#not a big problem since it's just an entryway. but i end up having to chase after her to bring her back so i try to avoid it.

[orcelito]

I would give anything for my little Tally. I've absolutely loved seeing her personality again. I love hearing her yowling at 2 am. This is not sarcasm, I genuinely do. She's such a baby. I went to the bathroom without her so she's crying out to the whole apartment trying to find where I went. So I call back to her, and then I hear her meows Approaching... and then she's with me once more, here to shadow me, bc she loves sitting next to me while I'm on the toilet. She was sitting next to me while I was folding laundry, too. She's such a sweet baby and I love her so much.

She's the cat that I mentioned was curled up on my lap and purring earlier. SUCH a sweetheart.

[starsinthesky5]

you belong with me l || joe burrow x reader

description: you and joe have been best friends ever since ohio state and you’ve been his biggest supporter for as long as you both could remember. it was always the same dynamic between you both, friends. very very very close friends. but what if you wanted to be more than just friends?

a/n: best friends to lovers HELLO? you are both so oblivious yet so aware of your feelings at the same time it is crazy. so many little moments that have you like “how the hell are you not aware you’re in love with each other?”.

you’re in denial for a lot of this fic, and Joe pretty much knows what he wants but is a little scared to actually do something about it 

part 2

warnings: language, mentions of sex (no actual smut)

word count: 13.3 k 

—-------------------------------------

Thursday

You had just gotten home from running a few errands, absolutely exhausted from all the running around you had been doing from Christmas shopping and planning for your sister's wedding. You left all the bags in your entryway and collapsed on your couch. 

“Ughh,” you groaned into the pillow. It had been a pretty chaotic week for you and you felt tired and burnt out, and were in desperate need of a night out. 

You heard your phone buzz in your pocket so you moved to lay on your back and pulled your phone out to see who was calling. The name on your screen immediately made you smile and forget about your fatigue, so naturally, you answered it. 

“Hey, Y/N,” Joe said over the phone as he sat down on his couch.

“Hi Joe,” you smiled as you started twirling your his sweatshirt string. Somehow you ended up with a few of Joe’s shirts or hoodies in your closet from when you’d be over at his place or him at yours. Currently, you have one of his old LSU hoodies which was a little big on you, but that made it even more comfier. “How was practice?”. 

“Good,” He breathed out, sounding a little weary. 

“Is something wrong? You sound extra tired,” you ask your best friend. 

“Nah, Just the usual tiredness from practice but I’m fine,” he lied.

You could tell when Joe would lie to you, the tone of his voice would usually give it away. And right now, he was lying to you. “I know you too well Joe, what's up?”. 

He let out a sigh and said, “The Bengals Christmas Party is tomorrow night and I’m dreading it,”. 

“Ahhh, I see. Mr. Hermit Crab has to go to a partyyyy,” you tease. 

“Really funny,” He says, rolling his eyes which you could feel through the screen.

“I know you don’t partially enjoy parties but it’s Christmas, lighten up,” you tell him. “There will be lots of people there to keep you company,”.

“And that’s just the problem. Everyone there is just gonna wanna talk about football and I need one night to just relax,” he says. 

You felt bad for Joe since you knew how all of this would get draining for him. It was already stressful enough that the playoffs were slowly creeping up and the background noise was only getting louder by the day, and then he had 50 other things on top of that to do. He didn’t get any break time once December rolled around. That’s also why it was hard for him to enjoy his birthday, which happened to be next Sunday. 

“I know, I’m sorry. I wish I could do something to stop you from going but you are the face of the team and not going would look bad,”.

As he listens to you, an idea pops into his head. He sits up and says, “You know, it would be a lot more tolerable if you came with me?”. 

Your eyes light up at his offer. Joe always ended up bringing you with him to events like this. Ever since he got drafted by the Bengals, you’d be right by his side at any team activities that needed a plus 1. At first, you weren’t really sure why he’d bring you along with him, and quite honestly you still aren’t really sure since he could just go alone or bring anyone else, but it always seemed to make him more comfortable when you were there and you’d be happy to keep him company at any given time.

“That’s if you're free?” He adds.

“Oh trust me, I am. I’m in desperate need of a night out so this might be the thing I need,” you say as you hop off the couch and walk into your bedroom to figure out an outfit for tomorrow. 

“Everything alright?” He asks as he gets up to figure out his own outfit for tomorrow now that he actually has a reason to go. 

“Yeah, just a triple homicide. Work, Christmas, and my Sister's wedding planning,” you say as you pull out a few Christmasy dresses, none really catching your eye. 

“Damn, December really isn’t our month,” he laughs. “You need a night out,”. 

“You got that right,” you smile. You're just about to ask him what he was thinking of wearing to the party but your sister calls you, interrupting you and Joe’s call. 

“Shit, my Sister’s calling me. Probably more wedding stuff,” you sigh.

“That’s okay,” he laughs. “I’ll pick you up at 6 tomorrow,” he adds.

“Sounds perfect. See you tomorrow,” you smile.

“Bye, Y/N,” he replies before hanging up. You then call your sister back, placing the phone on speaker and throwing it onto the bed.

“Hey Kaylee,” you say as you go back to outfit hunting for tomorrow. 

“Hey, you busy?” She asks.

“A little. I’m trying to find an outfit for tomorrow,” you say as you pull out a cropped red sweater. 

“What’s tomorrow?” She asks.

“Joe asked me to go with him to the team Christmas party,” you said as you dug through your closet for a black mini skirt and sheer tights to go with the sweater. 

“Aw that’s nice,” she says. “You know, with the number of things Joe brings you to or does with you, you’d think that you both would be a couple by now. You are practically his girlfriend,” she jokes, only partly though. 

You immediately stop looking through your closet and turn back to face your phone. “What?” you say as you feel yourself turning red at the mention of being his girlfriend, a thought you buried all those years ago because you thought it was silly. 

“I’m just joking, Y/N, kind of. But I mean, you are doing what girlfriends typically do. I know you’re really close friends and you have been for years, but he brings you to like everything and you’re always doing something together. People think you’re his secret girlfriend for a reason,” she says. 

You find yourself staring off into space as she’s talking. Deep down, you knew she was right but you just didn’t want to look at it that way. You were doing girlfriend duties for him and it became clearer as time passed by. At first, it didn’t bother you much, it was just two best friends doing best friend things right? It was completely normal for you to go to every single one of his games, go to these team events with him, and spend so much time together, right? But as time went on, you started to realize that maybe people’s comments weren’t totally out of left field. It did look like you were his girlfriend, especially since he didn’t have any other girl with him most of the time. 

You had feelings for Joe back when you first met at Ohio State, but you never did anything about them because you thought he didn’t feel the same. You spent weeks spiraling over your feelings towards him, but you eventually gave up because you didn’t want to lose him as a friend in case he felt differently about you, so you buried the feelings and moved on. Or so you thought you buried them. Clearly, that wasn’t the case since you were spiraling, again, at the thought of being his girlfriend and being told that you were acting like it too.  

You never pushed Joe about his dating life because you thought that was boundary stomping. Yes, you two were very close, but you didn’t really want to know the details about his love life for many reasons. You just watched that part of his life from a distance. He had a few girlfriends over the years, none of which stuck around or fizzled out over time. The only consistent girl in his life was you. And that’s why everyone thought you were his girlfriend when he first got drafted.

They were convinced you both were either dating or hooking up, neither of which was true. It was a little awkward when that gained traction, but it slowly faded out over time but still lingered to this day. You both tried to not let it affect your friendship and for the most part, it worked. You ignored and continued to support him in every way possible, but those thoughts of you being a couple were buried deep inside your mind and sometimes peeked through, just like how they were right now. 

“I haven’t really looked at it that way,” you lied. 

“Of course you haven’t. Why would you? Joe is such a great guy and has been a great friend to you for years. Why would you ever think that way,” she laughs.

Being best friends with one of the best quarterbacks in the league had its perks. But you weren’t one to take advantage of that often. You were just there to support your best friend and enjoy the ride. To everyone else, he was Joe Burrow. But to you, he was just Joe. And you loved that you got to see the real him and the guy you met in college was still there regardless of everything that’s changed since then. 

“Rightttt,” you say as you sit down on your bed.

“Well anyways, I’ll leave you to it. I was just calling about what the menu should look like for the pre-wedding brunch but we can talk about that later,” she says.

“You sure?” You ask.

“Positive. Have fun at the party and tell Joe I said hi,”.

“Thanks, Kaylee and I will. I’ll call you soon,” you say as you hang up. You toss your phone to the side and fall back onto your bed. The thought of you and Joe being a couple was stupid, right? You both had been friends for years and never once did he show any other feelings other than friendship towards you, so why was this even a thought? Were you not seeing something that everyone else was? Did Joe ever have the same thoughts as you?

He was the perfect guy. He was kind, selfless, funny, attractive, smart, and charming. Any girl would be so lucky to have him as her boyfriend. Wouldn’t it be nice if he was your boyfriend? He matches your vibe completely and you both have so much in common, plus you already know so much about each other. You would be the perfect couple and people wouldn’t even be surprised if you got together. 

“Nah, this is stupid,” you shook your head as you broke out of whatever fantasy you were dreaming about. 

But was it a fantasy, or was it something that you both wished was reality deep down?

Friday Night 

The next day flew by pretty quickly and you found yourself sitting at your vanity, applying the last bit of makeup before Joe picked you up. You opted for a cropped red sweater, a black mini skirt with sheer tights, and black knee-high boots. Jewelry-wise, you didn’t go all out. Just your usual earrings and necklaces, but you made sure to wear the diamond tennis bracelet Joe got you after he signed his rookie contract. You didn’t wear it often since it was so expensive, but whenever you did, Joe would notice and a huge smile would appear on his face. 

Flashback to 2020

You sat down on Joe’s couch as he brought over two glasses of red wine. He had called you over for dinner tonight at his new place that he bought once his contract money came through.

“I loveee your house. It’s very homey,” you chirp as you pull a plush blanket over your legs. 

“Thank you,” he smiles as he sits down, handing you your wine glass. “If everything goes according to plan, I’ll be upgrading in a few years,”.

“Oh trust me, it’ll go just as planned,” you say, taking a sip of the blood red wine. “You’re about to set the league on fire,”.

“I appreciate the confidence,” Joe laughs as he sips his wine. 

“I’m so glad you got drafted to Cincy. It was already tough enough that you were down in Baton Rouge for 2 years, I don’t know what I would’ve done if you got drafted anywhere else,” you sigh. 

“Sounds like somebody missed me,” he said as he threw his head back into the couch pillow.

“No shit, goofball. I missed my best friend,” you laughed as you playfully shoved his shoulder. 

“Well, take this as an apology,” he says, putting his glass to the side and reaching down to grab something from the side of the couch. He pulls up a small lilac gift bag and places it in your lap. 

“What’s this?” you question as butterflies fill your stomach. You place your glass on the side table and examine the little bag.

“An apology for being away for 2 years,” he says, raising his eyebrows and motioning you to open the bag.

“It’s not like I didn’t see you at all. I went to a few games and you still came back here during your breaks,” you said as you patted his thigh. 

“Still, I wasn’t at your fingertips like I usually am,” he laughs, causing a blush to creep up your face. “Just open it,”.

You nod and open the bag and are met with a beige box. You open the box and your jaw drops at the sight of a shiny, very real-looking, diamond tennis bracelet sitting inside. 

“Joe, what the fuck,” you whispered as you ran your fingers across the big diamonds. “You didn’t have to- This must’ve been so expensive,”.

“Don’t worry about all that. It’s a gift from me to my best friend and saying no would be rude,” he says, grabbing the bracelet and helping you put it on. “In case you forgot, I am a millionaire now, and you never wanna upset a millionaire,” he jokes. 

“Don’t send your minions on me now,” you joke as he clasps the bracelet onto your wrist. “But seriously, you didn’t have to do this,”.

He tilts his head, giving you a look that you never were one to argue with. “Fine, Fine. Thank you sooo much. I love it,” you say as you launch yourself onto him, pulling him in for a warm hug. 

He wraps his arms around you tightly and laughs into your shoulder. His hand runs up and down your back as you run your fingers through his soft hair. You weren’t sure how long you both were hugging; you were waiting for him to pull away, but he was waiting for you to pull away. But at the same time, neither of you really wanted to pull away. 

You appreciated the glamorous gift from him, and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t feel butterflies in your belly when you opened the box. Little did you know this bracelet was his first official purchase from his contract money. He knew that once the money hit his account, he wanted to buy you something to show how much he cared for you, the only girl that has been by his side through thick and thin. 

End of flashback 

Last night’s thoughts were no longer in your head as you reminded yourself that Joe was just your best friend. Nothing more, and nothing less. There was no reason to ruin your bond with a silly little pipe dream. 

You heard your phone buzz from what was probably a text from Joe. You opened the text, laughing at the text, which was a little inside joke you two had made over the years.

Joe: getaway car 

“Getaway Car” was a term you both would use whenever you needed to escape something. Whether it was wanting to leave a college party because you were feeling uncomfortable, wanting to leave an awkward situation, or like right now, when either of you needed a break from life and needed to do something fun. All you would say to each other was “getaway car” and you’d know what was up.  

You smiled at the text, grabbed your purse, and made your way out the door and down to his car. 

Meanwhile, Joe was humming along to the song playing on his aux, ‘Lovers Rock’ by TV Girl. You both had made a shared Spotify playlist years ago back at OSU and would often listen to the playlist whenever you were together, so naturally he had to play it on the way to the party. This song was clearly your addition as Joe’s music taste was a little different, but he’d learn to enjoy songs like this because of you. 

You also used to listen to this playlist during the time Joe was away at LSU and you would miss talking to him since he was extremely busy. He would do the same on those nights when he was alone and couldn’t sleep because he would be missing your silly little movie nights, thinking about if you were having these movie nights with anyone else while he was away. 

You made your way out of your apartment building, spotted Joe’s car, and walked over to it. You knocked on the window since he was too busy staring off into space to notice you walk over. He jumped slightly at the sudden noise but then relaxed as he realized it was just you. He unlocks the door which you swing open, hopping inside and letting out a deep breath.

“Woo, it’s freezing out there,” you say as you rub your hands together for some warmth. 

He stares at you up and down, taking in your outfit which you looked stunning in, his eyes stopping at your wrist which was decked with the diamond bracelet he got you. A smile creeps on his face, which you notice. 

“You look really beautiful,” He smiles as he puts the car into drive and exits the parking lot. 

You blushed at his compliment as you also took in what he was wearing. Black jeans and a dark green sweater along with one of his many diamond chains. He looked so good right now. The way his hair naturally fell into place, the way his mouth was curled up into a smile, and the way his sweater fit perfectly around his muscular arms. He just looked so good. 

“You don’t look too bad yourself, Burrow,” you tease. 

“Thanks for coming with me by the way,” he smiles over at you.

“Anytime,” you smile back. “Remember, just say ‘getaway car’ if you wanna leave if you get overwhelmed or something,”. 

“Aye-Aye, Captain,” he salutes. 

You take note of the song playing in the car and you blush again, and then hear Joe singing a bit of the song under his breath.

"While the others talk, We were listening to lovers rock, In her bedroom," he mumbles.

“Lovers Rock?” You question. “Damn, someone’s music taste def rubbed off on you,”.

“Actually, it’s our playlist that’s on right now. But yeah, I’ve learned to enjoy this kinda music. Might be because of a certain someone,” he shrugs. 

“Hmm, whoever she is must have excellent taste,” you say as you turn up the volume.

“Oh trust me,” he says looking over at you, the look on his face sending shivers down your spine. “She definitely does,”. 

A short drive later, you both arrive at the party. Joe turns the car off, hops out, and jogs over to your side, helping you out of the car before you can even open the door. 

“Such a gentleman,” you tease as you reach to close the car door, but he beats you to it. 

“For you? Always,” he winks as he closes your door and loops your arm around his, leading you into the party. You blush at the contact, but why were you blushing? He’s just being friendly, right?

Before you can dive deeper into those thoughts again, you find yourself already inside the party. soft Christmas music was playing over the speakers as the room was filled with people. You could see why he didn’t want to go now, especially alone. There were a bunch of food stations around the room, holiday photo ops, Christmas games, and the whole 9 yards. It was all a little overwhelming and it looked like Christmas threw up all over the party venue. 

“Merry Christmas,” you whisper. 

“See why I didn’t wanna come here alone?” he laughs. 

“Ohh yeah,” you nod as he leads you over to your friends. 

“Joe! Y/N!,” Jess says as she gets up from the table, a huge grin on her face. 

“Hey Jess,” you chirp as you pull away from Joe’s arm to hug your friend. 

“Hi Jess,” Joe smiles. “Where’s Sam?”.

“Oh, I think he’s over by the drinks with Ja’Marr and Ted,” she says as she pulls away from the hug. 

Joe looks over at you and you already know what he is going to ask, “Go,” you laugh. “I’ll be here with Jess. Yell if you need me?”.

“You got it,” he smiles as he walks over to the guys. 

“I guess Joe strung you along with him tonight?” Jess asks as she sits back down, pulling out the chair next to her for you. 

“Yeah,” you laugh as you sit down. “He didn’t wanna go and asked if I could go with him to make it more tolerable,”.

“Sounds like Joe,” she laughs. “He really hasn’t changed since college has he? He always used to drag you along to all the parties,”. 

“Not at all,” you smile as you see him laughing with the guys. 

“So, first thoughts about the party? Since it’s your first time here,” she asks as she takes a sip of her drink. 

“Verrry Christmasy and grand. Maybe a little Overwhelming?” you sigh. 

“That sounds about right,” she laughs, looking up and smiling, prompting you to turn your head. 

Joe was walking over, a grin on his face and a drink in his hand. “I got you your favorite,” he says, placing the Peach Mojito down in front of you. 

“Thank You,” you smile up at him, squeezing his hand for a second. 

“I’m not drinking tonight so make sure you drink for me too,” he says. 

“Say less,” you say while you pick up your delicious drink. 

“You good though?” He asks.

“I’m great, go with the guys,” you say, flashing him a reassuring smile. 

“Okay. But if you need anything, just come over,” he says. 

“Same goes for you,” you say as he gives you two thumbs up before walking away. 

“Always making sure you’re good before he does anything else. Classic Joe,” Jess smiles, causing you to freeze for a second. He always did that though, right? That’s just what he does with all his friends, not just you. 

“No big deal,” you whisper to yourself. 

“Hm?” Jess asks. 

“Oh nothing, just talking to myself,” you brush off. “So wait. Did Joe go to the party last year?” you ask, changing the subject as you take a sip of your drink. That question was floating through your mind all day, and you needed to know the answer. He didn’t take you last year but he definitely went, but with who? 

“Mhm,” she nods. “He went with Stella,”.

Your heart drops when she says that name. “Ohh right, his ex,” you sigh. 

“Yup,” she nods.  

His ex-girlfriend Stella. You didn’t really know much about her since you only talked to her a couple of times. One day she was in the suite, then suddenly she wasn’t. You didn’t push Joe to tell you what happened, especially since he didn’t seem too upset about it. All he told you was that they both just didn’t work. 

“What happened between them? You know I usually don’t push him about his love life,”. 

“Oh I know,” she laughs. “I don’t really know the full story myself. All Sam told me was that Joe felt like it didn’t fit. Like it wasn’t really what he was looking for relationship-wise or person-wise,”. 

“Interesting,” you say as you sip your drink. You rarely interacted with his girlfriends. Not just because they wouldn’t stick around so why bother, but also because you felt like they didn’t really like your vibe for some reason. Maybe it was because he would always talk about you and spend time with you, but did they care that much? You were just friends anyway and you thought that was obvious.

Joe’s POV

“Sooo, you brought Y/N?” Ja’Marr teases.

“Yes… I did,” you say, taking a sip of your water. 

“Anything going on over there,” Sam teases as he pats your shoulder. 

“What? With me and Y/N?” You scoff. “Please, we would never-”.

“Now don’t lie to me Burrow,” Ja’Marr says. “Don’t act like you wouldn’t go running to her if she looked at you that way,”. 

“Ja’Marr is right,” Ted adds. “It’s kinda obvious you have a thing for her,”. 

“Are you guys drunk?” You scoff. “What’s with the sudden attack?”. 

“Nah, but you might be,” Ja’Marr says. “Wake up Man. You clearly like her. You’re always talking about her, you’re always with her and don’t forget all those times at LSU when you’d be going on about how you wished she was with you right now. Those feelings ain’t die that easily,”.

“There’s a reason that everyone thought and still thinks that she’s your girlfriend,” Sam says.

“That’s just overly invasive fans and their stupid speculation,” you deflect. 

“Mmm, not to mention, have there been any ladies on your radar since Stella? You both broke up in January which was 11 months ago. And the reason was that you didn’t think she was the right person for you,” Ted says.

“Mhm, and does the right person that you’re looking for happen to be sitting there next to my girlfriend?” Sam adds as points over at you. 

You look over at her, smiling as you see her laughing like a hyena at something Jess said. She looked angelic as the soft glow of the lights reflected off her beautiful face; her cute laugh caught your attention even though you were so far away from each other in the crowded room. 

Deep down, you knew they were right. You didn’t want to admit it, but you did have a thing for her and have had a thing for her since OSU. You never brought up those feelings to anyone, not even Y/N. You didn’t know if she felt the same way about you and you were too scared that you’d ruin your friendship if she didn’t feel the same way. 

Those feelings even stuck around at LSU. They actually got stronger since you were away from her for so long. But you once again didn’t want to screw up your bond, so you repressed those feelings as much as you could and tried to distract yourself, but distractions were only temporary. That’s also why none of your girlfriends suck around. They weren’t what you were looking for and you weren’t invested.  What you were looking for had always been by your side since Day 1, but you just didn’t know what to do about it without risking your friendship. You knew you loved her, and she knew that you loved her as a friend. But she didn’t know that you loved her a lot more than how just friends loved each other.

She was the perfect girl. Any man would be lucky to have her as his girlfriend. She was stunning, genuine, funny, fearless, the epitome of a dream girl. Her being your girlfriend was a dream, but it probably would never happen. It never happened all these years you had known each other, so why now? 

But what if she liked you back? You wouldn’t know because you never tried that door, even though you had the key in your pocket all along.

End of Joe’s POV

The party flew by quickly as you talked with the WAGs for a little, ate some yummy food, and Joe made his rounds as QB1 talking to as many people as he could before his social battery ran out. Occasionally, he’d look over at you if he got a little nervous or overwhelmed. The mere sight of you always calmed him down. And once his battery died, he found himself sitting next to you, as usual. 

Joe’s conversation with the guys still lingered in his mind as he watched you chat and drink with your friends. He didn’t know what to do about the feelings he was feeling towards you and how to handle them, so he decided to let it be and just let things flow the way they were. If something was going to happen, it would. If it wasn’t, it wouldn’t. Forcing something would be the last thing he’d ever do with you. 

You were extra giggly for the past hour, definitely drunk since you were on your 4th, maybe 5th drink of the night. You weren’t really sure anymore since you and the other girls did shots at the bar earlier, so it was definitely more than 5. 

“Y/N, how many drinks have you had,” Joe asks as he looks over at you. 

“Hmmm, I don’t know. Numbers are funny,” you giggle as you grab his arms. “You look really pretty tonight, Joey,” you giggle as you grab another drink. “Have you thought about being a male model? I heard Calvin Klein does some pretty fun shots. The girlies would lose it. I know I would,” you giggle.  

Joe’s eyes widened as he blushed a little. You were clearly out of your mind drunk and he knew exactly what would happen when you got this wasted. You’d be all giggly, then you’d have the zoomies, and then you’d crash, hard. He couldn’t have this happen at the party in front of everyone and he knew you’d kick his ass if he let you act like this in front of them. 

“Okayyy, I think that’s enough drinks for tonight,” he says, taking your drink out of your hand.

“Noooo,” you whine as you reach for the drink. “It’s so good though,”.

“And so is weed but you don’t see me being high all the time,” he jokes as he pushes the drink further away from you. 

You raise your eyebrow at him and say, “That’s funnyyyy. Those shades are glued to your face for a reason,”. 

He stares at you for a few seconds, taking in every detail of your face. How your glossy lips were curled up into a smile, how little strands of your hair were falling onto your face, and how you were practically glowing in the soft light of the room. 

“I don’t think you’d particularly enjoy being crossfaded,” he says matter-of-factly. 

“Do you have some right now? Let’s test it out,” You say as your eyes light up.

Oh hell no. How drunk were you? Joe thought to himself.  “Y/N,” he says, staring deeply into your eyes, grabbing both your hands. 

“What?” You giggle softly as you play with the wristbands on his wrist. 

“Getaway Car,” he says.

You immediately sit up in your chair and turn serious at the words that left his mouth, reminding you what those words meant and what they were used for. “Are you okay? Did something happen?”. 

“I’m fine,” he laughs as he grabs your hand that was playing with his wristbands. “But you’re not. You’re 2 seconds away from falling over,”.

“What do you mean? I’m amazingggg,” you laugh as you stand up to prove your point, almost falling over but Joe places his hands on your hips, catching you before you can. His big warm hands were firmly holding you in place as heat climbed up your body at his electric touch. 

“Yeaah, we’re going home now,” he says as he gets up from his chair, not giving you a second to protest. He grabbed your waist with one hand to make sure you didn’t fall over as you said your goodbyes and made your final lap around the room. The hand that was wrapped around your waist caused butterflies to fill your belly. His touch was so gentle and fulfilling, yet had you craving more.

He led you out to the car, his hand still gripping your waist, as you were going on about how much you loved Christmas. 

“I just love giving gifts,” you giggle as you lean your head on his shoulder. “It’s sooo fun getting to see everyone’s reactions when they open the gifts I give them. Speaking of, what do you want for Christmas Joey?”. 

