#not a fan of her but the pressure must've been so hard on her

[joesalw]

I think the reason why in pretty much all of her controversies Taylor has preferred to remain silent is that she hates being put on the spot, hates not being in control of the entire situation. She's been pretty open always about being a control freak and being very iron gripped with her public persona at least, and I also think any outside pressure no matter the situation makes her act like a spiteful child. Its probably why shes doubled down on not saying anything to acknowledge Anas death in Brazil, too many people are asking her to and she's throwing a fit.

Think "oh you want me to talk about x thing? you all keep talking about it and constantly riding me to say something? well guess what, now I'm not saying anything, I'll just pretend it doesn't exist." she did that back in 2020 when she left Tumblr, because black fans were begging her to say literally anything about the blm protests or just in general voice support for the black communities in America but she didn't like the pressure and just silently ghosted and still lets those fans get treated like shit to this day because other white fans usually say shit like oh they drove her off tumblr they harassed her.

She's so embarrassingly petulant for a 34 year old woman. Teens can get away with shitty attitudes because they're still growing up, she's been grown for a while so it's just sad as hell honestly that she can't work past that but tbh what incentive does she have to do so? Even when she acts like an asshole there's still millions of people lining up to throw hundreds and thousands of their dollars at her, her tours are still packed, her music still sells. There's zero practical reason for her to change her behavior, plus I'm sure she surrounds herself with yes men so she never feels challenged in any of her decisions. So I don't think she'll ever change, I don't think she'd ever pursue it unless it was to win back public favor in the event she did something that would actually impact her brand.

I'm sure it was jarring as hell for Joe to realize who he was really standing next to, because that just doesn't mesh at all with what he's shown of his personality and how he is. Like must've been such a betrayal to be with someone for years but slowly recognize that they're actually fuckin nuts and do not care about publicly smearing others, making shady moves to ruin other people's careers (that Kate person from big machine who lost our on being featured on the hunger games soundtrack because Taylor just couldn't stand not being the only female artist for example + the Olivia Rodrigo thing) and acting like regina george in mean girls with her model squad. Not to mention she just doesn't care about being close friends with racists, working with rapists, being friends with someone who admitted to molesting their sister (Lena Dunham), the list goes on.

Taylor is the perfect example of how ridiculous it is that we really expect anything from celebrities especially in the US, they're morally bankrupt and do not give a fuck about the common person. If you've got leagues of braindead consumers on your side you could get away with murder, it's why I don't participate in any celebrity worship or stan culture, you can't use people like that as moral guideposts because they don't even have morals to begin with. If she did, Taylor would've been in contact with Anas family immediately at the very least, would've offered her condolences to her family, literally anything to show she felt real human emotion and grief at her passing. But she hasn't, so it's just another example of her absolutely mind blowing selfishness and narcissism.

You spilled so hard anon👏 Spot on👏

[kraekat29]

Ruby shook her head, shaking from head to toe. It didn't help that Rafe's ceiling fan was on, causing Ruby's nipples to harden further (as if she weren't turned on already).

Rafe's hand slid down, undoing the button on Ruby's jeans. "God, I can't believe I ever let you get away. Rue, your skin is still so pretty... and these perky tits, God." He swallowed hard, eyeing them.

"'S gonna be hard to hold back on you, pretty. Hope JJ knows that it's nothing personal that I fucked his girl's pussy and she let me."

Ruby clenched her jaw, wanting nothing more than to knee him in the jaw as he tugged her jeans down. "And she's dripping, just for me? You're still the same slut you used to be, huh, Rue?"

Ruby bit her lip as Rafe tucked his knuckles into the waistband of her panties. "Be a shame if I ripped these, too, yeah?"

They were a gift from JJ. Fancy lingerie that she'd worn on his birthday. "Rafe, please, don't--"

Rafe ripped the seam with a hard tug, grinning maliciously. "Bet they were a gift from poor JJ." He reached up, shoving the panties into her mouth. "You can keep them, Rue, don't worry."

Ruby gagged, coughing at the taste on her tongue. Rafe lined his hard cock up with Ruby's entrance. "God, can't wait to feel this pretty pussy again. Huh, Rue? Ready for me to split you open on my cock?"

Eyes full of tears, Ruby shook her head, her speech garbled.

"Yeah, you are," Rafe answered for her, shoving his cock in up to the hilt. Ruby let out a strangled moan, her back arching up off the bed as Rafe filled her to the brim. "So fuckin' tight, Rue. JJ doesn't fuck you at all, does he?" Rafe asked, gripping Ruby's hips so tightly she was sure they'd bruise-- but that must've been what Rafe meant by 'mark you with my hands'.

He set a steady pace, absolutely brutal with the snapping of his hips. His headboard bounced off the wall with every deep stroke, paired with a moan from Ruby.

"Sound like a damn pornstar, Rue," Rafe grunted, his pelvis hitting her's harshly as Ruby choked on her panties. "So fuckin' hot, jus' like you used to be, huh?"

Ruby clenched around him and Rafe moaned, throwing his head back. "Shit, Rue, like a damn virgin."

Rafe reached down to thumb at Ruby's clit, seemingly wanting her to clench around him again. She obliged, wanting to see JJ as soon as possible.

