#non black zealots were definitely normal about him !

[dolokhoded]

simon zealotes you are in my thoughts

[fuckyeaharthuriana]

Cursed - review (spoilers) up to episode 8 (very long post)

I am going to write a non spoilers review and a spoilers review when I finish the show as well, but for now. Here we go.

The review will be divided in:

Plot: alias, who I am supposed to root for? What the hell is that sword? Characters: alias trying to peek around Nimue to get more scenes from the secondary characters, plus... name droppings? Romance: zero chemistry?? tropey endings?

I generally enjoying the show, especially after the first episodes, which were just boringly long and could honestly be avoided.

1. PLOT

The story starts to be a bit more delineated by episode 7, I have to say. When I started it, I was extremely confused about who I was supposed to root for, what was happening, why all the arthurian names where mixed up. 

First of all, let me say that the show looked very pretty. A part from the hideous transitions (animated transitions), the way the show uses colors was absolutely lovely. 

a) The plot is this: Someone made a magic Sword (let’s call it Sword) which was able to give very good fighting abilities (and magic) to whoever was using it. Merlin came to use it, at some point, but the Sword ended up fusing with him, corrupting him into a need for revenge. He helps raise kings with the use of his sword, until the Sword consumes all his power and almost kills him.

He is saved by a Sky Fay woman who takes the sword out of his body and hides it, trying to save Merlin from his dark power. They fall in love and are together, until Merlin leaves, angrily, when he finds out that the woman has “destroyed” the Sword (but she has just hidden it). She later marries a guy, and has Nimue, who is actually Merlin’s daughter.

The story starts when the Red Paladins attack Nimue’s village and Nimue’s mother asks her to bring the Sword to Merlin. During her journey he encounters Arthur, who is a thief, and Arthur’s sister, a nun called Morgana who actually works with the Fey people, trying to save them.

The plot picks up once we are around episode 6 and 7, and Nimue is finally back with the hidden Fey, alongside Arthur and Morgana, and they decide that they will keep the sword and fight against the Red Paladins.

b) This is the overall plot. The beginning of the show is extremely slow. The show is heavy handed in his need to show us how oppressed and suffering Nimue is. She is shamed by her own people for being “demonic”, she is discriminated by humans (even if she is one of the fey who has zero fey features), she is attacked by both. When the Red Paladins destroyed her village... I was confused, because we didn’t really see any positive feelings Nimue had for her home (she hated everyone, she was discriminated, she was trying to leave). Also, somehow everyone could tell she is Fey? I was confused by how badly she was able to hide, her who looks like a normal human and could have easily cut her hair or something.

Her meeting with Arthur is also... strange. He is introduced as a love interest, we get bits of his story (thrown away from his family, his father has been killed, seeking honor) with the show, he is a thief and his “attachment” to the plot could have been a bit more... consistent. He helps Nimue, bringing her to Morgana, and conveniently Morgana is working to help the Fey and working for an underground smuggling operation. I think I would have enjoyed it much more if Arthur had been more involved in Morgana’s smuggling operations.

The other side of the plot revolves around Merlin or the Vikings (Pym). He is Uther’s advisor, and Uther is a shitty king. He is just there to... give Merlin something to do? I think the show would have worked well without him.

c) Uther and Pym are the comic reliefs of this show. Uther is shown as having no spine, so I am not sure why he was there. He had no interest in the Red Paladins, or the kingdom, he just wanted the Sword because apparently that gives power to the king? At the same time, we have Pym (Nimue’s friend, thought dead in the attack), who ends up as a healer for a raider ship. Honestly, the people in this show were so horrible that I definitely rooted for Pym’s Vikings. I am not sure if the show wanted me to root for the fae or the vikings, but I definitely wished for the vikings to keep raiding.

Now, for the main plot point that confused me:

d) The Fae and the Red Paladins

I was very confused about why the fae were chased and hunted. The world has Christianity, the Pope and the Church but is basically in a fantasy land (but also it has the Ninth lost legion and the Roman Empire, but the gods are not from anything I could recognize). We are supposed to believe that there is an old ancient religion, and that the fae follow.... Hidden gods? shadows? they have power related to the land? But do they? None of them seemed to have any powers, only Nimue had magic. The show seems to imply that they do, but we only see Nimue using her powers, while the fae is powerless against the Paladins. So... I suppose the Paladins attack them just because they look different? Or because they follow another religion? 