“Nothing,” Joe smiles. “I already have everything I want,” he says, looking down at you. 

You pause for a few seconds as your drunken mind tries to process what he said. You didn’t see him look down at you, but you could feel his gaze on you. He wasn’t talking about you, was he? He was definitely just talking about his life and career. 

“That’s funny. I already got your birthday gift down for next Sunday, but you gotta meet me halfway for Christmas,” you say, quickly dodging those thoughts again. 

“Mmm, still don’t want anything. For either occasion in fact,” he says as you reach the car. He removes his hand from your waist to open your door and then helps you sit inside. 

“Well too bad,” you smile as he sits in the driver’s seat. “I guess I’ll have to figure it out myself,”.

“Have fun,” he says as he connects his phone to the Bluetooth; your playlist once again playing on the speakers. 

You fall back into your seat and bob your head along to the music as Joe pulls the car out of the parking spot, and leaves the party venue. A few minutes later, you��ve made it onto the highway. Your head is leaning against the comfy headrest as you look over at Joe. His tan skin was shining in the moonlight and his pink lips were curled up into a smile. You move your head to look out the window, taking in the gorgeous view of the Cinncinati Skyline, and then notice that Joe drove past the exit that you would take to get downtown to your apartment.

“Joe, you missed the exit,” you say as you flip your head back over to him.

“I know,” he laughs. 

“Uhhh, well are you gonna go a different way or?” you mumble.

“Nah, you’re way too drunk to be left alone tonight. We’re going back to my place,” he says.

“Joe, you don’t have to do that. I’ll be fine on my own and I don’t wanna intrude,” you say, sitting up in your seat.

“Intrude on what? It’s just me in that big-ass house,” he laughs. “Having some company won’t hurt,”.

“Are you sure?” you ask.

“Positive. I know how you get when you’re this drunk and I would be a terrible friend to make you deal with that alone,” he laughs. 

“Yeahh,” you trail off. “You’re such a great..friend,”. It pained you a little to say “friend” and you weren’t entirely sure why. It also pained Joe a little to hear you say “friend”. If only you would put “boy” in front of it, he thought to himself. 

“So it’s settled then. You’re getting the Burrow treatment tonight,” he winks, looking over at you, his eyes sparkling in the moonlight. 

“Uhhh, are we still talking about hangover care or?” you joke, breaking out into a fit of laughter. 

“Dirty, Dirty Mind,” he chuckles as he shakes his head. 

You bit your bottom lip as you stared out the window again, watching the cars pass by one by one you let out a content sigh and got comfy in the car seat again. But then, the song on the aux changed, immediately catching your attention and causing you to flip your head back to him. 

Joe’s eyes light up as he hears the soft music playing in the background, recognizing the song instantly and raising the volume. 

“Ohh yeah,” you say, moving up in your seat and swaying your shoulders as you recite the song lyrics. 

“Because I'm eighteen, And I still live with my parents. Yeah, they're not like yours,” you belt out as you close your eyes and dance in your seat. 

“Well, yours are more understanding. I've never fell in love, I've saved those feelings for you,” Joe sings, looking right over at you as he sings that last bit. He watches you cutely dance around in your seat, his heart softening as he takes in the moment. Something about you sitting in his car seat, after a late night, on the way back to his house, made him feel all giddy inside. 

“So let's do all the stupid shit that young kids do. It's me and you, youuu,” you sing as you open your eyes and point at Joe, who looks a little..lovestruck?

Lovestruck? Please, as if he would ever feel that about you out of all people, you thought to yourself. The alcohol in your system was really messing with your mind right now. 

About 20 minutes later, Joe pulled into the driveway of his house, which was massive. He definitely had upgraded from his last house, just as he had hoped to and just as you said he would do. It was just him in this big house, all alone. He would often get bored since he didn’t have anyone around to keep him company, so he was more than ecstatic to have you over for the night.  

After parking in the garage, he helps you inside the house. He walks you over to the kitchen island, pulling out a barstool with his leg, and motioning for you to sit down.

“First order of business, Water and Advil,” he says as he grabs a water bottle from the fridge, then moves to open the drawer to grab the bottle of Advil. He pulls out two tablets and hands them to you along with the water. 

“Thank you,” you say after you wash down the medicine with the water. 

“Second order of business, getting you something comfy to wear,” he says, grabbing your hand and yanking you off the stool. His warm hand molded perfectly against yours as he led you up the stairs to his bedroom. 

“But I don’t have any clothes here,” you mumbled as he pulled you into his room, still holding your hand. 

“That’s okay, you can just wear one of my big shirts,” he says as drops your hand and walks into his closet, returning to the room after a few moments with a purple LSU shirt in hand. “Is this good?” he asks.

“Perfect,” you whisper as you take the shirt from his hand. “Be right back,” you smile as you walk into his bathroom. 

You peel off your clothes from tonight, placing them into a neat pile on the vanity as you slip on his shirt. It was massive on you, no surprise there though. You smiled as you read the text on the shirt; it was his championship t-shirt from when he won the Natty. You scrunched up the fabric, bringing it to your nose, taking a deep breath, and remembering that amazing night.

Flashback to 2020 – New Orleans, Louisiana 

You looked over at the scoreboard, the score reading 42-25 just as the clock was winding down with only a few minutes left in the 4th quarter. 

“He did it, he really fucking did it,” you whispered as tears started to fall from your eyes, your friends all jumping up and down around you and screaming at the top of their lungs. 

“3..2..1,” Lydia screamed as purple and yellow confetti filled the stadium. The LSU tigers had just won the national championship, Joe had just won the national championship. After years of hard work and dedication, never backing down from a challenge, his dreams had finally come true, and you got to be apart of it and witness it. 

After watching the trophy presentation and the celebrations on the field from the stands, you made your way down to the field, hoping to get a moment with Joe before he was pulled in for media. 

You made your way through the crowds of reporters, players, and families in search of him, but you literally could not figure out where he was. 

“Did he already get pulled in for media?” you asked yourself as you looked around the field, your smile dropping. 

Suddenly, you felt two arms snake around your waist and pull you back into a warm embrace. “What the F-”.

“Calm down, Y/N, it’s just me,” he says, swaying you back and forth. You could recognize that voice anywhere, even in the loudest settings. You place your hands on his and turn your head up, meeting his baby-blue eyes. 

“Joe,” you whisper, feeling tears fill your eyes again. 

“Hi,” he mumbled before you flipped around in his arms and looped your arms around his neck, pulling him in for a hug. 

“You did it,” you said, crying into his shoulder. “I’m s- so proud of you,”.

“Hey, Hey, why are you crying?” he asked, rubbing circles on your back for comfort. 

You pulled your face out from his shoulder and said, “Because, you’re a national champion now, Silly. This is what you’ve been working for and it finally happened. I’ve been fortunate enough to be by your side through the whole thing and can’t help but get emotional when my best friend just had his dream come true,”. 

He stays silent for a few moments before he pushes your head back into his chest. “Thank you. For everything,” he says, his grip on your waist getting tighter. He remembered how you had been nothing but supportive of his dreams since you met. There were days back at OSU when he would come back to his dorm after practice, feeling shitty and lost since nothing felt like it was going his way, and you would drop whatever you were doing at the moment to go and comfort him since he didn’t want to be alone. Those many late nights you spent trying to help him study and catch up on his work so that he could focus on football during the day. And nothing would ever come close to how you refused to miss a single one of his games, even if you were watching back in Ohio. He remembers you telling him that at your friend's bachelorette party, you had the game pulled up on your phone and sat at the bar the entire night watching instead of doing shots and dancing with your friends. 

The day he decided that he was going to LSU was hard for both of you. He could tell how you were holding back from telling him how you really felt, which was incredibly sad and upset, but you knew he had to do this for himself, and he watched as you plastered a smile on your face and cheered him on, even if it broke your heart. 

“You are the most strongest, dedicated, and talented person I know. I am so proud of youuu,” you squeal into his chest. 

Joe felt fireworks in his heart as he listened to you go on and on about how well he did in the game. Those feelings he had for you were so hard to avoid, and right now he felt like ripping the bandaid off and telling you how he felt straight up. But he couldn’t. He wanted nothing more than to kiss your soft lips right now and tell you that he loved you more than anything in the world, but he just couldn’t. Instead, he just enjoyed the feeling of you with him right now during one of the happiest moments in his life. There was no need to ruin it with his pipe dream.   

End of flashback 

You spent a few moments fixing your hair and washing your makeup off before turning off the lights and joining him back outside, but you stopped as you realized something. 

“Fuck, I don’t have shorts on,” you realize. You were just in his shirt, your white lace panties, and your socks, and didn’t know what to do. The shirt was big enough to cover your upper thighs and if you avoided any movement that caused the shirt to ride up, you would be fine.

“He won’t care regardless,” you whisper as you shake your head and leave the bathroom. 

While you were changing, Joe had changed into a pair of sweat shorts and a short-sleeved tee and was sitting on the bed, scrolling through his phone.

“Aren’t you cold? It’s December,” you giggle as you join him in the room again.

He looks up from his phone, heat rising up his cheeks as he takes in the sight of your bare legs and your body which was clothed by one of his shirts. Your cheeks were a little rosy, definitely an effect of all the alcohol you consumed. A feeling of nervousness now filled his body as he watched you put your stuff down on his table, the way your hips swayed from side to side, and how your hair bounced with each step. He realized that he hadn’t given you any shorts or boxers, so you were definitely just in your underwear right now, and that made him want to pass out. Why did he feel like a teenage boy all of a sudden? He had seen you in pajamas many times so why was he feeling like this? Whatever it was, it definitely was not helping the thoughts he had about your relationship earlier in the night because here you were, standing in his room, looking absolutely incredible. 

“You tell me,” he says as he raises his eyebrows. 

“Fair point,” you laugh as you walk over to his bookshelf, a photo frame catching your eye. He carefully watches you as you walk over to the picture, his heart feeling like it is about to beat out of his chest as he realizes what you are looking at. 

It was a photo of the two of you from one of his games at LSU. He was looking down at you, a huge grin on his face as if he was laughing at something you said. You were looking back up at him, smiling at his expression. You both were almost lost in each other’s eyes in this photo, something you hadn’t noticed before. This was Joe’s favorite photo of the two of you and he had managed to keep it to himself, up until now. 

Flashback to 2019 - LSU

You had flown into Baton Rouge early this morning and were going to surprise Joe at his game tonight since he had no idea you were coming. He had been begging you for weeks to come down for a weekend to see him because he missed you, but you kept pushing it off with lazy excuses so you could pull one on him. But little did he know, you had been planning a trip to see him for the past month. 

He caught a glimpse of you in the stands earlier, his entire face lighting up and his heart soaring. He thought he was dreaming for a second as he saw you sitting with his mom, wearing his number, and screaming his name, You waved over at him before the game started, but didn’t get a chance to talk to him as he was pulled into pregame warmups. Now, you were waiting in the tunnel as the game finished, eagerly waiting to see your best friend. 

You were chatting with Joe’s Mom as you waited for him to come out from the locker room. A few minutes later, you heard an all too familiar voice behind you. 

“You fucking liar,” he laughs.

You spin around, your heart skipping a beat as you see Joe standing in front of you. 

You walk over to him, launching yourself into his open arms and letting out a squeal as he tightly wraps them around your waist, slightly lifting you off the ground and swaying you from side to side. “I mm- missed you,” you sputtered, trying to hold back your emotions.

“And you said you were too busy with Jake’s cousin's wedding this weekend,” he says, his hand rubbing your lower back.

“Please, as if I would go to the wedding of my ex’s cousin rather than flying down to see my best friend who I haven’t seen in 5 months,” you say as he lets go of you, slowly sliding you back down to the floor. 

“Ex?” He asked.

“Oh yeah. I forgot to tell you over the phone. We broke up,” you say as you meet his eyes. 

“Really?” He asks, trying hard not to smile. He felt bad that you and Jake broke up, but part of him felt a little happy that there wasn’t any other guy in your life taking his space at the moment. Jake got to do everything Joe would do with you but couldn’t because he was away. The movie marathons, game nights, trying new restaurants, arcade runs, shopping, building legos, literally everything, he got to do, and it made Joe a little jealous. 

He never really got too involved in your dating life. He felt like it was uncharted territory since he was your best friend and a guy. It would be a little weird if he was getting involved. He also didn’t want to give the guys the wrong idea about your friendship. Although, he did have moments where he wished that it was a little more than just a friendship.

“Yeah,” you sigh. “Just didn’t feel right. He didn’t seem invested in the relationship lately anyway,”.

“Mr. Lovebombing not being invested? Shocker,” he teases. You felt your smile drop a little bit at his teasing. Yes, you were over him, but it still stung a little bit since you were pretty unlucky in the boyfriend department and this was just another addition.

He immediately felt bad for saying that, knowing how you felt about relationships, so he pulled you into a side hug. “Sorry, that was jerky,” he mumbles. 

“It’s okay,” you say as you pat his chest. “I should’ve seen it coming,”.

“Well if it makes you feel better, I never liked him anyway, he laughs. 

“Joe,” you say as you playfully swat his arm while pulling away from the hug. 

“Hey, can you blame me? He doesn’t like ‘The Office’. That’s a crime,” he deadpans. 

“I missed you so much,” you laughed, staring deeply into his eyes. God you missed him. You missed his cheery attitude, his million-dollar smile, and the comfort you’d feel when you were with him. Joe could turn your mood around in an instant and make you forget about everything bad in your life. No other guy could ever make you feel the way he did, it was an irreplicable feeling. 

“Me too,” he sighed. “5 months is way too long and you’re so far away,” he mumbled, looking down at his feet.

“I know but hey, I’m here now. And even if it’s for a few days, I’m here,” you say, gently rubbing his bicep.

He looks back up at you with a smile, “Yeah, you are,”. He looked into your chocolaty eyes, searching them for a few moments, hoping to find something in them that he’d been waiting for, but he was interrupted by your laughter. 

“They might have to force me onto the plane back to Ohio. I’ve been here for a day and I don’t want to go back,” you giggle. 

“I can sneak you into my apartment,” he shrugs. “Just act like you’re on the football team and you’re golden,” he jokes. 

While you two were talking, Joe’s mom snapped a few photos of your reunion, neither of you noticing the camera snaps.

“Oh yeahh. I’ll totally fit right in,” you say, shaking your head. “I can be your new star Wide Receiver,”.

“Ja’Marr and Justin might have a problem with that,” he shrugged. 

“They won’t when they see how great of a duo we make, on the field and off,” you wink. 

 End of flashback 

“I haven’t seen this one,” you smile as you look back at him. “Gatekeeping, Burrow?”.

“It’s one of my faves so yes, yes I am gatekeeping,” he shrugs. 

“Well, I’m stealing it,” you say, picking up the frame. 

“Uhh, no you’re not,” he says, slowly standing up from the bed. 

“Ohh yes, I am,” you tease as you turn around to meet his eyes. He walks over to you as you slowly walk backward, moving away from him. 

“Okayyy, I think it’s time for bed,” he says as he reaches out to grab you, but you take another leap back towards the door. 

“Nopeee,” you smirk. “Catch me if you can,” you say, sticking your tongue out at him before running out the door. 

“We are not about to do this,” Joe mumbles as he runs out the door, following you as you run through the halls of his house. Giggles and Laughter echo throughout the house as you run down the stairs, looking back a couple of times to see if he is still there, and he is. Even though he was exhausted, he was enjoying chasing you throughout the halls of his house. The usually quiet halls were now filled with your shrieks and giggles, a sound that he loved to hear. You run over to the kitchen, standing on the other side of the island as Joe runs to the couch to grab a pillow. 

“Joe!” you scream as he grabs a couch pillow, launching it straight at your head but you quickly duck. 

“You asked for it,” he laughed. 

“Oh, it’s on,” you grin as you place the photo on the island, making sure it didn’t get caught in the battle. 

“Whatcha gonna do?” he smirks as he places his hands on his hips, bouncing from side to side.

“Hmm, I don’t know,” you say as you slowly walk over to the comfy chair next to the dining table, grabbing a stray couch pillow and hiding it behind your back. 

He notices you hiding a pillow behind your back, so he leans down and grabs another one. While he was doing this, you ran over and started hitting him, gently of course, with the soft pillow. 

“Got youu,” you giggle as you smack him with a pillow repeatedly. 

“Nope,” he smirks as he grabs his pillow and swings at your abdomen. His strength was unmatched so the hit sent you back a little, almost causing you to fall over.

“Oh, now you’re done for,” you grin as you attack him with the soft pillow and he does the same to you. Giggles and squeals filled the room as you playfully battled it out, neither of you willing to give up. But soon, the teasing turned into a full-blown pillow fight as you both unleashed your inner children, swinging your pillows with wild abandon. Feathers flew everywhere, coating the floor in a soft, white blanket. A couple of swings later, you catch Joe off guard, tackling him to the ground as you place your legs on each side of his hips, caging him in on the floor. 

You hold your pillow above your head in mock triumph. He wriggled beneath you, trying to grab the pillow away, but you held it just out of reach, teasing and taunting him.

“I winnn,” you laugh as you look down, smiling at Joe's disheveled hair and flushed cheeks. You were so caught up in the childish moment that you didn’t even realize you were straddling his hips right now, and his hands were resting firmly on your hips. Your shirt had ridden up your thighs a little and you were definitely showing a little too much down there, but you were so caught up in the moment that you couldn’t care less.

“Zoomies?” Joe giggles as he looks into your eyes. 

“Zoomies,” you nod as you throw the pillow to the side, trying to catch your breath. A million thoughts were now rushing into your head at once. You were literally on top of him right now, but he didn’t even seem bothered by it. It was like he was enjoying it. Was he enjoying it? You move your hand down, placing each one on his biceps and digging your nails into his soft skin. 

Joe was trying so hard not to say something about how you were on top of him right now. He was just enjoying the sight of you above, as silly and sultry as that sounded. He looked down and noticed your bare thighs and the shirt riding up and you seemingly weren’t wearing anything under it other than your underwear, just like he had thought. God, you just looked so pretty and sexy, he thought to himself. Your hair was messy and your cheeks were blush pink, but you still looked gorgeous. You seemed so relaxed and comfortable, and he was trying so hard not to ruin the moment by saying something stupid. 

“You look so pretty,” he thought out loud, his face turning red as he realized he said that to you.

“Thank you,” you smile back, internally screaming at his comment. Was he being extra affectionate tonight, or were you just delusional? You definitely looked like a mess right now, and in no way did you look pretty, but his compliment still made your heart soar. A soft yawn left your lips as you rubbed your eyes, now feeling the ‘crash’ part of your hangover. 

“Crash time?” he asks as he rubs your thighs, your stomach fluttering at the contact. Why was he being so lovey-dovey right now? His soft hands massaged the plush skin of your thighs as you stared deeply into his baby blues, trying to make sense of what was going on. 

“Yeah,” you say as another yawn escapes your lips. You get off of him, slowly standing up as you are feeling the aftermath of the zoomies. Joe holds out his hands just in case you fall over as he gets up. 

“You can sleep in my bed and I can take the couch. The guest bedroom is kinda a mess right now since I’m using it for storage until they finish the basement,” he says.

“Hell no. I don’t wanna kick you out of your own bed,” you say as you pick up the pillows from the floor and put them back on the couch, your legs a little wobbly and your head feeling a little woozy. “I’ll take the couch,”.

“No way. You take the bed,” he says as he picks up the stray feathers from the floor. 

“Not happening, Joseph,” you mumble as you help him gather the feathers.

He heaves out a sigh, “I’m too tired to fight you on this. Why don’t we just share it?”. 

Your heart skips a beat as you look up at him, the look on his face telling you he is 100% serious. Although you and Joe had been friends for years, you had never slept in the same bed together. 

“As long as you’re not a kicker,” he jokes.

“Please, I sleep like a baby,” you say as you walk over to the trash can, throwing the feathers into the bin. “Besides, I’m more of a cuddler and not a kicker,”. 

“So that’s a yes?” He asks, trying not to sound too eager, especially at the mention of cuddling. 

“Fineee,” you smile. “If you insist,”.  

Internally, Joe was screaming. He told himself that he’d let things flow the way they were and let things happen naturally, that’s if something were to happen. He didn’t know if he was just reading into things a little too much, but was it just him or were you acting a little different around him?

Your heart felt like it was about to beat out of your chest. There was no reason for you to get so worked up over sharing a bed with Joe. It was nothing, just you sleeping right next to him, together under the covers, so incredibly close to his body. It was definitely nothing. 

A little later, you're getting ready for bed as Joe brings out an extra pillow for you. You walk over to the bed, open the soft covers, and slide in. His bed was so comfortable; so soft and like a cloud. He turns off the lights and plugs in his phone before joining you in bed. Your heart was beating so fast as he moved into the bed next to you. There was no reason for this to be weird, but you were making it weird. 

You moved back against the pillow, sliding down the bed, and pulling the covers up to protect you from the chilly room and to hide your nervousness. 

“Did you have fun tonight?” You asked Joe as you stared up at the ceiling. 

“Actually? I did. All thanks to you,” he said. 

“Really?” You giggled, moving your head to look at him. You could barely make out his face in the darkness, but you could tell he was looking at you. 

“Yup. You make everything more enjoyable and bearable for me,” he said, turning his head back over and staring up at the ceiling. “Did you have fun? I hope these football things aren’t getting too repetitive for you,”.

“Not at all repetitive. You know I love doing this stuff with you. I needed a break from life and this was just the thing. Thanks for bringing me with you,” you smiled.

“You don’t have to thank me, Y/N. You know I’m always here when you need something, even if it’s an escape from life for a day,” he says as he moves his hand down to yours, entwining your fingers together as he gives your hand a soft squeeze. Butterflies filled your stomach at his soft touch and meaningful words. 

“Besides, I enjoy having you as my permanent plus 1,” he laughs. 

“Permanent?” You ask, feeling the heat rise up your body again. 

“Yeah,” he sighs. “If you haven’t noticed, I’m not having much luck in the girlfriend department,”. 

“Not saying you’re filling in those shoes and are a filler,” he says, quickly trying to soften his words because of how jerky it sounded. “I just like having you with me all the time, Ya know? That’s prob why people think you’re my girlfriend”.

“It’s okay, Joe. I know what you mean,” you say, adding a fake laugh into the mix. Your stomach did a somersault when he said that. Were you really about to have this conversation about that topic right now? 

“But please, I could name at least 100 girls who would be standing at your doorstep in an instant,” you giggle. 

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean I want any of those girls,” he says, craning his head over to face you, his hand still holding yours, now tighter. 

“I want someone who matches my vibe. Someone who makes me feel normal and doesn’t constantly remind me that I’m a millionaire quarterback. Someone that I can take home to my parents and can feel comfortable around. Someone who can enjoy the simplicity of playing Smash-Bros and building Legos as a date. Someone that appreciates the real me and not the superficial flashy shit,” he says. As he was saying all of this, the girl he pictured in his mind was you. He was describing you. You were what he wanted. 

“You didn’t find that with Stella?” You asked, completely oblivious to what he was implying.

“Nah. She was great at first but as time went on I realized that she was more into the lifestyle of dating a football player than the actual relationship part. And I also didn’t feel fireworks with her,” he said.

“Ah yes. Fireworks. Just like your Mom told us,” you remembered. His mom had told you at dinner a few years ago that when she met his dad, she felt fireworks. Fireworks are what you feel when you meet the right person, according to Robin. You hadn’t felt fireworks with any other guy other than Joe, but you never told that to anyone. And he felt the same. He felt fireworks every time he was with you and he’d never felt that with any girl. 

“Yeah so I’ll probably die alone, he jokes.

“Please, we’ll die alone together,” you say as you take your hand out of hold and playfully shove his shoulder.

“I’m assuming there’s no guys on your radar?” He wonders, hoping you would say no.

“Nope. There hasn’t been any since Noah,” you replied.

“That was 8 months ago,” Joe gasped.

“Why do you sound so surprised?” you laughed. “You know I’ve never had luck with guys. None of them match my vibe and want something else out of the relationship that I don’t agree with. I want someone real, genuine, and serious,”. 

“I could name 100 guys that would be at your doorstep in an instant,” he says, echoing your words from earlier.

“Doesn’t mean I want any of them,” you say, echoing his words. 

“Fair point,” he laughs. 

“Yeah. So I’ll die alone too,” you joke.

“Technically not alone if we die alone together. We’ll have each other,” he said. 

“I wouldn’t want it any other way,” you yawned, feeling another wave of tiredness

“Sleepy time?” Joe chuckles. 

“Mhmmm,” you groan as you stretch out your arms. “Don't ever let me drink that much again,” you mumble as you pull the covers higher. 

“You got it. Goodnight, Y/N,” he smiles as he turns his head over to you. 

“Night, Joey,” you smile before turning over and letting out a deep breath. 

20 minutes passed by and you were still wide awake, not finding comfort in his bed which was odd considering it was like a cloud. Your thoughts about you and Joe were also keeping you from sleeping. Ever since your sister mentioned that you were acting like Joe’s girlfriend yesterday, your head was spiraling and the alcohol from tonight was making it worse. And the conversation you just had with him was making it even more confusing. Sure, you did some girlfriend-type things, but you knew he would never look at you that way. He saw you as a friend and that’s all, at least that’s what you thought. 

Suddenly, you felt Joe’s hand creep around your waist, pulling you into his chest. Your heart stopped and your body froze from the sudden movement. What the actual fuck was going on. 

“Joe?” You mumbled, not meeting his eyes because you were literally about to scream.

“Hm?” He mumbled, half asleep. 

“Your arm,” you whispered.

“I’m cold,” he muttered as he held you tighter. “And you’re so warm and comfy,”. 

Your heartbeat picked up again as you felt his big hand sprawled out against your belly, not to mention that your ass was literally on his crotch right now. His body, although saying he felt cold, was hot. So very hot. 