"God, Rue. Always know just how to make me cum, huh?" Rafe grunted, clenching his jaw as stars danced behind Ruby's eyes. Rafe slammed into her a few more times, hitting the spongey spot inside Ruby that make her eyes roll back in her head as she came, clenching hard around him. Rafe's cock swelled inside her and he tightened his grip on her hips, cumming with a groan. The headboard hit the wall once more, surely leaving marks, and Rafe panted, coming down from his high.

"Still such a good little slut, huh?" Rafe asked, leaning up and pulling the panties out of her mouth. "Answer me." He slapped her cheek harshly. "Aren't you a good little slut, Ruby?"

"Uh huh," Ruby moaned weakly, her eyes closed and her wrists burning.

"Bet you just wanna see JJ, isn't that right?" Rafe smirked. "That's why you let me give you the best orgasm you've ever had in your life."

Ruby shook her head weakly. "Not th' best."

Rafe raised his eyebrows. "Oh, it wasn't?" He asked, resting his hand on Ruby's throat and applying the barest amount of pressure, cutting off the little air she was receiving. "Bet you're gonna tell me JJ did that for you."

"He di--" Rafe squeezed Ruby's throat and she choked on her words, tears forming in her eyes again.

"Did he?"

Ruby shook her head.

🫢 let’s be honest tho, JJ definitely did give her the best orgasm of her life😂 A+++

[k-indie]

NSFW

Various x Reader (might be inaccurate at the naming) minor non-con perhaps

For some reason, you hated your neighbor. Perhaps it was the way he always used you for your handy skills, asking you for help around his house even though he could do all of the work by himself. But how could he refuse his hot neighbor when he watched her sweaty body glistening in the sun whenever she was working on her car, mowing her lawn, and even babysitting her other neighbors kids and chasing them around the yard with water guns or water balloons?

He wanted you.

He wanted you so bad he could taste you.

Now, he wasn't the type to openly admit any and everything, he had a funny way of leading you to the conclusion and whether you accepted or not was not his problem. In fact, he preferred it that way so he could tease you when you would accuse him of something he all but insinuated.

He was a headache and regardless of the cool-headed act he put up around whether it was just his personality or not, it always left you frustrated. He was a whirlwind of a man and you tried to steer clear of his ship as much as possible.

But when he noticed such a pull back from you, it only left him the necessary space to think of things to get you into his grasp again. So, then the tinkering started to happen. First, he started with asking you for certain household items that he would keep for a couple of days just to return it to see your smile and a small thanks to him. Then it was ingredients, small things like eggs, sugar, the occasional request for hot sauce. Don't ask.

Lastly, he started asking you to take a look at his car, his ceiling fans, his sinks. The one time he took you to look at the sink in his master bath, you almost never returned again because he was so flippant with how your ass looks so delectable bent for him like that, and you knew he knew you could hear him when he mumbled it, but you didn't know he was taking pictures secretly. Either way, you ignored the comment, finished the job, and left his home without another word.

And you'd finally had some peace for about four days before he decided to pester you about his kitchen sink. He saw you outside, sunbathing in a short, skin tight sundress in your backyard before he was ogling your entire body and practically drooling at the sight. He licked his lips when he leaned over his fence and whistled, "Hey, neighbor. I got a super leaky sink and I don't know what I'm supposed to do. Do you mind helping me?"

"YouTube."

And he grumbled to himself under his breath, cursing your immediate and curt response, "I tried that. The videos didn't help any."

You went through a list of other ways to fix a leaky sink and he said he'd tried it all, and begged you to help him with a pout, and you knew there'd be no way out of it unless you agreed to his evil plan and helped him with his sink yourself. Otherwise, there'd be no way you'd get the R and R you deserved.

"Fine. I'm coming reluctantly, neighbor~" You grunted before pushing your sunglass up and crossing from your backyard, to his front yard, and meeting his eager self at his front door. "Come on in. Kitchen's just this way."

You huffed through your nose and kissed your teeth, hoping he knew how inconvenient this was for you. But he didn't care at all.

--

You were too busy changing the pipe you figured he must've tampered with to notice the skirt of your dress was riding up and revealing your pretty ass to him, covered in a very thin, white lace material. He must've been dreaming or died and went to heaven because the sight of your underwear contrasting with your skin sent shivers down his spine and blood rushing to his dick, and he knew he wouldn't be able to last much longer not having a piece of you to take to the grave with him.

So, when you felt the pressure of the cabinet underneath the sink on your side, and the inability to pull yourself out of the hard place, you groaned at the man behind you, his hands palming at your ass with his knee holding the door against your body. "I swear to the powers that be, if you don't st-" whack.

You tried to hold back the moan erupting in your throat at the feeling of the slap, halting your thoughts and your speech, but he heard the small squeak your lips made a mistake of holding onto.

"You have no idea how much I've wanted you ever since you moved in next door, gorgeous."

He slapped your ass again, your dress hiked up further now and your panties on full display. He rubbed your ass cheeks in tandem with his slow grinding against your cunt, hips jolting into yours to make your hips flex against the door of the cabinet and the threshold.

"You fucking perv... Stop-"

And another slap landed on your thigh this time, halting your speech once more and you started to wonder if he'd slap you every time you spoke. You let out a full moan this time, silently cursing yourself for the action but thankful he couldn't see the lewd faces you were making due to the rough treatment he was carelessly throwing your way.