I wish there had been a bit extra information about why the Red Paladins are so anti-fae. Something maybe related to the sword, like the Sword murdered a bunch of people and it was made by people following this specific religion? 

How powerful are they? Why do they have a fortress? Are they getting taxes from the kingdom, is that why they have the “money from the Beggars Land”. Furthermore, in episode 8, why don’t the Red Paladins fight Nimue? Why leave her fight one on one? There has not been enough time for the reputation to build yet, and we have not seen her reputation building (I take as example Black Sails, and the way John Silver’s reputation was built there). The conquest of the Red Paladins in episode 8 was a bit... too easy. All these religious zealots suddenly are like nope, we surrender. The politics were generally quite confusing, I was never sure where the characters were because they could fast travel to any point at any time.

e) The Sword

I have to say that I really enjoyed the idea of the Sword as something that drains (took Merlin’s power) and corrupts. I definitely want to see what happens to Nimue after using it, and how Arthur will end up with it, as king.

f) Too much gore

TOO

MUCH

GORE

There is no point in it. The Red Paladins are shown to mutilate and torture and kill more than once. It is not needed. We need to see it once, then... just cut away. The guy who is following Merlin to kill him? He is immediately shown torturing a poor person buried alive. There is no point for the majority of these gore scenes.

g) Characters just ends up at the right place at the right time

There is no map or order. We NEVER know where character are. They can instantly transport themselves to any place. They are hidden in the forest and surrounded? It’s okay, they can immediately teleport an army to the Red Paladins’ castle.

Nimue is in the caves, hidden? No worries, she can immediately reach Arthur who is in another place, when she needs to.

Gawain is wandering the forest? The Weeping Monk is right there!

h) If you’re a secondary character you die

Unless you have an important arthurian name (and unless you are Kaze), then the character is dead. Ambushes will happen, the main characters will always survive.

2. CHARACTERS

Name dropping

I want to start with something that really annoyed me because of the over use. The name dropping.

The show did this at least four times, if not more. A character would be introduced with a name (ex. here is the Green Knight!) and then the character or the narration would rectify it by giving us a new name (”He is Gawain!”), with a long pause that leaves us (the audience) the time to GASP IN SHOCK BECAUSE “I KNOW THAT NAME”.

It just seemed.... too much, after the first time.

Gawain

Alright, let me start with Gawain because he literally came out of nowhere. It almost felt like the show introduced him at the beginning (Gawain is supposed to be Nimue’s dearest friend) but then they edited out the scenes so when we meet Gawain we are supposed to be shocked by we are not. 

A part from this, he really grew on me. He is the Green Knight, the hero of the hidden fae, and he hates humans (somehow all the main fae, Nimue and Gawain, look like humans). His character arc is well done, because he learns to trust Arthur and that is basically his character growth. 

Morgana

HANDS ON, BEST CHARACTER EVER. Morgana’s journey was amazing, also because of what we know of her arthurian character. She starts in a convent, using the family name Igraine, and having Celia as her lover.

I wasn’t too impressed by the fact that the show seemed to use her being wlw as a way to show how progressive and different Nimue is. Still, at least we have our first tv wlw Morgana! She fights for the fae and helps them escape, which shows her sense of justice, even if it is never really explained why she would do this, or even how she started to relate to the fae.

Still, she was soon set to the path of her personal pain when she lost Celia (I’ll talk more about them down in relationships), and the show is never cruel to her pain. We see that she wants revenge (when she writes the letter! Amazing! Stunning!) AND justice most of all, but she accepts the deal with the demon when she sees Celia again, when she is offered something she really desires. Love THIS FOR HER. I am sure her journey will be more and more interesting by episode.

Nimue

I wasn’t too impressed with Nimue. She feels like a character who needs to be there to forward the plot, but I was also sad when the scene moved from other characters to return to her. I understand the need for her character, but I was not too invested in her character arc? I don’t want to sound cruel, I understand the need for her character development and how she had to discover herself and her destiny, but it was all very guidebook and very expected.

