served, but pursuits like this were plain exhausting.

A call comes through and Brooke has her fingers crossed it’s home time. Her heart sank as Superintendent Cain’s voice bellowed through the speaks, “Any sightings yet girls?”

“It looks like the apocalypse has hit Toronto,” joked Yvie, “There’s not a single person out.”

“The guy’s Damon Carmichael. Been causing trouble for years,” Brooke recognised the name. She’d never dealt with him herself, but he had been a headache of her colleagues. There was a series of charges scattered all over the county in his name.

“There’s a dead woman rotting in his apartment. I don’t care if you bring back his corpse, I want him caught.”

The phone clicked off abruptly, the orders loud and clear. Brooke let out a sigh as drove down the same street for the umpteenth time. Streetlights dull, barely illuminating the empty road. She’s sure the neighbours are annoyed by them at this point. It was just another night on the job, keeping the country safe.

Out of the corner of her eye, Yvie swore she spotted something. Wound up on anticipation, Brooke just assumed paranoia had finally set in. However, Yvie’s adamant someone’s hiding by the church. Bringing the car to a halt, they decided to investigate. Gun firmly in hand, Yvie exited the car rushing directly into the darkness. Blood pumping, Brooke followed suit hand clutching the gun attached to her waist.

“Police!”

As Yvie announced their presence, something dashed away from them. It’s far too dim for them to work out what they can see. The younger girl is quick on her feet, Brooke in tow. A man emerged onto the dimly lit street. Burgundy sweatshirt, slim, young. A picture perfect match. Both women raised their guns in response.

“Freeze!” Brooke called. The man glanced back as he sprinted ahead. They picked up speed, trailing behind him. Yvie was just in reach, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt. An attempt to tackle him is thwarted as he shoves the younger girl backwards, toppling onto the pavement. He keeps running.

“I said freeze!”

Brooke knew what she had to do. In front, he’s losing traction. Panting heavily, feet battering the concrete. She’s caught up. So has Yvie, who had dusted herself off with more motivation than ever before. With Yvie ahead, Brooke comes to a stop.

I don’t care if you bring back his corpse, I want him caught.

Yvie grappled him around his neck, the man writhing in her grip. His fist flies up, the impact straight to the jaw. He continued to thrash around, Yvie unable to secure her restraint. Hands shaking, Brooke raised her gun. If Yvie tightens her grasp, she’d have a clear shot.

“Fucking bitches!” It’s spat straight onto Yvie’s face. Agitated, she raises her knee into his stomach. He brought his free hand to strike Yvie again.

“Didn’t you ever learn not to hit women,” she hissed directly into his ear. The arm around his neck constricts him just for a moment. He’s still flailing in her grasp, but he’s still enough for Brooke to fire. Finger to the trigger.

Bang.

Bang.

The echoing of the gunshots ring as blood pools at Yvie’s feet. She has let go, but he’s wailing, still squirming on the sidewalk. Two shots straight to the chest. Yvie fell to her knees, drenched in his blood. Streets of Toronto painted red. Everything’s blurry in Brooke’s head. The gun is still raised towards him. She’s frozen.

…

“It wasn’t your fault, Brooke Lynn. You were just doing your job,” Doctor Envy shifts in her seat uncomfortably. The last time Brooke was here, she was just a destructive addict. Miles away from her usual cases in this small town, but things were different now. Years of psychology classes couldn’t have prepared her to be face to face with a murder.

“I wish people would stop telling me that,” Brooke slumps into her chair, sulking. The conversation had run in circles for the first half of the session. Doctor Envy prying into the very few facts she had learnt from the past. Addiction. Self-Injury. Relapse. Usually after years of knowing a client, some walls have been broken down. But everything Doctor Envy knew about Brooke was from medical files and newspaper reports. The most significant information shared was about her relationship with Luke starting and ending. She hated predicting the future of her clients, but it was inevitable. Unless Brooke started opening up about her feelings, she was a lost cause.

Doctor Envy scrawls meaningless notes down on her clipboard, each stroke filling the empty silence. Brooke isn’t going to crack. Not today, not ever. Brooke intently watches the hands on the clock get closer to the moment she can leave.