"I've wanted to touch you for so long but I can't fucking wait anymore... I'm tired of waiting for you, I have to have you now."

No other words were spoken when he pulled your panties down and pushed his fingers against your slit, rubbing downwards and hovering at the spot just beneath your salivated pearl, rubbing small spots in place before letting your voice ring in his ears and he was quick to attack your nub with ferocity. Fingers dancing hectically against your clit, his mouth watered at the sight of your pussy clenching around nothing while he fingered you like this, underneath his sink and locked between his cabinet and the door and his leg.

"Fuck... princess, you're so fucking wet."

He was quick to take one hand off your body, sitting on your thigh and holding one of your lips apart, using it to unzip his jeans and pull them down halfway along with his boxers, fisting his cock with it pointed directly at your sopping slit.

"Whatever you're planning on doing, don't."

Your voice was shaky, betraying your attempt to assert dominance in your bent and trapped form. You needed to feel something but you also didn't want the friction to come from him. Did you?

"Shh, I'll take care of you. I'll be gentle, baby."

You knew that when a man wanted you as much as the one hovering behind you did --tip threatening to dive deep into your waters-- any of his promises of not going feral on you, his primal instincts vowed to be locked away somewhere deep inside of him, he was lying. But this man never failed to surprise you with his unpredictable moves.

You wouldn't be surprised if you did, however, find those pictures he'd snapped of your bare pussy mailed to you or pinned to his wall in his bedroom either, you'd heard the snap of the polaroid camera this time and you figured he'd taken more. Nothing you could do about it trapped under his sink now.

This man was obsessed with the vagina and the womb, and you were surprised when he actually did go slow, entering your pussy with a slow squelching sound resonating too loud for your liking in the darkness of the cabinet. Your attempts to escape were futile, and you'd stopped long ago when he had laid the first slap on your ass, but you still tried again this time, not even thinking about the way you mindlessly pushed yourself back against him until you felt his cock sliding into you even deeper, pushing so deliciously against your cervix and you jolted forward, pussy clenching on his tip when the sensation took you by surprise.

He groaned at your attempt to hide yourself further away from him in his cabinet, and he pushed the door even harder now against your hips, digging into the bones before he was pulling back, one hand bracing the supple flesh where you thigh met your ass and the other supporting his knee at the top of the cabinet, keeping you in place.

His snaps backed into yours, repeatedly pounding into you and impaling your cervix with every thrust. Your screams of pleasure and whines for him to stop or go slower fell on deaf ears-- all he heard was, "daddy, more" with every scream that left your lips even if it wasn't what you were saying.

He loved fucking his sweet neighbors tiny, wet cunt underneath his sink, so much that when you squirted on his long, veiny, slightly thick cock, he couldn't help but to rail you even faster, letting his cum spurt in long strings into you, pushing it all into your cunt, as much as he could and never letting up even when you were babbling about how good it felt and were spent on the floor of the cupboard.

He released the hold of the door in favor of pulling back and you with him, and pushing your chest to his wooden kitchen floor and pulling your hands behind your back. "I'm so fucking glad you're my neighbor... sweet, tight cunt milking me so fucking good..."

You were too tired to offer a rebuttal, eyes rolling back in your head as you came once more, hips rolling in small circles against his as you moaned breathily and started chanting his name lightly, your orgasm being snatched right out effortlessly with every delicious dip of his tip into your cervix.

"My perfect little neighbor..."

GOJO | Toji | Ran | Geto | Kazutora | Kisaki | Hanma | Kuroo ? | Uzui maybe ? | Michael Jackson KnY| Kyoraku-taichou | Kenpachi to some degree | Izana | Manjiro |

[edwinas]

(I'm the one that answered that ask about Charithra and episode 6 from my sideblog) I didn't get around to listen to the podcast interview yet but regarding some points that Charithra has said, many fans REALLY didn't understand the point about her being treated like a baby to the point where it felt stifling (some were even mocking towards it) but it made perfect sense because in the first real conversation she and Kate have after the almost wedding, Kate makes a comment about how Edwina's innocence has shielded her because she doesn't have to know about the full hardships someone like Kate does or has gone through, and this is specifically what made Kate not want to tell her about her and Anthony because she didn't want to hurt Edwina's feelings, whereas that very decision ended up angering her because she wasn't given the full truth. She's not really given the freedom to make her own choice about her own wedding while knowing everything beforehand and that's obviously the stifling part. And about her being possibly more self-centered, I agree more with your point about Edwina having to make her own sacrifices because sure, while she hasn't had the life Kate has had, Edwina's had to work twice as hard to know how to behave like the perfect potential bride. Everything she does before Anthony and his family is in a way an act she's had to perfect, and considering how she knows about Mary's own scandal in the ton and how they still remember it, her role as the diamond was even more constraining because she had to be perfect in order for society to "forgive" her mother's previous "error". Edwina's reputation and status is in the first half of S2 her only goal in life because she knows she's not just representing herself, but also her family and Kate's own attempt at making her be the best out of all the young ladies. That's why she breaks down in episode 3 when Anthony doesn't propose because up until now she's been told that the way she behaves would guarantee a proposal, but it hasn't, which means she must've made a mistake that she cannot afford. Also, while she may not know about her family being penniless by this point, it's obvious that she understands how significant her goal is in securing a husband because that's what she's been working for for 8 whole years. Also small sidenote: one of the most baffling complaints about Edwina is her not defending Kate from Anthony when she finds out about Dorset in episode 2. Like people went wild saying Edwina doesn't care for Kate because of this but it's literally in the scene that Edwina is struggling with what to do or say because a) she's supposed to be a proper lady and not in any way say anything against a gentleman, especially one of such a high rank because her reputation is still not properly secured, and b) Anthony here still has the bigger advantage because of his status, and exactly how can Edwina fight him over his insult towards Kate when her own title isn't even a sure one, given how Mary's parents disowned her.

