#non mii related

[itsokjuju]

if these two made eye contact with each other the world would combust

[phvntomess]

NEW MSM ISLAND SPOILERS I THINK

only three monsters and my island already sounds incredible. i’ve ascended.

anyways ppl need to give withur more credit her part is subtle but CRUCIAL. SHES AMAZING MY FHISJFKWJCJF LIKE ARE U HEARING THIS?1?!/?;?!;!,

[miiblr]

almost 100 followers ?!?!?!? that's so cool!!!!

[thebananwithaplan]

She just got here and at this point she's not even sure if she wants to ask what's going on-

[mysimspc]

(from MySims Chat Event with some team members)

(this is not the full chat, this is just me taking notes. its also out of order.)

TechNick (Oct 10, 2007 6:23:08 PM) Why didn't you use Mii's in mysims? MySimsTim (Oct 10, 2007 6:23:08 PM) MySims was already in development long before the Mii's were even announce. In fact the Wii was still called the Revolution when we started making the game. We fell in love with our characters and were already make them long before we ever saw the Mii's.

PreppyChic (Oct 10, 2007 6:38:21 PM) Are any characters based off of real people (like someone on the design team, or a friend, etc.)? MySimsBrian (Oct 10, 2007 6:38:21 PM) Hmm...I have been accused of sneaking my friends and family members into the design. I deny it all!!! Actually, there is a character in the game named Matt who is obsessed with game shows. He was inspired by my real life brother.

sexyferg2 (Oct 10, 2007 6:07:30 PM) what inspired the cartoony animal crossing theme of the game? MySimsTim (Oct 10, 2007 6:07:30 PM) It was really the decision to make the game for the Wii. We wanted a game that really felt like it was made for Nintendo fans. That said, they are still Sims to us - just a little shorter and squarer.

Guest (Oct 10, 2007 6:21:00 PM) this game is so cool! how did you get the idea to make it? MySimsTim (Oct 10, 2007 6:21:00 PM) Well it was really prompted by a conversation a couple years ago. It was a "what if" type of conversation. What if there was a really approachability version of The Sims where everyone was made with blocks. That was really the kernal of the idea that eventually became MySims.

jennyvier (Oct 10, 2007 6:27:30 PM) I have to ask - What was the idea behind 'Plane Vs. Eye?' It crack me up everytime I watch my sim play it! MySimsHunter (Oct 10, 2007 6:27:30 PM) Well, it was pretty much right out of the brains of one of our artists. He went off to make an arcade machine, it came back as Plane vs. Eye, and the team loved it. The game is full of PvE references. :)

Pirategirl (Oct 10, 2007 6:27:40 PM) Where did you get the inspiration for the charcters? They're very different from each other. MySimsBrian (Oct 10, 2007 6:27:40 PM) A lot of the characters are tied to their businesses. What would an arcade guy be like? What's funny about the librarian? Many of the Townie characters were discovered just by playing around in the character creator and finding an interesting look!

jennyvier (Oct 10, 2007 6:29:29 PM) I'm a fan of the fact that the 2 mayors in the DS version and the Wii version are related - a cute little addition for those who bought both games! MySimsBrian (Oct 10, 2007 6:29:29 PM) Ha! I remember talking about this with a producer on the DS game and thinking "No one is EVER going to notice this joke!" Good eye!

Guest (Oct 10, 2007 6:30:06 PM) how long did it take u guys to "make/design" the game?? MySimsTim (Oct 10, 2007 6:30:06 PM) We started making MySims in January 2006.

Macomi8 (Oct 10, 2007 6:32:38 PM) Are there any essences you wanted to include in the game, but didn't have room to? MySimsIan (Oct 10, 2007 6:32:38 PM) We really wanted to have zombieweed and yeti's-bane plants… oh well! MySimsHunter (Oct 10, 2007 6:32:44 PM) Dont forget pinecones, everybody's favorite non-edible fruit.

MySimsMelanie (Oct 10, 2007 6:33:15 PM) we also wanted to have a hedgehog essence

ManagerJosh (Oct 10, 2007 6:42:21 PM) What experience did you take from developing games like The Sims 2 that influenced decisions for MySims? MySimsTim (Oct 10, 2007 6:42:21 PM) Well Josh, since many of us are from the Sims 2 team. We took a lot. The main things we are wanted to incorporate were the creativity and humor that are so much a part of every Sims game.