“You aren’t evil, Brooke.” She says it out loud, her voice shaking slightly. She says because she thinks it’s what Brooke wants to hear. Needs to hear. Brooke acts like it is white noise. Unconvinced by her words, Doctor Envy repeats herself.

“You’re not evil.”

“You don’t know that,” Brooke interjects. Her stare is cold and uninviting. She adjusts her posture, leans forward, spits, “You don’t know anything about me.”

She’s tired of waiting for confessions to pour out. The truth is only going to reveal itself if she rips it out with her own hands. Tough love.

“I know enough. Sometimes, it’s what you don’t say that matters most. Everyone in your life can see that you are struggling and they want to help you. But only you can start that journey to recovery.”

Frustrated, Brooke stands up, “Thank you for your time.”

“Stop running from yourself, Brooke,” Doctor Envy adds. A bookend to a bad conversation.

The door slams shut.

…

Vanessa is dressed to the nines. She’s in a leather ensemble: tight skirt, sandals laced to her thighs, braids flowing down from the crown of her head. Silky is ecstatic with her handy work. Sitting on the floor of her apartment, the girls took swigs from a bottle of vodka. Everyone was ready on time (for once), their cab moments away.

When A’keria had invited them all out, Silky had insisted to makeover Vanessa. It wasn’t a new thing, the girls often took turns dolling each other up. But it was Silky and at times she could be violently enthusiastic. Especially since Vanessa had accidentally ignored them all week, devoted on this story. A story which she was avoiding telling them about, knowing how unimpressed they will be.

They head out to a club the next town over. Nightlife in their small town was lifeless, full of drunks and rowdy men. They preyed on the presence of a female. Vanessa had seen it the night before. She had been around enough that the locals left her alone, but they flocked towards the first sight of fresh meat. It was a more balanced playing field when the numbers were equal. And from what A’keria had said, their group tonight was larger than normal.

“I have something to tell you,” Vanessa shares as they step out of the car. Silky tosses the taxi driver a wad of cash, tells him to keep the change. As he drives off, the girls ask what it is.

“I’m writing a story, somethin’ interesting for a change.” The girls walk towards the end of the line. Vanessa rustles through her purse, pulls out her ID from her wallet. Patiently, A’keria and Silky wait for details.

“It’s about Brooke Lynn.”

Silky and A’keria burst into laughter. The line inches closer towards the door, but they haven’t yet realised. Vanessa raises her eyebrow in confusion.

“Told ya so,” Silky howls, “Knew you were keeping something from us, bitch.”

“Can’t stay away from those bad girls, huh?” A’keria smirks.

A bouncer checks their identification, lazily flipping the card over. He points for them to go past, Vanessa last in formation. A’keria’s on the lookout for her friends as they enter the crowd. Hoards of dancing girls surround them, unknowingly sloshing vodka sodas on the floor with each movement. Gesturing forward, A’keria pushes ahead. Strobe lights pulsate from the ceiling. Their group collides with the other. Vanessa recognises a few of the women. Nina. Honey. Brooke.

Even in the erratic lighting of the club, Vanessa could tell the blonde was staring right at her. Their eyes meet, gaze lingering as Nina tries to introduce them over the blaring music. Brooke pulls away first, coyly smiling. A layer of sweat coats Vanessa’s palms. This was the last thing she was expecting tonight.

[me-youhaveme]

The Riley Diaries Pt19

AU: Riley Matthews is a regular teen,until one day,she is not. Can moving away erase your past? Can you ever move on if you don’t actually accept it? Riley Matthews was a regular teen,until one day,she wasn’t.

A/N: The last episode of GMW gave me inspiration not only for vidding, but for writing too. The next chapter I post will be the last - I already wrote it but I will still not post it because I might decide to change something. I really hope you like this part and that you are still enjoying the story, even though I didn’t update it in a while. Also - Sorry, Auguste. Enjoy xo

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part5 Part 6 Part7 Part8 Part9 Part10 Part12 Part13 Part14 Part15Part16 Part 17 Part18

________________________________________________________

Riley’s POV

Four days have passed since I last talked to Lucas, since he completely shut me out. But I deserved that, no one can change what I did. I was still home – somehow I couldn’t go to town before my flight tomorrow - I wanted to stay here with my parents as long as I could. Sitting in my room, I was looking at the perfect dress I had picked out for prom, even though I wasn’t going.