All of this, Edwina being infantilised meant she wasn't told crucial info about her own future. It wasn't just her having an easy life and no hardships ever. Like if she hadn't seen Kthony's feelings for each other at the altar, she would have been saddled for life to a man who would never love her and cheat.

Charithra said being the baby was stifling also because Edwina had to be submissive. Being conditioned to be the perfect debutante meant suppressing her true self and holding herself to the highest of standards. Edwina was under tremendous pressure as “the face” of her family and the diamond of the season. Her actions were scrutinised by the ton and she had the chance to change her family’s tarnished reputation or at least take the focus away from Mary’s scandal. As you said, she was raised to believe being perfect led to marriage so not being proposed to meant she wasn’t perfect. So I don’t agree that Edwina cruised through life carefree. 

Charithra’s saying another of Edwina’s shortcomings is her not actively taking part in her family’s affairs but I'm not sure how that would have worked? She was 18 in s2, she wouldn’t have had much of a say as a little girl in regency era when grown women have little agency. Maybe she could have contributed to family discussions or even made Kate feel less alone?

LITERALLY, why was Edwina so criticised?? There were 2 posts reprimanding Anthony who said it. Yep, too much was at stake for Edwina and Kate or maybe Edwina was simply speechless. Not everyone's default is self-righteous rants when a loved one is wronged and Kate is more than capable of defending herself. Doesn’t automatically make Edwina a terrible sister...

(You get the weirdest asks btw. People pointing out bigotry against Charithra because of a podcast that came out two days ago, doesn’t mean they condone racism against Simone?? It’s obvious these fans don’t care about either actress, just that their fave is the most victimised which retroactively “justifies” them harassing the other 😑)

[all-about-seggs]

Ardent Affections :

Pairing : Timeskip + Virgin! Sakusa Kiyoomi x Female reader

Rating : 18+, Explicit

Word count : 3k

Warnings : Smut and fluff (and holy shit I ended up including a bit of angst) , Loss of virginity, blow job, fingering, vaginal sex, established relationships.

A/n: I prefer dirtier side of Smuts but this was as far as I could go with Saku sooooo I hope my fluffy smut isn't cringey >.<.

Putting the plum filled onigiri in the clean plastic container, you give it another look over to make sure it's tidy enough, afterall, the person you made this for was nothing if not picky. But, you also knew he loved umeboshi, so after a few successful weeks of your relationship with Sakusa, you went ahead and bought more than enough dried plums to practice making something he won't be able to refuse. It didn't take long to reach the gym he was practicing at, with lunch time approaching, he'd be on his break too, giving you the perfect chance to have some alone time.

One would think, that no boyfriend would refuse their significant other's cooking but falling in love with him as well as dating him made you realise it wasn't the status quo. He was, at the very least, peculiar. Always on his own, Sakusa never felt the need to be involved with a lot of people, ironical as it may be for someone who played a team sport, his idiosyncrasies made it hard for most people to get close to him. That's why the sight of a cluster of high shool girls flocking your boyfriend, to give him their handmade goods was comical yet unsettling.

It wasn't something you got jealous at, but it's something that made you second guess yourself instead, whenever the thought of making him something pooped in your head, this same scene played infront of your eyes. Sakusa surrounded by a bunch of girls with heart eyes, wanting to give him stuff. On the verge of losing his polite demeanor, Sakusa almost gave them a taste of his blunt indifference if it weren't for some faculty member intervening. Today was the same.

With the perfect excuse, he pulled himself away from the group and sauntered towards you, eye twitching with a look that screamed ' I saw you having fun on my expense'. You quickly pulled yourself out of the gloomy thoughts and greeted him with your regular smile.

" I didn't wanted to disturb your fan meet", the cheeky tone in your voice added to his annoyance.

" I assure you that you didn't, besides you know I don't like hand made stuff ", he grumbled, voice carrying the regular icky note you were used to but it caused the dull ache in your heart grew. Before you could answer, you saw Bokuto running towards your direction, making you jump with his boisterous greeting,

" HEY! Y/n chan!... Are you gonna join us for lunch as well ?", The look in his face was as cute as his voice which was cutoff by Sakusa's cold one,

" No. I don't like the places you go to eat. Also, I'm done for today so we have no reason to stay.", Curt and to the point, Sakusa answered him and gestured you with his eyes to follow him instead.

" Geez, it's like he can never let loose!, Y/n chan! You should ask him to open up more!", pouting, the energetic male glared at Sakusa's retreating form.

"Ummm, Sorry Bokuto! He still doesn't know how to..... People? I guess? But he's trying! I know he is! So don't worry... We'll catch up with you guys sometime else okay?", With a slight bow, you trailed after your boyfriend, leaving a deflated Bokuto behind.