TinkerBell (Oct 10, 2007 6:43:19 PM) I just have to say... I love the tip that you get at 5 stars that says "hold on, let me just reticulate those splines for you..." I crack up every time I read that one. I love how you guys throw things from Sims into MySims MySimsTim (Oct 10, 2007 6:43:19 PM) That makes Brian and Hunter very happy. That you're reading all the text and you're getting the in-jokes.

MySimsBrian (Oct 10, 2007 6:49:00 PM) Violet and Poppy were the first characters I ever designed for the game, so they have a very special place in my heart.

SoulreaperSpencer95 (Oct 10, 2007 6:37:43 PM) Can u move Poppy out because she looks corny? MySimsIan (Oct 10, 2007 6:37:43 PM) You can banish poppy forever, cursed to wander in the twisting nether outside of the town for all eternity… or at least until you invite her back!

TheProgrammer (Oct 10, 2007 6:41:56 PM) Is it possible to create a backyard in the game and make a Barbecue and invite friends over to eat? MySimsIan (Oct 10, 2007 6:41:56 PM) Why would you want to eat your friends?

[loveletterworm]

Ok the old drawings I kept talking about as promised

Back in January 2021 I briefly got really into chess for some reason (not good at it just really into it) and spent some time trying to make up some array of chess-based guys...which was mostly just like vaguely-anime people in silly hats I've never claimed to have extremely exciting ideas. I kept never posting them for some reason I think I was like self-conscious because i thought the idea felt really generic even though it probably wasn't that severe

I do remember they had "lore" though I think! Namely:

The pawns were just like little entirely non-human looking guys because pawn promotion was an extremely literal phenomenon due to magic or something (speaking of the pawns i remembered them having little floating hands like miis but apparently i only drew this on paper and not digitally)

The black pieces were supposed to be from like a mirror world which is why they're just palette swaps because I was kind of lazy (still logically there should have been 2 actual different designs of most of the pieces since there's 2 on each side for 3 of them...there weren't supposed to be that many literal clones but I never really got around to making any second ones)

Chess rulebooks were considered a religious text to them because I thought that would be kind of funny

I only ever really came up with the knight and the bishop though....And the pawns but they were easy because i made them just be little guys. I got completely stuck once I got to the rook because I didn't know what to do with them at all or what they would even be doing because it's really hard to figure out how to make a castle a person. (later my friend suggested they could have been archers which was a good idea but i never drew anything relating to that) I do still have a paper from 2021 with my fruitless attempts to make a rook on it though so you can see how stumped i was about the matter:

(actually most of my drawings relating to this were on papers which i still have but i can't be bothered to go dig all of them out again right now i took the above photo yesterday...most of them weren't interesting)

[themiiofalltime]

hello fellow mii enjoyers! i hope you enjoyed round 2 of the mii of all time tournament. due to the fact that the majority of my existence has been consumed by zelda totk, the round 3 polls don’t have any kind of start date yet.

however, i can let you know that round 3 is gonna be a little different. the polls are going to run as triples: instead of mii vs mii (2), it will be mii vs mii vs mii (3). most likely a, b, c and d will run at the same time and will last a week long, or at least that’s the plan. they’re lasting longer because some of the matchups are really quite high levels of putting bad bitches against each other- i don’t remember them all of the top of my head but 3b is gonna be matt vs magical john vs eteled so that’ll be wild.

i’ll let you know when i get round to sorting things out. till then, enjoy all your mii-related activities and also your non-mii-related activities!

