#nobody gets context for this one except my partner who I vented to about it earlier cause the post is genuinely a net positive in the world

[circe-diana]

There is no feeling in the world quite like getting unreasonably and inexplicably angry at the most benign Tumblr post and then panicking at every new tumblr notification for the rest of the night because your brain assumes it's people calling you out for these feelings that you have not expressed online in any way.

[boy-porridge-vent]

By the way, as happy as I am in my new relationship, as good as things have been, there’s a person out there that tried to ruin it for me because she used to be my friend, she used to be close to my boyfriend, so the fact that we got together made her beyond pissed off

It’s weird because.... she’s an ex girlfriend of mine. SHE broke up with me THREE (3) times in the span of 5 months, SHE left me for another guy because she became infatuated with them TWICE, then on our 3rd breakup she left me and started actually dating another guy less than 2 days after she supposedly broke up with me, which I had NO IDEA about. I had NO CLUE we broke up the 3rd time until she told me she was dating somebody else.

For context, I told her to stop talking to me because everytime she did it brought back all my emotions and feelings for her, and it led to a horrible chain of self harm urges, nightmares, and just bad stuff. Very bad. Yet here, she messaged me saying she missed me, that SHE’S hurt, that she wants me to feel better... yet now as of this current date (12/26/2019) I DO feel better and Ive moved on, but she’s pissed about it because Im dating someone she used to be close with.

SHE said she wanted me to feel better, and now that I do, she’s upset at me for it. What the fuck am I supposed to do about that?? Bruhhh

She got mad that my friend was looking out for me, and that who she dates is nobody’s business....

Ive told you all about this already, Ive vented and complained and cried over her for months on this account, you already know all this. And she even told me that she hoped I would move on and get over her (fyi she said this in the nicest way possible with good intentions)... so when I FINALLY get over her and move on, when I remove her from my life completely and date somebody new that I truly do love & enjoy talking to, she freaks the fuck out on me!

Well... not on ME exactly, but... you get the idea. Again, like I said above, she thought it was stupid that my friend was getting into her business when it came to her relationship, yet.... she chick, that broke up with me 3 times and was being hella shady behind my back.... decided to message MY boyfriend, telling him he’s an asshole, he needs to fuck off, and that he betrayed her???? 

She also apparently messaged him a week prior, getting mad at him for simply talking to me, and told him flat out “Don’t date Adam” (that’s me, Im Adam). And when we inevitably ended up dating, she found out after stalking my instagram, and messaged him using all kinds of insults and rude remarks that he didnt deserve. And for what reason? Because he got romantic feelings for me? Something he couldnt help? Just as she had supposedly caught for her new boyfriend that she left me for? As she had done for the handful of other guys she broke up with me for back in March and April?

Even when she broke up with me over and over because she found other people she saw as being better than me, I never said ANYTHING. I suffered in silence because I didnt want to ruin our friendship. I didn’t message the people she crushed on, calling them shitty people. Hell, I didn’t even message her current boyfriend after she left me for him. As soon as she told me they were dating DAYS after we broke up, I just left. Didnt give her shit for it, didnt give her boyfriend shit because he really has nothing to do with all this, he’s very unknowing of the situation.

But still. I didnt do SHIT to her. SHE wronged me. She hurt me beyond what I could have ever imagined, yet she thought it was necessary to message my partner and insult him when MY RELATIONSHIP was NONE of HER BUSINESS!!!! Do you see what Im getting at here??? He and I hadn’t been dating for 2 days yet when she found out and went off on him. It’s really pathetic, honestly, that she would try to stoop that low and make him feel that shitty for something she has no business in knowing.

She posted this to her PUBLIC insta, the message being directed toward me.

When she says “You cant leave me one thing?” she’s implying that I’ve taken her friends away from her, which I have not done. I never told anybody to stop being her friend. My friends either already didnt like her, or they stopped being close to her/dropped her as a friend too because she made them uncomfortable or upset. That’s out of my control, I cant force people to be her friend, and I cant force them to NOT be her friend. But she thinks it’s all my fault??? And my new boyfriend was previously her friend, theyve known each other for a long while, 2 years I think? So now they we’re dating, she thinks I took him away from her.... even he added me on Snap first... snapped me first.... followed me on Insta first.... followed my Twitter first.... told me he liked me first.... he initiated everything first! But she thinks I somehow stalked through her online friends and just decided to message him one day and take him away so I could have a larger ego or something?? Why would I do that? It’s ridiculous! She thinks Im out to take everyone away from her or something when Ive been pretty silent about how Ive felt (except for my venting on this account, of course).

It’s all petty bullshit and she needs to get over herself.

Im finally happy with myself and my life, Ive been eating more normally, havent self harmed... hell, my boyfriend is flying down here from Iceland to visit me for my birthday soon! I love this dude more than anything and I couldnt be happier, but Ive kept it down-low because I dont want to broadcast everything we do to the world... yet my ex gets mad because she’s digging through MY business that she shouldnt be concerned with, the same way how she said people shouldnt be concerned with HER relationship business.... pathetic hypocrisy.

Hopefully she gets over herself soon and moves on from MY life, just as I had to force myself to do after months of silence and pure fucking agony from her not being able to decide what she wanted from me. 

I just worry though... when he flies down here to visit me, I worry she’ll try to shove her way into all this again and try to make my boyfriend visit her, or she’ll try to hangout with us, and if she’s denied that, then she might flip out and make it a big ordeal. I really don’t want that stress on my back for an entire week during my birthday. But I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.