As you walked behind him, you thought about the first time the both of you met, he didn't even looked at you properly before leaving just like he was right now, about how you had to put your feelings out in the open first so that he'd finally notice them, how, for the last few days your garbage can only had dozens of messed up onigiri, and how the lunch you packed was getting colder by the minute as it layed still in your bag.

You were lost in thought for the rest of the way, he wasn't one to talk much but your constant silence was not something that often happened. Still not being used to initiating small talks, all he could do was gaze at the dazed look on your face.

The two of you made your way back to his apartment that the sports facility provided the players. You had been here a couple of times before but never long enough to actually call it 'staying over'.

" Why are we at your place?", You quietly ask, making him pause before speaking.

" I did say I was done with practice for the day", opening the front door he ushered you in. It was unsurprisingly neat, the entrance not having any useless items, infact everything in his place had a purpose or use.

It was a big step, him letting anyone in his personal space, considering his high maintenance personality you thought he'd dip you in a bucket of sanitizer everyday but he was a lot more chill when you both take your respective baths. He still goes in first.

The moment you stepped outside the bathroom, you saw a nervous looking Sakusa was sitting on the edge of his bed.

" Did you really wanted to have lunch with those guys?", His abrupt question caught you off guard, so apparently he took your silencein the wrong way, but it still warmed your heart to know he noticed and cared enough to talk about it, albeit clumsily.

" Is that why you think I was quite on our way here?", The reply you gave made him avert his eyes, whether it was out of embarrassment or the awkwardness in the room, it didn't change the fact that your sudden change in behaviour was noted by your boyfriend.

" If you have something to say, then I want you to tell me, I'm afraid I won't know otherwise", Sakusa added, finally looking at you with his deadpan yet sharp look.

He was right, every couple needs to have proper communication in order for their relationship to succeed, so with that in mind you decided to tell him about what's bothering you.

Walking over to his side, you sat next to him,

" I made you lunch today, but when I saw you rejecting your fans gifts saying you don't like handmade stuff, it- bothered me.", Your reasoning might've been a little selfish, it's not like you wanted to force anything on him just because you were his girlfriend but the fear of getting rejected always made you hold back on so many things.

" So I didn't give it to you, and then I just started having a trail of depressing thoughts about how maybe I'm the only one who wants anything from this relationship, I mean we haven't even done anything more than kissing Kiyoomi.", To you, this confession was nothing more than the frustrations you've built up. He was silently listening as you went on, not interrupting until you were done.

" I see....", His soft baritone was laced I'm regret as he brought his hands to you head, gently combing the strands, " I'm sorry, I made you feel that way, it's obvious that both of us need to work on our communication skills but there is one thing you got wrong", saying that, his hand combing you hair pushed you forward until you were right in front of his glossy lips,

" It should go without saying that I wouldn't let you in here if I didn't loved you, and you wouldn't be in this bed either if I didn't wanted you.", By the end of his sentence, his hot mouth covered your in a demonically passionate kiss which was all teeth and tongue. It was probably your longest kiss as well, making you grip his shoulders so hard it would've probably left marks if it weren't for his taut musculature. You pressed you hands on his sculpted chest, feeling his nipples harden as you slowly run you thumbs over them. Sakusa pulled away from you to catch a few breaths, his lips shining with your mixed saliva.

" I've never done this before......", hesitation crossed his eyes which soon melted into a look of determination as he brought his face near yours.

"But if it's with you, I know I'll like it", he panted, pulling you on his lap to continue his ministrations from a more closer proximity. The uncharacteristically deep kiss encouraged your hands to roam around more, to feel all of his ripped form through the fabric of his thin shirt. Your hand grazed his crotch, this contact alone was enough to make him twitch, his virginity showing, the blush on his cheeks spreaded all the way to his neck.

The front of his shorts looked so strained,It was painfully clear how much his cock was begging for attention, so you pushed Sakusa back until he was lying flat on the bed, feet still on the floor. Searching his eyes for any objections, you pulled his waistband down to reveal his bulging member. It suited a big guy like him, his thick cock felt so hot and heavy in you hand it took everything in you to stop yourself from jumping on it right away.

" Hggg... Wait... It's-", his voiced carried more embarrassment than discomfort but you stopped nonetheless.

" Dirty?.....is that what you want to say?", questioningly, you looked at him from between his legs as he nodded.

" Well sex is better dirty but, I'll try not to make a mess okay?", With a wink you grabbed his shaft with one hand and took his tip in your mouth. The warm, wet insides of your mouth touching the sensitive head of his cock made him shudder in pleasure but he didn't make more than a hum. Maybe your boyfriend was still embarrassed but now that you finally get to go down on him, you made it a personal goal to hear his moans.

Detemined to hear his beautiful whimpers, you added pressure on his member through your tongue as you moved your lips up and down, swallowing him as much as you could. Droll dripping from the side of your mouth and his precum gave you enough lubrication to increase you pace, going harder and harder until you felt your teeth make contact with his sensitive shaft, that must've hurt, you thought but atleast it got a reaction out of him.