“Come in,” I said when I heard someone knocking on my door.

“It’s me, honey,” Maya said with a smile while she was entering my room, “I am here to try and change your mind for the last time.”

“You don’t give up easily, do you,” I laughed and got up to give her a hug.

“I want to party with you and Joshy before you leave for Spain,” She started dancing in the middle of the room.

“Joshy,” I threw my head back laughing, “I have to use that.”

“Hey, he’s mine,” She gave me a judgemental look and jumped on my bed.

“I already dated him, he’s all yours now,” I sat next to her and chuckled at her expression.

“I forgot about that,” She shook her head, “You are messed up, Riley Matthews.”

“You have no idea,” I laughed and then looked at my dress again.

“See, I want to be the prettiest girl tonight,” Maya obviously traced my gaze, “But it would be a crime not to wear this beautiful dress tonight and have fun with your friend.”

“Lucas hates me,” I sighed and turned to her, “I can’t go and pretend I am happy.”

“If you are not happy why don’t you stay here and change things,” Maya reached for my hand, “Why do you insist on running away from my brother when you know you want to be with him?”

“I don’t know why, Maya,” I looked down, “Something in me is fighting the feelings I have for him.”

“Then beat it,” She squeezed my hand, “He is suffering, you are suffering. Just try one more time – come tonight.”

“Maya, I –“

“No,” Maya didn’t let me finish, “Just come, try to work things out but don’t push him – simply talk to him, tell him that you are willing to stay and just start over.”

“I don’t know if I am willing to stay, that’s the problem,” I took my hand back, “I am really excited to leave and meet new people and have a new life.”

“But you can’t escape Lucas, you can’t escape what happened to you,” Maya sighed and half smiled, “We are here, and we accept you the way you are. There is always time to travel and meet new people but you will always regret leaving him – believe me.”

I stayed silent for a moment, thinking that Maya may be right. I really loved Lucas, this may be the first time I am admitting it but I have felt it for a long time. Do I really need a new life, do I really need new people when I found some of the best friends here? I was now more confused than I was before.

“I guess I can come tonight and see what happens,” I gently smiled.

“Oh my God, oh my God,” Maya climbed on the bed and started jumping up and down, “I did it, I did it.”

I started laughing and pulled her leg which made her fall on her butt on the bed.

“I am going to regret this, aren’t I?”

“No, never,” Maya hugged me so tight, “I can’t wait to tell Lucas, he is going to be your date and-“

“No,” It was my turn to interrupt her now, “I don’t want Lucas to know, I am coming to the prom with you.”

“But, Riles – “

“Please, Maya,” I looked into her eyes, “I am not going with big expectations anyway and this does not mean I am not leaving, we’ll see what happens.”

“Okay,” She sighed and shrugged her shoulders, “Okay.”

I put on my long white sleeveless tulle dress with flower embroidery top and since I like to stand out, I put on a leather jacket on top of it. I put on my nude high heels and went to the mirror to fix my hair. It was curly, falling freely on my shoulders. I chose a natural look so my makeup was peachy nude.

“Wooooow,” Maya and Josh said in unison when they entered my room, “You will be the queen.”

“Are you kidding me,” I laughed and turned around, “I have been here for like what,5 months? No one voted for me.”

“If it was up to me,” Maya let go of Josh’s hand and came closer to me, “You would be so that you can dance with your king.”

“Did I miss something,” Josh raised an eyebrow, “I am her only king.”

“You are,” I laughed and hugged my uncle, “You will forever be my king.”

“That’s more like it,” He kissed the top of my head and then winked at Maya.

“Come on,” I said, escaping his arms, “Let’s go have fun.”

The minute we entered the gym, everyone’s eyes were on me. Was it because of the unusual look I am rocking? Was it because they thought I wouldn’t show my face in here anymore? I didn’t know, but I slowly started to get nervous.

“It’s okay,” Maya grabbed my hand and we started walking, “It will be okay.”

“I know,” I smiled and looked at the beautiful flower arrangements, “I know.”

“Oh my God,” I heard a loud scream over the music, “You look like a princess.”

“Thank you,” I turned to see Izzy looking me up and down, “You look like one, too.”

“She is my princess,” Farkle came behind her and smiled, “And that perfect pink dress proves it.”

