#no decision is made despite all that rambling lmfao

[ofmdee]

gifs on twitter 🔞

[youredreamingofroo]

Having finished this rewatch, there's something I wanna point out that I've noticed. (to my mutuals who dgaf about The Passenger, ignore this 🥰🥰 LMFAO)

(I actually noticed on earlier watches but didnt take note of this til now) At the end, when Randy finally leaves the bathroom after deciding to call 911 (which wasnt pushed onto him by Benson or in reply to Benson), he flexes his hand instead of clenches them like he normally would, which kind of signifies relief, and I think that's such a good detail to add, cuz although this decision was incredibly stressful to make and although it looked like and sounded like he didnt want to necessarily get Benson in trouble (avoiding saying He's dangerous ["he might... he- he’s not necessarily gonna hurt anyone,"] and that he could hurt someone), Randy felt relieved, relieved to make a decision, relieved to prevent anyone else from getting hurt or killed, but mostly, relieved to stop Benson (albeit possibly unaware of how far "Stop" can and will go), and He didn't have to look at Benson for an answer, he didnt have to look at Benson to make the call on whether he should dial 911 or not (even then, Benson probably would've just shrugged and made it obvious that it's not his call, it's Randy's choice), he spoke up to Benson about needing to use the bathroom so that he could call the police, he decided to do this, when he could've just stayed silent and continued on as Benson's hostage, he stood up for himself and others, which is what Benson has been insinuating and telling him this entire time, perhaps it's not exactly the decision Benson was hoping he'd make, but he did it- call back to when they're in Benson's house, he decided to get the phone for Ma, but was punished for it, and Benson says "...there’s certain decisions that are bad decisions...-...and they put me in a difficult position. They put me in a bind. Because it forces me to hurt you, when what I really want to do is help you." Now fast forward, where Randy takes Ms. Beard's phone, he uses it to call 911, and (keep with me here) Benson is put into a bind not for the same reason, but because he doesnt believe that Randy could've done it, he is binded into this idea that anyone but Randy could've done it (despite the fact that Randy was in the bathroom and gone long enough to make that call), being stuck like this, he gets angry, he gets stuck in a blind rage, where he accuses Ms. Beard, and in that blind rage, he completely voids Randy out, his blindness forces him to ignore Randy's step infront of Ms. Beard and ignore Randy's attempt to confess, he shoots him, he's """forced""" to hurt randy, and he panics, all he's wanted to do is help Randy, and his own rage and blindness forced him into hurting Randy. Does that make sense?? I kinda of started to ramble >:T I'm just so hyperfixated on this one detail cuz there's so much about it in the few frames it occurs.

[repo-net]

Thank you so much for responding to my ask! I appreciate you taking time out of your day to take up my request, I wish you have a great April ahead of you!

You have a pretty unique story; I don't think I've ever heard of anyone coming across the Danganronpa manga before playing the games or watching the anime as their first experience, so I can definitively say that you took a pretty unusual route getting there, ahah. Funnily enough, I think my way of finding Danganronpa is a one-of-a-kind case on it's own, and similarly; it involved Nagisa and painting him early on in a way that made me like him more when I finally got around to going through UDG's game properly.

I won't get into the details, but it was the infamous Nagisa-Monaca scene from Chapter 4 (You'll know what this is.) popping up in my feed on YouTube one day, and I clicked it out of curiosity because my brain saw their faces and went "Wait, is that Nagisa (Shiota from Assassination Classroom) and Kayano? (also from Assassination Classroom)". And then the moment plays, I recognize Nagito from all the memes, and then I scroll down the comments, find out that the game is DR's spinoff (and to my shock, that Nagisa was a guy lmfao) and I decide from then on I'll check out the main games starting from 1 and see if I like it. And the rest is history.

I think the manga does a nice job portraying Nagisa's character, but my issue with it is that you really lack a lot of the big turning points in his arc that really hammer home his true role as a pawn for Monaca's game. His scene in Chapter 2 where he questions the validity in Masaru's 'death' was shortened and lacks the substance the game version has, the already aforementioned infamous scene with Monaca and his boss fight at the end in the factory where he confronts the trio of adults where the Big Bang Monokuma was located don't even exist.

Nagisa's story in the manga ended with him being called a traitor by Nagito and him running away while swearing. Kind of... underwhelming. But I can't rag on the manga too much, there's far too many good slides of him in there that I still adore it anyways. Here's a few more of my favorites.

You have really sweet headcanons for his future self too, and a spot-on description of his character. I've always enjoyed your stories with him involved, because your portrayal of him as a man who still struggles with his perfectionist tendencies but has learned to let the people close to him help him relax more. Even if he has his disagreements with them, Nagisa genuinely treasures all the people who've managed to get past his cold exterior and would do anything to keep them safe. Despite all his faults and every horrible thing he's had to witness and do, you can't rag on his honesty no matter what situation he comes across.

It hurts seeing him constantly take an L through UDG because you can obviously tell he's just trying his best and just wants to get to his goal of a paradise where children can live safely, away from the fear of adults. But he's so torn. Just unable to pick a side decisively and he ends up paying the price for it at the end. I think his arc could've been ended better than it did in UDG or DR3, but that's a different ballpark and I'm already rambling quite a lot.

All these thoughts of Nagisa as a dad who is incredibly prideful of his kids and wants to see them flourish without any conditions is just- ugh, it's beautiful. I really do think the most proper closure someone who's gone through as much as Nagisa has is for him to have a family that he raises and loves properly, because I think to him, the opportunity to finally make up for the mistakes his parents made and for him to conclusively atone for everything he's done in his life.

I really adore how one of your headcanons is Nagisa styling his daughter's hair similar to his, that's so adorable. I'd imagine he isn't really proud or amused by his own hair since he finds it silly, but I believe he'd take comfort knowing his own kid wants to look like him.

Once again, thank you for taking the time to cover my ask! I'll leave you with a couple more of my favorite shots of Nagisa - this time from the anthology.

Hello yello, it's me again, hope you're having a wonderful day so far! If it's not a bother, could I get a response from you about Nagisa in the numbers ask game?

10 and 23 since those are his birthday numbers. If it's no problem, I'd love to hear about 2 as well. Thanks again for everything you've written and done!

Hi friend! Aww you're so sweet. 🥰 I really should be thanking you for all the great Nagisa and Warriors of Hope content and for your ask. I would absolutely love to talk about my son, Nagisa! 💙 (I love that you picked his birthday numbers too! That's great!) Thank you so much for the ask, and I hope you're having a wonderful day as well. Take care and cheers!!😊

I'm including this picture from aminoapps and this gif from getyarn just because I can.

Questions from this Character Ask Game

Answers and Headcanons are below the cut. (Warnings: Spoilers for UDG and vague discussion of childhood trauma & abuse)

2. When I think I truly started to like them (or dislike them, if you've sent me a character I don't like)

This is kind of a complicated answer because as my sister would say I "did not experience Danganronpa like a normal person" 😂 so I apologise in advance for the ramblings. My younger sister was super into Danganronpa especially Ultra Despair Girls and when she told me about it (and suggested I play UDG), she actually told me a little about Nagisa and that she thought I would really like his character. (A/N: I have quite the collection of favourite characters who are high-strung, overachieving perfectionists). I usually don't play a lot of video games, but I was curious so I decided to compromise and read the manga for UDG (which definitely gave me a different perspective on things than my sister, I think, because there were some changes...but that's another story). Since I kind of went into the story with more information (from my sister) and the feeling I would probably end up liking his character, I think I had a more positive view of Nagisa much earlier on than I would have otherwise.

The big moment I started really liking him though was probably when he swooped in to protect Kotoko which was a much bigger and more dramatic thing in the manga than in the game. [A/N: There was definitely a bit of confusion there because my sister was really perplexed by why in my mind Nagisa and Kotoko were such close friends whereas in my sister's mind (from the game) she was much closer friends with Masaru. Unfortunately, there wasn't a lot of Masaru in the manga so I didn't really start to like him nearly as much until I played the game, but I digress...] Anyway... I'll include some of the frames just for reference.

So yes, Nagisa gets his heroic moment where he protects his friend and then he tries to help Komaru and Toko out of the city. If that isn't enough, he then starts to go into his backstory, and everything just clicks that he really is such a good kid at heart, he's just been corrupted and manipulated due to Junko (and Monaca) exploiting his trauma and taking advantage of the fact he was broken, vulnerable, and starving for love. He suddenly becomes a very tragic character, and I just wanted to adopt and protect him. My poor boy. He's been my son ever since.