" AH-.....mmmhh Y/n damnit.....you're doing it too roughly", you heard him complain from above you,

" I just rough housed you a little..... Anyway, you can't blame a girl who's been abstaining herself from fucking her hot boyfriend ", with a pop you pulled him out of your mouth and looked up at the wide eyed Sakusa with an uncharacteristic boldness that even surprised you. Maybe it was because of the situation or because you two had a heart to heart conversation about your feelings just now but you felt oddly comfortable with him more than you ever did before. You knew he loved you enough to put up with anything you'd throw at him at his point, so why not push your luck?

"......well aren't you a vulgar little girl", regaining his composure, Sakusa propped himself on his elbows to give you his trademark deadpan look. You squeeze his balls teasingly in an attempt to rile him up further, his face contorts a little before he shoots you a glare.

" I'm going to make you regret that", with nothing more than a growl he grabbed your hand to make lie face down beside him, for a second you thought he'd spank you, but the moment you raised you head from the mattress to see what's going on, a big hand was on your head pushing your face down again, his other hand ghosting over the hem of your t-shirt.

" It's my turn now, so you better behave", emphasizing the behave he first pulled your shirt off of your shoulders, then swiftly getting rid of your pants. This was an interesting turn of event, just a moment ago your virgin boyfriend was squirming like a pathetic little boy but with just a little teasing made him switch into daddy mode, you'd be lying if you said it wasn't thrilling.

You laid there stark naked as you heard a few rustling sounds coming from behind, indicating Sakusa taking his cloths off. His long, deft fingers grabbed your hips, raising them a slightly off the surface of the mattress, the digits of his right hand crept near your dripping core as if wondering if he should touch you or not, you moved your hips closer so you could feel his touch but he retreated his hand, only to pinch one of your butt cheek. The tease.

" If you're expecting me to eat you out too then keep dreaming..... but since I made you wait so long, I'll give you something else today", his matter of fact tone was even as he traced two long fingers up your slit taking in all of your juices, he pushed them inside your aching pussy. His thick digits rubbing your walls made you moan in the pillow, with his thumb he started rubbing your engorged clit. His actions were not exactly gentle but you didn't wanted them to be either, you wanted him to pound you into the mattress so bad but maybe it was asking too much from someone inexperienced.

" You like this right?", It wasn't exactly a question, as his increased his speed, with his free hand he pinched your ass again leaving small red marks in the fleshy patch of skin. Your first orgasm in so many weeks approached you with an intense force, making you buck you hips in Sakusa's hand. Just as your pussy started clenching around the fingers that was inside it, he withdrew his hand leaving you with a strange sense of emptiness.

" Not so fast y/n, it's more efficient it we cum together, besides I know you want more than just my fingers", his voice carrying the cockiness of someone far more experienced but you can't complain, for both his actions and words were easily bringing you closer to the edge. Ignoring the stickiness of his fingers he lightly massaged your butt cheeks before kneeling right behind them. The sight of your flushed, naked body was enough to get him going, something that he dare not admit.

From the corner of your eye, you saw him opening his bedside drawer to retrieve a condom. Well, atleast one of you were prepared for this, just as he finished putting on the thin protection, he asked you,

" I'm putting it in y/n", he didn't make it sound like a question but it wasn't until you nodded in approval, that he moved. Groaning lightly, Sakusa entered you inch by inch, making the process as slow as possible so could clearly feel the delicious stretch his thick cock provided. You were already panting by the time he bottomed out in you, as he started moving his hips you rolled yours to match his pace, creating a steady rhythm.

Both your pants and body were in sync, building up pleasure that soon reached its peak, the roll of your hips and the sound of his name from your mouth urged him to take a hold of your hips and drive his pulsating member further into your cunt. He felt your walls clenching around him when your body experienced the well awaited orgasm, quivering beneath him like. The sudden pressure added on to his cock made your boyfriend follow right after. The both of you were still riding your high when he lowered his torso on to your back, sweat slicked bodies on top of each other, you wondered what kind of face he would be making right about now. Hoping it wasn't one of disgust, you turned your face to the side, his endearing curls tickling your ears as he kept his nose buried in the nape of your neck.

There was a serene quality to the room where the two of you laid still until Sakusa got up abruptly, you knew that it was bath time even before he uttered anything.

" Let's eat", his soft voice seemed almost like a whisper which was confusing and astonishing at the same time when he tossed one towel to you and quickly wiped himself with the other.

Making quick work of the cleaning, you both went to the living room where you pulled out the bento box from your bag. It felt cold against your hand but this time it didn't make you sad because now you were sure that the person next to you wouldn't reject it.

Opening the box, you noticed they got a little crushed, probably because of you tossing your bag aside dejectedly when you first arrived, the previously well made onigiri lost their original shape but you hoped they tasted the same.

Gingerly showing him the box you thought about quickly explaining it's condition and telling him about how you made it in the most hygienic way possible for a human but the words died in your mouth when Sakusa briskly took one piece out and munched on the distorted rice ball. You watched him chew, waiting became too nerve-racking so you blurted, " How is it Kiyoomi?!", Talk about putting pressure on a guy but it didn't deter him from telling you the truth.

" It's good", the simple reply he gave was the best, you thought, his words were never grandiose, just to the point that's what made you believe them everytime he decides to be honest with you.

"Next time...", He mumbled in between his increasing breaths and tinted cheeks,"Lets make it together".