“My girl is a princess, too,” Josh kissed Maya and we all started cheering, making them blush.

“I am so happy you decided to be with us tonight, Riles” Isadora gave me a hug, “You will have fun, I promise.”

“I hope none of you rigged the voting so that I am the queen,” I laughed and they all looked serious for a second, “You didn’t, right?”

“Maybe we did,” Izzy raised her eyebrows, “I mean, I am the most popular girl in the school, and my boyfriend’s father is the principal, so.”

“If I am the queen, I will break you all,” I rolled my eyes, still thinking that they are joking.

“Let’s dance, people,” Maya said, looking over my shoulder before pulling everyone with her on the dance floor.

“I thought you weren’t coming to the prom,” I heard a very familiar voice in my ear.

“I changed my mind,” I closed my eyes for a second, remembering how it feels when Lucas is this close but then I turned around and smiled.

“You look beautiful,” Lucas smiled, looking me straight in the eyes, “Every girl will be jealous of you.”

“Thank you,” I was hoping the dim lights didn’t show my blushing face, “I thought you weren’t talking to me.”

“I never said that,” He was still smiling like we were two best friends, “I told you that I hope you can find whatever it is that you are looking for.”

“Yes, about that-“

“Oh, I am sorry,” Lucas waved at someone, looking over my shoulder, “I have to go now, Riley, but maybe I can catch you up later?”

“Okay,” He passed me with a smile, “I guess.”

“What happened,” Maya was dancing towards me, “Did you tell him how you feel?”

“He had to meet some friends,” I looked down and then back at Maya, forcing a smile, “Come on, let’s dance.”

“Attention, students,” Farkle’s dad walked on the little stage in the middle of the gym, “It’s time to announce your king and queen.”

“It’s happening,” Maya started jumping up and down next to me and I was puzzled as to why she was so happy, “I can’t wait.”

“Now, without further a due,” The principal opened an envelope, “Your king is our golden boy – Lucas Friar.”

Everyone started clapping and cheering – of course he was the king, who could stand a chance against the ‘golden boy’? I smiled when I saw him still so humble and grateful that people like him and appreciate him. Something I never did.

“And his queen tonight is,” The sound of the drum roll was matching the beat of my heart, “Riley Matthews.”

I stood still for a moment, before I looked at Maya and Izzy who were quietly chuckling next to me. I looked at the stage and at first, Lucas was as shocked as me but then he smiled and stretched his hand out. I sighed and started walking towards him but after few steps, I realized that his hand wasn’t for me.

“Sorry, Riles,” Lucas spoke in the microphone, “But I have only one queen.”

With those words, he pulled Sarah on stage and kissed her passionately. In no time, everyone’s eyes were on me, again. I was humiliated in this school, again. I swallowed the tears in my eyes and turned to Maya and Izzy with a smile - they were just looking at me in disbelief.

“I am sorry that your plan didn’t work the way you wanted,” I nodded.

“I am going to kill him,” Josh was ready to go to Lucas but I gently grabbed his hand.

“Don’t,” I smiled with teary eyes, “It’s no use, my job here is done anyway.”

“I am really sorry, Riles,” Maya put her hand on my shoulder, “I am going to talk to him and I will-“

“No,” I shook my head and a tear escaped my eyes, “Don’t, please. Everything is how it is supposed to be.”

“But-“

“I think I am going to call it a night,” I let go of Josh and made a step back, “It was nice to be with you guys, you made my last night here incredible.”

“Don’t leave, please,” Maya tried to stop me but I made another step back.

“I am done with this town,” I kissed her cheeks and hugged them all, “I will see you tomorrow, Josh.”

“I am coming home with you,” Josh insisted.

“If you love me, you will have fun tonight,” I gave him a subtle smile, “Please.”

“I can’t leave you,” He was ready to go home with me but I wouldn’t make him.

“You can and you will,” I nodded, “Your princess is expecting a fairytale, you have to give her one.”

With those words, I turned around and started walking out of the gym. People were whispering as I was passing by - nothing new around here, really. At least this time I can say I tried – Lucas clearly moved on and I am not going to stand in his way.