And I will say it was such a fun perspective to go into the UDG game already liking his character because it was so exciting any time he and the other little hope warriors showed up. My sister was making fun of me (in good fun) when we were playing because I was very afraid cautious of the Monokumas (A/N: I'm not usually a fan of shoot 'em up games) and wouldn't ever run (because you can't aim the weapon & run at the same time), so I was really just constantly shuffling around slowly, hiding behind things, and literally jumping during the jump scares. (A little pathetic, sure, but I was trying to survive here). But then we get to Chapter 4 when the objective is protecting Nagisa, and it completely cured me of my animatronic-robot-bear-phobia. I went full "Mama Bear" mode (no pun intended) running around destroying those things left and right like "Not My Son!!" My sister teases me about it to this day and says, "I'm so glad you finally learned how to run." 😂 Good times.

10. Describe the character in one sentence

This one is a bit difficult for me since I tend to be really wordy and also because I'm imagining Nagisa trying to describe himself in one sentence and I really don't know if he'd be able to do it--he'd have to fight that tendency to write a whole dissertation with subheadings and a table of contents. 😅 I'm going to have to fight that too, but I'll try my best...

Nagisa is wise beyond his years and an old-soul: highly intelligent, responsible, and conscientious, and though he can be perfectionistic, overachieving, and hard on himself and is burdened with deep internal pain from a childhood of abuse, he cares deeply for his friends and genuinely wants to make the world better so that other children don't have to suffer in the way that he did (he is misguided on this point, but his culpability is diminished given that he was a severely traumatized child who was taken advantage of and manipulated into criminal activity when he was vulnerable and he feels genuine guilt and remorse for what he did).

[A very long sentence 😅]

23. Future headcanon

I really want good things for Nagisa in the future and would love to see him reach a healthy, more well-adjusted place when he grows up. I know it's basically the apocalypse, but I really like to think that he and the other Warriors of Hope do eventually get the therapy they so desperately need and actually get to heal after all of the horrible and traumatic things they've all been through. In terms of more specific headcanons here are a few:

When they are all young professionals/working adults, Nagisa, Jataro, and Masaru are roommates which is often a bit of a comical arrangement since they are really so vastly different as people despite sharing a living space. Nagisa can be a little intense when it comes to keeping the apartment clean and organized, for instance. (To be fair, Masaru and Jataro are both kind of slobs if left to their own devices). However, he wants things to be fair and for everyone to do their part so he devises a chore chart to track who is supposed to clean what that week. Jataro and (especially) Masaru tend to act kind of like big kids, so Nagisa resorts to having incentives (like paying to get them ice cream) if they do all their chores. [Bonus: Masaru often complains to Kotoko about the chore chart, and she thinks it's kind of ridiculous à la 'You're a grown man--why don't you just buy your own ice cream?' but Masaru insists it tastes better when someone else is paying for it. 😂]

Nagisa eventually earns a Ph.D and works for Future Foundation. (As much as his friends like to teasingly refer to him as "Dr. Nagisa," it actually takes a while for them to all adjust to other people calling him "Dr. Shingetsu" all the time). Nagisa takes a lot of pride in his work developing and implementing air filtration systems worldwide. He is always very excited and enthusiastic whenever he talks about it, but his work is so complicated that none of his friends are entirely certain what it is he does exactly. He quickly rises through the ranks at Future Foundation until he works under the direct supervision of Togami who thinks he's very a conscientious employee and trusts him enough to put him in charge of several important projects. Since Nagisa still struggles with his perfectionism, he often ends up working long hours and has to fight a lot of self-imposed stress. His friends often take it upon themselves to remind Nagisa to take care of himself, and they periodically try to get him out of the apartment to do fun things. Nagisa's idea of fun, however, would be much more akin to staying home and relaxing with a good book.

I'm going to take some inspiration from you and also have a few headcanons about Older Nagisa as a dad since I would absolutely love to see him settle down and have a family of his own one day, when he is ready.

Nagisa's family is the most important thing in the world to him and his children are his pride and joy in life. He strives to be the best father he can, and he is incredibly devoted and attentive though he does have a tendency to worry about his children very much. When his son takes after him with similar worries, self-imposed stress, and perfectionism, for instance, Nagisa is very concerned, and it hits him particularly hard since the last thing he wanted was for his child to have the same kinds of burdens he does. However, he helps his son through that and reassures him that he has a father who loves him regardless of his successes or failures. It is incredibly important to Nagisa that his children never doubt that his love for them is unconditional and will never need to be earned by living up to any expectations--he will love and support his kids no matter what and just wants them to try their best.

Despite having several children in the house, Nagisa's home is not particularly chaotic and loud since most of his kids aren't particularly rambunctious. His eldest daughter has a big personality, however, and often gets Nagisa to play all kinds of dress up games and tea parties with her. She also often asks him to style her hair into little antenna like his, and though he doesn't quite understand the appeal, he tries his best as hairdresser.

His eldest daughter's more happy-go-lucky and generally upbeat and cheerful personality sometimes causes Nagisa to wonder if he and his friends may have been like his little girl if not for the abuse, and the thought breaks his heart a little. His younger daughter is much more quiet and pensive than her sister and was adopted by Nagisa and his family after being rescued from an abusive situation. Coming from the background that he did, Nagisa is very sensitive to his daughter's trauma as she slowly begins to heal and is welcomed into the family.

When Nagisa's kids are very, very little they love to play with their dad's hair antenna and his reading glasses (which he eventually has from squinting at his work from hours on end).

Nagisa tries his best to be a very involved and attentive father who always makes sure to spend time with his family despite his busy schedule. One of his favorite activities for his family to do together is reading aloud to his children before he tucks them in at night.

[ramonadecember]

Okay okay. Since I can’t get enough of your boys despite all there rambles… here’s one for Cullen (and the rest will follow *hellmo.gif* )

1, 4, 8, 10, 12, 18, 22, 23, 28, 29, 32

dsalkjds okay. not to be confused with the DA character, my dearest Cullen, who I unfortunately named before i knew what dragon age was lmfaoo. and you ain't getting me to change his name now.

oldest of the quartet. built like a brick shithouse. the most well-adjusted of them all.

--

1. Does your character have siblings or family members in their age group? Which one are they closest with?

Cullen has two younger sisters by blood. They always got on well enough, but he hasn’t seen them in a real long while and that’s a big shame, but there hasn’t been time for pleasure trips home when he’s constantly being sent off on missions with his squad. But also, Cullen is from a real small village, and as one of the oldest of the young people, he ended up being like… ‘town big brother’ to a lot of kids.

4. Has your character ever witnessed something that fundamentally changed them? If so, does anyone else know?

Probably like, the ransacking of his village. Near the start of the war it was attacked, thinking that if the area where a lot of crops came from was harmed, it would harm the kingdom as a whole. Fighting back, both then and any subsequent times gave him purpose instead of just kind of going through the day to day motions of life. Most people at least like, know the story, because how he rallied others and how hard he fought back is what got him his special like ~elite forces~ role.

8. Has your character ever fired a gun? If so, what was their first target?

He has not, because even though it’s an ambiguously modern fantasy world where guns ain’t a thing because I say so. It’s all magic and cool swords and shit. But in a world where they DID exists, he’d be the top candidate out of all the characters to have shot a gun due to the nature of his work in a like, military-adjacent field. And since he grew up in the boonies, I imagine he woulda been like me and my friends, setting up random targets out back to shoot at because nothing was back there except cornfields.

10. Does your character feel more comfortable with more clothing, or with less clothing?

Probably less. ‘Do you even own a shirt’ is definitely something that’s been asked of him before lmao. Cullen has like, zero shame and will strip down around just about anyone, and that’s received some… mixed reactions from those around him. The other members of his squad are used to it, except for Sasha who wasn’t around long enough for it, and people like Bannan and Ivan might end up spontaneously combusting over it.

12. In what situation was your character the most calm they’ve ever been?

(Okay you know I struggled with this one lmfao) One instance would be after Sasha got real hurt. Not immediately after, then he absolutely r a g e d. But after they got Sasha to a hospital, and after Bannan came sweeping in… right about then. Sasha was being looked after by someone who really cares about him, he didn’t have to constantly worry about him anymore. It was right about then that Cullen decided he wasn’t letting Sasha back on his squad after he healed up and as shitty of a decision as it was… it made him feel a lot lighter.