[eagles-translated]

In the trailer, Elias tells Amie “if you go and I end up here, then I’ll break.” While initially it sounded sweet or a sign of Elias trying to be more vulnerable and share his feelings (which is probably his intention), the more I have watched the trailer, the statement seems a bit unintentionally emotionally manipulative or codependent. Did he think about how hearing that would make Amie feel? Obviously bad and like she is responsible for his breakdown if she decides to go to US without any him smh. Even in season 2 when his dad told him about his shot to go to US, Klara told him to go and not worry about her. Just was wondering your thoughts as I find the statement a bit unsettling.

I also thought that line was worrying. I'm just worried overall for what Elias will go through this season, and I hope he won't become dependent on Amie like how Felicia became dependent on Ludde (but it's very likely).

The original line in Swedish "[...] då går jag sönder", meaning "[...] then I'll break", could also translate into falling apart or to be split into pieces. Elias is saying that not only will he be destroyed, but he's also hinting that he won't be able to be pieced back together again.

It's a really dramatic line that sounds romantic at first, but when you go deeper it's definitely alarming. Elias and Amie still haven't been together for that long at this point. When Elias dated Klara he never said anything unsettling like this, so I'm very sure that Elias isn't going to be in a good headspace when he says this.

Elias is going to struggle with eating, with training, and get kicked off the team. He's going to ignore his issues and run from his problems. And when he's confronted with the reality that things aren't going his way—that he worked so hard to reach his hockey dreams only to be kicked off the team—he will feel like he's lost everything besides Amie.

It's very likely that he will treat Amie as a comfort pillar and see her as one of the few good things in his life. I can see Elias feeling like if he lost her, then there wouldn't be anything left. So considering this, Amie leaving for the US might be an even bigger issue for Elias than we thought.

He got drafted to the US and probably felt like a failure and an embarrassment when it didn't work out. There is so much pressure on him because he's a Kroon, so I can only imagine how he must have felt returning to Oskarshamn to play in a declining club. He must've gotten ridiculed by hockey fans and that only worsened with the tabloids writing that Mats paid for Elias to move up in the rankings. His career might be over after this whole mess, and Elias just keeps overworking to convince himself that he can still turn things around.

His worst nightmare would probably be to see the person he's in love with go to the US without him. Elias might feel that he's not "good enough" to be playing in the US and that he might be abandoned because of it. He wants to go to the US and he wants to go there with the person he loves. That's my understanding of it, at least.

I hope Elias will get these demons out of his head and that he won't ruin any relationships because of them. As I've said before, I would be heartbroken if Elias ended up in Oskarshamn. I really can't see him staying there after graduation.

[watchinglikeafangirl]

Lovely Writer episode 9 - analysis

Since I need to distract myself from the exam tomorrow, I figured, I would interest you in a new Lovely Writer analysis because oh boy did much happen yesterday... Gene and Nubsib took things next level again, Aoey showed his true colors and thankfully we didn't see very much of the director because I wanna punch him so badly.

Aoey

This whole episode starts with Aoey more or less inviting Gene to spend time with him. I think the tension and uncormfortness Gene feels is well portrayed here. Aoey is in a bar which doesn't seem to have any windows which already makes us feel imprisoned. Even though the color scheme focusses on earth tones, which are normally very calming, all those light bulbs in the background mixed with Aoey's clothes, all in one color only, make this scene even more uncomforting. Aoey seems dangerous only wearing a neutral color because nothing of his personality shines through and we fear he holds back because it's ugly. This whole scenery seems to scream "Gene doesn't want to be here".

Then, Aoey starts to talk and we know why we feel like this. The tension is extremely uncomfortable and I cringed about it - not in a negative way - because I was so scared what Aoey was going to do. This scene underlines one more time that Aoey feels unloved and unworthy of love.

Stop loving Nubsib. Love me. I'm cute too.

It gets more precise when Aoey talks to Mhok and rejects him not because he doesn't like him back but because he hates himself so much. He feels pathetic. He feels worthless. He has very low self-esteem and messes things up to make people hate him. He is his own enemy. Mhok doesn't know what to do, doesn't know how to help him emotionally because Aoey pushes him away. At the same time, Aoey is thankful for Gene not hating him even though Gene has every reason to. Gene is someone he hangs on to, like Gene is his redemption. But Aoey will never reach redemption if he continues to do stuff to convince people otherwise. His character is very dark and lonely and lost.

Gene and Nubsib

They take two next steps this episode. First, they have their first time and second, they tell their parents about the relationship.

First of all, their first time has a weird aftertaste. I believe Gene wanted to do it with Nubsib for some time now but wasn't quite ready and now felt the pressure of "getting it over with" because he thought Nubsib took viagra. It's not like he doesn't love Nubsib or anything, but I feel like he wasn't entirely ready and forced himself a bit. Nubsib, thankfully, felt this vibe too and even asks him about it but there's nothing more he can do than ask and if Gene says he's fine, then Nubsib can only believe him. When Gene discovers Nubsib actually didn't take any viagra, he's a bit shocked. This raises the question in me if he really wanted it. But well, he doesn't exactlu panic about it, so maybe he really was very sure in this moment.