“Is this weird?” he mumbles, opening his eyes. He really hoped that this didn’t weird you out.

You stayed silent for a few seconds, not knowing what to say or do. You didn’t feel weird oddly enough as that sounded. Something about this felt natural and so right. 

“It’s okay,” you softly spoke. “I’m good,”. 

Joe smiled at your response, feeling like he was flying through the clouds right now as he was practically cuddling with his favorite person. Everything about this just felt so right, and he wasn’t the only one who thought so. 

“Good, you said you were a cuddler so I hope this is comfy,” he mumbled. 

You felt your heart exploding as he moved closer to you. His arm around you felt like a safety blanket, protecting you from everything on the outside. A comfortable embrace that you wished you had around you forever. It felt right.

“Trust me, it’s perfect,” you whisper, closing your eyes and losing yourself in his embrace, too tired from the night to fight back. 

A few moments later, you were fast asleep, finally feeling comfortable and it was all because of him. 

The next morning 

Your eyes slowly flutter open as the golden light shines through the windows. You reach out to grab your phone, the time reading 7:35 AM. You felt your head slowly start to throb, a sure result of your hangover from last night. You were just about to get up but you felt a heavy force holding you down. 

“What the-” you whisper as you look down, noticing Joe’s hand is still wrapped around your stomach. You had forgotten that you were at his house and in his bed, and he was still wrapped around you. 

“Uh oh,” you whisper. You turned your head around and saw Joe sound asleep, looking so adorable as his hair was sprawled out against the pillow and soft snores coming from his mouth. You remember that he brought you here after the party last night, which meant you had no way of getting back home. You didn’t want to wake him up because first, he looked so comfortable right now, and second, you didn’t know how to talk to him after what happened last night. Those thoughts you had about your relationship with Joe only got stronger after the night you had. Although nothing like that happened, your feelings for him surely got more complicated. 

“Don’t leave me,” you heard Joe mumble in his sleep. 

Your eyes widened at his soft words, was he talking about you? You turned your head around to see if he was awake, but he was still sound asleep and snoring again. He must’ve been sleeptalking, you thought to yourself. 

You pulled out your phone again, opening up your messages to beg your friend Lydia to come pick you up. She usually got up early on Saturdays for Pilates so she should respond.

You: emergency! please come pick me up 

Lydia: good morning to you too lol. everything alright? 

You: everything’s fine I just uhh need a ride home

Lydia: home? where are you?? 

You: joe’s house 

Lydia: oh 👀 

You sighed at your friend's text. Now was not the time to have this conversation and you knew exactly what she was going to say. You and Lydia had known each other since Ohio State so she pretty much knew everything about you and Joe’s friendship since you were all a part of the same friend group. She was a huge advocate for you and Joe to be a couple back at OSU, but you always shut her down before she could get too matchmaker-ish. She claimed that she saw something “special” between you two, but your ignorant ass brushed it off over and over, just like how you were doing now. 

You: just pls come pick me up

Lydia: on my way ;) be there in 10

You let out a relieved sigh as you carefully peeled Joe’s hand off from your waist, quickly replacing it with a pillow so he wouldn’t feel the difference, and thankfully he didn’t. You walked into the bathroom, grabbed your clothes from last night, and quickly exited his room. You glanced back at him for a few seconds, taking note of the smile on his adorable face and his arms wrapped tightly around the pillow that he thought was your waist. 

“Man,” you whispered to yourself as you turned back around and made your way down the stairs. 

You waited by the door for Lydia as your mind was exploding with thoughts now that you were sober enough to process everything. What the hell happened last night? Was Joe just being the usual Joe because something felt different about his mannerisms, words, and attitude toward you the entire night? And even this morning, his arm was still around your waist and seemingly wasn’t planning on moving it. 

You heard a car pull up and peeked out the window, seeing that it was your bestie. “Thank fuck,” you sighed as you had to escape the scene. You don’t know what you would’ve said to him once he had woken up. Especially since you were 100% in your senses now. 

You quickly opened the door, softly shutting it on your way out. You ran over to her car and hopped inside without a second thought. 

“Damn, you’re in a rush,” she laughs as she locks the door after you shut it. 

“No rush. Just uhh, need to get home,” you say as you buckle your seatbelt.

“Whatever you say,” Lydia giggles as she puts the car in drive. “So how was it?” She asks. 

“How was what?” You say, raising your eyebrows.

“The sex, dummy,” she laughs.

“What?” You shriek as your eyes widen.

“Don't play dumb with me, Y/N. Is he as good in bed as he is on the field?”. 

You stare at her for a few quiet seconds before breaking out into a fit of laughter. 

“Oh my god,” you laugh as you lean forward. 

“Took you long enough. I’ve been saying this would happen for yeaaaars,” she boasts. “Why else would you need me to come to pick you up from Joe’s house at 8 am while you’re wearing what definitely is his t-shirt and I assume no shorts and just panties underneath?” She adds. 

“You’ve got it all wrong,” you wheeze. “I was super drunk last night from the Christmas party and he just brought me to his place,”. 

“Ahh, so drunken sex? Even better,” she teases as she winks at you.

“Lydia, we didn’t hook up,” you say, your laughter dying down. “He just gave me his shirt so I wouldn’t have to sleep in my outfit from the party,”. 

“Okayyy sure, but that still doesn’t explain why you ran out of his house so early in the morning and why he couldn’t take you home,” she said. 

“That’s a long story,” you say, taking a deep breath and falling back into your seat.

“We’ve got time,” she laughs.

“I don’t really know,” you breathe out, staring up at the ceiling of the car. “My sister mentioned the other day that I’m acting like Joe’s girlfriend and it just got me thinking,” you sigh. 

“Oh?” She says, a smile forming on her face.

“And last night was weird. I feel like he was being extra affectionate but I don’t know if that was just the alcohol in my system messing with me. And he was talking to me about how he hadn’t found the right girl yet, how he brings me everywhere and that’s why people think we’re dating, and how I’m his ‘permanent plus 1’ because he likes having me around,”. 

“Ohhhhh?” Lydia drags out, her face scrunching up as she tries to hold back from saying something about it.

“Don’t get too excited. I already knew that the general public thought that we were together, but I thought we were over that,”. 

“You won’t be able to get over that until you admit the truth. And the truth is that you like him. Like more than just a friend,” Lydia blurts out. “I see it, the public sees it, and I honestly think Joe sees it too,”. 

You stay silent for a few seconds, a little taken aback by her observation and not knowing how to respond to her since you can barely make sense of your feelings.

“Oh my god? You like him don’t you?!” She yells as she looks over at you.  

“I don’t knowwww,” you said. “There’s a lot of thoughts in my head right now and I don’t know what to think. I feel like he’s been acting differently around me, like more lovey-dovey differently but I don’t know if I’m reading into it too much,” you respond. 

“Okay, well what are the thoughts in your head saying?”.

“That I think I like him? Or still like him I guess. But I don’t know if he feels the same and I don’t wanna say anything because if he doesn’t, it’ll fuck up our friendship and I can’t lose him,” you say. 

“He’s so sweet and perfect. Joe knows me better than anyone and knows exactly how to cheer me up, calm me down, and make me have fun. I’ve never met anyone like him before and being by his side since day 1 has been a dream but also crazy. And the fact that he hasn't changed since we met is even more crazy. Even with all the money, fame, and attention, he's still Joe. My Joe," you smile. “The same adorable, nerdy, football player that was my lab partner in chemistry freshman year,”.

“Girl, you definitely love him,” your friend says, looking over at you with a straight face.

“Love?” You ask, your heart skipping a beat. 

“Yes, love. You’ve known each other since freshman year of college and if I’m not mistaken, those feelings have been there since then. You’re doing the same thing you did back then, letting your overthinking get in the way. You’re too afraid of losing him as a friend, but Y/N, what if he has the same feelings as you? This isn’t a matter of liking a boy, it’s a matter of you being in love with someone who you’ve had feelings for since you both met. That’s years and years of unanswered feelings that were being built up inside of you and spilling out right now,”. 

Were you in love with Joe? Have you been in love with him all this time? You find yourself smiling as you imagine you and Joe as a couple. Waking up to his adorable smile and sexy morning voice every day, going on cute little dates with him every week around town, kissing him good luck before every game, getting to curl up on the couch with him after every game, and talking about anything and everything together for hours on end without any limitations. It all sounded like a dream, a dream you wished was reality. 

Lydia looked over at your face, seeing you with a huge grin on your face and a blush creeping up on your cheeks.

“I knew it. You love him,” she says as she playfully shoves your shoulder. "There is a reason why none of your relationships work out. The person who you've been waiting for has been right in front of you this entire time,".

“Again, I don’t know,” you giggle. “I don’t wanna say anything to him because I don’t know if he feels the same way,”.

“I get that, I do. You don’t want to risk your friendship, but here’s my advice. Go with the flow. If something’s going to happen, it will. If nothing’s gonna happen, it won’t. Let things unfold naturally and if he’s there and waiting for you at the door, open it and never let him leave,” she says. “And I have a feeling that he’s gonna be at the door,” she adds. 

You spent a few seconds thinking about her advice. She was right, if you weren’t overthinking it and he really did feel the same way about you, he would be there. And if you were overthinking it, and he didn’t feel the same, you would accept it, bury those feelings for real this time, and keep the ball rolling.

You just had to wait and see.

To be continued! 

part 2

[blackjackkent]

The time has arrived! Today Orin the Red becomes Orin the Dead.

I'd like to say that Hector is excited about it but the poor boy is just very tired and sad right now.

Let's get to it!

The Bhaalist entryway that we talked our way through last time opens into a wide underground area full of many bats and shattered stonework - what I assume is the temple of Bhaal.

If I was understanding the dialogue correctly from before, this is meant to be the same place where Caden faced down Sarevok in BG1, which is pretty exciting.

Walking further down the slope towards the temple, everyone immediately biffed a perception check one right after the other, at which point we're pretty much immediately beset by a number of Bhaalists, including this pleasant fellow:

Man, we already did the trial over at the Tribunal. XD Why so many trials, Bhaal?

Our buddy here - "Farslayer of Bhaal Ghislev" - opens the combat with a ritual casting of "Bhaal's Power Word Kill", which as near as I can tell gives us six turns to destroy him before he obliterates the whole group:

Mr. Ghislev is labeled "Death's Gatekeeper," which is pretty metal, and has some distinct advantages; he's hanging out on a far platform, has a number of stacks of invulnerability that have to be knocked off before he'll take damage, can't be moved by magical or physical means, and emits an "Aura of Murder" that gives nearby characters vulnerability to piercing damage.

He can also teleport all over the place, and has a number of buddies who can go invisible and do a lot of damage from range. This actually turns out to be quite a challenging battle, primarily because our group is very optimized for close-range combat and this arena is incredibly spacious. That opening surprise round is pretty brutal, too.

----

[some minutes later]

OK. Not as terrible as I thought it was at the beginning, but still fairly rough.

Jaheira REALLY suffered in this fight. Every single enemy on the field decided she was the main problem, despite her being our squishiest fighter; I suppose the owlbear transformation spooked them. She was never really able to get close enough to actually do damage to anyone and spent the whole fight being a large feathery pincushion for every arrow in the arena, but the bright side of this was that they weren't attacking the rest of the party, so fundamentally the wildshape just acted as a second health bar for her to soak up damage while the rest of the group was able to close distance enough to get some work done.

I ended up having Minsc on duty throwing things at all the adds while Hector and Karlach just beelined straight for the big boy and beat him up. His invulnerability stacks were annoying but not really a problem, since Hector and Karlach between them can hit almost ten times in a round, and once the stacks were gone he folded like tissue paper.

There were a LOT of enemies on the field, which had me pretty worried, but most of them were listed as "Entranced Murderer", and as soon as Ghislev went down, they ALL vanished off the enemy list, which was a huge relief.

So that wasn't so bad at all. :D Time to loot the place and continue deeper!

[ratatouillewastakendammit]

Hey!! So I’ve decided to actually start posting on this app more this Summer so I’m gonna begin with this Chrollo X Reader fic (that was written 3 years ago for AO3 during Covid so mind the not-so-good writing especially for the first few chapters) Not beta-read we die like Kurapika’s clan <3

Regrets: Chapter One

Fic warnings: here

Next chapter

Find the whole story here

Of course you were nervous.

Anyone probably would be.

Not about the problem though. You trusted him enough to understand he had everything under control.

However, if he was asking for help then it must be serious.

Anyway, it wasn't exactly the mission you were nervous about, but the person who had called you to it.

Years had gone by since you had seen Kurapika and it wasn't as if the two of you had ended things on good terms.

It hurt, walking away from each other.

Although, it couldn't be helped.

"I told you no."

"And I told you I'm not letting you get yourself killed when I can do something about it!"

That idiot wouldn't accept help from anyone, let alone you. He always wanted to do things himself, no matter how stupid that decision may be. So when he refused to let you come along and assist him after he had found the location of a certain group, you'd lost it.

Maybe he thought you were weak, or maybe he was scared for your safety, either way, that fact that he wanted to do it alone pissed you off. He was willing to put his life at risk for revenge, which you understood of course, but why couldn't you?

Kurapika was the only thing you had left. And maybe it was selfish for you wanting him to stay safe. If he died, who did you have left to live for?

"You're going to get yourself killed."

"And what happens when you same? What do I do then?"

When Kurapika's phone went silent, it felt like you were drowning. There was nothing left. You had no friends, no family. You hadn't made any allies in fear of being double crossed because of your economical value. You were skillful enough not to die, but was there really any point?

Thankfully, the information was fake and Kurapika was just sulking somewhere, but the damage had been done.

Stricken by pride and anger, you ignored him as he walked out the door, not wanting to be hurt like that again. Or maybe it was fear as well. You hadn't gotten close to anyone in between the years, after all.

That was probably it.

Fear of loving someone. And losing them.

So you had stayed away from others after watching him walk away, not wanting to experience that indescribable emptiness again. You had learned more about yourself, about nen, and how to survive. Obtaining a hunters license was quite easy, so it wasn't as if you needed a job when you could just stay in most hotels for free.

You had the potential to do great things maybe, but it was best to just stay away from others, keep a low profile.

Staying under the radar was easy, considering most people thought you were dead.

And you liked it that way.

Or, you tried to tell yourself you liked it that way.

So when Kurapika finally called you, it had been quite surprising, especially considering the years of silence in between your fight.

But how could you refuse your best friend?

XxXxX

Sunlight streamed through the thin leaves and stained windows, creating shaded shapes on the stone pavement. Birds chased each other midair, a small wind allowing them to float through the sky effortlessly. The same soft breeze lifted a piece of hair as you strolled forward towards your destination.

Looking up from the virtual map, you realized the building in front of you strongly resembled what Kurapika had described on the last call.

"You'll know when you see it. Big and silver. Lots of wealthy people will be going in and out."

A small sigh escaped your lip, each step seeming more and more like lead on your boots.

He said he would meet you in the lobby. Was he really less than twenty meters away?

An extremely small part of you wished he had walked away again, leaving a entryway filled with nothing but fake potted plants and snotty businessmen.

Unfortunately, that wasn't happening.

The moment you walked through the glass doors, your eyes hooked onto the blond head sitting on the couch. The boy was wearing his usual apparel of blue and gold, only this time a small red earring draped from his ear.

Now you were almost sure your feet were cement, completely glued to the floor.

The blond slowly turned his head, probably sensing some new presence. His eyes lit up, darkening slightly under the contacts, something only you would probably notice, and quickly rose to his feet.

"Y/n."

"Kurapika."

The name sounded a bit sour in your throat.

"Was the journey alright?"

You nodded.

"Would you like to go up to my room?"

You nodded again.

His eyes trailed your face, scouting for any sort of emotion. When he couldn't find any, he just sighed and beckoned for you to follow him into the elevator.

The ride was awful, silence stifling the air, making it almost impossible to breath. Walking down the hallway was also filled with that intoxicating quietness until Kurapika opened the door for you to pass through.

Marble floors reflected small beams of light that filtered through the shutters Kurapika had undoubtedly closed the moment he first unlocked the room.

He never was a big fan of windows.

A small smile tugged at your lips at the memory.

"But it doesn't make any sense! The natural light saves energy anyway."

"But you can't always be sure who's looking at us!"

"Why would anyone want to watch us? All we do is play games."

"Yeah, I guess you're right."

"I'm always right."

The same voice spurred you away from the thoughts, although you didn't exactly sure what it said.

"Huh?"

"You're mad at me. I don't like it." Kurapika sat down slowly on the bed, taking a second to collect his thoughts. "I just didn't want you to get hurt."

"Well, I could say the same thing, but did you listen?"

"I had to make sure they wouldn't hurt us aga-"

"And I thought you were dead!" Turning around, you glanced into the eyes of your former friend, not holding enough strength to let it be a glare. "I had to hear from someone else that you were still alive! Do you know how scared I was?"

Kurapika hung his head, something you only saw twice before. The first time was when his mother scolded him for leaving you alone outside, although nothing happened.

The second was when you had explained what occurred during the massacre.

"Why do you want to know?"

"Please."

"There's nothing you can do now!"

"I NEED TO KNOW!" Kurapika grabbed your shoulders, eyes blazing a deep scarlet. "I need to know what happened."

"Why? Why would you ever want to know?"

"I need to hurt."

...

"I need to hurt enough to kill the Phantom Troupe."

"I'm sorry."

The boy in front of you, the one once so full of life and happiness, sounded so guilty, so ashamed of himself, something that you never wanted to see.

Feet moving against any rational thought, you ran to your friend, hooking an arm around his shoulder and pulling his body into yours. At first, he stiffened in surprised at the touch, but slowly folded his hands behind you back, and pulling you close. It didn't even occur to you that the boy was crying until a tear dripped onto the top of your head, his clear, steely eyes now red and hot.

"I'm so fucking sorry."

"I know."

It was odd. You had promised only to help and leave without getting into the past again. Never wanting to feel so alone and scared again, you told yourself that you would assist in any way you could and make a quick exit without getting close to your childhood friend. You were naive to think anything remotely similar would happen like that, especially with overzealous emotions like yours.

"I'm sorry too."

"Why are you sorry?"

"Just am."

The two of you stayed in each others arms for quite a while, his tears drying on both your faces. For a moment, it almost felt like how it was all those years ago, when you were children. Kurapika holding onto you like this after a good nightmare, or once when you held your arms into his chest, just like you did now, after scraping your knee on a jagged stone.

Kurapika had then hurt himself in the same place, saying that if you had a 'cool' new wound, he wanted one too.

Of course, it wasn't hard to understand he didn't want you to be embarrassed in front of the other children about tripping over a small weed. He was also like that with you, despite being the younger one by a few years. Kurapika was your best friend, being inseparable since both of your mothers had introduced you. He knew everything about you and was part of every happy memory.

After the massacre, you thought you were alone. You felt absolutely empty. Then he emerged from the rubble, grabbed your shaking hand and dragged you away from the horrific scene.

"You shouldn't be. I'm sorry I let you down. I'm sorry I left, I was just scared."

"Me too. And I wasn't mad, I never was. Maybe I just thought if I tried acting like it, it would help with being so lonely. I kept to myself most of the time."

"Yeah." He replied. "I did the same, for the most part anyway."

"Most part?"

He nodded. "I met three of them during last years Hunter's exam. There's these two boys; they're very interesting."

"And the third?"

Pink began to slowly tinge Kurapika's cheeks as he turned away from you.

Not quickly enough, however.

"DID YOU MEET SOMEONE?"

"Don't be so loud."

"Oh shit!"

"Stop."

"You met someone!"

"I called you here for business."

You laughed, rolling you eyes and motioning for your friend to sit down. The bed shifted as the two of you sat back, facing the white hotel ceiling. You stayed like that, enjoying the silence.

It was odd how different this silence felt compared to the one in the elevator. That silence was deafening, strong enough to make you suffocate under it. This one was light, filled with peace and memories of what used to be.

It almost made you feel embarrassed, for all the years and experiences you could've had if only the fear and stubbornness had been so apparent. You were never really mad at him, the extremely quick forgiveness proved that. You trusted him with everything and maybe if you trusted his judgement back then too, you wouldn't be so emotionally detached now.

You continued to look at the ceiling, which was now illuminated by passing city lights of cars driving by through the darkness, then turned toward your side and looked at Kurapika.

"You called me here because you needed help, right? What do you need?"

Kurapika sighed and took a moment, but turned to face you nonetheless. "May we talk about it in the morning? It's getting late and I'm sure you're tired."

"If I let it go until tomorrow, will you tell me about the person you met?"

Silence.

"I'm only gonna keep asking until-"

"He wants to be a doctor..."

XxXxX

Shouting.

That was what woke you up.

And probably was what saved your life.

That was the first thing you remembered about that night, was the shouting.

The last thing you remembered were Kurapika's eyes.

Yours were wide and terrified, filled with enough sadness and pain to last a lifetime. His, however, were blazing with anger and hatred. Fire seemed to be pooling out of his irises, melting his retinas into dry tears.

The soft, kind boy you had grew up with looked like he was about to rip someone to shreds.

Those eyes, filled with pure fury, softened with relief however, when he saw you, sitting on the floor of your old childhood home.

The once happy cottage filled with the smell of cookies and the sound of laughter was now demolished, walls crumbling inward towards the living room. Pictures and tapestries were burning on the floor, edges of smiling faces beginning to char. All that was left was you, holding a body with shaking hands.

You remembered thinking she looked peaceful, maybe you could even pretend she was sleeping.

If you looked at her from the neck down, that is.

Blood flowed down her face from the hollow holes that were once home to bright eyes filled with life. The mouth that once sung you lullabies was now frozen into a horrified expression, her blood stained skin was now pale white forever. As a child, you idolized your mother, thinking she was the most beautiful woman you had ever seen.

Now, you could barely stand to look at her without the urge to vomit.

She was the one who had saved you. The nimble hands that taught you how a tie a shoelace had shoved you into that secret hole underneath the dresser so you were safe. You had begged and cried for her to stay with you, but she had simply smiled back, told you how proud she was, and planted a gentle kiss on your forehead before leaving. It was the last one you'd ever receive from her.

Kurapika slowly tugged at your shoulder, but you didn't move, petrified in the middle of this horrible nightmare. The air was hot and toxic, smoke poking at your eyes and filling your lungs.

Everything was gone.

"Come on. We have to go."

My life is over.

"Can you hear me?"

They're all dead.

He gently unhinged your fingers from the sides of your mother's face, shuddering as her head fell lifelessly onto your lap, but you still wouldn't move.

"Answer me!"

You looked up at the boy, relief spreading over your face, but it quickly faded as soon as it came. "I-I thought you were dead! Everyone... everythone is gone. They took everything."

The voice that came out seemed far away, hitching in your throat as you choked through tears.

"Who? Who did this?"

Another sob escaped your throat as you held up a singed piece of parchment.

"The Phantom Troupe."

XxXxX

"Wake up!"

You bolted upwards from a deep slumber, almost head-butting Kurapika, who thankfully dodged with ease.

"Huh?"

"You were mumbling something. I didn't know if you were having a nightmare."

"I guess so."

His eyes narrowed. "I thought you stopped having those."

"I have." You replied. "For the most part."

It had been the worst at the beginning. You had stopped eating, sleeping, even talking for weeks. The only reason you had lived was because Kurapika had forced you the bare minimum for survival. You were a walking corpse, slowly gliding through life, devoid of all emotion.

Then one day, you came to a realization.

Kurapika didn't deserve this.

After everything, the only people you had left in the world were each other and he needed you right now. So, you started eating and speaking in short sentences every once in a while. You even tried to sleep again, hoping to ease some of Kurapika's stress about you.

Then the nightmares came.

Every night was the same.

You would look up in a bathroom mirror, only to see the same bloody holes that had been pasted on the face of your entire clan. You began to panic, turning on the water and scrubbing your hands red in an attempt to wash off the blood. Then, you turned around.

But you weren't in the bathroom anymore.

Now, you were at the same spot again, your home completely destroyed and littered with the corpses of every family member and relative you had ever met. It was a exact image of that night, even the smell of burning wood and fabric seemed to make your nose twitch.

Except, something was different.

This time, Kurapika's body lay on the floor as well, eyes cut out of his skull, bruises on his neck from strangulation.

Usually, the real Kurapika would wake you up at this point from the cries and whimpers.

However, he wasn't there to help after he left.

So, the dreams continued, even if they grew further and further apart over time.

Then you learned about nen.

And they stopped.

Nen was something you had mastered surprisingly quickly. Your teacher, a kind man with glasses and dark hair named Mr. Wing, had even begun to express his concern for your learning style.

So you left again.

It was his fault for telling you what you could potentially do anyway.

In all honestly, you didn't know the difference between ten or ren or whatever else there was, but you did remember what Wing had said to you after that first lesson.

"Focus on the glass of water."

"Why?"

"Trust me. Put all your emotion into it, negative or positive, it doesn't matter."

You sighed, then began staring at the clear glass of liquid.

Memories flooded your brain as your eyes burned into the cup, images of fire and destruction playing on repeat. A small tear slipped down the side of your face when a picture of your mother blasted through your mind.

"Y/n, you can stop now."

Slowly, you refocused your eyes, which you had noticed blurred over slightly, and fixed your gaze back on the cup in disappointment.

"Nothing happened."

"I'm not so sure." Wing smiled and picked up the glass, holding his finger over the water. "If you taste it-"

The cup dropped to the floor, shattering over the wooden floor the second Wing dropped his finger in. He yelped in surprise, falling back a few steps and looking at his finger.

"Are you okay?" You jumped up and made your way over to him, attempting to avoid the broken shards of glass scattered across the floor. "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to!"

Wing looked up at you, eyes growing wide before looking back down in thought. "Stay here."

He then exited the room, merely pushing the glass out of his way with his shoe, only to return with a second cup of water.