18. Is your character more likely to admire wisdom, or ambition in others?

Wisdom. Because of the war they find themselves in, and even his own role in it, Cullen has had quite enough of people who will try to achieve their goals by any means necessary. He much more appreciates those that take the time to think through their decisions and learn from their mistakes… much prefers people who will use their damn brain.

22. What does your character like in other people?

Communication—those who will actually use their words, or at least try. Sincerity—whatever you do just… mean it. Self-awareness—people who are cognizant of their actions and how the effect others.

23. What does your character dislike in other people?

Impulsiveness—rarely does it work out, often has Cullen seen it end in disaster. Posturing—he has no patience for alpha male bullshit. Whining—there comes a point where you gotta actually try to find a solution.

28. How quick or slow is your character to resort to physical violence in a confrontation?

Cullen is, to put it simply, huge, and so while he might not like to resort to violence right away, he will resort to threats, because that has a tendency to nip problems the bud when a confrontation arises, because not many want to mess with the very burly dude that towers over them. Since he gets enough unavoidable confrontation in his line of work to last him a life time, he tries to avoid it outside of his duty if he can.

29. What did your character dream of being or doing as a child? Did that dream come true?

Cullen wasn’t much for big dreams. Before receiving the offer to join the Crown’s elite forces (seriously, one day I’ll stop just calling him ‘special ops’ but it’s the quickest to getting the point across), he mostly thought he’d take up farming as was the most popular and necessary job option in the area he’s from. If anything… it wasn’t necessarily a dream, but he always found metalwork/blacksmithing of interest and thought that his fire magic abilities might come in handy in that role. Plus like… swords cool.

32. Describe a scenario in which your character feels most uncomfortable.

Formal events, especially back in the day. When his presence was first starting to be required at those types of things because of his new status due to the whole ~elite forces~ thing, he found it absolutely awful. So many people looked down on him because they thought that’ elite’ went hand in hand with ‘high born.’ They didn’t like that he was some random hick and they weren’t very subtle about that belief either. And if it wasn’t that, people started to make him into like, the poster child for how even The Poors can be doing their part in the war. Now, he still hates the pageantry and the fairness and all the damn rules, but he knows how to deal with it better. The events make his skin crawl less now that they’re attended by some people whose company he actually enjoys…

[sapphim]

Really thinking hard about how to handle Sebastian in the new climax crisis mod because when I initially made no seb climax crisis (as my *checks* third published mod, five years ago) I was really dissatisfied with what I was able to accomplish with the options I had available for modding back then.

I’ve talked at length before about the problems I have with Seb’s content in the climax but it mostly boils down to 1) quite a bit of it feels more like hamfisted movie villainry than a meaningful emotional response and 2) since Sebastian is dlc (and not even day 1 dlc), the entire scene is structured around the assumption that he won’t be present by default, and thus most of his dialogue, rather than contributing meaningfully to the conversation, insists of him shouting into the void while no one reacts.

I’m trying to come at this with a fresh outlook and not reference any of the choices I made in the past. But, anyway, here’s what I’m toying with rn. Feedback appreciated.

I removed most of his lines from my mockup of the dialogue so that approaching it I will be making decisions about which lines to add in rather than which lines to remove, but I’ve already decided to retain the following exchanges in the conversation following the chantry boom.

Orsino: The Circle didn't even do this! Champion, you can't let her! Help us stop this madness! Meredith: And I call on you to keep order! After what just occurred, you cannot deny what must be done. (or) Meredith: And I demand you stand with us! Even you must see that this outrage cannot be tolerated. Sebastian: Why are we debating the Right of Annulment when the monster who did this is right here? (But this then segues back into other npc reactions which are normally skipped if Sebastian is present)

Also this:

Hawke: Was that... why you needed me to distract the grand cleric? Sebastian: This? This is what you tried to trick me into doing? Sebastian: And you went along with him! Anders: If you knew what I was doing, you would have felt honor-bound to stop me. I couldn't take that chance. (or) Hawke: Was that... why you needed me to distract the grand cleric? Sebastian: You were... part of this? Anders: If you knew what I was doing, you would have felt honor-bound to stop me. I couldn't take that chance.

Also this:

Anders: The Circle is an injustice, in many places beyond Kirkwall. The world needs to see. Sebastian: Elthina is not the Circle! She was a good woman, and you murdered her! Orsino: You fool! You've doomed us all!

It’s the second part of the conversation that’s more problematic, in which Hawke and Anders have a big long back and forth conversation while the camera periodically cuts to Sebastian, featuring absolutely no one reacting to anything he says.

Thinking about moving a few lines around if I can find places for them that flow better, ex.

Hawke: Opinions? Sebastian: He should be killed on the spot. With the templars busy, there is no one who can contain him until a trial. Sebastian: If I'd been in that chantry today, would you be waffling? You know what must be done!

Then there’s the tricky part, which is actually dealing with Hawke letting Anders live despite Seb’s objections. Most of Sebastian’s “im gonna go to starkhaven  and raise an army to return and destroy you all for harboring this criminal” dialogue is absolutely unusable lmfao. Admittedly, I can theoretically cut down existing audio lines now so some of them might be partially salvageable, but I’m not counting on it.

The best existing objection (which I ended up using in the first mod) is

Sebastian: You condone this? The brutal death of an innocent woman of faith? Someone you knew! Who trusted you!

Then I want to add a third option to the dialogue wheel (which I wanted to add five years ago but didn’t know how to make it work perfectly at the time) so, thus:

Choice #1 (text): ? something something bigger picture ? won’t undo what he’s done ? need all the help we can get ? idk Choice #1 (dialogue): 6195829 I'm sorry about the grand cleric. But there's much more at stake. Choice #2 (text): 6087747 Stay out of this. or 6144517 Stand down. Choice #2 (dialogue): 6182459 Do not interfere, Sebastian. Choice #3 (text): 6182489 Fine. Anders dies. Choice #3 (dialogue): 6182488 He's right. The grand cleric deserves justice.

No edits made to the scene if you kill Anders. (And credit where credit is due, I do think that exchange is well-written)

Hawke: He's right. The grand cleric deserves justice. Anders: Yes. I would not deny anyone's right to that.

The paraphrase for the other existing option has been changed, and if you tell him to fuck off he will still leave and you’ll never see him again (though uhhhhhhhh hopefully less looking like he’s being set up to be the sequel villain). This line is probably staying, at least:

Sebastian: I gave up on Starkhaven to serve the Maker, but He has turned his back on Kirkwall for harboring heretics like this.

The first option is the one that will allow him to stay if his end-stage questioning beliefs has been completed, otherwise it will segue back into him leaving. This line I miraculously found hanging out in another conversation is such a godsend for that:

Sebastian: By Chantry law, these mages must be contained. But Elthina, bless her, feared Meredith as much. Sebastian: I will stand with you, Hawke.

Though that’s only useful if Hawke sides with the mages. In the existing mod when Hawke sides with the templars and Seb qualifies to stay I believe it goes

Hawke: Help me restore order. Anders: Fight with the templars. Against the Circle. Anders: Perhaps that is the only way to make this right. Stop this war before it's too late. Anders: If you think that is a better atonement than my death, I am with you for so long as I can maintain my grip on the monster inside me. Sebastian: It will never be enough, but it's a start.

Which might still be the best I can do.

As for setting the end-stage questioning beliefs as the threshold for Seb to stay, I think that’s perfectly consistent with everyone else. Aveline, Merrill, and Fenris are now always stay if you side with their preferred side, always stay if you side against their preferred side and you’ve completed their end-stage, and never stay otherwise. Anders is always stay if you side with the mages (and ask him to stay), always stay if you side with the templars (and ask him to stay) and you’ve completed his end-stage rivalry, and never stay otherwise. Seb would be always stay if you kill Anders, always stay if you refuse to kill Anders but have completed his end-stage, and never stay otherwise.

Admittedly, Aveline, Merrill, and Fenris all give you a chance to recruit them back in a later conversation (and the vanilla threshold is that they’ll agree if they’re not between 50%-100% rivalry), but if you side with the templars you have one chance to keep Anders or else he’s gone for good, and I think that’s fair with Seb as well.