What I definetely didn't see coming was their outing. I thought it would take a while but well, okay, if they are ready, why not? I like the way Gene has changed since he and Nubsib got together. When something is on his mind, he says it. It bothers him their parents don't know about them and he tells Nubsib. They talk about this decision and once Gene is sure, Nubsib just rolls with it reassuring Gene he doesn't have to step out of his comfort zone if he doesn't feel like it.

This dinner was the most awkward dinner I have ever seen and it must've been horrible for Gene and Nubsib to just sit there and listen to the jokes about them being together which already implied it wouldn't be fine if it were true. These jokes last for a few minutes and the mothers talk about the popularity of BLs whilst Gene's father looks very scary. I can literally taste the awkwardness and how uncomfortable they both are.

For these few minutes, when the parents were just joking, I feared Gene wouldn't go through with it because he was usually the kind of guy to back off when such things happened, but not right now.

What if the two of us are really together?

The mood switches from casually joking to extremely serious. This outing and the following make their relationship far more serious and real than before. They don't touch each other like crazy when they are together because it wouldn't've fit with the characters at all. And it's totally right Nubsib only adds an explanation to Gene's question/outing in a verbal way. They still don't touch because they are both overwhelmed by the negative feelings they are faceing. Only when no one says anything, Nubsib takes Gene's hand to comfort both of them and this small touch was all that was needed. They didn't need to hug or even kiss. They also didn't need to make a scene out of it. Them staying in silence hurts even more because it feels so damn realistic. In other BLs, the couple mostly storms off angrily but that's not how you treat your parents. You discuss the matter and talk properly about it or at least give them time to answer no matter what it may be. Here, all of this happens and no one storms off to leave even more awkward silence. It was just as painful as it would be in reality.

BL fans

What makes the dinner even more awkward is the talk between the two mothers about BLs. The way they talk about it makes obvious they like to see it on screen because it's not happening in their real life. They have a distance to it and it's also a huge critic to all those female watchers feteshizing these relationships. They like the kissing and hugging but never reflect on it and ask the question what they would do if they would know someone with any other sexuality than heterosexual. They don't accept it at all when it comes to their sons. What they worshipped is now disgusting and nothing they "can understand". (This sentence "I don't understand it" freaks me out everytime shows pull that because what is there to not understand about love? It just doesn't add up to me what is so not understandable about two people loving and deeply caring about each other.)

Family's reaction

Gene knew his father would not approve because he's a self-hated bisexual and his mother just never raises her voice. In general, the relationship of the parents looks distant. The mother never says anything for her own sake and just exists under the fathers approval. The father loves to have control and now has to learn the hard way gender stereotyping doesn't exist like this any more. Gene can leave the family if he wants to and there's nothing this father can do about it because he doesn't have as much power any more. And also, his sons are not children anymore even though he treats them like they are in order to gain control again.

I want you to go upstairs!

Nubsib lives in a devided and distant family as well. He knew he would not be accepted because like we've seen in the flashbacks and what his dad talked about this episode as well, his parents don't support his choice of being an actor. But he's more worried about Gene because he already went through the phase of not feeling appreciated. Gene didn't. He discovers a new side of his parents and never had such drama with them. After this awful evening, we see the difference between both families nevertheless. Gene's parents cry both on their own but Nubsib's parents sit together on the sofa, symbolizing this unity they always were. They live in a distant world apart from their children. The world of them and Nubsib is disappointed, angry and worried at the same time.

Dad, but Gene and I did nothing wrong.

Cinematography

There are many examples to talk about the beautiful cinematography of Lovely Writer. I will only list the ones which are the most memorable to me.

Like I said above, the bar in the beginning sends out mixed signals of comfort and angst.

In contrast to this, we have Nubsib's bedroom with calm and warm light when he and Gene "take the next step".

The next morning, they brush their teeth in a very bright and white bathroom. Like they reached heaven. It's used to symbolize their happiness and also honesty. Their love is very pure because they mean every word they say and every action they follow.

At the very end, we have both Gene and Nubsib crying in their bedrooms. Gene's bed seems to be huge because he curls up. He is sad and angry but not surprised. He expected things to go down this way. Nubsib in contrast, is filmed through his shelf. This shelf frames him and since it's not a very big one, it makes Nubsib seem extremely small. He is disappointed in his parents, didn't expect things to happen this way and feels like he doesn't belong there. He feels very small on a very big planet.

Conclusion

This episode was overwhelming and the atmosphere switched a lot.

What I realized, especially after the scene between Aoey and Mhok, they all share the same feeling of loneliness. They all feel lonely and seek redemption. Gene and Nubsib found theirs and Aoey pushes his away. They all hate the feeling of loneliness but have gotten so used to it, it made them a bit bitter and feel a certain level of worthlessness. Like redemption would never come. But it did, at least for the main characters, but that doesn't necessarily mean everything is fine now and I like this. Even though they've grown, they are still not untouchable and there's always something that could set them back and make them face a challenge. Mostly, BLs end as soon as they are together and when everything looks like they will last forever. They feel untouchable because "love survives" but here we have a situation which is challenging for both of them and it looks like they are nearly breaking up because of this. Their relationship is not untouchable at all because the outside is also a part of their lives (like it normally is). BLs just tend to forget that but Lovely Writer thankfully doesn't and talks about this which I really like about this new episode.

Anyway, I have to go to bed now...