Lucas’ POV

I drank all night after the prom, still thinking about what happened with Riley. I know I hurt her, but I had to show her I moved on, maybe that way she can leave in peace and not worry about me being heartbroken. I opened the door and found my sister in the kitchen, impatiently tapping her feet.

“You are the biggest idiot on this earth, baby brother,” She spat out, “I can’t believe what you did last night.”

“What,” I grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, “I wanted to dance with my girlfriend at prom night, not with the girl who doesn’t feel anything for me.”

“You humiliated her,” Maya took the bottle off my hands, “She was humiliated in this school once again because of you.”

“I didn’t do anything,” My voice started rising, “I didn’t hurt her or exposed her secret.”

“You might as well have been because you knew what Sarah was planning but that is not my point.”

“Then what is it,” I leaned on the kitchen counter, trying to look like I didn’t care, “I don’t have the whole day.”

“Riley came to prom wanting to make things right, you idiot,” Maya almost screamed at me.

“What,” I pushed off the counter and suddenly, all of my attention was on her.

“Yes,” She threw her hands in the air, “We talked yesterday and she decided to try and make things right with you, but you completely ruined everything.”

“I,” I was in shock, thinking about how stupid I was last night and what a douche I was to Riley, “I didn’t know.”

“That was the point,” Maya was literally beating me up with her words - she was as pissed as I have ever seen her.

“I have to talk to her,” I started looking around, “I have to tell her that I am sorry and that I-“

“You can’t,” Maya interrupted me.

“I know I was an ass but she won’t refuse to see me,” I started running towards the front door.

“Josh took her to the airport hours ago,” Maya screamed after me and I stopped dean in my tracks, already preparing for the worst, “She’s already gone.”

[illbefinealonereads]

Well this is back.

Notes from: chapter 3 & 4 (this book is still sooo tiring).

“He groaned and tightened his grip, pulling me so that I was completely on top of him. I could feel his erection pressing between my legs. I gasped at the feel of it, it was strange but it actually felt nice.” it’s just the third chapter, and this is the second time we’re hearing about his boners.. Can we not?

“I tried to wriggle free, but it just made us rub together in places that I would rather not think about my brother’s manwhore of a best friend touching.” EW.

There’s been some whisper-yelling in this chapter, and it warms my heart that it happened, and my hunch wasn’t wrong.

“Rolling over, I buried my face into his pillow, I could still smell him and it made me feel safe and calm. I drifted back to peaceful sleep for another hour.”  well that’s a sudden change of tone, we went from manwhore to this in 0.5.

“I forgot it’s Terri’s birthday tomorrow, and I have no idea what to get her!” Who’s Terri and where the fuck did she come fromt? Listen, random shit like this shall not be tolerated, especially when the only reason it’s here is to make it seem like this girl has something else to do beside bitch about/run after Liam. It’s stupid writing+dragging the fucking story. PICK A PACE DAMMIT.

Guess who solved the birthday gift problem in three sentences. That counts as rushing. She’s rushing through the dragging.

He’s flirting with her, and she’s not even noticing. Is this supposed to be cute?

““You’re getting better; you lasted at least a minute that last time,” he teased with his trademark smirk.”  In today’s edition of “Is It Teasing, or Is It a Compliment?” I‘m fucking confused.

A quarter of this chapter is dedicated to ice skating, and I bet that nothing else in this book is as detailed as this ice rink date that she doesn’t know is a date yet.

“If your brother finds out I’ve been with you all day he’ll cut my balls off,”

“As I started to fall again he bent down and scooped me into his arms, gripping one of his forearms firmly under my ass, and forced my thighs around his waist with the other hand as if I weighed nothing at all.” Are y’all seriously dry-humping in public right now?

“OK, now he is starting to freak me out. First he knew my shoe size, now he knows what I order at McDonalds?” Now you’re catching up. And wow, he’s so romantic.

“After dinner Jake and Liam went out and got some drink for the party as usual.” This is the opening sentence of chapter 4. It raises some questions, and it never answers them. Questions like ‘Did anyone proofread this?’; ‘Is “as usual” a good phrase to use at the end of any sentence?’ and ‘Why does this sound just weird?’

She’s sighing a lot in this chapter… like a lot a lot.

Our protagonist throws a hissy fit over a three minute exchange. Cause teenagers amirite.