So obviously uhhhhhh most of what’s left to do is cobble together a collection of lines of dialogue for the Seb stays/Seb goes exchange that actually feels like a real conversation. Which is the difficult and subjective part. But being able to commandeer lines like “I'm sorry about the grand cleric. But there's much more at stake.“ and “By Chantry law, these mages must be contained. But Elthina, bless her, feared Meredith as much.” help a lot at least.

Anyway that’s my rambling on my current thought process out of the way lmfao thanks for reading.

[gingus-doon]

pov u just shot your childhood hero, wdyd

i.e. i ramble about keiji post-shooting; his occupation, what he does, how he copes, how he feels, etc. etc.

just putting this little thing here because the post got quite long and i couldn't split it up because it's all somewhat related. it started out as a rant / informal ramble but then it got serious lololol

—

one thing i don't understand is why people hc keiji as still having a job with the police post-shooting? like that just doesn't make sense to me– not only based on his character but like... why would you wanna make him a cop with all the talk of how much the police suck lately? personally i'm a brown bitch so i couldn't be down with thirsting over a cop lol. it's just kinda confusing sjdhd

i've seen the hc of him as a private investigator, though, which i like! it's a very neat way to let him flex his detective skills without being part of a corrupt organization and without forsaking his own personal beliefs and feelings about the police, because i don't think those would change anywhere near easily and i just kinda can't see him going back into the police force because of that.

i have often wondered what keiji would do after the death game, and what he was doing before the death game or after the shooting, because i think he'd definitely quit after the shooting, with all the grief and trauma surrounding the job and his newfound cynicism.

i don't think he'd be doing private investigation before the game, or more specifically, before his character develops into something reminiscent of his old self– as he is at the start of the game, he just doesn't have that faith in protection, so i can't imagine him being an investigator at that point. HOWEVER, in a post death game OR non-death game au where keiji has started to pull himself up from that tar (most likely with the help of others lol) i think that's definitely a plausible option for him and i like it a lot :]

as for other options, though... i really don't know! this is more of a stupid idea but i considered him working in a convenience store like shin lol. i had a whoooole au about him, kai, and shin working in the same convenience store just because they can't hold down any other jobs / don't know what else to do for work. shin is able to actually hold down the job because the last manager was mysteriously taken out of commission (i don't know lol) and they were ridiculously short-staffed already so shin ended up being the "most qualified" for the now vacant position. keiji's had a string of odd jobs since the police and this is just the next one. he's hoping to find something with a better wage but this'll do for now, it's even in walking distance from his apartment. and kai, kai's trying to exercise more independence from the chidouins' after becoming his own person! so he gets what i think would be his first job (well, his first official job, anyway... being an assassin and the chidouins' personal maid were more unofficial gigs lol.) ahh that was a lotta rambling about my dumb little au but i just think it'd be neat, they're three of my favourite characters so having them just vibe with each other at work and become friends sounds nice 2 me :] also Coincidentally i ship literally every combination of those three characters so that may have played a part in my casting decisions lmfao

oh wow that was a really long and uncalled for synopsis but this is just a rambly post so it can't really be uncalled for because this post doesn't have any particular point lol (A/N after writing this— IT HAS A POINT NOW, DISREGARD PAST ME)

SO ANYWAY ! i was just considering what keiji would do right after the shooting. honestly i have noooo idea, it's the beginning of a long road of him burying his trauma in a desperate attempt to avoid facing the pain it brings, and it marks a profound loss of innocence which makes his heart begin to grow cold. it's just hard to see the beginning of the process when where he started and where he ended up are very different places.

obviously, he'd quit his job. i wonder if the hallucinations would start right away? him being naïve in the beginning, i'm sure he'd acknowledge them– cry out apologies and plead for forgiveness until his throat is hoarse. the rule of hallucinations in yttd seems to be that if you acknowledge them, they'll burn themselves into your brain and you'll never be rid of them– implying that keiji has done so, as it's likely been years since the shooting and he's still suffering from the visions despite seeming to ignore them now.

ahh, i'm getting in my feelings about keiji now 😭😭 when i started this, i wanted to be held by him, but now i just wanna hug him like damnnnn

but back to what he'd do after the shooting– this scenario is self indulgent, but wouldn't it be nice if he took some time off and just stayed at his mom's place for a while? help her with chores while she's at work, try to regain a sense of normalcy in his childhood home...

i don't think he'd be able to do this right after the shooting. keiji had shame, once upon a time– the guilt would rack him like nothing else. i can imagine him spending a lot of late nights with alcohol, just wishing it was a dream. his resentment towards megumi slowly building as he feels he's being left in the dark as to why, why he isn't allowed to atone, why she's being so cold towards him about the shooting when he's suffering so heavily from the effects of it.

he wouldn't want to be around his dear mom as a murderer, and as a resentful alcoholic who's coping very poorly with his circumstances.

also (tangent incoming), i kind of wonder about keiji and alcohol a lot. in his fondness events with mishima, he says the following—

the "haven't drank that much in years" part makes me wonder– for how long? did he start to restrain himself before the shooting or after? i would say it's most likely after, considering the "feels like it'll swallow me up" comment he made soon after. and, how he talked about binge drinking when he was still a newbie. perhaps it was fine for him to do so, before the shooting— he'd just get wasted and flirt, have a good time. but after, it morphed into an inefficient coping mechanism which he fell far within the depths of to try and control the worst of his grief and self hatred. after that, heavy drinking couldn't just be for fun anymore.

i assume in the "before it got this way" comment, the "way" he's referring to is how he doesn't drink much anymore? or, he could be talking about the depression drinking, but i think the prior makes more sense.

even though i think, given keiji's example of drinking with megumi, that he could have gotten blackout drunk a couple of times purely for fun pre-shooting, i think here he's referring to the painful side of his relationship with alcohol here, the part that took place when he was trying to cope with his trauma. i think he brings up the story of drinking with megumi immediately after, then, to avoid talking about that part of his past. though he doesn't show it much, i think he's deeply ashamed of himself. not only of what he's done, but how he's handled it afterwards.

on a lighter note, though, it's quite funny to think of Lawful Good young keiji shinogi getting drunk off his ass and flirting with every woman he comes across willing to flirt back. like, what's up with that??? he seems like such a serious dork in the flashbacks, but doing well in his police job, he just... lets loose?? no no, honestly i think he hadn't drank much before going out with megumi and he took her insistence on him drinking a little too far, and with his inexperience with alcohol and the successive lack of self restraint that comes with each new drink, you get casanova shinogi, lmao.

BACK TO THE SERIOUS STUFF THOUGH !! i really like the idea of him going to his mom to help him pull himself back together. i think they'd have a solid relationship, fight me! he seems to adore his mom as a child with a good single parent usually does. i'm sure he appreciates her immensely for all the care and love she managed to give him when he was a kid while also working her ass off to support them financially. this very respect for her is what i think would drive him to isolate himself from her after the shooting– as i said above, he's a murderer now. a disappointing human being in general, and an even worse son. to let down his mother who worked so hard to raise him right... how could he? as his condition worsens and his heart grows colder, i'm sure that feeling would fester inside of him. he'd try to ignore it, as he does with everything else, but it's already wrapped its tendrils around his soul. that particular guilt isn't leaving him any time soon.

now that i'm thinking about it, also, i don't think it's likely that he'd quit his job right right away. it'd be more of a slow descent over the span of a few weeks. immediately after the shooting, he may stop showing up to work for a while. he just can't put on that uniform when it's practically caked in the blood of someone he held in such high esteem for so long. eventually, though, he gets a hold on himself– just a bit. he doesn't want to be cooped up in his apartment with his thoughts anymore, and he doesn't want to lose his job. what else would he do?

so, he takes it easy on the first few days back. megumi tries to make it easy for him. paperwork, whatever job he could do that's not on the field. he clings to her like a wounded puppy, hoping that she'll explain why she's covering it up when he doesn't want her to, what he's supposed to do with these feelings around the incident. he's drowning, and she's made herself a big sister figure to him– she's supposed to help him. but, she shrugs him off when he brings it up. she's so harsh about it compared to how she usually speaks to him. perhaps because of her own guilt around the incident, perhaps it's the family's response and how keiji is now, how panicked and sleep deprived the poor kid has looked since that day.

so he continues to spiral with nothing to hold on to. grasps at alcohol in a futile attempt to stop falling, because it's all he can think to fall back on. he's a wreck at work– he's barely living, much less working. but megumi tries her best to keep him from getting fired. she'll get him coffee and breakfast and try to say something encouraging. "hey. hang in there, shinogi." with a touch on the shoulder. but in spite of her efforts, of course, it hits a breaking point. everyone in the job thinks keiji's too damaged to continue, saying he either needs to see a shrink or get the hell out of the way and let everyone else do their job.

and keiji just stops coming into work one day.

the downward spiral ensues.