At episode 8, Nimue becomes queen of the Fae and conquers the Red Paladins and allies with the Red Spear? This... happens so fast. Nothing had really happened before this point, no plan, no showing us how the Paladins were in one place only... there is really no sense in it. It was just so fast, as if the show didn’t want to spend too much time investing in grand battles or showing us things. 

Pym and the Red Spear

Pym is the comic relief of the show. She miraculously escape the massacre and ends up with the Red Spear and her raiding ship. Honestly, they were the best characters. I wish they had had more screen, more than comedic relief. They just conveniently are at the right spot at the right moment (somehow the Red Paladins don’t kill them? After normally slaughtering everyone they find, they are just captured) and thus are thrown back in Nimue’s main plot line, but I am afraid that because of this they will just disappear from the show??

Arthur

Arthur is a mixed bag for me. I really enjoyed how his character arc revolved around honor. He felt like he lost honor and had to reclaim it. But when he steals the Sword we never see him regretting it, which was disappointing, as that would have been part of his arc. Also, he somehow ends up working with the fae but he never shows any emotional investment in justice because the show is too occupied to show us how Arthur and Nimue are falling in love.

I think he shines the most in the episodes where he works with Gawain. We see how he is smart, strategic, and a good fighter, but also able to lead (he saves Gawain with a sacrifice) even when surrounded by people who distrusts him. I truly enjoyed it.

I think his character loses when he is in the same scenes with Nimue.

Kaze

KAZE WAS SUPPOSED to be Nimue’s right hand, giving her advice. And her character is shown to have both advice for Nimue but also being wiser than her. Nimue needs her counsel. Still, when Nimue actually takes the throne, Kaze is not really seen counselling her, as the show needs to immediately pass to the next plot point, and only shows us Nimue and Arthur.

Merlin

Merlin’s plot started strong and then... sort of got lost. He starts being Uther’s witty advisor. He doesn’t really care about Uther, but wants to use his need for the Sword to also get the Sword for himself (to get his magic back?). He doesn’t have magic anymore, and his character arc shows us how he goes from being selfish (he wants the Sword to get his magic back) to selfless when he finds out Nimue is his daughter. 

Still, many parts of his plot were...??? He steals fire from the Beggar King (supposedly to destroy the Sword) and this leads to the Fisherman being hired to kill him? But this whole Fisherman subplot was a bit out of nowhere. 

He allies with the Vikings (sorry, I forget the name of the king) because their king also wants the Sword... and against Uther... but Uther is literally doing nothing worthy and he could easily manipulate Uther, but ends up losing any upper hand against the Viking king? What was the point of all that?

3. .Romance? Relationships?

Nimue and Arthur? Nope. Their relationship just happens. I have nothing to say about it, a part from the fact that I always found Nimue and Arthur more interesting when they were interacting with other characters because those were the moments where we got characterizations. Arthur with Gawain? We see Arthur’s ability to lead, and the way he reclaims his honor. Nimue with Kaze? We see her insecurities and her hope for the fae.

DOF AND PYM? Yes please. They were just so cute, and Dof’s death was useless.

Morgana and Celia? Yes? But here we are again with the “buried gay” trope, because we cannot have a happy wlw. I understand that she is Morgana and she is not supposed to be happy, so I am not too annoyed at it, especially if Morgana’s love for Celia is used to give conflict to Morgana.

[welcometothebookreport]

In 2020, I read 40 books (with maybe a few more to be added after I post this) after discovering my love of reading all over again. I am not a very hard reader to please, so it will be rare for me to rate a book with a low score, so I doubt you’ll ever see any criticism from me. So, here we go!

A few things before I start: There are three series in this list (but technically only two, because I’ve only read Serpent & Dove so far) but I’ve limited myself to no repeat authors. That must have been the hardest part for me. Since Jessi went the extra mile and ranked them in order, I’ve decided to make myself suffer the same. And while most of these were not published in 2020, they were read in 2020.

I am (sometimes) a picky reader, but any book that is on this list, I have loved. I chose not to rate them because honestly, they would have all been high. I give ratings easily, and try not to pick things apart even for books I truly did not like.

Please keep in mind that I do my best to add trigger warnings, but you should always check for certain triggers before reading. Triggers vary for everyone.

10. Saint Anything by Sarah Dessen

Warnings: There’s a male character that’s a creep and you’ll spot him as soon as you crack this one open. This tale deals with Peyton being sentenced to prison, and their mother practically glossing over what he’s done by victim blaming.