“I dried my hair off, straightening it and applied my make-up. Again, I hardly ever wear any make up, even to parties, so I just added a little silver eye shadow and some mascara, switching my clear lip gloss, for pink.” Two things: 1. I copied this straight from the e-book, I didn’t edit that, the make-up and make up in two consecutive sentences are really there. And lucky I didn’t start counting spelling mistakes, but that would’ve taken far too much time. 2. For someone who hardly wears makeup, silver eye shadow is a bold move.

“I pulled on my midnight blue lacy bra and thong and looked through my closet.” Isn’t she 16? Who owns a thong at 16? Did her mom buy her one? How does one get one? And isn’t it a little stupid that this girl who slutshames her classmates for talking to boys dresses in such provocative strippery way? What I’m basically asking is how weird is it that someone’s mental diarrhea is giving me actual diarrhea?

“I pulled out a pair of black fairly short shorts and a tank top, then slipped on my silver long necklaces and my silver strappy sandals with a little heel.” Great. Now you look like a girl from an early 2000s rap video. When was this fucking book written again?

“and compared to the skanks he and Liam were used to hanging around with, I looked like a nun”

“he doesn’t like guys to look his little sister.” 

“Where’s Kate and Sarah?” Who are Kate and Sarah?

“I grabbed a cup and poured myself three quarters of a cup of Vodka and added a splash of orange juice, downing a shot of vodka whist I was still pouring.” Thanks for the recipe. Let’s review: 1/12 fl.ounce/approximately 2-3 mL of orange juice + ¾ cup/approximately 180 mL of vodka. And then there’s the shot of vodka which is 1 1/2 fl. ounces/44.36 mL…. That’s a whole fucking lot of vodka. I haven’t consumed that much vodka my entire life.

“After a couple of hours I was pretty drunk.”

“Don’t be so stupid, Kate.” Stop insulting these characters whose only crime so far is speaking. DAMMIT.

“The song changed to ‘She’s like a star’, by ‘Taio Cruz’ which is Liam’s favourite song.” Why is Taio Cruz in quotes? But also remember Taio Cruz? Remember that Dynamite song? I love that song. And Break Your Heart? Oh, that was a good song. What is he up to?

“Wait, did I just think about licking Liam like he was a Popsicle or something? I burst out laughing at my own idiocy. Liam pulled back and gave me a ‘what the heck’ face, which just made it funnier.” Your idiocy is no longer funny, but I do prefer drunk you if I’m being honest.

“I could feel him getting aroused but this didn’t bother me. Liam has been pressing his erections on me since I was twelve and he was fourteen.” That’s fucking disgusting. And we’re back to boner talk? Wasn’t this a YA romance, ffs? HOW IS THIS ROMANTIC?

Fuck it, here’s the rest of the boner talk in this chapter: “He wakes up with one every day, and most of the time falls asleep with one too. I just ignore it. It was weird the first time it happened and really freaked me out. He had gone home that morning, so embarrassed that he’d almost cried, he’d spoken to his dad about it and then came back the next night and explained that it was normal for boys to have it happen because he was growing and it was all to do with hormones. I didn’t know whether it was true or not, but I didn’t have any reason to doubt him. It was embarrassing for us both for a month or so, then it was a joke for a while, now we just ignore it completely.” Yeah, I’m reading this book so you don’t have to.

Fuck, I just found out I’m only 14% into this book.

“I just shrugged and left them to it, I don’t need to witness their fight, they’ll be making up in a couple of minutes anyway, they always do.” Her brother and her potential boyfriend are at each other’s throats, and this is her response?

So some random guy starts to kiss her, and she tries to push him off and fails (and I fucking hate that this shit is happening again, remember the prologue?), but Liam comes to help, which of course he does, and can we stop having this awful thing happen in this book over and over again? I’m still at the fourth chapter, and this has happened twice. You can reuse and plot point you want, but don’t reuse it multiple times in the same book.

“After about half an hour, I raised my head and looked at him, he was asleep and looked really peaceful and sweet, and not to mention hot.” Just make up your damn mind about the boy already. Do you love him, or do you hate him?

She liked his thumb and he moaned. And something’s tingling and throbbing inside her. This is some Fifty Shades shit right here. E.L. James is panicking right now.

Okay. Final tally for chapters 1 through 4:

That’s all so far.