It rippled as he sat it down on the table. "Do it again." His usually calm and positive voice was now deep and stern, overtaken by curiosity.

"But you just-"

"You were thinking of painful memories, correct? Try doing the exact same thing, but with happy ones."

"I don't know if-"

"Please. Just trust me, okay?"

Nodding slowly again, you fixed your gaze on the second glass, vision blurring instantly this time. Instead of the first instance, however, you tried your best to focus on anything happy. The good memories. You and Kurapika riding emus together and playing tricks on the village leader while Pairo, another childhood friend, watched with wide eyes. Or you and your mother baking cookies on a rainy day.

Of course, a few bad one snuck their way in, but for the most part, it was strictly good.

"Alright, you can stop now."

You opened your eyes to see Wing quickly take the glass and immediately plunge his finger into the water. His eyes widened in surprise once more, glancing back and forth between the glass and you.

"Incredible." He finally breathed.

"What? Did I do something wrong?" You asked in worry.

"No. No, nothing like that! I've just never seen something like this before."

"Oh... well is it bad?"

Wing stopped at your question and began thinking again for a moment before replying. "It could be. Possibly. But incredible nonetheless. Y/n, do you know what happened to me when I touched that water?"

He began pacing around the room while you shook your head.

"The first time. I expected that maybe you were a transmuter, but I didn't even have to taste it to see I was wrong. Every emotion you focused on in those five seconds of concentration I felt! Every bit of fear and pain and worry and I just had to dip my finger a centimeter in that water."

"I'm sorry, but I don't understand." His explanation about feeling your fear and pain made you shift uncomfortably on the couch in his apartment.

"And then the second time. Happiness. With bits of pain as well, but mainly happiness." The man stopped pacing and turned towards you.

"And what does that mean, sir?"

"I'm most led to believe you're a Transmuter, however you also possess some Manipulator abilities, which are quite rare." The man took another breath. "Normal nen, like everyone else's, is fueled by emotions, Y/n. However, your emotions are the center of it."

"And that means..."

"Usually, nen users develop some sort of special ability. However, yours seem to already be starting, even in the grouping process, maybe due to the strong nature of your emotions. Your emotions are your nen, something extremely powerful since emotions usually just fuel it. Your feelings are your special ability and with something like that...

The possibilities could be endless."

But you had left.

Maybe it was also because Wing began to catch onto why you were so enamored with learning new abilities.

With the power you received, came many amazing things. You began to control the emotions of others, therefore influencing their behavior and personality. Sometimes, with enough concentration and right wording, your abilities could be considered borderline mind control.

For example, if you wanted someone to hurt another, you were able to send an immeasurable amount of anger to person one directed towards person two.

Another strategy was using seduction.

By filling an individual with love or lust directed at you then simply giving a demand, they usually followed you every word.

"Doing that would make me so happy. And you want me to be happy, right? Don't you care about me?"

There were multiple other ways to use emotion to achieve power over people, some more effective than others, especially since each individual had difference strengths or weaknesses. Your power was very useful nonetheless.

However, as with any ability, it did have its setbacks.

Controlling an advanced nen user meant more energy taken out, meaning you could deplete your powers pretty quickly. Usually, you let out some sort of sound, which was a low hum or verbal order more often than not. This allowed ground yourself and command someone while still focusing stamina into the actual nen itself. Sometimes, if you tried too hard, you would just zone out and begin fading into whatever memory was sparking the wanted emotion. The louder the sound translates to more control over yourself and your own strength.

[raspberry-rampage]

if it's not intrusive, how's the pupper? I hope she's doing well

Thanks for asking! TL;DR she's okay!

Sorry for replying only now, been busy with adult problems. Also I've been living in the state of constant hypervigilance of her health and it's exhausting, but that's what having a dog baby (that's elderly but still baby) is like.

Checked when the last update was - before the check up. Passed the fact that I pretty much spent 1k on her in almost two weeks (goodbye my savings), the vet said it generally looked better, her meds got adjusted and I should contact them if there are changes. So far, since that visit, she had two "seizures", one or two days when she went on a hunger strike (which may be health related but more likely she just got upset she wasn't getting her favourite brand of wet food, so sorry you have to eat other things you spoilt idiot), she's often very tired and moody but the latter is nothing new. Oh, and she lost a tooth, exact date unknown - I only know cause it's' a bottom front one, now out of six she only has four left. You can see it here, it's her scary face.

Can you believe her face used to be all black? It's funny how grey she got, and she started greying with her eyelashes. Pekes have a very specific kind of beauty to them, I've seen people call them creepy for having such big eyes but to me she's the cutest. She hates everyone but my close family (meaning not all relatives are safe from her ankle biting), if you pick her up she's limp like a ragdoll, she loves sleeping in the middle of entryways and gaps between furniture.

I know that she's not going to live a long time now, not with all the heart issues, but I want to make it as comfortable for her as possible. She's my first dog and she's the smartest stupid animal out of all I've owned. She has a funny relationship with my other pets (yorkie and cat) and I think they will be sad too when she passes away. Hopefully it will be painless and at home.

Anyways, it got grim, my ramblings usually end up that way. Again, thanks for asking and the wishes! It was nice to get this off my chest.

[lou-struck]

Little Rose

Barbatos x Reader

~ Barbatos has been working himself too hard and Diavolo asks you to distract him for awhile.

WC: 1.4k

Late birthday post for our cute little Butler.

Ever since you came to the Devildom, your time has been occupied by the Brothers, the other exchange students, and even Lord Diavolo. But there is someone who has always been keeping their distance from you, the Demon Butler Barbatos.

You find yourself drawn to him but on the rare occasion you find yourself alone with the Demon, he suddenly excuses himself claiming that there is some sort of urgent matter he must attend to immediately. Initially, you understood, but time and time again you realize that he finds an excuse to leave the minute he is alone with you. It stings a bit, especially since you have developed quite the little crush on him. The antics of those around you are able to lift your spirits partially, but you are unable to completely forget about Barbatos’ apparent dislike of you.

~

Lucifer has been up to his ears in paperwork all day so you offered to take a few documents over to the castle to give to Diavolo.

The interior of the castle is spotless as always, but everything looks cleaner than normal.

You make your way through the glistening corridors until you end up just outside the Demon Lord’s office.

The massive door stands menacingly over you as you knock tentatively for entrance.

“Come in,” a deep voice calls from inside as the doors magically open on their own. Stepping inside you see the young Lord sitting at his desk filling out just as much paperwork as Lucifer is back at the House of Lamination. “Ah, Mc. It’s great to see you.” Diavolo says warmly, giving you a big smile. “What brings you to my office today.”

You hold up the large bundle of documents that you have been carrying. “I have a delivery, Lucifer says you’ll be needing these,” you explain setting the pile on the one bare corner of his large desk.

“I see,” he laughs, “He must be as busy as I am then. Thank you for taking time out of your day to bring these to me. You’re a big help.”

His praise and jovial attitude bring a smile to the corner of your lips. “It was no problem at all, I’m glad I could help,” you say turning to leave the Prince to his paperwork.

Just as you reach out to the hand he calls out to you. “Wait, mc. If you don’t mind I have a favor to ask of you?”

The idea of you being able to do anything to help out the Prince of the Devildom is beyond you. Turning around you curiously raise a brow. “What is it?”

“It’s Barbatos,” he says, clasping his hands together. “He has been working too hard lately. I don’t know why but he just keeps cleaning the same things over and over."

You think back to the obnoxiously clean entryway that you passed on your way only Barbatos is capable of such precision. "I see," you say. “What would you have me do?"

"Would you ask him to take a break?" he says with a sigh, "I would ask him myself but he would think it was an excuse for not getting my own work done."

"I can ask him, but I don't think he would listen to me," you say sullenly. As fond as you are of the Butler, you feel his feelings towards you may work against you in this task.

Diavolo cracks a smile, "I think he would listen to you mc. Don't sell yourself short. The influence you have on all of us is nothing if not extraordinary."

You have no idea what he means by that, but his word of encouragement put some much-needed pep in your step as you leave the prince to get his work done. You search the Castle for Barbatos following the trail of exceptionally polished floor tiles and near-translucent window panes all the way to its massive kitchen.  There you find him furiously polishing the silverware.

"There you are Barbatos,” you say from the doorway. He breaks his concentration and jolts up suddenly Upon meeting your eyes he remains his composure and gives you a polite smile.

“Mc, you startled me. I didn't hear you come in at all.” he says “Is there something that you need?”

You nod your head. "Yes, I was hoping you would like to take a break and get out of the Castle.”

Barbatos raises an eyebrow. "A Break?" he asks, his shoulders slumping at the prospect. "The Young Master put you up to this, didn't he? He's too thoughtful, but I have much to do."

"Like what? polishing the silverware for the millionth time today?" you tease gesturing to the glistening pile of silver. "It's not just Diavolo, I'm worried that you're working yourself way too hard."

His cheeks turn a bit pink at your words, "You were worried about me?“

“ Of course, I was,” you reply. “ Does this mean that you will put down the polishing cloth and take the rest of the day off with me?“

“ It seems I have been a little too preoccupied with my duties.“ he sighs defeatedly, placing the rag on the countertop. "How about we go for a walk then? The rose garden is in full bloom, it should be quite lovely to look at."

You give him a nod, Barbatos takes your hand and leads you out of the kitchen, through the palace, and out into the garden. Your hands feel sweaty with his proximity but you are thankful that his white gloves prevent him from knowing as much.

The Garden is in full bloom as roses in all sorts of colors surround the two of you. The air is filled with their sweet scents.

"Do you like the Roses?" he asks with a smile.

"They are beautiful," you respond, inspecting the blossoms closely. One rose in particular stands out above the rest to you, it's multicolored petals and almost metallic-looking thrones capture your attention easily. "This one in particular.”

He smiles gently leaning in to smell the rose, “This one reminds me of you actually, This rose started out as just a normal seed, but after being brought from the Devildom to the Human world the seed began to change.”

“How does that remind you of me?" You ask curiously. A familiar heat begins to blossom on your skin at the idea of him comparing you to such a beautiful flower. Maybe the relationship between you and Barbatos isn't as poor as you'd once thought it was

"Because of you, I believe we have changed for the better. The Brothers, the young lord, and myself." His green eyes sparkle at his omittance as he takes your hand. "You are my Little Rose."

Your heart feels like it's about to burst out of your chest. "Thank you...Barbatos, But if that's the case, why does it seem like you’ve been avoiding me?" you pause and look at the Demon in front of you. "Every time we are alone together you excuse yourself."

He stares at you for a moment, "I didn't think you would notice my absence Mc, I apologize for being so impolite. Please don't think its because I am not fond of you, it's quite the opposite. Demons are naturally greedy creatures,” he says "I want to spend time with you but I have to refrain myself from giving in to my desires and spending every waking moment with you, especially since I am unsure of your desires." His eyes widen at the depth of his confession and he starts to take a step backward away from you.

In a flustered panic, you lunge forward to grab his hand. "They're the same," you blurt "my feelings are the same as yours."

He tightens his grip on your hand "Is that the truth?"

"Yes," you breathe. The wave of relief that washes over your body is incomparable... Barbatos likes you.

"If that's so, I want to do this the right way." he smiles “I want to care for you Mc, I already do. But will you please allow me to act on these desires?”

You nod as he carefully tilts your chin upwards with his gloved hand as presses his lips softly to your own. He pulls back with a newfound light in his ageless eyes. "I'm sorry my Little Rose, I can't be satisfied with just one kiss. I'll need to take another."

[thebluenoteblog]

Chasing After You

Summary: Matthew just can’t let you go, no matter how hard he tries. Unluckily, you have the same problem.

Player: Matthew Tkachuk

Word Count: 2000

Warnings: I don’t know... a lot of drinking. A few bad words.

Authors Note: Be gentle, this is the first thing I’ve written in a really long time. It might be (probably is) a dumpster fire.

You come over when your wine's all gone

Always catch me when I'm not that strong

Then you wind up staying all night long

Ain't nothin' new

Matthew had finally reached rock bottom, he had to admit that, though to no one other than himself. Sitting home alone on a Friday night. No game to play, no practice to keep his mind busy, no friends to hang out with. Just him, a beer, the temptation of something stronger, and nothing on the TV. 

It was really pathetic. The guys wouldn't believe it if they saw him right now. Or maybe they would. Maybe pathetic was his new style, it was certainly starting to feel like it after all.

He grabbed the remote off the couch beside him and began to flip channels, eventually settling on a baseball game. He wasn’t paying close enough attention to the game to tell you the score, he wasn't sure he even knew what teams were playing. 

Just a few minutes into the game that he was sort of watching, there was a knock on his door. He checked his watch, 10:34. You were earlier than usual. 

He pushed himself up off the couch and made his way to the front door of his apartment. He knew it was you. You were the only one the front desk let up without calling him. He still didn't know how you had managed that. Did you sweet talk the workers? Probably. 

He pulled the door open and there you were, bottle of wine in hand. “I finished one already, but I thought you might be open to having a drink with me.”

There were a thousand alarm bells going off in his head, but he stepped aside and let you into his apartment. You kicked off your shoes in the entryway and followed him into the living room. Neither of you bothered with grabbing glasses, you uncorked the bottle and took a sip before passing it to Matthew.

He knew where this was going, he always did. He couldn't tell you why he never stopped it. Or maybe he could. Maybe he knew and he didn't want to admit that even after everything you had done to hurt him over the years, he was still unbelievably, irrevocably in love with you. 

Then I wake up with you on my chest

You got a way of making me forget

Girl, with you the answers always yes

Every time you call

He was warmer than usual. It took him a minute to register you in his arms, head positioned comfortably on his chest. The way you used to sleep almost every night but now reserved for nights that you’d downed your alcohol a little to quickly.

Matthew was afraid to move, he knew that as soon as he stirred you, you’d be out the door just as quickly as you'd walked through it the night before. Just like that you would burst his bubble all over again. Just like you had a hundred times before. 

Eventually your eyes fluttered open and he watched as you scanned the room, taking in where you were. “Morning,” he said. 

You smiled, “Morning.”

The smile gave him hope that he squashed down just as quickly as it appeared. “Stay for breakfast?” He asked.

You shrugged, “Do I have to cook it?”

“I’ll order in,” He laughed softly. He would never let you cook for him again if that was all it took for you to stay. It wasn't, but he could dream.

You nodded, “I’m going to take a shower. What time do you have practice?”

Matthew glanced at the clock on the bedside table. “I’ve got a few hours still.”

You pushed up off his chest and he immediately missed the warmth of your body. He wanted to tell you to come back, just for a little while longer but he knew better. So he let you go, because having you in his shower was better than having you in an uber on the way back to your apartment. 

But I know, yeah I know it's a matter of time

'Till you walk, 'till you walk back out of my life

Leave me standing here lonely feeling like a fool

You stretched up on your tiptoes and pressed a kiss to Matthew’s lips. It was soft, barely there. “I’ll call you.”

He knew you wouldn’t.

He nodded, “Text me when you get home safe.”

You nodded. “I will.”

He knew you wouldn’t.

You turned away from him and he watched as you disappeared down the hallway toward the elevator. When he couldn't see you anymore, he pushed the door closed and made his way back to the living room. 

Here he was again, a fucking idiot with a broken heart and nothing but time to kill.

Every time, every time you say we're done

You come back to the love you were running from

Don't know why, don't know why I let you but I do

Guess I love chasing after you

Matthew glanced down at his phone, tuning out the guys as he scanned the message, What are you doing tonight?

He typed out a response before anyone could realize who he was talking to. Nothing important.

Your response was almost immediate, I’ll be over in an hour.

Matthew rose from his seat and shoved his phone into his pocket. “Hey guys, I’ll catch you later.”

Johnny sighed, “Don't do it man, you're going to regret it.”

Matthew shook his head, “You have no idea what you're talking about.”

They looked at each other before turning back to him, “Man, this is getting ridiculous. She isn't good for you.”

“How do you know what's good for me?” Matthew asked, crossing his arms and widening his stance. “I think I can protect myself, I'm a big boy.”

Johnny sighed and waved a hand in his general direction, “Whatever, do what you want. Just don't come whining to me when she disappears again.”

Matthew snorted, “I don't plan on it.”

Then he was gone, phone in hand calling an uber.

Listen

Wish I could quit you but it feels too good

If I could turn it off, you know I would

But somethin' 'bout you makes me think we could

Make it after all

There was nothing in the world that made you angrier than your inability to walk away from Matthew. After everything the two of you had put each other through, there was no reason to keep going back. Yet… here you were. Standing outside his apartment after what was essentially a booty call.

You almost wished that Matthew would tell you to fuck off just so you could move on with your life. He wouldn't do that though, you knew Matthew too well and he knew you too well too. That was the problem. You had been with each other on some level for so long that you couldn't remember what it was like to be apart.

You hadn’t knocked yet, you could still leave. Go home and do the responsible thing for once. 

“Y/N.”

You turned toward the elevators, and there was Matthew. He looked amazing, t-shirt tight over his chest and shoulders, hair just a little bit in his eyes, the way you loved. There was no chance that you were leaving now. You were in this for the night now, not that this was bad news. You had never intended on leaving without seeing him.

“You’re early.” He said, running his hands through his hair.

“Yeah, I know,” You said, “I was bored.”

He nodded, “I can fix that.”

But I know, yeah I know it's a matter of time

'Till you walk, 'till you walk back out of my life

Leave me standing here lonely feeling like a fool

Why did he always think it would be different? Why was he always so determined to let himself think that there was a chance things would work out this time or next time or the time after that. There was no logical reason to believe that after all this time, anything would change, yet here he was, once again, surprised on some level that you had left him high and dry.

He closed the door, you had long since disappeared into the elevators, and he collapsed onto the couch. There was no way he would be hearing from you again for a while, so he buried his face in the throw pillow and decided to take a long nap.

After all, he had gotten no sleep the night before.

Every time, every time you say we're done

You come back to the love you were running from

Don't know why, don't know why I let you but I do

Guess I love chasing after you

You were always the one to end things. You had never, in your life, had your heart broken. You never let things get that far. You loved love, but you hated the idea of being hurt. So you kept everyone who tried to love you at a distance. Matthew was no exception, in fact he was the blueprint. There was no way you could ever give him your whole heart, there was no way you could ever trust him with a part of you that you had never given to anyone.

Oh, but you wanted to. More than anything, you wanted to give him every part of you in every way. You knew he loved you, on some level you knew that he would never hurt you, but here you were, three years into a mess of your own creation with no idea how to fix it.

“Y/N, I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me.”

You glanced up from your hands, eyes scanning the massive wall clock hanging above your therapists desk. Your appointment would be over in twenty minutes and you had yet to say a word to her. “I don’t know where to start today.”

She nodded, “What is bothering you today? Let's start with that.”

You sighed, “Matthew.”

“What about him?” She asked, tapping her pencil on the notepad that rested on her crossed legs.

You resisted the urge to sigh again. “I just…” You looked down at your hands, “I wish that I could let myself be happy with him.”

You come over when your wine's all gone

Always catch me when I'm not that strong

Then you wind up staying all night long

Ain't nothin' new

Two firm raps on the door had Matthew freezing as he poured his drink. He set the bottle down and made his way to the living room. He pulled the door open and there you were, beautiful as ever. Hair pulled up in a messy bun, hands in the pocket of your coat. “Hey, Matthew.”

Matthew smiled his eyes wondering over you, memorizing every inch as he stepped out of the way to let you into the apartment. “No wine this time?”

“No, no wine tonight..”

He laughed as he pushed the door closed behind you. “It's okay, I have some.”

You kicked off your shoes by his front door before turning to face him. “Actually, I was thinking maybe we could try this sober tonight.”

Matthew stared at you, his expression some strange mix of confusion and hopefulness. “Why?”

You opened your mouth to respond, but no words came out. You wanted to tell him that you were working on your shit, that you were trying to be less scary and damaged, but you couldn’t find the words or the courage to share that with him. Instead, what came out of your mouth was a joke, “What, do you have to be drunk to enjoy my company?”

The corners of his mouth slowly turned up, “No, not at all.”

He followed you into the living room and took a seat beside you on the couch. Like always he gave you space. This time you scooted closer to him. His eyebrows rose for a split second, then he put an arm around your shoulders and grabbed the remote from the end table. “Want to watch a movie? I hear there’s some new Netflix original thats really good.”

You nodded and sank into his side as he scrolled through the selections.

Maybe this wasn't so scary.

Maybe you could get used to this.

[beauvibaby]

there won’t be anyone else — t.seguin

a/n: obviously my timeline isn’t going to be accurate, and I know he went back to Canada for a large portion of his recovery but this is what worked… should I do a part 2???

Part two here!

summary: tyler asks his best friend to stay with him and his daughter during his recovery

word count: 5.2k

tagging people who interacted with my post: @i-am-a-lost-girl16 @mandypants95 @fallinallincurls @sidscrosbyy @myhockeyworld87 @lilyhood22 @joeyisourranger @je-ne-regrette-rien @youngbeezer @slimdebrusk

“Y/N?” Tyler spoke nervously, you tore your eyes off of the six month old in your arms, she gurgled in complaint as she grabbed at your face, “what’s up?” You asked him, shushing his daughter as she kept pinching your face. He smiled at the sight of you two, “I have to have a couple of surgeries, big surgeries, and I’m going to need a lot of help with Willow.” He explained, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck, “do you think you could come stay with us for a while?” He finally asked, you nodded instantly, you’d known Tyler ever since he came to Dallas. Long before he ended up as a single father to little Willow. “Of course, Ty.” You assured him, “anything you guys need.” You added, giving him a soft smile as Willow reached for her daddy. “Hi baby girl.” He grinned, smothering her in kisses, “glad you finally wanted to come back to me.” He teased her, holding her above his head as she giggled, the sight alone melted your heart as she grabbed at his beard the second it was in reach. “When is the surgery?” You asked him, you were fortunate enough to run an online shop, so really, as long as you could bring your supplies to his house, which you knew he’d have no problem with, you’d be set.

“Next week,” he paused, glancing over at you, “in New York.” He rushed his words together. “New York?” You gasped, eyes going a little wide. “You don’t have to come!” He stated, “my mom is going to meet me there, and then she’ll fly with me back here.” He explained, “I’ll be gone for a little over a week, then I can rehab here.” He added, realizing he didn’t explain anything very well. “Are you sure you don’t want us there?” You asked, motioning to Willow who was happily laying on his chest, gurgling away, probably close to taking a nap since she just ate. “I do, I really do, but it’s not worth the hassle, she’ll be happier here.” Tyler sighed, resting his chin on top of her head. “I’ll send you a bunch of pictures and videos of her, promise.” You laughed softly, thinking of how crazy this recovery is going to be for him. “You’re going to do great.” You assured him, seeing the wheels turning in his head, “I’m sure of it, and I’ll do anything I can to help.” You murmured, running a hand through your hair as all he could do was muster up a smile.

***

Day 1.

Tyler’s mom FaceTimed you that night, once he was coherent enough to remember seeing his daughter. “Hi, Mrs. Seguin.” You spoke softly, Willow looking around with wide eyes on your lap, you flipped the camera to show her, “Tyler.” His mom mumbled, handing the phone over, he looked exhausted but the way his eyes lit up when he saw Willow, she’d just had a bath so she was only in a diaper, showing off her chunky little legs. “Hey, Willow, hi baby.” He spoke, she focused in on the phone, rapidly swatting at it as she recognized his face. You giggled, moving her around to be sitting more on your chest, her face next to yours. “Say hi.” You cooed to her, waving her hand for her, she bounced excitedly as he smiled at her.

Day 2.

He was a little grumpy that day, but tried not to show it as he got to see Willow via FaceTime again, you knew he was already tired of being unable to move.

Day 3.

You were talking to him encouragely as he walked for the first time in three days, Willow sleeping in her room, Tyler’s mom held the phone out in front of her. You knew it had to be hard for her as well, to see her son like this, all because he was playing the sport he loved. You took some time to talk to her as the nurses helped Tyler get back in bed.

He didn’t feel up to talking again that day so you were sure to send him photos and videos of Willow, she was finally sitting up on her own without falling over.

The next week went on like that until he was finally coming home, luckily it was right during Willow’s long afternoon nap, so you could help him get settled and get everything in order before his mother had to leave to catch a flight tonight.

***

“Hey, Tyler.” You smiled, opening the car door, greeting him brightly, he tried to mimic your eyes excitement, but you could tell it didn’t quite meet his eyes. “Hey.” He mumbled, letting out a soft groan as you helped him get out and onto his feet, he gave his mom a hard time about using the wheelchair, you could see the pain floating in her eyes, just overly worried that he would fall. “I’ve got him, Jackie.” You assured, walking directly beside him as he hobbled with his crutches, she nodded, grabbing the bags out of the car as you helped him get inside the house.

“Thank you.” He sighed, leaning into the couch cushion as you put a pillow under his leg. You just gave him a reassuring smile, his mom dropping the stuff by the entryway, “be easy on her, I know it’s hard for you, but imagine if you saw Willow like this.” You added in a whisper, understanding came across his face as he nodded, motioning for her to sit beside him, you let them have their moment as you grabbed his bags and brought them to the room he’d been staying in, on the first floor for now, until stairs weren’t a questionable decision.

You put the clothes in the laundry, and moved some stuff down to the guest room, humming softly as you did this stuff without question, just doing it to be helpful, not thinking of how much the small gesture would really mean to him.

After a while, you peeked in on Willow and she was still sleeping soundly with her arms above her head, you smiled, carefully shutting the door to the nursery and heading down the stairs with the monitor, Jackie had to get going if she was going to make it to the airport in time. So you both said your goodbyes, and you could tell it was hard for Tyler to let her leave like that, but what was he to do, she has a life to get on with as well.