I have read Dessen’s books since I was 13 and I truly still enjoy her stories as much as I did then. While this was a re-read for me, it’s a tie for my favorite book of hers. It’s tied with Along For the Ride.

Sydney is left in the aftermath after her older brother, Peyton, is sentenced to prison after a drunk driving accident that paralyzes a boy. Formerly in his shadow, Sydney struggles to discover what it is she wants, and how she wants to be seen as her own mother seems to gloss right over her. It’s a YA read that always feels like more than the romance that originally interested me.

9.  Serpent & Dove by Shelby Mahurin

Warnings: Misogyny. The church and religion plays an extremely heavy part of this plot, which was hard for me to get into. It’s clear that some characters do not value women in their actions and words toward Lou. It made me uncomfortable in spots because I just wanted to get past it, but I plan to read this one again since I know that it won’t bother me this time! Still, there is: violence in parts, religious zealots (in case that’s something that makes you uncomfortable like it did me), derogatory slurs toward women, and again, misogyny.

I finished this one two days ago, and I sincerely cannot wait to dig into the sequel. Lou is a witty, snappy character that was such a breath of fresh air from the normal. You usually see the male lead that’s a bit crude, a bit quick to pull the trigger, and the one that’s harder to crack. Is that what happened here? Absolutely fucking not. Shelby Mahurin took something I loved, enemies to lovers, and kicked its ass. Forced marriage? UM YES. A witch and a witch-hunter? Mortal enemies? Characters that can never possibly love each other? DONE DONE DONE.

It’s hilarious in parts. Serious when it needs to be. A bit spicy too, while not a lot, which I certainly appreciate. Reid’s character development is a wonder to watch, at least for me, and by the end of the book, I am so in love with him that I don’t know what to do with myself. I have so many annotations for this novel.

8. The Shadows Between Us by Tricia Levenseller

Warnings: There’s a fair bout of murder. Women are expected not to take lovers before marriage while men are not held to the same standard. Gross. Allessandra is continually underestimated so let me say: let the women do the work.

It’s called the Slytherin romance we’ve been waiting for, and I agree. While this is a shorter read, and a standalone, I was pleased with it. Both characters are incredibly ambitious, but it’s Allessandra that steals the show. The plan? To enter the palace, woo the king, and then kill him in order to take his kingdom. She’s wicked in all the ways I love.

I loved this book, and each page, but this was the line that will make me return to it: “I’m not a trollop,” I announce to the empty room. “I’m a sexually empowered woman, and there’s nothing wrong with that.”

The Folk of the Air Series by Holly Black

Warnings: Aside from murder, there’s nothing that stands out to me as a trigger.

A series! The first! There’s something interesting about this series for me, and it’s that I didn’t fall in love altogether, all at once. It was gradual, like wading into water until it went right over my head. By the final fourth of The Cruel Prince, I was fully invested in this world and I absolutely needed to know how Jude and Cardan would become, well, Jude and Cardan.

As a YA series, I was not expecting the sheer amount of mystery, political intrigue, and plot twists that came with this series. However, I never knew what was going to happen, and if I did guess what was coming, Black had at least two more twists to send me for a loop. The Queen of Nothing was likely my favorite book of the series, with The Wicked King as a close second.

6. Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston

Warnings:  Discussion of attempted non-con assault, forced disclosure of sexuality

I laughed until my eyes watered and I nearly cried in this book. Delightfully funny, and snappy, RW&B delivers on everything I didn’t know that I needed. I had never read a book where LGBTQ was represented in such a positive light. As someone raised in a more conservative household, I’ve known my own sexual orientation for a long time, but this book made me feel like I could relax in my skin because this story was stunning.

Alex and Henry left me with so much hope that it’s impossible to ever put the lid back on. I’m so happy I read this.

(oh, god, we’re in the final five.)

5. The Caraval Series by Stephanie Garber

Warnings: Physical and emotional child abuse.

I could dedicate multiple posts to this series. Maybe I still will. While this is at number five, it’s my favorite series I’ve ever read. If I could only have one series to read for the rest of my life, I would choose this one. Hands down. Full stop. These characters live in my head constantly and I would give an obscene amount of things to read it all over again for the first time. I actually read this with two of my closest friends in our many book club, and we all loved it.