[crimsondelphi]

( tristin mays, 27, cis female, she/her/hers, april 13th ) Was that DELPHINE DESCHAMPS ? I heard a rumor they work for the FAUST family, but who knows for sure ? They can be a bit RESENTFUL & DESTRUCTIVE, but I also heard they can be RESOURCEFUL & VENTURSOME. You’ll usually find them at THE DEN in their spare time, when they’re not being the OWNER OF TONY’S GUNS & SPORTING GOODS/CARCANOS. You may want to keep an eye on that one !

guess who’s back? back again? it’s me! baz! and i’m so sorry lmfao. delphi is a brand spankin’ new muse, so bear with while i flesh her out! and i could ramble for days, so i’m going to try to not do that and just hit y’all with the facts so !!! here we goooooo!

pinterest. stats. someday a wanted connections page will be up, but today is not that day.

quick facts

full name: delphine odette deschamps. nicknames: del or delphi. anything else gets you shot. hometown: new orleans, louisiana. family: raimond & celeste deschamps - deceased, paternal uncle - deceased, an unknown half sibling - living. zodiac: aries sun, capricorn moon, sagittarius rising.  sexuality: pansexual. education: community college in new york - unfinished associates in arts. two year tattoo artist apprenticeship completed. 

that good ish ( death/murder mention tw, general spooky tw, violence tw, guns/weapons tw. )

born and raised in new orleans, delphine was raised on bourbon street. her father was a jazz musician and her mother owned and ran a voodoo shop.

her mother actively practiced voodoo while she was growing up, but stopped shortly after her parents’ deaths.

because of their unique lifestyles, del was the definition of street rat. she was well known within the community and almost every shop keeper and street musician kept an eye on her for her parents. she was v much raised by the community and she loved it. 

despite the turn her life would later take, delphine has only happy memories of her childhood. her parents, unconventional as they were, filled her life with nothing but love and adventure. 

( death/murder tw ) at the age of 13, both of delphine’s parents were killed on their way home from one of her father’s gigs.

it was later discovered that he’d developed a gambling addiction and it’s assumed that they were targeted for that reason. the case has never officially been closed and is considered a cold case. 

after the death’s of her parents, del became a ward of the state and bounced from foster home to foster home until her only blood relative was found.

( violence & gun/weapon tw ) a paternal uncle in new york that delphine had only met a handful of times was now her full time guardian and oh boY. 

shady was this man’s middle name. he owned a furniture company that operated as a front for his arms dealing operation. 

also v openly violent - got into a lot of fights and hid exactly none of it from delphine. 

not shockingly, mans had zero clue how to raise a teenager so kid gloves were nonexistent and a v impressionable and grieving delphine was thrust into a life of violence and crime that quickly became her new normal. 

del had always been smart and, because her uncle wasn’t super stellar at the healthy parenting thing, she quickly picked up on the family business and anything and everything involving firearms and weapons. 

ofc this meant her uncle was thrilled ( bc he’d be able to use her ) and that positive reinforcement was all she needed to dive head first into anything she thought would earn her that same positive reinforcement.

spoiler alert: none of those things were good. all bad. v bad. but delphine is a pro at figuring out what people want/expect from her and using it to her advantage. aka living with her uncle brought out literally the worst side of her and amplified it.

as soon as delphine was old enough to legally start working for the furniture store, she did. that meant she also got a closer look at the arms dealing her uncle was doing. by the time she graduated high school, delphi was her uncle’s right hand in the family business - helping him make major decisions and aiding in making new and more lucrative deals.

delphine did enroll in a local community college, where she studied art history for about a year before dropping out. during that time, she also started apprenticing at a local tattoo shop, mostly for fun and a way to take a break from the violence and guns of it all. even after she dropped out of college, del continued and finished her apprenticeship, continuing to tattoo part time until she moved to chicago.

( death/violence tw ) during a gun trade gone bad, delphine’s uncle was killed. to say she was devastated was an unbelievable understatement. as toxic as their relationship may have been, her uncle was the last of her biological family that delphine had. losing him felt like a finality she wasn’t ready to accept and, honestly, probably never really has.

it was 6 months before delphine was back to normal and, in that time, her uncle’s arms business had descended into chaos. as much as she dreaded staying in new york a second longer than she needed to, delphine couldn’t let that be her uncle’s legacy. so, del stuck around long enough to get the business back up and running with more competent and willing people running it. 

it was during that time that she encountered the faust family. after that, she learned everything she could about the family and their operations running out of chicago. at that point, her mind was made up.

as soon as she was able, delphine packed her meager belongings and moved to chicago with the intentions of joining the fausts. 

for the past two-ish years, delphine has worked her ass off to get to where she is now and she is thriving. dysfunctional as they may be, del considers the fausts her family, despite her gruff, prickly demeanor. she’s putting down roots, hopefully for the last time, but it is chicago, so who knows.

personality

okay okay, so del is 100% grumpy cat ( rip ). the rbf is strong and she takes exactly zero shit from anyone ( unless you’re her boss. she’s a v selective people pleaser? don’t ask me, i just work here ). she’s sarcastic and rude and generally an asshole even if she does like you. the only difference between how she treats people she likes and people she doesn’t is she threatens the people she likes with violence slightly less frequently.

possible connections

lord help us all - i’m the worst as these but !!! 

all the faust connections. pls and thank. bonus points if you get her even a little squishy. idk if it’s possible but let’s try. it’ll be a fun game.

employees at tony’s, pls and thank.

sparring buds! pls let her kick someone’s ass the reg. she needs to let out her aggression.

den buddies! has she been betting on fights? mayhaps. gimmie some friendly ( can she do friendly idk we’ll find out ) rivalry.

past hook-ups/flings. del is not someone who does serious, so she’s probably got a string of one night stands and fwbs all over the place. she’s a unabashed hoe and she ain’t sorry.

uuuuhhh, and literally anything else??? i’m open to absolutely everything always, so pls don’t be afraid to chuck any and all ideas my way!

[dreamsafterhours]

college boyfriend!markhyuk au series: III (mark’s pathway)

a universe in which roommates!markhyuk meet each other's s/o in class

markhyuk are roommates, my/n and dy/n are roommates, mark and dy/n take classes together and so do donghyuk and my/n — how will their fates intertwine?

genre: fluff pairings: mark+my/n (fem), donghyuk+dy/n (fem), platonic!mark+dy/n, platonic!donghyuk+my/n format: dotpoint AU universe: non idol, college bf warning: some swearing

masterlist

or click here to meet your soulmate, paediatrics!donghyuk!

II ⇤ | III | ⇥ IV

III: 별빛이 내린다 샤라랄라랄라라 (2+2=4)

the meeting of two souls: mark & my/n

hi hello good day how are you? i hope you're well today/tonight this is like 3 weeks late isn't it :D pls don't come after me i lost some motivation to write for a while but here i am now so let's get to it!!

aight so you met donghyuk's roommate for the first time yesterday and,,

you honestly had NO IDEA someone could be that cute

highkey regretting not asking for his name but you were so caught up in lingering on the fact that he implied you were pretty , like wHO DOES THAT ASDFKJL

you highkey shouted the verbal equivalent of a keyboard smash with ur roommate and she was all !! oh so this guy cute cute

you were contemplating whether or not to sneakily ask donghyuk for his name but you were worried bc hyuk has,, crazy sense when it comes to reading people and seeing through their words

and honestly you didn’t want to have to deal with hyuk potentially teasing the shit out of u for having a maybe crush on his roommate whom u’d just met

so you just beat your pillow sleep on it after your roommate reminds you it’s getting late and no life decisions should be made after 12am!! live by it

you wake up craving jjajangmyeon but alas if you were to get any satisfaction of that kind of hunger, it was going to have to wait because

~~ we love ~~ packed schedules ~~ in this house ~~

i hopes the sarcasm was noted in that previous sentence bc now u wish for life to cease