“How has she been while I was gone?” Tyler asked, looking at Willow on the monitor, his heart clenching in his chest, wanting nothing more than to hold his baby girl again. “She was good, Ty.” You giggled, easing his nerves, he nodded, “thank you, so much, I know we just started the recovery process but you’ve already helped so much.” He explained, adjusting himself on the cushions, “you don’t have to keep thanking me, I’m happy to help, I love spending time with her, and you.” He smiled at your words, giving you the side eye as you turned away in embarrassment. You two had always been flirty, but once he came to you and said that was going to be a dad, he changed, he stopped going out, he spent his time at home, and it only made it easier for you to imagine a life with him. “We like spending time with you too.” He whispered, resting his hand on your knee right before Willow started to cry. You could tell he briefly forgot he couldn’t go get her as he went to sit up but then stopped himself. “Don’t worry, I’ll get her.” You hopped up, excited to see her when she finally got to see him for the first time in over a week, you took the stairs two at a time as you heard her crying get more intense.

As you picked her up, you completely forgot that Tyler had the monitor, and could hear and see you tending to her. “Oh my goodness.” You cooed, scooping her up, “your daddy is so excited to see you.” You grinned, kissing her chubby cheeks, making a brief face of disgust as you got a whiff of her diaper, “let’s get you cleaned up first.” You whispered, grabbing her a new outfit, this one having dealt with a small blowout. You quickly changed her and put her in her little jean shorts and a pink shirt, if it wasn’t for you, you were certain Tyler wouldn’t have anything girly for her to wear. He was watching the whole time as you took care of her like she was your own, his heart swelling in his chest, he’d always had a thing for you, but as he saw you with his baby, it only made him fall harder. And he became determined to make you his by the time he was back to playing.

He turned the monitor off and shimmied himself to be sitting up more properly as you came down the stairs, “who is that, Willow?” You gasped, pointing towards Tyler, she began to bounce in your arms. “It’s daddy.” You grinned at her, walking over to him and allowing him to take her. He breathed out in relief, “I missed you so much, baby girl.” He groaned, hugging her tightly, she pushed on him so she could lean back and look at him, she looked at him with a completely serious face before trying to bite his nose. He broke into a fit of laughter as he moved her away from his face, “that’s not nice princess.” He joked, tickling her sides, she giggled swinging her little legs as he lifted her up. “I swear she grew in a week.” He mumbled, sitting her on his good side, she sat on the couch, chewing on her hands and getting drool everywhere. “And she sits now.” He groaned, dramatically resting his head in the couch, she mimicked him and fell into the cushion. “Crazy girl.” You commented, taking the chance while she was distracted to tie up the top part of her hair, she definitely had his hair and all it did was fall in her eyes. Tyler smirked at you, you rolled your eyes at him, “now she looks like a real little princess.” You quipped to him, he faked a gasp, dramatically hoisting her into his chest. “How dare Y/N say that about my princess.”

It was a lot of extra work, and mess, but you brought her jar of food and bib to the couch so Tyler could feed her, knowing it was one of his favorite times with her as she was so smiley. “Have you ever tried this?” Tyler asked curiously as you sat beside him with her in your lap, she happily ate the spoonful of puréed apples, peas and beets. “Baby food?” You asked with a laugh, he nodded, pushing some more into her gummy smile, she gnawed on the spoon as he tried to take it away. “No, I haven’t.” You answered as you contained your laughter, “I tried it once, I figured it couldn’t be so bad, and it was even worse than bad.” He explained, carefully prying the spoon from her hands, she pouted at him, about to cry until he gave her the last bite and let her chew on the soft rubber spoon. “I’m sure it was.” You snickered, lightly wiping around her mouth, “when’s that first tooth gonna come in? Hmm.” He spoke to her, rubbing her little tummy as she burped, he smiled at her, the love he had for her was something only a father and daughter could share, and it was beautiful as you could see the concern on his face as she began to whimper. You let him take her as you went to get rid of the jar and spoon, coming back with her bottle.

“I just changed her, so she should be good for a while after this, is it alright if I go get some work done?” You asked him, he easily nodded as he laid her back on his chest, holding the bottle up to her lips as she eagerly started sucking on it. “Yeah, of course.” He spoke, not hearing you had already started walking away once he nodded, he smiled as you were tying your hair up sloppily while you walked, something you’d always done when you were getting focused on a project.

He turned on the golf channel, sinking into the couch with Willow as she fell asleep once her bottle was empty, he laid her down in the cushion beside him, boxing her in with a rolled up blanket and leaving his hand resting on her as he himself fell asleep.

***

Tyler had been home for a couple of weeks, physical therapy had been stepping up a lot, which meant he was incredibly sore by the time he got home, and incredibly stubborn. He figured, if he could do it just fine with a doctor walking beside him, there was no reason he couldn’t walk ten feet into the bathroom. Well, he quickly found out he was wrong as he stumbled from a pain in his hip and ended up on his knees, cursing as he couldn’t push himself up. You heard him fall, then the sounds of him cursing to himself and you shot up. “Tyler!” You called, rushing towards his room, he felt his cheeks flush with embarrassment as you rounded the corner. “Hey, hey, are you ok?” You gasped kneeling beside him. He shook his head, slumping against the wall in defeat, “what’s wrong?” You asked, looking over him, trying to make sure he didn’t pull any stitches, or injure himself again. “I just can’t get up.” He muttered, slamming his fist on the wall. “I’m a fucking professional athlete and I can’t stand up on my own!” He snapped, he thought you’d move away at the tone of his voice, but you didn’t, you only moved closer, wrapping your arms around him in a hug. “I know, Ty. It’s going to be ok.” You whispered, his breathing was ragged as he finally gave in and hugged you back. He calmed down as you just stayed there, letting him hug you as tight as he needed, you pushed his curly mop of hair back once he completely calmed down. “You ready to get back up again?” You whispered, he nodded watching you stand up and give him your hands. “Just push with your good leg, alright.” You gently reminded him, stepping a little sideways to give your feet some traction. “One, two, three.” You pulled on his hands as he slid up, his back against the wall steadying him, he planted both feet on the ground, you quickly grabbed his crutches.

“I’ll just wait until you’re back in bed.” You mumbled, taking a seat on the edge of the bed, he nodded, hobbling to the bathroom right outside the room. Your adrenaline high quickly crashed as you waited for him, and you found yourself laying flat on the bed as you waited.

Tyler came back into the room, stopping in the doorway as he saw you stretched out on half of the bed. A smile came over his face as you shifted in your sleep, burying half your face in the pillow, inhaling softly as you felt at peace. He didn’t wake you, he couldn’t bring himself too, so he carefully got into the opposite side of the bed, the thumping in his chest so loud he was certain you could feel it as you subconsciously rolled towards him, resting your hand on his chest as he threw the blanket over you.

Eventually, morning came, and when you woke up in the empty bed, the events of last night came rushing back and you leaped out of bed, not only was Willow crying from her room, but you didn’t see Tyler anywhere, you instantly became worried he’d fallen again and you’d slept right through it. “Y/N?” Tyler called as you went rushing past the kitchen looking for him. “Tyler!” You gasped in relief, placing a hand over your chest as you saw him pouring a cup of coffee. “I thought you fell again, oh my god, where did you sleep? Oh, the baby, let me get the baby!” You rambled heading for the stairs, he chuckled as he listened to you stomp up them, Willow’s crying soon stopping as you picked her up.

He was feeling a little better today, so he managed to get Willow’s morning bottle ready, and some toast for himself, settling himself at the table as you came down the steps. Your hair was tangled in itself, you didn’t have makeup on, and you were in oversized sweats and a tank top, but you’d never looked better to him as you giggled with his daughter on your hip.

You called his name as you walked into the kitchen, spotting him at the table, he didn’t answer, but his eyes were pointed in your direction, “Tyler?” You called again, snapping your fingers. He blinked, “what? Sorry.” Tyler muttered sheepishly, “did you want eggs?” You asked him, eyeing him suspiciously as you maneuvered Willow in your arms to give her her bottle. She happily started drinking it as you propped it up on your cheek, pulling the eggs out of the fridge. “Give her to me.” Tyler chuckled, making grabby hands for her as you struggled to balance everything, you happily gave her over, glancing back as he cooed down to her, whispering a good morning as he kissed her messy head of his hair, they looked so like in that moment, Tyler with his hair sticking all over the place, and Willow with hers pushed to the side from you, with a clip barely holding it back.

“I’m not sure if you’re up to it, or if you want to, but I was going to go to the pumpkin patch later today, if you and Willow want to come?” You offered, “I know you hate having to use that wheelchair but it would be so fun to see her next to all those giant pumpkins.” You raddled on, giving Tyler the chance to admire you, “yeah, that sounds fun.” He answered, smiling when you turned to face him excitedly, “I’m sure you have some cute outfit for her planned out too.” He rolled his eyes jokingly, and you nodded eagerly, of course you did, how could you not, it is her first fall season after all.

“Here ya go.” You mumbled, sliding a plate in front of him, he furrowed his eyebrows, “I never answered about the eggs.” He didn’t argue though, as he picked up his fork and took a bite. “I know, but you’re doing a lot today, you need them.” You giggled, offering a small piece to Willow, now nearly eight months old. She happily mushed it with her couple of teeth, smiling brightly at Tyler, he nodded reassuring her that she was doing good.

Finally you were loading up into the car to go out for a while, Willow dressed in the cutest outfit she had, something you’d bought before she was even born. The belle sleeve onesie just barely still fit her chunky frame, and the red overall skirt over top just made her look even more adorable, and of course, a matching red bow in her hair. Tyler jokingly didn’t approve of how short her skirt was as he took her from you once you arrived, she sat perched on his lap as you pushed the wheelchair down the isles, thankful for the wood boards they had put down as paths in the dirt, Willow was making noises at everything she saw, reaching out to touch the pumpkins every once in a while. “Let me get a picture of you two.” You stopped his chair next to a huge pile of pumpkins, and he stood Willow up on his lap as she grinned at you, it was by far one of your favorite photos of them so far.

An older couple was walking by and smiled at you, “would you like me to take a photo for you?” She asked, and before you could even process her words, Tyler was answering with a yes please. You felt the blood rush to your face as you approached him, he handed Willow to you, and you were about to stand beside him but he gently pulled you to sit on his good leg, you didn’t have time to react, you only smiled for the camera just like he was. “Oh, how beautiful.” The older woman cheered, handing the phone back over to you. “Thanks.” You mumbled, Willow hiding her face in your neck, suddenly shy. You clicked on the picture, and you felt like your chest would explode, you looked like a family, but you weren’t. “Y/N?” Tyler called, you quickly shoved your phone in your pocket, “are you ready to go?” He asked, taking the baby back from you, confusion laced in his tone as he saw the look on your face. “Yeah, Uh, yeah let’s go.” You mumbled, pushing the chair towards the exit, he held in a sigh, trying to figure out what had caused your sudden mood change.

***

“It’s Christmas!” You heard Tyler cheer as he got Willow out of her crib, the nine month old clapping her hands out of his excitement. Tyler was on the upside now, his second surgery complete, and now rehabbing both, he was able to walk without his crutches, he had to go slow on the stairs, but the doctor encouraged him to keep working on them. In a few weeks he’s going to be skating for the first time in months, and you were terrified, meanwhile he was ecstatic, ready to feel like his normal self again. You smiled, keeping your eyes shut as your door opened, “it’s Christmas!” Tyler shouted, putting Willow on the bed and letting her crawl up to your head, mushing on your cheeks, you gasped lifting her up quickly, sending her into a fit of giggles in her reindeer pajamas. “Christmas? Your first one!” You spoke to her, Tyler smiled, sitting beside you. “Merry Christmas.” He whispered, handing you an envelope, he laughed as you put Willow down and quickly pushed yourself to be sitting against the headboard beside him. She made her little baby babble as she played with the bunched up blanket. “You didn’t have to get me anything.” You spoke softly, opening the envelope, revealing a gorgeous Christmas card. “Oh shush, just read it.” You could hear the nerves in his tone, you shot him a smile before letting your eyes run over the extensive writing he’d done.

“Y/N, you have been a godsend in mine and Willow’s life, there isn’t anyone else I would’ve trusted to leave her with during all of this, there isn’t anyone else I’d want to be helping me off the floor at three am. What I’m trying to get at is,

There isn’t anyone else. I don’t think there will be anyone else.

So, if you’d kindly accept my gift, dinner, without Willow, a date, that’s what I’d like to call it.

Love, Tyler.”

“What’s the matter, Seguin? Too afraid to ask me in person?” You quipped, he opened and closed his mouth searching for the right words to say, “is that a yes?” He finally asked, a hopeful look dancing in his eyes. “Of course it’s a yes. I’ve only been waiting months for you to ask.” You giggled, catching him off guard by pecking his lips, it isn’t like you two hadn’t shared kisses before, but it was normally in a drunken state. “Uh-huh.” He hummed pulling you back in for a proper kiss, Willow shrieked, startling you both. She was looking at you angrily, before snuggling up to her dad, as if saying you weren’t allowed near him. “Good job, princess, gotta protect daddy from mean ol’ Y/N.” He murmured to her, earning a glare from you, but as he broke into laughter, you couldn’t even keep up your charades. “Come on, it’s Christmas, she’s got presents to open.” You mumbled, kissing her chubby cheek, “presents!” He cheered, holding her up highly, she giggled as he lunged her back down.

The date had gone as good as you could’ve hoped,

not exactly how he’d planned, but still a great night, the sitter had cancelled, and the restaurant he wanted to take you too didn’t offer a pick up option, so you ended up eating pizza on the living room floor, watching Disney movies, per your request, and talking about everything and anything. And of course, there were lots of stolen kisses.

***

“It’s alright to be a little scared you know.” You reminded your now boyfriend, he was about to go on the ice for the first time in months, and the anxiety just hit him, what if’s repeating themselves in his head. Willow was fast asleep in the stroller, tired from her own activities this morning. “But–“ “No but, you’ve got this babe, you’ve been warming up to this for months, hell, you probably skate better than you walk.” You cut him off, giving him a short pep talk, you squealed in delight when he pulled you in for a quick kiss. You pulled away with a smile, “now, go show that ice whose boss.” You giggled, pecking him once more before patting his shoulder, you weren’t allowed to watch him rinkside, no distractions allowed, so you took Willow for a short walk, all the while she slept. You kept yourself busy, getting caught up with things on your phone as you waited for Tyler to call and say he was done.

Finally as you went back to get him, Willow was awake but grumpy, and hungry, so you kind of just rushed in with her on your hip. Also remembering you had some stuff to do for work today that was time sensitive, “how’d it go?” You asked as you bounced her in an attempt to get her to calm down. Tyler slung his bag over his shoulder, “it was great, rusty, but it felt good.” He explained shortly, sending your urgency, “I’ll put her in the car.” He offered, taking her from you, and instantly she calmed down, only making you feel worse. You knew it was common for her to go through phases, hell, she’d done this with Tyler where she wanted nothing to do with him for almost a whole month, you didn’t realize how bad it would hurt. He shot you an apologetic smile, “hey, just take a deep breath. You’re gonna get everything done on time.” He assured you.

***

New Years had come and gone, and Willow’s first birthday was quickly approaching, as were her first steps. Tyler was sad that they were going to be happening so soon, but at the same time he was beyond excited for her to be running around in no time.

She quickly grew out of the phase of only wanting Tyler, which both of you were grateful for, as he could see it eating away at you.

“Come on, come to dada.” You heard Tyler, you peeked your head around the wall, seeing him sitting on the floor arms reach away from Willow, she looked at him quizzically, reaching her arms out, she wobbled but didn’t fall. “Come on baby.” He encouraged her, she took one step, two, three, and he just kept sliding back until she couldn’t go any further. “Oh my god!” You and Tyler shouted at the same time, “shit,” he jumped now knowing you were behind him. “Hi.” You laughed, sitting beside him, “I think you officially have a walker on your hands.” You told him, pressing a kiss to his cheek. He furrowed his brows for a moment, he looked as if he was going to say something, but then decided against it. “Yeah I do.” He chuckled in agreement, setting her back on her feet and grinning as she did it again, and again, and again until she was too tired to do anymore and just plopped herself on your lap.

“Hi baby.” You mumbled, kissing her forehead, she sighed, nuzzling into your neck, instantly falling asleep. “She loves you.” Tyler mumbled, tucking your loose hair behind your hair, you bit your lip as you looked over at him. “I love you.” He breathed out, relief hitting him when you broke into a huge smile, “I love you, Ty.” You mumbled, he kissed you as good as he could with Willow curled up on your lap. “Let’s go put her to bed, yeah.” He laughed, taking her from you and disappearing to her room in record speed.

***

Tyler had his first morning skate today, finally getting back into a routine with the team, he was anxious as it was on a Saturday, thankfully no game today, but it was Willow’s birthday party. Of course, all planned by you, Tyler clueless on what to do for a one year old, all he knew is it had to be puppy themed, because those were her absolute favorite things.

“Woah.” Tyler stopped in his tracks, seeing the decorations you’d spread out around the house, his dogs happily laying with party hats on their heads. “Baby, this is awesome.” He chuckled as you came around the corner to greet him, “I know it is.” You laughed, welcoming the hug he offered you. “Thanks for doing all this for her.” He mumbled against your head, “of course.”

***

“Dada, dada, dada!” Willow shrieked running towards him, “Willow?” He gasped, his first game back resulting in a loss, but he scored and you couldn’t lie, it made you emotional. And he was all the clueless to you two being here, “surprise!” You grinned as he scooped her up, “you came?” He mumbled in shock, kissing his daughter before pulling you in with his other arm, “of course we came.” You whispered against his lips, smiling as he finally kissed you, “you did so amazing, babe, I’m so proud of you.” You cupped his jaw with one hand, “thank you.” Is all he could get out before Willow started to speak. She reached for you, “mama.” Your breathing hitched, and Tyler’s smile had grown. You looked to him, afraid to over step, “yes baby, that’s mama.” He assured her, “Tyler.” You cautioned, taking her as she kept reaching for you.

“Y/N, she’s just as much yours as she is mine, you’ve been here since she came home, you’ve taken care of her like a mother, and I don’t plan on letting you go anytime soon. So yes. You’re her mom.” His words brought tears to your eyes, he smiled softly wiping away the tears, kissing your forehead as Willow watched curiously, she kissed your cheek with a smile, having learned early on to be affectionate to people she liked. “Thank you baby,” you cooed to her, resting your head on top of hers. “Mama?” She hummed, smiling against you. “Yeah.” You agreed. “I love you.” Tyler sighed, snapping a picture of his girls, he said the words right before he snapped the picture, getting the most genuine smile from you. “I love you.”

taglist: @boqvistsbabe @tortito @2manytabsopen @heybarzy @barzysreputation @yzas-stuff @iwantahockeyhimbo @calgarycanuck

[itsbeenahellofayear]

what we got, it don't come easy

Summary: Some things are easy, some things aren't. It can take time to learn what is important.

Warnings: Smut. Maybe not as much as you'd expect from a story thats pretty much only about sex. Some feelings. Language.

Author's Note: It took a while to get this one across the line. The first segment has been written for weeks, but I lacked inspiration, motivation, and was a little burnt out on anything Leaf related for a little bit there. RIP 2021 season....

Thanks to all of you who kept checking in and were enthusiastic about the little snippet I posted. Kind of kicked my writing into gear today!

I crave your feedback - this is weird and disjointed and very personal in a lot of ways, so I'd love to hear what you think!

---

Sex with Auston is easy - that's never been the issue between you.

This thing started with sex - you connected on tinder, got to talking for a couple of days, then went out for drinks.... That wound up with him in your bed, having arguably the best sex of your life.

That first night, lying hot and sweaty and completely satiated, you'd be lying if the thought didn't cross your mind that you could do this for the rest of your life.

It was that good.

-

You don't keep a list of things to try, but you kind of keep a list of things to try.

-

Some things that make the sex with Auston so good:

He's the first guy to encourage you to use your vibrator on your clit while he's fucking you - it's not every single time - sometimes coordination isn't possible when he's fucking into you so good but those times when he's pressing deep into you, hands on your breasts, grip firm just the way you like, and you've just got your vibe pressed to your clit on a low setting and you just shake apart.... Those are good times.

His dick is huge. Like he's big to start, but then he grows. It honestly took a bit of work to find angles that didn't have him ramming your cervix each time, but once you did... He fills you up so good.

He loves to eat you out. You've had your fair share of mediocre oral, but there's something about the way he just goes for it, lets you twist your fingers in his too long hair, makes these little noises into you, that just really does it for you. He'll open you up with his thumbs and just dive his tongue deep inside of you, then move up and basically caress your clit with his tongue. If you're honest you can't even fathom what he's actually doing, it just feels insane.

He lets you ride his face. Now, it's not an every time thing, mostly because if you're going to expend energy on riding him, really what you want is his cock buried inside your aching slit. But sometimes, he'll settle himself on the bed, and you'll just climb on top of him, grip the headboard, and just ride.

-

You might love him.

(Maybe that's why it's good)

-

So the sex has never been the problem.

The problem lies in the in between bits.

In the moments when you're feeling insecure about his fame, and his looks, and the company he keeps. You're not a party girl - you'll go out to the bar once in a while, but people, everywhere, is not really your scene. You know he likes to go out, especially after wins. You know he likes to drink. And sure, sometimes he'll text you, and he'll end up at your place late at night. But sometimes he won't. And so you wonder.

It's also the moments where he just shuts down, internalizes, and won't communicate. You're not one for talking about your feelings, but you do believe in communicating when it's about things that affect someone else! Case in point: you send him a message in the morning on what you know is his off day - he doesn't even read it let alone respond until 8pm. You had asked him if he wanted to meet up for afternoon drinks.

It's also the moments when he says stupid immature shit, when you realize that, no matter how great a family he comes from, he's still a rich, entitled man-child that doesn't really understand the value of a dollar. And that irks you.

A lot.

-

But.

You're just fooling around - keeping it casual.

But.

-

He takes you out to the cottage with some of his boys. The season ended in heartbreak, they're splitting up for the summer, they want to blow off some steam.

You spend the days lazing by the lake, lying in hammocks in the yard, sneaking off for a "picnic" in the woods. And by picnic you mean Auston laid you out on a blanket and ate you out until you couldn't take it.

You spend the nights getting high sitting out by the fire, leaving unsubtly to go back inside to fuck.

It's probably around day 3 when you realize you're legitimately, 100% in love with this guy.

Day 5 you head back to the city, and haven't really talked to him about how you feel.

He leaves for Arizona the next morning.

-

He's not your boyfriend.

He doesn't know you fell for him.

-

The first night you had sex with him – the first night of the rest of your life – you remember thinking you've never felt this full.

Now, months later, you feel like you're empty.

Anytime you think of him, it's like your pussy just clenches involuntarily around what it thinks should be there, inside of you.

You want him so badly, so deeply, and you don't even have a real claim to him because you couldn't open up and tell him that something had changed.

You catch yourself scrolling insta late at night, looking to see if he's posted something that might hint he's out with someone else.

You hate that you're like this.

-

(You never see anything, for the record)

-

He comes back to Toronto in August.

That honestly catches you by surprise.

More so because you're just home on a Saturday afternoon, watching TV when he knocks on your door. Pretty much the last person you were expecting to see, but you can't deny that your heart ends up in your throat at the sight of him, tanned, bulked up, and looking at you like THAT.

"What..." you start.

"Faith" he breathes out.

You don't understand.

He walks forward into your apartment, crowding you back against the other wall of your tiny entryway.

You're still so caught up in him being here. The way he said your name...

You look up at him.

He just presses himself against you and crushes you to him in a hug. You feel him everywhere. The faint spicy scent of his cologne, the heat of his body, the puff of his breath against your neck where his head is pressing.

Engulfed - your brain provides.

"I missed you" he mutters into your neck.

-

Your brain is going a mile a minute.

How is he here? Why didn't he tell you he was coming back? He doesn't need to be back for weeks. Why is he here? What is happening?

You push him back a little. Not off of you entirely, just enough to give you some space to breathe.

"Auston, what?" You try again.

He looks down at you.

Swallows.

"I..." He starts.

Swallows again.

"I needed to see you, Faith."

He looks... Nervous?

"Aus... What's going on?" You ask him, heart racing out of your chest.

He swears.

"I might be reading this thing wrong, this thing we have, but... I want you to be mine."

You feel like you've been hit with a brick.

All you can do is stare at him as your mind struggles to keep up. You feel yourself reaching for him.

"Aus. Yes. Of course."

He blinks. "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

You reach for his hand and pull him to the bedroom.

-

Sex is easy, with you and Auston.

You've never been afraid to ask for what you want. He's never been shy to ask for what he wants. And usually that lines up.

But for the first time since all this started, you feel almost shy with him.

Without discussing it, you both get naked pretty damn quickly. There's a second or twenty where you're just looking at him, drinking in his broad shoulders, his stomach muscles, his trim hips and his thick thighs. God, do you want him.

You might say that last part out loud, from the way he laughs and just picks you up and tosses you on the bed.

You've been soaked since you opened your door, and you're impatient to feel him again. He looks at you and you just whimper his name and he smiles, hitches up your legs, and slides slowly, so slowly, inside you

“Fuck, Aus" you hear yourself.

"You feel so good, baby" he groans out, letting you get used to him stretching you out, leaning down to press a filthy open-mouthed kiss to your lips. He bites at your lips as he starts to move, driving into you in a rhythm that makes you feel so good, hitting you just right.

It’s not enough.

But before you can say anything, Auston pulls back, and changes the angle that your hips are lined up with his and suddenly he’s impossibly deeper, and you just can’t breathe with how good he feels and his hands are on your breasts, and he’s pinching your nipples just right, and you are moaning his name almost like a prayer, and it just slips out.

“Aus, I love you.”