Doused in magic, this world is unveiled to us with excellent descriptions. Truly, Garber owned my heart within a few chapters. Scarlett is the elder sister, Tella the younger, and if you don’t love Tella by the end of Caraval, I promise you will. I know because I was skeptical, but here I am. I’ve said it to my friends, but Scarlett is the one who holds my hair while I have a hangover. Tella is the one that helps me start the bar fight.

With non-stop turns, and magic, everything comes to life on these pages. And the romance, the romance. Please, please give me my great love in this style. It’s not too much to ask for, is it?

4. Letters to the Lost by Brigid Kemmerer

Warnings:  loss of sibling, loss of parent, alcoholism, mention of infidelity, mentions of previous physical and emotional child abuse.

Mae sent this recommendation to me, and I devoured all of Kemmer’s books post-haste. Declan and Juliet fall in love without knowing who the other is, while also not liking the real version of their penpal. Juliet has lost her mother, and she’s treading water, but not well. Declan has suffered in the years that follow a family tragedy, and he’s not adapting to life with his new step-father.

But he opens with CemetaryGirl (Juliet) and it’s raw in the best of ways, and the openness between them that eventually moves from their bubble to reality is one of the most pleasing things to read. I’ve read it twice this year. I will read it again next year too.

I also read this twice this year and will for sure be reading it again in 2021.

3. The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern

Warnings: Child abuse.

This was another novel that I fell in love with as I went, and that’s definitely because of the non-linear narrative. It was a little confusing, but I’m going to read it again someday since I know everything now! I read this to follow-up to Caraval with my book club pals, and it’s just what I needed to leave Caraval behind. Marco and Celia are incredible and I absolutely believe that the ending of this novel is one of the best endings I’ve ever read.

My book club has not finished this book entirely this so I’m not sharing any spoilers, but I would like to share one of my favorite quotes. “What did you wish for?” “I wished for her.”

2. Next Year in Havana by Chanel Cleeton

Warnings: Cuba is in the middle of a revolution, and it’s tense in parts. There are some bittersweet elements and I think the parts of the ending are like the punch in the gut you need in order to wake you up and remember to live.

This was my first read once I really dug back into this hobby in August. It was picked by Reese Witherspoon for her book club, and she always picks good books. This is a dual timeline romance, and mystery. It’s an absolute stunner of a book. It’s a dear favorite to me now. I’ve never been to Cubs, or heard stories, but Cleeton manages to make you feel like you’re right there feeling saltwater spray across your face.

The romance made me feel breathless, but truly it’s the strong familial ties that make this such a beautiful gem. It leaves you with hope even in the dark and with love in the absence of it. I could scream about this book for the rest of my life, which I absolutely intend to do.

Favorite line? “You’re going to be difficult to walk away from, aren’t you?” “I hope so.”

1 In A Holidaze by Christina Lauren

Warnings? There are none that strike me. This is a lighthearted read that pulls at the heartstrings, but it’s by no means short on the laughs. And, I’m sorry for the long wall of text below.

In A Holidaze is the story of a woman stuck in her ways of never going after what she truly wants until a stray wish lands her in a time loop over the holidays. It's only after repeating the same day a few times that she quite literally says "fuck this," and starts living for HER. I really expected this to just be a Hallmark kind of read, but it was SO MUCH MORE. You should read it, even if it's after the holidays.

It's witty, and heart-wrenching, and it's just everything I didn't know I needed. Mae is snarky, and brave when she figures out that there is nothing stopping her, and the romance is - GODDAMN. Andrew. I need an Andrew and a fan.

It's not quite a love triangle, which was what I expected and I was so pleasantly surprised. I have grinned like a goddamn fool all day. I have giggled all day in front of customers, and my co-workers. I have nearly CRIED in my bedroom when my heart fell out of my ass and landed somewhere near my ankles, because hello, it's gonna get you.

This is going on my yearly re-read list for the holidays.

In the two days since I’ve finished, I’ve convinced my two friends in book club to read it, convinced Jessi to order it from Book of the Month Club, convinced another friend to read it, and bought it for Mae on Christmas day because her library had a six month hold and that was simply unacceptable.