4 weeks into the semester and you were drowning in the midst of reports and lab pracs and content and revision

you were ready to ascend to the next life with only regret and an ability to vaguely explain the properties of a prokaryotic cell and endosymbiosis

but honestly donghyuk’s been a big help throughout the past month

your only friend in classes

official study buddy

2am revision session consultant

personal older brother bc he claimed you as his adoptive sister

another reason your roommate told you to go to bed was bc you literally have

a tutorial class + 2 consecutive 1.5 hour lectures + a 3 hour lab class to finish your day off

with no break for lunch in between :’((

looks like you’ll be starving through your library study session with dy/n

but oop

you find that dy/n had stayed up long after you’d fallen asleep writing her essay 

leaving your dorm feeling a twinge of guilt that u might have distracted her from focusing on her work to listen to your rambles and kept her up later than she should have been

but a text from her in the afternoon reassures u that honestly she wasn’t even planning to write that essay and The Feels™ had just hit her last night and that she made it to class

you: oh PHEW that’s good

you: sorry i didn’t wake you up on my way out, u looked so peaceful i couldn’t bear to disturb

dy/n 🦁: dw dw it’s all g i made it n e way

dy/n 🦁: also is it cool if my friend and his friend comes to the study sesh as well we have to go through some lecture content

you: ah yes don’t see why not :)) i’ll probs have my earphones in the entire time anyways lmao won’t affect me

but will it

“who u texting in the middle of diffusion” cue hyuk peering over at the phone you’re hiding in your lap

you click your tongue at him and lock your phone, “someone twice the man you’ll ever be”

he gasps in mock horror like he’d just witnessed a murder as quietly as he can ,,

“you’re texting a guy? in the middle of diffusion?”

“no. my roommate lmao”

“and what? is it me or your roomma—”

“—my roommate” you glance back up at the prof without looking at him

“ouch”

“you dare?”

“if i don’t dare, who will”

and due to this exchange, you miss the osmosis slide

“ah shit what was osmosis again”

“lmfao what makes u think i know that”

(pause)

“isn't it just.. net movement of free water molecules from an area of high concentration to an area of low concentration”

sorry my bio neural pathways are being excited again after being revisited for the first time in two years

/stares at him/ “why was that infuriating to hear from u”

after class you prepare to head to your dreaded 3-hour lab class you have with donghyuk but he stands up and stares into the void blankly

“where am i going”

“where do u think”

“oh, hell, most likely”

you scoff at the accuracy and drag him out of the lecture hall

you look at donghyuk and he’s visibly resisting the urge to poke your cheek when he first puts on his gloves

“what’s with you today”

he stares at his hands forlornly, “idk ask that to my timetable”

“week 4 got u dead huh”

he glances at you with a frown, “don’t act like u’re not dying too”

“damn. touché”

to your dismay, the lab class runs later than scheduled and you get out of it 20 minutes after it was meant to finish but luckily it’s your last class

with a quick goodbye to donghyuk and a text letting dy/n know you were going to be a lil late, u stop by ur dorm to pick up ur textbook before rushing to the library

you were highkey exhausted and just. famished by that point

but a promise is a promise and you weren’t going to back out of one now

especially when you felt like you owed your roommate one and it was you who originally suggested a library session

so you get to the library, bag strap slung over your shoulder, checking the photo of the seats dy/n had saved for you in the library

highkey getting lost once or twice but you manage

you get to the general area and spot dy/n sitting at a four-seater (wow how’d they get that) but you

freeze when you see who’s sitting next to her

it’s ??

????????

????????????????

/error 404/

????????????????

????????

ur heart goes into panic mode bc

it’s not even kidding it’s donghyuk’s roommate

and despite ur brain short-circuiting

you manage to remember that dy/n had said that mentioned her friend’s.. roommate.. also coming along..

and if her friend was donghyuk’s.. roommate..

you: :                             )

you: oh my god they were roommates

and speak of the devil

“oh hey fancy seeing u here”

you turn around and it’s donghyuk legit chills right there

you barely reply a “hi”

“i thought u were going to ur dorm for dinner”

“ah yeah—no i’m.. gonna go over some.. diffusion”

“oii! over here dude” his roommate whisper-yells out at donghyuk

dy/n waves at you “heYY my/n”

donghyuk waves and turns back to you “welp i’m gonna join a study group.. you could join if you came alone? i’m sure they won’t mind”

“about that”

“u waiting for someone?”

“i’m going over there too”

“what?”

he glances over at the table and then back to you

“that’s my roommate. right there next to your roommate”

you point her out and then donghyuk’s jaw drops

“what the fUC—” and you both. burst iinto laughter at the ridiculousness of the situation

like ?? how???

“wOW r u KIDDING”

“HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN”

“talk about a coincidence.. oh my god my cheekbones hurt” he says as he clutches his side

so you get to the table and dy/n tries to introduce u to donghyuk’s roommate

“mark, this is my/n, my/n this is mark”

ah yes so mark is his name, you think

cute name for a cute boi

“nice to meet you again, mark”

dy/n: “?? again?”

mark gives u a rlly wide smile “yeah we’ve met. hi my/n”

you swear you’ve never had your heart flutter like this

fdksoafjadgioarigilf

then mark introduces dy/n to donghyuk and they start talking about how they’re your legal guardian and telling the other to “get in line”

leaving you in middle like “ok mum and dad” but also thinking back to when donghyuk was highkey flirting with you,, and now how he’s flirting with dy/n ,, oh dude he’s flirting

and highkey ,,, you don’t have any hard feelings about it ,, you know she’s also got this kind of humour code and she’s far more comfortable with meeting new people

until dy/n jokes about custody rules and donghyuk replies with “who says we’re split”

ok mum and dad

n e ways you came to study and study you will

so you settle down and go through your notes for the day

albeit being a lil distracted by mark who sits right across from you somehow, somewhy,,

somewhy should be a word you can’t tell me how to english

you keep wanting to steal glances at him but you have to physically restrain yourself from doing so

and also donghyuk who keeps poking u under the table and texting u even though he’s right next to you

💩hyuk: bro

💩hyuk: bro

💩hyuk: bro

💩hyuk: bro

💩hyuk: bro

you: wHAT

💩hyuk: nvm lol

you: im boutta slap u. give me my pen back i saw that

💩hyuk: damn

💩hyuk: also r u hungry

you: terribly

you: why

💩hyuk: does ur roommate have any allergies

you: not that i know of

you: again

you: why

you: u buyin?

💩hyuk: 🤡<- you

💩hyuk: 🤡, how do you feel about dinner

you: invalid question. no variable answer

💩hyuk: alright, 🤡. im not buying for u

you glower at him but he isn’t looking at u,, he leans back and laments about how he’s craving chinese food

did he read your damn mind how did he know

and apparently he’s read dy/n’s mind too at how she jumps up at the mention of chinese and agrees profusely

so you find yourself abandoning your studies for the rest of the night and in a restaurant lmfao

“chill,, guys,,, jjajang is fine”

rock paper scissors for the cheque ends in mark’s tears

“no it’s ok. i’m ok it’s our first meeting as a fateful group and it makes sense! for me to pay”

after you satisfy your cravings the boys walk dy/n and you back to your dorm

mark tells dy/n to give him her bag for him to carry and while she practically gives it up to him, he has to insist that he’ll carry yours too

to which you’re like omg no it’s fine i can carry it it’s not that heavy i swear—

until donghyuk takes ur bag off ur shoulder and passes it to mark

because of the narrow path, you’re forced to walk in pairs and you end up walking next to donghyuk who makes happy sounds about how good that food was and how priceless mark’s face was when he lost rock paper scissors

then dy/n takes the initiative to make a group chat for you four,, asking for donghyuk’s number to add

you give her a look like damn gurl but you have no idea if she saw or if she just ignored you on purpose lmfao

also donghyuk looked way too happy afterwards

either way you slapped her when you got back to the dorm like “SINCE WHEN WERE YOU SO ?? BRAVE?”

dy/n: um

dy/n: honey

dy/n: have you met me

and thus the chaos of a group chat was born and just like a real child, you spent hours on it

dy/n 🦁: ok we inside

you: thanks for dinner again mark!