[wii-no-ma]

My new main for non mii related stuff is @transfigureddreams

in case anyone wants to follow me for non mii related stuff c:

[kanasnaur]

if you know @kanasn0w then hi thats me

made this acc for my non mii related interests (and maybe ab oc x cc if yall are nice enough ab it)

[notmalatalldefinitely]

THE COOK Darren

Darren is just an actual irl childhood friend i have. We stopped talking regularly by the time i made this mii, but i think it made it kinda funnier. What's more, because of his vague knowledge of the inside jokes of my current friend group due to being invited to our minecraft server, a while, he chose his war cry after i asked him as "FOR WINCAR AND GLORY", making him become not only a fatefull ally, but also a loyal devout to our powerful great sage

THE GODESS Moom mom

The theme of failboat related shenanigans was slowly starting to set in, and solidified by having none other than his fictional mother join our ranks. Moom mom, mother to not only Failboat but his brother, Wincar, became the princess of our group, fighting alongside all... Unsurprisingly, Darren quickly started developing a bond with her.

THE FATED Hajimii Miinata

As the path unveiled against our final foe, Nagito Komaeda, only one person was fit to join our group as our last party member... And it was none other than the protagonist to our antagonist, and the only non-oc fictional character yet, Hajime Hina- I'm sorry. Hajimii Miinata. Hajimii was also a tank, and by extention very hated by all. We still kept him around though.

[itsokjuju]

its literally them though

[darklordss]

experimenting

[gameboyhamazing]

Stop liking my herlock sholmes eggert Benedict shitpost I’ve posted more art I’ve made today than I have in the past like 4 or 5 months why is my textpost shitpost the thing people are liking

I mean it’s tumblr clout but still

[mystic-faraday]

UTIL Plays Phoenix Wright: Justice For All (Case: Turnabout Bigtop... *sighs*)

(We had a drinking game going on while playing this case, if you would like to play your own version of the Turnabout Big Top drinking game, you can find it HERE )

- “Time for the worst case”

- “Breaking news: spirit channeling is a STEM FIELD! NOT magic.”

- Phoenix VA:  “Alright pearl you’re gonna learn about gay people” Pearl VA:  “I hope you have a good night and learn about gay people like me” Franziska VA: “Oh I think he already knows sweetie”

- Pearl “I wanna be gay when I grow up” Fey

- Max :“you’ve got to be pulling my magic wand” Everyone in call collectively: NOPE,NO NO NON O

- “Are those homestuck horns on his desk?”  “It’s a moustache!”  *unanimous chanting* “Model magic moustache!” 

- Miles VA: “I like knitting” Franziska VA: “And I like coins” Together: “We did not come out of the same loins”

-"cotton eyed m--" "HOW BOUT COTTON EYE NO?????"

-Gumshoe VA:  "Maybe I did wanna be a magician, maybe I didn't. what are you, a cop?"

-”Why does Moe have a set of suspenders that have such a defined butt?” “THOSE PANTS IMPLY MOE HAS A DUMPTRUCK ASS”

- Moe: Appears for the first time and tells his first joke Entire VC: silent as everyone takes a drink

- Maya: “Phoenix Laugh!” Phoenix VA:“Har, Har, Har, Har, Har *opens flask* har har **takes sip*”

- “We all have a metaphorical carrot in front of our faces…or something”

- “Guys, does Moe Fuck??? “OBJECTION: no one wants to hear the answer to that” “Well he’s got that Dumptruck Ass” “Moe the clown more like Hoe the clown”

- “What if we kissed under the carrot mistletoe and we were both clowns”

-We uncovered the collective truth that Manfred von Karma, like every single other person in the ace attorney series, is transgender, and therefore did not need to sleep with anyone to create Franziska 

- “The straightest character in this series is Trilo ‘cause he’s made of wood”

- Everyone refusing to read any lines of dialogue relating to the marriage / relationship between a child and a grown adult &  Casually just skipping entire sections of dialogue because none of us have the emotional willpower to voice act them.

- Trilo Voice: nipples!

- “WE CANT SAY # GIRL IN THIS COURTROOM!”

- “Bitter love tria” *cuts off mid-sentence due to psychic damage*

- “ I cant believe I dodged a fucking bullet by voicing the clown”

- “How do you respond to this?” *Someone’s bottle making a swish noise as everyone takes a drink* “The Foley of it all”

- Franziska Voice: he’s my poor little meow meow

- “I’m never forgiving this game for west clownadelphia”

-“Have you met my proctologist? Dr. Seymour Butts!!’ “OH MY GOD LARRY’S DAD?!” “Everything is circling back to Moe’s ass...”