You don’t even realize what you said until he stills for a moment, eyes snapping to yours, and he makes this noise.

“Do you mean it,” he asks.

Its not the time for it, but you’re never going to be his open another time so… “Yeah.”

“God, baby. Yes. I love you too. It’s why I came back. I just wasn’t sure…”

He moves back so he can kiss you, deep and filthy. You feel him, deep inside you, and you just… cling to him. He starts fucking into you in earnest - hard and fast, kissing you the whole time, though it ends up being more like just panting into each others mouths but you can’t get enough of him.

“I’m so close,” you manage to get out.

Auston gets a hand between you and presses his thumb to your clit and you just hear yourself keening.

“I love how you feel around me,” he groans out. “Come for me.”

It doesn’t take long.

You shake apart underneath him, and you feel him pulse inside you and it’s just so much and you can feel tears leaking out from the corner of your eyes, and you just feel so much in that moment.

It’s so much.

-

So sex has never been an issue.

But now it is so much more.

[luimagines]

He reacts to seeing you Sick/Wounded Part 3

Final part of the prompt below!

Masterlist

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Scenario under the cut!

Four

Four starts looking through Wind’s borrowed telescope at the monster below them and tries to search for weak points and guard trails. There’s a good number of them, at least two per person here but they’re closer to the town than anyone anywhere is comfortable with so they have to go.

“AHHHCHOOO!!”

Multiple monsters look in your direction.

“Will you keep it down?” Legend snapped. “Sneeze a little louder next time, I don’t the monsters in the back heard you.”

“I’m not trying to be loud.” You sniffle and furiously wipe your face. “There’s got be something in the air here. I’m not allergic period. This just isn’t like me.”

Four nods in agreement and takes his eyes away from the telescope. He hands it back to Wind, who eagerly takes his spot and makes his way toward you.

In all honesty, you look miserable. And have since that morning.

You’re constantly sneezing, your nose and eyes are red and blotchy and it goes out to cheeks. You’ve been blowing your nose on random leaves since you’ve run out of tissues earlier that day and it continuously seems to be plugged despite it all. You also seem to be shivering ever so slightly but you never made any mention of being cold.

Four frowns to himself and pokes your neck, only to startled into placing his whole hand there. You’re covered in a cold sweat but warm despite the temperature outside.

“What the heck Four?” You knock his hand away and take a step back.

“I think you’re sick.” He blurts with as much grace a bull in a china shop.

“I’m no-” You cut yourself off with a cough this time. It’s so strong that you bend over and fall to your butt on the ground with barely any time in between to catch your breath.

“Benched.” Time turns on his heel and points you back the way you came. “Go back to the town. You’re not fit to fight.”

You whimper after the cough attack and nod, getting to your feet. Four doesn’t like the idea of you going back alone but he knows his friends need the numbers to take the monsters down fast enough, so he doesn’t offer for a moment. He tries to come to a decision before they make any more moves without him but Time speaks again.

“Four. Go with them. Make sure they actually make it to the town.” Time commands and turns to the rest of the group. “We’re going to need fire power.”

Four catches Warrior and Wild grin manically. “Leave it to us!”

“You had to say something.” Four snickers at Twilight misfortune and jogs slightly to catch up with you.

You’re still trying to wipe at your face with your sleeve and it leaves a trail of snot and tears on the fabric.

It’s a bit disgusting....Ok, it’s super gross and it makes Four want to gag somewhat but he’ll let you have it.

Being sick is gross. He’s just got to make sure your clothes are washed when it passes.

“Four?” You call.

He perks up and speeds up to fall in line with your steps. “I’m here.”

You look at him for a moment and sniffle again. “ ’m sorry you got sent back with me. You looked excited to take some monsters down.” 

“I’m...” Four looked to the side and tried to find the right words to talk to you. “I mean, I’ll live with it. I’m not that disappointed to be honest. I was thinking of joining you anyway. It didn’t feel right for you head out on your own.”

“But you want to support the others.” You argue. “I could see it. You had to think about it.”

“Ok well-”

“There’s a lot of them out there, isn’t there?” You press and frown to yourself. “A lot of monsters that are going to take all their hands and then some to be taken down and I get sent back and you have to come with me-”

“Ok, hold up.” Four grabs your bicep and shakes it a little. “Slow that down. It’s not like you asked to get sick. I know just as much you do that we’d both rather be up there with them. That’s a given. But you need to take care of yourself as well and I don’t mind being with you anyway.”

You push your mouth to the side and don’t look at him. “I better not get you sick.”

Four snorts ever so slightly and moves his hand from you arm to your hand, lacing your fingers together and swinging them ever so slightly. He knows you don’t want him to see the smile on your face when he does so but it’s your reaction every time.

“While I doubt it’ll happen, you’ll take care of me if I do get sick, right?”

“Always.” 

Warrior

They were in a new area this time. Warrior can’t recognize the landscape or the town’s names as they pass so he’s content to let someone else take the lead for a change.

The town’s people had mentioned a sealed temple of sorts that hadn’t been used in ages. Bad things had been happening in the area so they were advised to steer clear.

Naturally they had to go check it out.

Don’t leave no stone unturned and all that jazz.

If anything, it sounds more like a dungeon at this point so he’s a bit excited to get some practice in. 

Warrior walks near the front of the group and lets outa whistle when the reach their goal.

It a large dark blue building with three spiraling towers in a triangle-fecta with multiple columns around the front of it, acting as a sort of imposing gate. The columns themselves are full of grotesque monstrous faces, which are realistic enough to cause some discomfort amongst the ranks. 

“Oh, we’re going to be here for hours.” Legend groans and tilts his head to the sky. “Maybe even days! Why are here again?”

“To eradicate evil before it grows beyond it’s borders.” Time take a breath and walks forward. “The people are afraid and it’s our job to put an end to it.”

Warrior can agree with that, it’s what the hero does after all. Fine print and all that.

But you make a small whimper from behind him and turns around to see you. You don’t pleased one bit with your arms crossed and your head down. “I don’t like this place.”

Right. Not a Link. This technically isn’t in your job description, unlike them.

“You could wait out here?” Wild offers. Warrior remembers that they’re alike in a  away with the lack of experience with dungeons and wonders if maybe either one of them can stay back as well. Surely, they don’t all have to go in, do they?

Sky grins good naturally and punches you gently on your shoulder. “You good?”

“This whole place feels wrong.” You reply. “Do we have to go through there?”

“It’s because it feels wrong that we have to go in.” Hyrule shrugs. “We have to make it better.”

“If we find loot inside, it’s just a bonus.” Wind bounces up to you with grin.

“What’s the problem? Are you scared?” Legend taunts. “Do you need someone to hold your hand?”

“Are you offering?” You snap back.

“He may not be, but I am.” Warrior holds his hand out and smiles at you with as much charm as he can conjure up. He has no idea what possesses him to comment and he hopes that you don’t take offence to it. He wasn’t trying to mock you.

To his surprise, you look at his hand for a little moment longer than he think it’s worth and gently reach out to lace your fingers together.

Your hand is warm and you don’t look at him when he feels you give it a small squeeze. “Ok, let’s go.”

This is not a big deal. He’s not going to make it a big deal.

He just wanted to be a good friend is all. Yeah, that’s all it was.

As the group you all head into the cursed building and are immediately faced with choices.

Five hallways. No end in sight in any of them and no other options.

“Guess we split the party.” Twilight shrugged. “I’ll go with Wind.”

This was first pair off and others started to claim a partner for the journey ahead.

“I guess I already have my partner.” Warrior smiles and begins to walk away. “Should we take the far left?”

“Don’t you know, you never split the party.” You sing under your breath and tug on Warrior’s hand to the beat. “Clerics in the back, keep those fighter hale and hearty. The wizard in the middle where he can shed some light and you never let the damn thief out of sight.”

You’re not paying attention to him.

He chalks it up to your previous nervous energy and takes the lead instead.

The hallway you both travel through is dark and beginning to shrink. the two of you are now shoulder to shoulder and with more time, have to walk in a single file line.

You don’t let go of his hand.

Occasionally there is the lone torch to keep the path ahead illuminated but Warrior thinks that they’re more for decoration and peace of mind than any actual use. You know, considering the vast space of nothing in front of you.

The hallway comes to an abrupt stop and Warrior can feel you crash into his back. Before him a large room with torches on every other wall, eight walls in total, counting the one with the entryway. There’s nothing inside but a single glowing blue ball of light.

It reminds him faintly of Proxy and he steps inside the room to get a better look.

“Will o’ the wisp.” You mutter from behind and stop from entering the room any farther, stopping Warrior as well in the process.

“What?” He turns to you and can see how tense you are.

“Back home,” You begin. “They are known to be by swamps, bogs and the like. They’re supposed to mislead travelers and are used as a symbol of a goal that’s impossible to reach and are typically sinister in nature. What ever you do, don’t follow it.”

Warrior takes the warning to heart, takes a step and returns to your side.

Nothing like Proxy at all.

“What do we do then?” He asks, not taking his eyes off of it.

“I don’t know...” You gulp. “I didn’t even think they’d be here. They’re not known to be fighters... just mess with your head and lead you to your doom.”

On cue, the light shifts and begins to circle the room. Warrior makes a grab for his sword and you copy his movements. The two of you stand back to back and watch it closely.

It flies straight into a wall after a dizzying moment and a door appears where there wasn’t one before.

“That’s it?” Warrior stands down but his grip is tight, on both your hand and his weapon. “Guess that’s the way out.”

“No. What did I just say? Don’t follow it.”

“But it’s gone.”

“It went that way. Don’t go in the same direction.” You stress.

Warrior lets go of your hand and turns to stare at you head on, taking a step back and entering the rest of the room. He goes to open his mouth to reply- but his foot goes lower than he anticipates.

He’s activated something.

You jump as the entryway where you once were, shuts and the torches go out instantly, plunging the whole room into darkness.

“Link?” You call out and Warrior has no idea where you are all of a sudden.

He regrets letting go of your hand.

“Still here.” He chuckles nervous and finishes the sentence with an audible gulp.

The Will o’ wisp returns from a different direction and he hears you scream.

Warrior is quick to reach for Legend’s fire rod and he fires it into the air.

The ball of light leaves but the he’s taken gives just enough light to see what’s happened. You’ve ended up on the floor and somehow took a hit to your head that’s pouring blood all over your face, with a massive skeleton over you, poised to take another hit.

The fire from the rod dies out and the room goes black again.

But at least Warrior knows where you are.

And now he’s pissed.

He fires the rod again right at the monster and feels a vindictive sort of satisfaction when the creature catches aflame. He’s quick to launch the monster away from you and help you up. He passes you the rod, taking a full hold on his sword and stands in front of you.

“Light up the room and monsters, yeah? I’ll finish them off.” He says and drops into a defensive stance.

“Bad things happen with Wips.” You mutter and prepare to fire rod again and instead spin across the floor. Some of the torches relight but it’s clear they won’t last long.

More monsters start to appear from the doors the wisp activates now that the initial key has been set off.

“I’ll listen to you next time!” Warrior finishes the first beast and begin on the next.

“I think I’ll leave the dungeon stuff to the Links. Leave you, your puzzles and your monsters to each other.” You start talking to yourself. “This is no way to make a living.”

“Tell me about it. I didn’t even have these in my Hyrule.”

Hyrule

Hyrule has no clue what he’s was doing.

He could admit that.

He was used to having magic at his disposal and fixing the problem with it. But this? This was a little beyond his pay grade.

He wasn’t even being paid.

“ ‘Rule!” You cry from the bed. You hand is outstretched in an attempt to reach him but he’s too far away from your grasp.

He walks over to your side and grabs your hand. “I’m here. What do you need?”

“Can I have a glass of water?” You grip his hand and he’s hit with a wave of concern when he sees it’s not really that strong.

“Yeah, sure.” He says, getting up. “Give me a minute.”

You smile at him and close your eyes again. He hates how miserable you look. Flushed cheeks and forehead, raging fever, cold sweat running off you in a vain attempt to cool yourself down, you’re shaking and he catches you mumble every now and then but he can’t catch what you say.

Hyrule’s silver lining is that you’ve been mostly asleep through the day, making his job a little easier as nurse and doctor. The most he can complain about is that it’s a little boring.

He still doesn’t know what’s he’s doing.

He had thought that it was something he could handle but but was only within the first hour that he realized he was powerless to help you with anything.

He feels a little useless.

The others had gone out to survey the town they’re cooped up in and get details and equipment.

Hyrule knows himself well enough and has learned enough from the others that he’s pretty much... well, useless in a market. Money isn’t really a concept where he’s from or at least not with the bells and whistles and unwritten rules that everyone else seems to know at the drop of a hat.

On top of that, with Hyrule’s bleeding heart, he had offered to be the one to stay behind and look after you while they were gone most of the day. He figured that if he was the groups healer then he could help you with this too.

Wrong.

Again, he’s thankful you’ve mostly been sleeping.

When he’s retrieved your request and made it back to the room, he stops dead in his tracks at the door.

There’s... something over you. A shadow like blob with no discernable shape, figure or features. The revelation shocks Hyrule into stillness at the idea of you being in danger.

It’s not outwardly hurting you. Just watching.

Or so he thinks anyway.

You still look peacefully unaware of the conscious world and look to be in a deep sleep once more. Meaning, you have idea that this.. thing is here.

Hyrule doesn’t move but he looks around is immediate vicinity. His sword is barely within arms reach and he knows that the step he’s about to take is directly on a squeaky board. It would alert his presence and he doesn’t have anyway of currently fighting that thing.

He crouches down and places your cup by the door frame. He then places is hand just beyond the squeaky board and crawls those few inches to reach his sword.

As soon as it’s within his grasp, he calls on his magic and throws his astral sword in the thing’s direction.

It makes contact, but does no damage.

The shadow mass merely “stands” straighter and stills all movement.

This thing may not have a face but Hyrule is sure that it’s checking him out, assessing him, gauging what kind of threat he might be if he were to attack again.

Hyrule readies himself into a defensive stance and glares right back.

There are no words spoken.

Just as he’s about to charge, it dips down and disappears through the floor boards. The air in room ceases to be charged with unfathomable energy and he knows that it’s gone.

Hyrule is confused and on edge. He’s never seen something like before and he doubts that it’ll help your condition if he asks you or if you would know anything about it.

He straps his sword on his back, just in case, and picks up your cup.

“Link?” You call again, trying to push yourself up into a sitting position. You’re still very weak and very tired and you give up half way.

“I have your water.” He says instead, trying his best to smile for you. He holds it out to you and hopes that you don’t notice that his hands are shaking.

You grin in response and take it, seemingly none the wiser.

You sigh in relief as you sip. “You’re a good friend. Thanks for staying with me. I’m sure it’s been pretty boring when all the others are been productive.”

“I don’t mind one bit. I’ll be here for as long as you need me.” He sits on the bed.

Hyrule continuously has no idea what he’s doing.

But he certainly isn’t going to be bored from here on out. 

He has to protect you now, from whatever that was, so he will. 

[a-sirens-melody]

as the world caves in

“Hey. Look me in the eye. You know I love you, right?”

A phrase Luca’s heard a million times throughout his life. His mom is stern sometimes, but she always makes sure he knows he’s loved.

Except this time it doesn’t work. He doesn’t feel loved. Not when he’s being forced to the bottom of the ocean with his- his weird see through uncle that he’s never met before and honestly, he creeps Luca out! He creeps him out with his transparent body and visible organs and a heart that stops up because of too much oxygen.

He doesn’t meet his mom’s eyes. Instead, he swims to his bedroom, almost through the entryway when he stops. Turns around.

He’s never run away before. Is he really about to do this?

He thinks about Alberto and all the new things he’s learned about the surface. The sun on his skin, the grass on his feet, the wind in his hair. The hours spent building Vespas and riding them down the hill into the water.

Having a friend. Someone his own age to talk to and who never shut down his questions about the surface or humans.

Luca darts out of the house, his mind made.

Just barely, he swears he hears Nonna laugh.

Probably a stray fish, or I’m hearing things, he thinks, and continues to swim into the night.

***

Two seasons.

Mom wants to send him to the Deep for two whole seasons.

How could she think it’s safer down there than on the surface? She’s never been to either of those places, as far as Luca knows. Why would she send him somewhere so dark, and cold, and….

Could he actually survive down there?

He doesn’t know a lot about his uncle, but Luca knows he needs more oxygen. And there’s less oxygen at the bottom of the sea. How would he breathe? Would his body adapt to his surroundings? What would he look like?

Just like Uncle Ugo? Black yet clear skin, the only color inside his body on display. Thinner teeth, less teeth from eating only whale carcass for every meal. No seaweed or other fish. No variety.

It sounds miserable.

It sounds terrifying.

Luca speeds up, tail swishing through the water. The longer he takes to get to Alberto, the longer he’s stuck in his head. It hurts thinking about his parents right now, and he really wants a hug.

There it is. The pebbles and further up, the beach.

Alberto.

He steps onto the beach, paying no attention to his fading scales. Where’s Alberto? He needs to explain, needs somewhere to stay-

Oh. Luca forgot it’s still nighttime. Alberto might be asleep.

…it feels like a thousand years have passed since they fell asleep together looking at the anchovies and talking about Vespas. Before he was caught and almost sent away.

On top of the tower, an orange light glows. The fire is still burning from a few hours ago. Or maybe Alberto restocked it?

Whatever the reason, Luca is drawn to it all the same. It’s a place to stay for the night, to hide from his parents. If Alberto really is asleep, he’ll just explain himself in the morning. And if he’s awake, well…

He’ll explain himself in the morning.

He walks toward the tower, arms wrapped around himself. It’s a cool night on the surface, a breeze blowing past. He’s not wearing his human clothes and he misses his shirt as he climbs up the ladder shivering.

“Luca?”

Luca stiffens in surprise.

Oh. So he is awake.

Halfway up the ladder, Alberto pokes his head out. It’s hard to see his face, even with the big fish shining in the sky, and his curly hair is only visible as a dark silhouette. Still, Luca hears the concern in his voice.

“What are you doing here again?”

Luca opens his mouth to reply, and…

Well, what is he supposed to say? That he got caught, and his parents want to send him away because of it? It’s not just his mom, it’s both of them too. Even though his dad looked like he’d rather be anywhere else, he didn’t say anything to stop her. He didn’t say anything. Just went along with Mom, like he always does.

“I wanna stay here tonight. If that’s okay with you, of course,” he says. Alberto’s smart, he’ll pick up on what Luca really doesn’t want to say.

Silence for a few moments, and then Alberto holds out his hand. “Yeah, no problem. Come on up.”

So he climbs the rest of the makeshift ladder, and takes the other boy’s hand. He’s pulled up onto the wooden floor and takes a second to regain his balance.

“I don’t really, uh. Have another hammock. Or another room unless you count the roof.” Alberto points up, as if Luca had no idea where the roof was. He brings it to the back of his neck while his foot scuffs the floor. “If you don’t- if you don’t wanna share with me,” this part is mumbled but Luca can understand enough,” I can probably find something to make the floor more comfortable-”

“No!” His mouth is faster than his brain, and Luca struggles to explain his outburst. “I mean no, that’s- that’s fine. I’m used to sleeping alone with someone else but. But I’d rather not be alone tonight.”

He didn’t even think about sharing Alberto’s hammock, but now that he’s brought it up? That sounds perfect.

He wouldn’t be able to sleep by himself. He’s shared a room with his grandma for as long as he can remember.

But he’s always had his own bed even then. Tonight, he just wants to be held.

He thinks back on what he just said and-

That doesn’t make any sense, Luca scolds himself.

But somehow, Alberto seems to understand and perks up. “Okay!” And seems to calm down just as quickly. “I mean, yeah, that’s fine. I’m pretty sure we’ll both fit. Besides, I bet you’re cold, huh?” Luca nods, wrapping his arms around himself once again. “Here, I’ll go find your shirt and then we can go to sleep. Unless you wanna stay up and talk?”

Luca shakes his head. “Tomorrow. I’m really tired.”

Alberto stares at him for a few seconds, head tilted. “Okay, that’s fine. Tomorrow then.” He doesn’t sound mad, just concerned. They’ve only been friends for a few days and yet Luca’s never been so distraught before. He turns to the suitcase he keeps all his clothes in and digs out the white shirt he gave to Luca.

“Here you go!” He tosses it over and Luca barely catches it, fumbling with his hands. He slips it on and walks toward the white hammock.

Alberto comes back over and holds it down. “You go first.” Luca climbs in, hammock dipping with his weight, and then Alberto. It rocks with the weight of two people, Alberto crashing into Luca. He wraps his arms around him, clearly not expecting the swing. “Sorry!”

He laughs. “You’re fine!” He leans into Alberto before he can pull away. “This is nice, actually.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. You’re warm.” Stay just like that, please, Luca wants to say, but doesn’t.

“Okay,” Alberto says, shaky. He takes a breath and slowly moves them onto the bottom of the hammock. They’re laying down now, still wrapped up in each other. It’s nice. Hearing Alberto breathe in his ear and hugging Luca and Luca’s head in the crook of Alberto’s neck.

He doesn’t want this moment to end.

But they have to sleep eventually, and so Alberto mutters, “g’night, Luca.”

“Goodnight, Alberto.” Luca smiles and closes his eyes, feeling a little more ready for whatever tomorrow will bring.

[lihikainanea]

tiger getting small while on vacation and she suddenly becomes paranoid that everyone can hear her (throwback to an old blurb of yours when she wasn’t getting that small yet) so she is panicking everytime they’re intimate, which bill is not going to let slide. he just wants her to let it out, but the poor bean is so anxious, she shuts down. it gets to the point where she can’t even enjoy herself in other aspects, like a dark cloud, so bill secretly switches them to a cute little cottage in the middle of nowhere and fucks her real good. she tries to hold back, but he coaxes her, and when she lets it out? bill thinks he’ll just pass out. her moans this time are those soft high pitched one because she’s just so small. she probably starts crying. i’m such a needy bitch lately idk what’s wrong with me.

Bish I am so here for this.

I think tiger is pretty vocal most of the time, just because her Big Dude hits it so good that she can't even hold it back, and most times she's so small for him and so spaced out that she doesn't even register how loud she's being, the moans she can't stop, the guttural sounds as she's blissed out. And like, for his part Bill loves it. It's his favourite sound in the world, when she whines for him, when he knows he's making her feel good. Bill wants all of it, wants her to yell and scream if she has to, cry, hell she can make goat sounds for all he cares--it's all good.

And while I am absolutely here for the times tiger has had to be real quiet when they're at his family's house, just to switch things up a little, what if this is like....a friend's vacation again? And there are so many elements to this.

Their friends don't know about them, so maybe tiger and Bill are still booking separate rooms like idiots. And maybe Bill always kind of speaks to the resort ahead of time, asks for two rooms to be conveniently located waaaaaayyyyy the hell on the other side of the complex so they don't have to worry so much and can sneak around a bit easier. It usually works like a charm--except this time. This time, somehow, all of the friends end up getting rooms that are side by side down a long hallway.

So there's this added factor that Bill can't be seen coming and going from her room, especially in partial states of undress, because that's weird. They can't have sex snuggle on the balcony, which is like their favourite thing to do in the wee hours of the night and into the break of dawn.

So not only is tiger worried about making noise--oh no no friend, we're taking it a step further here--she's worried about getting caught so she is like, flat out dead bolting her door so Bill can't even come in. And he's getting pissed because she keeps wearing those sundresses and she's covered in tanlines and he's going crazy, she's getting pent up because god he's just so bronzed and so golden and his eyes are so clear and green.

He finally manages to talk some sense into her, no doubt vaguely threatening, and he promises her that he'll be careful. He promises her that no one will see him sneak into her room. Maybe he even does it real casual like, steps out into the outdoor hallway at 1AM, leans on the post, has a smoke--and then just conveniently walks into tiger's room two doors down, instead of his own.

And god, it feels good. It's been too long and this whole forbidden element really gets her going but now she has another problem--she's worried someone is going to hear. Their friends are on either side and the walls at this resort are paper thin, and tiger is focusing so hard on staying quiet that nothing else is working for her. She's frustrated, her eyes are clenched so tight she has tears coming from them, and the only thing she can focus on is just...not making a sound. She's can't focus on how good he smells. She can't focus on how soft his lips are, how warm his tongue is, how blond his hair looks in the glow of the moonlight. She can't focus on it, because if she does she'll lose control and she's terrified someone will hear her.

"You can let go sweet girl," he tries to reassure her, tries to get her to release all those moans he loves to hear so much, "It's okay if they hear you. They know you're here. I'll be quiet."

But tiger just shakes her head. And god the poor girl needs a release so bad, but she just can't get there because she's so worried. And Bill has a rule that like, if tiger doesn't get there--then he doesn't, either. Because that's not fair. So he begrudgingly puts an end to their night, still hard as a rock, and just takes her in his arms for cuddles instead. And tiger feels even more terrible because she knows he needs a release, she wants to give him that, but he won't let her.

And I think the final straw for Bill is when he wakes up at 4AM to tiger's feet pushing on his butt, telling him to get out of bed and that he needs to leave and go back to his own room. Bill is pissed, and he gives her the stank eye the whole day.

He is absolutely unwilling to go this entire vacation without some good lovin', and without being able to wake up with tiger snug in his arms, sucking softly on his thumb. It's just not going to happen. Bill doesn't care if he has to pack up his shit and fly to another fucking resort--it's happening.

He bristles at her the whole day, like a petulant child. He tones is down a lot when he can see that she's actually getting small on him, when he can tell that she's spiralling a bit and really thinking that she did something wrong. He puts his hand on her back as they head to the bar for another round of drinks, rubbing softly.

"You're good for me sweet girl," he coos in her ear, "You're so good for me."

"You're mad," she mumbles, "...at me."

"I'm not mad at you kid," he reassures, "I just need you so bad."