💩hyuk: he says you’re welcome

💩hyuk: i say we “accidentally” lose our purses next time we go out

you: nah you’re paying next

💩hyuk: y

💩hyuk: y, 🤡

dy/n 🦁: yes y, 🤡

dy/n 🦁: HAHAH WHY IS SHE 🤡

💩hyuk: i thought you of all people would know

dy/n 🦁: why is she just as dumb in class as she is in the dorm?

💩hyuk: i knew it

dy/n 🦁: she poured too much hot water into her tea the other day it overflowed and spilt onto her foot

mark: oh no were u okay

💩hyuk: looks like you’re gonna have to study osomsis

💩hyuk: osmoiss

💩hyuk: fuck

you: yes i’m okay it wasn’t that hot i had socks on too

💩hyuk: osmosis

dy/n 🦁: avoided tragedy luckily

💩hyuk: finally

you: there is a reason you’re saved as 💩hyuk on my phone

dy/n 🦁: HAAHAHAHAHHAHAH

seriously you just don’t know just how much this group was going to mean to you yet

click here to meet your soulmate, paediatrics!donghyuk!

II ⇤ | III | ⇥ IV

shoot me an ask if you’d like to be tagged in future parts!

[just-another-detective-boy]

honestly the highlight of my week is when you suddenly get super active Out Of Nowhere and my dash is flooded with the good good DCMK content, thank you sm!

Ah thank you so much for saying something so kind! The truth is, last month I quit a job that made me very unhappy and made my Narcolepsy harder to handle. I’ve since then switched to substitute teaching and have dedicated myself to my art and comics again! So now I am home so much more (my pet bunny has been WAY happy about this too)!! I have a few other health issues but since my decision and with better management, I’ve been doing a lot better!!! So it feels really good to be more active here too!  Lately, I keep seeing things that literally say “Go and do what makes you happy!” or “Don’t give up!” And despite all the unfortunate situations that happen in the DCMK world (lmfao), overall, it has a strong impression of those things at times, I think!   Sorry for such a long ramble! It’s just that you’ve made me really happy tonight! Thank you!

[no-hetsplanation-for-aa]

full thoughts on the ace attorney anime/a review under the cut. if you don’t want to be spoiled you can skip this but i just wanted to ramble for a bit:

i didn’t hate it as much as i had thought i would, maybe save for the farewell my turnabout episodes (you already know how i feel about those lmfao but i’ll elaborate more later). it was okay; a fun watch, but i have a lot of criticisms. since i’m better at lists i guess i’ll start doing things in list format now, let’s go!

pros:

-MAYA IS DRAWN REALLY CUTELY, LITERALLY ALWAYS. THE STAR OF THE SHOW

-the second opening honestly is pretty badass

-franziska is here, what more could i want

-characters like phoenix, maya, mia, oldbag and lotta have REALLY fitting voices, imo. maybe because they’re close to my headcanon voices for them but i think these five sound excellent

-after the first half of the series the characters start to look a lot more consistent. i was unhappy with how they were drawn and animated in the first 12 episodes but they got better, i think

cons:

-on the whole, despite the progression of the art from the first cour to the second, the show is pretty visually unappealing. the animation is choppy in parts and some characters (notably adrian) get renditions of themselves that are inferior to their game counterparts

-court breakdowns are INCREDIBLY underwhelming. i honestly cannot remember a single one that was handled or transitioned well

-adrian’s entire fucking arc oh my GOD i am NEVER going to shut up about this i’m just so MAD i don’t see how ANYONE COULD DO TH

-i know it’s hard to fit these stories into 24 episodes but the pacing felt rushed at points i feel it shouldn’t have. it glosses over or leaves out entirely plot points that were more emphasized in the games (see the above point for an example) and jumbles around dialogue that was meant for other parts of the story that were cut. the latter part is understandable, but it’s jarring if you’ve played the games

-speaking of breakdowns, i already mentioned this (in the tags of another post tho whoops) but franziska’s breakdown in 2-2 should have been much, MUCH more significant. i’m gonna talk about this for just a brief moment, if you will. remember her fist banging animation from the games?

-yeah, so you may think this is a pretty small, not-so-impactful animation, right? well, the anime manages to capture none of the character, the anger or the expressiveness of it. it’s so underwhelming it may as well have been cut too cuz you know they like to do that. all she does is stand over the bench and pound her fist a bit while talking to herself. no whipping, no lashing out, NOTHING. and i think that’s pathetic!! this is her first loss EVER since becoming a prosecutor; it’s a MAJOR event in her life and she’s PISSED and they just failed ASTRONOMICALLY to convey that

-speaking of franziska, again, would it kill them to have made her more expressive? i mean, it matches with the range of expressions she has in the game, i suppose, and she is supposed to be composed and refined.....maybe this one is more subjective though. i’m a person who regularly consumes and creates cartoons and it just made me kind of sad to only see basically one or two types of faces on her. augh

-another subjective thing but i really hate how much they emphasize lips on women. like yeah, people be out here having lips, but i guess there’s something that irks me about them having to be so....pink and prominent in anime (and this isn’t just a problem with this show. it’s a problem with media as a whole, tbh). gonna pull up some game sprites once again to show you what i mean:

(yeah i know i use franziska and adrian a lot as examples but my blog centers around them mostly i don’t know what to tell you)

then....you have the anime:

uggggh

again, very subjective. whether or not franziska for example wears lipstick in canon depiction really depends from appearance-to-appearance, and it’s not as if these characters can’t wear lipstick-- that is not at all what i’m getting at. the reason it irks me is that it just reeks of a creative decision made to emphasize beauty, or to say “hey! these characters are girls!” et cetera, which BOTHERS me on a personal level. you don’t have to be RADIATING FEMININITY to be a girl. end of story. you’re in no way obligated to agree with me on how much i hate this part but that’s just.....how i feel about it

the psyche-lock segment that was present in the games is completely gone in the anime, which is strange to me seeing as it’s still a major part of the series well past the second game. probably was cut to fit into the episode limits

-----------------

in sum: it was enjoyable, but there is quite a bit of room for much-needed improvement. honestly i feel that you may enjoy it better if you’ve never ever played any of the games in your life because you won’t have the same expectations of someone who has. if you have played the games, i still think it’s a worthwhile watch, but be warned you may or very likely will be disappointed

and.....to touch upon the last few episodes (case 2-4) briefly once more, since i’ve already screamed about it beforehand: this was a major letdown for me. i was expecting it because i had heard things about it, but it still kicked me in the shins with more disappointment i did not expect. in addition to changing celeste to be her sister (euugh why), they left out the bits about adrian’s mental illness ENTIRELY which...is a HUGE part of this case, and i don’t know why they did that. it feels that in this iteration she’s more of a throwaway character than anything--even in what bits they did leave for her after all the changes, her backstory and motives feel unimportant. they’re just thrown at you for a brief moment at the beginning at the case and only brought up once at the end. you don’t feel like she’s fighting for celeste; you don’t feel like she’s trying to hide her past, you just feel like there’s.....nothing there. this is not adrian, this is, ironically, a hollow husk of the character she is supposed to be, and honestly, how dare they

------------

that’s it thank you for reading this all if you made it this far lmao, you get an honorary attorney’s badge and an oatmeal cookie. toodles

[flameohs-blog]

Can you do a meta for Zuko on his Uncle Iroh, and the most significant lessons / pieces of wisdom that he learned from him?