- Miles VA: This is why I left the country Franziska VA: IM SORRY FOR EVERYTHING WE DID IN OUR CHILDHOOD PLEASE PICK ME UP IM SCARED

- Mii Sports ‘Nice Shot’ plays every time Franziska whips someone

- Moe: Trauma dumps in a court of law 2 seperate people: Sir this is a wendys

- “I’ll talk as long as you want!” UTIL greek chorus: ~Please Don’t~\

- “my poor little honk honk”

- “Something is toying with this court and it’s not me”  “IT’S THE GODDAMN PUPPET”

- “I don’t know why (im so tired)- actually i do. it’s because we’re playing bigtop”

- Actively replacing the word ‘sweetie’ with any word starting with the letter S

-*long pause of silence* “I think his nipples are the roses”

- “Max has a big... bust?” “We get it Phoenix, you’re a tits man!”

-”(Max’s Bust) Went missing 5 days ago” “HE HAD TOP SURGERY 5 DAYS AGO?!” “Teetus Deleteus”

- *Call dead silent except for the voice actors during the ‘Prosecutor Edgeworth chooses Death’ discussion* *The moment the scene ends* “WHY THE FUCK WAS THIS IN TURNABOUT BIGTOP?!

- “Miles Edgeworth chooses Bed”

-“Ooh ooh ah ah come here my little pogchamp”  Money: Instantly starts attacking Phoenix “ I guess he didn't like being called pogchamp”

- “I want to get to the end so i can get a shirt or pin saying ‘I survived the big top’” (Note: Everyone who made it to the end got a server role called ‘I survived Turnabout Big Top)

-“Moe is Regina’s uncle because he was dating the ringmaster” “The ringmaster is his rebound from his breakup with Manfred” “Terrible work everyone”

- “~Because it’s turnabout big top and life is a Fucking Nightmare~!”

- Entire VC, entering HOUR 6 of this case: “This is the case that never ends! It goes on and on my friends”

-‘Nothing can interrupt me expect death itself” *very quietly in the distance* ‘nice shot’

-Leon: *Bites Bat* “WAS THAT THE BITE OF’ 87?!”

-Phoenix: Deep, deep down I know you want to do good Franziska and Edgeworth: *hissing*

-Acro: *Starts Crying* *in the distance* nice shot\

-Edgeworth: *Appears at the ending scene* Franziska VA: THATS MY BROTHER

“Turnabout Bigtop, The End” Entire VC: *ERUPTS IN CELEBRATORY SCREAMS*

BONUS ROUND: Alternative Names for Turnabout Big Top: Turnabout Please Stop Turnabout Big Top: It Only Gets Worse Turnabout Nice Shot

VIDEO VERSION: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hhpeReADAoM

[fierykitten2]

Trying again with the headcanons (I can't believe I have to restart my progress!)

There will be Animal Crossing (if I sound impatient or rushed or whatever it's because I already wrote this and had to start again because I accidentally deleted the tab) anyway it's time for some headcanons that I will almost certainly end up cringing at when thinking about it in a few days time

--- There is a difference between universes (which correspond to a whole franchise or on rare occasions several franchises in one) and dimensions/sub-universes (which correspond to part of a franchise eg the Wuhu Island that the Wii Sports Club Miis live on is in a different dimension to the one seen in Wii Sports Resort)

--- Falcon, big sisters (especially Agnes, Shari, Renée and Hazel), some jocks, some peppies and maybe the odd smug require an excessive amount of cups of coffee per day in order to stay awake