She bites her lip, hiding a shaky sigh and he crowds her space a bit more.

"Are you going to let me fix it?" he asks, "Let me take care of it, so I can have you?"

She looks at him with those big eyes, and his heart fucking stops.

"I need to have you," he murmurs to her, "Will you let me fix it?"

She nods, subtly, and he smiles gently at her.

"Good girl," he says, "My good girl."

And he disappears for a little while that afternoon, reappearing only around dinner time. He finds tiger at the beach bar, playing cards with a few from the group.

"There you are," he says, "I've been looking for you, kid."

He plops a kiss on her head, and nobody flinches--that's pretty normal for them.

"What's up, bud?" she asks.

"We have that excursion in 30 minutes. You didn't forget, did you?"

Tiger catches on real quick.

"Oh shit, I totally did," she says as she stands, " Sorry bud. Let me go uh...grab my stuff."

Bill extends his hand to her, helps her climb over a few legs and over the table.

"See you guys in a bit," he waves a hasty goodbye to the group, and starts walking with her back to the lobby.

"Lobby in 15 minutes. An overnight bag, sunscreen, that bikini I love," he tells her lowly as she takes a mental note of what she needs, "Oh, and tiger?"

She looks up at him, a little thrill running down her spine.

"No panties."

She has to stop the little giggle from escaping, has to physically refrain from skipping to her room to grab her things. And for his part, Bill barely just catches his own hand as it was on its way to a firm smack on her ass.

She meets him as instructed, and he's leaning against a powder blue car from the 1950s that is so typical in these small tropical towns.

"M'lady," he opens the car door for her, helping her into it before going to the other side. He looks comically large in the car, more so than usual, and tiger chuckles.

"Can you even drive here?" she asks. He gives her a mischievous smirk.

"Let's find out."

it takes about 20 minutes. Tiger holds his phone up and dictates the directions--but eventually the little car starts chugging up a hill, and tiger is trying to ignore how turned on she's getting watching Bill expertly switch gears, manipulate the stick shift, get the car up that goddamn hill like a boss--and the she sees it. This beautiful villa, sprawling, she can already see the infinity pool and humongous outdoor deck and the floor to ceiling windows, but most of all--she can't see anything, or anybody else. The villa stands alone, at the top of a mountain.

"Bill--" she starts, but it's cut off abruptly when his big hand covers her mouth. He doesn't say anything, just leans over and kisses her deeply. So deeply that they get a bit lost in it because goddamn it feels good to be able to do that again, but he snaps to his senses when tiger starts trying to crawl over the console and straddle his lap.

"Inside," he says breathlessly, "Let's go inside."

It's a hasty entrance. The bags are thrown by the entryway. The champagne that Bill had chilling on ice since the afternoon is ignored. Food will be delivered later, and he purposely chose a time where he knew they'd be able to get a few rounds in before they were disturbed. He shakes out his shoulders, trying to reel in his desire for just a second, and right as he's about to tell tiger to get on her knees he turns and sees that she's already kneeling for him.

"Good girl," he praises, walking over to her. He looms over her, snapping his fingers so she meets his eyes, and he takes her chin in his hand.

"Tiger, I have rules tonight."

"Yes," she murmurs, "Okay."

She mouths at his thumb, tries to close her lips around it, and he gives it to her. Her shoulders relax as she all but deflates.

"No panties for the next 24 hours. If I see them on you, I'm ripping them off," he says, "Understand?"

"Yes," she sighs breathily.

"You get everything you want tonight sweet girl, but if it's too much, then you tell me," he says, "Understand?"

"Yes."

"What are your words?"

"Yellow," she murmurs around his thumb, "Or pineapple."

He nods curtly.

"Last rule, and the most important one," he pulls his thumb from her mouth so that he has her full attention, shushing her harshly when she whines.

"If you're quiet for longer than 3 seconds, if the walls don't fucking shake with your moans for me, I'll fucking stop," he snarls, "Do you understand me?"

[imagineteamfreewill]

A Good Kind of Not Okay

Title: A Good Kind of Not Okay

Pairing: Nanny!Reader x Director!Sam

Word Count: 4,414

Warnings: A little bit of pining

Square Filled: Director!Sam

Summary: Sam is a single dad who also happens to be one of the world’s most famous movie directors. When he struggles to care for his daughter like he wants, he hires the reader to help care for his pride and joy.

A/N: This is a submission for the 2020-2021 SPN AU Bingo (@spnaubingo​). Please let me know what you think. Enjoy!

X

_______________

Sam was running late. Again. Filming was behind schedule for the third time that week, and as the director, he had to stay until everything was finished. Of course, he was part of the reason why the filming was behind schedule. He couldn’t help it. Sam was a perfectionist, and he always had been. That’s what got him hired.

“I’m so sorry I’m late,” Sam said. He glanced down the street and then turned. “I’m on my way, I should be there in ten minutes.”

“Mr. Winchester, we’ve talked about this.”

“I know, I’m sorry. I’ll be there soon.” He ended the call before the center director could chew him out any further. He felt bad enough as it was, he didn’t need more reminders and warnings about being late. He really did try to keep a normal schedule, and he always made arrangements if the filming was scheduled to go late into the night or early in the morning, but there were some things that were out of his control.

The roads were blessedly empty and Sam pulled into the parking lot in just over five minutes. He wasn’t normally one to speed, especially if Elsie was in the car with him, but it was times like these when he was thankful for the extra horsepower. The Charger was the last big thing he’d bought for himself before his daughter was born and he rarely took advantage of its capabilities. Dean constantly nagged him about it.

Climbing out of the car, he grabbed his phone from the cupholder and rushed inside where he knew Elsie was waiting. The day care was completely deserted except for her and the director, who was sitting in one of the waiting room chairs, alternating between watching the front doors and the small child perched at the plastic drawing table beside her. Even the lights in the back playrooms and the office were off.

“Mr. Winchester, I’m glad you made it here okay.”

“Daddy!” Elsie bolted from her chair, abandoning her backpack and leaving the crayons to roll off the table and onto the floor. Sam crouched to scoop her up as soon as she was in arm’s reach, and his daughter immediately wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her face against his shoulder. 

“Hey, sweetheart. I’m sorry I’m late,” he murmured, and he cradled the back of her tiny head in his hand. He still couldn’t get over how tiny she was, even at four years old.

The director stood from her seat, clipboard and radio in hand. She gave him a scolding look. “Mr. Winchester—”

“Please, call me Sam,” he interrupted. “And I know, you can’t keep waiting with her. It won’t happen again.”

Her expression turned withering. “That’s becoming a catchphrase for you. I’m sorry, Mr. Winchester, but Elsie can’t keep coming to Gilded Hearts after the end of this week. We have very strict policies about parent pick-up and you signed a contract agreeing to uphold them. You’ve broken that contract multiple times this week alone, and I can’t count the number of times you’ve broken it otherwise.”

Sam frowned, shifting Elsie in his arms so he could pick up her backpack with one hand. “You’re kicking her out? Please, don’t kick her out just because I messed up a few—”

“It’s been more than a few times,” the director pointed out. “If it had been an emergency, it would be a different story, but we can’t keep staying late with her because you can’t seem to be able to pick her at the time you agreed upon when Elsie first started coming here.”

Lifting her head, Elsie looked up at Sam with big, hazel eyes. She’d perfected his own puppy dog expression solely to use on Sam and her Uncle Dean, and Sam’s heart sunk. The guilt settled in and suddenly all he could think about was how selfish he’d been. He’d been putting work in front of his daughter, something he promised he’d never do, and now he had to face the consequences.

“Okay. You said the end of this week?” Sam asked, sighing. The director nodded and gave him a polite, albeit tight, smile. “Alright. Thanks for staying with her. Have a good night.”

The director waved goodbye to Elsie, then watched in silence as Sam carried her out to the car. It was still sunny out and Elsie squinted, whining a little when he stepped out of the shade provided by the enormous oak trees that guarded the day care’s entrance.

“I know. Your sunglasses are in the car, honey.” Sam dug his keys back out of his pocket and unlocked the backseat, then carefully situated Elsie in her carseat. The tiny pair of Minnie Mouse sunglasses were right where they always were, and once his daughter was buckled in, he handed them to her so she could slip them on. She did so immediately.

“Are you sad, Daddy?” she asked. Elsie reached out a hand, grabbing onto Sam’s coat before he could back out of the doorway and go around to the driver’s side.

“I’m not sad, babygirl. Daddy’s just tired from work. Are you hungry? You ready to go home and eat?”

After a moment, Elsie nodded and let go of his coat. Sam shut the door and let out a long sigh as he went around the back of the car. His head was pounding and he was exhausted from shooting in the heat all day, but getting food in his little girl’s stomach and making sure that she got everything else she needed before bedtime had to be his priority right now. Then he would have to figure out where she was going to spend her days after the week was over. She couldn’t exactly come to work with him on an R-rated movie set. The impending migraine would have to wait.

_______________

“What’s your name?” the little girl asked, and you raised your eyebrows at her for a brief moment, then crouched down to her level.

“I’m Y/N. What’s yours?”

She held onto the door handle with both hands, swinging her weight on it as she stared at you. “I’m not supposed to tell strangers my name.”

“That’s very smart,” you replied, smiling. “Is your daddy home?”

“Who’s asking?”

A laugh almost slipped out at the cliché response, but you carefully held it back. You started to answer when a very tall, very handsome man in a suit stepped up behind the little girl in the tutu.

Nodding, you stood and held out your hand for him to shake. “I’m Y/N, from the nanny agency. Are you Mr. Winchester?”

The man smiled politely and shook your hand before reaching down to scoop up Elsie. He held her on one hip and stepped aside, gesturing for you to come in. He didn’t even seem to be bothered that his shirt and jacket were now rumpled from being squashed by the little girl and her very fluffy tutu, nor did he seem phased when she reached out to hold onto the tie around his neck.

“It’s nice to meet you, Y/N. Please, call me Sam. I’m glad you could come on such short notice.”

“It’s not a problem,” you replied. You glanced around the entryway of Sam’s enormous house, a little surprised. It was grand, but compared to some of the others in the neighborhood, this house seemed more… lived in. Turning around, you smiled politely. “Is there anything you wanted to ask me that wasn’t in my file? I know that they already sent over my resume, references, and bio, but there’s always something that people want to know.”

Sam gave you a once-over before closing the door. “You’re a live-in nanny, right?” he asked. You nodded. “I don’t have any questions, but how about you check out the guest room before you decide if you want to stay? The last nanny we tried had some issues with it.”

“Issues?” you repeated, suddenly a bit more hesitant, and Sam gestured for you to follow him up the stairs. You did, glad that you’d left your suitcase in the car. The staircase was immense and it would’ve been a pain to drag it up all the way.

As you walked, Elsie chattered to Sam, who glanced at her and replied when necessary. You couldn’t hear everything they said, but it was clear that he cared deeply for her. Every nod, every thoughtful reply, every second of eye contact he offered her reassured you that this would be a good family to work with for your next position. It would certainly be better than your last one, that was for sure.

When you finally arrived at the opposite end of the hallway, Sam pushed open a door and gestured for you to enter first. You did, taking a look around. The “guest room” was more like a deluxe suite and you had to remind yourself not to let your mouth hang open as you took it all in. It made you wonder if there was some sort of housekeeper or maid that cleaned Sam’s house, because there was no way he kept the room as beautiful as it was, worked, and took care of his gorgeous little girl.

“It’s got an attached bathroom with a shower and a tub, and you’ll have your own private balcony. It overlooks the backyard and the pool, which you’re welcome to use at any time. There’s a walk-in closet through that door,” Sam pointed to a closed door off to the right of the bathroom, “And there’s an office across the hall you can use if you want. There’s a printer and internet hookups in case you’re having problems with the WiFi. You shouldn’t, but it never hurts to be prepared. Of course, if you don’t like the furniture I’ve got in here we can move it and you can put your own things in. I hired a decorator for the whole house when I first moved in and I haven’t done anything with the room since then.

You nodded, a bit overwhelmed. “Right. Can I ask what the issue was? That the last nanny had?”

“She didn’t like the view from the balcony, apparently, and she complained that she was too close to Elsie’s room.” You frowned and Sam shrugged. The distaste was clear in his voice as he continued, “She said she preferred to have a room near the other adults in the household instead of the child that she cares for. My room is on the other side of the stairs we came up.”

Elsie started to wiggle in his arms and he set her down, not looking away from you. She instantly ran over to the bed and climbed on top to sprawl out over the plush white comforter.

“The room is great, Sam,” you replied, nodding. “It’s amazing, actually.” You glanced back at Elsie and sat on the edge of the mattress. “How’s the bed? Comfy?”

Elsie giggled and nodded before rolling onto her stomach to look at Sam. “Is this my new nanny?”

“I think so,” Sam replied. He looked over at you and you nodded. “Looks like it, Elsie girl! You can show her your room and your playroom in a few minutes, okay? First we gotta do the grown-up stuff.”

Grinning, the little girl scrambled off the bed to run off to another part of the house. She shouted a quick “Okay!” on her way out of the room.

“So, you think you’d be okay being her nanny? Obviously I’ll let you look over the contract and you can take it to a lawyer if you need—”

“That’s not really necessary,” you told him, holding up your hand to stop Sam from going any further. “I’ll look it over downstairs if you wouldn’t mind getting me something to drink while I read.”

“Water okay?”

You nodded, and you and Sam headed downstairs where the contract was waiting.

_______________

Working for Sam was one of the best things that had ever happened to you. Not only was Elsie adorable and one of the smartest, funniest kids you’d ever nannied, but her dad was amazing, too. He never failed to make you laugh and though he was constantly overworking himself during the day, you admired the way that his focus was entirely on Elsie and his homelife as soon as he parked in the garage. Even if he finished work at three in the morning, he came looking for his daughter the minute he was home. If she was awake, she was always more than happy to cuddle up and watch a movie, go swimming in their pool, or just show him the pictures she’d worked on for him during the day. Then, as soon as the little princess was in bed, Sam’s attention turned to you. That was one of the best parts of your job, though it was becoming a problem. No matter what Sam did and despite your best efforts, your crush kept growing. He was just too great, and you worried that someday you’d be heartbroken when he brought home some gorgeous movie star. Then you’d have to quit, and not only would you be out of a job, but the best two people in your life would immediately become a part of your past. That was the last thing you wanted.

It wasn’t until you’d been the nanny for eight months that Sam asked you to bring Elsie to set. The request caught you off guard—usually he avoided involving Elsie in anything that had to do with his work because of the nature of his films—but you knew that he was a smart guy, so you loaded up the almost-five-year-old into your car and drove to the address he’d texted.

“Daddy!” Elsie squealed. Sam’s head turned towards you and he smiled wide when he saw Elsie dragging you by the hand across the packed dirt of the filming site. She had insisted on wearing her princess dress, and the sight of her in the poofy, sparkly dress and Minnie Mouse sunglasses was enough to make anyone laugh. You were thankful you’d put your own sunglasses on before you’d climbed out of the car, otherwise the sun’s glare would have been too bright for you to even see Sam. He had his glasses on as well, and you briefly wondered if he’d take them off at some point so you could see his eyes in the sunlight.

“Hi, Bug!” As soon as she was within his reach, Sam picked her up and swung her up onto his shoulders. The move was almost one fluid motion and though he did it all the time, you still marveled and Elsie still giggled.

The man Sam had been talking to—you vaguely recognized his face from a magazine in the grocery store checkout—was dressed in an elaborate suit of leather armor. He glanced over at you as you approached, but he quickly turned his attention back to Sam.

“So what are you going to do about her?” the man asked.

Sam glanced at him before looking up at Elsie, smiling wide. “We’ll have a talk. Don’t worry about it, Erick.”

Ah, so he’s the action hero, you thought, and you looked the actor up and down. He looks shorter in person.

Erick turned and caught you staring at him, and his lip curled up in disgust. “Who are you?”

“She’s my best friend!” Elsie replied before anyone else could. You smiled on instinct.

“Right...” Erick drawled. He looked up at Elsie and the disgusted look on his face didn’t fade even as he walked away to a u-shaped cluster of chairs and makeup vanities. He was immediately swarmed by women fussing over his hair, makeup, and costume.

Once he was fair enough away, you turned towards Sam with raised eyebrows. “So. This is the movie business,” you retorted.

He laughed and adjusted his grip on Elsie’s little legs. “Something like it, yeah. Don’t worry about him, he’s always like that. It’s not one of his redeeming features, but he was the favorite for this role. Do you guys want a tour of the set?”

Elsie cheered and wiggled a little on Sam’s shoulders, and he tightened his grip accordingly. You nodded in agreement.

“A tour would be great, Sam, but aren’t you on your lunch break?”

Sam shrugged and started walking. You followed close behind as he began to explain the set in terms that Elsie could understand. She was smart, and she loved big words, but she was still just a kid. After a while, he managed to commandeer a golf cart for the three of you, and you ended up riding around not only just the set, but in between all the trailers and the service roads that surrounded the site. You had to admit that the area was beautiful, even if it was hot and dusty.

Eventually, you, Sam, and Elsie ended up outside his trailer. It was smaller than the actors’, but he explained as you followed him up the steps that he really didn’t use it much, and he only had one for this part of production because they were filming in a more remote location than usual. Food was waiting for you on the small dining table inside, and all three of you breathed a sigh of relief at the air conditioning.

“Can I come to set tomorrow?” Elsie asked as she climbed up onto the couch.

Sam handed her the hot dog from the container marked with her name and smiled a little. “Not tomorrow, Ells. Maybe another day,” he said. He picked up the two remaining containers and held out the one with your name scrawled across the top.

After murmuring your thanks, you settled down on the opposite side of Elsie from him and opened the styrofoam box. Your favorite sandwich was inside and you smiled over at Sam, a little bit surprised that he’d remembered. He didn’t make or order you food often, since you normally ate with Elsie during the day and on your own at night so that Elsie’s attention wasn’t divided between the two of you.

“You mentioned that it was your favorite that one time we went to the boardwalk,” Sam said, noticing your surprise. “It just kinda stuck in my brain, and I saw it on the menu when I was ordering our lunches before you got here.”

“I can’t believe you remembered that,” you replied, honestly shocked. No one had ever remembered your usual order. “Thank you.”

Sam nodded in reply and the three of you dug into your meals in relative silence. Elsie finished first, like usual, and she was starting to dig through the things in Sam’s trailer when there was a knock at the door.

Elated, the little girl ran over and tugged it open, the force of which pushed her down to sit on the top step of the entry. “Hi!” she cried, and you sat up on the couch to see who she was talking to.

“Hi!” a woman chuckled. After a second, Elsie popped back up and led the short-haired woman into the trailer by the hand. “Is this your daughter, Sam?”

“No, this is a monster!” Sam grabbed Elsie around the waist and pulled her into his lap, growling playfully. Elsie squealed and squirmed as he tickled her, and the woman laughed. You smiled too, but you reached over to move Sam’s half-eaten meal out of the way. You’d seen this play out too many times to think that he and Elsie would be able to avoid knocking it onto the rug.

Elsie finally freed herself from Sam’s grasp and scrambled into yours. You wrapped them around her, hugging her tightly, and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. Sam caught your eye and grinned wide before looking back at the woman still standing in his trailer.

“What’s going on, Jody? Are we having a wardrobe problem again?” he asked, getting to his feet.

She shook her head. “No, but I heard a certain someone in here really likes princesses, and I thought I could give her a little tour of the wardrobe trailer,” Jody replied with a slow smile.

“Right, the wardrobe trailer with all the princess dresses…” Sam looked back at Elsie, who was watching him and Jody with wide eyes. She’d cued in on the key words in their conversation and was practically vibrating with excitement in your arms. “What do you say, Elsie? Would you like to go with Miss Jody to see the princess dresses for daddy’s movie?”

Elsie nodded vigorously and you let her down off your lap. She grabbed Jody’s outstretched hand with a wide smile and waved at Sam as she was led down the steps that led out of his trailer. The door slammed behind her and Jody, and after a second, you stood and gathered up two of the discarded lunch containers. 

Sam stared at you as you carried them over to the trash, and finally you looked up at him. “What?”

“Nothing,” he quickly replied, shaking his head. “Nothing.”

“You’re staring at me, Sam. There’s not something on the back of my pants, right? Or shirt?” You twisted, trying to get a look at your back just in case, and your face grew hot at the idea that you’d been walking around with Sam-freaking-Winchester, the super hot, award-winning director, all the while looking like a slob.

“No, no. I just…” Sam sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. He watched through the window as some of the crew members walked by outside, then dropped his hand back down and looked back at you. “We need to talk about something.”

Oh no.

“Sure, is everything okay?”

Sam sat back down on the couch and gestured for you to return to your own seat. You did, and you purposefully folded your hands in your lap so that you wouldn’t fidget and give away how nervous you felt. Your stomach was twisted up in knots.

“Yes. I mean, no, but… It’s a good kind of not okay.”

“Oh…Okay.”

“That didn’t make sense,” Sam said after a second.

“No, it didn’t,” you agreed, smiling a little. “Is this about Elsie? Is there something different you maybe want me to do with her? Or do you think it’s time for her to go back to a daycare, or even a preschool? She’s almost in Kindergarten anyway. I really don’t mind just watching her in the mornings and afternoons, if that’s what you need.”

“Do you not want to work with Elsie anymore?” His eyebrows furrowed and you quickly backtracked. “Because if you don’t—”

“No! No, I love Elsie. She’s an amazing kid, Sam. I just… I’m trying to figure out what you mean. A good kind of not okay?”

Sam sighed and nodded. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees for a few moments as he thought, then leaned back and relaxed against the couch cushions. You watched in silence, and with each passing second, the feeling that you might puke just from the suspense of the whole thing grew.

“I like you, Y/N. I like you a lot,” Sam finally said.

“I like you and Elsie too, Sam, but what’s that got to do with this?”

“No.” He shook his head, reaching over to put one large hand over your folded ones. You froze, absolutely stunned. Sam had never touched you except for handshakes, or maybe in passing when he took Elsie from you.

“Y/N, I really like you. I like you in the non-professional sense.”

Oh.

“I like you in the romantic sense,” Sam continued. “And I’d really like to see you romantically, but you’re my employee. I don’t want to cross any boundaries, and the only reason I’m telling you this is because I think that you might want the same thing.”

You swallowed, looking down. Slowly, you relaxed your grip on your hands and let him take one of them in his. After a second, his thumb began to rub over your skin and the feeling was hypnotizing. “I do. Want the same,” you added. “I’ve liked you a long time, Sam.”

“I don’t want you to feel pressured, Y/N.”

Looking up at him, you shook your head and squeezed his hand. “I don’t. I don’t feel pressured, Sam. I really do like you, and I was honestly worried I’d have to quit if you ever brought home some famous movie star or something. I wouldn’t have been able to handle it.”

Sam smiled wide, his eyes lighting up. “Do you know how long I’ve been wanting to hear you say that?” You shook your head. “A really long time, Y/N. Almost the whole time you’ve been Elsie’s nanny,” he admitted, and you grinned back at him.

Any nerves you’d had were completely gone now. Sam’s touch—even though it was just his thumb on the back of your hand—was more soothing than you could’ve ever imagined, and though the butterflies in your stomach were alive and well, you’d hoped for a while that you and Sam would have this conversation.

“Really?”

He nodded and brought your hand up to his lips to kiss it. The butterflies leaped for joy.

“That’s a long time. I didn’t even catch on,” you told him.

“I had to be careful. And to be honest, the only reason I suspected you liked me back is because Elsie started talking about how you and I act like one of her friend’s parents whenever we’re together. She started asking questions and it made me think.”

You laughed. “That little girl has got a brain bigger than yours. She’s gonna grow up amazing.”

Sam hadn’t stopped grinning at you and you felt your face grow warm under all the attention. If this was an old black and white movie, you would’ve swooned by now, but now his smile was beginning to fade. You sensed that the other shoe was about to drop and your own smile wilted.

“I’ve got you to thank for a lot of that,” Sam said, his voice softer. “We can’t be together if you're my employee, Y/N.”

“We’ll figure it out,” you murmured. After a second, you gave him a sly smile. “You and Elsie just need to put your big brains together.”

_______________

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[theramseyloft]

i read your long pigeon poop post, and after some poking around online i saw that a loft in melbourne australia failed. do you have any idea why that is?

Oh... my fucking God. I am so furious.

Look at this thing!

$70,000 went into this monstrosity?

It looks like they converted a fucking water tower by punching holes in it and welding on entryways shaped like the stereotypical toddler’s first house drawing!

Who fucking researched this?!

Was it designed by a committee purely by aesthetic?!

Here is an article I found on it’s decomission and removal.

https://www.theage.com.au/national/victoria/melbourne-city-councils-70000-pigeon-loft-turned-into-scrap-metal-20160724-gqcmsc.html

According to the pigeon expert quoted in this article: 

“Frank Hayes is the president of the Australian National Pigeon Association. While his group is mostly interested in show pigeons, a different breed to the city pests, he says it was fairly predictable the coop idea was never going to work.”

“ "The nature of the pigeon is that they find a home and they stick with it. So finding them somewhere else to go is a bit of a dream," said Mr Hayes.”

“ "Trying to shift them is one big headache. It's a worldwide problem and no one has ever figured out how to deal with it." ” 

LOOK at this structure!!!

It’s made of fucking METAL!!!

In AUSTRAILIA!!!

In the fucking OPEN!!!!

From this charming article:

 http://melbournedailyphotodaily.blogspot.com/2011/03/pigeon-loft-batman-park.html

“The loft is painted with light coloured corrosion resistant to reflect the heat and minimise internal over-heating. It houses two hundred nesting boxes for pigeon breeding. Eggs laid will be replaced with artificial eggs intended as a humane way to control and reduce pigeon numbers.”

That is a metal structure in the Melbourne sun...