META    ↪ ACCEPTING / @proditeur​​

ohh boyyy… i’m gonna have to do yet another rewatch to answer this to the fullest. i honestly don’t have the time to do that right now but i do want to answer this question since my muse for atla seems to be really strong these days. i’m gonna start by splitting this into different sections because i feel like there’s A Lot i could say. i hope everything flows and ya’ll can understand my ramblings lol

zuko & uncle iroh’s relationship

obviously when we’re introduced to the series, one of the first relationships we see is the one between zuko and iroh. u can tell right off the bat that they care about one another a lot, mostly u can tell from iroh more than zuko in the beginning until that changes later on. it’s def one of the strongest relationships we see throughout the series. i don’t rmr if the series explained why iroh had left with zuko after his banishment like whether that was thru iroh’s own volition or if he was driven out by ozai as well. either way, we all know that iroh thinks of zuko as a son after his own died.

i think that’s because zuko and iroh share similarities and iroh sees that. iroh sees the potential zuko has. in the beginning, zuko is an angry individual. he gets mad easily. he gets upset easily. he gets frustrated. we do see other parts of his personality and eventually we do see him change and he becomes more like iroh in a way. here’s the thing, though. while i do believe that zuko learned a lot from his uncle…

i’m going to argue that zuko learned a lot from everyone he ever interacted with as well. not saying that his relationship with his uncle isn’t important because, i mean, it IS. their relationship was introduced to us from the very beginning so of course it’s important. the thing i’m trying to get at is that although it was iroh who was there to guide zuko in a way on his journey, it was actually zuko who helped himself. iroh never rlly told zuko what to do with his life, it was zuko who figured it out on his own. it was zuko who realized his mistakes and learned from them and grew as a person.

zuko as an individual

i’ve written this on my other blog and i’ll say it again: zuko’s redemption arc works because he was never truly a bad guy despite his mistakes with the gaang in s1-2. zuko is written as the initial villain but that’s only cos he’s hunting the avatar who has been established as the protagonist of our series. he treats aang & co as his enemies BUT he treats other people just fine for the most part. and we see that from the very beginning like in the very first episode where he promises to leave the water tribe alone if aang goes with him or in a few episodes later where he foregoes chasing appa (+ aang) bc the most important  task at hand is getting his ship and his crew out of the bad weather and into safety. 

the only reason he’s chasing the avatar is bc in his mind that’s what’s gonna gain his father’s approval. and zuko in the first 2 seasons wants nothing more than his father’s love & acceptance & approval esp since his mother is no longer in the picture. and, you know, i’m sure zuko knows from an early age that his father isn’t the best person and nor is he the best parent but… all that is put aside simply bc of the fact that ozai is his father. they are blood related. and ppl can pretend like that doesn’t matter but when you’re young, when that’s all you have, it fucking matters. i can’t explain it well atm but children want the love & acceptance & approval from their parents. it’s normal. toph is another example of this, she wants those things but doesn’t have them. their situations in a way are similar yet manifests in different outcomes.

zuko’s drive to find the avatar and take him to the fire nation is only because of his desire for his father’s approval. but the thing is that zuko was always torn between his allegiance to his father and, idk, his allegiance to be himself. zuko is not like ozai or sozin or azulon. he isn’t like azula either. he doesn’t rlly share the same ideals they do in regards to the fire nation being #1 in the world or superior to other nations or however u wanna describe it. even if he didn’t get banished, i rlly don’t believe he’d turn into the type of person the previous generations of firelords were. i think ozai saw this in zuko and that’s why he favored azula over him. it was azula who possessed the traits ozai thought was important, not zuko. but what ozai considers weakness in zuko turns out to be his greatest strengths.

underneath all that anger in the beginning, zuko was always… kind in his own ways. and he learns to be open to change and growth. in season 2 when we see him free appa from underground and throw away his blue spirit mask, it’s supposed to symbolize this awakening/change in him. but in the end of season 2, he chooses to side with azula again because like i’ve said before his desire for his father’s approval is greater than his desire for… idk… whatever else. he’s still confused. as much as i wanted zuko to join the gaang earlier, it wasn’t time for him to. we had to wait until literally halfway thru book 3 to see that and it was a lil annoying cos i would have loved to see him join earlier so they could have all had more interactions but!!!!!! i truly don’t believe that zuko throwing away the blue spirit mask was enough, hence the betrayal at the end of s2. someone could be there to guide you or influence you but ultimately your decisions in life are your own. 

lessons zuko has learned on his journey 

a) episode 2x09 - bitter work

there’s a scene where iroh is explaining all four elements to zuko and how each element contributes to different nations’ idk personalities or culture or whatever. and i always thought that scene was beautiful bc iroh isn’t insulting other nations, he’s describing their strengths. and then iroh says: 

“it is important to draw wisdom from many different places. if you take it from only one place, it becomes rigid and stale. understand others–the other elements–and the other nations will help you become whole.”

like i honestly think zuko kinda already knew that but it was never worded to him that way. we see him also learn it on his own when he parts ways with his uncle and he’s off traveling on his own. zuko has also traveled the world for years after his banishment. there’s no way he’s out there thinking the fire nation’s beliefs are the only ones that matter. he’s learned a lot from his travels imo. about himself and about others. 

this is also the episode where iroh teaches zuko how to redirect lightning so, yanno, there’s that. in one of the earlier episodes, iroh reminds zuko about the breath and how that could save his life in the cold and also another time where he instructs zuko to break zhao’s root during a duel or whatever. so def iroh not only offers advice/wisdom thru words but also thru teaching zuko firebending.

b) episode 2x17 - lake laogai

imo this episode was Wild to me mostly cos of the confrontation between zuko and his uncle. zuko’s still thinking of capturing the avatar even though at this point he and iroh are fire nation fugitives and on the wanted list. zuko is still confused and torn between being true to himself and being the son his father wants him to be. it’s iroh’s words that honestly hit a lil too close to home for me too lmao. zuko says smth about how he knows his destiny and iroh says:

“is it your own destiny or is it a destiny someone else has tried to force on you? it is time for you to look inward and begin asking yourself the big questions: WHO are you and what do YOU want?”

like i’ve said before, zuko isn’t thinking about what he wants. or maybe he has but it’s not rlly a priority for him. his priority is still pleasing his father and the only way he knows how is to capture aang. he thinks that’s what’s gonna make him happy but…

c) episode 3x06 - the avatar and the firelord

obviously zuko isn’t happy. at this point he’s returned to the fire nation and finally has what he’s wanted for years: ozai’s approval. i’m not gonna say love cos i don’t believe for one second that ozai loved his son lmfao! and nor did he love azula but that’s another story for another day. anyways, zuko thought that “killing” the avatar would make him happy and being back home would make him happy but uh. he’s changed over the years. he’s still confused about what he wants vs what his father wants. 

it’s hard for people to break away from their families, man. it rlly truly is. we as the audience know that that’s what zuko has to do but honestlyyy how many of us irl are kind of in similar positions???? it’s hard to breakaway from family (the ppl who r supposed to support u) when you don’t have other strong connections and lbr zuko doesn’t. he had his uncle and he fucked it up. but anyway this entire episode was WILD and i loved every moment of it. it goes thru the story of avatar roku and his friend sozin. but the plot twist is that roku is zuko’s great grandfather which, tbh, i was not expecting at all LMFAO. maybe it was obvious to every1 else but, man, was i in shock lol. 

the lesson in this episode is that everyone is capable of being good or evil (as aang learns) but the other lesson is that this is kind of what finally pushes zuko to change. i mean he was never truly evil as we’ve seen in the past and he’s made bad decisions but it’s this moment that drives him to come to the goddamn epiphany that, no, he isn’t happy in the fire nation. 

d) episodes 3x10 & 3x11 - the day of black sun

zuko isn’t happy in the fire nation.his father needs to be stopped cos what he’s doing is wrong. and it’s a big fckn risk to defy the firelord and leave the comfort of your home behind… like what if the avatar & co don’t accept zuko into the group? it’s a risk but zuko knows what he has to do and has probably known it for a long time. it’s hard to BREAK AWAY BUT ZUKO FINALLY DID IT. and you know what!!!!!! when zuko stood up to his father and told ozai that now it’s his (ozai’s) turn to listen to zuko……… it was literally the BEST thing ever lmfao. here’s a part of what zuko says:

“i’ve come to an even more important decision. i’m going to join the avatar and i’m going to help him defeat you.”

zuko says “I’VE come to the decision” and i think that’s important cos he came to the decision on his own. like ya his uncle was there for him but honestly like… no one told him to do any of that!!!!! underneath that anger, this is who he is: a kind, compassionate person????? now i don’t even know what i’m trying to get at anymore but i guess just the way he says “but i’ve come to an even more important decision” just gets to me like. it’s important that he made his own choice and wasn’t coerced into it bc that makes his choices more real and genuine. if zuko wasn’t a good person underneath all that anger and bitterness then would he have done this? no, lol. the audience loves zuko’s redemption arc because he never truly bad on the inside, he made mistakes, realized them, made the active decision to do better and be better for others, and does that continuously thru s3 and we can assume after the series ends as well. zuko in s3 isn’t the zuko in s1 and we SEE that and that’s what we love abt his arc.

e) tea

isn’t zuko seen serving tea to every1 in the finale at the very end. like i’m sure iroh taught him how to brew the right cup of tea lmfao!!!!! idk much about diff types of tea but uh there’s diff temperatures u heat the water and how long u steep it and idk guess it’s an art huh