--- Originally I did this as several points but honestly, they all relate to the same character(s) so I'mma just combine them (that was a GREAT idea). The Mewtwo in Smash somehow knows Teleport and Transform. It gets on Falcon's nerves for using Transform to disguise as him which has on rare occasions led to a physical fight breaking out between them but it usually just leads to Falcon shouting at Mewtwo to stop it because it creeps him out. Ironically, I enjoy the idea of Falcon (often reluctantly) using Mewtwo from Smash to challenge the gyms of a certain region. One thing they can bond over is their (ironic) fear of Isabelle (you know, the dog from Animal Crossing) because she beat them in their first battles against her in Smash due to the fact that she learnt from the Doom Guy. She's still popular with the girls though. Both Smash's Mewtwo and Fox refer to Falcon as "the Cap" (although Mewtwo stole it from Fox and Falcon doesn't really approve of Mewtwo using it). Mewtwo is more of a trickster than is usual for its species. It also doesn't get along well with Sabrina's Alakazam because of Mewtwo's limited psychic ability. Smash's Mewtwo resides in Cerulean Cave and is not the same as Giovanni's Mewtwo or Quest's Mewtwo (nicknamed Cubetwo). Both Smash's Mewtwo and Giovanni's Mewtwo like to nickname others but their nicknames are different (eg Smash's Mewtwo calls Falcon "the Cap" and Sabrina "Sabbie" while Giovanni's Mewtwo calls Falcon "Falkie" and Sabrina "Sabri". Giovanni's Mewtwo also refers to Giovanni as "the Boss" but I haven't got an alternative for Smash's Mewtwo yet). It is unknown if Cubetwo does the same. Smash's Mewtwo (among other limits to its psychic ability) is unable to communicate telepathically without talking out loud (this is shared with non-psychics put into a "telepathic connection"). It also speaks the same way as big sister villagers ("'em", "-in'")

--- Sabrina gets a headache every time people argue but the full extent is unknown

--- Katrina (Animal Crossing) is a psychic

--- Sabrina (somehow) has an inability to multitask

--- Psychics tend to specialise in certain areas. Katrina specialises in seeing the future, Smash's Mewtwo specialises in attack, telekinesis and telepathy, Sabrina specialises in future sight and telepathy and her Alakazam specialises in telepathy, telekinesis, attack and knowledge

--- Most characters are omni but a few exceptions are Falcon (bi), Pico, Marty from Animal Crossing and Sabrina (aroace)

--- Dr Stewart has a crush on Captain Falcon (if you think it's weird because of their 5-year age gap, my parents also have a 5-year age gap and anyway, I headcanon that Falcon's birthday is the next one so that there is a period of time when the age gap is only 4 years) but Falcon is dense (which may have something to do with the fact that he doesn't know how to handle love) so he is unaware but Pico and Samurai Goroh have worked it out and occasionally bully Dr Stewart for it. It's possible his crush has something to do with the fact that Dr Stewart always claims he is better at racing than Falcon

--- Roald, Leonardo, various other jocks and Hilda and Calem from Pokémon also have crushes on Falcon. Roald and Leonardo's crushes are so obsessive that it creeps Falcon out. Calem's is probably the only one that isn't obsessive

--- Rosa has a crush on Hilda and she is both a deredere and a yandere - basically be careful Falcon

--- All jocks that existed in Doubutsu no Mori e+ have played at least one F-Zero game and are therefore aware of Captain Falcon firsthand. Jocks introduced in Wild World and later have probably played a Smash game and know him from that. While all jocks have crushes on Falcon, earlier jocks (the ones who have played at least one F-Zero game) also have crushes on Black Shadow (because of his big muscles)

--- Matt from Wii Sports, Captain Falcon and Fang from Animal Crossing have very similar personalities and likely voices too but I reckon Matt's would be higher-pitched and Fang's would be lower-pitched

--- Sabrina and Katrina (Animal Crossing) have similar personalities

--- Dom gets bullied by Tiansheng for being more similar to a peppy than a jock

--- Calem and Serena put their sunglasses over their eyes when they are sad, embarrassed or getting into Serious Battle Mode (like Yuya from Yu-Gi-Oh! Arc-V)

--- Despite having similar interests to jocks, Audie is obsessed with ribbons

--- Even though I've already mentioned most of these, the following characters have crushes on others that may or may not be requited: Megan (Audie - depending on situation but it is likely she at least knows about it), Dr Stewart (Captain Falcon - he doesn't realise but Pico and Samurai Goroh find it obvious, only requites if told), Rosa (Hilda - doesn't realise, usually doesn't requite), Erika (Misty - probably knows, usually requites) and Leif (Kicks - doesn't know, doesn't requite). Unsurprisingly Leif was very happy when he discovered that Kicks would be joining him on Harv's expanded Island

--- Tom Nook has a harem with Blathers, Isabelle, Sable and Redd

--- Celeste has limited psychic powers (even more limited than Smash's Mewtwo). She specialises in knowledge

I know I'm forgetting something but I can't remember what

Rematched these two today

[canyouhearthelight]

The Miys, Ch. 132

Yes, I know... it’s late again :(

I realized at about 1030a this morning, when I was 30 miles and a minimum of 7 hours from my computer. The guilt was real.

