#not appearing onscreen but that is a really good summary of Miles Milesing at the end

[regallibellbright]

So I guess I’m liveblogging my reread now, and this ended up being a thing AFTER I've hit Chapter 10 of Mirror Dance, but whatever.

Mirror Dance, Page 4:

Lord Vorkosigan pretended to be Admiral Naismith. And so did he. What, after all, was the difference?

But what is your name really?

His vision darkened in a rush of despair, and rage.

I’d forgotten that Mark is in fact having existential crises at the idea of having an identity outside of being Miles Vorkosigan(‘s clone impersonating him,) somehow, when I'd previously brought up he was giving Mark an identity crisis. I have no idea how I forgot this fact. Mirror Dance is about Mark having an existential crisis. But I think what I forgot is that it's not until Miles shows up to save his ass, and dies, that Mark's willing to think of himself as Mark.

His first three chapters, he's just "he" in his own narration (and since he's impersonating Miles, can't say he's the clone anyway) and dodging the thought of being anyone. Chapter six, Miles shows up, Miles immediately starts taking control of the situation as much as it can be salvaged, Miles points out that if you'd hired the Dendarii outright, Mark, they would've made sure whatever plan they went with WOULDN'T have gone so thoroughly to shit, Miles dies, all from his POV. We go back to Mark's POV at basically that exact second, getting spattered with blood, and the first sentence calls him Mark. Either Miles showing up and going into Big Brother Mode or the trauma of the raid finally gets him willing to think of himself as Mark.

Breaking chronological order in favor of similarities, Page 6:

His resentment boiled up behind his eyes like sinus pain. All this bloody hero-worship, or whatever it was. All for Naismith. For Naismith, and not for me… never for me…

Meanwhile, the actual Miles: *Has the same thought process whenever he has to be Lord Vorkosigan.* Once again, if Mark hadn't been QUITE so caught up in the sibling rivalry, they'd have a LOT to bond over at this point. Which is part of the tragedy of this all.

Page 4:

… See Miles. See Miles run. See Miles get what he deserves.

I mean, as this is a reread… if your plan had gone off without a hitch, Mark, this would be pretty damn near Milesian Shenanigans, yeah. Miles would definitely deserve someone pulling those on him. But Milesian Shenanigans are dangerous even for experienced Vorkosigans, and you are not yet an Experienced Vorkosigan in the art of schemes and shenanigans. For a start, you don't yet realize how much the covert raid and abduction is NOT your style of scheme.

Page 6:

He could always tell, instantly, when someone he met thought they were facing “Naismith.” They all had that same stupid hyper-alert glow in their faces. They weren’t all worshipful; he’d met some of Naismith’s enemies once, but worshipful or homicidal, they reacted. As if they suddenly switched on, and became ten times more alive than ever before. How the hell did he do it? Make people light up like that? Granted, Naismith was a goddamn hyperactive, but how did he make it so freaking contagious?

… You know, Mark, when you put it that way, I guess the whole “start a cult of personality to stage a mass prison escape” thing isn’t all that unusual for Miles and is… basically what he did with the Dendarii, pretty much. Schemes so harebrained he forces you to start thinking like him just to keep up, and then you are unfortunately Thinking Like Miles Naismith Vorkosigan. A very dangerous habit.