No amount of Paint is gonna make that less an oven.

And I can’t imagine you can add anything to paint to make it corrosion resistant that isn’t noxious in a small space when the metal under it heats up.

“Bird feeding around the loft base is permitted to attract birds out of the CBD to this area. Bird feeding is not permitted in any other area around the CBD.”

But the city council is not actually providing the birds with good quality fed...

“... and no one has ever figured out how to deal with it."

No one, you ignorant twit?

NO ONE?!?!

Here is the site of a successful branch of the German Stadttauben Projekt, translated:

https://stadttauben-stuttgart.de/

“The Stuttgart pigeon project

Dear prospective customers,

nice that you found our homepage. We would like to introduce our project to you on the following pages:

The Stuttgart City Pigeon Project is an animal welfare-friendly concept for regulating and reducing city pigeons for the benefit of people and animals. We operate several supervised pigeon shots in the Stuttgart city area, in which the pigeons are cared for and their eggs are exchanged for dummies so that no offspring hatch. By the end of 2019, there had been well over 45,000 eggs. By feeding grain mixtures in our shots, the animals are no longer forced to look for food on the streets and squares in the area. They spend 80% of the day and the entire night in the dovecote. Ergo - your droppings also stay there and no longer land on roofs or balconies.

We were awarded the Baden-Württemberg State Animal Protection Award 2015 for our commitment .

The city pigeon is one of the most successful residents of the urban living space and today populates all major cities worldwide. It is the free-living descendant of the wild rock pigeons from the coastal and mountain areas in Africa and Eurasia. Long ago, the rock pigeons were domesticated by humans primarily for the purpose of meat production and thus also carried to our latitudes and cities. In modern times, the stock of the archetypal rock pigeon increasingly mixed with breeding, racing and sports pigeons that either escaped, were abandoned or, exhausted by exhausting competitive flights, ran aground in the cities. Today's city pigeons are the overgrown children and children's children of these rock, breeding and sports pigeons.

In cooperation with the state capital of Stuttgart, the Tierschutzverein Stuttgart und Umgebung eV launched the pigeon project in 2008. The cooperation was formed with the aim of bringing about a permanent and humane solution to the city pigeon problem.

The concept of the Federal Working Group for City Pigeons or the so-called * Augsburg Model * was helpful. It is based on scientific publications, practical experience and has already been successfully recommended by several federal states such as Hesse, North Rhine-Westphalia and Baden-Württemberg. Today it is implemented in more than 80 German cities and towns. For example, there are pigeon houses looked after in Aachen, Augsburg, Hamburg, Berlin, Frankfurt, Saarbrücken and Wuppertal.

We aim for a small, supervised and healthy pigeon population in Stuttgart. Then the image of the city pigeon may rise again. Because healthy animals, which have a permanent home and receive animal feed, do not bother anyone!”

https://stadttauben-stuttgart.de/?page=1,0,0,Chronik+%26+Fakten

“Care instead of fighting: our chronicle

2008:The first step was a dovecote at platform 1 in Stuttgart main station

2009:The second blow was made in the roof of the Leonhardskirche

2009:The third pigeon house was on the Mühlgrün parking garage in Bad-Cannstatt, which has since been demolished and replaced by the pigeon tower in the rope

2010:The fourth facility was the pigeon tower in the city garden on Max-Kade-Weg

2011:The fifth pigeon house stood on the roof of the town hall garage until February 2016. Reconstruction on the roof of the city comb in April 2016.

2011:The sixth dovecote was a second stroke on the roof of the Leonhardskirche (other roof side)

2013:The seventh dovecote was built in the roof of the Fairkauf building in Stuttgart-Feuerbach

2014:The eighth pigeon loft was built (as a replacement for the location at the main station) on a flat roof in the Kriegsbergstrasse

2016:Dovecote number 9 was inaugurated in July 2016 at the Marienplatz in Stuttgart in the roof structure of the imperial building

2017:

On Landhausstrasse in the east of Stuttgart, we were able to set up dovecote No. 10 in the attic of a residential building. It was opened in June 2017

2018:In summer, an indoor pigeon tower was opened at Seilerwasen in Bad Cannstatt as a replacement for the Mühlgrün pigeon house

2019In autumn a new pigeon facility was inaugurated at the station in Zuffenhausen and the first egg was laid in December.    

In addition, a dovecote (trailer) on the grounds of the shelter Stuttgart and Nistwand for about 30 pigeons on the will of the ASPCA Stuttgart  House  Adam Müller-Guttenbrunn in Stuttgart Zuffenhausen care.

... more dovecotes are to follow!

Health hazard facts

A health hazard due to pigeons flying around, running and sitting can be largely excluded. New scientific studies have shown (again) that pathogens that may be contained in the pigeon droppings are usually bird-specific and are therefore not transmitted to humans. This was confirmed in 1995 by the Federal Ministry of Health.

The general classification of the pigeon as a pest was withdrawn by the Federal Institute for Consumer Health Protection back in 1989 on the basis of research results at the time and the opinion from 2001.

Feed facts about pigeons

Feeding pigeons in Stuttgart is prohibited on public land. Well-meaning pigeon friends increase the population density of the city pigeons by regular feeding in the same place, without offering the additionally attracted animals sleeping and nesting places where they are tolerated or the clutch can be exchanged. This creates people who work there or often live more pigeon hate and more pigeon misery.

Above all, too many food scraps are thrown away on the streets and squares of the city! This waste is mostly not compatible with pigeons. They lead to illnesses, shortages and thus, among other things, to the unsightly liquid starvation. Nevertheless, due to the scarcity of bird-friendly feed in cities, these human foods are usually the main basis for the feeding of city pigeons, but their organism is designed for pure hard grain feed. So this means sick pigeon populations that nonetheless reproduce disproportionately due to their (pet) genes raised by humans.

If you would like to help sustainably, please contact us. Only other supervised dovecotes in the city area (including food and egg exchange) start at the root of the "problem". We welcome any support!”

From their gallery:

Here is a loft.

Small, wooden, well insulated from heat and cold.

Those openings are not the nests. They are just doorways with a landing ledge designed around the comfort of pigeons, which are social birds.

Here is the inside.

Lots of comfortable nest boxes, perches in the back, food, water, comfortable socialization space...

Here is an entry into another loft currently in use.

Here is the inside.

Water and feed are provided by the care takers. You can see feed and drinking stations all over the floor.

And this is the inside of a huge new loft in Frankfurt.

These German Taubbenhauses are designed around meeting the birds’ needs for food, comfort, safety from the elements, and socialization with their flock mates.

None of these birds had to be coerced or forcibly relocated.

Because their needs were better met, they came on their own.

Look at the $70,000 Melbourne monstronsity again!

More specifically, look at the bridge behind it.

And tell me where you would rather me.

Compact metal tower designed exclusively around convenient human access, metal nest boxes, 0 landing platforms, no socialization space, no protection from the elements, still no choice but to forage for what ever garbage people toss you...

or the comfortably Cool space under a concrete bridge with a convenient water source.

Three guesses what’s more comfortable for the pigeons.

Now, would you rather live under a bridge with constant noise from traffic, open to predators, 

or

A well insulated apartment building with comfortable suites, a spacious common area, and a nutritious free meal plan with clean water included by default.

"It's a worldwide problem and no one has ever figured out how to deal with it."

My ass, Mr. Hayes!

[rahleeyah]

IMAGINE if you will. to go along with the below anon and your POV fics. And I mean this with the utmost respect for you and your ideas. YOU ARE AN INSPIRATION!

BUT BEWARE BESTIE. It ends in the middle because in my mind I don’t know where it would go from there. How would liv and Elliot interact in a professional setting but they are together and their personal lives? What would they talk about? This is new territory for them and I can imagine them being super private about their relationship in the workplace and not wanting to show too much.

Feel free to end it for me! Or rewrite as a whole fic. I can’t and could never capture the characters as well as you. LOL 🤣🥰

They hire someone else to replace Morales and this guy only knows the basics of what happened the year before with Wheatley. He knows the case, that Morales was the mole, and pretty much just what he had seen on the news. 

The squad doesn’t talk about the Wheatley case much and is focusing their attention on their new case. They’ve all been working crazy hours and this new guy knows bell and Stabler, being the leads, haven’t been home at a decent time in days. 

Bell has made comments here and there about her wife being upset at her, but knows it’s the job and this stage of the case doesn’t last forever- but they still don’t see eye to eye on it sometimes. The rest of the squad goes around talking about their lack of social life while laughing and discussing where they’re going to happy hour later-if they get out soon enough.

This guy has noticed though that usually, Stabler just smiles laughs and goes along with the squad but rarely offers any information himself. In fact, he doesn’t think he knows anything about Stabler’s life outside of the squad room.  Not that he hasn’t asked about what the deal is, but usually people tell him to mind his business or to get back to work. 

Until one night it’s just him, Sloot, and Washburn and he hears two kids arguing in the entryway about (enter problem here) and a woman telling them that they’ll figure it out when they get home.  he assumes that this woman is their mother. They all said share similar features and the younger one had even exclaimed that she was when arguing with her about why he didn’t get his way.

She’s leading them into the squad room while looking down at her phone and the older child is carrying a substantial amount of Chinese food. Sloot and Washburn are going over something on the computer and haven’t noticed this woman walk in with her kids so now guesses he has to deal with it.

What is this woman lost? Who comes in here with a couple kids? He had never seen her before and from what he was told this location was pretty secure. 

By now Washburn and Sloot have finished their conversation and he asks this woman if he can help her. It comes out just as exasperated as he feels and she is clearly shocked at the greeting she is getting. The two go back-and-forth, with this woman being understanding, for a little while before he notices that Washburn is behind him laughing. Even more annoyed now he turns around to snap at Washburn. But before he can, Washburn greets this woman and it’s clear that he knows her.

He greets her as Captain Benson and regret is immediately etched on his face. He will knows he will get shit for this later or worse if Stabler and Bell find out. Being disrespectful to a senior officer is a big no-no around here. How was he supposed to know this woman was a captain? Who was she and who are these kids?

It was just then that the younger one high-fives Sloot before turning to his mother and asking where his dad is. Sloot looks at the woman and responds to the child that he should be back soon. They were out following up on a lead and are expected back any minute. Shit. He knows Bell and Stabler are out but for once never made any connection. He can hear Washburn continue to laugh as the confusion is clearly written on his face. Washburn makes some comment about how he’s going to hear it from stabler when he returns. 

The older child has since put down the food they brought for everyone and unlocked his phone to scroll through various apps. Everyone’s head turns in the opposite direction towards the door when it slams open and their commanding officers walk through the door. It’s clear they’re both upset. But whether it’s from exhaustion or their lead not panning out, no one is certain.

...

ANON!!! 🙌🙌🙌🙌 FUCK me this is good lmao

Ok ok ok so new guy let's call him Taylor. Taylor's standing there, looking at this woman he doesn't know, this Captain he has just insulted, however inadvertantly, this Captain who turned up with her hands full of Chinese and her kids.

Bell and Stabler, they're grumbling together as they come walking up, not paying much attention to anything else, but then Bell catches sight of the woman, and she offers a tired little smile.

"Reinforcements?" She asks as they approach. She reaches out, shakes hands with the Captain.

"Dinner," the Captain says. "There's enough for everybody," she adds, and shoots Taylor a knowing look. He wonders if she can see that his face is hot from embarrassment.

"You're a saint," Stabler tells her, steps up to kiss her cheek. He reaches for her hand, too, gives it a little squeeze while he's at it.

Holy shit, Taylor thinks. The kid was asking about his dad and then here's Stabler, kissing the kid's mom. This woman, she's his wife, and those kids, they're Stabler's kids, he thinks, and shit, how did he not know? Not know that Stabler was married, not know that his wife's a Captain, not know about the kids? Yeah, Stabler never talked about his home life, but shit.

"Hardly," the Captain laughs. Bell is busy dishing out the food, and she and Washburn and Sloot are ignoring Stabler, and his woman, and the boys. Taylor knows he should, too, but he can't help but watch. He's a cop, it's his job to be curious.

"We brought you a toothbrush!" The little one pipes up, holds up a toothbrush still in its packaging, proud.

"And a clean shirt," the older one says, not looking up from his phone.

It's just so...nice. Since Taylor's been there, Stabler's been a hard ass with a smart mouth, quiet sometimes, cocky sometimes, but he's never been soft. Just now, though, with his family, he looks warm. At peace.

"We just wanted to see you," the woman tells him softly. Stabler reaches out, tussles the little boy's hair, but his eyes are locked on the kid's mom. On the wife he hasn't seen for two days, the woman he clearly wants, but can't have in the middle of the station, in the middle of a case.

"One more day, Liv," he says. "We're close."

"You don't have to explain yourself to me," she tells him, and Taylor's thinking that's probably true. She's a cop, too. She knows what the life is.

"Stay," he says. "Eat with us."

And so they do; they all stand around the table together, Washburn and Sloot and Taylor and Bell and Stabler and his Captain and his sons. Noah and Eli, Taylor learns their names, sees how comfortable they are with the rest of the team, how kindly Bell treats them. How no one else seems to think this is weird. It doesn't last too long, tho.

"I'll walk you out," Stabler says, and herds his family from the room. Mom is holding Noah's hand, and Stabler has one hand at the small of her back and one hand on Eli's shoulder. Taylor wonders if he walked them out just to get a chance to kiss his woman in private. Probably so.

"Listen to me very carefully," Bell says to Taylor once the Stablers are out of sight. "You do not ask him about his family." Her voice is deadly serious. "That man's had a hard road, he doesn't need you getting all up in his business."

"Doesn't look too hard to me," Taylor says. "Beautiful wife who loves him, two nice kids, he's got a clean shirt and none of the rest of us do."

"You don't have any idea what you're talking about," Bell says, shaking her head. "I'm just telling you, leave that man alone. And don't let him hear you call her his wife. I don't wanna have to break in two new detectives after he beats your ass."

And that makes no sense at all, but Taylor isn't stupid enough to go against his CO, no matter how curious he is about all this. So he won't ask, and he won't use the word wife, but he's got questions, and he's gonna bide his time, and keep his eyes open.

Stabler comes back, and he's actually smiling. He's had a hard road, according to Bell, but even if that's true, he looks like he's found his feet. Good for him, Taylor thinks.

"All right kids, back to work!" Stabler calls cheerfully.

It's gonna be a long night.

[iliveiloveiwrite]

Surprise!

A/N: AND THE FLUFF TO FOLLOW THE ANGST! I have something close to 20 requests sitting in my inbox and yet my brain tells me to stay up until almost four in the morning writing Draco fluff (that hasn't been requested) because I am a simp for this man. I am getting to your requests, I promise you, I just didn't expect this many! So please be patient with me. And I know I always write Draco as a Healer but I will take this trope with me to the grave. Also, all of my medical knowledge stems from shows like ER so forgive me for inaccuracies. AND on top of this, I’m less than 10 followers away from 700 so thank you all who follow me and deal with my ramblings on a daily basis! As always, I hope you enjoy and I hope you know that I love you all!

Summary: A surprise at work.

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x Fem!Reader

Warnings: none - fluff

Word count: 2.2k

It hadn’t been a particularly long shift; long in the sense where time dragged on. It was long in the sense that all he wanted to do was to go home to you.

He had his evening planned in his head; good food, favourite TV show ready, and you – laid between his legs, leaning back against his chest onto his chest for cuddles.

Truthfully, he just wanted cuddles.

But he couldn’t admit that to the Head Nurse Martha as she berates him for sighing for the third time in a minute.

“Malfoy, I love you like my own son but if you don’t stop sighing and go to see this patient, I’m afraid I’ll have to accidently forget your coffee all next week.”

Draco gasps, “Martha, you wouldn’t.”

“Sigh again and watch me, Draco.”

Draco holds his hands up, relenting; not willing to risk his coffee or Martha’s wrath, “Alright, alright. You win – now who’s the patient?”

“Six-year-old girl, severe burns to her forearms from a spilt potion. She wanted to help her mother, bless her.”

Draco takes the chart from Martha; walking towards curtain area five.

Little Jenny had only wanted to help her mum and she had landed herself in the emergency room at St. Mungo’s. She was the perfect patient – did not cry and did not fuss. He cleaned the burns; debrided them and then used ‘Ferula’ to ensure minimal scarring. Jenny’s mother thanked him profusely as they left the curtain area to return home.

For Draco, patients like Jenny are what make the job worth it. They’re what keep him clocking in day after day. It’s the joy and gratitude from parents and family members when he arrives with good news; that yes, he can heal this, no it isn’t life-threatening.

For as long as he can remember, Draco was pushed into thinking a job in the Ministry of Magic would be perfect for him. Decent hours, decent pay, good holidays – what more could you want?

But Draco had never followed the rules; he wasn’t bothered about how long he would have to work as long as it was rewarding; he didn’t care about pay as long as he loved his job. He applied for the Healer training programme straight out of Hogwarts and was thrilled to be accepted.

It had taken years of hard work. Years of all-nighters, exams, stress and his tears but it was all entirely worth it the minute he was handed his full licence and a job in the emergency room.

He couldn’t take all the credit though; you had been by his side through it all. Quizzing him on the flashcards; making the coffee; drying his eyes if it all become too much.

Draco shakes himself out his reminiscing as he’s overwhelmed by a strong sense of missing you. He’s a lovesick fool, and he knows it.

Draco places the chart in the ‘discharged’ section; taking the offered cup of coffee from Martha’s hands. The caffeine addiction had started early in his career, and it was one that Martha and you were happy to indulge.

“Martha, you are my saviour.”

“Draco,” Martha starts, raising an eyebrow, “You are so full of it.”

He laughs, leaning against the triage desk, looking up at the admit board, “Anyone else for me?”

“Eager for more already? You did come back from your annual leave ready.”

Draco ducks his head, “Actually, I was hoping for some more patients to keep me busy, so I don’t turn around and go home.”

Martha chuckles, “You’ve got it bad.”

Draco smiles, “I don’t deny it. Are there any more waiting to be seen?”

Martha shakes her head, “Sorry, love. Everyone’s covered right now.”

He nods, understanding.

“Why don’t you go into the lounge? I’m sure you’ll have left some unfinished paperwork before your holiday.”

“You’re probably right,” He says, draining the last dregs of his coffee. “I’ll head there now.”

“Dear, there’s no ‘probably’ about it. I’m always right.” Martha states as a goodbye.

“Come get me if I’m needed.” Draco replies in parting.

Martha doesn’t reply; she rolls her eyes at the young doctor before returning to her paperwork.

The lounge isn’t a very large room; big enough to fit a few lockers, a battered old couch, a table and a fridge. Used by Healers and Nurses alike, Draco doesn’t think twice before pushing open the door.

Only to freeze in the entryway.

You’re here.

At St. Mungo’s; sitting on the battered old couch.

You grin at Draco; pressing a finger to your lips, telling him to keep quiet as your eyes flash down to the bundle of blankets in your arms.

Draco can’t help the smile that breaks across his face as he tiptoes over to you and the baby.

“What are you doing here?” He whispers; holding his hands out for his daughter.

“We thought we’d surprise you on your first day back.” You reply; handing your sleeping daughter over to her father. She fusses slightly at the change but quickly settles back into her dreams.

Draco cradles her in his arms; gazing at her face for only a moment before meeting your eyes, “Consider me surprised.”

“We knew you’d miss us too much,” You tease.

Draco holds his daughter in one arm; confidently cradling her head as he wraps his other arm around your shoulders, pressing one kiss to your forehead and another to your lips.

“Hi,” He whispers, greeting you at last.

You grin at him, “Hey there.”

His daughter shifts in his arms; finding a comfier position. Both you and Draco freeze, watching her so intently. She settles back to sleep in less than second; seeming more settled now that she’s in her father’s arms.

“You’re right,” Draco murmurs, “I do miss you. I’ve been driving Martha mad all shift. She’s threatened to take my coffee away.”

You gasp, “Well we can’t have that.”

“No, we can’t” He says, agreeing wholeheartedly.

You fold your daughter’s blanket on your lap; knowing that she would be warm enough in her father’s arms. “I hoped she would stay awake long enough for you to see her but alas, the minute we got onto the tube, she was fast asleep.”

“I don’t mind; having you both here is enough. I’ve been counting down the minutes until the end of my shift.” He confesses. He has; he’s been watching the clock since he put on his white coat; wishing for time to go that little bit faster just this once so he could go home and cuddle you and kiss his daughter goodnight.

“You sap,” You tease, but there’s no malice. You adore seeing Draco with his daughter. He had been so scared from the moment you told him you were pregnant with her; terrified of the type of father he would be, but the moment she arrived, he stepped into the role with such grace it was hard to believe that he hadn’t done it before.

“Only for you two,” Draco coos.

Draco doesn’t know how long he remains holed up in the lounge with his family. He just enjoys the time he can spend with them before he’s inevitably called away.

Quiet conversation is spoken between the two of you; mindless conversation about anything and everything. You told him how Narcissa and Lucius visited today bringing more gifts for your daughter.

“They’re completely wrapped around her finger.” You murmur, humour lacing your voice.

He chuckles, thinking of his parents who adored their granddaughter – find any and all excuses to come visit. “Who wouldn’t be? She’s adorable.” Draco replies, motioning to the sleeping baby in his arms.

“That is true. She looks so much like you, Draco. I can’t get over it.” And it’s true; she has his grey/blue eyes and is showing the first signs of having his blonde hair. She’s going to be heartbreakingly pretty.

“She’ll have your brains, love. I know it. How many degrees do you have now?”

You roll your eyes at your husband, “Just three. I’ll wait until she’s a bit older before I think about enrolling for my doctorate.”

Draco shakes his head, “My wife – the wonder woman. First for marrying me, then for having my daughter, and now for going back to school. You amaze me.”

“Oh hush. You’ll make me blush.”

Silence falls between the two of you; both turning your attention back to the baby dozing safely in her father’s arms. Draco lost feeling in that arm a while back but he won’t mention it; he won’t ruin this moment with his family. He never thought his heart would be big enough to love; then he met you and he found out that there was just enough room in his heart for one. Then upon the birth of his daughter, his heart stretched again and made room for her. He had loved her from the moment you announced your pregnancy but fell in love all over again the moment he held her in his arms.

He shifts slightly; taking care not to jostle your daughter. “Thank you for coming; I needed this.”

You stroke his cheek with your thumb, “It’s no problem. I missed you too. But you’ll have to thank Martha as well.”

“Why?”

“She sent us a message about two hours into your shift asking if I’d come and see you. She could see that you were missing us.”

“Martha is a wonderful woman.”

“She is. Thank her for us as well. We really were missing you.”

Your daughter coos; all conversation coming to a halt as your attentions fall to her. She shifts again, cooing one more time before falling back silent.

“She’s dreaming,” He says, voice slightly breathless as if he can’t believe what he’s witnessing.

“She is,” Your voice matching his.

Martha pokes her head around the door; heart softening at the sight before her. Draco’s arm wrapped around your shoulders as you both watch your daughter sleep; utterly captivated by her.

It hurts Martha to break up the scene, but she must. A case has come in sure to keep Draco distracted long enough for time to pass faster for him.

“Draco,” Martha calls softly from the door.

Draco looks up, sighing as he realises what her presence means. “I’ll be right there, Martha, thank you.”

Martha nods, greeting (Y/N) with a large smile before closing the door quietly behind her.

Draco hands over your daughter somewhat reluctantly; already wishing to have her back in his arms. You drop a kiss to her forehead before placing her ever so gently into her pram and draping the small blanket over her. Draco leans down into the pram to kiss her forehead too; inhaling the scent of talcum powder.

Draco places a long kiss to your lips before whispering goodbye.

“You’ll be home soon,” You promise.

“It seems so far away,” He whines.

You can’t help the feeling of delight that runs through you; at how Draco wants his shift to end sooner so he can be at home with you and your daughter. In the months since she was born, he’s dedicated himself entirely to role of husband and father. So much so that his profession as a Healer dropped down the list of importance.

You peck his lips, “It’ll be over before you know it.”

Draco sighs, nodding at you. You’re right, of course you are.

You let Draco walk you both to the main entrance; Draco walking the pram until he has to let you go. He wraps you in an embrace; hiding his face in your hair, keeping one hand on the pram.

“I’ll see you at home,” You murmur into his shoulder.

“I’ll see you at home,” He affirms.

Draco watches you walk away; wishing he was walking alongside you. He has to resist the urge to run after you and skive off his entire shift. He forces himself to turn from your retreating figure and drags his feet back to the emergency room.

Draco squeezes Martha’s shoulder when he next passes her at the triage desk. “Thank you,” He murmurs, loud enough for her to hear.

Martha chuckles, patting his hand, “You’re welcome. I remember how it was when I had to leave my eldest for the first time. I think I snuck off to the bathroom enough times to cry.”

“I know that feeling.”

“You’ve got a gorgeous little family, Draco. You’d be stupid not to miss them.”

Draco smiles at the elderly Head Nurse, “Any new patients then? Let’s get me through this shift so I can kiss my wife and daughter when I get home.”

“Aye, aye, Healer.” Martha jokes before handing him a chart, “Eighteen-year-old male; celebrating his graduation from Hogwarts. Too much firewhisky – he fell through a plate glass window, blood everywhere.”

“Sounds like a lot of work,” He muses.

Martha nods solemnly, “It could even take hours.”

Draco takes the chart from Martha, repeating his words from earlier, “Martha, you are my saviour.”

“Go on. The quicker you’re there; the quicker you’re home to your wife and baby.”

Draco grins; skim reading the chart as he walks to curtain area two.

Four hours to go until he was home.

This case wouldn’t take five hours to heal but it would cut a large chunk of time out.

Four hours to go until he’s home with you and your daughter.

****

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Draco Malfoy taglist: @cheapglitter @the--queen-of-hell @in-slytherin-we-trust