Also, I recently upgraded computers, so I apologize for any editing errors.  Honestly, I don’t have my preferred word processing program on here to check and make sure all my flavor editing is done correctly, so I’m probably going to come back and re-do it when that’s available.  However, I PRIDE myself on the fact that I may post a few hours late, but never the next day! (even though my deadline is technically Tues or Thurs each week?. I dunno)

Quick kudos to @baelpenrose, @the-raven-fae, @anotherusrname, and @charlylimph-blog for being my writing team!

The next morning, I staggered into work very much regretting the onions that I dared to put on the table the night before - I had only gotten a few hours sleep the night before thanks to two rather tall men who shared a tendency to snore like congested warthogs. Fortunately, Vati and Hannah were off today, so I didn’t have to hide the gargantuan yawns every few minutes.

Unfortunately, I wasn’t spared from the sarcastic wit of my assistant, who breezed in the door and simply arched an eyebrow at me. “Hmm, having a coffee day, I see.”

“I can’t look that tired,” I grumbled, shoving my hair out of my face and sulking into my cup - which unfortunately did contain coffee, as predicted.

“You do smell that tired, I am afraid.  And by you, I mean the deplorable muck you are drinking.”

Alistair wasn’t a fan of coffee, obviously, but I was admittedly drinking a really strong cup of it. “The guys had a terrifying amount of onions with dinner last night,” I confessed.

To my satisfaction, he wrinkled his nose. “Delightful.” He also despised onions, more so than he did coffee. “Fortunately, you have quite a sparse schedule this morning.”

Shaking my head, I broke the news to him. “Change of plans. Xio got the list of shelter locations back to me and Tyche yesterday, ironically after we had been complaining about not having them. Pretty sure she was listening in.”

The eyebrow arched again. “Another ‘sensor test’, I assume?”

“Don’t know, don’t care,” I shrugged. “We wanted the list, we got the list. And an ersatz apology in the form of which area can hold how many people, which makes our end much easier.  Bump it up against a map of who is closest to which location, and half our work is done.”

I flicked the list to the emitter on the conference table, and got started. Since Parvati and Hannah were up to their eyeballs in their plotting for the Food Festival, and our job had been significantly lightened in regards to deciding shelter locations, I made the executive decision to take the lead on this project and pull in Tyche for assistance if Alistair and I needed it.  Maybe Arthur if I got desperate for extra help, but working with him and Alistair at the same time was chancy at best - they spent so much time snarking at each other, it could be harder to get work done than if I did it alone sometimes.

Soon, Alistair and I had a map of the Ark, with all shelter locations highlighted and the data from Xiomara’s report overlaid. I had my head down, programming the shelter locations to change color when the capacity limits Xiomara provided were reached, when Alistair noticed something. “Why, pray tell, are the Archives on this map?”

I didn’t even look up. “Probably because it’s the furthest location on the ship from the real-space engines, so it’s the safest place if someone tries to blow those.”

“You are mistaken.” He tapped on the table to get my attention. “The Archives are right on top of the engines, which is why it was available for use: when it was empty, the room was so noisy it was difficult to be in there for more than a handful of minutes.”

Shaking my head, I tapped the ‘front’ of the ship to highlight it. “These are the real-space engines, apparently. When we drop out of relativistic space, these will fire to start slowing us down as we approach Von. These,” I tapped the ‘back’ of the ship, “Are the relativistic engines, which we are using now, which is why that room was so loud when you found it.  According to Noah, for safety purposes, they are housed at opposite ends of the ship.  Also, pretty sure no one is going to try to blow the relativistic engines.  Something quantum physics related that made sense but I would probably explain it wrong.  Big boom, big shrink, no survivors is the gist.”

The disgusted look he gave my explanation was glorious. “So people will be in the Archives, no doubt touching things.”

“They’re books, Alistair. They are meant to be touched and read.” Glancing at the map, I was actually impressed - I never realized how large the Archives were.  They made up nearly an entire deck, albeit the second-smallest on the Ark. “Hang on, someone is already assigned there? Did you do that?”

He scoffed. “I certainly did not, I assumed you had.”

“Nope.  Must have been Xiomara,” I trailed off before tapping the icon indicating an assignment to see who it was.

I started to smile, only to be scared out of my mind by Alistair suddenly shouting. “NO! Absolutely not, I will go tell Councillor Kalloe myself. I - I shall duel her if need be! I refuse to allow this to occur.”

“Alistair, if you duel Xiomara, you’ll probably wind up dead. You know that right?”

“It is only over my dead body that you will be sheltering the Archives. Absolutely not.”

“I’m not going to hurt your precious books, you know that. If anything, I’ll be able to make sure no one else does, either.”

“Not going to hurt the books!?” he nearly shrieked.  I was starting to worry about how hysterical he was getting before he pinched his nose and took a few breaths to calm down. “Madam Reid, I am aware that you will not, through deliberate action or mischance, directly harm a single item in that Archive. I am equally aware that there are certain things that you are distressingly oblivious to, one of which being your own poor luck, if events that take place after being rescued from a global infrastructure collapse can count as poor luck. I shall endeavor to clarify to you why I am so concerned with this.”

Uh oh. He was being very formal.  This was never a good thing.

Before I could object, however, he forged on. “This entire planning exercise is aimed at what, precisely?”

“Designating shelters for non-combatants,” I answered slowly, confused.

“Shelters in the event of what?”

“If we are forcefully boarded in the month after we drop out of relativistic space?”

“Correct.  Which is clearly a bad thing, true?”

“True…”

“And what, remind me, do you have a tendency to do when bad things happen?”

“Plow into the middle of them, which is probably why Xiomara wants me as far from potential combat as possible, so I can’t - “

“Dying, Madam Reid. You have a tendency of dying.”

“Almost dying,” I corrected meekly.  I could unfortunately see where this was going.

“Whenever bad things happen on the Ark, the bad things find you,” he almost hissed. “And I would rather that they not find you in the middle of the only books - potentially the only artifacts, period - that we have from Earth.”

“It may distract them from killing me?” I pointed out.

The glare he gave me rivalled Tyche at her worst.  I probably would have been flattened, had I not built up immunity to far more vicious gazes. “No, this won’t do at all. I must speak to Councillor Kalloe immediately.  And quite likely to Farro.  Let me update the less-endangered Reid that she shall need to arrive early to assist you…”

Any attempt I made to try to dissuade him from the abrupt shortening of his lifespan was ultimately ignored.  As he tried to breeze past my sister, I resorted to grabbing his sleeve and physically stopping him. “Alistair!  You cannot go fight Xiomara to make her put me somewhere else! It’s not worth it!”

He stopped in his tracks, confusion flooding his face. “Somewhere else?  Madam Reid - please unhand me, thank you - whatever gave you that impression?”

“You - the books - dying… I’m so confused. What are you going to fight Xio about, then?”

“I cannot argue the logic of keeping you as far from the engines as possible, nor the logic of placing you as close to something that would deter any invading parties from making rash or reckless decisions.  It is likely quite safer for the ship, in all honesty.”

“Then…?”

He sighed and shook his head. “I am going to speak to Xiomara about removing myself from the non-combatant list and instead being one of the persons assigned to the Archives to defend it from any hostile parties,” he admitted.  “Farro will need to help me brush up on defensive techniques, but I am certain it will be easier to keep the Archives from disaster if I protect it myself.”

“Hey!” Tyche objected. “I’m already assigned to the Archives! She’ll be safe!”

Turning on a heel, he waved a hand over his shoulder dismissively. “You protect your sister from invaders. I shall protect the Archives from her.”

As the door closed behind him, she gave me a baffled look. “Long story,” I sighed. “I’ll explain while we start allocating people.”

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